1 00:00:06,409 --> 00:00:08,672 The Simpsons S19E12 - Love, Springfieldian Style - 2 00:00:23,839 --> 00:00:29,633 L is for the way you look at me 3 00:00:29,634 --> 00:00:36,166 O is for the only one I see 4 00:00:36,167 --> 00:00:42,560 V is very, very extraordinary 5 00:00:36,620 --> 00:00:37,696 Sweet on you 6 00:00:38,991 --> 00:00:40,067 Release the hounds 7 00:00:42,567 --> 00:00:46,529 E is even more than anyone that you adore 8 00:00:46,530 --> 00:00:50,193 I can't wait to see my Valentine's Day surprise. 9 00:00:50,202 --> 00:00:53,026 Good, 'cause I'm parking at it right now. 10 00:00:54,175 --> 00:00:55,990 A carnival? 11 00:00:56,034 --> 00:00:58,156 What's so romantic about this? 12 00:00:58,151 --> 00:00:59,520 - Bye! - See you later! 13 00:00:59,526 --> 00:01:02,793 For the next two hours, we'll be kid-free. 14 00:01:02,799 --> 00:01:06,093 It'll be just like the time we lost them at the mall. 15 00:01:06,166 --> 00:01:08,673 That was the best Christmas ever. 16 00:01:10,947 --> 00:01:13,202 Ah, the Tunnel of Love. 17 00:01:13,206 --> 00:01:15,681 Nothing gets a woman in your arms faster 18 00:01:15,685 --> 00:01:18,452 than scary robots and simulated privacy. 19 00:01:33,498 --> 00:01:34,670 Marge! Look over there! 20 00:01:39,846 --> 00:01:41,203 Mom and Dad are in there. 21 00:01:41,205 --> 00:01:42,221 Want to ruin their fun? 22 00:01:42,226 --> 00:01:44,622 Bart, no, it's Valentine's Day. 23 00:01:44,626 --> 00:01:45,470 Okay... 24 00:01:45,478 --> 00:01:47,002 but if Dad kisses Mom too much, 25 00:01:47,007 --> 00:01:48,710 a stork will lay an angel egg in her tummy, 26 00:01:48,718 --> 00:01:49,831 and the next thing you know, 27 00:01:49,836 --> 00:01:51,832 we find a baby brother in the cabbage patch! 28 00:01:51,835 --> 00:01:53,021 Here's a thumbnail sketch: 29 00:01:54,536 --> 00:01:56,330 In the first place, you... 30 00:01:56,455 --> 00:01:57,682 Do whatever you want. 31 00:01:57,687 --> 00:01:59,193 I'm getting a candy apple. 32 00:02:18,625 --> 00:02:20,461 Due to a classic Jell-O prank, 33 00:02:20,468 --> 00:02:22,220 this ride has been disabled. 34 00:02:24,297 --> 00:02:26,231 Please remain in your boats. 35 00:02:26,276 --> 00:02:27,872 You will be charged for the extra time. 36 00:02:29,886 --> 00:02:32,763 This is a terrible Valentine's Day. 37 00:02:32,765 --> 00:02:34,602 What if I told you some of the greatest 38 00:02:34,606 --> 00:02:36,591 love stories of all time? 39 00:02:38,556 --> 00:02:39,742 "Romeo and Juliet"? 40 00:02:39,777 --> 00:02:40,933 "Arthur and Guinevere"? 41 00:02:40,957 --> 00:02:41,981 Brangelina? 42 00:02:43,856 --> 00:02:46,193 Even better, a tale of... 43 00:02:46,197 --> 00:02:47,122 One moment. 44 00:02:48,795 --> 00:02:53,403 A tale of two young outlaws in love. 45 00:02:53,687 --> 00:02:56,443 They were the Bonnie and Clyde of their day. 46 00:02:56,446 --> 00:02:59,053 Their names were Bonnie and Clyde. 