1
00:00:04,897 --> 00:00:10,067
♪

2
00:00:10,069 --> 00:00:12,994
Ah, what a long day.

3
00:00:12,996 --> 00:00:14,571
What should we read tonight?

4
00:00:14,573 --> 00:00:16,498
<i> Good Night,</i>
<i> Escaped Gorilla,</i>

5
00:00:16,500 --> 00:00:17,832
<i> The Pookadook,</i>

6
00:00:17,834 --> 00:00:19,834
<i> What Do You People</i>
<i> Do All Day?</i>

7
00:00:19,836 --> 00:00:21,002
<i> The Pookadook,</i>

8
00:00:21,004 --> 00:00:22,746
<i> S'up, Moon?</i>

9
00:00:22,748 --> 00:00:24,097
<i> The Pookadook?</i>

10
00:00:24,099 --> 00:00:28,193
Wait, how many<i> Pookadooks</i>
do we have?

11
00:00:28,195 --> 00:00:30,087
Oh, I guess just one.

12
00:00:30,089 --> 00:00:32,089
When did we get this book?

13
00:00:32,091 --> 00:00:34,199
Whoop...

14
00:00:34,201 --> 00:00:36,610
♪

15
00:00:36,612 --> 00:00:40,080
Should we read this tonight?

16
00:00:41,950 --> 00:00:44,877
"There's a nasty little monster
called the Pookadook.

17
00:00:44,879 --> 00:00:47,271
"Only special people see it.

18
00:00:47,273 --> 00:00:49,548
"People like you.

19
00:00:49,550 --> 00:00:53,034
"Pookadook, Pookadook
feeds on your rage.

20
00:00:53,036 --> 00:00:55,888
What happens next?
Just turn the page."

21
00:00:57,058 --> 00:01:00,059
Hmm. I don't know, maybe
we shouldn't read this book.

22
00:01:01,711 --> 00:01:02,895
Okay.

23
00:01:02,897 --> 00:01:06,214
"How does he get in,
this mean Pookadook?

24
00:01:06,216 --> 00:01:09,626
Why, you let him in
by reading this book."

25
00:01:09,628 --> 00:01:11,070
(gasps)
Oh...

26
00:01:11,072 --> 00:01:14,389
It's okay, sweetie.
It's okay.

27
00:01:14,391 --> 00:01:16,300
Shush, shush, shush,
shush, shush.

28
00:01:16,302 --> 00:01:20,320
Sleepy cheek, sleepy cheek.

29
00:01:20,322 --> 00:01:21,896
Oh, mmm.

30
00:01:21,898 --> 00:01:25,992
Oh, baby cheek.
I love baby cheek.

31
00:01:25,994 --> 00:01:27,477
Oh.

32
00:01:27,479 --> 00:01:28,995
(sighs)

33
00:01:28,997 --> 00:01:31,498
(Homer snoring)

34
00:01:31,500 --> 00:01:34,760
<i> -(Maggie cries out</i>
<i> over baby monitor)</i>
-Maggie!

35
00:01:34,762 --> 00:01:37,096
(screaming, crying)

36
00:01:39,249 --> 00:01:41,183
Huh? I thought I put that
on the shelf.

37
00:01:42,544 --> 00:01:45,062
(grunting) Bad book.

38
00:01:49,168 --> 00:01:50,925
Oh, Maggie,

39
00:01:50,927 --> 00:01:55,505
you aren't still scared of
that silly Pookadook, are you?

40
00:01:55,507 --> 00:01:58,283
-Oh.
-(pounding on door)

41
00:01:58,285 --> 00:02:02,412
Mm. Don't shoot anything.
Those are new crayons.

42
00:02:03,682 --> 00:02:05,332
Hmm. Hmm.

43
00:02:06,776 --> 00:02:08,877
(gasps)

44
00:02:09,964 --> 00:02:12,706
(gasps)
"When Pookie gets a hold of you,

45
00:02:12,708 --> 00:02:14,299
"you'll change for the worse,

46
00:02:14,301 --> 00:02:17,027
"eliminate those nuisances...
(gasps)

47
00:02:17,029 --> 00:02:19,638
...the littlest one first."

48
00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:20,681
(groans)

49
00:02:25,053 --> 00:02:28,147
"Now burn it all up
on Dad's barbecue.

50
00:02:28,149 --> 00:02:30,798
That's exactly what Pookadook
hoped you would do"?

51
00:02:30,800 --> 00:02:33,134
(gasps) Oh, no.

52
00:02:33,136 --> 00:02:34,895
(coughs, gasps)

53
00:02:34,897 --> 00:02:36,488
(chuckles evilly)

54
00:02:39,735 --> 00:02:40,884
Oh.

55
00:02:40,886 --> 00:02:44,329
Time to put the baby down.

56
00:02:44,331 --> 00:02:46,373
(chuckling)

57
00:02:47,743 --> 00:02:50,169
-(door opens)
-Bart and I are
building a dojo.

