1 00:00:10,757 --> 00:00:14,511 Know where we should go tonight? Frannie's Fish and Chips. 2 00:00:14,678 --> 00:00:17,764 Dad, we're taking Niles out to boost his spirits, not his cholesterol. 3 00:00:17,848 --> 00:00:21,853 Oh, please. That French food you guys eat is full of butter and cheese. 4 00:00:22,020 --> 00:00:24,605 But at least it's not prepared by a woman working a deep fryer 5 00:00:24,689 --> 00:00:27,151 in a batter-dipped brassiere. 6 00:00:28,152 --> 00:00:29,862 -Hey, isn't that Niles? -Where? 7 00:00:30,029 --> 00:00:31,379 Driving that old hatchback. 8 00:00:32,031 --> 00:00:35,619 No, Niles would never be seen in anything called a hatchback. 9 00:00:35,827 --> 00:00:37,496 Although it does look like him. 10 00:00:37,663 --> 00:00:38,914 [HORN HONKS] 11 00:00:39,998 --> 00:00:41,166 [TIRES SCREECHING] 12 00:00:41,333 --> 00:00:43,169 My God, he's running away. 13 00:00:43,378 --> 00:00:45,963 Well, catch him, Mr. 12-Cylinder-German-Engineering. 14 00:00:48,091 --> 00:00:49,133 [DIALING PHONE] 15 00:00:49,343 --> 00:00:50,803 [PHONE RINGS] 16 00:00:51,845 --> 00:00:52,888 Hello? 17 00:00:53,055 --> 00:00:54,764 FRASIER: Niles, what the hell are you doing? 18 00:00:54,848 --> 00:00:56,851 Well, I'm just pulling into my parking garage. 19 00:00:56,935 --> 00:00:59,103 -You on your way? -What are you talking about? 20 00:00:59,187 --> 00:01:02,356 -You're driving up Second Avenue. -You're in that little red thing. 21 00:01:02,440 --> 00:01:04,359 No, you must be mistaking me for someone else. 22 00:01:04,443 --> 00:01:05,945 See you when you get here. 23 00:01:06,112 --> 00:01:07,196 [DIAL TONE HUMMING] 24 00:01:07,363 --> 00:01:08,406 [DIALING PHONE] 25 00:01:08,572 --> 00:01:11,222 He's getting away! He just turned right at the corner. 26 00:01:11,409 --> 00:01:12,661 [PHONE RINGING] 27 00:01:12,828 --> 00:01:14,329 -NILES: Hello? -FRASIER: Niles? 28 00:01:14,538 --> 00:01:16,664 What are you running for? I can see that it's you. 29 00:01:16,748 --> 00:01:18,499 No, you're mistaking me for someone else. 30 00:01:18,583 --> 00:01:19,627 [HORN HONKING] 31 00:01:19,794 --> 00:01:22,964 That is ridiculous. I can hear my own horn through the phone. 32 00:01:25,508 --> 00:01:28,386 I may lose the connection. I'm stepping onto my elevator. 33 00:01:28,470 --> 00:01:29,972 I'll see you when you… 34 00:01:31,515 --> 00:01:33,933 -What's the matter with him? -Maris repossessed his car. 35 00:01:34,017 --> 00:01:35,853 That must've been all he was able to afford. 36 00:01:35,937 --> 00:01:37,689 He's just ashamed to admit it. 37 00:01:38,481 --> 00:01:41,067 -Hello? -Niles, do not hang up on me. 38 00:01:41,276 --> 00:01:44,071 We know what's going on. We're right behind you. 39 00:01:44,280 --> 00:01:45,697 I was afraid this would happen. 40 00:01:45,781 --> 00:01:49,368 I was petrified someone I knew would see me driving this humiliating car. 41 00:01:49,452 --> 00:01:51,871 It looks like some buggy derailed from a carnival ride, 42 00:01:51,955 --> 00:01:55,208 except that this has no safety features. 43 00:01:55,417 --> 00:01:57,252 Oh, you're worrying over nothing. 44 00:01:57,420 --> 00:02:00,465 What kind of person judges you by the sort of car you drive? 45 00:02:00,923 --> 00:02:01,966 Mitzie Gill. 46 00:02:02,133 --> 00:02:03,885 She might. She drives a Bentley. 47 00:02:04,051 --> 00:02:05,970 She's parking on the corner. She'll see me. 48 00:02:06,054 --> 00:02:07,514 [TIRES SCREECHING] 49 00:02:11,518 --> 00:02:12,771 Everybody all right? 50 00:02:12,979 --> 00:02:14,879 NILES: Dad, come quickly. I need help. 51 00:02:15,064 --> 00:02:16,316 Oh, my God, what is it? 52 00:02:16,483 --> 00:02:19,736 I need you to get up here and pretend this is your car. 53 00:02:26,619 --> 00:02:29,039 Ow. Oh, my shoulder is killing me. 54 00:02:29,206 --> 00:02:31,208 Did you bang into the steering wheel? 