47 00:02:59,118 --> 00:03:00,253 Miss Bonnie, 48 00:03:00,257 --> 00:03:02,912 might I escort you to the picture show? 49 00:03:02,917 --> 00:03:04,982 I swear I won't misbehave. 50 00:03:04,985 --> 00:03:06,400 Then no, thank you. 51 00:03:06,406 --> 00:03:07,922 This is Texas, 52 00:03:07,925 --> 00:03:10,341 future home of Akeem Olajuwon! 53 00:03:10,345 --> 00:03:12,612 And I've got dreams as big as he will be. 54 00:03:12,618 --> 00:03:14,091 I want action! 55 00:03:14,896 --> 00:03:16,311 Action, eh? 56 00:03:18,446 --> 00:03:19,650 Clyde Barrow, 57 00:03:19,656 --> 00:03:21,032 local bad boy. 58 00:03:21,037 --> 00:03:22,251 Bonnie Parker. 59 00:03:22,255 --> 00:03:24,261 Say, if you're so bad, 60 00:03:24,268 --> 00:03:27,920 you could go stick up that feed store over yonder. 61 00:03:28,637 --> 00:03:29,471 Hmm. 62 00:03:29,485 --> 00:03:30,820 Unless... 63 00:03:30,826 --> 00:03:32,541 you're chicken. 64 00:03:32,545 --> 00:03:34,451 No one calls me "chicken" without 65 00:03:34,457 --> 00:03:36,800 goading me into doing something stupid! 66 00:03:43,307 --> 00:03:44,251 Ya idjit! 67 00:03:44,255 --> 00:03:46,570 You could've had anything you want for free! 68 00:03:46,585 --> 00:03:48,432 You're a co-owner! 69 00:03:48,515 --> 00:03:50,773 I'll see you at Thanksgiving! 70 00:03:54,918 --> 00:03:55,692 Oats! 71 00:03:55,705 --> 00:03:58,022 Texas caviar! 72 00:04:01,225 --> 00:04:02,512 Good times. 73 00:04:04,686 --> 00:04:07,192 Finally. Some excitement. 74 00:04:07,197 --> 00:04:10,520 Wow, I guess violence is her only turn-on. 75 00:04:10,526 --> 00:04:11,502 Well, there might be others, 76 00:04:11,505 --> 00:04:13,232 but I'm too lazy to figure out what they are. 77 00:04:13,238 --> 00:04:14,611 So violence it is! 78 00:04:15,246 --> 00:04:18,372 Oh, there's somethin' this kissin' is missin'. 79 00:04:23,466 --> 00:04:26,590 Oh, Clyde, you know just what a girl likes. 80 00:04:31,105 --> 00:04:32,432 Why are you shooting at us? 81 00:04:32,438 --> 00:04:33,780 We cooperated fully! 82 00:04:33,786 --> 00:04:34,952 It's a sex thing! 83 00:04:34,955 --> 00:04:36,013 Say no more! 84 00:04:37,436 --> 00:04:38,941 Hey, can I give you folks a lift? 85 00:04:38,947 --> 00:04:41,623 Yes, to a series of banks, up and down the state. 86 00:04:41,627 --> 00:04:42,203 Banks? 87 00:04:42,207 --> 00:04:44,051 Well, deposit yourselves in a seat 88 00:04:44,058 --> 00:04:45,632 because you've earned my interest! 89 00:04:51,308 --> 00:04:52,470 Dateline: Texas. 90 00:04:52,485 --> 00:04:55,982 A nation, crippled by unemployment and bored by Seabiscuit, 91 00:04:55,988 --> 00:04:58,752 embraces two unlikely folk heroes. 92 00:05:00,008 --> 00:05:03,861 Bonnie and Clyde souvenirs are flying off the shelves, 93 00:05:03,868 --> 00:05:07,753 and the Dust Bowl duo has inspired their own radio show. 94 00:05:07,755 --> 00:05:10,302 Uh, Bonnie, where did you put the money we stole? 95 00:05:10,306 --> 00:05:11,642 I filed it under "G." 96 00:05:11,648 --> 00:05:12,522 Under "G"? 97 00:05:12,526 --> 00:05:14,102 Why would you file it under "G"? 