1
00:00:08,341 --> 00:00:09,426
D'oh!
2
00:00:28,862 --> 00:00:32,574
{\an8}I am so excited
for the scout jamboree this weekend.
3
00:00:32,574 --> 00:00:35,452
{\an8}Dad, hand over the family bugle.
4
00:00:35,452 --> 00:00:36,870
{\an8}Here she is.
5
00:00:36,870 --> 00:00:38,872
{\an8}Old Blowy.
6
00:00:40,123 --> 00:00:43,043
Hmm?
7
00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:45,003
{\an8}What? You're not a boy.
8
00:00:45,003 --> 00:00:46,838
{\an8}You can't join the Boy Explorers.
9
00:00:46,838 --> 00:00:48,798
{\an8}And that's a flugelhorn.
10
00:00:48,882 --> 00:00:50,967
{\an8}Yes. It's the hardest horn.
11
00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:52,969
{\an8}And, FYI, I did join.
12
00:00:53,053 --> 00:00:55,472
{\an8}And I already have three badges--
13
00:00:55,472 --> 00:00:56,848
{\an8}environmentalism,
14
00:00:56,848 --> 00:00:57,974
{\an8}badge-receiving,
15
00:00:58,058 --> 00:00:59,893
{\an8}and sibling rivalry.
16
00:00:59,893 --> 00:01:01,728
{\an8}Come on, you two...
17
00:01:01,728 --> 00:01:04,439
Attention, corporate overlords.
18
00:01:04,439 --> 00:01:06,316
{\an8}We are Pseudo-nonymous,
19
00:01:06,316 --> 00:01:09,027
{\an8}and we have taken over this broadcast.
20
00:01:09,027 --> 00:01:12,739
We are the anarchist collective
of nameless hacktivists
21
00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:15,700
who published the internal emails
of Waffle House
22
00:01:15,784 --> 00:01:19,871
and brought Home Depot's
"find a store near you" feature
23
00:01:19,871 --> 00:01:21,206
to its knees.
24
00:01:21,206 --> 00:01:25,293
Now we have hacked
into the Disney Corporation's servers
25
00:01:25,293 --> 00:01:29,339
and seized hundreds of hours
of never-before-aired footage
26
00:01:29,339 --> 00:01:32,342
from the television show The Simpsons.
27
00:01:32,342 --> 00:01:35,970
Stories so ill-conceived, so idiotic,
28
00:01:36,054 --> 00:01:38,348
that their exposure would destroy
29
00:01:38,348 --> 00:01:41,643
the value of the very I.P. itself.
30
00:01:41,643 --> 00:01:45,855
Until we are paid a ransom
of $20 million in Bitcoin,
31
00:01:45,939 --> 00:01:48,733
we will air these show-destroying scenes
32
00:01:48,817 --> 00:01:50,235
one after another,
33
00:01:50,235 --> 00:01:52,195
starting now.
34
00:01:54,948 --> 00:01:57,242
No, no, it can't be true.
35
00:01:57,242 --> 00:01:59,035
It is true, Carl.
36
00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:01,162
There never was a Lenny.
37
00:02:01,246 --> 00:02:04,666
So, Lenny was just
a figment of my imagination?
38
00:02:04,666 --> 00:02:06,459
I... I made him up?
39
00:02:06,543 --> 00:02:08,628
Yeah, your psyche created "Lenny"
40
00:02:08,628 --> 00:02:11,297
to help you deal with
a terrible trauma there.
41
00:02:11,381 --> 00:02:14,717
- What trauma?
- Finding out your previous
best friend wasn't real.
42
00:02:14,801 --> 00:02:16,469
It's kind of a thing with you.
43
00:02:16,553 --> 00:02:19,597
Huh. Hey, I haven't
seen you in here before.
44
00:02:19,681 --> 00:02:21,432
I'm Carl. What's your name?
45
00:02:21,516 --> 00:02:23,226
Nice to meet you, Steven.
46
00:02:23,226 --> 00:02:25,311
Aw, crap, here we go again.
47
00:02:26,396 --> 00:02:28,773
Now you see we mean business, Disney.
48
00:02:28,857 --> 00:02:32,569
{\an8}You will submit $20 million
in Bitcoin to our crypto wallet
49
00:02:32,569 --> 00:02:34,654
{\an8}at the following address.
50
00:02:34,654 --> 00:02:36,156
{\an8}Until the payment arrives,
51
00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:38,741
{\an8}we will keep playing
these nonsensical clips
52
00:02:38,825 --> 00:02:40,994
{\an8}no one was ever meant to see.
53
00:02:43,580 --> 00:02:45,081
What's his name?
