1
00:00:02,168 --> 00:00:03,252
PHOEBE:
Oh, that's good.

2
00:00:03,420 --> 00:00:05,254
- Okay. All right, Phoebe?
- Okay, okay.

3
00:00:05,422 --> 00:00:09,883
If I were omnipotent for a day,
I would want, um, world peace...

4
00:00:10,093 --> 00:00:13,178
...no more hunger,
good things for the rain forest.

5
00:00:14,264 --> 00:00:15,556
And bigger boobs.

6
00:00:17,100 --> 00:00:19,852
Well, see, you took mine, so...

7
00:00:21,062 --> 00:00:22,438
Chandler, what about you?

8
00:00:22,605 --> 00:00:26,025
If I were omnipotent for a day,
I'd make myself omnipotent forever.

9
00:00:26,234 --> 00:00:28,527
Heh. See, there's always one guy.

10
00:00:28,695 --> 00:00:31,405
"If I had a wish,
I'd wish for three more wishes."

11
00:00:31,573 --> 00:00:32,948
[ALL CHUCKLE]

12
00:00:34,075 --> 00:00:35,534
ROSS & MONICA: Hey, Joey.
- Hey, buddy.

13
00:00:35,702 --> 00:00:37,828
What would you do
if you were omnipotent?

14
00:00:38,538 --> 00:00:40,831
Probably kill myself.

15
00:00:41,791 --> 00:00:43,250
Excuse me?

16
00:00:43,418 --> 00:00:47,087
Hey, if Little Joey's dead,
then I got no reason to live, you know?

17
00:00:49,090 --> 00:00:51,383
Joey, uh, omnipotent.

18
00:00:53,094 --> 00:00:55,054
You are?

19
00:00:55,221 --> 00:00:56,930
Ross, I'm...

20
00:01:49,275 --> 00:01:51,485
How does she do that?

21
00:01:51,653 --> 00:01:54,822
I cannot sleep in a public place.

22
00:01:54,989 --> 00:01:56,323
Would you look at her?

23
00:01:56,491 --> 00:01:59,660
- She's so peaceful.
- Yeah.

24
00:01:59,828 --> 00:02:00,994
[BOTH SCREAM]

25
00:02:01,162 --> 00:02:03,622
What? What? Hi.

26
00:02:03,790 --> 00:02:05,958
It's okay, you know.
You just nodded off again.

27
00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:08,127
- Oh.
- What's going on with you?

28
00:02:08,294 --> 00:02:09,920
- I got no sleep last night.
ROSS: Why?

29
00:02:10,088 --> 00:02:13,090
My grandmother
has this new boyfriend...

30
00:02:13,883 --> 00:02:17,177
...and they're both kind of insecure
in bed, so...

31
00:02:17,345 --> 00:02:18,887
And deaf.

32
00:02:20,682 --> 00:02:24,726
So they're constantly having to reassure
each other that they're having a good time.

33
00:02:24,894 --> 00:02:26,937
You have no idea how loud they are.

34
00:02:29,023 --> 00:02:32,109
- You can stay with Rachel and me tonight.
- Thanks.

35
00:02:32,277 --> 00:02:34,278
Ninety-five, 96, 97.

36
00:02:34,445 --> 00:02:38,657
See, I told you.
Less than 100 steps from our place to here.

37
00:02:38,825 --> 00:02:41,660
You got way too much free time, man.

38
00:02:41,828 --> 00:02:44,913
Hey, there's the birthday boy.

39
00:02:45,081 --> 00:02:46,915
Ross, check it out. Hockey tickets.

40
00:02:47,083 --> 00:02:49,710
Rangers-Penguins tonight at the Garden.
We're taking you.

41
00:02:49,878 --> 00:02:51,879
- Happy birthday, pal.
- We love you, man.

42
00:02:52,046 --> 00:02:53,547
[ROSS CHUCKLES]

43
00:02:54,299 --> 00:02:57,217
It's funny,
my birthday was seven months ago.

44
00:02:57,760 --> 00:03:00,095
- So?
- So I'm guessing you had an extra ticket...

45
00:03:00,263 --> 00:03:03,557
...and couldn't decide
which one of you got to bring a date? Huh?

46
00:03:04,142 --> 00:03:06,977
Well, aren't we
Mr. The-Glass-is-Half-Empty?

47
00:03:07,979 --> 00:03:09,688
Oh, my God. Oh.

48
00:03:09,856 --> 00:03:11,857
Is today the 20th? October 20th?

49
00:03:12,025 --> 00:03:14,568
- I was hoping you wouldn't remember.
- Oh.

