(loud rattling)
(gasps)
You all right?
(sighs): I hate flying.
It's just a little turbulence. We'll be through it in a minute.
(gasps)
Mother of God!
This is kind of embarrassing.
I mean, I treat people for this.
I'm a psychiatrist. Well, there's a small world.
I'm a psychiatrist, too. Dr. Frasier Crane.
Oh. I've heard your show.
Dr. Anne Ranberg. Lovely to meet you.
Nice to meet you. (chuckles)
Well, don't let me interrupt you.
You seemed kind of deep in thought.
Oh, I suppose I was.
It's been a rather eventful three weeks for me.
If you want to talk about it,
it might get our minds off the flight.
It's really rather personal. Nothing you'd be interested in .
Okay, then.
(rattling)
So, I was dating this woman. Mm-hmm.
Weren't we on our way to lunch?
Yes.
And then you followed me in here when I came to get my briefcase
and uttered the fatal phrase that no man can resist.
I said I like your pillow shams.
Nice try, my little temptress,
but I'm down for at least an hour.
Do you still have time for lunch before work?
Well, my show doesn't start till 2:00, and it's only...
Oh, dear God!
Where the hell is he? I don't know!
I called his cell, I've called his house.
You're gonna have to go on for him.
Me? Yeah, you. Well, I'm not.
Last time I did it, it was a total disaster.
Aren't you always saying you used to be a deejay?
Oh, 20 years ago. I can't do that anymore. It'll come back to you.
You got five seconds.
I can't! I'm a nervous wreck.
My palms are sweaty, my mouth is like cotton.
Hey, Emerald City! Kenny Daly here.
Master of the mike, baron of the booth,
the man of the hour, too sweet to be sour.
The doctor's out today!
But Kenny's here,
filling the seat, taking the heat.
I might even throw in a call or two to Grandma Gert.
(old lady voice) : But no kids. I hate kids!
Ooh-hoo, she's in a mood today.
KENNY: And who's this coming into the booth?
Why, it's Percy Von Snootenheim.
FRASIER: Turn that off.
I'm sorry I have to rush off.
I wish we could spend the whole day together.
I don't leave for Chicago until midnight.
I'll come over and make you dinner.
Oh, that sounds great. I'd love that.
Any requests? Uh...
I liked what I had for lunch.
(laughs)
Why don't I just surprise you.
(chuckles): Still sounding like lunch.
Isn't that a great song, people?
Really brings back the memories.
Sorry I kind of forgot the words there in the middle.
So, let's toss it to the news.
Where the hell have you been?
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I had a doctor's appointment.
It couldn't be helped.
Just in time, Doc.
This turned out to be one of your better shows.
Thank you, Kenny.
Darling. Bebe! What are you doing here?
I just came by... to see my favorite client--
and the wonderful man who's given him such a happy, happy home.
Aw, you're the best, Bebe.
Good news. I'm busting you out of this hellhole.
What? Did you ever hear of Dr. Mark Reisman?
The San Francisco radio psychiatrist?
Yes, we had a nice encounter once at a conference.
Well, last week he had a not so nice encounter
with a falling air conditioner.
Anyway,
they want you to replace him, and the money's huge.
Poor Mark.
What a ghastly way to die.
Yes, I cried so hard, it was all I could do
to stuff your demo tape in the Fed Ex pouch.
But they want you.
Well, it's very tempting, Bebe,
but I'm very happy here in Seattle.
I don't want to leave.
Darling, it's San Francisco.
Do you know what life is like there
for a good-looking straight man?
You'll be like a Snickers bar at a fat camp.
Eh, no. My answer is still no, Bebe.
I've got to begin my show.
Well, that's gratitude for you.
Do you have any idea the lengths I went to
to make this happen? Wait a minute.
You were in San Francisco last week.
Don't tell me...
I was nowhere near that air conditioner.
You're worse than the police.
We're such a clich?--
little woman at the stove,
big, rugged man with his brawny arm...
Ooh! The hollandaise is breaking.
Dad.
I thought you were going out
with Niles and Daphne. I'm waiting on Ronee.
Listen, Charlotte is leaving for Chicago in three hours.
This is our farewell dinner.
Oh, hi, Martin. Oh, hi. How are you?
Don't worry. We're leaving.
I'm not gonna spoil your romantic mood.
