1 00:00:05,333 --> 00:00:07,330 Nada. 2 00:00:09,483 --> 00:00:13,216 Ever since me and Mr. Sheffield started to heat things up, 3 00:00:13,250 --> 00:00:16,660 we haven't had one minute alone together. 4 00:00:16,100 --> 00:00:19,830 Open a mouth. Just say, "Go away. 5 00:00:19,116 --> 00:00:21,350 Leave us alone. We want privacy." 6 00:00:21,383 --> 00:00:25,330 Go away. Leave us alone. We want privacy. 7 00:00:25,660 --> 00:00:26,160 There you go. 8 00:00:28,250 --> 00:00:30,450 -Ah, Miss Fine. -Oh, hi. 9 00:00:30,483 --> 00:00:32,830 Sylvia, would you mind, 10 00:00:32,116 --> 00:00:33,466 I'd like some time alone with your daughter. 11 00:00:36,316 --> 00:00:39,383 There are some Hershey's Kisses under the cushions on the couch. 12 00:00:45,433 --> 00:00:47,150 Oh, Miss Fine, 13 00:00:47,183 --> 00:00:50,133 so nice finally to have some time alone together. 14 00:00:50,166 --> 00:00:51,450 -Yeah. -I've missed you. 15 00:00:51,483 --> 00:00:52,433 Me, too, you. 16 00:00:52,466 --> 00:00:54,830 [Sylvia] Which couch? 17 00:00:54,116 --> 00:00:55,250 The office! 18 00:00:57,183 --> 00:00:58,366 You were saying? 19 00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:05,166 I... I know I've been dragging my feet a little with regards to, 20 00:01:05,200 --> 00:01:07,000 our relationship, 21 00:01:07,330 --> 00:01:08,450 but I'm gonna change that. 22 00:01:08,483 --> 00:01:11,250 I think it's time you and I had a date. 23 00:01:11,283 --> 00:01:14,483 [gasp] Oh, my God. You're asking me out on a date? 24 00:01:15,160 --> 00:01:17,450 Yes, yes, yes. I was thinking Friday night? 25 00:01:17,483 --> 00:01:22,500 Oh, I can't. I gotta cook for the Sabbath. 26 00:01:22,830 --> 00:01:24,483 -Oh, really? -Yeah, right. Where are we going? 27 00:01:26,116 --> 00:01:28,183 Well, as you know, I've been dying to get 28 00:01:28,216 --> 00:01:30,233 Elton John to star in my new musical. 29 00:01:30,266 --> 00:01:32,166 -Yeah. -It so happens, he's invited me 30 00:01:32,200 --> 00:01:35,266 to the premiere of his new movie, Tantrums & Tiaras. 31 00:01:35,300 --> 00:01:37,400 Oh, Mr. Sheffield, 32 00:01:37,433 --> 00:01:40,200 you don't know how happy this makes me. 33 00:01:40,233 --> 00:01:42,433 Not only have you asked me out on a date, 34 00:01:42,466 --> 00:01:45,383 but you actually trust me to not be concerned 35 00:01:45,416 --> 00:01:47,166 that I'm going to embarrass you 36 00:01:47,200 --> 00:01:49,266 in front of a celebrity. 37 00:01:58,000 --> 00:01:59,116 Of course. 38 00:02:03,100 --> 00:02:04,383 ♪ She was working in a bridal shop ♪ 39 00:02:04,416 --> 00:02:06,660 ♪ In Flushing, Queens ♪ 40 00:02:06,100 --> 00:02:07,233 ♪ Til her boyfriend kicked her out ♪ 41 00:02:07,266 --> 00:02:08,450 ♪ In one of those crushing scenes ♪ 42 00:02:08,483 --> 00:02:10,400 ♪ What was she to do? Where was she to go? ♪ 43 00:02:10,433 --> 00:02:13,466 ♪ She was out on her fanny ♪ 44 00:02:14,160 --> 00:02:15,300 ♪ So over the bridge from Flushing ♪ 45 00:02:15,333 --> 00:02:17,116 ♪ To the Sheffield's door ♪ 46 00:02:17,150 --> 00:02:19,200 ♪ She