1
00:00:03,200 --> 00:00:04,383
[sniffs]
2
00:00:04,416 --> 00:00:08,830
Niles, what is that sickeningly
sweet, overpowering smell?
3
00:00:08,116 --> 00:00:12,100
The cologne you gave me
for my birthday.
4
00:00:12,133 --> 00:00:14,416
Don't you just love it?
What's it called again?
5
00:00:14,450 --> 00:00:16,166
"Tester."
6
00:00:18,133 --> 00:00:20,316
Say, wait a minute.
7
00:00:20,350 --> 00:00:23,500
Cologne? What's that?
New oven mitts?
8
00:00:23,830 --> 00:00:26,316
And you're wearing a girdle.
9
00:00:26,350 --> 00:00:29,183
Ms. Babcock is coming home
from the sanitarium.
10
00:00:29,216 --> 00:00:30,400
This has nothing to do with her.
11
00:00:30,433 --> 00:00:32,400
I'm wearing it
because I pulled my back.
12
00:00:32,433 --> 00:00:34,366
Oh yeah, sure
and I wear a Wonderbra
13
00:00:34,400 --> 00:00:37,000
because I sprained my breasts.
14
00:00:38,450 --> 00:00:42,830
-Oh, hi, darling.
-Good morning, darling.
15
00:00:42,116 --> 00:00:43,166
Oh, what have we here?
16
00:00:43,200 --> 00:00:45,500
The proposal
from the wedding planner?
17
00:00:45,830 --> 00:00:46,116
-Uh, yeah.
-Now, tell me,
18
00:00:46,150 --> 00:00:47,266
is the caterer
gonna be charging us
19
00:00:47,300 --> 00:00:49,660
by the person or by the couple?
20
00:00:49,100 --> 00:00:52,133
Well, after all the samples
that me and Ma consumed,
21
00:00:52,166 --> 00:00:55,400
the caterer decided to charge
my side of the family
22
00:00:55,433 --> 00:00:57,383
per person as a couple.
23
00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:01,150
Well, that's outrageous.
24
00:01:01,183 --> 00:01:03,466
The bartender's doing
the same thing with your side.
25
00:01:07,660 --> 00:01:09,133
We don't really have
to use this guy.
26
00:01:09,166 --> 00:01:12,200
I mean, I could plan this
wedding myself.
27
00:01:12,233 --> 00:01:14,200
Oh, no, no, no, no.
We want it to be nice.
28
00:01:16,350 --> 00:01:19,433
I mean, you know, fancy. Classy.
29
00:01:19,466 --> 00:01:22,330
[clears throat]
When do they need the deposit?
30
00:01:24,330 --> 00:01:26,400
You don't think that I can make
a nice affair?
31
00:01:26,433 --> 00:01:30,160
Listen, I know how it's done.
You just need a very good theme.
32
00:01:30,500 --> 00:01:32,150
Something that's elegant
and understated.
33
00:01:32,183 --> 00:01:34,216
Starlight Express. Do you skate?
34
00:01:35,366 --> 00:01:37,166
Fran, it's not that
the Duchess of Kent
35
00:01:37,200 --> 00:01:38,433
wouldn't love to arrive
at the dais
36
00:01:38,466 --> 00:01:42,433
on Rollerblades,
but you're my princess.
37
00:01:42,466 --> 00:01:45,200
I want this to be the wedding
of your dreams.
38
00:01:45,233 --> 00:01:46,400
But...
39
00:01:46,433 --> 00:01:50,116
This is the wedding of mydreams.
40
00:01:50,150 --> 00:01:52,466
Sir, it's your brother
with some urgent news.
41
00:01:53,000 --> 00:01:54,150
Oh, yes, Nigel, what is it?
42
00:01:55,233 --> 00:01:57,133
Oh, my God. I see.
43
00:01:57,166 --> 00:01:59,333
Yes. Well, thank you
for calling.
44
00:01:59,366 --> 00:02:01,116
-Goodbye.
-What?
45
00:02:01,150 --> 00:02:03,116
That was Nigel.
Apparently, last night,
46
00:02:03,150 --> 00:02:05,166
my father passed away.
47
00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:08,150
Oh, honey. I'm so sorry.
48
00:02:09,500 --> 00:02:12,283
Hello, hello, I'm back.
49
00:02:12,316 --> 00:02:15,000
Well, what's with
the sourpusses? Who died?
50
00:02:20,330 --> 00:02:21,350
♪ She was working
in a bridal shop ♪
51
00:02:21,383 --> 00:02:23,330
♪ In Flushing, Queens ♪
52
00:02:23,660 --> 00:02:24,200
♪ Til her boyfriend
kicked her out ♪
53
00:02:24,233 --> 00:02:26,330
♪ In one of those
crushing scenes ♪
54
00:02:26,660 --> 00:02:27,350
♪ What was she to do?
