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00:01:02,824 --> 00:01:05,356
Season 21 - Episode 01
- Homer the Whopper -
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00:01:11,133 --> 00:01:13,239
Milhouse, watch me make
a loser lose it.
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00:01:15,603 --> 00:01:17,743
Customers, how I hate them.
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00:01:18,103 --> 00:01:21,270
Excuse me. I just heard that before
Spider-Man was a movie,
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00:01:21,395 --> 00:01:23,708
it was a comic book,
is that possible?
6
00:01:24,075 --> 00:01:25,075
What the...?
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00:01:25,914 --> 00:01:27,753
Suffering Steve Ditko!
8
00:01:27,921 --> 00:01:29,255
How can you not know
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00:01:29,423 --> 00:01:30,950
that Spider-Man
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00:01:31,075 --> 00:01:33,592
first appeared in 1962's classic
11
00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:35,845
Amazing Fantasy #15?!
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00:01:37,846 --> 00:01:38,848
12 cents!
13
00:01:39,743 --> 00:01:41,783
- I'll take 8.
- What the...? You idiot!
14
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Mint condition copies are,
like, $40,000 each!
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Must lie down
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on pile of unsold Hulk Hands.
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00:01:49,464 --> 00:01:51,886
Hulk smash. Hulk smash-smash.
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Hulk smash.
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00:01:55,784 --> 00:01:56,823
What's this?
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00:01:57,910 --> 00:01:59,118
"Everyman"?
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He's not a hero from Marvel, DC,
Image or WildStorm.
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"It was a typical day
for delivery man
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00:02:06,158 --> 00:02:08,527
Avery Mann until..."
24
00:02:08,652 --> 00:02:11,589
- Help! Bank robbers!
- Shut your yap.
25
00:02:13,384 --> 00:02:15,664
Time for this average man
to disappear.
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Look at that fat guy
beatin' it like an egg.
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He's scramblin' like an egg.
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- Egg.
- Egg.
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Laugh while you can.
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Everyman absorbs
the powers of every superhero
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whose comic book he touches.
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Power-Absorption Power...
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Absorb!
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It's just a flyin' fat
so keep robbin'.
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Good afternoon.
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00:03:03,099 --> 00:03:05,778
Put me in Sing-Sing!
It's safer!
37
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Perfect.
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Plastic Man powers...
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Absorb!
40
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Going somewhere?
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Everyman will stop
every crime every time.
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And I... am...
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Everyman.
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00:03:29,439 --> 00:03:31,814
Put my comic down.
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- You made this?!
- Shut up.
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00:03:33,922 --> 00:03:37,299
No one is interested in the critical
judgment of a worthless child...
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Actually, I like it.
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- You what now?
- Everyman is awesome.
49
00:03:42,918 --> 00:03:45,175
Reading it,
I escaped from my troubles.
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Now they're back in spades.
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- Have you shown this to anyone?
- No. If copies got out,
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00:03:50,647 --> 00:03:52,940
it would be ridiculed by
the online community:
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00:03:53,108 --> 00:03:57,152
SonofSpock, TheDorkKnight,
and IkilledKenny6475.
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Don't be afraid of them.
They're just lame-o's like yourself.
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Two of them are me.
56
00:04:01,533 --> 00:04:02,490
Very well.
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I... shall...
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self-publish.
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00:04:05,996 --> 00:04:07,997
How many issues have you written?
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00:04:09,077 --> 00:04:10,814
Just 335,
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00:04:10,939 --> 00:04:13,669
including
the controversial number 289,
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00:04:13,837 --> 00:04:15,412
featuring the death of Marmaduke.
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00:04:21,626 --> 00:04:23,674
Comic Book Guy's been writing
these for years.
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00:04:23,799 --> 00:04:26,035
Who knew a troubled person
could be creative?
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00:04:26,947 --> 00:04:28,726
Still waters run deep.
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I'm so rich.
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I'm so rich.
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00:05:02,761 --> 00:05:04,887
What's our next big summer franchise?
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00:05:05,055 --> 00:05:06,555
You want an original idea?
70
00:05:06,723 --> 00:05:09,168
Yes. Let your imaginations run free.
