1
00:00:07,757 --> 00:00:10,509
This is unbelievable.
It's been half an hour.

2
00:00:10,719 --> 00:00:14,221
If this was a cartoon, you'd be
looking like a ham right about now.

3
00:00:14,431 --> 00:00:16,348
There's the waitress.
Excuse me, miss.

4
00:00:16,558 --> 00:00:19,018
JOEY: Hello, miss?
- It's Phoebe.

5
00:00:19,269 --> 00:00:21,937
CHANDLER: Hi.
- Hi.

6
00:00:22,105 --> 00:00:23,647
Okay, will that be all?

7
00:00:24,524 --> 00:00:26,817
Wait, wait.
What are you doing here?

8
00:00:27,152 --> 00:00:28,318
Yeah, um, I was over there...

9
00:00:28,570 --> 00:00:31,196
...then you said, "Excuse me, miss."
So now I'm here.

10
00:00:31,948 --> 00:00:34,199
No, no. How come you're working here?

11
00:00:34,534 --> 00:00:38,537
Right. Because it's close to where I live,
and the aprons are really cute.

12
00:00:39,080 --> 00:00:40,122
Can we start over?

13
00:00:40,331 --> 00:00:42,791
- Yeah. Okay, great. I'll be over here.
- No, no, no, no.

14
00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:35,969
I don't know whether he's testing me
or just acting out...

15
00:01:36,179 --> 00:01:38,806
...but my monkey is out of control.

16
00:01:40,683 --> 00:01:44,019
He keeps erasing
the messages on my machine.

17
00:01:44,270 --> 00:01:46,522
Supposedly by accident.

18
00:01:47,190 --> 00:01:48,857
Oh, yeah, I've done that.

19
00:01:52,153 --> 00:01:55,739
And three days in a row, he got
to the newspaper before I did...

20
00:01:55,990 --> 00:01:58,200
...and peed all over the crossword.

21
00:01:58,827 --> 00:02:00,828
I've never done that.

22
00:02:01,996 --> 00:02:04,998
Now tell me she doesn't look
exactly like her sister.

23
00:02:05,542 --> 00:02:07,626
I'm saying I see a difference.

24
00:02:07,836 --> 00:02:09,044
They're twins.

25
00:02:09,295 --> 00:02:12,840
I don't care.
Phoebe's Phoebe. Ursula's hot.

26
00:02:14,425 --> 00:02:17,177
You know that thing
when we talk about things?

27
00:02:17,428 --> 00:02:19,888
- Let's not do that anymore.
- Okay.

28
00:02:20,348 --> 00:02:22,099
ROSS: Hey, guys.
ALL: Hey.

29
00:02:22,350 --> 00:02:24,560
Hey, Pheebs.
Guess who we saw today.

30
00:02:24,727 --> 00:02:26,395
Ooh. Oh, fun. Okay.

31
00:02:26,813 --> 00:02:28,272
- Um, Liam Neeson.
- No.

32
00:02:28,481 --> 00:02:29,940
- Morley Safer.
JOEY: Nope.

33
00:02:30,191 --> 00:02:31,817
- The woman who cuts my hair.
JOEY: No.

34
00:02:32,068 --> 00:02:34,111
Look, this could be a really long game.

35
00:02:34,362 --> 00:02:35,571
Your sister, Ursula.

36
00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:37,239
- Oh, really?
- Yeah.

37
00:02:37,574 --> 00:02:39,199
She works at that place, uh...

38
00:02:39,409 --> 00:02:40,534
Riff's. Yeah, I know.

39
00:02:40,785 --> 00:02:43,537
Oh, you do? She said you guys
haven't talked in years.

40
00:02:43,705 --> 00:02:45,164
Hmm? Yeah.

41
00:02:47,584 --> 00:02:49,918
So, um, is she fat?

42
00:02:52,088 --> 00:02:54,298
Not from where I was standing.

43
00:02:54,883 --> 00:02:56,300
Where were you standing?

44
00:02:59,137 --> 00:03:02,222
Uh, Pheebs, so you guys
just don't get along?

45
00:03:02,807 --> 00:03:05,350
It's mostly just dumb
sister stuff, you know?

46
00:03:05,602 --> 00:03:08,770
Everyone always thought of her
as the pretty one.