Where was she to go? ♪
55
00:02:27,383 --> 00:02:30,400
♪ She was out on her fanny ♪
56
00:02:30,433 --> 00:02:32,100
♪ So over the bridge
from Flushing ♪
57
00:02:32,133 --> 00:02:33,416
♪ To the Sheffield's door ♪
58
00:02:33,450 --> 00:02:36,660
♪ She was there to sell makeup
but the father saw more ♪
59
00:02:36,100 --> 00:02:38,133
♪ She had style, she had flair
she was there ♪
60
00:02:38,166 --> 00:02:39,183
♪ That's how she became ♪
61
00:02:39,216 --> 00:02:41,466
♪ The Nanny ♪
62
00:02:42,000 --> 00:02:44,483
♪ Who would have guessed
that the girl we described ♪
63
00:02:45,160 --> 00:02:47,830
♪ Was just exactly
what the doctor prescribed? ♪
64
00:02:47,116 --> 00:02:48,266
♪ Now, the father
finds her beguiling ♪
65
00:02:48,300 --> 00:02:49,400
♪ Watch out C.C. ♪
66
00:02:49,433 --> 00:02:51,150
♪ And the kids
are actually smiling ♪
67
00:02:51,183 --> 00:02:52,316
♪ Such joie de vivre ♪
68
00:02:52,350 --> 00:02:54,160
♪ She's the lady in red ♪
69
00:02:54,500 --> 00:02:58,183
♪ When everybody else
is wearing tan ♪
70
00:02:58,216 --> 00:03:00,200
♪ The flashy girl
from Flushing ♪
71
00:03:00,233 --> 00:03:01,383
♪ The Nanny named Fran ♪
72
00:03:11,283 --> 00:03:13,133
Let's have the Sheffields
in here, please.
73
00:03:14,466 --> 00:03:16,400
-Max, hello.
-Chandler.
74
00:03:16,433 --> 00:03:18,100
-Thank you.
-Sit here.
75
00:03:18,133 --> 00:03:20,000
I'm just so embarrassed.
76
00:03:20,330 --> 00:03:22,166
I mean, I hardly knew Grandpa.
77
00:03:22,200 --> 00:03:25,333
But I felt close to him,
after all those heartfelt cards
78
00:03:25,366 --> 00:03:27,433
his secretary wrote us
on our birthdays.
79
00:03:29,830 --> 00:03:30,283
She never forgot.
80
00:03:30,316 --> 00:03:33,000
Oh, you know, honey,
just let it out.
81
00:03:33,330 --> 00:03:36,300
But at least you know
what happened to your grandpa.
82
00:03:36,333 --> 00:03:39,330
Mine stepped into a magician's
box in the Catskills
83
00:03:39,660 --> 00:03:41,133
and was never seen again.
84
00:03:42,266 --> 00:03:44,200
Many years later,
someone spotted him
85
00:03:44,233 --> 00:03:46,160
with a magician's assistant
in Miami.
86
00:03:46,500 --> 00:03:48,000
But nothing was ever proven.
87
00:03:49,660 --> 00:03:51,233
Please be seated.
88
00:03:51,266 --> 00:03:55,383
First of all, uh, let me say
how sorry I am for your loss.
89
00:03:55,416 --> 00:03:57,416
[sobbing]
90
00:03:57,450 --> 00:04:00,383
Oh, Maggs, it's okay.
91
00:04:00,416 --> 00:04:02,400
I cried like a baby, too,
when I realized
92
00:04:02,433 --> 00:04:04,300
how much money
we're gonna inherit.
93
00:04:04,333 --> 00:04:06,233
Brighton, please.
94
00:04:06,266 --> 00:04:08,283
Not everything is just
about money, you know.
95
00:04:08,316 --> 00:04:12,500
Really, Brighton,
have a little more sensitivity.
96
00:04:12,830 --> 00:04:15,100
It happens to be very traumatic
when a man loses his father.
97
00:04:15,133 --> 00:04:18,160
He's no longer the son
looking up to somebody.
98
00:04:18,500 --> 00:04:20,216
He's now the one
that's next in line to die.
99
00:04:20,250 --> 00:04:22,116
It's lonely. It's aging.
100
00:04:25,133 --> 00:04:26,216
Thanks, dear.
101
00:04:26,250 --> 00:04:28,500
Lean on me, baby.
102
00:04:29,433 --> 00:04:31,250
Anyway, getting down
to business,
103
00:04:31,283 --> 00:04:33,416
your father left you all...
104
00:04:33,450 --> 00:04:35,216
What? The racehorses,
the Ferrari,
105
00:04:35,250 --> 00:04:36,333
the country house in Tuscany?
106
00:04:36,366 --> 00:04:39,830
-A videotape.
-Damn.
107
00:04:39,116 --> 00:04:41,660
Brighton, please, look,
your grandfather
108
00:04:41,100 --> 00:04:43,333
may have been cold, selfish
and detached,
109
00:04:43,366 --> 00:04:46,333
but to me,
he will always be "sir."
110
00:04:48,233 --> 00:04:52,433
In any case, uh,
Mr. Sheffield Sr. made this tape
111
00:04:52,466 --> 00:04:54,450
to convey his plans,
112
00:04:54,483 --> 00:04:57,366
uh, regarding his estate.
