1
00:00:08,675 --> 00:00:11,427
- Hey. What's up?
- I left my guitar here again.

2
00:00:11,594 --> 00:00:14,013
Oh, okay. No problem.

3
00:00:16,558 --> 00:00:19,351
- Okay. Here you go.
- Okay.

4
00:00:19,519 --> 00:00:20,978
Okay, um...

5
00:00:24,107 --> 00:00:27,151
- What?
- You want to hang out or something?

6
00:00:27,777 --> 00:00:30,195
Phoebe, you caught me at a bad time.

7
00:00:30,363 --> 00:00:32,406
- Oh, are you and Chandler...?
- Yes. Exactly.

8
00:00:32,574 --> 00:00:35,117
- Okay. Want me to play for you?
- No.

9
00:00:39,205 --> 00:00:40,873
Hey, Pheebs, what's up?

10
00:00:43,626 --> 00:00:47,588
You ask an intriguing question,
Chandler Bing.

11
00:00:49,841 --> 00:00:50,883
[GASPS]

12
00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:56,680
Oh, my God! You're getting a massage?
You never let me massage you.

13
00:00:56,890 --> 00:01:00,934
- Phoebe, I can explain.
- You told me you hate massages.

14
00:01:01,144 --> 00:01:05,439
Buy stamps. Pick up dry cleaning.
Don't let Phoebe in.

15
00:01:07,025 --> 00:01:09,651
I can't believe this.
How long has this been going on?

16
00:01:09,819 --> 00:01:13,530
- Well, uh, Alexandra has...
- Oh, it has a name?

17
00:01:15,241 --> 00:01:16,992
Phoebe, don't get upset.

18
00:01:17,160 --> 00:01:22,414
Okay. Oh, too late! I'm leaving.
Come on, Chandler, let's go.

19
00:01:23,792 --> 00:01:25,584
Well, I thought I'd...

20
00:01:25,752 --> 00:01:27,586
Yeah, what the hell.

21
00:02:08,503 --> 00:02:10,379
- Okay, come on. One more push.
- Unh!

22
00:02:10,547 --> 00:02:12,297
Come on, we're almost there.

23
00:02:12,465 --> 00:02:16,718
Joey, I'm so happy things worked out
for us and we're having this baby together.

24
00:02:16,886 --> 00:02:19,596
- I love you so much.
- Oh, I love you too.

25
00:02:19,764 --> 00:02:23,058
Mm. I hope it's not
an inappropriate time to say this...

26
00:02:23,226 --> 00:02:25,686
...but you're the best sex I've ever had.

27
00:02:27,063 --> 00:02:29,857
- That's always appropriate.
- Ha, ha.

28
00:02:30,024 --> 00:02:32,776
Okay, come on, one more push.
One more push.

29
00:02:32,944 --> 00:02:35,070
[GROANS]

30
00:02:35,738 --> 00:02:36,780
DOCTOR:
There we go.

31
00:02:36,948 --> 00:02:38,365
[RACHEL SIGHS AND BABY CRIES]

32
00:02:38,533 --> 00:02:44,788
Here is your beautiful baby.
Congratulations.

33
00:02:51,171 --> 00:02:52,337
[SNARLS]

34
00:02:52,505 --> 00:02:55,174
I hope you're a better father
than you are a friend!

35
00:02:55,341 --> 00:02:57,801
[BOTH SCREAMING]

36
00:02:57,969 --> 00:02:59,928
Whoa! Aah, whoa.

37
00:03:00,096 --> 00:03:01,305
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

38
00:03:01,472 --> 00:03:03,056
- Joey!
- What, what?

39
00:03:03,224 --> 00:03:06,727
- What's going on? Uh...
- Feel this. Come feel my belly.

40
00:03:06,895 --> 00:03:09,897
The baby's kicking for the first time.
Please come feel.

41
00:03:10,064 --> 00:03:11,982
- Really? Uh...
- Yes.

42
00:03:12,150 --> 00:03:14,902
You know what? Maybe, uh, you...

