1
00:00:01,627 --> 00:00:03,629
(BAD TO THE BONE PLAYING)
2
00:00:45,462 --> 00:00:46,797
(GUNSHOTS)
3
00:01:23,500 --> 00:01:24,793
Let's move out!
4
00:01:24,877 --> 00:01:26,461
MAN: Get in front
of that wall!
5
00:01:26,545 --> 00:01:27,880
Follow me!
6
00:01:49,234 --> 00:01:50,235
(GROANING)
7
00:01:52,279 --> 00:01:55,073
My arm!
I've been shot!
8
00:01:55,157 --> 00:01:56,491
(GROANING)
9
00:01:58,285 --> 00:02:00,454
Let me take a look at that.
10
00:02:01,330 --> 00:02:03,749
Want me to show you
a little trick?
11
00:02:04,166 --> 00:02:06,251
Take your mind off that arm?
12
00:02:06,668 --> 00:02:08,337
Give me your hand.
13
00:02:08,420 --> 00:02:11,089
You may feel a little pressure.
14
00:02:13,926 --> 00:02:15,260
(SCREAMING)
15
00:02:17,304 --> 00:02:20,057
My finger! My finger!
16
00:02:20,474 --> 00:02:21,850
Works every time.
17
00:02:36,031 --> 00:02:37,699
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
18
00:02:50,337 --> 00:02:52,089
You had better give up, Señor.
19
00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:53,966
You cannot kill us all.
20
00:02:54,049 --> 00:02:57,261
Nope, but I can
clean your colon
out quicker
21
00:02:57,344 --> 00:03:00,681
than one of them
burritos with extra
guacamole sauce.
22
00:03:00,764 --> 00:03:02,432
ALL: Ooh.
23
00:03:24,079 --> 00:03:25,414
At ease, Payne.
24
00:03:28,709 --> 00:03:29,751
Relax.
25
00:03:29,835 --> 00:03:31,962
Do you know why you're here?
26
00:03:32,170 --> 00:03:33,630
Sir, no, sir.
27
00:03:34,631 --> 00:03:37,634
The promotion board report
came out last week.
28
00:03:38,302 --> 00:03:40,262
This is the new
lieutenant colonel list.
29
00:03:40,345 --> 00:03:42,222
Your name is not on it.
30
00:03:43,807 --> 00:03:46,101
You get two chances to advance,
31
00:03:46,184 --> 00:03:48,520
then we gotta
show you the hatch.
32
00:03:49,688 --> 00:03:53,025
Base admin is cutting
your discharge orders
right now.
33
00:03:54,067 --> 00:03:55,360
General,
34
00:03:55,861 --> 00:03:58,613
are you trying to tell me,
in all this man's military,
35
00:03:58,697 --> 00:04:02,367
there is no room left
for a trained weapon
of destruction?
36
00:04:02,868 --> 00:04:05,912
The fighting
is no longer done on
the battlefields, Payne.
37
00:04:05,996 --> 00:04:08,915
Now all the blood is shed
in the halls of Congress.
38
00:04:08,999 --> 00:04:11,501
Warriors like us
are becoming dinosaurs.
39
00:04:14,338 --> 00:04:17,257
There's gotta be somebody
needs some killing.
40
00:04:17,674 --> 00:04:20,260
I'm sorry, Major.
There's no one left.
41
00:04:20,719 --> 00:04:22,596
You've killed 'em all.
42
00:04:22,971 --> 00:04:24,306
Good luck.
43
00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:37,319
PAYNE:
It's been two whole weeks
since I killed me a man,
44
00:04:37,569 --> 00:04:40,781
and already I'm starting
to get the itch.
45
00:04:41,782 --> 00:04:45,160
Problem is,
I ain't got nothing
to scratch.
46
00:04:46,787 --> 00:04:48,580
God, I'm hungry.
47
00:04:49,915 --> 00:04:51,833
Hungry for action.
48
00:04:52,667 --> 00:04:55,212
Hungry for blood.
49
00:04:56,171 --> 00:04:57,339
Hell,
50
00:04:58,215 --> 00:05:01,385
I'm just plain old hungry.
51
00:05:03,929 --> 00:05:05,180
(CAT MEOWS)
52
00:05:05,263 --> 00:05:06,598
(HISSES)
53
00:05:07,974 --> 00:05:09,893
Feel I'm getting weaker
54
00:05:10,727 --> 00:05:14,272
while Charlie's
growing stronger
in the jungle.
55
00:05:15,107 --> 00:05:16,900
I can't lose my edge.
56
00:05:17,692 --> 00:05:19,820
I gotta keep my strength up.
57
00:05:20,237 --> 00:05:22,406
I gotta maintain discipline.
58
00:05:23,281 --> 00:05:25,700
Because the hard reality was,
59
00:05:26,451 --> 00:05:28,286
I gotta get a job.
60
00:05:29,621 --> 00:05:31,415
And what better place
61
00:05:31,748 --> 00:05:35,585
than somewhere
that would allow me
to employ my skills
62
00:05:36,002 --> 00:05:38,046
as a trained killer.
63
00:05:38,130 --> 00:05:40,298
Mr. Payne?
64
00:05:42,634 --> 00:05:46,096
This is a dramatization
of a domestic
violence dispute.
65
00:05:46,888 --> 00:05:48,640
You arrive
on the scene
to find a woman,
66
00:05:48,723 --> 00:05:50,684
played by Miss Goodwin...
67
00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:51,893
Hello, ma'am.
68
00:05:51,977 --> 00:05:53,897
Claiming to have
been assaulted
by her husband,
69
00:05:53,979 --> 00:05:56,148
played by
Mr. Shipman.
70
00:05:56,231 --> 00:05:57,315
Happy to meet you.
71
00:05:57,399 --> 00:05:58,775
Same here.
72
00:05:59,317 --> 00:06:02,946
Your objective is
to effectively
neutralize the situation.
73
00:06:03,780 --> 00:06:04,990
Neutralize.
74
00:06:07,159 --> 00:06:08,160
Begin.
75
00:06:08,910 --> 00:06:10,579
(CRYING)
76
00:06:10,662 --> 00:06:11,997
He hit me!
77
00:06:12,998 --> 00:06:14,249
You like to beat women?
78
00:06:14,332 --> 00:06:15,292
Officer...
79
00:06:15,375 --> 00:06:18,879
You'll never hit her again.
80
00:06:18,962 --> 00:06:20,547
Hear me? Hear me? Huh?
I can't...
81
00:06:20,630 --> 00:06:21,965
(GRUNTING)
82
00:06:23,008 --> 00:06:24,801
(BUZZER SOUNDS)
83
00:06:33,852 --> 00:06:37,105
Payne, what happened?
You've only
been out one week.
84
00:06:37,689 --> 00:06:41,902
It's civilian life, sir.
I had a minor setback.
85
00:06:42,402 --> 00:06:45,363
Listen, I made
some calls, and I got
an assignment for you.
86
00:06:45,447 --> 00:06:47,282
It's not great, you understand,
87
00:06:47,365 --> 00:06:49,910
but it gets you back
in the military.
88
00:06:51,703 --> 00:06:53,788
PAYNE: So after
two and a half weeks
89
00:06:53,872 --> 00:06:57,375
of living a civilian
puke's existence,
90
00:06:58,126 --> 00:07:00,045
I was back in uniform.
91
00:07:00,921 --> 00:07:02,714
Back in the Corps.
92
00:07:03,131 --> 00:07:06,593
Back to the sweet smell
of mustard gas
93
00:07:07,677 --> 00:07:09,221
and killing.
94
00:07:11,097 --> 00:07:13,725
Little did I know
what awaited for me.
95
00:07:14,684 --> 00:07:18,897
I've toured
11 separate engagements
from Iraq to Haiti,
96
00:07:19,731 --> 00:07:23,527
but nothing I did
would prepare me for
this newest assignment.
97
00:07:24,236 --> 00:07:27,322
I was told it would be
my greatest challenge.
98
00:07:28,073 --> 00:07:31,535
It was sure to be
a living hell.
99
00:07:52,764 --> 00:07:56,851
DR. PHILLIPS: (ON PA)
The glee club will be
meeting at 3:30.
100
00:07:56,935 --> 00:07:58,436
(BELL RINGING)
101
00:07:58,603 --> 00:08:00,438
(STUDENTS CHATTERING)
102
00:08:04,568 --> 00:08:10,615
Will the teachers
please report to the quad
for the science fair judging.
103
00:08:11,199 --> 00:08:14,786
EMILY: Tiger?
Tiger, come back here!
I'm not gonna chase you!
104
00:08:16,913 --> 00:08:18,123
(GROANS)
105
00:08:19,708 --> 00:08:21,084
(SNARLS)
106
00:08:24,921 --> 00:08:26,715
What you running from, boy?
107
00:08:26,798 --> 00:08:29,050
She's trying to give me a shot.
108
00:08:29,718 --> 00:08:31,636
You don't like needles?
109
00:08:32,721 --> 00:08:36,808
Want me to show you
a little trick to take
your mind off that pain?
110
00:08:37,309 --> 00:08:39,311
Here, give me your hand.
111
00:08:40,812 --> 00:08:43,648
Now you may feel
a little bit
of pressure.
112
00:08:44,399 --> 00:08:46,818
Hi, I'm Emily Walburn,
the school counselor.
113
00:08:46,901 --> 00:08:48,820
You must be Major Payne.
114
00:08:50,488 --> 00:08:53,033
That's a mighty fine
handshake you got there.
115
00:08:53,116 --> 00:08:54,075
(CHUCKLES)
116
00:08:54,159 --> 00:08:55,827
You wanna wrestle?
117
00:08:56,870 --> 00:08:58,580
No, thanks.
118
00:08:58,663 --> 00:09:00,415
I wrestle with
these kids all day.
119
00:09:00,498 --> 00:09:02,834
This one's usually
my big helper.
120
00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:04,586
Come on, Tiger.
121
00:09:04,669 --> 00:09:05,670
Nice meeting you, Major.
122
00:09:05,754 --> 00:09:08,006
Nice meeting you, Miss ma'am.
123
00:09:10,258 --> 00:09:11,301
Tiger!
124
00:09:11,926 --> 00:09:13,511
Tiger, come back here!