54
00:02:45,165 --> 00:02:46,332
Number Eight.
55
00:02:46,416 --> 00:02:48,585
I mean, Santa's Little Helper.
56
00:02:50,170 --> 00:02:53,256
Greetings, lamewads from the past.
57
00:02:53,256 --> 00:02:56,634
I have come back in time
to reveal the events of the future,
58
00:02:56,718 --> 00:02:59,304
so that you can amaze the world
59
00:02:59,304 --> 00:03:03,433
with your uncannily accurate predictions.
60
00:03:03,433 --> 00:03:05,643
Less yelling, more foretelling.
61
00:03:05,727 --> 00:03:07,687
My first shocking prediction is,
62
00:03:07,687 --> 00:03:09,022
in 2016,
63
00:03:09,022 --> 00:03:12,859
the Nobel Prize in Economics will go to...
64
00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:14,903
Bengt R. Holmström!
65
00:03:14,903 --> 00:03:17,238
Why would anyone
care if we predicted that?
66
00:03:17,322 --> 00:03:18,656
I don't know, but they will.
67
00:03:18,740 --> 00:03:20,283
Do you have anything a little more...
68
00:03:20,283 --> 00:03:22,243
oh, impressive?
69
00:03:22,327 --> 00:03:23,995
Donald Trump is gonna be president.
70
00:03:23,995 --> 00:03:26,915
Aah! Less impressive! Less impressive!
71
00:03:26,915 --> 00:03:29,792
Okay, let's see.
You're gonna want to mention gas hoarding,
72
00:03:29,876 --> 00:03:31,085
pandemics,
73
00:03:31,169 --> 00:03:34,088
Germany beats Brazil
in the 2014 World Cup,
74
00:03:34,172 --> 00:03:35,340
Disney buys Fox.
75
00:03:35,340 --> 00:03:37,175
And then they both go under?
76
00:03:37,175 --> 00:03:39,636
No, they're both absorbed
by Panda Express.
77
00:03:39,636 --> 00:03:42,263
Pretty much everything now
is Panda Express.
78
00:03:42,347 --> 00:03:43,598
- That makes sense.
- I get it.
79
00:03:43,598 --> 00:03:45,683
Ooh. Orange chicken.
80
00:03:51,147 --> 00:03:52,982
Yarr.
81
00:03:53,066 --> 00:03:55,068
Yarr.
82
00:03:55,068 --> 00:03:56,486
Aye.
83
00:03:56,486 --> 00:03:57,862
- Yarr!
- Aye!
84
00:04:00,573 --> 00:04:01,658
Yarr?
85
00:04:01,658 --> 00:04:03,117
: Aye.
86
00:04:06,454 --> 00:04:08,164
Yarr!
87
00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:09,415
Aye!
88
00:04:12,585 --> 00:04:13,836
Aye?
89
00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:15,672
Yarr.
90
00:04:15,672 --> 00:04:16,839
Aye?
91
00:04:16,923 --> 00:04:17,882
Yarr!
92
00:04:19,384 --> 00:04:20,301
Aye?
93
00:04:20,385 --> 00:04:21,469
Yarr.
94
00:04:21,469 --> 00:04:23,680
- Aye! Aye!
- Yarr. Yarr.
95
00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:25,265
- Aye!
- Yarr!
96
00:04:26,975 --> 00:04:28,434
Aye!
97
00:04:29,310 --> 00:04:30,353
: Aye.
98
00:04:30,353 --> 00:04:31,896
: Yarr.
99
00:04:31,980 --> 00:04:33,731
Yarr.
100
00:04:35,066 --> 00:04:38,528
{\an8}-Yarr, yarr, yarr, yarr!
- Aye, aye, aye, aye, aye,
aye, aye, aye, aye, aye!
101
00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:44,742
Till the morrow, chums.
102
00:04:44,826 --> 00:04:45,952
Ooh!
103
00:04:51,791 --> 00:04:53,710
Is that you, babe?
104
00:04:53,710 --> 00:04:55,878
: Yeah, yeah, I'm home.
105
00:04:55,962 --> 00:04:58,798
- Daddy. Daddy. How was school?
- Hey.
106
00:04:58,798 --> 00:05:00,842
It ain't school for Daddy, sweetheart.
107
00:05:00,842 --> 00:05:02,010
It's work.
108
00:05:02,010 --> 00:05:05,305
Soul-sucking, grueling work.
109
00:05:05,305 --> 00:05:06,764
Then why don't you quit?
110
00:05:06,848 --> 00:05:09,225
Always with the quitting, this one.
111
00:05:09,309 --> 00:05:11,728
I can't do that, Doreen!
