1
00:00:04,510 --> 00:00:07,147
MRS. GUMBLE:
Barney, did you
finish your milk?
2
00:00:07,147 --> 00:00:08,985
Yes, Ma.
(burps)
3
00:00:08,985 --> 00:00:11,657
MRS. GUMBLE:
Have fun playing in the gutter!
4
00:00:11,657 --> 00:00:13,493
BARNEY:
Anchors aweigh!
5
00:00:13,493 --> 00:00:15,497
(laughing)
6
00:00:15,497 --> 00:00:16,534
It's floating.
7
00:00:16,534 --> 00:00:17,903
It's still floating!
8
00:00:17,903 --> 00:00:21,309
This is fun to me.
I love you, paper boat!
9
00:00:21,309 --> 00:00:22,579
(laughs)
10
00:00:22,579 --> 00:00:23,681
Oh, no!
11
00:00:23,681 --> 00:00:25,484
Aw...
12
00:00:26,119 --> 00:00:27,989
-Hiya, Barn.
-(gasps)
13
00:00:27,989 --> 00:00:30,093
I'm Krusto, the funniest clown
14
00:00:30,093 --> 00:00:31,964
in the whole wide world.
15
00:00:31,964 --> 00:00:35,505
Uh, people who have to tell you
they're funny usually aren't.
16
00:00:35,505 --> 00:00:37,776
Can I get my boat back,
sewer clown?
17
00:00:37,776 --> 00:00:39,078
Why, sure.
18
00:00:39,078 --> 00:00:42,284
Just reach in and take it.
19
00:00:43,086 --> 00:00:45,390
Hmm.
(straining)
20
00:00:45,390 --> 00:00:49,031
That's right, build the tension.
21
00:00:49,031 --> 00:00:50,602
(growls)
22
00:00:50,602 --> 00:00:51,870
BARNEY: Aah!
23
00:00:51,870 --> 00:00:54,008
Keep the boat!
Keep the boat!
24
00:00:54,008 --> 00:00:57,481
Ow! Ow!
(screaming)
25
00:00:57,481 --> 00:00:59,485
♪
26
00:01:13,614 --> 00:01:15,083
Don't worry, Barn.
27
00:01:15,083 --> 00:01:18,423
When a kid goes missing in this
town, we find them.
28
00:01:19,425 --> 00:01:21,296
Hmm... Mm...
29
00:01:22,097 --> 00:01:23,501
Sorry, Waylon.
30
00:01:23,501 --> 00:01:24,770
Hey there, Ruthie.
31
00:01:24,770 --> 00:01:26,306
How are the little ones?
32
00:01:26,306 --> 00:01:29,145
Oh, you know kids.
Still missin.'
33
00:01:29,145 --> 00:01:31,850
Ah, they disappear
so fast, don't they?
34
00:01:31,850 --> 00:01:33,521
(chuckles)
35
00:01:35,057 --> 00:01:37,361
♪
36
00:01:39,866 --> 00:01:41,035
(grunting)
37
00:01:41,035 --> 00:01:42,872
(laughing)
38
00:01:42,872 --> 00:01:44,977
Hey there, Simpson.
39
00:01:44,977 --> 00:01:47,314
Super-Intense-Kid Chalmers!
40
00:01:47,314 --> 00:01:50,153
Look what I traded my dog for.
41
00:01:50,153 --> 00:01:52,358
-(yelps)
-(cackles)
42
00:01:53,326 --> 00:01:54,362
Huh?
43
00:01:56,199 --> 00:01:59,005
Creepy clown, go get help!
44
00:01:59,005 --> 00:02:00,474
-Hmm?
-Hmm?
-Hmm?
45
00:02:00,474 --> 00:02:01,877
(grunting)
46
00:02:04,516 --> 00:02:06,920
After him!
47
00:02:06,920 --> 00:02:09,291
(grunting)
48
00:02:16,907 --> 00:02:19,445
Step away from
the whimpering coward.
49
00:02:19,445 --> 00:02:20,515
(grunting)
50
00:02:24,121 --> 00:02:27,595
Time to bring out the big guns.
51
00:02:30,668 --> 00:02:32,171
(grunting)
52
00:02:33,641 --> 00:02:35,344
Aah! (groans)
53
00:02:35,344 --> 00:02:36,980
It's a fair fight.
54
00:02:36,980 --> 00:02:38,249
Let's run away!
55
00:02:38,249 --> 00:02:40,588
(all whimpering)
56
00:02:40,588 --> 00:02:42,057
HOMER: Hmm?
57
00:02:42,057 --> 00:02:45,531
Oh, oh, you're hurt,
you poor thing.
58
00:02:45,531 --> 00:02:48,704
No girl has ever
called me a "thing" before.
59
00:02:48,704 --> 00:02:50,240
I've seen you guys around.
60
00:02:50,240 --> 00:02:52,277
You're the school outsiders,
aren't you?
