1 00:00:02,483 --> 00:00:06,100 How lucky is your grandmother getting married at her age? 2 00:00:06,133 --> 00:00:10,330 I mean, do you know the odds of a woman over 35 finding a husband? 3 00:00:10,660 --> 00:00:13,000 One in 1245.6. 4 00:00:16,660 --> 00:00:18,216 Uh-huh. How much do you weigh, Ma? 5 00:00:18,250 --> 00:00:20,183 Who can remember numbers? 6 00:00:23,250 --> 00:00:26,200 ♪ Like a virgin. Hui! ♪ 7 00:00:28,450 --> 00:00:32,266 Wow, Yettie. I want whatever you're on. 8 00:00:32,300 --> 00:00:36,216 Well, uh, this is for inflammation. 9 00:00:36,250 --> 00:00:40,283 -Oh. -This is for spastic colon. 10 00:00:40,316 --> 00:00:46,383 And I got an ounce of glaucoma medication that my doctor grew. 11 00:00:46,416 --> 00:00:52,100 But I don't use it because it gets me kind of loose. 12 00:00:53,483 --> 00:00:55,316 You mean sexually? 13 00:00:55,350 --> 00:00:56,433 No. 14 00:01:01,160 --> 00:01:04,000 ♪ Touched for the very First time ♪ 15 00:01:05,350 --> 00:01:09,233 Look at her, all atwitter like an 85-year-old schoolgirl. 16 00:01:09,266 --> 00:01:10,466 Well, Ma, enjoy it. 17 00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:14,183 At least you get to dance at your mother's wedding. 18 00:01:14,216 --> 00:01:15,483 Because at the rate that I'm going, 19 00:01:16,160 --> 00:01:17,133 you'll be coming to mine in an urn. 20 00:01:17,166 --> 00:01:18,350 There, I said it before you did. 21 00:01:20,216 --> 00:01:21,350 [doorbell rings] 22 00:01:22,250 --> 00:01:24,330 Oh, that's him. 23 00:01:24,660 --> 00:01:25,400 -Let me get the door. -Okay. 24 00:01:25,433 --> 00:01:29,100 Oh, I'm so excited. 25 00:01:29,133 --> 00:01:34,330 I feel like flying to him on gossamer wings. 26 00:01:41,300 --> 00:01:43,660 [doorbell rings] 27 00:01:46,500 --> 00:01:48,830 I'm coming. 28 00:01:57,316 --> 00:01:59,333 Hey, baby. 29 00:02:00,200 --> 00:02:03,330 Sameleh. 30 00:02:03,660 --> 00:02:05,166 My Yiddish mama. 31 00:02:08,100 --> 00:02:09,366 Oh, well, this is a first. 32 00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:12,233 Your mouth is open and there's no chewed-up Snack Wells in it. 33 00:02:14,466 --> 00:02:18,300 Ma. When you told us that you were engaged, 34 00:02:18,333 --> 00:02:21,300 you neglected to mention that he's Black. 35 00:02:23,150 --> 00:02:24,483 You're Black? 36 00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:28,200 Yes. 37 00:02:28,233 --> 00:02:30,500 No wonder. 38 00:02:37,483 --> 00:02:39,333 ♪ She was working In a bridal shop ♪ 39 00:02:39,366 --> 00:02:41,160 ♪ In Flushing, Queens ♪ 40 00:02:41,500 --> 00:02:42,183 ♪ Til her boyfriend Kicked her out ♪ 41 00:02:42,216 --> 00:02:43,366 ♪ In one of those Crushing scenes ♪ 42 00:02:43,400 --> 00:02:45,300 ♪ What was she to do? Where was she to go? ♪ 43 00:02:45,333 --> 00:02:48,400 ♪ She was out on her fanny ♪ 44 00:02:48,433 --> 00:02:50,200 ♪ So over the bridge From Flushing ♪ 45 00:02:50,233 --> 00:02:52,160 ♪ To the Sheffield's door ♪ 46 00:02:52,500 --> 00:02:54,660 ♪ She was there to sell make-up But the father saw more ♪ 47 00:02:54,100 --> 00:02:55,400 ♪ She had style! She had flair! She was there ♪ 48 00:02:55,433 --> 00:02:57,183 ♪ That's how she became ♪ 49 00:02:57,216 --> 00:02:59,433 ♪ The Nanny ♪ 50 00:02:59,466 --> 00:03:02,383 ♪ Who would have guessed That the girl we described ♪ 51 00:03:02,416 --> 00:03:05,660 ♪ Was just exactly What the doctor prescribed? ♪ 52 00:03:05,100 --> 00:03:06,333 ♪ Now, the father Finds her beguiling ♪ 53 00:03:06,366 --> 00:03:08,500 ♪ Watch out C.C. ♪ 54 00:03:08,830 --> 00:03:09,233 ♪ And the kids Are actually smiling ♪ 55 00:03:09,266 --> 00:03:10,300 ♪ Such joie de vivre ♪ 56 00:03:10,333 --> 00:03:12,000 ♪ She's the lady in red ♪ 57 00:03:12,330 --> 00:03:16,100 ♪ When everybody else Is wearing tan ♪ 58 00:03:16,133 --> 00:03:18,116 ♪ The flashy girl From Flushing ♪ 59 00:03:18,150 --> 00:03:19,366 ♪ The Nanny named Fran! ♪ 60 00:03:29,160 --> 00:03:31,383 Oh, Dr. Miller, I had the weirdest dream last night. 61 00:03:31,416 --> 00:03:36,500 Grandma Yetta was running down a football field, carrying a bridal bouquet 62 00:03:36,830 --> 00:03:39,450 and Count Basie was waiting for her in the end zone 63 00:03:39,483 --> 00:03:42,216 when Miss Piggy comes walking by 64 00:03:42,250 --> 00:03:45,830 carrying a very lean corned beef sandwich, 65 00:03:46,416 --> 00:03:50,283 and says, "You are not getting any younger." 66 00:03:50,316 --> 00:03:54,660 Clearly the dream indicates that you are bitter and upset 67 00:03:54,100 --> 00:03:56,416 at the fact that your 85-year-old grandmother's getting married 68 00:03:56,450 --> 00:03:59,233 for the second time when you haven't been married once. 69 00:03:59,266 --> 00:04:01,166 Really? 70 00:04:01,200 --> 00:04:04,483 Now, you see, I just thought I had a thing for jazz and The Muppets, duh. 71 00:04:07,233 --> 00:04:10,250 Fran, you have to shift your focus. 72 00:04:10,283 --> 00:04:14,116 Now, Isn't there anything in your life besides marriage that you're passionate about? 73 00:04:14,150 --> 00:04:17,466 Like some inner dream that you've always kept secret? 74 00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:20,233 -Like my deepest, darkest fantasy? -Right. 75 00:04:20,266 --> 00:04:21,400 Wanna tell me about it? 76 00:04:24,000 --> 00:04:27,150 -Well, it's a little freaky. -Oh, that's good. 77 00:04:28,316 --> 00:04:30,133 I mean, that's all right. 78 00:04:32,830 --> 00:04:34,250 Fran, it's never too late to follow a dream. 79 00:04:34,283 --> 00:04:37,383 You've got to stop dwelling on the things that aren't working in your life 80 00:04:37,416 --> 00:04:40,466 and start making the things that you want to happen happen. 81 00:04:41,000 --> 00:04:43,450 Uh-huh. You know, Doc, you are absolutely right. 82 00:04:43,483 --> 00:04:48,830 I'm gonna stop obsessing on wanting to be married and follow my dream. 83 00:04:48,116 --> 00:04:49,216 From here on in, 84 00:04:49,250 --> 00:04:51,333 I am set out on a path where I'm gonna be 85 00:04:51,366 --> 00:04:55,100 a more interesting, mature, independent woman. 86 00:04:56,100 --> 00:04:58,500 Maybe then he'll propose. 87 00:05:07,133 --> 00:05:11,660 Here's your invitation to Yetta's engagement party at the home. 88 00:05:13,660 --> 00:05:17,183 Now, don't be late. Dinner is served promptly at 2:00 p.m. 89 00:05:19,216 --> 00:05:22,433 I cannot think of a more nauseous-making 90 00:05:22,466 --> 00:05:25,830 mind-numbing evening. 