was there to sell make up but the father saw more ♪ 47 00:02:19,233 --> 00:02:21,216 ♪ She had style, she had flair she was there ♪ 48 00:02:21,250 --> 00:02:22,316 ♪ That's how she became ♪ 49 00:02:22,350 --> 00:02:25,500 ♪ The Nanny ♪ 50 00:02:25,830 --> 00:02:27,450 ♪ Who would have guessed that the girl we described ♪ 51 00:02:27,483 --> 00:02:30,150 ♪ Was just exactly what the doctor prescribed? ♪ 52 00:02:30,183 --> 00:02:31,350 ♪ Now, the father finds her beguiling ♪ 53 00:02:31,383 --> 00:02:33,116 ♪ Watch out C.C., ♪ 54 00:02:33,150 --> 00:02:34,216 ♪ And the kids are actually smiling ♪ 55 00:02:34,250 --> 00:02:35,333 ♪ Such joie de vivre ♪ 56 00:02:35,366 --> 00:02:37,330 ♪ She's the lady in red ♪ 57 00:02:37,660 --> 00:02:41,100 ♪ When everybody else is wearing tan ♪ 58 00:02:41,133 --> 00:02:43,116 ♪ The flashy girl from Flushing ♪ 59 00:02:43,150 --> 00:02:44,433 ♪ The Nanny named Fran ♪ 60 00:02:47,383 --> 00:02:50,330 I just don't understand why Maxwell 61 00:02:50,660 --> 00:02:53,660 would ask Nanny Fine on a date. 62 00:02:53,100 --> 00:02:56,250 I should be going to Elton John's dinner, not her. 63 00:02:57,283 --> 00:03:00,330 I am the one with sophistication. 64 00:03:02,150 --> 00:03:04,166 I am the one with savvy. 65 00:03:05,350 --> 00:03:08,283 Why would he pick her over me? 66 00:03:08,316 --> 00:03:10,316 He doesn't like you! 67 00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:23,200 Why? 68 00:03:26,830 --> 00:03:28,316 Oh, Miss Babcock, I would love to help you, 69 00:03:28,350 --> 00:03:29,483 but ever since the heart attack, 70 00:03:30,160 --> 00:03:31,300 the one you're partly responsible for, 71 00:03:31,333 --> 00:03:33,400 I get easily winded. 72 00:03:33,433 --> 00:03:36,100 I can't speak and work at the same time. 73 00:03:42,450 --> 00:03:45,166 Well, what am I doing wrong? 74 00:03:45,200 --> 00:03:48,830 Well, for one thing, you've known him for 25 years 75 00:03:48,116 --> 00:03:49,300 or half your life, 76 00:03:49,333 --> 00:03:51,283 and you don't know the names of his children. 77 00:03:53,300 --> 00:03:55,350 Okay. Good, good. 78 00:03:55,383 --> 00:03:57,483 Learn kids' names. That's a start. 79 00:04:02,500 --> 00:04:04,400 You know, this is nice. We're helping each other. 80 00:04:04,433 --> 00:04:07,183 Well, that's what friends are for. 81 00:04:07,216 --> 00:04:10,450 You know, there's a very strange fungus in Brighton's shower. 82 00:04:10,483 --> 00:04:13,000 -Would you mind? -Sure, pal. 83 00:04:16,150 --> 00:04:17,250 Oh, Niles. 84 00:04:17,283 --> 00:04:19,433 Do you think Miss Babcock's upset 85 00:04:19,466 --> 00:04:22,116 that I asked Nanny Fine out on a date? 86 00:04:22,150 --> 00:04:23,216 Oh, no, sir. 87 00:04:23,250 --> 00:04:25,160 I'd hate for her to think I didn't like her. 88 00:04:25,500 --> 00:04:27,330 Wherever would she get that idea? 89 00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:30,366 I don't know, 90 00:04:30,400 --> 00:04:32,483 maybe from some big fat butler 91 00:04:33,160 --> 00:04:34,266 screaming it in her face! 92 00:04:42,160 --> 00:04:43,283 Oh, stop it! 93 00:04:43,316 --> 00:04:45,333 I know those are bloody Tic Tacs. 94 00:04:47,333 --> 00:04:49,466 Sick to death of the whole thing. 