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- Synced & corrected by MementMori -
-- www.addic7ed.com --
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[EXCLAIMING]
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- Worth it.
- Totally worth it.
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Again!
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♪ ♪
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MARGE: Dinnertime!
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Dad, are you gonna watch
the solar eclipse?
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Sorry, but this is pork chop night.
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♪ ♪
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OTHERS: Ooh!
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LISA: Ah!
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Way to go, God!
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Huh?
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[SHOUTING]
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Aah! My eyes!
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I told you to use the cardboard box!
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I thought you meant for standing on.
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Marge, you gonna eat that
piece of burnt gristle?
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- No.
- Whoo-hoo!
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- [CHEWING NOISILY]
- Homer!
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Did you pour fry pan grease
into the milk carton?
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- Yes, but it's not for...
- Just a splash for my coffee.
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[GROANS] I wanted to watch
the eclipse with you.
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I can only imagine what
you've got planned
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for date night tomorrow.
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Date night?! Marge, if
we're still dating,
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why in the world do we have these kids?
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- What? [GROANS]
- Hmm?
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Hey!
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You need to make me feel
you're as smitten with me
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as you were when we met.
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Marge, darling, you mean as much to me
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as the sun and the moon.
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There was an eclipse of
the sun by the moon,
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and you didn't even walk outside.
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Come on, Marge, you can't be that mad.
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- [GRUMBLING]
- Uh-oh.
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[GROANS] Marge wants a
date night this Saturday.
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You think you've got problems?
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I'm really not liking this new bar mix.
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This Saturday? Is she crazy?
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That's when we spray
nitrous in the ant farm
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and watch 'em go nuts.
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Yeah, here's a taste.
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Stupid ants.
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Maybe I could have a date night here.
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Sure. I'll make it nice.
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Take the paint cans out
of the ladies' room,
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just like the Waldorf Hysteria there.
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I don't know what to do.
I want it to be perfect.
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I've spent so long ignoring
how she thinks and feels.
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Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a
real crotch-22 there.
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You know, Moe, a lot of what
you think you're saying,
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you're not really saying.
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Well, I got to admit, I've been doing
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a little of this nitrous
myself. [CHUCKLES]
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[INHALES]
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Oh. [CHUCKLES]
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[SLURRING]: Stupid ants.
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[CACKLES]
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♪ ♪
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♪ My funny valentine ♪
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♪ Sweet comic valentine ♪
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♪ You make me smile ♪
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♪ With my heart ♪
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♪ Your looks are laughable. ♪
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Aw.
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You didn't have to do that.
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That and much, much more.
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- Huh?
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- Huh? [LAUGHS]
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Corkage fee. $30 dollars?
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Corkage is the sum we charge
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for opening the wine you bring, sir.
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30 bucks to open a box?!
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I mean, nothing's too
good for this lady.
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- Play the violin.
- I am just a waiter, sir.
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I said play the violin.
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[PLAYING OFF-KEY]
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[PLAYING CLASSICAL MUSIC]
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♪ ♪
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[LAUGHS] After dinner drinks.
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I feel like Mrs. Remington Steele.
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♪ Con te partiro ♪
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♪ Paesi che non ho mai... ♪
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[BOTH MOANING]
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[GRAMPA SNORING]
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I want you. I want you!
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And I want you. Only you.
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Oh.
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Ooh.
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[MOANS]: Oh.
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What the...?
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[KNOCK ON DOOR]
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- [KNOCKING CONTINUES]
- [HOMER GRUNTING]
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Oh. Sweetie, I-I think you'd
better see who it is.
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- [SIGHS]
- Homer, I know it's late and
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you've got your "Keep
Out, Flanders" sign up,
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but, uh, I'm sorry, I-I... [SOBS]
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[SNIFFLES] I'm feeling mighty low, sir.
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- MARGE: Who is it, Homie?
- It's stupid no one.
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Flanders? What's wrong?
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Marge, it's date night!
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That's a made-up thing.
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FLANDERS: Mmm-mmm.
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Lukewarm water. If I close my eyes,
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I can pretend I'm at the dentist.
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[SLURPS, SIGHS]
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Afterwards, I'll grab
some Flintstone vitamins
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and try to knock myself out.
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Half a Bamm-Bamm should do it.
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Ned, what happened?