112
00:05:11,728 --> 00:05:16,190
The police department
needs someone inside the school!
113
00:05:16,274 --> 00:05:18,318
So why's it got to be you?
114
00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:19,402
Look at me, Didi.
115
00:05:19,402 --> 00:05:21,404
I'm the only 36-year-old
116
00:05:21,404 --> 00:05:23,364
who can pass for ten!
117
00:05:23,448 --> 00:05:25,366
How 'bout passing for a good father?
118
00:05:25,450 --> 00:05:26,951
The kids hardly know you.
119
00:05:27,035 --> 00:05:29,912
You're out every afternoon till 3:00 p.m.
120
00:05:29,996 --> 00:05:31,873
4:00 if there's chess club.
121
00:05:31,873 --> 00:05:33,291
You think I want to be there?
122
00:05:33,291 --> 00:05:34,792
Martin likes chess.
123
00:05:34,876 --> 00:05:37,837
Not me!
124
00:05:37,837 --> 00:05:42,008
I don't know where Martin
ends and my Reggie begins.
125
00:05:48,931 --> 00:05:50,933
Aw, maybe you're right.
126
00:05:51,017 --> 00:05:52,935
Maybe I am in too deep.
127
00:05:53,019 --> 00:05:56,105
It's just, when I was
diagnosed with... this,
128
00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:58,566
I said, "I'm not gonna let it beat me.
129
00:05:58,566 --> 00:06:00,610
I'm gonna use it for good."
130
00:06:00,610 --> 00:06:03,196
I'm doing good, aren't I?
131
00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:04,405
You are, Reg.
132
00:06:04,489 --> 00:06:07,116
You're a great role model for your kids.
133
00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:09,160
All three of 'em.
134
00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:10,953
You mean?
135
00:06:11,037 --> 00:06:12,288
I do.
136
00:06:13,373 --> 00:06:15,375
:
They still haven't paid the ransom.
137
00:06:15,375 --> 00:06:17,794
Did they not see the nonsense
we just released?
138
00:06:17,794 --> 00:06:20,046
How is Martin Prince an adult cop?
139
00:06:20,046 --> 00:06:22,048
: Well, maybe I overestimated
140
00:06:22,048 --> 00:06:24,258
how much Disney cares about Lenny.
141
00:06:24,342 --> 00:06:26,094
No, it's not your fault.
142
00:06:26,094 --> 00:06:28,638
You're the finest
digital terrorist I know.
143
00:06:28,638 --> 00:06:32,308
Your malware shut down
the Portland Airport for two weeks.
144
00:06:32,392 --> 00:06:35,520
Everyone missed Thanksgiving.
145
00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:37,814
It's sweet you remembered.
146
00:06:37,814 --> 00:06:41,192
Aw, you're sweet, too.
147
00:06:41,192 --> 00:06:43,069
We should probably get back to...
148
00:06:43,069 --> 00:06:45,238
:
blackmailing the major corporation.
149
00:06:45,238 --> 00:06:48,574
Wait. Why did
the voice-changing app switch off?
150
00:06:48,658 --> 00:06:51,828
: Bollocks.
I didn't upgrade to the premium edition,
151
00:06:51,828 --> 00:06:54,247
and the free trial period
ran out, I'm afraid.
152
00:06:54,247 --> 00:06:56,124
I am so daft.
153
00:06:56,124 --> 00:06:57,834
Oh, my God, you're British?
154
00:06:57,834 --> 00:07:01,379
That must be delightful
for your wife or girlfriend.
155
00:07:01,379 --> 00:07:02,880
Oh, no, I'm painfully single.
156
00:07:02,964 --> 00:07:05,550
Nary a romantic appointment
in my "shed-you-ul."
157
00:07:05,550 --> 00:07:07,385
Say that last part again.
158
00:07:07,385 --> 00:07:09,720
You mean... "shed-you-ul"?
159
00:07:09,804 --> 00:07:12,515
: Shed-you-ul.
160
00:07:12,515 --> 00:07:14,767
Shed-you-ul.
161
00:07:19,605 --> 00:07:21,649
Oh. We're back on. We're live.
162
00:07:21,649 --> 00:07:23,860
Well, I-I suppose we should
threaten them some more.
163
00:07:23,860 --> 00:07:27,447
How about I just run
another batch of show-ruining clips
164
00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:28,531
so we can...
165
00:07:28,531 --> 00:07:30,533
Topple the capitalist system
166
00:07:30,533 --> 00:07:32,034
and its bought-and-paid-for...
167
00:07:32,118 --> 00:07:34,954
Political enablers.
168
00:07:37,290 --> 00:07:39,167
Hello. How are you?
