1 00:00:02,127 --> 00:00:03,919 MONICA: Tell him. Please tell him. - Tell him. 2 00:00:04,087 --> 00:00:06,380 - Shut up. - Tell me what? 3 00:00:06,548 --> 00:00:08,882 MONICA: You won't even look at him. - Oh, come on, tell me. 4 00:00:09,050 --> 00:00:12,094 I could use another reason why women won't look at me. 5 00:00:12,262 --> 00:00:13,762 All right, all right, all right. 6 00:00:13,930 --> 00:00:15,806 Last night, I had a dream... 7 00:00:15,974 --> 00:00:19,476 ...that, um, you and I were, uh... 8 00:00:19,644 --> 00:00:21,520 Doing it on this table. 9 00:00:22,647 --> 00:00:26,608 - Wow. - Excellent dream score. 10 00:00:28,987 --> 00:00:32,114 Why...? Why would you dream that? 11 00:00:33,616 --> 00:00:36,535 More importantly, was I any good? 12 00:00:37,954 --> 00:00:40,664 Well, you were pretty damned good. Ha, ha. 13 00:00:40,832 --> 00:00:44,293 Interesting, because in my dreams, I'm surprisingly inadequate. 14 00:00:46,379 --> 00:00:50,049 Well, last night, you seemed to know your way around the table. 15 00:00:51,384 --> 00:00:53,343 [ROSS CHUCKLES] 16 00:00:53,511 --> 00:00:55,846 I love it when we share. 17 00:00:59,893 --> 00:01:00,934 CHANDLER: You okay there? 18 00:01:01,102 --> 00:01:03,312 I can't believe you two had sex in her dream. 19 00:01:04,981 --> 00:01:06,857 I'm sorry. It was a one-time thing. 20 00:01:07,025 --> 00:01:10,527 I was very drunk, and it was someone else's subconscious. 21 00:02:00,703 --> 00:02:02,412 - Hello, Rachel. - Ugh. 22 00:02:02,580 --> 00:02:04,540 Get off. 23 00:02:05,917 --> 00:02:09,920 Ooh. Oh, give me. Can you see me operating a drill press? 24 00:02:11,422 --> 00:02:13,590 I don't know. What are you wearing? 25 00:02:17,011 --> 00:02:19,888 Pheebs, why would you want to operate a drill press? 26 00:02:20,056 --> 00:02:21,431 Just for some short-term work. 27 00:02:21,599 --> 00:02:24,017 You know, till I get back some of my massage clients. 28 00:02:24,185 --> 00:02:26,103 Pirates again? 29 00:02:26,271 --> 00:02:28,814 No. Nothing like that. 30 00:02:28,982 --> 00:02:31,275 I'm just such a dummy. 31 00:02:31,442 --> 00:02:34,153 I taught this "Massage Yourself at Home" workshop. 32 00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:36,280 And they are. 33 00:02:37,490 --> 00:02:40,159 Hey, hey, Chan, she could work for you. 34 00:02:40,326 --> 00:02:42,995 Thanks, Joey. That's a good idea. 35 00:02:43,163 --> 00:02:46,206 What? I could. I could do it. What is it? 36 00:02:46,374 --> 00:02:48,041 Well, my secretary's gonna be out. 37 00:02:48,209 --> 00:02:50,335 She's having one of her boobs reduced. 38 00:02:51,880 --> 00:02:54,506 It's a whole big boob story. 39 00:02:54,674 --> 00:02:55,924 I could be a secretary. 40 00:02:56,467 --> 00:02:58,635 Well, I don't know if it's your kind of thing... 41 00:02:58,803 --> 00:03:01,555 ...because, uh, it involves a lot of being normal... 42 00:03:01,723 --> 00:03:04,391 ...ahem, for a large portion of the day. 43 00:03:04,559 --> 00:03:06,685 I could do that. 44 00:03:06,895 --> 00:03:07,936 [BEEPER BEEPING] 45 00:03:08,104 --> 00:03:10,230 - What are you playing with? - It's my new beeper. 46 00:03:10,398 --> 00:03:12,900 Why the hell does a paleontologist need a beeper for? 47 00:03:13,067 --> 00:03:17,029 Is it, like, for dinosaur emergencies? "Help, come quick! They're still extinct!" 