47
00:03:09,689 --> 00:03:12,357
Oh. Oh. She was the first to walk...

48
00:03:12,609 --> 00:03:15,485
...even though I did it
later that same day.

49
00:03:17,280 --> 00:03:20,991
To my parents, by then it was,
"Yeah, what else is new?"

50
00:03:21,409 --> 00:03:22,451
ROSS:
Oh.

51
00:03:22,702 --> 00:03:25,621
Pheebs, I'm sorry. I've gotta go.
I've got Lamaze class.

52
00:03:25,830 --> 00:03:29,124
Oh, and I've got earth science,
but I'll catch you in gym?

53
00:03:32,253 --> 00:03:34,338
So is this just gonna be you and Carol?

54
00:03:34,589 --> 00:03:36,256
No. Susan will be there too.

55
00:03:36,507 --> 00:03:40,802
We've got dads. We've got lesbians.
The whole parenting team.

56
00:03:41,471 --> 00:03:43,180
Well, isn't that gonna be weird?

57
00:03:43,556 --> 00:03:45,515
No. It might have been at first...

58
00:03:45,767 --> 00:03:48,310
...but now I'm comfortable
with the situation.

59
00:03:48,561 --> 00:03:50,812
- Ross, that's my jacket.
- I know.

60
00:03:58,863 --> 00:04:01,240
Hi. We're the Rostens.

61
00:04:01,449 --> 00:04:04,201
I'm J.C. And he's Michael.

62
00:04:04,452 --> 00:04:07,454
And we're having a boy and a girl.

63
00:04:08,414 --> 00:04:10,832
Good for you.
Alrighty, next?

64
00:04:12,335 --> 00:04:14,503
Hi. Um, I'm, uh... Ahem.

65
00:04:14,671 --> 00:04:16,088
I'm Ross Geller.

66
00:04:16,256 --> 00:04:18,590
And, uh, that's my boy in there.

67
00:04:18,841 --> 00:04:23,553
And, uh, this is Carol Willick,
and this is Susan Bunch.

68
00:04:24,973 --> 00:04:27,182
Susan is, um, Carol's...

69
00:04:27,350 --> 00:04:29,309
[MUMBLES]

70
00:04:33,147 --> 00:04:34,398
Who's next?

71
00:04:36,526 --> 00:04:37,818
I'm sorry, Susan is?

72
00:04:38,027 --> 00:04:40,195
- Susan is Carol's friend.
- Life partner.

73
00:04:40,405 --> 00:04:42,114
Like buddies.

74
00:04:42,865 --> 00:04:44,324
Like lovers.

75
00:04:44,492 --> 00:04:46,493
You know how close women can get.

76
00:04:48,037 --> 00:04:50,289
- Susan and I live together.
- I was married to her.

77
00:04:50,498 --> 00:04:53,208
- Carol. Not me.
- It's a little complicated.

78
00:04:53,418 --> 00:04:54,793
- But we're fine.
- Absolutely.

79
00:04:56,796 --> 00:04:58,171
So, twins. Ha.

80
00:04:58,464 --> 00:04:59,756
That's like two births.

81
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:04,511
Ouch.

82
00:05:08,433 --> 00:05:10,017
[INTERCOM BUZZES]

83
00:05:10,184 --> 00:05:12,561
[MIMICS INTERCOM BUZZING]
- To you too, Helen.

84
00:05:13,396 --> 00:05:15,939
HELEN [OVER INTERCOM]:
Nina Bookbinder is here to see you.

85
00:05:16,190 --> 00:05:18,191
Oh. Okay, send her in.

86
00:05:22,697 --> 00:05:23,739
Hi.

87
00:05:24,032 --> 00:05:26,199
- Hi, Nina. Come on in.
- You wanted to see me?

88
00:05:26,367 --> 00:05:29,077
Uh, yes.
Uh, I was just going over your data.

89
00:05:29,287 --> 00:05:31,747
You've been postdating
your Friday numbers.

90
00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:33,999
Which is bad, because?

91
00:05:34,208 --> 00:05:36,084
- Well, it throws my WENUS out of whack.
- Ha, ha.

92
00:05:37,253 --> 00:05:38,295
Excuse me?

93
00:05:39,005 --> 00:05:40,213
WENUS. Ahem.

