1 00:00:08,074 --> 00:00:09,542 Roz... Roz... 2 00:00:10,043 --> 00:00:11,044 (group cheering) 3 00:00:11,544 --> 00:00:14,080 Roz, you just missed the classic prank of all time. 4 00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:15,915 I'll admit it, this was my masterpiece. 5 00:00:15,915 --> 00:00:17,650 Oh, who, who, who'd you get? 6 00:00:18,051 --> 00:00:19,052 Way to go, Bulldog. 7 00:00:19,052 --> 00:00:20,053 (barks and snickers) 8 00:00:20,053 --> 00:00:21,121 There he is! 9 00:00:21,554 --> 00:00:23,056 (both laughing) 10 00:00:23,456 --> 00:00:26,026 I got this friend down at the impound lot 11 00:00:26,026 --> 00:00:28,028 who came across a smashed-up BMW -- 12 00:00:28,028 --> 00:00:30,030 same make and model and Frasier's. 13 00:00:30,530 --> 00:00:31,331 You didn't! 14 00:00:31,531 --> 00:00:32,565 You got Frasier! 15 00:00:32,565 --> 00:00:35,068 I had his car towed from the garage 16 00:00:35,068 --> 00:00:36,936 the wreck put in its place. 17 00:00:36,936 --> 00:00:38,238 (laughing) 18 00:00:38,238 --> 00:00:40,306 The doc totally freaked when he saw it. 19 00:00:40,306 --> 00:00:41,274 First, he started swearing 20 00:00:41,741 --> 00:00:42,809 then he implored the heavens 21 00:00:42,809 --> 00:00:44,310 and just when his lips started trembling 22 00:00:44,744 --> 00:00:46,579 Bulldog comes out, tells him it's all a prank . 23 00:00:46,846 --> 00:00:49,916 Hey, Bulldog observes the mercy rule. 24 00:00:49,916 --> 00:00:51,718 Besides, I got the whole thing on tape. 25 00:00:51,718 --> 00:00:53,553 (laughing) 26 00:00:57,057 --> 00:01:00,560 Admit it, Doc. I got you good. 27 00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:02,562 Come on, say it. 28 00:01:02,562 --> 00:01:05,010 Bulldog's the best. 29 00:01:05,010 --> 00:01:08,268 Okay, okay, how about the bitch dance I taught you? 30 00:01:08,268 --> 00:01:09,269 (snickering) 31 00:01:09,702 --> 00:01:10,703 (laughing) 32 00:01:11,071 --> 00:01:12,138 At least give me one up high. 33 00:01:12,639 --> 00:01:15,108 Come on... ah, come on, don't leave me hanging, Doc. 34 00:01:15,108 --> 00:01:17,544 Where's your Halloween spirit? 35 00:01:17,877 --> 00:01:19,946 Don't worry, it'll be here waiting for you. 36 00:01:19,946 --> 00:01:20,947 (snickers) 37 00:01:24,117 --> 00:01:28,688 For the record, I knew immediately it was not my car. 38 00:01:28,688 --> 00:01:30,690 Mine has a bumper sticker on it that says: 39 00:01:30,690 --> 00:01:33,093 "I am pro-opera and I vote." 40 00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:35,962 Frasier, you've got to admit it was clever. 41 00:01:35,962 --> 00:01:37,430 I admit nothing. That is the last 42 00:01:37,430 --> 00:01:39,732 we shall discuss of it. We have a show to do. 43 00:01:39,933 --> 00:01:42,469 Good afternoon, Seattle 44 00:01:42,869 --> 00:01:44,437 and welcome to the Halloween edition 45 00:01:44,437 --> 00:01:45,939 of the Dr. Frasier Crane Show. 46 00:01:45,939 --> 00:01:49,909 Today, we will be discussing the topic of fears. 47 00:01:49,909 --> 00:01:52,312 Are they irrational hindrances or... 48 00:01:52,312 --> 00:01:54,314 evolutionary tools. 49 00:01:54,314 --> 00:01:56,316 Hmm. 50 00:01:56,316 --> 00:01:59,619 The surprising answer... after these words. 51 00:02:01,454 --> 00:02:02,956 FRASIER (on tape): My car! 52 00:02:02,956 --> 00:02:05,458 Oh, not my car! 53 00:02:05,959 --> 00:02:07,727 What did they do to you? 54 00:02:07,727 --> 00:02:08,995 My baby! 55 00:02:10,330 --> 00:02:14,000 Whenever you're ready. 56 00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:16,836 (door shuts) 57 00:02:20,807 --> 00:02:22,876 (knocking) 58 00:02:22,876 --> 00:02:24,310 (doorbell ringing) 59 00:02:24,310 --> 00:02:25,845 Did you find something? 60 00:02:25,845 --> 00:02:28,581 Do you think they'll take soy sauce packets? 61 00:02:28,581 --> 00:02:31,284 Who keeps ringing the doorbell? 