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OPEN IT UP, BOB.
GOT IT.
GOOD NIGHT. GOOD NIGHT, GUYS.
LATER.
COME ON, BUDDY.
LET'S GO.
COME ON, MOVE IT!
NEW ORDERS.
THAT'S IT! LET'S GO!
UNH! UHH!
YOUR MOVE.
YOU DON'T LIKE THE ODDS?
GO FOR IT.
SCARED YA.
LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!
ALL RIGHT! LET'S GO!
ALL RIGHT!
GIVE ME SOME BEER HERE.
WHOO!
JOB WELL DONE.
WE'RE GOING TO BE RICH.
CAN YOU DEAL WITH IT?
HIT THE SIREN.
WE GOT COPS!
OH, SHIT.
OHH! FRANK!
GET OUT!
♪ FOR HE'S A JOLLY GOOD FELLOW ♪
♪ WHICH NOBODY CAN DENY ♪
YAY! WHOO!
HAPPY RETIREMENT, BURTY!
IT'S ABOUT TIME.
I THOUGHT YOU'D FORGOTTEN THE OLD BOY.
NO
ACTUALLY, WE DID GET YOU A LITTLE SOMETHING.
AW, YOU SHOULDN'T--
I GUESS YOU SHOULD HAVE.
OHH!
SHUCKS.
THE GUY WE GOT THEM OFF
HARDLY STRUGGLED AT ALL.
JUST MY SIZE, TOO.
FRESH FROM THE MORGUE THIS MORNING.
LET ME GIVE YOU A KISS, PAL.
BOYS AND GIRLS...
CONTRARY TO POPULAR BELIEF,
WE'RE NOT HERE TO SUBSIDIZE THE DOUGHNUT HOUSE.
LET'S GO BACK TO WORK, SHALL WE?
RIGHT. RIGHT.
NO SOUL, BASTARD.
YEAH, HE HAS NO HEART.
THANKS, GUYS. THANKS.
I THINK.
YES! YES! 909! OFFICERS IN PURSUIT!
COME ON! COME ON!
I SHOULDN'T HAVE EATEN THAT DOUGHNUT.
IT'S YOUR RETIREMENT, BURT.
LIVE A LITTLE.
NO DIETARY FIBER IN A DOUGHNUT AT ALL.
2 VESTS?
WHAT ARE YOU WORRIED ABOUT, CHAFING?
DAMN RIGHT, 2 VESTS.
YOU KNOW WHAT THEY GOT NOW?
MAGNESIUM-TIPPED BULLETS.
ARMOR-PIERCING BULLETS,
EXCEPT THEY DON'T JUST PENETRATE.
THEY PENETRATE, AND THEY EXPLODE.
WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE? IF IT HAPPENS, IT HAPPENS.
NOT THIS WEEK, PAL.
CHIP?
REMEMBER PHIL DEEGAN?
WHO?
HOMICIDE OVER IN ROXBURY.
SHORT TIME, SAME AS YOU.
5 DAYS LEFT ON THE FORCE.
FIGURES HE'LL STAY OUT OF THE WAY.
FURNACE IN HIS HOUSE EXPLODES,
KNOCKS HIM CLEAN
INTO HIS NEIGHBOR'S GARAGE.
THEY HAD TO PEEL HIM OFF A CAR.
YEAH, WELL, I DON'T HAVE A GARAGE, PAL.
YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT HOT TUBS.
THAT'S WHY I'M GOING INTO BUSINESS WITH LEWIS.
THAT GUY IN THERE? YEAH.
HE LOOKS LIKE HE ROBS GROCERY STORES.
NOT ANYMORE.
NOT ANYMORE?
I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE EVEN CONSIDERING THIS.
DID YOU SEE THE WOMEN IN THERE?
THEY WERE SO BUOYANT.
WE'RE TALKING ABOUT YOUR LIFE SAVINGS, MAN.
YOU GOT TO PLAN THIS KIND OF THING.
NOT AGAIN.
IF YOU'D LISTEN TO ME FOR ONCE...
SIMPLE RULES OF FINANCE
CAN MAKE A VERY BIG DIFFERENCE.
YOU GOT $11,400, RIGHT?
RIGHT.
YOU PUT THAT IN 6-MONTH CDs.
THAT'S COMPOUNDING AT ABOUT 9 1/4% ANNUALLY,
ONLY IT'S MORE LIKE 14% 'CAUSE IT'S SHIELDED.
YOU AMORTIZE THAT OVER 32 YEARS,
YOU GOT ABOUT...
$500,000.
I KNOW, BURT, BUT WHAT AM I GONNA DO
WITH 1/2 MILLION BUCKS WHEN I'M 92 YEARS OLD?
HOW ABOUT YOU RETIRE?
FORGET IT.
I'M GOING INTO HOT TUBS WITH LEWIS.
RIGHT.
YOU JUST NEVER LISTEN TO ME, DO YOU?
BECAUSE YOU NEVER TALK TO ME, YOU LECTURE ME.
I DON'T LECTURE YOU.
HOW MANY TIMES I TELL YOU NOT TO SMOKE IN THE CAR!
THERE YOU GO AGAIN, YOU'RE LECTURING ME.
WHY DO THEY GIVE US THESE?
THEY NEVER LOOK LIKE THE REAL GUY.
SOMETIMES THEY DO.
NEVER. "DARK HAIR, BROAD NOSE."
IT'S ALWAYS THE SAME FACE.
THEY WOULDN'T DO IT IF IT DIDN'T WORK, BURT.
YOU WANT TO NAME ME ONE TIME SOMEBODY NAILED A SUSPECT
FROM ONE OF THESE COMPOSITES.
HELL, THAT GUY OVER THERE,
HE LOOKS ABOUT AS MUCH LIKE THE SKETCH AS...
SHIT.
OFFICERS NEED ASSISTANCE AT...1300 CHESTNUT.
COME ON, BURT. HE'S GETTING AWAY!
BUT WHERE'S MY VEST?
HALT! POLICE!
THIS IS NOT A GOOD IDEA!
ALL RIGHT, ASSHOLE!
WHAT ABOUT OUR BACKUP, ERNIE?
THIS GUY KILLED 2 COPS!
WATCH YOUR SHOES, BURT.
WATCH IT!
CAN YOU SPARE SOME CHANGE?
SHH, SHH, SHH.
I BET HE LIVES HERE.
THANKS, SHERLOCK.
WAIT A MINUTE, ERNIE, THE BACKUP.
WHAT?
THE BACKUP. JUST WAIT A WHILE.
THERE WILL BE LOTS MORE OF US
AND JUST ONE OF HIM.
WILL YOU SHUT UP AND JUST FOLLOW ME.
ARGH!
CAN'T YOU SHOW A LITTLE PATIENCE
FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE?
ANY OTHER TIME, I'M UP FOR THIS.
I LOVE THIS KIND OF STUFF, YOU KNOW THAT.
YEAH.
LOOK.
READY?
I'M TRYING TO MAKE A POINT HERE.
YOU'RE NOT GIVING ME A FAIR SHAKE.
I'LL TAKE LOW, YOU TAKE HIGH.
I HATE YOU FOR THIS, MAN.
READY, TIGER?
THEY'RE HERE.
SHIT!
ERNIE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
NOBODY SHOOTS AT ME AND GETS AWAY WITH IT!
IT'S RUDE!
OWW!
JESUS, ERNIE!
SHIT.
WHOA!
OW!
YOU OK, BURT?
I DON'T BELIEVE THIS.
UP THE FIRE ESCAPE!
THERE HE GOES! COME ON!
DAMN IT.
UNH!
AAAAH!
GOOD CHOICE.
ERNIE! ERNIE!
ERNIE! NO!
YOU'RE NOT JUMPING OFF THIS BUILDING.
LET GO OF MY THROAT.
I'M NOT GONNA DO IT, ERNIE.
I WAITED 30 YEARS FOR THIS.
I'M NOT THROWING MYSELF OFF
ANY 25-STORY BUILDING.
OK. WE'LL WALK DOWN ONE FLOOR.
YOU MAY NOT CARE ABOUT THE FUTURE, BUT I DO.
AAH!
I'VE GOT MYSELF A LITTLE PLAN HERE.
I'M NOT BREAKING MY NECK
FOR ANY LOW-LIFE SCUM.
DOES ANYONE KNOW WHY SIMPSON AND DILLS
REFUSED TO CHASE A DANGEROUS FELON YESTERDAY?
CAN ANYONE TELL ME WHY THEY DECIDED
TO SIT DOWN ON A ROOF
WHILE THE REST OF THE PRECINCT CHASED HIM
THROUGH THE STREETS OF DOWNTOWN SEATTLE?
COULD IT BE...
BECAUSE DETECTIVE SIMPSON ONLY HAS 6 MORE DAYS
TO SERVE ON THE FORCE?