Hey, Ronee, what, did you fall in?!
(doorbell rings) Good heavens, I thought
you were meeting them downstairs.
That's what I thought, too.
Hey, Martin.
Oh, thank God you're home, Doc.
I'm going a little crazy-- I need some advice.
Kenny, we just put dinner on the table.
Oh, thanks, but I'm too worked up to eat.
Doing your show today, I... I got the fever.
I want to get back behind the mike.
But should I quit my job, throw away my whole career
and financial security just to chase some cockamamie dream?
Yes! Off you go.
You didn't even have to think about it.
You always believed in me, Doc.
(crying): Kenny Daly.
Hi. Nice to meet you. This, is, uh, Charlotte.
I'm getting all messy here.
Let me just pop into the powder room real fast.
g! MARTIN: Ronee! While we're youn
Too late.
Well, have a great evening, you two.
Yes, uh, thank you. Bye.
Oh, damn it, my contact slipped. Hang on.
KENNY: Whoa! Whoa, yourself.
Do we know him?
Knock, knock. FRASIER:Oh, for God's sake!
No, I know it's your special night,
but my very pregnant wife insisted we come up.
Sorry. Won't be a minute.
KENNY: Whoa! Oh, sorry.
I'll just run down the hall.
Maybe I'll start over on that dinner.
NILES: I-I'm sorry for intruding,
but nowadays Daphne can't go ten minutes.
We're late for everything.
Yes, well, you know how Chez Henri hates it
when people are late, so I'll tell you what,
why don't we call for that elevator right now.
And tell Henri that the first round of drinks
is on me.
Whiskey, please. Simon!
Oh, Frasier! How are you?
Please leave immediately. (guffaws)
Hey...
Oh!
There's my little sister.
You're not so little anymore there, are you?
Simon, what are you doing here?
Well, I heard you was knocked up,
so I-I brought you a present.
Come on in, lads!
Oh, sis! Oh, my God! Michael!
Hello, sis!
And Stephen!
SIMON: We knew you'd be here when we went to your house
and you wasn't there. So we took the liberty
of leaving our things in your guest room.
How did you get in?
How did we...
Stephen and Michael, this is my husband Niles.
Oh, and his brother Frasier.
And this is Martin and his fiance Ronee.
Hi. How are you?
And, sorry, your name again?
Kenny. Kenny.
(thick accent): So, I'll tell you what...
(speaking indecipherable cockney)
I tell you what, he did bloody well for himself.
SIMON: That's right, Michael.
Frasier does very well for himself.
Tell you what, let's take the tour.
There will be no tours!
MARTIN: Listen, uh, why don't you guys join us for dinner?
I'll lay the table. Is this real silver?
Give me that!
(speaking indecipherable cockney)
It's-it's a bloody great ashtray, isn't it?
(shrieks)
Put that down!
You know, we could have some real fun
if you got rid of some of those people.
Oh, just give us a minute, then, love.
(Charlotte screams)
Who is that creep?!
You know, I'm getting some very mixed signals.
All right, that's it!
I want you all out of here!
And I do not mean
a leisurely exit-- I mean a break-neck,
trampling-each-other, this-theater's-on- fire stampede!
All right, you know, I can take a hint, Frasier, right? Look.
That's a lovely woman that you've got for yourself.
Congratulations. Yeah, yeah. Yes, thank you.
Yeah, give us a call. I'll be at...
Oh, get out of here!
Because it's not a word.
Yes, it is. No, it's not.
Yes, it is. Use it in a sentence.
Her grandmother's bed
was warm and quilty.
And why is she lying there?
Because she's feeling all "befevered" again?
Could I borrow your 'F'?
I've got a little message for you.
(phone rings)
Hello?
Okay. Thanks.
My car's here.
Mm.
I still don't know why
you won't let me drive you to the airport.
No. I can't stand all that airport good-bye stuff.
This is better. Right.
Well, then... Look, let's not...
Right, right. Because...
if you start... Yeah, me, too. Okay, uh...
Well, then, uh, good luck in Chicago.
Thanks.
Got your ticket? Uh...
Yeah. Great, great.
Oh, oh, listen, I have a little something here for you.
Damn it, I knew you were gonna do something sweet like that.
I didn't get you anything.
It's just a hair band I found in the shower drain.
Thanks. (chuckles): Yeah.
