1
00:00:02,088 --> 00:00:03,193
[sighs]

2
00:00:05,166 --> 00:00:06,968
What you doing, Carlton?

3
00:00:06,988 --> 00:00:10,005
Oh, packing away my CDs.
Will and I made a bet.

4
00:00:10,024 --> 00:00:12,046
For one week, I'm not allowed
to listen to Tom Jones

5
00:00:12,066 --> 00:00:17,004
and he's not allowed to listen
to that God-awful Biggie Smalls.

6
00:00:17,024 --> 00:00:20,898
We have $50 riding on it,
and I'm gonna win.

7
00:00:20,918 --> 00:00:22,123
Who's Tom Jones?

8
00:00:23,865 --> 00:00:27,061
Nicky, Nicky.
Tom Jones is the king of swing.

9
00:00:27,082 --> 00:00:29,054
The tower of power. Mr. Vegas.

10
00:00:29,074 --> 00:00:31,862
This guy's a legend.

11
00:00:31,882 --> 00:00:32,967
[sighs]

12
00:00:34,829 --> 00:00:36,831
Can I hear one of his songs?

13
00:00:36,851 --> 00:00:40,037
Oh, I'd love to, but no can do.

14
00:00:40,057 --> 00:00:41,869
Please?

15
00:00:44,966 --> 00:00:48,952
Well, I guess one song
wouldn't hurt.

16
00:00:53,764 --> 00:00:55,960
[instrumental music]

17
00:00:58,943 --> 00:01:04,678
♪ It's not unusual to be loved
by anyone ♪

18
00:01:04,698 --> 00:01:09,748
♪ It's not unusual to have fun
with anyone ♪

19
00:01:09,767 --> 00:01:13,753
♪ But when I see you hanging
about with anyone ♪

20
00:01:14,797 --> 00:01:19,668
♪ It's not unusual
to see me cry ♪

21
00:01:19,689 --> 00:01:22,681
♪ I wanna die ♪

22
00:01:22,701 --> 00:01:27,622
♪ It's not unusual to go out
at any time.. ♪♪

23
00:01:30,672 --> 00:01:33,724
Just couldn't hang on there
could you, little fella?

24
00:01:33,745 --> 00:01:35,584
Darn.

25
00:01:37,562 --> 00:01:39,660
Thank you. Thank you very much.
Thank you.

26
00:01:42,682 --> 00:01:44,521
Here's something for
your trouble, little brother.

27
00:01:44,541 --> 00:01:45,594
Thanks a lot.

28
00:01:47,473 --> 00:01:49,650
Five bucks?
What do I look like?

29
00:01:50,366 --> 00:01:53,449
Come on, man.
You got to break me off
some.

30
00:01:54,459 --> 00:01:56,450
[theme song]

31
00:01:56,470 --> 00:01:57,592
♪ Now this is a story ♪

32
00:01:57,613 --> 00:01:59,635
♪ All about how my life
got flipped ♪

33
00:01:59,654 --> 00:02:01,756
♪ Turned upside-down
and I'd like to take a minute ♪

34
00:02:01,778 --> 00:02:04,699
♪ Just sit right there I'll tell
you how I became the prince ♪

35
00:02:04,719 --> 00:02:06,781
♪ Of a town called Bel-Air ♪

36
00:02:14,886 --> 00:02:17,797
♪ In West Philadelphia
born and raised ♪

37
00:02:17,818 --> 00:02:20,759
♪ On the playground was where
I spent most of my days ♪

38
00:02:20,780 --> 00:02:22,782
♪ Chillin' out maxin'
relaxing all cool ♪

39
00:02:22,802 --> 00:02:24,924
♪ And all shootin' some B-ball
outside of the school ♪

40
00:02:24,945 --> 00:02:27,876
♪ When a couple of guys
who were up to no good ♪

41
00:02:27,895 --> 00:02:29,876
♪ Started makin' trouble
in my neighborhood ♪

42
00:02:29,897 --> 00:02:32,000
♪ I got in one little fight
and my mom got scared ♪

43
00:02:32,020 --> 00:02:33,860
♪ And said you're moving
with your auntie ♪

44
00:02:33,880 --> 00:02:34,911
♪ And uncle in Bel-Air ♪

45
00:02:34,931 --> 00:02:35,932
♪ I whistled for a cab ♪

46
00:02:35,951 --> 00:02:36,982
♪ And when it came near ♪

47
00:02:37,002 --> 00:02:38,124
♪ The license plate said fresh ♪

48
00:02:38,145 --> 00:02:39,934
♪ And it had dice
in the mirror ♪

49
00:02:39,955 --> 00:02:40,965
♪ If anything I can say ♪

50
00:02:40,985 --> 00:02:42,026
♪ That this cab was rare ♪

51
00:02:42,046 --> 00:02:43,097
♪ But I thought nah forget it ♪

52
00:02:43,117 --> 00:02:45,998
♪ Yo homes to Bel-Air ♪

53
00:02:46,019 --> 00:02:49,062
♪ I pulled up to a house
about seven or eight ♪

54
00:02:49,082 --> 00:02:52,043
♪ And I yelled to the cabbie
yo homes smell you later ♪