125
00:09:14,137 --> 00:09:16,014
I'm not gonna chase you.
126
00:09:19,476 --> 00:09:20,560
Mmm.
127
00:09:24,314 --> 00:09:25,482
(KNOCK AT DOOR)
128
00:09:25,565 --> 00:09:27,442
DR. PHILLIPS: Come in.
129
00:09:35,700 --> 00:09:38,203
Major Payne reporting
for duty, sir.
130
00:09:42,040 --> 00:09:43,208
What?
131
00:09:43,625 --> 00:09:46,503
Major Payne,
the new commandant.
132
00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:49,005
Oh, right.
133
00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:51,883
You're in charge
of the green boys.
134
00:09:53,051 --> 00:09:54,427
Come again?
135
00:09:54,969 --> 00:09:56,513
The green boys.
136
00:09:56,846 --> 00:09:59,224
They wear those green things.
137
00:10:00,016 --> 00:10:04,270
You know, it's funny.
When they stand in front
of bushes, I can't see them.
138
00:10:05,105 --> 00:10:06,523
(BUZZING STOPS)
139
00:10:06,606 --> 00:10:08,233
Why are you here?
140
00:10:09,359 --> 00:10:11,986
The ROTC program.
141
00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:13,822
I understand
you've been placing last
142
00:10:13,905 --> 00:10:16,533
eight years running
in the
Virginia Military Games.
143
00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:18,660
I am here to remedy that.
144
00:10:21,079 --> 00:10:24,040
We have an ROTC program?
145
00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:26,501
The green boys, sir.
146
00:10:26,584 --> 00:10:27,877
Oh, right.
147
00:10:27,961 --> 00:10:32,549
Between us, I don't care
what you do
with those boys,
148
00:10:32,757 --> 00:10:35,468
as long as you keep them
out of my hair.
149
00:10:36,177 --> 00:10:37,595
Is that all?
150
00:10:39,013 --> 00:10:41,725
Oh, would you like
a tour of the campus?
151
00:10:42,016 --> 00:10:44,185
No, I'd like to see my men.
152
00:10:44,978 --> 00:10:47,981
Fall in!
Move it, you idiots!
Let's go!
153
00:10:49,399 --> 00:10:52,861
Come on, Williams!
Let's move it.
Get a hop on it, boy!
154
00:10:53,403 --> 00:10:54,779
(SCREAMS)
155
00:10:56,614 --> 00:10:58,366
Fall in, everyone!
Fall in! Let's go!
156
00:10:58,450 --> 00:11:01,202
Come on, people!
Move!
157
00:11:01,286 --> 00:11:03,788
Hustle, hustle, hustle!
Let's go. Giddyup!
158
00:11:03,872 --> 00:11:06,791
Giddyup, giddyup,
giddyup, giddyup.
Let's go!
159
00:11:12,297 --> 00:11:14,466
Sir, the squad is formed, sir!
160
00:11:22,140 --> 00:11:23,391
Carry on.
161
00:11:29,481 --> 00:11:34,277
My name
is Major Benson
Winifred Payne.
162
00:11:35,236 --> 00:11:37,947
As of 0800,
163
00:11:38,323 --> 00:11:40,909
I am replacing Major Frankfurt
164
00:11:40,992 --> 00:11:43,703
as your commanding officer.
165
00:11:44,245 --> 00:11:45,830
(ALL BOOING)
166
00:11:47,290 --> 00:11:48,625
(GUNSHOTS)
167
00:11:51,795 --> 00:11:53,922
See now, what we have here
168
00:11:54,005 --> 00:11:57,342
is a failure to communicate.
169
00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:04,224
Do not attempt
170
00:12:04,307 --> 00:12:07,936
to challenge my authority.
171
00:12:08,228 --> 00:12:11,648
I have eight weeks
to turn you
gaggle of maggots
172
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:14,484
into a well-disciplined
cadet unit.
173
00:12:15,026 --> 00:12:20,490
From this day forward,
your sorry asses
belong to me.
174
00:12:21,032 --> 00:12:25,328
You will not eat, sleep,
drink, blow your nose
175
00:12:25,411 --> 00:12:29,290
or even dig in your butts
without my say-so!
176
00:12:29,999 --> 00:12:31,334
Know this.
177
00:12:31,417 --> 00:12:34,629
Killing is my business, ladies,
178
00:12:34,712 --> 00:12:38,007
and business is good.
179
00:12:38,550 --> 00:12:39,676
Boo-hoo.
180
00:12:41,386 --> 00:12:42,512
What?
181
00:12:42,679 --> 00:12:44,806
I have to go to the bathroom.
182
00:12:45,014 --> 00:12:46,683
You hold it, turd.
183
00:12:46,975 --> 00:12:48,476
I can't!
184
00:12:49,936 --> 00:12:54,858
I said hold it, or I'll
break that off and kick it
around on the ground.
185
00:12:58,027 --> 00:13:00,405
Now be advised, ladies.
186
00:13:00,613 --> 00:13:04,409
We are going to win
the Virginia Military Games.
187
00:13:04,742 --> 00:13:06,452
(MOANING) I said win.
188
00:13:06,536 --> 00:13:09,330
Whiskey, Indian, November.
189
00:13:09,414 --> 00:13:11,666
Get used to the sound
of that word!
190
00:13:11,749 --> 00:13:13,376
Major Payne!
191
00:13:13,459 --> 00:13:16,212
What, boy?
What? What? What?
192
00:13:16,921 --> 00:13:18,590
I did something bad.
193
00:13:24,137 --> 00:13:27,181
You nasty little worm.
194
00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:31,686
(CRYING)
Go change your Huggies, boy,
and be back here pronto!
195
00:13:31,769 --> 00:13:33,396
Stop that crying.
196
00:13:33,605 --> 00:13:35,356
You'll get no pity from me.
197
00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:38,610
You think your tears
will stop Charlie
from taking his bayonet
198
00:13:38,693 --> 00:13:41,446
and sticking it
in your little
tiny heart?
199
00:13:43,573 --> 00:13:47,452
PAYNE: What the hell
was that, you little
freckle-faced cartoon?
200
00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:52,957
Did I give you
permission
to sneeze, Opie?
201
00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:54,083
No, sir.
202
00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:56,711
Then you hold it in,
you big-eared turd.
203
00:13:56,794 --> 00:13:59,631
Otherwise I'll
kick your ass
back to Mayberry.
204
00:14:02,050 --> 00:14:05,511
I see we have
a sickly boy
on our hands.
205
00:14:05,595 --> 00:14:08,306
Well, we're gonna
have to boost
your immune system, son.
206
00:14:08,389 --> 00:14:12,727
Drop down. Give me
25 pushups now.
207
00:14:12,977 --> 00:14:14,187
Count 'em out!
208
00:14:14,354 --> 00:14:15,521
One, sir.
209
00:14:15,647 --> 00:14:17,440
(SNICKERING) Two, sir.
210
00:14:19,609 --> 00:14:20,818
(SNORTS)
211
00:14:21,486 --> 00:14:23,029
(MIMICKING SNORT)
212
00:14:23,112 --> 00:14:25,615
What are you
laughing at, pig boy?
213
00:14:26,157 --> 00:14:28,409
You find a piece of candy
in your pocket?
214
00:14:28,493 --> 00:14:29,577
No, sir.
215
00:14:29,661 --> 00:14:31,120
What's your name, tubby?
216
00:14:31,496 --> 00:14:33,164
Heathcoat, sir.
217
00:14:33,247 --> 00:14:34,666
Heathcoat.
218
00:14:34,749 --> 00:14:37,210
You know, you remind
me of the Doughboy.
219
00:14:37,293 --> 00:14:39,128
If I poke your stomach,
will it make you go...
220
00:14:39,212 --> 00:14:40,630
(GIGGLES)
221
00:14:41,547 --> 00:14:44,217
You know what?
I'm gonna help you make room
for lunch, bacon boy.
222
00:14:44,300 --> 00:14:48,054
Drop down, give me
30 sit-ups right now!
Let's go!
223
00:14:48,554 --> 00:14:51,599
Count 'em out.
Let me see
that belly roll.
224
00:14:51,766 --> 00:14:54,435
(GROANING) One, tubby, tubby.
225
00:14:54,519 --> 00:14:56,729
One, sir.
Come on, pork chop.
226
00:14:57,230 --> 00:14:58,898
Two, chubby, chubby.
Two, sir.
227
00:14:58,982 --> 00:15:00,233
(WHOOPS)
228
00:15:00,316 --> 00:15:02,068
You is a pure genius.
229
00:15:02,151 --> 00:15:03,778
Who are you?
Redd Foxx?
230
00:15:03,861 --> 00:15:06,781
No, better yet,
you Richard Pryor,
ain't you?
231
00:15:08,157 --> 00:15:09,993
What's your name, girlfriend?
232
00:15:10,076 --> 00:15:13,371
Dwight Williams,
but my boys call me D.
So you can call me D.
233
00:15:13,454 --> 00:15:15,206
D, huh?
Yeah, brother.
234
00:15:16,416 --> 00:15:19,043
You like the way
I handle these
white boys, D?
235
00:15:19,127 --> 00:15:20,628
(CHUCKLING) Oh, yeah.
236
00:15:20,712 --> 00:15:23,548
It make you feel good
to see a black man
running things, huh?
237
00:15:23,631 --> 00:15:25,133
Malcolm X.
238
00:15:25,216 --> 00:15:26,843
Well, let me tell
you something, D.
239
00:15:26,968 --> 00:15:29,178
Yeah, brother?
Why don't
you come closer.
240
00:15:29,262 --> 00:15:32,640
I am not your damn brother!
241
00:15:32,724 --> 00:15:36,477
Now drop down
and give me 20
squat thrusts now!
242
00:15:39,355 --> 00:15:40,481
WILLIAMS: One, sir.
243
00:15:40,565 --> 00:15:42,817
What are you looking at,
ass eyes?
244
00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:44,402
Nothing, sir!
245
00:15:44,569 --> 00:15:45,945
You plotting on me, boy?
246
00:15:46,029 --> 00:15:47,113
No, sir!
247
00:15:47,196 --> 00:15:49,824
Well, let me
tell you something,
ass eyes.
248
00:15:49,907 --> 00:15:51,659
Let me tell you all something.