Let me get your coat.
This wasn't supposed to be so hard.
... I don't know about you, but
I've had enough easy good-byes.
I'm kind of glad to have the chance
to have another tough one.
Thank you
for a great three weeks.
Bye, Charlotte.
Bye, Frasier.
(sighs)
(rapid knocking)
Forgot my scarf.
Oh, oh, my fault. (chuckles)
All right.
Bye. Bye.
(rapid knocking)
Cell phone.
Oh! Oh, yes. Here. Cell phone.
Here you go.
Ow! Oh!
Oh... Oh, oh...
I'm sorry. No, it's...
it's my fault.
Lord...
Ay.
Yeah, uh... Bye.
See you. See you.
(groans)
(sighs)
(knocking)
Oh, for God's sake, what now?
We couldn't say good-bye on a head butt.
Feel better?
Positively quilty.
Oh, hey, Niles.
Hi, Dad.
What are you doing here?
Escaping.
I woke this morning to find Daphne's brothers
playing a game called "I Can Reach It From Here. "
Give you a hint-- the "it" was a toilet.
And there were no winners.
Oh, also I stopped by to see how Frasier's holding up.
He was asleep when I got home, and he's still in bed.
He's probably depressed.
I'm sure this whole Charlotte thing has got him bereft...
Shh, shh.
Morning, Dad. Hey, Niles.
How's it going ? How you doing?
Let me get you a cup of coffee.
I can get it.
I brought you some of those cookies you like.
Milanos.
Oh, well, thank you.
Now you just sit down.
I made you a little breakfast.
I see what's going on.
You think I'm in tatters
because Charlotte's gone back to Chicago.
Well, I'm not.
I'm not going to say I won't miss her like crazy.
But we knew going in that our time was limited.
We made the most of it. I have no regrets.
Morning.
Except for leaving that door unlocked.
DAPHNE: We thought you might
Iike to join us for brunch.
Darn. Niles and I just reserved a squash court.
Yes, and we're on thin ice with the appointments director as it is.
He's already moved our lockers
next to the flip-flop drop.
(speaking indecipherable cockney)
SIMON: That's right, Michael.
Frasier has a very nice flat, but you was here last night.
Was I?
Oh, I think I need to sit down a minute
before we go.
Can you believe this baby might be two weeks late?
STEPHEN: He's a Moon all right.
Every lad in our family was at least two weeks late.
Once we get comfy, nothing budges us, right, lads?
Right.
Can I get a glass of water, please?
Glass of water, yes.
Right, right.
... Oh, Frasier, be a good lad
(indecipherable)
Right, lads?
Three.
Do you have any idea what he's saying?
Not a word.
Apparently Stephen was dropped as a child.
I thought the mumbler was Michael.
He was dropped on Michael.
The idea that our son might take after them
is making me crazy.
Now, Niles, just remember
those hearty Crane genes are in there, too.
Please. Those Moon genes have probably beaten our genes up
and stolen their lunch money.
That is why I am taking action.
I was going to wait to do this till tonight,
but I can see that every minute is critical.
What's this?
This is called the Born Musician.
You put this speaker on the mother's stomach,
and it bombards the baby with classical music,
thus instilling a taste for higher culture.
The closest thing we had to that was Dad bongoing out "Babalu"
. on Mom's belly
Here we are.
Oh, Niles, look what Stephen just gave me.
You know who'll be jealous? Mrs. Zicklin from the building.
Doesn't she have one just like this?
No, I don't think she does.
I brought you a present, too.
This plays soothing music for the baby.
You see, you put this speaker here,
just like that.
And then if you want to hear a selection of say,
I don't know, Vivaldi, you turn this dial.
. And then..
Goodness, he's never kicked like that before.
We've got a little footballer in the family.
SIMON: Finally we got something we can drink to.
MICHAEL: Let's go to the pub.
(all agreeing)
?? We hate Nottingham Forest??
?? We hate Liverpool, too??
And Leeds!
Are you coming, Martin? I'm still waiting on Ronee.
We'll meet you at the restaurant.
Okay.
Marty, I just got off the phone
with the Branford Inn.
They called to confirm our wedding reservation for May 1 5.
But we're getting married July 1 5.
Yes, but they have us down for May.
Apparently July 1 5 is booked along with every other weekend
between now and October.
What happened?
I don't know. You made the reservation.
