Mostly when I'm walking
at night
or anywhere by myself,
if I'm frightened or...
Then he'll turn up.
He'll talk about what I'm doing, you know, some advice.
He'll say,
"Don't be frightened. I've told you,"
"walk in the middle of the road at night."
And I do,
I move over to the middle of the road.
Or, I don't know, he'll say, er...
"It's a disgrace. This street is a disgrace."
"There's no proper lighting. Have you written? You must write."
He's always forthright.
I mean, he always was forthright, so I suppose that's not...
But you know, he'll also speak in Spanish to me.
Which is odd because he couldn't speak Spanish.
And I would have been feeling low, you know, very alone
and hopeless and then he's there, his presence.
And it's okay. It's fine.
And he tells me he loves me.
And then he's not there any more.
And then, how do you feel?
Okay. Fine. Well, I feel looked after, I suppose.
Watched over.
See he never says anything profound or Earth-shattering.
You know, he doesn't say, "Well, God thinks this or..."
Or about the planet or world events or
"There is no God."
It's all, "Go to bed."
"Brush your teeth." Or, the way I'm brushing my teeth because, er,
I always brush them side to side and I'll be doing that, and he'll say,
"Down at the top, come on. Down at the top, up from the bottom,"
or, "Lock the back door."
What's that?
"Lock the back door."
Is it significant, do you think,
he says that in Spanish?
No.
I did. It's locked.
How long ago did Jamie die?
Nina?
Jamie. When was it, he died?
- Good night, bye. - You're off, darling? Bye.
- Bye. See you tomorrow. - Good night.
Good night, Sandy.
Bye, Carolyn.
- Bye. - Bye-bye, love.
I like your hair.
- What? - Your hair, it looks, er...
You know, is, is it different?
Or is it the earrings? Yeah, they're terrific.
They look sort of... are they sort of Inca?
Sandy, what are you talking about?
- Are you depressed? - No.
I don't just love you because you translate my postcards, you know.
I know.
You see, everybody's just a wee bit concerned about you.
"Everybody" who?
'Cause you've disappeared. You've gone to ground.
You don't come out to play any more. You don't invite people round.
- You look terrible. - Except for my hair!
Well, actually, you know, you're hair, well, your hair
was never your strong point.
So, is it still Jamie?
- What? What? - I can understand that.
The Lord knows I miss Gabriella and I hated her and I still miss her,
I understand that.
You know, you've got to get out. Unless you get yourself out
- you will never meet anybody. - Okay.
- Okay, darling, thanks. - So, come on. Come.
Come on, have a wee drink with your Uncle Sandy.
Sandy, I can't.
I can't.
I just can't.
Hi.
Everything okay?
Good. Very safe now.
Yeah, I'm really much happier with the door, yeah.
- Take ten man to break down this door. - Titus.
- It's nearly midnight. - Yes.
I come to see if you still want me in the morning.
Yes, I do, actually, please.
Yeah, I can't close any of my kitchen cabinets.
And, Titus, listen, I've got rats.
I've either got two massive rats who never stop eating
or about 2,000 on a calorie-controlled diet.
I had this man who came this morning
and he put down enough poison to knock out half of North London
and it's disappearing. Look.
I'm missing Poland.
- Right. - Sometimes I think I hate Poland.
But then the song goes through my head, some music or a taste.
I remember taste of Polish bread.
A man should never drink.
He remembers all his country, his mother, his lovers.
Yeah, I'm going to bed.
I'm bushed. I've had a really, it's been a really busy day.
Nina,
you're the only beautiful woman I meet in London.
Absolutely right.
That's got nothing to do with the drink.
I am the only beautiful woman in London.
Night, night.
See you in the morning.
In my country,
when want to be rid of rats,
you do not use poison. We dance.
To drive the rats away we, we dance.
I would be surprise
if the rats will come back.
My God.
Sorry. Sorry, is Nina around?
- Yeah. Through there. - Thanks.
- Nina! - Sandy.
What's going on?
Well, the fridge is still working. That's what I keep telling myself.
The fish fingers are frozen.
Nina, this flat, it's not been very, er...
Really, has it? Who's the chappie in the joists?
That's Keith. He's the plumber.
Well, he's not a proper plumber. Little problem with the water.
Titus here is trying to make the kitchen doors
fit the kitchen cabinets. Did you meet Titus?
Titus!
This is Sandy. Sandy runs the agency.
- Hello, Titus. Good work. - Hello.
George is here somewhere. George!
No, it's a disaster, really. The whole place is falling to bits.
Why did I buy it, Sandy? You told me.
Jamie told me. Everybody told me.
Nina, this is very important. Hello.
- George, this is Sandy. He's my boss. - Hello, George.
- Have you touched these containers? - No.
- Haven't emptied them out or anything? - No.
We've got a very serious problem here, Nina.
We're talking a lot of rodents. We're talking infestation.
We might even be talking nesting. Can I make a telephone call?
Are we talking mice?
No.
- Rat... My God. - I have to move out.
- Sandy, you want borscht? - Sorry?
Borscht. Have some. Titus says it's the answer to all our problems.
Borscht! Yeah! Thanks. Yes.
Nina, a little postcard from Charlie here somewhere.
Could you spare a few minutes?
- Sandy, you've got to learn Spanish. - I know.
It's so perverse to run a language agency and speak...
How many languages do you speak, and not be, I mean, it's your son!
You must be able to understand what he's saying to you!
- I know. I know. - I mean, in the end,
that was the problem with you and Gabriella.
- You couldn't say a thing to each other. - No, that was our strength.
It was when we started to communicate it went wrong.
Before that, it was terrific. It was sign language.
It was great. It was... Voilà!
You're a twerp. What is this?
This is, er, it's work. It's for you.
It's urgent. It's manuals and whatever. You know. But, Nina, the postcard,
could you just read the postcard,
because I'm beginning to have an anxiety attack.
