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[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
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[DOORBELL RINGS]
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Trick or treat.
4
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Or should I say "pip, pip"?
5
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What's with the outfit?
6
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This is part of your costume.
I just picked it up for you.
7
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What? You said you were getting
me a Sherlock Holmes outfit.
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-He didn't wear a bowler.
-They were out of Sherlock Holmes.
9
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I put together something else.
10
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Don't worry, it's another detective.
Tonight you'll be Lord Peter Whimsy.
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Who the hell's that?
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He's a celebrated bon vivant sleuth
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from a series of novels by Dorothy L.
Sayers.
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I'm not going anywhere where I
have to tell people my name's Whimsy.
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Oh, no, forget it.
I'm just gonna wear my old police uniform.
16
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You can't. It's a Halloween
ball for the Library Association.
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You have to go dressed as
a character from literature.
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Oh, why didn't I just tell Sherry
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I'd go with her to visit
her mother in prison?
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Come on, Dad, it'll be fun.
I'm going to go as Cyrano de Bergerac.
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Musician. Philosopher. Fighter. Poet.
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The greatest friend and
the bravest swordsman alive.
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Ew, what's all over your cane?
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I don't know. I dropped it in
the movie theater last night.
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FRASIER: I love this picture.
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-You look adorable in that.
-[LAUGHS] Oh, I do not.
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You just like it because
you look so handsome in it.
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Well, the camera doesn't lie.
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What are you two giggling about?
30
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Oh, we're just looking at the snapshots
from our trip to the microbrewery.
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That must have been
especially fun for you, Dad.
32
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-You're not in any of these.
-I didn't go.
33
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That was the day Eddie
got into the poison oak.
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I was up all night rubbing
calamine lotion on his belly.
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These really are the golden
years for you, aren't they?
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-So it was just you and Frasier?
-Yes. [CHUCKLES]
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Your brother and I got pretty
silly after tasting all that beer.
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There's no need to tell Niles
everything we did that night.
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Yes, we got a bit naughty. [LAUGHS]
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Well, not too naughty, I hope.
41
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Oh, now, now, Dr. Crane, I
know what you're thinking.
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But not to worry. After all that
drinking, we didn't drive home.
43
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We spent the night in a motel.
44
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-Well, that takes a load off my mind.
-Mm.
45
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Well, Niles, what time is this
little soiree of yours this evening?
46
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Yeah, I still gotta get the
velvet in my slippers re-crushed.
47
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All right, Dad, I will find
you a Sherlock Holmes outfit.
48
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7 p.m.
49
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Which reminds me, I have to get
home before Marta arrives to set up.
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She's arachnophobic, poor thing.
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Last Halloween, she beat my
centerpiece to bits with a broom.
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Well, perhaps we should go
finish up those costumes, eh, wife?
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-Yes. [GIGGLES]
-Did you say "wife"?
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Hasn't your brother told you?
55
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Dr. Crane is going as Geoffrey
Chaucer from The Canterbury Tales,
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and I'll be dressed as the Wife of Bath.
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Yes, and a saucy little
strumpet she is too.
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Oh.
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-You naughty rogue. [GIGGLES]
-Well…
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We've been having quite a
time talking to each other like that.
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Yes, it's been ye olde
laugh riot around here.
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[CELL PHONE RINGS]
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Join me in my bed chamber, my Lord?
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After you, my juicy wench.
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"My juicy wench"? No, not you, Maris.
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Wait, wait, wait. I hope you're happy.
She's run for her water pills.
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Roz, who's on the line?
68
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Uh, on line four we have Ted
who is feeling a little disconnected.
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Go ahead, Ted.
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[DIAL TONE]
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Well, I hope Ted appreciates irony.
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On line two, we have Bill.
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He's going through a
very difficult transition.
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Hello, Bill.
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WOMAN: Hello? Is someone there?
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Well, I see we're pretty much
through our transition, aren't we, Bill?
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This is Dorothy.
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Oh, Bill's on line one.
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Yes, well, let's just stay with
Dorothy for the time being.
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How can I help you?
81
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You can get me Roz.
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I'm her manicurist, and she
called for an appointment.
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I'll call you back later, Dorothy.
84
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Perhaps we'd better
take a moment to regroup.
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I would like to apologize to
everyone for the unusually high number
86
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of technical difficulties
we've experienced today.
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And now we will go to these
public service messages.
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Explain yourself.
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I'm just a little off my game today.
90
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A little?