55
00:02:52,063 --> 00:02:54,125
♪ I looked at my kingdom
I was finally there ♪

56
00:02:54,145 --> 00:02:57,268
♪ To sit on my throne
as the prince of Bel-Air ♪♪

57
00:03:13,300 --> 00:03:16,291
- That movie was pathetic.
- Pathetic.

58
00:03:16,311 --> 00:03:19,361
Naked women bumping and grinding
on strangers' laps?

59
00:03:19,380 --> 00:03:22,411
And-and the way them guys
j-just sat there and took
it.

60
00:03:23,522 --> 00:03:25,402
How can anyone find
that attractive?

61
00:03:25,422 --> 00:03:28,383
I mean, is our culture
that diseased?

62
00:03:28,403 --> 00:03:30,313
You know, just-just
thinking about it

63
00:03:30,332 --> 00:03:32,453
i-is making me feel dirty.

64
00:03:32,473 --> 00:03:34,463
You know, I'm gonna have to
take a shower.

65
00:03:36,275 --> 00:03:37,435
You wanna join me?

66
00:03:39,375 --> 00:03:42,286
What am I saying?
It's even infected me.

67
00:03:44,276 --> 00:03:45,386
-Hola.
- Hi.

68
00:03:45,406 --> 00:03:46,507
What'd you guys end up seeing?

69
00:03:46,527 --> 00:03:49,307
- "Showgirls."
- Again?

70
00:03:50,476 --> 00:03:52,447
What does that make it,
eight times, Will?

71
00:03:52,468 --> 00:03:53,548
[chuckles]

72
00:03:54,267 --> 00:03:55,447
Eight times?

73
00:03:55,468 --> 00:03:56,549
You told me you hated it.

74
00:03:57,268 --> 00:03:58,428
No, baby, I did.

75
00:03:58,448 --> 00:04:02,479
I mean, and every time, I wanted
to just walk out of there.

76
00:04:02,500 --> 00:04:05,280
I know the feeling, Will. Bye.

77
00:04:05,299 --> 00:04:07,530
Wait, bu-bu-but, ba-ba-baby.

78
00:04:07,550 --> 00:04:11,360
Baby, hol.. Oh, girl!

79
00:04:11,381 --> 00:04:14,302
Boy, did you handle that badly.

80
00:04:18,282 --> 00:04:20,372
Oh, good, Geoffrey, you're here.

81
00:04:20,392 --> 00:04:21,382
No.

82
00:04:21,402 --> 00:04:23,433
When did I ever ask you
for anything?

83
00:04:23,453 --> 00:04:26,453
You never stopped asking
from the moment I started here.

84
00:04:26,473 --> 00:04:28,274
That's not true.

85
00:04:28,294 --> 00:04:29,484
In fact, as I remember

86
00:04:29,505 --> 00:04:32,326
I spent my first seven hours
of service here

87
00:04:32,345 --> 00:04:36,335
installing wall-to-wall
carpet
for Barbie's dream house.

88
00:04:36,356 --> 00:04:40,287
Carpet which had to be
promptly removed.

89
00:04:40,307 --> 00:04:41,497
Well, it's not my fault
that when Ken got home

90
00:04:41,517 --> 00:04:43,398
he didn't like it.

91
00:04:45,287 --> 00:04:49,398
And it wasn't my fault the
dollhouse burnt to the
ground.

92
00:04:49,418 --> 00:04:51,538
Geoffrey, Skipper died
in that fire.

93
00:04:51,559 --> 00:04:53,480
[scoffs]
I don't even wanna think
about it.

94
00:04:53,500 --> 00:04:56,450
Look, I need you to
hem this dress.

95
00:04:56,469 --> 00:04:57,500
Come on.

96
00:04:57,521 --> 00:04:59,331
- Hi, daddy.
- Hi, baby.

97
00:04:59,350 --> 00:05:01,340
Carlton, have you seen the notes
I've been working on

98
00:05:01,360 --> 00:05:02,451
for my speech before
the bar tomorrow?

99
00:05:02,471 --> 00:05:04,281
Yeah, they're right here,
big guy.

100
00:05:04,301 --> 00:05:05,451
I've crossed out
what didn't work

101
00:05:05,471 --> 00:05:07,492
and rewritten the rest.

102
00:05:07,513 --> 00:05:10,303
How thoughtful.

103
00:05:10,323 --> 00:05:11,453
Daddy, can I use your car
tonight?

