1 00:00:01,483 --> 00:00:03,366 I'm so excited we're gonna get to meet 2 00:00:03,400 --> 00:00:05,500 Mr. Sheffield's nanny. 3 00:00:05,830 --> 00:00:08,160 He must've been so cute as a baby 4 00:00:08,500 --> 00:00:09,133 in his little pram 5 00:00:09,166 --> 00:00:10,466 with his little silver pacifier 6 00:00:11,000 --> 00:00:13,830 and his little three-piece diaper. 7 00:00:13,116 --> 00:00:16,200 Oh, yes. He was a little stinker. 8 00:00:16,233 --> 00:00:18,450 I remember his first word-- 9 00:00:18,483 --> 00:00:20,133 "Niles!" 10 00:00:20,166 --> 00:00:21,350 Oh... 11 00:00:21,383 --> 00:00:24,133 MAXWELL: Niles! 12 00:00:24,166 --> 00:00:26,300 We're gonna have to work on his vocabulary. 13 00:00:26,333 --> 00:00:29,300 Ah, Niles, there you are. I want you standing by. 14 00:00:29,333 --> 00:00:31,660 Standing by what, sir? 15 00:00:31,100 --> 00:00:32,183 Me. 16 00:00:32,216 --> 00:00:34,330 I want everything perfect for Nanny. 17 00:00:34,660 --> 00:00:35,116 All right, girls, 18 00:00:35,150 --> 00:00:37,383 let's see your curtsies. 19 00:00:37,416 --> 00:00:39,416 No, no, no. Back straight. 20 00:00:41,000 --> 00:00:44,166 I'm getting the feeling he's done that before. 21 00:00:44,200 --> 00:00:46,160 [DOORBELL RINGS] 22 00:00:46,500 --> 00:00:47,233 Niles, that's the doorbell. 23 00:00:47,266 --> 00:00:50,100 Oh, sir, I would be lost without you. 24 00:01:01,383 --> 00:01:03,350 Nanny Mueller. 25 00:01:03,383 --> 00:01:07,330 Oh, Maxwell,mein Liebchen. 26 00:01:07,660 --> 00:01:09,416 Look how handsome you've become. 27 00:01:09,450 --> 00:01:12,333 You're the image of your father at that age. 28 00:01:12,366 --> 00:01:14,150 He had a head of hair just like yours, 29 00:01:14,183 --> 00:01:17,216 and then, one day... pfft. Kojak. 30 00:01:17,250 --> 00:01:19,466 Nanny, you look wonderful. 31 00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:21,160 I'd like you to meet-- 32 00:01:21,500 --> 00:01:22,450 No. Not another word. 33 00:01:22,483 --> 00:01:25,150 I feel as if I know them. 34 00:01:25,183 --> 00:01:27,300 You must be Margaret. 35 00:01:27,333 --> 00:01:29,233 No, I'm Grace. 36 00:01:29,266 --> 00:01:31,216 Well, if somebody sent me a snapshot once in a while, 37 00:01:31,250 --> 00:01:33,483 maybe I would know them. 38 00:01:34,160 --> 00:01:35,233 I'm Maggie, Nanny Mueller. 39 00:01:35,266 --> 00:01:36,450 Well, button up, dear. 40 00:01:36,483 --> 00:01:41,250 If Victoria can keep her secret, so can you. 41 00:01:41,283 --> 00:01:43,183 And, Brighton. 42 00:01:44,466 --> 00:01:46,233 You call this a handshake? 43 00:01:46,266 --> 00:01:48,383 What are you, a man or a fish? 44 00:01:49,366 --> 00:01:51,166 Actually, I'm a Pisces. 45 00:01:51,200 --> 00:01:53,330 You, young man... 46 00:01:53,660 --> 00:01:56,233 I will be watching. 47 00:01:56,266 --> 00:01:58,383 Otherwise, Maxwell, I'm impressed. 48 00:01:58,416 --> 00:02:00,166 You obviously found yourself 49 00:02:00,200 --> 00:02:03,000 a proper nanny to rear the children. 50 00:02:03,330 --> 00:02:05,266 Brighton, what'd you put down the toilet? 51 00:02:05,300 --> 00:02:07,330 It's all stuffed up. 52 00:02:07,660 --> 00:02:10,830 Oh, you're here already? Hello. 53 00:02:10,116 --> 00:02:12,660 Who is this person, the plumber? 54 00:02:12,100 --> 00:02:13,233 Nanny Mueller, 55 00:02:13,266 --> 00:02:15,366 I'd like you to meet Fran Fine, 56 00:02:15,400 --> 00:02:16,483 the nanny. 57 00:02:17,160 --> 00:02:18,416 Oh. 58 00:02:18,450 --> 00:02:21,100 Charmed. Nice to meet you. 59 00:02:21,133 --> 00:02:23,183 Niles, take the woman's coat. 60 00:02:23,216 --> 00:02:25,116 She's got a sweat moustache. 61 00:02:25,150 --> 00:02:27,000 Oops. My mistake. 