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The D'oh Team présente...
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Traduction : Kenji,
Synchro : Kenji, sw38
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Relecture : Bartelemix, Sebaset
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Thanks to swsub.com
for the transcript.
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All right,
next on my shopping list...
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a new phone.
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Attention, shoppers,
Iphone is now 20 cents.
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What happened to that
mini-cell phone I gave you, Sir ?
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00:01:06,254 --> 00:01:08,583
Ooh, I thought it
was a lemon drop.
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I'll go get
the number de-listed.
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Well, well.
What have we here ?
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Why do I need another penny ?
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I have Billions.
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Still, if I don't take it,
that hoodlum over there might.
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All right, penny,
prepare to be pinched.
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Come to Papa.
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Help...me !
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Help...me !
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Help me !
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00:01:51,532 --> 00:01:52,884
I guess this is the end.
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I just wish, i had spent more time
at the office.
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Hey, you're not a penny !
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00:02:05,784 --> 00:02:06,798
You saved my life !
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00:02:06,995 --> 00:02:08,769
There must be something,
I can do for you ?
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00:02:08,929 --> 00:02:10,807
A cookie ! No, a car !
No, a cookie !
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00:02:11,213 --> 00:02:12,724
You're getting a free dinner.
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- With... - Yeah ?
- Me !
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00:02:14,922 --> 00:02:16,311
"Me" ? But that's you !
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00:02:16,490 --> 00:02:18,283
I'll pick you up
at 5:00 tomorrow.
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00:02:18,543 --> 00:02:20,666
And I'll pick you up
right now.
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Got It.
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00:02:28,269 --> 00:02:29,265
See you at 5:00, then.
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00:02:30,542 --> 00:02:32,091
Dinner with Mr. Burns...
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00:02:32,147 --> 00:02:35,338
what a waste of my precious,
precious, Saturday night.
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00:02:35,610 --> 00:02:37,187
Hey dad ! Have fun
with your boyfriend.
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00:02:37,385 --> 00:02:39,450
He is not my boyfriend !
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So, Simpson,
I hear you like pizza pie.
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I do.
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- My favorite is chicago deep-dish.
- Chicago, eh ?
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00:02:48,475 --> 00:02:50,503
Well... What if I took us
there now ?
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00:02:50,606 --> 00:02:52,184
Drive to Chicago ?
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00:02:52,250 --> 00:02:53,545
I don't have time for that.
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00:02:53,632 --> 00:02:57,097
I have to be back at work on Monday,
and my boss is a total jerk.
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Who said anything about drive ?
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A p-private jet !
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Now would you care for some sushi ?
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00:03:09,393 --> 00:03:12,501
Uh, yeah, but i'm on a plane, idiot.
48
00:03:14,728 --> 00:03:17,817
My name is Svetlana,
but you can call me, "Hey Baby."
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00:03:20,141 --> 00:03:21,822
And just so you know,...
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she'll do anything for you.
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Anything except sex !
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And i do mean, anything.
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Ooh, I'm aroused...
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and confused.
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... Scratchy Show !
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Stewardess !
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Sorry, everyone.
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Air traffic control says we have
to spend another three hours...
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00:04:03,033 --> 00:04:04,113
on the tarmac.
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00:04:08,455 --> 00:04:09,864
This is wonderful.
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00:04:10,108 --> 00:04:12,173
Now, why don't you listen
to the musical stylings...
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of Mr. Lionel Richie ?
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00:04:13,460 --> 00:04:15,441
Oh, my God ! Lionel Richie !
64
00:04:15,627 --> 00:04:18,425
Can you sing "Say You Say Me",
but make it about beer ?
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Sure, I guess.
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Hey, you, beer me.
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00:04:23,251 --> 00:04:24,960
Beer me for always.
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That's the way it should be.
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00:04:27,710 --> 00:04:30,498
Hey, you, beer me.
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Beer us together...
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naturally.
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Now make every word beer !
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Beer, beer.
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Beer, Beer
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Beer, beer, beer, beer.
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Huh, wait i forgot the word.
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Love you.
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00:04:57,879 --> 00:05:00,733
If i leave the plane,
i'll be just like every one else !
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00:05:03,926 --> 00:05:06,517
Ground control,
this is November 543 Charlie.
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We're gonna need the extractor.