249
00:15:51,743 --> 00:15:54,495
War has made me very paranoid!
250
00:15:54,579 --> 00:15:56,581
And when a man gets
to eyeballing me,
251
00:15:56,664 --> 00:16:00,043
it makes my Agent Orange
act up, and I get
the urge to kill!
252
00:16:00,126 --> 00:16:01,169
Do you understand me?
253
00:16:01,252 --> 00:16:02,336
Sir, yes, sir!
254
00:16:02,420 --> 00:16:04,005
Do you all understand me?
255
00:16:04,088 --> 00:16:05,339
ALL: Sir, yes, sir!
256
00:16:05,423 --> 00:16:06,758
I can't hear you.
257
00:16:06,841 --> 00:16:08,342
ALL: Sir, yes, sir!
258
00:16:08,426 --> 00:16:11,179
And what is
your damage,
muscle head?
259
00:16:11,387 --> 00:16:14,849
You stupid,
you ignorant or you
just plain old deaf?
260
00:16:14,932 --> 00:16:17,977
Yes, sir.
Actually,
he is deaf.
261
00:16:18,519 --> 00:16:20,688
Oh. Well, thank you.
262
00:16:21,272 --> 00:16:25,902
Now drop down,
give me 25 more
for speaking out of line!
263
00:16:28,237 --> 00:16:29,906
WULIGER: One, sir.
264
00:16:30,323 --> 00:16:32,533
I'm sorry,
Mr. Handicapped Man.
265
00:16:32,617 --> 00:16:34,994
I didn't mean to offend you.
266
00:16:35,078 --> 00:16:36,704
Do you speak sign language?
267
00:16:36,788 --> 00:16:39,582
Can you read lips?
Let me break it down.
268
00:16:39,665 --> 00:16:44,003
If you don't answer me
when I speak to you,
269
00:16:44,295 --> 00:16:46,881
I'm gonna put my foot
in your ass!
270
00:16:46,964 --> 00:16:48,674
Is that clear, dummy?
271
00:16:48,758 --> 00:16:50,093
Sir, yes, sir.
272
00:16:50,301 --> 00:16:51,886
(STONE WHOOPING)
273
00:16:52,762 --> 00:16:54,722
Hold on, guys.
Wait up.
274
00:16:57,016 --> 00:16:58,142
Wait.
275
00:16:58,351 --> 00:17:00,478
Hey, guys!
Don't start
without me!
276
00:17:00,561 --> 00:17:02,438
Come on!
Wait! Hold on.
277
00:17:03,981 --> 00:17:05,191
Coming.
278
00:17:08,486 --> 00:17:11,781
Hello, gorgeous.
Welcome to my party.
279
00:17:12,365 --> 00:17:15,827
You know, you're
out of uniform there,
Mr. Fonzarelli.
280
00:17:16,119 --> 00:17:19,205
Yeah, well,
I like this look
better, General.
281
00:17:19,330 --> 00:17:20,915
Admiral. Whatever.
282
00:17:20,998 --> 00:17:23,626
It's Major, boy.
283
00:17:24,710 --> 00:17:29,715
Ooh. Looks like
we got another major
on our hands here, guys.
284
00:17:29,799 --> 00:17:32,885
ALL: Oh, major!
Oh, major!
285
00:17:40,351 --> 00:17:42,603
What's your name, girlie mouth?
286
00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:46,732
Cadet Alex Stone, sir!
287
00:17:46,816 --> 00:17:49,235
Yes, sir.
Hey, ho, sir.
288
00:17:53,906 --> 00:17:57,076
Well, I'm glad
to see you've got
a sense of humor.
289
00:17:57,702 --> 00:17:58,953
So do I.
290
00:17:59,036 --> 00:18:00,538
(CHUCKLES)
291
00:18:07,712 --> 00:18:11,966
From now on,
my little group
of scrotum sacs,
292
00:18:12,049 --> 00:18:14,886
you will strive to be like me.
293
00:18:15,011 --> 00:18:17,555
You will walk like me,
294
00:18:17,722 --> 00:18:19,765
talk like me,
295
00:18:19,849 --> 00:18:22,476
and until you win those Games,
296
00:18:22,560 --> 00:18:26,230
you will be bald like me.
297
00:18:27,565 --> 00:18:29,317
Way to go this time, Alex.
298
00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:32,153
Dotson, take these men
for two hours of PT!
299
00:18:32,236 --> 00:18:33,279
Yes, sir!
300
00:18:33,362 --> 00:18:36,073
First exercise
will be the
side-straddle hop!
301
00:18:36,157 --> 00:18:37,158
(ALL MOANING)
302
00:18:37,241 --> 00:18:39,702
Squad, ready.
Exercise!
303
00:18:39,785 --> 00:18:41,662
One, two, three.
304
00:18:41,746 --> 00:18:43,915
Come on, bacon boy!
Come on!
305
00:18:47,793 --> 00:18:49,712
DOTSON:
Command, one!
306
00:18:49,795 --> 00:18:52,256
STONE: Hey, Dotson,
why don't you just
sit down and shut up.
307
00:18:52,340 --> 00:18:53,466
I'm writing you up, buddy!
308
00:18:53,549 --> 00:18:55,343
That's it.
No more of this!
309
00:18:55,426 --> 00:18:57,637
Quit it, Dotson.
You're scaring me!
310
00:19:02,558 --> 00:19:04,393
Hello, Miss Walburn.
311
00:19:05,645 --> 00:19:09,398
Major Payne,
could you please
help me to understand
312
00:19:09,482 --> 00:19:11,817
why you shaved
the children bald?
313
00:19:12,735 --> 00:19:16,030
Oh, that's my little
incentive program.
314
00:19:16,113 --> 00:19:18,532
These boys have
to earn their due.
315
00:19:18,950 --> 00:19:20,868
Their hairdo, that is.
316
00:19:20,952 --> 00:19:22,286
(CHUCKLES)
317
00:19:24,580 --> 00:19:27,833
Do they have
to earn their bathroom
privileges, too?
318
00:19:33,464 --> 00:19:36,634
What do you want,
Mr. Pee-body?
319
00:19:37,009 --> 00:19:39,512
Well, he's upset
about this morning.
320
00:19:39,595 --> 00:19:42,139
Apparently, he had
a little accident.
321
00:19:42,807 --> 00:19:46,477
Apparently,
he pissed all over
the front of his pants.
322
00:19:46,936 --> 00:19:49,355
Well, maybe
that's because
he's six.
323
00:19:49,939 --> 00:19:51,023
Maybe 'cause he's six.
324
00:19:51,107 --> 00:19:54,443
Woman, when I was
six years old,
I had a fulltime job.
325
00:19:55,903 --> 00:20:00,408
Well, I told him that
you have something that
you'd like to say to him.
326
00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:02,827
(INAUDIBLE)
327
00:20:03,202 --> 00:20:04,578
(INAUDIBLE)
328
00:20:12,295 --> 00:20:14,505
You think I owe you an apology?
329
00:20:16,340 --> 00:20:21,554
Want me to take back
some of those mean and
hurtful little things I said?
330
00:20:24,015 --> 00:20:25,224
Okay.
331
00:20:25,641 --> 00:20:28,269
I'm sorry
you're just a little turd
332
00:20:28,352 --> 00:20:31,147
that can't hold
your liquid out in public.
333
00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:36,110
Now you get on out of my face
before I pick you up and
toss you out of that window.
334
00:20:36,193 --> 00:20:37,445
(GASPS)
335
00:20:42,658 --> 00:20:45,953
Major, have you ever done
this kind of work before?
336
00:20:47,330 --> 00:20:48,622
Woman,
337
00:20:49,040 --> 00:20:54,128
under this here hat,
I've trained 20,432
338
00:20:54,211 --> 00:20:56,422
combat killing machines.
339
00:20:57,548 --> 00:20:59,467
Well, that's just my point.
340
00:20:59,550 --> 00:21:01,635
You see,
now you're dealing
with children,
341
00:21:01,719 --> 00:21:04,055
and children
have special needs.
342
00:21:04,930 --> 00:21:07,892
Do you know what
positive
reinforcement means?
343
00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:11,604
Is that anything like
where you take a POW
and you snap his neck
344
00:21:11,687 --> 00:21:16,400
after you torture him
so he don't have to go through
life with a colostomy bag?
345
00:21:18,486 --> 00:21:19,737
Sort of.
346
00:21:21,781 --> 00:21:23,991
I'd like to make a suggestion.
347
00:21:25,493 --> 00:21:28,412
Why don't you and I
become partners
348
00:21:28,746 --> 00:21:32,500
in the emotional growth
and development of
these little ones?
349
00:21:33,959 --> 00:21:35,586
What do you say?
350
00:21:38,422 --> 00:21:41,634
Can you be my big helper
and help me do that?
351
00:21:44,678 --> 00:21:45,805
Yes.
352
00:21:47,723 --> 00:21:48,849
Good.
353
00:21:55,606 --> 00:21:58,025
Why do I feel like a jackass?
354
00:21:59,235 --> 00:22:01,028
(STUDENTS LAUGHING)
355
00:22:02,196 --> 00:22:04,782
BOY 1: (LAUGHING)
Look at that! Baldy!
356
00:22:07,201 --> 00:22:10,413
BOY 2: Hey,
your head's shaped
like a bowling ball!
357
00:22:15,835 --> 00:22:17,962
Nazi fascist pig!
358
00:22:18,629 --> 00:22:20,923
I know where
I'm gonna shave him.
359
00:22:21,006 --> 00:22:22,383
Damn Major Payne.
360
00:22:22,466 --> 00:22:24,635
WILLIAMS: I didn't want
you to be my damn brother
in the first place.
361
00:22:24,718 --> 00:22:26,971
WULIGER: Most of the body
heat travels through
the head, you know.
362
00:22:27,054 --> 00:22:28,973
It means I'm gonna be
colder, and I get sick.
363
00:22:29,181 --> 00:22:31,350
And if I'm sick,
I'm gonna start
throwing up...
364
00:22:31,434 --> 00:22:34,603
WILLIAMS: Man, that damn
Payne's already starting
to get on my nerves.
365
00:22:34,687 --> 00:22:37,440
Turd this, turd that.
Who does he think he is?