- "Dear Daddy..." - Where does it say that?
- There. - Fantastic.
"We are spending our holidays in Mar Del Plata."
It's lovely. It's supposed to be beautiful.
"I'm swimming in the sea. And I... And I'm not wearing..."
what do you call them?
"I'm not wearing..."
- Things. - Trunks?
Floats.
"Mario is teaching me to swim
- "underwater." - Bastard!
"We are staying in a very big hotel which has a television and a bathroom."
That's the thing about Gabriella.
A television and a bathroom. Doesn't that make
you laugh? Doesn't that make you want to spew after all that stuff about
materialism, you give her a television and a bathroom.
Yeah. "Last night, we went to a football match, and then we had a barbecue"
- "which gave me diarrhoea." - That is terrible.
Because Mario is a bastard, that is beyond dispute!
He's absolutely, manifestly, a bastard.
As in loco parentis. What is he doing? He's poisoning my son!
"I'm having a great time. Wish you were here."
"Lots of love, Charlie."
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's having a great time.
I have to write back, Nina. Would you help me write back?
Okay. Sandy, if you promise me you'll make an effort to learn Spanish.
Sí, sí, señora sí, sí. Thank you, thank you. Gracias, gracias.
You're a good person.
Have soup.
It's fantastic.
- It's fantastic. - Fantastic.
I tell her last night,
Nina, she is beautiful woman.
She is beautiful.
- You are. - Okay.
Well, I think she's beautiful.
Who's this who's beautiful?
We're talking about Nina.
Yeah, she is.
Guys, what is this?
She really loved him.
It's tragic.
And he was young, you know. He was younger than me.
It's cruel, this house.
He had a sore throat.
One minute he has a sore throat,
then he's having an examination. The next moment he stops breathing.
The anaesthetist couldn't get the tube down.
If he'd just had a wee suck at a Strepsil it would never have happened.
I think she loves me.
I know she doesn't know yet, but...
Do you like washing?
Yeah. I like getting my hands in the warm water.
- I like drying. - Also me.
Me, too.
Look at this water, it's brown.
It's a miracle there's any water.
This a terrible flat.
Or I find that I've
just been sitting with my head in my hands.
And an hour has gone by, or longer, like this.
And I'm completely numb.
And the
kettle could be boiling away or the...
Telephone.
And I'm crying, I'm crying, I mean I can be on the Tube and somebody says,
"What's the matter?" And there are tears. It's ridiculous.
I miss him. I just miss him. I miss him. I miss him.
I miss him. I know I shouldn't do this.
I mean, I,
I'm in the sitting room and I think, "There's no point going to bed"
"'cause he's not there."
Or I'm in bed and I think there's no point getting up!
It's anger, isn't it? It's rage. It's rage!
I get so angry with other people.
People in love, or out of love, or wasting love.
And women with children.
Growing children, fertile.
But most of all, I'm so angry with him!
I'm so angry with him.
I can't forgive him for not being here. I can't!
God!
God. I've run over, haven't I? Sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm fine, actually.
I am fine.
God, I'm late. Er, listen,
I'll see you next Tuesday.
Thanks.
Can I?
Bye.
- We'll walk. - We do walk.
We looking at things.
Are looking.
- Say it. - Are looking at things.
Are looking at things. Yeah.
So, what things can we see?
We can see
- trees? - Good. We can see trees, yeah.
And, er, people.
Good, we can see some people.
Er, we can see some people.
Can see cielo.
Er, cielo?
No me digas.
- Sky? - Sky! Very good.
We can see sky and then...
Nubes?
- Nubes? - Clouds.
Clode.
- Clouds. - Clouds.
- Yeah. That's right, Maura. - Yeah?
We can see the clouds and the sky.
What are you doing?
It's no problem.
We can gossip while we're cleaning.
Claire.
I've had plumbers who are coming back. Carpenters,
rat-catchers, and apparently now
there's subsidence in one of the supporting walls.
Being house-proud gets a touch difficult.
Vacuuming won't hurt.
Leave me alone. I like cleaning!
- Just like ma. - I'm not. Shut up.
You've always liked messing. I've always liked cleaning.
Wish you'd let me help you more.
I could always pop round and...
No, thanks.
Harry, what are you doing?
That's rat poison. Harry! Harry, that's poison.
God!
Did you eat any of this stuff?
God, what's that in your mouth?
- Spit it out! Spit it out! - It's chocolate. It's okay.
The poison is purple.
God. It's my fault.
God, just sit down.
Just sit down for God's sake and try not to...
Impossible!
But you love him.
I love him but he's impossible.
I don't always love him.
Just try not to poison yourself for five minutes.
Tsk. Nina...
How can you have rats?
It's a personality defect.
I'm serious.
Have you spoken to them, Claire?
I've tried but they won't answer.
"What are you doing here?"
Nothing.
There is an odour, I have to say. There is a strange odour.
Even Harry noticed.
Yeah, well, the rats are dying, Claire.
That's basically the problem on the smell front.
I wish you'd come and stay with us.
You could have people in and have it all done properly.
Or sell it.
I can't bear to think of you living here all on your own.
I'm fine.
It's not as if Jamie ever lived here.
It's got nothing to do with Jamie.
How's Nick?
Yes, he's busy.
Do you know about Everest?
Dad's going to climb Mount Everest.
You're joking?
- When? - Well, after Christmas, sometime.
When's the baby due?
No, no. The baby'll be two or three months by then.
It's fine, it's fine.
He probably won't go. He's hopeless with babies, anyway, so...
I can't sell the flat. Nobody's buying even nice flats.
It's only a lunatic would. Anyway,
I like it.
- I like it. - Exactly, Harry likes it.
- It's big. - Yeah. God.
So are you.
What's the verdict on a new baby?
I don't mind.
You're looking fab.
- How's school? - He's worried because he doesn't think
there'll be room in our bed for four.
