1 00:00:06,100 --> 00:00:07,216 Oh, Niles. Hm? 2 00:00:07,250 --> 00:00:09,000 Look at the cake that I got 3 00:00:09,330 --> 00:00:10,383 for my friend Mona's retirement party. 4 00:00:10,416 --> 00:00:12,150 Oh, it's beautiful. It's plaster of Paris. 5 00:00:12,183 --> 00:00:13,330 [TAPS] 6 00:00:15,830 --> 00:00:18,000 Why would anyone buy a fake cake? 7 00:00:18,330 --> 00:00:19,483 Well, because, you know, I'm gonna take it out of the box, 8 00:00:20,160 --> 00:00:21,483 they're all gonna "ooh" and "ah" and then say, 9 00:00:22,160 --> 00:00:23,316 "Not for me. I'm on a diet." 10 00:00:23,350 --> 00:00:25,266 This way, I can use it again. 11 00:00:25,300 --> 00:00:26,283 Plus I can carry it on the bus like this. 12 00:00:29,330 --> 00:00:31,330 Is Mona excited about her retirement? 13 00:00:31,660 --> 00:00:33,160 Oh, I'm sure she's thrilled, 14 00:00:33,500 --> 00:00:34,283 after all those years killing herself 15 00:00:34,316 --> 00:00:36,133 working as a nanny. 16 00:00:36,166 --> 00:00:37,416 Believe me, there's a lot of pressure 17 00:00:37,450 --> 00:00:39,150 being responsible for the lives 18 00:00:39,183 --> 00:00:40,216 of other people's children. 19 00:00:40,250 --> 00:00:41,433 Fran, where's Brighton? 20 00:00:41,466 --> 00:00:44,500 I dunno. 21 00:00:44,830 --> 00:00:46,383 Oh, you do know there's a piece broken off the side? 22 00:00:46,416 --> 00:00:48,433 Oh, I know. I had it at my mother's not 10 minutes. 23 00:00:48,466 --> 00:00:50,333 She said it's dry, 24 00:00:50,366 --> 00:00:51,366 but if you dunk it in Sanka, it's delish. 25 00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:55,500 [NASAL VOICE] Niles, I seem to be fresh 26 00:00:55,830 --> 00:00:56,450 out of clean handkerchiefs again. 27 00:00:56,483 --> 00:00:58,160 [SNEEZES] NILES: Oh! 28 00:00:58,500 --> 00:00:59,316 You know, Mr. Sheffield, 29 00:00:59,350 --> 00:01:02,283 my mother has a cold remedy that never fails. 30 00:01:02,316 --> 00:01:04,830 Niles, next time you cut up a chicken, save the feet. 31 00:01:05,483 --> 00:01:07,350 Actually... [SNIFFLES] 32 00:01:07,383 --> 00:01:08,216 ...I'm beginning to feel a lot better. 33 00:01:10,183 --> 00:01:12,660 See, never fails. [CHUCKLES] 34 00:01:12,100 --> 00:01:15,250 [THEME MUSIC PLAYS] 35 00:01:15,283 --> 00:01:16,366 ♪ She was workin' In a bridal shop 36 00:01:16,400 --> 00:01:18,116 ♪ In Flushing, Queens ♪ 37 00:01:18,150 --> 00:01:19,250 ♪ Till her boyfriend Kicked her out ♪ 38 00:01:19,283 --> 00:01:21,116 ♪ In one of those Crushing scenes ♪ 39 00:01:21,150 --> 00:01:22,450 ♪ What was she to do? Where was she to go? ♪ 40 00:01:22,483 --> 00:01:26,183 ♪ She was out on her fanny ♪ 41 00:01:26,216 --> 00:01:27,316 ♪ So over the bridge From Flushing ♪ 42 00:01:27,350 --> 00:01:29,183 ♪ To the Sheffields' door ♪ 43 00:01:29,216 --> 00:01:31,350 ♪ She was there to sell makeup But the father saw more ♪ 44 00:01:31,383 --> 00:01:33,300 ♪ She had style, she had flair She was there ♪ 45 00:01:33,333 --> 00:01:37,333 ♪ That's how she became The nanny ♪ 46 00:01:37,366 --> 00:01:40,250 ♪ Who would have guessed That the girl we described ♪ 47 00:01:40,283 --> 00:01:42,316 ♪ Was just exactly what The doctor prescribed? ♪ 48 00:01:42,350 --> 00:01:43,333 ♪ Now the father Finds her beguiling ♪ 49 00:01:43,366 --> 00:01:45,116 ♪ Watch out, C.C. ♪ 50 00:01:45,150 --> 00:01:46,216 ♪ And the kids Are actually smiling ♪ 51 00:01:46,250 --> 00:01:47,366 ♪ Such joie de vivre ♪ 52 00:01:47,400 --> 00:01:49,100 ♪ She's the lady in red ♪ 53 00:01:49,133 --> 00:01:51,400 ♪ When everybody else Is wearing tan ♪ 54 00:01:53,433 --> 00:01:55,233 ♪ The flashy girl From Flushing ♪ 55 00:01:55,266 --> 00:01:56,133 ♪ The nanny named Fran ♪ 56 00:02:06,183 --> 00:02:07,400 Huh? BOTH: Ooh. 57 00:02:07,433 --> 00:02:09,383 BOTH: Aah. 58 00:02:09,416 --> 00:02:11,000 None for me. I can't. I'm on a diet. 59 00:02:13,660 --> 00:02:17,216 Oh. You girls have such great willpower. 