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I want to be back on the plane.
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We'll be back before you know it.
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Svetlana ! Svetlana !
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Now let's enjoy
the Miami of Canada...
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Chicago !
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Okay, folks !
For our first improv...
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we gonna need an occupation.
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Billionaire !
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Oh, oh, Nice job !
Where do I apply ?
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Now, i need a location.
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I came to relax.
You think of it.
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I hear " a Starbucks...in Siberia".
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Killer premise.
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Finally, an emotion.
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Drunk !
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Okay, "drunk".
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And now we take you
to a drunken billionaire...
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at a Starbucks in Siberia.
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Uh, excuse me.
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I need a, I need a coffee.
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Can you change
a billion dollar bill ?
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Our coffee costs a billion dollars.
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This is Starbucks.
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In Siberia.
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Why are you applauding them ?
We wrote it.
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While you were here,
we felt like New York !
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I'm so happy.
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00:07:00,606 --> 00:07:03,367
Homer, you smell like Chicago.
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00:07:03,442 --> 00:07:05,630
Did fly there
on a commercial airline ?
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00:07:05,749 --> 00:07:08,575
No way ! Commercial is for losers
and terrorists.
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00:07:08,688 --> 00:07:10,585
I flew on a private plane.
112
00:07:11,775 --> 00:07:13,831
It is much different
from a normal plane ?
113
00:07:13,972 --> 00:07:15,841
Please, tell me you're joking.
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It's the difference between
champagne and carbonated pee.
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Homie, what's wrong ?
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I had it all for one night.
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Now for the rest of my life,
i'll know what i'm missing.
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And all i have to remember it by...
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is that my ears haven't popped.
120
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Well, i'll make sure that
I never yawn again !
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Hey, Homer.
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- Hi, Dad.
- Hi.
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High like a private plane ?
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The kind I'll never be
invited to ride on again.
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That's where
you're wrong, Homer.
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A fresh face!
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This is Colby Krause.
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I hired him to help you,
improve your life.
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He'll get you back on
a private plane in no time.
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00:08:02,215 --> 00:08:03,013
No way.
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00:08:03,197 --> 00:08:05,507
I don't need any shrink,
therapist,...
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counselor, motivational
speaker or "guru. "
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I'm a life coach.
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Oh, tell me more.
135
00:08:11,353 --> 00:08:13,325
The first step in self-improvement...
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00:08:13,363 --> 00:08:15,456
is to take a thorough
look at your life.
137
00:08:15,503 --> 00:08:16,518
If you're gonna film me,...
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00:08:16,527 --> 00:08:18,142
I insist on a body double.
139
00:08:18,712 --> 00:08:20,207
Is uncle fester still alive ?
140
00:08:20,407 --> 00:08:21,797
- The camera is not done yet right ?
- No.
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00:08:24,776 --> 00:08:27,521
Okay, now I just want you to do...
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what you normally do.
143
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Okay.
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00:08:31,601 --> 00:08:34,312
Well, uh...
Hmm, I'll just, hu...
145
00:08:35,204 --> 00:08:36,261
I forget what i do.
146
00:08:37,038 --> 00:08:38,224
Wait, what ?
147
00:08:39,045 --> 00:08:41,933
Uh, this is some
of what I do... I think.
148
00:08:42,355 --> 00:08:43,693
Sometimes I go places.
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This is our relish tray.
150
00:08:46,949 --> 00:08:48,790
I'd like you to film it
for insurance purposes.
151
00:08:49,643 --> 00:08:51,840
Oh, what's the point
of putting my socks on ?
152
00:08:51,859 --> 00:08:54,610
I just have to take them off
again a week later.
153
00:08:55,360 --> 00:08:57,811
Homer, before you even
head out the door, in the morning,...
154
00:08:57,904 --> 00:09:00,158
you're already a loser.
155
00:09:00,177 --> 00:09:02,853
Fine, I'll show you a winner,
just you watch.
156
00:09:06,812 --> 00:09:08,681
Think positive, think positive.
157
00:09:14,519 --> 00:09:15,299
You were saying ?
158
00:09:15,806 --> 00:09:19,017
Homer, your journey downstairs
would've been a lot safer...
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00:09:19,083 --> 00:09:22,332
if you'd rembered
the NDCs of concentration:
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00:09:22,360 --> 00:09:23,965
Never Don't Concentrate.