95 00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:52,283 I want the two of you to stop behaving like children. 96 00:04:52,316 --> 00:04:54,116 Good God, Miss Fine and I 97 00:04:54,150 --> 00:04:56,116 are the only two around here behaving like adults. 98 00:05:00,333 --> 00:05:05,300 -It's our first date! -Oh, Fran, this is so exciting! 99 00:05:05,333 --> 00:05:09,100 Okay, okay. We gotta calm down. I mean, I'm not 16 anymore. 100 00:05:09,133 --> 00:05:11,283 -But isn't he a babe? -Yes! 101 00:05:11,316 --> 00:05:14,316 -Look how great our names fit together! -I know! 102 00:05:14,350 --> 00:05:16,216 Oh, God. 103 00:05:16,250 --> 00:05:19,166 Oh, boy. That's gonna kill me tomorrow. 104 00:05:21,330 --> 00:05:24,830 Oh, Val, can you believe this is happening? 105 00:05:24,116 --> 00:05:26,466 First, he cops a feel on a week that I'm retaining. 106 00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:30,160 -Is that luck or what? -Wait! 107 00:05:30,500 --> 00:05:32,660 -Then he lets you remodel. -Yeah. 108 00:05:32,100 --> 00:05:34,400 -Then he asks you out. -Oh, finally. 109 00:05:34,433 --> 00:05:37,350 My feet are firmly planted on the ground. 110 00:05:37,383 --> 00:05:39,400 Now I gotta make sure to speed things up 111 00:05:39,433 --> 00:05:41,266 before my tuchus is there too. 112 00:05:43,160 --> 00:05:46,383 Hey, you know, I do isometrics to keep my butt firm. 113 00:05:46,416 --> 00:05:48,333 You know, I'm doing them right now. 114 00:05:48,366 --> 00:05:50,100 Get off my bed, Val. 115 00:05:53,000 --> 00:05:56,160 I tell you, you know what's really going to impress Mr. Sheffield? 116 00:05:56,500 --> 00:05:58,266 When I tell him at the dinner 117 00:05:58,300 --> 00:06:01,160 that I have already met Elton John. 118 00:06:01,500 --> 00:06:02,400 Get out of here. How? 119 00:06:02,433 --> 00:06:06,283 Well, remember that Sheffield vacation in the south of France 120 00:06:06,316 --> 00:06:08,300 that I couldn't get out of? 121 00:06:08,333 --> 00:06:10,266 You mean the one where you told Mr. Sheffield 122 00:06:10,300 --> 00:06:14,330 if anything happens to Grace, you're the only one with her blood type? 123 00:06:14,660 --> 00:06:15,500 Uh-huh. 124 00:06:16,416 --> 00:06:20,500 Well, anyway, Elton was staying at that same hotel. 125 00:06:20,830 --> 00:06:22,350 I saw him playing tennis and I yelled at him, 126 00:06:22,383 --> 00:06:24,350 "Yoo-hoo!" 127 00:06:24,383 --> 00:06:27,100 You always know the perfect thing to say. 128 00:06:29,216 --> 00:06:30,366 Well, you know, Val, 129 00:06:30,400 --> 00:06:33,100 when you travel in circles like I do... 130 00:06:33,133 --> 00:06:34,416 you just get glib. 131 00:06:36,433 --> 00:06:38,350 Kids, kids, kids! Come in here! 132 00:06:38,383 --> 00:06:40,416 You're not gonna believe the most incredible thing has happened. 