62 00:02:31,250 --> 00:02:33,830 ♪♪ She was working In a bridal shop ♪♪ 63 00:02:33,116 --> 00:02:34,300 ♪♪ In Flushing, Queens ♪♪ 64 00:02:34,333 --> 00:02:35,483 ♪♪ Till her boyfriend Kicked her out ♪♪ 65 00:02:36,160 --> 00:02:37,333 ♪♪ In one Of those crushing scenes ♪♪ 66 00:02:37,366 --> 00:02:39,400 ♪♪ What was she to do? Where was she to go? ♪♪ 67 00:02:39,433 --> 00:02:42,116 ♪♪ She was out on her fanny ♪♪ 68 00:02:42,150 --> 00:02:43,333 ♪♪ So over the bridge From Flushing ♪♪ 69 00:02:43,366 --> 00:02:45,330 ♪♪ To the Sheffield's door ♪♪ 70 00:02:45,660 --> 00:02:46,233 ♪♪ She was there to sell makeup ♪♪ 71 00:02:46,266 --> 00:02:47,450 ♪♪ But the father saw more ♪♪ 72 00:02:47,483 --> 00:02:49,330 ♪♪ She had style, she had flair ♪♪ 73 00:02:49,660 --> 00:02:50,283 ♪♪ She was there ♪♪ 74 00:02:50,316 --> 00:02:53,316 ♪♪ That's how she became The nanny ♪♪ 75 00:02:53,350 --> 00:02:56,160 ♪♪ Who would have guessed That the girl we described ♪♪ 76 00:02:56,500 --> 00:02:58,333 ♪♪ Was just exactly What the doctor prescribed? ♪♪ 77 00:02:58,366 --> 00:02:59,466 ♪♪ Now the father Finds her beguiling ♪♪ 78 00:03:00,000 --> 00:03:01,233 ♪♪ Watch out, C.C. ♪♪ 79 00:03:01,266 --> 00:03:03,500 ♪♪ And the kids Are actually smiling ♪♪ 80 00:03:03,830 --> 00:03:04,216 ♪♪ Such joie de vivre ♪♪ 81 00:03:04,250 --> 00:03:06,330 ♪♪ She's the lady in red ♪♪ 82 00:03:06,660 --> 00:03:09,433 ♪♪ When everybody else Is wearing tan ♪♪ 83 00:03:09,466 --> 00:03:11,483 ♪♪ The flashy girl From Flushing ♪♪ 84 00:03:12,160 --> 00:03:13,116 ♪♪ The nanny named Fran ♪♪ 85 00:03:23,216 --> 00:03:25,183 Thank you. 86 00:03:25,216 --> 00:03:28,233 Well, your home is charming. 87 00:03:28,266 --> 00:03:29,333 It amazes me 88 00:03:29,366 --> 00:03:31,233 what you've been able to do, Maxwell. 89 00:03:31,266 --> 00:03:34,100 And all from putting on your little plays. 90 00:03:34,133 --> 00:03:35,416 Oh, they're not so little. 91 00:03:35,450 --> 00:03:37,466 He lost over a million on the last one. 92 00:03:39,283 --> 00:03:41,133 Tell me, Margaret, 93 00:03:41,166 --> 00:03:43,316 do you plan to go on the stage? 94 00:03:43,350 --> 00:03:45,350 Uh, no, I don't think so. 95 00:03:45,383 --> 00:03:47,250 Well, then we don't need to be made up 96 00:03:47,283 --> 00:03:49,283 like a showgirl, do we? 97 00:03:52,000 --> 00:03:54,350 So, Nanny Mueller, how was your passage? 98 00:03:54,383 --> 00:03:56,333 Well, theQE2 is always splendid, 99 00:03:56,366 --> 00:03:59,830 but the food has fallen off a bit. 100 00:03:59,116 --> 00:04:00,350 Go eat on a boat. 101 00:04:00,383 --> 00:04:02,316 I took the kids on the Staten Island ferry. 102 00:04:02,350 --> 00:04:05,183 I swear, half a hot dog, and we're pulling whiskers out of our teeth. 103 00:04:06,133 --> 00:04:07,350 Sausage, anyone? 104 00:04:08,366 --> 00:04:11,183 Miss, um, Fine, is it? Yes. 105 00:04:11,216 --> 00:04:13,400 Which agency exactly was it that arranged 106 00:04:13,433 --> 00:04:15,000 for your position here? 107 00:04:15,330 --> 00:04:16,450 Oh, I didn't come through an agency. 108 00:04:16,483 --> 00:04:18,483 Mr. Sheffield hired me right off the street. 109 00:04:19,466 --> 00:04:21,333 It's not like it sounds. 110 00:04:21,366 --> 00:04:23,450 I tried her out for the weekend first. 111 00:04:27,316 --> 00:04:30,830 So, Nanny Mueller, 112 00:04:30,116 --> 00:04:33,100 how long you planning on staying? A week? 113 00:04:33,133 --> 00:04:34,383 Or so. 114 00:04:34,416 --> 00:04:36,450 It's the "or so" I'm worried about. 115 00:04:38,830 --> 00:04:40,500 Miss Fine, you know, in my day, 116 00:04:40,830 --> 00:04:41,433 the nanny always sat in the kitchen 117 00:04:41,466 --> 00:04:43,433 with the rest of the staff. 118 00:04:43,466 --> 00:04:45,450 Well, those days are over. 119 00:04:45,483 --> 00:04:48,160 You just sit right here with us. 120 00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:53,466 Make yourself at home. 121 00:04:54,000 --> 00:04:58,350 I see you have, at the tableund 122 00:04:58,383 --> 00:05:02,000 Here in America, we're a little less formal. 123 00:05:02,330 --> 00:05:04,100 When in Rome,Fraulein. 124 00:05:05,150 --> 00:05:07,300 Well, I think I had just about enough. 125 00:05:08,350 --> 00:05:10,133 I'll show her to her room. 126 00:05:10,166 --> 00:05:11,450 Guten Abend. Good night. 127 00:05:11,483 --> 00:05:13,150 Good night. Sleep tight. 128 00:05:13,183 --> 00:05:14,400 Nice meeting you. 129 00:05:14,433 --> 00:05:16,316 She hates my guts. 130 00:05:16,350 --> 00:05:19,333 Oh, I wouldn't say that. 131 00:05:19,366 --> 00:05:21,100 No, it's just that you-- 132 00:05:21,133 --> 00:05:23,400 Well, you are somewhat of an acquired taste... 133 00:05:23,433 --> 00:05:26,116 like sushi. 134 00:05:26,150 --> 00:05:27,333 Sushi. 135 00:05:27,366 --> 00:05:29,100 Leave it to the Japanese 136 00:05:29,133 --> 00:05:32,000 to invent a restaurant where you don't have to cook. 137 00:05:32,330 --> 00:05:34,660 And we wonder why we're behind. 