60 00:02:17,250 --> 00:02:20,116 Well, if you're not gonna eat it, neither will I. 61 00:02:20,150 --> 00:02:20,450 [BANGS] 62 00:02:24,183 --> 00:02:25,483 So, Annie, tell me, 63 00:02:26,160 --> 00:02:27,466 what did you get Mona for her retirement present? 64 00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:29,233 Well, you know how much she loves Vicki Carr. 65 00:02:29,266 --> 00:02:30,450 Yeah? 66 00:02:30,483 --> 00:02:33,316 I got her the new CD. 67 00:02:33,350 --> 00:02:35,450 Oh, you know, someone already gave her that. 68 00:02:35,483 --> 00:02:37,183 Oh. You better take it back. 69 00:02:37,216 --> 00:02:38,000 Thanks, Fran. 70 00:02:44,160 --> 00:02:45,216 Here she comes. Here she comes. 71 00:02:45,250 --> 00:02:46,450 [ALL SQUEALING] 72 00:02:51,350 --> 00:02:54,116 [IN UNISON] Happy retirement! 73 00:02:54,150 --> 00:02:56,160 Oh! ALL: Congratulations! 74 00:02:56,500 --> 00:03:00,150 Oh, shut up. 75 00:03:00,150 --> 00:03:01,133 You give somebody's kid the best years of your life, 76 00:03:01,166 --> 00:03:03,100 and what do you get? 77 00:03:03,133 --> 00:03:05,233 A pat on the back and a couple of stinking Vicki Carr CDs. 78 00:03:10,660 --> 00:03:11,466 [CLEARS THROAT] 79 00:03:11,466 --> 00:03:13,183 [SNIFFING] 80 00:03:13,216 --> 00:03:15,300 Mona, did you switch perfumes? 81 00:03:15,333 --> 00:03:18,150 I think this is a little too woodsy. 82 00:03:18,183 --> 00:03:20,116 That's not perfume. 83 00:03:20,150 --> 00:03:22,330 The boss is turning my room into a cedar closet. 84 00:03:23,316 --> 00:03:25,200 Cheer up, Mona. 85 00:03:25,233 --> 00:03:26,366 Think about the big party 86 00:03:26,400 --> 00:03:28,000 your boss is making for you 87 00:03:28,330 --> 00:03:30,330 at the Waldorf on Saturday night. 88 00:03:30,660 --> 00:03:31,500 Oh, that reminds me. Who's taping Dr. Quinn? 89 00:03:34,200 --> 00:03:35,450 Meanwhile, when the party's over, 90 00:03:35,483 --> 00:03:36,333 he goes home to Fifth Avenue. 91 00:03:38,183 --> 00:03:39,300 And I move into a dump in Queens 92 00:03:39,333 --> 00:03:42,433 and say goodbye to little Skippy forever. 93 00:03:42,466 --> 00:03:45,400 Oh, now, Mona. 94 00:03:45,433 --> 00:03:49,350 Little Skippy's doing his residency at New York Hospital. 95 00:03:49,383 --> 00:03:52,166 I think that you've milked this nanny routine long enough. 96 00:03:52,200 --> 00:03:55,133 When I started this job, I was 29, gorgeous, 97 00:03:55,166 --> 00:03:56,416 a figure like you. 98 00:03:56,450 --> 00:03:58,366 Look what happens after 20 years 99 00:03:58,400 --> 00:03:59,483 of eating all that rich food his butler makes. 100 00:04:08,160 --> 00:04:09,216 Don't you worry. 101 00:04:09,250 --> 00:04:11,133 Me and you are nothing alike. 102 00:04:11,166 --> 00:04:13,483 I mean, youchose to be a nanny. 103 00:04:14,160 --> 00:04:15,300 I just fell into it... 104 00:04:15,333 --> 00:04:17,250 when my fiancé dumped me. 105 00:04:19,333 --> 00:04:21,166 Fran, that's exactly what happened-- 106 00:04:21,200 --> 00:04:24,830 Thank you, Lupe. 107 00:04:24,116 --> 00:04:28,100 Mona is right. We're nothing alike. 108 00:04:28,133 --> 00:04:29,366 [IN UNISON] Hey, moron, scoop that poop! 109 00:04:33,116 --> 00:04:35,150 Well, wait a minute here. 110 00:04:35,183 --> 00:04:38,000 We're not alike, because I've got a skill 111 00:04:38,330 --> 00:04:39,483 that I can fall back on. 112 00:04:40,160 --> 00:04:41,450 That's what I thought. 113 00:04:41,483 --> 00:04:43,266 See, I was working in a bridal shop 114 00:04:43,300 --> 00:04:46,500 in Flushing, Queens... 115 00:04:46,830 --> 00:04:47,266 until my boyfriend kicked me out 116 00:04:47,300 --> 00:04:49,830 in one of those crushing scenes-- 117 00:04:49,116 --> 00:04:50,116 Stop it, Mona! 118 00:04:52,150 --> 00:04:53,250 Oh, I'm so depressed. 119 00:04:54,383 --> 00:04:56,000 Give me that cake. 120 00:04:56,330 --> 00:04:58,233 Oh, um... Uh... 121 00:04:58,266 --> 00:04:59,400 Whoopsie. 