1
00:00:09,344 --> 00:00:12,555
So I decided it was time I got to know
some of my colleagues in the media.
2
00:00:12,639 --> 00:00:14,141
-But a convention?
-Mm.
3
00:00:14,349 --> 00:00:15,975
You've never shown any interest before.
4
00:00:16,059 --> 00:00:18,061
They've never held one in Aspen before.
5
00:00:18,394 --> 00:00:22,940
Just think, hundreds of radio
psychiatrists, all in the same location.
6
00:00:23,107 --> 00:00:24,400
One well-timed avalanche
7
00:00:24,567 --> 00:00:28,320
and the dignity of the entire
psychiatric profession could be restored.
8
00:00:29,238 --> 00:00:30,656
[LAUGHS]
9
00:00:30,865 --> 00:00:32,867
Oh, good one.
10
00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:35,911
I can always count on
you for some witty retort.
11
00:00:36,078 --> 00:00:37,579
I insult you, and you compliment me.
12
00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:39,665
Could the request for
a favor be far behind?
13
00:00:39,749 --> 00:00:41,667
Damn. You are perceptive.
14
00:00:41,876 --> 00:00:44,170
-Oh, stop it.
-Oh, all right.
15
00:00:44,336 --> 00:00:47,836
Listen, Niles, I'd like you to do my
show for me for the week I'm gone.
16
00:00:48,215 --> 00:00:50,176
Me standing in for you?
17
00:00:50,342 --> 00:00:52,678
I'm sorry, Frasier, I
couldn't presume to fill
18
00:00:52,845 --> 00:00:54,763
those big, floppy red shoes of yours.
19
00:00:56,097 --> 00:00:58,433
Please, please, Niles.
Look, I'm begging you.
20
00:00:58,850 --> 00:01:01,352
The station wants to replace
me with Helen Grogan,
21
00:01:01,519 --> 00:01:03,771
better known as Ma Nature.
She does a gardening show,
22
00:01:03,855 --> 00:01:07,483
and I'm just a little worried that a
week of discussing well-rotted manure
23
00:01:07,567 --> 00:01:09,611
will weaken my listener base.
24
00:01:10,445 --> 00:01:12,572
It hasn't yet.
25
00:01:14,449 --> 00:01:15,700
Very well.
26
00:01:15,867 --> 00:01:19,537
You leave me no alternative
but to call in my marker.
27
00:01:22,248 --> 00:01:24,167
What marker?
28
00:01:25,001 --> 00:01:27,337
Oh, I think you know.
29
00:01:28,922 --> 00:01:30,840
-You wouldn't.
-I would.
30
00:01:31,006 --> 00:01:32,090
-You can't.
-I will.
31
00:01:32,257 --> 00:01:33,675
That was three years ago.
32
00:01:33,884 --> 00:01:36,553
I don't recall there being
any statute of limitations.
33
00:01:37,763 --> 00:01:40,890
I distinctly recall that when you
asked me to go out with Maris' sister,
34
00:01:40,974 --> 00:01:44,812
you said that you would
owe me one forever.
35
00:01:45,813 --> 00:01:48,690
But you only spent one evening with Brie.
36
00:01:49,441 --> 00:01:52,191
That hardly compares to what
you're asking me to endure.
37
00:01:52,653 --> 00:01:55,113
Shall I refresh your memory?
38
00:01:56,698 --> 00:02:01,745
Midway through the opera, her
ermine muff began to tremble.
39
00:02:01,912 --> 00:02:03,455
As it turned out, she had used it
40
00:02:03,539 --> 00:02:06,500
to smuggle in her adorably
incontinent Chihuahua.
41
00:02:07,333 --> 00:02:09,877
Just as I thought we'd reached
the low point of the evening,
42
00:02:09,961 --> 00:02:14,257
I suddenly felt a sandpaper
tongue licking my earlobe.
43
00:02:14,423 --> 00:02:18,094
Alas, it did not belong to little Hervé.
44
00:02:20,054 --> 00:02:24,767
Fortunately, my shriek coincided
with the onstage murder of Gondalfo.
45
00:02:26,519 --> 00:02:29,438
Roz will expect you on Monday at 2:00.
46
00:02:30,565 --> 00:02:33,818
For your information, Brie had a
very tough row to hoe growing up.
47
00:02:33,985 --> 00:02:37,572
It's not easy going through
life with only one nostril.
48
00:02:39,949 --> 00:02:42,827
Did I mention she had a cold that night?
49
00:02:46,621 --> 00:02:49,332
Monday at 2:00 it is.
50
00:02:54,588 --> 00:02:57,089
WOMAN: We're at the point where
all communication has broken down.
51
00:02:57,173 --> 00:02:58,841
-He won't even listen to me.
-Linda.
52
00:02:58,925 --> 00:03:01,425
Do you how annoying
that is, not to be listened to?
53
00:03:01,511 --> 00:03:03,263
-Linda.
-It's driving me crazy.
54
00:03:03,430 --> 00:03:06,766
I was hoping maybe you
would speak to him directly.
55
00:03:06,933 --> 00:03:08,184
Excuse me one moment.
56
00:03:09,060 --> 00:03:12,355
Thank you for the brilliant job of
call-screening. How do I get out of this?
57
00:03:12,439 --> 00:03:15,817
Did you think of saying there
are other callers on the line?