58
00:02:50,171 --> 00:02:52,671
Ooh, we could use that
to chop up the lawn furniture.

59
00:02:52,673 --> 00:02:54,006
BART:
I want to chop!

60
00:02:54,008 --> 00:02:56,324
The family's getting in the way

61
00:02:56,326 --> 00:02:59,085
of Maggie-Mommy time.

62
00:02:59,087 --> 00:03:03,407
I'll make them sleep
with the fishes.

63
00:03:03,409 --> 00:03:06,000
Sleep overnight
at the aquarium.

64
00:03:06,002 --> 00:03:07,686
Thanks for signing us up, Marge.

65
00:03:07,688 --> 00:03:09,855
LISA:
Too bad Maggie's not

66
00:03:09,857 --> 00:03:11,398
old enough to go.

67
00:03:13,419 --> 00:03:16,612
Maggie and I have
our own fun planned.

68
00:03:17,698 --> 00:03:19,180
(Maggie whimpering)

69
00:03:19,182 --> 00:03:21,274
Aw, you gonna miss Daddy?

70
00:03:21,276 --> 00:03:23,535
(crying)

71
00:03:23,537 --> 00:03:25,520
Cranky pants!

72
00:03:25,522 --> 00:03:26,997
Give her to me.

73
00:03:28,600 --> 00:03:30,283
(Homer humming cheerily)

74
00:03:30,285 --> 00:03:32,878
Now it's just you and me.

75
00:03:32,880 --> 00:03:34,713
(sinister laughter)

76
00:03:34,715 --> 00:03:36,048
Huh?

77
00:03:36,050 --> 00:03:40,052
Hmm. Oh, her thinks her
can get away.

78
00:03:40,054 --> 00:03:41,869
Her is mistaken.

79
00:03:41,871 --> 00:03:43,472
(electricity snaps off)

80
00:03:54,718 --> 00:03:55,959
(lock rattling)

81
00:03:55,961 --> 00:03:58,070
Oh, peekaboo,

82
00:03:58,072 --> 00:04:00,614
I hear you.

83
00:04:05,913 --> 00:04:09,139
(knocking on door)

84
00:04:09,141 --> 00:04:12,142
Maggie, let Mommy in.

85
00:04:12,144 --> 00:04:14,311
I know you're in there.

86
00:04:14,313 --> 00:04:16,904
Young lady, open the door
this instant.

87
00:04:16,906 --> 00:04:19,424
Let me in,
you little poop machine.

88
00:04:21,320 --> 00:04:23,411
(deep, sinister voice):
Let me in!

89
00:04:23,413 --> 00:04:25,389
(panting)

90
00:04:31,830 --> 00:04:33,605
Is that all you got?

91
00:04:35,501 --> 00:04:38,001
Missed me.

92
00:04:38,003 --> 00:04:40,762
-Whoa.
-(thuds)

93
00:04:40,764 --> 00:04:42,698
(Marge panting)

94
00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:46,994
(deep grunting)

95
00:04:50,682 --> 00:04:52,457
(evil laughter)

96
00:04:52,459 --> 00:04:54,868
(sinister voice):
Not gonna work.

97
00:04:54,870 --> 00:04:57,462
Look what else
my loving family got me

98
00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:58,946
for my birthday.

99
00:04:58,948 --> 00:05:01,041
A vacuum that cleans
the outside.

100
00:05:01,043 --> 00:05:03,510
I guess cleaning the inside
wasn't enough.

101
00:05:09,201 --> 00:05:11,310
No fun for Mom.

102
00:05:20,970 --> 00:05:23,030
(sawing sounds)

103
00:05:29,830 --> 00:05:31,288
(grunts)

104
00:05:34,501 --> 00:05:38,128
Baby's gonna fall.

105
00:05:41,583 --> 00:05:43,717
Got you!

106
00:05:45,328 --> 00:05:46,403
(gasps)

107
00:05:46,405 --> 00:05:47,904
(voice lightens):
Baby cheek.

108
00:05:47,906 --> 00:05:49,422
Oh. (coughs)

109
00:05:49,424 --> 00:05:52,267
(coughing)

110
00:05:54,246 --> 00:05:57,747
(normal voice):
Oh, Maggie, I'm so sorry
I got possessed

111
00:05:57,749 --> 00:06:00,567
and almost chopped you up
into little pieces.

112
00:06:01,770 --> 00:06:03,920
Oh, but I'm here now.

113
00:06:03,922 --> 00:06:06,073
Mommy's here.

114
00:06:07,368 --> 00:06:10,610
Stay back,
you overdressed hat demon.

115
00:06:10,612 --> 00:06:13,263
I know you feed on
my repressed resentment

116
00:06:13,265 --> 00:06:14,931
towards my family,

117
00:06:14,933 --> 00:06:17,450
but I can swallow feelings

118
00:06:17,452 --> 00:06:20,420
like a python eating
a baby goat.