48 00:03:17,238 --> 00:03:18,405 [CHANDLER LAUGHS] 49 00:03:18,573 --> 00:03:22,075 No, it's for when Carol goes into labor. She can get me wherever I am. 50 00:03:22,243 --> 00:03:25,954 All she has to do is dial 55-JIMBO. 51 00:03:26,789 --> 00:03:29,374 A cool phone number and a possible name for the kid. 52 00:03:30,460 --> 00:03:33,128 - I'll see you guys later. - Off to see young Ethan? 53 00:03:33,588 --> 00:03:35,214 Thank you. 54 00:03:35,965 --> 00:03:39,218 How young is young Ethan? Young? 55 00:03:39,385 --> 00:03:41,762 He's our age. 56 00:03:41,930 --> 00:03:44,014 When we were? 57 00:03:47,268 --> 00:03:49,686 - Okay, he's a senior in college. - College? 58 00:03:49,896 --> 00:03:51,396 JOEY: Ooh. - Whoa. 59 00:03:52,065 --> 00:03:54,816 And this man-child has no problem with how old you are? 60 00:03:55,026 --> 00:03:56,318 No, of course not. 61 00:03:56,486 --> 00:03:58,320 It's not even an issue... 62 00:03:58,488 --> 00:04:00,405 ...because I told him I was 22. 63 00:04:00,573 --> 00:04:01,865 - What? - What? 64 00:04:02,033 --> 00:04:05,744 - Oh, I can't pass for 22? - Well, maybe 25, 26. 65 00:04:05,912 --> 00:04:08,538 - I am 26. - There you go. 66 00:04:14,212 --> 00:04:16,213 [PHONE RINGING] 67 00:04:21,344 --> 00:04:23,095 Can you hear that? 68 00:04:23,846 --> 00:04:25,347 Yeah. Ha, ha. 69 00:04:27,058 --> 00:04:29,101 That'll stop when you pick up the phone. 70 00:04:29,310 --> 00:04:31,061 Oh. Ha, ha. 71 00:04:31,229 --> 00:04:35,065 - Okay. Ooh, I'm on. - Okay. 72 00:04:35,942 --> 00:04:38,443 [IN MELLOW VOICE] Mr. Bing's office. 73 00:04:40,238 --> 00:04:42,447 No, I'm sorry, he's in a meeting right now. 74 00:04:42,615 --> 00:04:44,324 I'm not in a meeting. I'm right... 75 00:04:44,492 --> 00:04:47,160 Will he know what this is in reference to? 76 00:04:47,328 --> 00:04:48,996 And he has your number? 77 00:04:49,205 --> 00:04:51,957 All right, I'll see that he gets the message. Bye-bye. 78 00:04:54,836 --> 00:04:56,420 - What? - [IN NORMAL VOICE] Ross says hi. 79 00:04:56,587 --> 00:04:57,879 Ah. 80 00:04:58,047 --> 00:05:00,674 This is so fun. All right, what do we do now? 81 00:05:00,883 --> 00:05:03,885 Well, now I actually have to get to work. 82 00:05:04,053 --> 00:05:05,721 "Most likely." 83 00:05:05,930 --> 00:05:07,681 [BOTH CHUCKLE] 84 00:05:09,684 --> 00:05:11,977 - Okay, I'm gonna be out there. - Okay. 85 00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:15,981 - All right. Bye-bye. - Bye-bye. 86 00:05:18,401 --> 00:05:19,735 [INTERCOM BUZZES] 87 00:05:21,529 --> 00:05:22,571 Yes? 88 00:05:22,739 --> 00:05:24,448 PHOEBE [OVER INTERCOM]: What you doing? 89 00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:30,996 Okay, windows are clean, candles are lit. 90 00:05:31,164 --> 00:05:33,332 Ooh, belt's too tight. Gotta change the belt. 91 00:05:33,499 --> 00:05:36,626 Did I turn the fish? Nope, because I made lasagna. 92 00:05:38,087 --> 00:05:41,965 - Am I out of control? - Just a touch. 93 00:05:42,133 --> 00:05:43,258 Mon, I don't understand. 94 00:05:43,426 --> 00:05:47,346 I mean, you've been dating this guy since, like, his midterms. 95 00:05:47,513 --> 00:05:51,391 I mean, why all of a sudden are you so? 96 00:05:52,935 --> 00:05:55,145 Oh. 97 00:05:55,313 --> 00:05:56,980 What? 98 00:05:57,148 --> 00:05:59,941 Could tonight be the night? 