Of course, there will. Shove, that's the secret.
Tactical use of the elbow.
He's doing brilliantly at school. He loves it.
You're not getting posh?
No.
Good.
Say "Bum" and "Trotsky" twice a day before meals.
Harry, don't.
Have you told Nina about your lessons?
He's having cello lessons.
Really?
Isn't that great.
- Are you going to ask Nina? - You ask her.
What's this?
Well, Harry was wondering,
erm, he's having these lessons and, erm,
at some point, well, the school provides boys with an instrument,
until you decide whether or not it's serious, whether or not
the boy's going to persevere.
But then, obviously, eventually, he'll need his own cello.
Yeah, so what are you getting at?
Well, obviously, say if this is a bad idea,
but, erm, we did wonder,
we were wondering whether Jamie's cello is...
Is that a terrible idea?
You don't play it and perhaps...
You want me to give you Jamie's cello?
No, not give, no. Er...
Either for Harry to borrow it or we could buy it or...
Have you any idea
how much that cello's worth?
Well, I know it's a good one, of course.
I can't believe you'd be so insensitive.
It's practically all I've got of him.
'Tis him.
Like asking me to give you his body.
Nina, it isn't.
Well, anyway, you can't have it.
Okay, I'm sorry.
You're right, it was a stupid thing to...
You should never have asked.
It's so horrible.
I had no idea you'd react so, Nina.
Nina.
I kept thinking,
"Just my luck."
Die of a sore throat.
But dying...
- Actually dying. What's it like? - Dying's all right.
It was the general anaesthetic I didn't like.
No.
- I'm serious. - So am I.
I don't know.
Maybe I didn't die properly and maybe that's why I can come back.
You know...
It was like standing behind a glass wall
while everybody else got on with missing me.
It didn't hurt,
you know,
I'm very sensitive to pain.
It really didn't hurt.
But where do you go?
I mean,
do you go to heaven or what?
I don't think so.
I can't take all this in.
Where do I start?
Are you here? You are here.
Look, I'm here.
Are you staying?
Well, I think so.
I'd like to. Is that all right?
It's fantastic.
Can I kiss you?
Yeah.
Your lips are a bit cold.
Actually, I'm fantastically cold.
It's something I've really noticed. This flat is freezing.
Well, the heating's on. It's supposed to be on, anyway.
I've got to tell you,
this is a terrible flat.
- I know. - Terrible.
Honestly, Nina, you're hopeless.
And something else is really bothering me, too.
You've got red bills. Red gas, red phone, it's not clever.
I know.
And you never lock the back doors.
Driving me crazy.
I'm going. I'm going.
Thank you for missing me.
I have. I do.
I did.
I know.
But the pain, your pain,
I couldn't bear that.
There's a little girl,
I see this little girl from time to time,
Alice, who's three.
Three-and-a-half. And she's great. Everybody loves her
and makes a big fuss. But she isn't spoilt. Well, she wasn't spoilt.
And she was knocked over
and she died.
And her parents and her family and her friends from kindergarten...
Well, she used to go to this park.
And she was telling me, she...
They made an area in the park.
Gave them money for swings and little wooden animals.
And there are these plaques on each of the, on the sides of the swing,
bottom of the horse,
"From Alice's mum and dad."
"In loving memory of Alice who used to play here."
Er, and of course, Alice goes back there all the time.
And when you see parents
take their child off the swing,
and see the sign.
And then they hold onto their son and daughter so tightly.
Clinging on for dear life.
And yet, the capacity to love that people have.
What happens to it?
I don't know.
I blame the government.
- What? - The government.
What's the government got to do with anything?
I hate the bastards.
You've died and you're still into party politics?
I still attend meetings.
God.
Which is more than can be said for some people.
That's my doorbell.
It's a bit late, isn't it? Are you expecting somebody?
No.
Well, I'll make myself scarce.
I make decision.
We go to Paris.
Make love for one week.
Titus.
You're fab, you're so sweet.
Titus, I can't go to Paris with you. Dear.
Why? You don't like Paris?
You don't want to make love?
For a week? No. No, no, I love Paris.
No, it's got nothing to do with your offer which is very kind.
No, er...
Which is more than kind. It's lovely.
It's just I'm not really looking for a lover to be...
It's not you. I'd say the same to anybody.
- Can I come in? - No.
- Just for talk. - No.
Really, it's too late.
Now I'm depressed.
I'm sorry.
I booked tickets. I...
I'm man with big emotion.
Big heart.
I know, Titus.
Thank you.
Well...
I love you.
You follow?
I follow.
Jamie?
Jamie, please, where are you?
Jamie?
Jamie, please. Come back.
Who was that?
Is this going to be your party trick?
Sounded like a man's voice.
Titus.
It was Titus. Don't worry.
He's Polish.
A bit late to come round.
That's what I told him.
So,
what,
is he in love with you?
I don't think so, no.
Darling.
What are you doing?
Warming my lips.
♪ Your mother ♪
You think every cloud looks like my mother.
This one really does look like your mother. Look, eyes,
nose, eyebrows.
- Brilliant. - My mother has not got a beard.
Well, I see that as a sort of a,
erm...
Ruffle.
♪ You are in my blood like
♪ Holy wine
- ♪ You taste so bitter - ♪ Taste so bitter
- ♪ And sweet - ♪ And so sweet and I
♪ Could drink
♪ A case of you
♪ Darling
- ♪ And I would still be on my feet - ♪ Still be on my feet
♪ I would still be on
♪ My feet ♪
I love you.
I really love you.
I really, truly love you.
I really, truly, madly love you.
I really, truly, madly, deeply love you.
I really, truly, madly, deeply, passionately love you.
I really, truly, madly, deeply, passionately, remarkably love you.
I really, truly, madly, deeply, passionately, remarkably, erm...
Erm, erm, erm, erm, erm.