133 00:06:40,450 --> 00:06:42,283 Your father is taking us 134 00:06:42,316 --> 00:06:45,830 to a screening of Elton John's new movie 135 00:06:45,116 --> 00:06:48,250 and then there's a big private dinner party afterwards. 136 00:06:48,283 --> 00:06:50,830 -Are you serious? -Uh-huh. 137 00:06:50,116 --> 00:06:52,250 I'm going to Elton John's dinner party? 138 00:06:52,283 --> 00:06:54,200 No. 139 00:06:54,233 --> 00:06:56,383 Isn't that great? 140 00:06:56,416 --> 00:07:00,233 It's just me and your father. It's our first date! 141 00:07:00,266 --> 00:07:03,383 You're not going and you're not going. 142 00:07:03,416 --> 00:07:07,660 Everybody that's going to Elton John's private dinner party, 143 00:07:07,100 --> 00:07:08,333 take one step forward. 144 00:07:17,160 --> 00:07:20,660 Well, Niles, is everyone ready? 145 00:07:20,100 --> 00:07:23,133 Maxwell, Margaret, Brighton, Gracie? 146 00:07:24,483 --> 00:07:28,150 Very good. And... 147 00:07:29,183 --> 00:07:30,266 And what? 148 00:07:30,300 --> 00:07:33,000 Oh, for heaven's sake, he's your favorite. 149 00:07:33,330 --> 00:07:34,200 Little Sidney. 150 00:07:37,350 --> 00:07:39,133 There are four? 151 00:07:42,466 --> 00:07:47,660 Oh, right. I know him. 152 00:07:47,100 --> 00:07:49,500 Yep. Yep, I've seen that face. 153 00:07:49,830 --> 00:07:50,216 Of course you have. 154 00:07:51,160 --> 00:07:52,350 [chuckles] 155 00:07:52,383 --> 00:07:55,350 Niles, are you done with my picture of us with Macaulay Culkin? 156 00:07:58,183 --> 00:08:01,433 -[door bell ringing] -[humming a tune] 157 00:08:13,250 --> 00:08:15,266 Sylvia. You look... 158 00:08:15,300 --> 00:08:16,466 amazing. 159 00:08:19,316 --> 00:08:20,383 Thank you. 160 00:08:20,416 --> 00:08:23,250 It's from the Jo Anne Worley collection. 161 00:08:26,333 --> 00:08:30,830 Ma, how could you wear pants to a formal affair? 162 00:08:32,283 --> 00:08:34,116 This isn't a gown? 163 00:08:40,450 --> 00:08:43,330 Oh, and here I am thinking 164 00:08:43,660 --> 00:08:46,466 I'm looking so sexy with this high slit. 165 00:08:55,660 --> 00:08:57,160 Hi. 166 00:08:57,500 --> 00:09:00,000 Oh, this is gonna be such a great night 167 00:09:00,330 --> 00:09:03,350 and I'm so happy you guys get to share it with me. 168 00:09:03,383 --> 00:09:06,133 But if I see your faces after the screening, you're dead. 169 00:09:06,166 --> 00:09:08,330 Because that's when the date kicks in. 170 00:09:10,166 --> 00:09:13,266 Sweetheart, do you remember the night of your prom when you came home 171 00:09:13,300 --> 00:09:15,166 with your dress all disheveled 172 00:09:15,200 --> 00:09:17,433 and your bra sticking out of your purse? 173 00:09:17,466 --> 00:09:19,416 Yeah. 174 00:09:19,450 --> 00:09:23,183 Let's hope history repeats itself! 175 00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:27,830 My God, you look lovely. 176 00:09:28,250 --> 00:09:29,283 Thank you. 177 00:09:32,330 --> 00:09:35,216 But it's Fran's night. Compliment her. 178 00:09:37,450 --> 00:09:40,660 Well, I suppose we should get going. 179 00:09:40,100 --> 00:09:41,350 Yes, yes. We should. 180 00:09:41,383 --> 00:09:45,300 Let's go, Margaret, Brighton, Gracie, Sidney! 