43
00:03:15,069 --> 00:03:16,820
Maybe you should come to me.

44
00:03:16,988 --> 00:03:20,240
- I'm not wearing any bottoms.
- Oh, okay.

45
00:03:22,744 --> 00:03:24,745
- Oh, my God.
- Aah!

46
00:03:24,913 --> 00:03:26,705
It's unbelievable!

47
00:03:26,873 --> 00:03:30,584
Wow, she is kicking so much.
She's like, um...

48
00:03:30,752 --> 00:03:33,795
Who's that kind of
annoying girl soccer player?

49
00:03:33,963 --> 00:03:36,924
- Mia Hamm?
- Mia Hamm!

50
00:03:37,675 --> 00:03:40,594
- Oh! It's amazing.
- Whoa. One hand on the sheet, Joe.

51
00:03:40,762 --> 00:03:43,805
Whoa, eh. Sorry.

52
00:03:48,853 --> 00:03:50,103
- Hey, babe.
MONICA: Hey, honey.

53
00:03:50,271 --> 00:03:55,442
We got a wedding gift from Bob and
Faye Bing. They don't like us, do they?

54
00:03:56,110 --> 00:04:00,113
Who says you can't get
a nice punch bowl for under $6?

55
00:04:00,323 --> 00:04:02,950
- Maybe we can take it back.
- Doesn't say where it's from.

56
00:04:03,117 --> 00:04:06,536
- Where would we return it?
- How about to the street, from the balcony?

57
00:04:07,956 --> 00:04:09,748
Why don't we just find a place for it?

58
00:04:09,916 --> 00:04:11,541
[MUMBLES]

59
00:04:13,503 --> 00:04:15,212
How about in that cabinet?

60
00:04:15,380 --> 00:04:16,964
That's where we keep canned goods.

61
00:04:17,131 --> 00:04:20,217
Have you forgotten everything
you learned in orientation?

62
00:04:23,096 --> 00:04:25,055
How about the closet by the bathroom?

63
00:04:25,223 --> 00:04:27,266
Oh. Okay.
Why don't you let me do it.

64
00:04:27,433 --> 00:04:29,184
No, no, no. I will do it.

65
00:04:29,352 --> 00:04:34,564
You have to relax and let your husband
take care of things once in a while.

66
00:04:34,732 --> 00:04:37,317
It's locked. You have to help me.

67
00:04:37,485 --> 00:04:39,027
Why is it locked?

68
00:04:39,487 --> 00:04:42,656
No reason.
I keep private things in there.

69
00:04:42,824 --> 00:04:44,783
You know, I've been living here a while...

70
00:04:44,951 --> 00:04:47,077
...and I've never seen
what's in that closet.

71
00:04:47,245 --> 00:04:49,246
What is in there?

72
00:04:49,998 --> 00:04:51,290
Feminine stuff.

73
00:04:51,499 --> 00:04:54,960
Don't try to make me uncomfortable
with feminine stuff!

74
00:04:55,169 --> 00:05:00,424
Nothing in there concerns you.
If you love me, you'll just let it go.

75
00:05:02,802 --> 00:05:05,762
- Fine.
- Thank you.

76
00:05:10,727 --> 00:05:12,853
Love you.

77
00:05:14,397 --> 00:05:18,608
Hello, Chandler.
Lovely day, huh? You.

78
00:05:20,695 --> 00:05:24,906
If it helps, Alexandra's only been
massaging Monica for, like, three years.

79
00:05:27,618 --> 00:05:30,996
If! I said, if it helps.

80
00:05:32,999 --> 00:05:35,042
Why won't you let me massage you?

81
00:05:35,209 --> 00:05:38,962
Uh, well, it's... I'd be self-conscious.

82
00:05:39,130 --> 00:05:41,131
You're my friend. I'd be naked.

83
00:05:41,299 --> 00:05:45,177
We lived together for years.
I've seen you naked.

84
00:05:45,345 --> 00:05:48,805
That's different. We were roommates.
And when?