99 00:06:01,527 --> 00:06:02,694 I don't know. 100 00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:08,200 Look, he's a great guy, and I love being with him, but, you know... 101 00:06:08,368 --> 00:06:09,951 ...things happen when they happen. 102 00:06:10,119 --> 00:06:11,620 You don't plan these things. 103 00:06:13,748 --> 00:06:16,291 - Oh. So did you shave your legs? - Yeah. 104 00:06:16,501 --> 00:06:17,709 Uh-huh. 105 00:06:20,463 --> 00:06:23,507 Would you let it go, Ross? It was just a dream. 106 00:06:23,716 --> 00:06:24,800 It doesn't mean... 107 00:06:24,967 --> 00:06:26,009 [BEEPER BEEPING] 108 00:06:26,177 --> 00:06:29,721 Oh, oh, oh. Oh, this is it. Oh, my God. It's baby time. Baby time. 109 00:06:29,889 --> 00:06:33,266 All right, relax, relax, just relax, just relax. Be cool. 110 00:06:34,519 --> 00:06:36,812 Yeah, hi, I was just beeped. 111 00:06:38,147 --> 00:06:42,901 No, Andre is not here. Third time today. 112 00:06:43,069 --> 00:06:45,153 Yes, I am sure. 113 00:06:45,321 --> 00:06:49,324 Heh. No, sir, I do not perform those kind of services. 114 00:06:49,492 --> 00:06:53,078 Services? Oh, services. 115 00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:56,373 Yeah, you want 55-JUMBO. 116 00:06:58,543 --> 00:07:00,043 Yeah. 117 00:07:00,211 --> 00:07:01,753 That's right. 118 00:07:01,921 --> 00:07:05,006 That's right. "JUMBO" with a U, sir. 119 00:07:05,174 --> 00:07:06,758 Heh. No, you don't want me. 120 00:07:06,926 --> 00:07:10,387 Judging by his number, I'd be a huge disappointment. 121 00:07:10,555 --> 00:07:13,682 Yeah. Alrighty, bye-bye. 122 00:07:13,891 --> 00:07:15,350 [SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY] 123 00:07:16,686 --> 00:07:19,146 JOEY: Hey, hey. How was the first day? - Hey. Oh. 124 00:07:19,313 --> 00:07:22,858 Excellent. Everyone was so, so nice. 125 00:07:23,025 --> 00:07:25,527 See? It pays to know the man who wears my shoes. 126 00:07:26,737 --> 00:07:28,488 - Me. - Ah. 127 00:07:29,782 --> 00:07:32,284 - I didn't tell anybody that I knew you. - Why not? 128 00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:34,536 Well, because, you know. 129 00:07:35,163 --> 00:07:36,997 They don't like you. 130 00:07:40,793 --> 00:07:42,586 - What? - I thought you knew that. 131 00:07:42,795 --> 00:07:44,087 Nah-uh. 132 00:07:45,506 --> 00:07:48,675 - Who doesn't like me? - Everyone. 133 00:07:48,843 --> 00:07:50,552 Except for, um... 134 00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:52,721 No. Everyone. 135 00:07:55,099 --> 00:07:58,101 - What are you talking about? - Don't feel bad. 136 00:07:58,269 --> 00:08:00,729 You know, they used to like you a lot. 137 00:08:00,897 --> 00:08:04,483 But then you got promoted, and now you're all, like, Mr. Boss-Man. 138 00:08:04,650 --> 00:08:07,277 You know, Mr. Bing. Mr. Bing. Boss-Man Bing. 139 00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:09,446 [BOTH CHUCKLE] 140 00:08:10,114 --> 00:08:13,575 - I can't believe it. - Yeah, yeah. They even do you. 141 00:08:15,203 --> 00:08:17,120 - They do me? - Yeah. 142 00:08:17,288 --> 00:08:19,581 You know, like, um, okay: 143 00:08:19,749 --> 00:08:21,374 "Could that report be any later?" 