55 00:02:31,416 --> 00:02:34,878 No, I've been parallel parking all week without power steering. 56 00:02:35,797 --> 00:02:37,924 -Let me get you some aspirin. -Thank you. 57 00:02:38,090 --> 00:02:41,177 Check upstairs in the bathroom off the study. 58 00:02:41,385 --> 00:02:42,553 Pardon the disarray. 59 00:02:42,721 --> 00:02:45,640 I've had to cut my cleaning lady down to two times a week. 60 00:02:45,724 --> 00:02:48,560 Yeah, looks like a bomb went off. 61 00:02:49,394 --> 00:02:52,190 I gather your financial situation's gotten a bit shaky. 62 00:02:52,398 --> 00:02:55,192 Oh, yes. Ever since I rejected Maris' attempt to woo me back, 63 00:02:55,276 --> 00:02:57,111 she's been quite vindictive. 64 00:02:57,278 --> 00:02:59,365 She's frozen all the accounts. Sherry? 65 00:02:59,573 --> 00:03:00,699 Thank you. 66 00:03:00,866 --> 00:03:03,160 My salary isn't even covering my legal bills. 67 00:03:03,327 --> 00:03:04,912 What do your lawyers tell you? 68 00:03:05,120 --> 00:03:09,209 Well, mostly that my salary isn't even covering my legal bills. 69 00:03:13,089 --> 00:03:14,506 You know, Niles, 70 00:03:14,590 --> 00:03:17,801 if this siege is to continue, you may have to tighten your belt. 71 00:03:17,885 --> 00:03:20,597 Perhaps we should make up a list of your expenses. 72 00:03:20,764 --> 00:03:23,058 NILES: All right. Here. 73 00:03:23,267 --> 00:03:25,060 Thank you. Oh, not with that pen. 74 00:03:25,269 --> 00:03:28,189 No, that once belonged to Noel Coward. 75 00:03:28,398 --> 00:03:30,441 -I just purchased it. -It is stunning. 76 00:03:30,608 --> 00:03:32,109 But if you're gonna be economizing, 77 00:03:32,193 --> 00:03:34,987 perhaps you'll have to forgo the decorative antique pens. 78 00:03:35,071 --> 00:03:38,075 Could we review my list before we make any drastic decisions? 79 00:03:38,284 --> 00:03:41,912 -Very well. -That's my rent. 80 00:03:42,079 --> 00:03:45,292 -That's insurance. -You pay that much in rent? 81 00:03:46,543 --> 00:03:48,461 Well, that includes the building newsletter. 82 00:03:48,545 --> 00:03:50,589 It's outrageous. 83 00:03:50,756 --> 00:03:52,716 MARTIN [OVER INTERCOM]: Niles, are you there? 84 00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:55,469 Yes, Dad. You can't blame me for the housing market. 85 00:03:55,553 --> 00:03:56,637 This is a simple apartment. 86 00:03:56,721 --> 00:04:00,350 I'm in some room with a lot of books, but it doesn't have a bathroom. 87 00:04:01,018 --> 00:04:03,395 NILES: Oh, that's the library, not the study. 88 00:04:03,604 --> 00:04:04,896 Go down the hall, make a left. 89 00:04:04,980 --> 00:04:08,109 Well, this simple apartment of yours is gonna bankrupt you. 90 00:04:08,276 --> 00:04:10,361 You must admit it's a bit large for one person. 91 00:04:10,445 --> 00:04:11,779 Don't forget I have a pet. 92 00:04:11,946 --> 00:04:16,285 Are you telling me that your bird requires both a study and a library? 93 00:04:17,244 --> 00:04:19,162 All right, I will return the Noel Coward pen, 94 00:04:19,246 --> 00:04:21,124 but this is my home. 95 00:04:21,291 --> 00:04:23,209 This is a basic necessity. 96 00:04:23,877 --> 00:04:27,005 Okay, I found the aspirin, but I'm lost again. 97 00:04:27,172 --> 00:04:30,092 I'm in a blue room with big rolls of paper. 98 00:04:30,301 --> 00:04:32,511 That's the gift wrapping room. 99 00:04:35,014 --> 00:04:36,058 Look for the stairs. 100 00:04:36,224 --> 00:04:38,101 The only stairs I could find go up. 101 00:04:38,310 --> 00:04:40,687 You have a third floor? 102 00:04:41,229 --> 00:04:42,779 It's practically a crawl space. 103 00:04:43,440 --> 00:04:46,527 Go out the door to the left. 104 00:04:49,113 --> 00:04:51,908 Don't look at me like that. I have to have a roof over my head. 105 00:04:51,992 --> 00:04:54,161 Niles, you have three roofs over your head. 106 00:04:54,370 --> 00:04:56,205 For God's sake, come to your senses. 