Erm, erm, erm, erm, deliciously love you.
I really, truly,
madly, passionately, remarkably, deliciously, juicily, love you.
Deeply! Deeply!
You passed on "deeply" which was your word,
which means that you couldn't have meant it.
So you're a fraud, actually...
You're probably a figment of my imagination.
"Juicily?"
Your forfeit. Erm, erm...
You play, I dance.
♪ Loneliness
♪ Is the coat you wear
♪ Jamie, baby
♪ A deep shade of blue
♪ Is always there
♪ Jamie
- ♪ The sun ain't gonna shine any more - ♪ Jamie
- ♪ The moon ain't gonna rise in the sky - ♪ Jamie, baby
♪ The tears are always clouding
♪ Your eyes
♪ When you're without love
♪ Baby
♪ Emptiness
♪ Is the place you're in
♪ Jamie, baby
♪ There's no more to lose
♪ And no more to win
♪ The sun ain't gonna shine any more
♪ The moon ain't gonna rise in the sky
♪ The tears are always clouding your eyes
♪ When you're without love
- I'll go. - No. No.
It's Claire.
She wanted my cello, didn't she?
Bloody cheek.
I want the world to go away.
Well, I don't know about the world, but I guarantee the rats have gone away.
- How? - Terrified of ghosts.
- Really? - Really.
And now your sister's gone away, too.
♪ Early one morning the sun was rising
♪ I was layin' in bed
♪ Wonderin' if she'd changed at all
- ♪ If her hair was still red ♪ - Go away.
♪ The weatherman says fine today
♪ There's not a cloud to come my way but it's raining
♪ Raining in my heart ♪
Get away.
God.
You pig.
- I'm ill. - You're not ill.
- I'm sick. - You're not sick.
I am sick.
I've got tummy ache.
I'm probably dying.
That'll be the next thing. I'll die as well.
And...
Sorry.
Sorry. I can't believe I said that.
Wondering whether you were going to work today?
No.
- Okay. - I can't believe I just said that.
Don't worry.
You should call in, so they know you're dying. They might be concerned.
Nina.
This is Sandy.
Are you hibernating? Where are you?
Do you think I should go in?
Aren't you boiling...
No, I'm freezing. I've been trying to fix your central heating.
Who put it in. It's unbelievable. What goes wrong with things?
That guy, what's his name? He did the shower at Coniston Road.
It's working perfectly. It must be 90 degrees in here.
That's probably why I've got tummy ache. I've probably got tropical disease.
I've probably got malaria. I can't go into work with malaria.
Anyway, what would you do if I went into work?
Me! Don't worry about me. There's time to do a lot of things.
- I've been having Spanish lessons... - Spanish?
I knew. I knew you had.
Yeah, because when you were, erm...
You know, when I could sense you,
feel you around and you were telling me to do things.
You know, like, lock the back door and stuff.
You'd say it in Spanish.
And I was so, I was really...
I was really touched.
The accent's not great. But...
No! Jamie!
Jamie!
So I'm going in, am I?
Jamie?
What have you...
- What... - Well, I just,
just changed a few things around.
Cleared up a bit.
Where's my tiger?
I could put it back.
- No, no, it's... - You know I've got more sense
with those things. You could never hang a picture.
Look, could I light the fire?
And
I gave you this.
I think I will have to go in, actually. I can...
I can feel my face is hot.
Well, I got to be careful because you know I'm prone to colds.
Can you imagine, if I get a cold now, it could last forever.
I'm not joking. I'm serious.
Thank you.
What for?
Coming back.
- Nina! - I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Maura! Hello. No.
My God, is it Thursday?
It's Friday, Nina. Where have you been?
Titus. Hello.
- Hello. - Maura. Has she been...
Have you been here since yesterday?
No, no.
- She's doing some cleaning. - What do you mean?
She's cleaning. We need someone. She needs the money.
Sandy! She's about to have a baby.
Excuse me, excuse me, can we just start all this again, please?
You disappeared off the planet for a week.
We have been working. You come back,
- we get told off. Sorry about this. - Comment?
- I'll be with you in a moment. - Comment?
God, is it really Friday?
My God.
And apart from anything else, Gabriella called me.
And she was yelling and screaming and being hysterical,
and what else is new, I know. But lucky for me, Maura was here.
- How did that help? - 'Cause Gabriella spoke to her,
so Maura can speak to you, then you can speak to me.
What about Titus? Do we get all the ex-clients to come work here or what?
Monsieur?
So, come on. Let's have an explanation?
Make something up.
And why have you got the nerve to look so cheerful?
That's a really tricky one, Sandy.
Yes, I had a feeling it might be.
- Do you love me? - Nope.
No, I mean, as a friend.
- Nope. - Sandy, you do love me as a friend?
No, I do not.
And you better ring Rachel Reed.
Did she say what it was?
No, no, you're too late because she rang on Monday.
The 14-day timer, the...
Sandy, psst.
I can tell you're forgiving me.
Hi. You okay?
I come tonight. Finish your cabinets.
Erm, well, tonight,
tonight's not very good.
Okay. I come tomorrow.
Well, could we talk about that tomorrow?
- I'll telephone you, Titus. - Sure.
It's not that I don't want you to finish the, erm...
I've got some people staying at the moment... Friends.
And they turned up unexpectedly.
Okay.
- How's the baby? - Good.
Very fine.
Very fine's not, er...
We don't say "Very fine."
But I like it.
What should I say?
Very fine's fine.
English, Maura.
- No, I can't. - Yes, you can.
Erm, Sandy, Titus.
Very sad for you.
Why are they very sad for me?
Because her man is dead.
Your man. My man.
Yes.
- Well, I also sad. - Maura?
Do you believe in life after death?
You made a documentary?
English. English.
I make film.
Many film. In Chile.
In Chile, I make film. In London, I'm a cleaner.
The spirits are everywhere.
They are walking here with us.