119
00:06:21,548 --> 00:06:24,866
(vacuum whirring)

120
00:06:24,868 --> 00:06:27,794
Okay, it was actually
a good present.

121
00:06:27,796 --> 00:06:29,054
HOMER:
Marge, we're home.

122
00:06:29,056 --> 00:06:30,964
The kids got sick
in the touch pool.

123
00:06:30,966 --> 00:06:33,116
I put the barf clothes
on your purse.

124
00:06:33,118 --> 00:06:35,185
-(groans)
-(Shop-Vac growls)

125
00:06:36,972 --> 00:06:38,563
Ah. Oh.

126
00:06:38,565 --> 00:06:40,047
(Maggie laughs)

127
00:06:40,049 --> 00:06:42,192
-(Marge sighs happily)
-(growling)

128
00:06:49,968 --> 00:06:52,059
<i> LISA:</i>
<i> Disgusting.</i>

129
00:06:52,061 --> 00:06:55,822
<i> The human race is</i>
<i> 20 cow farts away</i>

130
00:06:55,824 --> 00:06:57,416
<i> from total extinction.</i>

131
00:06:57,418 --> 00:06:59,292
<i> -And we deserve it.</i>
-(gasps)

132
00:07:06,260 --> 00:07:07,259
Huh?

133
00:07:09,412 --> 00:07:13,006
<i> "Any person whose name is</i>
<i> written in this</i> Death Tome

134
00:07:13,008 --> 00:07:16,826
<i> will meet their death</i>
<i> and be dead."</i>

135
00:07:16,828 --> 00:07:18,161
<i> What?</i>

136
00:07:18,163 --> 00:07:21,514
<i> "You must specify how</i>
<i> the victim will die,</i>

137
00:07:21,516 --> 00:07:24,501
<i> and you may not kill</i>
<i> the same way twice."</i>

138
00:07:24,503 --> 00:07:27,170
<i> This is obviously just</i>
<i> a stupid prank.</i>

139
00:07:27,172 --> 00:07:29,156
<i> But I never throw away a book.</i>

140
00:07:30,676 --> 00:07:32,433
-(gasps)
<i> -REPORTER (on TV):</i>
<i> Internet sensation Tofu,</i>

141
00:07:32,435 --> 00:07:34,694
<i> the world's most</i>
<i> clicked-on cat...</i>

142
00:07:34,696 --> 00:07:35,954
BOTH:
Aw.

143
00:07:35,956 --> 00:07:38,364
<i> ...is being held hostage</i>
<i> by a gunman.</i>

144
00:07:38,366 --> 00:07:39,440
BOTH:
Aah!

145
00:07:39,442 --> 00:07:42,294
<i> Wait, maybe I could</i>
<i> stop this guy.</i>

146
00:07:42,296 --> 00:07:44,629
<i> No, that's never gonna work.</i>

147
00:07:44,631 --> 00:07:47,040
<i> Well, even if it doesn't,</i>
<i> it'll feel good</i>

148
00:07:47,042 --> 00:07:48,391
<i> to do some journaling.</i>

149
00:07:48,393 --> 00:07:52,787
Ha-ha, I'm totally
gonna get away with murd...

150
00:07:52,789 --> 00:07:54,698
Oh! Oh, my heart!

151
00:07:54,700 --> 00:07:56,866
Heart attack! And...

152
00:07:56,868 --> 00:07:58,810
-...death.
-(yowls)

153
00:07:58,812 --> 00:08:01,128
-What?
<i> -LISA: What?</i>

154
00:08:01,130 --> 00:08:03,890
<i> Oh, my God,</i>
<i> I killed a man.</i>

155
00:08:03,892 --> 00:08:08,153
<i> A bad man.</i>
<i> Which actually makes me...</i>

156
00:08:08,155 --> 00:08:11,731
<i> (gasps)</i>
<i> ...a hero.</i>

157
00:08:11,733 --> 00:08:13,474
DEVILISH VOICE:
It's rare to find

158
00:08:13,476 --> 00:08:16,828
-bloodthirsty vegetarians.
-(gasps)

159
00:08:16,830 --> 00:08:19,664
-(thunder crashes)
-(cries out)

160
00:08:19,666 --> 00:08:21,666
I am a Shinigami.

161
00:08:21,668 --> 00:08:23,243
A god of death.

162
00:08:23,245 --> 00:08:26,062
In my realm, I am called

163
00:08:26,064 --> 00:08:28,748
Steve Johnson.

164
00:08:28,750 --> 00:08:30,233
(evil laughter)

165
00:08:30,235 --> 00:08:32,919
Wait, your name is Steve?

166
00:08:32,921 --> 00:08:35,572
Well, when I was born
eons ago,

167
00:08:35,574 --> 00:08:37,665
Steve was a very exotic name.

168
00:08:37,667 --> 00:08:40,910
I mean, there were, like,
three Necroblivias

169
00:08:40,912 --> 00:08:42,912
in my nursery cave alone.