104
00:05:11,472 --> 00:05:13,433
- No.
- How about mom's?

105
00:05:13,454 --> 00:05:15,454
Talk to her.

106
00:05:15,473 --> 00:05:19,304
Mom, dad said it's okay
for me to use your car tonight.

107
00:05:19,325 --> 00:05:20,495
I didn't say that.

108
00:05:20,515 --> 00:05:22,546
Those weren't your exact words,
Uncle Phil

109
00:05:22,566 --> 00:05:25,546
but you kind of did imply that..

110
00:05:25,566 --> 00:05:28,357
You know, there was absolutely
no reason

111
00:05:28,377 --> 00:05:29,507
for me to jump in here,
was there?

112
00:05:29,527 --> 00:05:31,497
None whatsoever.

113
00:05:31,517 --> 00:05:33,288
I'm gonna go ahead
and jump out of here.

114
00:05:33,307 --> 00:05:35,297
Yes, jump on with your bad self.

115
00:05:35,318 --> 00:05:36,448
It's fine if you take the
car,
honey.

116
00:05:36,467 --> 00:05:38,368
Oh, thank you.

117
00:05:38,389 --> 00:05:39,529
Ashley's going out tonight.

118
00:05:39,548 --> 00:05:41,378
I've given Geoffrey
the night off

119
00:05:41,399 --> 00:05:43,360
and Nicky's going to
his first sleepover.

120
00:05:43,380 --> 00:05:45,310
Mm-hmm.

121
00:05:45,330 --> 00:05:46,570
Philip, the house will be
nice
and quiet.

122
00:05:47,289 --> 00:05:49,470
- Mm.
- You know what that means?

123
00:05:49,490 --> 00:05:52,420
Yeah, I can finally finish
my speech.

124
00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:54,441
- Philip!
- What?

125
00:05:55,541 --> 00:05:58,482
- What?
- Nobody said anything.

126
00:06:00,393 --> 00:06:02,573
Nicky's first sleepover. Ahh.

127
00:06:03,293 --> 00:06:05,353
I'll never forget my first
overnighter.

128
00:06:05,373 --> 00:06:06,413
Ned Martin's house.

129
00:06:06,433 --> 00:06:09,484
Raised all kinds of heck.

130
00:06:09,505 --> 00:06:12,285
Drank hot chocolate.
Had pillow fights.

131
00:06:12,304 --> 00:06:14,345
Watched the O.J. Trial.

132
00:06:15,466 --> 00:06:17,577
What a night.

133
00:06:18,296 --> 00:06:20,577
[instrumental music]

134
00:06:21,297 --> 00:06:22,328
[knocking]

135
00:06:22,349 --> 00:06:24,549
- Hi, Carlton.
- Hi, Michelle.

136
00:06:24,568 --> 00:06:28,470
Here, I have a special
delivery letter for you.

137
00:06:28,490 --> 00:06:30,471
Odd. No return address.

138
00:06:32,321 --> 00:06:34,542
"A special invitation from me
to you for tonight.

139
00:06:34,562 --> 00:06:37,543
Please RSVP ASAP."

140
00:06:37,563 --> 00:06:40,404
Darn, another chain letter.

141
00:06:40,424 --> 00:06:43,435
Carlton, it's from me.

142
00:06:43,455 --> 00:06:46,417
Sweet cheeks of Buddha,
you pack a wallop.

143
00:06:48,437 --> 00:06:50,458
So you wanna go out tonight?

144
00:06:50,479 --> 00:06:52,340
Oh.

145
00:06:52,360 --> 00:06:53,560
No can do.
I have to study tonight.

146
00:06:53,579 --> 00:06:55,450
On Saturday night?

147
00:06:55,471 --> 00:06:59,312
For some, it's bath night.
For me, it's math night.

148
00:06:59,331 --> 00:07:00,452
But, hey,
maybe you could help me?

149
00:07:00,473 --> 00:07:05,305
Oh. Well, I-I'd probably
just
get in your way.

150
00:07:05,324 --> 00:07:06,574
Yeah, you're probably right.

151
00:07:08,325 --> 00:07:10,576
Well, bye.

152
00:07:10,597 --> 00:07:12,417
Bye.

153
00:07:14,567 --> 00:07:18,379
Hmm. She seems a bit of
a gloomy Gus.

154
00:07:22,531 --> 00:07:24,522
I can't believe Michelle
hasn't called.

155
00:07:24,542 --> 00:07:27,543
I've left messages.
I've paged her.

156
00:07:27,563 --> 00:07:30,594
Oh, God, I hope
she's not disgruntled.

157
00:07:32,435 --> 00:07:34,436
You better be worrying about me
being disgruntled

158
00:07:34,455 --> 00:07:37,436
after the way you messed
my date up today.