62 00:02:31,784 --> 00:02:32,685 Mum! Shh! 63 00:02:32,685 --> 00:02:34,387 (quietly): It's trick-or-treaters. 64 00:02:34,621 --> 00:02:35,555 It's okay, they're gone. 65 00:02:35,555 --> 00:02:37,123 Well, why didn't you let them in? 66 00:02:37,123 --> 00:02:40,560 Because someone forgot to get Halloween candy. 67 00:02:40,927 --> 00:02:42,495 Although someone else could've picked it up 68 00:02:42,962 --> 00:02:44,397 since she was already in the store. 69 00:02:44,397 --> 00:02:46,799 Well, that would override the duty list 70 00:02:47,300 --> 00:02:49,569 that someone insisted on implementing. 71 00:02:49,569 --> 00:02:51,337 If this is what you two call a fight 72 00:02:51,838 --> 00:02:53,273 you're not fit to be married. 73 00:02:54,974 --> 00:02:57,677 I once held your father's head underwater and... 74 00:02:57,977 --> 00:02:58,511 (doorbell rings) 75 00:02:59,045 --> 00:03:00,513 Shh! Oh, for heaven's sake! 76 00:03:00,513 --> 00:03:03,950 We haven't got any candy! Shove off! 77 00:03:04,984 --> 00:03:07,487 Great. Now they know we're here. 78 00:03:07,487 --> 00:03:08,755 (doorbell rings) 79 00:03:08,955 --> 00:03:11,491 That's precisely what's wrong with this country. 80 00:03:11,491 --> 00:03:13,993 Everyone's afraid to stand up to the children. 81 00:03:13,993 --> 00:03:15,995 Trick or treat. 82 00:03:15,995 --> 00:03:17,463 Didn't you hear? 83 00:03:17,463 --> 00:03:18,898 We've got no candy! 84 00:03:18,898 --> 00:03:21,334 We can offer you hotel soaps. 85 00:03:21,334 --> 00:03:23,336 But it's Halloween. 86 00:03:23,336 --> 00:03:25,672 I dress up, you give me candy. 87 00:03:25,672 --> 00:03:28,341 That costume's supposed to be scary? 88 00:03:28,341 --> 00:03:30,577 No. Is yours? 89 00:03:33,346 --> 00:03:34,414 Oh, a nice bite into an onion 90 00:03:34,414 --> 00:03:36,316 is what that mouth of yours deserves. 91 00:03:36,649 --> 00:03:39,052 If you don't have treats, you're going to get a trick. 92 00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:40,353 Do your worst! 93 00:03:40,353 --> 00:03:41,688 I'’’m not afraid of you. 94 00:03:41,688 --> 00:03:44,857 Honestly! 95 00:03:46,626 --> 00:03:47,860 Okay, well, maybe I'll 96 00:03:47,860 --> 00:03:49,195 go pick up some candy after all. 97 00:03:49,696 --> 00:03:53,199 (loud splattering) 98 00:04:04,444 --> 00:04:07,280 Okay, I'm going to need my slicker and my squash goggles. 99 00:04:14,120 --> 00:04:15,622 FRASIER: Good morning, Roz. 100 00:04:15,622 --> 00:04:16,589 May I join you? 101 00:04:17,123 --> 00:04:18,057 Sure, Frasier. 102 00:04:18,057 --> 00:04:20,126 Well, I'm glad to see you're not sulking today. 103 00:04:20,126 --> 00:04:22,562 Yes, well, I had a little time to think about it 104 00:04:23,129 --> 00:04:25,431 and I've decided to put Bulldog's prank behind me. 105 00:04:25,431 --> 00:04:27,233 That's very mature. 106 00:04:27,233 --> 00:04:28,568 I'm not finished. 107 00:04:28,901 --> 00:04:30,403 By visiting upon him a prank 108 00:04:30,903 --> 00:04:32,438 that is ten times more dastardly 109 00:04:32,438 --> 00:04:34,474 Look at this. 110 00:04:37,243 --> 00:04:39,812 It looks like a car with a balloon tied to it. 111 00:04:39,812 --> 00:04:41,247 Precisely! 112 00:04:41,581 --> 00:04:44,083 I will tie a red balloon to the antenna of Bulldog's car 113 00:04:44,651 --> 00:04:48,087 every time his precious Seahawks lose a game. 114 00:04:48,421 --> 00:04:49,856 Over time... 115 00:04:50,156 --> 00:04:53,726 the conditioned response will become ingrained in his psyche. 116 00:04:53,726 --> 00:04:56,162 Eventually, the mere sight of a red balloon... 117 00:04:56,162 --> 00:04:59,098 will bring about in him an inexplicable sense 118 00:04:59,532 --> 00:05:02,035 of loss. 119 00:05:02,368 --> 00:05:07,206 Check and mate 120 00:05:07,407 --> 00:05:08,975 Isn't that kind of out there? 121 00:05:08,975 --> 00:05:10,376 That's the point. 