61
00:02:52,277 --> 00:02:55,718
We sure are.
The comic book nerd, the tomboy.
62
00:02:55,718 --> 00:02:57,154
The scuzz.
63
00:02:57,154 --> 00:02:59,392
And the one Black kid
in all of Maine.
64
00:02:59,392 --> 00:03:01,630
We call ourselves
The Losers Club.
65
00:03:01,630 --> 00:03:04,603
It's a name we are
no longer fighting.
66
00:03:04,603 --> 00:03:05,805
Ooh.
67
00:03:05,805 --> 00:03:09,713
We have a first aid kit
in our clubhouse. Come on.
68
00:03:11,015 --> 00:03:13,153
Um, FYI, new guy.
69
00:03:13,153 --> 00:03:15,558
I called dibs on Marge
in the second grade.
70
00:03:15,558 --> 00:03:17,227
Find your own secret knockout
71
00:03:17,227 --> 00:03:20,635
who doesn't recognize
her own self-worth. (grunts)
72
00:03:22,939 --> 00:03:24,543
Sweet clubhouse, right?
73
00:03:24,543 --> 00:03:27,549
They used it to store
tartar sauce during the war.
74
00:03:27,549 --> 00:03:29,686
You're all gonna
think I'm crazy,
75
00:03:29,686 --> 00:03:32,257
but when those bullies
were gonna kill me,
76
00:03:32,257 --> 00:03:35,330
I saw an evil clown.
77
00:03:35,330 --> 00:03:38,169
I-I've seen the clown, too.
78
00:03:38,169 --> 00:03:41,610
I was in the bathroom,
uh, painting my nails...
79
00:03:42,377 --> 00:03:44,181
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow,
ow, ow, ow, ow!
80
00:03:44,181 --> 00:03:46,052
(timer dings)
81
00:03:46,052 --> 00:03:47,287
Hmm? (grunts)
82
00:03:47,287 --> 00:03:49,893
Come on, I need water.
83
00:03:49,893 --> 00:03:51,195
CLOWN:
How's about...
84
00:03:51,195 --> 00:03:53,199
a little seltzer?
85
00:03:53,199 --> 00:03:55,370
Aah!
86
00:03:56,573 --> 00:03:58,778
(whimpers)
87
00:03:58,778 --> 00:03:59,913
Help!
88
00:03:59,913 --> 00:04:02,317
He...
89
00:04:03,186 --> 00:04:05,625
(panting)
90
00:04:06,225 --> 00:04:08,163
-(burps)
-Holy moly,
91
00:04:08,163 --> 00:04:09,566
bleach your mustache.
92
00:04:09,566 --> 00:04:11,804
You look like El DeBarge.
93
00:04:13,306 --> 00:04:16,045
The clown knew my greatest fear:
94
00:04:16,045 --> 00:04:18,918
drowning in seltzer.
95
00:04:18,918 --> 00:04:21,255
-HOMER: Mm.
-(clears throat)
96
00:04:21,255 --> 00:04:22,725
I saw the clown, too.
97
00:04:22,725 --> 00:04:26,365
But he came to me
as a ventriloquist dummy.
98
00:04:26,365 --> 00:04:28,871
-Hey, kid.
-Hmm?
99
00:04:28,871 --> 00:04:31,944
I went on a date
with your mother last night.
100
00:04:32,946 --> 00:04:34,281
(whimpers)
101
00:04:34,281 --> 00:04:36,285
You might want to check her
for splinters!
102
00:04:36,285 --> 00:04:38,456
(cackles)
103
00:04:38,456 --> 00:04:41,262
He was implying they made love.
104
00:04:41,262 --> 00:04:44,034
I was in my bedroom, reading.
105
00:04:47,040 --> 00:04:49,613
Wanna swap spit?
106
00:04:49,613 --> 00:04:51,617
Aah!
107
00:04:52,384 --> 00:04:53,854
-(cackles)
-Aah!
108
00:04:53,854 --> 00:04:55,390
I saw him too.
109
00:04:55,390 --> 00:04:58,631
He came to me as the rotting
corpse of my grandmother
110
00:04:58,631 --> 00:05:00,635
in a hot tub full of maggots.
111
00:05:01,269 --> 00:05:03,406
We get it, we get it,
no need for a flashback.
112
00:05:03,406 --> 00:05:05,343
I bet that evil clown is the one
113
00:05:05,343 --> 00:05:07,481
who took all the missing kids
in town.
114
00:05:07,481 --> 00:05:10,253
We need to find out
what we're up against.
115
00:05:10,253 --> 00:05:13,794
Which means doing the thing
we all fear most:
116
00:05:13,794 --> 00:05:15,030
-homework.
-Aah!
117
00:05:15,030 --> 00:05:17,569
-Oh God, no.
-But it's summer.
118
00:05:24,816 --> 00:05:26,887
HOMER:
Your arm is summer lightning.