122 00:05:01,660 --> 00:05:02,266 I dropped it. 123 00:05:02,300 --> 00:05:04,100 It's still good. 124 00:05:04,133 --> 00:05:05,250 No, it's not. No, it's not. 125 00:05:05,283 --> 00:05:06,300 It's got dirt all over it. 126 00:05:09,150 --> 00:05:10,433 Plaster of Paris. Mm. 127 00:05:10,466 --> 00:05:13,216 I used to do that. 128 00:05:13,250 --> 00:05:15,133 It's a hell of a lot easier to carry on the bus, huh, Fran? 129 00:05:15,166 --> 00:05:17,316 No! 130 00:05:24,250 --> 00:05:27,266 Come on, Niles. 131 00:05:27,300 --> 00:05:28,433 Tell me what Maxwell's getting me for my birthday. 132 00:05:28,466 --> 00:05:31,433 I'll give you 50 bucks. No. 133 00:05:31,466 --> 00:05:33,133 But if you tell me your age, I'll tell you. 134 00:05:33,166 --> 00:05:35,250 All right, 75. 135 00:05:35,283 --> 00:05:37,200 There, that wasn't so hard to admit, now, was it? 136 00:05:40,216 --> 00:05:41,416 [SIGHS] C.C.: Nanny Fine! 137 00:05:41,450 --> 00:05:44,000 How sweet. 138 00:05:44,330 --> 00:05:45,416 That's for my birthday, isn't it? 139 00:05:45,450 --> 00:05:47,333 Uh, yeah. 140 00:05:47,366 --> 00:05:50,500 "Congratulations... Mona"? 141 00:05:51,300 --> 00:05:52,233 Mona's your Hebrew name. 142 00:05:56,300 --> 00:05:58,216 So how was the park? Was Mona surprised? 143 00:05:58,250 --> 00:06:00,116 No, but I was. 144 00:06:00,150 --> 00:06:03,483 You know, Niles, being a nanny is a thankless job. 145 00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:06,133 I mean, I'm history the minute Gracie starts shaving her pits. 146 00:06:07,366 --> 00:06:10,300 Feeling a tad insecure about our future? 147 00:06:10,333 --> 00:06:13,300 Actually, I'm not the least bit concerned about yours. 148 00:06:13,333 --> 00:06:15,233 I mean, as long as you can put a tea bag in a cup of water, 149 00:06:15,266 --> 00:06:16,183 you got a career. 150 00:06:19,450 --> 00:06:21,100 Meanwhile, I'm out of here as soon as the last kid graduates. 151 00:06:24,266 --> 00:06:25,250 Fran, have you seen my math book? 152 00:06:25,283 --> 00:06:27,000 I have to study. 153 00:06:27,330 --> 00:06:29,660 No, honey. But who cares, really? 154 00:06:31,100 --> 00:06:32,383 So what if you got left back? 155 00:06:32,416 --> 00:06:34,166 What's your rush? 156 00:06:36,366 --> 00:06:38,483 Look, second grade could be the best four years 157 00:06:39,160 --> 00:06:40,400 of your life. 158 00:06:41,250 --> 00:06:42,450 Go. Watch cartoons. 159 00:06:42,483 --> 00:06:44,400 Oh, wait. 160 00:06:44,433 --> 00:06:45,266 All right, go ahead. 161 00:06:56,830 --> 00:06:57,330 Hubba, hubba. 162 00:06:59,183 --> 00:07:00,466 Are you sure you want to waste that 163 00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:03,183 on a nanny retirement party? 164 00:07:03,216 --> 00:07:06,350 Oh, Niles, Mona is one of my closest friends. 165 00:07:06,383 --> 00:07:08,266 I want to look nice for her. 166 00:07:08,300 --> 00:07:10,283 Cardiologist convention in the next ballroom? 167 00:07:10,316 --> 00:07:11,200 Yeah. Mm-hm. 168 00:07:14,150 --> 00:07:15,466 Niles, do you have my cold medicine? 169 00:07:16,000 --> 00:07:16,250 Yes, here you are, sir. 170 00:07:18,383 --> 00:07:20,333 All right. You don't have to watch me. 171 00:07:20,366 --> 00:07:22,116 I'll take it. I'm an adult. 172 00:07:24,216 --> 00:07:25,400 [GROANS] - Yes, I mixed in the honey. 173 00:07:25,433 --> 00:07:26,266 Oh. 174 00:07:28,660 --> 00:07:30,233 All right, then. Carry on. 175 00:07:30,233 --> 00:07:32,250 Oh, Miss Fine! 176 00:07:32,283 --> 00:07:34,266 I-I thought the PTA meeting was next week. 177 00:07:34,300 --> 00:07:35,183 [CHUCKLES] 178 00:07:37,830 --> 00:07:39,660 Don't be ridiculous. 