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[THEME SONG PLAYING]
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Roz, who's our last caller?
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00:00:11,414 --> 00:00:14,543
On line two, we have Marilyn.
She's feeling a little homesick.
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00:00:14,627 --> 00:00:15,836
Go ahead, Marilyn.
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MARILYN: Well, I like living in Seattle.
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But I don't know,
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I grew up in this little town in
Wisconsin and I really miss that life.
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You're not the only one.
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00:00:24,765 --> 00:00:30,397
My producer Roz has regaled me with
many stories of the great Dairy State.
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You're from Wisconsin, Roz? What part?
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Bloomer.
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Oh, my God, I'm from Menomonie!
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-Oh, my God…
-ROZ: No way!
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You're from Menomonie.
My cousins are from Menomonie.
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-Do you know the Rayburns?
-Isn't that…
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MARILYN: Billy Rayburn is your cousin?
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I used to work with him
at Bell's Frozen Custard.
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Of course she did.
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Do you remember that guy
that used to run the store?
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The guy with all the moles?
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-Mr. Teechy?
-Mr. Teechy!
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Well, ladies, as fascinating as
this is, I'm afraid we're out of time.
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[MARILYN, ROZ SIGH]
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Well that's okay, Marilyn.
You can call back tomorrow.
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Be sure you all tune in
tomorrow for part two in our series
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"Women of the Cheese Belt."
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Goodbye for now and good mental health.
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These messages came for you earlier.
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-Your wine is ready.
-Oh, excellent!
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You know, I'm hosting a tasting tonight
for the wine club Niles and I belong to.
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I'm hoping they name
me the MAÎTRE de Chai.
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It's a longstanding dream of mine to
wear that silver cup around my neck.
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You know back in Wisconsin, if
a guy wore a cup around his neck,
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it'd mean he'd ticked off the gym teacher.
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Fine. Make sport but this does
happen to be important to me.
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Since when?
You used to say that club was nothing
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but a bunch of arrogant,
cork-sniffing snobs.
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Well that was before I got in.
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Well, when I'm handing out
40
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bologna sandwiches this
weekend at the homeless shelter,
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it will do my heart good to know that
a bunch of wealthy men are swishing
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two hundred dollar bottles of wine
and spitting it into silver buckets.
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Well, it's not like we
don't recycle the bottles.
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[THUNDER RUMBLING]
45
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There we are.
46
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Here's your six.
47
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Mm. Big, full-bodied, perhaps a bit baked.
48
00:02:31,017 --> 00:02:33,812
Essence of truffles, long finish.
49
00:02:33,896 --> 00:02:36,315
-Chambertin, seventy-six!
-Bravo, Frasier.
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If only your aim were as accurate as well.
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Oh.
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How is it those same taste
buds can't tell the difference
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00:02:43,784 --> 00:02:45,912
between me pot roast and me flank steak?
54
00:02:45,996 --> 00:02:47,538
Considering you learned
to cook in England,
55
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it's a wonder I can tell your flank
steak from a braised tennis ball.
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Now, now, let's move
on to the number seven.
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-All right.
-There you are.
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Ah. Touch of oak,
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a hint of currant, whisper of…
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What is that? What is that? Yes, wet dog!
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You guys still playing that stupid game?
62
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Dad, wine tasting is not a stupid game.
It's a highly refined skill.
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Yeah, I just saw a couple of guys on
the corner practicing out of paper bags.
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NILES: We're hardly winos.
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Some very distinguished
people belong to our club.
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The mayor, the
commissioner of Public Safety,
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the chief of surgery at Saint Luke's.
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Oh, just the people I'd want
walking around all liquored up.
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Couldn't you find room
for a school bus driver
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and a couple of air traffic controllers?
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Well, we could if they
had impeccable taste.
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Which reminds me,
Dad, I have a favor to beg.
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Would you mind if I moved your chair
into your room until after the tasting?
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Forget it. You might as well
ask me to stay in my room.
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Which takes care of the second favor.
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Oh, all right. Go ahead and move it.
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At least I don't have to
spend the night looking
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00:04:03,683 --> 00:04:05,483
at your society pals getting tanked.
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00:04:05,894 --> 00:04:07,687
All right, Niles, come on. Grab an end.
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[CHUCKLING]
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Oh, you're serious.
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-You know I don't lift.
-FRASIER: Yes.