8.
OH, I'M SORRY, BURT.
YOU'RE REALLY IN FOR THE LONG HAUL.
YOU'RE GOING FOR THAT GOLD WATCH.
WE CHASED HIM TO THE ROOF.
WHERE YOU MANAGED SINGLE-HANDEDLY
TO SUBDUE YOUR PARTNER
UNTIL BACKUP UNITS COULD ARRIVE.
I'M SURE WE'LL ALL SLEEP A LOT BETTER KNOWING THAT.
NICE JOB, FELLA.
DETECTIVE SIMPSON DID MANAGE TO, UH...
RETRIEVE A VITAL PIECE OF EVIDENCE.
Yeah, with his head.
THIS...
IS PART OF A SHIPMENT OF EXPERIMENTAL WEAPONS
THAT WAS HIJACKED LAST TUESDAY.
THE FEDS BELIEVE IT WAS A GANG
LAST KNOWN TO BE OPERATING OUT OF CHICAGO
RUN BY THIS GUY-- CARL STARK.
AND ANY SHORT-TIME GOOF-OFF THAT DOESN'T BUST HIS ASS
TO BRING THIS GUY IN
IS GOING TO BE AS POPULAR AROUND THIS PRECINCT
AS A REGGAE BAND AT A KU KLUX KLAN RALLY.
IS THAT CLEAR, BURTY?
YEAH.
YOU THINK JUST BECAUSE I WEAR THIS UNIFORM
I STOP HAVING FEELINGS?
DON'T DO THIS TO US, ELIZABETH.
I'M NOT DOING ANYTHING. IT'S YOU.
YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND.
WHAT ARE YOU SAYING,
THAT I DON'T LOVE YOU?
THAT I DON'T NEED YOU?
I'M SAYING THAT I'M NOT JUST A COP, DAVID.
I'M A WOMAN, TOO.
I THOUGHT THIS WAS GOING TO HAPPEN.
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, BURT.
30 YEARS IN THE DEPARTMENT.
TWINKIE?
30 YEARS, AND HE ATTACKS MY WHOLE CAREER.
EXERCISE A LITTLE GOOD JUDGMENT
8 DAYS BEFORE I RETIRE.
LOOK, NOBODY'S CALLING YOU A COWARD.
HEY, CHICKEN SHIT!
NICE COLLAR, BOYS.
SCREW YOU, DAN.
YOU KNOW, IF YOU GUYS WANT TO SMOOCH,
YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO UP TO THE ROOF,
YOU CAN DO IT RIGHT IN HERE.
I SAID SCREW YOU.
JUST HUMOR HIM, ERNIE.
YOU KNOW, I'M GLAD YOU LET HIM GO,
'CAUSE IT'S GONNA LOOK GREAT ON MY RECORD
WHEN I GET HIM.
DAN, I DIDN'T KNOW YOU'D CUT A RECORD.
DAN MILLER ON THE ASSHOLE LABEL.
THAT'S FUNNY, DILLS.
THAT'S VERY FUNNY.
I THINK YOUR BUDDY FORGOT THIS.
DON'T HURT YOURSELF, OLD-TIMER.
I DON'T GET IT.
YOU GOT 8 DAYS LEFT ON THE FORCE.
NOW YOU WANT TO BUY LIFE INSURANCE?
GETTING SHOT IS NOT THE ONLY WAY
TO BUY THE FARM, PAL.
YOU KNOW THAT MORE MEN SUFFER
MASSIVE CORONARIES IN THEIR 50s
THAN ANY OTHER TIME IN THEIR LIVES.
ISN'T THAT SOMETHING?
I'M NOT KIDDING.
LIVER DYSFUNCTION, RENAL DISORDER,
DEGENERATIVE NERVE STUFF--
ALL THAT STUFF HAPPENS WHEN YOU'RE IN YOUR 50s.
BURT, STOP WORRYING ABOUT YOUR INSIDES SO MUCH.
I'M NOT WORRIED ABOUT MY INSIDES.
I'M WORRIED ABOUT DOUGIE.
SOMETHING HAPPENS TO ME,
HOW DOES HE GO TO COLLEGE?
HOW OLD IS HE AGAIN?
10...
AND 1/2.
SHOULDN'T YOU BE PLANNING AHEAD?
Woman: HAVE A SEAT, PLEASE, MR. SPIVAK.
YOU GUYS HERE FOR THE DRUG TEST?
HA! I WISH.
LIFE INSURANCE.
OH. I'M A LITTLE NERVOUS.
MY COMPANY SPRANG THIS ON ME
AT THE LAST MINUTE.
DO YOU THINK IF I SMOKED A JOINT
A COUPLE OF DAYS AGO,
IT MIGHT SHOW UP ON THIS THING?
WELL, BURT, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
DEFINITELY.
HOW DO YOU KNOW?
OF COURSE, I REALLY DIDN'T SMOKE A JOINT
A COUPLE OF DAYS AGO.
OK. MR. SIMPSON, MR. SPIVAK,
YOU CAN COME IN NOW.
JEEZ. ABOUT TIME.
THANKS, MR. SIMPSON.
YOU CAN GET DRESSED NOW.
BYE, MR. SIMPSON. HAVE A NICE DAY.
OH, YEAH. THANKS A LOT.
HEY, BOY.
HI.
HOW YOU DOING?
UH, I'M OK.
HERE YOU GO, MY MAN.
WOW!
WHAT DID YOU GET ME?
A SURPRISE.
HUH?
WHAT IS IT?
A BEER STEIN.
WITH THE HARVARD CREST ON IT.
BUT, DAD, I DON'T DRINK BEER.
WELL, IT'S JUST A SOUVENIR.
YOU JUST PUT IT UP ON A SHELF,
LOOK AT IT.
AH.
HOW'S YOUR MOM?
SHE'S OK.
YOU TELL HER I WAS COMING OVER?
YEAH.
YOU'RE NOT GOING TO DO IT, BURT.
HE'S 10-YEAR-OLD BOY,
AND YOU'RE NOT GOING TO GIVE HIM AN ULCER.
ONE LITTLE PRESENT.
OHH! THE PANTS, THE SWEAT SHIRTS.
IF THAT KID DOESN'T GET INTO HARVARD,
HE'S GONNA KILL HIMSELF.
HE'LL GET IN.
IT ISN'T FAIR, BURT.
YOU CAN'T MAP OUT SOMEBODY'S LIFE
20 YEARS IN ADVANCE.
WELL, NOTHING WRONG WITH A LITTLE HEAD START.
YOU'RE GOING TO GIVE HIM YOUR TWITCH.
WHAT TWITCH?
THAT TWITCH.
BURT.
KNOW WHAT HE ASKED ME THE OTHER NIGHT?
IF THEY WERE STILL GOING TO HAVE P.E. AT HARVARD.
WHAT'D YOU TELL HIM?
I TOLD HIM NOT TO WORRY ABOUT HARVARD YET.
OH, HONEY. JESUS.
I CAN'T DO IT, BURT.
YOU CAN'T LIVE HIS LIFE FOR HIM.
WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
IT MEANS THAT SOME THINGS ARE OUT OF YOUR CONTROL.
OH...YEAH. YEAH. HERE WE GO.
WELL, THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS.
NO, NO. WHY DON'T YOU SAY WHAT YOU REALLY MEAN.
THAT I'M UPTIGHT AND CONTROLLING AND--
THAT'S NOT WHAT I SAID.
LOOK, HONEY, I PLANNED MY WHOLE LIFE
SO THAT KID COULD GO TO COLLEGE.
WELL, GREAT.
CAN HE PLEASE FINISH GRAMMAR SCHOOL FIRST?
I'M ONLY DOING IT BECAUSE I LOVE HIM.
I KNOW YOU DO, BURT.
BUT THAT'S NOT LOVING HIM.
Woman: AHH!
AHH...
AHH!
ANIMALS.
HA HA HA!
YOU HAVE ONE MESSAGE.
WHAT DO YOU SAY, BOYS?
MR. SIMPSON,
THIS IS BECKY COLTON FROM THE GAS COMPANY.
AFTER 3 ATTEMPTS TO CONTACT YOU WITH NO RESPONSE,
THIS COURTESY CALL IS TO INFORM YOU
YOUR GAS WILL BE TURNED OFF TODAY AT 5 P.M.
THANK YOU FOR USING SEATTLE GAS AND ELECTRIC.
THAT WAS YOUR LAST MESSAGE.
Woman: OH!
OHH!
AAH!
Man: AAH!
Woman: AAH!
BLESS YOU, COWBOY.
AAH! AAH!
AWOO!
AAH! AAH!
Man: OH, GOD!
FRIGGING YAHOOS.
YEAH.
LET'S DO SOME BUSINESS.
NO. STAY HERE.
MR. SCALESE.