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Okay, a lot.
92
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Roz, you come in here looking
ghoulish, even for Halloween,
93
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and you sleepwalk your
way through my entire show.
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Oh.
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I'm sorry, Frasier.
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Sorry just doesn't cut it, Roz.
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What kind of explanation
can there possibly be
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for this level of unprofessionalism?
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I think I'm pregnant.
100
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-Pregnant?
-Well, I don't know for sure yet.
101
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I took one of those home
tests, and it was sort of iffy,
102
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so I went to see my doctor, and
he's gonna call me with results later.
103
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But, Roz, how?
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I don't know how.
105
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No one is more careful than I
am when it comes to birth control.
106
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But then again, even the best protection
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is only effective 99
out of a hundred times.
108
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I can't beat those odds.
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Yes, I suppose you've been
dodging that bullet for a long time now.
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Frasier, promise me you won't tell anyone.
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Oh, of course not, Roz,
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but, well, frankly, we don't even
know if we have anything to tell yet.
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What if there is?
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We'll just deal with that. No use
crossing that bridge until we come to it.
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I can't get my mind off it.
116
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Well, you know, Niles's party is tonight.
That should serve as a distraction.
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Frasier, I don't think I'm up for that.
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Oh, come on, Roz.
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Well, I did rent a costume and all.
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For me? It'll be fun.
You know you want to.
121
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That's exactly the kind of
talk that got me into this.
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Hey, tell your brother I'm
coming to his charity thing tonight.
123
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-Yes.
-I just found the perfect costume.
124
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As what literary character
will you be attending?
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Waldo.
126
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From Where's Waldo?
127
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He's, like, in 16 books.
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You call yourself well-read.
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[CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING]
130
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[GUESTS CHATTERING]
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[CELL PHONE RINGING]
132
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Niles Crane.
133
00:06:35,164 --> 00:06:36,415
Maris, where are you?
134
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You're still at the beauty parlor?
135
00:06:38,542 --> 00:06:40,793
Wh… No. Calm down, calm down.
136
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Stop crying.
It can't be as bad as all that.
137
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Exactly how much hair do you have left?
138
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Oh.
139
00:06:47,840 --> 00:06:49,132
Well, don't panic.
140
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We just have to find another
character for you to be tonight.
141
00:06:51,844 --> 00:06:56,055
Uh, there's an Ionesco play called
The Bald Soprano. [CHUCKLES]
142
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No, I'm joking, Maris.
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Wh… You've got to come.
144
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Maris, for God's sake, you have 37 wigs.
145
00:07:02,143 --> 00:07:04,353
Just go down to the
wig vault and pick one.
146
00:07:05,562 --> 00:07:08,815
Maris, this evening
means a great deal to me.
147
00:07:09,399 --> 00:07:12,568
I need you here with me.
Do you care about my feelings at all?
148
00:07:16,237 --> 00:07:17,697
Well, that answers that.
149
00:07:21,450 --> 00:07:22,783
So how's the party?
150
00:07:22,867 --> 00:07:25,369
Actually, we just got here.
We had a bit of a delay.
151
00:07:25,453 --> 00:07:27,495
Sherlock here led us
to the wrong apartment.
152
00:07:27,579 --> 00:07:28,413
Ah.
153
00:07:28,497 --> 00:07:29,831
So we're a minute late.
154
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You didn't complain when the
old lady gave us peanut butter cups.
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-NILES: Evening, all.
-Niles.
156
00:07:36,002 --> 00:07:37,920
Oh, what lovely costumes.
157
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Daphne, you look particularly beautiful.
158
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Oh, thanks. I'm not sure I agree.
It's a bit tight.
159
00:07:44,426 --> 00:07:45,884
I must have put on a pound of two.
160
00:07:45,968 --> 00:07:48,679
That's enough out of
you, you wanton trollop,
161
00:07:48,763 --> 00:07:52,515
or I'll smite your bawdy backside
with the flat of my sinewy right hand.
162
00:07:52,599 --> 00:07:55,949
At least on the ride over here I
could stick my head out the window.
163
00:07:56,227 --> 00:07:57,185
So where's the bar?
164
00:07:57,269 --> 00:08:00,146
It's right over here.
I'm serving grog and mead.
165
00:08:00,230 --> 00:08:01,940
Which one tastes most like beer?
166
00:08:04,233 --> 00:08:07,192
Oh, Roz. Oh, I'm so glad you came.
167
00:08:07,276 --> 00:08:10,529
-Any word from the doctor?