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00:09:24,337 --> 00:09:25,549
Will you shut up ?
162
00:09:25,596 --> 00:09:26,976
I can't hear the song
in my head!
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00:09:29,455 --> 00:09:30,976
Do you want to get a
reaction shot of his butt?
164
00:09:31,256 --> 00:09:33,210
No, but we should
get some background noise.
165
00:09:33,895 --> 00:09:35,623
Everyone quiet for four seconds.
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Thank you people.
Moving on.
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What ?
168
00:09:48,073 --> 00:09:49,979
Here's an important tip:
Stop doing that.
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00:09:53,653 --> 00:09:56,057
I really enjoyed
paying you to yell at me...
170
00:09:56,151 --> 00:09:58,423
and say I suck,
but it's no use.
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00:09:58,461 --> 00:10:00,592
I'm a hopeless loser
and always will be.
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00:10:00,702 --> 00:10:01,472
Homer, you're up!
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This I can do!
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- Whoa ! Boom !
- Way to go !
175
00:10:18,970 --> 00:10:22,304
Behold my 217
average and weep.
176
00:10:23,426 --> 00:10:25,520
As I said,
I've lost all hope.
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00:10:25,644 --> 00:10:27,419
Homer, here in
the bowling alley,...
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00:10:27,438 --> 00:10:29,147
you're a totally
different man...
179
00:10:29,175 --> 00:10:30,705
relaxed, confident...
180
00:10:30,818 --> 00:10:32,752
Is this going somewhere?
181
00:10:33,219 --> 00:10:34,778
But what we have to do
is figure a way...
182
00:10:34,834 --> 00:10:38,562
to make "Bowling Alley Homer"
into "Everyday Homer. "
183
00:10:38,860 --> 00:10:40,297
I have an aunt
who became an uncle.
184
00:10:40,616 --> 00:10:41,396
Is it like that?
185
00:10:43,910 --> 00:10:45,957
I want you to wear
those bowling shoes...
186
00:10:45,995 --> 00:10:48,117
out the door and
everywhere you go.
187
00:10:48,333 --> 00:10:50,812
It's crazy, but
it just might work.
188
00:10:51,092 --> 00:10:54,331
Dr. Fredrick J. Waxman,
you're a genius!
189
00:10:54,500 --> 00:10:55,749
That's not my name.
190
00:10:55,890 --> 00:10:57,007
I wasn't talking to you.
191
00:11:10,036 --> 00:11:11,726
Homer, your shoe attitude...
192
00:11:11,754 --> 00:11:13,247
is bowling people over.
193
00:11:13,345 --> 00:11:14,763
These are letters
from companies...
194
00:11:14,798 --> 00:11:16,594
interested in
interviewing you !
195
00:11:16,805 --> 00:11:18,589
How many of those
have private planes ?
196
00:11:18,752 --> 00:11:19,726
This one !
197
00:11:21,170 --> 00:11:23,235
"Handyman's Choice
Copper Tubing" ?
198
00:11:23,445 --> 00:11:25,170
They need
a safety inspector to fly...
199
00:11:25,190 --> 00:11:26,739
between their North American plants.
200
00:11:27,026 --> 00:11:28,556
I'm getting that job.
201
00:11:28,866 --> 00:11:31,007
Bart, I'll need some clean urine.
Stat.
202
00:11:31,888 --> 00:11:34,555
Now to make sure you're
motivated to get this job,...
203
00:11:34,592 --> 00:11:35,982
you have to quit
your old one.
204
00:11:36,142 --> 00:11:37,494
I'll call your boss right now.
205
00:11:41,651 --> 00:11:42,402
I'll get it, sir.
206
00:11:42,815 --> 00:11:44,120
Just send it
to voice mail.
207
00:11:48,993 --> 00:11:51,493
You here for the
safety inspector job ?
208
00:11:52,060 --> 00:11:55,018
Well, i can see
the position of handsomest CEO...
209
00:11:55,053 --> 00:11:56,379
is already taken.
210
00:11:56,497 --> 00:11:57,870
I like you already.
211
00:11:57,975 --> 00:12:00,499
If you can write your name
so I can read it, you're in.
212
00:12:03,820 --> 00:12:04,841
I got the job !