94
00:05:40,465 --> 00:05:42,632
- Weekly Estimated...
- Oh, Net Usage Statistics.

95
00:05:42,842 --> 00:05:44,718
Right. Gotcha, gotcha.

96
00:05:44,927 --> 00:05:48,847
Won't happen again. I wouldn't
want to do anything to hurt your...

97
00:05:49,057 --> 00:05:50,182
...WENUS.

98
00:06:00,902 --> 00:06:04,071
It's not just that she's cute, okay?
It's just that...

99
00:06:04,322 --> 00:06:06,573
...she's really, really cute.

100
00:06:07,033 --> 00:06:11,161
It doesn't matter. You don't dip
your pen in the company ink.

101
00:06:14,082 --> 00:06:15,123
Ross.

102
00:06:15,416 --> 00:06:17,834
Your little creature's
got the remote again.

103
00:06:19,128 --> 00:06:21,671
Marcel. Marcel, give Rossy the remote.

104
00:06:23,132 --> 00:06:24,174
Marcel.

105
00:06:25,510 --> 00:06:28,678
Marcel, you give Rossy
the remote right now.

106
00:06:32,183 --> 00:06:33,308
You give Rossy the remote...

107
00:06:33,476 --> 00:06:34,726
[CHARACTERS SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

108
00:06:34,894 --> 00:06:37,437
- Great.
- Relax. I'll fix it.

109
00:06:39,774 --> 00:06:44,736
Oh, cool. Urkel in Spanish is Urkel.

110
00:06:46,906 --> 00:06:48,907
How did he do this?

111
00:06:49,951 --> 00:06:52,202
So tell me,
is leaving the Christmas lights up...

112
00:06:52,412 --> 00:06:54,996
...part of your plan to keep us merry
all year long?

113
00:06:55,206 --> 00:06:58,417
No, someone was supposed to take
them down around New Year's...

114
00:06:58,668 --> 00:07:00,419
...but obviously someone forgot.

115
00:07:01,045 --> 00:07:03,338
Well, someone was supposed to write:

116
00:07:03,548 --> 00:07:07,467
"Rach, take down the lights,"
and put it on the refrigera...

117
00:07:09,762 --> 00:07:11,638
How long has that been there?

118
00:07:13,182 --> 00:07:14,224
Hey, where you been?

119
00:07:14,809 --> 00:07:18,353
I went back to Riff's. I think Ursula
likes me. All I ordered was coffee.

120
00:07:18,604 --> 00:07:22,274
She brought me a tuna melt
and four plates of curly fries.

121
00:07:24,402 --> 00:07:25,610
Score.

122
00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:29,781
She is so hot.

123
00:07:29,991 --> 00:07:32,534
Listen, okay, before you do
anything Joey-like...

124
00:07:32,785 --> 00:07:35,036
...you might want to run it by, uh...

125
00:07:36,789 --> 00:07:37,831
- Yeah?
- Yeah.

126
00:07:38,082 --> 00:07:40,125
- Pheebs?
- Yeah?

127
00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:42,836
Would it be okay
if I asked out your sister?

128
00:07:43,212 --> 00:07:46,256
Why? Why would you
want to do that? Why?

129
00:07:47,508 --> 00:07:50,510
So that if we went out on a date,
she'd be there.

130
00:07:55,933 --> 00:07:58,894
Well, I mean, I'm not
my sister's, you know...

131
00:07:59,145 --> 00:08:01,271
...whatever. And, um...

132
00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:05,442
I mean, it's true,
we were one egg once.

133
00:08:06,068 --> 00:08:08,778
But, you know,
we've grown apart, so, um...

134
00:08:09,030 --> 00:08:10,739
I don't know. Why not?

135
00:08:11,115 --> 00:08:12,365
Cool. Thanks.

136
00:08:16,078 --> 00:08:17,245
You okay?

137
00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:18,997
Yeah, I'm fine.

138
00:08:19,707 --> 00:08:21,791
Do you wanna watch
Laverne y Shirley?

139
00:08:21,959 --> 00:08:24,294
[SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

140
00:08:37,725 --> 00:08:38,808
Sorry.

141
00:08:39,268 --> 00:08:40,310
- Hi.
- Hi.