-No, and I am going crazy.
168
00:08:10,613 --> 00:08:13,323
I can't even picture myself as a mother.
Can you?
169
00:08:17,451 --> 00:08:19,536
Well, I don't think
discipline will be a problem.
170
00:08:19,620 --> 00:08:20,995
I'll just hang this up.
171
00:08:22,455 --> 00:08:25,165
Wow, Roz, don't you look smashing.
172
00:08:25,249 --> 00:08:27,459
What an interesting costume. Who are you?
173
00:08:27,543 --> 00:08:29,418
I'm "O" from The Story of O.
174
00:08:29,502 --> 00:08:30,670
ALL: Oh.
175
00:08:31,754 --> 00:08:33,254
It's gonna be a long night.
176
00:08:33,338 --> 00:08:35,757
Well, I think you look
particularly lovely tonight.
177
00:08:35,841 --> 00:08:37,175
There's a real glow about you.
178
00:08:37,259 --> 00:08:39,885
Oh, no. Oh, God. Not a glow.
179
00:08:40,594 --> 00:08:42,219
I'm sorry. I'm just a little jumpy.
180
00:08:42,303 --> 00:08:45,056
I had kind of an accident,
181
00:08:45,140 --> 00:08:47,766
and I just haven't found
out what the damage is yet.
182
00:08:47,850 --> 00:08:50,060
I need to check my machine.
Do you know where a phone is?
183
00:08:50,144 --> 00:08:51,894
Yeah, there's one at
the top of the stairs.
184
00:08:51,978 --> 00:08:53,353
-Thank you.
-Try not to worry.
185
00:08:53,437 --> 00:08:56,857
A few years back I got rear-ended.
Is that what happened to you?
186
00:09:01,068 --> 00:09:02,319
Not exactly.
187
00:09:05,280 --> 00:09:07,198
-Oh, hello.
-Hi.
188
00:09:07,282 --> 00:09:08,281
Are you here alone?
189
00:09:08,365 --> 00:09:10,284
Oh, God, I hope so.
190
00:09:13,703 --> 00:09:14,953
Oh, my.
191
00:09:15,037 --> 00:09:17,622
What a delectable medley
of fromagian splendor.
192
00:09:17,706 --> 00:09:19,499
You must try one.
193
00:09:20,458 --> 00:09:22,418
Mmm. Cheesy.
194
00:09:23,961 --> 00:09:26,128
Mmm, yes, cheesy.
195
00:09:26,212 --> 00:09:27,713
Le mot juste.
196
00:09:27,797 --> 00:09:31,925
It must be glorious to have such a
happy knack for clarity and concision.
197
00:09:33,594 --> 00:09:34,428
Yup.
198
00:09:36,721 --> 00:09:39,014
-So who are you supposed to be?
-Chingachgook.
199
00:09:39,098 --> 00:09:41,099
-I'm the last of the Mohicans.
-Oh.
200
00:09:41,641 --> 00:09:44,435
Well, that little mystery's solved.
201
00:09:54,193 --> 00:09:56,653
-Daphne, have you seen Roz?
-She's probably on the phone.
202
00:09:56,737 --> 00:09:59,404
Seems like every 15 minutes
she's calling her machine again.
203
00:09:59,488 --> 00:10:02,282
This little accident's
got her pretty worried.
204
00:10:03,116 --> 00:10:04,075
She told you about it?
205
00:10:04,159 --> 00:10:05,617
Champagne?
206
00:10:05,701 --> 00:10:08,551
Not now, Niles. Please, excuse us.
We need a moment alone.
207
00:10:09,330 --> 00:10:12,248
Roz told me all about it.
It's no big deal.
208
00:10:12,332 --> 00:10:14,457
Accidents happen even
when you're being careful.
209
00:10:14,541 --> 00:10:16,251
I had one myself a few years back.
210
00:10:16,335 --> 00:10:19,336
-Oh, Daphne, really?
-Yeah.
211
00:10:19,420 --> 00:10:21,923
It was one of those real wham-bam numbers.
212
00:10:24,174 --> 00:10:27,093
He was drunk and I
wasn't paying attention.
213
00:10:28,510 --> 00:10:31,346
I called and called, but
never got a penny out of him.
214
00:10:31,430 --> 00:10:32,930
I had no idea.
215
00:10:33,014 --> 00:10:34,765
Well, it's not so bad.