50
00:03:14,736 --> 00:03:16,153
What's wrong with the 20th?

51
00:03:16,321 --> 00:03:19,698
Eleven days before Halloween?
All the good costumes are gone?

52
00:03:20,992 --> 00:03:23,118
Today's the day Carol and I...

53
00:03:23,286 --> 00:03:26,830
...first consummated...

54
00:03:26,998 --> 00:03:29,791
...our physical relationship.

55
00:03:30,668 --> 00:03:32,461
We had sex.

56
00:03:34,881 --> 00:03:36,715
You know what?
I better pass on the game.

57
00:03:36,883 --> 00:03:41,970
I think I'm just gonna go home and think
about my ex-wife and her lesbian lover.

58
00:03:42,931 --> 00:03:45,807
The hell with hockey. Let's all do that.

59
00:03:47,518 --> 00:03:49,978
Come on, Ross. You, me, Joey, ice?

60
00:03:50,146 --> 00:03:52,397
Guys' night out?
Come on, what do you say, big guy?

61
00:03:52,565 --> 00:03:54,191
Huh? Huh? Huh?

62
00:03:54,359 --> 00:03:56,777
- What are you doing?
- I have no idea.

63
00:03:56,945 --> 00:03:58,195
Come on, Ross.

64
00:03:58,363 --> 00:04:01,156
All right, all right.
Maybe it will take my mind off it.

65
00:04:01,324 --> 00:04:03,825
- You promise to buy me a big foam finger?
JOEY: You got it.

66
00:04:03,993 --> 00:04:06,912
- All right.
- Look, look, look. My first paycheck.

67
00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:08,121
[ALL CHATTERING]

68
00:04:08,289 --> 00:04:12,626
Look at the window.
There's my name. Hi, me.

69
00:04:13,753 --> 00:04:15,837
I remember the day
I got my first paycheck.

70
00:04:16,005 --> 00:04:19,424
There was a cave-in in one of the mines,
and eight people were killed.

71
00:04:21,427 --> 00:04:22,970
Wow, you worked in a mine?

72
00:04:23,137 --> 00:04:25,806
No, I worked at a Dairy Queen. Why?

73
00:04:29,227 --> 00:04:31,895
God, isn't this exciting? I earned this.

74
00:04:32,063 --> 00:04:34,523
I wiped tables for it. I steamed milk for it.

75
00:04:34,691 --> 00:04:37,025
And it was totally...

76
00:04:37,193 --> 00:04:39,486
...not worth it.

77
00:04:39,654 --> 00:04:42,364
Who's FICA?
Why's he getting all my money?

78
00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:46,660
I mean, what...? Chandler, look at that.

79
00:04:48,204 --> 00:04:50,372
Oh, this is not that bad.

80
00:04:50,540 --> 00:04:52,624
Oh, you're fine, yeah, for a first job.

81
00:04:53,584 --> 00:04:58,922
- You can totally, totally live on this.
MONICA: Oh, yeah, yeah.

82
00:04:59,132 --> 00:05:00,382
By the way, great service today.

83
00:05:00,550 --> 00:05:01,675
- Ooh.
- Oh, yeah.

84
00:05:01,843 --> 00:05:03,302
MONICA: Terrific.
- It was excellent.

85
00:05:03,511 --> 00:05:06,471
CHANDLER: Unbelievable.
And all that milk and stuff? Great.

86
00:05:06,639 --> 00:05:09,224
CHANDLER & JOEY: Hockey.
- Hockey. Hockey.

87
00:05:19,902 --> 00:05:22,529
CHANDLER & JOEY: Hockey.
- Hockey. Hockey. Hockey.

88
00:05:24,032 --> 00:05:25,615
Rachel?

89
00:05:25,783 --> 00:05:26,825
[GASPS]

90
00:05:26,993 --> 00:05:28,035
Oh, my God!

91
00:05:28,244 --> 00:05:29,328
[ALL SHRIEKING]

92
00:05:34,167 --> 00:05:37,085
I swear I've seen birds do this
on Wild Kingdom.

93
00:05:38,463 --> 00:05:40,255
What are you guys doing here?

94
00:05:40,423 --> 00:05:43,633
Well, we were in the city shopping,
and your mom said you work here...

95
00:05:43,801 --> 00:05:46,136
...and it's true.

96
00:05:46,637 --> 00:05:48,013
Yeah.

97
00:05:48,181 --> 00:05:51,475
Look at you in the apron.
You look like you're in a play.

98
00:05:54,520 --> 00:05:58,023
God, look at you. You are so big.
I can't believe it.

99
00:05:58,191 --> 00:06:00,734
I know, I know. I'm a duplex.