85
00:05:50,850 --> 00:05:53,643
I'm curious about the human body.

86
00:05:54,854 --> 00:05:57,856
You can understand
why this would be weird for me.

87
00:05:58,024 --> 00:06:00,817
I'm a professional
and I'm really good.

88
00:06:00,985 --> 00:06:05,697
If you're uncomfortable, we can stop.
Just give me a chance, okay? Please?

89
00:06:06,324 --> 00:06:08,533
Okay, if it means that much to you.

90
00:06:08,701 --> 00:06:12,162
It does. How would you feel
if you couldn't share your cooking?

91
00:06:12,330 --> 00:06:16,333
Or imagine how Ross would feel
if he couldn't teach us about dragons.

92
00:06:18,419 --> 00:06:21,546
- Dinosaurs.
- Potato, "potato."

93
00:06:25,468 --> 00:06:27,719
- Hey.
- Ross, the baby's kicking.

94
00:06:27,887 --> 00:06:30,013
What? It is?

95
00:06:35,311 --> 00:06:37,270
It's not kicking right now.

96
00:06:37,438 --> 00:06:40,982
Although we would love
to see you do that again.

97
00:06:42,193 --> 00:06:44,111
When was it kicking? What happened?

98
00:06:44,278 --> 00:06:48,073
Last night. I felt it. I went into Joey's room,
and he was sleeping.

99
00:06:48,241 --> 00:06:50,867
A dreamless sleep.

100
00:06:51,577 --> 00:06:55,288
My God, the baby's kicking.
That's great.

101
00:06:55,540 --> 00:07:01,128
I wish I would have been there to feel
the kicking for the first time.

102
00:07:01,337 --> 00:07:05,090
I got some stuff going on
in here if you want to feel.

103
00:07:05,299 --> 00:07:10,262
I don't want to miss any more baby
stuff. Here's my pager number.

104
00:07:10,471 --> 00:07:14,015
Anytime anything pregnancy-related
happens, use it. I'll be there.

105
00:07:14,183 --> 00:07:17,436
I don't care if it's 3 in the morning
and you want ice cream.

106
00:07:17,603 --> 00:07:19,104
Wow. Can I get a copy of that?

107
00:07:24,193 --> 00:07:26,945
PHOEBE: Are you under the sheet?
MONICA: Yes.

108
00:07:27,113 --> 00:07:29,239
[RELAXING MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO]

109
00:07:29,407 --> 00:07:31,783
Great, let's begin.

110
00:07:39,750 --> 00:07:42,169
- How's the pressure?
- Ah.

111
00:07:43,045 --> 00:07:46,256
It's nice. Wow, Phoebe, you are good.

112
00:07:46,507 --> 00:07:49,301
Stating the obvious, but thank you.

113
00:07:49,552 --> 00:07:53,638
- And it's not weird, is it?
- No.

114
00:07:54,223 --> 00:07:55,557
[MONICA MOANS]

115
00:07:55,766 --> 00:07:58,852
That's right, you just enjoy.

116
00:07:59,061 --> 00:08:00,729
[MONICA MOANS]

117
00:08:00,938 --> 00:08:03,440
Oh, yeah!

118
00:08:03,649 --> 00:08:07,652
Oh, oh!

119
00:08:08,404 --> 00:08:12,824
- Oh, yeah!
- Okay.

120
00:08:13,534 --> 00:08:16,578
Oh, God, Phoebe!

121
00:08:16,829 --> 00:08:21,249
Oh, that's it! That's it, right there! Oh!

122
00:08:22,418 --> 00:08:27,172
[MONICA MOANS]

123
00:08:31,552 --> 00:08:32,802
[DOOR CLOSES]

124
00:08:33,012 --> 00:08:36,431
I wasn't trying to open your closet.
I wasn't trying, I swear.

125
00:08:37,475 --> 00:08:43,772
Wow. Monica runs a pretty tight ship here,
doesn't she? What are you doing?

126
00:08:43,940 --> 00:08:46,775
Monica has a secret closet.
She won't let me see what's in it.