159
00:07:37,456 --> 00:07:40,477
Will, I've come
to the realization

160
00:07:40,498 --> 00:07:42,379
I don't understand women.

161
00:07:42,398 --> 00:07:44,388
Or men, for that matter.

162
00:07:44,409 --> 00:07:47,400
Maybe I should just talk to
my dad. He understands women.

163
00:07:47,420 --> 00:07:49,461
I'm sorry about before.

164
00:07:49,480 --> 00:07:51,511
We're gonna have a great time
tonight, sweetheart.

165
00:07:51,531 --> 00:07:53,502
A great time.

166
00:07:53,522 --> 00:07:55,472
You know what I'm saying?

167
00:07:57,324 --> 00:07:58,615
I love you. Mm.

168
00:08:00,474 --> 00:08:02,335
Do you?

169
00:08:02,355 --> 00:08:04,516
Sweetheart, I just said I did.

170
00:08:04,536 --> 00:08:07,447
And you look beautiful.

171
00:08:07,467 --> 00:08:10,358
- Philip.
- Ah, I'm serious.

172
00:08:10,379 --> 00:08:13,380
For someone who's had four
children, you look amazing.

173
00:08:14,491 --> 00:08:17,392
[instrumental music]

174
00:08:17,411 --> 00:08:21,392
Sandra, I'm telling you.
I-I really hated that movie.

175
00:08:21,412 --> 00:08:24,373
I don't know. I-I guess
in some sick kind of way

176
00:08:24,394 --> 00:08:26,485
I was just trying to
punish myself.

177
00:08:28,345 --> 00:08:31,336
No, no, no. You're right.
No, I can be serious.

178
00:08:31,356 --> 00:08:33,337
Ju.. Let me prove it to you.

179
00:08:33,357 --> 00:08:36,408
Sandra, I seriously wanna go out
with you tonight.

180
00:08:37,549 --> 00:08:39,460
Your cousin?

181
00:08:39,479 --> 00:08:41,460
Oh, no, no, no.
I mean, I can find somebody

182
00:08:41,480 --> 00:08:43,410
to go out with your cousin,
yeah.

183
00:08:45,381 --> 00:08:46,482
Oh, no, no.
That's no problem at all.

184
00:08:46,502 --> 00:08:49,443
Hey, and I got the perfect guy
for the job.

185
00:08:50,483 --> 00:08:52,574
Alright, baby,
you're the breast..

186
00:08:52,595 --> 00:08:55,356
Best! Best! I said best!

187
00:09:01,517 --> 00:09:03,348
No.

188
00:09:03,368 --> 00:09:05,359
Hey, hey, Carlton.
Come on, man. You owe me.

189
00:09:05,379 --> 00:09:07,499
You almost wrecked
everything
with Sandra.

190
00:09:07,519 --> 00:09:09,400
I'm not gonna do it.

191
00:09:09,421 --> 00:09:11,612
Oh, you're not gonna do it.

192
00:09:11,631 --> 00:09:13,512
You know what? That's fine.

193
00:09:13,532 --> 00:09:16,413
It's probably time for me
to move on anyway, you know.

194
00:09:16,434 --> 00:09:18,405
And as luck would have it,
it's come to my attention

195
00:09:18,425 --> 00:09:21,596
that there's this cute little
mail carrier that's available.

196
00:09:21,615 --> 00:09:23,625
- You wouldn't.
- Yeah, you're right.

197
00:09:23,645 --> 00:09:26,617
But that would be exactly
what you deserved.

198
00:09:26,637 --> 00:09:29,398
Will, I'm sorry
and I know I owe you one.

199
00:09:29,418 --> 00:09:31,398
But I just wouldn't
feel right going out

200
00:09:31,418 --> 00:09:33,589
and having a good time
without Michelle.

201
00:09:35,451 --> 00:09:37,482
What if I could promise you
a terrible time?

202
00:09:38,572 --> 00:09:40,553
If I could only be sure.

203
00:09:42,484 --> 00:09:44,484
I guarantee you the worst
time

204
00:09:44,503 --> 00:09:47,424
that you have ever had
in your life.

205
00:09:47,445 --> 00:09:48,486
Okay.

206
00:09:48,505 --> 00:09:50,466
[instrumental music]

207
00:10:04,651 --> 00:10:07,552
[instrumental music on stereo]

208
00:10:24,449 --> 00:10:26,480
[both chuckle]

209
00:10:26,500 --> 00:10:29,550
We finally have the house
all to ourselves.

210
00:10:32,500 --> 00:10:34,390
Hi.

211
00:10:34,409 --> 00:10:36,539
Don't stop. Go on with whatever
you're doing.

212
00:10:36,559 --> 00:10:40,468
Wait. Oh, my God.
Ew. What were you doing?