98 00:05:14,106 --> 00:05:16,512 Because gee, it's swell to have all that money. 99 00:05:16,518 --> 00:05:17,202 I see. 100 00:05:18,258 --> 00:05:21,840 Their notoriety has reached the highest levels of government 101 00:05:21,848 --> 00:05:24,690 To deal with the menace of Bonnie and Clyde, 102 00:05:24,697 --> 00:05:29,461 I am recalling all our air defense forces from Pearl Harbor. 103 00:05:30,467 --> 00:05:33,601 Somebody please remind me to move them back. 104 00:05:33,606 --> 00:05:37,053 I would be honored to perform that duty. 105 00:05:37,078 --> 00:05:38,560 They're outlaws?! 106 00:05:38,597 --> 00:05:40,811 I've been played like a pair of spoons! 107 00:05:40,818 --> 00:05:42,260 Well, who am I to judge? 108 00:05:42,266 --> 00:05:44,240 It's the Depression, money's tight... 109 00:05:44,247 --> 00:05:46,751 Anyone who sees this unmarried couple should... 110 00:05:46,755 --> 00:05:47,761 Unmarried?! 111 00:05:47,767 --> 00:05:49,573 That's it. I'm turning them in. 112 00:05:49,575 --> 00:05:50,953 Hey, keep it down, will ya? 113 00:05:50,958 --> 00:05:53,120 The part where all my men get killed is coming up. 114 00:05:53,125 --> 00:05:56,173 Listen, Sheriff, I can help you take down Bonnie and Clyde. 115 00:05:56,197 --> 00:05:58,933 After the racially insensitive cartoon. 116 00:06:02,727 --> 00:06:04,670 One taco coming up. 117 00:06:17,815 --> 00:06:19,383 Even I'm offended by this, 118 00:06:19,386 --> 00:06:21,542 and I'm a fat Southern sheriff. 119 00:06:24,297 --> 00:06:25,083 Um... 120 00:06:25,095 --> 00:06:26,683 the battery seems to be dead. 121 00:06:26,697 --> 00:06:29,393 I'll get some help by hiding in that bush. 122 00:06:29,978 --> 00:06:31,993 Come on, shoot! Shoot! 123 00:06:32,096 --> 00:06:33,992 Oh! Not me! 124 00:06:36,645 --> 00:06:38,111 Bonnie, I love you. 125 00:06:38,116 --> 00:06:39,031 Will you marry me? 126 00:06:39,038 --> 00:06:40,270 I don't know. 127 00:06:40,275 --> 00:06:42,892 I guess I'm just looking for a little more excitement. 128 00:06:42,898 --> 00:06:46,182 Okay, but if you change your mind, you know where I'm at. 129 00:06:46,195 --> 00:06:48,780 Mm, I think we should see other people. 130 00:06:48,787 --> 00:06:50,270 Say, Officer, 131 00:06:50,278 --> 00:06:52,300 I like how you handle that gun. 132 00:06:52,338 --> 00:06:52,992 Thanks. 133 00:06:53,088 --> 00:06:55,190 I like the way you take a bullet. 134 00:06:55,358 --> 00:06:57,392 Hey, back off! She's my girl! 135 00:06:57,396 --> 00:06:59,300 Damn, just my luck! 136 00:07:01,735 --> 00:07:03,593 Cool. Now we're shooting the birds 137 00:07:03,598 --> 00:07:05,282 that are pecking at the bodies. 138 00:07:12,527 --> 00:07:14,200 So that's the end of the story, huh? 139 00:07:14,205 --> 00:07:15,182 You'd think so, but... 140 00:07:19,966 --> 00:07:21,540 We want to hear a story. 141 00:07:21,547 --> 00:07:23,483 A story suitable for children. 142 00:07:23,497 --> 00:07:24,191 All right. 