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[SIGHS] I'm out of work.
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The Leftorium is no-morium.
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Hey, Ned. I can't hack it anymore.
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You want to buy my side of the kiosk?
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I'll get all the people
coming out of Sears!
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But I got squat.
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People are getting all their
southpaw sundries online.
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All I was getting were
right-handed college students
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who wanted to experiment.
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Don't worry, Ned.
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Homer will tell you how to
get a job at the plant.
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- I will?
- Yes, you will.
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- Because it's date night.
- You said that wasn't a thing.
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- Let's not fight on date night.
- Oh, all right.
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Call the plant and ask
for Human Resources.
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[CHUCKLES]: Oh, thank you.
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And as a reward, you
get my famous cocoa.
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Now, I assume the two
of you will want a cup?
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[SIGHS] Make my next one a double.
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- [MUSIC PLAYING THROUGHOUT]
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I cannot be your head of Human Resources
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one more second, okay?
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With the verbal abuse
and the physical abuse,
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and the lying under oath.
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And especially this!
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Would you like to be the new
head of Human Resources?
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To quote my pet turtle, "Shell yes!"
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Not so fast.
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You may have to give me
blood from time to time.
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Yes, sir. My blood's like my attitude:
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- B-positive.
- Excellent.
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Isn't this great? We're
carpooling to work.
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So I can see you in
the morning, at work,
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in the evening, and in my dreams,
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thanking you for saving my life.
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Look, Ned, we're just driving together.
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I don't want any "iddlies," "diddlies,"
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"neighborinos" or "oopsy-doopsies."
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- Okily-dokily.
- Here's another suggestion:
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No talk, just music.
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Oh, sure. That's why I brought
this CD of Christian favorites,
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Magical Ministry Tour.
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[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
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♪ Pray, pray, heart and soul ♪
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♪ Stick another dime in
the poor box, baby. ♪
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- Maybe we should talk.
- [MUSIC STOPS]
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Well, of course, my friend.
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- Want to talk about Jesus?
- No.
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- Want to talk about Ecclesiastes?
- No.
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- Want to talk about baby Jesus?
- [MUSIC RESUMES]
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♪ Pray, pray, heart and soul ♪
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♪ Stick another dime and
I'll pray with thee. ♪
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Let's crank it up to six.
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[CROW CAWS]
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- BURNS: You'll notice on your paycheck,
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we've adjusted for desk rental
and electrical power usage.
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[CHUCKLES] Isn't this a power plant?
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As defined by the IRS,
we are a religion.
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And that is the last
question you'll ask of me.
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I will break you in one day.
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- Now we're gonna do a little role-playing
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with Smitty and Jacqueline.
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Smitty, pretend you're greeting her.
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Uh, have a good one.
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Okay, stop right there.
A good one, what?
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An unspecified object is
the devil's wordplay,
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so I say, "Come and
go with a hidely-ho!"
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What a wuss.
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I can hear you.
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Did you help this wuss get this job?
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I just told him who to call.
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And you didn't put in a good word?
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- No.
- You idiot.
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A recommendation from you
would've sunk him for sure.
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Okay, what happens if I touch her?
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Mm. Go ahead.
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Hey, good work today.
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This hardly seems fair!
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Your behavior is
obnoxious and offensive.
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You'll be working for me
in a different capacity.
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- Hmm.
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[VIDEO GAME SOUND EFFECTS]
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- What are you doing, Lisa?
- Making an art project.
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- You color very neatly.
- Thank you.
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Pride's a sin.
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[GROANS] So is snitching to God, Rod.
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I'm Todd. I think.
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[CROW CAWS]
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00:08:52,440 --> 00:08:54,410
[SNORING]
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Homer. Homer.
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Hey, hey! [SHOUTING GROGGILY]
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Homer, you were sleeping at work.
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00:09:00,390 --> 00:09:01,990
I had to mop up your drool.
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00:09:02,020 --> 00:09:04,020
HOMER: Leave me alone.
207
00:09:08,510 --> 00:09:10,540
To beef up team spirit,
I thought I'd form
208
00:09:10,580 --> 00:09:12,210
a little prayer circle at lunch.
209
00:09:12,250 --> 00:09:14,410
Um, if you pray at lunch,
210
00:09:14,450 --> 00:09:16,820
aren't you interrupting God's lunch?