213
00:10:40,489 --> 00:10:42,559
I don't even wanna think
about it. Where's Geoffrey?

214
00:10:42,579 --> 00:10:45,459
- He's got the night off.
- What about my dress?

215
00:10:45,479 --> 00:10:48,419
I'm pretty sure
he was wearing pants.

216
00:10:51,479 --> 00:10:52,639
Eww.

217
00:10:52,658 --> 00:10:54,638
[instrumental music]

218
00:10:58,558 --> 00:11:01,517
Oh, let me tell you now,
that there was some good grub.

219
00:11:01,537 --> 00:11:03,507
That girl can cook. Mm!

220
00:11:03,527 --> 00:11:07,507
What about you, Carlton?
Did you enjoy your dinner?

221
00:11:07,527 --> 00:11:08,627
It was fine.

222
00:11:09,657 --> 00:11:11,607
You don't talk much, do you?

223
00:11:11,628 --> 00:11:15,398
Uh, as a child,
he was dropped on his tongue.

224
00:11:16,547 --> 00:11:20,567
I think he's the strong
silent type.

225
00:11:20,588 --> 00:11:24,417
Ooh. You are strong.

226
00:11:24,436 --> 00:11:27,376
Well, I'm no stranger
to the gym.

227
00:11:28,597 --> 00:11:32,417
Carlton, how about some dessert?
I've got ice cream.

228
00:11:32,436 --> 00:11:35,596
Sweet chocolate ice cream.

229
00:11:37,526 --> 00:11:40,416
I'm a tutti-frutti man myself.

230
00:11:44,406 --> 00:11:45,666
(Will)
What the heck is wrong with you,
Carlton?

231
00:11:46,385 --> 00:11:48,495
That girl just offered you
two scoops.

232
00:11:49,626 --> 00:11:51,616
I'm afraid I'm a one-gal guy.

233
00:11:51,635 --> 00:11:54,525
[laughing]

234
00:11:54,545 --> 00:11:55,655
What's so funny?

235
00:11:56,376 --> 00:11:58,386
We were just thinking
of a little game we could play.

236
00:11:58,405 --> 00:12:00,455
- Tiffany.
- Oh, come on, Sandra.

237
00:12:00,476 --> 00:12:01,576
- It'll be fun.
- Wait.

238
00:12:01,596 --> 00:12:04,506
- What'll be fun?
- A word game.

239
00:12:04,525 --> 00:12:08,525
Oh, that ain't exactly the kind
of a game I was thinking about.

240
00:12:09,605 --> 00:12:12,485
It involves the word "strip."

241
00:12:12,504 --> 00:12:13,664
Set it up.

242
00:12:14,384 --> 00:12:15,624
[instrumental music]

243
00:12:19,445 --> 00:12:21,435
Tell me this, Doogie. Um..

244
00:12:22,634 --> 00:12:25,484
How is it possible
that we're losing?

245
00:12:25,504 --> 00:12:28,584
I can't pull a vowel
to save my life.

246
00:12:28,605 --> 00:12:32,644
As soon as you get warm,
I wanna see some skin again.

247
00:12:32,663 --> 00:12:35,413
You're little on the
demanding
side, ain't you, girl?

248
00:12:35,433 --> 00:12:36,593
Hey, just play them
or lose them.

249
00:12:36,614 --> 00:12:38,484
Hey. Hey.

250
00:12:38,503 --> 00:12:40,503
This thing is not over yet.

251
00:12:44,584 --> 00:12:46,424
Ah! Four. Alright. Alright.

252
00:12:46,444 --> 00:12:47,544
A four-letter word,
four-letter word.

253
00:12:47,564 --> 00:12:50,474
Uh, uh..

254
00:12:50,494 --> 00:12:52,644
Eenie, meenie, minie, mo

255
00:12:52,663 --> 00:12:56,552
now some of y'all's clothes
gots to go.

256
00:12:56,573 --> 00:12:58,493
[knocking]

257
00:12:58,512 --> 00:12:59,642
(Mad Dog)
'Tiffany?'

258
00:12:59,662 --> 00:13:01,522
Hey, w-who's that?

259
00:13:01,542 --> 00:13:02,552
Her boyfriend.

260
00:13:02,573 --> 00:13:05,373
What? You got a boyfriend?

261
00:13:05,392 --> 00:13:06,612
Of course.

262
00:13:06,632 --> 00:13:08,602
[knocking on door]

263
00:13:08,623 --> 00:13:10,573
One second, Mad Dog.

264
00:13:12,502 --> 00:13:13,482
- Mad Dog?
- Mad Dog?

265
00:13:13,502 --> 00:13:15,422
[instrumental music]

266
00:13:18,462 --> 00:13:19,492
- Mad Dog.
- Mad Dog.

267
00:13:19,511 --> 00:13:20,591
Quick, in here.