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With that stick where it is,
I'm surprised you can bend.
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Start hoisting.
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Come on. All right.
86
00:04:23,417 --> 00:04:25,127
Oh, my God, Dad, this thing weighs a ton!
87
00:04:25,211 --> 00:04:26,045
Lord…
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-His room?
-All right, yes.
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-Oh, oh God.
-Oh, come on.
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-No, Niles, don't drop it! Don't…
-MARTIN: Hey!
91
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-You've gouged…
-You better be talking about the floor.
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00:04:34,932 --> 00:04:36,643
Oh, of course I'm not…
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00:04:36,727 --> 00:04:39,521
Oh, for Pete's sakes,
just a little scratch.
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00:04:39,605 --> 00:04:41,190
Get me a yellow magic marker,
95
00:04:41,274 --> 00:04:43,624
I'll color it in, nobody'll
know the difference.
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00:04:44,404 --> 00:04:47,908
Dad, you have no idea how critical these
people can be. They love finding fault.
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We could put a rug over it.
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A rug?
99
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Where a rug doesn't belong?
100
00:04:56,378 --> 00:05:00,428
Why don't we just throw down a Twister mat
and have a few rounds between vintages?
101
00:05:02,219 --> 00:05:03,887
Steady, Frasier, there's still hope.
102
00:05:03,971 --> 00:05:06,641
I'll bring my contractor by in
the morning. The man's a genius.
103
00:05:06,725 --> 00:05:09,687
It's time you boys learned
everything doesn't have to be perfect.
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Yes, it's that kind of advice
that leads to shag carpeting!
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Ah! Good morning, Daphne, extra pancakes
for me this morning. I'm famished.
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Yes, well, you should have
thought about that last night
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before you started making
cracks about English cooking.
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I have hung up my spatula.
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Well, you move my chair,
you cut off my pancake supply.
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Why don't you just back out over Eddie
on your way to work, make it a hat trick?
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[DOORBELL RINGS]
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And a hat trick would be?
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-That's in hockey where one player…
-Enough said. Thank you.
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-Niles.
-Good morning, Frasier.
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I'm delivering one miracle
worker as promised.
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-Joe DeCarlo, Frasier Crane.
-It's a pleasure.
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-And my father Martin Crane.
-Hi, Joe.
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-So where's the scratch?
-What? You mean you can't see it?
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We were gonna put some orange
cones around it so nobody'd fall in it.
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It's right here.
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I can get rid of that.
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It has to be done by 5:00.
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My guests arrive at 7:00.
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So it has to be a firm
5:00, not a 5:15, not a 5:30.
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-I'll have it done by noon.
-Splendid.
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I told you he was good.
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We're talking about a
man who's satisfied Maris.
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Something that's still
regrettably on my "to do" list.
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Coffee's ready.
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00:06:31,379 --> 00:06:34,884
'Course I'm sure it'll taste
like me old bath water to you.
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You know how it gets all gray and scummy
around the edges with little flecks of,
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-oh, hello.
-Hi.
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Hello.
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I'd love some coffee, Daphne.
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Mm… Daphne?
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00:06:54,827 --> 00:06:55,954
Daph, this is Joe DeCarlo.
137
00:06:56,038 --> 00:06:58,039
Joe, this is Daphne.
She helps me out around here.
138
00:06:58,123 --> 00:07:00,376
Smells great. Columbian?
139
00:07:00,460 --> 00:07:02,922
Oh, no, English.
140
00:07:08,179 --> 00:07:11,182
The coffee, heh, Costa Rican.
141
00:07:11,266 --> 00:07:12,392
Would you like a cup?
142
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Thanks.
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00:07:13,770 --> 00:07:15,146
I'll be right back.
144
00:07:16,273 --> 00:07:17,899
He's adorable. Talk me up.
145
00:07:17,983 --> 00:07:19,778
-Plate of pancakes?
-Deal.
146
00:07:21,446 --> 00:07:24,700
-You know, Joe, Daphne's a great gal.
-Oh, yeah.
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00:07:24,784 --> 00:07:27,412
She doesn't always go
around in that ratty old bathrobe.
148
00:07:27,496 --> 00:07:29,206
-No.
-She cleans up real cute.
149
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Oh, yeah.
150
00:07:31,961 --> 00:07:33,587
You don't have to convince me.
151
00:07:33,671 --> 00:07:35,256
You know, I think Dad's right.