169
00:07:39,167 --> 00:07:42,003
I would like to report
a big fire in Springfield.
170
00:07:42,003 --> 00:07:44,505
Do you speak English?
171
00:07:44,589 --> 00:07:47,258
Yes. But I am taking a French class...
172
00:07:47,258 --> 00:07:49,802
how says one, "immersion"?
173
00:07:49,886 --> 00:07:52,847
We're trapped! Someone get help!
174
00:07:52,847 --> 00:07:56,767
I must speak French and only French
175
00:07:56,851 --> 00:07:58,478
for six weeks.
176
00:07:58,478 --> 00:08:01,063
I can't help if I can't understand you.
177
00:08:01,147 --> 00:08:03,774
Won't anyone do something?!
178
00:08:03,858 --> 00:08:07,445
Well, it's a really good class...
179
00:08:07,445 --> 00:08:09,113
Please hurry (familiar), er,
180
00:08:09,197 --> 00:08:10,907
please hurry (formal), if you please.
181
00:08:10,907 --> 00:08:15,786
The fire is approaching a house of...
182
00:08:15,912 --> 00:08:17,205
fireworks?
183
00:08:18,623 --> 00:08:21,167
{\an8} Never mind.
184
00:08:23,711 --> 00:08:25,379
Let me get this straight.
185
00:08:25,463 --> 00:08:29,383
You mowed down all that corn
to build a football field,
186
00:08:29,467 --> 00:08:32,303
hoping it would lure
the ghosts of former players
187
00:08:32,303 --> 00:08:34,305
down from football heaven?
188
00:08:34,305 --> 00:08:36,724
Uh-huh. And look.
189
00:08:38,809 --> 00:08:41,771
Hey, I don't recognize any of these guys.
190
00:08:41,771 --> 00:08:44,482
Why are there two 50-yard lines?
191
00:08:44,482 --> 00:08:45,775
Aw, damn it.
192
00:08:45,775 --> 00:08:47,735
I built a Canadian field.
193
00:08:48,819 --> 00:08:50,071
Oh. Sorry, hoser.
194
00:08:50,071 --> 00:08:51,155
My bad, eh?
195
00:08:51,239 --> 00:08:53,658
Hey, nice rouge there, Gordo.
196
00:08:53,658 --> 00:08:55,660
Hey, Homer. Throw you a Hail Mary?
197
00:08:55,660 --> 00:08:57,828
Shut up, Flutie.
198
00:08:59,956 --> 00:09:03,209
{\an8}Uh, yes.
The day is Sol, uh, 150.
199
00:09:03,209 --> 00:09:05,586
{\an8}I am stranded on Mars.
200
00:09:05,670 --> 00:09:09,465
I suspect my fellow astronauts
left me behind on purpose,
201
00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:11,133
as from the bathroom
202
00:09:11,217 --> 00:09:13,427
I did hear the giggling and the shushing
203
00:09:13,511 --> 00:09:16,806
and the "Blast off quick
before he's done tinkling."
204
00:09:16,806 --> 00:09:20,309
I have a mere three days
of air and water remaining.
205
00:09:20,393 --> 00:09:22,812
There is no hope.
206
00:09:22,812 --> 00:09:24,814
Unless I glayvenate the hydrogen,
207
00:09:24,814 --> 00:09:26,315
flavenize the oxygen,
208
00:09:26,399 --> 00:09:29,068
and, yes, yes, poopulate the soil.
209
00:09:29,068 --> 00:09:32,154
{\an8}It was a simple matter
of applying pseudoscience
210
00:09:32,238 --> 00:09:35,992
{\an8}and phantasmagorical engineering
to the problem. Yes.
211
00:09:35,992 --> 00:09:39,036
Oh, yes, I also cloned myself for company.
212
00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:41,205
And my fellow Frinks have built us all
213
00:09:41,289 --> 00:09:43,040
an escape rocket. Isn't that wonderful?
214
00:09:45,960 --> 00:09:47,461
Leaving.
215
00:09:49,297 --> 00:09:51,424
Aw, flayvin me in the glayvin!
216
00:09:53,551 --> 00:09:55,011
Hello. This is Homer Simpson.
217
00:09:55,011 --> 00:09:57,138
From the bottom of my heart, I apologize
218
00:09:57,138 --> 00:10:00,182
to the great, great,
great people of Finland
219
00:10:00,266 --> 00:10:01,183
for what I said.
220
00:10:01,267 --> 00:10:03,185
I have done many, many,
221
00:10:03,269 --> 00:10:05,438
many, many, many episodes,
222
00:10:05,438 --> 00:10:07,356
and in one of those-- just one--
223
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:09,108
I mixed you up with Norway.