138 00:05:35,366 --> 00:05:38,333 You're looking very fit, Nilesy. 139 00:05:39,333 --> 00:05:41,133 Oh, Clara. 140 00:05:41,166 --> 00:05:43,116 Then you do remember me. 141 00:05:43,150 --> 00:05:45,216 How could I forget you... 142 00:05:45,250 --> 00:05:47,330 the butler's son? 143 00:05:48,166 --> 00:05:52,500 A callow youth just beginning in service. 144 00:05:52,830 --> 00:05:54,383 And you, the experienced older woman. 145 00:05:54,416 --> 00:05:57,333 Ha, ha, ha! I was all of 22... 146 00:05:57,366 --> 00:05:59,366 Okay, 32. 147 00:06:01,660 --> 00:06:04,150 And yet I learned so much from you. 148 00:06:04,183 --> 00:06:06,000 Let's review. 149 00:06:15,483 --> 00:06:18,500 A little fluff, a little tease, 150 00:06:18,830 --> 00:06:20,316 and you'll look just like... 151 00:06:20,350 --> 00:06:22,150 my mother. 152 00:06:23,200 --> 00:06:25,466 I was hoping for Michelle Pfeiffer. 153 00:06:26,000 --> 00:06:28,150 Yeah. So was my mother. 154 00:06:28,183 --> 00:06:30,250 Brighton, you lost all your checkers. 155 00:06:30,283 --> 00:06:31,400 You always lose everything. 156 00:06:31,433 --> 00:06:34,283 Not everything. I'm still stuck with you. 157 00:06:34,316 --> 00:06:36,183 Oh, shut up, Brighton. You shut up. 158 00:06:36,216 --> 00:06:39,100 Shut up, Brighton! Will you both shut up? 159 00:06:39,133 --> 00:06:40,266 Here. Use the cookies. 160 00:06:40,300 --> 00:06:42,283 That way, you can eat your winnings. 161 00:06:42,316 --> 00:06:44,100 But all the pieces are black. 162 00:06:45,100 --> 00:06:47,300 All right, here. Now they're not. 163 00:06:49,100 --> 00:06:52,183 Now, what color polish for your nails, Miss Pfeiffer? 164 00:06:52,216 --> 00:06:53,450 [IMITATING NANNY MUELLER] Little girls should not 165 00:06:53,483 --> 00:06:56,416 paint ze face or ze fingers. Ve do not want to-- 166 00:06:56,450 --> 00:06:58,383 Oh, hello, Nanny Mueller! 167 00:06:58,416 --> 00:07:02,266 Well, aren't we the regular Hogan Hero? 168 00:07:04,316 --> 00:07:06,500 He's great with impressions. 169 00:07:06,830 --> 00:07:08,150 He does me too. Do me. Do me. 170 00:07:08,183 --> 00:07:09,383 Oy. 171 00:07:11,316 --> 00:07:14,283 We do not do our hair in the kitchen, 172 00:07:14,316 --> 00:07:17,830 und on the counter. 173 00:07:17,116 --> 00:07:18,450 We are not a teapot. 174 00:07:18,483 --> 00:07:20,116 Sometimes I am. 175 00:07:20,150 --> 00:07:21,183 ♪♪ This is my handle ♪♪ 176 00:07:21,216 --> 00:07:23,350 ♪♪ This is my spout ♪♪♪♪ 177 00:07:24,366 --> 00:07:26,383 It's an American thing. 178 00:07:26,416 --> 00:07:30,366 Brighton, are you eating sweets between meals? 179 00:07:30,400 --> 00:07:32,416 I had to. I jumped her. 180 00:07:34,133 --> 00:07:36,330 Miss Fine, you allow this? 181 00:07:36,660 --> 00:07:37,660 I don't make the rules. 182 00:07:37,100 --> 00:07:38,400 If he jumped her, he jumped her. 183 00:07:39,300 --> 00:07:42,283 Proper children don't play with their food. 184 00:07:42,316 --> 00:07:45,116 Then I'd better go get the Tater Tots out of my toy box. 185 00:07:46,383 --> 00:07:48,383 He reminds me of his father at this age. 186 00:07:49,483 --> 00:07:52,216 We sent him away to boarding school. 187 00:07:52,250 --> 00:07:55,266 Knocked that smart-aleck streak right out of him. 188 00:07:56,366 --> 00:07:58,166 FRAN: Ugh. Boarding school. 189 00:07:58,200 --> 00:07:59,483 Poor Mr. Sheffield. 190 00:08:00,160 --> 00:08:02,133 I couldn't make it through one night of sleepaway camp. 191 00:08:02,166 --> 00:08:04,000 I mean, what kind of a sadist 192 00:08:04,330 --> 00:08:05,300 puts a bunch of kids into a tent 193 00:08:05,333 --> 00:08:07,316 after feeding them franks and beans? 194 00:08:09,160 --> 00:08:11,500 The bears didn't know what hit 'em. 195 00:08:13,150 --> 00:08:16,000 All right. Fine. Goodbye. 196 00:08:16,330 --> 00:08:19,316 My mother will not listen to reason. 197 00:08:19,350 --> 00:08:21,500 She's taking a trip to the Orient, 198 00:08:21,830 --> 00:08:22,366 and every time she travels alone, 199 00:08:22,400 --> 00:08:25,166 she picks up some gigolo who spends all of her money. 200 00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:26,483 I can see why you're concerned. 201 00:08:27,160 --> 00:08:29,383 Darn right. It's my inheritance. 202 00:08:29,416 --> 00:08:31,830 [TELEPHONE RINGS] 203 00:08:31,116 --> 00:08:33,350 Excuse me. Hello? 