122 00:05:10,710 --> 00:05:13,279 Well, of course I could resort to any of your basic pranks: 123 00:05:13,279 --> 00:05:14,781 hand in warm water and whatnot-- 124 00:05:14,781 --> 00:05:17,283 believe me, I have an intimate knowledge of all of them-- 125 00:05:17,717 --> 00:05:19,619 but what I'm looking for is something unmistakably 126 00:05:19,919 --> 00:05:21,487 me. 127 00:05:21,988 --> 00:05:24,757 A signature prank, if you will, hmm? 128 00:05:24,957 --> 00:05:26,526 Why don't you just forget about revenge 129 00:05:26,526 --> 00:05:28,294 and give him his two minutes in the sun? 130 00:05:28,528 --> 00:05:29,095 At my expense? 131 00:05:29,595 --> 00:05:30,596 Look at his life. 132 00:05:31,030 --> 00:05:32,098 You guys used to be equals 133 00:05:32,598 --> 00:05:35,601 now he's stuck downstairs that dark, musty archives room. 134 00:05:35,601 --> 00:05:38,037 You must have some sympathy for him, don't you? 135 00:05:38,438 --> 00:05:39,505 Dark musty archives. 136 00:05:39,505 --> 00:05:41,507 I think I can use that 137 00:05:43,009 --> 00:05:44,510 Hello, all. Hi. 138 00:05:44,510 --> 00:05:45,478 Hello, Niles. 139 00:05:45,978 --> 00:05:47,013 Why do we have to stop here? 140 00:05:47,013 --> 00:05:48,514 I could make coffee at home. 141 00:05:48,514 --> 00:05:50,016 Now, now. 142 00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:52,518 It's good to get out of the house-- 143 00:05:52,518 --> 00:05:54,887 get some fresh air, exercise those lungs. 144 00:05:55,154 --> 00:05:57,223 My lungs are as strong as ever. 145 00:05:57,223 --> 00:06:01,227 Just yesterday, I finished a whole cigarette in two drags. 146 00:06:03,796 --> 00:06:06,332 One off me record. 147 00:06:06,733 --> 00:06:07,800 What's this? 148 00:06:08,301 --> 00:06:09,802 I'm devising the ultimate prank 149 00:06:09,802 --> 00:06:11,304 to get my revenge on Bulldog. 150 00:06:11,304 --> 00:06:13,306 Ah, well, just beware the dangers 151 00:06:13,306 --> 00:06:15,074 of juvenile one-upsmanship. 152 00:06:15,074 --> 00:06:18,344 Only last night, Mrs. Moon challenged a trick-or-treater 153 00:06:18,845 --> 00:06:21,280 and he responded by pelting our door with eggs. 154 00:06:21,681 --> 00:06:23,750 Yeah, but I got the little monster back 155 00:06:23,750 --> 00:06:27,754 by puttin' a big, greasy glob of Vaseline on his doorknob. 156 00:06:29,288 --> 00:06:30,857 You said you'd put an e 157 00:06:30,857 --> 00:06:32,358 Hence, the Vaseline. 158 00:06:32,358 --> 00:06:35,094 Mum, he's a child. 159 00:06:35,094 --> 00:06:37,864 Well, it's time he learned you don't mess with Gertrude Moon 160 00:06:37,864 --> 00:06:39,766 without incurring my wrath. 161 00:06:40,133 --> 00:06:42,201 Now, excuse me. 162 00:06:42,201 --> 00:06:44,203 I require cocoa. 163 00:06:46,205 --> 00:06:48,541 You know, I think she has the right attitude 164 00:06:48,541 --> 00:06:50,376 If I expect Bulldog to leave me alone 165 00:06:50,376 --> 00:06:52,712 I've got to show him he's dealing with a superior intellect. 166 00:06:52,712 --> 00:06:54,547 Show them the balloon car. 167 00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:03,890 I'm sure da Vinci's early no were full of laughs, too. 168 00:07:03,890 --> 00:07:06,893 Excuse me. I have devising to do. 169 00:07:09,162 --> 00:07:11,731 That'll be... $32.03. 170 00:07:11,731 --> 00:07:14,033 For one drink? 171 00:07:14,233 --> 00:07:15,301 Your grandson ordered a bunch of cakes 172 00:07:15,301 --> 00:07:16,736 and he said it was all on you. 173 00:07:17,069 --> 00:07:20,006 Thanks for the treats, Grandma! 174 00:07:20,006 --> 00:07:21,908 Hey...! 175 00:07:26,746 --> 00:07:30,917 Oh, let's see the little sod get to school without these. 176 00:07:30,917 --> 00:07:32,752 Oh, this should settle it. 177 00:07:40,660 --> 00:07:42,361 (thunder crashes) 178 00:07:45,231 --> 00:07:47,667 Is anybody there? 179 00:07:47,667 --> 00:07:50,102 (deadpan): Oh. Zombies. 180 00:07:50,102 --> 00:07:51,604 The living dead. 181 00:07:52,104 --> 00:07:55,107 Help. Help 182 00:07:55,107 --> 00:07:57,443 FRASIER: Everyone hold, please. 