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00:05:09,293 --> 00:05:11,469
Something that's never been
a movie before,
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- but feels like it has.
- Extension cords.
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00:05:13,878 --> 00:05:15,230
- Mixed nuts.
- Car keys.
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00:05:15,791 --> 00:05:18,567
We've already made everything
that could possibly be a movie
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00:05:18,692 --> 00:05:20,792
into a great movie.
There's nothin' left.
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00:05:21,312 --> 00:05:23,041
Dad, can we go?
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00:05:23,166 --> 00:05:26,909
- I've watched all the DVDs in the Bentley.
- Jonah, what's that in your hand?
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00:05:27,578 --> 00:05:29,973
Big surprise that
you don't know what this is.
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00:05:30,098 --> 00:05:33,608
It's only Everyman,
the coolest comic book ever.
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00:05:33,733 --> 00:05:36,015
- What are his powers?
- All of them.
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00:05:36,756 --> 00:05:39,689
Our next big summer movie
will be Everyman.
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00:05:40,090 --> 00:05:43,555
Marv? Ginormous Pictures bought
the rights to Everyman 3 weeks ago.
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00:05:43,680 --> 00:05:44,635
Damn it!
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00:05:46,443 --> 00:05:49,596
We at Ginormous Pictures
are incredible fans
85
00:05:49,721 --> 00:05:52,476
and think Everyman
would make a fantastic movie.
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00:05:52,644 --> 00:05:55,688
Really? The way you thought "Stratego"
would make a good movie?
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00:05:55,856 --> 00:05:57,333
You'd expect us to believe
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00:05:57,458 --> 00:05:59,634
that a red scout
would date a blue general?
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00:05:59,759 --> 00:06:01,318
Gu... ffaw.
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00:06:01,486 --> 00:06:04,446
Hey, don't blame us.
Brett Ratner had final cut.
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00:06:04,614 --> 00:06:06,546
I'm well aware of who had what cut.
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00:06:11,819 --> 00:06:14,431
Let me get to the point:
It is not money I am after,
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or women, I know that is impossible.
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What I want is to pick
the actor who will play Everyman.
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No can do.
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Thank you.
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- But we never give...
- Thank you.
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- They'll laugh us out of Hollywood.
- I repeat:
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Thank you.
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00:06:30,087 --> 00:06:32,349
- Fine. You got it.
- Thank you.
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00:06:35,846 --> 00:06:37,571
I played hardball with Hollywood.
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The closest I will ever come
to playing a sport in my life.
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00:06:42,485 --> 00:06:44,486
"Wherever there's
a crime to be solved,
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"I will be there to solve...
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...it."
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00:06:48,358 --> 00:06:52,202
And there's more, but my fax machine
ran out of ink, so I can't read it.
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00:06:52,327 --> 00:06:55,330
Do you know where you can buy ink
for an Amiga brand fax machine?
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00:06:55,498 --> 00:06:57,499
Thank you, that was great.
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00:06:57,667 --> 00:07:00,943
You want to see it any other way?
Like sad... or Brooklyn,
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00:07:01,068 --> 00:07:04,506
- or Richard Nixon voice?
- Pass.
111
00:07:04,674 --> 00:07:07,743
But I already bought a boat
with the money you were gonna pay me.
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00:07:09,346 --> 00:07:12,782
Come on, Comic Book Guy,
you've gotta pick someone.
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00:07:12,907 --> 00:07:14,654
We've already read three people.
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Don't you latté-sipping leeches
understand?
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I've seen enough
of these Hollywood super-hunks.
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We need a dumpy,
unappealing loser: an everyman.
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Can you help me out?
I need change for a dollar.
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I also need a dollar.
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You... are... acceptable.
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00:07:41,169 --> 00:07:42,795
Great. Do you want to see me naked?
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00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:45,297
- There's no nudity in this movie.
- What movie?
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Let's go around the table,
and everybody say
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one amazing thing
that happened to them today. Lisa?
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00:07:51,882 --> 00:07:55,635
- I qualified for the National Math Bee...
- Great. Marge, go.