91 00:05:25,116 --> 00:05:27,266 -Well, I'm going. -Me too. Where's mine? 92 00:05:30,330 --> 00:05:33,350 Oh, I'm sorry. The maximum capacity at the home is 640. 93 00:05:33,383 --> 00:05:36,233 It was between you and the woman handing out Jimmy Dean samples 94 00:05:36,266 --> 00:05:38,100 at the A & P yesterday. 95 00:05:42,250 --> 00:05:45,150 I'm not invited? Okay. Fine. 96 00:05:45,183 --> 00:05:47,283 Because I've got lots of better things to do. 97 00:05:48,233 --> 00:05:51,483 Yetta? Where's my pretty Yetta? 98 00:05:54,333 --> 00:05:59,400 Mr. Sheffield, I have decided to pursue my lifelong dream 99 00:05:59,433 --> 00:06:02,200 and become a successful career woman. 100 00:06:02,233 --> 00:06:06,316 I finally have a direction, a goal, a clear path. 101 00:06:06,350 --> 00:06:08,433 I thought you wanted to get married and have children. 102 00:06:08,466 --> 00:06:12,133 Wait, are you asking? Because I could chuck that other pipe dream. 103 00:06:15,660 --> 00:06:18,483 Yeah, right. Well, back to my clear path. 104 00:06:19,160 --> 00:06:22,350 I am going to become a TV weather girl. 105 00:06:22,383 --> 00:06:24,300 Well, I think that's the perfect job for you. 106 00:06:24,333 --> 00:06:25,433 You'll be wonderful at that. 107 00:06:25,466 --> 00:06:28,116 Well, thank you. Thank you very much. 108 00:06:28,150 --> 00:06:31,150 Daddy, I loved my lesson. I wanna become a jockey. 109 00:06:31,183 --> 00:06:33,316 Oh, I think that'd be a perfect job for you. 110 00:06:33,350 --> 00:06:35,160 You'll be wonderful at that. 111 00:06:35,500 --> 00:06:36,183 Thank you. 112 00:06:42,450 --> 00:06:44,500 What just happened here? 113 00:06:45,133 --> 00:06:47,150 You were just humoring me, weren't you? 114 00:06:47,183 --> 00:06:49,416 You no more think I could be a TV weather girl 115 00:06:49,450 --> 00:06:51,416 than you think Gracie could be a jockey. 116 00:06:51,450 --> 00:06:55,416 Well, of course I do. I mean, you're beautiful and photogenic 117 00:06:55,450 --> 00:06:57,200 and she's short. 118 00:07:01,466 --> 00:07:04,350 Mr. Sheffield, I'm not a child. 119 00:07:04,383 --> 00:07:06,660 I'm gonna be 30. 120 00:07:09,100 --> 00:07:10,466 Now, I can handle honesty. 121 00:07:13,216 --> 00:07:15,330 No, Ms. Fine, no, you can't. 122 00:07:15,660 --> 00:07:16,400 Well, why don't you just try me? 123 00:07:16,433 --> 00:07:18,366 I don't think you could be a TV weather girl. 124 00:07:18,400 --> 00:07:21,250 [crying] Why? 125 00:07:23,350 --> 00:07:26,300 Well, let's start with your voice and a microphone. 126 00:07:28,233 --> 00:07:31,483 You know, there is a fine line between honest and cruel. 127 00:07:32,160 --> 00:07:34,250 Oh, Ms. Fine, it's unrealistic. 128 00:07:34,283 --> 00:07:36,316 I'm not being cruel, am I, Niles? 129 00:07:36,350 --> 00:07:39,830 [Niles]Absolutely not, sir. She asked for the truth. 130 00:07:42,283 --> 00:07:45,233 -Niles. -Sorry, Ms. Fine, Christmas is coming. 131 00:07:48,150 --> 00:07:50,183 Well, I know what's going on here. 132 00:07:50,216 --> 00:07:54,500 You are just terrified that I might become immensely successful, 133 00:07:54,830 --> 00:07:56,466 leave you, and your whole world will fall apart. 134 00:07:57,000 --> 00:07:59,350 Well, now, that's a tad arrogant, don't you think? 