152
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You don't need to fix that scratch.
It adds character. Come, Joe.
153
00:07:39,262 --> 00:07:40,430
Niles, forget it.
154
00:07:41,473 --> 00:07:42,515
Honeybun?
155
00:07:42,599 --> 00:07:43,809
Yes?
156
00:07:43,893 --> 00:07:45,980
[GIGGLING]
157
00:07:49,067 --> 00:07:51,402
I meant would you like one
of these with your coffee?
158
00:07:51,486 --> 00:07:53,239
Oh. I'd love one.
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00:07:53,906 --> 00:07:55,200
-Anything else?
-JOE: No.
160
00:07:55,284 --> 00:07:56,952
-Sugar?
-Yes.
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00:07:57,619 --> 00:07:58,954
I meant in the coffee.
162
00:07:59,038 --> 00:08:00,373
Oh! [GIGGLES]
163
00:08:02,418 --> 00:08:03,335
NILES: You know,
164
00:08:03,419 --> 00:08:07,675
Maris is quite keen on gutting my
library to make more space for her hats.
165
00:08:08,509 --> 00:08:09,761
Why don't you come home with me
166
00:08:09,845 --> 00:08:12,096
and you can send one of your
men over to do this little job?
167
00:08:12,180 --> 00:08:13,807
Bruce would be good.
168
00:08:13,891 --> 00:08:16,891
The large sweaty gentleman
with the chili dogs on his breath.
169
00:08:16,979 --> 00:08:20,524
Niles, Joe is here already
and we do have a deadline.
170
00:08:20,608 --> 00:08:22,236
But, don't you think it would be prudent…
171
00:08:22,320 --> 00:08:23,445
Niles, it's settled.
172
00:08:23,529 --> 00:08:26,229
That's great because I'm
kind of anxious to get at her.
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I'll just bet he is.
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00:08:29,245 --> 00:08:31,498
-Oh, Niles.
-The testosterone-driven, tool-wielding…
175
00:08:31,582 --> 00:08:34,043
Niles, Niles, he's
talking about the scratch!
176
00:08:34,127 --> 00:08:36,087
Oh, I knew that!
177
00:08:37,048 --> 00:08:38,215
I mean, I know that.
178
00:08:38,299 --> 00:08:40,010
I mean, watch him!
179
00:08:45,768 --> 00:08:47,644
Someone remodeling?
180
00:08:47,728 --> 00:08:49,856
No, bad wiring in one of the condos.
181
00:08:50,523 --> 00:08:52,693
Well, I hope you gentlemen
won't be working this evening.
182
00:08:52,777 --> 00:08:55,071
I'm entertaining some
very important guests
183
00:08:55,155 --> 00:08:57,616
and, you know how sound
travels in this building.
184
00:08:57,700 --> 00:08:59,076
Can't make any promises.
185
00:08:59,160 --> 00:09:01,960
We're here as long as this
poor sap is willing to pay us.
186
00:09:08,089 --> 00:09:10,175
[LOUD DRILLING]
187
00:09:12,135 --> 00:09:13,429
What is happening?
188
00:09:13,513 --> 00:09:14,555
Hold it down, guys.
189
00:09:15,474 --> 00:09:16,766
Sorry about this, Dr. Crane,
190
00:09:16,850 --> 00:09:20,813
but when I plugged in the sander to
start on the floor, you blew a circuit.
191
00:09:20,897 --> 00:09:23,942
So naturally you're
sawing a hole into my wall.
192
00:09:24,026 --> 00:09:26,404
When the circuit
blew, it started the fire.
193
00:09:26,488 --> 00:09:28,115
You got some real bad wiring in here.
194
00:09:28,199 --> 00:09:29,951
-All right, how long?
-Couple hours.
195
00:09:30,035 --> 00:09:32,495
Now "a couple" is vague.
196
00:09:32,579 --> 00:09:35,249
That would mean the big hand
would be on the 12 and the little hand…
197
00:09:35,333 --> 00:09:36,877
On the four.
198
00:09:36,961 --> 00:09:39,589
Oh, the four? Oh, the four is okay.
Fine, thank you.
199
00:09:39,673 --> 00:09:41,049
And you know the fire?
200
00:09:41,133 --> 00:09:42,176
Eddie smelled it first.