58
00:03:16,109 --> 00:03:18,359
Linda, I'd love to go
into this in more depth,
59
00:03:18,445 --> 00:03:20,403
but, unfortunately,
we're nearly out of time
60
00:03:20,487 --> 00:03:23,406
and Roz has lots of other callers
waiting anxiously on the line.
61
00:03:23,490 --> 00:03:26,327
Actually, Dr Crane,
all our lines are open.
62
00:03:27,620 --> 00:03:29,538
So you can talk to him? Good.
63
00:03:29,747 --> 00:03:31,414
I'm putting him on the line right now.
64
00:03:31,498 --> 00:03:33,584
-Go ahead.
-All right.
65
00:03:34,001 --> 00:03:35,669
Murray, you're dealing with your problem
66
00:03:35,753 --> 00:03:37,379
in a very self-destructive manner.
67
00:03:37,463 --> 00:03:39,798
It won't be solved by refusing to eat.
68
00:03:39,965 --> 00:03:41,592
Do you hear me?
69
00:03:41,759 --> 00:03:43,427
[CAT MEOWS OVER PHONE]
70
00:03:44,887 --> 00:03:47,222
Oh, my God, it's working. He's eating.
71
00:03:47,389 --> 00:03:49,725
Dr Crane, what did you say to him?
72
00:03:49,892 --> 00:03:54,188
Well, I'd like to tell you, but that
would violate doctor-cat confidentiality.
73
00:03:54,605 --> 00:03:56,730
Oh, well, Seattle, I'm
afraid we're out of time.
74
00:03:56,814 --> 00:04:00,610
This is Dr Niles Crane, one
down, four to go. See you tomorrow.
75
00:04:02,779 --> 00:04:05,114
That little bit of sabotage
was not amusing.
76
00:04:05,323 --> 00:04:07,575
Then why did coffee come out of my nose?
77
00:04:10,495 --> 00:04:13,915
Hey, Dr Dolittle, I heard your show.
78
00:04:14,082 --> 00:04:17,251
-It didn't suck.
-"Dear diary…"
79
00:04:17,418 --> 00:04:18,670
So how's it feel?
80
00:04:19,629 --> 00:04:21,529
Like I'm walking away from my lamppost
81
00:04:21,631 --> 00:04:23,967
and counting the bills in my garter belt.
82
00:04:24,175 --> 00:04:25,635
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
83
00:04:25,802 --> 00:04:28,470
Okay, both of you get out of here.
I gotta set up for my show.
84
00:04:28,554 --> 00:04:31,724
I got Reggie MacLemore on my show today.
Don't ask me why.
85
00:04:31,933 --> 00:04:34,767
-I wasn't even going to ask who.
-He's a guard for the Sonics.
86
00:04:34,851 --> 00:04:37,501
He used to be unstoppable.
Twenty points a game, easy.
87
00:04:37,646 --> 00:04:38,981
Now he's in the tank.
88
00:04:39,189 --> 00:04:41,108
Just what I need on my show, a loser.
89
00:04:41,274 --> 00:04:42,776
Oh, look, there he is now.
90
00:04:42,943 --> 00:04:44,777
What an overpaid, worthless piece of…
91
00:04:44,861 --> 00:04:49,449
-Hey, Reggie, my man!
-What's up? How you doing, man?
92
00:04:49,992 --> 00:04:52,827
You never call me unless you need
tickets, man. What's up with that?
93
00:04:52,911 --> 00:04:54,371
[YELLS]
94
00:04:54,538 --> 00:04:55,998
I love this guy.
95
00:04:56,957 --> 00:04:59,209
Reggie MacLemore, Roz Doyle.
96
00:04:59,376 --> 00:05:02,421
-Hi. I'm a big fan of yours.
-Thanks.
97
00:05:02,629 --> 00:05:05,882
I'd introduce you to this guy, but
he doesn't know squat about sports.
98
00:05:05,966 --> 00:05:08,718
On the contrary.
In prep school, I was an ardent sportsman.
99
00:05:08,802 --> 00:05:12,513
Until an inflamed instep forced
me to resign from the croquet club.
100
00:05:15,766 --> 00:05:17,601
I'll see myself out.
101
00:05:17,768 --> 00:05:19,603
Oh, hey, wait a minute. You're the shrink.
102
00:05:19,687 --> 00:05:21,731
I heard you in my car on the way over.
103
00:05:21,897 --> 00:05:23,691
Dr Niles Crane. It's a pleasure.
104
00:05:23,899 --> 00:05:26,818
Doc, wait. You sounded like you
really know what you're talking about.
105
00:05:26,902 --> 00:05:29,196
Anyway, there's this sort
of problem I've been having,
106
00:05:29,280 --> 00:05:31,490
and I was wondering…
Maybe you could help me out.
107
00:05:31,574 --> 00:05:32,742
Well, what is it?
108
00:05:33,159 --> 00:05:35,619
Well, you see, for the last two weeks,
109
00:05:35,786 --> 00:05:39,331
every time I get my
hands on the pill, I choke.
110
00:05:40,166 --> 00:05:43,544
Well, have you tried
mashing it with a spoon?
111
00:05:44,295 --> 00:05:46,337
You don't watch much basketball, do you?
112
00:05:46,504 --> 00:05:49,549
It's my game, man.
Because of me, we've lost six in a row.