216
00:10:34,849 --> 00:10:35,683
For goodness' sake,
217
00:10:35,767 --> 00:10:39,018
back in Manchester, with all
those drunken louts out and about,
218
00:10:39,102 --> 00:10:41,646
it must have happened to
me at least a dozen times.
219
00:10:45,191 --> 00:10:47,025
Really? I had no…
220
00:10:47,567 --> 00:10:48,860
Really? Well…
221
00:10:51,820 --> 00:10:55,197
Of course, nothing is certain until
we get the pregnancy test results.
222
00:10:55,281 --> 00:10:56,658
Pregnancy?
223
00:10:57,158 --> 00:10:59,242
We're not talking about
a car accident, are we?
224
00:10:59,326 --> 00:11:00,535
Oh, dear.
225
00:11:00,619 --> 00:11:01,619
Roz is pregnant?
226
00:11:01,703 --> 00:11:04,037
Absolutely not.
Where could you get such an insane notion?
227
00:11:04,121 --> 00:11:05,497
-You just said she was.
-Shut up.
228
00:11:05,581 --> 00:11:09,417
Or I'm smite you with the back of my
sinewy right hand. Just get back here.
229
00:11:14,255 --> 00:11:16,555
-Did you notice where Frasier went?
-No idea.
230
00:11:16,923 --> 00:11:18,883
-What about Daphne?
-Haven't a clue.
231
00:11:18,967 --> 00:11:20,509
Holmes, you astound me.
232
00:11:22,219 --> 00:11:24,054
Oh, I just feel terrible about this.
233
00:11:24,638 --> 00:11:26,805
Roz swore me to secrecy.
234
00:11:26,889 --> 00:11:30,789
-I never should have said anything.
-It's not your fault. You thought I knew.
235
00:11:31,059 --> 00:11:34,436
Do you have a tissue?
These silly lashes are killing my eyes.
236
00:11:34,520 --> 00:11:36,021
I must be allergic to the adhesive.
237
00:11:36,105 --> 00:11:38,939
Just promise me you won't tell a soul.
238
00:11:39,023 --> 00:11:41,442
-We've got to keep this secret.
-All right.
239
00:11:41,526 --> 00:11:43,610
But we can't keep it a secret forever.
240
00:11:43,694 --> 00:11:45,988
-My God, we are talking about a baby.
-Oh.
241
00:11:48,406 --> 00:11:50,449
How could I have been so careless?
242
00:11:50,533 --> 00:11:52,617
These things happen. It's not your fault.
243
00:11:52,701 --> 00:11:54,994
You know who'll get the
blame if this ever gets out.
244
00:11:55,078 --> 00:11:57,663
Don't worry. I'll protect your reputation.
245
00:11:58,330 --> 00:12:01,080
-I'll tell everyone I forced you to do it.
-All right.
246
00:12:03,418 --> 00:12:06,918
We better get back to the party
before people start wondering about us.
247
00:12:07,754 --> 00:12:09,964
Oh. Oh, hello, Niles.
248
00:12:12,133 --> 00:12:15,051
What's your nose all bent
out of shape about? [LAUGHS]
249
00:12:19,805 --> 00:12:21,806
[CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING]
250
00:12:21,890 --> 00:12:23,891
[GUESTS CHATTERING]
251
00:12:25,727 --> 00:12:29,520
Oh, there's a literary figure I'd
like to know better. [CHUCKLES]
252
00:12:29,604 --> 00:12:32,189
-Just a minute. I need a word with you.
-What about?
253
00:12:32,273 --> 00:12:33,232
[DOORBELL RINGS]
254
00:12:33,316 --> 00:12:35,109
Stay there. I have guests to greet.
255
00:12:39,362 --> 00:12:41,029
Trick or treat.
256
00:12:41,113 --> 00:12:44,031
-How did you get past the doorman?
-We live in the building.
257
00:12:44,115 --> 00:12:46,116
I'm sorry, this isn't
a good night for this.
258
00:12:46,200 --> 00:12:48,493
-But it's Halloween.
-Oh, very well.
259
00:12:49,703 --> 00:12:53,580
Crab puff for you, and some
gravlax for you, and pâté for Dracula.
260
00:12:53,664 --> 00:12:54,790
Now off you go.
261
00:12:58,251 --> 00:12:59,669
I need to talk to you.
262
00:12:59,753 --> 00:13:01,212
-Not now, Niles.
-But…
263
00:13:01,296 --> 00:13:02,504
Let me guess.