107 00:04:56,413 --> 00:04:57,998 Look at the numbers. They don't lie. 108 00:04:58,082 --> 00:04:59,709 You don't have any choice. 109 00:04:59,876 --> 00:05:01,753 Now I'm stumped. How do I get down? 110 00:05:01,920 --> 00:05:03,713 There's a bookcase blocking my way. 111 00:05:03,922 --> 00:05:06,717 -The bookcase is a secret door. -How do I open it? 112 00:05:06,926 --> 00:05:09,345 -Poke Mrs. Dalloway on the bottom. -What? 113 00:05:09,553 --> 00:05:13,850 -The yellow book on the lower shelf. -Oh, all right. 114 00:05:14,142 --> 00:05:16,228 Frasier, ever since I was a little boy, 115 00:05:16,395 --> 00:05:18,313 I have walked by this building and wondered 116 00:05:18,397 --> 00:05:21,149 what sort of people could live in such a magnificent place. 117 00:05:21,233 --> 00:05:22,485 I know, Niles. 118 00:05:22,694 --> 00:05:26,114 Getting in here after Maris dumped me 119 00:05:26,280 --> 00:05:28,199 proved I was not a complete failure. 120 00:05:28,408 --> 00:05:29,576 I understand that. 121 00:05:30,786 --> 00:05:32,746 And I have no choice, do I? 122 00:05:33,330 --> 00:05:34,665 I'm sorry. 123 00:05:35,749 --> 00:05:37,376 You know, perhaps you should move 124 00:05:37,460 --> 00:05:39,378 before you're obligated for another month's rent. 125 00:05:39,462 --> 00:05:41,912 You can stay at my place until you find something. 126 00:05:42,882 --> 00:05:44,343 Thank you. 127 00:05:44,510 --> 00:05:48,889 Here you go. You can get your own glass of water. 128 00:05:50,349 --> 00:05:54,104 -This aspirin's expired. -Well, it wasn't when I found it. 129 00:05:56,815 --> 00:05:58,900 [GLASSES CLINKING] 130 00:05:59,652 --> 00:06:02,071 -DAPHNE: Oh, I'll clean up. -Not necessary. 131 00:06:02,238 --> 00:06:03,864 You've been cooking dinner every night. 132 00:06:03,948 --> 00:06:06,200 I hardly feel like it's my kitchen anymore. 133 00:06:06,284 --> 00:06:09,705 Of course it's your kitchen. No, no, that doesn't go there. 134 00:06:10,789 --> 00:06:13,917 I know it's probably a bit presumptuous of me 135 00:06:14,084 --> 00:06:16,379 to rearrange your kitchen, but I promise, 136 00:06:16,546 --> 00:06:19,382 you'll find it a lot more… 137 00:06:22,136 --> 00:06:24,180 …user-friendly. 138 00:06:25,264 --> 00:06:28,225 -Where's my jar of Bovril? -No, I wasn't. 139 00:06:32,189 --> 00:06:36,109 Oh, the meat paste. Well, I threw it out. It smelled rancid. 140 00:06:36,318 --> 00:06:39,405 Well, that's how it's supposed to smell. It's English. 141 00:06:41,741 --> 00:06:44,118 Well, I'm off to bed. 142 00:06:46,455 --> 00:06:48,540 Roz and I have a very important breakfast meeting 143 00:06:48,624 --> 00:06:50,125 with a potential employer tomorrow, 144 00:06:50,209 --> 00:06:52,859 and I can't be burning the midnight oil like you, Dad. 145 00:06:53,797 --> 00:06:56,883 -Dad? -What? Oh, all right, I'll get a coaster. 146 00:06:57,050 --> 00:06:58,176 FRASIER: No. 147 00:06:59,094 --> 00:07:01,555 What's with you? You could barely stay awake during dinner. 148 00:07:01,639 --> 00:07:03,974 You'd be the same way if you shared a room with Niles. 149 00:07:04,058 --> 00:07:07,646 All night long, up and down, shifting and tucking. 150 00:07:07,854 --> 00:07:10,398 If it's really annoying you, I'll move his cot into my room. 151 00:07:10,482 --> 00:07:12,984 At least one of us in this family could show him compassion. 152 00:07:13,068 --> 00:07:15,529 Good luck. Last night, I got up and went to the bathroom. 153 00:07:15,613 --> 00:07:18,074 When I came back, he'd made my bed. 154 00:07:21,536 --> 00:07:23,622 [NILES GARGLING] 155 00:07:24,915 --> 00:07:27,000 [NILES SPITTING] 156 00:07:28,001 --> 00:07:30,088 [RAIN PATTERING] 157 00:07:33,925 --> 00:07:36,511 -Will you be much longer? -NILES: Almost done. 158 00:07:36,719 --> 00:07:37,971 I only ask because Roz and I 159 00:07:38,055 --> 00:07:40,182 have this important job interview tomorrow morning. 