LET'S SEE THE MERCHANDISE.
OH, MAN. LOOK AT THIS SHIT.
THE BARRETT.
MODEL 82-A1, .50 CALIBER.
STARTRON SCOPE.
11-ROUND CAPACITY.
STAGGERED BOX MAGAZINE.
HEAVY.
WHAT ABOUT THE SHELLS?
LIKE I TOLD YOU,
.50 CALIBER, MAGNESIUM-TIPPED.
THE PRICE IS NOT NEGOTIABLE.
EVERYTHING'S NEGOTIABLE.
SCRATCH.
NO BULLET'S WORTH 20 BUCKS A POP.
YOU EVER BEEN SHOT AT WITH ONE OF THESE?
NO.
THAT WAS STUPID, YOU--OH.
OHH!
OHHH...
HE'S MY WIFE'S COUSIN.
SO YOU WANT TO DO SOME BUSINESS OR WHAT?
VITO, GET UP.
THERE'S NO DOUBT ABOUT IT.
SEE THE INFLAMMATION AROUND THE CELL WALL?
DISCOLORATION? COULDN'T BE ANYTHING ELSE.
REALLY?
NO QUESTION.
LOOK HOW THE SPORES INVADE THE CELL LINING THERE.
I MAY HAVE SEEN 3 OF THESE IN MY LIFE.
POOR GUY. HE WAS GOING TO RETIRE.
IT'S A SHAME.
YOU EAT YET?
36...
37...
38...
39...
40.
HELLO.
HEY, DOC. HOW YOU DOING?
WHEN, NOW?
WELL, I DON'T UNDERSTAND.
I MEAN...
WHERE, AT YOUR OFFICE?
WELL, YEAH. I--I CAN GET THERE ABOUT 2:00.
OK. YEAH, I'LL SEE YOU THEN. OK.
41...
42.
UH, BURT, THIS IS DR. GOLDMAN.
HE'S A HEMATOLOGIST.
HI. HOW ARE YOU?
I ASKED HIM TO COME IN HERE TODAY
BECAUSE IT APPEARS YOU HAVE
A RATHER RARE BLOOD DISORDER.
DISORDER?
YOU MEAN LIKE, UH,
LIKE A, UH
I'M GOING TO LET DR. GOLDMAN EXPLAIN,
SINCE HE'S AN EXPERT IN THE FIELD
AND CAN PROBABLY MAKE IT A LOT CLEARER THAN I CAN.
I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA EXPLAIN IT TO HIM.
WELL, YOU KNOW THE DISEASE.
YEAH.
BUT HE'S YOUR PATIENT.
UH...
WHAT'S GOING ON?
BURT, YOU HAVE A DISEASE
KNOWN AS AUTOTOXIC HEMATOSA.
THE COMMON NAME IS WEXLER'S CURTAIN.
IT'S A PROGRESSIVE BLOOD DISORDER
IN WHICH THE LYMPHATIC SYSTEM
ACTUALLY ATTACKS THE RED BLOOD CELLS,
MISTAKING THEM FOR AN INVADING VIRUS.
IT'S VERY RARE.
YEAH?
AS THE DISEASE PROGRESSES,
THE LINING OF THE CELLS BECOME WEAKENED
TO A POINT WHERE THEY CAN NO LONGER
OXYGENATE THE BODY.
THIS, OF COURSE, INCLUDES THE BRAIN.
WELL...
OF COURSE.
AS THE DEPRIVATION BECOMES MORE PRONOUNCED,
THE TISSUE ITSELF BEGINS TO DETERIORATE,
LITERALLY...SUFFOCATING FROM THE LACK OF OXYGEN.
THE ENTIRE PROCESS TAKES ABOUT, UH...
2 1/2 WEEKS.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND.
WELL...
WE'RE AFRAID IT'S TERMINAL.
TERMINAL
I OFTEN DON'T TELL PATIENTS
ABOUT SITUATIONS LIKE THIS
BECAUSE THERE'S NOTHING THEY CAN DO,
BUT IN YOUR CASE, THE PROGRESSION IS SO RAPID,
I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT NEED A CHANCE
TO GET YOUR AFFAIRS IN ORDER.
WHAT YOU'RE--WHAT YOU'RE SAYING
IS I'M DYING.
I'M, UH...
I'M REALLY DYING.
I'M AFRAID SO.
THE LATER STAGES ARE USUALLY MARKED
BY A NEUROLOGICAL BREAKDOWN.
SOME MEDICATION CAN TEMPER THIS, BUT--
WELL, WHAT ABOUT...
CHEMOTHERAPY?
UNFORTUNATELY, BURT...
THIS IS NOT CANCER.
OH...
YOUR BODY HAS ACTUALLY TURNED ON ITSELF.
I HATE TO HAVE TO TELL YOU THIS.
IT'S ALWAYS HARD FOR A DOCTOR
TO KNOW WHETHER HE SHOULD BE CANDID
WITH SOMEONE IN YOUR POSITION.
I JUST FELT TELLING YOU
WAS THE RIGHT THING TO DO
UNDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES.
YEAH, IT'S, UH...
YOU DID THE RIGHT THING.
IF THERE'S ANYTHING ELSE WE CAN DO...
PLEASE LET US KNOW.
IN THE MEANTIME, TAKE 2 OF THESE
AS SOON AS THE DIZZINESS STARTS.
[CHILDREN SHOUTING AND LAUGHING]
KEEP YOUR EYE ON THE BALL.
MOM.
MOM, I DON'T BELIEVE IT.
THEY ACCEPTED ME.
I HAVE BEEN OFFERED A PLACE AT HARVARD.
MOM?
I DON'T KNOW HOW TO TELL YOU THIS, HONEY.
WHAT IS IT, MOM?
WELL, 10 YEARS AGO, WHEN YOUR FATHER DIED,
THE INSURANCE COMPANY ONLY LEFT US $22,000.
WE'VE BEEN LIVING OFF OF THAT MONEY
FOR THE LAST 10 YEARS.
THERE ISN'T ANY MONEY LEFT, DOUGIE.
YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO GO TO HARVARD.
THERE'S ALWAYS COMMUNITY COLLEGE...
COLLEGE...
HI.
WHAT'S WRONG?
NOTHING.
YOU'RE-- YOU'RE GOING TO BE FINE.
I AM?
ABSOLUTELY.
WELL, YOU WANT TO COME IN?
YEAH.
BURT,
WHAT'S GOING ON?
I JUST DON'T WANT YOU TO WORRY.
WHAT WOULD I WORRY ABOUT?
THE FUTURE.
BURT, YOU'RE THE ONE THAT ALWAYS WORRIES
ABOUT THE FUTURE.
REMEMBER WHEN DOUGIE MADE THIS FOR US?
HONEY, DOUGIE DIDN'T MAKE THAT FOR US.
HE DIDN'T?
UH-UH.
BURT, WHAT'S GOING ON?
NOTHING.
YOU'RE GOING TO--
YOU'RE GOING TO BE FINE.
YOU'RE GONNA BE OK.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
DOUGIE, DOUGIE'S GONNA BE FINE.
HE'S GONNA BE GREAT.
WOULD YOU LIKE TO SIT DOWN?
NO, I DON'T HAVE TIME.
I MEAN, I DON'T MEAN IT THE WAY IT SOUNDS.
HONEY, I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW
THAT I'VE TAKEN CARE OF EVERYTHING.
I KNOW YOU KNOW THAT, BUT I'VE TAKEN CARE OF IT.
AND IT'S JUST AS TAKEN CARE OF
AS IT ALWAYS WAS.
BURT--
I'VE GOT TO GO-- I DON'T HAVE TO GO, BUT...
BURT, TALK TO ME. WHAT IS THE MATTER?
NOTHING.
BURT.
EVERYTHING'S FINE.
I CAN HANDLE IT.
Woman: HE LOOKS LIKE HE'S IN A BIG HURRY.
HEY!
OH, SURE. THE POLICY'S IN EFFECT
AS LONG AS YOU'RE STILL ON THE FORCE.
WELL, HOW MUCH, UH, HOW MUCH IS IT WORTH?
WELL, AT THIS POINT, $350,000.
350.
OK.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
THE ONLY THING IS...
WHAT?
IT'S LINE-OF-DUTY COVERAGE.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND.
WELL, IT MEANS YOU GOT TO GET, YOU KNOW...
KILLED?
THEY ONLY PAY OFF FOR LINE-OF-DUTY.
YOU CAN'T COLLECT ON ANYTHING ELSE.
OH.
OK. WELL, THANKS.
I WANT DOUBLE DUTY.
WHAT?
I WANT DOUBLE DUTY.
I DON'T GET IT. IS THIS SOME KIND OF JOKE?
I OWE IT TO THE DEPARTMENT.