264
00:13:02,588 --> 00:13:04,798
-Lady Godiva?
-No, Eve.
265
00:13:04,882 --> 00:13:05,715
From the Bible.
266
00:13:05,799 --> 00:13:08,300
Well, now I know why
they call it the "Good Book."
267
00:13:08,384 --> 00:13:09,260
[BOTH LAUGHING]
268
00:13:10,677 --> 00:13:12,720
What are you doing?
Are you going to abandon Daphne?
269
00:13:12,804 --> 00:13:16,098
I gave her a ride doesn't mean I have
to spend the whole evening with her.
270
00:13:16,182 --> 00:13:17,433
[DOORBELL RINGS]
271
00:13:21,686 --> 00:13:24,438
Hey. Hey, get a load of that schnozzola.
272
00:13:26,231 --> 00:13:28,065
No, wait, wait. Wait a minute.
Guess who I am?
273
00:13:28,149 --> 00:13:30,234
-I give up.
-I'm Waldo.
274
00:13:31,069 --> 00:13:32,111
From Where's Waldo?
275
00:13:32,569 --> 00:13:35,363
[GROANS] That guy you can't find
because he blends into the crowd.
276
00:13:35,447 --> 00:13:37,573
I don't know, but I'd
love a demonstration.
277
00:13:40,951 --> 00:13:42,786
And to think that all that time,
278
00:13:43,495 --> 00:13:45,788
your cat was curled
up in your sock drawer.
279
00:13:46,622 --> 00:13:48,164
They're almost human, aren't they?
280
00:13:48,248 --> 00:13:49,207
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
281
00:13:49,291 --> 00:13:51,208
Pardon me, I need a word with my brother.
282
00:13:51,292 --> 00:13:53,252
Not now, Niles.
283
00:13:53,336 --> 00:13:56,336
I'm doing really well here.
This pointy hat is a babe magnet.
284
00:13:57,506 --> 00:13:58,798
It's urgent.
285
00:13:58,882 --> 00:14:00,215
Just keep your voice down.
286
00:14:00,299 --> 00:14:02,342
I'm sorry. Will you excuse me?
287
00:14:02,426 --> 00:14:03,843
Sure, but hurry back.
288
00:14:05,512 --> 00:14:08,722
Your boorish behavior is simply appalling.
I can no longer hold my tongue.
289
00:14:08,806 --> 00:14:11,725
Replace tongue with liquor, and
I'll believe you. You're drunk, Niles.
290
00:14:11,809 --> 00:14:13,267
Drunk like a fox.
291
00:14:16,020 --> 00:14:17,120
I know about the baby.
292
00:14:18,146 --> 00:14:19,772
-You do? Who told you?
-Yes.
293
00:14:19,856 --> 00:14:21,773
I heard it from Daphne's own lips.
294
00:14:21,857 --> 00:14:23,525
-Daphne?
-Yes.
295
00:14:23,609 --> 00:14:26,444
That blabbermouth. I'll wring her neck.
296
00:14:26,528 --> 00:14:28,863
Listen to yourself.
Have you no conscience?
297
00:14:28,947 --> 00:14:31,323
You're getting awfully
exercised about this.
298
00:14:31,407 --> 00:14:34,116
But we're talking about a
single woman with a baby.
299
00:14:34,200 --> 00:14:35,492
What do you intend to do?
300
00:14:35,576 --> 00:14:37,995
Well, I suppose I could give her a raise.
301
00:14:41,373 --> 00:14:43,874
That's your idea of responsibility?
Give her a raise?
302
00:14:43,958 --> 00:14:46,168
Well, what do you want
me to do, marry her?
303
00:14:46,252 --> 00:14:49,045
Let's look at something here.
She's the one that got pregnant.
304
00:14:49,129 --> 00:14:51,755
-Hello, Roz.
-Beat it, Niles.
305
00:14:51,839 --> 00:14:53,340
-[DOORBELL RINGS]
-Stay here.
306
00:14:54,299 --> 00:14:56,342
I am so mad at you, I could scream.
307
00:14:56,426 --> 00:14:58,427
-How could you tell Niles about the baby?
-I didn't.
308
00:14:58,511 --> 00:15:00,636
Daphne told him, that damnable chatterbox.
309
00:15:00,720 --> 00:15:02,973
-And who told Daphne?
-Well…
310
00:15:03,557 --> 00:15:04,433
That would be me.
311
00:15:07,977 --> 00:15:10,061
Ah! What is it with all you children?