119
00:05:26,887 --> 00:05:28,791
Your bravery, the storm.
120
00:05:28,791 --> 00:05:30,427
Hmm. (gasps)
121
00:05:30,427 --> 00:05:33,868
Like a chimp at the zoo,
I'm bananas for you.
122
00:05:39,846 --> 00:05:41,015
MARGE:
Homer!
123
00:05:41,015 --> 00:05:44,021
Homer, I found him.
In this.
124
00:05:47,862 --> 00:05:50,433
The clown has been
in Kingfield before.
125
00:05:50,433 --> 00:05:52,972
He's always been here.
126
00:05:52,972 --> 00:05:54,709
BROCKMAN:
Channel 14 and Fume Champ
127
00:05:54,709 --> 00:05:57,180
Super-Leaded Gasoline present
128
00:05:57,180 --> 00:06:00,621
The Yuk-Yuk Hour
with Krusto the Clown.
129
00:06:00,621 --> 00:06:02,792
-(applause)
-(kids cheering)
130
00:06:02,792 --> 00:06:04,161
Hey, hey!
131
00:06:04,161 --> 00:06:07,134
Thanks for the big hand.
132
00:06:07,134 --> 00:06:08,604
(audience laughs)
133
00:06:08,604 --> 00:06:12,144
In 1936 he had a radio hour.
134
00:06:12,144 --> 00:06:14,448
In 1909, a vaudeville review.
135
00:06:14,448 --> 00:06:17,689
And in 1882, he was
an emcee for a freak show.
136
00:06:17,689 --> 00:06:19,593
And the strangest thing is...
137
00:06:19,593 --> 00:06:23,199
He was never, ever funny.
138
00:06:23,199 --> 00:06:25,838
He comes back every 27 years.
139
00:06:25,838 --> 00:06:27,241
And when he does...
140
00:06:27,241 --> 00:06:29,746
I gorge myself on pre-teens.
141
00:06:29,746 --> 00:06:30,781
ALL:
Aah!
142
00:06:30,781 --> 00:06:32,619
(laughs)
143
00:06:37,394 --> 00:06:39,365
Aah! Oh. (grunting)
144
00:06:39,365 --> 00:06:41,536
(kids whimper, scream)
145
00:06:44,509 --> 00:06:47,849
What's the difference
between a Twinkie and a fat kid?
146
00:06:47,849 --> 00:06:51,122
I don't feel guilty
when I eat a fat kid.
147
00:06:51,122 --> 00:06:53,560
(children laughing)
148
00:06:54,194 --> 00:06:56,499
Ah...
149
00:06:57,502 --> 00:06:59,806
Homer, catch!
150
00:07:00,975 --> 00:07:02,545
Gah! My wattle!
151
00:07:02,545 --> 00:07:04,716
My beautiful wattle!
152
00:07:04,716 --> 00:07:08,156
Now I'm really big and scary!
153
00:07:08,156 --> 00:07:09,693
(gasps)
154
00:07:11,095 --> 00:07:14,134
Temporary setba...
155
00:07:14,134 --> 00:07:16,740
I don't want to die
and be buried in a kid coffin.
156
00:07:16,740 --> 00:07:19,445
It costs the same
as a regular-sized.
157
00:07:19,445 --> 00:07:22,484
I overheard my parents
pricing 'em.
158
00:07:22,484 --> 00:07:24,856
-(sobbing)
-Calm down.
159
00:07:24,856 --> 00:07:27,494
(grunts)
Well, that's my fetish now.
160
00:07:27,494 --> 00:07:28,897
Look, don't you see?
161
00:07:28,897 --> 00:07:30,300
We hurt him.
162
00:07:30,300 --> 00:07:33,239
And if we can hurt him,
we can kill him.
163
00:07:33,239 --> 00:07:34,408
Ooh.
164
00:07:34,408 --> 00:07:36,345
Oh...
165
00:07:36,345 --> 00:07:38,584
♪
166
00:07:45,698 --> 00:07:47,367
Hmm?
167
00:07:47,367 --> 00:07:49,572
(scoffs)
"Bananas for you"?
168
00:07:50,440 --> 00:07:52,010
-HOMER: Mm?
-Oh!
169
00:07:52,010 --> 00:07:53,212
(laughing)
170
00:07:53,212 --> 00:07:54,949
That romantic
son of a bitch.
171
00:07:54,949 --> 00:07:57,855
When she reads this,
she'll be his forever.
172
00:08:01,362 --> 00:08:02,832
(all shudder)
173
00:08:08,209 --> 00:08:10,046
(all gasp)
174
00:08:14,088 --> 00:08:15,524
HOMER:
Free candy?
175
00:08:15,524 --> 00:08:17,494
(gasps) Let's eat it
before the clown shows up!
176
00:08:17,494 --> 00:08:19,599
-(laughs) Aah!
-Aah!
177
00:08:19,599 --> 00:08:21,503
Hey, hey, kids!