127
00:08:46,943 --> 00:08:47,984
- Why not?
- I don't know!

128
00:08:48,152 --> 00:08:51,446
What could she possibly be hiding in here
what I can't see?

129
00:08:51,697 --> 00:08:53,865
I don't know. Ooh.

130
00:08:54,033 --> 00:08:56,535
I'll bet it's Richard.

131
00:08:57,662 --> 00:09:00,288
Why would Monica be keeping Richard
in here?

132
00:09:00,456 --> 00:09:02,749
Well, off the top of my head, uh...

133
00:09:02,917 --> 00:09:06,211
...maybe she's having her cake
and eating it too.

134
00:09:06,379 --> 00:09:10,006
You being the "cake,"
Richard being the "too."

135
00:09:10,174 --> 00:09:13,843
- Or...
- And here we go.

136
00:09:14,011 --> 00:09:16,054
I saw this movie once
where there was a door.

137
00:09:16,222 --> 00:09:17,722
Nobody knew what was behind it.

138
00:09:17,890 --> 00:09:23,520
And when they finally got it open, millions
and millions of bugs came pouring out...

139
00:09:23,729 --> 00:09:27,274
...and they feasted on human flesh!

140
00:09:28,192 --> 00:09:31,528
You know, it wouldn't kill you
to respect your wife's privacy!

141
00:09:36,033 --> 00:09:39,953
Stupid closet full of bugs!

142
00:09:41,038 --> 00:09:45,750
Joey, something feels weird
and not good weird. I don't... Whoa!

143
00:09:45,918 --> 00:09:48,753
Whoa! Don't worry.
When my sisters were pregnant...

144
00:09:48,921 --> 00:09:51,798
...they got every weird feeling
and it was always nothing.

145
00:09:51,966 --> 00:09:53,258
- Really?
JOEY: Absolutely.

146
00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:56,720
But we'll stop by the hospital
just to be sure. I'll page Ross.

147
00:09:56,887 --> 00:09:58,513
Okay, oh, God... Ow.

148
00:09:58,681 --> 00:10:01,641
Oh, okay, Rach, look at me.
Everything's gonna be fine.

149
00:10:01,809 --> 00:10:04,144
- Okay.
- Trust me. Take my hand. Here we go.

150
00:10:04,312 --> 00:10:07,105
Ow! Crushing bones!

151
00:10:07,315 --> 00:10:10,650
Good thing we're going to a hospital.

152
00:10:18,492 --> 00:10:20,619
- Hey. So?
- She's fine.

153
00:10:20,786 --> 00:10:22,954
She was experiencing
Braxton Hicks contractions.

154
00:10:23,122 --> 00:10:25,957
- Mild discomfort in the uterine wall.
- Hmm.

155
00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:31,171
Mild discomfort? I take it you've had
one of these Braxton thingies?

156
00:10:31,339 --> 00:10:32,964
- Everything is normal?
DOCTOR: Yes.

157
00:10:33,132 --> 00:10:35,550
- There's no danger to her or the baby?
DOCTOR: No.

158
00:10:35,718 --> 00:10:38,803
Contractions can be unnerving
if you don't know, but she's fine.

159
00:10:38,971 --> 00:10:43,975
Thank you, doctor.
And thank you for being nice and calm.

160
00:10:44,143 --> 00:10:48,188
Calm? I wasn't calm! I've never been
more scared in my life.

161
00:10:48,606 --> 00:10:53,401
- You said everything was okay.
- What do I know? I'm not a doctor.

162
00:10:54,278 --> 00:10:57,572
- But everything is okay. I'm fine.
- You sure?

163
00:10:57,782 --> 00:11:01,618
Yes. I got half a mind
to contract that doctor's uterus.

164
00:11:01,827 --> 00:11:04,829
Mild discomfort!
What's he talking about?

165
00:11:04,997 --> 00:11:06,831
- Is everything okay?
- Everything's fine.