268
00:13:20,612 --> 00:13:22,392
Don't pull on me, girl.

269
00:13:22,411 --> 00:13:23,541
Hey, would you..
Hey, hey, hey.

270
00:13:23,562 --> 00:13:26,442
Alright. Don't be push,
don't be push..

271
00:13:26,462 --> 00:13:27,562
This is just great.

272
00:13:27,582 --> 00:13:29,592
I can't believe I let you
talk me into this.

273
00:13:29,612 --> 00:13:31,502
I hate you.

274
00:13:31,521 --> 00:13:33,391
Shh!

275
00:13:33,411 --> 00:13:34,661
The dude is out there.
He's gonna hear us.

276
00:13:35,381 --> 00:13:37,611
Hear us? He's gonna kill us.

277
00:13:37,631 --> 00:13:41,410
That is if your breath
don't kill us first.

278
00:13:41,430 --> 00:13:44,560
Damn, man. Don't you bring
a mint when you go on a date?

279
00:13:44,581 --> 00:13:47,461
As a matter of fact, I do.
They're in my pants pocket.

280
00:13:47,481 --> 00:13:49,591
You wanna go get them for
me?

281
00:13:49,611 --> 00:13:51,481
Oh, this is ridiculous.

282
00:13:51,500 --> 00:13:54,612
Mad Dog. I'm sure he's
nothing
but a pussy cat.

283
00:13:58,434 --> 00:13:59,574
[muffled scream]

284
00:14:02,636 --> 00:14:04,647
He's gonna eat me.

285
00:14:06,569 --> 00:14:09,400
And then he gonna floss with me.

286
00:14:13,641 --> 00:14:15,572
(Tiffany)
'I'm tired of your excuses.'

287
00:14:15,593 --> 00:14:16,674
(Mad Dog)
But it's not an excuse.

288
00:14:17,393 --> 00:14:18,654
Just give me a minute
to explain

289
00:14:18,674 --> 00:14:20,585
and then I'm out of here.

290
00:14:23,536 --> 00:14:25,667
Alright. You know,
t-that's cool. You know.

291
00:14:26,389 --> 00:14:27,609
As soon as the blackness monster
explains

292
00:14:27,629 --> 00:14:29,480
we'll be home free.

293
00:14:29,500 --> 00:14:31,421
[instrumental music]

294
00:14:39,615 --> 00:14:41,496
[both yelping]

295
00:14:43,416 --> 00:14:44,687
Shh!

296
00:14:45,407 --> 00:14:46,598
He's sleeping. Come on,
you gotta get out of here.

297
00:14:46,619 --> 00:14:49,460
- Come on!
- Oh, alright.

298
00:14:53,551 --> 00:14:56,403
I got this strange feeling
we forgetting something.

299
00:14:56,423 --> 00:15:00,545
You're right. Thank you
for a very lovely evening.

300
00:15:00,565 --> 00:15:01,686
Hey, hey, what y'all do
with our clothes?

301
00:15:02,416 --> 00:15:04,647
It's under him.

302
00:15:04,667 --> 00:15:07,519
Why you put, why you put
our clothes..

303
00:15:07,539 --> 00:15:09,490
Bel-Air's not that long
of a walk.

304
00:15:10,670 --> 00:15:13,482
Alright, look. We just gonna get
our clothes, then we gonna go.

305
00:15:13,503 --> 00:15:14,623
No, no, no.
From the looks of this brother

306
00:15:14,643 --> 00:15:15,704
he's a heavy sleeper.

307
00:15:16,423 --> 00:15:17,634
We alright. We alright.
Go ahead. Go ahead.

308
00:15:19,646 --> 00:15:21,587
[whispering]
Just under. Under..

309
00:15:24,518 --> 00:15:26,499
[groaning]

310
00:15:41,706 --> 00:15:44,457
[groaning]

311
00:15:50,621 --> 00:15:53,483
Go on without me.
Save yourself.

312
00:15:56,534 --> 00:15:57,685
[grunting]

313
00:16:02,527 --> 00:16:04,649
Will, forget the clothes.
Let's just get out of here.

314
00:16:04,669 --> 00:16:07,460
Let's go.

315
00:16:07,479 --> 00:16:08,680
Who the hell are you?

316
00:16:10,512 --> 00:16:11,632
Um..

317
00:16:18,446 --> 00:16:21,507
This is just a dream.

318
00:16:26,650 --> 00:16:30,552
We're not really here.

319
00:16:31,692 --> 00:16:33,593
Stop that.

320
00:16:38,605 --> 00:16:41,506
Carlton, stop.

321
00:16:41,527 --> 00:16:43,698
I said, who the hell are you?

322
00:16:43,717 --> 00:16:45,738
Um..