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00:07:55,803 --> 00:07:58,179
Guess who the garden club
elected president?
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00:07:58,347 --> 00:08:00,723
- You? Awesome. Next.
- No. I lost.
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00:08:00,891 --> 00:08:02,141
They can go to Hell. Bart?
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00:08:02,309 --> 00:08:04,978
Dr. Hibbert found out my thyroid
isn't pumping out enough...
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00:08:05,146 --> 00:08:08,400
Time's up. Okay, Maggie: "suck, suck"
that takes us to... me.
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00:08:11,819 --> 00:08:14,821
Some Hollywood idiots hired me
to star in a movie.
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No kidding?!
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Homer, we have a problem.
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Fine. I'll give back the Oscars
I stole from the lobby.
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- Do you want the Golden Globe?
- No! No...
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But we have a bigger problem.
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Homer, my brother and I showed
this picture of you
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to a cross-section
of typical moviegoers.
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00:08:35,176 --> 00:08:37,235
Not one thought
you looked like a superhero.
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00:08:37,360 --> 00:08:40,383
Several people stared at the sun,
attempting to blind themselves.
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Stared at the sun.
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Against every animal instinct they had.
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We need you to slim down,
muscle up and become
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the Everyman people want to be
instead of the one they actually are.
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I don't know if I can.
I'm a yo-yo dieter:
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00:08:53,441 --> 00:08:56,293
"Yo, hot dog man. Yo, peanuts."
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00:08:57,091 --> 00:08:59,225
Why aren't you laughing?
Don't you know what "yo" means?
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00:08:59,350 --> 00:09:01,518
Maybe I can help.
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00:09:02,714 --> 00:09:03,933
Lyle McCarthy.
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00:09:04,213 --> 00:09:06,945
Finally, the answer to my problem.
150
00:09:07,238 --> 00:09:10,251
- What do you do?
- He's the trainer to the stars.
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00:09:10,419 --> 00:09:13,546
Here's what Brad and Angelina
looked like before they met me.
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00:09:15,424 --> 00:09:17,506
They look good
with a little meat on their bones.
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00:09:17,631 --> 00:09:18,718
Come with me.
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00:09:19,074 --> 00:09:20,808
Take my hand, Homer,
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00:09:20,933 --> 00:09:23,456
and wave good-bye to fat you.
156
00:09:23,581 --> 00:09:24,739
Good-bye, fat me.
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00:09:25,059 --> 00:09:27,928
You sure that guy who created
Everyman's gonna like this?
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00:09:28,053 --> 00:09:29,937
Him? He's gone Hollywood.
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00:09:32,928 --> 00:09:36,319
...a lot of people have come
to this town and changed, but not me.
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00:09:37,738 --> 00:09:39,954
Now excuse me,
I have to read a story
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to my adopted Cambodian orphan.
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00:09:42,291 --> 00:09:45,404
Nannies,
produce the child and the story.
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00:09:45,929 --> 00:09:49,341
Hello, Prius... give Daddy a kiss.
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00:09:53,407 --> 00:09:55,503
Do you know why you eat?
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Because I'm swallowing
my frustrations and disappointments?
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Something bad happens and you cope
by cramming a donut in your mouth.
167
00:10:02,388 --> 00:10:04,514
Well, you don't always have time to ***.
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00:10:04,682 --> 00:10:08,476
I'm gonna teach you healthy emotional
alternatives to eating.
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00:10:08,644 --> 00:10:11,636
We don't have much time, so we'll do it
in a montage to the song
170
00:10:11,761 --> 00:10:13,023
"Eye of the Tiger."
171
00:10:15,148 --> 00:10:18,479
That song's a little on the nose.
Can we do it to David Bowie's "Heroes"?
172
00:10:18,604 --> 00:10:20,077
It's your montage.
173
00:10:27,582 --> 00:10:29,622
This montage sounds really exhausting.
174
00:10:29,790 --> 00:10:32,750
How about I just do
a walking around sad montage?
175
00:10:33,419 --> 00:10:36,421
A montage of me turning a ragtag
Little League team into state runners-up?