204 00:08:33,383 --> 00:08:35,116 Yeah. Just a moment. C.C.? 205 00:08:35,150 --> 00:08:36,183 Is it my mother, B.B.? 206 00:08:36,216 --> 00:08:37,233 Sister. 207 00:08:37,266 --> 00:08:39,383 D.D.! 208 00:08:39,416 --> 00:08:42,100 They save a fortune in engraving. 209 00:08:42,133 --> 00:08:44,383 Mm-hm. Uh, Mr. Sheffield, you got a minute? 210 00:08:44,416 --> 00:08:47,316 I really want to talk to you about your Nanny Mueller. 211 00:08:47,350 --> 00:08:49,450 Is there a problem? Well, it's just that 212 00:08:49,483 --> 00:08:51,333 it gets a little confusing for the kids 213 00:08:51,366 --> 00:08:54,300 when I say one thing and she says another. 214 00:08:54,333 --> 00:08:55,416 Such as? 215 00:08:55,450 --> 00:08:58,200 You know, I say "tomayto," she says "tomahto." 216 00:08:58,233 --> 00:09:00,183 I say potato, she says-- 217 00:09:00,216 --> 00:09:01,266 Miss Fine. 218 00:09:01,300 --> 00:09:03,366 Well, since you asked, 219 00:09:03,400 --> 00:09:05,466 Maggie is upset because Nanny Mueller 220 00:09:06,000 --> 00:09:08,216 took away all her makeup, which kind of upsets me, 221 00:09:08,250 --> 00:09:10,160 because most of it was mine. 222 00:09:10,433 --> 00:09:12,233 Well, she is only 14. 223 00:09:12,266 --> 00:09:15,150 And every time Brighton cracks a joke, 224 00:09:15,183 --> 00:09:17,660 she's sending him off to boarding school, 225 00:09:17,100 --> 00:09:18,433 which, if you ask me, at his age, 226 00:09:18,466 --> 00:09:20,350 could screw any kid up for life. 227 00:09:20,383 --> 00:09:23,200 I was sent away to Eton at precisely his age. 228 00:09:23,233 --> 00:09:25,283 Uh-huh. 229 00:09:25,316 --> 00:09:28,383 Miss Fine, considering your limited experience in this field, 230 00:09:28,416 --> 00:09:30,350 maybe you should take advantage of this visit. 231 00:09:31,183 --> 00:09:33,216 Pick up a few tips from an old pro. 232 00:09:33,250 --> 00:09:35,383 Well, who is she, Arnold Palmer? 233 00:09:35,416 --> 00:09:38,660 She happens to be a highly trained, 234 00:09:38,100 --> 00:09:39,400 highly skilled professional nanny, 235 00:09:39,433 --> 00:09:41,483 and has been for the last 40 years. 236 00:09:42,160 --> 00:09:43,266 Well, meanwhile, 237 00:09:43,300 --> 00:09:44,466 she's scaring Gracie to death 238 00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:46,400 with those stories about that fat bear 239 00:09:46,433 --> 00:09:48,116 that can't even get through the doorway 240 00:09:48,150 --> 00:09:49,483 every time he has a decent meal. 241 00:09:50,160 --> 00:09:52,150 Are you talking about Winnie The Pooh? 242 00:09:52,183 --> 00:09:53,366 Yeah. Him. 243 00:09:56,330 --> 00:09:57,383 And who in his right mind 244 00:09:57,416 --> 00:09:59,433 would call a boy "Winnie," let alone "the Pooh"? 245 00:10:01,316 --> 00:10:03,466 Most children love those stories. 246 00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:07,166 Far be it for me to pooh-pooh the Pooh, 247 00:10:07,200 --> 00:10:09,250 but in case you haven't noticed, 248 00:10:09,283 --> 00:10:11,660 Gracie is not most children. 249 00:10:11,100 --> 00:10:12,383 She likes a good thriller. 250 00:10:12,416 --> 00:10:14,383 We're right in the middle ofThe Firm. 251 00:10:16,100 --> 00:10:17,366 What's the matter, Nanny Fine? 252 00:10:17,400 --> 00:10:19,283 Nanny Mueller giving you a run for your money? 253 00:10:19,316 --> 00:10:21,233 You got a piece of parsley 254 00:10:21,266 --> 00:10:23,216 right over there. 255 00:10:23,250 --> 00:10:24,383 For heaven's sake. 256 00:10:24,416 --> 00:10:27,133 I think Nanny Mueller is marvelous. 257 00:10:27,166 --> 00:10:30,100 She reminds me of my nanny. Bobo. 258 00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:33,333 Bobo? 259 00:10:33,366 --> 00:10:36,660 Oy. Were all you bluebloods raised by nannies? 260 00:10:36,100 --> 00:10:37,350 What were your parents doing? 261 00:10:38,316 --> 00:10:41,830 I don't really know. I have no idea. 262 00:10:41,383 --> 00:10:42,416 Knock-knock. 263 00:10:42,450 --> 00:10:44,316 I got a surprise for you. 264 00:10:44,350 --> 00:10:46,100 Children! 265 00:10:53,160 --> 00:10:57,100 Well, if it isn't the "Von Sapp family." 