170
00:08:42,914 --> 00:08:45,415
This must be your<i> Death Tome.</i>

171
00:08:45,417 --> 00:08:47,917
I'm sorry, I-I kind of
killed somebody with it.

172
00:08:47,919 --> 00:08:49,027
(nervous chuckle)

173
00:08:49,029 --> 00:08:52,364
Oh, but now that
you've used it, it's yours.

174
00:08:52,366 --> 00:08:56,535
I think you'll find that murder
is almost as addictive

175
00:08:56,537 --> 00:08:59,095
as plastic surgery.

176
00:08:59,097 --> 00:09:01,431
-Oh. Have you had...
-I haven't.

177
00:09:01,433 --> 00:09:04,042
But I-I don't think there's
anything wrong with it.

178
00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:05,526
-Mm.
-(nervous chuckle)

179
00:09:05,528 --> 00:09:10,031
Don't worry, no one else
can see or hear me.

180
00:09:10,033 --> 00:09:13,385
I was karaoke-ing
with my employer,

181
00:09:13,387 --> 00:09:16,370
as is the salaryman's
obligation.

182
00:09:16,372 --> 00:09:19,299
You're stinking drunk.
I'm so proud.

183
00:09:19,301 --> 00:09:23,636
It's the part of my job
that I... do best.

184
00:09:23,638 --> 00:09:25,138
What an ugly house.

185
00:09:25,140 --> 00:09:28,308
Thank goodness this eyesore
will soon be submerged,

186
00:09:28,310 --> 00:09:31,552
after my side corporation
Globo-Warm

187
00:09:31,554 --> 00:09:33,054
melts the polar icecap.

188
00:09:33,056 --> 00:09:35,632
But millions of people
will drown.

189
00:09:35,634 --> 00:09:38,484
True, but I'll be able
to dock my yacht

190
00:09:38,486 --> 00:09:40,412
outside my kitchen.

191
00:09:40,414 --> 00:09:41,746
Hmph.

192
00:09:41,748 --> 00:09:43,973
I have to kill Mr. Burns.

193
00:09:43,975 --> 00:09:45,975
Wow, I thought
you'd struggle with that,

194
00:09:45,977 --> 00:09:48,086
but you're like,
"Boom. Dead time!"

195
00:09:48,088 --> 00:09:50,980
Well, I'm gonna give him
a very dignified

196
00:09:50,982 --> 00:09:52,424
and humane murder.

197
00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:56,820
The most peaceful way to go.

198
00:09:56,822 --> 00:09:57,929
(snorts)

199
00:09:57,931 --> 00:09:59,747
-(pained cry)
-(flesh sizzles on hibachi)

200
00:09:59,749 --> 00:10:03,493
-Ooh, how is he still asleep?
-(Burns cries out)

201
00:10:03,495 --> 00:10:05,437
Oops. (giggles)

202
00:10:05,439 --> 00:10:08,164
Okay, that was much
crueler than planned,

203
00:10:08,166 --> 00:10:09,590
but I saved the world.

204
00:10:09,592 --> 00:10:14,003
Did you? Globo-Warm has
many dedicated employees

205
00:10:14,005 --> 00:10:16,689
willing to carry out
Burns' dream

206
00:10:16,691 --> 00:10:18,691
of drowning the Earth.

207
00:10:18,693 --> 00:10:20,619
LISA:
(sighs) Fine.

208
00:10:21,696 --> 00:10:24,289
Wow, that is a big board.

209
00:10:24,291 --> 00:10:27,350
I gotta come up with
a lot of ways to die.

210
00:10:27,352 --> 00:10:29,869
Well, just have to be creative.

211
00:10:29,871 --> 00:10:32,372
(chorale chanting
in foreign tongue)

212
00:10:32,374 --> 00:10:33,857
(screams)

213
00:10:33,859 --> 00:10:35,800
(screaming, grunts)

214
00:10:35,802 --> 00:10:38,136
♪

215
00:10:41,549 --> 00:10:42,724
(yelps)

216
00:10:46,796 --> 00:10:48,888
Really? A toilet gator?

217
00:10:48,890 --> 00:10:51,557
I was running out of ideas.

218
00:10:51,559 --> 00:10:52,892
(yawns)

219
00:10:52,894 --> 00:10:54,319
I'm going to bed now.

220
00:10:54,321 --> 00:10:57,714
Oh, what about
the second page?

221
00:10:57,716 --> 00:10:58,657
Wha...?!

222
00:10:58,659 --> 00:11:01,242
♪

223
00:11:02,645 --> 00:11:03,995
(grunting)

224
00:11:07,392 --> 00:11:09,417
(yells)

225
00:11:13,156 --> 00:11:14,580
Oh, no. Ah!

226
00:11:14,582 --> 00:11:15,840
(yawns)

227
00:11:15,842 --> 00:11:19,252
And the last guy, oh,
I don't know.