166
00:11:07,041 --> 00:11:10,168
Your page said, "Come to
the hospital." What happened?

167
00:11:10,336 --> 00:11:12,754
Something called
Braxton Hicks contraction.

168
00:11:12,922 --> 00:11:15,215
Ugh, oh. Ha, ha.

169
00:11:15,383 --> 00:11:17,592
That's no big deal.
Most women don't feel them.

170
00:11:17,760 --> 00:11:19,969
Okay, no uterus, no opinion.

171
00:11:22,014 --> 00:11:23,723
Hey, uh, what's with the candy?

172
00:11:23,891 --> 00:11:27,227
When you beeped me I was at
the concession stand at the movies.

173
00:11:27,395 --> 00:11:31,231
- You went to the movies by yourself?
- No... Mona!

174
00:11:32,483 --> 00:11:35,318
- Oh, I gotta go back in there.
- Why? What's wrong?

175
00:11:35,486 --> 00:11:38,822
- Everything's fine, I just gotta...
- No, really, tell me. What's up?

176
00:11:40,116 --> 00:11:42,367
Look, I forgot my underwear.

177
00:11:46,372 --> 00:11:49,374
So thanks so much
for bringing her to the hospital.

178
00:11:49,542 --> 00:11:52,419
Oh, hey, don't worry about it.
No big deal.

179
00:11:52,586 --> 00:11:54,838
But still, it should have been me.
I'm the dad.

180
00:11:57,007 --> 00:11:58,299
If you have questions...

181
00:11:58,467 --> 00:12:00,802
...here's information on Braxton Hicks.
- Thanks.

182
00:12:00,970 --> 00:12:03,680
And by the way, you did the right thing
by bringing her in.

183
00:12:03,848 --> 00:12:07,517
- You're gonna make a wonderful father.
- Oh, uh...

184
00:12:08,102 --> 00:12:13,273
Hey, not as good as this guy.
He brought Twizzlers.

185
00:12:18,863 --> 00:12:23,032
- There has got to be a way.
- Easy there, Captain Kirk.

186
00:12:25,119 --> 00:12:27,537
- Oh, do you have a bobby pin?
- Yeah.

187
00:12:27,788 --> 00:12:31,833
Oh, no, wait.
I'm not a 9-year-old girl.

188
00:12:32,084 --> 00:12:34,252
Then why do you throw like one?

189
00:12:35,212 --> 00:12:38,840
- Maybe Monica has a bobby pin.
- Oh, sure, "Monica."

190
00:12:40,426 --> 00:12:43,845
So how's the hideously
inappropriate crush on Rachel coming?

191
00:12:44,054 --> 00:12:48,516
Really good. I should be ready
to kill myself any day now.

192
00:12:48,726 --> 00:12:50,894
Well, you sure found that quick.

193
00:12:55,149 --> 00:12:57,984
I just wish I didn't feel this way
about Rachel.

194
00:12:58,152 --> 00:13:00,153
I wish things could go back to normal.

195
00:13:00,321 --> 00:13:05,575
I mean, I love living with her,
and helping out with the baby is amazing.

196
00:13:05,743 --> 00:13:08,870
But now I think Ross feels left out.

197
00:13:09,038 --> 00:13:11,748
You know?
When I had to take Rachel to the hospital...

198
00:13:11,916 --> 00:13:14,501
...the doctor thought I was the father.
God, you...

199
00:13:14,668 --> 00:13:17,253
You should have seen
the look on Ross' face.

200
00:13:18,172 --> 00:13:20,340
By the way,
I have no idea what I'm doing here.

201
00:13:20,508 --> 00:13:22,300
For all I know, I'm locking it more.

202
00:13:23,511 --> 00:13:25,553
Hey, you try opening it with a credit card?

203
00:13:25,721 --> 00:13:27,847
- That's a good idea. Okay.
- Yeah.

204
00:13:28,015 --> 00:13:31,601
- So, uh, Ross is kind of bummed, huh?
- Ugh.

205
00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:34,646
- I ju... I feel terrible.
- It's not your fault.