BURT, IF THIS HAS ANYTHING TO DO
WITH WHAT I SAID IN THE SQUAD ROOM--
YOU'RE 2 CARS SHORT IN THE FLATS.
I'LL TAKE ONE OF THOSE.
ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
YOU SEEM A LITTLE TENSE.
TENSE?
LOOK, I KNOW HOW HARD THIS LAST WEEK IS.
I'VE SEEN A LOT OF GUYS GO THROUGH THIS.
WHY DON'T I PUT YOU HERE ON A DESK?
NO, DAMN IT!
I WANT DOUBLE DUTY.
NOW, YOU GOT TO GIVE IT TO ME.
FINE, BURT. YOU'VE GOT IT.
GOOD.
THANKS.
DOUBLE DUTY IN THE FLATS?
WE'RE STILL COPS, ERNIE.
BURT, IT'S LIKE WEST BEIRUT THERE,
AND YOU SIGNED US UP FOR 14 HOURS.
LET ME DRIVE.
LOOK, IF YOU'RE TRYING TO PROVE SOMETHING
ABOUT YESTERDAY...
IT'S NOT ABOUT YESTERDAY.
IT'S ABOUT TOMORROW.
IT'S PROBABLY THAT MALE MENOPAUSE, BURT.
WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LOSE YOUR HAIR
AND DATE UNSUITABLE WOMEN LIKE THE REST OF US?
RADIO WORKING?
WHAT?
THE RADIO, IS IT WORKING?
WHY WOULDN'T THE RADIO BE WORKING?
TOUGHEST NEIGHBORHOOD IN SEATTLE,
AND WE HAVEN'T HAD A CALL YET.
BURT, WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?
NOTHING'S THE MATTER WITH ME.
WHERE'S YOUR VEST?
I'M NOT WEARING A VEST.
YOU'RE NOT WEARING YOUR VEST?
NO, I'M NOT WEARING A VEST!
WHY DON'T YOU ISSUE A PRESS RELEASE ABOUT IT?
Radio: 2-CHARLIE-9. 2-CHARLIE-9.
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE IN PROGRESS,
1235 CHANTECLAIRE.
PROCEED CODE 3.
THAT'S MORE LIKE IT.
BURT, WHAT'S GOT INTO YOU?
OPEN UP! POLICE OFFICERS!
OPEN UP!
Woman: WHO?
POLICE!
Man: WHO'S DENISE?
POLICE!
I DON'T BELIEVE THIS.
SHE TRIED TO KILL ME.
WHAT?
JUST CALM DOWN, MA'AM.
WHAT?
UNBELIEVABLE.
SIR, CAN YOU TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED, PLEASE?
SHE HIT ME WITH AN IRON.
LOOK.
HE SAYS YOU HIT HIM WITH AN IRON.
WHO'S MYRON?
I DON'T BELIEVE THIS.
AN IRON. AN IRON.
HE SAYS YOU HIT HIM WITH AN IRON.
I DID.
HE'S A SKUNK.
WHY IS HE A SKUNK?
BECAUSE HE SAID HE WAS LEAVING.
SHE SAID THAT YOU SAID THAT YOU WERE LEAVING?
NO.
I SAID I WAS EATING.
OH, YOU...
JUST OPEN THE BOOK, LOOK AT THIS,
AND YOU CAN BE SAVED EVEN AS I WAS SAVED.
BECAUSE I WAS LIKE ANYBODY ELSE HERE.
YOU SAY, "NO, NO, THAT DOESN'T APPLY TO ME."
BUT I'M TELLING YOU NOW, THIS DOES APPLY TO YOU.
THIS IS YOUR LIGHT. THIS IS YOUR TRUTH.
HE TOOK ME DOWN AS LOW AS A MAN COULD GO...
I GOT YOU SOME YOGURT. PEACH OR BLUEBERRY?
BURT?
DO YOU BELIEVE IN LIFE AFTER DEATH?
LOOK, IF PEACH OR BLUEBERRY'S
TOO TOUGH A QUESTION...
DO YOU, UH...
DO YOU BELIEVE IN HEAVEN?
HEAVEN?
MM-HMM.
GEE, UH...
I DON'T KNOW, BURT.
I REMEMBER SOMETHING
MY DAD TALKED ABOUT, THOUGH,
AFTER HIS FIRST HEART ATTACK.
MM-HMM.
YOU KNOW THOSE STORIES ABOUT PEOPLE
WHO'VE ALMOST DIED?
THEY TALK ABOUT SEEING THIS TUNNEL
OF WHITE LIGHT
WHICH THEY KIND OF FLOAT UP INTO.
AT THE END OF IT,
THERE'S THIS BEAUTIFUL GARDEN
WITH ALL THE PEOPLE THAT THEY'VE EVER KNOWN
JUST WAITING FOR THEM. YEAH?
MY DAD WAS OUT FOR A COUPLE OF MINUTES.
WHEN THEY GOT HIM BACK, HE TALKED ABOUT IT.
WHAT DID HE SEE?
NOTHING.
NOTHING?
NO TUNNEL, NO FLOATING,
NO WHITE LIGHT.
JUST HIM,
LYING THERE ON THE BED ONE MINUTE,
AND THE NEXT...
SQUAT.
GIVE ME ONE OF THOSE.
BRAVO UNIT. BRAVO UNIT.
A SILVER PONTIAC. NEED ASSIST.
HIGH SPEED, SOUTHBOUND ON EAST SEATTLE PARKWAY.
CURRENTLY IN PURSUIT. RESPOND CODE 3.
THAT'S IT.
WHAT'S IT?
THIS IS IT.
BURT, WE'RE NOWHERE NEAR THE EAST SEATTLE PARKWAY!
UH, GET OUT OF THE CAR.
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
CHECK THE RIGHT REAR TIRE--IT'S LOW.
DOESN'T FEEL LOW.
IT'S LOW! GET OUT!
BURT. OH, GOD.
BURT!
YOUR YOGURT!
HOW FAST IS HE GOING?
I DON'T KNOW.
WELL, HOW FAST ARE WE GOING?
90.
WHAT'S HE TRYING TO DO, KILL HIMSELF?
THIS IS FOR YOU, DOUGIE.
YOU'RE GOING TO COLLEGE, LITTLE GUY.
AW, COME ON.
BLOW 'EM AWAY.
NO PROBLEM.
MACHINE GUNS.
ALL RIGHT!
GO! GO!
LOOK OUT!
GET THIS THING MOVING.
I'M WIDE OPEN!
YOU DIE!
GET THIS GUY OFF MY ASS!
RIGHT HERE!
JESUS!
GODDAMN IT!
GOOD-BYE, CAROLYN!
AW...
OH, SHIT.
BLOW THIS GUY AWAY!
COME ON! SHOOT!
OH!
HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT, YOU UGLY SON OF A BITCH?
THIS GUY'S CRAZY!
MOTHERF--
LOOK OUT! JEEZ!
WATCH IT! WATCH IT!
JEEZ!
YOU SON OF A BITCH!
GET AWAY FROM THIS GUY!
COME ON!
WANT TO PLAY ROUGH, YOU SON OF A BITCH?
LOOK OUT!
AAH!
WHERE DID HE GO?
NOW YOUR ASS IS MINE.
JEEZ!
WHOA-HO-WHOA!
WHOA!
MAN, THIS GUY IS PISSING ME OFF.
SON OF A BITCH.
LOOK OUT!
IT'S NOW OR NEVER, BURT, OLD BUDDY!
AAH!
UHH! UNH!
UHH! UHH! GET OFF MY FACE.
CAN'T YOU IDIOTS DO ANYTHING RIGHT?
FOR RISKING YOUR LIFE
IN SERVICE TO THIS DEPARTMENT,
FOR UNMATCHED BRAVERY
BEYOND THE CALL OF DUTY,
THE SEATTLE POLICE DEPARTMENT
IS PROUD TO PRESENT YOU
WITH THIS MEDAL OF VALOR,
ALONG WITH THE ACCOMPANYING CITATION.
WE'RE JUST GLAD YOU'RE STILL AROUND TO GET IT.
I DIDN'T STEAL THOSE LETTERS, DAVID.
I WROTE THEM.
YOU'RE NOT PREGNANT?
NO. I'M NOT PREGNANT.
I'M YOUR TWIN SISTER JOAN.
SHE DIED IN THE ORPHANAGE.
NO.
I DON'T GET IT.
SHH.
I ESCAPED, BUT LOST MY MEMORY.
I'M YOUR PARTNER, BURT. I WANT TO KNOW.
I TOLD YOU, THERE'S NOTHING THE MATTER.
YEAH, RIGHT. YOU KICK ME OUT OF THE CAR,
YOU DRIVE OFF THE SIDE OF A BUILDING.
AN IMPULSE.
I CAN'T TAKE ANYMORE.
PLEASE PUT THE GUN DOWN.