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00:10:37,047 --> 00:10:40,231
Me using funny modes of transportation
like a hot air balloon and a camel,
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00:10:40,356 --> 00:10:41,941
and finally a truck full of chickens?
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00:10:42,066 --> 00:10:43,989
Then I get out of it
and go to thank the driver,
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00:10:44,114 --> 00:10:46,973
- but the driver is a chicken?
- Let's just skip ahead a month.
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10,001... 10,002... and... fit.
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00:10:56,734 --> 00:11:00,355
I gotta take this.
Tobey! Cider House Rules!
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Total wuss.
183
00:11:02,076 --> 00:11:04,495
Seabiscuit, you keeping off
the sugar cubes?
184
00:11:04,620 --> 00:11:05,964
I hatethis guy.
185
00:11:06,089 --> 00:11:07,593
I love this guy!
186
00:11:07,718 --> 00:11:09,936
Tobe, Tobe, Tobe,
we talked about this.
187
00:11:10,061 --> 00:11:12,707
If the rice ain't brown,
don't chow down.
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00:11:12,875 --> 00:11:15,132
I gotta bail...
I'm with Everyman right now.
189
00:11:16,003 --> 00:11:18,083
Don't worry. He totally sucks.
190
00:11:18,505 --> 00:11:20,075
I'm only lying to him.
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00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:21,215
Good-bye!
192
00:11:21,383 --> 00:11:22,467
Bad-bye.
193
00:11:22,635 --> 00:11:24,260
Was that Tobey Maguire?
194
00:11:24,428 --> 00:11:25,776
Home Town Buffet,
195
00:11:25,901 --> 00:11:28,829
like I told John Travolta,
my client list is private.
196
00:11:28,954 --> 00:11:31,478
You know what? Enough chitchat.
Hit the pole!
197
00:11:31,769 --> 00:11:32,897
Stripper up...
198
00:11:33,022 --> 00:11:34,614
fireman down.
199
00:11:34,739 --> 00:11:35,842
And sexy.
200
00:11:35,967 --> 00:11:37,006
Heroic!
201
00:11:37,131 --> 00:11:38,103
Sexy.
202
00:11:38,228 --> 00:11:39,452
Heroic!
203
00:11:39,577 --> 00:11:40,656
And sexy.
204
00:11:40,781 --> 00:11:42,182
Heroic!
205
00:11:42,307 --> 00:11:43,646
Earn that money.
206
00:11:44,852 --> 00:11:46,377
Found this on the roof.
207
00:11:46,867 --> 00:11:49,739
Well, I think we've seen
the last of the Purple Pariah.
208
00:11:49,912 --> 00:11:51,037
Thanks, Everyman.
209
00:11:51,205 --> 00:11:52,277
Don't thank me.
210
00:11:52,402 --> 00:11:53,885
Thank Captain America
211
00:11:54,010 --> 00:11:55,459
for giving me the patriotism
212
00:11:55,584 --> 00:11:57,485
to want to save
the president's life.
213
00:11:57,610 --> 00:11:58,989
And thank Wonder Woman
214
00:11:59,114 --> 00:12:02,324
for giving me the boobs
to distract the guards.
215
00:12:02,675 --> 00:12:03,591
And... cut.
216
00:12:03,947 --> 00:12:06,213
- What'd you think, kids?
- That was awesome!
217
00:12:06,338 --> 00:12:08,423
Although there were
a few holes in the story.
218
00:12:08,548 --> 00:12:10,712
That's the problem when
you have 17 writers.
219
00:12:10,837 --> 00:12:13,309
But don't worry, we have
two fresh ones working on it.
220
00:12:18,697 --> 00:12:21,889
Ooh, Homie, take
your shirt off again.
221
00:12:22,942 --> 00:12:25,519
Oh! There's less of you to love,
222
00:12:25,644 --> 00:12:28,241
but I love you even more!
223
00:12:28,860 --> 00:12:30,460
Aah! What was that?
224
00:12:30,585 --> 00:12:31,803
Your other hand.
225
00:12:50,694 --> 00:12:52,044
Cut! Terrific.
226
00:12:52,234 --> 00:12:53,766
Bring in the next helicopter.