312
00:15:10,145 --> 00:15:11,495
Isn't it past your bedtime?
313
00:15:12,063 --> 00:15:13,981
Dr. Crane, it's me, Dr. Krovitz.
314
00:15:15,691 --> 00:15:18,734
Of course it is.
And this must be your lovely wife, Sylvia.
315
00:15:18,818 --> 00:15:21,446
-I don't know her.
-Trick or treat.
316
00:15:24,364 --> 00:15:25,448
What's wrong with you?
317
00:15:25,532 --> 00:15:27,908
I specifically asked
you not to tell anyone.
318
00:15:27,992 --> 00:15:31,244
I'm sorry, but it sounded as if she
already knew you were having a baby.
319
00:15:31,328 --> 00:15:32,662
What? You are?
320
00:15:33,997 --> 00:15:35,456
Oh, great. Nice going, Frasier.
321
00:15:35,540 --> 00:15:37,415
I'm sorry, but he is
the master of deduction.
322
00:15:37,499 --> 00:15:39,084
He would have figured it out.
323
00:15:40,418 --> 00:15:42,461
Just let it out. I'm here for you.
324
00:15:42,545 --> 00:15:44,837
I keep telling you, I'm not crying.
325
00:15:44,921 --> 00:15:46,089
It's me damn lashes.
326
00:15:46,173 --> 00:15:47,966
As courageous as you are beautiful.
327
00:15:48,550 --> 00:15:50,258
Oh, you shouldn't be drinking this poison.
328
00:15:50,342 --> 00:15:51,719
Here, Roz, drink this.
329
00:15:53,345 --> 00:15:57,056
-Roz, do you have a tissue?
-If you don't see it, I don't have it.
330
00:15:57,765 --> 00:16:01,101
I'm sorry. Do you want to go
get a cocktail napkin over here?
331
00:16:01,185 --> 00:16:02,894
Hurry back, brave girl.
332
00:16:04,437 --> 00:16:07,438
Oh, just look at her, poor thing.
333
00:16:07,522 --> 00:16:09,065
What are you talking about?
334
00:16:09,149 --> 00:16:12,109
Oh. Well, I suppose you'll
find out sooner or later.
335
00:16:12,818 --> 00:16:14,027
There's a baby on the way.
336
00:16:14,111 --> 00:16:15,612
Oh, you know about that too?
337
00:16:16,279 --> 00:16:17,154
Who told you?
338
00:16:17,238 --> 00:16:19,115
I heard Frasier and Roz talking about it.
339
00:16:19,199 --> 00:16:20,615
You don't seem very surprised.
340
00:16:20,699 --> 00:16:25,077
Well, I am fond of her, but let's face
it, she's no Sunday school teacher.
341
00:16:25,161 --> 00:16:27,747
She's been around the block a few times.
[CHUCKLES]
342
00:16:29,498 --> 00:16:32,999
Well, instead of heaping scorn on her,
you might put the blame where it belongs.
343
00:16:33,083 --> 00:16:34,209
On Frasier.
344
00:16:34,293 --> 00:16:37,753
-Look at him, the shameless Casanova.
-What's Frasier got to do with this?
345
00:16:37,837 --> 00:16:39,505
-He's the father.
-What?
346
00:16:39,589 --> 00:16:42,048
-Are you kidding me?
-Well, I heard it from his own mouth.
347
00:16:42,132 --> 00:16:43,383
Well, I don't believe it.
348
00:16:43,467 --> 00:16:45,367
-I gotta go talk to him.
-Wait. Wait.
349
00:16:45,802 --> 00:16:47,602
I've just made a momentous decision.
350
00:16:49,305 --> 00:16:53,182
There's one person in this family who
still has a sense of honor and decency.
351
00:16:53,266 --> 00:16:56,309
Frasier may not be able to do
right by that woman, but I will.
352
00:16:56,393 --> 00:16:57,770
What are you talking about?
353
00:16:58,729 --> 00:16:59,812
I'm gonna propose to her.
354
00:16:59,896 --> 00:17:02,106
Are you nuts? You're still married.
355
00:17:02,190 --> 00:17:05,191
Maris never needed me.
But there's a woman here who does.
356
00:17:05,275 --> 00:17:07,653
Boy, I didn't know you even liked her.
357
00:17:08,277 --> 00:17:09,737
Yes, I wore that mask well.
358
00:17:14,324 --> 00:17:16,159
But now it's time to
do the honorable thing.