366
00:22:38,274 --> 00:22:39,733
Just shut up.
367
00:22:41,318 --> 00:22:42,403
You telling me to shut up?
368
00:22:42,486 --> 00:22:43,904
Why don't you
shut your damn mouth
369
00:22:43,988 --> 00:22:46,574
and stop eating
all that damn candy,
you fat pig.
370
00:22:49,952 --> 00:22:52,663
I look like Curly
from The Three Stooges.
371
00:22:54,457 --> 00:22:56,792
Did I say you could
touch my bed?
372
00:22:57,460 --> 00:22:58,461
No.
373
00:22:58,836 --> 00:23:00,463
Then get off.
374
00:23:00,546 --> 00:23:01,964
Ow!
375
00:23:03,507 --> 00:23:05,134
Payne's gonna kill us.
376
00:23:05,217 --> 00:23:07,428
You know I have
a heart condition.
377
00:23:07,511 --> 00:23:10,598
I'm not sure he's familiar
with my medical history.
378
00:23:10,681 --> 00:23:12,391
Let's go, let's go,
let's go! Come on!
379
00:23:12,475 --> 00:23:15,644
Move it! Saddle up
that horsey and ride!
380
00:23:15,853 --> 00:23:18,272
You ever hear of
knocking, Dotson?
381
00:23:18,981 --> 00:23:20,941
You won't have to worry
about that anymore.
382
00:23:21,025 --> 00:23:23,027
I have good news
for you assholes.
383
00:23:23,110 --> 00:23:26,572
Pack your bedding, your kit
and your clothes! Let's go!
384
00:23:26,989 --> 00:23:28,240
Where to?
385
00:23:30,451 --> 00:23:35,456
Hello, cue balls.
Welcome to
the House of Payne.
386
00:23:35,539 --> 00:23:36,707
(THUNDERING)
387
00:23:36,790 --> 00:23:38,042
You gotta be joking.
388
00:23:38,125 --> 00:23:42,129
A squad that
lives together,
wins together.
389
00:23:42,630 --> 00:23:44,256
Unity, turds.
390
00:23:44,340 --> 00:23:48,594
That is the key word
in "unit" without the Y.
391
00:23:49,595 --> 00:23:54,350
Tiger, Leland,
you will reside at
the ROTC building.
392
00:23:55,226 --> 00:23:59,939
The rest of you garbage,
grab a rack and settle in.
393
00:24:00,564 --> 00:24:02,107
Let's move out.
394
00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:05,653
You eyeball me again,
I'll snatch it out
395
00:24:05,736 --> 00:24:08,239
and put it
in Heathcoat's
cookie bag.
396
00:24:08,656 --> 00:24:11,408
It's so damp.
What about
my allergies?
397
00:24:11,492 --> 00:24:13,160
You know how far
we are
from the kitchen?
398
00:24:13,244 --> 00:24:15,204
TIGER: Why can't I stay here
with the rest of these guys?
Shut up.
399
00:24:15,287 --> 00:24:16,747
PAYNE:
'Cause I said so, turd.
400
00:24:16,830 --> 00:24:18,457
Major Payne, sir.
401
00:24:19,375 --> 00:24:20,459
What?
402
00:24:21,502 --> 00:24:26,090
Sir, I think I speak for
everyone when I say that
this place is unacceptable,
403
00:24:26,590 --> 00:24:27,591
sir.
404
00:24:27,716 --> 00:24:29,260
(ALL MUTTERING)
405
00:24:31,136 --> 00:24:32,429
Really?
406
00:24:33,138 --> 00:24:36,100
PAYNE: (SINGING)
Love my barracks
night and day
407
00:24:36,183 --> 00:24:38,644
ALL: (SINGING)
Love my barracks
night and day
408
00:24:38,727 --> 00:24:41,522
Won't complain
That's where I'll stay
409
00:24:41,605 --> 00:24:44,191
Won't complain
That's where I'll stay
410
00:24:46,819 --> 00:24:48,529
Good plan this time, Alex.
411
00:24:48,612 --> 00:24:49,697
Why don't you shut up?
412
00:24:49,780 --> 00:24:52,616
All right,
my little patch of
Brussels sprouts.
413
00:24:52,700 --> 00:24:56,245
Uproot yourselves,
climb out the pool
and get some rest.
414
00:24:56,537 --> 00:24:58,330
You're gonna need it.
415
00:24:58,956 --> 00:25:03,627
Tomorrow, ladies,
we gonna start
the hard stuff.
416
00:25:04,795 --> 00:25:06,297
The hard stuff?
417
00:25:08,465 --> 00:25:10,884
PAYNE: Let's move it,
you turds!
418
00:25:10,968 --> 00:25:13,220
You'll get no sympathy from me!
419
00:25:13,304 --> 00:25:15,514
You want sympathy,
look in the dictionary
420
00:25:15,598 --> 00:25:17,808
between "shit"
and "syphilis!"
421
00:25:17,891 --> 00:25:20,102
That's where
you'll find
my sympathy!
422
00:25:20,185 --> 00:25:21,812
This ain't no walk in the park!
423
00:25:21,895 --> 00:25:24,189
Let's move it!
Hustle, hustle!
424
00:25:24,815 --> 00:25:25,899
Hey, Dumbo!
425
00:25:25,983 --> 00:25:29,653
You should be able
to fly through those tubes
with them big-ass ears, boy!
426
00:25:29,737 --> 00:25:32,031
Yeah, Dumbo!
Fly, baby, fly!
427
00:25:32,573 --> 00:25:34,074
Hey, Williams!
428
00:25:34,158 --> 00:25:36,910
You tell Marlee Matlin's son,
429
00:25:36,994 --> 00:25:39,913
if he don't get
across that rope,
I'm gonna hang him with it!
430
00:25:39,997 --> 00:25:41,040
He'll hang you with it!
431
00:25:41,123 --> 00:25:42,207
(LAUGHS)
432
00:25:42,291 --> 00:25:43,626
Heathcoat!
433
00:25:44,752 --> 00:25:48,005
You get your fat body
over that wall!
434
00:25:48,088 --> 00:25:50,007
Take your
fat pork chop body
over that...
435
00:25:50,090 --> 00:25:51,508
You shut up.
436
00:25:52,009 --> 00:25:57,431
Nobody's leaving here until
the average for this squad
is one minute, 20 seconds!
437
00:25:57,681 --> 00:25:59,808
Come on, he can't do it.
438
00:25:59,892 --> 00:26:03,187
Leave him alone.
I can barely do it.
439
00:26:03,520 --> 00:26:05,397
It's slippery out here.
440
00:26:05,522 --> 00:26:07,316
Slippery, he say.
441
00:26:07,399 --> 00:26:10,277
You think Charlie care
anything about slippery?
442
00:26:10,361 --> 00:26:13,030
Only thing he knows
is slit your throat.
443
00:26:13,113 --> 00:26:15,324
What if this was
a life-or-death
situation?
444
00:26:15,407 --> 00:26:18,035
But it's not
a life-or-death
situation.
445
00:26:19,370 --> 00:26:20,621
It is now.
446
00:26:20,704 --> 00:26:21,747
(ALL SCREAMING)
447
00:26:21,830 --> 00:26:23,415
One Mississippi.
448
00:26:24,041 --> 00:26:25,542
Two Mississippi.
449
00:26:25,751 --> 00:26:28,337
STONE: Come on, guys!
What are you, crazy?
450
00:26:28,420 --> 00:26:30,756
It's just a dummy grenade.
451
00:26:35,928 --> 00:26:37,054
Damn!
452
00:26:42,810 --> 00:26:44,561
Who's the dummy now?
453
00:26:47,940 --> 00:26:49,566
STONE:
So what is it, exactly?
454
00:26:49,650 --> 00:26:50,943
Concentrated dithiazanine.
455
00:26:51,026 --> 00:26:52,361
What the hell is that?
456
00:26:52,444 --> 00:26:54,113
It's like a super laxative.
457
00:26:54,196 --> 00:26:58,033
This here will pack
enough punch to take out
an entire football team.
458
00:26:58,117 --> 00:27:00,244
Payne will never
get off the can.
459
00:27:00,327 --> 00:27:03,706
He'll be making
beef stool
till graduation.
460
00:27:03,789 --> 00:27:05,040
HEATHCOAT: Yeah.
Nice.
461
00:27:05,124 --> 00:27:07,501
Payne will never know
what hit him.
462
00:27:14,425 --> 00:27:15,634
(EXCLAIMS)
463
00:27:31,984 --> 00:27:33,610
Major Payne, sir?
464
00:27:35,154 --> 00:27:37,406
You see I'm eating, turd?
465
00:27:38,282 --> 00:27:40,409
There's a call for you, sir.
466
00:28:18,989 --> 00:28:20,991
He's coming!
He's coming!
467
00:29:02,366 --> 00:29:03,742
(EXCLAIMING)
468
00:29:14,837 --> 00:29:16,463
(STOMACH GURGLES)
469
00:29:20,425 --> 00:29:21,927
(GURGLES)
470
00:29:36,149 --> 00:29:37,234
Hmm.
471
00:29:51,748 --> 00:29:53,000
(FARTS)
472
00:30:00,799 --> 00:30:02,009
PAYNE:
Ready on the right!
473
00:30:02,092 --> 00:30:03,893
WILLIAMS: Damn, G.
He nearly
put you in a coma.
474
00:30:03,927 --> 00:30:04,970
Ready on the left!
475
00:30:05,053 --> 00:30:06,263
It can't be legal the way
he's been treating us.
476
00:30:06,346 --> 00:30:07,514
Ready on the firing range!
477
00:30:07,598 --> 00:30:09,518
Turds, commence firing!
Let's just tell Phillips.
478
00:30:09,558 --> 00:30:12,769
(GUNSHOTS)
No, no. That senile old fool
ain't gonna help us.
479
00:30:12,853 --> 00:30:15,230
What the hell is that?
What kind of shooting
is that?
480
00:30:15,314 --> 00:30:17,149
Hey! Hey, dummy!
481
00:30:17,232 --> 00:30:19,860
What's the matter?
You can't
see, either?
482
00:30:19,943 --> 00:30:21,403
We gotta get rid of
that son of a bitch.