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00:09:16,850 --> 00:09:20,720
Finally, someone thinks about God.
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00:09:22,090 --> 00:09:25,230
[TODD HUMMING]
213
00:09:25,260 --> 00:09:28,490
Um, Todd, do you have
anything else you can do?
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00:09:28,530 --> 00:09:31,900
- Can I pray for you?
- Ugh. If you do it silently.
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00:09:31,930 --> 00:09:33,730
[QUIETLY]: Dear Lord, let Lisa avoid
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00:09:33,770 --> 00:09:35,670
[LOUDER]: The cleansing fire foretold by
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00:09:35,700 --> 00:09:38,670
the Council of Nicaea
before they got leprosy!
218
00:09:38,710 --> 00:09:41,740
- That's not silently!
- You have such great hearing.
219
00:09:41,780 --> 00:09:43,980
[GROANS] I miss Milhouse.
220
00:09:44,010 --> 00:09:46,580
I knew if I switched from
white to dark socks,
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00:09:46,620 --> 00:09:49,180
things would start happening.
222
00:09:49,220 --> 00:09:51,680
Uh, you wanted to see me?
223
00:09:51,720 --> 00:09:54,920
[SIGHS] I happen to know
your father didn't die.
224
00:09:54,960 --> 00:09:57,920
Look, Ned, you have to learn the
way things work around here.
225
00:09:57,960 --> 00:10:00,760
People cut corners. You
have to let things slide.
226
00:10:03,220 --> 00:10:06,020
Let me repeat.
227
00:10:06,050 --> 00:10:08,180
Sorry, Homer, I can't cut you any slack.
228
00:10:08,220 --> 00:10:10,950
I owe it to you to help you
achieve your potential.
229
00:10:10,990 --> 00:10:13,360
Maybe you could help get me
another job at the plant.
230
00:10:13,390 --> 00:10:16,960
One where you don't have to
show up, like safety inspector.
231
00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:18,900
But you are the safety inspector.
232
00:10:18,930 --> 00:10:20,730
Then I should really return these things
233
00:10:20,770 --> 00:10:22,630
that have fallen down my back.
234
00:10:26,570 --> 00:10:29,070
They look like gummy
worms, but they're not.
235
00:10:30,440 --> 00:10:33,340
I can't take it. I can't take it!
236
00:10:33,380 --> 00:10:35,550
Why can't he be like our
neighbor on the other side
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00:10:35,580 --> 00:10:37,710
who we never see?
238
00:10:37,750 --> 00:10:39,250
What's the matter, Homie?
239
00:10:39,280 --> 00:10:42,020
[SOBBING]: Oh, no. No. No.
240
00:10:42,050 --> 00:10:43,220
[DOOR CREAKS]
241
00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:51,800
Eh?
242
00:10:51,830 --> 00:10:54,430
Oh, Lord, it's Homer Simpson.
243
00:10:54,470 --> 00:10:56,700
I forget. Are you seven
hours ahead or behind?
244
00:10:56,740 --> 00:10:59,640
Whatever. I really need
your help with Flanders.
245
00:10:59,670 --> 00:11:01,800
Could you please get him fired?
246
00:11:01,840 --> 00:11:03,910
I feel you. Thanks.
247
00:11:03,940 --> 00:11:06,110
Oh, I reached him.
248
00:11:06,140 --> 00:11:07,780
So, looking through the records,
249
00:11:07,810 --> 00:11:11,800
I discovered this company has
never given anything to charity.
250
00:11:11,820 --> 00:11:12,980
In fact, it looks as if
251
00:11:13,020 --> 00:11:15,620
we've actually taken
money from charities.
252
00:11:15,650 --> 00:11:17,290
Ned, would you mind
253
00:11:17,320 --> 00:11:19,620
if I brought a few associates
into this meeting?
254
00:11:19,660 --> 00:11:20,660
[CHUCKLES]: Well, no.
255
00:11:21,090 --> 00:11:22,470
- [DOGS BARKING]
- [FLANDERS SCREAMS]
256
00:11:22,490 --> 00:11:23,930
- You're fired!
- Nice boy, nice boy!
257
00:11:23,960 --> 00:11:25,430
You're welcome to keep any radiation
258
00:11:25,460 --> 00:11:27,100
that seeped into your bones.