224
00:10:09,108 --> 00:10:13,654
And I have so, so, so, so,
so much love and respect for...
225
00:10:13,738 --> 00:10:15,531
I think "Finns" is what you're called.
226
00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:17,283
And if I ever-- I mean ever--
227
00:10:17,283 --> 00:10:19,285
ever, ever, ever thought
228
00:10:19,285 --> 00:10:20,953
that an innocent slip of the tongue
229
00:10:21,037 --> 00:10:22,538
is something that an entire nation
230
00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:23,956
could get worked up about,
231
00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:26,208
I would've kept my mouth shut.
232
00:10:26,292 --> 00:10:30,046
And the scary, scary,
scary, oh-so-scary lawyers
233
00:10:30,046 --> 00:10:32,465
of the giant, giant-- I mean giant--
234
00:10:32,465 --> 00:10:35,843
so, so giant, scary corporation I work for
235
00:10:35,843 --> 00:10:38,387
would not have had
to draft this statement.
236
00:10:38,471 --> 00:10:39,847
God bless you
237
00:10:39,847 --> 00:10:42,683
and all the peoples of South America,
238
00:10:42,767 --> 00:10:45,269
for you are a... What?
239
00:10:45,353 --> 00:10:47,563
What do you mean
I have to record it again?
240
00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:48,689
What did I say?
241
00:10:55,279 --> 00:10:57,573
You're chewing too loud.
242
00:10:57,657 --> 00:11:00,534
From now on, only two chews per bite.
243
00:11:00,618 --> 00:11:03,412
One, two, swallow. One, two, swallow.
244
00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:07,750
I think I've misplaced
my appetite, mother.
245
00:11:09,835 --> 00:11:13,673
I need to see you right now.
246
00:11:18,844 --> 00:11:19,887
I deserve this.
247
00:11:19,887 --> 00:11:22,181
I deserve to feel like a man.
248
00:11:23,349 --> 00:11:26,936
Only with you do I truly feel alive.
249
00:11:26,936 --> 00:11:29,355
I made this just for you.
250
00:11:29,355 --> 00:11:31,732
Thank you, Mother.
251
00:11:31,816 --> 00:11:36,362
Anything for my son. I am so proud of you.
252
00:11:36,362 --> 00:11:38,989
Oh, Mommy. I can't wait another second.
253
00:11:39,073 --> 00:11:40,574
You know I need it.
254
00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:02,471
I almost forgot to give you this.
255
00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:04,348
Leave it on the dresser.
256
00:12:08,018 --> 00:12:10,688
If only that were my real mother.
257
00:12:10,688 --> 00:12:14,859
If only that were my real son.
258
00:12:19,447 --> 00:12:21,490
I don't mean to be unneighborly, but, uh,
259
00:12:21,574 --> 00:12:24,285
you wouldn't know what happened
to my old nostril skirt?
260
00:12:24,285 --> 00:12:28,080
Mustache you say? Hmm, let me think.
261
00:12:28,164 --> 00:12:31,333
Stroking this goatee I've always had.
262
00:12:31,417 --> 00:12:33,294
Stroking, stroking...
263
00:12:33,294 --> 00:12:36,922
That's it. Boys, we're Jewish now.
264
00:12:37,006 --> 00:12:39,300
- L'chaim!
- To life!
265
00:12:41,886 --> 00:12:43,512
Mmm.
266
00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:45,973
From bun to pickle, a masterpiece.
267
00:12:45,973 --> 00:12:50,060
The exquisite flavor is matched
only by the peerless mouthfeel.
268
00:12:50,144 --> 00:12:51,479
Five stars.
269
00:12:51,479 --> 00:12:54,064
Bravo, Harvey Comics, bravo.
270
00:12:54,148 --> 00:12:56,484
A stunning addition to the Casper-verse.
271
00:12:56,484 --> 00:12:58,652
No notes. Ten stars.
272
00:12:58,736 --> 00:13:00,988
With this level
of sour cream in your blood,
273
00:13:00,988 --> 00:13:04,033
your brain is completely starved
of oxygen.
274
00:13:04,033 --> 00:13:06,368
Consequently, you're a moron.
275
00:13:06,452 --> 00:13:09,872
A perfect explanation.
Succinct and devastating.
276
00:13:09,872 --> 00:13:11,540
Infinite stars.
277
00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:14,668
Best. Diagnosis. Ev...
278
00:13:21,550 --> 00:13:22,802
Give me a beer, pally.
279
00:13:22,802 --> 00:13:24,804
Hey, I know you, don't I?