183 00:08:00,112 --> 00:08:02,448 Zombie Number Two, what are you doing? 184 00:08:02,949 --> 00:08:04,951 I'm scaring Bulldog? 185 00:08:04,951 --> 00:08:07,954 I see. 186 00:08:07,954 --> 00:08:10,957 Is that what zombies do? They scare people? 187 00:08:10,957 --> 00:08:12,925 Um... Wrong! 188 00:08:13,359 --> 00:08:17,296 They eat brains, and that's what scares people. 189 00:08:17,597 --> 00:08:19,665 All right, now, this is our dress rehearsal. 190 00:08:19,665 --> 00:08:21,434 Let's please try to get this right. 191 00:08:21,634 --> 00:08:23,636 Bulldog comes in, he hears noises 192 00:08:24,136 --> 00:08:27,073 zombies go after his brain... 193 00:08:27,073 --> 00:08:28,941 and his terror is caught on videotape 194 00:08:28,941 --> 00:08:31,444 for us all to enjoy at a later date, all right? 195 00:08:31,944 --> 00:08:33,946 Now, let's try this again. First marks, please. 196 00:08:33,946 --> 00:08:35,248 Oh, geez, Fras 197 00:08:35,481 --> 00:08:36,549 This is the fourth time through. 198 00:08:36,549 --> 00:08:38,050 Can somebody else play Bulldog now? 199 00:08:38,484 --> 00:08:39,485 Dad, you said you'd help me with this. 200 00:08:39,485 --> 00:08:41,487 You said we were going to do a practical joke. 201 00:08:41,487 --> 00:08:42,321 I thought it'd be fun. 202 00:08:42,588 --> 00:08:44,490 Whatever gave you that idea? 203 00:08:46,058 --> 00:08:48,127 Todd... 204 00:08:48,127 --> 00:08:50,396 I am getting "dead" from you 205 00:08:50,396 --> 00:08:53,165 but I'm not getting "undead." 206 00:08:53,599 --> 00:08:55,501 Still. 207 00:08:55,501 --> 00:08:59,972 Let's try this, then. 208 00:09:00,439 --> 00:09:05,011 After rehearsal, I want each of you to write a paragraph... 209 00:09:05,011 --> 00:09:09,882 detailing who your character was when he or she was alive... 210 00:09:09,882 --> 00:09:12,218 how they died... 211 00:09:12,218 --> 00:09:16,022 and why they are now after Bulldog's brain. 212 00:09:16,322 --> 00:09:17,890 Honestly, Roz, you know, you haven't given me 213 00:09:17,890 --> 00:09:18,891 much to work with here. 214 00:09:18,891 --> 00:09:21,160 There are the worst actors I've ever seen! 215 00:09:21,360 --> 00:09:23,930 I'm sorry, but the Royal Zombie Company just left town 216 00:09:24,397 --> 00:09:26,432 with its all-zombie production of Hamlet. 217 00:09:28,768 --> 00:09:30,903 How many more times are we going to do this? 218 00:09:31,103 --> 00:09:34,173 Why is it that whenever Bulldog pulls a practical joke 219 00:09:34,173 --> 00:09:35,174 you all applaud him 220 00:09:35,675 --> 00:09:38,177 as if he's won some sort of bowl or cup 221 00:09:38,177 --> 00:09:39,545 or other sports dish? 222 00:09:39,545 --> 00:09:41,380 But when I ask you to give up a single Sunday 223 00:09:41,380 --> 00:09:42,281 all I get is complaints. 224 00:09:42,615 --> 00:09:43,683 Because you keep turning it into work. 225 00:09:43,683 --> 00:09:45,184 This is supposed to be fun! 226 00:09:45,184 --> 00:09:46,652 Like a day at the beach. 227 00:09:47,053 --> 00:09:49,088 You do this kind of thing all the time. Like when? 228 00:09:49,088 --> 00:09:52,358 Like the last time we went to the beach. 229 00:09:52,558 --> 00:09:55,428 A lot of people bring rakes! 230 00:09:58,197 --> 00:09:59,765 Frasier, it's not too late to back out of this. 231 00:10:00,199 --> 00:10:01,167 Now, face it 232 00:10:01,500 --> 00:10:02,935 jokes just aren't your specialty. 233 00:10:03,202 --> 00:10:04,270 What is that supposed to mean? 234 00:10:04,270 --> 00:10:05,271 Well, what she means, son 235 00:10:05,271 --> 00:10:07,540 is that we all have our different blessings 236 00:10:07,740 --> 00:10:09,241 and Bulldog's good at jokes and fun. 237 00:10:09,241 --> 00:10:11,310 You're good at... 238 00:10:11,310 --> 00:10:12,812 reading and, uh... 239 00:10:12,812 --> 00:10:16,182 telling people about the things you read. 240 00:10:16,182 --> 00:10:18,517 Are you saying that you think I can't pull this off? 241 00:10:18,884 --> 00:10:19,919 Oh, I wouldn't put it that way 242 00:10:20,353 --> 00:10:21,854 I would. 