201
00:09:42,260 --> 00:09:45,722
Oh, well, he's a regular
canary in a coal mine, isn't he?
202
00:09:48,226 --> 00:09:50,478
My God, what's going on?
203
00:09:50,562 --> 00:09:52,981
Don't ask, Niles.
Oh, I see you've got the Romanée-Conti?
204
00:09:53,065 --> 00:09:55,777
Yes, but unfortunately
they only had the one bottle.
205
00:09:55,861 --> 00:09:57,780
That's funny, the importer
told me he had two.
206
00:09:57,864 --> 00:09:59,073
Really? How strange.
207
00:10:04,497 --> 00:10:06,249
If I didn't know you better, I would swear
208
00:10:06,333 --> 00:10:08,418
that you had squirreled
one away for yourself.
209
00:10:08,502 --> 00:10:11,673
But then we both know that
you must be telling the truth
210
00:10:11,757 --> 00:10:13,592
because you're such a slave to your ethics
211
00:10:13,676 --> 00:10:17,849
that even the slightest transgression
would cause your nose to bleed.
212
00:10:20,185 --> 00:10:21,854
Which it isn't.
213
00:10:23,147 --> 00:10:24,065
You just sniffed.
214
00:10:24,858 --> 00:10:25,858
I didn't sniff.
215
00:10:25,942 --> 00:10:27,487
It was a snort of contempt.
216
00:10:28,196 --> 00:10:30,449
A snort is out. That was in.
217
00:10:31,450 --> 00:10:34,829
Oh, all right. The other bottle's
in the car in my bowling bag.
218
00:10:34,913 --> 00:10:35,748
Thank you.
219
00:10:37,500 --> 00:10:39,377
You have a bowling bag?
220
00:10:39,461 --> 00:10:42,590
Yes, Maris and I have taken
to giving each other gag gifts.
221
00:10:44,635 --> 00:10:45,761
I gave her a cookbook.
222
00:10:48,097 --> 00:10:49,307
Oh, yoo-hoo.
223
00:10:51,227 --> 00:10:55,273
I, uh, noticed how your
shirt was clinging to your back
224
00:10:55,357 --> 00:11:00,196
and I thought a glass of
iced tea might hit the spot.
225
00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:01,406
Oh, thanks, Daph.
226
00:11:01,490 --> 00:11:02,783
Oh! [LAUGHS]
227
00:11:02,867 --> 00:11:05,704
-I got a spark.
-Me, too.
228
00:11:05,788 --> 00:11:09,338
That's just static electricity from
the carpet. It can happen to anyone.
229
00:11:09,751 --> 00:11:11,546
-I'll show you. Watch.
-Niles.
230
00:11:17,303 --> 00:11:18,888
Stop poking me!
231
00:11:21,392 --> 00:11:24,520
Should I put these little fingery
foods for tonight in the fridge?
232
00:11:24,604 --> 00:11:26,690
Oh, yes, please.
The brie is sweating up a storm.
233
00:11:26,774 --> 00:11:29,736
-Let me help you with those.
-No, Daphne, let me help you.
234
00:11:29,820 --> 00:11:33,408
Excuse me, Bruce. Jeez!
Spark, spark! Did you see the…
235
00:11:37,746 --> 00:11:41,460
Well, I will be back after work at 5:30.
236
00:11:41,544 --> 00:11:45,715
I hope I have your word that my
apartment will be perfect by then.
237
00:11:45,799 --> 00:11:48,844
-Sure thing.
-All right, think before you answer.
238
00:11:48,928 --> 00:11:51,264
This is not like marriage vows
or a promise to a dying parent.
239
00:11:51,348 --> 00:11:52,698
This really, really counts.
240
00:11:54,728 --> 00:11:55,896
You have my word.
241
00:11:56,814 --> 00:11:57,898
Thank you.
242
00:11:57,982 --> 00:11:59,526
Man, I am sweating like a pig.
243
00:11:59,610 --> 00:12:00,985
I gotta air myself out.
244
00:12:01,069 --> 00:12:03,906
-Hold the elevator, will you?
-I'm sorry. I need this nose tonight.
245
00:12:03,990 --> 00:12:05,159
Thank you.
246
00:12:07,411 --> 00:12:09,497
You don't have to keep feeding these men.
247
00:12:09,581 --> 00:12:12,681
Actually, Maris finds they work
faster if you keep them hungry.