179 00:07:39,100 --> 00:07:40,660 I can't sit in this. 180 00:07:41,350 --> 00:07:43,500 Well, have a wonderful time 181 00:07:43,830 --> 00:07:44,133 at the party tonight, Miss Fine. 182 00:07:44,166 --> 00:07:45,266 Thank you. As a matter of fact, 183 00:07:45,300 --> 00:07:48,250 why don't you take tomorrow off, hm? 184 00:07:48,283 --> 00:07:50,216 You deserve it. You've been doing a wonderful job. 185 00:07:50,250 --> 00:07:52,483 Oh, thanks, Mr. Sheffield. 186 00:07:53,160 --> 00:07:54,133 Gee, whatever you're taking, keep takin' it. 187 00:07:55,366 --> 00:07:56,483 [DOORBELL DINGS] Oh. 188 00:08:00,416 --> 00:08:03,166 Mona, wow! 189 00:08:04,466 --> 00:08:06,450 You like? 190 00:08:06,483 --> 00:08:08,160 Labels for Less. 191 00:08:10,316 --> 00:08:11,433 I think it's Yves St. Bernard. [CHUCKLES] 192 00:08:15,116 --> 00:08:17,166 So guess what. 193 00:08:17,200 --> 00:08:19,100 I don't have to go back to Queens. 194 00:08:19,133 --> 00:08:22,660 Your boss said he can't let you go, because he realized 195 00:08:22,100 --> 00:08:23,466 that the reason why he never remarried 196 00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:26,500 was because he was in love with you all these years? 197 00:08:26,830 --> 00:08:27,330 No. 198 00:08:28,400 --> 00:08:30,200 I'm moving to Florida. 199 00:08:30,233 --> 00:08:32,250 Oh. 200 00:08:32,283 --> 00:08:33,150 I'm gonna live with my mother. 201 00:08:33,183 --> 00:08:34,300 Oh. 202 00:08:38,200 --> 00:08:41,100 I don't mind sharing a sofa bed with my grandma. 203 00:08:41,133 --> 00:08:43,400 She's 100 this year. You believe it? 204 00:08:43,433 --> 00:08:45,400 Your mother and 205 00:08:45,433 --> 00:08:48,466 Better. Yeah. 206 00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:51,330 Grandma doesn't take up much space. 207 00:08:51,660 --> 00:08:52,183 And she can't roll over. 208 00:08:52,216 --> 00:08:54,366 So I just have to get used to sleeping 209 00:08:54,400 --> 00:08:55,433 on a plastic liner. 210 00:09:02,500 --> 00:09:03,416 Well, you know, 211 00:09:03,450 --> 00:09:06,330 it's so much easier doing laundry 212 00:09:06,660 --> 00:09:08,466 when you can use a bottle of 409 and a sponge. 213 00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:10,266 [CHUCKLING] 214 00:09:10,300 --> 00:09:12,216 Let's go, gorgeous. 215 00:09:12,250 --> 00:09:14,350 The boss gave me the limo, and the bar is stocked. 216 00:09:14,383 --> 00:09:16,466 Oh, Mona, you know I can't drink. 217 00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:19,133 One sip of Manischewitz at Passover, 218 00:09:19,166 --> 00:09:20,300 and I'm humming theJeopardy 219 00:09:20,333 --> 00:09:22,160 during the Four Questions. 220 00:09:22,500 --> 00:09:23,100 [BOTH LAUGHING] 221 00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:27,000 Oh, I never used to drink either, honey. 222 00:09:27,330 --> 00:09:29,500 But wait till the first time the boss tells you, 223 00:09:29,830 --> 00:09:31,830 "Take the day off. You're doing a great job." 224 00:09:31,116 --> 00:09:32,216 Why? 225 00:09:34,233 --> 00:09:36,183 It's the beginning of the end, honey. 226 00:09:36,216 --> 00:09:37,333 It means they don't need you anymore. 227 00:09:40,416 --> 00:09:42,150 Well, maybe just one Pink Squirrel. 228 00:09:51,100 --> 00:09:54,830 Gee, I don't know what they put in a Pink Squirrel, 229 00:09:54,116 --> 00:09:55,000 but... 230 00:09:56,250 --> 00:09:59,250 I don't know how squirrels hold on to their nuts. 231 00:10:03,366 --> 00:10:06,330 FRAN: Okay. Doin' good. 232 00:10:06,660 --> 00:10:08,133 Doin' good, doin' good. 233 00:10:08,166 --> 00:10:09,200 Doin' bad, doin' bad, doin' bad. 234 00:10:15,250 --> 00:10:16,466 Oh, I knew I had a door. 235 00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:17,433 Doing good again. 