178
00:08:21,503 --> 00:08:22,972
What time is it?
179
00:08:22,972 --> 00:08:25,911
CHILDREN:
Time to laugh for Krusto.
180
00:08:25,911 --> 00:08:27,147
Attack!
181
00:08:28,149 --> 00:08:29,586
(exclaims)
182
00:08:29,586 --> 00:08:32,290
Our whimsical weapons--
they're useless.
183
00:08:32,290 --> 00:08:34,395
Don't you kids get it?
184
00:08:34,395 --> 00:08:36,165
I'm completely invinci...
185
00:08:36,165 --> 00:08:38,537
Whoa! (exclaiming)
186
00:08:45,216 --> 00:08:47,187
Aah!
187
00:08:47,187 --> 00:08:49,458
(groans, grunts)
188
00:08:49,458 --> 00:08:51,195
Oh!
189
00:08:51,195 --> 00:08:53,066
(laughing)
190
00:08:54,001 --> 00:08:56,305
Wait, I never
heard that before.
191
00:08:56,305 --> 00:08:59,713
Real laughter.
That I actually earned.
192
00:08:59,713 --> 00:09:02,317
Hey, hey, kids,
if you like that,
193
00:09:02,317 --> 00:09:03,854
watch this.
194
00:09:03,854 --> 00:09:05,524
(exclaiming)
195
00:09:07,294 --> 00:09:08,597
Hot!
196
00:09:08,597 --> 00:09:09,999
(laughing)
197
00:09:12,839 --> 00:09:14,374
Eh? Eh?
198
00:09:14,374 --> 00:09:16,479
He's killing himself
for laughs.
199
00:09:16,479 --> 00:09:18,282
Hey, clown.
200
00:09:18,282 --> 00:09:19,753
Why don't you eat these?
201
00:09:20,654 --> 00:09:23,594
Oh!
Cherry bombs in the mouth.
202
00:09:23,594 --> 00:09:25,163
That's a great gag.
203
00:09:26,165 --> 00:09:27,568
Oh...
204
00:09:28,670 --> 00:09:32,210
So this is what it feels like
not to bomb.
205
00:09:32,210 --> 00:09:33,413
Whoa!
206
00:09:33,413 --> 00:09:34,716
(exclaiming)
207
00:09:36,686 --> 00:09:38,356
No, you tricked me!
208
00:09:39,024 --> 00:09:41,663
You're nothing
but a bunch of losers.
209
00:09:41,663 --> 00:09:43,801
And that's all you'll ever be!
210
00:09:43,801 --> 00:09:45,538
-(gasps)
-(sighs)
211
00:09:45,538 --> 00:09:47,040
We're not dead.
212
00:09:47,040 --> 00:09:48,309
Somebody pinch me.
213
00:09:48,309 --> 00:09:49,546
Somebody slap me.
214
00:09:49,546 --> 00:09:51,850
A-Any one of youse.
Doesn't-doesn't matter.
215
00:09:51,850 --> 00:09:53,720
Guys, let's make a pact:
216
00:09:53,720 --> 00:09:55,891
if the clown comes back
in 27 years,
217
00:09:55,891 --> 00:09:57,227
no matter where we all end up,
218
00:09:57,227 --> 00:10:00,601
we'll come back home
and finish the job.
219
00:10:03,106 --> 00:10:05,811
Now let's find out
if this water is deep enough
220
00:10:05,811 --> 00:10:07,949
-for jumpin'!
-(whooping)
221
00:10:09,251 --> 00:10:10,621
Uh...
222
00:10:11,422 --> 00:10:12,424
-Mwah.
-Huh?
223
00:10:12,424 --> 00:10:14,094
I got your poem.
224
00:10:14,094 --> 00:10:18,604
I want my first love to be
the boy who wrote those words.
225
00:10:18,604 --> 00:10:21,408
B-By that, you mean me,
of course.
226
00:10:21,408 --> 00:10:23,914
Kiss me
for the rest of the summer.
227
00:10:25,851 --> 00:10:28,089
Wait, this isn't right.
228
00:10:28,089 --> 00:10:30,828
I'm the one I wanted Marge
to fall in love with.
229
00:10:30,828 --> 00:10:32,464
Eh, cheer up, Homer.
230
00:10:32,464 --> 00:10:34,569
We got our whole lives
ahead of us.
231
00:10:34,569 --> 00:10:36,372
Maybe you guys do.
232
00:10:36,372 --> 00:10:39,712
I think mine just ended.
233
00:10:39,712 --> 00:10:41,716
Oh, Marge.
Mwah, kissing.
234
00:10:41,716 --> 00:10:43,386
-This.
-I'm so happy.
235
00:10:43,386 --> 00:10:44,789
Oh yes.
(giggling)
236
00:10:51,536 --> 00:10:53,472
-(grunts)
-Hey,
237
00:10:53,472 --> 00:10:56,078
that bakery wasn't here
this morning.