For July 1 5.
I love how she blames me.
Why would I randomly pick a...
Oh, no.
FRASIER: What?
May 1 5-- Eddie's birthday.
Well, I'm sure you can find someplace else.
We had our hearts set on the Branford Inn.
It's where we had our second date.
We had a little too much wine,
and the couple at the next table
said, "Get a room, " and so we did.
Well, I guess I better start thinking about Plan B.
Damn.
Well, I just feel sorry for Ronee.
You know, her first wedding was kind of bare-boned.
That's why she had her heart s on something special.
You know--
fancy menu, swing band, flowers everywhere.
You need that once in your life.
You know, Dad, Niles and I have been wondering
what to get you for your wedding.
And maybe we could just give you the wedding.
You still have the Branford Inn on the 15th.
But that's eight days away.
You'd have to get a caterer, a justice of the peace.
I can officiate.
I still have my license from that time I married
those two commitment-phobes on my Valentine's show.
Are they still together?
Not the time, Niles.
Ronee, the boys think they can
throw a fancy wedding together by May 15th.
But that's in eight days.
Well, it only took us four days to throw together
our seafood-themed "Friends of the Marina Bouilla-bash. "
Well, all right, good. That's great of you guys.
Thank you.
Well, what do you know?
Well, leave it to the duke and duchess
to save our behinds.
I'm sorry. Leave it to whom?
What, they don't know about that one?
Just keep walking.
BOTH: Well, obviously, you're the duchess...
FRASIER: Dancers.
(clapping)
Rehearsal is over.
Please wait upstairs.
I don't want anyone to see you
until the floor show.
(knocking)
I'm sorry. We're still setting up.
Clint, would you please go outside
and tell everyone they can't come in here
until after the ceremony.
It will spoil the entire reveal.
You can't blame them. It's 90 degrees out there.
It's dripping wet.
I hope our Chinese acrobats are sufficiently rosined.
MARTIN: Holy mackerel.
You guys are amazing.
Well, I'm glad you like it, you two,
but listen, you've got to go get changed.
You're getting married in ten minutes.
Traffic was bad-- we got stuck
behind this old bus, a church group, I think.
Good. Our gospel choir is here.
Niles, go make sure they're
fitted with their angel wings
and give them all a meal voucher.
(knocking)
ROZ: Frasier!
Roz, I'm sorry. I can't let you in.
I know it's warm out there...
Tell you what, go have a cool drink with Kenny.
I just did.
He told me all about his new deejay job.
Oh, well, good for him.
I'll come down and give him a hug.
Well, bring a towel.
He just sweated through a hammock.
This sucks.
The softest boss we ever had is leaving.
Come on, Frasier. Let me in. It's hot.
All right, Roz. I can't say I blame you.
It's like the ninth circle of hell out here.
Do you love this weather or what?
Bebe, what are you doing here?
Your strategy worked, you genius.
What strategy?
Turning down the San Francisco job.
They offered you 20% more money
and thrown in a weekly TV gig on the morning news.
Television?
Well, that certainly sounds tempting, but...
but my home is here.
There are more important things than money.
Yes, I know. There's power, but money can buy that.
Bebe!
Fine.
If you don't like the terms of the deal,
I'll have another swing at it.
Did that old man just faint?
What?!
Oh, good Lord.
That's my cannon operator. At the end of the ceremony,
he's supposed to fire that antique cannon.
I'm not sure there's anybody else
who knows how to work the damn thing.
(groans)
Frasier!
Niles!
BOTH: Disaster!
Dear God. You first.
Our cannon man is down-- heatstroke.
Our flower girl is down-- drunk.
The flower girl?
Apparently someone gave her champagne.
Who would give liquor to a six-year-old girl?
Party's here, lads.
Simon, did you give our flower girl champagne?
I may have.
Well, the poor little thing was nervous
about getting her part right.
Nervous.
Here's our little ring bearer.
Ronee will be down in two minutes.
Oh, great.
Still no flower girl, and now no one to fire our cannon.
Cannon?
If it's a cannon you need fired,
Michael's your man.
DAPHNE: Oh, yeah.
He's a great one for shooting things.
Which foot is it that's missing two toes?
Um... that one.
All right, then,
come along, all of you.
See if you can figure out this thing.