181 00:09:49,483 --> 00:09:52,133 You guys go ahead, I'll be out in a minute. 182 00:09:52,166 --> 00:09:54,250 I just want to check my face. I'll be okay. 183 00:09:56,450 --> 00:09:58,383 Now I know that we haven't talked since 184 00:09:58,416 --> 00:10:00,466 John-John went through with the wedding 185 00:10:02,466 --> 00:10:06,330 but I really love this guy, 186 00:10:06,660 --> 00:10:09,433 so please help me to make everything go good tonight. 187 00:10:09,466 --> 00:10:13,483 I suppose a sign that you heard me would be too much to ask? 188 00:10:14,160 --> 00:10:15,300 Come on, Miss Fine. 189 00:10:15,333 --> 00:10:18,183 Oh, I'm afraid the limo's a tad crowded 190 00:10:18,216 --> 00:10:20,100 so you're gonna have to sit on my lap. 191 00:10:24,466 --> 00:10:26,830 That'll do. 192 00:10:36,233 --> 00:10:40,116 -I want some popcorn. -I'll take you, Gracie. 193 00:10:42,350 --> 00:10:43,433 I'll go. 194 00:10:43,466 --> 00:10:46,500 No, no, no, Miss Fine, Miss Fine. I'll go. 195 00:10:46,830 --> 00:10:48,466 Remember, you're not my nanny tonight. 196 00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:51,116 Tonight, you're my date. 197 00:10:52,233 --> 00:10:56,316 And you're my escort. You see to my needs. 198 00:10:59,233 --> 00:11:00,433 You do for me. 199 00:11:04,183 --> 00:11:06,183 -You want something? -Rolo's. 200 00:11:10,283 --> 00:11:14,483 He doesn't give a rat's patootie if I know the kids' names. 201 00:11:15,160 --> 00:11:16,400 All he cares about is Nanny Fine. 202 00:11:16,433 --> 00:11:18,366 You've still got a shot. 203 00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:21,830 Why else would he ask you to look after Sidney? 204 00:11:27,660 --> 00:11:29,366 -When did he do that? -You know, in the limo. 205 00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:31,133 When we stopped for gas. 206 00:11:31,366 --> 00:11:33,830 Yetta's. 207 00:11:39,830 --> 00:11:40,266 Well, where is he? 208 00:11:40,300 --> 00:11:42,116 Oh, dear. I thought he was with you. 209 00:11:42,466 --> 00:11:45,160 Sidney. Sidney. 210 00:11:51,100 --> 00:11:53,160 Hey, that's that hotel we stayed at. 211 00:11:53,500 --> 00:11:56,133 Yeah. Look, there's Elton playing tennis. 212 00:11:56,166 --> 00:12:00,330 That's where I talked to him. That's where I said, "Yoo-hoo". 213 00:12:00,660 --> 00:12:01,133 [man]You wanna tell me what happened? 214 00:12:01,166 --> 00:12:02,333 I just lost my temper. 215 00:12:02,366 --> 00:12:04,500 This bloody woman at the end of the court 216 00:12:04,830 --> 00:12:05,266 waving to me, "Yoo-hoo". 217 00:12:08,350 --> 00:12:11,183 ...and, um, it just pissed me off. 218 00:12:19,483 --> 00:12:22,200 Oh, if Elton finds out that was me 219 00:12:22,233 --> 00:12:24,433 he's never gonna be in your father's show. 220 00:12:24,466 --> 00:12:27,500 Your father's gonna be a laughing stock. 221 00:12:27,830 --> 00:12:28,400 He's going to be totally humiliated. 