135 00:07:59,383 --> 00:08:01,416 I wouldn't dream of keeping you here 136 00:08:01,450 --> 00:08:04,200 just to satisfy my own selfish needs. 137 00:08:04,233 --> 00:08:05,366 Oh, really? 138 00:08:05,400 --> 00:08:08,830 Well, then I got news for you. 139 00:08:08,116 --> 00:08:10,830 There is no hope for us, mister. 140 00:08:14,216 --> 00:08:15,433 All right, what just happened here? 141 00:08:15,466 --> 00:08:17,266 [Niles] Well, let's review, sir. 142 00:08:17,300 --> 00:08:19,160 [tape rewinding] 143 00:08:23,100 --> 00:08:25,266 [doorbell ringing] 144 00:08:25,300 --> 00:08:28,333 [both] If that's my mother, tell her I'm not here. 145 00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:33,200 Hi, Sammy. 146 00:08:33,233 --> 00:08:35,216 Hi, Yetta. 147 00:08:35,250 --> 00:08:38,183 Oh, Fran, I just love your voice. 148 00:08:38,216 --> 00:08:41,830 I knew where the house was before I even got out of the car. 149 00:08:43,100 --> 00:08:44,400 Hello, Samuel. Mother. 150 00:08:46,150 --> 00:08:49,366 Why don't you guys go take a seat in the living room 151 00:08:49,400 --> 00:08:52,283 and we'll catch up with you in a minute. 152 00:08:52,316 --> 00:08:55,216 -All right, all right. -Just go take a seat. 153 00:08:55,250 --> 00:08:58,830 Well, send up a flare when you get to the couch. 154 00:09:00,660 --> 00:09:02,500 Ma, why are you being so cold to them? 155 00:09:02,830 --> 00:09:03,433 Is it because he's Black? 156 00:09:03,466 --> 00:09:07,283 Please. I, of all people, am not prejudiced. 157 00:09:07,316 --> 00:09:09,300 You forget, I come from a time 158 00:09:09,333 --> 00:09:13,160 when the Jews were kept out of the Oyster Bay Country Club. 159 00:09:13,500 --> 00:09:17,830 Just you, Ma, and that's because you stole a steak. 160 00:09:21,100 --> 00:09:23,166 -You know why I'm upset? -Why? 161 00:09:23,200 --> 00:09:26,330 My father is not even dead 25 years 162 00:09:26,660 --> 00:09:28,400 and already she's running off with another man. 163 00:09:30,266 --> 00:09:32,200 They're not running anywhere, Ma. 164 00:09:34,250 --> 00:09:37,160 I'm sorry, I just can't accept this. 165 00:09:37,500 --> 00:09:40,116 Ma, I also had problems 166 00:09:40,150 --> 00:09:42,483 with Yetta getting married before me 167 00:09:43,160 --> 00:09:47,283 but I channeled my anxieties into a new career. 168 00:09:47,316 --> 00:09:49,660 And that is what you're gonna have to do. 169 00:09:49,100 --> 00:09:53,466 You gotta find something new in your life and then focus on that. 170 00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:57,116 I haven't tried the Viennetta log from the Breyers people. 171 00:10:00,200 --> 00:10:04,316 Hello, there. Maxwell Sheffield. And you must be Sammy. 172 00:10:04,350 --> 00:10:08,160 Yes. And you must be Fran's husband. 173 00:10:08,500 --> 00:10:09,450 Warming up to him yet, Ma? 174 00:10:11,283 --> 00:10:16,150 I will never accept another man as my father. 175 00:10:16,183 --> 00:10:19,266 Sammy, you know, you're a little confused, sweetie. 176 00:10:19,300 --> 00:10:22,183 Mr. Sheffield is not my husband. 177 00:10:22,216 --> 00:10:26,150 He's just the killer of weather girl dreams. 178 00:10:26,183 --> 00:10:28,333 Would you please get off that? I am no such thing! 179 00:10:28,366 --> 00:10:31,100 You are the killer of weather girl dreams! 