113
00:04:57,400 --> 00:04:59,400
I can never get this thing
to work.
114
00:04:59,433 --> 00:05:01,266
Oh, give me that.
115
00:05:01,300 --> 00:05:04,183
Channel three, video one,
extended play. Go, go, go.
116
00:05:07,660 --> 00:05:08,450
To my three children
117
00:05:08,483 --> 00:05:10,283
who have enjoyed
all the privileges
118
00:05:10,316 --> 00:05:13,830
of the Sheffield name
and upbringing,
119
00:05:13,116 --> 00:05:18,183
I leave my sincere wishes
for a long and happy life
120
00:05:18,216 --> 00:05:21,150
and a few little trinkets
for the grandchildren.
121
00:05:21,183 --> 00:05:24,000
Please tell me the racehorse's
name is "Trinket."
122
00:05:25,416 --> 00:05:28,216
Yes, and what about the bulk
of his estate?
123
00:05:28,250 --> 00:05:30,100
You may be wondering
what's the plan are
124
00:05:30,133 --> 00:05:31,266
for the bulk of my estate.
125
00:05:31,300 --> 00:05:32,400
Yes.
126
00:05:32,433 --> 00:05:35,150
Well, let me explain.
127
00:05:35,183 --> 00:05:37,233
Gee, too bad you two
couldn't communicate like this
128
00:05:37,266 --> 00:05:39,500
when he was alive.
129
00:05:39,830 --> 00:05:42,316
There's a woman who was never
able to enjoy the privileges
130
00:05:42,350 --> 00:05:44,216
that come along
with being a Sheffield.
131
00:05:45,266 --> 00:05:48,333
My fourth child,
132
00:05:48,366 --> 00:05:50,660
Concepcion.
133
00:05:50,100 --> 00:05:53,100
[stutters] What? Well, where did
this fourth child come from?
134
00:05:53,133 --> 00:05:56,000
Well, I guess Concepcion
wasn't immaculate.
135
00:05:58,133 --> 00:06:01,500
To her, I leave
my entire estate.
136
00:06:01,483 --> 00:06:03,433
Well, that's that then.
137
00:06:03,466 --> 00:06:05,500
Good luck.
138
00:06:05,830 --> 00:06:06,660
Goodbye.
139
00:06:07,133 --> 00:06:08,200
Ta-ta.
140
00:06:10,160 --> 00:06:11,283
I can't believe this.
141
00:06:11,316 --> 00:06:13,200
Send her in, please.
142
00:06:17,400 --> 00:06:19,330
Hola.
143
00:06:19,660 --> 00:06:21,433
I'm Maria de la Concepcion
Bustillo Garcia Delamo
144
00:06:21,466 --> 00:06:23,500
Sheffield.
145
00:06:25,366 --> 00:06:28,116
It is your father's wish
that his estate
146
00:06:28,150 --> 00:06:31,133
in the amount of $100 million
goes to her.
147
00:06:32,116 --> 00:06:34,133
Auntie Concepcion.
148
00:06:35,300 --> 00:06:37,200
Brighton, would you
knock it off?
149
00:06:37,233 --> 00:06:39,283
Look, my father
was such a philanderer,
150
00:06:39,316 --> 00:06:42,133
he'd believe anyone
who claimed to be his child.
151
00:06:42,166 --> 00:06:44,450
What proof do we have this woman
and I are related?
152
00:06:44,483 --> 00:06:47,660
Well, let's get to know her
a little bit.
153
00:06:47,100 --> 00:06:49,100
Hi, honey. Are you married?
154
00:06:49,133 --> 00:06:51,300
Oh, well, I was living
with a man for five years,
155
00:06:51,333 --> 00:06:53,200
but I couldn't make
a commitment.
156
00:06:54,350 --> 00:06:57,400
Well, there's your DNA test.
157
00:07:05,200 --> 00:07:07,383
Oh, I cannot believe
how many people
158
00:07:07,416 --> 00:07:09,450
showed up for that memorial.
159
00:07:09,483 --> 00:07:11,416
My tongue is so dry
from putting stamps
160
00:07:11,450 --> 00:07:13,300
-on all these thank-you notices.
-Hmm.
161
00:07:13,333 --> 00:07:16,000
Are you sure I wasn't mentioned
in the will?
162
00:07:16,330 --> 00:07:18,330
He always said
I was like a son to him.
163
00:07:19,830 --> 00:07:21,133
You were. You got bubkes too.
164
00:07:24,100 --> 00:07:25,400
I'm supposed to be jumping up
and down
165
00:07:25,433 --> 00:07:27,466
because Grandpa left me
a cracked porcelain doll?
166
00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:30,150
I mean, you could buy a car with
how much that stamp collection
167
00:07:30,183 --> 00:07:31,250
you inherited is worth.
168
00:07:35,830 --> 00:07:38,383
You know, most people don't have
what we have.