Now, your cue to fire it is when I say,
at the end of the ceremony, "Ladies and gentlemen,
Mr. and Mrs. Martin Crane. " You got it?
(speaking indecipherable cockney)
Boom.
Is Eddie growling?
It's his stomach. Poor thing hasn't eaten since morning.
We can't have him rumbling up the aisle.
Give him some of that pate.
Ooh, Roz, do you think
that we could enlist Alice to be our flower girl?
What do you say, honey? Sure.
Oh, that's splendid news.
Here, take these rose petals.
You're suppose to strew them in the aisle
as you lead the procession in and out.
NILES: You know what?
Guess I better give our ring bearer
his precious cargo.
FRASIER: Roz!
Her cue to lead the procession out
at the end of the ceremony
is when I say, "Ladies and gentlemen,
Mr. and Mrs. Martin Crane. "
(cannon booms)
Not now!
(tires squealing, thud)
What the hell was that?!
What are you looking for?
The ring. I dropped it when...
It's in the pate. Eddie, no!
FRASIER: Just our luck.
, When the gun went off, it startled a truck driver
and he slammed into a lamppost.
Now the entire roadway is blocked.
Can anything else go wrong at this wedding?
What?
There's a veterinarian's five minutes from here.
I'm sure he can make Eddie cough up that ring.
All right, then off you go.
Both of you. Hurry, please.
We've only got the skywriter till 5:00.
Clint, could you please
turn up that air conditioning, to the maximum?
That ice sculpture over there
is by the renowned artist Arthur Nudzac
and it's melting already.
(rattling, hissing)
What's that?
We just blew out the compressor.
Just don't stand there. Please, call a repairman.
! . Frasier... Frasier
You've got to let these people in.
Yes, Roz, I'm sorry. I know it's warm...
No, it's not the heat.
That truck that just crashed was full of cattle.
Well, the sound of gentle mooing in the background
might lend a pastoral effect.
Cattle, Frasier.
Large, undiapered cattle
that just heard a cannon go off.
Oh, all right, I'll handle this.
Uh, wedding guests,
we thank you for your cooperation
and your patience...
People, please, please.
Okay, here are your pills.
Twice a day.
And you feel better, Mr. Kitty-Cat.
(screeching)
? . Who's next
I am.
Oh, gosh.
NILES: Um, actually,
we have an emergency here.
Our dog swallowed a ring
and it's holding up a whole wedding.
Go ahead. I can wait.
Thank you so much.
Thank you.
Boy, no easy cases today.
Talk about hitting the ground running.
Is this your first day?
Yep. I'm not i n Kansas anymore.
Where'd you go to vet school?
Kansas.
All right. Here we go.
Hold his mouth open.
I'll see if I can get his paw down his throat.
I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.
Why don't I just take your pooch
. to the other room here and I'll be right back
Excuse me. Thank you. All right, buddy.
Thank you. Thank you.
He has no idea what he's doing.
He's just new at this. He's nervous.
I've been a bit nervous meself lately.
Ever since me brothers showed up.
Really? Why?
Well, you know, the way they keep
patting my stomach and saying
" . "He's a Moon all right
Oh, my God, yes.
And every time they say that,
all I can think is what if he's not?
What if he's like you and Frasier?
Excuse me?
A Moon boy I know how to handle.
But what if he'? a little genius,
teasing me in Frensix? by the time he's
I've been worried he's going to turn out
Iike one of your brothers.
I was sure when he kicked that speaker off your belly
that you had a little Simon in there.
They are a handful, my brothers.
I can just imagine the hell they're raising back there.
With an open bar?
Oh, my God!
My water just broke. The baby's coming.
Because I said "open bar"?
Oh!
All right, okay, all right.
Don't, don't panic.
There's plenty of time to get you to a hospital.
The hell there is! He's coming right now.
Here's your ring.
Call an ambulance. My wife's having a baby.
There's no time for an ambulance.
(gasping)
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
You know what? You call 91 1,
and I'll just get started here.
Wait, wait, wait.
I'm going to wash my hands.
(gasping)
Are you sure you know what you're doing?
Oh, I've assisted in many deliveries, ma'am.
One just took blue rib bon at the Kansas State Fair.
Oh, my God!
Easy now. You' re doing great, girI.
Don't call me that! I'm not a bloody poodle.
Yes, hello, hello.
We're at... We're at 1206 East Village Road.