236 00:10:20,483 --> 00:10:23,133 ♪She works hard for the money 237 00:10:25,183 --> 00:10:27,333 [SLURRED] ♪So hard for the money 238 00:10:30,830 --> 00:10:33,133 ♪She works hard for the money 239 00:10:33,166 --> 00:10:36,383 ♪But you never Treat her right 240 00:10:38,160 --> 00:10:40,350 ♪She works hard For the mon-- 241 00:10:40,383 --> 00:10:42,000 ♪The mone-- 242 00:10:42,330 --> 00:10:43,830 [GRUNTING] 243 00:10:45,330 --> 00:10:46,316 Oh. 244 00:10:46,350 --> 00:10:50,250 ♪So hard for the mon-- 245 00:10:50,283 --> 00:10:52,483 ♪She works hard For the money 246 00:10:53,160 --> 00:10:56,500 ♪But you never Treat her right 247 00:11:01,350 --> 00:11:03,400 Oh, my God. 248 00:11:03,433 --> 00:11:05,350 I better color my hair. 249 00:11:10,200 --> 00:11:11,116 ♪ She works hard for the mon-- ♪ 250 00:11:20,250 --> 00:11:23,183 Boy, I better get rid of some of those pant suits. 251 00:11:25,350 --> 00:11:27,200 Damn Annie Hall. 252 00:11:31,483 --> 00:11:33,160 [SIGHS] 253 00:11:34,133 --> 00:11:35,450 [GASPS] 254 00:11:35,483 --> 00:11:37,166 Oh, I'll take my makeup off in the morning. 255 00:11:45,466 --> 00:11:55,000 [EDVARD GRIEG'S "MORNING MOOD" PLAYS] 256 00:12:16,483 --> 00:12:18,400 ♪ La-ta, Ta-ta-ta ♪ 257 00:12:18,433 --> 00:12:21,133 ♪ Ra-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta ♪ 258 00:12:21,166 --> 00:12:22,250 ♪ Tee-ta-ta Ta-tee ♪ 259 00:12:22,283 --> 00:12:24,500 ♪ Ah, ran-ta-ta-- ♪ 260 00:12:24,830 --> 00:12:25,116 Oh, what are you doing here? 261 00:12:25,150 --> 00:12:26,183 The sun is up. 262 00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:32,216 Oh, Niles, just give it a rest. 263 00:12:32,250 --> 00:12:33,350 Today is my birthday. 264 00:12:33,383 --> 00:12:35,660 You're not gonna get my goat. 265 00:12:35,100 --> 00:12:37,000 Why? Did you two get engaged? 266 00:12:39,200 --> 00:12:42,250 Niles, just shut up. [SCOFFS] 267 00:12:42,283 --> 00:12:44,160 How's Maxwell? Is he feeling any better? 268 00:12:44,500 --> 00:12:46,500 Well, I think so, yes. 269 00:12:46,830 --> 00:12:47,316 He took a wonderful Jewish remedy last night. 270 00:12:52,330 --> 00:12:53,316 I wish there was something I could do for him. 271 00:12:53,350 --> 00:12:55,500 I'd love to stay and chat, Miss Babcock, 272 00:12:55,830 --> 00:12:56,300 but Mr. Sheffield is waiting. 273 00:12:56,333 --> 00:12:59,000 And you know how much better he feels, 274 00:12:59,330 --> 00:13:00,383 and how happy he is, 275 00:13:00,416 --> 00:13:03,383 when someone brings him his tray. 276 00:13:03,416 --> 00:13:05,316 Ooh, let me do it! Let me do it! 277 00:13:05,350 --> 00:13:07,350 Oh, no, no, no, Miss Babcock, I couldn't. 278 00:13:07,383 --> 00:13:09,300 Give me the stupid tray. Oh, no, no, no, no. 279 00:13:09,333 --> 00:13:11,233 Now, you really shouldn't be in his room. 280 00:13:11,266 --> 00:13:13,350 Why? 281 00:13:13,383 --> 00:13:17,830 Oh, my birthday present's up there, isn't it? 282 00:13:17,116 --> 00:13:19,116 I'm right, aren't I? 283 00:13:19,150 --> 00:13:21,366 Oh, you know me like a book. 284 00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:23,233 [GIGGLES] 285 00:13:29,283 --> 00:13:32,450 [SOFTLY] Oh, Maxwell... 286 00:13:34,133 --> 00:13:36,133 Maxwell. 287 00:13:36,166 --> 00:13:38,330 [SCREAMS] 288 00:13:38,660 --> 00:13:41,500 Oh. Good God! God! C.C. 289 00:13:41,830 --> 00:13:42,433 C.C., what the devil are you doing in here? 290 00:13:42,466 --> 00:13:44,233 [GASPING] What am I doing here? 291 00:13:44,266 --> 00:13:46,183 What is sh-sh-she doing here?! 292 00:13:46,216 --> 00:13:47,450 Who? Oh! 293 00:13:53,250 --> 00:13:55,183 [YELPS] Miss Fine! 294 00:13:55,216 --> 00:13:56,116 I... 295 00:14:00,366 --> 00:14:04,183 Oh, I'm having that dream again. 296 00:14:07,200 --> 00:14:09,150 [YELPS] Mr. Sheffield! 297 00:14:09,183 --> 00:14:10,366 What are you doing in-- your room? 298 00:14:12,216 --> 00:14:15,500 ♪ Happy birthday To you ♪ 299 00:14:15,830 --> 00:14:17,183 ♪ Happy birthday To you ♪ 300 00:14:17,216 --> 00:14:21,000 Would you all kindly get out of my room! 301 00:14:21,330 --> 00:14:24,660 ♪ Happy birthday Miss Babcock ♪ 302 00:14:26,200 --> 00:14:28,830 Miss Fine, there has to be 303 00:14:28,116 --> 00:14:30,116 a perfectly rational explanation to all this. 304 00:14:30,150 --> 00:14:32,283 But with you, that's so rarely the case! 305 00:14:32,316 --> 00:14:34,000 What? 306 00:14:34,330 --> 00:14:35,400 Oh, nothing. 