Yes.
- I was working here before. - Did you?
It's lovely.
Roberto, this is my friend, Nina.
Nina, this is Roberto.
- Hi, hello. - I'm very pleased to meet you.
- Maura told us you help her. - Well.
- Cafe? - Cafe.
- Yup. - Coffee's great. Thanks.
- Is Roberto from Chile? - No, from El Salvador.
He's a very good friend.
Maura.
You never told me who's the father of your baby. Is it Roberto?
Roberto!
No.
I think it's this Welshman I met at Glastonbury Festival.
I don't know.
I tried to find him.
No problem. I want the baby.
Here we are.
Okay.
What's this? What's going on?
Roberto's my doctor.
I don't like hospitals.
I am a doctor. Was a doctor in my country.
But I keep telling her, she must go to the hospital.
- She never listens to me. - No, no.
I have the same problem, Roberto.
- Roberto! - Shit, the boss.
- Roberto. - I'm coming.
What's going on here?
Nothing. I'm just coming.
I might have known you'd be involved. Have you paid for those?
- We haven't had the bill yet. - Sure.
- Sorry? - Pull the other leg.
What?
I've been looking at the till rolls,
I've been looking at the bills and counting the customers,
and what do you know, they don't add up!
I try to give you people a break.
It's a fact you're not meant to be working,
and I don't ask any questions
and what happens, I get diddled right under my nose.
- I'm sorry. You speak too quickly. - I bet I do.
Okay. I'll say it in words of one syllable.
You people have been ripping me off.
Stealing my money. Stitching me up. Robbing me.
- Comprenez? - No!
Does anybody speak the Queen's English here?
I can and this man says you've been cheating him and the other employees.
I bloody well have not.
What's he saying? I'm not bloody cheating anybody.
Shut up a minute. Okay, he says that you promised to them all four pounds
an hour, which is pretty criminal, incidentally, but in fact,
- you only pay them three? - They're not paying tax!
They come over here, they sponge off... I'm paying tax!
I'd be very interested to know their legal position.
So what they're doing, is they're paying themselves
the extra pound which is their money in the first place...
I heard that!
Calling me a bastard! Don't think I don't know what you're saying.
Hey, come on, watch it!
There's nothing up my left sleeve. Nothing up my right sleeve.
Nothing on my plate, except gravy.
Yum.
I take the novel, Russian. It must always be a Russian novel.
And I throw it in the air.
Any chance of another coffee?
Would you like a lift?
Erm, no, I think we're fine, thanks, aren't we?
Thank you for your performance back there, it was pretty extraordinary.
Anything to help.
Is that your profession?
Magic? Er, no.
No, no, it's not. It's, er...
What?
Nothing. It's okay.
Bye.
Right. Bye.
A very fine person.
I've been calling and calling.
George, hello.
Is that answer phone machine of yours working?
- I thought I'd better come around. - Dear. Have you been waiting?
I was getting a bit worried about you.
I'm fine.
Still bad in there, is it?
- What? - In the flat?
George, George.
George, you're never going to believe this.
They've gone.
Yes, well of course, they won't have gone. But, good, good.
No, no, they've definitely gone. It's amazing.
Nina, ask me how many years I've been in pest-control and shall I tell you?
Like all wars, you develop a healthy respect for the enemy.
Never underestimate them.
They lie low.
Jamie.
No, it's quite astonishing. They lie low.
They won't touch the trays,
so I clear off
and then they come back.
They're not stupid.
No. No.
- No. - Jamie.
Jamie, Jamie, Jamie, Jamie. Jamie.
Your trays are untouched.
You know, I think
they talk to each other.
Jamie.
- You've had a tidy-up? - Yeah.
Well, it needed it.
He's got a soft spot for you, you know.
- Who? - Titus.
I've always been rather fond of the Poles, myself.
Shall I make you a cup of tea?
Lovely.
Is it me or is it very hot in here?
That's me. I'm off.
All right, George. Thanks for coming.
And, sorry, if I was a bit unwelcoming.
You're a lovely girl.
I was telling my wife all about you.
Really?
George, I'm sorry. I thought your wife had died.
1978.
Still talk to her, though.
Tell her my day.
Don't you do that?
I do. Yes.
And death shall have no dominion.
We know that, you and me?
- God! - Hi.
Don't do that. You scared me half to...
- Don't do that. - Is this a bad time?
Yes. It's a terrible time, Jamie. There are some things that...
Come on. Don't be coy.
- I'm serious. Go away. - Darling.
I know you shave your legs.
God, I can't even lock the door on you any more.
- So you aren't pleased to see me? - No, I'm not.
Yes.
I am pleased to see you, but just leave me alone for a bit.
Of course, I'm pleased to see you.
I was terrified you'd gone.
- See you later. - Yeah.
Why do you lock this?
I don't know.
Have you turned the telly on?
Yes, erm...
Listen, sweetheart, don't get...
But some of the guys wanted to come back and...
Just watch a couple of videos.
- What guys? - Friends.
Some friends.
Dead friends?
I don't know. I suppose so, yes.
You telling me there are dead people in my living room watching videos?
Well, I mean...
Aren't these videos available wherever they are, normally?
Look, if it's a problem...
These are my friends, Nina.
No, okay, I'll send them away, sure.
No, it's fine, it's absolutely fine.
I'd forgotten you could be like this.
- Be like what? - Doesn't matter.
I said it's fine.
Bless you.
No.
I'll tell you what his name is, that is Eric Stuart Campbell.
He is the star of this film.
I'm telling you the lamppost bit is nonsense.
The greatest bit in this film is the fight with Eric Stuart Campbell
in the police station, right?
Charlie Chaplin is not even there. It is brilliant.
Eric, he died a few months after making this film.
He got run over. He told me. Where's the picture?
Just press one of those.
Nina.
This is Freddie.
And this is Pierre. This is Bruno.