180 00:10:31,133 --> 00:10:33,233 You cannot expect to just walk in off the streets 181 00:10:33,266 --> 00:10:35,200 and straight into broadcasting. 182 00:10:35,233 --> 00:10:37,383 You know, my nephew works down at the television station. 183 00:10:37,416 --> 00:10:39,450 Maybe he can help you out. 184 00:10:39,483 --> 00:10:42,383 Well, there's your in, Ms. Fine. You think I should look for another nanny? 185 00:10:42,416 --> 00:10:44,150 Well, maybe you know him, Bryant Gumbel? 186 00:10:46,283 --> 00:10:48,300 Bryant Gumbel's your nephew? 187 00:10:48,333 --> 00:10:49,433 Papa! 188 00:10:56,300 --> 00:10:59,660 You know, Fran, if Bryant Gumbel hires you, 189 00:10:59,100 --> 00:11:01,166 doing the weather could be just the beginning for you. 190 00:11:01,200 --> 00:11:04,200 Oh, I know. You know that movie, Up Close & Personal? 191 00:11:04,233 --> 00:11:07,333 Michelle Pfeiffer started out as a weather girl, and look who she became. 192 00:11:07,366 --> 00:11:11,660 -Who? -Well, Michelle Pfeiffer for one thing. 193 00:11:11,100 --> 00:11:12,216 Oh, yeah, yeah. 194 00:11:12,250 --> 00:11:14,283 Val, you go over there with the cue cards 195 00:11:14,316 --> 00:11:18,500 and, Gracie, you come up with just some cute little news headline 196 00:11:18,830 --> 00:11:20,183 and then throw it over to me in Weather Central. 197 00:11:20,216 --> 00:11:22,150 Okay. 198 00:11:22,183 --> 00:11:25,300 "Today President Clinton and Chinese president Jiang Zemin 199 00:11:25,333 --> 00:11:29,316 just signed a pact eliminating nuclear proliferation in the Far East." 200 00:11:33,383 --> 00:11:36,500 She talks good. 201 00:11:36,830 --> 00:11:40,233 And now, let's go to everyone's favorite weather girl, Fran "Fair Skies" Fine. 202 00:11:40,266 --> 00:11:41,300 Fran? 203 00:11:41,333 --> 00:11:43,383 Thank you, Grace. 204 00:11:43,416 --> 00:11:49,116 Well, it's going to be a crisp, delicious day in the Tri-state area. 205 00:11:51,300 --> 00:11:53,333 So... 206 00:11:53,366 --> 00:11:58,200 my forecast would be to wear something playful and autumny. 207 00:12:00,200 --> 00:12:03,500 But if you happen to be single, 208 00:12:03,830 --> 00:12:05,233 and there's a cold front coming, ladies, 209 00:12:05,266 --> 00:12:07,100 I would wear this. 210 00:12:09,266 --> 00:12:11,830 God willing, you'll get pneumonia 211 00:12:11,116 --> 00:12:13,366 and one, two, three, you'll meet a nice doctor. 212 00:12:20,250 --> 00:12:23,500 Oh, Niles, take out my Canali tuxedo, would you? 213 00:12:23,830 --> 00:12:25,160 I have to go down to my lawyer's office. 214 00:12:25,500 --> 00:12:28,316 Oh, you know, sir, that's right near the studio where Ms. Fine is auditioning. 215 00:12:28,350 --> 00:12:31,416 You might want to drop by and ruin everything. 216 00:12:33,450 --> 00:12:35,400 Would you just stop it? 217 00:12:35,433 --> 00:12:37,400 You really think I'm that insecure? 218 00:12:37,433 --> 00:12:39,150 Look, even if Ms. Fine gets this job, 219 00:12:39,183 --> 00:12:41,333 it doesn't mean she's necessarily gonna leave us. 220 00:12:44,330 --> 00:12:46,830 -Ready, Daddy. -All right, sweetheart. 221 00:12:46,116 --> 00:12:48,160 -Let's go over it one more time. -Okay. 222 00:12:48,500 --> 00:12:50,183 "Fran, I really miss you 223 00:12:50,216 --> 00:12:53,466 and you have to come home because I'm afraid to be alone." 