359
00:17:16,243 --> 00:17:18,076
Oh, you mean divorce your wife
360
00:17:18,160 --> 00:17:21,038
and marry the woman who's
carrying your brother's child?
361
00:17:22,956 --> 00:17:24,082
I've made up my mind.
362
00:17:25,333 --> 00:17:28,251
-Nothing's going to stop me, Dad.
-Uh, excuse me, Niles.
363
00:17:28,335 --> 00:17:32,171
I'm afraid there's been a bit of an hors
d'œuvre mishap on your Persian rug.
364
00:17:32,255 --> 00:17:34,549
Just call me "Fumbles With Crab Puffs."
365
00:17:35,298 --> 00:17:36,466
Not now, Gil.
366
00:17:38,385 --> 00:17:41,887
There's no sense fretting
about it until you know for sure.
367
00:17:41,971 --> 00:17:44,722
Oh, God. My eyes are just getting worse.
368
00:17:44,806 --> 00:17:47,433
I suppose I should ask
Dr. Crane to take me home.
369
00:17:47,517 --> 00:17:49,351
I feel bad ruining his good time.
370
00:17:50,143 --> 00:17:51,811
I was having fun too.
371
00:17:51,895 --> 00:17:54,146
There are some very attractive men here.
372
00:17:54,230 --> 00:17:56,815
But who's going to
want me in this condition?
373
00:17:58,400 --> 00:18:00,401
Oh, don't worry about Frasier.
374
00:18:00,485 --> 00:18:02,569
-He'll take care of you.
-[NILES CACKLES]
375
00:18:02,653 --> 00:18:04,404
That's a laugh. Beat it, Roz.
376
00:18:04,488 --> 00:18:06,405
-Dr. Crane.
-Never mind.
377
00:18:06,489 --> 00:18:08,240
I have to go check my machine.
378
00:18:08,324 --> 00:18:13,412
Daphne, we've known
each other for four years now.
379
00:18:13,912 --> 00:18:17,080
Wait. I want to take the
time to phrase this just right.
380
00:18:17,164 --> 00:18:20,709
Well, you take all the time you need.
I've got to go find your brother.
381
00:18:24,795 --> 00:18:27,505
Dr. Crane, can I talk to you for a moment?
382
00:18:29,674 --> 00:18:31,383
I'm sorry, will you excuse me?
383
00:18:31,467 --> 00:18:32,634
It's okay.
384
00:18:32,718 --> 00:18:35,512
I'll go freshen my lipstick.
I feel naked without it.
385
00:18:35,596 --> 00:18:37,346
[CHUCKLES]
386
00:18:38,306 --> 00:18:40,015
Haven't you ruined my evening enough?
387
00:18:40,099 --> 00:18:41,265
What are you talking about?
388
00:18:41,349 --> 00:18:43,851
I am talking about you
and your blabbermouth.
389
00:18:43,935 --> 00:18:46,686
-Niles told me you told him.
-I did not!
390
00:18:46,770 --> 00:18:48,480
Oh, don't play innocent with me.
391
00:18:48,564 --> 00:18:52,399
Look, I don't mean to ruin your evening,
but I can't stay at the party like this.
392
00:18:52,483 --> 00:18:53,400
Look at my eyes.
393
00:18:53,484 --> 00:18:56,194
Oh, well, I am dreadfully sorry
for your condition, Daphne,
394
00:18:56,278 --> 00:18:57,654
but it's your own fault.
395
00:18:57,738 --> 00:19:01,188
You should have read the directions
on the package before you used it.
396
00:19:03,199 --> 00:19:06,244
I don't know why you're
blaming this whole mess on me.
397
00:19:06,328 --> 00:19:09,079
I just know I need a lift home right now.
398
00:19:09,163 --> 00:19:13,040
Oh, all right, but I'm not leaving
here until I get Eve's phone number,
399
00:19:13,124 --> 00:19:14,875
so you can just sit, have a drink,
400
00:19:14,959 --> 00:19:16,877
smoke a cigarette if you like.
401
00:19:18,128 --> 00:19:19,671
I am very attracted to this woman,
402
00:19:19,755 --> 00:19:21,838
and I'm not gonna let you and
your problem stand in my way.
403
00:19:21,922 --> 00:19:23,382
That's enough.
404
00:19:24,550 --> 00:19:25,758
Get your big nose out of this.
405
00:19:25,842 --> 00:19:27,510
Lower your voice.
You're embarrassing yourself.