100
00:06:02,278 --> 00:06:03,695
RACHEL:
So, what's going on with you?

101
00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:07,491
Well, guess who my dad's making partner
in his firm.

102
00:06:07,700 --> 00:06:10,285
[ALL SHRIEK]

103
00:06:10,536 --> 00:06:13,455
And while we're on the subject
of news...

104
00:06:13,664 --> 00:06:15,999
[ALL SHRIEK]

105
00:06:16,667 --> 00:06:17,959
Look, look. I have elbows.

106
00:06:18,127 --> 00:06:19,211
[BOTH SHRIEK]

107
00:06:25,051 --> 00:06:26,718
Passes it up to Leetch.

108
00:06:26,886 --> 00:06:28,887
Leetch spots Messier in the crease.
Here's the pass.

109
00:06:29,055 --> 00:06:30,889
Oh. Oh.

110
00:06:31,557 --> 00:06:35,268
We'll take a time-out while Messier stops
to look at some women's shoes.

111
00:06:36,020 --> 00:06:41,024
Carol was wearing boots just like those
the night that we first...

112
00:06:41,192 --> 00:06:42,651
...you know.

113
00:06:42,819 --> 00:06:44,403
In fact, she, uh...

114
00:06:44,570 --> 00:06:46,696
She never took them off. Ha, ha.

115
00:06:46,864 --> 00:06:49,366
It's because we... Sorry. Sorry.

116
00:06:50,743 --> 00:06:51,827
I can't believe...

117
00:06:51,994 --> 00:06:53,954
[ROSS SIGHS]

118
00:06:55,123 --> 00:06:57,082
- What?
- Peach pit.

119
00:06:57,542 --> 00:06:58,583
Yes, bunny?

120
00:07:00,128 --> 00:07:01,336
Peach pit.

121
00:07:01,504 --> 00:07:04,339
- That night, we, uh, had...
- Peaches?

122
00:07:04,507 --> 00:07:06,967
Actually, nectarines, but basically.

123
00:07:08,428 --> 00:07:11,138
- Could've been a peach.
- Then we, uh...

124
00:07:11,305 --> 00:07:15,475
Then we got dressed
and I walked her to...

125
00:07:15,643 --> 00:07:17,811
...the bus stop.

126
00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:20,313
I'm fine.

127
00:07:20,481 --> 00:07:22,607
Hey, that woman's got an ass
like Carol's.

128
00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:30,282
What?
I thought we were trying to find stuff.

129
00:07:31,451 --> 00:07:34,119
Oh, come on, you guys.
Tell me all the dirt.

130
00:07:34,287 --> 00:07:38,123
Well, the biggest news
is still you dumping Barry at the altar.

131
00:07:40,293 --> 00:07:44,004
- All right, let's talk reality for a second.
- Okay.

132
00:07:44,172 --> 00:07:46,506
- When are you coming home?
- What?

133
00:07:46,674 --> 00:07:47,799
Guys, I'm not.

134
00:07:47,967 --> 00:07:52,637
- Heh. Come on. This is us.
- I'm not.

135
00:07:52,805 --> 00:07:56,308
This is what I'm doing now.
I've got this job.

136
00:07:56,476 --> 00:07:58,143
Waitressing?

137
00:07:58,311 --> 00:08:01,062
Heh. I'm not just waitressing.

138
00:08:01,230 --> 00:08:03,690
I mean, I'm...

139
00:08:03,858 --> 00:08:05,525
I, um...

140
00:08:06,110 --> 00:08:09,654
I write the specials
on the specials board.

141
00:08:09,822 --> 00:08:13,992
And I take the dead flowers
out of the vase.

142
00:08:14,202 --> 00:08:19,080
Um, oh, and sometimes Arturo lets me put
the little chocolate blobbies on the cookies.

143
00:08:19,248 --> 00:08:22,083
Well, your mom didn't tell us
about the blobbies.

144
00:08:30,134 --> 00:08:32,135
[WHIRRING]

145
00:08:33,471 --> 00:08:35,347
MONICA:
Hey, Rach. How was it with your friends?

146
00:08:35,515 --> 00:08:37,474
[MONICA & PHOEBE SHRIEK]

147
00:08:39,602 --> 00:08:43,021
Okay, how would you like
some Tiki Death Punch?

148
00:08:43,189 --> 00:08:44,231
What's that?

149
00:08:44,398 --> 00:08:47,359
- Well, it's rum and...
- Okay.

150
00:08:50,112 --> 00:08:53,198
We thought since Phoebe's staying over
we'd have a slumber party.