248
00:12:13,169 --> 00:12:14,837
I don't mind.
249
00:12:14,921 --> 00:12:18,271
'Course I probably don't cook as
well as their wives or girlfriends.
250
00:12:19,302 --> 00:12:22,557
That is, if they all have girlfriends.
251
00:12:22,641 --> 00:12:25,770
I'm sure Joe's probably
mentioned some girl to you.
252
00:12:27,647 --> 00:12:28,565
No.
253
00:12:28,649 --> 00:12:29,483
Really?
254
00:12:30,400 --> 00:12:32,444
That is, not any one girl.
255
00:12:32,528 --> 00:12:35,074
Not old "Love 'em and leave 'em Joe."
256
00:12:37,201 --> 00:12:40,288
From what I've heard, he's
wrecked more homes than he's fixed.
257
00:12:40,665 --> 00:12:42,624
Mimsy Stanhope has him over all the time
258
00:12:42,708 --> 00:12:45,045
and I don't just mean
to strip her entry way.
259
00:12:46,798 --> 00:12:48,174
Oh, I see.
260
00:12:49,510 --> 00:12:50,343
I'm sorry, Daphne.
261
00:12:50,427 --> 00:12:54,224
No, it's better I should know
now before I get me hopes up.
262
00:12:55,016 --> 00:12:56,811
Thank you for being honest with me.
263
00:13:12,748 --> 00:13:13,916
Ah.
264
00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:15,669
[WHIRRING STARTS]
265
00:13:24,597 --> 00:13:25,557
FRASIER: Joe?
266
00:13:25,641 --> 00:13:28,353
Dr. Crane, don't panic.
I can explain everything.
267
00:13:28,437 --> 00:13:29,312
Wonderful.
268
00:13:29,396 --> 00:13:32,650
Then perhaps you can explain these legs.
269
00:13:33,985 --> 00:13:36,196
That's Cecil.
He's the best ceiling guy in Seattle.
270
00:13:36,280 --> 00:13:39,659
We were lucky to get him. When we opened
up the wall to get at the faulty wiring,
271
00:13:39,743 --> 00:13:42,788
we found the gas pipes leading
to your fireplace were cracked.
272
00:13:42,872 --> 00:13:45,124
-Had to be fixed.
-Tonight?
273
00:13:45,208 --> 00:13:48,588
I okayed it. It just seemed
wiser to do it before the explosion.
274
00:13:52,927 --> 00:13:53,762
Frasier!
275
00:13:54,429 --> 00:13:58,101
The club members arrive in 45 minutes!
Have you lost your… Cecil!
276
00:14:01,773 --> 00:14:02,981
Niles, don't yell at me.
277
00:14:03,065 --> 00:14:05,402
If you were able to lift anything
heavier than an emery board,
278
00:14:05,486 --> 00:14:07,113
we wouldn't be in this position.
279
00:14:07,197 --> 00:14:09,156
Well, maybe next time
you'll listen to your old man.
280
00:14:09,240 --> 00:14:10,617
Thank you, Dad. I was just considering
281
00:14:10,701 --> 00:14:12,244
whether I should go
shave or slit my wrists.
282
00:14:12,328 --> 00:14:15,833
-You've made my choice a little easier.
-Don't worry, we're gonna make it.
283
00:14:15,917 --> 00:14:21,089
Only, about that shaving, we had to
shut the water off to replace a valve.
284
00:14:21,173 --> 00:14:24,804
Oh, well that explosion idea's
sounding better and better.
285
00:14:26,013 --> 00:14:28,891
Would someone at least move
that mantlepiece away from the door?
286
00:14:28,975 --> 00:14:30,602
[PHONE RINGING]
287
00:14:30,686 --> 00:14:31,729
-Hello?
-[LOUD SCRAPING]
288
00:14:31,813 --> 00:14:34,483
Yes, oh, just hold on, will you?
289
00:14:38,071 --> 00:14:39,030
-Hey, Joe?
-Yeah.
290
00:14:39,657 --> 00:14:41,950
You know, you're gonna be through by 7:00?
291
00:14:42,034 --> 00:14:44,384
Gives you plenty of time
for dinner and a movie.
292
00:14:48,919 --> 00:14:49,753
Excuse me.
293
00:14:49,837 --> 00:14:52,382
[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
294
00:14:55,719 --> 00:14:58,306
I said, I don't want to go out with you!