238
00:10:56,847 --> 00:10:59,652
Well, there's no kids around.
239
00:10:59,652 --> 00:11:01,523
Might as well bully adults.
240
00:11:01,523 --> 00:11:03,927
Hey Pie Man!
Gimme a...
241
00:11:03,927 --> 00:11:05,396
(grunts)
242
00:11:05,396 --> 00:11:07,668
Dude, are you okay?
243
00:11:07,668 --> 00:11:09,404
(all screaming)
244
00:11:11,408 --> 00:11:13,647
♪
245
00:11:15,250 --> 00:11:16,520
(Lenny laughs)
246
00:11:16,520 --> 00:11:17,922
Oh, Moleman,
247
00:11:17,922 --> 00:11:20,594
I can't imagine my life
without you seated next to me
248
00:11:20,594 --> 00:11:23,266
every night
here at D'ohs Tavern.
249
00:11:23,266 --> 00:11:24,334
You're my best friend.
250
00:11:24,334 --> 00:11:26,305
I'm cold.
251
00:11:26,305 --> 00:11:27,575
(sighs)
252
00:11:27,575 --> 00:11:29,077
Hmm?
253
00:11:29,077 --> 00:11:31,583
One teen was killed
by a pie to the face.
254
00:11:31,583 --> 00:11:34,154
Another's intestines were
twisted into balloon animals.
255
00:11:34,154 --> 00:11:36,927
And the last, choked by a chain
of hankies so long,
256
00:11:36,927 --> 00:11:38,864
police are still pulling it out.
257
00:11:38,864 --> 00:11:41,368
No, the clown can't be back.
258
00:11:41,368 --> 00:11:43,139
Unless it's...
(gasps)
259
00:11:43,139 --> 00:11:45,611
27 years later.
260
00:11:45,611 --> 00:11:49,251
I got to tell the other Losers
that it's time to come home,
261
00:11:49,251 --> 00:11:50,955
so we can end this.
262
00:11:50,955 --> 00:11:55,496
I wonder if their lives
turned out as lousy as mine.
263
00:11:55,496 --> 00:11:57,568
♪
264
00:11:57,568 --> 00:11:59,839
♪ Here I am ♪
265
00:11:59,839 --> 00:12:02,878
♪ Rock you like a hurricane ♪
266
00:12:04,916 --> 00:12:06,553
♪ Here I am. ♪
267
00:12:06,553 --> 00:12:08,757
(cheering, applause)
268
00:12:10,861 --> 00:12:13,199
Thank you, Las Vegas.
269
00:12:13,199 --> 00:12:14,434
Yeah, rock and roll.
270
00:12:16,673 --> 00:12:18,075
Message for you
from your old hometown.
271
00:12:18,075 --> 00:12:21,348
Something about
a childhood pact.
272
00:12:21,348 --> 00:12:22,551
Ah...
273
00:12:22,551 --> 00:12:25,490
A pact is a pact.
I'm on my way.
274
00:12:25,490 --> 00:12:28,229
Uh, I got to go, guys.
275
00:12:28,229 --> 00:12:31,135
Oh, here's the instructions
for destroying the asteroid.
276
00:12:31,135 --> 00:12:32,571
You got this!
277
00:12:32,571 --> 00:12:34,274
ANNOUNCER:
Ten, nine...
278
00:12:34,274 --> 00:12:37,314
Homer, it's so nice
to hear your voice
279
00:12:37,314 --> 00:12:39,552
after all these years.
280
00:12:39,552 --> 00:12:42,190
Wow, CEO of your own company.
281
00:12:42,190 --> 00:12:45,731
You know, I pictured you growing
up to be a softball superstar.
282
00:12:45,731 --> 00:12:48,235
Aw, you were always so sweet.
283
00:12:48,235 --> 00:12:49,639
How have you been?
284
00:12:49,639 --> 00:12:52,511
So good.
I practically live on Reddit.
285
00:12:52,511 --> 00:12:54,314
But did you ever get the feeling
286
00:12:54,314 --> 00:12:57,253
that we missed our chance?
287
00:12:57,253 --> 00:12:58,890
I do.
I sure wish
288
00:12:58,890 --> 00:13:01,261
we'd done it 27 years ago.
289
00:13:01,261 --> 00:13:04,502
(gasps) Me too!
Oh, it's all I think about.
290
00:13:04,502 --> 00:13:06,806
Oh, you mean kill Krusto.
291
00:13:06,806 --> 00:13:08,710
Yeah, that would've
been good, too.
292
00:13:08,710 --> 00:13:12,017
Oh, I want to help,
but I'm not sure I can.
293
00:13:12,017 --> 00:13:14,589
I have responsibilities now.
294
00:13:14,589 --> 00:13:16,693
-Hi, Mom.
-What up, Big Blue?
295
00:13:16,693 --> 00:13:19,197
Bert, my little jazz tubist.