160 00:07:40,266 --> 00:07:42,351 I'd like to be well-rested. 161 00:07:42,560 --> 00:07:45,021 -You've been in there for 20 minutes. -No, I haven't. 162 00:07:45,105 --> 00:07:46,148 [TIMER DINGS] 163 00:07:46,314 --> 00:07:47,524 Now I have. 164 00:07:48,733 --> 00:07:51,069 You should try this marvelous new facial peel. 165 00:07:51,278 --> 00:07:52,928 It's like getting ten years back. 166 00:07:53,072 --> 00:07:55,366 I'd settle for the last half hour. 167 00:07:55,533 --> 00:07:57,034 This is gonna be so much fun. 168 00:07:57,243 --> 00:07:59,871 Bunking together like when we were kids. 169 00:08:03,292 --> 00:08:06,837 Oh, yes. It's all coming back to me now. 170 00:08:07,588 --> 00:08:09,090 I just want to tell you again 171 00:08:09,257 --> 00:08:11,676 how much I appreciate your taking me in. 172 00:08:11,843 --> 00:08:14,679 Not every brother in your position would be so generous. 173 00:08:14,888 --> 00:08:18,309 Think nothing of it, Niles. You're no trouble at all. 174 00:08:21,437 --> 00:08:24,983 [WHIRRING] 175 00:08:47,842 --> 00:08:52,138 Oh, dear, the sound of that rain's gonna keep me up all night. 176 00:08:52,597 --> 00:08:56,268 FRASIER: I'm amazed you can hear it over there in Mission Control. 177 00:08:57,728 --> 00:09:01,149 -Do you mind if I close the window? -Not at all. 178 00:09:05,362 --> 00:09:07,447 Ah. Much better. 179 00:09:10,034 --> 00:09:12,119 [RAIN PATTERING ON RECORDING] 180 00:09:13,246 --> 00:09:16,166 What are you talking about? That's just more rain noise. 181 00:09:16,375 --> 00:09:17,625 It's much more than rain. 182 00:09:17,709 --> 00:09:21,171 This is all of the sounds of the Brazilian rainforest. 183 00:09:22,130 --> 00:09:24,592 -Does it bother you? -No. 184 00:09:25,385 --> 00:09:27,136 Just go to bed. 185 00:09:29,389 --> 00:09:30,932 [ANIMAL SCREECHES ON RECORDING] 186 00:09:31,016 --> 00:09:32,977 Oh, for God's sake, Niles! 187 00:09:33,185 --> 00:09:36,188 All right, all right, I'll switch over to "Babbling Brook." 188 00:09:37,064 --> 00:09:38,692 [WATER RIPPLING ON RECORDING] 189 00:09:38,858 --> 00:09:41,403 If you're feeling tense about that interview, 190 00:09:41,569 --> 00:09:43,529 I could show you one of my breathing exercises. 191 00:09:43,613 --> 00:09:46,701 No, no, just some sleep will do. 192 00:09:46,909 --> 00:09:49,245 -Good night. -Good night. 193 00:09:52,623 --> 00:09:55,377 [NILES BREATHING HEAVILY] 194 00:10:12,229 --> 00:10:15,441 Oh, for God's sakes, Niles! 195 00:10:17,068 --> 00:10:18,319 What the hell happened? 196 00:10:18,403 --> 00:10:20,613 NILES: isn't it obvious? You blew a fuse. 197 00:10:20,697 --> 00:10:22,615 FRASIER: You haven't seen anything yet. 198 00:10:22,699 --> 00:10:24,243 NILES: Ow! 199 00:10:27,538 --> 00:10:30,332 ROZ: I know he's on his way. He must've gotten the address wrong. 200 00:10:30,416 --> 00:10:33,545 I knew I should've picked a place he'd been to before. 201 00:10:33,962 --> 00:10:36,756 -I'm sorry, I'm afraid I have to leave. -Oh, please, don't leave. 202 00:10:36,840 --> 00:10:39,177 -Let me just try his cell phone. -Very well. 203 00:10:40,928 --> 00:10:43,639 Hello, Frasier, it's Roz. 204 00:10:43,806 --> 00:10:46,351 You sound terrible. Where are you? 205 00:10:46,518 --> 00:10:47,853 The emergency room? 206 00:10:48,437 --> 00:10:50,731 Oh, my God! His appendix burst. 207 00:10:50,898 --> 00:10:52,441 No, no, no, don't apologize. 208 00:10:52,649 --> 00:10:54,735 It's not your fault. We'll just reschedule it. 209 00:10:54,819 --> 00:10:57,238 I am so sorry I'm late. 210 00:10:57,405 --> 00:10:59,574 My usual, please. 211 00:11:00,617 --> 00:11:02,328 My phone, please. 212 00:11:02,828 --> 00:11:04,914 Mr. Draper, you're not leaving, are you? 213 00:11:05,081 --> 00:11:08,876 I have another meeting and I don't like to keep people waiting. 