143 00:07:24,208 --> 00:07:27,940 This is a story of two dogs with a love so strong, 144 00:07:27,944 --> 00:07:30,136 no hose could separate them. 145 00:07:30,131 --> 00:07:32,640 I call it Shady and the Vamp. 146 00:07:42,226 --> 00:07:44,593 She's so beautiful. 147 00:07:44,599 --> 00:07:47,752 Imagine what she looks like with her collar off. 148 00:07:47,756 --> 00:07:50,912 A mutt like you could never get a fancy dame like that. 149 00:07:50,917 --> 00:07:53,193 Even her fleas have more class than you. 150 00:07:54,546 --> 00:07:59,661 Lady Bitington, will you be summering in the hindquarters again this year? 151 00:07:59,747 --> 00:08:00,823 Oh, no! 152 00:08:00,827 --> 00:08:03,952 Chompy and I have taken a cottage in West Leg. 153 00:08:03,957 --> 00:08:06,722 It's where all the fleas are fleeing. 154 00:08:08,548 --> 00:08:10,802 Watch and learn. 155 00:08:16,916 --> 00:08:20,482 You know, heaven must have left its doggie door open 156 00:08:20,486 --> 00:08:22,762 because you are one... 157 00:08:27,295 --> 00:08:30,921 Oh, you poor thing! 158 00:08:34,428 --> 00:08:36,122 Is there anything I can do? 159 00:08:36,136 --> 00:08:38,521 You can have dinner with me. 160 00:08:38,645 --> 00:08:39,900 All right. 161 00:08:39,908 --> 00:08:41,650 But keep your nose where I can see it. 162 00:08:41,657 --> 00:08:43,071 Can you bring a friend for me? 163 00:08:43,078 --> 00:08:45,203 I like those chicks with them head cones 164 00:08:45,207 --> 00:08:48,023 when they start talking, you can drop below the horizon. 165 00:08:58,326 --> 00:09:00,733 Oh, Shady, you on a date, huh? 166 00:09:00,737 --> 00:09:02,073 How's it-a goin'? 167 00:09:02,818 --> 00:09:05,362 You say it's goin' kinda-a rough? 168 00:09:05,367 --> 00:09:07,550 That is precisely what I'm saying. 169 00:09:07,557 --> 00:09:08,843 Sit down. Sit down. 170 00:09:08,848 --> 00:09:11,251 I bring-a you a nice-a bowl of Chianti. 171 00:09:25,916 --> 00:09:27,412 Let go! Let go! 172 00:09:27,417 --> 00:09:30,140 No. You let go of the spaghetti! 173 00:09:35,228 --> 00:09:38,412 You're pretty feisty for an upper-class bitch. 174 00:09:39,105 --> 00:09:43,043 Oh, I like that you use the technical termfor a female dog. 175 00:09:43,045 --> 00:09:44,080 Run, run! 176 00:09:44,086 --> 00:09:47,163 The health inspector man, he's-a here! 177 00:09:49,127 --> 00:09:51,521 Why didn't I listen to Mama? 178 00:09:51,528 --> 00:09:54,131 "Serve-a food to humans!" 179 00:09:57,577 --> 00:10:00,780 I have to admit, that was exciting. 180 00:10:00,786 --> 00:10:03,022 And I am in heat. 181 00:10:03,027 --> 00:10:04,411 That's the safe time, right? 182 00:10:04,416 --> 00:10:06,091 Oh, the safest. 183 00:10:15,827 --> 00:10:17,761 That was the most... 184 00:10:17,767 --> 00:10:20,852 wonderful night of my life. 185 00:10:21,375 --> 00:10:22,390 That's odd. 186 00:10:22,396 --> 00:10:24,020 I'm never sickin the morning. 187 00:10:24,027 --> 00:10:25,162 What could it be? 188 00:10:25,168 --> 00:10:25,971 Oh, uh... 189 00:10:25,985 --> 00:10:27,830 Is that a foxhunt I hear? 190 00:10:33,348 --> 00:10:35,230 Shady! 