OHH.
HEY, BURTY.
WHAT DO YOU WANT?
I JUST WANT TO CONGRATULATE YOUR PARTNER.
GUESS WHO YOU SQUASHED.
LUTZ, JONAS B., AND HIS BROTHER MICHAEL.
SO?
2 RIGHT-HAND MEN TO ONE CARL STARK,
GUN SMUGGLER SUPREME
AND KILLER IN COLD BLOOD
OF ANY COPS WHO CROSS HIS PATH.
IT'S THE BIG TIME, BURT.
YOU BAGGED A COUPLE OF STARS.
I DON'T WANT TO TELL YOU HOW TO LIVE YOUR LIFE,
BUT I'D GET A BULLETPROOF HOUSE IF I WERE YOU.
YEAH. EASY COME, EASY GO, HUH?
CAN I HELP YOU?
OH, UM...
YEAH.
I, UM...
I'D LIKE TO...
TO BUY A, UM...
A HOUSING?
EXCUSE ME?
WE CALL THEM HOUSINGS.
OH.
WELL...YEAH.
WHAT SORT OF PRICE RANGE ARE YOU LOOKING AT?
WELL, I...I...
I REALLY DON'T KNOW.
IS THERE--IS THERE A BIG DIFFERENCE?
OH, SURE.
WE'VE GOT EVERYTHING FROM 1,800 UP TO 60,000.
$60,000?
IT'S TITANIUM ALLOY.
IT'S...ALL A QUESTION OF DURABILITY.
MOST PEOPLE THINK
THEY JUST PUT YOU IN THE GROUND
AND THE NEXT THING, YOU'RE DUST,
BUT THERE'S LOTS OF INTERMEDIATE STAGES.
I MEAN, YOU WANT SOMETHING THAT'S REALLY GONNA HOLD UP
WHEN THE BODY STARTS TO ROT.
WAS IT A LOVED ONE?
WELL, UH...
I GUESS. YEAH.
A FRIEND?
SORT OF. YEAH.
SOME PEOPLE THINK IT'S SILLY
TO MATCH THE HOUSING WITH THE INDIVIDUAL,
BUT LET'S FACE IT,
THEY'RE GONNA BE IN THERE
FOR AN AWFULLY LONG TIME.
YEAH.
WELL, UH... I DON'T KNOW.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY.
HE WAS, UH...
REASONABLE.
REASONABLE?
YEAH. HE WAS...
AND HE WAS YOUNG.
50, YOU KNOW, JUST TURNED 50.
OH, THAT'S VERY SAD.
YEAH...IT IS.
IT IS SAD.
DID I TELL YOU HE WAS A COP?
DID I TELL YOU THAT ALREADY?
NO. YEAH.
30 YEARS ON THE FORCE
AND ABOUT 5 DAYS FROM HIS PENSION.
AND NOW...
IT ISN'T FAIR SOMETIMES.
HE ONCE WANTED THIS CONVERTIBLE,
LITTLE RED MUSTANG.
HE DECIDED HE WANTED TO SAVE,
TO PUT SOMETHING AWAY FOR THE FUTURE.
SURE.
WELL...
IS THAT SO WRONG?
SO WRONG TO WANT TO PUT SOMETHING AWAY,
SOMETHING TO RELY ON?
NO.
NOT THAT YOU CAN RELY ON ANYTHING THESE DAYS.
NOTHING MAKES ANY SENSE.
IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE TO DIE AT 50.
IS THAT SENSIBLE?
I DON'T KNOW.
I GUESS YOU JUST GOT TO LIVE FOR TODAY.
LIVE FOR TODAY.
YEAH. YOU KNOW,
LET THE FUTURE TAKE CARE OF ITSELF.
LET THE FUTURE T--
LIVE FOR TODAY,
AND LET THE FUTURE TAKE CARE OF ITSELF.
HOW ABOUT SOMETHING IN A NICE CEDAR?
BURT.
LISTEN, UH...
I'M SORRY.
ABOUT WHAT?
EVERYTHING.
THAT'S A LOT.
I'M SORRY ABOUT THE OTHER DAY.
SORRY ABOUT THE PAST 5 YEARS.
I'M SORRY ABOUT THIS TOASTER.
TOASTER?
THE TOASTER. YEAH, THIS TOASTER.
REMEMBER, YOU WANTED ONE WITH THE TOP BROWN?
I MADE YOU BUY THIS
BECAUSE IT HAS A BETTER WARRANTY.
I WAS WRONG, AND I'M SORRY.
I ACCEPT YOUR APOLOGY.
SORRY ABOUT THOSE PLASTIC SLIPCOVERS, TOO.
I, UH...
I'M REALLY SORRY
I MADE YOU CLIP THESE DAMN COUPONS.
BURT, WHAT IS THE MATTER?
NOTHING.
EVERYTHING, UH...
EVERYTHING'S FINE.
I CAN TELL.
IT IS. REALLY.
EVERYTHING IS WONDERFUL.
I, UH...
I LOVE YOU.
JESUS, BURT.
I DO.
NOT IN THE WAY I EVER LOVED YOU BEFORE.
I LOVE YOU.
I MEAN YOU.
I DON'T LOVE US,
THE HOUSE, THE JOINT TAX RETURNS--
STOP IT, BURT.
I LOVE THE WAY YOU SNORT WHEN YOU LAUGH.
YOU HATE THE WAY I SNORT.
EXACTLY. THAT'S THE POINT.
LOOK. I NEED YOU TO KNOW THIS, CAROLYN.
I HAVE TO HAVE YOU KNOW THIS RIGHT NOW.
YOU ALWAYS TOLD ME NOT TO SNORT
WHEN WE WENT OUT.
I HATE MYSELF FOR THAT.
IS THIS A MID
YES.
SORT OF.
WANT SOME HAWAIIAN PUNCH?
DO YOU REMEMBER
WHEN WE WENT TO YOUR SISTER'S HOUSE,
AND YOU CAME INTO THE BATHROOM WITH ME,
AND YOU WANTED TO-- BURT.
AND A PARTY WAS GOING ON OUTSIDE,
AND YOU WERE A LITTLE DRUNK,
AND YOU WERE WEARING THE BLUE DRESS.
THAT'S ENOUGH.
WELL, I WANTED TO, TOO.
NO, YOU DIDN'T--
YES, I DID!
I JUST THOUGHT WITH ALL THOSE PEOPLE,
I THOUGHT THEY'D HEAR US.
AND I GOT-- I GOT CHICKEN.
BURT, I THINK YOU BETTER GO.
NO.
NO, I'M NOT GOING TO LEAVE.
DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN YOU USED TO...
SING TO DOUGIE
WHEN HE WAS A BABY?
I USED TO STAND OUT IN THE HALL...
AND JUST WATCH YOU.
AND SOMETIMES I WOULD-- I WOULD START CRYING.
AND WHEN DOUGIE WAS BEING BORN,
I MADE THE NURSE LET ME STAND IN THE DOORWAY
SO I COULD HEAR THAT YOU WERE ALL RIGHT.
AND WHEN YOU WERE TAKING THOSE DRAWING CLASSES
AND YOU'D COME HOME
AND THROW AWAY SOME OF YOUR PICTURES,
I PICKED ALL THOSE PICTURES
OUT OF THE GARBAGE,
AND I PUT THEM IN A DRAWER.
THAT'S THE WAY I'VE ALWAYS FELT ABOUT YOU.
I JUST HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO SAY IT.
JESUS, BURT.
OHH.
IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME SINCE I FELT LIKE THAT.
ME, TOO.
YOU MEAN, YOU HAVEN'T--
NO.
NOT REALLY.
HAVE YOU?
NO...
NOT REALLY.
YOU EVER NOTICE HOW PERFECT A TULIP IS?
WHAT?
THE PETALS,
THEY OPEN UP LIKE...
TINY LITTLE BELLS.
BURT, WILL YOU PLEASE TELL ME
WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?
I JUST THINK IT'S WONDERFUL, THAT'S ALL.
IT'S AN INCREDIBLE THING.
MY PARTNER'S TURNING INTO OSCAR WILDE.
ALL UNITS, ALL UNITS.
111 IN PROGRESS.
REPEAT. 111 IN PROGRESS.
1800 MARSHALL AVENUE. PROCEED CODE 3.
LET'S GO. COME ON.
GET IN YOUR POSITIONS.
GET BACK THERE.
YES, SIR.
GLAD YOU GUYS COULD MAKE IT.
WHAT'S GOING ON?
YEAH, WHAT'S GOING ON?
FREAKIN' LOONY TOON'S
GOT HIMSELF WIRED TO 8 STICKS OF DYNAMITE.
WANTS TO TALK TO THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES
OR HIS EX-WIFE.
EX
YEAH. EVERY TIME WE GET CLOSE,
HE SAYS, "LOVE IS DEAD IN THE WORLD."