142
00:08:40,561 --> 00:08:42,812
Sorry I'm late.
Uh, where's Carol?

143
00:08:43,064 --> 00:08:46,233
Stuck at school.
Some parent-teacher thing.

144
00:08:46,484 --> 00:08:49,110
You can go.
I'll get the information.

145
00:08:49,946 --> 00:08:54,533
No, no, ahem, I think I should stay.
We should both know what's going on.

146
00:08:54,742 --> 00:08:55,951
Oh, good.

147
00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:57,619
This will be fun.

148
00:08:57,828 --> 00:09:02,332
Alrighty. We're gonna start with some basic
third-stage breathing exercises.

149
00:09:02,542 --> 00:09:04,292
Mommies, get on your back.

150
00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:08,421
And, coaches, you should be
supporting Mommy's head.

151
00:09:15,346 --> 00:09:16,388
- What?
- What?

152
00:09:16,639 --> 00:09:18,348
I'm supposed to be the mommy?

153
00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:21,977
Okay, I'm gonna play
my sperm card one more time.

154
00:09:23,854 --> 00:09:27,691
I don't see why I have to miss out on the
coaching training because I'm a woman.

155
00:09:27,900 --> 00:09:29,693
I see. So, what do you propose to do?

156
00:09:29,944 --> 00:09:32,195
- I'll flip you for it.
- Flip me for it? No, no, no.

157
00:09:32,405 --> 00:09:33,947
Heads, heads, heads.

158
00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:36,616
On your back, Mom.

159
00:09:40,621 --> 00:09:44,708
All right, mommies,
take a nice, deep, cleansing breath.

160
00:09:48,129 --> 00:09:49,170
Good.

161
00:09:49,380 --> 00:09:52,299
Now imagine your vagina is opening...

162
00:09:52,508 --> 00:09:54,509
...like a flower.

163
00:10:02,393 --> 00:10:03,435
[KNOCK ON DOOR]

164
00:10:05,229 --> 00:10:07,314
Mr. Dee. How's it going, sir?

165
00:10:07,523 --> 00:10:08,815
Uh, it's been better.

166
00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:11,901
The Annual Net Usage
Statistics are in.

167
00:10:12,236 --> 00:10:14,738
- And?
- It's pretty ugly.

168
00:10:14,947 --> 00:10:18,283
We haven't seen an ANUS
this bad since the '70s.

169
00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:23,204
- So, what does this mean?
- We're gonna be laying off people.

170
00:10:23,664 --> 00:10:27,417
Listen, I know I came in late last week.
I slept funny and my hair was snarly.

171
00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:28,918
Not you.

172
00:10:29,337 --> 00:10:30,795
Relax.

173
00:10:32,923 --> 00:10:34,549
Ever have to fire anyone?

174
00:10:36,093 --> 00:10:37,135
CHANDLER:
Nina...

175
00:10:39,347 --> 00:10:43,767
Nina.

176
00:10:45,478 --> 00:10:46,686
Nina...

177
00:10:47,563 --> 00:10:49,230
Are you okay?

178
00:10:50,274 --> 00:10:51,816
Yes. Yes, I am.

179
00:10:51,984 --> 00:10:53,026
[CLEARS THROAT]

180
00:10:53,194 --> 00:10:57,697
Uh, listen, the reason that
I called you in here today was, uh...

181
00:10:58,324 --> 00:10:59,783
Please don't hate me.

182
00:11:00,409 --> 00:11:01,451
What?

183
00:11:03,663 --> 00:11:05,997
Would you like
to have dinner sometime?

184
00:11:11,253 --> 00:11:13,755
So, Pheebs, what do you want
for your birthday?

185
00:11:14,256 --> 00:11:18,468
Well, what I really want is for my mom
to be alive and enjoy it with me.

186
00:11:22,056 --> 00:11:23,390
Okay.

187
00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:27,727
Let me put it this way.
Anything from Crabtree & Evelyn?

188
00:11:27,937 --> 00:11:30,855
- Bath salts would be nice.
- Oh, okay. Good.

189
00:11:39,615 --> 00:11:41,116
What is this place?

190
00:11:41,367 --> 00:11:44,035
Look, you're cold, I have to pee,
and there's coffee.

191
00:11:44,245 --> 00:11:46,079
How bad could it be?