206
00:13:34,814 --> 00:13:37,190
What are you gonna do,
not take her to the hospital?

207
00:13:37,358 --> 00:13:38,733
You're doing nothing wrong.

208
00:13:38,901 --> 00:13:42,862
Except for harboring an all-consuming
love for the woman carrying his baby.

209
00:13:48,410 --> 00:13:53,122
Richard, if you're in there,
could you pass me my credit card?

210
00:13:55,459 --> 00:13:56,709
- Hey.
- Hey.

211
00:13:56,877 --> 00:14:01,506
I gotta tell you, yesterday was amazing.
That massage felt so good.

212
00:14:01,674 --> 00:14:04,050
No, no, I got that.

213
00:14:04,218 --> 00:14:06,636
So, um, what do you say
we make it a weekly appointment?

214
00:14:06,804 --> 00:14:07,846
Okay.

215
00:14:08,013 --> 00:14:13,268
You should know though,
I've, um, raised my rates to $200 an hour.

216
00:14:13,936 --> 00:14:16,354
- Okay.
- I mean 500.

217
00:14:16,897 --> 00:14:19,399
- What?
- 600.

218
00:14:19,567 --> 00:14:20,608
What's going on?

219
00:14:20,776 --> 00:14:23,653
Oh, you make sex noises
when you get massaged.

220
00:14:23,821 --> 00:14:25,947
- Wha...?
- And it really freaked me out.

221
00:14:26,115 --> 00:14:29,659
After a while, I even tried to hurt you
and it just spurred you on.

222
00:14:30,369 --> 00:14:34,414
What? You're crazy. There's nothing sexual
about the noises I make.

223
00:14:34,582 --> 00:14:36,207
Really? There's nothing sexual
about this?

224
00:14:36,375 --> 00:14:37,584
[MOANS]

225
00:14:37,751 --> 00:14:42,922
Oh, God! Oh, oh, oh!

226
00:14:43,090 --> 00:14:44,507
What are you looking at?

227
00:14:46,802 --> 00:14:48,011
I mean, hi.

228
00:14:49,763 --> 00:14:53,474
This is so embarrassing.
I'm never gonna get massaged again.

229
00:14:53,642 --> 00:14:56,644
No, you can't let this stop you
from getting massages.

230
00:14:56,854 --> 00:15:00,440
Look, I have lots of clients
that make the same noises you do.

231
00:15:00,608 --> 00:15:03,234
- Really?
- Well, not clients. Lovers.

232
00:15:05,529 --> 00:15:09,782
Let's just... We'll try it again. Come back,
and we'll work through it.

233
00:15:09,950 --> 00:15:12,785
- You sure?
- Yes.

234
00:15:12,995 --> 00:15:17,332
- I guess.
- Great! Now, if you'll just excuse me.

235
00:15:17,499 --> 00:15:20,001
So did you hear something you liked?

236
00:15:24,757 --> 00:15:29,344
Hey, Ross, check it out!
I learned a new trick. Huh?

237
00:15:29,553 --> 00:15:32,639
- Hey, uh, I brought you some lunch.
- Oh!

238
00:15:32,806 --> 00:15:37,018
- That's so sweet of you. Oh, yum.
- Eh.

239
00:15:37,186 --> 00:15:39,437
Mm, mm.

240
00:15:41,023 --> 00:15:44,233
- Did you put pickles on this?
- Well, yeah.

241
00:15:44,401 --> 00:15:45,443
[GROANING]

242
00:15:45,611 --> 00:15:48,571
What? What? Rach, what?

243
00:15:48,739 --> 00:15:51,783
- What's going on?
- I made her favorite, tuna with pickle.

244
00:15:51,951 --> 00:15:54,452
Pickle? Pickle makes her sick.

245
00:15:54,620 --> 00:15:57,538
Giving her pickle is
like giving me salad.

246
00:15:59,375 --> 00:16:02,085
I'm sorry, I didn't know.
You gonna be okay?

247
00:16:02,252 --> 00:16:03,294
RACHEL:
I'll be fine.