I'M READY, CAPTAIN.
SHUT UP, DILLS.
ALL RIGHT, PEOPLE. LET'S GET READY!
Officer: STANDING BY.
WHERE'S BURT?
EXCUSE ME.
OH, NO.
WHAT THE HELL?
HEY, SIMPSON!
SIMPSON!
THIS IS MY--UNH!
SIMPSON!
SIMPSON, THIS IS MY BUST, SIMPSON.
SIMPSON, YOU LISTEN TO ME.
SIMPSON!
HI.
MY NAME'S BURT.
LOVE IS DEAD IN THE WORLD.
I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.
YOU DO?
YEAH.
LIKE...
LIKE IT JUST GOT...
LOST OR SOMETHING.
LIKE IT JUST FROZE ALONG THE WAY.
I, UH...
I HEARD ABOUT YOUR WIFE.
YOLANDA?
YOLANDA.
I KNOW HOW MUCH PAIN YOU MUST BE IN.
SO YOU'RE GOING TO BLOW YOURSELF UP
BECAUSE YOU THINK
SHE DOESN'T LOVE YOU ANYMORE?
I--I THINK...
MAYBE SHE STILL LOVES YOU.
YOU DO?
YES, I DO.
WHEN, UH...
WHEN'S THE LAST TIME YOU TOLD HER YOU LOVE HER?
A LONG TIME AGO, HUH?
YOU SLOWLY STOP TALKING TO EACH OTHER,
AND ONE DAY YOU CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER
WHY YOU FELL IN LOVE WITH EACH OTHER
IN THE FIRST PLACE, RIGHT?
OBVIOUSLY, YOU CAN REMEMBER THAT NOW
OR YOU WOULDN'T BE
GOING THROUGH ALL THIS BUSINESS.
OH...
GO AHEAD AND BLOW YOURSELF UP IF YOU WANT.
YOU'RE SURE GOING TO BE MISSING A LOT.
DO YOU--DO YOU HAVE ANY KIDS?
MICKEY AND MIKEY.
MICKEY AND M-- HOW OLD ARE THEY?
3 1/2 AND 5.
WELL, IF YOU'RE GONE,
WHO'S GOING TO SEE THEY GRADUATE HIGH SCHOOL?
HOW YOU GONNA FIND OUT
WHETHER THEY--THEY FOUND A NICE GIRL, HUH?
WHETHER MIKEY'S STUTTER EVER CLEARED UP?
MIKEY DOESN'T STUTTER--
I UNDERSTAND,
BUT LET'S JUST SAY HE DID.
THERE'S SO MUCH...
THERE ARE SO MANY... SO MANY LITTLE THINGS
THAT WE DON'T EVEN NOTICE UNTIL THEY'RE GONE.
AND MICKEY...
CAN MICKEY RIDE A BIKE?
DON'T YOU WANT TO TEACH HIM
HOW TO RIDE A BIKE OR SEE HIM GET BRACES
OR FINALLY TOUCH THE TOP OF THE DOORJAMB?
HOW'D YOU KNOW ABOUT THE DOORJAMB?
LOOK, PAL, COME ON.
YOU MAY THINK YOU KNOW HIM,
BUT I BET YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO HIS TEACHER IS
OR THE NAMES OF THE MONSTERS IN HIS ROOM...
OR WHY HE BURIED HIS SHOES THAT TIME
OR WHY HE MADE YOU CALL HIM PETER
FOR A WHOLE MONTH.
YOU JUST TAKE THINGS LIKE THAT FOR GRANTED.
THEN ONE DAY,
THERE'S THIS STRANGER STANDING IN THE DOOR
AND SAYING,
"CAN I BORROW THE CAR KEYS, DAD?"
YOU DON'T KNOW HOW IT GOT THAT WAY.
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING THERE.
IT'S GONE THEN.
ONCE IT'S GONE,
YOU CAN'T GET IT BACK...
NO MATTER HOW HARD YOU TRY.
NO ONE SHOULD KILL HIMSELF.
NO ONE SHOULD DO THAT.
HOW DID I GET SO STUPID?
THANK YOU.
OK, PAL.
OK, COME WITH US.
HELL OF A JOB, BURT.
COMPLETELY INSANE, BUT A HELL OF A JOB.
REALLY, FIRST RATE.
COME ON, GET THE SHOT.
ALL RIGHT, FOLKS.
THERE'S ONE THING, BURT. WHERE'S THE BOMB?
THE BOMB?
YEAH.
AND IN RECOGNITION
OF AN ACT OF OUTSTANDING HEROISM,
THE SEATTLE POLICE DEPARTMENT AWARDS YOU
THE SILVER CROSS.
BURT, YOU DIDN'T EVEN MAKE A SPEECH.
I'M IN A HURRY.
WHY? WHERE YOU GOING?
HAVEN'T GOT TIME, ERNIE.
BURT, WHERE YOU GOING?
YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE, SIMPSON.
JESUS.
MILLER, NOT NOW, OK?
WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?
HE'S MY PARTNER, SHIT-FOR-BRAINS.
HOLD IT, HOLD IT, HOLD IT. LOOK, LOOK, LOOK.
I'M--I'M SORRY I TOOK YOUR BUST, ALL RIGHT?
IF I COULD, I'D PUT IT ON YOUR RECORD.
IT REALLY DOESN'T MATTER TO ME, PAL.
THAT'S NOWHERE NEAR GOOD ENOUGH.
WELL, IT'S GONNA HAVE TO BE GOOD ENOUGH FOR NOW,
BECAUSE I'M IN A BIG, BIG HURRY.
I DON'T GIVE A SHIT,
BECAUSE WE'RE HAVING IT OUT RIGHT NOW.
HEH HEH HEH. MILLER, LOOK,
I, UH, I'M NOT GOING TO SWING AT YOU.
BECAUSE YOU'RE A WUSS, SIMPSON.
JUST LIKE I ALWAYS THOUGHT YOU WERE.
YEAH.
WELL, YOU KNOW, MAYBE YOU'RE RIGHT.
ON THE OTHER HAND...
YOU COULD BE WRONG.
I LOVE YOU, BURT SIMPSON.
DOUGIE!
HEY, BOY.
HOW YOU DOING?
I'M OK. HUH?
I'M FINE.
WHO YOU TALKING TO OUT THERE?
JUST MY BUDDIES.
OH, GOT YOU RIGHT WHERE I WANT YOU.
DAD, I CAN'T BREATHE.
I GOT YOU NOW.
DO YOU GIVE?
UNCLE! UNCLE!
ARE YOU REALLY SURE?
NEVER BEEN SO SURE OF ANYTHING IN MY LIFE.
JESUS!
YOU'RE ALL SET, MR. SIMPSON.
OK, GREAT. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
YOU'RE WELCOME.
SO, YOU ALL SET, MR. SIMPSON?
YOU BET.
ALL RIGHT.
♪ THE WAY THAT YOU LOVE ♪
♪ IS GOOD AS MONEY... ♪
DO YOU LIKE IT?
HEY!
I LOVE IT.
DAD, WAIT A MINUTE.
THIS IS A REALLY GOOD SONG.
THIS
YEAH.
♪ YOU CAN MAKE IT ♪
♪ ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ WHEN THIS WORLD TURNS ITS BACK ON YOU ♪
♪ HANG IN, AND DO THE SWEET THING YOU DO ♪
♪ YOU JUST ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ HEY, HEY ♪
♪ YOU JUST ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ HANG ON ♪
♪ AND JUST ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ HANG ON ♪
♪ AND JUST ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
HOW'D YOU KNOW ABOUT THIS PLACE?
WE CAME HERE WITH MISS GRAHAM.
WE'RE DOING A PROJECT ON THE RAIN FOREST.
ARE YOU? YEAH.
WOW! LOOK AT THIS GUY.
OH, MY GOD.
I LIKE HIM. HE'S A BIRD-EATING SPIDER.
BIRD
EXCEPT HE DOESN'T REALLY EAT BIRDS.
NO?
HE EATS THINGS LIKE MICE AND BUGS,
BUT HE CAN KILL BIRDS IF HE HAS TO,
YOU KNOW, IF THEY GET TOO CLOSE
TO HIS HOLE WHERE HE LIVES.
YEAH. I SEE.
BECAUSE IT'S SO HOT, THEY LIVE IN HOLES.
IT'S COOLER UNDER THE GROUND
AND SAFER WHILE THEY'RE SLEEPING.
YOU MUST KNOW A LOT ABOUT BUGS, HUH?
HEH. YEAH.
I DIDN'T KNOW THAT.
THEY'RE NOT MY FAVORITE.
BASEBALL'S STILL MY FAVORITE,
THEN DINOSAURS AND THEN BUGS.
HEY, DAD. YOU GOT TO SEE THIS.