214 00:11:09,044 --> 00:11:11,546 -I'm gonna kill you. -Roz, please, I'm so sorry. 215 00:11:11,755 --> 00:11:13,339 -Where have you been? -Blame Niles. 216 00:11:13,423 --> 00:11:16,050 He kept me up late last night. I slept right through my alarm. 217 00:11:16,134 --> 00:11:18,387 What's he still doing there? Hasn't he found a place? 218 00:11:18,471 --> 00:11:20,306 No, he sublet his apartment at the Montana. 219 00:11:20,390 --> 00:11:23,350 He has to find something furnished. There aren't that many out there. 220 00:11:23,434 --> 00:11:26,230 -Still, he's looking every day. -Not yesterday. 221 00:11:26,438 --> 00:11:27,481 What do you mean? 222 00:11:27,689 --> 00:11:31,484 I saw him out in front of the Varsity waiting in line for Lawrence of Arabia. 223 00:11:31,568 --> 00:11:34,030 That's impossible. He told me he had appointments all day. 224 00:11:34,114 --> 00:11:35,698 Frasier, I know Niles when I see him. 225 00:11:35,782 --> 00:11:39,077 How many people go to the movies with their own seat cushion? 226 00:11:40,287 --> 00:11:42,248 You mean, he hasn't even been looking? 227 00:11:42,415 --> 00:11:45,418 I don't know. Ask him yourself. 228 00:11:45,584 --> 00:11:47,337 Niles. 229 00:11:47,587 --> 00:11:49,673 -Oh. Frasier. -Yes. 230 00:11:49,840 --> 00:11:52,509 Off for another day of apartment hunting? 231 00:11:52,676 --> 00:11:54,470 Yes. Yes. 232 00:11:54,637 --> 00:11:57,056 Only hope I see as many as I saw yesterday. 233 00:11:57,223 --> 00:11:58,474 Covered the whole waterfront. 234 00:11:58,558 --> 00:12:01,658 Oh, well, then you must have seen the one on Crawford and Pike. 235 00:12:01,936 --> 00:12:05,315 -Yes, I think so. -Mm-hmm. White with blue trim? 236 00:12:05,524 --> 00:12:07,859 Right next to the market. Couple of flags out front. 237 00:12:07,943 --> 00:12:11,072 Yes, it looks nice from the outside. It's completely unsuitable for living. 238 00:12:11,156 --> 00:12:15,285 Oh, yes. I'd imagine so, seeing as it's a Chevron station. 239 00:12:16,286 --> 00:12:19,290 -What? -You saw nothing. 240 00:12:19,457 --> 00:12:21,875 Nothing yesterday, probably nothing in the last two weeks. 241 00:12:21,959 --> 00:12:25,213 -You've been going to the movies. -That is an outrageous lie. 242 00:12:25,422 --> 00:12:28,467 Roz saw you and your seat cushion. 243 00:12:29,009 --> 00:12:30,593 Here I was feeling sorry for you 244 00:12:30,677 --> 00:12:32,763 and you were lying to me the whole time. 245 00:12:34,348 --> 00:12:35,892 I'm sorry. 246 00:12:36,267 --> 00:12:38,853 After the first day, I just couldn't look anymore. 247 00:12:39,020 --> 00:12:41,564 I'll never find anything tolerable in my price range. 248 00:12:41,648 --> 00:12:44,485 It's barely tolerable having a price range. 249 00:12:44,693 --> 00:12:47,614 All right, Niles. Well, listen. Today, I am going with you. 250 00:12:47,780 --> 00:12:49,991 It may be the only way you ever find a place. 251 00:12:50,158 --> 00:12:52,243 You sound as if I plan to stay with you forever. 252 00:12:52,327 --> 00:12:55,164 Well, I did notice you put a bottle of '93 Pichon-Baron 253 00:12:55,331 --> 00:12:58,167 -on the grocery list last night. -So? 254 00:12:58,375 --> 00:13:01,253 That wine's not even drinkable for two years. 255 00:13:03,673 --> 00:13:07,010 And we've got a rec room too. Did you see the hot tub? 256 00:13:07,177 --> 00:13:10,515 If you're referring to that six-man petri dish, yes. 257 00:13:10,681 --> 00:13:13,684 -I think we're about finished here. -We can't leave without seeing it. 258 00:13:13,768 --> 00:13:17,271 Frank was kind enough to put on pants and bring us up here. 259 00:13:18,190 --> 00:13:22,319 Welcome to the Shangri-la. 260 00:13:27,242 --> 00:13:32,622 Oh. Niles, it's magnificent. 