248
00:16:03,462 --> 00:16:06,172
But someone make sure
that sandwich is gone when I get out.

249
00:16:06,340 --> 00:16:08,716
I'm on it!

250
00:16:10,219 --> 00:16:13,680
I can't believe this. I shouldn't be the one
making her throw up.

251
00:16:13,847 --> 00:16:18,267
- Dude, relax. It could happen to anyone.
- Not to you. You know this stuff.

252
00:16:18,435 --> 00:16:21,187
I don't know any of it
and I'm the father.

253
00:16:21,397 --> 00:16:24,232
I just... I wish I could be
more involved, you know?

254
00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:28,319
Ugh.

255
00:16:29,196 --> 00:16:34,951
Well, if anyone is keeping score,
I no longer eat tuna.

256
00:16:35,828 --> 00:16:39,580
Hey, uh, can I talk to you guys
for a second?

257
00:16:39,748 --> 00:16:41,833
- Yeah.
- What's up?

258
00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:46,713
Well... Sit down.
I wanna talk about our situation.

259
00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:49,674
Are you breaking up with us?

260
00:16:51,176 --> 00:16:52,844
The thing is...

261
00:16:55,681 --> 00:16:58,933
...because I live with Rachel,
I'm here for a lot of the stuff.

262
00:16:59,101 --> 00:17:00,685
Okay, and Ross...

263
00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:05,314
Ross is missing everything. So...

264
00:17:05,524 --> 00:17:06,983
Yeah?

265
00:17:08,193 --> 00:17:10,903
Maybe you two should live together.

266
00:17:11,071 --> 00:17:13,573
Are you asking me to move out?
Do you not want me here?

267
00:17:13,741 --> 00:17:18,745
No, I love living with you.
It just seems that...

268
00:17:18,996 --> 00:17:23,374
...if you're gonna have a roommate,
it may as well be the father.

269
00:17:23,542 --> 00:17:26,753
But, Joey, I don't think Ross wants me
to move in to his apartment...

270
00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:29,756
...and disrupt his life like that. I mean...

271
00:17:31,216 --> 00:17:33,593
Or he does.

272
00:17:33,761 --> 00:17:38,347
I would love to be around
for you and the baby.

273
00:17:38,557 --> 00:17:41,934
We can just try it,
like on a temporary basis.

274
00:17:42,144 --> 00:17:45,855
- But it's you and me.
- It wouldn't be anything romantic.

275
00:17:46,023 --> 00:17:50,234
And I'm dating Mona. Damn it, Mona!

276
00:17:51,070 --> 00:17:54,989
I was supposed to meet her
an hour ago. What is wrong with me?

277
00:17:55,949 --> 00:17:58,910
So, what do you think?

278
00:17:59,119 --> 00:18:02,080
- I don't know. Is it crazy?
- No. No, it's not...

279
00:18:02,247 --> 00:18:04,290
Joey, this is a smart idea.

280
00:18:04,708 --> 00:18:07,960
Well, I was due.

281
00:18:08,754 --> 00:18:10,713
- Okay, let's do it. I'll move in.
- Really?

282
00:18:10,923 --> 00:18:14,217
- Oh, Rach, that's great. That's great.
- Mm.

283
00:18:14,384 --> 00:18:16,844
[LAUGHING]

284
00:18:19,973 --> 00:18:21,766
[BANGING ON DOOR]

285
00:18:23,519 --> 00:18:24,644
[GRUNTS]

286
00:18:24,812 --> 00:18:28,189
Not too shabby.
I got this all off myself...

287
00:18:28,398 --> 00:18:31,109
...using my wife's tools.

288
00:18:37,825 --> 00:18:39,408
Oh, my God.

289
00:18:39,576 --> 00:18:40,827
[DOOR CLOSES]

290
00:18:40,994 --> 00:18:42,620
[GASPS]

291
00:18:42,788 --> 00:18:44,622
How did you get in there?