224 00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:57,500 Excellent. Excellent. 225 00:12:57,830 --> 00:12:59,333 -Now, remember, wait for my signal. -Okay. 226 00:12:59,366 --> 00:13:02,250 Got it? Good. 227 00:13:02,283 --> 00:13:05,483 You know, I can't believe you're using me to manipulate someone like this. 228 00:13:06,160 --> 00:13:08,333 It's so Fran. 229 00:13:10,433 --> 00:13:12,166 Thank you, sweetheart. 230 00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:21,166 Oh! Bryant Gumbel. Bryant Gumbel. 231 00:13:22,216 --> 00:13:23,383 Excuse me? 232 00:13:26,233 --> 00:13:29,300 Oh, I'm Fran Fine. Uncle Sammy recommended me. 233 00:13:29,333 --> 00:13:32,660 Oh, yeah, Fran. You made it. 234 00:13:34,200 --> 00:13:36,333 Oh, I'm just so glad that we had an opportunity 235 00:13:36,366 --> 00:13:38,233 to meet before the wedding. 236 00:13:38,266 --> 00:13:41,330 You know, I'm gonna make sure that you're sitting between me and Ma 237 00:13:41,660 --> 00:13:43,350 so you're not surrounded by a bunch of nuts. 238 00:13:43,383 --> 00:13:46,250 Lesley Stahl! Lesley Stahl! 239 00:13:46,283 --> 00:13:49,350 Oh, Lesley, I love you, I love you. 240 00:13:49,383 --> 00:13:52,200 Is that her real hair? 241 00:13:52,233 --> 00:13:54,133 So where's my weather set? 242 00:13:54,166 --> 00:13:55,450 What weather set? 243 00:13:55,483 --> 00:13:58,283 You know, the one with the temperatures and the maps 244 00:13:58,316 --> 00:14:00,166 and the clouds that keep rolling over and over. 245 00:14:00,200 --> 00:14:02,830 Fran, we don't have a weather set on this show. 246 00:14:02,416 --> 00:14:04,830 No weather girl? 247 00:14:04,116 --> 00:14:07,330 Oh, but that's what I'm here for. 248 00:14:07,660 --> 00:14:08,466 Are you sure you don't wanna reconsider 249 00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:12,433 because I got an Aunt Ida with a Nielsen box. 250 00:14:12,466 --> 00:14:16,660 You know, we do have an opening for an editorial commentator. 251 00:14:16,100 --> 00:14:17,200 Would you be interested in auditioning for that? 252 00:14:17,233 --> 00:14:20,433 Sure. I'd go for editorial commentator. 253 00:14:20,466 --> 00:14:23,216 -Whatever the hell that is. -Lance. Great. Lance? 254 00:14:23,250 --> 00:14:26,330 Why don't we get her audition down on tape? 255 00:14:26,660 --> 00:14:27,300 Would you like a hairdresser? 256 00:14:27,333 --> 00:14:30,266 Oh, why, you think it's a little too subdued for TV? 257 00:14:30,300 --> 00:14:32,160 Might not fit on TV. 258 00:14:40,116 --> 00:14:41,200 Boy, come here. 259 00:14:45,830 --> 00:14:48,216 Are you taking anyone to this thing, Saturday night? 260 00:14:48,250 --> 00:14:51,133 Well, let's see, am I taking a date 261 00:14:51,166 --> 00:14:53,200 or am I taking... 262 00:14:55,316 --> 00:14:57,166 -You. -Saturday. 263 00:15:02,266 --> 00:15:04,333 Master Brighton, did she ask you to take her with you Saturday? 264 00:15:04,366 --> 00:15:06,330 Yes. 265 00:15:06,660 --> 00:15:08,166 Does she know that you're not going to Yetta's party 266 00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:11,450 but that she'll be helping you man the Klingon booth at the Star Trek convention? 