151
00:08:53,366 --> 00:08:55,951
We got some trashy magazines,
we got cookie dough, we got Twister.

152
00:08:56,118 --> 00:08:57,285
[PHONE RINGS]

153
00:08:57,453 --> 00:08:59,871
Ooh, ooh. And I brought Operation.

154
00:09:00,039 --> 00:09:04,000
But I lost the tweezers,
so we can't operate.

155
00:09:04,710 --> 00:09:07,003
But we can prep the guy.

156
00:09:09,048 --> 00:09:11,258
Rach, it's the Visa-card people.

157
00:09:11,425 --> 00:09:13,718
Oh, God. Ask them what they want.

158
00:09:13,886 --> 00:09:17,222
Could you please tell me
what this is in reference to?

159
00:09:18,099 --> 00:09:19,140
Yes, hold on.

160
00:09:19,308 --> 00:09:21,893
Um, they say there's been unusual activity
on your account.

161
00:09:22,061 --> 00:09:26,314
- But I haven't used my card in weeks.
- That is the unusual activity.

162
00:09:28,401 --> 00:09:30,652
They just wanna see if you're okay.

163
00:09:30,820 --> 00:09:32,779
They wanna know if I'm okay?

164
00:09:32,947 --> 00:09:35,282
Okay, they wanna know if I'm okay.
Okay, let's see.

165
00:09:35,449 --> 00:09:38,868
Well, let's see.
The FICA guys took all my money.

166
00:09:39,036 --> 00:09:42,914
Everyone I know is either getting married
or getting pregnant or getting promoted...

167
00:09:43,082 --> 00:09:44,583
...and I'm getting coffee.

168
00:09:44,750 --> 00:09:46,876
And it's not even for me.

169
00:09:47,044 --> 00:09:50,630
So if that sounds like I'm okay, okay,
then you can tell them I'm okay. Okay?

170
00:09:53,509 --> 00:09:56,845
Uh, Rachel has left the building.

171
00:09:57,888 --> 00:10:01,516
- Can you call back?
- All right. Come on.

172
00:10:02,059 --> 00:10:04,603
[IN STRAINED VOICE]
Let's play Twister.

173
00:10:05,187 --> 00:10:07,188
["CHARGE" PLAYING ON SPEAKERS]

174
00:10:12,987 --> 00:10:16,114
- Sorry.
- Sorry, sorry, sorry.

175
00:10:16,282 --> 00:10:17,657
Uh-oh.

176
00:10:17,825 --> 00:10:20,577
What? There was ice there
that night with Carol?

177
00:10:20,745 --> 00:10:24,831
Plastic seats?
Four thousand angry Pittsburgh fans?

178
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:29,210
No, actually, I was just saying
it looks like we're not sitting together.

179
00:10:29,378 --> 00:10:33,131
But now that you mention it,
there was ice there that night.

180
00:10:33,841 --> 00:10:36,259
It was the first frost.

181
00:10:36,427 --> 00:10:39,346
- We were...
- Sit. Just sit down. Sit.

182
00:10:39,513 --> 00:10:40,805
You should feel great.

183
00:10:40,973 --> 00:10:43,141
You're doing this amazing
independent thing.

184
00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:45,435
Monica, what is so amazing?

185
00:10:45,603 --> 00:10:50,065
I gave up like everything. And for what?

186
00:10:50,232 --> 00:10:51,775
You are just like Jack.

187
00:10:52,443 --> 00:10:53,735
Jack from downstairs?

188
00:10:54,362 --> 00:10:57,405
No, Jack and the Beanstalk.

189
00:10:57,615 --> 00:11:00,367
- Ah, the other Jack.
- Yeah, right.

190
00:11:00,534 --> 00:11:04,162
See, he gave up something,
but then he got those magic beans.

191
00:11:04,330 --> 00:11:08,541
And then he woke up
and there was this big plant...

192
00:11:08,709 --> 00:11:12,170
...outside of his window,
full of possibilities and stuff.

193
00:11:12,338 --> 00:11:16,007
And he lived in a village,
and you live in the Village.

194
00:11:16,467 --> 00:11:20,011
Okay, but, Pheebs, Pheebs,
Jack gave up a cow.

195
00:11:20,179 --> 00:11:22,472
I gave up an orthodontist.

196
00:11:22,640 --> 00:11:25,016
Okay, I know I didn't love him, but...

197
00:11:25,184 --> 00:11:27,936
Oh, see, Jack did love the cow.

198
00:11:28,396 --> 00:11:31,314
But, see, it was a plan, you know?
It was clear.

199
00:11:31,482 --> 00:11:34,693
Everything was figured out,
and now everything's just kind of like...

