1 00:00:02,772 --> 00:00:04,610 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:10,722 --> 00:00:14,763 As we embark on the sacred task of choosing a new pontiff, 3 00:00:14,763 --> 00:00:17,301 let the Holy Spirit guide us. 4 00:00:17,301 --> 00:00:21,242 In nomine Patris et Filii et Spiritus Sancti. Amen. 5 00:00:21,342 --> 00:00:23,681 BART: The Doge of Venice sends his regards, 6 00:00:23,781 --> 00:00:25,083 you (bleep) papal stooge. 7 00:00:25,083 --> 00:00:27,321 Choke on your own junk, Petrucci. 8 00:00:27,321 --> 00:00:29,927 That'll teach you to exclude the Ecumenical Council, 9 00:00:29,927 --> 00:00:31,964 you (bleep) papist lapdogs. 10 00:00:32,064 --> 00:00:34,836 Throat cut. Head chop. Taste it. 11 00:00:34,836 --> 00:00:37,408 (bleep), (bleep), (bleep). 12 00:00:37,542 --> 00:00:38,511 (groans): Oh! 13 00:00:38,611 --> 00:00:40,582 Where did you learn to talk like that?! 14 00:00:40,682 --> 00:00:42,552 - Was it Selma? - Aw, honey, 15 00:00:42,552 --> 00:00:45,424 we're just worried that this bloody, potty-mouthed game 16 00:00:45,424 --> 00:00:48,698 - is turning your mind to... - To (bleep). 17 00:00:48,798 --> 00:00:50,033 Oh, fine. 18 00:00:50,133 --> 00:00:53,139 - Then can I play Future War: Death Guts? - No. 19 00:00:53,240 --> 00:00:55,344 Future War 2: Brain Carnage? 20 00:00:55,344 --> 00:00:56,279 No! 21 00:00:56,279 --> 00:00:57,716 But then what do I play? 22 00:00:57,816 --> 00:00:59,252 I have to play some game. 23 00:00:59,252 --> 00:01:01,489 Of course you do. 24 00:01:04,428 --> 00:01:06,901 MARGE: Do you like your new game, sweetie? 25 00:01:07,001 --> 00:01:09,573 - No. - Do you want to stop playing? 26 00:01:09,706 --> 00:01:11,242 - No. - Perfect. 27 00:01:11,342 --> 00:01:13,614 That's right in the video game sweet spot. 28 00:01:13,614 --> 00:01:16,152 I found that blocky game on a moms' group. 29 00:01:16,252 --> 00:01:19,292 It's an online world where you learn to help, share, 30 00:01:19,392 --> 00:01:22,999 and get virtual stickers for celebrating our differences. 31 00:01:22,999 --> 00:01:24,636 (groans) 32 00:01:24,736 --> 00:01:26,306 It's good for all ages, 33 00:01:26,406 --> 00:01:27,876 so I'm also letting Maggie play. 34 00:01:27,976 --> 00:01:29,546 Let me help you get set up. 35 00:01:29,546 --> 00:01:32,552 I downloaded the instructions and-- Oh. 36 00:01:32,652 --> 00:01:35,558 I guess giving you that thing to shut you up at restaurants 37 00:01:35,558 --> 00:01:37,394 really paid off. 38 00:01:38,430 --> 00:01:40,635 MILHOUSE: And these bushy eyebrows 39 00:01:40,735 --> 00:01:44,275 are the cherry on top of this hunk sundae. Uh-oh. 40 00:01:44,375 --> 00:01:46,145 My nose is glitching. 41 00:01:46,145 --> 00:01:49,151 Yeah, this stupid old computer is super glitchy. 42 00:01:49,151 --> 00:01:50,955 Why is the flat screen so thick? 43 00:01:51,055 --> 00:01:52,926 Is it also a microwave? 44 00:01:52,926 --> 00:01:55,765 Look, I bought this mohawk with Bobux. 45 00:01:55,765 --> 00:01:57,468 What the hell are Bobux? 46 00:01:57,468 --> 00:01:59,338 It's the money you use in the game. 47 00:01:59,438 --> 00:02:01,342 You buy it with your parents' credit card 48 00:02:01,442 --> 00:02:05,283 so you can get skins, costumes, wigs, 49 00:02:05,283 --> 00:02:07,354 even a dragon codpiece. 50 00:02:07,454 --> 00:02:09,291 BART: Ah, you're the only person on Earth 51 00:02:09,291 --> 00:02:11,362 who looks lamer in a mohawk. 52 00:02:11,462 --> 00:02:13,934 See if this rando will buy it. 53 00:02:14,068 --> 00:02:16,774 "I'll sell it for one Bobux." 54 00:02:17,742 --> 00:02:19,780 (cash register rings) 55 00:02:19,913 --> 00:02:21,115 MILHOUSE: Booyah! 56 00:02:21,215 --> 00:02:22,484 BART: Well, that's weird. 57 00:02:22,585 --> 00:02:24,455 You got the money, but you got another mohawk. 58 00:02:24,455 --> 00:02:26,827 See if you can sell it again. 59 00:02:26,827 --> 00:02:28,330 (cash register rings) 60 00:02:28,330 --> 00:02:29,833 BART: Another one. 61 00:02:29,933 --> 00:02:32,338 Whoa, it's like printing money. 