113
00:05:50,008 --> 00:05:52,635
Oh, well, I'm not very well
versed in sports psychology,
114
00:05:52,719 --> 00:05:54,720
but I could certainly schedule a session.
115
00:05:54,804 --> 00:05:57,974
No, no, I need something fast, man.
We got Phoenix tonight.
116
00:05:58,266 --> 00:06:00,434
This is highly irregular,
but since you're pressed,
117
00:06:00,518 --> 00:06:02,061
there are exercises I could suggest.
118
00:06:02,145 --> 00:06:03,437
Oh, great, man. Thanks, man.
119
00:06:03,521 --> 00:06:05,940
You know what, just name it.
Tickets to any game you want.
120
00:06:06,024 --> 00:06:08,610
Nothing wrong with your sense of humor.
Have a seat.
121
00:06:10,612 --> 00:06:12,864
We'll start with a positive visualization.
122
00:06:13,031 --> 00:06:15,617
I want you to close your
eyes, take a deep breath.
123
00:06:15,784 --> 00:06:17,786
[INHALES, EXHALES]
124
00:06:17,994 --> 00:06:21,914
Good. Now, I want you to imagine
yourself on the playing surface,
125
00:06:22,081 --> 00:06:24,958
doing whatever it is you actually do.
126
00:06:25,125 --> 00:06:26,752
Tell me what you see.
127
00:06:26,919 --> 00:06:30,089
-Okay. Kemp's passing me the ball.
-Mm-hmm.
128
00:06:30,255 --> 00:06:32,299
-I'm bringing it up court.
-Mm-hmm.
129
00:06:32,466 --> 00:06:35,066
-I'm dribbling.
-Don't worry about your appearance.
130
00:06:37,179 --> 00:06:38,979
Start again, and I'll just be quiet.
131
00:06:40,849 --> 00:06:43,894
-Can I ask you a favor?
-Yeah, forget it, he's married.
132
00:06:44,061 --> 00:06:46,271
Hey, that's pretty offensive.
133
00:06:46,438 --> 00:06:48,440
Why do you assume that's what I wanted?
134
00:06:48,607 --> 00:06:50,818
Okay, then, what did you want?
135
00:06:50,984 --> 00:06:52,610
Well, I don't know, I just wanted to…
136
00:06:52,694 --> 00:06:53,737
[HORN HONKS]
137
00:06:53,904 --> 00:06:54,988
Time's up.
138
00:06:55,197 --> 00:06:59,200
Oh, by the way, if you're so hungry
for some good-looking, athletic guy,
139
00:06:59,367 --> 00:07:01,035
why won't you go out with me?
140
00:07:01,369 --> 00:07:04,872
If you're not at least this
tall, you can't go on this ride.
141
00:07:07,333 --> 00:07:09,877
This next exercise is designed
to block negative feelings.
142
00:07:09,961 --> 00:07:12,296
I've tried it myself.
Simply take a moment,
143
00:07:12,505 --> 00:07:15,007
think of something
comforting from childhood:
144
00:07:15,174 --> 00:07:18,344
A stuffed animal, a dog-eared
copy of Middle march.
145
00:07:19,804 --> 00:07:21,556
You may have other memories.
146
00:07:21,764 --> 00:07:23,099
Come on, Reggie, shake it.
147
00:07:23,307 --> 00:07:26,101
I gotta run. Hey, but thanks a lot, Doc.
I'll give it a try.
148
00:07:26,185 --> 00:07:29,897
Okay. Oh, wait, I saw this.
It has steps, right?
149
00:07:32,066 --> 00:07:34,026
Later, man.
150
00:07:35,235 --> 00:07:36,403
[CHEERING ON TV]
151
00:07:36,570 --> 00:07:39,113
-You know, according to this article…
-No, quiet.
152
00:07:39,197 --> 00:07:42,993
That's three seconds.
Come on, he's camping out in the middle.
153
00:07:43,201 --> 00:07:46,663
No, don't double the ball.
They'll just swing it around for a three.
154
00:07:47,164 --> 00:07:49,666
There it is. Just like I said.
155
00:07:49,875 --> 00:07:51,585
Oh!
156
00:07:52,586 --> 00:07:55,964
Oh, timeout. Sure, now you listen to me.
157
00:07:57,174 --> 00:07:59,592
You believe this?
Two minutes ago, we were up six points…
158
00:07:59,676 --> 00:08:02,304
Shh! Quiet.
This is my favorite commercial.
159
00:08:03,597 --> 00:08:08,226
No, don't pick that floor cleaner.
It'll give your floors waxy build-up.
160
00:08:08,435 --> 00:08:11,896
No, don't do it. Don't do it! Dahh!
161
00:08:15,149 --> 00:08:16,609
It's completely different.
162
00:08:16,775 --> 00:08:18,068
[DOORBELL RINGS]
163
00:08:18,235 --> 00:08:19,403
There's Dr Crane.
164
00:08:19,570 --> 00:08:23,782
It'll be a pleasure to be around one
man who's not obsessed with sports.
165
00:08:25,075 --> 00:08:26,368
-Hello, Daphne.
-Hello.
166
00:08:26,535 --> 00:08:28,370
Oh, the Sonics are on, excuse me.
167
00:08:28,537 --> 00:08:30,080
-So, Dad…
-Hold it, Niles.