280
00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:27,348
Nah, must be thinking
of someone else, slim.
281
00:13:27,348 --> 00:13:30,559
No, I've definitely seen you around town.
282
00:13:30,643 --> 00:13:31,811
Sign here, chief.
283
00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:33,562
Here's your passport, gorgeous.
284
00:13:33,646 --> 00:13:35,481
Brake pads are shot, tough guy.
285
00:13:35,481 --> 00:13:36,899
Want that toasted, honcho?
286
00:13:36,899 --> 00:13:38,651
Found your car keys, big shot.
287
00:13:38,651 --> 00:13:40,236
Those were all you.
288
00:13:40,236 --> 00:13:42,029
I don't know what to tell you, slick.
289
00:13:42,029 --> 00:13:44,240
Just got that sort of face.
290
00:13:47,660 --> 00:13:49,578
Pally-pally-pally-pally-pally-
291
00:13:49,662 --> 00:13:54,333
pally-pally-pally-pally-pally-
pally-pally-pally-pally-pally...
292
00:13:59,380 --> 00:14:03,592
- Oh, my God, you're beautiful.
- You're more beautiful.
293
00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:05,052
Oh. Oh, dear.
294
00:14:05,052 --> 00:14:08,264
The world has seen
our exquisite symmetrical faces.
295
00:14:08,264 --> 00:14:11,433
Then they've also seen
that we're... in love?
296
00:14:11,517 --> 00:14:12,643
My God. Yes.
297
00:14:12,643 --> 00:14:14,562
Yes, that's what it is, isn't it?
298
00:14:14,562 --> 00:14:16,605
It is. It-it is stunning.
299
00:14:16,689 --> 00:14:19,775
As stunning as this list
of abandoned episodes
300
00:14:19,859 --> 00:14:23,279
that started as clever titles
and went nowhere.
301
00:14:24,363 --> 00:14:27,283
{\an8}Hopin' for the dream ♪
302
00:14:27,283 --> 00:14:28,784
{\an8}Hopin' ♪
303
00:14:28,868 --> 00:14:31,787
{\an8}Focus like a laser beam ♪
304
00:14:31,871 --> 00:14:34,790
{\an8}♪ I'll keep fighting
till I want something great ♪
305
00:14:34,874 --> 00:14:37,835
{\an8}Hopin' for a dream ♪
306
00:14:39,378 --> 00:14:43,799
{\an8}Hopin' for a dream ♪
307
00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:47,261
{\an8}- Hopin' ♪
- To someday, somehow have a goal ♪
308
00:14:47,261 --> 00:14:48,304
{\an8}I'll keep fight. ♪
309
00:14:49,388 --> 00:14:50,973
Are we crazy?
310
00:14:50,973 --> 00:14:53,601
Can two people, forbidden from sharing
311
00:14:53,601 --> 00:14:57,146
any personal information,
really make a life together?
312
00:14:57,146 --> 00:14:59,148
I do think we owe it to each other to try,
313
00:14:59,148 --> 00:15:01,150
um... whoever you are.
314
00:15:01,150 --> 00:15:02,651
I can't wait
315
00:15:02,735 --> 00:15:06,488
until we're Mr. and Mrs. Redacted.
316
00:15:07,573 --> 00:15:09,241
FBI!
317
00:15:09,325 --> 00:15:10,910
Surrender, hacker scum.
318
00:15:10,910 --> 00:15:14,163
If we're going down,
we'll take The Simpsons with us.
319
00:15:14,163 --> 00:15:17,249
I'm gonna play the dog scene.
320
00:15:21,587 --> 00:15:23,213
: Good morning, Homer.
321
00:15:26,258 --> 00:15:28,594
It's morning?!
322
00:15:30,721 --> 00:15:33,098
FBI!
323
00:15:33,182 --> 00:15:35,684
We've got you cyberterrorists surrounded.
324
00:15:35,768 --> 00:15:36,977
This is it, darling.
325
00:15:37,061 --> 00:15:39,021
I've cued up the very
worst-of-the-worst clips
326
00:15:39,021 --> 00:15:40,356
to play one by one.
327
00:15:40,356 --> 00:15:43,359
When we push this button,
The Simpsons dies.
328
00:15:43,359 --> 00:15:45,611
- Together, then.
- Together.
329
00:15:47,529 --> 00:15:50,199
The lies... stop... now.
330
00:15:50,199 --> 00:15:51,700
Aah!
331
00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:53,994
I know Eddie is Ralph's father.
332
00:15:54,078 --> 00:15:56,622
Look at the hair. Look at the hair.
333
00:15:56,622 --> 00:15:59,291
No, Clancy, I swear to you it's not true.