62 00:02:32,338 --> 00:02:34,175 It's probably 'cause we're playing 63 00:02:34,175 --> 00:02:36,780 on this crappy old computer. 64 00:02:36,780 --> 00:02:38,951 Don't they have these same old (bleep) Colecos 65 00:02:39,051 --> 00:02:41,089 in the school computer lab? 66 00:02:41,189 --> 00:02:43,527 (chuckles): They're even older and more crappy. 67 00:02:43,627 --> 00:02:45,631 Then that glitch is gonna make us rich. 68 00:02:45,732 --> 00:02:48,804 All we need to do is round up a bunch of nerds. 69 00:02:48,904 --> 00:02:50,775 Nerds we got. 70 00:02:50,875 --> 00:02:53,313 - (video game music playing) - (cash registers ringing) 71 00:02:58,256 --> 00:03:00,160 (video game sound effects playing) 72 00:03:00,260 --> 00:03:01,830 Wow, Maggie. 73 00:03:01,964 --> 00:03:04,301 You really love this game, huh? 74 00:03:04,301 --> 00:03:06,573 So involving. Hmm. 75 00:03:06,673 --> 00:03:09,579 I'm gonna log in to see what's so fascinating. 76 00:03:11,149 --> 00:03:13,921 Brought you some strawberries and bananas. 77 00:03:14,790 --> 00:03:17,829 Oh, you like bananas but not strawberries. 78 00:03:17,829 --> 00:03:19,933 Good to know. Wait! 79 00:03:19,933 --> 00:03:22,639 You just talked! You're talking! 80 00:03:22,639 --> 00:03:25,277 With tiny pictures! Do it again. 81 00:03:25,377 --> 00:03:27,549 You hate broccoli. 82 00:03:27,549 --> 00:03:30,722 Oh, my God, we're having our first conversation. 83 00:03:30,722 --> 00:03:32,291 This is amazing. 84 00:03:32,391 --> 00:03:34,529 I'm talking to my baby. 85 00:03:34,629 --> 00:03:38,436 (gasps) Thank you, screen time. 86 00:03:40,273 --> 00:03:43,781 Skinner, your school's test scores made the paper. 87 00:03:43,781 --> 00:03:46,920 - Hmm? - The Chinese press is using them as proof 88 00:03:46,920 --> 00:03:50,862 of the decline of the American educational system. 89 00:03:52,832 --> 00:03:55,938 Well, we did have all that lead in the water fountain pipes. 90 00:03:56,038 --> 00:03:57,609 Oh, lead, lead, lead. 91 00:03:57,709 --> 00:03:59,278 Everything's always lead with you. 92 00:03:59,378 --> 00:04:01,015 This school is a train wreck. 93 00:04:01,015 --> 00:04:02,585 I want those numbers up, Seymour. 94 00:04:02,585 --> 00:04:05,323 Get me a PowerPoint presentation Monday. 95 00:04:05,424 --> 00:04:07,327 I'll have it done by Sunday night. 96 00:04:07,428 --> 00:04:09,365 Don't ruin my weekend. 97 00:04:10,133 --> 00:04:12,070 (sighs) Hmm. 98 00:04:12,070 --> 00:04:15,978 Strange, the download rate is 87 megabytes per second. 99 00:04:15,978 --> 00:04:17,782 We're paying for 91. 100 00:04:17,882 --> 00:04:18,851 Better check the router. 101 00:04:18,851 --> 00:04:20,454 Hmm? 102 00:04:20,555 --> 00:04:22,592 Why aren't you students in class? 103 00:04:22,692 --> 00:04:26,767 Um, we're playing Oregon Trail and no one's having a good time. 104 00:04:26,767 --> 00:04:29,438 Hmm. I don't see any oxen with dysentery. 105 00:04:29,438 --> 00:04:31,610 Milhouse, what's really going on here? 106 00:04:31,610 --> 00:04:33,647 We found a video game glitch that makes money 107 00:04:33,747 --> 00:04:36,954 and now Bart is the boss of a lucrative criminal enterprise! 108 00:04:37,054 --> 00:04:39,826 You want strawberries or Nutella? 109 00:04:39,826 --> 00:04:41,195 A crepe station? 110 00:04:41,295 --> 00:04:43,868 Simpson, you are staring down the barrel 111 00:04:43,968 --> 00:04:46,305 of a harshly-worded email to your parents. 112 00:04:46,405 --> 00:04:48,777 That I will follow up on. 113 00:04:48,777 --> 00:04:51,182 Seymour, walk with me. 114 00:04:51,282 --> 00:04:54,756 Well, I do need 9,000 more steps. 115 00:04:54,856 --> 00:04:57,427 I'm gonna be straight with you. We're printing money. 116 00:04:57,529 --> 00:05:00,635 Yes, I saw Hubert's Rolex fidget-spinner. 117 00:05:00,635 --> 00:05:04,375 Now, I know you'd never take any sketchy cash for yourself, 118 00:05:04,475 --> 00:05:07,347 but what if we gave this train wreck of a school 119 00:05:07,347 --> 00:05:09,118 a piece of the action? 