266 00:10:58,316 --> 00:11:01,216 I had a sailor suit just like that. 267 00:11:01,250 --> 00:11:04,160 Parsley's over here now. 268 00:11:04,500 --> 00:11:06,330 Fran, I can't go outside in this. 269 00:11:06,660 --> 00:11:07,366 Somebody'll kick my butt. 270 00:11:07,400 --> 00:11:10,333 Sweetheart, I'd kick your butt. 271 00:11:10,366 --> 00:11:11,433 Excuse me. 272 00:11:19,383 --> 00:11:21,830 I mean, who does she think she is, 273 00:11:21,116 --> 00:11:23,830 criticizing my kids? 274 00:11:23,116 --> 00:11:24,483 They're happy, normal kids. 275 00:11:25,160 --> 00:11:27,366 Gracie, stop staring up at the sun. 276 00:11:27,400 --> 00:11:32,100 Do you know, last night, I found Eduardo in bed with my sister? 277 00:11:32,133 --> 00:11:34,250 Twenty years I've given that man. 278 00:11:34,283 --> 00:11:36,333 [SPEAKING SPANISH] 279 00:11:36,366 --> 00:11:38,266 Lupe, Lupe, Lupe. 280 00:11:38,300 --> 00:11:40,500 We dealt with your problems last week. 281 00:11:40,830 --> 00:11:42,166 Can I get a little support here? 282 00:11:44,000 --> 00:11:46,400 Meanwhile, that Mueller's got those kids dressed 283 00:11:46,433 --> 00:11:48,316 like Huey, Louie, and Dewey. 284 00:11:48,350 --> 00:11:51,250 And she's got the nerve to want me to wear a uniform. 285 00:11:51,283 --> 00:11:53,366 Like I'd be caught dead in one of those. 286 00:11:54,433 --> 00:11:57,100 Oh, well... 287 00:11:57,133 --> 00:11:59,660 On you guys, it looks great. 288 00:11:59,100 --> 00:12:01,416 And I guess those hairy legs are a big hit in Europe too. 289 00:12:04,466 --> 00:12:07,350 Francine, don't forget the cardinal rule... 290 00:12:07,383 --> 00:12:10,830 Never come between a man and his nanny. 291 00:12:10,116 --> 00:12:11,233 You won't win. 292 00:12:11,266 --> 00:12:13,150 You're right. You're right. 293 00:12:13,183 --> 00:12:16,160 I seen it happen a hundred times. 294 00:12:16,500 --> 00:12:17,300 She's after your job. 295 00:12:17,333 --> 00:12:18,400 It happened to me. 296 00:12:19,350 --> 00:12:21,466 She flew in on her broomstick and just tried to take over. 297 00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:23,366 Well, I wouldn't put up with it, 298 00:12:23,400 --> 00:12:26,250 and I went straight to Mr. McKenzie and told him so. 299 00:12:26,283 --> 00:12:29,116 But you don't work for the McKenzies. 300 00:12:29,150 --> 00:12:30,316 Exactly. 301 00:12:42,416 --> 00:12:44,233 Since I retired, 302 00:12:44,266 --> 00:12:47,266 I travel the world visiting my children. 303 00:12:47,300 --> 00:12:49,483 But I saved the best for last. 304 00:12:50,160 --> 00:12:52,483 No, Nanny Mueller, please. 305 00:12:53,160 --> 00:12:55,383 Do go on. 306 00:12:55,416 --> 00:12:58,160 So Maxwell was always your favorite? 307 00:12:58,500 --> 00:13:00,166 He was my chubby little cherub. 308 00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:02,200 He used to run around the garden 309 00:13:02,233 --> 00:13:04,183 without a stitch of clothing on. 310 00:13:04,216 --> 00:13:05,433 Run! Run! Run! 311 00:13:05,466 --> 00:13:07,660 MAXWELL: Nanny Mueller-- 312 00:13:07,100 --> 00:13:08,216 NANNY MUELLER: Oh, you did. 313 00:13:08,250 --> 00:13:10,183 He had the cutest bottom, 314 00:13:10,216 --> 00:13:13,183 like two shiny little cling peaches. 315 00:13:15,433 --> 00:13:19,150 Well, that's more than I've ever wanted to know about Dad. 316 00:13:19,183 --> 00:13:21,166 I am so glad I stayed for dinner. 317 00:13:21,200 --> 00:13:23,166 There's something positively delightful 318 00:13:23,200 --> 00:13:24,266 about this evening. 319 00:13:24,300 --> 00:13:26,266 I can't quite put my finger on it. 320 00:13:26,300 --> 00:13:27,383 Where's Miss Fine? 321 00:13:27,416 --> 00:13:29,150 Oh, that's it. 322 00:13:35,433 --> 00:13:37,166 I'm sorry I'm late... 323 00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:41,000 but it's hell finding white shoes in winter. 324 00:13:41,330 --> 00:13:43,250 The hat was easy. Howard Johnson's. 325 00:13:46,330 --> 00:13:48,330 Children, it's not polite to stare. 326 00:13:48,400 --> 00:13:51,283 Miss Fine, you-- You look like a... 327 00:13:51,316 --> 00:13:52,483 Nanny. 328 00:13:53,160 --> 00:13:54,330 Yes. That's it. 329 00:13:54,660 --> 00:13:56,166 I just didn't put it together. 330 00:13:56,200 --> 00:13:58,383 I don't want to disturb you. I just thought I'd take my dinner, 331 00:13:58,416 --> 00:14:01,233 and eat it in the kitchen, where I belong. 