168
00:08:30,247 --> 00:08:31,748
There's only nine seconds to go.
169
00:08:31,832 --> 00:08:33,542
-What's the score?
-What do you care?
170
00:08:33,626 --> 00:08:35,293
No, get it to MacLemore, to MacLemore.
171
00:08:35,377 --> 00:08:36,754
He's got the hot hand.
172
00:08:37,129 --> 00:08:39,089
Yes! Come on, Reggie!
173
00:08:39,298 --> 00:08:42,134
Unbelievable. Sonics win!
174
00:08:42,343 --> 00:08:45,554
-This is fantastic. You know, Dad…
-Wait, wait. I wanna see the replay.
175
00:08:45,638 --> 00:08:47,597
No, get it to MacLemore.
176
00:08:47,805 --> 00:08:49,515
Unbelievable!
177
00:08:51,768 --> 00:08:54,645
-You might be interested to know…
-Quiet, I wanna see the interview.
178
00:08:54,729 --> 00:08:56,105
REPORTER [ON TV]: Reggie, got a minute?
179
00:08:56,189 --> 00:08:58,607
Great game tonight.
Seems like your slump is over.
180
00:08:58,691 --> 00:09:00,693
Yeah, I was really
feeling it out there tonight.
181
00:09:00,777 --> 00:09:02,904
What turned it around for you?
182
00:09:03,238 --> 00:09:05,865
Well, I was having a little
problem getting my head together,
183
00:09:05,949 --> 00:09:08,659
but this radio shrink really
helped me out. Dr Niles Crane.
184
00:09:08,743 --> 00:09:11,204
-Well, good luck against Utah.
-Thanks a lot.
185
00:09:11,371 --> 00:09:12,997
Let's send it back upstairs.
186
00:09:15,250 --> 00:09:16,876
[TV CLICKS OFF]
187
00:09:17,335 --> 00:09:18,503
You?
188
00:09:18,795 --> 00:09:19,921
[LAUGHS]
189
00:09:20,088 --> 00:09:23,215
-Is that so hard to believe?
-Yeah.
190
00:09:23,715 --> 00:09:26,802
-When did you talk to him?
-He was on Bulldog's show today.
191
00:09:27,010 --> 00:09:29,846
We had a brief session in the hallway.
Not more than two minutes.
192
00:09:29,930 --> 00:09:32,557
You turned Reggie's game
around in only two minutes?
193
00:09:32,724 --> 00:09:34,601
Well, you could be
a little less surprised.
194
00:09:34,685 --> 00:09:36,728
I am a skilled psychiatrist.
195
00:09:36,895 --> 00:09:40,899
After 16 years in the field, I
have developed certain instincts.
196
00:09:41,108 --> 00:09:42,901
I gotta say, I'm impressed.
197
00:09:43,110 --> 00:09:45,570
DAPHNE: I'm starting to think
maybe I should spend an hour or two
198
00:09:45,654 --> 00:09:47,906
on the couch with you.
199
00:09:48,865 --> 00:09:51,615
Are you kidding?
With Niles, it'd only take two minutes.
200
00:09:57,791 --> 00:09:59,709
Thanks, Dad.
201
00:10:03,462 --> 00:10:05,631
HOOPLA
202
00:10:05,798 --> 00:10:07,717
-[PHONE RINGS]
-[FOOTSTEPS]
203
00:10:07,967 --> 00:10:10,553
Hey, Doc, great job. Go Sonics.
204
00:10:10,720 --> 00:10:14,181
-You're the man.
-Thank you. Same to you.
205
00:10:14,432 --> 00:10:16,225
[MOUTHING] Way to go.
206
00:10:16,517 --> 00:10:18,978
Heavens, I need a clip and a buff.
207
00:10:21,188 --> 00:10:23,274
There he is, the toast of Seattle.
208
00:10:23,482 --> 00:10:26,526
You know you made the sports
section of the paper this morning?
209
00:10:26,610 --> 00:10:30,114
Yes, I'd heard. I must admit,
I find this all a bit mystifying.
210
00:10:30,281 --> 00:10:32,783
Do people really care this
much about a basketball game?
211
00:10:32,867 --> 00:10:35,952
Are you kidding? This is Seattle.
It rains nine months out of the year.
212
00:10:36,036 --> 00:10:38,330
We take our indoor sports very seriously.
213
00:10:38,538 --> 00:10:40,665
Well, I know you always have.
214
00:10:42,250 --> 00:10:45,128
You're a hero today, so
I'm gonna let that one go.
215
00:10:45,337 --> 00:10:48,840
Pucker up, baby, I'm
planting a big, wet one on you.
216
00:10:49,132 --> 00:10:51,009
Mwah!
217
00:10:52,218 --> 00:10:56,431
Well, there's a layer of skin
I'll be exfoliating this evening.
218
00:10:57,682 --> 00:11:02,020
-I had 200 bucks on the Sonics.
-Two hundred? Isn't gambling illegal?
219
00:11:02,187 --> 00:11:03,855
-Isn't he the cutest?
-Oh, yes.
220
00:11:04,481 --> 00:11:05,857
-Down. Down.
-Okay.
221
00:11:06,024 --> 00:11:08,025
I hope you don't feel
this way about chicks.