406
00:19:27,594 --> 00:19:29,844
The only thing I'm embarrassed
about is that you're my brother,
407
00:19:29,928 --> 00:19:32,806
you cad, you bounder, you roué.
408
00:19:33,765 --> 00:19:36,183
What is wrong about trying to
get a woman's phone number?
409
00:19:36,267 --> 00:19:38,184
We're not interested
in your next conquest.
410
00:19:38,268 --> 00:19:39,936
We're talking about your last one.
411
00:19:40,020 --> 00:19:42,563
And before you deny
it, I have plenty of proof.
412
00:19:42,647 --> 00:19:45,232
From here, it smells like 80 proof.
413
00:19:46,400 --> 00:19:49,318
A woman stands here
before you in dire need.
414
00:19:49,402 --> 00:19:52,320
It's really not that bad.
I can find someone else who'll take me.
415
00:19:52,404 --> 00:19:53,613
Indeed you can.
416
00:19:53,697 --> 00:19:55,947
-Niles…
-I told you, don't try to stop me.
417
00:19:57,992 --> 00:19:59,993
You have the audacity to
seduce this poor woman,
418
00:20:00,077 --> 00:20:02,370
and then you aren't man
enough to stand by her?
419
00:20:02,454 --> 00:20:04,288
Before you make a
complete ass of yourself…
420
00:20:04,372 --> 00:20:07,333
Stop or I'll teach you a long
overdue lesson in chivalry.
421
00:20:09,501 --> 00:20:11,043
But Dr. Crane, you…
422
00:20:11,127 --> 00:20:12,545
NILES: No. No.
423
00:20:13,337 --> 00:20:14,337
Don't defend him.
424
00:20:14,421 --> 00:20:16,464
There may be one bastard in this family,
425
00:20:16,548 --> 00:20:19,091
but as long as I have
anything to say about it,
426
00:20:19,175 --> 00:20:20,718
your baby won't be another.
427
00:20:20,802 --> 00:20:21,678
Daphne…
428
00:20:22,969 --> 00:20:24,304
Will you marry me?
429
00:20:24,388 --> 00:20:26,555
Oh, for God's sake, you drunken imbecile.
430
00:20:28,224 --> 00:20:30,476
Daphne's not the one who's pregnant.
Roz is.
431
00:20:35,063 --> 00:20:36,354
Roz is?
432
00:20:36,438 --> 00:20:38,773
-Who's Roz?
-She's the one dressed like "O."
433
00:20:38,857 --> 00:20:40,233
ALL: Oh.
434
00:20:42,193 --> 00:20:44,360
That was very gallant, Dr. Crane.
435
00:20:44,444 --> 00:20:45,903
Perhaps you should propose to Roz.
436
00:20:45,987 --> 00:20:47,905
If anybody's gonna propose, it's Frasier.
437
00:20:47,989 --> 00:20:50,073
-What?
-How can you do that, get her pregnant?
438
00:20:50,157 --> 00:20:51,158
It was Frasier?
439
00:20:51,242 --> 00:20:54,786
Listen, everybody, I am
not the father of Roz's baby.
440
00:20:55,578 --> 00:20:58,079
In fact, we don't even know
for sure if there is a baby.
441
00:20:58,163 --> 00:20:59,707
We do now.
442
00:21:04,919 --> 00:21:06,002
[FRASIER SIGHS]
443
00:21:11,173 --> 00:21:13,894
♪ Hey, baby, I hear the blues a-callin' ♪
444
00:21:13,978 --> 00:21:16,344
♪ Tossed salads and scrambled eggs ♪
445
00:21:16,428 --> 00:21:17,387
Oh, my.
446
00:21:18,221 --> 00:21:20,847
♪ And maybe I seem a bit confused ♪
447
00:21:20,931 --> 00:21:23,141
♪ Yeah, maybe, but I got you pegged ♪
448
00:21:23,225 --> 00:21:25,392
Ha, ha, ha, ha!
449
00:21:25,476 --> 00:21:26,935
♪ But I don't know what to do ♪
450
00:21:27,019 --> 00:21:30,564
♪ With those tossed salads
and scrambled eggs ♪
451
00:21:32,315 --> 00:21:33,941
♪ They're callin' again ♪
452
00:21:35,276 --> 00:21:37,860
Scrambled eggs all over my face.
453
00:21:37,944 --> 00:21:39,487
What is a boy to do?
454
00:21:41,905 --> 00:21:44,992
Frasier has left the building.