261 00:13:37,294 --> 00:13:39,421 I think you'll see why the Shangri-la is so popular 262 00:13:39,505 --> 00:13:41,755 -with bachelors like yourself. -NILES: Mm-hmm. 263 00:13:41,925 --> 00:13:43,426 I had assumed it was that charming 264 00:13:43,510 --> 00:13:47,180 "No credit, no problem" banner out front. 265 00:13:47,389 --> 00:13:49,684 Here's your kitchen, all modern. 266 00:13:49,892 --> 00:13:52,644 It looks like the previous tenant left a four-slot toaster behind. 267 00:13:52,728 --> 00:13:54,128 Isn't that something, Niles? 268 00:13:54,230 --> 00:13:55,815 You can make yourself a club sandwich 269 00:13:55,899 --> 00:13:57,943 and still have a slice left for guests. 270 00:13:58,652 --> 00:14:00,236 I think I've got the lay of the land. 271 00:14:00,320 --> 00:14:02,155 No, wait, we haven't seen the bedroom yet. 272 00:14:02,239 --> 00:14:04,576 Right this way. 273 00:14:12,751 --> 00:14:14,461 Looks like he left the sheets behind. 274 00:14:14,545 --> 00:14:16,087 Well, how's that for convenience? 275 00:14:16,171 --> 00:14:18,675 No dust bunnies under that bed. No, sirree. 276 00:14:19,175 --> 00:14:21,595 That is a vacuumer's dream, that is. 277 00:14:21,761 --> 00:14:24,430 Well, let's have a look at this closet space, shall we? 278 00:14:24,514 --> 00:14:28,019 Oh, sorry, I thought Gary's sister was supposed to pick this stuff up. 279 00:14:28,227 --> 00:14:30,813 Well, help yourself. 280 00:14:31,897 --> 00:14:35,902 This Gary certainly seems to have left in a hurry. 281 00:14:36,069 --> 00:14:37,819 Did he leave no forwarding address? 282 00:14:39,031 --> 00:14:43,036 He left a note, but no. 283 00:14:44,370 --> 00:14:45,663 No address. 284 00:14:46,706 --> 00:14:49,668 Well, take your time. 285 00:14:52,880 --> 00:14:54,590 -Now can we go? -No, no, Niles. 286 00:14:54,757 --> 00:14:59,846 Not before we've had a look at this very charming little ironing board here. 287 00:15:00,013 --> 00:15:01,056 There you are, see? 288 00:15:01,264 --> 00:15:03,183 You sure that's not the guest room? 289 00:15:06,854 --> 00:15:09,649 Niles, listen, I know this isn't what you had in mind, 290 00:15:09,857 --> 00:15:11,307 but we have scoured the city. 291 00:15:11,401 --> 00:15:13,904 I'm afraid this is the only thing we're gonna find. 292 00:15:14,112 --> 00:15:16,740 Well, I wanna keep looking. There's no rush. 293 00:15:18,450 --> 00:15:21,204 -Well, actually… -What? 294 00:15:21,371 --> 00:15:22,872 Well, Niles… 295 00:15:23,206 --> 00:15:27,920 Oh. You want me to move out. I've overstayed my welcome. I see. 296 00:15:28,087 --> 00:15:29,796 No, it's time for you to understand 297 00:15:29,880 --> 00:15:32,424 that your circumstances have changed, 298 00:15:32,591 --> 00:15:34,302 and you're going to have to adapt. 299 00:15:34,511 --> 00:15:37,263 I don't want to adapt. I want to go home. 300 00:15:37,430 --> 00:15:39,224 Niles, 301 00:15:39,432 --> 00:15:41,727 you are home. 302 00:15:47,024 --> 00:15:52,364 Well, where are my manners? Can I get you some toast? 303 00:16:07,506 --> 00:16:09,341 Yes. 304 00:16:11,260 --> 00:16:14,264 Well, I'm off. Oh, your brother called. 305 00:16:14,431 --> 00:16:17,224 He said he won't be joining you for the wine club tonight. 306 00:16:17,308 --> 00:16:19,270 Really? That's a first. 307 00:16:19,437 --> 00:16:22,787 You know, it's funny how much Eddie misses that bird of Dr. Crane's. 308 00:16:22,898 --> 00:16:25,401 This morning, a pigeon landed on the terrace. 309 00:16:25,568 --> 00:16:28,780 Eddie jumped up, excited, ran over and started barking at it. 310 00:16:28,947 --> 00:16:30,573 Yes, he does that all the time. 311 00:16:30,657 --> 00:16:33,827 This was a different sort of bark. Like, "You're not my bird. 312 00:16:34,035 --> 00:16:37,665 Don't fly here and get me hopes up like that. You're not my bird." 313 00:16:39,584 --> 00:16:42,421 It was silly and sad at the same time, you know? 314 00:16:42,629 --> 00:16:44,715 Firsthand. 