169
00:07:38,416 --> 00:07:41,330
Maybe this will give you
the opportunity to understand
170
00:07:41,660 --> 00:07:43,200
something beyond
your privileged existence.
171
00:07:43,233 --> 00:07:45,283
You do know that if Dad
hasn't socked anything away,
172
00:07:45,316 --> 00:07:48,160
he's gonna have
to dip into your trust fund.
173
00:07:48,500 --> 00:07:49,483
He can do that?
174
00:07:50,160 --> 00:07:52,350
You know,
I don't believe you kids.
175
00:07:52,383 --> 00:07:55,500
You just lost your grandfather,
you just found out
176
00:07:55,830 --> 00:07:57,830
that you have a new member
of the family
177
00:07:57,116 --> 00:08:00,500
and all you three are focused on
is the money.
178
00:08:00,830 --> 00:08:01,250
I'm very disappointed in you
179
00:08:01,283 --> 00:08:02,450
and I think you should go
to your rooms
180
00:08:02,483 --> 00:08:05,200
-and really think about this.
-Sorry, Fran.
181
00:08:05,233 --> 00:08:07,400
-Yeah, well.
-Well, Brighton brought it up.
182
00:08:07,433 --> 00:08:10,660
She's always been poor.
What's it to her?
183
00:08:11,183 --> 00:08:13,100
Can you believe those kids?
184
00:08:13,133 --> 00:08:14,466
Making something out of nothing?
185
00:08:15,000 --> 00:08:16,433
They are making something
out of nothing, aren't they?
186
00:08:18,133 --> 00:08:20,160
[exclaims] After not having been
187
00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:21,266
in my apartment
for three months,
188
00:08:21,300 --> 00:08:22,350
I really had to air it out.
189
00:08:22,383 --> 00:08:25,330
It smelled like
a cat died in there.
190
00:08:25,660 --> 00:08:26,216
[gasps]
191
00:08:28,216 --> 00:08:30,116
-You have a dog.
-Oh!
192
00:08:30,150 --> 00:08:31,200
[gasps]
193
00:08:31,233 --> 00:08:33,366
We're taking care of him.
194
00:08:33,400 --> 00:08:35,233
Perhaps what you smelled
in your apartment
195
00:08:35,266 --> 00:08:38,330
was the stench
of your decaying youth.
196
00:08:40,300 --> 00:08:44,283
You know, Niles, I learned
something at the place.
197
00:08:46,133 --> 00:08:49,483
If 220 volts of electricity
can't hurt me,
198
00:08:50,160 --> 00:08:52,366
300 pounds of butler sure can't.
199
00:08:55,133 --> 00:08:57,166
Well, are you happy to have
your little friend home?
200
00:08:57,200 --> 00:08:59,250
Oh, it's all right.
201
00:09:03,283 --> 00:09:05,330
So, isn't it a pity that
202
00:09:05,660 --> 00:09:08,266
Maxwell's father left
all his money to a trollop?
203
00:09:08,300 --> 00:09:10,300
Oh, he left something for me?
204
00:09:11,300 --> 00:09:12,300
Oh, you meant her.
205
00:09:13,483 --> 00:09:15,330
So Nanny Fine,
what are you gonna do
206
00:09:15,660 --> 00:09:16,400
now that the wedding's off?
207
00:09:16,433 --> 00:09:20,216
Well, who said anything
about the wedding being off?
208
00:09:20,250 --> 00:09:22,483
[chuckles] Nanny Fine,
without his inheritance,
209
00:09:23,160 --> 00:09:25,250
Maxwell will run out of money
like that.
210
00:09:25,283 --> 00:09:28,330
It takes a lot of money
to keep you looking that cheap.
211
00:09:30,183 --> 00:09:33,830
Well, for your information,
it would not matter to me
212
00:09:33,116 --> 00:09:34,483
if Maxwell
were completely broke,
213
00:09:35,160 --> 00:09:38,000
because I am not in it
for the money.
214
00:09:38,330 --> 00:09:40,233
I'm in it for love.
215
00:09:40,266 --> 00:09:43,500
Well, isn't that sweet?
216
00:09:43,830 --> 00:09:44,283
We'll see if you feel
the same way
217
00:09:44,316 --> 00:09:47,116
when Maxwell has to move in
with you and your mother.
218
00:09:48,233 --> 00:09:52,316
Think about it, Nanny Fine.
[laughing]
219
00:09:58,466 --> 00:09:59,450
[burps]
220
00:10:06,200 --> 00:10:08,250
Hi, honey.
221
00:10:08,283 --> 00:10:12,216
Bad news. The doctor says
I gotta quit the paper route.
222
00:10:12,250 --> 00:10:14,250
I'm getting too big
for the bike.
223
00:10:16,660 --> 00:10:19,383
Darling, come here and let Daddy
give you some sugar.
224
00:10:19,416 --> 00:10:20,383
[burps]
225
00:10:23,100 --> 00:10:26,500
Uh... Look, here. I was looking
through the want ads.
226
00:10:26,830 --> 00:10:29,233
I thought I'd circle a few
things you were qualified to do.