- This is... - Isaac.
- Hello. - This is Nina.
- Hello. - I'm Bruno.
- Bruno. - Freddie, hi.
- Freddy. - Pierre.
- Pierre, hi. - Hello.
Hi.
- Well, can I get anybody anything? - No, thanks.
Well, the tape that says it's Manhattan.
It isn't.
No, you know, the other day, er...
I was trying to record
Hannah and Her Sisters...
- Lovely film. - Woody Allen.
Yes, and I got a terrible feeling that I'm so hopeless with that machine.
You haven't recorded over it, Nina!
She did that with Strangers on a Train.
- Really! - I love that film.
He's wonderful in that.
- Who? - Robert Walker.
That's such a drag.
Sorry.
Nora...
Yes, dear?
Whatever your dream was,
it wasn't a very happy one, was it?
No.
Is there anything I can do to help?
Yes, Fred, you always help.
- You've been a long way away. - "A long way away."
- Thank you for coming back to me. - "Coming back to me."
Okay, Five Easy Pieces or Fitzcarraldo?
- Fitzcarraldo - Five Easy Pieces.
Guys, actually, I'm going to have to go to bed.
Sorry.
- Night, night. - I'll be in in a minute.
Don't be long.
- Five Easy Pieces. - Fitzcarraldo.
Let's take a vote.
God.
You smell so nice.
Were you asleep?
Nina.
We've still got that hot water bottle?
Jamie, the thing is, I'm so hot.
- I'm suffocating. I'm too hot. - Don't worry. Don't worry.
Shush, shush, shush, I love you. Go back to sleep.
The guys are nice, aren't they?
Great guys.
Well done, Maureen.
- All right, Mand? - Yes, I'm all right.
Excuse me.
- Hi. - Hello.
- How are you? - I'm fine.
Er, this is Anthony and Anthony, this is my friend...
- Nina. - Nina.
- Hello, Nina. - Hello.
We're going for a walk, and we're going to do some paintings
and then, we're going to have a picnic.
Do you want to come?
Well, I think Nina's probably busy.
Well, I'd like to. I'd love to, but I've got an appointment.
I'm, I'm late.
Well, er, nice to see you.
To see you nice.
How's your friend, by the way? The one who's having the baby.
Maura, she's fine. Fine.
No, don't disappear, Helen! Adrian, just...
I, I'd better go.
Okay. Bye.
Nina! Nina!
I'm sorry, er...
Look, I was wondering, do you think maybe sometime we could...
Er, this is, this is probably a terrible, you can say "no"...
Yes, I'd like to.
- Really? - Yes.
- Well, can I call you? - Yes. No, I'll call you.
- Okay. - No, no, I will call you.
It's just, erm, I haven't got a pen, have you got a pen?
Yeah, well, I think so.
Sorry, have you got a pen?
- It's okay, it's okay. - I haven't got any paper.
- Have you got... - Here, write on that.
Okay, it's er, 2-6-1
0-8-4-0 and my work number is
2-6-7...
I can't remember.
That's, that's fine.
- Bye. - Bye.
Bye, bye, Nina.
Bye...
I was reading, erm...
I was reading, er, must have been one of those books that you lent me
on, about bereavement.
And,
er, it was about how it was possible
that some people might
get this powerful sensation
that their loved one has come back.
I don't mean like a sense of their presence,
you know, an abstract thing, I mean you know, that they've actually
come back.
And are in their house.
Well, what do you think about that? Do you think that's ridiculous?
What?
Is what ridiculous?
Well, I don't know. I mean, er...
Well, when I read it, I thought, "How ridiculous."
- I mean... - Why?
Well, no, I can imagine it. I can imagine going home this evening,
and there's Jamie.
- And he's back. - All right.
But, then...
But then what?
What are you saying is ridiculous?
Well, er...
I don't know. I don't know.
Everything, everything, everything.
I mean...
I don't know.
Sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, God. I'm so sorry.
Madame.
- Sorry. - They're glorious.
Thanks.
Scent. I love it. Listen, I know it's ridiculous, it's started...
It doesn't matter. We can do something else.
No, I can't.
- Why? Has something happened? - I can't.
I've got to be somewhere else. It's very complicated.
- Okay. - No, no, it's complicated, but,
I guarantee that whatever you're thinking is not why it's complicated.
Truly.
All right.
What am I going to tell my group?
They're on tenterhooks.
Is that...
- Are they your work or... - Yeah, we were drawing trees.
You know, you draw a tree and then, er,
on the roots and the branches, you put in the names of,
sorry, have you got time for this?
- Yes, yes, sure. - Okay, look, let's...
You draw a tree.
Okay, and then, on the roots,
you put in the names of people who were important in forming you,
or stabilising you, or taking care of you. Mum, dad, sister, whoever.
And then, you put in the names of people who are around you now.
This is on the branches, like leaves.
Sorry, are you with me?
- Yes, I think so. - Well,
a bit ambitious, really, but, I did.
I was doing mine, and Anthony, who you met, he suddenly said,
"Well, where's Nina?"
Actually, it's, erm,
it's not just the group that's on tenterhooks, but, er...
- Anyway, can I give you a lift? - No, really, I'll be fine.
Well, er, aren't we both going north, I could just drop you off
- at the end of the road, it would be... - No, I'll get a bus.
Really, I think it's better. Well, you could walk me to the Underground,
if you want?
Well, this is my shortest ever date. Yours?
- Yes. - That's something, then.
Are you interested in my last name, what, no, no, no, hang on, hang on,
- stop. - What?
Okay, okay, look, this is what we do.
I tell you everything about my life,
between here and that statue there, do you see it?
And then you tell me yours.
Okay? And we hop, of course.
No lies from the speaker. No interruptions. No questions
from the listener. And we're off.
Mark Damian De Grunwald.
32 next birthday. Born, Budleigh, Salterton.