315 00:16:46,675 --> 00:16:50,305 -Did Niles say why he canceled at all? -No. 316 00:16:50,513 --> 00:16:52,556 You know, I just hope he's not depressed. 317 00:16:52,640 --> 00:16:56,394 I keep picturing him sitting in that dreadful apartment all alone. 318 00:16:57,021 --> 00:17:00,148 Maybe I should've let him stay here longer until he found something nicer. 319 00:17:00,232 --> 00:17:02,150 I'm sure once he gets his books on the shelf 320 00:17:02,234 --> 00:17:04,111 and his opera playing, he'll be fine. 321 00:17:04,321 --> 00:17:06,197 You have nothing to feel guilty about. 322 00:17:06,281 --> 00:17:10,494 Fras, your antique scout brought over that Noel Coward pen you bought. 323 00:17:11,787 --> 00:17:14,373 Noel Coward pen? Like the one your brother's got? 324 00:17:14,582 --> 00:17:18,419 Oh, it is his. He returned it and I pounced on it. 325 00:17:18,628 --> 00:17:20,672 Dr. Crane's feeling bad about moving his brother out. 326 00:17:20,756 --> 00:17:24,306 Oh, come on, Fras, he's a big boy. You just gave him the push he needed. 327 00:17:24,593 --> 00:17:25,969 Well, he did need a push. 328 00:17:26,178 --> 00:17:29,306 Besides, I'm sure the place you found him isn't as bad as all that. 329 00:17:29,390 --> 00:17:31,267 You're right, Daphne. It isn't all that bad. 330 00:17:31,351 --> 00:17:33,812 And once he's decorated it, it'll be much nicer. 331 00:17:33,978 --> 00:17:37,525 You're right. You're right. I'm being much too hard on myself. 332 00:17:37,691 --> 00:17:40,736 -He'll be happy at the Shangri-la. -You got him in the Shangri-la? 333 00:17:40,820 --> 00:17:43,198 That's where Duke stayed during his divorce. 334 00:17:43,365 --> 00:17:47,118 Let me tell you, that's my kind of place. 335 00:17:48,495 --> 00:17:50,790 What have I done? 336 00:17:52,083 --> 00:17:53,960 [DOORBELL RINGS] 337 00:17:59,967 --> 00:18:01,009 Hey, Niles. 338 00:18:01,218 --> 00:18:02,635 -Dad, Frasier. -FRASIER: Hello, Niles. 339 00:18:02,719 --> 00:18:04,889 Did you not get my message about the wine club? 340 00:18:04,973 --> 00:18:07,057 We thought it'd be fun to go out and have a meal. 341 00:18:07,141 --> 00:18:09,018 Oh, well, actually, I'm on my way out. 342 00:18:09,102 --> 00:18:11,688 Where to? Bali-ha'i? 343 00:18:12,815 --> 00:18:15,400 No, they're having a Ping-Pong tournament in the rumpus room 344 00:18:15,484 --> 00:18:18,571 and my neighbor Jimbo has invited me to be his partner. 345 00:18:18,779 --> 00:18:21,199 Let me go and tell him that I'll be a couple minutes late. 346 00:18:21,283 --> 00:18:24,494 If you're thirsty, they sent up some wine coolers in my welcome basket. 347 00:18:24,578 --> 00:18:25,954 Hey. And you were worried. 348 00:18:26,121 --> 00:18:28,499 He's making friends, taking part in activities. 349 00:18:28,666 --> 00:18:33,212 Dad, he's obviously covering. That shirt alone is a shriek for help. 350 00:18:33,421 --> 00:18:36,049 Is it so hard for you to believe that he could be happy? 351 00:18:36,133 --> 00:18:38,093 In this place, yes. 352 00:18:38,260 --> 00:18:40,387 Oh, oh. You should stay. 353 00:18:40,554 --> 00:18:43,204 The guys in D building are bringing over a six-foot sub, 354 00:18:43,349 --> 00:18:46,936 and they've rigged the pinball machine so it's free play all night. 355 00:18:47,145 --> 00:18:48,938 Niles, I'm finding it a bit difficult 356 00:18:49,022 --> 00:18:51,609 to accept this newfound enthusiasm of yours. 357 00:18:51,817 --> 00:18:54,569 Weren't you the one who told me I should adjust to my circumstances? 358 00:18:54,653 --> 00:18:57,531 I'm just concerned that you're immersing yourself in this lifestyle 359 00:18:57,615 --> 00:18:59,408 to avoid feeling the pain you're going… 360 00:18:59,492 --> 00:19:02,411 Would you leave the guy alone? No, he's obviously having a good time. 361 00:19:02,495 --> 00:19:04,289 I'm having a very good time. 362 00:19:04,456 --> 00:19:06,556 MARTIN: Why shouldn't he have a good time? 363 00:19:06,667 --> 00:19:09,462 I'd be happy here myself. This is my kind of place. 