334
00:15:59,375 --> 00:16:02,503
My son's breath smells like cat food.
335
00:16:02,503 --> 00:16:03,963
Okay, you got me.
336
00:16:06,632 --> 00:16:09,051
: I'll have the veal.
337
00:16:10,135 --> 00:16:13,639
The lies... stop... now.
338
00:16:15,224 --> 00:16:17,101
I did a DNA test.
339
00:16:17,101 --> 00:16:18,811
I'm not your son.
340
00:16:18,811 --> 00:16:20,813
Luann, how could you?
341
00:16:20,813 --> 00:16:22,398
I'm not hers either.
342
00:16:22,398 --> 00:16:25,067
We're not your parents?
343
00:16:25,067 --> 00:16:26,527
- All right!
- Oh, thank God.
344
00:16:26,527 --> 00:16:29,321
- Yes!
- Oh...
345
00:16:30,406 --> 00:16:33,575
: The lies... stop... now.
346
00:16:33,659 --> 00:16:35,077
Ow!
347
00:16:35,077 --> 00:16:37,246
Marge,
348
00:16:37,246 --> 00:16:39,081
I'm not your sister.
349
00:16:39,081 --> 00:16:40,833
I'm... your mother.
350
00:16:40,833 --> 00:16:43,002
But... but... wait, what?
351
00:16:43,002 --> 00:16:45,379
I was young and briefly hot.
352
00:16:45,379 --> 00:16:47,006
It was a different time.
353
00:16:47,006 --> 00:16:50,592
Back then, we solved things
with huge lies.
354
00:16:50,676 --> 00:16:53,095
Then who was my real father?
355
00:16:53,095 --> 00:16:56,223
His name was Disco...
356
00:16:56,223 --> 00:16:59,101
Disco...
357
00:16:59,101 --> 00:17:01,687
Disco who? Disco Who?
358
00:17:02,771 --> 00:17:05,774
The lies... stop... now.
359
00:17:07,026 --> 00:17:09,194
Rake-y, I'm not your real father.
360
00:17:09,278 --> 00:17:12,114
And I'm not Scottish, I'm Welsh.
361
00:17:12,114 --> 00:17:15,034
Oh, don't turn your back on me.
362
00:17:18,287 --> 00:17:20,539
T-minus one minute to launch.
363
00:17:20,539 --> 00:17:23,500
Ooh.
364
00:17:23,584 --> 00:17:25,294
All for you, baby.
365
00:17:25,294 --> 00:17:27,087
Aah!
366
00:17:27,171 --> 00:17:30,257
Aah! Aah!
367
00:17:30,257 --> 00:17:34,053
We are the jockeys, jockeys are we ♪
368
00:17:34,053 --> 00:17:38,098
♪ We live underground
in a fiberglass tree. ♪
369
00:17:38,182 --> 00:17:39,767
- Aah!
- Opa!
370
00:17:47,316 --> 00:17:48,901
Aah!
371
00:17:49,902 --> 00:17:52,654
It's still me on the inside.
372
00:17:55,657 --> 00:18:00,412
Sin-ner! Sin-ner!
373
00:18:03,082 --> 00:18:06,168
Oh, Homie. You're awake.
374
00:18:06,168 --> 00:18:08,545
- What happened?
- You've been in a coma
375
00:18:08,629 --> 00:18:11,340
ever since you tried
to jump Springfield Gorge.
376
00:18:11,340 --> 00:18:12,424
How long?
377
00:18:12,508 --> 00:18:14,510
Two days ago.
378
00:18:14,510 --> 00:18:17,721
Two days? But... I had so many adventures.
379
00:18:17,805 --> 00:18:19,515
More than 700.
380
00:18:19,515 --> 00:18:23,435
Those were all coma dreams.
None of them ever happened.
381
00:18:23,519 --> 00:18:25,521
The B stories, too?
382
00:18:27,106 --> 00:18:29,817
I never had a pet lobster?
383
00:18:29,817 --> 00:18:32,027
I never went to space?
384
00:18:32,111 --> 00:18:35,364
What about the Halloweens?!
385
00:18:36,448 --> 00:18:38,367
Drop your code
and move away from the Internet.
386
00:18:38,367 --> 00:18:39,952
You're both under arrest.
387
00:18:39,952 --> 00:18:42,371
On what charge-- grand theft heart?
388
00:18:42,371 --> 00:18:44,498
Conspiracy to commit to love?
389
00:18:44,498 --> 00:18:47,543
Willfully endangering
each other's loneliness?
390
00:18:47,543 --> 00:18:50,129
Take one more step and I'll blow this I.P.