120 00:05:09,218 --> 00:05:10,487 I wish people would stop 121 00:05:10,588 --> 00:05:12,224 calling this school a train wreck. 122 00:05:12,324 --> 00:05:13,561 (exclaims) 123 00:05:13,661 --> 00:05:15,130 (sighs) 124 00:05:15,130 --> 00:05:16,733 Everyone else sees Seymour Skinner 125 00:05:16,733 --> 00:05:19,873 as a broken-down sad-sack never-was in a cheap suit, 126 00:05:19,873 --> 00:05:23,614 but I see a broken-down sad-sack never-was in a cheap suit 127 00:05:23,614 --> 00:05:25,651 with a vision for this school, 128 00:05:25,651 --> 00:05:28,423 a vision he never dared tell anyone about. 129 00:05:28,524 --> 00:05:31,997 I do have a vision-- no, no, a desperate prayer-- 130 00:05:32,097 --> 00:05:34,001 that could save this school. 131 00:05:34,101 --> 00:05:36,305 Tell me everything. 132 00:05:37,407 --> 00:05:40,948 ♪ In my dream there's a theater ♪ 133 00:05:40,948 --> 00:05:44,421 ♪ A theater so cool ♪ 134 00:05:44,421 --> 00:05:47,027 ♪ They'll turn this dump ♪ 135 00:05:47,127 --> 00:05:50,535 ♪ Into a magnet arts school ♪ 136 00:05:50,535 --> 00:05:53,941 ♪ No testing to standardize ♪ 137 00:05:53,941 --> 00:05:56,980 ♪ When all the kids are "dolls" and "guys" ♪ 138 00:05:57,080 --> 00:05:59,953 ♪ Academic benchmarks cannot be exacting ♪ 139 00:05:59,953 --> 00:06:04,596 ♪ When all you teach is dance and acting ♪ 140 00:06:04,596 --> 00:06:07,835 ♪ If the baseball team's on a 12-game slide ♪ 141 00:06:07,835 --> 00:06:10,708 ♪ We're not athletes, that's a point of pride ♪ 142 00:06:10,708 --> 00:06:13,814 ♪ All you need is just one famous grad ♪ 143 00:06:13,814 --> 00:06:18,389 ♪ An Idina Menzel or even one Josh Gad ♪ 144 00:06:19,191 --> 00:06:21,964 ♪ No more STEM classes for this wide-eyed fool ♪ 145 00:06:21,964 --> 00:06:25,972 ♪ Only fails and passes when this dump becomes ♪ 146 00:06:26,974 --> 00:06:30,781 ♪ A magnet performing ♪ 147 00:06:30,881 --> 00:06:33,219 ♪ Arts ♪ 148 00:06:33,219 --> 00:06:38,764 ♪ School. ♪ 149 00:06:38,864 --> 00:06:39,966 Aah! 150 00:06:39,966 --> 00:06:41,570 (groans) I'm in. 151 00:06:46,012 --> 00:06:48,016 - (video game music playing) - (cash registers ringing) 152 00:06:56,566 --> 00:06:58,369 Giving all these kids computer lab passes 153 00:06:58,469 --> 00:07:00,608 for the rest of the term was a great idea. 154 00:07:00,708 --> 00:07:02,879 Too bad we can't work after-school hours. 155 00:07:03,012 --> 00:07:05,483 What if we say it's midnight basketball? 156 00:07:05,584 --> 00:07:09,258 Ooh, Skinner, who knew you were such a devil? 157 00:07:09,258 --> 00:07:11,362 Well, I learned from the best. 158 00:07:11,362 --> 00:07:13,867 - Or should I say, the worst? - (chuckles) 159 00:07:13,867 --> 00:07:17,107 So, how do you turn the game dollars into real dollars? 160 00:07:17,207 --> 00:07:18,343 We use the Bobux to buy cucumbers 161 00:07:18,343 --> 00:07:20,313 in the game Vegetable Crossing. 162 00:07:20,313 --> 00:07:21,750 Then brine those into Pickle Pesos, 163 00:07:21,750 --> 00:07:23,887 which convert ten-to-one in Delta miles, 164 00:07:23,887 --> 00:07:25,891 then use those to buy Panda Express gift cards, 165 00:07:25,992 --> 00:07:28,229 which you donate to Amnesty International, 166 00:07:28,329 --> 00:07:29,799 then you can sell the tax credits 167 00:07:29,799 --> 00:07:32,538 for cold, hard Danish kroner. 168 00:07:32,538 --> 00:07:35,143 (speaks Danish) 169 00:07:35,243 --> 00:07:36,880 MARGE: Now that we're finally talking, 170 00:07:36,880 --> 00:07:38,951 there are so many things I've been dying 171 00:07:38,951 --> 00:07:40,521 to chat with you about. 172 00:07:40,521 --> 00:07:42,424 Like, what's your favorite animal? 173 00:07:42,525 --> 00:07:44,428 Elephant! 174 00:07:44,529 --> 00:07:47,000 And what do you want to be when you grow up? 175 00:07:47,134 --> 00:07:49,606 An elephant doctor. 176 00:07:49,606 --> 00:07:51,342 Aw! 177 00:07:51,342 --> 00:07:53,479 (gasps) You love me. 178 00:07:53,479 --> 00:07:55,651 Oh, Maggie! 179 00:07:55,785 --> 00:07:58,691 Uh, Marge, you're in this game world all the time now, 180 00:07:58,791 --> 00:08:00,828 so I'm trying to dry my pants in the microwave. 