222 00:12:28,433 --> 00:12:30,416 This is the worst thing I've ever done to him. 223 00:12:31,366 --> 00:12:33,183 Why don't you just go home? 224 00:12:33,216 --> 00:12:35,200 I don't wanna ruin our first date. 225 00:12:41,333 --> 00:12:42,400 This never would've happened 226 00:12:42,433 --> 00:12:44,383 if you knew your place with celebrities. 227 00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:46,483 Ma! 228 00:12:47,160 --> 00:12:49,366 You have to learn to use decorum. 229 00:12:54,316 --> 00:12:55,450 Oh, Miss Close... 230 00:13:02,830 --> 00:13:05,116 I loved you inSunset Boulevard. 231 00:13:09,416 --> 00:13:12,366 Okay, think. Think! 232 00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:16,266 I gotta get through that dinner without Elton recognizing me. 233 00:13:16,300 --> 00:13:18,330 I need a disguise. 234 00:13:20,183 --> 00:13:22,830 Yetta. 235 00:13:25,000 --> 00:13:26,366 What? 236 00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:28,450 When you coming out of there? 237 00:13:28,483 --> 00:13:33,166 I can't decide whether to vote for Nixon or Kennedy. 238 00:13:40,333 --> 00:13:42,233 Give me that wig, old woman! 239 00:13:43,483 --> 00:13:46,366 [clamoring] 240 00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:55,316 Oh, my God! This is just like... 241 00:13:55,350 --> 00:13:59,416 Patty Duke and Susan Hayward in theValley of the Dolls. 242 00:14:02,316 --> 00:14:04,200 You'll have to excuse them. 243 00:14:07,416 --> 00:14:10,330 They don't know how to act in front of celebrities. 244 00:14:11,830 --> 00:14:16,383 ♪ We'll live like horses ♪ 245 00:14:17,333 --> 00:14:20,283 ♪ Free rein 246 00:14:29,330 --> 00:14:32,500 Elton, Elton. Wonderful film. Wonderful. 247 00:14:32,830 --> 00:14:34,333 David, first class directing job. 248 00:14:34,366 --> 00:14:37,116 It must've been quite a challenge 249 00:14:37,150 --> 00:14:39,433 to maintain control of the piece and yet, 250 00:14:39,466 --> 00:14:43,233 you know, allow the vérité style to flow. 251 00:14:44,366 --> 00:14:46,183 Who is this guy? 252 00:14:46,216 --> 00:14:48,250 He gives a ton of money to the foundation. 253 00:14:50,330 --> 00:14:51,183 Yes, it was. 254 00:14:54,283 --> 00:14:58,160 So, Maxwell, you didn't come alone tonight, did you? 255 00:14:58,500 --> 00:15:01,250 No Elton. Actually I'm taking the opportunity 256 00:15:01,283 --> 00:15:06,150 to use this evening as a sort of a first date. 257 00:15:06,183 --> 00:15:10,316 Well, that's very flattering, but you know I'm involved. 258 00:15:13,150 --> 00:15:14,266 Oh! 259 00:15:16,350 --> 00:15:17,316 Oh, no. 260 00:15:18,466 --> 00:15:23,200 No, no, no. No. She's in the ladies' room. 261 00:15:23,233 --> 00:15:26,333 And quite a knockout, if I may say. 262 00:15:44,483 --> 00:15:47,166 Hello. 263 00:15:47,200 --> 00:15:49,366 Here she is now! 264 00:15:58,150 --> 00:16:02,233 Oh, Elton John, I am such a big fan of yours. 265 00:16:02,266 --> 00:16:05,400 Hi, I'm Fran Fine. And that movie! 266 00:16:05,433 --> 00:16:09,300 Tantrums & Tiaras, it's sure to be a classic. 267 00:16:09,333 --> 00:16:11,350 -Fran. -Yeah? 268 00:16:11,383 --> 00:16:13,150 You look awfully familiar. 