296
00:13:19,197 --> 00:13:22,003
And Lizzie,
my special little gal.
297
00:13:22,003 --> 00:13:25,978
Mom, I got an A-plus on my
Elizabeth Cady Stanton diorama.
298
00:13:25,978 --> 00:13:27,848
I threw a stink bomb
in the teacher's lounge
299
00:13:27,848 --> 00:13:29,151
and bike-locked the door.
300
00:13:29,151 --> 00:13:32,692
Well, I'm so proud
of one of those things.
301
00:13:32,692 --> 00:13:34,629
Who's Homer Simpson?
302
00:13:34,629 --> 00:13:36,533
That's a dumb-ass name.
303
00:13:36,533 --> 00:13:38,235
Really?
Our father's name is...
304
00:13:38,235 --> 00:13:39,939
Comic Book Guy.
305
00:13:39,939 --> 00:13:42,912
Homer Simpson is someone
we knew back in Kingfield.
306
00:13:42,912 --> 00:13:46,452
A town we will
never set foot in again.
307
00:13:46,452 --> 00:13:47,822
Mm...
308
00:13:47,822 --> 00:13:49,692
Homer needs us.
We're the only ones
309
00:13:49,692 --> 00:13:51,563
who can kill the clown.
310
00:13:51,563 --> 00:13:52,832
We're adults now.
311
00:13:52,832 --> 00:13:55,370
A kid murderer is a kid problem.
312
00:13:55,370 --> 00:13:58,977
What happened to the boy
who admired my bravery so much
313
00:13:58,977 --> 00:14:00,714
he put it in a poem?
314
00:14:00,714 --> 00:14:02,785
B-By that, you mean me,
of course.
315
00:14:02,785 --> 00:14:04,856
Well, I am a husband now,
and a father.
316
00:14:04,856 --> 00:14:06,693
And I'm-I'm...
317
00:14:06,693 --> 00:14:09,097
-I'm...
-The same little coward...
318
00:14:09,097 --> 00:14:11,402
You always were!
(roars)
319
00:14:12,203 --> 00:14:13,573
Aah!
320
00:14:13,573 --> 00:14:15,811
Marge, I had a dream
about him.
321
00:14:15,811 --> 00:14:17,715
He was just as scary
as I remember,
322
00:14:17,715 --> 00:14:20,353
but updated
for a Gen Z audience.
323
00:14:20,353 --> 00:14:22,257
Honey? Honey?
324
00:14:24,629 --> 00:14:26,031
(grumbles)
325
00:14:26,933 --> 00:14:28,402
To the Losers.
326
00:14:28,402 --> 00:14:30,373
The Losers.
327
00:14:30,373 --> 00:14:33,780
So, how the hell are we gonna
stop that unkillable clown?
328
00:14:33,780 --> 00:14:35,851
We ain't exactly children
no more.
329
00:14:35,851 --> 00:14:37,955
Yeah, but we're still friends.
330
00:14:37,955 --> 00:14:39,859
We're still
full of childlike wonder.
331
00:14:39,859 --> 00:14:41,629
We're still virgins.
332
00:14:41,629 --> 00:14:43,165
-Eesh.
-Mm...
333
00:14:43,165 --> 00:14:46,506
Yeah, we're still, uh...
(clears throat)
334
00:14:46,506 --> 00:14:50,146
Well, whenever
I need to find my courage,
335
00:14:50,146 --> 00:14:53,486
I think of a poem Comic Book Guy
wrote for me when we were kids.
336
00:14:53,486 --> 00:14:54,989
Poem?
337
00:14:54,989 --> 00:14:57,093
It's why
I fell in love with him.
338
00:14:57,828 --> 00:14:58,964
Marge, there's something
339
00:14:58,964 --> 00:15:01,201
I have to tell you right now,
340
00:15:01,201 --> 00:15:03,940
because if I wait
even one more second--
341
00:15:03,940 --> 00:15:08,048
I'm talking one single second,
just one--
342
00:15:08,048 --> 00:15:09,752
something might happen
that will make me not...
343
00:15:09,752 --> 00:15:11,823
-(door opens)
-BERT and LIZZIE: Mom!
344
00:15:11,823 --> 00:15:13,927
Oh... be able to tell you.
345
00:15:13,927 --> 00:15:17,033
Kids, no,
what are you doing here?
346
00:15:17,033 --> 00:15:19,004
They're here
to collect their mother.
347
00:15:19,004 --> 00:15:21,408
Kids, be good
and wait in the car.
348
00:15:21,408 --> 00:15:25,149
Mommy and Daddy have some
grown-up yelling to discuss.
349
00:15:25,951 --> 00:15:28,489
Mom and Dad's hometown
sure sucks.
350
00:15:28,489 --> 00:15:32,430
Misspelled pet cemetery,
Salem's parking lot,
351
00:15:32,430 --> 00:15:36,906
mysterious antique store
that charges by the soul.