181 00:08:00,928 --> 00:08:03,667 Should I set it on "potato" or "popcorn"? 182 00:08:03,667 --> 00:08:07,675 Homie, Maggie just said "I love you" to me. 183 00:08:07,675 --> 00:08:09,979 I never thought I'd hear it for the first time 184 00:08:10,080 --> 00:08:14,021 in a massively multiplayer online roleplaying game, 185 00:08:14,121 --> 00:08:16,660 but I'll never forget it. 186 00:08:16,660 --> 00:08:18,797 Wait, in this game Maggie can talk? 187 00:08:18,797 --> 00:08:21,402 There's so many things I've wanted to ask a baby. 188 00:08:21,402 --> 00:08:23,106 Why do you make eye contact when you poop? 189 00:08:23,206 --> 00:08:24,909 Do you remember when I lost you at Home Depot? 190 00:08:25,010 --> 00:08:27,648 Where do faces go during peekaboo? 191 00:08:27,648 --> 00:08:29,986 Maggie heart doughnut man? 192 00:08:29,986 --> 00:08:31,656 But I'm doughnut man! 193 00:08:31,656 --> 00:08:33,426 She loves me. She loves me! 194 00:08:33,426 --> 00:08:35,430 One of my three kids loves me! 195 00:08:35,430 --> 00:08:37,902 Whee...! 196 00:08:38,002 --> 00:08:39,438 (laughs) 197 00:08:39,539 --> 00:08:41,743 Stupid art school. 198 00:08:41,743 --> 00:08:42,545 (grunts) 199 00:08:42,645 --> 00:08:44,448 We're gonna have gum-proof floors, 200 00:08:44,448 --> 00:08:45,751 acoustics that make second graders 201 00:08:45,751 --> 00:08:47,320 sound like sixth graders. 202 00:08:47,421 --> 00:08:48,957 And the ceiling's gonna be so high, 203 00:08:48,957 --> 00:08:52,064 our resident opera ghoul won't bump his head on the rafters. 204 00:08:53,266 --> 00:08:54,903 Ouch! 205 00:08:55,003 --> 00:08:58,309 Seymour, where on earth did you find the money for this? 206 00:08:58,443 --> 00:09:01,082 Um, look at the parent donation thermometer. 207 00:09:01,182 --> 00:09:02,518 (chuckles) 208 00:09:02,618 --> 00:09:05,691 Ah, well, the thermometer doesn't lie. 209 00:09:06,727 --> 00:09:09,599 You wanted to see me, sir? 210 00:09:09,699 --> 00:09:12,538 - We both wanted to see you. - Martin, 211 00:09:12,538 --> 00:09:14,709 when you run a business, as we are, 212 00:09:14,709 --> 00:09:16,747 you need a product and a market 213 00:09:16,880 --> 00:09:18,617 and a workforce that isn't full of... 214 00:09:18,717 --> 00:09:21,690 - Jive-ass snitches. - I'm sorry? 215 00:09:21,790 --> 00:09:25,463 We've heard you're gonna sing to your parents about this... 216 00:09:25,463 --> 00:09:27,234 victimless thing of ours. 217 00:09:27,234 --> 00:09:31,342 I-I have signed a mutual honesty compact with them. 218 00:09:31,442 --> 00:09:33,413 Oh, look, your report card. 219 00:09:33,514 --> 00:09:35,316 Beautiful little A you've got here. 220 00:09:35,316 --> 00:09:36,787 (whimpers) 221 00:09:36,787 --> 00:09:39,425 Would be a shame if something happened to it. 222 00:09:39,526 --> 00:09:41,228 God, no! 223 00:09:41,362 --> 00:09:43,634 You sick bastard. 224 00:09:43,634 --> 00:09:47,542 Okay, okay. I'll keep your dirty video game secret. 225 00:09:47,542 --> 00:09:50,413 Oh, man is wolf to man. 226 00:09:50,514 --> 00:09:52,417 (cries) 227 00:09:52,518 --> 00:09:54,488 Skinner, are you feeling this? 228 00:09:54,488 --> 00:09:58,964 I know it's insane, but we're like a team. 229 00:09:59,064 --> 00:10:01,368 Working together, shared interests, 230 00:10:01,368 --> 00:10:02,972 we're more than a team. 231 00:10:02,972 --> 00:10:04,509 We're colleagues. 232 00:10:04,609 --> 00:10:06,245 Would you like to put your feet up on my desk 233 00:10:06,245 --> 00:10:08,182 as we daydream about our goals? 234 00:10:12,792 --> 00:10:14,261 (helicopter blades whirring) 235 00:10:14,261 --> 00:10:16,031 (chuckles) 236 00:10:16,031 --> 00:10:18,069 (both sigh) 237 00:10:21,776 --> 00:10:24,716 And top salesperson of the day goes to... 238 00:10:24,716 --> 00:10:27,788 Sherri, who unloaded 150 rainbow mohawks 239 00:10:27,788 --> 00:10:30,160 at ten Bobux a pop. 240 00:10:30,293 --> 00:10:31,897 (cheering) 241 00:10:31,997 --> 00:10:33,466 Couple more days like that, 242 00:10:33,567 --> 00:10:35,370 and you're getting the trip to Honolulu. 243 00:10:35,370 --> 00:10:36,338 (gasps) 244 00:10:36,438 --> 00:10:37,440 This is new. 245 00:10:37,440 --> 00:10:39,846 An ice cream truck. 246 00:10:39,846 --> 00:10:42,552 Wait, they're shooting ice cream at us. 247 00:10:42,652 --> 00:10:45,123 (grunting) 248 00:10:45,223 --> 00:10:47,728 BART: It's an ice cream drive-by. Run! 249 00:10:47,728 --> 00:10:49,431 (Milhouse panting) 250 00:10:49,532 --> 00:10:52,404 Oh, no. It's a trap. 251 00:10:53,740 --> 00:10:56,646 (Bart yells) 252 00:10:56,746 --> 00:10:58,851 Not unicorns. 253 00:10:58,851 --> 00:11:02,023 They're my second-favorite magical horse. 254 00:11:05,798 --> 00:11:07,935 JIMBO: "Boblox belongs to us." 255 00:11:07,935 --> 00:11:11,643 People, looks like we've got ourselves a turf war. 256 00:11:11,643 --> 00:11:13,947 (grunting) 257 00:11:19,726 --> 00:11:22,197 - Bad news, we've got competition. - Who? 258 00:11:22,197 --> 00:11:27,240 The Sunflower gang's IP address belongs to some place called... 259 00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:29,612 Limitless Frontier Horizons. 260 00:11:29,746 --> 00:11:30,848 Hmm, what do you know? 261 00:11:30,848 --> 00:11:33,352 The Montessori School. 262 00:11:41,536 --> 00:11:43,439 Check out the fancy groundskeepers. 263 00:11:43,439 --> 00:11:46,746 Those aren't groundskeepers. They're parent volunteers. 264 00:11:46,846 --> 00:11:49,552 Pay for tuition, then work for free. 265 00:11:49,652 --> 00:11:51,523 What a racket. 266 00:11:51,623 --> 00:11:53,392 (grumbles) 267 00:11:53,492 --> 00:11:55,430 Good morning, Principal Skinner. 268 00:11:55,531 --> 00:11:57,334 Hello, "kids-call-you-Sandra." 269 00:11:57,334 --> 00:11:59,471 Um... (clears throat) maybe you're not aware of this, 270 00:11:59,572 --> 00:12:01,810 but, uh, some of your students have been interfering 271 00:12:01,943 --> 00:12:05,450 with some of my kids', um, independent study project. 272 00:12:05,450 --> 00:12:09,324 Ooh, I'd love to help, but our curriculum is student-led. 273 00:12:09,424 --> 00:12:12,197 So if their passion is the monetization of coding errors, 274 00:12:12,297 --> 00:12:15,203 it's part of our core belief system that I support them. 275 00:12:15,303 --> 00:12:19,044 That's, uh, progressive school mumbo jumbo for "screw you." 276 00:12:19,144 --> 00:12:22,183 You can't tell me you want war with us. 277 00:12:22,317 --> 00:12:25,624 Um, well, "can't" is a word we don't use here. 278 00:12:25,624 --> 00:12:28,429 We also don't say "don't." We just can't. 279 00:12:28,530 --> 00:12:30,266 Are you even in charge? 280 00:12:30,366 --> 00:12:32,203 No! I just send out emails 281 00:12:32,203 --> 00:12:34,809 trying to convince parents there's a plan to all this. 282 00:12:34,909 --> 00:12:37,515 Oh, please come to our silent auction next week. 283 00:12:37,515 --> 00:12:39,552 One of our dads is Drake. 284 00:12:39,652 --> 00:12:41,856 He'll emcee but not perform. 285 00:12:41,990 --> 00:12:43,994 (sighs) That'll be all, Sandra. 286 00:12:43,994 --> 00:12:47,400 Oh, that is a really nice tower, Truth-Anne. 287 00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:49,404 Yeah, yeah, they're all nice. 288 00:12:49,505 --> 00:12:50,975 Let's take a walk. 289 00:12:51,075 --> 00:12:53,714 Let me show you what I've built here. 290 00:12:53,814 --> 00:12:56,185 From day one, these curiosity seekers have been told 291 00:12:56,185 --> 00:12:58,957 they can succeed at anything they set their mind to. 292 00:12:59,057 --> 00:13:01,428 Do you think you can win against that unbreakable, 293 00:13:01,563 --> 00:13:03,299 unearned self-confidence? 294 00:13:04,067 --> 00:13:07,107 Look, there's room in the Boblox scam for both of us. 295 00:13:07,240 --> 00:13:09,879 You take the gumdrop fields and teddy bear bouncy rooms. 296 00:13:09,979 --> 00:13:12,384 We keep the penguin fun land and the mushroom castles. 297 00:13:12,384 --> 00:13:16,358 Well, sharing is one of the habits of the heart. 298 00:13:16,458 --> 00:13:17,795 We accept. 299 00:13:17,795 --> 00:13:20,834 (chuckles) Can you excuse us for a moment? 300 00:13:22,972 --> 00:13:25,009 What the hell are you doing? 301 00:13:25,109 --> 00:13:27,013 What? We had to make a deal. 302 00:13:27,113 --> 00:13:29,952 With only half the money, there's no revolving stage, 303 00:13:29,952 --> 00:13:31,890 no flying wire harness system. 304 00:13:31,990 --> 00:13:33,894 Good luck doing Angels in America. 305 00:13:33,894 --> 00:13:35,898 We can't go to war with these psychos. 306 00:13:35,998 --> 00:13:37,768 Their self-esteem is off the charts. 307 00:13:37,868 --> 00:13:39,104 Take the deal. 308 00:13:39,204 --> 00:13:41,342 (groans) 309 00:13:42,110 --> 00:13:45,918 So, fellow lifelong learners, do we have an understanding? 310 00:13:46,018 --> 00:13:48,657 Yes, uh, we have an understanding. 311 00:13:48,757 --> 00:13:50,326 Understand this: 312 00:13:50,326 --> 00:13:53,466 "When you come at the king, you best not miss." 313 00:13:53,567 --> 00:13:56,271 (chuckles): You're going to quote The Wire to me? 314 00:13:56,271 --> 00:14:00,179 My dad directed three episodes in the dockyards season. 315 00:14:00,179 --> 00:14:03,085 That season was slow, and also: 316 00:14:03,219 --> 00:14:05,758 This. Is. War. 317 00:14:05,758 --> 00:14:07,060 (groans) 318 00:14:14,307 --> 00:14:16,546 Look, we can still get a deal with these guys. 319 00:14:16,546 --> 00:14:18,249 - Let's just go back in there and... - You're out. 320 00:14:18,349 --> 00:14:19,719 - What? - You don't have the stones 321 00:14:19,719 --> 00:14:21,589 for the mohawk trade. 322 00:14:21,723 --> 00:14:23,259 You can't fire me. 323 00:14:23,259 --> 00:14:25,764 You're right, people who are fired get a severance. 324 00:14:25,864 --> 00:14:27,635 You get nothing. 325 00:14:27,735 --> 00:14:29,839 This is my grift. I brought you in. 326 00:14:29,939 --> 00:14:31,676 It's all in the game, son. 327 00:14:31,676 --> 00:14:35,283 All in the video game game. 328 00:14:35,283 --> 00:14:37,822 Those self-esteem punks are gunning for us. 329 00:14:37,822 --> 00:14:39,992 I need a ruthless, bloodthirsty general. 330 00:14:40,126 --> 00:14:43,600 - Milhouse, you're up. - (spits, coughs) 331 00:14:43,600 --> 00:14:46,506 Me? But what about Bart? 332 00:14:46,506 --> 00:14:48,142 (scoffs) He's history, 333 00:14:48,142 --> 00:14:49,946 and this school doesn't teach history. 334 00:14:50,046 --> 00:14:52,417 Do it and you'll never have to play dodgeball again. 335 00:14:52,417 --> 00:14:55,924 And I get the pretty teacher for fifth grade. 336 00:14:56,024 --> 00:14:59,832 - Mrs. McCarthy? - You know who I'm talking about. 337 00:14:59,932 --> 00:15:02,237 Mm. Ms. Tanaka. 338 00:15:03,874 --> 00:15:05,944 Let's hit these sunflowers where it hurts. 339 00:15:05,944 --> 00:15:09,384 They steal our princess tiaras, we kill their unicorns. 340 00:15:09,519 --> 00:15:10,854 They strangle our gnomes, 341 00:15:10,854 --> 00:15:12,691 we glitter-bomb their pumpkin patch. 342 00:15:12,792 --> 00:15:14,662 So get out there and paint the streets 343 00:15:14,662 --> 00:15:16,900 with the blood of tomorrow's leaders. 344 00:15:16,900 --> 00:15:19,037 ASTRID AND FRENCH FRY: Let's talk Boblox! 345 00:15:19,171 --> 00:15:21,543 Hey, everybody! It's me, Astrid. 346 00:15:21,643 --> 00:15:23,547 And it's me, French Fry! 347 00:15:23,647 --> 00:15:25,316 - Hi, Astrid. - Hi, French Fry. 348 00:15:25,316 --> 00:15:27,788 Have you been seeing all this craziness in Boblox? 349 00:15:27,888 --> 00:15:29,424 It's so crazy. 350 00:15:29,424 --> 00:15:30,961 The Springfield kids were selling mohawks, 351 00:15:31,061 --> 00:15:32,965 but so were the Montessori Sunflower kids, 352 00:15:33,065 --> 00:15:34,535 so they got in a gang war. 353 00:15:34,535 --> 00:15:37,440 Everyone is being so grouchy, makes me sad. 354 00:15:37,440 --> 00:15:39,812 Check out what happened to the Springfield kids 355 00:15:39,912 --> 00:15:41,281 at the Candyland. 