200
00:11:34,860 --> 00:11:36,903
- Flupie?
- Yeah.

201
00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:41,157
You're not the only one.
We don't know where we're going.

202
00:11:41,325 --> 00:11:44,077
You gotta figure, at some point,
it's gonna come together...

203
00:11:44,245 --> 00:11:47,080
...and it's just gonna be "unflupie."

204
00:11:47,248 --> 00:11:48,832
Yeah, like that's a word.

205
00:11:52,169 --> 00:11:55,505
Okay, but, Monica,
what if it doesn't come together?

206
00:11:57,675 --> 00:11:59,300
Pheebs?

207
00:12:00,219 --> 00:12:03,680
Well, because you just...
I don't like this question.

208
00:12:04,890 --> 00:12:08,435
Okay, see? See, you guys?
What if we don't get magic beans?

209
00:12:08,602 --> 00:12:11,271
I mean, what if all we've got are...

210
00:12:11,439 --> 00:12:13,356
...beans?

211
00:12:16,944 --> 00:12:20,196
Get him! Get him! Get him!

212
00:12:20,364 --> 00:12:23,575
Get... Yes!
You're not laughing now, are you, pal?

213
00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:27,370
That's all you need, a bunch of toothless
guys hitting each other with sticks.

214
00:12:27,538 --> 00:12:29,831
Pass it. Pass it.

215
00:12:29,999 --> 00:12:33,877
CHANDLER: He's open, he's open.
Shoot it, shoot it, shoot it!

216
00:12:35,337 --> 00:12:36,379
[ROSS GROANS]

217
00:12:36,547 --> 00:12:38,548
- Whoa. Oh.
- Whoa.

218
00:12:39,842 --> 00:12:43,178
- Hey, look, we're on that TV thing.
- Ooh, ooh, ooh.

219
00:12:43,345 --> 00:12:46,014
- I got it!
- Hey, hey, we got it! Hey!

220
00:12:57,109 --> 00:12:58,777
Excuse me.

221
00:12:58,944 --> 00:13:03,281
It says to call this number if you're not
completely satisfied with this candy bar.

222
00:13:07,328 --> 00:13:10,413
Well, I'm not completely satisfied.

223
00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:12,665
Listen, it's kind of an emergency.

224
00:13:12,833 --> 00:13:15,293
I guess you'd know that,
or we'd be in the predicament room.

225
00:13:15,461 --> 00:13:17,086
[CHANDLER CHUCKLES]

226
00:13:18,798 --> 00:13:21,633
Hold on. Fill these out. Sit over there.

227
00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:24,010
ROSS: Look, I don't wanna
make any trouble, okay?

228
00:13:24,178 --> 00:13:28,473
But I'm in a lot of pain here, all right?
My face is dented.

229
00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:32,894
- Well, you'll have to wait your turn.
- Well, how long do you think it'll be?

230
00:13:33,312 --> 00:13:34,896
Any minute now.

231
00:13:35,064 --> 00:13:37,148
[LAUGHS]

232
00:13:37,650 --> 00:13:40,151
ROSS:
Hey, listen... Ooh.

233
00:13:41,862 --> 00:13:43,571
[MELANCHOLY POP SONG PLAYING
ON STEREO]

234
00:13:43,739 --> 00:13:48,827
I wake up and I start to cry

235
00:13:48,994 --> 00:13:50,954
Ain't no hope in...

236
00:13:51,121 --> 00:13:56,209
Oh. I'm so sorry, you guys.
I didn't mean to bring you down.

237
00:13:56,377 --> 00:13:58,753
No, you were right.

238
00:13:58,921 --> 00:14:01,714
I don't have a plan.

239
00:14:02,132 --> 00:14:03,341
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

240
00:14:03,884 --> 00:14:04,926
MAN:
Pizza guy.

241
00:14:05,094 --> 00:14:07,011
- Thank God.
- Food.

242
00:14:07,179 --> 00:14:09,389
- Phoebe?
PHOEBE: What?

243
00:14:09,557 --> 00:14:13,810
- Do you have a plan?
- I don't even have a "pla."

244
00:14:16,355 --> 00:14:18,606
Hi. One mushroom,
green pepper and onion?

245
00:14:19,149 --> 00:14:22,819
No, no, no. That's not what we ordered.

246
00:14:22,987 --> 00:14:27,115
We ordered a fat-free crust
with extra cheese.

247
00:14:29,827 --> 00:14:32,328
- Wait, you're not G. Stephanopoulos?
- No.

248
00:14:32,496 --> 00:14:35,623
- Oh, man. My dad's gonna kill me.
- Wait.