191 00:10:37,316 --> 00:10:40,270 I haven't seen Shady in weeks. 192 00:10:43,797 --> 00:10:45,610 Any minute now 193 00:10:45,756 --> 00:10:49,592 He'll scamper through that doggie door 194 00:10:49,595 --> 00:10:51,270 Any minute now 195 00:10:51,505 --> 00:10:55,252 I'll be the dog she's lookin' for 196 00:10:55,306 --> 00:10:57,243 Any minute now 197 00:10:57,327 --> 00:11:00,823 You'll be stuck with her brood 198 00:11:01,126 --> 00:11:02,722 Any minute now 199 00:11:02,956 --> 00:11:07,542 This pooch will know she's screwed 200 00:11:08,726 --> 00:11:12,451 My heart tells me to trust him 201 00:11:12,535 --> 00:11:16,691 But your head knows he's a hound 202 00:11:16,708 --> 00:11:19,763 I want to do the right thing 203 00:11:19,767 --> 00:11:23,701 Come on, with all this high-class tail around? 204 00:11:24,428 --> 00:11:26,442 Any minute now 205 00:11:26,448 --> 00:11:30,390 Our girl will make a brand-new start 206 00:11:30,447 --> 00:11:31,932 Yesss! 207 00:11:31,997 --> 00:11:34,122 Any minute now 208 00:11:34,125 --> 00:11:38,533 I won't care that he broke my heart 209 00:11:38,648 --> 00:11:45,340 Any minute now. 210 00:11:49,645 --> 00:11:51,471 - Where's our dad? - We need Daddy! 211 00:11:51,475 --> 00:11:53,200 - I want to go find Daddy! - Where's Daddy?! 212 00:11:53,205 --> 00:11:55,620 I don't wanna hear another word about your father. 213 00:12:08,255 --> 00:12:10,130 We gotta find our daddy. 214 00:12:10,205 --> 00:12:12,280 Yeah, he's gotta teach me how to lick my... 215 00:12:12,376 --> 00:12:13,961 Oh, I figured it out. 216 00:12:13,967 --> 00:12:14,812 You go ahead. 217 00:12:14,818 --> 00:12:15,920 Come on! 218 00:12:16,025 --> 00:12:17,733 - Oh, Shady! - Oh, Shady! 219 00:12:17,768 --> 00:12:19,482 - Shady! - Shady! 220 00:12:19,537 --> 00:12:21,350 - Daddy! - Daddy! 221 00:12:21,355 --> 00:12:23,852 - We need you, Daddy! - Daddy! 222 00:12:26,137 --> 00:12:27,401 Ah, got ya! 223 00:12:27,406 --> 00:12:30,221 You strays are going straight to the pound 224 00:12:30,228 --> 00:12:32,960 where you're put to sleep... 225 00:12:32,967 --> 00:12:35,532 by my boring stories. 226 00:12:35,586 --> 00:12:36,770 And then you'll be killed! 227 00:12:41,768 --> 00:12:44,012 Ah, looks like that problem solved it self. 228 00:12:44,018 --> 00:12:47,180 Now, uh, how 'bout you and me sniff each other's butts? 229 00:12:48,737 --> 00:12:49,680 I'm just kiddin'. 230 00:12:50,288 --> 00:12:51,411 Unless you want to. 231 00:12:55,987 --> 00:12:59,381 Well, Looks like it's just you and me again tonight. 232 00:13:11,648 --> 00:13:13,681 Gawrsh, you can't kill me. 233 00:13:13,687 --> 00:13:15,061 I'm half-human! 234 00:13:15,066 --> 00:13:16,611 Look, I wear clothes! 235 00:13:16,615 --> 00:13:17,870 I speak English! 