259
00:11:27,130 --> 00:11:29,530
Speaking of charity, call
the orphanage, Smithers.
260
00:11:29,540 --> 00:11:31,130
We have some leaks in our pipes
261
00:11:31,170 --> 00:11:33,000
and need tiny hands to plug them.
262
00:11:33,040 --> 00:11:35,410
Uh, they said they wouldn't
send you any children, sir.
263
00:11:35,440 --> 00:11:37,110
[SCOFFS] They have to say that.
264
00:11:39,610 --> 00:11:42,980
I want to thank you, Homer.
You've been a true blue friend.
265
00:11:43,010 --> 00:11:45,180
Can we talk about something fun?
266
00:11:45,220 --> 00:11:47,420
I now weigh more than Fat Elvis.
267
00:11:47,450 --> 00:11:49,990
Well, I know I got one
advantage you don't.
268
00:11:50,020 --> 00:11:52,320
I got Homer Simpson in my corner.
269
00:11:52,360 --> 00:11:55,020
Um, Ned, I have a confession to make.
270
00:11:55,060 --> 00:11:57,030
Now don't go turning Catholic on me.
271
00:11:57,060 --> 00:11:59,580
I can't. I don't fit in those booths.
272
00:11:59,640 --> 00:12:01,000
Ah, don't worry about me.
273
00:12:01,030 --> 00:12:03,830
I'm sure there's a job out there
for a Bob Jones University grad
274
00:12:03,870 --> 00:12:05,840
who majored in teaching
and casting out demons
275
00:12:05,870 --> 00:12:07,540
and who speaks fluent Aramaic.
276
00:12:07,570 --> 00:12:08,670
[TIRES SCREECH]
277
00:12:09,870 --> 00:12:11,770
- [GASPS]
- [DOG GROWLING]
278
00:12:11,810 --> 00:12:14,380
Hmm. Wish Mr. Burns didn't
send these home with you.
279
00:12:15,810 --> 00:12:18,610
A word to the wise: Don't be cocky.
280
00:12:18,650 --> 00:12:21,220
Don't say you can lifeguard
if you can't swim.
281
00:12:21,250 --> 00:12:23,590
[CHUCKLES] It'll come up, believe me.
282
00:12:25,620 --> 00:12:27,290
- ♪ ♪
283
00:12:27,330 --> 00:12:29,830
- One, two, three. One, two, three.
284
00:12:29,860 --> 00:12:32,300
Make sure you keep at least
five Bibles between you.
285
00:12:32,330 --> 00:12:33,900
Oh, don't got crazy, Patrick Swayze.
286
00:12:33,930 --> 00:12:35,600
Time to put Baby in the corner.
287
00:12:35,630 --> 00:12:37,130
[SCREAMS]
288
00:12:40,510 --> 00:12:44,040
Mm-mm, mm-mm. You can't pose for
your cover photo like that.
289
00:12:45,910 --> 00:12:47,910
Much better.
290
00:12:47,950 --> 00:12:49,710
[SCREAMS]
291
00:12:52,780 --> 00:12:53,780
[SIGHS]
292
00:12:53,790 --> 00:12:55,280
[TIRES SCREECH]
293
00:12:57,660 --> 00:12:59,020
[FLANDERS GROANS]
294
00:12:59,060 --> 00:13:02,560
Ned, would you like to say grace?
295
00:13:02,590 --> 00:13:04,530
[CLEARS THROAT] Heavenly Father,
296
00:13:04,560 --> 00:13:07,700
thank you for the blessing of
being tested, losing my wife,
297
00:13:07,730 --> 00:13:10,820
losing my second wife, losing four jobs,
298
00:13:10,900 --> 00:13:13,870
and losing $23 at blackjack to Bart.
299
00:13:13,910 --> 00:13:17,040
23 chips, so $2,300.
300
00:13:17,080 --> 00:13:20,180
- I'll finish grace at home.
- Can you do that?
301
00:13:20,210 --> 00:13:22,380
Yes, I can do that!
302
00:13:22,410 --> 00:13:26,120
Oh, God, now the apologies
are gonna start.
303
00:13:26,150 --> 00:13:28,800
I apologize for my tone of voice,
304
00:13:28,840 --> 00:13:30,680
and for the things I said.