295
00:15:02,228 --> 00:15:04,731
Well, what're you looking at?
Get back to work!
296
00:15:05,524 --> 00:15:06,818
Thanks a lot.
297
00:15:07,527 --> 00:15:10,072
Why would she do that?
She's crazy about him.
298
00:15:16,622 --> 00:15:18,875
Niles, is your nose bleeding?
299
00:15:18,959 --> 00:15:21,629
No, no, I was just
admiring Cecil's handiwork.
300
00:15:23,798 --> 00:15:25,217
That was the mayor on the phone.
301
00:15:25,301 --> 00:15:30,141
Apparently his wife can't make it
tonight, so he has invited Senator Adler.
302
00:15:31,517 --> 00:15:33,394
Could anything else possibly go wrong?
303
00:15:33,478 --> 00:15:34,479
Take a look at that.
304
00:15:36,733 --> 00:15:37,692
Oh, dear God,
305
00:15:38,568 --> 00:15:39,945
is that blood on my floor?
306
00:15:42,991 --> 00:15:44,659
And another drop.
307
00:15:50,250 --> 00:15:51,085
Niles!
308
00:15:57,969 --> 00:15:59,220
Well?
309
00:16:00,222 --> 00:16:04,072
Is it terribly wrong to mislead someone,
even if it's for his or her own good?
310
00:16:04,394 --> 00:16:05,980
What did you tell Daphne?
311
00:16:07,023 --> 00:16:10,151
I made up a story that Joe
seduces all the women he works for
312
00:16:10,235 --> 00:16:11,863
so she wouldn't go out with him.
313
00:16:11,947 --> 00:16:15,200
Oh, Niles, how could you be so selfish?
314
00:16:15,284 --> 00:16:17,369
I didn't do it for me. I did it for her.
315
00:16:17,453 --> 00:16:19,539
She deserves a doctor or a lawyer.
316
00:16:19,623 --> 00:16:21,873
Someone for whom a
T-shirt is an undergarment.
317
00:16:24,421 --> 00:16:26,507
Look, I don't know what
sort of twisted fantasy
318
00:16:26,591 --> 00:16:27,967
you've concocted about you and Daphne.
319
00:16:28,051 --> 00:16:30,345
I suppose it involves a
comet hitting the earth and you
320
00:16:30,429 --> 00:16:32,473
and she having to rebuild the species.
321
00:16:34,267 --> 00:16:36,646
But trust me, Niles, it
is not going to happen.
322
00:16:37,814 --> 00:16:42,278
She needs a man that can do
more for her than just smell her hair.
323
00:16:45,658 --> 00:16:47,619
-Daphne!
-What are you going to do?
324
00:16:47,703 --> 00:16:48,912
You are going to fix this.
325
00:16:48,996 --> 00:16:50,331
What am I gonna tell her?
326
00:16:50,415 --> 00:16:52,207
Tell her the truth.
327
00:16:52,291 --> 00:16:54,753
Only the truth shall make you clot.
328
00:16:59,300 --> 00:17:00,135
Yes, Dr. Crane?
329
00:17:00,219 --> 00:17:03,682
Yes, Daphne, Niles has something
he wishes to discuss with you.
330
00:17:04,433 --> 00:17:05,935
What is it, Dr. Crane?
331
00:17:06,019 --> 00:17:08,564
Oh, look, you have a spot on your tie.
332
00:17:10,733 --> 00:17:13,737
Well, earlier, [CLEARS THROAT]
what I said about Joe.
333
00:17:14,905 --> 00:17:15,906
I made a mistake.
334
00:17:16,782 --> 00:17:19,786
He doesn't sleep around.
He hasn't wrecked any homes.
335
00:17:19,870 --> 00:17:22,915
And [SNIFFLES] the business
about Mimsy Stanhope…
336
00:17:24,460 --> 00:17:25,461
Oh, sorry.
337
00:17:26,171 --> 00:17:28,521
Is there a john around
here that ain't occupado?
338
00:17:29,884 --> 00:17:31,886
You can use the master bedroom.
339
00:17:33,055 --> 00:17:35,516
Joe never worked for Mimsy Stanhope.
340
00:17:35,600 --> 00:17:36,475
He sure didn't.
341
00:17:36,559 --> 00:17:38,520
I do all the work at Mimsy's.
342
00:17:38,604 --> 00:17:41,107
She is one tough lady to satisfy.