267 00:15:15,166 --> 00:15:18,433 No, but I mean, maybe I should tell her. It's just so cruel. 268 00:15:24,466 --> 00:15:26,450 It's a wee bit crueler than that, captain. 269 00:15:34,160 --> 00:15:35,216 You ready to do this? 270 00:15:35,250 --> 00:15:36,333 -Absolutely. -Okay. I'll tell you what we'll do. 271 00:15:36,366 --> 00:15:39,166 I will give you a topic off the top of my head 272 00:15:39,200 --> 00:15:42,000 -and you just run with it, okay? -No problemo. 273 00:15:42,330 --> 00:15:43,200 Good. Gene therapy. 274 00:15:43,233 --> 00:15:45,416 -Gene therapy. Got it. -Gene therapy. 275 00:15:46,250 --> 00:15:47,450 Fran Fine test. 276 00:15:47,483 --> 00:15:52,366 In five, four, three, two... 277 00:15:52,400 --> 00:15:55,100 Hi, I'm Fran Fine. 278 00:15:55,133 --> 00:15:56,366 How are you? 279 00:15:58,283 --> 00:16:02,330 I'm here to do an editorial commentary on gene therapy. 280 00:16:02,660 --> 00:16:03,350 Well, if you want my opinion, 281 00:16:03,383 --> 00:16:06,483 I think that there is nothing more therapeutic 282 00:16:07,160 --> 00:16:08,283 than slipping into a pair of jeans 283 00:16:08,316 --> 00:16:12,216 that make your tush look hot in a pair of ooh-la-la Sassons. 284 00:16:13,366 --> 00:16:17,330 Anywho, I would just slip into those babies 285 00:16:17,660 --> 00:16:19,250 whenever I wanted to lift my spirits 286 00:16:19,283 --> 00:16:22,830 or my grade point average. 287 00:16:25,383 --> 00:16:27,350 Well, that's it for now. 288 00:16:27,383 --> 00:16:30,350 This is Fran Fine signing off, zei gezunt. 289 00:16:30,383 --> 00:16:32,000 Go with God. 290 00:16:33,416 --> 00:16:36,450 -No. No. No, no, no. -No? Oh, my God. 291 00:16:36,483 --> 00:16:38,116 Is it the hair? 292 00:16:38,150 --> 00:16:40,466 Oh, I knew I shouldn't have tried someone new. 293 00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:46,116 Fran, gene therapy is the alteration of our genes by scientists. 294 00:16:46,150 --> 00:16:48,660 But why would you go to a scientist 295 00:16:48,100 --> 00:16:50,500 when any dry cleaner could put up a hem 296 00:16:50,830 --> 00:16:51,316 and they've gotta charge more? 297 00:16:51,350 --> 00:16:53,466 Fran, no, no. Not those kind of jeans. 298 00:16:54,000 --> 00:16:56,450 DNA, genetics, our cellular infrastructure. 299 00:16:56,483 --> 00:16:59,000 Oh. 300 00:16:59,416 --> 00:17:01,283 Never mind. 301 00:17:03,383 --> 00:17:05,266 Thank you. We'll be in touch. 302 00:17:05,300 --> 00:17:07,660 Thank you, Bryant Gumbel. 303 00:17:09,350 --> 00:17:12,166 Uncle or no uncle, I'm having him committed. 304 00:17:17,450 --> 00:17:19,100 Excuse me. 305 00:17:19,133 --> 00:17:21,266 I'm gonna have to ask for your security pass back. 306 00:17:23,660 --> 00:17:25,160 Won't I need it for tomorrow? 307 00:17:29,250 --> 00:17:31,500 And the box of doughnuts. 308 00:17:36,416 --> 00:17:39,133 They're the lemon-filled ones. Nobody eats those. 309 00:17:45,166 --> 00:17:49,216 Oh, Mr. Sheffield, it was horrible. 310 00:17:49,250 --> 00:17:50,466 Ms. Fine. Ms. Fine, what happened? 311 00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:53,366 That mean lady took my doughnuts. 