213
00:12:04,888 --> 00:12:06,261
Yay, Dad !
214
00:12:06,321 --> 00:12:07,870
We knew you could do it !
215
00:12:16,539 --> 00:12:18,159
Good luck
on your first day, Dad.
216
00:12:18,182 --> 00:12:19,274
Give 'em
hell, Homer.
217
00:12:20,487 --> 00:12:23,011
We're all so proud
of you, sweetie.
218
00:12:24,852 --> 00:12:27,434
I'm gonna get there early,
so I can get in good...
219
00:12:27,481 --> 00:12:28,572
with the lunch truck guy.
220
00:12:28,643 --> 00:12:30,063
Find out if he
has a wife !
221
00:12:30,133 --> 00:12:31,377
We could double date !
222
00:12:33,796 --> 00:12:35,429
- Yay, Dad !
- You're a Hero.
223
00:12:48,073 --> 00:12:49,294
Can I help you ?
224
00:12:49,557 --> 00:12:52,374
Uh, yeah. I have no
job and nowhere to go.
225
00:12:52,543 --> 00:12:55,275
What do I have to buy
so I can sit here all day ?
226
00:12:55,479 --> 00:12:58,155
Well, with a coffee,
you can stay till lunch.
227
00:12:58,286 --> 00:13:00,098
Then you have
to order a solid.
228
00:13:00,408 --> 00:13:02,108
One small
coffee, please.
229
00:13:02,267 --> 00:13:04,933
And a dozen of those
placemats with the maze on it.
230
00:13:05,253 --> 00:13:06,933
They're all the same maze.
231
00:13:07,232 --> 00:13:08,368
Somebody's got to do 'em.
232
00:13:42,583 --> 00:13:43,560
Look happy.
233
00:13:48,958 --> 00:13:51,636
So, how was your first day
at your new job ?
234
00:13:51,777 --> 00:13:53,279
Oh, it was great !
235
00:13:53,392 --> 00:13:55,157
Flew to Tulsa
on the company jet.
236
00:13:55,274 --> 00:13:58,429
Did my job in a way consistent
with what I already told you.
237
00:13:58,758 --> 00:14:00,401
Because, that's what you do.
238
00:14:00,663 --> 00:14:01,949
When you have a job !
239
00:14:02,070 --> 00:14:03,535
I'm so proud of you, Dad !
240
00:14:03,995 --> 00:14:05,948
Stop peppering me
with questions !
241
00:14:08,021 --> 00:14:09,289
Principal Skinner !
242
00:14:09,420 --> 00:14:10,688
Why did we have to leave...
243
00:14:10,706 --> 00:14:13,476
the Learn and Touch
Reptile Zoo so early ?
244
00:14:13,589 --> 00:14:15,645
Well, it seems
someone was riding...
245
00:14:15,683 --> 00:14:17,636
the giant tortoise naked.
246
00:14:17,869 --> 00:14:18,827
It's not my fault.
247
00:14:19,024 --> 00:14:20,827
The drinking fountain
dared me to do it.
248
00:14:24,422 --> 00:14:25,793
Freak fry !
249
00:14:25,811 --> 00:14:26,553
Look out
250
00:14:26,581 --> 00:14:29,135
If it touches you,
you die of suicide !
251
00:14:30,373 --> 00:14:31,565
Don't do it ! Don't do it !
252
00:14:35,714 --> 00:14:36,364
Dad ?
253
00:14:45,214 --> 00:14:46,697
I know it's you, Homer.
254
00:14:51,155 --> 00:14:52,724
Why aren't you
at your new job ?
255
00:14:52,846 --> 00:14:56,320
Well, explanation-wise,
the fact is that...
256
00:14:56,645 --> 00:14:58,551
I lied.
I didn't get the job.
257
00:14:58,720 --> 00:14:59,922
You see when
I got there.
258
00:15:01,058 --> 00:15:03,509
So, she said,
"That's not my in-box,"...
259
00:15:03,594 --> 00:15:06,608
and he said,
"That's not the Johnson Report !"
260
00:15:08,718 --> 00:15:12,052
You sure know how to repeat
the joke I just told ya.
261
00:15:13,430 --> 00:15:16,219
But as a formality, I must ask :
262
00:15:16,463 --> 00:15:19,411
Do you know
anything about copper tubing ?