227
00:10:29,266 --> 00:10:32,500
But there's nothing
circled here, my pet.
228
00:10:32,830 --> 00:10:33,333
No kidding.
229
00:10:38,250 --> 00:10:40,466
Oh, now, this is ridiculous.
We're overreacting.
230
00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:42,316
I mean, a smart man
like Mr. Sheffield
231
00:10:42,350 --> 00:10:44,660
isn't gonna burn through
his own money
232
00:10:44,100 --> 00:10:47,150
because he knows that he's got
his father's hundred mil coming.
233
00:10:47,183 --> 00:10:50,166
We would, but he wouldn't.
234
00:10:50,200 --> 00:10:53,483
Oh, I'm sure you're right.
There's nothing to worry about.
235
00:10:54,160 --> 00:10:56,350
If Maxwell were seriously
counting on his inheritance,
236
00:10:56,383 --> 00:10:59,433
he'd be rushing off to London
to contest the will.
237
00:10:59,466 --> 00:11:01,466
Just off to London
on the Concorde.
238
00:11:02,000 --> 00:11:03,000
Nothing to worry about.
239
00:11:08,116 --> 00:11:09,350
Uh-oh...
240
00:11:11,216 --> 00:11:14,166
Well, I must say.
So far, I am enjoying
241
00:11:14,200 --> 00:11:16,166
my return to sanity very much.
242
00:11:20,350 --> 00:11:23,660
I can't believe
this is happening.
243
00:11:23,100 --> 00:11:25,830
I love this house.
244
00:11:25,116 --> 00:11:26,400
Well, get used to it, Ma.
245
00:11:26,433 --> 00:11:29,350
Because we're one step away
from the poor house.
246
00:11:29,383 --> 00:11:31,483
[sobs] I hate the poor house.
247
00:11:35,000 --> 00:11:36,160
Look, we're just going to have
248
00:11:36,500 --> 00:11:37,416
to learn to economize.
That's all.
249
00:11:37,450 --> 00:11:41,150
I mean, the kids will get used
to wearing hand-me-downs.
250
00:11:41,183 --> 00:11:44,660
Maggie will give her skirts
to Gracie.
251
00:11:44,100 --> 00:11:45,466
Gracie will give
her skirts to me.
252
00:11:47,383 --> 00:11:49,160
What are you, nuts?
253
00:11:49,500 --> 00:11:51,450
What is the one thing
that I taught you?
254
00:11:51,483 --> 00:11:53,350
Death begins in the colon?
255
00:11:55,660 --> 00:11:58,166
That and don't give up
without a fight.
256
00:11:58,200 --> 00:12:01,366
Go and get that inheritance back
from Conception.
257
00:12:01,400 --> 00:12:04,350
Why should she wind up
with our money?
258
00:12:04,383 --> 00:12:08,116
She's not even
a real Sheffield like us.
259
00:12:11,116 --> 00:12:12,416
Ma, we're just gonna have
to learn
260
00:12:12,450 --> 00:12:15,100
to save like normal people.
261
00:12:15,133 --> 00:12:16,316
Beginning with,
262
00:12:16,350 --> 00:12:19,133
why is Mr. Sheffield
paying for this wedding?
263
00:12:19,166 --> 00:12:20,216
Isn't it traditional
264
00:12:20,250 --> 00:12:22,183
for the bride's parents
to pay for it?
265
00:12:22,216 --> 00:12:26,330
Haven't you guys
been saving for years?
266
00:12:26,660 --> 00:12:28,366
Well, we were,
but when you turned 30,
267
00:12:28,400 --> 00:12:31,483
we thought it was safe
to spend it on a Buick.
268
00:12:35,216 --> 00:12:37,433
Oh, Ma, I'm just so worried
about the Sheffields.
269
00:12:37,466 --> 00:12:40,216
I mean, they're used
to the finer things in life.
270
00:12:40,250 --> 00:12:41,433
They're not like me.
271
00:12:41,466 --> 00:12:47,100
I know what it's like to scrimp,
struggle, go hungry.
272
00:12:50,466 --> 00:12:52,266
You're gonna march your tuchus
273
00:12:52,300 --> 00:12:55,100
right down
to that gold digger's hotel
274
00:12:55,133 --> 00:12:58,400
and protect your family
from losing all of this.
275
00:12:58,433 --> 00:13:01,166
I know. Max and the kids
mean everything.
276
00:13:01,200 --> 00:13:04,100
What Max? I'm talking about me
and Daddy.
277
00:13:12,166 --> 00:13:14,830
-Hola!
-Francesca.
278
00:13:14,116 --> 00:13:16,483
Muy!
279
00:13:17,160 --> 00:13:20,416
I love what you're wearing.
You got such great taste.
280
00:13:20,450 --> 00:13:23,166
Ma, I want you
to meet Concepcion.
281
00:13:23,200 --> 00:13:26,133
-And this is my mother.
-Consuela.
282
00:13:26,166 --> 00:13:27,400
Uh, Sylvi-oh.