391
00:18:50,129 --> 00:18:52,297
to Magic Kingdom come.
392
00:18:52,381 --> 00:18:55,008
Go ahead. You've already
released all the Simpsons files.
393
00:18:55,092 --> 00:18:56,218
No one cared.
394
00:18:56,218 --> 00:18:57,678
The only people still watching that show
395
00:18:57,678 --> 00:19:00,222
are football fans
who passed out with the TV on.
396
00:19:00,222 --> 00:19:02,766
I am not talking about The Simpsons.
397
00:19:02,850 --> 00:19:05,060
We've hacked into all of Disney.
398
00:19:05,144 --> 00:19:08,397
That means Star Wars, Marvel, Pixar.
399
00:19:08,397 --> 00:19:09,565
We've even got...
400
00:19:09,565 --> 00:19:11,483
Nat Geo.
401
00:19:11,567 --> 00:19:13,152
You monsters.
402
00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:15,904
If I press this button,
the only Hulk that exists
403
00:19:15,988 --> 00:19:17,739
will be Edward Norton.
404
00:19:17,823 --> 00:19:20,325
It'll be like Ruffalo never happened.
405
00:19:20,409 --> 00:19:21,743
You're bluffing.
406
00:19:21,827 --> 00:19:24,204
I'll delete Baby Groot, Baby Yoda,
407
00:19:24,288 --> 00:19:27,916
and their brand-new top secret character--
408
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,793
Baby Jeff Goldblum.
409
00:19:29,877 --> 00:19:33,213
{\an8}On the one hand, uh, "goo,"
410
00:19:33,297 --> 00:19:34,882
{\an8}but I'd be remiss
411
00:19:34,882 --> 00:19:37,259
{\an8}if I didn't also mention,
412
00:19:37,259 --> 00:19:39,094
{\an8}uh, "gaa."
413
00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:40,762
{\an8}Oh, my golly.
414
00:19:40,846 --> 00:19:43,348
{\an8}It's me as a baby.
415
00:19:43,432 --> 00:19:45,392
Good God. She's not bluffing.
416
00:19:45,392 --> 00:19:47,186
Stand down. Let 'em go.
417
00:19:47,186 --> 00:19:50,439
I'll do it.
418
00:19:50,439 --> 00:19:52,941
Um... we now return you to your regularly
419
00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:54,568
"shed-you-uled" programming.
420
00:19:54,568 --> 00:19:55,611
: Oh...
421
00:19:56,778 --> 00:19:59,907
How do you lose two children?
422
00:19:59,907 --> 00:20:02,534
What kind of jamboree
are you running here?
423
00:20:06,038 --> 00:20:07,331
Yeah, you're back!
424
00:20:10,334 --> 00:20:11,543
Ew.
425
00:20:11,627 --> 00:20:14,463
When we get home, can we turn on the TV
426
00:20:14,463 --> 00:20:18,634
and never, ever go outdoors again?
427
00:20:18,634 --> 00:20:21,553
- Please?
- Pretty please?
428
00:20:21,637 --> 00:20:24,681
I've never been prouder of you two.
429
00:20:24,765 --> 00:20:26,141
While you were gone,
430
00:20:26,225 --> 00:20:27,768
your mom and I almost got divorced
431
00:20:27,768 --> 00:20:29,478
over something insignificant.
432
00:20:29,478 --> 00:20:32,147
Luckily, your dad apologized.
433
00:20:32,231 --> 00:20:34,233
Yup, I got it down at this point.
434
00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:36,610
It's all about the eye contact.
435
00:20:36,610 --> 00:20:38,987
He knows what works.
436
00:20:52,084 --> 00:20:53,710
{\an8}Maybe we didn't get the Bitcoin,
437
00:20:53,794 --> 00:20:55,212
{\an8}but we've got each other.
438
00:20:55,212 --> 00:20:56,964
{\an8}Oh, darling, I think we should do it--
439
00:20:56,964 --> 00:21:00,008
{\an8}I think we should
tell each other our real names.
440
00:21:00,092 --> 00:21:01,760
{\an8}My name is Ashley.
441
00:21:01,760 --> 00:21:03,845
{\an8}No! So is mine.
442
00:21:03,929 --> 00:21:04,972
{\an8}- Oh...
- Ashley.
443
00:21:04,972 --> 00:21:06,431
{\an8}Oh, Ashley.
444
00:21:06,515 --> 00:21:10,102
{\an8}- Ashley, Ashley.
- Oh, oh, British Ashley. Mmm...
445
00:21:30,122 --> 00:21:31,623
Shh.
446
00:21:33,625 --> 00:21:36,003
{\an8}Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH