NARRATOR: The family are reeling from Jamie's suicide
and his random bequest of 20% of the company
to Colin Morris, the factory foreman.
Crane has left Franklyn and come back
to look after Douglas Motors.
[solemn music]
Good luck then, Tommy.
I'll be back.
Exquisite.
ROBERT: And so life goes on.
I know we all welcome Colin onto the board, as I do.
And, uh, I wouldn't want anyone to think that the manner
in which this has come about--
Jamie and so on--
makes any difference.
Right.
That's it.
Thank you.
Kleber's Bank, personnel department.
Hang on.
I'll enquire.
Stephen Crane still work here?
He left about four months ago.
I'm afraid Mr. Crane left the bank's
employ about four months ago.
Sorry.
Shit.
We haven't had much of a chance
for a chat during the last few weeks, have we?
Uh, first of all, what I said in the meeting today was true.
I must say, I hadn't realized you must have been very close--
you and Jamie.
Yeah, we got on, you know.
Yeah.
You know, he always--
he always baffled me, then and now.
Bit of a dark horse.
Good lad.
You know, what I want to ask you--
um, of course, you had no idea he was going to, you know,
do what he did.
What I wanted to ask you was if you knew--
if you knew why.
Why?
- Yeah. - No.
No idea, really.
I gave him a paperweight on his birthday.
I can't think of anything else.
Paperweight?
Yeah.
Yeah, a blue one.
Oh, why?
No, I don't know.
I thought you meant that--
no, no, it was just a terrible shock.
I'm sorry.
He asked me to pay you back what he owed you--
Jamie-- from the shares.
Look, um, I best be getting back, I reckon.
PENNY: Sorry to interrupt, Stephen.
Can I have a word?
Help yourself.
PENNY: It may not be the time to talk about this--
But?
A hypothetical situation--
after Dad, Colin is now the biggest shareholder.
That's not hypothetical.
No, but I want to know what would happen
if Colin sold his shares.
I'd be very surprised if he did.
Yes, but?
Well, Colin would be a very eligible bachelor.
And 20% of this place would hit the market.
[mimics explosion]
The price would slump at first, then go up with all the buyers.
PENNY: And would there be?
Oh, yeah.
This place is a license to print money now.
PENNY: Tell me who'd be interested.
Terrible tragedy, his son.
Of course, of course.
However, the shares--
This chap, Morris--
his family have worked metal there for three generations.
You'll find him unresponsive to approaches, I think.
Until we offer him money, perhaps?
I think in such awful circumstances,
it would not be tasteful to approach this man.
We'll observe a period of mourning for the family.
Naturally.
I'm afraid I should be away for a couple of days.
Our business will be in able hands, however.
So long as they don't belong to that dreary fop,
Garfield-Ward.
I had hoped that my daughter's propensity
to throw herself at idiots would disappear
when she began work here.
Still, it's not entirely your fault. Jimmy.
Tom.
PIERS: Good morning, sir.
Hmm.
PIERS: He seems to have taken a dislike to me.
A protective father, Piers.
A man of whim and sentiment.
Next week he'll be hugging you to his bosom
to the drone of balalaikas.
Now, Piers, if I could drag you away
from the enthralling subject of yourself just for a second.
Stebbings!
For the first time, Piers, over half the shares
are out of Douglas hands.
The empire crumbles.
And you want me to paw through the rubble.
Shall I tell you what I think, Piers?
I think Franklyn is a sentimental dolt.
Oh? Why?
Hark.
Don't you hear it?
That far off trampling sound is the man, Morris, stampeding
to cash in his good fortune.
PIERS: You know this?
20% of Douglas Motors is a lot of side
room wood blinds, Piers.
Can you imagine Franklyn's gratitude when we
finally secure him his fetish?
At a price, of course.
Will you be away long, sir?
Two days, so bring forward your monthly inspection
and speak to this Morris.
Heathrow-- quickly.
[metal clinking]
[floor creaking]
I-- I was thinking while I was away.
I thought I warned you about that.
Listen, when-- when Jamie--
why did you come back?
Because I didn't want to lose our bet.
50 quid that I wouldn't walk out before six months, remember?
And because I felt sorry for your father.
And because I think I love you.
Stephen, you said it.
I know, but I bet I say that to all the girls.
Couple of yobs just smashed some windows
down at the factory, so I'm going to take a look.
I'll see you later, little devils.
Come on, you must remember.
Jo what?
[tv chatter]
Think about what she looked like,
what the weather was like when you
met her, what street it was.
[key rattling]
[door creaking open]
WEATHERMAN (ON TV): --from the satellite picture,
looming down to the southwest.
Yeah.
WEATHERMAN (ON TV): There are clearer skies--
All right.
Well, keep trying.
[ominous music]
JAMIE (VOICEOVER): The lads at the factory
think I'm clocking in from another planet, don't they?
Hmm?
So do you.
I just know it's not working out here anymore, Dad.
I was thinking of going away for a bit,
but I promise you I won't leave the country.
[hopeful music]
Perhaps it's a culture shock.
I just know it's not working out here anymore.
It's just that this time I'll leave here with your blessing.
I think it'd be easier for both of us, really.
Is that your blessing, Dad?
I want your blessing-- your blessing--
your blessing-- your blessing--
ROBERT: [sobbing]
[moaning]
[sobbing]
Bed.
[phone ringing]
Yeah?
MAN (ON TV): --just bursting with vitality.
Franklyn.
Jo Franklyn.
Come on.
We'll be late.
[footsteps]
I saw your father today.
From a distance, I hope.
He called me a dreary fop.
He didn't.
PIERS: And an idiot.
[phone ringing]
Jo Franklyn.
I'm sorry to bother you.
I'm a friend of Stephen Crane's.
I was wondering if you had his new address.
Uh, who is this?
My name's Tommy.
Have we met?
TOMMY (ON PHONE): No.
I didn't know he had any friends left.
How do you know him?
TOMMY (ON PHONE): From the old days.
What's his middle name?
Dexter.
JO (ON PHONE): Favorite animal?
None.
JO (ON PHONE): Favorite food?
Cold baked beans and ice cream.
All right, then.
Have you got a pen?
[ominous chord]
[door knocker]
SONYA: Hi.
Hi.
Oh, I'll take this. - Mwah.
Hello, Colin.
How are you doing?
All right, Gavin.
I'll tell Mum later.
Here's the address.
Come and visit tomorrow, will you?
Promise?
All right?
Are you sure about this?
No.
Oh.
I'm completely, absolutely, utterly certain.
OK?
Mmm.
[laughter]
Sorry.
I'm making rather a habit of calling these meetings.
Definitely the last one, I promise.
What I have to say may surprise you,
but I have given it a great deal of thought.
I have decided to retire from the management of this company.
As of now Stephen will be managing director.
Unless there are any objections?
I think he's bloody mad.
I don't.
He's had enough for now.
Anyone can see that.
Oh, it's not his giving it up that bothers me.
It's giving it up to you.
No offense, Stephen, but--
People always say that when they're about to offend me.
I know I haven't been working here as long as you have,
but I do give a hell of a damn.
Tori doesn't, and that's OK.
Hey.
I know Dad doesn't, and that's OK, too!
But I do!
So I want two things from you.
One-- loyalty.
You own 1% of this company, possibly
the crucial deciding 1%.
My, you have changed.
[heavy exhale]
[sniff]
Hey.
Look, I promise.
Sorry.
That's OK.
And number two?
We all know about your past--
the embezzlement, the insider dealing, et cetera.
I want to know, is that the end of it all?
No more nasty shocks on the way?
I'll let you know well in advance.
I promise.
Stephen, a visitor.
Hello, Stephen.
Aren't you going to introduce us?
Victoria, this is Thomas, my brother.
Thomas, that was Victoria Douglas.
I'm sorry for this.
What the hell are you doing here?
TOMMY: What's the matter, Derek?
Aren't you pleased to see me?
You're not supposed to out for another--
Six months.
Good behavior. I wrote.
You'd moved.
Yeah, well, things went wrong.
I can see that.
I like it here.
It looks a bit of a dump to me.
Yeah, well, it just so happens that I'm
managing director of this dump.
And I'd like to keep it that way for now.
Fancy that.
The black sheep of the family, managing director.
Tommy, there are no white sheep in our family.
It's Dad, Derek.
Don't call me Derek.
If that gets out around here, I am dead meat.
While I've been away, he's got himself into trouble again.
Gambling?
Really bad this time, though.
Anyway, he was into the bookies and getting deeper,
so he had an idea.
Don't tell me.
He borrowed off this private finance company
to pay them off.
I told you not to tell me.
Well, with me inside and you not talking to him,
there wasn't a lot of sane advice around.
Yeah, but paying off a bookie with a loan shark?
God.
He's old enough to know better.
Well, he's old.
All right.
How much?
COLIN: How much?
Well, I don't know.
The last thing we want to do is mess around with something
which already works.
We saw Douglas Motors as a great investment opportunity.
That's why we stuck half a million
into it when no one else would.
Yeah, that saved our arse all right.
PIERS: And that's why we were so keen for Stephen Crane
to work here.
We've known him for years, built up a unique kind of trust.
So, uh, what is it you want these shares for, again?
Well, if Douglas Motors is a success,
the value of our investment goes up.
That's our business.
It's simple.
Yeah, yeah, it is simple.
Look, I'll, uh, talk to the family.
If they say, OK, it's a deal.
Just sign this.
If you change your mind, I'll tear it up.
STEPHEN: Markus, something's come up.
I've got to go away for a bit.
Well, where can we get a hold of you?
Coventry.
Well, that's helpful.
Thanks.
Where's Robert and Victoria?
Robert went ages ago.
Victoria waited for you to come back for awhile
and then stormed off looking pretty pissed off.
[machine whirring]
PENNY: Now what I'm after is that.
So if you do a big close-up of the radiator
and then come in tight on the logo, right?
Is Robert still at home?
As far as I know.
So when are you off?
Sorry?
Excuse me.
You're selling up and clearing off.
That's what you've come to tell me, isn't it?
I've had a great offer from Kleber's for the shares.
Well, I'm sure we can't afford to match it,
so I suggest you accept. - Look, Penny--
It's all right.
No, it is not all right.
I have always, always wanted to be my own boss, right?
To have me own place.
Because me dad and me grandad put
near 90 years into this place--
you know, between them.
And in the end--
I know.
It's all right.
I'll tell Dad.
I'm sure he'll understand.
TV ANNOUNCER (ON TV): As they approach the first,
it's Northern Babe from Welsh Wizard
and Canadian Kev with Gritty's Folly close up in form.
And Skidmark looks to be in a bit of trouble in last place.
Tommy Love for Mrs. McIvor.
TV ANNOUNCER (ON TV): They jumped the first.
And Northern Babe has fallen and almost brought down Friar Tuck,
which has left Canadian Kev in the lead
And as the rear of the field--
MRS. MCIVOR: Mr. Love.
Oh, it's John Love.
Cup of tea, boys?
No, thanks.
Oh, he started off quite well.
Not quite so entertaining a tale as time went on.
I thought that was the idea.
Mr. Love, we are a service.
We aim to alleviate distress-- financial distress.
When folk need money, we give it to them.
And if folk can't pay it back, then you
give it to them as well.
Don't you, Mrs. McIvor?
MRS. MCIVOR: It seems like your father, in all his wisdom--
How much?
That's the current state of the account.
This figure.
670--
Percent.
Interest.
Thank you, Mrs. McIvor.
[footsteps]
We'll be back.
Oh, I do hope so.
TOMMY: It can't be legal.
STEPHEN: Yes, it can.
What a dickhead.
He's been robbing Peter to pay off Paul for years.
What were you doing?
TOMMY: Oh, that's rich coming from you.
I didn't ask you to be sent down for passing bent checks.
No, it was just a mad, selfish whim on my part.
There's only one way I can get any money.
I have to sell my shares in the company.
Oh, Derek, how ghastly for you.
I am sorry.
It was a promise.
What about the old man?
It's only money.
Yeah, well, that's easy for you to say-- it's only money.
I earn it, he spends it you lose it-- same as it ever was.
What's come over you?
I just hate selling people who like me down the toilet
to save someone who doesn't.
Well, where are you going?
I'll sort something out later.
He's been threatened.
Last week, the door was kicked in.
Nothing else.
When he got there, it was just swinging on its hinges.
They're animals, and he is not well.
So we don't have time for you to sort something out later.
And now I'm going to drag you back home to prove it.
And while we're there, you can sort
out this thing between you.
What's the point?
I've been disowned, remember?
Your usual?
Take a seat. - Why?
Don't you-- BOTH: Like them?
[chuckling]
Sorry I yapped at you earlier.
I just want to sort this out.
I'm unaware of a problem.
Dad, look.
At school, me and Antonia were the only girls who--
Antonia and I. We clearly wasted the fee.
I never ever had any pocket money.
FRANKLYN: Well, independence is a great gift.
And shoplifting was not the answer.
JOANNA: So don't you think it's time
you gave us our independence?
I am 26.
And as frightful a judge of character as you were at 14.
Ah.
This always costs me money.
You liked Stephen, didn't you?
Eventually.
Admittedly, yeah.
But you will concede your track record has
hardly been encouraging, hmm?
That Sir Clive, the feeble Piers.
What has Piers ever done to you?
Go on.
Name two things.
PIERS: What?
He said what?
JOANNA: Blake said that you are responsible for screwing
up Douglas Motors for him.
Good grief.
That's the trouble with Dad, really.
He's awfully inclined to listen to the last person
that tells him anything.
Best to catch him in the final nanosecond
before he makes a decision.
Astonishing, really, that a man so fundamentally gullible
can get to be so fundamentally rich.
But there you are--
fathers.
Piers?
Hmm?
What was the last thing I said?
I don't think Jimmy deserves Douglas Motors.
Drink, Pen?
Don't mind if I do.
Tori?
VICTORIA: A large one.
What else is there?
Something funny happened at work today.
There are some interesting role reversals
in this family these days.
Slippers, dear.
(MASCULINE VOICE) Slippers, dear.
Shut up, will you?
Sorry.
I had a bit of a shock today myself.
Oh?
Found out why Stephen acts as if he's got something to hide.
Don't tell me.
He's got something to hide.
How very predictable of him.
Wife and seven kids?
I won't ask.
Dad.
Good.
You can hear the news.
That Morris bastard-- that's unfair.
Colin is leaving us.
Sold his whack this afternoon.
What?
That was quick.
Heading off for a life of cocaine
and Filipino handmaidens?
Garage in Litchford.
Well?
I'll be downstairs if you want me.
Well, I want to know what the hell this means for us.
And Stephen can tell me.
Apparently, he's gone to Coventry,
but we don't know where, do we?
No.
But I know where to start.
Toad went up to town by an early train this morning.
And he has ordered a large and very expensive motor car.
Ready for bed now, please, boys.
Good night, Grandpa.
Night-night, darling.
Good night, Grandpa.
Sleep well.
Now you've retired, you should hire
yourself out with that book as a babysitter cum sedative.
Took me ages to find.
I'd forgotten where it was.
I remember you reading it years ago.
You know, this particular tome has a long and ancient history.
With this very edition, I scored an undefeated century
in the 1942 inter-house book cricket match.
Do you know, I think I realized something just now--
about Jamie.
It was when you said upstairs about Colin
going to buy his own garage.
It suddenly struck me.
You see, Jamie had this profound dislike of money and of paper.
And his giving it all away to Colin,
well, it was just Jamie's way of transforming worthless paper
into something real.
Out of this whole mess, something real.
No, I think I rather admire that.
Yeah.
[sniffing]
Look, you can still see a ball mark.
Tada!
All right, who's paying for it?
He's got a job in a friend's antique shop.
COLIN: And you?
Well, I'm thinking about it.
Hopefully, we won't be here that long anyway.
Oh?
Yeah.
I've been thinking about going abroad--
Australia.
Oh, yeah?
Gavin been thinking about it, too
All in good time.
Coffee?
No, I think I need something stronger.
Bad news?
I got the garage.
Colin, I didn't think you'd do it!
Oh, I'm so happy!
Lend us a tenner. - No, come on.
I'm buying.
It seems we've got a lot to talk about.
Where is he tonight, anyway?
Tying up loose ends, so he said.
Nah nah na nah nah!
You can't catch us!
[growling]
You can't catch us!
GAVIN: [inaudible]
[laughter]
There is no escape from the devil.
You can't catch us!
PENNY: What the hell are you doing here, Gavin?
Penny--
Don't you bloody touch them.
Go and watch telly. Now, go on.
Please.
How bloody dare you come back like this?
(WHISPERING) For god sake, keep your voice down.
Because the kids will hear?
Or the neighbors?
Well, I have news for you, Gavin.
There is no point in us keeping our voices down anymore
because everybody knows.
Look, I didn't come back for this, Penny.
Everybody knows that our marriage is
a wreck because you had to screw every girl in the village
until you--
Penny!
--until you finally found one you
liked enough to leave us for.
I came--
I came back to say that I was sorry about Jamie.
Where are you living now, anyway?
Oh! Never mind.
Stephen been looking after you?
Oh, god.
I can just hear it now.
I'm off with some crumpet, Stephen,
so take care of the old lady for me, will you?
Stephen Crane Limited-- replacement
husband, replacement son, replacement bloody everything.
God, you are hopeless!
How's Robert?
As well as can be expected under the circumstances.
And Victoria?
Wouldn't you like to know how Victoria is?
Jesus, Penny.
And I'm fine.
So if that's all--
No, that's not all.
What are we going to do about them?
Bonnie is still my lawyer.
Do you still have keys to this place, by the way?
Look, they are my children too.
I'm just trying to--
Get out!
Please, please, please, just leave me alone!
Please.
TOMMY: Sight for sore eyes, eh?
Go on there, kid.
I don't know what I'm going to do yet.
About the money.
So if he calls you a naughty word,
you'll leave him in the shit?
You are a saint.
Oh, forget the bloody shares.
Just go and talk to him.
Just try.
It'd be good, the three of us together again.
Arguing, like the old days?
I'll come with you.
What's the matter, Derek?
Don't you trust me?
[sad music]
You need a bell.
TV ANNOUNCER (ON TV): --out there by [inaudible]..
Inside sweep!
He's got the legs of [inaudible]..
And he goes outside him--
Got a couple of beers, then, Dad.
JOHN: Watch your head, now, Derek.
All right?
A bit shook up, eh?
STEPHEN: What's the film?
JOHN: Some rubbish.
[gunshot on tv]
I think it's "Coventry Villa."
What's the score?
I'm not allowed to score.
Cheers, son.
[tv chatter]
[beer top popping]
So, what's your name now, then?
Still Stephen Crane.
We're very happy together.
I'm surprised you haven't got bored with that one by now.
Let's see.
You've been Stephen Crane almost--
hmm, must be nine years now.
Come January I'm thinking of having a party.
Well, I'm busy in January.
I don't know what the bloody hell you're doing here.
And if you keep on shouting, you're not likely to find out,
are you?
JOHN: I don't want to know.
So what am I supposed to do, eh?
Go down like Tommy, just so you can call me Derek again
in front of the neighbors?
Oh, don't get me wrong.
I'm delighted.
Son of mine breaks the law and gets caught.
Who wouldn't be proud?
You couldn't be satisfied with that, could you?
Oh, no.
You've got to go and change your name.
Get a job in a bank.
Forget the name.
[beer hitting table]
It's not about that, is it?
Isn't it?
I can't call you Stephen Crane, can I?
It might be all right for you-- lying every day to everyone
you meet.
Dad!
JOHN: But I can't do it.
All those boring rules--
number one.
Justifying yourself.
And anyone who wants to get close to you now
has to start lying as well.
And I hate you for that.
I know I messed up.
Tommy messed up.
We never made Astor family.
All that I'm saying is--
Bollocks!
STEPHEN: Look, please.
Tommy did his time, OK?
But I paid for it, too.
10 years I've been out of trouble.
And 10 years you won't talk to me properly.
Well, how can I?
I don't give a shit about the law.
It's the lying I can't understand.
I just want it over with, Dad.
So do something about it.
Change your name back.
It's not so boring, being normal.
Look, I hear you had a bit of trouble.
Get out.
Get out!
[phone ringing]
Get out!
Derek! Derek!
Come on, get in.
Derek!
Derek.
[door slamming]
Shit.
OK, listen.
My real name is Derek Dougan Love.
In 1981, I committed a fraud which blew up in my face.
I was wanted by the police.
I still am, I suppose.