227
00:12:56,475 --> 00:12:59,116
Awesome performance, Homer.
I smell Oscar.
228
00:12:59,241 --> 00:13:02,163
Oscar, take a shower,
or a tomato bath or something.
229
00:13:02,288 --> 00:13:03,104
Please!
230
00:13:03,819 --> 00:13:07,221
This life is the greatest...
I get paid a fortune,
231
00:13:07,346 --> 00:13:09,768
I've got a closet full
of free sneakers and watches,
232
00:13:09,893 --> 00:13:11,816
and I get to hire my friends.
233
00:13:11,941 --> 00:13:14,791
At least you get to see
my face-- unlike Carl.
234
00:13:14,916 --> 00:13:17,490
I'm being paid to do what I love!
235
00:13:19,730 --> 00:13:21,892
A lot of things come and go in life,
236
00:13:22,017 --> 00:13:24,345
but not fame and fitness.
237
00:13:24,957 --> 00:13:28,160
Homer! Homer Sapian, can
I have a word with you?
238
00:13:28,285 --> 00:13:31,324
I know this is a bad time, but
I'm leaving for another gig.
239
00:13:31,449 --> 00:13:36,100
Is that all this temporary
job was to you, a gig?
240
00:13:36,268 --> 00:13:38,603
Don't take it personally, Home Team.
241
00:13:38,771 --> 00:13:41,230
But how will I keep from overeating?
242
00:13:41,355 --> 00:13:43,232
Just remember what I taught you.
243
00:13:43,400 --> 00:13:45,735
But you taught me the only
people who can stay thin
244
00:13:45,860 --> 00:13:49,655
are those who can afford $5,000-a-week
nutritional consultants!
245
00:13:49,954 --> 00:13:51,404
I've taught you well.
246
00:13:51,562 --> 00:13:52,590
Good-bye.
247
00:14:07,369 --> 00:14:08,504
He's gone.
248
00:14:12,184 --> 00:14:14,138
One cheese cube couldn't hurt.
249
00:14:15,920 --> 00:14:18,356
Ooh! This other cheese cube
stuck to the first one.
250
00:14:18,481 --> 00:14:20,269
Well, that still
technically counts as one.
251
00:14:23,047 --> 00:14:25,845
Mm, it's bad luck to eat an
uneven number of cheese cubes.
252
00:14:37,502 --> 00:14:38,760
Don't look at me!
253
00:14:40,311 --> 00:14:41,773
Don't look at me!
254
00:14:42,089 --> 00:14:43,194
You, you watch.
255
00:14:46,752 --> 00:14:49,908
Avery, I swear, you're the
only man in Gothamopolis
256
00:14:50,033 --> 00:14:52,188
who's never seen Everyman.
257
00:14:52,313 --> 00:14:54,501
Well, one thing's for sure:
258
00:14:54,626 --> 00:14:56,421
I'm not Everyman.
259
00:15:01,599 --> 00:15:02,428
Cut!
260
00:15:02,836 --> 00:15:03,895
This is a disaster.
261
00:15:04,020 --> 00:15:05,819
I'm getting a bad
feeling about this film.
262
00:15:05,944 --> 00:15:07,792
The star's overweight,
we're way over budget,
263
00:15:07,917 --> 00:15:09,747
and the grasshopperaptor
we built seems
264
00:15:09,872 --> 00:15:11,813
to have developed an evil mind
of its own.
265
00:15:25,792 --> 00:15:29,080
Oh, Marge, I'm ready
for some lovin'.
266
00:15:29,248 --> 00:15:31,082
Come and get me!
267
00:15:35,871 --> 00:15:37,088
Marge! Speak to me!
268
00:15:37,256 --> 00:15:39,507
I think you may have
put on a little weight.
269
00:15:39,675 --> 00:15:41,176
Nag, nag, nag!
270
00:15:43,056 --> 00:15:44,557
Apu, I have to lose weight now.
271
00:15:44,682 --> 00:15:46,443
Do you have anything
that'll make me vomit?