483
00:30:21,486 --> 00:30:23,614
PAYNE: You gaggle
of maggots couldn't hit
a bull in the ass
484
00:30:23,697 --> 00:30:24,948
with a baseball bat!
485
00:30:25,032 --> 00:30:29,494
Listen, we're gonna have
to prove that Payne
did something so vile,
486
00:30:30,537 --> 00:30:31,955
so perverse,
487
00:30:33,457 --> 00:30:35,208
so disgusting
488
00:30:37,419 --> 00:30:40,589
that Phillips
will have no choice
but to fire him.
489
00:30:45,636 --> 00:30:46,970
Like what?
490
00:30:51,308 --> 00:30:52,476
Why me?
491
00:30:52,643 --> 00:30:54,978
Because you have
got the biggest tits.
492
00:30:55,270 --> 00:30:56,897
(ALL GUFFAWING)
493
00:30:56,980 --> 00:30:58,315
(SHUSHING)
494
00:31:02,235 --> 00:31:03,612
Why not Wuliger?
495
00:31:03,695 --> 00:31:05,739
'Cause Wuliger's
gotta take
the pictures.
496
00:31:08,909 --> 00:31:10,827
(SNORING)
497
00:31:22,547 --> 00:31:25,384
Look, it's been
four hours.
He hasn't blinked.
498
00:31:25,467 --> 00:31:27,594
I'm telling you, these
Special Forces guys
499
00:31:27,678 --> 00:31:29,888
can sleep with their eyes open.
500
00:31:30,180 --> 00:31:31,431
Trust me.
501
00:31:34,059 --> 00:31:36,311
What happened
to the other dress?
502
00:31:36,395 --> 00:31:38,021
This one's prettier.
503
00:31:38,188 --> 00:31:39,815
(SNICKERS) Shut up, Bryan!
504
00:31:39,898 --> 00:31:41,358
Shh! Come on.
505
00:31:41,900 --> 00:31:43,360
Williams, go.
506
00:31:48,615 --> 00:31:52,160
WILLIAMS: Man,
you sure about this?
He looks awake to me.
507
00:31:53,203 --> 00:31:55,038
No, I checked on that.
508
00:31:56,707 --> 00:31:57,833
STONE: Watch this.
509
00:31:57,916 --> 00:32:00,627
Yo, turd sniffer.
Maggot face.
510
00:32:00,877 --> 00:32:03,005
See? He's dead
to the world.
511
00:32:03,588 --> 00:32:04,756
Let's go.
512
00:32:13,181 --> 00:32:14,266
(SOFTLY) Get in.
513
00:32:14,349 --> 00:32:16,643
Can't I just stand
beside the bed?
514
00:32:16,727 --> 00:32:18,061
Get in.
515
00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:24,901
STONE: Get in.
516
00:32:30,323 --> 00:32:32,784
All right,
now put your head
on his shoulder.
517
00:32:32,868 --> 00:32:34,327
Are you crazy?
518
00:32:34,411 --> 00:32:35,579
Do it.
519
00:32:38,915 --> 00:32:40,083
Closer.
520
00:32:42,878 --> 00:32:43,962
Closer.
521
00:32:46,131 --> 00:32:48,759
Now put your arm around him.
522
00:32:51,845 --> 00:32:53,513
Good. Now hold it.
523
00:32:53,638 --> 00:32:55,932
Hold it. Okay.
524
00:33:04,900 --> 00:33:06,443
Hello, Betty.
525
00:33:06,526 --> 00:33:07,819
(SCREAMING)
526
00:33:07,903 --> 00:33:09,780
(ALL SCREAMING)
527
00:33:17,037 --> 00:33:19,831
PAYNE: (SINGING)
Got no worry
Got no stress
528
00:33:19,915 --> 00:33:22,584
CADETS: (SINGING)
Got no worry
Got no stress
529
00:33:22,667 --> 00:33:25,587
'Cause we feel good
in our dress
530
00:33:25,670 --> 00:33:28,590
'Cause we feel good
in our dress
531
00:33:28,673 --> 00:33:31,426
Major Payne's a major dis
532
00:33:31,510 --> 00:33:34,304
Major Payne's a major dis
533
00:33:34,387 --> 00:33:37,057
Makes us squat when we piss
534
00:33:37,140 --> 00:33:40,060
He makes us squat when we piss
535
00:33:40,143 --> 00:33:42,854
Got no worries Got no care
536
00:33:42,979 --> 00:33:45,524
(LAUGHING)
Got no worries
Got no care
537
00:33:45,607 --> 00:33:48,235
I'm a bald-headed
son of a bitch
without hair
538
00:33:48,318 --> 00:33:51,446
I'm a bald-headed
son of a bitch
without hair
539
00:33:51,530 --> 00:33:54,241
Used to be Samson Now I'm Ann
540
00:33:54,324 --> 00:33:56,785
Used to be Samson Now I'm Ann
541
00:33:56,868 --> 00:33:59,412
Gotta earn my right
to be called a man
542
00:33:59,496 --> 00:34:02,415
Gotta earn my right
to be called a man
543
00:34:02,499 --> 00:34:07,254
I'll tell you, ladies,
you're the purtiest unit
ever underneath my command!
544
00:34:07,754 --> 00:34:10,632
Maybe I'll have
to change my name
to Pimp Daddy Payne!
545
00:34:10,715 --> 00:34:11,758
(STUDENTS LAUGHING)
546
00:34:11,842 --> 00:34:12,968
(CHUCKLING)
547
00:34:13,051 --> 00:34:14,511
EMILY: Major!
548
00:34:16,930 --> 00:34:19,266
What are the boys doing
in those dresses?
549
00:34:19,349 --> 00:34:21,560
They putting on a fashion show.
550
00:34:27,440 --> 00:34:31,862
I thought we had a little
talk about this kind of
negative reinforcement.
551
00:34:32,320 --> 00:34:34,906
Weren't you going
to be my big helper?
552
00:34:36,116 --> 00:34:38,160
Yeah, but they started it.
553
00:34:38,326 --> 00:34:39,995
Well, I'm stopping it.
554
00:34:40,203 --> 00:34:41,872
Don't touch my whistle.
555
00:34:41,955 --> 00:34:43,582
But I was just gonna...
556
00:34:43,665 --> 00:34:45,667
Don't touch the whistle.
557
00:34:49,004 --> 00:34:50,881
All right, ladies!
558
00:34:50,964 --> 00:34:53,216
Take off those dresses.
Head to your barracks.
559
00:34:53,300 --> 00:34:54,551
Fold 'em up neatly.
560
00:34:54,634 --> 00:34:55,886
Let's move it.
561
00:34:58,096 --> 00:34:59,222
BOY: You should
shave your legs more.
562
00:34:59,306 --> 00:35:00,390
Shut up!
563
00:35:01,224 --> 00:35:03,059
Good day, Miss Walburn.
564
00:35:05,187 --> 00:35:06,730
Do you really think
that this approach
565
00:35:06,813 --> 00:35:09,900
is the best way
to gain the trust
of these boys?
566
00:35:10,066 --> 00:35:12,903
They may not like me,
but they
will respect me.
567
00:35:12,986 --> 00:35:14,863
Let me be more direct.
568
00:35:15,572 --> 00:35:16,656
They hate you.
569
00:35:16,740 --> 00:35:20,076
Good. It'll draw them
close together,
make 'em a team.
570
00:35:21,411 --> 00:35:23,121
That's a very cynical plan.
571
00:35:23,205 --> 00:35:25,582
Yeah, but it won't backfire.
572
00:35:26,208 --> 00:35:27,292
Here.
573
00:35:27,375 --> 00:35:30,670
I would like you to
consider
an alternative approach.
574
00:35:31,087 --> 00:35:33,215
I want you to have this book.
575
00:35:33,340 --> 00:35:35,634
Read it.
Apply it.
576
00:35:37,719 --> 00:35:41,514
The ABC's of the Loving
Male Role Model.
577
00:35:41,598 --> 00:35:43,266
I don't need your book.
578
00:35:43,350 --> 00:35:44,893
Take it.
I don't want it.
579
00:35:44,976 --> 00:35:46,937
Take it.
I don't want it.
580
00:35:47,020 --> 00:35:48,521
Please, Major?
581
00:35:55,195 --> 00:35:56,279
Okay.
582
00:36:04,162 --> 00:36:05,413
(GROANS)
583
00:36:06,915 --> 00:36:08,833
(STUDENTS LAUGHING)
584
00:36:09,793 --> 00:36:11,002
Shut up.
585
00:36:12,170 --> 00:36:13,880
All right, I got
a sure-fire plan
586
00:36:13,964 --> 00:36:15,382
to get rid of
that son of a bitch.
587
00:36:15,465 --> 00:36:17,092
What is it?
What? What?
588
00:36:17,175 --> 00:36:18,927
It's gonna cost us.
589
00:36:19,302 --> 00:36:20,720
How much you got?
20.
590
00:36:20,804 --> 00:36:21,888
I got 25.
591
00:36:21,972 --> 00:36:23,431
Put me down for 40.
592
00:36:23,556 --> 00:36:25,475
All right, Dotson!
Yeah!
593
00:36:25,642 --> 00:36:26,851
(ALL CLAMORING)
594
00:36:26,935 --> 00:36:28,520
Okay. All right.
All right.
595
00:36:28,603 --> 00:36:29,980
We're taking out
Payne tomorrow!
596
00:36:30,063 --> 00:36:31,398
ALL: Yeah!
597
00:36:35,318 --> 00:36:37,654
"Love is the key"
598
00:36:37,737 --> 00:36:39,489
"to understanding."
599
00:36:54,421 --> 00:36:56,006
"The Three Bees."
600
00:36:57,007 --> 00:36:58,842
"Bee a good listener."
601
00:36:59,426 --> 00:37:01,845
"Bee sensitive
to their needs."
602
00:37:04,264 --> 00:37:06,224
Oh, hello, Miss Walburn.
603
00:37:07,225 --> 00:37:08,476
I just came by to let you know
604
00:37:08,560 --> 00:37:10,729
that Wuliger has
a slight temperature,
605
00:37:10,812 --> 00:37:13,982
so you might not
want to torture him
this evening.
606
00:37:16,401 --> 00:37:19,195
I will be sensitive
607
00:37:19,738 --> 00:37:21,197
to his needs.