ISN'T HE COOL?
OH, YEAH.
WOW.
SCARY, HUH?
YEAH.
BIRD-EATING SPIDER.
THEY LIVE IN HOLES.
GOOD NIGHT.
DAD?
CAN WE DO IT AGAIN NEXT WEEK?
WE'LL SEE.
OK.
REMEMBER WHEN WE FIRST MOVED IN, BURT?
HOW WE PLANNED THIS PORCH WOULD BE?
WHITEWASHED DECKS
AND THAT OLD SUMMER CHAIR ERNIE'S SISTER GAVE US
HANGING OVER THERE.
WHATEVER HAPPENED TO THAT CHAIR?
MMM, IT'S STILL IN THE GARAGE, I THINK.
MMM.
OH, BURT, I FEEL SO LUCKY.
I REALLY THOUGHT IT WAS ALL OVER FOR US.
I'D EVEN GIVEN UP HOPING,
BUT...SOMEHOW
YOU MADE IT ALL HAPPEN FOR US AGAIN, BURT.
NO, I DIDN'T, HONEY.
YES, YOU DID.
AND SUDDENLY
I FEEL LIKE WE HAVE A FUTURE AGAIN.
I LOVE YOU, BURT SIMPSON.
I LOVE YOU, TOO.
BURT?
OH, BURT.
THE GUY SAYS TO HIM, HE SAYS,
"OK, SO WHAT ARE TORNADOES FOR?"
AND THEN THE PRIEST, THE PRIEST, HE SAYS,
"WELL, THEY'RE GOD'S ANSWER
TO TRAILER PARKS."
WHAT?
NEVER MIND.
I GUESS YOU HEARD ABOUT TUCKER.
NO.
GOT BLOWN AWAY THIS AFTERNOON.
YEAH. HE PULLS THIS GUY OVER
FOR MAKING AN ILLEGAL RIGHT,
HE ASKS HIM FOR HIS LICENSE,
AND BLAM, HE TAKES 2 ROUNDS IN THE CHEST.
THEY I.D. THE GUY?
CARL STARK. BOSS OF THOSE 2 GUYS
THAT YOU PUT IN THE HOSPITAL.
THAT GUY'S AN EVIL SON OF A BITCH.
STARK.
SHIT. I'M GETTING HUNGRY.
WANT TO GET SOMETHING TO EAT?
WHAT?
WHEN'S THE LAST TIME I BOUGHT YOU DINNER?
I DON'T KNOW. COUPLE WEEKS AGO?
NO, THAT'S NOT RIGHT. YOU GOT THE PIZZAS MONDAY.
EXACTLY.
YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?
THAT JACKET IS YOU, PAL.
THANKS.
I JUST WANT TO BUY YOU A LITTLE DINNER.
DINNER'S A PIZZA, BURT, OR A CHEESEBURGER,
NOT LOBSTER THERMIDOR.
ERNIE, YOU WERE BEST MAN AT MY WEDDING,
GODFATHER TO MY SON.
WE'VE BEEN PARTNERS FOR 10 YEARS.
WHAT KIND OF A WORLD WOULD IT BE
IF I COULDN'T JUST ONCE SPEND MORE
THAN 3 LOUSY DOLLARS BUYING YOU DINNER?
NOTHING'S WORTH 90 BUCKS A PLATE.
YOU ARE, PAL.
MORE WINE, SIR?
YEAH, PLEASE. IN FACT,
LET ME HAVE A BOTTLE OF YOUR BEST CHAMPAGNE.
BURT.
ERNIE, I HAVE JUST FOUND OUT SOMETHING
THAT'S SO IMPORTANT
I CAN'T BELIEVE
IT TOOK ME THIS LONG TO FIND OUT.
WHAT?
YOU CAN'T SPEND YOUR WHOLE LIFE
PLANNING WHAT'LL MAKE YOU HAPPY TOMORROW
OR YOU'LL NEVER BE HAPPY TODAY.
YOU GOT TO DO IT NOW.
AND THAT INCLUDES YOUR, UH, HOT TUBS.
I WAS WRONG ABOUT LEWIS.
IT'S A GOOD DEAL. GREAT IDEA.
THANK YOU.
YOU GOT TO GO FOR IT, ERNIE.
YOU GOT TO ENJOY IT.
OOH, I ALMOST FORGOT.
THESE ARE FOR YOU.
WHAT ARE THESE?
KEYS TO MY MUSTANG.
YOU BOUGHT A MUSTANG?
LITTLE RED CONVERTIBLE.
I WANT YOU TO HAVE IT.
THAT'S IT, BUDDY.
YOU'RE SEEING A DOCTOR.
YOU'RE COMPLETELY OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND.
SIT DOWN. SIT DOWN. SIT DOWN. SIT DOWN.
ERNIE, HAVE YOU EVER DRIVEN A CONVERTIBLE?
DO YOU KNOW HOW IT FEELS WHEN THE TOP'S DOWN,
SUN'S OUT, WIND'S GOING THROUGH YOUR HAIR?
DO YOU KNOW HOW ALIVE IT MAKES YOU FEEL?
I WANT YOU TO HAVE THAT FEELING.
I WANT YOU TO FEEL ALIVE.
LISTEN, ANOTHER THING.
COME HERE.
I LOVE YOU, PAL.
OH, GOD.
FINALLY, HE TAKES ME OUT FOR A $400 MEAL,
KISSES ME, AND GIVES ME THESE,
THE KEYS TO HIS NEW CONVERTIBLE.
WHAT THE HELL'S WRONG WITH HIM?
AND TODAY IS HIS LAST DAY ON THE FORCE?
MM-HMM.
I REALLY DON'T THINK YOU NEED TO WORRY MUCH.
HE SAID HE LOVED ME.
MANY OFFICERS ON THE POINT OF RETIREMENT
EXPERIENCE A SURGE OF CONTRADICTORY FEELINGS.
SOME RELATE TO AN IMMINENT LOSS OF POWER,
OTHERS TO A FEAR OF MAKING IT ALONE
OUTSIDE THE CLOSE CAMARADERIE OF THE FORCE.
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND. BURT'S NOT LIKE THIS.
NOT AT ALL.
THIS IS LIKE DRIVING AROUND
WITH A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT GUY.
WELL, I SUPPOSE IT'S JUST POSSIBLE
HE COULD BE SUFFERING
FROM SOME FORM OF MANIC-DEPRESSION.
HOW CAN WE FIND OUT?
WELL, IT'S ACTUALLY A CHEMICAL IMBALANCE.
IT WOULD SHOW UP ON A SIMPLE BLOOD TEST.
MORNING.
GOOD MORNING.
HI. MORNING.
MORNING.
HOW ABOUT A LITTLE BREAK?
GEE, THANKS A LOT.
YEAH.
OH.
HA HA HA.
HELLO, BOYS.
JESUS, IT'S HIM.
JUST GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE.
AWW. NOW DOES THAT MEAN
YOU'RE NOT GOING TO TELL ME WHERE STARK IS?
WELL, UM, LOOK, I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.
I'M GOING TO LEAVE YOU MY NUMBER.
RIGHT HERE.
IF YOU CHANGE YOUR MIND, JUST GIVE ME A CALL.
CAN YOU READ THAT?
OH, YOU CAN'T SEE FROM THERE, CAN YOU?
OH, WAIT A MINUTE.
OHH! AAH!
THAT BETTER?
AAH!
JESUS!
HUH? YOU'D LIKE TO READ IT?
OWW!
GUARD!
CAN YOU READ THIS?
YEAH, I CAN READ THAT.
EXCELLENT.
OWW!
UGH! UGH!
GO AHEAD.
WHAT?
WHAT'S MY NUMBER?
SCREW YOU.
YOU WEREN'T REALLY SERIOUS
ABOUT CALLING ME, WERE YOU?
I'LL TELL YOU WHERE STARK IS.
GOOD BOY.
CAN YOU TELL ME WHAT ROOM DR. DREXLER'S IN, PLEASE?
DREXLER?
YES. IT'S VERY IMPORTANT.
ONE MOMENT.
DR. DREXLER'S ON THE SECOND FLOOR,
ROOM 207.
207. THANKS.
I'M AFRAID IT'S COMPLETELY OUT OF THE QUESTION.
ALL PATIENTS' RECORDS ARE STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL.
BUT I HAVE TO SEE THEM.
NOT WITHOUT MR. SIMPSON'S WRITTEN AUTHORIZATION.
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND. I'M A COP.
SO? SHOW ME YOUR WARRANT.
SCREW THIS.
PUT THOSE BACK. THIS IS OUTRAGEOUS.
HE'S MY PARTNER.
WELL, YOUR PARTNER IS DYING.
WHAT?
I SAID HE'S DYING.
AU--AUTOTOXIA HEMA--
TOSA. WEXLER'S CURTAIN.