243 00:10:21,854 --> 00:10:23,756 But I worked this out to the last detail! 244 00:10:24,256 --> 00:10:25,091 Nothing can go wrong! 245 00:10:25,091 --> 00:10:26,859 Everything's going to go wrong! 246 00:10:26,859 --> 00:10:29,261 For one thing, Bulldog's going to know something's up 247 00:10:29,261 --> 00:10:31,130 'cause Kenny hardly ever makes him work at night. 248 00:10:31,430 --> 00:10:32,431 And then, look at all these cameras 249 00:10:32,932 --> 00:10:34,433 and all these wires-- what if he spots these? 250 00:10:34,433 --> 00:10:36,502 And the zombies, as soon as he sees them 251 00:10:36,502 --> 00:10:38,938 . he's going to know it's a prank, 'cause he just pranked you 252 00:10:39,271 --> 00:10:42,308 And there are no such things as zombies! 253 00:10:50,983 --> 00:10:54,487 You, sir... are released! 254 00:10:56,589 --> 00:10:57,957 And you, as well! 255 00:10:57,957 --> 00:10:59,258 I'll pull this thing off by myself 256 00:10:59,792 --> 00:11:02,061 proving that you don't know what you're talking about! 257 00:11:02,261 --> 00:11:04,130 I don't need any of you! 258 00:11:04,130 --> 00:11:06,932 Wait, zombies, I do need you. 259 00:11:06,932 --> 00:11:09,235 But no one else! 260 00:11:09,235 --> 00:11:10,036 I'll show all of you! 261 00:11:10,536 --> 00:11:12,038 You mark my words! 262 00:11:12,038 --> 00:11:14,306 Tomorrow night, I get my revenge! 263 00:11:14,306 --> 00:11:17,143 (thunder crashes) 264 00:11:17,643 --> 00:11:20,146 Ah, good, the effects machine's working again. 265 00:11:20,646 --> 00:11:21,647 All right, everyone... 266 00:11:21,647 --> 00:11:23,649 back to your first marks. 267 00:11:27,019 --> 00:11:28,587 (doorbell chimes) 268 00:11:28,587 --> 00:11:30,089 Where have you been?! 269 00:11:30,089 --> 00:11:32,458 I'm sorry. I had a hard ti me finding this place. 270 00:11:32,458 --> 00:11:35,061 I checked the directory for "Crane" 271 00:11:35,061 --> 00:11:35,828 but it had "Old Bat" 272 00:11:36,328 --> 00:11:37,697 next to this apartment number. 273 00:11:39,465 --> 00:11:43,002 A little obvious, but not bad. 274 00:11:43,002 --> 00:11:45,538 I want you to deliver this 275 00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:47,973 Baby-I-Have-To-Tinkle doll 276 00:11:47,973 --> 00:11:51,977 to Jason White, Floyd Middle School. 277 00:11:51,977 --> 00:11:53,979 This is the address. 278 00:11:53,979 --> 00:11:57,817 I mean, he should be in gym class about now 279 00:11:57,817 --> 00:11:59,185 I don't think I'm allowed 280 00:11:59,185 --> 00:12:00,686 to just walk into the school, ma'am. 281 00:12:00,686 --> 00:12:03,656 Oh, it's okay. I'm his grandmother. 282 00:12:03,656 --> 00:12:05,591 And you have to say this: 283 00:12:05,591 --> 00:12:08,494 "Your mommy said bring this to you at school 284 00:12:08,494 --> 00:12:09,995 "to lift your spirits. 285 00:12:09,995 --> 00:12:13,799 See, your dolly has accidents, too." 286 00:12:13,799 --> 00:12:16,001 You really want me to say that? 287 00:12:16,001 --> 00:12:17,536 Yes, and very loudly. 288 00:12:17,536 --> 00:12:20,339 The poor thing's hard of hearing. 289 00:12:22,675 --> 00:12:23,676 Yes! 290 00:12:30,716 --> 00:12:34,220 Todd, take off that baseball cap. 291 00:12:34,220 --> 00:12:36,555 You're undead, not uncouth 292 00:12:38,424 --> 00:12:39,291 All right, everyone. 293 00:12:39,291 --> 00:12:42,661 Step lively, look sharp. 294 00:12:42,661 --> 00:12:44,163 It's almost show time. 295 00:12:44,163 --> 00:12:47,166 Give me a final room-tone check, please 296 00:12:47,166 --> 00:12:48,100 and take your marks. 297 00:12:48,100 --> 00:12:50,536 Hey, Fras. 298 00:12:50,536 --> 00:12:52,905 Oh, hello. 299 00:12:52,905 --> 00:12:55,074 Come to watch me fail, I suppose. 