269 00:16:13,183 --> 00:16:15,660 Have we ever met? 270 00:16:15,100 --> 00:16:17,333 No, no, no. That's impossible. 271 00:16:17,366 --> 00:16:21,330 And those glasses. They are fantastic. 272 00:16:21,660 --> 00:16:23,233 -Let me try them on-- -No! No! No! 273 00:16:23,266 --> 00:16:25,000 No, thank you. 274 00:16:25,330 --> 00:16:27,483 -May I see you for a moment? -Yeah, just a sec, honey. 275 00:16:28,160 --> 00:16:31,233 Tell me, Elton, whatever happened to that Kiki Dee-- 276 00:16:37,316 --> 00:16:39,433 Now I know why she's so familiar. 277 00:16:39,466 --> 00:16:42,166 I have that jacket. 278 00:16:45,150 --> 00:16:48,116 All right, will you kindly tell me what the hell is going on? 279 00:16:48,150 --> 00:16:51,160 Why are you in this ridiculous disguise? 280 00:16:51,500 --> 00:16:53,366 Well, I'm not going to tell you because you'll get mad. 281 00:16:53,400 --> 00:16:54,366 No, I-- 282 00:16:56,333 --> 00:16:57,483 No, I'm not. 283 00:17:00,166 --> 00:17:01,283 See? 284 00:17:07,450 --> 00:17:11,166 You! You're the "yoo-hoo" lady? 285 00:17:15,416 --> 00:17:18,350 You're the raving lunatic everyone's talking about? 286 00:17:18,383 --> 00:17:20,116 Come on, we're getting out of here. 287 00:17:20,150 --> 00:17:21,416 No, wait a minute. 288 00:17:21,450 --> 00:17:23,266 You might still get him to do your show. 289 00:17:23,300 --> 00:17:25,166 He didn't recognize me. 290 00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:28,200 Right now, he just thinks you're some guy with an Estelle Getty fetish. 291 00:17:31,366 --> 00:17:33,116 You know, Elton... 292 00:17:33,150 --> 00:17:35,433 Mr. Sheffield has this fabulous new musical 293 00:17:35,466 --> 00:17:37,333 that you'd be perfect for. 294 00:17:37,366 --> 00:17:39,283 Why don't you tell him about it? 295 00:17:39,316 --> 00:17:42,133 Um, yes. Right, yes. 296 00:17:42,166 --> 00:17:43,450 Yeah. Right, well... 297 00:17:43,483 --> 00:17:47,200 Yes, Elton, it's a rock musical and... 298 00:17:47,233 --> 00:17:48,383 and, uh... 299 00:17:53,233 --> 00:17:55,233 You're eating flower! 300 00:17:59,183 --> 00:18:01,433 So this is a first date for you two? 301 00:18:01,466 --> 00:18:04,483 Actually, we have been together for four years. 302 00:18:05,160 --> 00:18:08,283 -We just felt it was time-- -Waiter's hand. 303 00:18:12,330 --> 00:18:15,830 Meanwhile, this elastic waistband is so tight, 304 00:18:15,116 --> 00:18:18,383 it's cutting off my circulation. I can't even feel my own tuchus. 305 00:18:18,416 --> 00:18:20,450 Elton's tuchus. 306 00:18:28,350 --> 00:18:32,133 I think it's going very well. Don't you? 307 00:18:45,483 --> 00:18:48,316 Oh, there you are. Where did you disappear tonight? 308 00:18:48,350 --> 00:18:50,183 Well, I did what Maxwell said. 309 00:18:50,216 --> 00:18:53,266 Apparently, I'm the only one who cares about his kids. 310 00:18:53,300 --> 00:18:54,383 What are you talking about? 311 00:18:54,416 --> 00:18:56,283 Margaret took the children for ice cream. 312 00:18:56,316 --> 00:18:59,300 I'm tired. 313 00:18:59,333 --> 00:19:02,433 It's no wonder with all that running you did, Sidney. 