323
00:16:46,460 --> 00:16:48,651
Surprise!

324
00:16:48,671 --> 00:16:52,533
Hey, man. We from L.A.
stripper gram. Yeah, you know.

325
00:16:52,553 --> 00:16:55,604
We got a special birthday wish
for you fr-from Tiffany.

326
00:16:55,623 --> 00:16:57,644
Yeah, you know.

327
00:16:57,665 --> 00:17:00,607
♪ Happy birthday to ♪

328
00:17:00,626 --> 00:17:02,547
♪ Mad Dog ♪

329
00:17:02,568 --> 00:17:07,500
♪ Happy birthday Mad Dog ♪

330
00:17:07,519 --> 00:17:09,711
It's not my birthday.

331
00:17:09,731 --> 00:17:12,572
[stammering]

332
00:17:12,592 --> 00:17:13,693
Uh..

333
00:17:13,714 --> 00:17:16,665
♪ Macho macho man ♪

334
00:17:16,685 --> 00:17:19,627
♪ I've got to be a macho man ♪

335
00:17:19,647 --> 00:17:22,478
♪ Young man
there's a place you can go ♪

336
00:17:22,497 --> 00:17:25,539
♪ I said young man
you're all out on your own ♪

337
00:17:25,559 --> 00:17:28,740
♪ I said Y-M-C-A ♪

338
00:17:28,760 --> 00:17:30,771
♪ Y-M-C-A ♪♪

339
00:17:31,492 --> 00:17:32,592
Stop it.

340
00:17:32,613 --> 00:17:34,634
Stop it.

341
00:17:34,654 --> 00:17:38,766
You know what? Somebody in here
is trying to play me for a fool.

342
00:17:39,487 --> 00:17:40,687
No, no, Mad Dog.
None of that, man.

343
00:17:40,707 --> 00:17:42,618
No, you.. You know..

344
00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:48,730
Someone's gonna die.

345
00:17:48,750 --> 00:17:50,721
[shrieks]

346
00:17:50,742 --> 00:17:52,663
Now, wait a minute.
Now, hold on.

347
00:17:52,683 --> 00:17:55,525
Hold up. Hold up. Hold up.
Now, wait a minute.

348
00:17:57,736 --> 00:18:00,727
This black-on-black crime
makes me sick!

349
00:18:04,608 --> 00:18:06,649
Now, if this is what
we gotta do

350
00:18:06,670 --> 00:18:09,642
just give me a damn minute
with my cousin.

351
00:18:13,763 --> 00:18:15,584
Um..

352
00:18:16,736 --> 00:18:19,607
We're about to die.

353
00:18:19,626 --> 00:18:25,589
Alright, but the best defense
is a strong offense, okay?

354
00:18:25,609 --> 00:18:27,600
So remember me for this.

355
00:18:28,762 --> 00:18:30,753
I'll see you on the other side.

356
00:18:34,804 --> 00:18:36,605
Ah!

357
00:18:38,697 --> 00:18:39,777
Sorry.

358
00:18:41,688 --> 00:18:43,639
[grunting]

359
00:18:43,659 --> 00:18:45,740
Oh, my God. I just saw
the state of Florida

360
00:18:45,760 --> 00:18:47,551
just pass over my head.

361
00:18:47,570 --> 00:18:50,522
Hey, hey.
Hey, Mad Dog. Mad Dog.

362
00:18:50,542 --> 00:18:51,752
Bro, bro, you know..
Come on, man.

363
00:18:51,773 --> 00:18:53,544
Shouldn't you be climbing up

364
00:18:53,563 --> 00:18:54,694
the Empire State Building
or something?

365
00:18:54,715 --> 00:18:57,716
- Will, the window.
- Go, go.

366
00:18:57,736 --> 00:18:59,647
[yelping]

367
00:18:59,667 --> 00:19:00,778
[grunting]

368
00:19:00,797 --> 00:19:02,778
[screaming]

369
00:19:10,642 --> 00:19:12,703
[laughing]

370
00:19:12,724 --> 00:19:13,795
Bet you wish you wouldn't
have gone off

371
00:19:13,814 --> 00:19:16,645
that SlimFast now, don't you?

372
00:19:16,666 --> 00:19:18,545
You're lucky.

373
00:19:18,564 --> 00:19:21,573
But eventually, you're gonna
have to come back in here.

374
00:19:21,593 --> 00:19:23,623
Eh, shut up
and get back in there

375
00:19:23,643 --> 00:19:25,622
you're stretching the building.

376
00:19:27,581 --> 00:19:31,600
Will...what, what are
we gonna do now?

377
00:19:32,630 --> 00:19:35,629
Oh. Well, you know,
it's almost winter.

378
00:19:35,649 --> 00:19:37,698
Eventually, he's gonna have
to hibernate.