307 00:14:35,433 --> 00:14:37,250 It's just that you could use a Tic Tac or something. 308 00:14:41,150 --> 00:14:43,100 How the devil did you get in here in the first place? 309 00:14:43,133 --> 00:14:44,366 Oh, I don't know. 310 00:14:44,400 --> 00:14:46,266 I must have gotten a little... 311 00:14:46,300 --> 00:14:49,000 schnockered at the nanny party. 312 00:14:49,330 --> 00:14:52,116 What's your excuse?! 313 00:14:52,150 --> 00:14:54,133 Well, I did take a lot of cold medicine last night-- 314 00:14:54,166 --> 00:14:56,466 I-I don't need an excuse! It's my bloody room. 315 00:14:57,000 --> 00:14:59,160 Schnockered? 316 00:14:59,500 --> 00:15:00,160 I thought you didn't drink. 317 00:15:00,500 --> 00:15:01,233 Look, I'm a grown woman. 318 00:15:01,266 --> 00:15:03,300 I can have a lousy pink drink if I want one. 319 00:15:03,333 --> 00:15:05,366 I'm going through a personal crisis. 320 00:15:05,400 --> 00:15:09,450 Meanwhile, these sheets are gorgeous. 321 00:15:09,483 --> 00:15:11,233 Do you know if Niles has to iron them? 322 00:15:11,266 --> 00:15:13,000 Miss Fine, focus. 323 00:15:13,330 --> 00:15:14,366 Don't tell me to focus. 324 00:15:14,400 --> 00:15:17,266 You're gonna turn my room into a cedar closet, 325 00:15:17,300 --> 00:15:20,166 while I rot in Florida curled up next to Grandma Yetta 326 00:15:20,200 --> 00:15:21,416 on sheets designed by Rubbermaid. 327 00:15:24,100 --> 00:15:26,266 You should come with a bloody owner's manual, you know that? 328 00:15:26,300 --> 00:15:28,200 I've given you the best years of my life, 329 00:15:28,233 --> 00:15:30,660 and this is what you do to me? 330 00:15:30,100 --> 00:15:31,416 I haven't done anything to you! 331 00:15:31,450 --> 00:15:32,450 Did I? 332 00:15:34,300 --> 00:15:36,116 Oh, God, did we? 333 00:15:36,150 --> 00:15:38,500 Well, w-w-what am I talking about? 334 00:15:38,830 --> 00:15:39,366 If we did, I mean, I think I would remember. 335 00:15:39,400 --> 00:15:42,500 You bet you would. 336 00:15:42,830 --> 00:15:44,166 Miss Fine! 337 00:15:44,200 --> 00:15:46,200 Now, don't panic. 338 00:15:46,233 --> 00:15:48,200 I know nothing happened. 339 00:15:48,233 --> 00:15:51,233 I can guarantee it, because my ears don't itch. 340 00:15:51,266 --> 00:15:53,366 There. Okay? All right. 341 00:15:53,400 --> 00:15:55,350 Just because I'm desperate, I'm gonna ask you. 342 00:15:55,383 --> 00:15:57,433 What do your ears have to do with anything? 343 00:15:57,466 --> 00:15:59,450 Well, I can't really explain it. 344 00:15:59,483 --> 00:16:02,000 All I know is that the next day, 345 00:16:02,330 --> 00:16:04,150 my ears always itch. 346 00:16:04,183 --> 00:16:05,466 [SCOFFS] 347 00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:08,133 Oh, what, like you don't have a thing? 348 00:16:08,166 --> 00:16:10,183 Well. All right, I sing. 349 00:16:12,500 --> 00:16:13,216 Any particular song, or do you just scat? 350 00:16:17,330 --> 00:16:17,366 Georgy Girl. 351 00:16:20,450 --> 00:16:22,300 Hey! Gee, I've been working here for two years, 352 00:16:22,333 --> 00:16:23,250 I never once heard you sing-- 353 00:16:26,183 --> 00:16:27,160 Great scones. 354 00:16:35,366 --> 00:16:38,316 Oh, God, Niles, it was so embarrassing 355 00:16:38,350 --> 00:16:41,350 having Miss Babcock come into my room when she did. 356 00:16:41,383 --> 00:16:43,400 Oh, yes, I know. If only I'd been there to stop her. 357 00:16:45,466 --> 00:16:47,150 I could just kick myself. 358 00:16:49,183 --> 00:16:50,400 It's not your fault, old man. 359 00:16:50,433 --> 00:16:52,166 You know, the worst part of it is, 360 00:16:52,200 --> 00:16:54,233 it was her birthday, and no one remembered. 361 00:16:54,266 --> 00:16:56,200 Oh, I did, sir. Oh, really? 362 00:16:56,233 --> 00:16:57,383 How nice. Did you get her something? 