314 00:19:02,466 --> 00:19:04,333 He kept trying to get away from me to go 315 00:19:04,366 --> 00:19:06,433 intoGeorge of the Jungle, but I got him. 316 00:19:09,366 --> 00:19:11,400 Oh, my God, you insane woman. 317 00:19:11,433 --> 00:19:13,266 You've kidnapped someone's child. 318 00:19:15,483 --> 00:19:18,350 -What? -There is no Sidney! 319 00:19:18,383 --> 00:19:20,350 I made him up, you lunatic! 320 00:19:20,383 --> 00:19:23,000 Oh, my God. We're going to prison. 321 00:19:23,330 --> 00:19:25,200 I stole someone's child? 322 00:19:25,233 --> 00:19:27,100 I thought you were trying to help me! 323 00:19:27,133 --> 00:19:30,500 Oh, you baboon. Why would I help you? 324 00:19:30,830 --> 00:19:32,283 Oh, no, no. This is all my fault. 325 00:19:32,316 --> 00:19:34,166 I have got to call that theater. 326 00:19:37,100 --> 00:19:39,660 Okay, you can go. Here's ten for you 327 00:19:39,100 --> 00:19:41,266 and ten for your mom. 328 00:19:43,250 --> 00:19:46,160 But you promised us $50. 329 00:19:49,183 --> 00:19:52,830 And if you'd remembered the part about needing your insulin 330 00:19:52,116 --> 00:19:54,000 you'd be getting $50. 331 00:19:59,133 --> 00:20:01,660 Well, Max, it's been a pleasure. 332 00:20:02,183 --> 00:20:04,830 Elton, please, before you go, 333 00:20:04,116 --> 00:20:05,316 would you mind autographing 334 00:20:05,350 --> 00:20:08,000 your new CD The Big Picture for me? 335 00:20:08,330 --> 00:20:09,100 Of course. 336 00:20:09,133 --> 00:20:11,830 Do you happen to have one on you? 337 00:20:12,483 --> 00:20:14,416 I'm not the sort of artist 338 00:20:14,450 --> 00:20:17,830 that goes around carrying his own CD... 339 00:20:17,116 --> 00:20:19,183 but look at here. 340 00:20:24,116 --> 00:20:26,483 And do you need one for an aunt, maybe? 341 00:20:27,160 --> 00:20:28,466 Or an optician? 342 00:20:32,500 --> 00:20:36,330 -Thank you. -Elton, David. Good luck with the film. 343 00:20:36,660 --> 00:20:37,300 And about that show of yours, Max. 344 00:20:37,333 --> 00:20:40,660 Sounds great. Let's talk about it Tuesday. 345 00:20:40,100 --> 00:20:43,316 -Wonderful, wonderful. -Bye-bye, nice meeting you. 346 00:20:44,216 --> 00:20:46,316 Wow, wow, wow. 347 00:20:47,466 --> 00:20:49,660 That went very well. 348 00:20:49,100 --> 00:20:51,466 I'm telling you, Maxwell Sheffield. 349 00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:55,116 I am good for you. 350 00:20:55,150 --> 00:20:58,200 So, I take it there's gonna be a second date? 351 00:20:59,400 --> 00:21:01,000 You bet. 352 00:21:03,250 --> 00:21:06,433 Oh. Elton forgot to autograph the CDs! 353 00:21:06,466 --> 00:21:10,183 Elton. Elton! 354 00:21:10,216 --> 00:21:12,150 Yoo-hoo! 355 00:21:30,133 --> 00:21:32,366 And one for Hadassah, Rego Park. 356 00:21:34,250 --> 00:21:39,000 And just a few generic, "Glenn Close." 357 00:21:39,330 --> 00:21:41,183 I'll fill in the greetings. 358 00:21:47,133 --> 00:21:49,166 Would you like a sour ball? 359 00:22:02,830 --> 00:22:04,433 [theme music playing] 360 00:22:19,250 --> 00:22:21,830 [theme music ends]