192
00:11:46,372 --> 00:11:48,373
I think we have an answer.

193
00:11:50,084 --> 00:11:51,292
What's she doing here?

194
00:11:51,544 --> 00:11:54,838
This could be God's way
of telling us to eat at home.

195
00:11:55,464 --> 00:11:59,384
- Think she got fired at Riff's?
- No, we were there last night.

196
00:11:59,593 --> 00:12:02,262
She kept bringing swordfish.
Are you gonna go?

197
00:12:02,513 --> 00:12:04,681
I'll wait until we order.
It's her, right?

198
00:12:04,932 --> 00:12:06,641
It looks like her.

199
00:12:06,809 --> 00:12:09,436
- Um, excuse me?
- Yeah?

200
00:12:10,146 --> 00:12:11,604
Hi, it's us.

201
00:12:15,651 --> 00:12:17,569
Right. And it's me.

202
00:12:19,947 --> 00:12:21,614
So you're here too?

203
00:12:22,116 --> 00:12:23,825
As much as you are.

204
00:12:24,326 --> 00:12:25,493
Your turn.

205
00:12:26,704 --> 00:12:29,038
- We know what we want.
- Oh, that's good.

206
00:12:30,249 --> 00:12:32,834
- All we want is two caffe lattes.
- And some biscotti cookies.

207
00:12:33,377 --> 00:12:34,669
Good choice.

208
00:12:38,924 --> 00:12:40,508
- It's definitely her.
- Yeah.

209
00:12:44,305 --> 00:12:46,181
[CHARACTERS SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

210
00:12:50,436 --> 00:12:51,603
I can't believe you.

211
00:12:51,854 --> 00:12:54,939
You still haven't told that girl
she doesn't have a job yet?

212
00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:58,651
Well, you still haven't taken down
the Christmas lights.

213
00:12:59,779 --> 00:13:03,364
Congratulations. I think you found
the world's thinnest argument.

214
00:13:04,033 --> 00:13:05,992
I'm just trying to find the right moment.

215
00:13:06,243 --> 00:13:09,287
Oh, well, that shouldn't be so hard,
now that you're dating.

216
00:13:10,706 --> 00:13:15,043
"Sweetheart, you're fired. But how
about a quickie before I go to work?"

217
00:13:18,672 --> 00:13:19,798
- Hey.
- Hey.

218
00:13:20,299 --> 00:13:21,674
[KNOCK ON DOOR]

219
00:13:22,718 --> 00:13:25,970
Once you're inside,
you don't have to knock anymore.

220
00:13:27,264 --> 00:13:28,681
I'll get it.

221
00:13:32,061 --> 00:13:33,895
Oh. Hi, Mr. Heckles.

222
00:13:34,480 --> 00:13:35,522
You're doing it again.

223
00:13:35,731 --> 00:13:37,232
We're not doing anything.

224
00:13:37,441 --> 00:13:40,568
We're just sitting around
talking quietly.

225
00:13:40,861 --> 00:13:42,862
I can hear you through the ceiling.

226
00:13:44,782 --> 00:13:46,825
My cats can't sleep.

227
00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:50,245
You don't even have cats.

228
00:13:50,454 --> 00:13:52,372
I could have cats.

229
00:13:53,916 --> 00:13:55,124
Goodbye, Mr. Heckles.

230
00:13:55,334 --> 00:13:57,877
We'll try to keep it down.

231
00:14:02,132 --> 00:14:04,759
Phoebe, can you do me a favor?

232
00:14:05,135 --> 00:14:07,011
Try this on to make sure it fits.

233
00:14:07,221 --> 00:14:11,140
Oh, my first birthday present.
Oh, this is really...

234
00:14:11,392 --> 00:14:14,602
Oh, no, no. It's for Ursula.
I just figured, you know, size-wise.

235
00:14:16,480 --> 00:14:18,898
Oh. Sure. Yeah.

236
00:14:19,108 --> 00:14:20,483
Okay, it fits.

237
00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:26,489
- Are you seeing her again tonight?
- Yep, Ice Capades.

238
00:14:26,740 --> 00:14:27,949
Wow, this is serious.

239
00:14:28,158 --> 00:14:31,452
I've never known you to pay money
for any kind of capade.

240
00:14:33,706 --> 00:14:35,456
I don't know. I like her.