THAT'S WHY I DIDN'T REPORT
THE MARIJUANA TRACE.
MARIJUANA?
THAT'S WHAT I SAID.
YOU MUST HAVE KNOWN THERE WAS SOMETHING WRONG
WHEN HE BEGAN TO GO BLIND.
BLIND?
WHERE THE HELL IS SIMPSON, DILLS?
I DON'T KNOW, SIR. I GOT TO FIND HIM.
DAMN RIGHT YOU GOTTA FIND HIM.
THERE'S 2 GUYS THERE IN TRACTION CLAIMING
HE BUSTED IN AND BEAT ON THEM
TILL THEY TOLD HIM WHERE STARK WAS.
COULD'VE BLOWN THE WHOLE THING.
SHIT.
HEY, ED. UH, CAPTAIN WANTS TO SEE YOU.
I'LL TAKE OVER HERE.
GO ON, GET GOING.
Dills: WHERE THE HELL IS MY PARTNER?
OWW! OWW!
LET'S GO. COME ON.
USED 20s.
THAT'S GREAT.
WE GOT TO DO THIS MORE OFTEN.
I DEDUCTED FOR THE DAMAGES ON THE DOORS.
WHAT?
NO!
POLICE! FREEZE!
IT'S THE HEAT!
LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!
VITO, LET'S GO!
HE WRECKED THE LINCOLN!
I SAID POLICE! FREEZE!
SHIT.
COME ON.
LIKE I SAID, POLICE. FREEZE.
GO AHEAD.
MAKE MY DAY.
WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM, STUPID?
THIS IS RIDICULOUS.
STARK.
THANK GOD. I THOUGHT I'D LOST YOU.
YOU ARE ONE CRAZY SON OF A BITCH.
I LIKE THAT.
YOU'RE STILL GOING TO BLOW ME AWAY,
THOUGH, AREN'T YOU?
I'M GOING TO KILL YOU.
GOD! AAH!
WAIT UP!
WAIT. YOU DIDN'T GET ME.
SHIT!
WHAT KIND OF A COP KILLER ARE YOU?
CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS GUY?
YES!
COME BACK.
OH, NO.
YOU MISSED ME AGAIN, YOU IDIOT.
OHH!
WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?
THIS IS REALLY PISSING ME OFF.
HEY, STUPID.
HEY, WATCH OUT, MAN.
LOOK, I'M JUST GONNA SAY THIS ONCE,
SO LISTEN UP.
EITHER YOU COME UP HERE AND KILL ME,
OR I'M GONNA CLIMB DOWN AND PULL US BOTH OFF.
YOU GOT IT?
UGH!
OK, PAL. THAT'S IT.
[ENGINE WHINING, SCREECHING]
AAAH!
AWW! HA HA HA HA HA!
NOW YOU'VE REALLY PISSED ME OFF.
GOOD. PISSED OFF IS GOOD.
BURT!
ERNIE?
BURT! BURT! LISTEN CAREFULLY!
YOU'RE NOT SICK!
WHAT?
HE SAID YOU'RE NOT SICK.
SHUT UP.
WHAT?
DR. DREXLER MADE A MISTAKE!
YOU'RE NOT GOING TO DIE!
I'M NOT GOING TO DIE?
I'M NOT GOING TO DIE.
I'M GOING TO DIE. I'M GOING TO DIE.
DAMN RIGHT, SUCKER.
ERNIE! UHH!
DO SOMETHING! OW!
DO SOMETHING! COME ON!
SHOOT THE SON OF A BITCH!
SAYONARA, SUCKER.
HELP ME!
YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING.
HANG ON, BURT!
AAH! AAH!
AAAH!
BURT, YOU OK?
I'M NOT GOING TO DIE.
DON'T LOOK DOWN!
JUST DON'T LOOK DOWN.
DON'T WORRY. HANG ON, BUDDY!
BACKUP'S ON THE WAY!
DON'T LOOK DOWN.
AAH!
DEARLY BELOVED,
WE WHO GATHER HERE COME FROM MANY DIFFERENT STAGES
IN OUR JOURNEY THROUGH LIFE,
WITH DIFFERENT WAYS OF LOOKING AT LIFE AND DEATH.
WE GATHER HERE TO MOURN A MAN,
A FRIEND TO THOSE THAT KNEW AND LOVED HIM,
A MAN WHO SERVED THIS CITY WELL,
A MAN WHO WORE HIS UNIFORM WITH PRIDE.
COULDN'T HE HURRY IT UP A LITTLE?
ONE THING WE HAVE IN COMMON.
SHOW A LITTLE RESPECT.
AT SOME POINT, OUR LIVES WERE TOUCHED
BY HIM WHOM WE MOURN HERE,
AND OUR LIVES TOUCHED HIM.
HIS SUDDEN DEPARTURE FROM AMONG US
HAS CUT ACROSS ALL OUR LIVES.
DAD.
WHO WAS THIS GUY?
HE DROVE BUSES...
ALSO GAVE ME BACK MY LIFE.
A TIME FOR EVERY MATTER UNDER HEAVEN.
CAROLYN.
CAPTAIN.
WELL, YOU MADE IT.
JUST ABOUT, ANYWAY.
I WAS HANGING OUT OF THE CHOPPER.
SHUT UP, DILLS.
PRECINCT'S NOT GOING TO BE THE SAME WITHOUT YOU.
WELL...
OH, I ALMOST FORGOT.
THE HELICOPTER PILOT SENT THAT OVER.
THOUGHT YOU MIGHT LIKE TO SEE IT.
NOT MY BEST ANGLE, IS IT?
LOOK, YOUR FLY'S OPEN.
KEEP THIS. I'LL SIGN IT FOR YOU LATER.
THANKS A LOT, CAPTAIN.
THANKS FOR COMING OUT HERE.
I APPRECIATE IT, OK?
THANKS A LOT, SIR.
HERE WE GO, HONEY.
READY?
YOU GOT THE KEYS, ERNIE?
DAMN RIGHT. IT'S MY CAR.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S YOUR CAR?
HE GAVE IT TO ME.
YOU GAVE IT TO HIM?
WHEN I THOUGHT I WAS DYING.
THAT'S NOT MY FAULT, PAL.
SO, CAN I BORROW THE CAR?
OK, BUT IT'S 10 CENTS A MILE.
FIGURES.
GREAT. BACK SEAT AND IT'S MY CAR.
KEYS. KEYS.
YOU OK, HONEY?
OW! PIECE OF CAKE.
SO, WHERE DO YOU WANT TO GO?
BURT! BURT!
DADDY!
SO, WHERE DO YOU WANT TO GO?
Dougie: I WANT TO GO TO THE PARK.
Dills: I WANT TO GO TO A BAR.
I'D KIND OF LIKE TO GO HOME.
♪ WHEN LIFE IS TOO MUCH ♪
♪ ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ DON'T STOP AND LOSE YOUR TOUCH ♪
♪ OH NO, BABY ♪
♪ HARD TIMES KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR ♪
♪ I'LL THEM YOU AIN'T THERE NO MORE ♪
♪ GET ON THROUGH IT ♪
♪ ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ LUCK'LL COME AND THEN SLIP AWAY ♪
♪ YOU'VE GOT A MOVE ♪
♪ BRING IT BACK TO STAY ♪
♪ YOU JUST ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ COME ON AND JUST ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ YOU AND ME ♪
♪ ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ HANG ON AND JUST ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ HEY ♪
♪ THE WAY THAT YOU LOVE ♪
♪ IS GOOD AS MONEY ♪
♪ I SWEAR BY THE STARS ABOVE ♪
♪ SWEET AS HONEY ♪
♪ PEOPLE THINK YOU'RE DOWN AND OUT ♪
♪ YOU SHOW THEM WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT ♪
♪ YOU CAN MAKE IT ♪
♪ ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ WHEN THIS WORLD TURNS ITS BACK ON YOU ♪
♪ HANG IN, AND DO THAT SWEET THING YOU DO ♪
♪ YOU JUST ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ HEY, HEY ♪
♪ YOU JUST ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ COME ON, AND JUST ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ YOU AND ME ♪
♪ JUST ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ HEY, HEY ♪
♪ YOU JUST ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ YOU AND ME ♪
♪ JUST ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ HANG ON, AND JUST ROLL WITH IT, BABY ♪
♪ HEY ♪
♪ COME ON ♪
♪ ROLL WITH ME, BABY ♪
♪ HANG ON, BABY ♪
♪ ROLL ON ♪
♪ ROLL WITH ME, BABY ♪
♪ ROLL ♪
♪ HEY ♪
♪ COME ON, NOW ROLL ♪
♪ ROLL ON, BABY ♪
♪ ROLL ON ♪
CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY 20th CENTURY FOX
CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE --www.ncicap.org--