144 00:08:21,542 --> 00:08:23,543 [JOEY & ROSS LAUGHING] 145 00:08:27,798 --> 00:08:28,924 I don't sound like that. 146 00:08:29,175 --> 00:08:32,260 - Oh, oh. Chandler. - Oh. Yeah, you do. 147 00:08:32,428 --> 00:08:35,555 "The hills are alive with the sound... 148 00:08:35,723 --> 00:08:37,599 ...of music." 149 00:08:43,022 --> 00:08:44,064 "My scone!" 150 00:08:44,232 --> 00:08:45,857 ROSS, JOEY & PHOEBE: "My scone!" 151 00:08:46,025 --> 00:08:47,442 [ALL LAUGHING] 152 00:08:48,236 --> 00:08:50,612 Okay, I don't sound like that. That is so not true. 153 00:08:50,821 --> 00:08:52,280 [BOTH LAUGHING] 154 00:08:53,741 --> 00:08:56,493 That is so not... That is so not... That... 155 00:08:56,661 --> 00:08:58,119 Oh, shut up. 156 00:09:00,831 --> 00:09:02,457 Ha, ha. You did not. 157 00:09:02,625 --> 00:09:04,584 I am telling you, up until I was 9... 158 00:09:04,752 --> 00:09:07,587 ...I thought gunpoint was an actual place where crimes happened. 159 00:09:07,755 --> 00:09:11,424 - Ha, ha. How is that possible? - Think about it. It's always on the news. 160 00:09:11,592 --> 00:09:14,261 "A man is being held up at Gunpoint." 161 00:09:14,428 --> 00:09:16,805 "Tourists are being terrorized at Gunpoint." 162 00:09:17,014 --> 00:09:20,475 And I just kept thinking, "Why do people continue to go there?" 163 00:09:24,105 --> 00:09:25,897 Oh, ah. 164 00:09:26,065 --> 00:09:29,776 - I should go. - Okay. 165 00:09:35,157 --> 00:09:36,908 Okay. 166 00:09:37,076 --> 00:09:38,285 - Unless... - What? 167 00:09:39,245 --> 00:09:42,539 Uh, unless you wanna stay over. 168 00:09:42,707 --> 00:09:44,499 I mean, I'm going to. So... 169 00:09:44,709 --> 00:09:46,167 [BOTH CHUCKLE] 170 00:09:47,169 --> 00:09:49,337 Yeah, I'd really like that. 171 00:09:55,469 --> 00:10:01,016 Uh, before we get into any staying-over stuff... 172 00:10:01,183 --> 00:10:03,476 ...there's something you should know. 173 00:10:03,644 --> 00:10:06,146 Okay. Is this like "I have an early class tomorrow"... 174 00:10:06,314 --> 00:10:09,899 ...or "I'm secretly married to a goat"? 175 00:10:10,109 --> 00:10:13,862 Well, it's somewhere in between. 176 00:10:14,071 --> 00:10:18,325 You see, in a strictly technical sense, of course, I'm not, uh... 177 00:10:18,492 --> 00:10:21,453 Well, I mean, I haven't ever, um... 178 00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:23,413 - Ethan? - Yeah? 179 00:10:23,581 --> 00:10:24,873 Are you a virgin? 180 00:10:25,082 --> 00:10:28,835 Well, if that's what you kids are calling it these days... 181 00:10:29,003 --> 00:10:30,629 ...then yes, I am. 182 00:10:33,549 --> 00:10:37,052 I, uh... I've kind of been waiting for the right person. 183 00:10:38,888 --> 00:10:41,222 - Really? - Yeah. 184 00:10:42,308 --> 00:10:44,934 You do know I was talking about you, right? 185 00:10:53,861 --> 00:10:55,278 Wow. 186 00:10:56,489 --> 00:10:57,906 You keep saying that. 187 00:10:58,491 --> 00:11:01,951 You know, you read about it. You see it in the movies. 188 00:11:02,119 --> 00:11:05,955 Even when you practice it at home, man, oh, man... 189 00:11:06,123 --> 00:11:08,917 ...it is nothing like that. 190 00:11:09,085 --> 00:11:10,126 Oh. 191 00:11:10,294 --> 00:11:11,836 [ETHAN MOANING] 192 00:11:12,046 --> 00:11:14,047 Listen, listen. 