305
00:13:30,700 --> 00:13:32,260
And now, as penance,
306
00:13:32,290 --> 00:13:34,820
I will get that skunk
out of your birdhouse.
307
00:13:36,330 --> 00:13:39,200
I don't care what you say, Marge.
We got to help him!
308
00:13:39,230 --> 00:13:40,730
I want to help him.
309
00:13:40,770 --> 00:13:43,400
Good, good. The ice
queen begins to thaw.
310
00:13:43,440 --> 00:13:46,570
Oh, Lord, give me a sign
you're still with me.
311
00:13:51,340 --> 00:13:53,310
Mm. Poor Ned.
312
00:13:53,340 --> 00:13:55,880
It really helps to eat your feelings.
313
00:13:55,910 --> 00:13:58,880
I've got it! I know what job Ned can do!
314
00:13:58,920 --> 00:14:02,450
Well, go tell him. He goes
to bed in five minutes.
315
00:14:02,490 --> 00:14:05,890
Ned, Ned! You should be what Jesus was!
316
00:14:05,920 --> 00:14:07,480
- A carpenter?
- No.
317
00:14:07,580 --> 00:14:08,760
- Fisherman?
- No.
318
00:14:08,790 --> 00:14:10,360
- Foot washer?
- No.
319
00:14:10,420 --> 00:14:11,890
- Wine creator?
- No.
320
00:14:11,930 --> 00:14:13,230
- Water walker?
- No.
321
00:14:13,260 --> 00:14:14,600
- Superstar?
- No.
322
00:14:14,630 --> 00:14:17,430
- Dashboard ornament?
- No! A teacher.
323
00:14:17,470 --> 00:14:19,270
I think you should be a teacher.
324
00:14:19,300 --> 00:14:20,900
Like Jesus.
325
00:14:20,940 --> 00:14:22,840
Lord, should I do it?
326
00:14:24,510 --> 00:14:26,710
And you shall receive it.
327
00:14:28,210 --> 00:14:31,480
He's looking right at us,
and he's not doing a thing!
328
00:14:31,600 --> 00:14:34,800
Duffman hates Duffmankind!
329
00:14:34,820 --> 00:14:36,800
Oh, yeah!
330
00:14:40,260 --> 00:14:44,420
♪ Up in the morning and out to school ♪
331
00:14:44,460 --> 00:14:47,890
♪ The teacher is teaching
the golden rule ♪
332
00:14:47,930 --> 00:14:50,960
- ♪ American history and practical math ♪
333
00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:52,970
♪ You studying hard... ♪
334
00:14:53,000 --> 00:14:56,270
I promised I wouldn't cry
on his first day of school.
335
00:14:56,300 --> 00:14:59,110
- [SNIFFLES]
- Let's play the frozen game.
336
00:14:59,140 --> 00:15:00,640
[BOTH GRUNT]
337
00:15:05,550 --> 00:15:08,160
So, rub-a-dub-dub, 30
kids and their sub.
338
00:15:08,220 --> 00:15:09,850
Let's be friends, shall we?
339
00:15:09,940 --> 00:15:12,040
KIDS [CHANTING]: Teacher,
teacher, you must quit.
340
00:15:12,070 --> 00:15:14,370
You can't teach us math or lit.
341
00:15:14,410 --> 00:15:16,810
There's no mercy in the bunch.
342
00:15:16,840 --> 00:15:19,480
We will make you leave by lunch.
343
00:15:19,510 --> 00:15:22,080
Martin Prince? Were you in on that poem?
344
00:15:22,110 --> 00:15:24,280
Oh, they paid me. A gig's a gig.
345
00:15:24,320 --> 00:15:25,980
Well, sir, I'm not scared off.
346
00:15:26,020 --> 00:15:28,020
I got two little wild things at home.
347
00:15:31,090 --> 00:15:33,760
Now, who can name the state capitals?
348
00:15:33,790 --> 00:15:36,190
- A dingus.
- [LAUGHTER]
349
00:15:36,230 --> 00:15:39,500
Well, in that case, I'm the
biggest dingus in the world.
350
00:15:39,530 --> 00:15:41,770
[LAUGHTER]
351
00:15:43,220 --> 00:15:47,190
Okay, then, let's give Mr.
Flanders a room 4F salute.