608
00:37:23,199 --> 00:37:25,410
Have you been reading the book?
609
00:37:26,202 --> 00:37:29,205
Well, I might have
glanced at it
once or twice.
610
00:37:29,497 --> 00:37:32,500
Oh, well, that's very good!
I'm very proud of you, Major.
611
00:37:32,667 --> 00:37:33,710
(GASPS) Oh, shucks.
612
00:37:33,793 --> 00:37:36,004
It ain't hard being sensitive.
613
00:37:36,254 --> 00:37:38,131
He's back! He's back!
614
00:37:38,214 --> 00:37:39,466
Who's back?
615
00:37:39,549 --> 00:37:41,801
The man who lives in my closet.
616
00:37:41,968 --> 00:37:43,303
Oh, boy, get on out of here
617
00:37:43,386 --> 00:37:46,931
with that "I'm scared
of the dark" crap.
Go on, now. Get!
618
00:37:47,474 --> 00:37:48,808
Sensitive.
619
00:37:54,564 --> 00:37:57,776
Sensitive. Sensitive.
620
00:38:00,153 --> 00:38:04,366
Hello, there, fella.
You know,
what you're having,
621
00:38:04,699 --> 00:38:06,659
it's called a nightmare.
622
00:38:06,743 --> 00:38:09,079
Do you know
what a nightmare is?
623
00:38:09,871 --> 00:38:11,831
Well, that's all this is.
624
00:38:13,083 --> 00:38:15,377
Why don't you run on
back to your room
625
00:38:15,460 --> 00:38:18,505
before that man jump
out the closet and chop
your little head off.
626
00:38:18,588 --> 00:38:19,631
(GASPS)
627
00:38:19,714 --> 00:38:20,924
(CRYING)
628
00:38:24,260 --> 00:38:26,137
Sensitive.
629
00:38:27,514 --> 00:38:29,808
You call that being sensitive?
630
00:38:30,558 --> 00:38:33,353
Let me give you
a little history
on Kevin Dunne.
631
00:38:33,436 --> 00:38:35,814
Both of his parents are dead.
632
00:38:35,897 --> 00:38:38,483
Car accident, 1989.
633
00:38:38,566 --> 00:38:41,361
Lived in
the Chelsea Orphanage
till 1991
634
00:38:41,444 --> 00:38:42,779
when the school adopted him.
635
00:38:42,862 --> 00:38:44,781
I know all about it.
636
00:38:44,864 --> 00:38:48,827
Well, then you should also
know that the last thing
he needs right now
637
00:38:48,910 --> 00:38:52,580
is a sadistic father figure
scaring the life out of him.
638
00:38:54,290 --> 00:38:58,837
Maybe what he need
is for you to pop
your titty out his mouth
639
00:38:58,920 --> 00:39:00,880
and let the boy grow up.
640
00:39:02,632 --> 00:39:05,760
Excuse me?
What did you say?
641
00:39:05,844 --> 00:39:07,887
I didn't stutter.
642
00:39:08,304 --> 00:39:13,560
I said
pop your titty
out his mouth
643
00:39:13,643 --> 00:39:16,563
and stop babying him!
644
00:39:16,646 --> 00:39:20,150
I don't call it babying.
I call it nurturing.
645
00:39:20,650 --> 00:39:23,486
And I call it neutering.
646
00:39:24,154 --> 00:39:26,614
And I call you an insecure,
647
00:39:26,698 --> 00:39:29,409
overbearing, psychopathic,
dictatorial, egomaniacal,
648
00:39:29,492 --> 00:39:31,494
frigid lunatic asshole!
649
00:39:33,746 --> 00:39:35,290
I ain't frigid.
650
00:39:36,458 --> 00:39:38,084
He's still there!
651
00:39:41,212 --> 00:39:43,173
You wanna see nurturing?
652
00:39:56,060 --> 00:39:57,562
He's in there?
653
00:40:01,316 --> 00:40:02,567
(GASPING)
654
00:40:04,652 --> 00:40:07,113
If he's still in there,
he ain't happy.
655
00:40:07,197 --> 00:40:08,573
What was that?
656
00:40:08,656 --> 00:40:13,495
Major Payne just
terminated that bad man
with extreme prejudice!
657
00:40:14,412 --> 00:40:17,207
And if he's
still in there,
he ain't happy!
658
00:40:20,877 --> 00:40:22,962
You run on back to bed.
659
00:40:23,087 --> 00:40:26,007
That bad man ain't
gonna bother you no more.
660
00:40:26,466 --> 00:40:28,259
Thank you, Major.
661
00:40:29,260 --> 00:40:30,887
I love you.
662
00:40:40,188 --> 00:40:43,066
What's your angle, boy?
You plotting on me?
663
00:40:43,149 --> 00:40:44,150
No, sir!
664
00:40:44,234 --> 00:40:46,486
Don't you know
I could snap your neck
in 20 different places?
665
00:40:46,569 --> 00:40:48,488
Major, Major!
It's okay!
666
00:40:48,613 --> 00:40:51,449
He's just trying
to show you
some affection!
667
00:40:54,744 --> 00:40:56,329
I don't like it.
668
00:40:57,372 --> 00:40:59,791
Make me feel all funny.
669
00:41:10,468 --> 00:41:11,844
(BOTH GASP)
670
00:41:12,178 --> 00:41:14,430
Good night, Miss Walburn.
671
00:41:14,514 --> 00:41:16,182
Good night, Major.
672
00:41:28,820 --> 00:41:29,862
Where is he?
673
00:41:29,946 --> 00:41:31,656
He better get here.
674
00:41:32,407 --> 00:41:34,867
CADETS: Alex! Alex!
675
00:41:35,618 --> 00:41:36,786
(HONKS)
676
00:41:41,624 --> 00:41:42,917
WULIGER:
Alex, did you do it?
677
00:41:43,001 --> 00:41:44,627
How much did it cost?
678
00:41:44,711 --> 00:41:45,920
Where were you?
You really did it?
679
00:41:46,004 --> 00:41:47,255
I did it. I did it.
Sure.
680
00:41:47,338 --> 00:41:50,842
Squad! Atten-hut.
681
00:41:53,803 --> 00:41:56,222
Let's go, maggots.
Follow my lead!
682
00:41:56,389 --> 00:41:58,766
(SINGING)
Payne's not here
He's in our ass
683
00:41:58,850 --> 00:42:01,185
(SINGING)
Payne's not here
He's in our ass
684
00:42:01,269 --> 00:42:03,396
Butt's so tight
He can't pass gas
685
00:42:03,479 --> 00:42:05,565
Butt's so tight
He can't pass gas
686
00:42:05,648 --> 00:42:06,774
Sound off
687
00:42:06,858 --> 00:42:07,900
One, two
688
00:42:07,984 --> 00:42:09,902
Sound off Three, four
689
00:42:09,986 --> 00:42:11,571
Break it on down
690
00:42:12,405 --> 00:42:13,990
Break it on down
691
00:42:14,490 --> 00:42:15,783
Break it on down
692
00:42:15,867 --> 00:42:17,619
(WILLIAMS LAUGHING)
693
00:42:20,622 --> 00:42:22,332
Break it on down...
694
00:42:25,001 --> 00:42:26,919
You like to rhyme, boy?
695
00:42:28,671 --> 00:42:31,507
What's your name?
Bushwick Bill?
696
00:42:31,591 --> 00:42:34,510
No, let me guess.
You Snoop Diggety Dogg.
697
00:42:35,428 --> 00:42:38,931
Turds, front leaning
rest position. Move!
698
00:42:39,015 --> 00:42:42,602
I'm going to teach you
how I rhyme
military style!
699
00:42:44,854 --> 00:42:45,855
One.
700
00:42:46,856 --> 00:42:48,650
Don't you feel dumb?
701
00:42:49,359 --> 00:42:50,526
Two.
702
00:42:51,361 --> 00:42:53,196
Look at you.
703
00:42:53,821 --> 00:42:55,490
Three.
704
00:42:55,573 --> 00:42:58,910
Don't you ever make
no jokes about me
behind my back.
705
00:42:58,993 --> 00:43:01,829
Otherwise
I stomp you
in the ground!
706
00:43:02,163 --> 00:43:04,123
(MOTORCYCLE APPROACHING)
707
00:43:21,391 --> 00:43:23,184
All right, ladies...
708
00:43:24,936 --> 00:43:27,980
Hey, Dunne.
You missed
all the fun.
709
00:43:28,106 --> 00:43:30,400
(CHUCKLES)
That's another rhyme.
710
00:43:31,776 --> 00:43:34,028
PAYNE:
All right, we're heading
down to the field...
711
00:43:34,112 --> 00:43:35,154
There he is.
712
00:43:35,238 --> 00:43:37,115
For two hours of weapons drill.
713
00:43:37,198 --> 00:43:38,950
Yo, Payne!
714
00:43:44,247 --> 00:43:45,707
You Payne?
715
00:43:46,416 --> 00:43:48,626
I got something to say to you.
716
00:43:50,253 --> 00:43:52,213
Fee, fie, foe, fum.
717
00:43:52,422 --> 00:43:54,841
What beanstalk you fall from?
718
00:44:08,771 --> 00:44:12,024
You know, I heard
you've been giving
these boys a hard time.
719
00:44:12,108 --> 00:44:16,821
In fact,
I heard you couldn't cut it
in a real man's military!
720
00:44:17,447 --> 00:44:20,158
I heard that it's time
for you to leave.
721
00:44:20,700 --> 00:44:21,993
Yeah.
722
00:44:23,119 --> 00:44:24,787
Know what I heard?
723
00:44:24,871 --> 00:44:28,833
I heard your mother
was so fat, she played
pool with the planets.
724
00:44:32,545 --> 00:44:33,629
Yes!
725
00:44:36,007 --> 00:44:38,259
You thinking about leaving yet?
726
00:44:40,762 --> 00:44:44,974
Well, actually, I think
the party just begun.
727
00:44:45,099 --> 00:44:46,601
(CHUCKLING)
728
00:44:48,895 --> 00:44:52,565
Now, what I'm gonna do
is take this right foot
729
00:44:52,648 --> 00:44:54,768
and I'm gonna put it
across the left side
of your face.