193 00:11:14,715 --> 00:11:19,552 Um, you told me something that was really difficult for you. 194 00:11:19,762 --> 00:11:23,932 And, um, well, I figure if you can be honest, then I can too. 195 00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:27,769 - Oh, God, don't tell me I did it wrong. - No. 196 00:11:27,937 --> 00:11:29,479 - No, no, no. - Oh. 197 00:11:29,647 --> 00:11:32,732 - Nothing wrong about that. - Oh. Ha, ha. 198 00:11:33,401 --> 00:11:37,070 Um, okay. Here goes. 199 00:11:38,155 --> 00:11:40,407 I'm not 22. 200 00:11:40,574 --> 00:11:43,243 I'm 25. 201 00:11:44,245 --> 00:11:45,662 And 13 months. 202 00:11:47,581 --> 00:11:48,790 Huh. 203 00:11:48,958 --> 00:11:51,126 But I figure, you know, that shouldn't change anything. 204 00:11:51,293 --> 00:11:54,796 I mean, what the hell does it matter how old we are? 205 00:11:57,466 --> 00:11:59,134 Listen, um... 206 00:11:59,301 --> 00:12:01,469 ...as long as we're telling stuff, uh... 207 00:12:03,472 --> 00:12:05,974 ...I have another one for you. 208 00:12:06,892 --> 00:12:08,852 I'm a little younger than I said. 209 00:12:10,896 --> 00:12:12,605 You're not a senior? 210 00:12:12,773 --> 00:12:15,024 Oh, I'm a senior. 211 00:12:18,404 --> 00:12:19,696 In high school. 212 00:12:25,953 --> 00:12:28,830 Okay. 213 00:12:32,084 --> 00:12:34,043 What we did was wrong. 214 00:12:34,211 --> 00:12:38,965 Oh, God. I just had sex with someone who wasn't alive during the bicentennial. 215 00:12:40,718 --> 00:12:43,094 I just had sex. 216 00:12:45,181 --> 00:12:48,516 Ethan, focus. How could you not tell me? 217 00:12:48,684 --> 00:12:51,352 - You never told me how old you were. - That's different. 218 00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:54,856 My lie didn't make one of us a felon in 48 states. 219 00:12:56,442 --> 00:12:59,527 - What were you thinking? - I wasn't thinking. I was busy falling... 220 00:12:59,695 --> 00:13:01,780 - Don't say it. ...in love with you. 221 00:13:03,365 --> 00:13:04,783 Really? 222 00:13:04,950 --> 00:13:06,951 Sorry. 223 00:13:07,745 --> 00:13:09,162 Well, fall out of it. 224 00:13:09,330 --> 00:13:12,749 You know, you shouldn't even be here. It's a school night. 225 00:13:14,752 --> 00:13:16,669 Oh, God. Oh, God. 226 00:13:16,837 --> 00:13:22,091 I'm like those women that you see with shiny guys named Chad. 227 00:13:24,845 --> 00:13:27,055 I'm Joan Collins. 228 00:13:29,934 --> 00:13:31,518 Who? 229 00:13:39,735 --> 00:13:43,321 Okay, Andre should be there in about 45 minutes. 230 00:13:44,365 --> 00:13:46,699 Alrighty. Bye-bye. 231 00:13:47,910 --> 00:13:50,620 Ahem. It's just easier that way. 232 00:13:52,206 --> 00:13:54,791 Oh, come on. You told me about the last dream. 233 00:13:54,959 --> 00:13:56,751 No. Forget it. 234 00:13:56,919 --> 00:14:00,755 Well, why not? Was I doing something particularly saucy? 235 00:14:02,967 --> 00:14:06,135 All right, fine. Um... 236 00:14:06,303 --> 00:14:08,263 Well, you were not the only one there. 237 00:14:09,932 --> 00:14:11,891 Joey was there too. 238 00:14:13,561 --> 00:14:14,936 All right. 239 00:14:16,313 --> 00:14:18,565 Was there, uh, heh... 240 00:14:21,569 --> 00:14:23,903 ...anybody else there? 241 00:14:24,071 --> 00:14:26,155 - No. - You sure? 242 00:14:26,323 --> 00:14:30,618 Nobody, uh, handing out mints or anything? 