352
00:15:36,906 --> 00:15:38,677
What the hell are you watching?
353
00:15:38,677 --> 00:15:40,213
Oh...
354
00:15:40,213 --> 00:15:43,352
Wake up!
We barely escaped last time.
355
00:15:43,352 --> 00:15:46,659
Why risk our lives now
when we have so much to lose?
356
00:15:46,659 --> 00:15:47,928
Present Homers excluded.
357
00:15:47,928 --> 00:15:49,364
(phones dinging, ringing)
358
00:15:50,466 --> 00:15:54,174
Hope you Losers weren't
thinking of leaving just yet.
359
00:15:54,174 --> 00:15:57,915
Not without seeing
my new star attraction.
360
00:15:57,915 --> 00:15:59,217
Help, Mom!
361
00:15:59,217 --> 00:16:02,423
Dad, get your fat ass
down here!
362
00:16:02,423 --> 00:16:03,425
No!
363
00:16:03,425 --> 00:16:05,463
(cackles)
364
00:16:08,269 --> 00:16:09,471
Our kids!
365
00:16:09,471 --> 00:16:10,741
Our phones.
366
00:16:10,741 --> 00:16:12,812
Now it's personal.
367
00:16:12,812 --> 00:16:16,418
Just like it always was.
368
00:16:17,655 --> 00:16:19,725
(grunts)
369
00:16:21,461 --> 00:16:24,535
(sniffs) I smell
thousand-year-old flop sweat.
370
00:16:24,535 --> 00:16:26,171
We must be close.
371
00:16:28,275 --> 00:16:30,012
-LIZZIE: Finally!
-BERT: Mom, Dad!
372
00:16:30,012 --> 00:16:31,081
-Up here!
-(gasps)
373
00:16:31,081 --> 00:16:33,954
Kids! Oh...
374
00:16:33,954 --> 00:16:35,223
Aah!
375
00:16:35,223 --> 00:16:38,830
Well, well.
If it isn't the Losers.
376
00:16:38,830 --> 00:16:42,237
Say hello to my studio audience.
377
00:16:43,005 --> 00:16:44,642
(children laughing)
378
00:16:49,952 --> 00:16:53,459
There's no laughter
like forced laughter.
379
00:16:53,459 --> 00:16:56,198
We're not afraid of you
anymore, clown.
380
00:16:56,198 --> 00:16:58,168
You have no power over us.
381
00:16:58,168 --> 00:17:01,241
He's an astronaut,
she's a seltzer big wig,
382
00:17:01,241 --> 00:17:03,345
and I'm a world-famous,
383
00:17:03,345 --> 00:17:05,951
um, virgin.
384
00:17:05,951 --> 00:17:07,253
Oh, damn it.
385
00:17:07,253 --> 00:17:10,661
The point is we've conquered
our childhood fears.
386
00:17:10,661 --> 00:17:14,902
Ah, but adults have something
much tastier than fears.
387
00:17:14,902 --> 00:17:16,138
Anxieties.
388
00:17:16,138 --> 00:17:18,209
Millions of tiny,
389
00:17:18,209 --> 00:17:20,981
delicious anxieties.
390
00:17:20,981 --> 00:17:22,450
(yelps)
391
00:17:22,450 --> 00:17:24,221
Oh!
392
00:17:25,524 --> 00:17:27,260
(screeching)
393
00:17:27,260 --> 00:17:28,863
You know what I'm thankful for?
394
00:17:28,863 --> 00:17:32,470
The filibuster.
Let's talk about it.
395
00:17:32,470 --> 00:17:33,506
ALL:
Aah!
396
00:17:33,506 --> 00:17:35,076
-(screeching)
-(all whimpering)
397
00:17:35,076 --> 00:17:37,615
But you-- you've got something
398
00:17:37,615 --> 00:17:40,152
worth worrying about.
399
00:17:40,152 --> 00:17:42,056
Why don't I tell Marge
400
00:17:42,056 --> 00:17:44,094
you put your name on the poem
401
00:17:44,094 --> 00:17:46,465
that won her heart, eh?
402
00:17:47,467 --> 00:17:49,004
(yelps)
403
00:17:49,004 --> 00:17:51,108
No, no, please.
404
00:17:51,108 --> 00:17:53,045
It-it wasn't you?
405
00:17:53,045 --> 00:17:56,118
I tried to tell you,
just not very hard.
406
00:17:56,118 --> 00:17:58,389
My life is a lie.
407
00:17:58,389 --> 00:17:59,692
Oh...
408
00:18:02,698 --> 00:18:04,401
He must get his sinister powers
409
00:18:04,401 --> 00:18:06,606
from his captive audience.
410
00:18:06,606 --> 00:18:08,442
Just like Jimmy Fallon.
411
00:18:08,442 --> 00:18:11,448
You have to destroy the sign!
412
00:18:16,358 --> 00:18:18,262
Only you can do it, Marge.