222
00:11:08,109 --> 00:11:10,778
I got one of those Sonics
cheerleaders coming on my show today,
223
00:11:10,862 --> 00:11:12,462
and she really wants to see you.
224
00:11:12,613 --> 00:11:15,407
Believe it or not, Bulldog,
not every man's dream woman
225
00:11:15,616 --> 00:11:18,702
is a pompom-shaking, half-time halfwit.
226
00:11:18,911 --> 00:11:20,496
Is she the head cheerleader?
227
00:11:21,121 --> 00:11:23,832
Yeah, and she's coming in costume.
228
00:11:24,041 --> 00:11:26,502
Of course she is. It's radio.
229
00:11:29,880 --> 00:11:31,506
Look at these faxes that came for you.
230
00:11:31,590 --> 00:11:33,342
Faxes?
231
00:11:34,093 --> 00:11:36,345
"Seattle thanks you."
232
00:11:37,388 --> 00:11:40,599
"You're the Sonics' MVP."
233
00:11:40,808 --> 00:11:43,018
-Most valuable player.
-Oh!
234
00:11:45,270 --> 00:11:46,563
"You're a genius."
235
00:11:46,730 --> 00:11:50,080
With the less-common J spelling.
But still, his point is well taken.
236
00:11:50,441 --> 00:11:52,735
I bet you're feeling
pretty good about yourself.
237
00:11:52,819 --> 00:11:55,362
Suddenly I'm being revered as
a god by the same troglodytes
238
00:11:55,446 --> 00:11:58,615
who in junior high school tried
to pack me into my own briefcase.
239
00:11:58,699 --> 00:12:00,576
It's glorious.
240
00:12:00,785 --> 00:12:02,703
Oh, I almost forgot the best part.
241
00:12:03,037 --> 00:12:06,207
Reggie sent these tickets
for tonight's game over.
242
00:12:06,624 --> 00:12:09,252
Well, I suppose I can't
disappoint my new fans.
243
00:12:09,419 --> 00:12:11,569
Tell me, does one still
wear a white sweater
244
00:12:11,671 --> 00:12:13,589
jauntily tied around the
neck to these things?
245
00:12:13,673 --> 00:12:16,801
If one wants to get the
crap beat out of one.
246
00:12:18,636 --> 00:12:21,222
-Hey.
-Dad. What a surprise.
247
00:12:21,431 --> 00:12:23,182
I'm not interrupting or anything, am I?
248
00:12:23,266 --> 00:12:25,683
-No, come in. Is everything all right?
-Oh, sure, sure.
249
00:12:25,767 --> 00:12:27,477
I was just having lunch at McGinty's,
250
00:12:27,561 --> 00:12:29,687
and some of the guys
would really like to meet you,
251
00:12:29,771 --> 00:12:32,732
and I was hoping that after your
show, you could stop in for a drink.
252
00:12:32,816 --> 00:12:36,403
I mean, I wouldn't ask you, but some
of these guys are my best buddies.
253
00:12:36,611 --> 00:12:39,280
Actually, Dad, Reggie sent over
these tickets to tonight's game,
254
00:12:39,364 --> 00:12:41,449
and I was going to ask
you to go, but since…
255
00:12:41,533 --> 00:12:44,077
The hell with those guys. I'm there.
256
00:12:44,703 --> 00:12:47,789
I have to tell you, I'm finding all
this attention a bit overwhelming.
257
00:12:47,873 --> 00:12:51,126
Oh, come on, you deserve it.
You're a hero.
258
00:12:51,334 --> 00:12:53,461
Perhaps it's time we put
all this into perspective.
259
00:12:53,545 --> 00:12:55,588
The only real heroes are the fine athletes
260
00:12:55,672 --> 00:12:57,799
who worked so hard for
two hours to win that game.
261
00:12:57,883 --> 00:12:59,683
My contribution was minimal at best.
262
00:13:00,051 --> 00:13:01,427
What did I tell you, Doc?
263
00:13:01,594 --> 00:13:03,595
Which of you won the
game for us last night?
264
00:13:03,679 --> 00:13:05,264
That would be me.
265
00:13:08,976 --> 00:13:11,645
AY, THERE'S THE RUB
266
00:13:11,854 --> 00:13:13,189
[CHATTERING]
267
00:13:13,564 --> 00:13:16,692
Nice talking to you too. Enjoy the game.
268
00:13:17,318 --> 00:13:20,571
Dad, it really isn't necessary
to tell everyone we bump into
269
00:13:20,738 --> 00:13:24,388
[RAISED VOICE] that I'm the one
Reggie credited with last night's victory.
270
00:13:24,533 --> 00:13:28,787
-That was you?
-Yeah, yeah, it's my son, Niles Crane.
271
00:13:31,790 --> 00:13:33,333
They must've sold too many tickets.
272
00:13:33,417 --> 00:13:35,503
They've stuck us in these folding chairs.
273
00:13:35,669 --> 00:13:40,381
Wow, we're right on the
hardwood, five feet from the baseline.
274
00:13:40,673 --> 00:13:41,841
[CHUCKLES]
275
00:13:42,467 --> 00:13:46,095
-Like front-row orchestra, stage right.
-Oh.
276
00:13:46,804 --> 00:13:50,642
Oh, man, we're so close we're gonna
hear teeth rattle when they set a pick.