312 00:17:55,133 --> 00:17:58,150 No, I mean what happened with the audition? How'd it go? 313 00:17:58,183 --> 00:18:01,216 Oh, well, for starters, they didn't need a weather girl. 314 00:18:01,250 --> 00:18:05,500 They made me audition for editorial commentator. 315 00:18:05,830 --> 00:18:07,283 Yikes. 316 00:18:07,316 --> 00:18:10,366 Well, I mean that in a most supportive way, of course. 317 00:18:10,400 --> 00:18:13,400 Oh, it doesn't matter. You were right in the first place. 318 00:18:13,433 --> 00:18:15,150 You know, next time I have a dream, 319 00:18:15,183 --> 00:18:17,266 just go ahead and dump all over it. 320 00:18:17,300 --> 00:18:19,450 It'll save me the heartache. 321 00:18:19,483 --> 00:18:22,166 I wouldn't be so sure, Ms. Fine. 322 00:18:22,200 --> 00:18:23,366 I have a confession to make to you. 323 00:18:23,400 --> 00:18:25,400 You know, the real reason I came down here today 324 00:18:25,433 --> 00:18:28,350 was because, well, frankly, I was terrified you would succeed. 325 00:18:28,383 --> 00:18:30,330 -Really? -Yes. 326 00:18:30,660 --> 00:18:32,250 Furthermore, I came up with a rather elaborate ruse 327 00:18:32,283 --> 00:18:34,000 to make sure I could get you back. 328 00:18:34,330 --> 00:18:35,450 -You did? -Watch. Watch this. 329 00:18:41,100 --> 00:18:42,116 Gracie. 330 00:18:43,366 --> 00:18:45,383 Fran, I really missed you. 331 00:18:47,366 --> 00:18:50,266 And you have to come home because I'm afraid to be alone. 332 00:18:50,300 --> 00:18:51,483 [Maxwell] Never mind. 333 00:18:52,366 --> 00:18:54,000 Never mind. 334 00:18:54,330 --> 00:18:56,183 Well, we did have it all planned out. I promise. 335 00:18:57,500 --> 00:19:02,300 Oh, that's so sweet. 336 00:19:03,366 --> 00:19:05,100 But, you know, a word of advice. 337 00:19:05,133 --> 00:19:08,330 Next time you use a child to manipulate an adult, 338 00:19:08,660 --> 00:19:11,000 you gotta give them a protein, not a carbohydrate 339 00:19:11,330 --> 00:19:14,400 or they lose their concentration. 340 00:19:14,433 --> 00:19:19,150 Oh, why couldn't this have been my category? 341 00:19:21,383 --> 00:19:25,160 I could have been the next Connie Chung-Povich. 342 00:19:26,000 --> 00:19:28,316 Come on, honey, let's go home. 343 00:19:28,350 --> 00:19:30,166 Oh, wait a minute. 344 00:19:40,150 --> 00:19:41,416 May I help you? 345 00:19:41,450 --> 00:19:44,400 Yes, I'm here to meet my nephew for lunch, Bryant Gumbel 346 00:19:44,433 --> 00:19:47,150 and my little girl is anxious to meet him. 347 00:19:55,500 --> 00:19:56,416 This is my daddy. 348 00:20:03,330 --> 00:20:07,500 [piano playing] 349 00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:35,830 That was gorgeous, Sammy. 350 00:20:35,116 --> 00:20:37,160 Oh, thank you, baby. 351 00:20:37,500 --> 00:20:39,116 But let me play you my favorite. 352 00:20:40,433 --> 00:20:44,366 ♪ My Yiddishe mama ♪ 353 00:20:47,350 --> 00:20:52,150 ♪ I need her more then ever Now ♪ 354 00:20:55,160 --> 00:21:00,160 ♪ My Yiddishe mama ♪ 355 00:21:00,500 --> 00:21:05,133 ♪ I'd like to kiss That wrinkled brow ♪ 356 00:21:08,160 --> 00:21:13,233 ♪ I long to hold her hands ♪ 357 00:21:13,266 --> 00:21:19,300 ♪ Once more As in days gone by ♪ 358 00:21:22,216 --> 00:21:25,216 ♪ Mmm-mmm! ♪ 359 00:21:26,283 --> 00:21:31,233 ♪ Mmm-mmm! ♪ 360 00:21:41,200 --> 00:21:43,166 [theme music playing] 361 00:21:59,500 --> 00:22:00,233 [theme music ends]