A friend who lived abroad offered me his name
and national insurance number--
Stephen Crane-- so I could start again, work where I wanted.
And I lived happily ever after until now.
[sniffling]
Four people know this, right?
Me, Dad, Tommy, and Stephen Crane.
And now you.
It has to stop there.
And it does.
Full stop.
End of story.
Just wanted to say good night.
Are you all right?
Yes, thanks.
Don't stay up too late tonight.
Any more lip from you, I'll have the hounds on you.
Dad, about Colin.
Oh, darling, you know, you don't have to worry about that.
Look, Stephen's got a stake in this place.
And in my experience, he will fight like a cornered mastiff
to protect his bill and bowl.
If anybody undesirable does try to pick up the shares,
well, I'm sure he'll have them either blackmailed or shot.
You like him now, don't you?
Yeah.
Very much.
Night night.
Hey, come on, Victoria.
It's all right.
Victoria.
VICTORIA: [laughing]
Victoria?
Nothing, sorry.
Victoria?
It's just that the worst part of all--
it's Derek.
Derek Dougan!
So what are you doing here, anyway?
Oh, Penny was worried because Colin sold
his shares to Kleber's today.
And now you're going to sell your shares
to bail your father out.
Tommy told me.
They're all I've got.
And so is he, unfortunately.
If there was any other way, I'd be doing it.
That's our little secret, all right?
It's very important, Victoria.
I'll be back tonight, OK?
Derek.
Maybe I'll get used to it.
I never did.
TOMMY: Nice girl, that.
What's she see in you?
Reliability, security, integrity.
Is he all right?
TOMMY: We'll manage.
No, you won't.
Gave him a couple of his tranquilizers.
[heavy breathing]
Good.
At least I'll get a word in edgewise.
Look, if it isn't Stephen Crane.
I suppose you think I've come to make up.
Wrong.
I've come to make you feel worse.
I'm going to pay off your debts.
That-- that's my business.
There is another word for it.
You know your arse?
You think you couldn't stuff the money up there for me,
could you?
Have it your own way.
Goodbye.
All this-- you love it, don't you?
Why couldn't you be normal?
I promise you that one day all this mess will be sorted out.
And Derek Love will emerge from a telephone box in Dudley.
Goodbye, Derek.
Good night, Dad.
[phone ringing]
Tom.
Hello, Stephen.
How are you?
STEPHEN (ON PHONE): Terrible.
Good, good.
I'm afraid I've got 1% of Douglas Motors to sell.
Are you interested?
This is serious?
STEPHEN (ON PHONE): I'm afraid so.
Oh, no, thank you.
STEPHEN (ON PHONE): What?
I don't need any more of Douglas Motors,
but thank you anyway.
Look, please.
I need the money, and I don't want just anybody to have them.
FRANKLYN (ON PHONE): All right.
1%, current market price, closing time tonight.
FRANKLYN (ON PHONE): Agreed?
It's robbery.
Thank you.
Your check's in the post.
STEPHEN (ON PHONE): Love to Jo.
And Jimmy.
Yes.
And no.
We'll meet soon.
Well, well.
It's my lucky day.
That was one of the annoying things about Gavin, you know.
He'd always get round me when we'd had a row.
I'm going to miss it.
About the only part of him I will.
[chuckling]
Well, you needn't miss it for long.
Markus-- that long red thing hanging down his shirt?
That's his tongue.
He's sweet.
Funny friend for Stephen.
Stephen only has funny friends.
Tori.
VICTORIA: Mhm?
You know you said earlier about Stephen?
What?
About him having something to hide?
What is it, and can we use it to stop him from selling out?
He has his reasons.
And I promised him.
So have I. Tori, it's family.
It's us.
And it seems to be falling apart.
You have to tell me.
Does it mean that much to you?
I see.
[sigh]
Penny, look.
You're obviously very tired.
I won't keep you.
Oh, I wish someone would.
I know you need money in a hurry for your father.
But I came to ask you not to sell out.
Victoria told me.
I made her.
It's not the money. It's--
Family.
I know.
Please, Derek.
Are you thinking what I think you're saying?
Sorry.
It's not personal.
It's business, as you would say.
It's blackmail, as I would say.
Would you really short me?
Well, let's hope it's never going to be necessary.
[theme music]