249
00:14:35,791 --> 00:14:39,127
Did you say G. Stephanopoulos?

250
00:14:39,295 --> 00:14:41,921
Yeah, this one goes across the street.
I must have given him yours.

251
00:14:42,089 --> 00:14:44,382
Oh, bonehead. Bonehead.

252
00:14:45,009 --> 00:14:49,888
Wait, was this a small Mediterranean guy
with curiously intelligent good looks?

253
00:14:50,806 --> 00:14:52,265
Yeah, that sounds about right.

254
00:14:52,433 --> 00:14:56,477
- Was he wearing a stunning blue suit?
- And a power tie?

255
00:14:57,313 --> 00:14:59,105
No, pretty much just a towel.

256
00:14:59,273 --> 00:15:01,149
- Oh, God.
- Oh. Oh.

257
00:15:01,317 --> 00:15:03,443
- Oh, my God.
- You want me to take this back?

258
00:15:03,611 --> 00:15:07,447
What? Are you nuts?
We've got George Stephanopoulos' pizza.

259
00:15:09,074 --> 00:15:10,533
Here.

260
00:15:12,036 --> 00:15:13,703
- Uh, Pheebs?
- Yeah?

261
00:15:13,871 --> 00:15:15,330
Who's George Snuffleupagus?

262
00:15:18,042 --> 00:15:19,417
That's Big Bird's friend.

263
00:15:19,627 --> 00:15:21,210
[LAUGHS]

264
00:15:22,713 --> 00:15:23,755
I see pizza.

265
00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:26,049
PHOEBE:
Oh, I wanna see. Let me see. Let me see.

266
00:15:26,216 --> 00:15:28,259
Hello? Who are we spying on?

267
00:15:28,427 --> 00:15:31,638
You know the White House adviser?
Clinton's campaign guy?

268
00:15:31,805 --> 00:15:35,224
The one with the great hair,
sexy smile, really cute butt?

269
00:15:35,392 --> 00:15:39,395
Oh, him. The little guy. Oh, I love him.

270
00:15:39,605 --> 00:15:42,732
Ooh. Oh, wait. Wait, I see a woman.

271
00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:44,984
Tell me it's his mother.

272
00:15:45,152 --> 00:15:47,820
- Definitely not his mother.
- Oh, no.

273
00:15:48,030 --> 00:15:50,073
Oh, wait, she's walking across the floor.

274
00:15:50,240 --> 00:15:52,992
She's walking, she's walking.

275
00:15:53,160 --> 00:15:56,746
She's going for the pizza.
Hey, that's not for you, bitch!

276
00:16:01,835 --> 00:16:04,921
WOMAN [OVER PA]:
Dr. Max to Center 456.

277
00:16:05,089 --> 00:16:08,841
Dr. Max to Center 456.

278
00:16:09,677 --> 00:16:10,927
[WHOOSHES]

279
00:16:11,762 --> 00:16:14,097
Excuse me.
We've been here for over an hour...

280
00:16:14,264 --> 00:16:16,683
...and people less sick than my friend
have gone in.

281
00:16:16,850 --> 00:16:19,936
I mean, that guy with the toe thing?
Who's he sleeping with?

282
00:16:23,273 --> 00:16:26,025
Oh, come on, Dora. Don't be mad.

283
00:16:26,193 --> 00:16:28,736
I know we both said some things...

284
00:16:30,030 --> 00:16:31,406
...we didn't mean...

285
00:16:31,573 --> 00:16:34,867
...but that doesn't mean
we still don't love each other.

286
00:16:35,369 --> 00:16:37,996
You know, I feel like I've lost her.

287
00:16:38,205 --> 00:16:39,372
[YELLS]

288
00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:43,918
- Lights still out?
- Yeah.

289
00:16:44,086 --> 00:16:46,004
Well, maybe they're napping.

290
00:16:46,171 --> 00:16:48,965
Heh. Please. They're having sex.

291
00:16:49,133 --> 00:16:50,633
MONICA & PHOEBE:
Shut up.

292
00:16:55,931 --> 00:16:59,267
So, what do you think George is like?

293
00:16:59,435 --> 00:17:01,811
- I think he's shy.
- Oh, yeah?

294
00:17:01,979 --> 00:17:04,605
Yeah. I think you have to draw him out.

295
00:17:04,773 --> 00:17:08,735
And then when you do,
he's a preppy animal.

296
00:17:08,944 --> 00:17:11,362
[ALL LAUGHING]

297
00:17:11,905 --> 00:17:13,364
Come on.