363 00:16:57,416 --> 00:16:58,366 Gave it to her this morning. 364 00:17:02,383 --> 00:17:04,250 You know, Niles, I'd forgotten what it was like 365 00:17:04,283 --> 00:17:05,316 to wake up in the morning with your bed 366 00:17:05,350 --> 00:17:07,160 smelling of perfume. 367 00:17:07,500 --> 00:17:08,166 Oh, I hear you, sir. 368 00:17:10,300 --> 00:17:12,366 I just wonder what's troubling Miss Fine. 369 00:17:12,400 --> 00:17:14,350 Oh, what am I wondering for? 370 00:17:14,383 --> 00:17:15,333 I'm standing here with Liz Smith. 371 00:17:17,150 --> 00:17:18,450 I resent that, sir. 372 00:17:21,350 --> 00:17:22,416 But according to my sources... 373 00:17:24,483 --> 00:17:27,100 Miss Fine is feeling a little insecure about the future. 374 00:17:27,133 --> 00:17:29,316 Oh. Aren't we all? 375 00:17:29,350 --> 00:17:30,366 Perhaps she should use a little less 376 00:17:30,400 --> 00:17:32,450 of that bloody aerosol hair spray. 377 00:17:32,483 --> 00:17:36,100 Oh, no, no. Not the future of the world, sir. 378 00:17:36,133 --> 00:17:37,350 She's concerned about... 379 00:17:37,383 --> 00:17:39,216 the golden years. 380 00:17:39,250 --> 00:17:42,200 Oh, no. Have they canceled her favorite TV show? 381 00:17:42,233 --> 00:17:44,416 Oh, please, sir. Work with me. 382 00:17:47,383 --> 00:17:50,166 What's to become of Miss Fine when her services here 383 00:17:50,200 --> 00:17:52,283 are no longer required? 384 00:17:52,316 --> 00:17:54,830 Oh, you're talking about 385 00:17:54,116 --> 00:17:56,150 after the children are grown, aren't you, Niles? 386 00:17:56,183 --> 00:17:58,660 Always one step ahead of me, sir. 387 00:18:07,316 --> 00:18:09,466 Fran, what are you doing? 388 00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:12,100 Well, you know, I can't be a nanny forever. 389 00:18:12,133 --> 00:18:14,300 I have to have something to fall back on. 390 00:18:14,333 --> 00:18:16,433 And it says here, if you can draw Blinky, 391 00:18:16,466 --> 00:18:19,330 you too can have a lucrative career in animation. 392 00:18:21,450 --> 00:18:24,350 This doesn't look anything like Blinky. 393 00:18:24,383 --> 00:18:26,100 Hey, maybe you could try driving the big rigs 394 00:18:26,133 --> 00:18:27,500 on the other side the matchbox. 395 00:18:28,500 --> 00:18:30,266 Oh, shut up. 396 00:18:30,300 --> 00:18:32,133 Go get me some tracing paper. 397 00:18:32,166 --> 00:18:33,416 [DOORBELL RINGS] 398 00:18:37,100 --> 00:18:37,400 Come in. 399 00:18:39,500 --> 00:18:40,450 Hi, doll! 400 00:18:40,483 --> 00:18:44,433 Oh, Mona. What are you so dressed up for? 401 00:18:44,466 --> 00:18:47,216 Oh, don't tell me it's a holy day, 402 00:18:47,250 --> 00:18:49,100 and I didn't go to Temple. 403 00:18:49,133 --> 00:18:51,250 Now God's gonna punish me, 404 00:18:51,283 --> 00:18:53,333 and there goes my career in animation. 405 00:18:53,366 --> 00:18:56,333 No. No, Franny. 406 00:18:56,366 --> 00:18:57,466 I'm getting married. 407 00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:01,330 Oh, Mona! 408 00:19:01,660 --> 00:19:03,400 Oh, I hope it wasn't that waiter last night 409 00:19:03,433 --> 00:19:07,500 that gave you the two end cuts. 410 00:19:07,830 --> 00:19:09,660 'Cause, you know, he left with the Yorkshire pudding guy arm in arm. 411 00:19:11,100 --> 00:19:12,483 No. 412 00:19:13,160 --> 00:19:14,160 It's my boss. 413 00:19:14,500 --> 00:19:16,160 [GASPS] 414 00:19:16,500 --> 00:19:18,830 We were saying goodnight at the Waldorf, 415 00:19:18,116 --> 00:19:19,466 and he asked me to come back to the house. 416 00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:22,166 And I thought, "What, did I forget to clean my drain?" 417 00:19:22,200 --> 00:19:24,416 [CHUCKLES] No. No. 418 00:19:24,450 --> 00:19:26,466 He had something to give me. 419 00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:29,466 Look. Oh, Mona! 420 00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,233 It's gorgeous. 