Er, Capricorn. I don't believe in star signs, I mean.
Parents alive. Retired.
Er, father, silent. Practically completely silent.
Eighteen years older than my mother who is not completely silent.
Owned a mill, then a post office, then a tea-shop.
Amateur magician, father, that is. And I was his assistant,
at conservative club dinner dances.
Regularly sawed in half from the age of seven.
And made to disappear in ideologically unsound circumstances.
Er, change legs. What else?
Home, okay. Puberty, okay.
Parents, okay. One older brother, okay.
Academically, okay. Erm...
Vaguely asthmatic. Attempted suicide at the age of 17.
I can't remember why. I was sad about something.
Aspirin, stomach pump, followed by weekly sessions
with educational psychologist,
for whom I developed an enormous passion,
and encouraged me to become a psychologist myself.
A-Levels, psychology degree at Sussex University,
er, trained in Art Therapy, what is Art Therapy?
You draw trees. Have one daughter, Gemma seven, no, that should come earlier,
erm, lived with Gemma's mother for three weeks before she left me
for theology student. I've stopped believing in God.
But long enough with me to get pregnant.
Gemma is seven, have I said that already?
Erm, and her hair is curly.
And, er, she has bright sparks, red ones, you know, in the sun.
And, er, she calls me Mark De Grunwald and the vicar she calls "Daddy."
And, erm, I love basically everything, music, curry, I can practically recite
the complete works of Er, and er, and I live alone and my fridge is empty
and I can do my own washing and I'm very interested in Nina,
I can do magic, and now, you go!
- Just talk about you. Don't think, go. - No, I can't.
- Yes. - Erm, Nina Mitchell...
You've gotta hop, you've gotta hop.
God. Nina Mitchell, I can't believe I'm doing this.
Also Capricorn, but also don't believe, so I can't make anything of that.
I think there may be a God. Interpreter, I'm starting at the end.
I believe in protesting, in the possibility of change,
and making this planet more decent.
I hate what this country's doing to itself and to the people.
No, you see it all the time, the way we treat other races and visitors.
It happens every day. Help.
You know, but, I mean, you saw it in the cafe, you know, wrong skin,
wrong size, wrong shape, you're lost,
or wrong religion, wrong ideology. Wrong class. It makes me so...
Do you want me to be more personal?
Okay, parents alive, Gloucestershire,
teachers. Him, geography, her, history.
Holidays, it was Dad, "Where are we?" Mum, "Have we been here before?"
I have a sister, Claire, I love her, she has a family and a husband
I can't stand. He keeps climbing everything.
Climbs socially, in business, and now finally, has started climbing
mountains. Erm, they have a son, Harry.
She's pregnant again, for the second time.
Their son is my nephew and I adore him.
Did I say I was born in Stratford? Well, I was.
And do you know, I pay to do this once a week, to talk.
That's where I was going when I saw you.
To my woman, the Burge. Doctor Burge.
Only difference is that there you get 55 minutes and no exercise
and here, it seems to spill out.
And I, I play the piano. I love Bach.
I have rats. I'm in a mess.
I live alone. I haven't always, not always...
Hey, come on, Nina, you'e not hopping. Come on.
I love you. Don't stop.
- Where have you been? - Nowhere.
Nowhere. Work.
It's so late.
I know. Sorry.
I got worried.
Sorry.
Just like old times.
Is there something you want to tell me?
I have this feeling that you're with me. Are you with me all day?
No.
I think of you as being on my shoulder and, erm...
If you are, then you'll know that
I am like someone who carries their loved one on their shoulder.
If that was what you were asking.
I'm not, but thank you.
Where's the television?
And the video machine?
I put them in our bedroom.
People couldn't get comfortable.
It's so cold in the evenings. And anyway, I wanted to play
and don't worry,
they'll move when we want to go to bed.
- It's no problem. Don't get frazzled. - Please.
Nina, you can't come home in the middle of the night and then complain
because I've got company.
It's not the middle of the night.
I don't know these people. I don't...
I don't even know what period they're from. This is ridiculous.
Well, you could try talking to them.
I can't believe this is happening.
I've got ghosts watching videos in my bedroom.
And I'm being accused of what?
What am I being accused of?
Jamie, they're dead people.
The rats have gone and now I'm infested with ghosts.
There are eight or nine people in there.
They're not doing you any harm. If you want to go to bed,
they'll go. Just tell them.
You want me to go, just tell me.
And why are they all men?
I don't want you to go, darling. I don't want you to go.
I don't know what I want.
Anyway,
I bought you a hot-water bottle.
Do you want it?
Thanks.
It's great.
I mean,
why can't you just go back to heaven while I'm at work?
I don't know. It's like you make a choice and then you...
I don't know.
I'm here. It's fine. It's fine.
I love you.
Smooth.
Hi, Nina, I thought I heard you.
Did you remember to go to the, er...
Yes, er...
They didn't have I Vitelloni, but I got you...
Erm...
- Pinocchio and Forget Venice. - Fantastic.
Did you see that, Jamie? Forget Venice? Fantastic.
So tender.
And by the way, Isaac says you're in check, it's your move.
Looks bad.
I can't...
How can I be in check? Just a minute, sweetheart.
Sorry.
Thanks, Freddie. Hello?
Yeah.
God. Okay, yeah, of course.
Yeah, I'll come.
- Maura! - Nina!
Hello, I'm Maura's friend.
- Is she... How is she? - She's fine.
She's going into the delivery room in a minute.
Right.
She wants me to come with her, can I?
I don't see why not.
Is everything, everything...
Don't worry.
Listen, excuse me.
Have you talked to her about medication? Because, have you given her any drugs,
- or what? - She hasn't had anything yet.
She can have gas and air or pethidine or whatever she wants.
No, no, no, hang on.
Can I just check with her, because I don't think that's...
Yes, yes, yes, drugs. Give me drugs. Yes!