300 00:12:55,074 --> 00:12:56,876 No, we just wanted to come join you. 301 00:12:56,876 --> 00:12:58,738 We're sorry about that stuff we said yesterday. 302 00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:02,982 It's long overdue. 303 00:13:02,982 --> 00:13:05,785 Maybe I don't want you here. 304 00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:06,685 What do you mean? 305 00:13:06,685 --> 00:13:08,621 You abandoned me in my hour of need. 306 00:13:08,621 --> 00:13:10,589 Now you're here to revel in my success 307 00:13:11,090 --> 00:13:12,992 just like in Boswell's Life of Johnson. 308 00:13:12,992 --> 00:13:14,894 What? 309 00:13:14,894 --> 00:13:18,330 It was something I read. 310 00:13:20,766 --> 00:13:24,770 I guess we deserve that, whatever the hell it means. 311 00:13:24,770 --> 00:13:27,773 Come on, Frasier, we're sorry. 312 00:13:27,773 --> 00:13:29,175 Just let us watch. 313 00:13:29,175 --> 00:13:32,077 All right. Apology accepted. 314 00:13:32,077 --> 00:13:33,846 You may observe in silence. 315 00:13:33,846 --> 00:13:36,448 Make yourselves comfortable 316 00:13:36,448 --> 00:13:38,751 and prepare to witness a man 317 00:13:38,751 --> 00:13:41,754 brought to the very edge of madness! 318 00:13:45,391 --> 00:13:47,760 I think he's already there. 319 00:13:51,130 --> 00:13:53,132 Mum, we're off to the symphony. 320 00:13:53,132 --> 00:13:55,901 Haven't the Germans punished us enough? 321 00:13:57,670 --> 00:13:59,672 Ooh! Bloody hell! 322 00:14:00,172 --> 00:14:02,041 Where did this come from? 323 00:14:02,041 --> 00:14:05,611 Oh, you must have crossed someone. 324 00:14:06,946 --> 00:14:07,880 Mother. 325 00:14:07,880 --> 00:14:09,849 Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. 326 00:14:09,849 --> 00:14:11,817 We were just coming down the hall 327 00:14:11,817 --> 00:14:13,285 and we saw you open your door. 328 00:14:13,819 --> 00:14:14,720 This is our trash can. 329 00:14:14,720 --> 00:14:16,121 What was it doing there? 330 00:14:16,121 --> 00:14:16,989 Jason, get back here! 331 00:14:16,989 --> 00:14:19,825 It seems our children have been feuding. 332 00:14:19,825 --> 00:14:21,627 We're very embarrassed 333 00:14:21,627 --> 00:14:23,696 You're embarrassed? Meet our daughter. 334 00:14:28,500 --> 00:14:30,769 Hello. 335 00:14:30,769 --> 00:14:32,171 I have a lot of homework. 336 00:14:32,171 --> 00:14:33,138 Stay! 337 00:14:33,138 --> 00:14:35,641 Jason, have you been fighting with this woman? 338 00:14:36,175 --> 00:14:37,176 Well, she broke my bike 339 00:14:37,676 --> 00:14:40,446 and made me have to see a counselor at school. 340 00:14:41,647 --> 00:14:43,148 I think I left something in the kitchen. 341 00:14:43,148 --> 00:14:45,084 Stay! 342 00:14:45,084 --> 00:14:46,485 I am an adult. 343 00:14:46,485 --> 00:14:48,854 I can do anything I want! 344 00:14:48,854 --> 00:14:51,223 No. While you're living under our roof 345 00:14:51,223 --> 00:14:52,558 you'll follow our rules. 346 00:14:53,826 --> 00:14:56,295 You two should be ashamed of yourselves. 347 00:14:56,295 --> 00:14:57,563 What if someone got hurt? 348 00:14:57,563 --> 00:14:58,330 Good. 349 00:14:58,330 --> 00:15:00,833 Jason! You are one second away 350 00:15:00,833 --> 00:15:03,335 from losing your broadband connection. 351 00:15:03,335 --> 00:15:05,337 Now, apologize and shake hands. 352 00:15:08,507 --> 00:15:09,975 Pish. 353 00:15:09,975 --> 00:15:12,411 What if I told you you couldn't smoke your pipes 354 00:15:12,411 --> 00:15:13,379 in your room anymore? 355 00:15:13,379 --> 00:15:15,848 I'm sorry. Sorry. 356 00:15:17,683 --> 00:15:19,952 Now you two are go ing to clean up this mess. 357 00:15:19,952 --> 00:15:22,187 And Jason, come straight home when you're finished. 358 00:15:22,187 --> 00:15:26,091 This place better be spotless by the time we get back. 359 00:15:28,460 --> 00:15:30,863 I wish I was all grown up and I wouldn't have 360 00:15:30,863 --> 00:15:33,399 to follow their stupid rules. 