283
00:13:29,466 --> 00:13:34,500
[both] You see,
that's how I want my hair.
284
00:13:34,830 --> 00:13:36,416
Consuelo, you really had
a pretty hot affair
285
00:13:36,450 --> 00:13:38,400
with Maxwell'sfather, huh?
286
00:13:38,433 --> 00:13:41,216
Yes, I was a flamenco dancer.
287
00:13:41,250 --> 00:13:43,150
[exclaims]
288
00:13:43,183 --> 00:13:44,416
So, why did you stop?
289
00:13:44,450 --> 00:13:46,233
Who says I stopped?
290
00:13:47,366 --> 00:13:49,466
-Fran, come sit down.
-Okay.
291
00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:51,500
So, what can I do for you?
292
00:13:51,830 --> 00:13:53,466
Look, let's not
beat around the bush.
293
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:57,150
Where is the room service menu?
294
00:13:57,183 --> 00:13:59,216
-Here it is.
-Okay.
295
00:14:02,400 --> 00:14:07,160
It's so hard for me to accept
that this is all mine.
296
00:14:07,500 --> 00:14:10,200
-But I guess I'll have to adapt.
-Ha! [laughs]
297
00:14:11,216 --> 00:14:13,100
-You know, Concepcion.
-Mm.
298
00:14:13,133 --> 00:14:14,300
Uh, me and your brother
are gonna be married
299
00:14:14,333 --> 00:14:15,433
in less than a month
300
00:14:15,466 --> 00:14:17,200
and if you and your mother
are still in town,
301
00:14:17,233 --> 00:14:18,433
I'd just love you to come
and pay
302
00:14:18,466 --> 00:14:21,330
for the wedding.
Did I say pay?
303
00:14:21,660 --> 00:14:24,150
-We'd love to come.
-Oh, good. [laughs]
304
00:14:24,183 --> 00:14:28,000
Oh, this platter looks like
it's enough for us.
305
00:14:28,330 --> 00:14:31,283
No, no, no. It says,
"Served from 8:00 to 11:00."
306
00:14:39,300 --> 00:14:40,350
Hmm.
307
00:14:42,330 --> 00:14:44,166
Well, that's no good.
308
00:14:46,200 --> 00:14:47,450
Let me offer you
something to drink.
309
00:14:47,483 --> 00:14:49,100
Okay.
310
00:14:49,133 --> 00:14:52,183
You know, Connie.
Just a little hypothetical here.
311
00:14:52,216 --> 00:14:56,330
What if, like, you had
all of my money?
312
00:14:56,660 --> 00:14:58,216
What would be a tactful way
for me to ask for it back
313
00:14:58,250 --> 00:15:00,283
and still come out
smelling like a rose?
314
00:15:01,333 --> 00:15:04,366
Oh, you're so funny,chica.
315
00:15:04,400 --> 00:15:06,160
-"Funnychica",
-[laughs]
316
00:15:07,433 --> 00:15:09,466
Oh, you and I
are gonna be good friends.
317
00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:11,416
Oh, good. [laughs]
318
00:15:11,450 --> 00:15:13,316
-Oh, Fran.
-Yes?
319
00:15:13,350 --> 00:15:16,200
You know, my whole life,
I felt I was nothing
320
00:15:16,233 --> 00:15:18,150
and that my father
was ashamed of me.
321
00:15:18,183 --> 00:15:20,216
-Oh.
-But him leaving me
322
00:15:20,250 --> 00:15:23,200
all this money proves that
I lived in his heart.
323
00:15:23,233 --> 00:15:26,366
Oh! Oy.
324
00:15:26,400 --> 00:15:28,316
You're so lucky.
325
00:15:28,350 --> 00:15:31,330
You have a home,
beautiful children
326
00:15:31,660 --> 00:15:32,266
and a man who loves you.
327
00:15:34,350 --> 00:15:35,400
Double oy.
328
00:15:42,266 --> 00:15:44,416
You know, Niles,
when I was away at the...
329
00:15:45,316 --> 00:15:47,000
place.
330
00:15:47,330 --> 00:15:48,233
It was really scary
331
00:15:48,266 --> 00:15:51,266
because when I was all doped up,
I kept hearing these voices.
332
00:15:51,300 --> 00:15:53,330
"Maxwell loves Fran.
333
00:15:53,660 --> 00:15:54,383
You're alone and old."
334
00:15:54,416 --> 00:15:56,266
"You have to wear
a straightjacket
335
00:15:56,300 --> 00:15:59,150
to feel a man's arms
around you."
336
00:16:01,000 --> 00:16:02,660
That was you?
337
00:16:03,283 --> 00:16:09,160
You did come and visit me,
you old softy.
338
00:16:09,500 --> 00:16:11,266
Oh, God, all is right
with the world.
339
00:16:11,300 --> 00:16:13,366
Maxwell's father is dead.
340
00:16:13,400 --> 00:16:18,160
He left Maxwell broke and in
desperate need of a rich wife.
341
00:16:20,266 --> 00:16:22,166
Oh, welcome home, sir.