277
00:13:50,975 --> 00:13:52,685
[CHUCKLES]
278
00:13:52,894 --> 00:13:56,481
It's like sitting close enough to
get hit by Placido Domingo's spit.
279
00:13:56,648 --> 00:13:57,732
Oh.
280
00:13:58,650 --> 00:14:01,778
-REGGIE: Hey, hey, N.C., you made it.
-I beg your pardon?
281
00:14:01,945 --> 00:14:04,572
Oh, "N.C." I thought you said "nancy."
282
00:14:05,156 --> 00:14:08,356
For a second it was prep school
all over again. Let me introduce.
283
00:14:08,451 --> 00:14:09,994
Reggie MacLemore, Daphne Moon.
284
00:14:10,161 --> 00:14:11,329
-Hello.
-And this…
285
00:14:11,496 --> 00:14:13,830
Hi. Marty Crane. Niles' dad.
286
00:14:14,039 --> 00:14:15,290
Yeah, I'm a big fan.
287
00:14:15,457 --> 00:14:17,667
I want you to know, I
never lost faith in you.
288
00:14:17,751 --> 00:14:20,753
Not when you were in your slump,
not when you tanked it in the playoffs,
289
00:14:20,837 --> 00:14:25,050
not even when all my friends were
calling you Reggie Hack-Lemore.
290
00:14:25,717 --> 00:14:27,135
What?
291
00:14:27,302 --> 00:14:28,845
You know, this might be a good time
292
00:14:28,929 --> 00:14:31,222
to try that
negative-thought-blocking exercise.
293
00:14:31,306 --> 00:14:34,100
Yeah, okay. Look, you guys enjoy the game.
I'll see you afterwards.
294
00:14:34,184 --> 00:14:37,187
-All right. Make me proud.
-Go Sonics.
295
00:14:38,647 --> 00:14:40,482
[HORN BLOWS]
296
00:14:40,732 --> 00:14:43,318
-What the hell was that?
-That's the end of the shoot around.
297
00:14:43,402 --> 00:14:46,863
The coach is about to send
the starting five in for the tip-off.
298
00:14:47,030 --> 00:14:50,491
-The stage manager just called places.
-Oh.
299
00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:52,368
[AUDIENCE BOOS]
300
00:14:52,535 --> 00:14:53,786
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
301
00:14:53,953 --> 00:14:57,331
ANNOUNCER: Foul on the rebound, MacLemore.
302
00:14:57,498 --> 00:15:00,248
I gather Reggie's not
performing up to par this evening.
303
00:15:00,334 --> 00:15:02,085
Oh, you got that from all the booing, huh?
304
00:15:02,169 --> 00:15:05,423
Nice counseling job.
He's been throwing up bricks all night.
305
00:15:05,590 --> 00:15:07,758
Judging from that empty
tureen of nachos and cheese,
306
00:15:07,842 --> 00:15:09,802
you may be joining him.
307
00:15:10,136 --> 00:15:12,847
ANNOUNCER: Malone
to the line to shoot two.
308
00:15:13,014 --> 00:15:15,265
Doc, you gotta help me out.
I don't know what's wrong.
309
00:15:15,349 --> 00:15:17,768
Perhaps you've forgotten my advice.
Let's review quickly.
310
00:15:17,852 --> 00:15:19,895
Did you empty your
mind of negative thoughts?
311
00:15:19,979 --> 00:15:21,271
-Yeah.
-The imaging exercises?
312
00:15:21,355 --> 00:15:23,941
Yeah, yeah, I did them.
What else did you tell me to do?
313
00:15:24,025 --> 00:15:26,401
Nothing.
Bulldog called you, you ran back in.
314
00:15:26,568 --> 00:15:29,320
No, no, wait. Now, right
before that, I rubbed your head.
315
00:15:29,404 --> 00:15:31,322
I remember because my
hand smelled like peach
316
00:15:31,406 --> 00:15:34,367
and I thought, "What the hell
does this guy wash his hair with?"
317
00:15:34,451 --> 00:15:37,787
Well, you can't possibly think that
my head is some sort of lucky charm.
318
00:15:37,871 --> 00:15:40,123
Well, we'll know in a minute.
319
00:15:43,084 --> 00:15:46,087
I saw you talking to Reggie again.
Hope you gave him some more advice.
320
00:15:46,171 --> 00:15:47,922
I tried to, but he has this absurd idea…
321
00:15:48,006 --> 00:15:49,716
No, wait, wait, wait.
322
00:15:50,300 --> 00:15:51,509
[CROWD CHEERING]
323
00:15:51,676 --> 00:15:53,470
ANNOUNCER: MacLemore for three.
324
00:15:54,262 --> 00:15:56,162
Unbelievable. What did you say to him?
325
00:15:56,264 --> 00:15:58,015
I didn't say anything he could possibly…
326
00:15:58,099 --> 00:16:00,018
Look, look, look, he stole the ball.
327
00:16:00,185 --> 00:16:01,311
[CROWD CHEERING]
328
00:16:01,478 --> 00:16:03,061
ANNOUNCER: MacLemore, three more.
329
00:16:03,145 --> 00:16:05,648
Oh, Dr Crane, you're a miracle worker.
330
00:16:05,814 --> 00:16:07,358
What did you say to him?
331
00:16:07,524 --> 00:16:10,861
Oh, just something off the top of my head.
332
00:16:11,737 --> 00:16:14,531
ANNOUNCER: Timeout, Utah.