421 00:19:32,266 --> 00:19:34,500 Oh, I'm so happy for you. 422 00:19:34,830 --> 00:19:37,166 No one deserves it more than you. 423 00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:38,250 Meanwhile, do you think this looks like Blinky? 424 00:19:40,333 --> 00:19:41,433 Funny. 425 00:19:41,466 --> 00:19:43,660 I gotta go. 426 00:19:43,100 --> 00:19:44,660 He chartered a plane. 427 00:19:44,100 --> 00:19:45,450 Oh. 428 00:19:45,483 --> 00:19:47,150 Oh, and by the way... - Yeah? 429 00:19:47,183 --> 00:19:48,450 ...you know that cedar closet? - Yeah? 430 00:19:48,483 --> 00:19:50,450 Turns out... it was for me! 431 00:19:52,660 --> 00:19:53,216 For me. 432 00:19:53,250 --> 00:19:54,116 Oh. For me. 433 00:19:57,183 --> 00:20:00,116 Miss Fine. What? 434 00:20:00,150 --> 00:20:02,233 Well, Miss Fine, please sit down. 435 00:20:02,266 --> 00:20:04,283 Look, if it's about my lipstick 436 00:20:04,316 --> 00:20:06,233 on your pillow shams, don't lose any sleep over it. 437 00:20:06,266 --> 00:20:07,450 It's never coming out. 438 00:20:07,483 --> 00:20:09,333 Uh, no. 439 00:20:09,366 --> 00:20:11,483 No, Miss Fine, when I first hired you, 440 00:20:12,160 --> 00:20:14,216 I thought I was just getting a nanny. 441 00:20:14,250 --> 00:20:17,466 But, well, you've turned out to be so much more. 442 00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:20,116 [HUMS "STRANGERS IN THE NIGHT"] ♪ La-da da-da-da ♪ 443 00:20:20,150 --> 00:20:22,416 ♪ Da-da-da-dee-da La-da-da-da-da... 444 00:20:22,450 --> 00:20:25,100 [CLICKS] 445 00:20:25,133 --> 00:20:31,283 [CONTINUES HUMMING "STRANGERS IN THE NIGHT"] 446 00:20:33,483 --> 00:20:36,830 Mr. Sheffield, what's this all about? 447 00:20:36,116 --> 00:20:38,160 Well, I-I-I don't want you to think 448 00:20:38,500 --> 00:20:40,100 this job is going nowhere, 449 00:20:40,133 --> 00:20:44,500 and that when the children are grown, you'll be all alone. 450 00:20:44,830 --> 00:20:47,116 I want to take care of you for the rest of your life. 451 00:20:47,150 --> 00:20:49,000 Oh, could I just call my mother? 452 00:20:49,330 --> 00:20:50,133 Oh, wait. I'll fill her in. 453 00:20:50,166 --> 00:20:51,233 I'll fill her in. 454 00:20:54,160 --> 00:20:56,250 Miss Fine, there's something I want to give you. 455 00:20:56,283 --> 00:20:56,416 Oh, wait a sec, wait a sec. Wait. 456 00:20:59,366 --> 00:21:00,116 [RING CLATTERS] 457 00:21:02,250 --> 00:21:03,233 Go ahead. [GIGGLES] 458 00:21:06,266 --> 00:21:09,100 It would give me great pleasure if you would... 459 00:21:09,133 --> 00:21:10,660 Yeah? Yeah? Ha. 460 00:21:12,116 --> 00:21:13,400 Let me buy you a condominium. 461 00:21:15,660 --> 00:21:16,166 Huh? 462 00:21:16,200 --> 00:21:18,216 For your retirement. 463 00:21:18,250 --> 00:21:21,160 A condo? 464 00:21:21,500 --> 00:21:24,000 That's what you wanna give me for my future? 465 00:21:24,330 --> 00:21:26,830 Oh, I'll tell you, I have never been so-- 466 00:21:26,116 --> 00:21:28,183 Would it include carpet and plantation shutters? 467 00:21:28,216 --> 00:21:30,283 Yeah, of course. Pets okay? 468 00:21:30,316 --> 00:21:32,400 'Cause I'd probably want a cat. 469 00:21:32,433 --> 00:21:34,233 Whatever you want. 470 00:21:34,266 --> 00:21:36,366 So... Happy? 471 00:21:36,400 --> 00:21:37,266 Yeah. 472 00:21:39,233 --> 00:21:41,830 Oy. This is gonna take forever. 473 00:21:44,450 --> 00:21:47,133 Oh, Mr. Sheffield, by the way... 474 00:21:47,166 --> 00:21:49,183 I'm sorry about last night. 475 00:21:49,216 --> 00:21:52,160 Oh, Miss Fine. Don't you worry about that. 476 00:21:52,500 --> 00:21:54,233 I think we should put that whole incident behind us. 477 00:21:54,266 --> 00:21:56,250 And after all... nothing happened, right? 478 00:21:56,283 --> 00:21:59,133 Right. Hm. 479 00:21:59,166 --> 00:22:02,350 ♪ Hey there, Georgy Girl Walking down the street so-- ♪ 480 00:22:11,450 --> 00:22:16,483 [THEME MUSIC PLAYS]