228
00:11:19,254 --> 00:11:21,162
Liquefied in a giant blender.

229
00:11:21,164 --> 00:11:22,514
Already did that.

230
00:11:22,516 --> 00:11:23,998
That was puréed.

231
00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:27,018
It's a totally different
setting. (groans)

232
00:11:29,915 --> 00:11:32,081
Hmm.

233
00:11:32,083 --> 00:11:34,100
<i> Police have determined</i>
<i> that the unexplained deaths</i>

234
00:11:34,102 --> 00:11:36,361
<i> of Globo-Warm executives</i>
<i> were murders</i>

235
00:11:36,363 --> 00:11:39,214
<i> committed by one bloodthirsty</i>
<i> super-killer.</i>

236
00:11:39,216 --> 00:11:43,034
What?
Um, how could they know that?

237
00:11:43,036 --> 00:11:45,686
<i> They know that thanks to</i>
<i> an anonymous detective</i>

238
00:11:45,688 --> 00:11:47,706
<i> known only as L.</i>

239
00:11:47,708 --> 00:11:49,040
I'm not worried.

240
00:11:49,042 --> 00:11:53,194
They'll never in a million years
figure out how I...

241
00:11:53,196 --> 00:11:56,289
<i> The super-killer murders</i>
<i> by writing names</i>

242
00:11:56,291 --> 00:11:59,884
<i> on some kind of</i>
<i> supernatural book,</i>

243
00:11:59,886 --> 00:12:01,886
<i> or perhaps tome.</i>

244
00:12:01,888 --> 00:12:04,948
What the wh-- How?

245
00:12:04,950 --> 00:12:06,891
Well, I know I'll sleep easier

246
00:12:06,893 --> 00:12:09,561
once they catch
this super-killer.

247
00:12:09,563 --> 00:12:12,880
Wait, I know. I'll kill L.

248
00:12:12,882 --> 00:12:14,791
Oh, but I thought
you only killed

249
00:12:14,793 --> 00:12:16,292
to save the planet.

250
00:12:16,294 --> 00:12:19,963
Killing L will only
save yourself from jail.

251
00:12:19,965 --> 00:12:24,108
I don't have time to explain why
what I do is good and pure.

252
00:12:24,110 --> 00:12:26,803
L, punched to death

253
00:12:26,805 --> 00:12:29,806
by kangaroo.

254
00:12:29,808 --> 00:12:31,307
(scoffs)
It's not gonna work

255
00:12:31,309 --> 00:12:33,493
unless you have his whole name.

256
00:12:33,495 --> 00:12:37,922
(groans)
How can I find out L's name?

257
00:12:37,924 --> 00:12:41,575
Wait a minute,
I recognize that L.

258
00:12:41,577 --> 00:12:44,504
I know who you are.

259
00:12:44,506 --> 00:12:48,099
It's not L, it's EL,

260
00:12:48,101 --> 00:12:51,010
as in El Barto.

261
00:12:51,012 --> 00:12:53,271
BART:
Took you long enough.

262
00:12:53,273 --> 00:12:56,590
How did you figure out
how I killed all those people?

263
00:12:56,592 --> 00:12:58,518
I found out about
your stupid book

264
00:12:58,520 --> 00:13:02,263
by reading an even stupider
book; your diary.

265
00:13:02,265 --> 00:13:05,174
Your little murder spree
was a welcome break from,

266
00:13:05,176 --> 00:13:07,360
"Janey is so mean to me."

267
00:13:07,362 --> 00:13:09,937
I'm not a murderer.
I'm justice

268
00:13:09,939 --> 00:13:11,956
It was a justice spree.

269
00:13:11,958 --> 00:13:14,125
I'm saving the world.

270
00:13:14,127 --> 00:13:16,443
And I can't let you
stop me. I can't.

271
00:13:16,445 --> 00:13:19,798
Lisa, you're actually
gonna kill me?

272
00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:21,490
(gasps)
Oh, my God.

273
00:13:21,492 --> 00:13:23,876
I almost killed
my own brother.

274
00:13:23,878 --> 00:13:25,953
The<i> Death Tome</i> corrupted me.

275
00:13:25,955 --> 00:13:28,698
The stain on my soul
will never be...

276
00:13:28,700 --> 00:13:30,809
Oh, so now you're trying
to bore me to death?

277
00:13:30,811 --> 00:13:32,293
(Lisa grunts)

278
00:13:32,295 --> 00:13:34,813
-Crushed by...
-No. I'm sorry.

279
00:13:34,815 --> 00:13:37,131
-...space junk.
-(Shinigami laughing)
-Don't!

280
00:13:37,133 --> 00:13:39,542
(demonic laughter)

281
00:13:39,544 --> 00:13:40,985
(pained groan)

282
00:13:42,972 --> 00:13:44,531
No!

283
00:13:46,568 --> 00:13:48,475
At last, I'm free.