361 00:15:33,899 --> 00:15:36,402 Oh, nothing changes, trust me. 362 00:15:38,904 --> 00:15:40,673 You know... 363 00:15:40,673 --> 00:15:42,541 my mom hates bugs. 364 00:15:42,541 --> 00:15:44,310 She screams like a girl. 365 00:15:44,310 --> 00:15:48,414 So does my son-in-law. 366 00:15:48,414 --> 00:15:50,649 I know where we can find some crickets. 367 00:15:50,649 --> 00:15:53,986 No! Now, we should do as we're told 368 00:15:53,986 --> 00:15:55,888 and start cleaning up. 369 00:15:56,388 --> 00:15:57,323 Okay. 370 00:15:57,323 --> 00:16:00,793 That way they won't be expecting it. 371 00:16:01,293 --> 00:16:02,795 (both giggle) 372 00:16:08,300 --> 00:16:09,735 This is so great! I can't wait. 373 00:16:09,735 --> 00:16:10,803 I'm getting goose bumps. 374 00:16:10,803 --> 00:16:14,306 Feel me. Feel me. 375 00:16:14,807 --> 00:16:16,809 Kenny, what was the condition 376 00:16:17,309 --> 00:16:18,674 of my letting you watch? 377 00:16:20,879 --> 00:16:24,683 There he is! 378 00:16:24,683 --> 00:16:27,419 Cue "creaking noise one." 379 00:16:27,419 --> 00:16:29,221 (creaking noise) 380 00:16:32,224 --> 00:16:34,727 Hello? 381 00:16:34,727 --> 00:16:35,661 Who's there? 382 00:16:35,661 --> 00:16:38,564 Cue "creaking noise two." 383 00:16:38,564 --> 00:16:40,499 (different creaking noise) 384 00:16:44,803 --> 00:16:48,440 Now let the horror begin. 385 00:16:50,275 --> 00:16:52,111 (shrieking) 386 00:16:52,111 --> 00:16:53,612 Yes! 387 00:16:53,612 --> 00:16:55,948 How do you like that, you big baby?! 388 00:16:55,948 --> 00:16:57,549 (Frasier laughing) 389 00:17:00,285 --> 00:17:01,286 Get back! 390 00:17:01,286 --> 00:17:03,255 (gunshot) 391 00:17:03,255 --> 00:17:04,123 Oh, my God! 392 00:17:04,123 --> 00:17:05,324 Oh, my God! 393 00:17:05,324 --> 00:17:06,158 Call 911! 394 00:17:06,625 --> 00:17:08,627 Call 911! 395 00:17:08,627 --> 00:17:11,196 Oh, my God! 396 00:17:11,196 --> 00:17:14,199 Don't worry about it, Kenny. It's just a joke. 397 00:17:14,199 --> 00:17:15,701 What are you talking about? 398 00:17:16,201 --> 00:17:17,002 It's a fake gun! 399 00:17:17,002 --> 00:17:17,636 What?! 400 00:17:17,970 --> 00:17:19,905 It's a fake gun! 401 00:17:19,905 --> 00:17:21,306 What about the bullets? 402 00:17:23,308 --> 00:17:24,309 It's a joke. 403 00:17:24,309 --> 00:17:26,779 Bulldog found out about Frasier's prank 404 00:17:26,779 --> 00:17:29,281 so we set him up. 405 00:17:29,281 --> 00:17:30,249 That is awesome! 406 00:17:30,249 --> 00:17:32,985 I can't believe he fell for it 407 00:17:32,985 --> 00:17:34,820 Come on, we got to tell Frasier what's going on. 408 00:17:34,820 --> 00:17:35,821 You guys go ahead. 409 00:17:35,821 --> 00:17:37,856 I think I'm going to stay here and puke. 410 00:17:40,759 --> 00:17:45,164 Stop! Stop! It was all a joke! 411 00:17:45,164 --> 00:17:47,966 Oh, my God! What have I done?! 412 00:17:47,966 --> 00:17:50,235 What's the big deal? He was already a zombie. 413 00:17:50,235 --> 00:17:52,004 (raucous laughter) 414 00:17:52,004 --> 00:17:53,672 Are you insane?! Call an ambulance! 415 00:17:53,672 --> 00:17:55,007 (yells) 416 00:17:58,010 --> 00:18:00,512 (laughing) 417 00:18:01,847 --> 00:18:03,982 What's going on here? 418 00:18:03,982 --> 00:18:05,117 Wave to the camera, Frasier. 419 00:18:05,117 --> 00:18:07,519 What? 420 00:18:07,519 --> 00:18:09,354 Got you again, all on tape. 421 00:18:09,354 --> 00:18:11,590 Who's the king? 422 00:18:11,590 --> 00:18:13,959 That isn't funny! I could've had a heart attack! 423 00:18:13,959 --> 00:18:17,129 Oh, sorry, Fras. We just couldn't resist. 424 00:18:17,129 --> 00:18:19,398 Well, at least nobody was hurt. 425 00:18:19,398 --> 00:18:21,900 You've bested me, Bulldog-- again. 426 00:18:21,900 --> 00:18:23,902 Dr. Crane, I think I hurt my back. 427 00:18:23,902 --> 00:18:24,736 What? 428 00:18:24,736 --> 00:18:26,905 (all gasp) 429 00:18:26,905 --> 00:18:27,739 Oh, my God! 430 00:18:27,739 --> 00:18:29,208 Someone call an ambulance! 