241
00:14:35,708 --> 00:14:39,043
She's different.
There's, uh, something about her...

242
00:14:39,253 --> 00:14:41,546
That you like.
We get it. You like her. Great.

243
00:14:43,507 --> 00:14:46,092
Hey, Phoebe, I asked you,
and you said it was okay.

244
00:14:46,302 --> 00:14:48,219
Well, maybe now it's not okay.

245
00:14:48,554 --> 00:14:49,804
Okay.

246
00:14:50,598 --> 00:14:53,057
Well, maybe now I'm not okay
with it not being okay.

247
00:14:53,309 --> 00:14:54,392
Okay.

248
00:14:59,648 --> 00:15:01,316
Knit, good woman.
Knit. Knit.

249
00:15:12,786 --> 00:15:14,287
[KNOCK ON DOOR]

250
00:15:14,705 --> 00:15:16,456
And that's the Chrysler Building
right there.

251
00:15:16,624 --> 00:15:17,832
NINA:
Oh.

252
00:15:18,292 --> 00:15:20,877
- Nina.
- Mr. Douglas.

253
00:15:21,378 --> 00:15:22,420
Cool tie.

254
00:15:25,883 --> 00:15:26,925
She's still here.

255
00:15:27,593 --> 00:15:29,844
Yes. Yes, she is.

256
00:15:30,346 --> 00:15:31,638
Didn't I memo you on this?

257
00:15:31,889 --> 00:15:36,768
See, after I let her go, uh, I got a call
from her psychiatrist, Dr. Flanen...

258
00:15:37,019 --> 00:15:38,561
...Dr. Flanan, Dr. Flan.

259
00:15:38,896 --> 00:15:39,938
[CHANDLER CLEARS THROAT]

260
00:15:40,105 --> 00:15:44,025
And, uh, he informed me that
she took the news rather badly.

261
00:15:44,234 --> 00:15:46,986
In fact, he, uh, mentioned
the word "frenzy."

262
00:15:47,947 --> 00:15:49,280
You're kidding. She seems so...

263
00:15:49,490 --> 00:15:50,949
Oh, no, no. Nina? She's:

264
00:15:53,369 --> 00:15:55,495
In fact, if you asked her now...

265
00:15:55,704 --> 00:15:58,623
...she'd have no recollection
of being fired at all.

266
00:15:59,917 --> 00:16:01,084
That's unbelievable.

267
00:16:01,293 --> 00:16:02,961
And yet believable.

268
00:16:03,671 --> 00:16:05,713
So I decided not to fire her again...

269
00:16:05,923 --> 00:16:09,300
...until I'm sure she will be
of no threat to herself or others.

270
00:16:10,177 --> 00:16:14,472
I see. Hmm. You never really know
what's going on inside a person's head.

271
00:16:15,057 --> 00:16:18,643
Well, I guess that's why
they call it psychology, sir.

272
00:16:21,397 --> 00:16:24,482
NARRATOR [ON TV]:
The sound Mom and Dad will never forget.

273
00:16:24,692 --> 00:16:27,944
For this, after all,
is the miracle of birth.

274
00:16:28,195 --> 00:16:29,487
TEACHER:
Lights, please.

275
00:16:29,738 --> 00:16:31,197
And that's having a baby.

276
00:16:31,448 --> 00:16:33,658
Next week is our final class.

277
00:16:35,202 --> 00:16:36,786
Susan, go deep.

278
00:16:41,750 --> 00:16:44,085
CAROL:
It's impossible. It's just impossible.

279
00:16:44,294 --> 00:16:45,378
What is, honey?

280
00:16:45,629 --> 00:16:47,463
What that woman...

281
00:16:47,673 --> 00:16:48,715
...did.

282
00:16:49,758 --> 00:16:52,427
I am not doing that. Heh.

283
00:16:52,678 --> 00:16:55,805
It'll have to stay in, that's all.
Everything will be the same.

284
00:16:56,056 --> 00:16:59,058
- It'll just stay in. Ha, ha.
- Carol, honey. Shh.

285
00:16:59,268 --> 00:17:01,936
- Everything will be all right.
- What do you know?

286
00:17:02,146 --> 00:17:04,981
No one's saying to you,
"Hi, is that your nostril?