343
00:17:41,191 --> 00:17:42,025
You?
344
00:17:42,901 --> 00:17:44,901
I'm the only guy who can make her happy.
345
00:17:46,990 --> 00:17:48,283
Everybody knows that.
346
00:17:50,328 --> 00:17:53,164
So that was the mistake you made.
347
00:17:53,248 --> 00:17:56,127
Those stories you heard weren't about Joe.
348
00:17:56,211 --> 00:17:57,670
They were about Bruce?
349
00:18:00,216 --> 00:18:01,801
Hard to believe, isn't it?
350
00:18:03,261 --> 00:18:06,599
But you know, when society women
go slumming, they go all the way.
351
00:18:08,644 --> 00:18:13,190
So you can tell Joe that you've changed
your mind about going out with him.
352
00:18:13,274 --> 00:18:15,235
Oh, no, I couldn't.
353
00:18:15,319 --> 00:18:16,403
What would I say?
354
00:18:16,487 --> 00:18:19,407
Well, just tell him the truth.
Tell him that I heard stories that he…
355
00:18:19,491 --> 00:18:20,493
Oh, no, bad idea.
356
00:18:22,704 --> 00:18:25,750
Here, you wait here.
357
00:18:31,048 --> 00:18:32,092
-Joe?
-Yeah?
358
00:18:36,013 --> 00:18:37,663
You have to ask Daphne out again.
359
00:18:38,308 --> 00:18:39,934
Are you nuts? You heard what she said.
360
00:18:40,018 --> 00:18:42,268
Yes, but if you ask her
again, she'll say yes.
361
00:18:42,897 --> 00:18:44,316
Hey, maybe I've changed my mind.
362
00:18:44,400 --> 00:18:46,944
Oh, no, you haven't changed your mind.
363
00:18:47,028 --> 00:18:50,365
You're just letting masculine vanity
and hurt feelings keep you from something
364
00:18:50,449 --> 00:18:53,078
that other men can only
dream of in their oxblood,
365
00:18:53,162 --> 00:18:55,712
Cetus leather, wing back
chairs with the lights off.
366
00:18:58,627 --> 00:19:01,464
Look, Dr. Crane, I just don't
think it would work out, okay?
367
00:19:01,548 --> 00:19:03,091
No, it's not okay.
368
00:19:04,427 --> 00:19:06,077
If you had ever smelled her hair,
369
00:19:07,013 --> 00:19:09,349
you'd know she's worth
at least one more try.
370
00:19:09,975 --> 00:19:11,060
She is an angel.
371
00:19:11,144 --> 00:19:12,645
She is a goddess.
372
00:19:12,729 --> 00:19:14,982
And she's waiting for you in the bathroom.
373
00:19:27,498 --> 00:19:29,418
You… You got a minute?
374
00:19:33,924 --> 00:19:35,468
[GROANS]
375
00:19:44,271 --> 00:19:45,856
-We're never gonna make it.
-[PHONE RINGS]
376
00:19:45,940 --> 00:19:47,358
Daphne, would you please get that?
377
00:19:47,442 --> 00:19:49,319
Jeez, I thought you were
just gonna slit your wrists.
378
00:19:49,403 --> 00:19:51,906
Looks like you went for
death by a thousand cuts.
379
00:19:52,741 --> 00:19:54,492
I cut myself because I
was shaving without water.
380
00:19:54,576 --> 00:19:57,538
And why was there no water? Because I had
to move your chair which gouged the floor
381
00:19:57,622 --> 00:19:58,915
which made me call for Joe
382
00:19:58,999 --> 00:20:00,793
who found bad pipes which called for Cecil
383
00:20:00,877 --> 00:20:04,777
who ate the cat that killed the rat that
lived in the house that Frasier built!
384
00:20:08,762 --> 00:20:09,889
That was the doorman.
385
00:20:09,973 --> 00:20:13,310
-Senator Adler's limousine just pulled up.
-Oh, it's over.
386
00:20:13,894 --> 00:20:14,770
It's over.
387
00:20:15,354 --> 00:20:17,357
Sing, fat lady, sing.
388
00:20:18,316 --> 00:20:19,484
Frasier, what are we gonna do?
389
00:20:19,568 --> 00:20:21,821
You're gonna give me your cash,
both of you. Come on, hurry up.