333
00:16:15,240 --> 00:16:16,659
[DOOR SHUTS]
334
00:16:18,118 --> 00:16:19,370
Oh, isn't this nice.
335
00:16:19,536 --> 00:16:21,872
Dr Crane sent us a postcard from Aspen.
336
00:16:22,039 --> 00:16:23,832
Great. How's he doing?
337
00:16:23,999 --> 00:16:25,167
Let's see.
338
00:16:25,334 --> 00:16:27,878
"I delivered a speech at
the conference last night.
339
00:16:28,087 --> 00:16:30,881
"I was especially pleased
with my opening line:"
340
00:16:31,090 --> 00:16:34,718
" 'My fellow psychiatrists.
As I watched you on the slopes today,"
341
00:16:34,885 --> 00:16:39,430
"I realized I've never seen
so many Freudians slip.' "
342
00:16:44,477 --> 00:16:46,145
"As hard as you're laughing now,"
343
00:16:46,312 --> 00:16:49,565
"imagine the thunder of an
auditorium of colleagues."
344
00:16:49,732 --> 00:16:51,901
Well, see you Saturday. Frasier."
345
00:16:52,985 --> 00:16:57,073
Well, I better get going.
I'm meeting Joe at the movies.
346
00:16:57,281 --> 00:16:59,381
Oh, bloody hell, it's
later than I thought.
347
00:16:59,534 --> 00:17:02,161
-MARTIN: Enjoy.
-Yeah. Enjoy your game.
348
00:17:02,495 --> 00:17:05,123
Oh, Dr Crane, have fun at the game.
349
00:17:05,289 --> 00:17:08,042
-I'm afraid we won't be going.
-Oh, that's too bad.
350
00:17:08,251 --> 00:17:10,101
-Do you wanna know why?
-Not really.
351
00:17:13,131 --> 00:17:15,882
MARTIN: VIP parking. Uh-huh.
352
00:17:17,217 --> 00:17:21,221
Yeah, that's courtside, pal.
Yeah, right on the hardwood.
353
00:17:21,471 --> 00:17:23,140
Yeah, swear to God.
354
00:17:23,348 --> 00:17:26,398
And Reggie said the seats are
ours for the rest of the season.
355
00:17:27,352 --> 00:17:31,148
I believe it's what
they call "living large."
356
00:17:32,733 --> 00:17:35,360
I don't know. Somewhere on TV.
357
00:17:35,569 --> 00:17:38,321
Yeah. Yeah, okay. Yeah, I gotta go. Bye.
358
00:17:38,488 --> 00:17:39,781
Let's go, Niles.
359
00:17:40,073 --> 00:17:41,908
You know, Dad, I was thinking,
360
00:17:42,075 --> 00:17:43,743
maybe we shouldn't go to the game today.
361
00:17:43,827 --> 00:17:45,829
[LAUGHS]
362
00:17:46,246 --> 00:17:49,248
Hey, you know what I was thinking?
Maybe we shouldn't go to any of them.
363
00:17:49,332 --> 00:17:52,042
[LAUGHS]
364
00:17:52,460 --> 00:17:54,586
You know, that's one of
the best things about this.
365
00:17:54,670 --> 00:17:56,963
When was the last time
you and I joked like this?
366
00:17:57,047 --> 00:17:59,508
Well, we better get
going, because it's late.
367
00:17:59,675 --> 00:18:01,469
Last night at the game…
368
00:18:01,635 --> 00:18:04,305
Did you happen to notice
when Reggie tousled my hair?
369
00:18:04,513 --> 00:18:05,765
Yeah, yeah. Let's go.
370
00:18:05,931 --> 00:18:09,852
Well, somehow, some way,
he's convinced himself that
371
00:18:10,019 --> 00:18:12,419
that's what he needs to
do in order to play well.
372
00:18:12,563 --> 00:18:14,439
Oh, well, can't we
talk about it in the car?
373
00:18:14,523 --> 00:18:16,566
It has nothing to do with
any advice I've given.
374
00:18:16,650 --> 00:18:18,486
It's all some bizarre superstition,
375
00:18:18,652 --> 00:18:22,156
and Reggie wants to rub my
head again before today's game.
376
00:18:22,615 --> 00:18:25,515
Well, you know, a lot of
athletes have weird superstitions.
377
00:18:25,618 --> 00:18:28,536
Yes, but I'm a psychiatrist.
378
00:18:29,496 --> 00:18:31,455
I can't let people think
I'm treating the man
379
00:18:31,539 --> 00:18:34,375
when all I am is a rabbit's foot.
380
00:18:34,542 --> 00:18:37,002
I'd be taking credit for
something I don't deserve.
381
00:18:37,086 --> 00:18:40,423
Okay. What would you be taking credit for?
Helping him.
382
00:18:40,632 --> 00:18:44,302
What are you doing?
Helping him. I'm getting my coat.
383
00:18:44,511 --> 00:18:47,138
But I wouldn't be helping
him as a psychiatrist.
384
00:18:47,305 --> 00:18:50,391
Oh, that's what's bugging you? People
thinking you're a good psychiatrist?
385
00:18:50,475 --> 00:18:52,309
-Exactly.
-Are you a good psychiatrist?
386
00:18:52,393 --> 00:18:54,813
-Yes.