263
00:15:23,296 --> 00:15:25,099
Come on, say
"You're hired"!
264
00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:27,446
Say it !
265
00:15:27,530 --> 00:15:30,168
Leave your resume with Cheryl.
266
00:15:30,441 --> 00:15:31,286
Say it !
267
00:15:31,425 --> 00:15:33,979
Security ! Security !
268
00:15:34,148 --> 00:15:35,425
Stop saying
"Security"!
269
00:15:35,472 --> 00:15:38,007
Come on,
just give me the job.
270
00:15:38,388 --> 00:15:40,207
I like your hat.
271
00:15:40,386 --> 00:15:43,344
Just say the word !
272
00:15:45,001 --> 00:15:46,609
I couldn't bear to
tell your mother,...
273
00:15:46,715 --> 00:15:48,510
so I hang out
here all day.
274
00:15:48,698 --> 00:15:50,248
But, Dad,
you gotta tell her.
275
00:15:50,283 --> 00:15:52,524
She's been buying
brand-name groceries.
276
00:15:52,616 --> 00:15:54,870
Brands like "Miser's Choice"
and "Day-Old Delights"?
277
00:15:55,222 --> 00:15:56,912
No, things
rich people buy,...
278
00:15:56,947 --> 00:15:58,790
like Campbell's Soup
and Pepsodent.
279
00:16:05,945 --> 00:16:07,001
Hello ?
280
00:16:07,486 --> 00:16:09,810
Honey, there's something
I have to tell you.
281
00:16:10,350 --> 00:16:11,735
It's bad news, isn't it ?
282
00:16:11,845 --> 00:16:13,500
I should never get my hopes up.
283
00:16:13,594 --> 00:16:15,542
Nothing ever works out for us.
284
00:16:16,247 --> 00:16:17,221
No, it's, uh...
285
00:16:18,019 --> 00:16:19,357
- good news !
- Really ?
286
00:16:20,732 --> 00:16:23,678
We're manufacturing
a new pipe diameter,...
287
00:16:23,878 --> 00:16:24,687
five-eights inch.
288
00:16:24,927 --> 00:16:28,448
The company wants you and me
to take the private plane...
289
00:16:28,495 --> 00:16:30,314
to New York for the premiere !
290
00:16:30,514 --> 00:16:32,990
So meet me at Shelbyville
Airport in an hour.
291
00:16:33,974 --> 00:16:35,453
If I'm gonna tell
that woman the truth,...
292
00:16:35,488 --> 00:16:37,131
I'm going to do it
in the one place...
293
00:16:37,190 --> 00:16:38,493
no one can ever be sad.
294
00:16:40,185 --> 00:16:42,039
Okay. So this should be
enough money...
295
00:16:42,063 --> 00:16:44,809
to get me up in the air,
have a frank talk with Marge,...
296
00:16:44,880 --> 00:16:46,558
then maybe eat a deviled egg.
297
00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:48,361
Well, anything,
for a fellow Marine.
298
00:16:48,537 --> 00:16:50,263
Yeah, semper fudge
299
00:16:50,450 --> 00:16:52,645
Uh, did you just say
"Semper fudge"?
300
00:16:52,804 --> 00:16:53,802
No, I said the
right thing.
301
00:16:54,741 --> 00:16:56,806
Look at this business center...
302
00:16:56,865 --> 00:17:00,727
fax, Wi-Fi, teleconferencing
capabilities.
303
00:17:01,062 --> 00:17:04,842
I'm gonna remember
this day for the rest of my life !
304
00:17:05,067 --> 00:17:06,393
Uh, honey...
305
00:17:07,076 --> 00:17:09,615
don't try to remember the whole day.
306
00:17:09,732 --> 00:17:11,390
Just what you're
feeling this second.
307
00:17:11,865 --> 00:17:13,684
Sweetheart, what do you mean?
308
00:17:13,743 --> 00:17:15,576
Marge, I gotta be honest...
309
00:17:16,838 --> 00:17:18,276
- What was that ?
- I don't know.
310
00:17:18,514 --> 00:17:20,058
Maybe, we flew through a rainbow.
311
00:17:25,479 --> 00:17:28,593
I didn't think I'd be flying today,
so I was doing heroin.
312
00:17:31,968 --> 00:17:33,464
Homie, what are you doing ?