730
00:44:54,776 --> 00:44:57,653
Don't give me
that Billy Jack
bullshit!
731
00:44:57,820 --> 00:44:59,030
(GRUNTS)
732
00:45:03,993 --> 00:45:05,328
(GROANING)
733
00:45:05,787 --> 00:45:10,166
(GASPING)
You said you were gonna
hit me in the face.
734
00:45:10,666 --> 00:45:12,502
What, you calling me a liar?
735
00:45:15,379 --> 00:45:17,006
Ooh!
736
00:45:21,844 --> 00:45:24,263
Oh, children.
737
00:45:25,515 --> 00:45:29,227
Somebody's gonna answer
for this blood
from my lip.
738
00:45:30,436 --> 00:45:31,896
I want names.
739
00:45:32,688 --> 00:45:35,066
I wanna know who's responsible.
740
00:45:38,152 --> 00:45:40,488
Don't all run at once.
741
00:45:41,739 --> 00:45:44,367
I guess nobody's responsible.
742
00:45:44,659 --> 00:45:48,246
Guess I just had
that one coming.
743
00:45:49,539 --> 00:45:52,083
Well, you know
what y'all got coming?
744
00:45:53,042 --> 00:45:58,548
Seven 23-hour days
full of fun and adventure.
745
00:45:59,757 --> 00:46:03,302
I'm gonna make you boys strong.
746
00:46:04,387 --> 00:46:05,429
Sir.
747
00:46:06,931 --> 00:46:08,266
Yes, turd?
748
00:46:10,142 --> 00:46:12,228
It was me, sir.
I hired him.
749
00:46:12,353 --> 00:46:14,939
Well, that's one
death warrant signed.
750
00:46:15,648 --> 00:46:18,317
Do I have any more volunteers?
751
00:46:19,402 --> 00:46:22,071
What about you, brown nose?
752
00:46:22,655 --> 00:46:24,407
I acted alone, sir.
753
00:46:24,782 --> 00:46:28,077
The rest of the squad
was unaware
of my activities.
754
00:46:30,746 --> 00:46:33,583
That's a pretty bold
move there, Mr. Stone.
755
00:46:35,626 --> 00:46:38,379
What do you think
I ought to do with you?
756
00:46:39,171 --> 00:46:40,840
I don't know, sir.
757
00:46:42,675 --> 00:46:44,302
You don't know.
758
00:46:45,303 --> 00:46:48,097
I guess you should
probably expel me, sir.
759
00:46:48,931 --> 00:46:51,893
What, and send you
on a vacation?
760
00:46:53,269 --> 00:46:54,395
Dotson.
761
00:46:54,478 --> 00:46:55,521
Sir, yes, sir!
762
00:46:55,605 --> 00:46:58,107
You are no longer
the squad leader.
763
00:46:59,275 --> 00:47:03,237
Stone, you are now
cadet sergeant.
764
00:47:04,363 --> 00:47:07,408
If these men win the
Virginia Military Games,
765
00:47:07,491 --> 00:47:10,828
it'll be because
you have led them
to a victory.
766
00:47:11,871 --> 00:47:16,792
If they lose,
it'll be because
you failed them.
767
00:47:19,503 --> 00:47:21,297
I don't accept
that responsibility.
768
00:47:21,380 --> 00:47:23,716
It's not negotiable.
769
00:47:29,472 --> 00:47:33,476
If I'm the new squad leader,
my first order is
to screw you, sir!
770
00:47:34,477 --> 00:47:36,562
What did you say to me, turd?
771
00:47:36,646 --> 00:47:39,857
Why don't you go
back to hell
where you came from?
772
00:47:41,442 --> 00:47:45,571
Boy, I am two seconds
from being on you
like white on rice
773
00:47:45,655 --> 00:47:48,616
and a glass of milk
on a paper plate
in a snowstorm!
774
00:47:48,699 --> 00:47:51,577
I will put my foot
so far up your ass,
775
00:47:51,661 --> 00:47:54,622
the water on my knee
will quench your thirst.
776
00:47:54,997 --> 00:47:56,207
Try it.
777
00:48:02,964 --> 00:48:04,840
You want me gone, boy?
778
00:48:05,424 --> 00:48:06,926
Yes, sir.
779
00:48:07,009 --> 00:48:10,054
I said, do you
want me gone, soldier?
780
00:48:10,137 --> 00:48:11,889
Yes, sir!
781
00:48:12,556 --> 00:48:17,061
Then you meet me outside
the ROTC building
at 2100 hours.
782
00:48:18,187 --> 00:48:22,358
You ladies want me gone,
you'll get your chance.
783
00:48:45,715 --> 00:48:50,761
Where is the first-place
trophy from the Virginia
Military Games?
784
00:48:50,845 --> 00:48:53,055
ALL: Wellington Academy, sir.
785
00:48:54,181 --> 00:48:57,226
I want that trophy.
786
00:48:57,476 --> 00:49:00,855
If you turds can
bring me that trophy,
787
00:49:00,938 --> 00:49:03,482
I will resign my command.
788
00:49:04,316 --> 00:49:06,944
This is a black op, gentlemen.
789
00:49:07,028 --> 00:49:11,699
If you are discovered,
I will deny all knowledge,
790
00:49:11,782 --> 00:49:14,410
and you will pay the price.
791
00:49:15,661 --> 00:49:18,080
That is my deal.
792
00:49:19,498 --> 00:49:21,375
Do you accept it?
793
00:49:25,504 --> 00:49:28,507
Sir, yes, sir.
794
00:49:29,967 --> 00:49:32,470
Then bring me my trophy.
795
00:49:49,779 --> 00:49:51,238
STONE:
All right, guys,
this is it.
796
00:49:51,322 --> 00:49:53,324
This is our big chance
to get rid of Payne.
797
00:49:53,407 --> 00:49:55,034
We got two miles
to get to Wellington.
798
00:49:55,117 --> 00:49:57,536
Now let's get it
out of there
as fast as we can.
799
00:49:57,620 --> 00:49:59,538
Let's hustle.
Move it! Let's go!
800
00:49:59,622 --> 00:50:01,248
Go, go, go!
801
00:50:01,624 --> 00:50:03,876
This is your
last chance,
Dotson.
802
00:50:03,959 --> 00:50:06,754
What, you think
I'm gonna come and help
you make me look bad?
803
00:50:06,837 --> 00:50:08,047
Anyway, I've called my dad.
804
00:50:08,130 --> 00:50:10,341
I'm leaving this stupid school.
805
00:50:11,092 --> 00:50:12,968
Bye. Have a good time.
806
00:50:15,137 --> 00:50:16,222
Where you going?
807
00:50:16,305 --> 00:50:17,681
I'm going on a black op.
808
00:50:17,765 --> 00:50:20,434
No, no, no.
You can't come.
You're too little.
809
00:50:20,518 --> 00:50:23,979
Why don't you stay back here
and guard the base, okay?
810
00:50:26,065 --> 00:50:27,566
(DOOR CLOSING)
811
00:50:34,824 --> 00:50:36,450
(TIGER CRYING)
812
00:50:45,835 --> 00:50:48,129
What's the matter
with you, boy?
813
00:50:48,295 --> 00:50:52,216
They won't let me
go on no black op.
They say I'm too little,
814
00:50:52,299 --> 00:50:56,011
and no one ever
lets you do anything
when you're too little.
815
00:50:56,178 --> 00:50:57,513
Ah, phooey.
816
00:50:58,222 --> 00:51:01,976
What about all those stories
about the little people
that do big things?
817
00:51:02,059 --> 00:51:05,521
Like Little Red Riding Hood,
them three little pigs,
818
00:51:06,063 --> 00:51:09,066
Spike Lee
or them Little Rascals.
819
00:51:09,859 --> 00:51:13,571
You ever hear the story
about the
Little Engine That Could?
820
00:51:16,615 --> 00:51:18,659
Let me tell you that story.
821
00:51:23,664 --> 00:51:25,499
Once upon a time,
822
00:51:26,167 --> 00:51:28,294
deep, deep in the jungle,
823
00:51:28,377 --> 00:51:30,921
there was a Little
Engine That Could.
824
00:51:31,380 --> 00:51:34,550
And he was
chugging his way
across the enemy line.
825
00:51:34,633 --> 00:51:35,968
(CHUGGING)
826
00:51:37,094 --> 00:51:38,554
Toot, toot.
827
00:51:39,555 --> 00:51:41,432
This Little Engine's mission
828
00:51:41,557 --> 00:51:45,769
was to take some AK-47s
and a nuclear payload
829
00:51:45,853 --> 00:51:49,106
over the mountain
to the 2063 Battalion.
830
00:51:49,690 --> 00:51:54,403
Needless to say,
there was
plenty opposition.
831
00:51:55,070 --> 00:51:57,656
You think that stopped
the Little Engine
That Could?
832
00:51:57,740 --> 00:52:00,910
No, siree, Bob.
He just kept
chugging along.
833
00:52:01,243 --> 00:52:02,870
(PAYNE CHUGGING)
834
00:52:04,538 --> 00:52:06,415
Toot, toot.
835
00:52:07,291 --> 00:52:09,210
Not even when
they climbed
aboard the train
836
00:52:09,293 --> 00:52:11,837
and popped out the eyes
of the conductor,
837
00:52:11,921 --> 00:52:15,257
and blood and snot
was dripping out
his eye sockets.
838
00:52:15,507 --> 00:52:18,761
You think that stopped
the Little Engine
That Could?
839
00:52:19,345 --> 00:52:22,973
Damn skippy.
He just kept
chugging along.
840
00:52:23,432 --> 00:52:24,725
(CHUGGING)
841
00:52:26,143 --> 00:52:27,811
Toot, toot.
842
00:52:30,189 --> 00:52:34,860
It wasn't until
Charlie rigged a bridge
with plastic explosives
843
00:52:36,111 --> 00:52:40,324
just as the Little Engine
was making his way
across the trestle.
844
00:52:41,283 --> 00:52:42,326
Boom!
845
00:52:42,409 --> 00:52:44,203
An explosion happened.
846
00:52:44,286 --> 00:52:47,539
Blood and guts and spit
and ass was everywhere.