236 00:13:17,885 --> 00:13:20,022 I'm speaking it right now! 237 00:13:20,065 --> 00:13:21,973 Sure you are. 238 00:13:29,806 --> 00:13:31,753 You two are next. 239 00:13:31,765 --> 00:13:33,400 Here's your last meal. 240 00:13:33,405 --> 00:13:34,822 It's Cycle 5, 241 00:13:34,825 --> 00:13:38,730 specially formulated for dogs with five minutes to live. 242 00:13:41,538 --> 00:13:43,543 Don't bite the hand that kills ye! 243 00:13:47,268 --> 00:13:48,431 Yay, Dad! 244 00:13:48,438 --> 00:13:50,400 I knew you'd come save us! 245 00:13:50,766 --> 00:13:52,211 You two are going home, 246 00:13:52,217 --> 00:13:53,911 and I'm coming with ya! 247 00:13:58,147 --> 00:13:59,971 This place is no picnic, 248 00:13:59,977 --> 00:14:02,550 but it sure beats working for Disney. 249 00:14:11,757 --> 00:14:13,331 Look who we found! 250 00:14:13,335 --> 00:14:14,771 Can I keep him? Can we keep him? 251 00:14:14,776 --> 00:14:16,461 Well, that depends. 252 00:14:16,466 --> 00:14:18,171 Does he want to stay? 253 00:14:18,176 --> 00:14:22,030 I want to stay, sit, roll over and beg! 254 00:14:22,035 --> 00:14:24,841 Please, please, please, please, please, please, please...! 255 00:14:24,846 --> 00:14:28,003 All right, we can be a family. 256 00:14:29,168 --> 00:14:30,882 All four of us. 257 00:14:30,895 --> 00:14:32,742 Uh... you know, 258 00:14:32,748 --> 00:14:35,141 there are nine other puppies. 259 00:14:45,265 --> 00:14:49,101 Even love is boring when you're stuck in a tunnel of it. 260 00:14:49,105 --> 00:14:50,852 Well, I've got a Valentine's Day story! 261 00:14:50,856 --> 00:14:53,222 It's about musicians from a simpler time. 262 00:14:53,228 --> 00:14:57,081 The era of The Brady Bunch, Donny and Marie and... 263 00:14:58,527 --> 00:15:00,310 Smash the flag 264 00:15:00,348 --> 00:15:02,201 Burn the queen 265 00:15:02,228 --> 00:15:03,953 Kick the sky 266 00:15:04,006 --> 00:15:06,233 Antichrist! 267 00:15:09,907 --> 00:15:11,541 Nancy, what are the odds? 268 00:15:11,558 --> 00:15:14,151 You sign up for a semester at U. of London; 269 00:15:14,155 --> 00:15:16,453 then I immediately do the same. 270 00:15:16,457 --> 00:15:18,630 Yeah, I'm really lucky you saved me 271 00:15:18,636 --> 00:15:21,941 from meeting other people and having new experiences. 272 00:15:24,028 --> 00:15:27,052 What is that raw, primo sound? 273 00:15:27,187 --> 00:15:28,570 You can't go in there. 274 00:15:28,576 --> 00:15:30,463 Our guide book says not to! 275 00:15:32,215 --> 00:15:33,793 Hitler and her majesty 276 00:15:33,838 --> 00:15:35,461 Sittin' in a tree 277 00:15:35,567 --> 00:15:38,961 B-O-R-R-I-N-G! 278 00:15:38,966 --> 00:15:40,750 You rule, Sid Vicious! 279 00:15:40,757 --> 00:15:42,141 You sicken me! 280 00:15:45,267 --> 00:15:46,950 Why am I hittin' myself? 281 00:15:47,056 --> 00:15:48,541 Why am I hittin' myself? 282 00:15:48,565 --> 00:15:50,930 He's so uncompromising. 283 00:15:50,948 --> 00:15:54,693 He'd never go for an uncool spelling bee champion like me. 284 00:15:54,696 --> 00:15:56,442 I've spelled "unrequited." 285 00:15:56,447 --> 00:15:58,510 Now I know what it means. 