243 00:14:32,371 --> 00:14:33,955 No, it was just the three of us. 244 00:14:34,665 --> 00:14:35,748 Oh. 245 00:14:36,667 --> 00:14:39,836 So tell me, was it like you and Chandler and then you and me... 246 00:14:40,004 --> 00:14:41,379 ...or you and me and Chandler? 247 00:14:42,423 --> 00:14:43,673 [CHUCKLES] 248 00:14:43,841 --> 00:14:46,467 - You know what? - What? 249 00:14:46,635 --> 00:14:48,636 There were times... 250 00:14:48,804 --> 00:14:51,055 ...when it wasn't even me. 251 00:14:52,141 --> 00:14:54,142 [BOTH CHUCKLING] 252 00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:04,485 That is so sweet, you guys. 253 00:15:08,115 --> 00:15:09,699 ROSS: Hey, Mon. RACHEL: Mon. 254 00:15:09,867 --> 00:15:11,326 Mon, Ethan called again. 255 00:15:14,496 --> 00:15:16,122 Mon? 256 00:15:16,290 --> 00:15:18,041 ALL: Mon! 257 00:15:19,293 --> 00:15:21,336 - What? - Ethan called again. 258 00:15:21,545 --> 00:15:22,670 Oh. 259 00:15:22,838 --> 00:15:25,924 - You're not seeing him anymore? - No. 260 00:15:26,091 --> 00:15:28,468 You know, sometimes just things don't work out. 261 00:15:28,636 --> 00:15:32,847 And this has nothing to do with the fact that he needs a note to get out of gym? 262 00:15:36,977 --> 00:15:40,104 I didn't say any... I did not say anything, I swear. 263 00:15:40,272 --> 00:15:41,606 He stopped by. 264 00:15:41,774 --> 00:15:43,191 JOEY: Next time you talk to him... 265 00:15:43,359 --> 00:15:47,362 ...could you ask him which one the strongest Power Ranger is? 266 00:15:47,571 --> 00:15:49,364 [MONICA LAUGHING] 267 00:15:49,531 --> 00:15:53,326 Oh, my life is just so amusing. Heh, heh. Can we drop it now? 268 00:15:53,494 --> 00:15:54,744 Sorry. Sorry. 269 00:15:55,371 --> 00:15:56,871 It's morphing time. 270 00:15:57,039 --> 00:15:58,581 - Stegosaurus! - Tyrannosaurus! 271 00:15:58,791 --> 00:16:00,792 [GUYS YELLING] 272 00:16:03,796 --> 00:16:05,338 Ooh. Oh, I gotta go. 273 00:16:05,506 --> 00:16:07,715 Whoa. Ooh, head rush. Oh. 274 00:16:09,551 --> 00:16:12,178 One more and then I have to go. 275 00:16:12,346 --> 00:16:13,554 Cool. Ha, ha. 276 00:16:17,226 --> 00:16:19,018 Where you going? 277 00:16:19,186 --> 00:16:21,729 Oh, I got a birthday party with some work people. 278 00:16:21,897 --> 00:16:23,606 Work people? 279 00:16:24,525 --> 00:16:26,442 - Nobody told me. - No, I know. 280 00:16:26,610 --> 00:16:30,697 That's part of the whole, you know, them-not-liking-you extravaganza. 281 00:16:32,825 --> 00:16:36,119 Know what? I don't get this. A month ago, these people were my friends. 282 00:16:36,286 --> 00:16:39,247 Just because I'm in charge, doesn't mean I'm a different person. 283 00:16:39,415 --> 00:16:42,250 Well, then you should come tonight, just hang out with them. 284 00:16:42,418 --> 00:16:44,419 Let them see what a great guy you still are. 285 00:16:44,586 --> 00:16:46,671 - You think I should? - I really do, yeah. 286 00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:48,715 - Okay. Okay. PHOEBE: Okay. 287 00:16:48,882 --> 00:16:50,466 Oh, but, um, could we not go together? 288 00:16:52,177 --> 00:16:55,596 I don't wanna be the geek who invited the boss, you know? 289 00:16:58,892 --> 00:17:00,393 CHANDLER: I think last night was great. 290 00:17:00,561 --> 00:17:03,104 You know, the karaoke thing? Tracy and I doing "Ebony and lvory"? 