342
00:16:22,200 --> 00:16:25,000
Oh, is it hot in here?
343
00:16:26,166 --> 00:16:29,133
Oh, welcome home, Maxwell.
344
00:16:29,166 --> 00:16:30,400
How's the family, sir?
345
00:16:30,433 --> 00:16:33,433
Well, they're dealing with it
as best they can, Niles.
346
00:16:33,466 --> 00:16:35,400
Nigel wanted
to contest the will,
347
00:16:35,433 --> 00:16:38,000
but the lawyer seems to think
it's ironclad.
348
00:16:38,330 --> 00:16:41,830
Oh, that is despicable.
349
00:16:41,116 --> 00:16:43,483
Maxwell, let me
put this delicately.
350
00:16:44,160 --> 00:16:47,100
I have 20 mil, I'll buy
my own ring, I have no pride.
351
00:16:49,200 --> 00:16:52,400
Oh, I've missed that
sense of humor, C.C.
352
00:16:52,433 --> 00:16:54,216
Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh.
353
00:16:57,266 --> 00:17:01,500
[sighs] Oh, hi, honey.
Oh, I'm so glad you're home.
354
00:17:01,830 --> 00:17:02,200
-I missed you.
-Darling.
355
00:17:02,233 --> 00:17:03,416
-I've missed you too.
-How'd it go?
356
00:17:03,450 --> 00:17:06,166
Well, the will
is incontestable I'm afraid,
357
00:17:06,200 --> 00:17:08,216
but, Niles, now, there's a list
here of things
358
00:17:08,250 --> 00:17:10,366
from my father's estate
that have to go to Concepcion.
359
00:17:10,400 --> 00:17:13,000
Just a few dusty old antiquities
we can live without.
360
00:17:13,330 --> 00:17:16,483
Oh, sir, this just isn't fair.
Ms. Babcock's not on the list.
361
00:17:18,266 --> 00:17:20,500
Honey, I wanna talk to you.
362
00:17:20,830 --> 00:17:22,383
I've given this a lot of thought
and, you know,
363
00:17:22,416 --> 00:17:25,233
I have been poor and I can be
poor again.
364
00:17:25,266 --> 00:17:28,330
But you don't know what it is
to be broke.
365
00:17:28,660 --> 00:17:30,100
And you got the kids
to think about...
366
00:17:30,133 --> 00:17:32,166
No, wait, Fran,
what are you saying?
367
00:17:32,200 --> 00:17:34,300
Well, I'm saying that
368
00:17:34,333 --> 00:17:37,133
if you need to marry a woman
with money
369
00:17:37,166 --> 00:17:39,500
to preserve your lifestyle,
370
00:17:39,830 --> 00:17:40,133
I will understand
371
00:17:40,166 --> 00:17:43,330
and I'll let you
out of your commitment.
372
00:17:43,660 --> 00:17:45,200
It's just as easy
to marry a rich girl
373
00:17:45,233 --> 00:17:47,183
as it is to marry a poor one.
374
00:17:47,216 --> 00:17:50,150
That's an interesting saying.
I've not heard that one before.
375
00:17:50,183 --> 00:17:53,216
Me and my big mouth.
376
00:17:53,250 --> 00:17:55,350
Fran, are you sure
you don't want to reconsider?
377
00:17:55,383 --> 00:17:57,233
I mean, it is just as easy
to marry a rich man
378
00:17:57,266 --> 00:17:59,266
as it is to marry a poor one.
379
00:17:59,300 --> 00:18:00,450
Actually, it's not.
380
00:18:02,200 --> 00:18:04,100
Fran, I'm not broke.
381
00:18:04,133 --> 00:18:07,830
Far from it. I'm a very
successful Broadway producer.
382
00:18:08,283 --> 00:18:10,383
Sometimes, I'm a very successful
producer.
383
00:18:12,183 --> 00:18:13,466
I have had a hit on occasion.
384
00:18:15,200 --> 00:18:18,316
Oh, come on. Look, they're not
taking everything.
385
00:18:21,166 --> 00:18:24,250
Oh, honey. Tell me the truth.
386
00:18:24,283 --> 00:18:28,266
-You can be honest with me.
-We are not going to starve.
387
00:18:28,300 --> 00:18:30,200
Unless your mother
moves in with us.
388
00:18:31,383 --> 00:18:34,830
Oh, look, we're not
down and out yet.
389
00:18:34,116 --> 00:18:36,250
Don't you worry, I've still got
a few things up my sleeve.
390
00:18:36,283 --> 00:18:37,283
Your watch, sir.
391
00:18:41,316 --> 00:18:42,233
Thank you.
392
00:18:43,333 --> 00:18:46,450
Oh, sweetie,
don't worry about it.
393
00:18:46,483 --> 00:18:49,466
I'll replace it wholesale
from Avenue K.
394
00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:51,116
Which incidentally is gonna be
395
00:18:51,150 --> 00:18:54,450
the first letter
of your new Cartier. [laughs]
396
00:18:55,000 --> 00:18:57,133
That is so sweet of you.