332 00:14:01,266 --> 00:14:03,830 Miss Fine, please, don't be so silly. 333 00:14:03,116 --> 00:14:04,333 Come and join us. No, no. 334 00:14:04,366 --> 00:14:06,483 The kitchen is where a proper nanny eats. 335 00:14:07,160 --> 00:14:08,133 Maggie, shut your mouth. 336 00:14:08,166 --> 00:14:09,366 We are not a Pez dispenser. 337 00:14:13,133 --> 00:14:14,450 Nanny Mueller, 338 00:14:14,483 --> 00:14:18,160 it's amazing what you've done with Miss Fine. 339 00:14:18,500 --> 00:14:19,366 Oh, that's nothing. 340 00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:23,233 I had a schnauzer once that gave me more trouble. 341 00:14:23,266 --> 00:14:25,433 Nanny, are you comparing Miss Fine to a dog? 342 00:14:25,466 --> 00:14:27,183 Not at all. 343 00:14:27,216 --> 00:14:29,333 The schnauzer had a pedigree. 344 00:14:32,283 --> 00:14:35,366 Don't mind me. I just need a little salt. 345 00:14:35,400 --> 00:14:37,116 Just a pinch. 346 00:14:37,150 --> 00:14:38,250 I'll leave the shaker... 347 00:14:38,283 --> 00:14:40,283 on the table, with the family, 348 00:14:40,316 --> 00:14:42,500 in the dining room. 349 00:14:42,830 --> 00:14:44,116 Got a little... Mm. 350 00:14:48,400 --> 00:14:51,500 FRAN: ♪♪ In my own little corner ♪♪ 351 00:14:51,830 --> 00:14:54,000 ♪♪ In my own little chair ♪♪ 352 00:14:54,330 --> 00:14:56,660 ♪♪ I can be-- ♪♪ Miss Fine. 353 00:14:56,100 --> 00:14:58,200 Yes, Mr. Sheffield, sir? 354 00:14:58,233 --> 00:15:00,200 Take off that uniform. 355 00:15:00,233 --> 00:15:02,383 Ooh, Mr. Sheffield. 356 00:15:02,416 --> 00:15:05,330 Why are you wearing this ridiculous get-up 357 00:15:05,660 --> 00:15:06,433 and acting in this ridiculous way? 358 00:15:06,466 --> 00:15:08,433 I'm just trying to be the proper nanny. 359 00:15:08,466 --> 00:15:10,233 If I wanted a proper nanny, 360 00:15:10,266 --> 00:15:12,330 I never would have hired you. 361 00:15:12,660 --> 00:15:14,333 Thanks. You know what I mean. 362 00:15:14,366 --> 00:15:16,383 You're unconventional. 363 00:15:16,416 --> 00:15:19,133 You have no professional training. 364 00:15:19,166 --> 00:15:21,450 And you look ludicrous in that uniform. 365 00:15:21,483 --> 00:15:23,416 When do we get to the good part? 366 00:15:23,450 --> 00:15:27,500 But despite the gaps in your résumé, 367 00:15:27,830 --> 00:15:29,660 the children adore you. 368 00:15:29,100 --> 00:15:31,300 You make them very happy. 369 00:15:31,333 --> 00:15:34,660 You make us all very happy. 370 00:15:34,100 --> 00:15:35,250 I try. 371 00:15:35,283 --> 00:15:38,133 So does that mean my job's not in jeopardy? 372 00:15:38,166 --> 00:15:39,383 No more than usual. 373 00:15:39,416 --> 00:15:43,450 I'm gonna give that Lupe such azetz. 374 00:15:43,483 --> 00:15:45,183 Oh, listen. 375 00:15:45,216 --> 00:15:48,466 Nanny Mueller has turned this household upside-down. 376 00:15:50,100 --> 00:15:51,266 What am I gonna do? 377 00:15:51,300 --> 00:15:54,216 Well, this is just off the top of my head, 378 00:15:54,250 --> 00:15:56,166 but why don't we run this up a flagpole? 379 00:15:56,200 --> 00:15:58,400 Tell her to leave. 380 00:15:58,433 --> 00:16:00,233 I can't just turn her out. 381 00:16:00,266 --> 00:16:03,660 She raised me, for heaven's sakes. 382 00:16:03,100 --> 00:16:05,316 I'd feel so guilty. 383 00:16:05,350 --> 00:16:08,183 Oh, you wouldn't understand. 384 00:16:08,216 --> 00:16:09,416 I wouldn't understand guilt? 385 00:16:09,450 --> 00:16:11,166 My people invented it. 386 00:16:11,200 --> 00:16:12,483 But we made up for it 387 00:16:13,160 --> 00:16:15,216 with the Salk vaccine and Streisand. 388 00:16:15,250 --> 00:16:18,433 Hmm. Well, I suppose you're right. 389 00:16:18,466 --> 00:16:22,500 I should just tell her to go. 390 00:16:22,830 --> 00:16:24,830 Unless... 391 00:16:24,116 --> 00:16:26,316 Do you really think she's that bad? 392 00:16:26,350 --> 00:16:29,350 Did you see The Hand That Rocks The Cradle? 393 00:16:29,383 --> 00:16:31,283 She was the technical advisor. 394 00:16:32,350 --> 00:16:33,400 [MAN LAUGHING] 395 00:16:33,433 --> 00:16:34,433 What's that? 396 00:16:34,466 --> 00:16:36,660 Niles. 397 00:16:36,100 --> 00:16:37,416 [HARSH, HIGH-PITCHED LAUGHTER] 398 00:16:37,450 --> 00:16:39,283 Nanny Mueller. 399 00:16:39,316 --> 00:16:42,216 BOTH: Niles and Nanny Mueller! 