431 00:18:29,208 --> 00:18:30,709 Where's the phone?! Where's the phone?! 432 00:18:30,709 --> 00:18:33,946 Get the first-aid kit out of the closet! 433 00:18:33,946 --> 00:18:35,214 No, no! Not the...! 434 00:18:35,214 --> 00:18:38,383 (shrieks) 435 00:18:38,383 --> 00:18:40,719 What the hell's going on down here?! 436 00:18:40,719 --> 00:18:42,054 Quiet, everybody! 437 00:18:42,054 --> 00:18:44,556 Hello. Yes, I'd like to report 438 00:18:44,556 --> 00:18:47,392 the greatest practical joke ever! 439 00:18:47,392 --> 00:18:49,261 You better send a firetruck 440 00:18:49,261 --> 00:18:52,164 because you guys just got burned! 441 00:18:54,833 --> 00:18:58,170 (laughing) 442 00:18:58,170 --> 00:18:59,071 Wait. What? 443 00:18:59,071 --> 00:19:00,572 Hi, Roz. 444 00:19:00,572 --> 00:19:01,974 Oh! 445 00:19:03,876 --> 00:19:07,379 You should see the look on your faces! 446 00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:08,881 This is truly a classic. 447 00:19:08,881 --> 00:19:11,383 This was all just a joke? 448 00:19:11,383 --> 00:19:12,384 Awesome! 449 00:19:16,755 --> 00:19:18,257 Nice work, Doc. 450 00:19:18,257 --> 00:19:19,758 Likewise, Bulldog. 451 00:19:19,758 --> 00:19:22,761 Think I can get a copy of this for my demo reel? 452 00:19:22,761 --> 00:19:23,762 Sure thing, Todd. 453 00:19:24,263 --> 00:19:26,165 You've come a long way in a short time, young man. 454 00:19:28,367 --> 00:19:29,935 Well, Frasier, I'm speechless 455 00:19:29,935 --> 00:19:31,637 You totally had us going. 456 00:19:31,637 --> 00:19:32,971 I can't believe it! 457 00:19:32,971 --> 00:19:33,972 Admit it, Roz 458 00:19:33,972 --> 00:19:35,874 can I pull off a practical joke or what? 459 00:19:35,874 --> 00:19:36,775 I just don't understand. 460 00:19:36,775 --> 00:19:38,177 Did you guys work together? 461 00:19:38,177 --> 00:19:39,978 Frasier set the whole thing up. 462 00:19:39,978 --> 00:19:41,480 The other day, after you two left 463 00:19:41,480 --> 00:19:42,481 I got to thinking 464 00:19:42,481 --> 00:19:44,983 maybe my joke was aimed at the wrong target. 465 00:19:44,983 --> 00:19:47,319 That's when Bulldog and I joined forces. 466 00:19:47,319 --> 00:19:50,055 But we joined forces with him to get you! 467 00:19:50,055 --> 00:19:52,791 That's exactly what you were supposed to think. 468 00:19:53,625 --> 00:19:55,093 Wow, Fras, I got to give it to you. 469 00:19:55,093 --> 00:19:56,028 This was brilliant. 470 00:19:56,028 --> 00:19:56,962 Thank you, Dad. 471 00:19:56,962 --> 00:19:58,964 What do you say we all go upstairs 472 00:19:58,964 --> 00:19:59,865 and watch the tape? 473 00:19:59,865 --> 00:20:01,800 You guys go ahead. 474 00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:03,135 Bulldog? Yeah? 475 00:20:03,135 --> 00:20:06,438 Technically, I still owe you one. 476 00:20:06,438 --> 00:20:09,308 Face it, Doc, you will never win. 477 00:20:09,308 --> 00:20:10,842 Good work, Noel. 478 00:20:15,514 --> 00:20:18,517 That's why you had to join forces with me. 479 00:20:18,517 --> 00:20:19,451 Huh? 480 00:20:21,253 --> 00:20:23,655 You're right. 481 00:20:23,655 --> 00:20:24,990 All right. 482 00:20:36,868 --> 00:20:39,371 ♪♪ Hey, baby, I hear the blues a-calling ♪♪ 483 00:20:39,371 --> 00:20:42,374 ♪♪ Toss salads and scrambled eggs ♪♪ 484 00:20:42,374 --> 00:20:43,875 Mercy. 485 00:20:43,875 --> 00:20:46,378 ♪♪ And maybe I seem a bit confused ♪♪ 486 00:20:46,378 --> 00:20:49,381 Yeah, maybe, but I got you pegged. 487 00:20:49,381 --> 00:20:50,882 (laughs) 488 00:20:50,882 --> 00:20:52,884 ♪♪ But I don'’’t know what to do ♪♪ 489 00:20:52,884 --> 00:20:56,888 ♪♪ With those toss salads and scrambled eggs ♪♪ 490 00:20:56,888 --> 00:21:00,392 ♪♪ They'’’re calling again . ♪♪ 491 00:21:00,392 --> 00:21:03,895 Scrambled eggs all over my face. 492 00:21:03,895 --> 00:21:05,897 What is a boy to do? 493 00:21:06,398 --> 00:21:09,901 Good night, Seattle! We love you!