My wife's gone into labor.
They say the hospital is 20 miles away.
Can you make it if I drive you?
(yells)
She says no.
All right, they're on their wa They're on their way.
Now you just calm down. Focus on me and breathe.
(wheezing)
Oh, for God's sakes! Oh! Oh!
Is everything okay in here?
. We're fine
Okay. If you need any help, I'm a registered nurse.
Get the hell back in here!
Easy, girl.
Stop that!
Roz, do not open a window
until they tow that cattle truck!
. Oh, my God. It's a million degrees in here
We got to get a breeze going.
(all gagging)
Oh, my God!
Dad, Ronee, we're almost ready to start.
What's that smell?
Smell?
Congratulations, you two. Everything's just perfect.
. Sorry I can't stay
What's happening?
There's been a bit of a mishap
with a cattle truck, and the AC's out.
But no matter. Right, people?
It'll take more than that to mar our joy
in seeing these two become Mr. and Mrs. Martin Crane.
(cannon booming)
(cell phone ringing)
Hello.
Well, finally, Niles.
Stop babbling.
. Niles, you'll have to speak up
I can't hear you with that bab screaming in the backgrou...
Oh, my God!
Isn't he perfect, Dad?
He certainly is, Mom.
He's got your eyes and my chin.
He's got my hair.
Do you think so?
No, he's got my hair.
Let go, dear.
If you can part with him for just two seconds,
I should finish cleaning him up.
Of course.
We can't thank you two enough.
Oh, please.
Really. If there's ever anything that we can do for you.
You can do me one quick favor.
My Jason is kinda overdue for his lunch.
Of course.
Hello? Niles?
Boy, some day, huh?
Getting married and meeting my grandson
all in the same afternoon.
Hey, you guys, you're just in time.
Come on in.
Don't stare.
You were no prize at that age either.
Oh, look who's her e. Hello.
Here we go.
Oh, my God. He's beautiful.
That twin's gonna be jealous his whole life.
Your ambulance should be here any minute,
so I think I'm going to go.
All right. Here. Thank you again.
You sure you don't want me to check your monkey?
Yeah, I'm sure.
Congratulations.
Thank you. Thank you.
Hey there, you.
I'm the one who's gonna spoil you rotten.
You're so sweet to come down,
but what about your wedding, all those people?
Ah, they'll keep.
Yeah, as long as there's an open bar.
Ooh! Settle down there.
(siren wailing)
I guess that's our ride.
I'm so sorry we're going to miss your wedding.
So are we.
I feel like it's me own dad getting married.
It's not going to be the same without you guys up there.
I don 't want to forget the rings.
Hey, wait a minute.
Why don't we just get married here?
We've got the rings and the preacher.
What about all the guests?
We can do it again for them later.
And at least this place only smells like a monkey.
. Well, I'm game
Get crackin', Fras.
You know, I'm gonna condense this just a bit.
I don't need that. And I don't need that.
Ah. "It was the great thinker Horace Walpole... "
Don't need that.
Well, all right then. Uh...
Dearly beloved...
Someone call for an ambulance?
Just a couple of seconds, please.
Niles, why don't you give them the rings?
Cut to the chase here.
Do you, Martin Crane, take Ronee Lawrence
to be your lawfully wedded wife,
forsaking all others until death do you part?
I do.
Do you, Ronee Lawrence, take Martin Crane...
I do.
. Oh, I'm tearing up
If they'd let me say what I planned to,
you'd be bawling your eyes out right now.
By the power vested in me,
I now pronounce you man and wife.
NILES: Yay!
(applause)
We're ready now.
We're so happy for you both.
Congratulations.
And you will always remember your anniversary
because it's the same day as your grandson's birthday.
Yeah, and Eddie's.
What?
Never mind.
Eddie's birthday is today?
So that's how you came up with May 15th for the hotel?
Uh...
I knew it.
And you've been blaming the inn all this time.
You are so busted.
That was a short honeymoon.
Hello, Lilith. Hey. It's me.
Yeah, listen, I was just calling to check out how Freddy's doing.
What? A new one?
I thought he was smitten with the old one.
Well, you know, he gets that from me.
Back in my heyday,
I had a new chess coach every month.
Well, I'm spending a lot of time alone lately.
Oh, you know, Dad and Ronee are still on their honeymoon.