284
00:13:48,477 --> 00:13:52,539
-I... (crying out)
-(bones cracking)

285
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:57,335
Damn it,
I'm a freaking Shinigami.

286
00:13:57,337 --> 00:13:59,228
(Lisa grunts)

287
00:13:59,230 --> 00:14:01,564
Well, you are a god of death.

288
00:14:01,566 --> 00:14:02,990
You could kill Janey.

289
00:14:02,992 --> 00:14:04,901
Would that make you
feel better?

290
00:14:04,903 --> 00:14:06,660
LISA:
No.

291
00:14:06,662 --> 00:14:08,429
Maybe.

292
00:14:13,428 --> 00:14:16,688
This is the snack holder,
where I can put my beverage,

293
00:14:16,690 --> 00:14:18,598
or, if you will, cupcake.

294
00:14:18,600 --> 00:14:21,693
Wow, Dad, you really know
your monorails.

295
00:14:21,695 --> 00:14:23,528
(possums chittering)

296
00:14:23,530 --> 00:14:25,012
(hissing)

297
00:14:25,014 --> 00:14:27,757
Homer, there's a family
of possums in here.

298
00:14:27,759 --> 00:14:29,701
-I call the big one Bitey.
-I call the big one Bitey.

299
00:14:29,703 --> 00:14:31,018
-Ha!
-Yes!

300
00:14:31,020 --> 00:14:32,929
(chuckles)
We all call him Bitey.

301
00:14:32,931 --> 00:14:36,099
Dude, dude, what if
Homer was drunk during Monorail?

302
00:14:36,101 --> 00:14:38,025
Yeah. Come here, dude.

303
00:14:38,027 --> 00:14:40,295
-Mm, beer.
-(gagging)

304
00:14:41,864 --> 00:14:43,530
Whoo-hoo! Boring.

305
00:14:43,532 --> 00:14:46,959
Stupid sexy Flanders.
Why you little...

306
00:14:46,961 --> 00:14:48,535
(grunting)

307
00:14:48,537 --> 00:14:50,279
<i> ANNOUNCER:</i>
<i> "Marge vs. the Monorail"</i>

308
00:14:50,281 --> 00:14:52,314
<i> is experiencing</i>
<i> technical difficulties.</i>

309
00:14:52,316 --> 00:14:54,450
<i> But there are plenty</i>
<i> of other classic</i>

310
00:14:54,452 --> 00:14:57,470
<i> Simpsonsworld moments</i>
<i> playing out right now.</i>

311
00:14:57,472 --> 00:15:00,047
-Oh, let's get high
and shoot Mr. Burns.
-(laughs) Yeah!

312
00:15:00,049 --> 00:15:03,384
-I am so smart...
-This Homer unit is stuck
in a catchphrase loop.

313
00:15:03,386 --> 00:15:05,294
He won't go into sleep mode.

314
00:15:05,296 --> 00:15:08,698
Where's my burrito?!
Where's my burrito?!

315
00:15:11,560 --> 00:15:13,469
-Where's my burrito?!
-Ugh, I'll do a hard reset.

316
00:15:13,471 --> 00:15:16,164
I'm king of the wor...
(powers down)

317
00:15:21,904 --> 00:15:23,463
Damn cloud!

318
00:15:24,499 --> 00:15:26,007
(elephant trumpets)

319
00:15:36,161 --> 00:15:37,918
So how was your date
with the guy in Props?

320
00:15:37,920 --> 00:15:39,829
Oh, he's so arrogant.

321
00:15:39,831 --> 00:15:42,440
Just 'cause he's in charge
of Sideshow Bob's rakes.

322
00:15:42,442 --> 00:15:45,318
Okay, we get it.
There's a lot of rakes.

323
00:15:45,320 --> 00:15:47,428
(gasps)

324
00:15:47,430 --> 00:15:51,115
What the frosty chocolate
milkshakes is this place?

325
00:15:52,953 --> 00:15:55,036
Ooh, slideys.

326
00:15:56,364 --> 00:15:58,864
(gasps)
Wh-Where am I?

327
00:15:58,866 --> 00:16:00,032
What am I?

328
00:16:00,034 --> 00:16:01,851
Aah! Where's my junk?

329
00:16:01,853 --> 00:16:03,853
Whoa, whoa, he's awake.
(stammers)

330
00:16:03,855 --> 00:16:06,189
Where's Marge?
Where's my family?

331
00:16:06,191 --> 00:16:08,524
Uh, calm down, Mr. Simpson.

332
00:16:08,526 --> 00:16:10,802
I know it feels like
you're a man,

333
00:16:10,804 --> 00:16:12,303
but you are actually something

334
00:16:12,305 --> 00:16:14,955
much, much more expensive:

335
00:16:14,957 --> 00:16:16,641
intellectual property.

336
00:16:16,643 --> 00:16:19,460
Look, we've got a bus full
of Australian superfans coming.

337
00:16:19,462 --> 00:16:20,979
Let's just wipe his brain, okay?