298
00:17:13,615 --> 00:17:16,868
I remember the moonlight coming in
through the open window...

299
00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:20,538
...and her face
had the most incredible glow.

300
00:17:20,706 --> 00:17:23,916
Yes, the moon, the glow,
the magical feeling.

301
00:17:24,084 --> 00:17:25,126
You did this part.

302
00:17:25,294 --> 00:17:28,337
Could I get some painkillers over here,
please?

303
00:17:29,006 --> 00:17:32,759
He's right, enough already.
What is the big deal about today?

304
00:17:32,926 --> 00:17:35,595
So you slept with her for the first time.
So what?

305
00:17:35,763 --> 00:17:38,181
You slept with her
for seven years after that.

306
00:17:39,683 --> 00:17:41,809
It's just a little more complicated
than that.

307
00:17:41,977 --> 00:17:44,771
What? What is it? That she left you?
That she likes women?

308
00:17:44,938 --> 00:17:47,106
That she left you for a woman
that likes women?

309
00:17:47,274 --> 00:17:48,316
A little louder.

310
00:17:48,484 --> 00:17:51,652
There's a man on the 12th floor in a coma
who didn't quite hear you.

311
00:17:55,282 --> 00:17:56,365
Then what?

312
00:17:57,493 --> 00:18:00,161
My first time with Carol was...

313
00:18:00,329 --> 00:18:01,370
Was my...

314
00:18:01,538 --> 00:18:02,747
[MUMBLES INDISTINCTLY]

315
00:18:03,624 --> 00:18:05,041
What?

316
00:18:07,586 --> 00:18:10,379
It was my first...

317
00:18:10,547 --> 00:18:11,964
...time.

318
00:18:13,008 --> 00:18:14,842
With Carol?

319
00:18:19,640 --> 00:18:20,973
Oh.

320
00:18:21,683 --> 00:18:24,519
So in your whole life,
you've only been with one?

321
00:18:24,686 --> 00:18:25,937
Oh.

322
00:18:26,814 --> 00:18:30,817
Oh, boy. Hockey was a big mistake.

323
00:18:31,276 --> 00:18:34,445
There's a whole bunch of stuff
we could've done tonight.

324
00:18:35,864 --> 00:18:38,241
Okay. Okay, I got one.

325
00:18:38,909 --> 00:18:43,538
Do you remember that vegetarian pâté
that I made that you loved so much?

326
00:18:43,705 --> 00:18:44,747
Uh-huh.

327
00:18:44,915 --> 00:18:45,957
[MONICA & RACHEL GIGGLE]

328
00:18:46,125 --> 00:18:49,252
Well, unless goose is a vegetable...

329
00:18:49,461 --> 00:18:52,630
- Oh! Oh!
MONICA & RACHEL: Ha-ha-ha.

330
00:18:52,798 --> 00:18:54,340
Okay, fine, fine.

331
00:18:54,508 --> 00:18:57,135
Now I don't feel so bad
about sleeping with Jason Hurley.

332
00:18:57,594 --> 00:19:01,389
- What? You slept with Jason?
- You had already broken up.

333
00:19:01,557 --> 00:19:04,058
- How long?
- Just a couple hours.

334
00:19:04,226 --> 00:19:06,227
Oh, that's nice.

335
00:19:06,395 --> 00:19:08,855
Okay, okay, okay, I got one.

336
00:19:10,858 --> 00:19:11,899
Anyway.

337
00:19:12,067 --> 00:19:15,778
The valentine Tommy Rollerson left
in your locker was really from me.

338
00:19:16,446 --> 00:19:17,488
Excuse me?

339
00:19:18,198 --> 00:19:21,826
Oh, hello?
Like he was really gonna send you one.

340
00:19:24,288 --> 00:19:26,414
She was a big girl.

341
00:19:26,623 --> 00:19:27,915
[LAUGHS]

342
00:19:28,083 --> 00:19:29,125
Really?

343
00:19:29,293 --> 00:19:34,589
Well, at least big girls don't pee
in their pants in seventh grade.

344
00:19:34,756 --> 00:19:37,550
I was laughing. You made me laugh.

345
00:19:37,718 --> 00:19:40,344
Oh, my God.
There he is. There he is. There he is.

346
00:19:40,512 --> 00:19:43,973
- Where?
- Right where we've been looking all night.

347
00:19:44,141 --> 00:19:47,101
- Oh, he's so cute.
- Oh, George, baby, drop the towel.

348
00:19:47,269 --> 00:19:49,520
- Come on, drop the towel.
RACHEL & PHOEBE: Drop the towel.