Oh, yes, they thank you for that very thoughtful
radon detector you sent.
Not seeing much of Niles and Daphne either
because they're so busy with the baby.
Oh, sorry to keep you.
Just tell Freddy to call me.
Okay, bye, Lilith.
(doorbell rings)
Oh.
Here to pick up a chair.
It's right there.
Sorry I'm late. It's all right.
Been waiting long?
1 1 years.
Be careful with it.
(sighs)
Bebe, hi. It's Frasier.
Listen, about that San Francisco job.
I think I'll take it.
? . Have you heard anything, Frasier?About what
The new station manager they're announcing today.
My stomach is in knots.
I just know they're going to replace
sweet, kind-hearted Kenny with some ruthless, draconian...
Hard ass.
That would hardly make up for it.
Frasier.
Bebe. Oh...
I'll let you know if I hear anything, guys.
It's done.
When destiny calls, Bebe calls back
and screws destiny to the wall.
Yes, yes, yes. Shh. I don't want anyone to find out.
I'm not telling my family until this evening.
I'm so proud of you.
Bebe, listen, I have something for you.
I've decided to give away some of the things
I've accumulated through the years.
Sort of a fresh start, you know.
. My baby's all grown up
I look in your eyes and I see something there
that I've never seen before.
Wisdom?
Crow's feet.
Sorry, darling, but you're going to be on TV now.
I talked to my face man. He can see you at 4:00.
Well, thanks, Bebe, but, no.
I'm not talking surgery, just a little tweaking.
20 minutes. I've used him for years.
And I'm sure he's very good at what he does,
but still it's just...
I'm done next door, so I'll be in the car, Mom.
4:00 it is.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Bye.
You heard something, didn't you?
Yeah.
Roz, are you all right? Of course not.
She's ashen with terror. Spit it out, Roz.
Who's the jack-booted tyrant
whose fanny I'll be kissing till God knows when?
Me.
Joyful news, Your Majesty.
You?
Roz, congratulatio ns. Aren't you excited?
I don't know. I... It just hasn't sunk in yet.
That's understandable.
I remember when I heard that my advice
... would be heard by millions of people
It just sunk in! I'm the boss!
Who wants to go have champagne?
Oh, gosh, Roz, I'd love to,
but I have to go to a doctor's appointment.
Can you come to my place for dinner tonight?
Sure.
I'm so happy for you. I'm just so excited.
(breathing heavily)
Well, was that worth waiting for?
He asked you a question, Roz.
Bebe, it's Frasier.
When you get this, call me please.
I want to thank you for sending me
to that quack of yours today.
He screwed something up and now my eyes won't stop watering.
There she is.
Congratulations.
And to you.
Hey, does anyone know what this big occasion is?
We had plans and Frasier made us cancel.
We're not sure either.
He said he had some sort of an announcement to make.
Hey, Roz.
Aw, there he is.
Oh!
Hey, David...
Remember me? I'm your grandpa.
Yes, and I'm your...
Sorry. I just... I can't say it yet.
Frasier, I brought some champagne if...
Were you just crying?
No. No, Roz, of course not.
Could you take these out for me?
Sure. Thank you.
Is Frasier okay?
Sure. Why?
Well, I think he was crying in the kitchen.
I hope he's okay.
He's been to the doctor an awful lot lately.
Has he?
Yeah. He went today. And he missed a whole show
because of an appointment last week.
He hasn't said anything to us.
Ronee,
I saw you admiring this china pattern.
Oh, yeah, it's beautiful.
Well, I'd like to make a gift of them to you.
There's a complete set.
Gosh, Frasier.
Thank you.
Oh, Niles...
I know how much you've always coveted
this chess set.
I want you to have it.
But this is your favorite.
This is the one you learned on.
Which is why I want it to be the set
that you teach that son of yours to play on.
I haven't forgotten about you, Roz.
I'll be right back.
I don't like this.
Well, now let' s not get alarmed.
Marriage in the air and a new baby...
it's just brought out his sentimental side.
(telephone rings)
(over answering machine): Frasier, it's Dr. Hanning.
I'm really sorry about your results.
I know it doesn't look good,
but I'm going to do everything l can for you.
Call me.
(beep)
Oh, my God.
You think that's why he brought us all here tonight?
Here we are, Roz.
I thought this art deco mirror seemed like you.