379
00:19:37,719 --> 00:19:39,599
All we got to do,
you know, just hang out up here

380
00:19:39,617 --> 00:19:40,817
don't bring no attention
to ourselves.

381
00:19:41,537 --> 00:19:43,816
(male #1)
'Hey, look, those guys
are gonna jump.'

382
00:19:44,536 --> 00:19:48,525
Uh, no, no, man. W-we're just
out getting some air, man.

383
00:19:51,685 --> 00:19:54,604
[siren wailing]

384
00:19:54,623 --> 00:19:57,532
This is the worst night
of my life.

385
00:19:58,672 --> 00:20:00,592
Ain't that what I promised you?

386
00:20:01,790 --> 00:20:07,618
Don't panic. I'm from the Crisis
Intervention Unit.

387
00:20:07,638 --> 00:20:09,528
You're young.

388
00:20:11,577 --> 00:20:12,717
You're young.

389
00:20:16,775 --> 00:20:20,584
"And-and you have everything
to live for."

390
00:20:21,784 --> 00:20:23,643
Just get us down.

391
00:20:23,664 --> 00:20:26,713
There you go, putting the
cart
before the horse.

392
00:20:28,732 --> 00:20:30,712
Now, hand me the baby.

393
00:20:32,671 --> 00:20:35,690
Man, what are you doing?
We ain't got no baby, man.

394
00:20:35,710 --> 00:20:37,749
Oh, my bad.

395
00:20:39,689 --> 00:20:41,708
Man, look, will you get the hell
out of our way, fool?

396
00:20:41,728 --> 00:20:44,647
Hey, there's no need to be
calling names.

397
00:20:44,667 --> 00:20:46,737
Sticks and stones will break
your bones

398
00:20:46,757 --> 00:20:49,596
but a 50-foot fall
will kill y'all.

399
00:20:50,794 --> 00:20:52,744
I made that up myself.

400
00:20:54,724 --> 00:20:59,602
That civil service exam
is really easy, isn't it?

401
00:20:59,621 --> 00:21:00,791
[instrumental music]

402
00:21:03,681 --> 00:21:05,620
But I have to admit
there are times

403
00:21:05,640 --> 00:21:07,710
that I just don't
understand women.

404
00:21:07,730 --> 00:21:11,618
And it doesn't get any easier
when you get older.

405
00:21:11,638 --> 00:21:14,517
No, no. This is the one
right here. Check this out.

406
00:21:14,536 --> 00:21:18,505
"I shouldn't have to tell you.
I mean, you should just know."

407
00:21:18,525 --> 00:21:19,575
How am I supposed to know?

408
00:21:19,595 --> 00:21:21,554
Who do I look like,
Dionne Warwick?

409
00:21:21,574 --> 00:21:22,704
No, no, no.
This is my favorite.

410
00:21:22,725 --> 00:21:25,494
"If you love me as much as you
say you do

411
00:21:25,513 --> 00:21:26,752
you'd know what I'm feeling."

412
00:21:26,772 --> 00:21:29,642
Oh, man. How am I supposed
to know what you're feeling?

413
00:21:29,663 --> 00:21:31,542
What does that mean?

414
00:21:31,561 --> 00:21:33,660
What are you guys talking about
that's so funny?

415
00:21:33,681 --> 00:21:34,771
Oh, sports.

416
00:21:35,491 --> 00:21:37,490
- Football.
- Sports.

417
00:21:37,509 --> 00:21:38,659
Funny. I'm off to
the hairdresser

418
00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:40,759
to talk sports myself.

419
00:21:43,747 --> 00:21:46,496
Hey, no, this is the one
right here. This is the one.

420
00:21:46,516 --> 00:21:48,775
"If you was listening to me,
what'd I just say?"

421
00:21:49,495 --> 00:21:52,554
- They always say that.
- I wasn't listening, you know?

422
00:21:52,574 --> 00:21:53,724
Yo, yo, yo, how about this one?

423
00:21:53,744 --> 00:21:55,703
"Slow down,
you're moving too fast.

424
00:21:55,724 --> 00:21:57,603
We hardly even know each other."

425
00:21:58,733 --> 00:22:01,572
And then she has the nerve
to get upset.

426
00:22:04,701 --> 00:22:06,710
[instrumental music]

427
00:22:11,709 --> 00:22:12,768
[theme music]

428
00:22:14,577 --> 00:22:15,756
♪ Yeah ♪

429
00:22:19,495 --> 00:22:20,715
♪ Yeah ♪

430
00:22:23,705 --> 00:22:25,574
♪ Yeah ♪

431
00:22:28,582 --> 00:22:29,762
♪ Yeah ♪

432
00:22:32,731 --> 00:22:34,690
♪ Yeah ♪

433
00:22:37,579 --> 00:22:39,539
♪ Yeah ♪