287
00:17:05,232 --> 00:17:07,734
Mind if we push
this pot roast through it?"

288
00:17:08,986 --> 00:17:10,570
Carol, sweetie.

289
00:17:10,821 --> 00:17:12,238
Cleansing breath.

290
00:17:13,574 --> 00:17:16,659
I know it's frightening.
But big picture:

291
00:17:16,910 --> 00:17:19,287
The birth part is just one day...

292
00:17:19,705 --> 00:17:23,875
...and when it's over, we'll all
be parents for the rest of our lives.

293
00:17:24,501 --> 00:17:27,045
SUSAN: I mean, that's what
this is all about, right?

294
00:17:27,296 --> 00:17:28,337
Ross?

295
00:17:29,465 --> 00:17:30,506
Ross.

296
00:17:31,300 --> 00:17:33,259
I'm gonna be a father.

297
00:17:34,428 --> 00:17:37,722
- This is just occurring to you?
- I always knew I was having a baby.

298
00:17:37,931 --> 00:17:41,225
I just never realized
the baby was having me.

299
00:17:41,643 --> 00:17:43,561
Oh, you're gonna be great.

300
00:17:43,812 --> 00:17:45,188
How could you say that?

301
00:17:45,397 --> 00:17:48,524
I can't even get Marcel
to stop eating the bathmat.

302
00:17:49,234 --> 00:17:50,610
How will I raise a kid?

303
00:17:51,111 --> 00:17:53,362
You know, Ross, some scientists
are now saying...

304
00:17:53,614 --> 00:17:56,657
...that monkeys and babies
are actually different.

305
00:18:00,037 --> 00:18:01,245
- Where are you going?
- Out.

306
00:18:01,497 --> 00:18:02,914
With?

307
00:18:03,290 --> 00:18:04,373
Yes.

308
00:18:05,084 --> 00:18:06,793
All right, can I just ask you one question?

309
00:18:08,295 --> 00:18:11,255
Have you two, you know,
like, you know?

310
00:18:12,883 --> 00:18:13,966
You know?

311
00:18:14,927 --> 00:18:15,968
Yet?

312
00:18:16,845 --> 00:18:18,805
Well, not that it's any
of your business...

313
00:18:19,056 --> 00:18:20,765
...but no, we haven't, okay?

314
00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:28,564
You meant sex, right?

315
00:18:35,322 --> 00:18:36,364
[KNOCK ON DOOR]

316
00:18:37,074 --> 00:18:39,867
- Do you have a sec?
- Uh, sure, Nina. What's up?

317
00:18:40,452 --> 00:18:43,663
I don't know. For the past couple days,
people have been avoiding me...

318
00:18:43,872 --> 00:18:45,832
...and giving me
these really strange looks.

319
00:18:46,792 --> 00:18:48,960
Oh, well, uh, maybe that's because...

320
00:18:49,128 --> 00:18:52,255
...they're, uh, jealous of us.

321
00:18:52,631 --> 00:18:53,965
Maybe.

322
00:18:54,174 --> 00:18:57,343
But that doesn't explain why
they keep taking my scissors.

323
00:18:58,262 --> 00:19:02,098
Uh, well, maybe that's, uh,
because you're getting a big raise.

324
00:19:03,475 --> 00:19:05,560
- I am?
- Sure. Why not?

325
00:19:05,853 --> 00:19:08,813
Oh, my God. You're amazing.

326
00:19:09,398 --> 00:19:11,315
Oh, you don't know.

327
00:19:12,192 --> 00:19:15,611
Helen, make sure we put through the
paperwork on Miss Bookbinder's raise.

328
00:19:16,155 --> 00:19:19,907
HELEN [OVER INTERCOM]: Still want her
psychological profile sent to personnel?

329
00:19:20,075 --> 00:19:22,994
- What?
- Helen drinks.

330
00:19:23,704 --> 00:19:25,496
Will you marry me?

331
00:19:32,087 --> 00:19:34,922
- Well, I ended up telling her everything.
- Ooh. How'd she take it?

332
00:19:35,340 --> 00:19:38,217
Pretty well.
Except for the stapler thing.

333
00:19:38,635 --> 00:19:41,721
Little tip. If you're ever
in a similar situation...