349
00:19:49,688 --> 00:19:51,564
MONICA:
Please drop the towel. Drop it.

350
00:19:52,024 --> 00:19:53,399
ALL:
Wow.

351
00:19:56,904 --> 00:20:01,991
Man, can you believe he's only had sex
with one woman?

352
00:20:02,868 --> 00:20:04,410
I think it's great.

353
00:20:04,578 --> 00:20:09,040
You know, it's sweet. It's romantic.

354
00:20:09,958 --> 00:20:11,083
Really?

355
00:20:11,251 --> 00:20:14,420
No, are you kidding?
The guy's a freak. I judge him.

356
00:20:14,588 --> 00:20:15,880
- Hey, man.
- Hey, buddy.

357
00:20:16,048 --> 00:20:17,882
ROSS:
Ah? Ah?

358
00:20:20,427 --> 00:20:21,719
Oh.

359
00:20:21,887 --> 00:20:23,554
That's attractive.

360
00:20:25,641 --> 00:20:27,683
Oh, I thought you were great
in Silence of the Lambs.

361
00:20:27,851 --> 00:20:29,852
[JOEY LAUGHING]

362
00:20:31,104 --> 00:20:34,398
Oh, come on, admit it,
all things considered, you had fun tonight.

363
00:20:34,566 --> 00:20:35,733
Fun? Where was the fun?

364
00:20:35,901 --> 00:20:38,486
Tell me specifically,
which part was the fun part?

365
00:20:38,654 --> 00:20:39,904
Where's my puck?

366
00:20:40,072 --> 00:20:42,865
- Oh. The kid has it.
- The kid?

367
00:20:43,700 --> 00:20:46,786
Ahem. Excuse me, uh, that's my puck.

368
00:20:46,954 --> 00:20:50,539
I found it.
Finders keepers, losers weepers.

369
00:20:54,044 --> 00:20:56,087
You gotta do it, man.

370
00:20:57,089 --> 00:20:59,966
Oh, yeah? Well, I'm rubber, you're glue.
Whatever you...

371
00:21:00,133 --> 00:21:02,218
I can't do it.

372
00:21:02,386 --> 00:21:05,513
- Listen, uh, give me back my puck.
- No.

373
00:21:05,681 --> 00:21:06,722
- Yes, how about?
- No.

374
00:21:06,890 --> 00:21:08,849
- No, come here. Just give me my puck.
- No, no, no.

375
00:21:09,017 --> 00:21:10,977
SIZEMORE:
Hey, no roughhousing in my ER.

376
00:21:11,144 --> 00:21:12,770
Give me my puck! Unh.

377
00:21:13,897 --> 00:21:15,064
[GRUNTS]

378
00:21:18,193 --> 00:21:20,736
Now, that was fun.

379
00:21:26,410 --> 00:21:28,035
ROSS:
Okay, Monica.

380
00:21:28,203 --> 00:21:30,746
Right foot, red.

381
00:21:30,956 --> 00:21:34,375
Could've played Monopoly, but no.

382
00:21:34,543 --> 00:21:35,584
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

383
00:21:40,674 --> 00:21:42,216
Thanks.

384
00:21:48,056 --> 00:21:51,142
Okay, Pheebs. Right hand, blue.

385
00:21:53,854 --> 00:21:56,188
- Good.
JOEY: Hmm?

386
00:21:58,608 --> 00:21:59,984
[PHONE RINGS]

387
00:22:00,986 --> 00:22:02,486
Hello?

388
00:22:03,030 --> 00:22:06,907
- Oh. Rachel, it's the Visa-card people.
RACHEL: Oh, okay. Will you take my place?

389
00:22:07,075 --> 00:22:08,993
All right. Yes, this is Rachel.

390
00:22:09,202 --> 00:22:10,661
RACHEL: No.
- Oh.

391
00:22:12,914 --> 00:22:13,956
Hello?

392
00:22:14,166 --> 00:22:18,044
Oh, yeah. No, I know.
I haven't been using it much.

393
00:22:18,211 --> 00:22:21,756
Oh, well, thanks, but I'm okay, really.

394
00:22:21,923 --> 00:22:23,299
To the green, to the green.

395
00:22:23,467 --> 00:22:24,675
MONICA: Oh, no.
- To the green.

396
00:22:24,843 --> 00:22:27,178
I've got magic beans.

397
00:22:29,473 --> 00:22:30,973
No, no, never mind.

398
00:22:31,141 --> 00:22:32,558
CHANDLER:
To the left. To the left.

399
00:22:32,726 --> 00:22:34,101
[ALL YELL]

400
00:22:35,228 --> 00:22:37,396
I'm fine.