313
00:17:33,655 --> 00:17:34,975
You don't know how to fly !
314
00:17:35,195 --> 00:17:37,712
I drove a car over a cliff once.
How different could it be ?
315
00:17:38,989 --> 00:17:41,336
Hmm, what's the ocean doing
in the sky ?
316
00:17:46,180 --> 00:17:48,630
There's only one man
who can help us now.
317
00:17:48,938 --> 00:17:50,948
Hello, and welcome to success.
318
00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:52,107
It's Marge Simpson.
319
00:17:52,225 --> 00:17:55,085
I need you to coach like
you've never coached before !
320
00:17:55,217 --> 00:17:56,626
Marge, please,
I'm with a client.
321
00:17:58,375 --> 00:18:00,311
Now you listen
here, bub !
322
00:18:00,502 --> 00:18:03,172
We paid you all the savings
we had in the world.
323
00:18:03,348 --> 00:18:06,224
You could at least tell my
husband something encouraging.
324
00:18:06,737 --> 00:18:08,747
All right, Homer.
What is it you're attempting to do ?
325
00:18:08,850 --> 00:18:10,229
Win over a difficult client ?
326
00:18:10,346 --> 00:18:12,371
I'm trying to land a plane
with no experience.
327
00:18:13,998 --> 00:18:15,685
Homer, I gotta tell you
I'm not very good.
328
00:18:15,715 --> 00:18:17,607
I went to the Harvard
of the South.
329
00:18:17,637 --> 00:18:18,825
Duke? That's good.
330
00:18:19,089 --> 00:18:20,542
- Not Duke.
- Vanderbilt ?
331
00:18:20,703 --> 00:18:23,461
A little further South.
Don't make me say it.
332
00:18:27,321 --> 00:18:29,962
Duffman has reported you
to the FAA.
333
00:18:30,123 --> 00:18:32,398
This near miss will be
investigated...
334
00:18:32,442 --> 00:18:35,302
by a board of three
retired pilots.
335
00:18:36,227 --> 00:18:38,383
Okay, Homer,
i don't know anything about planes,...
336
00:18:38,413 --> 00:18:39,792
but I know about you.
337
00:18:39,880 --> 00:18:42,257
You have what made America great :
338
00:18:42,367 --> 00:18:45,243
No understanding of the limits
of your power,...
339
00:18:45,375 --> 00:18:48,573
and a complete lack of concern
for what anyone thinks of you.
340
00:18:48,676 --> 00:18:51,669
So you'll land that plane.
And do you know why ?
341
00:18:51,893 --> 00:18:54,549
Because I heard some guy say
you couldn't.
342
00:18:54,681 --> 00:18:56,486
What ? I'll show him.
343
00:18:56,662 --> 00:18:58,261
I'll show that guy !
344
00:19:02,615 --> 00:19:05,740
Elevation 300 feet, 200 feet,
50 feet...
345
00:19:10,799 --> 00:19:12,151
Homer, you did it !
346
00:19:12,348 --> 00:19:13,776
You landed a jet !
347
00:19:13,841 --> 00:19:15,822
Now, to taxi to the terminal.
348
00:19:26,563 --> 00:19:29,060
Marge, flying in private jets
is great and all,...
349
00:19:29,172 --> 00:19:31,041
but it's just too dangerous.
350
00:19:31,398 --> 00:19:33,614
That's why I've decided
to go to the plant...
351
00:19:33,670 --> 00:19:36,346
and beg Mr. Burns
for my old job back.
352
00:19:36,708 --> 00:19:38,370
I understand, Homie.
353
00:19:39,478 --> 00:19:40,351
And at least we can take...
354
00:19:40,389 --> 00:19:42,549
the extra income you've earned
in the last few months...
355
00:19:42,584 --> 00:19:44,556
and set it aside for a rainy day.
356
00:19:44,678 --> 00:19:46,321
You'd think so, but no.
357
00:19:47,615 --> 00:19:50,939
Mr. Richie, your American Music
Awards are weighing us down !
358
00:19:51,127 --> 00:19:52,122
Let them go !
359
00:19:52,497 --> 00:19:53,905
You let yours go !
360
00:19:53,990 --> 00:19:54,807
I don't have any.
361
00:19:54,854 --> 00:19:56,272
That's right, you don't !
0
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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