334
00:19:41,930 --> 00:19:44,682
...never, ever leave
your hand on the desk.

335
00:19:45,893 --> 00:19:48,853
Okay, I think I get how to do this.

336
00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:51,522
[SPEAKING IN SPANISH]

337
00:19:54,151 --> 00:19:56,777
Can we turn this off?
Can we make them go away?

338
00:19:57,029 --> 00:19:58,863
Because I can't watch.

339
00:19:59,239 --> 00:20:00,948
- Okay, Pheebs, they're gone.
- Okay.

340
00:20:01,700 --> 00:20:03,409
- Are you all right?
- Yeah.

341
00:20:03,619 --> 00:20:07,538
It's just, you know,
this whole stupid Ursula thing.

342
00:20:07,915 --> 00:20:09,332
Okay, Pheebs, can I ask?

343
00:20:09,583 --> 00:20:12,835
So he's going out with her.
Is it really so terrible?

344
00:20:13,045 --> 00:20:14,420
Um, yeah.

345
00:20:16,173 --> 00:20:19,342
I mean, I'm not saying
she's evil or anything.

346
00:20:19,593 --> 00:20:22,428
She's just, you know,
always breaking my stuff.

347
00:20:23,347 --> 00:20:26,641
When I was 8, I wouldn't let her
have my Judy Jetson Thermos...

348
00:20:26,850 --> 00:20:28,893
...so she threw it under the bus.

349
00:20:29,811 --> 00:20:31,604
And then there's Randy Brown...

350
00:20:31,813 --> 00:20:33,272
...who was like...

351
00:20:33,732 --> 00:20:36,651
Have you ever had a boyfriend
who was like your best friend?

352
00:20:37,611 --> 00:20:38,861
- No.
- No.

353
00:20:40,614 --> 00:20:42,907
Well, but that's what he was for me.

354
00:20:43,116 --> 00:20:45,618
And she, you know,
kind of stole him away...

355
00:20:45,869 --> 00:20:48,704
...and then broke his heart.

356
00:20:49,539 --> 00:20:52,166
And then he wouldn't
even talk to me anymore.

357
00:20:52,417 --> 00:20:56,671
He didn't want to be around anything
that looked like either one of us.

358
00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:00,174
Oh, Pheebs.

359
00:21:00,592 --> 00:21:04,762
I mean, I know Joey's not
my boyfriend or my Thermos...

360
00:21:05,847 --> 00:21:07,265
...or anything, but...

361
00:21:07,516 --> 00:21:10,268
- You won't lose him.
- You gotta talk to Joey.

362
00:21:10,769 --> 00:21:11,811
Yeah, okay.

363
00:21:12,020 --> 00:21:15,147
Come on. He doesn't know this stuff.
If he knew how you felt...

364
00:21:15,357 --> 00:21:16,983
He's falling in love with her.

365
00:21:17,192 --> 00:21:19,193
Oh, please.
They've been going out a week.

366
00:21:19,444 --> 00:21:23,739
They haven't even slept together yet.
I mean, that's not serious.

367
00:21:27,160 --> 00:21:28,244
Okay.

368
00:21:30,080 --> 00:21:31,706
Oh. Okay. Oh.

369
00:21:47,931 --> 00:21:48,973
Oh.

370
00:21:49,850 --> 00:21:52,727
Yeah, um, may we help you?

371
00:22:07,451 --> 00:22:10,786
Rachel, what are you doing? It's freezing.
Would you come inside?

372
00:22:10,996 --> 00:22:12,830
No, no, no.

373
00:22:13,040 --> 00:22:15,750
You wanted me to take them down...

374
00:22:15,959 --> 00:22:18,544
...so I'm taking them down, okay?

375
00:22:19,296 --> 00:22:20,421
[RACHEL YELLS]

376
00:22:20,589 --> 00:22:23,257
Rachel!

377
00:22:23,425 --> 00:22:25,551
I'm okay. I'm okay.

378
00:22:26,678 --> 00:22:27,928
Mr. Heckles?

379
00:22:28,847 --> 00:22:31,599
Mr. Heckles,
could you help me, please?

380
00:22:32,768 --> 00:22:35,978
See, this is just the kind of thing
I was talking about.

381
00:22:42,694 --> 00:22:44,695
[English - US - SDH]