272
00:15:46,568 --> 00:15:47,916
Well, I don't know,
273
00:15:48,041 --> 00:15:50,935
I... might have some milk
that has expired.
274
00:15:52,752 --> 00:15:53,938
Ah, here we are.
275
00:15:54,106 --> 00:15:56,923
A delightful buttermilk from 1961.
276
00:15:57,860 --> 00:15:58,857
Oh, '61...
277
00:15:58,982 --> 00:16:02,447
everyone was twisting again like
they did the previous summer.
278
00:16:07,348 --> 00:16:10,038
Whatever you do,
do not chew the chunks.
279
00:16:11,707 --> 00:16:12,518
Oh, boy.
280
00:16:12,643 --> 00:16:14,352
Cleanup in aisles in three,
281
00:16:14,477 --> 00:16:15,960
two, one...
282
00:16:19,632 --> 00:16:20,922
And... action!
283
00:16:23,215 --> 00:16:24,052
What?
284
00:16:24,220 --> 00:16:25,065
Cut.
285
00:16:25,388 --> 00:16:26,971
- Where's Homer?
- In his trailer.
286
00:16:27,139 --> 00:16:29,140
- He won't come out?
- He can'tcome out.
287
00:16:33,979 --> 00:16:37,482
This film is an embarrassment
of Jar-Jarrian magnitude!
288
00:16:38,734 --> 00:16:41,736
As the writer, I demand
to express my opinion.
289
00:16:41,904 --> 00:16:43,738
Ooh, I'm afraid that's
not gonna happen.
290
00:16:43,906 --> 00:16:44,728
I see.
291
00:16:44,853 --> 00:16:46,206
Well, I respect that...
292
00:16:46,331 --> 00:16:48,033
and Vulcan death grip!
293
00:16:48,835 --> 00:16:50,439
Hollywood ponytail yank!
294
00:16:54,191 --> 00:16:57,628
My only sin was believing
in George Clooney!
295
00:17:05,284 --> 00:17:06,518
How you doing, man?
296
00:17:09,094 --> 00:17:12,101
Ooh, I think we have a clunker here.
297
00:17:12,226 --> 00:17:14,559
And I should know
I produced Bad Summer Movie,
298
00:17:14,684 --> 00:17:17,692
the parody of bad summer movies that
was itself a bad summer movie.
299
00:17:17,817 --> 00:17:19,762
Don't worry, we fixed
everything with editing.
300
00:17:19,887 --> 00:17:22,787
Editing solves everything
except my problems with the IRS.
301
00:17:22,912 --> 00:17:24,217
Yeah, how's that going?
302
00:17:35,569 --> 00:17:36,789
Everyman...
303
00:17:37,050 --> 00:17:39,370
show your-ssself.
304
00:17:40,682 --> 00:17:41,776
I'm right here.
305
00:17:42,120 --> 00:17:44,028
I've been here all along.
306
00:18:01,547 --> 00:18:04,132
Half the shots he's fat,
half the shots he's thin...
307
00:18:04,257 --> 00:18:05,883
it's taking me out of the moment.
308
00:18:06,008 --> 00:18:07,954
Like when you're kissing
a girl, and she burps.
309
00:18:08,079 --> 00:18:10,513
Who was in charge
of continuity on this picture?
310
00:18:10,811 --> 00:18:13,808
I tried to show them the Polaroids...
they wouldn't look.
311
00:18:13,976 --> 00:18:15,992
It's your job to get
their attention.
312
00:18:16,117 --> 00:18:17,979
Nobody takes responsibility anymore.
313
00:18:18,147 --> 00:18:20,968
Well, I-I just wanted
to get back into the business
314
00:18:21,093 --> 00:18:22,608
after I had my kids.
315
00:18:22,776 --> 00:18:25,319
Yeah, well, now those kids have
an embarrassment for a mother.
316
00:18:27,022 --> 00:18:28,114
Home Boy.
317
00:18:28,838 --> 00:18:30,213
What happened, dude?
318
00:18:30,338 --> 00:18:32,952
You went from Everyman
to Everywhereman.
319
00:18:33,685 --> 00:18:35,197
What happened is, you left!
320
00:18:35,372 --> 00:18:36,999
Who did you leave me for?