397
00:18:57,166 --> 00:18:59,283
Honey, you know, I was trying
to help you today
398
00:18:59,316 --> 00:19:01,483
and I... I went over
to Waldorf Towers...
399
00:19:02,160 --> 00:19:05,116
Oh, no. Oh, Fran. Dear God.
You didn't go traipsing over
400
00:19:05,150 --> 00:19:06,283
to see Concepcion
and try to talk her
401
00:19:06,316 --> 00:19:07,366
into giving back the money
402
00:19:07,400 --> 00:19:09,450
against my father's
dying wishes?
403
00:19:09,483 --> 00:19:12,160
-Oh!
-What did she say?
404
00:19:14,330 --> 00:19:16,200
I couldn't ask her
for it, sweetie.
405
00:19:16,233 --> 00:19:18,233
I just felt so sorry for her.
406
00:19:18,266 --> 00:19:22,250
I mean, she's got all that
money, but I've got you.
407
00:19:22,283 --> 00:19:24,000
Darling.
408
00:19:24,330 --> 00:19:26,266
Do you know what worried me most
about my father dying
409
00:19:26,300 --> 00:19:28,283
and leaving me nothing?
410
00:19:28,316 --> 00:19:30,116
The leaving you nothing part?
411
00:19:31,133 --> 00:19:32,450
No.
412
00:19:32,483 --> 00:19:34,450
The thought of I'd be losingyou.
413
00:19:34,483 --> 00:19:36,350
Aww!
414
00:19:36,383 --> 00:19:38,116
I mean, you know,
I'm not the man
415
00:19:38,150 --> 00:19:40,216
I was when I proposed to you,
Fran.
416
00:19:40,250 --> 00:19:42,000
[giggles]
417
00:19:42,330 --> 00:19:44,000
Wait a minute. We are still
talking about the money.
418
00:19:44,330 --> 00:19:45,483
I mean, there wasn't like
an accident or anything?
419
00:19:47,100 --> 00:19:48,366
No, no, just the money.
420
00:19:50,483 --> 00:19:53,100
Oh, sweetie, I love you so much.
421
00:19:53,133 --> 00:19:55,233
For rich or for poorer.
422
00:19:55,266 --> 00:19:59,416
Which I'm hoping is at least
a split-level in Long Island?
423
00:19:59,450 --> 00:20:01,330
Oh!
424
00:20:01,660 --> 00:20:04,283
Darling, it won't have
to cometo that.
425
00:20:04,316 --> 00:20:08,200
I want you to have the house
of your dreams.
426
00:20:08,233 --> 00:20:11,183
But that is the house
of my dreams.
427
00:20:12,166 --> 00:20:13,183
[doorbell rings]
428
00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:17,466
-Sir.
-Niles.
429
00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:19,350
Chandler, what on Earth
are you doing here?
430
00:20:19,383 --> 00:20:23,166
I have just come from a meeting
with Concepcion
431
00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:24,483
who has decided to share
432
00:20:25,160 --> 00:20:27,183
her inheritance
with her new siblings.
433
00:20:27,216 --> 00:20:28,350
-What?
-What?
434
00:20:28,383 --> 00:20:30,330
But I don't understand.
435
00:20:30,660 --> 00:20:31,466
I thought you said you didn't
ask for the money back.
436
00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:35,366
I didn't. I just welcomed her
into the family.
437
00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:37,283
Which is all she ever
really wanted.
438
00:20:37,316 --> 00:20:39,350
-Aww!
-Oh.
439
00:20:39,383 --> 00:20:41,483
Baby, you're the greatest.
440
00:20:50,330 --> 00:20:51,216
You know, Ms. Babcock.
441
00:20:51,250 --> 00:20:53,166
With Mr. Sheffield and Ms. Fine
doing so well,
442
00:20:53,200 --> 00:20:55,250
no one would fault you
if you went back to the asylum
443
00:20:55,283 --> 00:20:57,100
for a little jolt.
444
00:20:59,266 --> 00:21:02,250
Actually, Niles, I think
I'm handling it very well.
445
00:21:02,283 --> 00:21:04,266
What?
446
00:21:04,300 --> 00:21:06,466
I'm just responding
to what you said.
447
00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:08,133
I didn't say a word.
448
00:21:10,200 --> 00:21:11,383
What do you mean
you didn't say anything?
449
00:21:11,416 --> 00:21:13,450
I distinctly heard you say
something about the asylum.
450
00:21:13,483 --> 00:21:15,316
Are you insinuating that I am
in some way...
451
00:21:21,233 --> 00:21:22,483
Wasn't Niles just here?
452
00:21:24,166 --> 00:21:25,283
I didn't see him.
453
00:21:28,660 --> 00:21:31,330
Tell your father that
I'll be back in a few weeks.
454
00:21:41,500 --> 00:21:43,000
[theme music playing]
455
00:21:58,266 --> 00:22:00,500
[theme music ends]
456
00:22:07,830 --> 00:22:08,330
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