400 00:16:42,250 --> 00:16:44,500 Go, go, go! 401 00:16:44,830 --> 00:16:46,830 [LOUDER LAUGHTER] 402 00:16:56,150 --> 00:16:58,433 A little custard pudding, Clara? 403 00:16:58,466 --> 00:17:00,150 Why not? 404 00:17:00,183 --> 00:17:02,283 We've earned it. 405 00:17:02,316 --> 00:17:04,330 Nilesy, oh! 406 00:17:04,660 --> 00:17:05,316 Oh, Clara. 407 00:17:05,350 --> 00:17:07,266 I can't believe it. 408 00:17:07,300 --> 00:17:08,316 Niles. 409 00:17:08,350 --> 00:17:10,160 Now we know what they meant 410 00:17:10,500 --> 00:17:11,250 by "the butler did it." 411 00:17:11,283 --> 00:17:14,160 My Nanny Mueller having-- Having... 412 00:17:14,500 --> 00:17:15,283 Pudding. 413 00:17:15,316 --> 00:17:16,483 And with Niles. 414 00:17:17,160 --> 00:17:19,116 Yeah, well, she's a big girl. 415 00:17:19,150 --> 00:17:20,400 I'm sure she's had plenty of pudding 416 00:17:20,433 --> 00:17:22,160 with plenty of people. 417 00:17:22,500 --> 00:17:23,416 No, please, I cannot think of her like that. 418 00:17:23,450 --> 00:17:26,416 I know. It's like thinking about your parents having sex. 419 00:17:26,450 --> 00:17:28,660 Thank God mine never did. 420 00:17:36,433 --> 00:17:38,216 Niles, coffee. 421 00:17:38,250 --> 00:17:40,660 Oh, thank you, sir. 422 00:17:40,100 --> 00:17:41,416 I could use a cup. 423 00:17:41,450 --> 00:17:44,160 Oh. Sorry. 424 00:17:45,216 --> 00:17:48,183 Oh! Good morning, everyone. 425 00:17:48,216 --> 00:17:50,660 Good morning. Niles. 426 00:17:50,100 --> 00:17:52,330 Nanny Mueller. How did you sleep? 427 00:17:52,660 --> 00:17:54,660 Like a little baby. Und 428 00:17:54,100 --> 00:17:55,133 Quite well. 429 00:17:55,166 --> 00:17:57,266 I think we all slept very well. 430 00:17:57,300 --> 00:17:58,483 Actually, I didn't. 431 00:17:59,160 --> 00:18:01,350 I kept hearing things that go bump in the night. 432 00:18:04,400 --> 00:18:06,283 Thank you, Niles. 433 00:18:06,316 --> 00:18:08,330 I'm famished. 434 00:18:08,660 --> 00:18:10,216 The woman is insatiable. 435 00:18:10,250 --> 00:18:14,830 I see you're back at table und 436 00:18:15,830 --> 00:18:16,333 Maxwell. 437 00:18:16,366 --> 00:18:18,433 You might vant a vord with her. 438 00:18:18,466 --> 00:18:21,350 I think he wants a "vord" with you. 439 00:18:21,383 --> 00:18:23,830 Mr. Sheffield. 440 00:18:23,116 --> 00:18:24,316 Maxwell. 441 00:18:24,350 --> 00:18:26,366 Yes. Well, ahem. 442 00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:28,233 Nanny... 443 00:18:28,266 --> 00:18:32,333 your visit has been wonderful, but like all good things-- 444 00:18:32,366 --> 00:18:35,200 Oh, yes, Maxwell, I've never been so happy. 445 00:18:35,233 --> 00:18:38,333 Since the day that you fell in the duck pond. 446 00:18:38,366 --> 00:18:40,216 I pull you out, 447 00:18:40,250 --> 00:18:43,416 I breathe life back into your little limp body. 448 00:18:43,450 --> 00:18:45,133 Oh... 449 00:18:45,166 --> 00:18:47,166 Now, what do you want to tell me? 450 00:18:47,200 --> 00:18:49,100 Oh. Uh... 451 00:18:49,133 --> 00:18:50,316 Look at the time. 452 00:18:50,350 --> 00:18:53,133 I've got a tennis game. Excuse me. 453 00:18:53,166 --> 00:18:55,233 Oh, Mr. Sheffield. 454 00:18:55,266 --> 00:18:57,183 You forgot your balls. 455 00:19:03,266 --> 00:19:04,333 FRAN: Ahem. 456 00:19:04,366 --> 00:19:05,450 Miss Fine. 457 00:19:05,483 --> 00:19:07,300 That's Nanny Fine. 458 00:19:07,333 --> 00:19:11,830 That is a title that must be earned. 459 00:19:11,116 --> 00:19:14,166 All right, maybe I haven't been a nanny as long as you, 460 00:19:14,200 --> 00:19:17,383 but in case you haven't noticed, Mr. Sheffield is all grown up. 461 00:19:17,416 --> 00:19:20,500 He doesn't need a nanny anymore. 462 00:19:20,830 --> 00:19:23,366 I'm the nanny here now. These are my kids. 463 00:19:23,400 --> 00:19:27,166 And, well, it's time for you to go. 464 00:19:28,416 --> 00:19:30,200 You might think they're your kids, 465 00:19:30,233 --> 00:19:32,133 but they're not. 466 00:19:32,166 --> 00:19:34,133 You'll find out... 467 00:19:34,166 --> 00:19:36,433 if you last as long as I have. 468 00:19:36,466 --> 00:19:41,450 Kids grow up, go on their way, and you go on to another family. 469 00:19:41,483 --> 00:19:43,316 And you love them too, 470 00:19:43,350 --> 00:19:45,333 because you can't help it. 471 00:19:45,366 --> 00:19:47,250 And on and on and-- 472 00:19:47,283 --> 00:19:48,483 Till one day, 473 00:19:49,160 --> 00:19:53,316 you find yourself with a lifetime of love to give, 474 00:19:54,300 --> 00:19:56,660 und 475 00:19:56,100 --> 00:19:59,200 Oh, Nanny Mueller. 