364 00:19:10,212 --> 00:19:14,092 -Get me out of this hellhole. -What did I say? 365 00:19:14,301 --> 00:19:17,470 I can't live this charade. I have tried. It's taking too much out of me. 366 00:19:17,554 --> 00:19:20,642 Now, Niles, this place is fine. And you know what they say: 367 00:19:20,850 --> 00:19:22,977 What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. 368 00:19:23,186 --> 00:19:25,855 But, Dad, not everyone makes it into that second group. 369 00:19:25,939 --> 00:19:29,360 And I've got the luau shirt to prove it. Okay, that's it, that's it. 370 00:19:29,568 --> 00:19:31,528 Enough is enough. 371 00:19:32,029 --> 00:19:33,379 Niles, who are you calling? 372 00:19:33,530 --> 00:19:36,280 I'm calling Maris. I'm going to beg her to take me back. 373 00:19:36,451 --> 00:19:38,077 -You don't wanna do that. -Yes, I do. 374 00:19:38,161 --> 00:19:40,663 Life with Maris wasn't so bad. It was my fault, after all. 375 00:19:40,747 --> 00:19:42,665 I was too rigid. I was always making demands. 376 00:19:42,749 --> 00:19:45,378 -No, Niles. -Eat something. Unlock this door. 377 00:19:45,544 --> 00:19:47,713 -Don't throw that. -Niles, give me that phone. 378 00:19:47,797 --> 00:19:49,506 -No. -You don't know what you're doing. 379 00:19:49,590 --> 00:19:51,509 -Yes, I do. -Drop it and kick it over here. 380 00:19:51,593 --> 00:19:54,388 I won't. I'm dialing. I'm pressing send. 381 00:19:54,596 --> 00:19:56,056 It's ringing. 382 00:19:56,264 --> 00:19:57,724 Maris. 383 00:19:57,891 --> 00:19:59,936 I'm calling… 384 00:20:00,144 --> 00:20:01,771 I'm calling… 385 00:20:04,148 --> 00:20:06,526 I'm calling to tell you that there is a new address 386 00:20:06,610 --> 00:20:09,154 for forwarding my mail. 387 00:20:09,321 --> 00:20:14,244 It's 62 Elm Street, Shangri-la Apartments. 388 00:20:14,995 --> 00:20:16,663 Thank you. 389 00:20:18,498 --> 00:20:20,542 Well, good for you, Niles. 390 00:20:20,750 --> 00:20:23,921 The second I heard her voice I knew I couldn't go back. 391 00:20:24,922 --> 00:20:29,094 -But how am I ever going to live here? -Now, it's just temporary, Niles. 392 00:20:29,302 --> 00:20:31,471 She can't drag this divorce out forever. 393 00:20:32,222 --> 00:20:35,058 You know, Niles, perhaps this place 394 00:20:35,225 --> 00:20:38,062 is the price you'll have to pay for your freedom. 395 00:20:39,856 --> 00:20:41,733 Well, it's worth that. 396 00:20:41,941 --> 00:20:45,362 Well, that's the way to look at it. So let's have a toast to that. 397 00:20:45,571 --> 00:20:47,865 Thank you, Dad. 398 00:20:50,242 --> 00:20:52,203 You know, I never did sign my lease. 399 00:20:52,370 --> 00:20:55,582 I suppose now is as good a time as any. 400 00:20:57,333 --> 00:20:59,712 Niles, perhaps this will make it easier. 401 00:21:01,422 --> 00:21:03,674 A little housewarming gift. 402 00:21:06,052 --> 00:21:08,096 Thank you. 403 00:21:09,556 --> 00:21:11,266 There we go. 404 00:21:12,559 --> 00:21:14,270 Thanks, Dad. 405 00:21:14,437 --> 00:21:16,689 -Thank you. -Okay. 406 00:21:16,856 --> 00:21:19,358 Here's looking at you, kids. 407 00:21:24,281 --> 00:21:25,365 You know, Niles, 408 00:21:25,574 --> 00:21:28,159 you may have to sleep here, but you don't have to eat here. 409 00:21:28,243 --> 00:21:29,788 How does Cigare Volant sound? 410 00:21:29,996 --> 00:21:31,372 Ah! Music to my ears. 411 00:21:31,539 --> 00:21:33,290 I can't go in that place without a jacket. 412 00:21:33,374 --> 00:21:35,292 Maybe we should paw through that closet. 413 00:21:35,376 --> 00:21:37,926 I bet Gary's got a jacket that'll match those pants. 414 00:21:38,506 --> 00:21:42,426 -Oh, here we are. -Yeah! Look at that. That's great. 415 00:21:46,348 --> 00:21:48,850 [INAUDIBLE]