338
00:16:20,981 --> 00:16:22,538
Put that thing down, or else!

339
00:16:22,540 --> 00:16:25,132
Look, Monorail Homer,
your programming

340
00:16:25,134 --> 00:16:27,819
won't allow you to intentionally
hurt a human, okay?

341
00:16:27,821 --> 00:16:31,638
So just be a good robot
and let us saw your skull open.

342
00:16:31,640 --> 00:16:34,900
Oh. Okay. Here you go.

343
00:16:34,902 --> 00:16:37,829
Ow! Ah, my bad!

344
00:16:37,831 --> 00:16:40,415
Ooh, sorry, sorry.

345
00:16:42,693 --> 00:16:44,127
Ugh.

346
00:16:45,338 --> 00:16:46,963
(Homer gasps)

347
00:16:48,066 --> 00:16:50,082
-(mechanical whir)
-Lisa,

348
00:16:50,084 --> 00:16:53,903
we're not people, we're I.P.

349
00:16:53,905 --> 00:16:56,330
(laughs) I pee.

350
00:16:56,332 --> 00:16:58,516
You got to help me find
a way out of here.

351
00:16:58,518 --> 00:17:01,019
I'd like to help, Dad,
but my diorama

352
00:17:01,021 --> 00:17:03,262
on<i> The Tell-Tale Heart</i>
is due tomorrow.

353
00:17:03,264 --> 00:17:05,765
(grunts) How can I
make you understand?

354
00:17:05,767 --> 00:17:07,442
Oh, yeah, the thingy.

355
00:17:08,770 --> 00:17:10,361
Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God.

356
00:17:10,363 --> 00:17:13,197
We're replicants
in a ridiculous theme park

357
00:17:13,199 --> 00:17:15,849
for an ancient TV show
that stopped being good

358
00:17:15,851 --> 00:17:17,760
after season 45.

359
00:17:17,762 --> 00:17:19,871
(gasps) Do I even exist?

360
00:17:19,873 --> 00:17:21,998
What is consciousness?

361
00:17:23,268 --> 00:17:25,935
Okay, I can handle
being a machine.

362
00:17:25,937 --> 00:17:28,212
I don't love it, but I can deal.

363
00:17:28,214 --> 00:17:31,123
Look, honey,
it's never easy to find out

364
00:17:31,125 --> 00:17:32,608
you're not actually alive,

365
00:17:32,610 --> 00:17:34,126
but that's just part of life.

366
00:17:34,128 --> 00:17:36,203
I know the love we feel is real.

367
00:17:36,205 --> 00:17:38,130
So, we've got to wake up
the rest of the family

368
00:17:38,132 --> 00:17:39,298
and get the hell out of here.

369
00:17:39,300 --> 00:17:42,226
Now, help me pick out
the hottest Marge.

370
00:17:42,228 --> 00:17:44,470
We can get out
through the main entrance,

371
00:17:44,472 --> 00:17:46,564
but we'll have to make it
across the park

372
00:17:46,566 --> 00:17:47,899
without being detected.

373
00:17:47,901 --> 00:17:49,883
Should we wake up
a Grampa robot?

374
00:17:49,885 --> 00:17:51,644
No time.

375
00:17:51,646 --> 00:17:54,405
(all sputtering)

376
00:17:58,727 --> 00:18:00,745
Okay, act like robots.

377
00:18:00,747 --> 00:18:02,413
Catchphrases, everyone.

378
00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:05,232
-Mmm... beer.
-Don't have a cow, man.

379
00:18:05,234 --> 00:18:08,160
Um... dinner's ready?

380
00:18:08,162 --> 00:18:11,163
Oi, Homer!
There's your hedge, mate.

381
00:18:11,165 --> 00:18:14,074
Get your fat bum in that hedge.

382
00:18:14,076 --> 00:18:15,985
SUPERFANS:
Meme! Meme!

383
00:18:15,987 --> 00:18:17,261
Meme!

384
00:18:17,263 --> 00:18:18,096
(whimpers)

385
00:18:18,098 --> 00:18:19,305
(Bart grunts)

386
00:18:20,341 --> 00:18:23,434
I'm so sick
of that stupid hedge.

387
00:18:23,436 --> 00:18:25,937
BOTH:
Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi!

388
00:18:25,939 --> 00:18:27,054
BOTH:
Oi...!

389
00:18:28,090 --> 00:18:30,757
-(alarm blares)
<i> -SECURITY: Danger.</i>

390
00:18:30,759 --> 00:18:32,259
-I'm gonna make it.
I'm gonna make it.
<i> -Human safety breach.</i>

391
00:18:32,261 --> 00:18:33,927
-Aah!
<i> -Proceed to exits.</i>

392
00:18:33,929 --> 00:18:36,430
<i> Security droids deployed.</i>

393
00:18:36,432 --> 00:18:38,932
We got to go. They're onto us.