476 00:19:59,233 --> 00:20:00,433 MAXWELL: Nanny? 477 00:20:00,466 --> 00:20:02,400 Nanny Mueller. 478 00:20:02,433 --> 00:20:04,100 Maxwell? 479 00:20:04,133 --> 00:20:07,466 Clara, as you can see, I'm all grown up now. 480 00:20:08,000 --> 00:20:09,333 My children have a nanny, 481 00:20:09,366 --> 00:20:11,300 and I think it's time for you to go. 482 00:20:11,333 --> 00:20:14,350 Don't you dare talk to your nanny like that! 483 00:20:14,383 --> 00:20:16,366 What? Apologize. 484 00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:19,366 But-- But-- You heard me. Apologize! Sir. 485 00:20:19,400 --> 00:20:21,233 Uh, I'm... 486 00:20:21,266 --> 00:20:23,660 I'm sorry, nanny. 487 00:20:25,660 --> 00:20:26,483 I forgive you, Maxwell. 488 00:20:27,160 --> 00:20:29,283 Nanny knows you've been under a lot of strain. 489 00:20:30,266 --> 00:20:31,450 Yes. 490 00:20:31,483 --> 00:20:33,433 Yes. A lot of strain. 491 00:20:33,466 --> 00:20:37,333 I-- That's it. I've been under a lot of strain. 492 00:20:37,366 --> 00:20:38,466 Kids. 493 00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:40,483 We nannies have got to stick together. 494 00:20:41,160 --> 00:20:42,300 We're like sisters. 495 00:20:42,333 --> 00:20:44,133 Then... 496 00:20:44,166 --> 00:20:45,366 I can stay? 497 00:20:45,400 --> 00:20:46,433 Oh! 498 00:20:46,466 --> 00:20:49,100 Not on your life. 499 00:20:54,483 --> 00:20:56,383 Goodbye, children. 500 00:20:56,416 --> 00:20:59,160 Oh, take good care of your father. 501 00:20:59,500 --> 00:21:00,183 Okay. 502 00:21:00,216 --> 00:21:01,416 [STRAINING] Okay! 503 00:21:03,660 --> 00:21:04,350 Maxwell. 504 00:21:06,350 --> 00:21:08,333 Goodbye, nanny. 505 00:21:08,366 --> 00:21:10,366 Oh. Oh... 506 00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:14,333 Goodbye, Niles. 507 00:21:14,366 --> 00:21:16,200 It's been a pleasure having you. 508 00:21:17,433 --> 00:21:20,216 Children, see if you can find Miss Fine, will you? 509 00:21:20,250 --> 00:21:23,330 Here I am, here I am. 510 00:21:23,660 --> 00:21:25,316 You think I'd let her go without saying goodbye? 511 00:21:26,483 --> 00:21:29,183 What've you done to your uniform? 512 00:21:29,216 --> 00:21:30,333 You like? 513 00:21:30,366 --> 00:21:32,383 I love!Wunderbar! 514 00:21:32,416 --> 00:21:35,333 You make one for me in my size. Six. 515 00:21:35,366 --> 00:21:37,333 Okay, 12. 516 00:21:37,366 --> 00:21:40,100 All your bags are in the car, Nanny Mueller. 517 00:21:40,133 --> 00:21:42,000 We'll just swing 'round and pick up mother, 518 00:21:42,330 --> 00:21:43,250 and then the two of you will be off. 519 00:21:43,283 --> 00:21:44,450 Oh, I'm so excited. 520 00:21:44,483 --> 00:21:46,450 I always wanted to see Japan. 521 00:21:46,483 --> 00:21:49,333 And I have you to thank for that, Miss-- 522 00:21:49,366 --> 00:21:51,330 Nanny Fine. 523 00:21:51,660 --> 00:21:53,283 Aw. Well, you just have a good time, 524 00:21:53,316 --> 00:21:55,200 and watch out for those gigolos. 525 00:21:55,233 --> 00:21:57,283 Or maybe they should watch out for you. 526 00:21:57,316 --> 00:21:59,660 Oh! 527 00:21:59,100 --> 00:22:02,100 I take good care of my little C.C.'s mummy. 528 00:22:02,133 --> 00:22:04,660 I love you, Nanny Mueller. 529 00:22:04,100 --> 00:22:06,100 Oh, come now. 530 00:22:06,133 --> 00:22:07,333 Come on, sweetheart. 531 00:22:07,366 --> 00:22:09,400 Get up. Get up. Up! 532 00:22:12,166 --> 00:22:13,466 Auf Wiedersehen! 533 00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:15,330 MAXWELL: Bye, Nanny. 534 00:22:15,660 --> 00:22:16,830 Bye. Bye. 535 00:22:16,116 --> 00:22:18,150 Bye, Nanny Mueller. [SIGHS] 536 00:22:18,183 --> 00:22:20,330 Wonderful idea of yours, 537 00:22:20,660 --> 00:22:23,000 putting Nanny Mueller together with C.C.'s mother. 538 00:22:23,330 --> 00:22:25,000 Look, I want Nanny Mueller to have a life, 539 00:22:25,330 --> 00:22:26,233 just not mine. 540 00:22:26,266 --> 00:22:27,466 Let me just get out of this uniform. 541 00:22:28,000 --> 00:22:29,266 Oh, no rush. 542 00:22:29,300 --> 00:22:31,416 Oh, Mr. Sheffield... 543 00:22:33,466 --> 00:22:36,366 [MUSIC PLAYING] 544 00:22:45,233 --> 00:22:47,160 [♪♪♪]