292
00:18:44,790 --> 00:18:46,582
[GIGGLING]

293
00:18:48,168 --> 00:18:49,961
You're messy.

294
00:18:50,379 --> 00:18:55,633
- No! You weren't supposed to see this!
- I married Fred Sanford.

295
00:18:55,801 --> 00:18:57,802
No, Chandler, you don't understand.

296
00:18:58,011 --> 00:19:02,181
[HUMMING "SANFORD AND SON"
THEME SONG]

297
00:19:02,349 --> 00:19:07,311
Okay, okay, fine! Now you know. Okay?
I'm sick.

298
00:19:07,479 --> 00:19:12,608
No, honey, you're not sick. I don't
love you because you're organized.

299
00:19:12,776 --> 00:19:14,944
I love you in spite of that.

300
00:19:16,238 --> 00:19:18,030
Really?

301
00:19:18,907 --> 00:19:21,868
- Promise you won't tell anyone?
- Yes.

302
00:19:22,077 --> 00:19:26,747
Now that I know, if I've got extra stuff
lying around, can we share the closet?

303
00:19:26,915 --> 00:19:31,210
Oh. Well, it's just, um...

304
00:19:31,378 --> 00:19:33,004
I'm afraid you might mess it up.

305
00:19:40,345 --> 00:19:41,804
- Hey.
- Hey.

306
00:19:41,972 --> 00:19:46,934
So Rachel's all moved out, huh?
How you taking it?

307
00:19:47,102 --> 00:19:49,187
Well, uh, I wanted to have a few beers...

308
00:19:49,354 --> 00:19:54,400
...but, uh, I got rid of those because
Rachel couldn't stand the smell of them.

309
00:19:54,568 --> 00:19:58,362
I have thrown back a lot
of orange juice with calcium though.

310
00:19:58,530 --> 00:20:04,327
And, uh, it's a couple weeks past its
expiration date, so it's got a bit of a kick.

311
00:20:06,997 --> 00:20:11,375
- Are you okay?
- You kidding me? Yeah, I'm great.

312
00:20:11,585 --> 00:20:14,879
I'm, uh... I'm better than great. I am good.

313
00:20:16,673 --> 00:20:19,508
Now that she's gone, I can, uh...

314
00:20:19,676 --> 00:20:23,095
I can do all the stuff around here
that I couldn't do before. You know?

315
00:20:23,305 --> 00:20:25,181
Like, um...

316
00:20:25,390 --> 00:20:27,391
I can walk around naked again.

317
00:20:27,559 --> 00:20:30,061
You know? I can, uh...

318
00:20:30,229 --> 00:20:33,731
I can watch porn in the living room.
Right?

319
00:20:34,399 --> 00:20:36,359
This is, uh... This is good for me.

320
00:20:36,610 --> 00:20:40,863
I like being on my own.
I'm better off this way.

321
00:20:41,031 --> 00:20:44,367
I'm a... I'm a lone wolf.

322
00:20:44,576 --> 00:20:48,537
A loner. Alone.

323
00:20:48,914 --> 00:20:53,542
All alone. Forever.

324
00:20:56,213 --> 00:21:00,091
What's a wolf gotta do
to get a hug around here?

325
00:21:06,598 --> 00:21:07,932
[MONICA MOANS]

326
00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:11,185
- That's it, just relax.
- Unh.

327
00:21:11,395 --> 00:21:13,062
Oh, oh!

328
00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:15,731
- Come on, more.
- Oh, God!

329
00:21:15,941 --> 00:21:18,526
You like that, don't you?

330
00:21:18,777 --> 00:21:23,281
- Yeah, right there.
- Want it there? Take it there, baby.

331
00:21:25,158 --> 00:21:29,120
- Phoebe?
- Yeah, say my name. Say it.

332
00:21:37,713 --> 00:21:41,007
And now I'm going
to cover you back up.

333
00:21:41,717 --> 00:21:47,263
And, um, I won't be speaking with you
for several weeks.

334
00:21:51,852 --> 00:21:53,853
[English - US - SDH]