-I'm getting my coat.
387
00:18:55,271 --> 00:18:57,732
Dad, Dad, I'm sorry.
388
00:18:58,399 --> 00:18:59,776
We're not going.
389
00:19:00,443 --> 00:19:05,614
Oh, man, I knew you'd
find some way to ruin this.
390
00:19:05,781 --> 00:19:07,115
Dad.
391
00:19:07,282 --> 00:19:10,869
Courtside season tickets. VIP parking.
392
00:19:11,036 --> 00:19:12,120
Dad.
393
00:19:12,287 --> 00:19:14,998
No, no, you've gotta have your reasons.
394
00:19:15,165 --> 00:19:20,379
"It's my ethics. It's my integrity.
It's my allergies."
395
00:19:21,171 --> 00:19:24,424
Well, that's it.
I'm never getting my hopes up again.
396
00:19:24,633 --> 00:19:26,509
Dad, you can still watch the game on TV.
397
00:19:26,593 --> 00:19:29,221
I don't wanna watch it on TV.
398
00:19:29,596 --> 00:19:32,891
-I'll get you a beer.
-I don't like beer.
399
00:19:33,809 --> 00:19:36,270
Dad, you know I'm right.
400
00:19:39,773 --> 00:19:42,942
Will you look me in the eye
and answer me one question?
401
00:19:43,234 --> 00:19:47,530
Would you still be doing this if these
were courtside seats at the opera?
402
00:19:48,906 --> 00:19:50,741
Yes.
403
00:19:51,158 --> 00:19:52,743
My ethics are my ethics.
404
00:19:52,952 --> 00:19:55,454
And by the way, where do
you think I got those ethics?
405
00:19:55,538 --> 00:19:58,416
Oh, yeah, throw it back at me.
406
00:19:58,583 --> 00:20:00,793
That's real mature.
407
00:20:08,301 --> 00:20:10,001
I'd like to talk to Mr. MacLemore.
408
00:20:10,094 --> 00:20:13,306
-Who wants to see him?
-Just tell him N.C. is here.
409
00:20:13,514 --> 00:20:16,100
Nancy?
410
00:20:19,269 --> 00:20:21,646
No, N.C.
411
00:20:25,150 --> 00:20:27,068
What is so hard about that?
412
00:20:30,196 --> 00:20:33,157
Damn, man, where've you been?
I gotta be on the court in five minutes.
413
00:20:33,241 --> 00:20:35,577
I know, I know. Stop.
414
00:20:36,411 --> 00:20:39,289
Before you rub your hands
all over me, we need to talk.
415
00:20:39,581 --> 00:20:41,666
-REGGIE: What's up?
-Well, I'll come right to the point.
416
00:20:41,750 --> 00:20:45,629
This entire affair has grown
out of control. I need to end it.
417
00:20:45,837 --> 00:20:47,922
What are you saying,
you're not coming anymore?
418
00:20:48,006 --> 00:20:49,257
Well, no.
419
00:20:49,424 --> 00:20:53,260
We can still see each
other to talk, but no touching.
420
00:20:54,929 --> 00:20:57,806
That part of our relationship is over.
421
00:20:58,557 --> 00:21:02,144
-Does this concern you?
-It's starting to.
422
00:21:03,395 --> 00:21:06,774
-All right, come on, dude.
-No. Now, listen.
423
00:21:06,941 --> 00:21:09,443
Do you really expect
me to drop what I'm doing
424
00:21:09,610 --> 00:21:10,986
and race down here every day
425
00:21:11,070 --> 00:21:14,031
just so you can run your
fingers over my head?
426
00:21:14,531 --> 00:21:16,241
Yeah.
427
00:21:17,368 --> 00:21:18,702
Listen to me closely.
428
00:21:18,911 --> 00:21:21,830
You are a gifted athlete
with tremendous skill.
429
00:21:22,081 --> 00:21:25,709
Marshal your talents. Concentrate. Focus.
430
00:21:25,876 --> 00:21:29,879
The key to your success is to
trust your own God-given ability.
431
00:21:30,088 --> 00:21:31,788
It has nothing to do with my head.
432
00:21:32,256 --> 00:21:34,550
-It must be your hair.
-Will you stop it.
433
00:21:34,717 --> 00:21:38,846
-You're obsessing.
-Come on, man, just let me touch it.
434
00:21:41,849 --> 00:21:43,434
No.
435
00:21:44,060 --> 00:21:45,728
You have to look at this logically.
436
00:21:45,812 --> 00:21:47,438
I can't come down here for every game,
437
00:21:47,522 --> 00:21:50,065
and I certainly can't go with
you when the team is on tour.
438
00:21:50,149 --> 00:21:51,943
This is not a long-term solution.
439
00:21:52,151 --> 00:21:54,070
What you need is legitimate therapy.
440
00:21:54,278 --> 00:21:55,696
If you wanna start, come inside.
441
00:21:55,780 --> 00:21:58,741
I'll give you a quick session,
we can proceed from there.
442
00:21:59,075 --> 00:22:02,578
Yeah, you're right, Doc. I mean,
what I need is a long-term solution.
443
00:22:02,787 --> 00:22:04,372
Good.
444
00:22:04,706 --> 00:22:06,832
Yo, Frank, let me see those scissors.
445
00:22:06,999 --> 00:22:09,001
Coming, Doc.