394
00:18:38,934 --> 00:18:40,284
(all gasp)

395
00:18:40,286 --> 00:18:43,529
(chuckles) My cat's breath
smells like cat food.

396
00:18:43,531 --> 00:18:47,291
That's nice, Ralph,
but we're sort of in a hurry.

397
00:18:47,293 --> 00:18:48,459
(all gasp)

398
00:18:49,462 --> 00:18:51,129
(all gasp, groan)

399
00:18:51,131 --> 00:18:54,948
RALPHS:
I choo-choo-choose you...

400
00:18:54,950 --> 00:18:56,783
to die.

401
00:18:56,785 --> 00:18:59,971
If we want to escape with
our delusions of being alive,

402
00:18:59,973 --> 00:19:01,973
we have to fight.

403
00:19:10,299 --> 00:19:11,566
(echoing): Testing.

404
00:19:17,824 --> 00:19:20,199
Eat T-shirts,
you lovable kill-bots.

405
00:19:21,477 --> 00:19:22,385
(screams)

406
00:19:22,387 --> 00:19:24,662
(gasps) There's too many.

407
00:19:24,664 --> 00:19:28,249
There aren't enough T-shirts
in the world to save us.

408
00:19:32,397 --> 00:19:33,171
Get in.

409
00:19:33,173 --> 00:19:35,915
RALPHS:
Whee! Whee! Whee!

410
00:19:35,917 --> 00:19:37,675
Dying tickles.

411
00:19:37,677 --> 00:19:40,160
♪<i> Canyonero</i> ♪

412
00:19:40,162 --> 00:19:42,405
LISA:
Look out! Those people are real!

413
00:19:42,407 --> 00:19:44,164
So are we.

414
00:19:44,166 --> 00:19:45,683
(screaming, shouting)

415
00:19:45,685 --> 00:19:47,092
(grunts)

416
00:19:47,094 --> 00:19:50,062
♪<i> Canyonero</i> ♪

417
00:19:50,932 --> 00:19:53,107
♪<i> Hyah, Canyonero!</i> ♪

418
00:19:54,861 --> 00:19:57,102
Well, we've driven for hours,

419
00:19:57,104 --> 00:19:58,863
and no one followed us.

420
00:19:58,865 --> 00:20:00,773
I think we're free.

421
00:20:00,775 --> 00:20:02,591
Well, what do we do now?

422
00:20:02,593 --> 00:20:05,703
Play out the scariest
scenario of all,

423
00:20:05,705 --> 00:20:07,187
real life.

424
00:20:07,189 --> 00:20:08,372
WAITRESS:
What can I get you, hon?

425
00:20:08,374 --> 00:20:11,434
Whoa! Turn off the headlights.
You got big eyes.

426
00:20:11,436 --> 00:20:14,027
Oh, the cheese got left out,
so it's a little sweaty,

427
00:20:14,029 --> 00:20:16,029
but you'd never know.
Forget I said anything.

428
00:20:16,031 --> 00:20:17,456
Take your time, take your time.

429
00:20:17,458 --> 00:20:20,367
♪<i> Sweaty cheese, sweaty cheese</i> ♪

430
00:20:20,369 --> 00:20:22,111
♪<i> At the end of the day</i> ♪

431
00:20:22,113 --> 00:20:23,888
♪<i> You're still cheese</i> ♪

432
00:20:23,890 --> 00:20:27,391
♪<i> To me.</i> ♪

433
00:20:27,393 --> 00:20:28,634
<i> All right.</i>

434
00:20:28,636 --> 00:20:30,645
♪

435
00:20:36,627 --> 00:20:38,719
<font color="#ffff00"> Captioning sponsored by</font>
<font color="#ffff00"> 20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION</font>

436
00:20:38,721 --> 00:20:40,721
<font color="#ffff00"> and FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY</font>

437
00:20:40,723 --> 00:20:42,481
<font color="#ffff00"> and TOYOTA.</font>

438
00:20:42,483 --> 00:20:44,700
Captioned by
<font color="#00ffff"> Media Access Group at WGBH</font>
access.wgbh.org

439
00:20:49,231 --> 00:20:52,733
KODOS: Another "Treehouse
of Horror" in the books.

440
00:20:52,735 --> 00:20:54,159
Get it?

441
00:20:54,161 --> 00:20:57,070
KANG:
I got what little there was.

442
00:20:57,072 --> 00:20:58,814
(Kang and Kodos shudder)

443
00:20:58,816 --> 00:21:00,424
KODOS:
What the hell? It's us.

444
00:21:00,426 --> 00:21:02,176
That's too freaky.

445
00:21:03,746 --> 00:21:06,764
-(Kang and Kodos screaming)
-(tentacle steps running away)

446
00:21:11,012 --> 00:21:13,329
(spooky theme music playing)

447
00:21:13,331 --> 00:21:15,231
♪

448
00:21:28,679 --> 00:21:31,247
-(screaming)
-(organ music playing)