291 00:17:03,272 --> 00:17:04,355 - Mm-hm. - Ha, ha. 292 00:17:04,523 --> 00:17:07,316 You were great. But they still made fun of you. 293 00:17:07,985 --> 00:17:10,862 - What? - Now you're more like Mr. Caring-Boss. 294 00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:12,530 Mr. "I'm-One-of-You"-Boss. 295 00:17:12,698 --> 00:17:15,533 Mr. "I-Wanna-Be-Your-Buddy"- Boss-Man-Bing. 296 00:17:16,869 --> 00:17:18,703 Then I don't get it. 297 00:17:19,413 --> 00:17:23,207 Well, you know what, Chandler? I think you just gotta face it. 298 00:17:23,375 --> 00:17:25,835 You're, like, the guy in the big office, you know? 299 00:17:26,045 --> 00:17:28,963 You're the one that hires them and fires them. 300 00:17:29,131 --> 00:17:31,841 - They still say you're a great boss. - They do? 301 00:17:32,009 --> 00:17:33,092 Uh-huh. 302 00:17:33,260 --> 00:17:35,511 But they're not your friends anymore. 303 00:17:35,679 --> 00:17:37,555 - But I just want to... - No, but you can't. 304 00:17:38,640 --> 00:17:39,891 - But I just want... - Ah-ah. 305 00:17:46,899 --> 00:17:48,524 [BEEPER BEEPING] 306 00:17:50,736 --> 00:17:51,778 Aren't you gonna...? 307 00:17:51,945 --> 00:17:53,529 Oh, Carol and I have a new system. 308 00:17:53,697 --> 00:17:57,450 If she punches in "911," it means she's having a baby. 309 00:17:57,618 --> 00:18:00,870 - Otherwise, I just ignore it. - What about Andre? 310 00:18:01,038 --> 00:18:04,123 This morning he got a call from what I think was our cousin Nathan. 311 00:18:04,291 --> 00:18:07,043 And frankly, it was a little more than I needed to know. 312 00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:15,134 Hey. 313 00:18:15,761 --> 00:18:17,220 That was gonna be my opener. 314 00:18:18,472 --> 00:18:22,475 Hey, did you guys check out those new hand dryers in the bathroom? 315 00:18:22,643 --> 00:18:25,394 - I thought that was just a rumor. RACHEL: True story. 316 00:18:29,233 --> 00:18:31,359 All right, look, I gotta tell you something. 317 00:18:31,527 --> 00:18:32,610 I'm not 17. 318 00:18:32,778 --> 00:18:35,446 I only said that so you'd think I was cute and vulnerable. 319 00:18:35,614 --> 00:18:36,864 I'm actually 30. 320 00:18:37,032 --> 00:18:40,451 I have a wife. I have a job. I'm your congressman. 321 00:18:41,411 --> 00:18:44,038 Monica, this is ridiculous. We are great together. 322 00:18:44,206 --> 00:18:47,792 We can talk, we make each other laugh. And the sex. Oh, man. 323 00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:51,295 Okay, I have no frame of reference, but I thought that was great. 324 00:18:52,422 --> 00:18:54,340 - It was. - Then what's the problem? 325 00:18:57,010 --> 00:18:59,011 Ethan, it's, um... 326 00:19:00,973 --> 00:19:02,056 It's icky. 327 00:19:03,225 --> 00:19:04,725 Icky? 328 00:19:04,893 --> 00:19:08,479 You're actually gonna throw this away because it's icky? 329 00:19:09,648 --> 00:19:11,816 Look, this isn't easy for me either. 330 00:19:11,984 --> 00:19:13,568 I wish things were different. 331 00:19:13,735 --> 00:19:16,571 If you were a few years older or I was a few years younger... 332 00:19:16,738 --> 00:19:19,323 ...or we lived in biblical times... 333 00:19:20,450 --> 00:19:22,869 ...I could really... - No, don't say it. 334 00:19:23,036 --> 00:19:24,245 - Love you. 335 00:19:29,042 --> 00:19:30,960 - Are your hands still wet? - They're moist. 