(cries)
That just shows you.
I thought I'd get the bigger reaction from the chess set.
Frasier, what' s going on here?
Yeah, giving all your stuff away...
you're not going anywhere, are you?
Well, I didn't want to say anything until after dinner,
so as not to bring down the party, but...
(groans)
I see you're all ahead of me.
Listen, a couple of weeks ago I got some unexpected news.
(sobs)
Now, you see, this is exactly what I was trying to avoid.
You mustn't think of my leaving you as a sad thing,
because I don't.
I think of it as an adventure.
(cries): Oh, Frasier, no...
Look, we all knew we weren't going to stay together forever.
That's not what life is about.
Cry if you must, but I assure you
when I pass through that Golden Gate, I will be smiling.
.. (choked up): Golden gate.
Yes.
That's where I'm moving to, San Francisco.
What?
My new job.
I start next week.
Now don't just sit there choking back the tears.
Go ahead. Let them out.
I can't believe it! (laughing)
To San Francisco.
You know, it's just an hour by plane,
so I'll be coming back up as often as you like.
Oh, we know, Fras. Don't worry about us.
We're happy for you.
I'm happy for myself...
and scared, too. But it's a good scared.
Sort of the way I felt when I came here from Boston.
But if I hadn't done that,
. just look at what I would've missed out on
And...
Iook what I would've missed out on.
God, they are so beautiful.
And they'll stay like that
as long as she keeps breast-feeding.
Niles, could you take the baby? I need to get a blanket.
Sure.
. This is pretty comfortable. I would've been okay with this
Let me just help you with some of those dishes.
Oh, handsome boy.
Yes.
And to think I had myself all worked up
worrying that we would have nothing in common.
Oh, I've been there, Niles.
It all works out.
Well, Marty, we better get going.
I got a crazy morning.
Me, too. I've got a 7:30 meeting
and then I've got to fire someone.
Who?
Whoever scheduled the 7:30 meeting.
We should go, too, honey.
If you really must go, all right,
but I'll tell you what.
Don't go without taking some of these eclairs with you.
I'm on TV next week.
The only thing worse than them go to waste
would be seeing them go to my waist.
(chuckles)
What?
It just hit me. You're really leaving.
What will I ever do without you?
You're the sweetest, most wonderful...
It's okay, Roz. He's not going till next week.
Let her talk, Dad.
You've always been just like a brother to me.
Which is weird, I know, because we slept together,
but... well, you know.
Oh, move over, Roz.
You know how many operas I'm going to get dragged to
now you're not around?
I promise I'll fly up for all the German ones.
And he'll be here for Christmas and Thanksgiving and birthdays.
We'll be sick of this guy. Dad's right.
Once I'm gone, there'? I be no getting rid of me.
(chuckles)
Thank you, Frasier,
for... well, you know.
Go get 'em, kid. Sure.
You already made me cry once tonight.
That's quite enough.
Right. Coffee tomorrow?
10:30.
I'll miss the coffees.
Now, look...
you all know how I feel about you.
The only reason I'm leaving is because
I want what all of you have now, a new chapter.
Who knows if it'll even work out?
But it's like that Tennyson po Mom had us recite for you
when we were kids. You remember?
I think we're about to.
"It may be the gulfs will wash us down,
"It may be we shall touch the happy isles,
"And though we are not now that strength
"which in old days moved earth and heaven,
"That which we are, we are...
"...Made weak by time and fate,
"but strong in will
"To strive, to seek, to find,
and not to yield. "
I've been thinking about that poem a lot lately.
And I think what it says
is that while it's tempting to play it safe,
the more we're willing to risk the more alive we are.
In the end, what we regret most
are the chances we never took.
And I hope that explains, at least a little,
this journey on which I'm about to embark.
I have loved every minute
with my KACL family and all of you.
For 1 1 years you've heard me say, "I'm listening. "
Well, you were listening, too.
And for that I am eternally grateful.
Good night, Seattle.
We had a big party that nigh t. It was all very sweet.
(small thud)
What was that?
Oh, good heavens.
We've touched down.
Already?
Well, thank you so much. I've never had an easier flight.
And I've never had m ore delightful company.
I think it's great what you're doing.
it Well, I just know I'd always regret
if I didn't take the chance.
FLIGHT A TTENDANT: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Chicago.
Wish me luck.