286 00:15:58,548 --> 00:16:00,990 Yo. I got Duds, Chunks, Twix, 287 00:16:00,996 --> 00:16:03,083 Cadbury's, any way you want to go. 288 00:16:03,088 --> 00:16:04,313 Chocolate? 289 00:16:04,527 --> 00:16:07,391 Nancy's too smart to put that in her body. 290 00:16:07,397 --> 00:16:10,572 It's only for losers, like musicians and... 291 00:16:10,587 --> 00:16:11,780 Musicians?! 292 00:16:12,405 --> 00:16:14,333 That's my girlfriend. 293 00:16:14,335 --> 00:16:16,902 Then I guess you'll be paying for her chocolate. 294 00:16:16,906 --> 00:16:18,721 Uh, okay. 295 00:16:18,727 --> 00:16:19,422 Gotcha! 296 00:16:19,428 --> 00:16:21,310 That's nice work, Officer Otto. 297 00:16:21,315 --> 00:16:23,412 Happy to be of service, old bean. 298 00:16:23,435 --> 00:16:25,340 ...cannon, neat, neat, neat 299 00:16:25,347 --> 00:16:27,921 She can't afford a gun at all Neat, neat, neat. 300 00:16:30,218 --> 00:16:33,411 S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y 301 00:16:33,427 --> 00:16:34,061 Night! 302 00:16:34,068 --> 00:16:37,142 S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y 303 00:16:37,148 --> 00:16:37,771 Night! 304 00:16:37,775 --> 00:16:40,651 S-A-T-U-R-D-A-Y 305 00:16:40,687 --> 00:16:41,251 Night! 306 00:16:48,638 --> 00:16:51,242 Look, an American nerd bird. 307 00:16:51,245 --> 00:16:52,283 Nerd bird? 308 00:16:52,327 --> 00:16:54,420 Would a nerd bird have chocolate, huh? 309 00:16:54,425 --> 00:16:55,793 Would a nerd bird? 310 00:16:55,798 --> 00:16:57,321 Stop saying "nerd bird!" 311 00:16:57,327 --> 00:16:58,813 Chocolate is boring. 312 00:16:58,816 --> 00:17:00,542 Maybe I'll have a piece. 313 00:17:00,546 --> 00:17:03,900 You know, just to see how boring it is. 314 00:17:07,945 --> 00:17:10,021 Oh, you're offering me some? 315 00:17:10,026 --> 00:17:11,902 Um... I guess I could. 316 00:17:11,908 --> 00:17:14,053 I mean, I do it all the time! 317 00:17:17,957 --> 00:17:19,381 - Oh! - Oh! 318 00:17:20,725 --> 00:17:23,063 Yup, it's boring all right. 319 00:17:23,076 --> 00:17:24,292 How much more you got? 320 00:17:24,346 --> 00:17:25,212 Lots. 321 00:17:25,396 --> 00:17:27,721 Ever fallen in love with someone? 322 00:17:27,728 --> 00:17:30,472 Ever fallen in love In love with someone 323 00:17:30,485 --> 00:17:32,970 Ever fallen in love In love with someone 324 00:17:32,977 --> 00:17:35,022 You shouldn't've fallen in love with? 325 00:17:36,386 --> 00:17:38,731 I can't see much of a future 326 00:17:39,196 --> 00:17:41,632 Unless we find out what's to blame 327 00:17:41,635 --> 00:17:43,190 What a shame 328 00:17:47,136 --> 00:17:49,590 And we won't be together much longer 329 00:17:49,917 --> 00:17:53,852 Unless we realize that we are the same 330 00:17:57,697 --> 00:17:59,872 Ever fallen in love with someone 331 00:17:59,878 --> 00:18:02,543 Ever fallen in love In love with someone 332 00:18:02,546 --> 00:18:05,291 Ever fallen in love In love with someone 333 00:18:05,296 --> 00:18:08,100 You shouldn't've fallen in love with? 334 00:18:12,617 --> 00:18:15,330 We're gonna go out and play our songs 335 00:18:15,335 --> 00:18:18,263 like we've never played them before: competently! 