352
00:15:47,220 --> 00:15:49,560
[KIDS CLAMORING]
353
00:16:01,770 --> 00:16:04,340
Simpson, take the kill shot.
354
00:16:05,320 --> 00:16:06,740
Why me?
355
00:16:06,780 --> 00:16:09,840
- Prove your loyalty.
- My loyalty to what?
356
00:16:09,880 --> 00:16:11,910
To peer pressure.
357
00:16:16,250 --> 00:16:18,180
Bart Simpson, I know you...
358
00:16:18,220 --> 00:16:20,600
we've been fishing together,
we've gone to church together...
359
00:16:20,620 --> 00:16:23,920
and if you can fire that spit wad
after our long relationship,
360
00:16:23,960 --> 00:16:25,960
I don't deserve to be a teacher.
361
00:16:27,130 --> 00:16:28,900
Aah!
362
00:16:28,930 --> 00:16:30,400
[GROANS]: Oh.
363
00:16:30,430 --> 00:16:31,730
[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
364
00:16:31,770 --> 00:16:33,200
Last lesson, kids.
365
00:16:33,260 --> 00:16:36,870
"F" is for foolish and
failure and Flanders.
366
00:16:36,910 --> 00:16:38,400
You win.
367
00:16:42,580 --> 00:16:44,010
Yes?
368
00:16:44,050 --> 00:16:46,400
Look, what is your deal? Do you like me?
369
00:16:46,460 --> 00:16:48,010
Do you want to be like me?
370
00:16:48,050 --> 00:16:50,450
Lisa, I have something to show you.
371
00:16:50,490 --> 00:16:52,690
- What?
- I made you a little house.
372
00:16:52,720 --> 00:16:56,560
There's me praying. There's
you at the computer.
373
00:16:56,590 --> 00:16:58,790
I made you a saxophone
out of dried macaroni,
374
00:16:58,830 --> 00:17:01,630
and the crackers on the
roof... they're solar panels.
375
00:17:01,660 --> 00:17:03,560
Todd, I had you all wrong.
376
00:17:03,600 --> 00:17:07,570
You're a wonderful kid, and
I'm happy to call you my pal.
377
00:17:07,600 --> 00:17:11,000
So glad I have a friend. I'm
really sick of my brother.
378
00:17:11,080 --> 00:17:12,410
Okay, that's enough.
379
00:17:16,110 --> 00:17:17,640
What's the matter, Homer?
380
00:17:17,680 --> 00:17:20,410
[SIGHS] I think I ruined Flanders' life.
381
00:17:20,450 --> 00:17:23,250
- BART: Join the club.
- What are you doing here?
382
00:17:23,290 --> 00:17:26,090
I come here for a G&T...
gumball and talk.
383
00:17:28,320 --> 00:17:29,960
Here you go, pal.
384
00:17:33,090 --> 00:17:35,640
Listen, you've got to
apologize to Flanders.
385
00:17:35,720 --> 00:17:37,680
Why don't you apologize to Flanders?
386
00:17:37,720 --> 00:17:39,670
You're the one who prayed
for him to get fired.
387
00:17:39,700 --> 00:17:42,660
What? He should apologize
to me, because he...
388
00:17:42,800 --> 00:17:45,610
well, he... he makes me
feel so damn guilty!
389
00:17:45,640 --> 00:17:47,970
All right, I'll apologize, too.
390
00:17:48,980 --> 00:17:50,940
What's she doing here?
391
00:17:51,030 --> 00:17:53,160
Hello. She's my designated driver.
392
00:18:00,770 --> 00:18:02,370
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
393
00:18:02,410 --> 00:18:04,970
Hey, fellas. What brings you here?
394
00:18:05,010 --> 00:18:06,480
We came to say we're sorry,
395
00:18:06,510 --> 00:18:08,650
and we want you to go back to teaching.
396
00:18:08,680 --> 00:18:10,310
Oh, with all I've been through,
397
00:18:10,350 --> 00:18:13,150
I've never questioned
my faith until now.
398
00:18:13,180 --> 00:18:15,650
You spit-wadded my moustache, boy.
399
00:18:15,690 --> 00:18:17,890
I think you could be a great teacher.
400
00:18:17,920 --> 00:18:19,890
Almost as good as her.
401
00:18:21,540 --> 00:18:23,940
[SNIFFLES] Thank you, son.