321
00:18:37,124 --> 00:18:39,544
Tell me...
I can take it.
322
00:18:41,505 --> 00:18:44,338
Okay!
It was Turtle from Entourage.
323
00:18:44,506 --> 00:18:45,506
I knew it!
324
00:18:48,510 --> 00:18:51,367
Come on, Home Run.
It's okay, Home Alone.
325
00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:53,356
Look, I'm sorry.
326
00:18:53,481 --> 00:18:55,848
Let me make this up to you:
I'll train you,
327
00:18:55,973 --> 00:18:59,729
then leave you again, then
come back and train you.
328
00:18:59,897 --> 00:19:01,792
It's how I make my money.
329
00:19:02,854 --> 00:19:03,941
Just you and me?
330
00:19:04,109 --> 00:19:05,463
You, me...
331
00:19:05,588 --> 00:19:06,444
and Turtle.
332
00:19:06,704 --> 00:19:08,196
That could work.
333
00:19:08,363 --> 00:19:10,106
He is a great guy.
334
00:19:10,231 --> 00:19:11,961
He's an awful guy.
335
00:19:12,183 --> 00:19:14,347
You just said both
those things to me.
336
00:19:14,472 --> 00:19:15,543
I'm sorry.
337
00:19:15,668 --> 00:19:17,340
I'm not sorry.
338
00:19:18,500 --> 00:19:20,481
Look, Comic Book Guy,
about the movie,
339
00:19:20,606 --> 00:19:22,187
we know it's not great.
340
00:19:22,312 --> 00:19:25,301
Yeah, the projectionist
hung himself at the final reel.
341
00:19:25,426 --> 00:19:26,958
But you created Everyman
342
00:19:27,083 --> 00:19:28,883
your fans will think
whatever you tell 'em.
343
00:19:29,051 --> 00:19:31,024
If you put the word out
that this movie is good,
344
00:19:31,149 --> 00:19:32,637
we'll let you direct the sequel.
345
00:19:32,805 --> 00:19:34,402
You would let me direct
346
00:19:34,527 --> 00:19:36,636
Everyman 2: Rise of the Revenge?
347
00:19:36,809 --> 00:19:39,355
Absolutely!
All you have to do
348
00:19:39,480 --> 00:19:42,563
is tell your army of Internet
dweebs to go see this movie.
349
00:19:42,731 --> 00:19:45,637
Hmm, sell my soul
for Hollywood lucre,
350
00:19:45,762 --> 00:19:48,352
or stay true to my lofty ideals.
351
00:19:48,765 --> 00:19:50,500
Everyman,the motion picture,
352
00:19:50,625 --> 00:19:52,855
is the combination
of a life-long dream,
353
00:19:52,980 --> 00:19:54,411
and I was one of the few
354
00:19:54,536 --> 00:19:57,402
who saw that dream realized
on screen last night.
355
00:19:57,527 --> 00:20:01,379
If there is one fault to find
with this $200 million production,
356
00:20:01,504 --> 00:20:03,968
it is that this is the worst
357
00:20:04,294 --> 00:20:05,920
movie ever!
358
00:20:06,088 --> 00:20:07,494
And send!
359
00:20:07,731 --> 00:20:08,807
And sip.
360
00:20:11,355 --> 00:20:12,945
Though legislation was passed
361
00:20:13,070 --> 00:20:15,930
to ensure Everyman was
never seen on screens again,
362
00:20:16,296 --> 00:20:20,007
he remains in the hearts
of every man, woman and child
363
00:20:20,132 --> 00:20:21,226
looking for justice,
364
00:20:21,351 --> 00:20:24,971
or just hoping to see
bad people beaten up.
365
00:20:25,179 --> 00:20:26,582
I'm so cold.
366
00:20:27,693 --> 00:20:30,707
Transcript : Forom
367
00:20:31,430 --> 00:20:34,442
Traduction :
Robot, Skualler, Strex, Job22
368
00:20:35,082 --> 00:20:38,113
Synchro : Robot, Job22
369
00:20:38,916 --> 00:20:41,928
For Forom.com