336 00:18:19,266 --> 00:18:20,423 Where's Sid? 337 00:18:22,206 --> 00:18:24,201 Sidney Sheldon Vicious! 338 00:18:24,205 --> 00:18:26,750 Where you been, chompin' Wonka? 339 00:18:29,496 --> 00:18:32,300 When I hired a guy named Sid Vicious, 340 00:18:32,306 --> 00:18:35,571 I assumed it would be a 30-year business relationship. 341 00:18:35,585 --> 00:18:38,721 I told you to hire Tom Responsible. 342 00:18:38,726 --> 00:18:40,043 Slag off. 343 00:18:40,535 --> 00:18:43,643 Here they are, all the way from outside of Texas: 344 00:18:43,648 --> 00:18:45,652 the Sex Pistols. 345 00:18:48,657 --> 00:18:50,522 Education's bollocks! 346 00:18:51,058 --> 00:18:53,901 Bollocks! America is bollocks! 347 00:18:54,145 --> 00:18:56,873 Bollocks! Politeness is bollocks! 348 00:18:57,286 --> 00:18:59,403 Bollocks! Bollocks! 349 00:19:00,306 --> 00:19:02,150 Can't reach me bass. 350 00:19:02,175 --> 00:19:03,921 Me back is front ward! 351 00:19:10,107 --> 00:19:13,891 Dang it, I wanted to hear what else was bollocks! 352 00:19:17,965 --> 00:19:20,601 You gobbed up our gig, you git! 353 00:19:22,446 --> 00:19:25,512 You leave Sid alone! He doesn't need you! 354 00:19:25,518 --> 00:19:27,422 He's quitting the band! 355 00:19:27,428 --> 00:19:28,811 I'm doing what now? 356 00:19:28,818 --> 00:19:30,071 You're quitting the band. 357 00:19:30,078 --> 00:19:32,690 He's going solo, and I'm gonna write his songs! 358 00:19:32,697 --> 00:19:33,540 Yeah! 359 00:19:33,555 --> 00:19:35,720 Hey, you guys want to be in my new band? 360 00:19:35,726 --> 00:19:37,740 Ho!! Just stop talking 361 00:19:37,745 --> 00:19:40,071 and bang your head against the wall! 362 00:19:41,057 --> 00:19:42,782 I'm doing this 'cause I want to, 363 00:19:42,785 --> 00:19:44,301 not 'cause she told me to. 364 00:19:44,308 --> 00:19:45,673 Bang harder! 365 00:19:45,677 --> 00:19:46,303 Yes, pet. 366 00:19:50,687 --> 00:19:53,351 'Cause love is the elixir 367 00:19:53,355 --> 00:19:56,001 The potion of emotion 368 00:19:56,108 --> 00:19:58,543 The world-saving fixer 369 00:19:58,546 --> 00:20:01,380 The lotion of devotion. 370 00:20:01,466 --> 00:20:03,831 This song doesn't make me feel angry at all. 371 00:20:03,838 --> 00:20:06,641 If anything, it makes my anger ebb! 372 00:20:08,467 --> 00:20:11,313 Your music violates everything punk stands for, 373 00:20:11,326 --> 00:20:12,300 which is nothing! 374 00:20:12,318 --> 00:20:14,341 You are no longer welcome at CBGB's... 375 00:20:14,347 --> 00:20:16,301 Comic Book Guy's Bar 376 00:20:16,307 --> 00:20:17,972 Oh, forget those jerks. 377 00:20:17,978 --> 00:20:20,973 Let's go back to the hotel and get Snicker-faced. 378 00:20:20,977 --> 00:20:24,191 Oh, I love you, my Hershey hero. 379 00:20:24,197 --> 00:20:26,682 And I love you, Tootsie Roll. 380 00:20:37,138 --> 00:20:39,293 Happy Valentine's Day 381 00:20:39,305 --> 00:20:41,262 and shut your gob.