402
00:18:23,980 --> 00:18:25,950
♪ ♪
403
00:18:25,980 --> 00:18:29,320
Remember, if you can
teach one kid one thing,
404
00:18:29,350 --> 00:18:31,450
then today will be a success.
405
00:18:31,490 --> 00:18:33,720
She never gave up.
406
00:18:33,820 --> 00:18:35,740
- Neither will I.
- Great.
407
00:18:35,780 --> 00:18:37,940
Now, this counts as a
parent-teacher conference
408
00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:39,380
and a Christmas concert.
409
00:18:39,440 --> 00:18:40,576
Well, that's all well and good,
410
00:18:40,600 --> 00:18:42,900
but I got to get those
kids to respect me.
411
00:18:42,930 --> 00:18:45,900
Do people respect God?
No, they fear him.
412
00:18:45,930 --> 00:18:49,840
It's never personal, just business.
413
00:18:49,870 --> 00:18:52,010
[THUNDER RUMBLING]
414
00:18:52,040 --> 00:18:54,240
Just leave everything to me.
415
00:18:54,280 --> 00:18:56,040
- [SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
- [WILLIE HUMMING]
416
00:18:56,080 --> 00:18:58,410
[KIDS CLAMORING]
417
00:18:58,450 --> 00:19:00,510
Listen up, children. If
you push hard enough
418
00:19:00,550 --> 00:19:03,760
on the pudding skin, there's a
tough cup of vanilla beneath.
419
00:19:03,800 --> 00:19:06,620
- Now take your seats.
- How you gonna make us?
420
00:19:06,660 --> 00:19:07,890
[BART HUMS]
421
00:19:10,420 --> 00:19:13,460
I won't. The good Lord will.
422
00:19:13,480 --> 00:19:16,330
- [KIDS EXCLAIMING]
423
00:19:16,360 --> 00:19:18,330
Haw... Huh?
424
00:19:18,370 --> 00:19:19,840
[WHIMPERS]
425
00:19:19,920 --> 00:19:23,840
The scariest thing is we
don't have a class skeleton!
426
00:19:23,960 --> 00:19:25,540
[SCREAMS]
427
00:19:25,570 --> 00:19:28,010
Truly, God is the biggest
bully of them all.
428
00:19:28,040 --> 00:19:29,540
KIDS: Amen.
429
00:19:33,480 --> 00:19:35,580
Now, Nelson, I'm not
gonna ask you to stand
430
00:19:35,620 --> 00:19:37,280
and read me a list of state capitals,
431
00:19:37,320 --> 00:19:39,790
but the good Lord might be pleased.
432
00:19:39,820 --> 00:19:44,100
Albany, Annapolis, Atlanta,
Augusta, Austin, Baton Rouge...
433
00:19:44,200 --> 00:19:45,360
[SCHOOL BELL RINGS]
434
00:19:45,390 --> 00:19:47,430
Does the Lord hear the bell up there?
435
00:19:47,460 --> 00:19:49,130
Yes, son, he does.
436
00:19:49,160 --> 00:19:51,160
[EXCITED CHATTER]
437
00:19:54,170 --> 00:19:56,040
Thank you, Bart. I knew deep within you,
438
00:19:56,070 --> 00:19:58,820
there was a good boy, and
I respectfully request
439
00:19:58,880 --> 00:20:00,970
that those be the last
two pranks you pull.
440
00:20:01,010 --> 00:20:03,010
You know it, man.
441
00:20:09,170 --> 00:20:10,530
FLANDERS: Wow, they're quiet.
442
00:20:10,570 --> 00:20:13,140
I'm reaching them. Edna was right.
443
00:20:13,270 --> 00:20:15,600
MILHOUSE: Hmm. Does
that cute school nurse
444
00:20:15,630 --> 00:20:16,890
know that I'm alive?
445
00:20:16,970 --> 00:20:20,330
Because last time I left her
office, I was legally dead.
446
00:20:20,360 --> 00:20:23,330
SHERRI: I have to beat
Terri to a training bra.
447
00:20:23,370 --> 00:20:25,670
BART: I wonder how much
I can sell Maggie for.
448
00:20:25,700 --> 00:20:28,660
HAMSTER: I'm starting to think
this wheel doesn't go anywhere.
449
00:20:28,740 --> 00:20:33,740
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