356 00:15:42,083 --> 00:15:44,321 I like bears, but this one looks mean. 357 00:15:44,321 --> 00:15:46,125 (growling) 358 00:15:46,125 --> 00:15:48,195 - Aah! - Ew. He was mean. 359 00:15:48,295 --> 00:15:50,233 You are always right about bears. 360 00:15:50,366 --> 00:15:52,203 Don't ever rip me in half, French Fry. 361 00:15:52,303 --> 00:15:54,842 (gasps) I would never, Astrid. 362 00:15:54,942 --> 00:15:56,746 BOTH: Online friends forever! 363 00:15:56,746 --> 00:15:59,417 Oh, look, it's a fashion show. 364 00:15:59,417 --> 00:16:01,255 I love fashion shows. 365 00:16:01,355 --> 00:16:03,827 This Nelson guy looks so cute in a vest. 366 00:16:03,827 --> 00:16:05,229 Cutie alert! 367 00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:10,439 Ouch. That Sunflower kid is stabbing him. 368 00:16:10,541 --> 00:16:11,509 Stabbing's for jerks. 369 00:16:11,609 --> 00:16:13,345 The Springfield gang is getting wiped out. 370 00:16:13,445 --> 00:16:16,418 Astrid, why are candy canes only for Christmas? 371 00:16:16,519 --> 00:16:17,855 Great question. 372 00:16:17,955 --> 00:16:19,692 Subscribers, post your theories. 373 00:16:19,826 --> 00:16:21,563 No racist stuff, you guys. 374 00:16:21,663 --> 00:16:23,432 BOTH: Bye! 375 00:16:25,269 --> 00:16:28,743 HOMER: We did it. We made our house in Boblox. 376 00:16:29,745 --> 00:16:32,751 Aw, I wish Lisa were here, too. 377 00:16:32,852 --> 00:16:34,956 Guys, you've been in this game so long 378 00:16:34,956 --> 00:16:36,291 that, out in the real world, 379 00:16:36,391 --> 00:16:38,663 the lawn is overgrown, Bart bought a Lexus, 380 00:16:38,763 --> 00:16:41,569 and I had to go to my own parent-teacher conference. 381 00:16:41,569 --> 00:16:45,409 Turns out I'm a joy to have in class and I might need glasses. 382 00:16:45,409 --> 00:16:48,617 Guess what, honey. Maggie talks in here. 383 00:16:49,484 --> 00:16:53,627 Whoa, Maggie, you're communicating using only emojis, 384 00:16:53,627 --> 00:16:56,198 like an old person trying to act like a teenager. 385 00:16:56,198 --> 00:16:59,605 Ha! And, Dad, you're not at Moe's? 386 00:16:59,705 --> 00:17:01,141 Why would I be at Moe's 387 00:17:01,141 --> 00:17:03,245 when we can play volleyball with my head? 388 00:17:03,345 --> 00:17:04,347 (grunts) 389 00:17:05,116 --> 00:17:07,420 - Whee! - (laughter) 390 00:17:07,555 --> 00:17:10,661 Who would have thought that our family would be happiest 391 00:17:10,661 --> 00:17:12,463 inside a video game? 392 00:17:12,565 --> 00:17:15,203 HOMER: It's heaven, and it's all from the comfort 393 00:17:15,303 --> 00:17:18,309 of my real-life toilet. 394 00:17:22,116 --> 00:17:25,657 ♪ My dream of a theater ♪ 395 00:17:25,657 --> 00:17:28,329 ♪ Has turned out so cool ♪ 396 00:17:28,429 --> 00:17:33,339 ♪ The moment has come for my magnet ♪ 397 00:17:33,339 --> 00:17:38,650 ♪ Performing arts school. ♪ 398 00:17:39,417 --> 00:17:41,154 We're getting butchered everywhere! 399 00:17:41,154 --> 00:17:43,660 Good God. What about our revenue stream? 400 00:17:43,760 --> 00:17:45,831 They've taken it all. 401 00:17:49,037 --> 00:17:51,141 Hmm. I'm gonna show these kids 402 00:17:51,141 --> 00:17:54,080 something they have no idea exists: 403 00:17:54,180 --> 00:17:56,451 the real world! 404 00:17:57,721 --> 00:17:58,723 (grunts) 405 00:17:58,823 --> 00:18:00,226 Ah, stupid Skinner. 406 00:18:00,359 --> 00:18:01,930 I'm done trying to make money out of nothing. 407 00:18:02,030 --> 00:18:03,934 I'm going all in on NFTs. 408 00:18:04,034 --> 00:18:05,771 (phone chimes) 409 00:18:09,044 --> 00:18:10,814 (groans) 410 00:18:10,914 --> 00:18:13,520 (gasps) Apathetic face emoji? 411 00:18:17,795 --> 00:18:20,366 Arts school! 412 00:18:20,466 --> 00:18:23,205 He's destroyed the community wasabi garden. 413 00:18:23,205 --> 00:18:25,176 He's heading for the computer lab. 414 00:18:25,176 --> 00:18:27,581 What kind of nurturing is this? 415 00:18:29,885 --> 00:18:30,988 Whoa, whoa, whoa. 416 00:18:30,988 --> 00:18:33,292 Out of my way. 417 00:18:33,292 --> 00:18:35,096 Don't do this, Seymour. 418 00:18:35,196 --> 00:18:36,532 Oh, I'm doing it. 419 00:18:36,633 --> 00:18:39,672 If I crush their computer lab, we beat these psychos. 