Well, she thinks she does at the moment, but I...
Hey, what's the matter?
- Titus? - Yeah.
Titus, yeah, she said that name several times. Is that the father?
He loves you? Does he?
- That's nice. - Okay, we can go in now.
Right.
Titus! Titus!
Breathe in really deeply and push.
Good, good, push.
Excellent. Push. Right now.
Okay, now the head's there.
The head's there.
One more push and it's going to come out.
Now I want you to pant. Are you listening to me?
That's okay. Pant. Pant.
Pant, pant.
Okay, the head's out.
The head's out. Okay.
We're almost there.
Hello, darling.
A new life.
What's going on?
Nina. Hi, hang on. Hang on.
So, tell me, was it a boy or a girl?
- Girl. - A girl! It was a girl!
Pierre! Pierre!
- What? - Maura had a little girl.
- Tremendous. - Was it moving?
Isn't birth moving?
Freddie, what's going on with the furniture?
It's going to be great.
Jamie took a look at the floor boards
and they're fabulous, they're beautiful. They're those Victorian boards.
We're just getting the carpet, even as we speak.
Hi.
Good work.
The only thing they need is a good scrub.
- It's oak. - It's definitely a hardwood.
- Oak or ash? - Jamie! What are you doing?
Aren't these boards amazing? Who would have thought
that under that disgusting carpet... You need to burn it, by the way.
It's full of mildew and silverfish, but these boards...
- So, it was a girl? - I liked that carpet.
Don't be perverse.
Well, I did like it and you can't just go around putting...
Treating my flat as...
Nina, the carpet was threadbare, is threadbare, and it's full of mould
and mildew and even you must admit that these boards are in a complete...
I feel like I'm being burgled! Every time I come home,
I feel like I'm being burgled!
God, the flat...
Chairs are moved, the pictures are different...
They're not where I...
And it is my flat, Jamie. It is my flat, I mean...
Look, er...
Do you want to have a row in public? I mean, it's actually
quite embarrassing for everybody, for me and...
No. No. I don't'! No, I don't want to be in public in my own home.
That's right, that's absolutely right. So, could your friends go, please?
Could everybody just go! Do you think?
Is it possible I could have some time in my... Now!
Now.
Please.
Is, is that asking too much?
Sorry.
Satisfied?
God.
It's only dust.
Nina, that was really humiliating.
You ask people to give you a hand they don't need to,
they lug your furniture around half the day
and then you come back and throw a tantrum.
That was really, really,
really humiliating.
Was it like this before?
- What? - Before?
Were we like this?
What? Like what?
Look,
you're tired. Your friend just had a baby.
You were up half the night. It's
traumatic, it's an emotional experience. Let's not turn it into...
Tell me about the first night we spent together?
Why?
Seriously? You want me to?
What did we do?
We talked.
What else?
Well, talking was the major component.
You played that piano.
And I played.
Then we both played.
Something, duet. Something, can't remember.
And then you danced for about three hours,
until I fell asleep.
But you were fantastic.
And then we had some corn flakes.
And when we kissed,
which was at about 11:00 the following morning,
we were trembling so much, we couldn't take off our clothes.
You see, I...
I held that baby, so...
It's life, it's a life I want.
And all my taste, all my things, after you died, I found stuff
in my trunk that I'd put there 'cause you disapproved,
or laughed at them, you know, books and photographs,
and things, and I couldn't, I didn't know how to
mend a fuse or
find a plumber or bleed a radiator, but now I do,
and it is a ridiculous flat, I know,
but I think I'll get there. It will be beautiful. It could be, I think.
And I, I so much longed for you.
I longed for you.
How's your Spanish?
What?
There's a poem I wanted you to translate.
I read it. There's a bit
that I wanted to tell you. That I wanted you to hear.
Okay.
Erm...
"Forgive me."
I know this poem.
"If you were not living..."
"If you, beloved, my love, If you have died..."
"All the leaves will fall on my breast..."
"It will rain on my soul all night, all day..."
"My feet will want to march to where you are sleeping..."
Your accent's terrible.
"My feet will want to march to where you are sleeping,"
"but I shall go on living."
- Do you want me to go? - No. Never, never, never.
Well?
I think so.
Yes.
Here comes the explorers on the train.
Right, everybody off the train.
- Now. - Out, in.
I like the train.
I think there's a lion.
Where's the lion?
Is it dangerous?
It gave you a scare. Is it dangerous?
I think so.
Yay.
We could always see a film.
- Okay. - Or, we could try the play again?
Okay.
Or, erm, we could just, erm,
we could just go home and eat, I mean...
- Anything, I... - Whatever.
Go ahead.
I'm so sorry, I'm gonna
cry, and it's not going to make any sense and...
I feel so... I'm so sorry.
I've, er...
I've sort of worked out that you're living with somebody else.
I mean, I'm not a private detective but, er...
You won't tell me where you live.
You won't give me your number.
- So... - No, I'm not.
I'm really not living with anybody.
Because I think if,
if you're not free...
Because to be quite honest, I'm in trouble here.
I'm...
I'm going to embarrass myself.
I think I am free.
I did love someone very much, you see.
Very much.
But he died.
He died.
And I found it
quite hard to get over it.
Well, why don't we just go home and
we could talk, I mean, you could tell me, whatever...
Er, anything, everything.
Just anything.
Okay. Yeah.
Could you stop? Could you stop?
- Sure. - Please, stop.
You all right?
Okay.
What was all that about?
It's not a threat.
Jamie.
Hi, its me.
- Hi. - Can you come and get me?
Er...
No, I can't. Sorry.
Okay.
Because, actually, I don't know where you live.
It's a bit of a problem.
Erm, it's
6A, Ellingham Road.
- Where's that? - N6.
- Yeah. - Highgate, okay.
Shall I come now, or what?
- Yeah. - I'm on my way.
Pack your toothbrush.
Okay.