390
00:20:21,905 --> 00:20:24,324
Never mind why. Just hand it to me.
Come on, be quick, Niles.
391
00:20:24,408 --> 00:20:26,076
All right. You want all 700 dollars?
392
00:20:26,160 --> 00:20:27,871
You carry 700 dollars in your wallet?
393
00:20:27,955 --> 00:20:30,582
Well, Maris asked me to
stop by the drugstore later.
394
00:20:32,252 --> 00:20:33,545
Just hand it over.
395
00:20:35,256 --> 00:20:38,426
Okay, guys, I got 700
and some odd dollars here.
396
00:20:38,510 --> 00:20:41,138
If you can get everything cleared up
before Frasier's buddies get up here,
397
00:20:41,222 --> 00:20:43,058
it's yours to split any way
you want on the way out.
398
00:20:43,142 --> 00:20:45,060
Bribery? That's your big plan?
399
00:20:45,144 --> 00:20:46,521
Let's go! Come on.
400
00:20:50,151 --> 00:20:51,569
My God, it's starting to work!
401
00:20:51,653 --> 00:20:52,779
It's starting to work!
402
00:20:52,863 --> 00:20:55,813
Hey, here's another hundred I
was holding out on my old man!
403
00:21:00,707 --> 00:21:03,000
-Dr. Crane?
-Yes.
404
00:21:03,084 --> 00:21:04,795
Joe told me what you did.
405
00:21:05,755 --> 00:21:08,717
I think that's the nicest thing
anyone's ever done for me.
406
00:21:09,217 --> 00:21:10,053
Thank you.
407
00:21:10,595 --> 00:21:11,470
[ELECTRICITY CRACKLES]
408
00:21:11,554 --> 00:21:12,973
-[YELPS]
-Did you feel that?
409
00:21:13,057 --> 00:21:15,100
-We made a spark.
-Oh, yes, we did.
410
00:21:15,184 --> 00:21:16,519
I guess you were right.
411
00:21:16,603 --> 00:21:18,104
It is just the carpet.
412
00:21:20,691 --> 00:21:24,141
Okay, everybody, come on! Move
it, move it, move it! We're outta here!
413
00:21:24,989 --> 00:21:27,326
-You ready?
-Good night.
414
00:21:29,411 --> 00:21:31,261
Good night, Daphne. Have a good time.
415
00:21:31,831 --> 00:21:34,584
Oh, my God, we did it!
416
00:21:34,668 --> 00:21:36,004
We actually did it!
417
00:21:36,088 --> 00:21:38,840
Oh, Dad please, please don't leave.
I'd like you to stay.
418
00:21:38,924 --> 00:21:41,427
I mean, you helped me
get this put together tonight.
419
00:21:41,511 --> 00:21:43,763
Thanks, Fras, that makes me feel good.
420
00:21:43,847 --> 00:21:45,850
Not good enough to hang
around with that bleeding heart,
421
00:21:45,934 --> 00:21:48,562
softy-on-crime Senator Adler, but good.
422
00:21:49,480 --> 00:21:51,733
Come on, Eddie, politicians are coming.
423
00:21:53,693 --> 00:21:54,987
[DOORBELL RINGS]
424
00:21:55,071 --> 00:21:55,947
They're here.
425
00:22:00,078 --> 00:22:04,291
Senator Adler, Mayor,
welcome to my humble abode.
426
00:22:04,875 --> 00:22:06,775
You know you're outta TP in the can?
427
00:22:15,098 --> 00:22:18,065
♪ Hey, baby, I hear the blues a-callin' ♪
428
00:22:18,149 --> 00:22:20,730
♪ Tossed salads and scrambled eggs ♪
429
00:22:20,814 --> 00:22:22,106
Quite stylish.
430
00:22:22,190 --> 00:22:24,360
♪ And maybe I seem a bit confused ♪
431
00:22:24,444 --> 00:22:27,113
♪ Well, maybe, but I got you pegged ♪
432
00:22:27,197 --> 00:22:29,240
Ha, ha, ha, ha!
433
00:22:29,324 --> 00:22:31,077
♪ But I don't know what to do ♪
434
00:22:31,161 --> 00:22:34,373
♪ With those tossed salads
and scrambled eggs ♪
435
00:22:35,291 --> 00:22:38,002
♪ They're callin' again ♪
436
00:22:38,086 --> 00:22:39,630
Good night!