413
00:18:18,262 --> 00:18:20,266
Your arm is summer lightning.
414
00:18:20,266 --> 00:18:22,103
Your bravery, the storm.
415
00:18:22,103 --> 00:18:24,274
You're the chimp in the zoo.
416
00:18:24,274 --> 00:18:27,246
And I'm still bananas for you.
417
00:18:27,246 --> 00:18:30,219
Now, throw, throw!
418
00:18:31,421 --> 00:18:32,958
Hmm?
419
00:18:32,958 --> 00:18:34,795
Ah...
420
00:18:34,795 --> 00:18:36,799
(grunting)
421
00:18:36,799 --> 00:18:38,837
(whimpering)
422
00:18:40,072 --> 00:18:41,876
(grunts)
423
00:18:43,078 --> 00:18:44,649
No!
424
00:18:48,322 --> 00:18:50,694
Why were we laughing?
425
00:18:50,694 --> 00:18:52,296
This show sucks.
426
00:18:52,296 --> 00:18:53,600
Let's go up to heaven
427
00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:56,371
and bask in the glory
of God's stupid love.
428
00:18:56,371 --> 00:18:58,409
♪
429
00:18:59,745 --> 00:19:01,448
My audience! No!
430
00:19:01,448 --> 00:19:03,787
It took me years to grow them.
431
00:19:03,787 --> 00:19:05,657
(groans)
Eh?
432
00:19:05,657 --> 00:19:08,162
Aah! Oh... Oh!
433
00:19:08,162 --> 00:19:10,767
I can't start over! Oh!
434
00:19:10,767 --> 00:19:12,103
What would that even look like?
435
00:19:12,103 --> 00:19:14,107
(whimpers)
436
00:19:14,107 --> 00:19:16,512
Dancing for followers on TikTok?
437
00:19:16,512 --> 00:19:17,447
(groans)
438
00:19:17,447 --> 00:19:20,453
I haven't written a joke
since 1647.
439
00:19:21,488 --> 00:19:23,425
Aah!
And that material has not...
440
00:19:23,425 --> 00:19:25,630
(exclaiming, grunting):
aged...
441
00:19:25,630 --> 00:19:27,801
well. Oh...
442
00:19:27,801 --> 00:19:30,674
I blame cancel culture.
443
00:19:33,112 --> 00:19:35,784
You were finally brave.
444
00:19:35,784 --> 00:19:39,592
Does this make up for
lying to you all these years?
445
00:19:39,592 --> 00:19:41,161
Oh, honey.
446
00:19:41,161 --> 00:19:42,965
Of course not.
447
00:19:42,965 --> 00:19:44,635
No, I get it. (groans)
448
00:19:46,204 --> 00:19:47,908
HOMER:
Mm...
449
00:19:48,943 --> 00:19:50,514
Growing up isn't easy.
450
00:19:50,514 --> 00:19:53,185
The traumas we lived as kids
can haunt us forever,
451
00:19:53,185 --> 00:19:55,857
lurking in the corners
of our mind.
452
00:19:55,857 --> 00:19:57,293
We can't undo the harm,
453
00:19:57,293 --> 00:19:59,698
but with a little help,
we can survive it.
454
00:19:59,698 --> 00:20:04,207
And live the life
we were always meant to.
455
00:20:05,777 --> 00:20:08,950
The humans have vanquished
our thousand-year-old clown,
456
00:20:08,950 --> 00:20:12,457
but surely they will be no match
for our next nightmare--
457
00:20:12,457 --> 00:20:15,530
a Saint Bernard with rabies.
458
00:20:15,530 --> 00:20:16,933
Mm...
459
00:20:16,933 --> 00:20:18,435
An angry car?
460
00:20:18,435 --> 00:20:21,576
Put that in the "maybe" pile.
461
00:20:21,576 --> 00:20:24,815
How about a prom
that goes seriously wrong?
462
00:20:25,817 --> 00:20:27,386
Haunted hotel?
463
00:20:27,386 --> 00:20:29,090
What about some Tommyknockers?
464
00:20:29,090 --> 00:20:30,961
Those sound scary.
465
00:20:30,961 --> 00:20:33,533
Yes, yes!
466
00:20:33,533 --> 00:20:36,071
(cackling)
467
00:20:36,071 --> 00:20:39,244
-Tommyknockers.
-Tommyknockers.
468
00:20:39,244 --> 00:20:41,281
(cackling continues)
469
00:20:41,281 --> 00:20:44,755
-Tommyknockers.
-Tommyknockers.
470
00:20:51,536 --> 00:20:54,508
Captioning sponsored by
20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION
471
00:20:54,508 --> 00:20:57,714
and FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY
472
00:20:57,714 --> 00:21:00,486
and TOYOTA.
473
00:21:00,486 --> 00:21:03,726
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org
474
00:21:31,081 --> 00:21:33,318
(shrieks)