336 00:19:31,128 --> 00:19:33,254 - Yeah, right? Ahem. - Let's dry them again. 337 00:19:38,969 --> 00:19:42,722 Or, like, "Could these margaritas be any stronger?" 338 00:19:44,850 --> 00:19:47,643 - Hey, Chandler. - Hello, Mr. Bing. 339 00:19:47,811 --> 00:19:50,271 Loved your Stevie Wonder last night. 340 00:19:51,899 --> 00:19:55,359 Thanks. Listen, about the weekly numbers, I'm gonna need them on my desk... 341 00:19:55,527 --> 00:19:57,153 ...by 9:00. 342 00:19:57,321 --> 00:19:59,989 SANTOS: Sure. - No problem. 343 00:20:02,492 --> 00:20:04,410 You have to give them something, you know? 344 00:20:04,578 --> 00:20:07,830 Okay, that was Gerston, Santos, and who's the guy with the mustache? 345 00:20:07,998 --> 00:20:09,999 - Petrie. - Petrie. Right, right, okay. 346 00:20:10,167 --> 00:20:12,877 Well, some people are gonna be working... 347 00:20:13,045 --> 00:20:14,086 ...this weekend. 348 00:20:20,677 --> 00:20:22,220 [MUSIC PLAYING ON TV] 349 00:20:39,196 --> 00:20:41,197 [MOANING] 350 00:20:44,576 --> 00:20:46,160 RACHEL: Oh, that's nice. 351 00:20:48,288 --> 00:20:50,289 [MOANING] 352 00:20:51,875 --> 00:20:53,876 Ross. 353 00:21:02,552 --> 00:21:05,304 - Ross? - I'm here. 354 00:21:07,224 --> 00:21:08,724 You are? 355 00:21:11,478 --> 00:21:12,895 Uh... Ahem. 356 00:21:13,063 --> 00:21:16,399 [STAMMERS] We were just... 357 00:21:16,566 --> 00:21:18,025 - Wow. - What? 358 00:21:18,193 --> 00:21:20,194 [BEEPER BEEPING] 359 00:21:21,029 --> 00:21:23,614 Heh. Great. Now I'm having a baby. 360 00:21:24,574 --> 00:21:26,325 - What? - Oh! 361 00:21:26,493 --> 00:21:28,411 - No. I'm having... I'm having a baby! - Oh. Oh! 362 00:21:28,578 --> 00:21:29,912 - Oh, my God. - I'm having a...! 363 00:21:30,080 --> 00:21:32,957 - The phone, the phone! - The phone. I don't have the phone. Aah! 364 00:21:35,877 --> 00:21:38,796 - Ross? - I'm hurt. 365 00:21:43,302 --> 00:21:46,178 Monica, let's go. Come on, now, people. Woman in labor. 366 00:21:46,346 --> 00:21:50,099 - Hey, Ross, look what I got going here. - Yeah, save it for the cab, okay? 367 00:21:50,726 --> 00:21:53,185 What are you doing? We're going to a hospital. 368 00:21:53,353 --> 00:21:56,564 What, so I can't look nice? There might be doctors there. 369 00:21:56,732 --> 00:22:00,109 - Joey, get out of the fridge. JOEY: All right, all right. 370 00:22:00,694 --> 00:22:02,695 - What is that? - For the ride. 371 00:22:02,863 --> 00:22:04,530 - Yeah, like in a cab you... - Save it. 372 00:22:04,698 --> 00:22:07,992 - Okay, hating this. - Monica, come on, now. Let's go. 373 00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:09,201 Baby coming. God. 374 00:22:09,369 --> 00:22:11,495 [CRYING] I can't believe it. I'm gonna be an aunt. 375 00:22:11,663 --> 00:22:13,581 - Oh, that's... - I'm gonna have a nephew. 376 00:22:13,749 --> 00:22:15,458 Oh, that's nice. Get out. 377 00:22:15,625 --> 00:22:17,710 - Come on. - Let's go, come on. 378 00:22:17,878 --> 00:22:18,919 RACHEL: Okay. Okay. 379 00:22:19,087 --> 00:22:21,339 JOEY: All right, all right, I'm going, I'm going. 380 00:22:28,472 --> 00:22:30,723 - Here we go. Here we go. - Rossy. Rossy. 381 00:22:30,932 --> 00:22:32,933 [ALL CHATTERING] 382 00:22:38,190 --> 00:22:40,191 [English - US - SDH]