420 00:18:39,672 --> 00:18:42,845 Look at yourself. You're about to bulldoze a school. 421 00:18:42,845 --> 00:18:45,617 They took Daddy's money... 422 00:18:45,717 --> 00:18:47,721 (engine revving) 423 00:18:47,721 --> 00:18:49,357 ...and I'm the daddy! 424 00:18:49,357 --> 00:18:52,731 What's happening? We're in unchartered school territory. 425 00:18:52,831 --> 00:18:54,434 (clucks) 426 00:18:54,434 --> 00:18:56,271 I've spent the best years of your life 427 00:18:56,271 --> 00:18:58,275 trying to drive you insane, 428 00:18:58,275 --> 00:19:00,112 and now I don't want that. 429 00:19:00,112 --> 00:19:02,283 This isn't you. You're not a psycho. 430 00:19:02,283 --> 00:19:05,256 You're lame, like unfrosted cornflakes. 431 00:19:05,356 --> 00:19:07,393 But I want to be Lucky Charms. 432 00:19:07,393 --> 00:19:10,567 It's okay. Corn Flakes is a surprisingly good cereal. 433 00:19:10,667 --> 00:19:13,172 But crushing this kombucha academy, 434 00:19:13,272 --> 00:19:15,142 that'll ruin your life. 435 00:19:15,242 --> 00:19:17,581 And being partners with you has made me realize 436 00:19:17,681 --> 00:19:19,919 you're... a human being. 437 00:19:19,919 --> 00:19:21,154 No, I'm not. 438 00:19:21,254 --> 00:19:23,626 You are. Walk away. 439 00:19:23,626 --> 00:19:26,365 But I already rented the costumes for Seussical. 440 00:19:27,333 --> 00:19:29,004 It was never meant to be. 441 00:19:29,104 --> 00:19:31,174 But... Josh Gad. 442 00:19:31,274 --> 00:19:32,845 Josh Gad is not real. 443 00:19:32,845 --> 00:19:34,447 He never was. 444 00:19:34,447 --> 00:19:37,654 (sighs) Right, of course he's not. 445 00:19:39,157 --> 00:19:42,430 (backup alarm beeping) 446 00:19:42,430 --> 00:19:44,735 Maybe there's a teachable moment here. 447 00:19:44,835 --> 00:19:48,777 In a sense, the bulldozer is Anglo-Saxon privilege. 448 00:19:48,910 --> 00:19:50,279 You're fired, Sandra. 449 00:19:50,279 --> 00:19:52,316 Oh, thank you! 450 00:19:52,417 --> 00:19:54,755 Come on, let's head to Krusty Burger. 451 00:19:54,755 --> 00:19:56,258 I'll buy you a shake 452 00:19:56,258 --> 00:19:58,195 and you can tell me about your other stupid dreams 453 00:19:58,295 --> 00:19:59,598 that will never happen. 454 00:19:59,598 --> 00:20:02,504 No, Bart, I'm done living in a fantasy world, 455 00:20:02,604 --> 00:20:06,178 because a fantasy world is no place to live. 456 00:20:06,311 --> 00:20:08,182 Sorry to bother you, neighborinos, but, uh, 457 00:20:08,315 --> 00:20:10,721 the newspapers have been stacking up on your porch. 458 00:20:10,721 --> 00:20:13,793 I just thought I'd peek in and give you a lookie-loo. 459 00:20:15,496 --> 00:20:17,534 Hello? 460 00:20:22,076 --> 00:20:23,813 Mm... 461 00:20:24,949 --> 00:20:26,986 (whimpers) 462 00:20:27,755 --> 00:20:29,491 Captioning sponsored by 20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION 463 00:20:29,491 --> 00:20:31,294 and FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY 464 00:20:31,294 --> 00:20:32,931 and TOYOTA. 465 00:20:32,931 --> 00:20:35,002 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 466 00:20:39,578 --> 00:20:41,783 ("Way Down in the Hole" by The Blind Boys of Alabama playing) 467 00:20:43,620 --> 00:20:47,594 ♪ If you walk through the garden ♪ 468 00:20:47,594 --> 00:20:50,901 ♪ You better watch your back ♪ 469 00:20:51,602 --> 00:20:54,775 ♪ Well, I beg your pardon ♪ 470 00:20:54,775 --> 00:20:58,415 ♪ Walk a straight and narrow track ♪ 471 00:20:59,384 --> 00:21:02,356 ♪ If you walk with Jesus ♪ 472 00:21:03,459 --> 00:21:07,066 ♪ He'll save your soul ♪ 473 00:21:07,166 --> 00:21:10,239 ♪ You gotta keep the devil ♪ 474 00:21:10,239 --> 00:21:13,713 ♪ Down in the hole ♪ 475 00:21:13,847 --> 00:21:17,120 ♪ All the angels sing ♪ 476 00:21:17,220 --> 00:21:20,560 ♪ About Jesus' mighty sword ♪ 477 00:21:20,660 --> 00:21:25,302 ♪ And they'll shield you with their wings ♪ 478 00:21:25,436 --> 00:21:29,010 ♪ Keep you close to the Lord. ♪ 479 00:21:29,110 --> 00:21:31,047 Shh!