847
00:52:47,873 --> 00:52:50,668
And Bubba come crawling
out the back door,
848
00:52:51,502 --> 00:52:53,128
both legs missing.
849
00:52:53,837 --> 00:52:56,465
Lula May's baby boy!
850
00:52:56,966 --> 00:52:59,343
He look up at me.
He said, "Payne!"
851
00:53:01,262 --> 00:53:04,056
"I can't feel my legs."
852
00:53:04,640 --> 00:53:07,476
I said, "Bubba,
they ain't there."
853
00:53:08,394 --> 00:53:10,187
And I looked down,
854
00:53:10,271 --> 00:53:14,275
and them little bloody nubs
was kicking real fast,
like this here.
855
00:53:14,358 --> 00:53:18,696
And I said,
"Bubba, it's 30 miles
to the nearest town.
856
00:53:18,779 --> 00:53:21,448
"Unless you can flip
upside down and
walk on your hands,"
857
00:53:21,532 --> 00:53:23,575
"you ain't gonna make it."
858
00:53:23,909 --> 00:53:27,496
All of a sudden, Charlie
was all over the place.
859
00:53:27,830 --> 00:53:30,165
It was just me and my sidearm.
860
00:53:30,582 --> 00:53:33,669
And I had no other alternative
861
00:53:34,169 --> 00:53:36,880
but to blast my way out.
862
00:53:37,631 --> 00:53:38,757
(SCREAMS)
863
00:53:38,841 --> 00:53:40,134
(SCREAMS)
864
00:53:40,592 --> 00:53:42,261
"Die, pig! Die!"
865
00:53:42,344 --> 00:53:46,015
"You'll never take
Major Benson Winifred
Payne alive!"
866
00:53:46,098 --> 00:53:48,934
Bam!
"I saw what you did
to my friend!"
867
00:53:49,018 --> 00:53:50,769
Bam! Bam!
Major! Major! Major!
868
00:53:50,853 --> 00:53:52,187
Bam! Bam!
869
00:53:55,357 --> 00:53:57,151
Hello, Miss Walburn.
870
00:53:57,776 --> 00:54:00,404
You just missed
a little bedtime story.
871
00:54:01,905 --> 00:54:03,991
No. I didn't, actually.
872
00:54:05,743 --> 00:54:09,496
In fact, I'd love
to talk to you
about that story.
873
00:54:11,040 --> 00:54:12,791
Perhaps over dinner?
874
00:54:16,420 --> 00:54:17,546
Okay.
875
00:54:19,214 --> 00:54:21,091
Okay.
I'll go get ready.
876
00:54:21,592 --> 00:54:22,843
Me too.
877
00:54:22,926 --> 00:54:24,053
Okay.
878
00:54:24,136 --> 00:54:25,387
Okay.
879
00:54:26,388 --> 00:54:27,473
Okay.
880
00:54:27,556 --> 00:54:29,558
(CHUCKLES)
All right. Bye.
881
00:54:32,394 --> 00:54:34,021
To be continued.
882
00:54:34,229 --> 00:54:37,649
When I come back,
I'll tell you what
Bubba used as a penis.
883
00:54:37,733 --> 00:54:39,068
(EXCLAIMS IN DISGUST)
884
00:54:42,237 --> 00:54:44,073
(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)
885
00:55:34,665 --> 00:55:36,708
Well, ain't you gonna eat?
886
00:55:37,459 --> 00:55:41,004
I think I'll wait a moment.
My stomach's a little upset.
887
00:55:41,839 --> 00:55:44,800
(CHUCKLES)
Them some mighty
fine vittles.
888
00:55:44,883 --> 00:55:47,010
Wouldn't let 'em go to waste.
889
00:55:48,887 --> 00:55:51,974
You know, I think
you're really making
some wonderful strides
890
00:55:52,057 --> 00:55:54,977
with the way
you're dealing
with the children.
891
00:55:55,727 --> 00:55:59,982
That was almost a really
good thing you tried to do
for Tiger tonight.
892
00:56:01,358 --> 00:56:03,444
May I make a suggestion?
893
00:56:05,821 --> 00:56:07,072
Proceed.
894
00:56:08,907 --> 00:56:11,410
Well, your story,
while colorful,
895
00:56:12,953 --> 00:56:14,621
was a bit rough.
896
00:56:16,790 --> 00:56:18,667
You mean the explosion?
897
00:56:19,793 --> 00:56:23,505
Yes. And the
eye-gouging part.
898
00:56:24,798 --> 00:56:26,842
You need to loosen up.
899
00:56:27,426 --> 00:56:29,720
Not everything
can be about war.
900
00:56:33,015 --> 00:56:35,225
What do you like to do for fun?
901
00:56:40,063 --> 00:56:42,649
I like to hang
upside down blindfolded,
902
00:56:42,733 --> 00:56:45,569
and then I take my gun apart
and I put it back
together real fast
903
00:56:45,652 --> 00:56:47,863
before my nose starts to bleed.
904
00:56:50,866 --> 00:56:52,618
Well, that's great.
905
00:56:54,495 --> 00:56:58,123
But is there anything
that you like that doesn't
have to do with battle?
906
00:56:58,207 --> 00:56:59,750
Like what?
907
00:56:59,833 --> 00:57:01,168
Like golf.
908
00:57:02,377 --> 00:57:03,712
Negative.
909
00:57:05,047 --> 00:57:07,466
Well, do you like
to go to the movies?
910
00:57:08,842 --> 00:57:10,219
Negative.
911
00:57:17,059 --> 00:57:19,102
I don't suppose you dance.
912
00:57:23,273 --> 00:57:27,069
I've been known
to cut a little rug
in my day.
913
00:57:42,626 --> 00:57:44,586
Ain't you gonna dance?
914
00:57:45,212 --> 00:57:46,421
Benson.
915
00:57:52,553 --> 00:57:53,762
Benson,
916
00:57:54,096 --> 00:57:56,515
nobody does the robot anymore.
917
00:57:57,182 --> 00:58:00,852
Then I guess
I gotta dig further
into my repertoire.
918
00:58:01,603 --> 00:58:02,896
(CHUCKLES)
919
00:58:24,418 --> 00:58:25,794
(WHOOPING)
920
00:58:29,756 --> 00:58:31,133
(SCREAMING)
921
00:58:50,652 --> 00:58:52,321
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
922
00:59:12,591 --> 00:59:16,219
Williams, you take these
guys and fan out the left
flank of the school. Go!
923
00:59:16,303 --> 00:59:17,512
Got you.
924
00:59:18,221 --> 00:59:21,683
Wuliger, you take
these two and cover
the right. Got it?
925
00:59:21,767 --> 00:59:23,810
Got it.
All right, come on!
926
01:00:26,248 --> 01:00:27,958
(MAN CLEARS THROAT)
927
01:00:32,045 --> 01:00:33,630
Don't move.
928
01:00:40,804 --> 01:00:42,597
(STUDENTS CLAMORING)
929
01:00:53,108 --> 01:00:55,110
BOY 1:
Madison is a loser.
930
01:00:56,153 --> 01:00:57,696
(ALL CLAMORING)
931
01:01:03,994 --> 01:01:06,121
BOY 2:
Man, get in there.
932
01:01:19,301 --> 01:01:22,721
PAYNE: All right?
And then his
chest cavity exploded.
933
01:01:22,804 --> 01:01:23,889
Boom!
934
01:01:23,972 --> 01:01:25,766
(CHUCKLES)
935
01:01:25,849 --> 01:01:27,768
You know, that was
the first time
936
01:01:27,851 --> 01:01:31,062
I ever drove
a man's nose up
into his brain
937
01:01:31,146 --> 01:01:35,150
causing instant death
and simultaneous
bowel evacuation.
938
01:01:36,234 --> 01:01:39,154
But enough
about me, woman.
What's your story?
939
01:01:40,113 --> 01:01:43,241
I'm surprised
you ain't dropped
about 12 puppies by now.
940
01:01:43,325 --> 01:01:44,367
(CHUCKLES)
941
01:01:44,451 --> 01:01:46,578
Ain't you never been married?
942
01:01:47,329 --> 01:01:49,164
Yeah, I was.
943
01:01:49,331 --> 01:01:52,042
What happened?
You terminate
his command?
944
01:01:52,626 --> 01:01:54,836
No. Actually, he left.
945
01:01:56,505 --> 01:01:58,632
I wanted children.
He didn't.
946
01:02:00,509 --> 01:02:03,553
Any man that would
leave you ought
to be monkey stomped
947
01:02:03,637 --> 01:02:06,598
and have his brains
mailed back
to his mother.
948
01:02:06,681 --> 01:02:08,266
(LAUGHS)
949
01:02:08,433 --> 01:02:10,393
Well, thank you, Benson.
950
01:02:13,355 --> 01:02:14,940
How about you?
951
01:02:15,023 --> 01:02:17,484
Was there ever
a Mrs. Payne?
952
01:02:17,692 --> 01:02:18,944
Negative.
953
01:02:19,027 --> 01:02:21,655
I figure if the
Marines wanted me
to have a wife,
954
01:02:21,738 --> 01:02:23,073
they'd have issued me one.
955
01:02:23,156 --> 01:02:24,616
(CHUCKLES)
956
01:02:28,036 --> 01:02:29,496
Well,
957
01:02:30,539 --> 01:02:33,250
I had a really nice
time tonight, Benson.
958
01:02:33,708 --> 01:02:37,420
Heck, being with you
is almost better
than cleaning my gun.
959
01:02:41,299 --> 01:02:42,300
I got something for you.
960
01:02:42,384 --> 01:02:43,927
Oh, what is it?
961
01:02:44,302 --> 01:02:45,637
It's a bullet.
962
01:02:48,598 --> 01:02:50,517
It's something special.
963
01:02:51,518 --> 01:02:53,228
It's from my heart.
964
01:02:56,064 --> 01:02:58,567
Really? Well,
where'd you get it?
965
01:02:59,526 --> 01:03:00,485
From my heart.
966
01:03:00,569 --> 01:03:04,072
Left ventricle.
I took it out myself
with a field knife.
967
01:03:04,573 --> 01:03:06,700
And I want you to have that.
968
01:03:09,411 --> 01:03:11,079
Thank you, Benson.
969
01:03:29,055 --> 01:03:30,599
Good night.
970
01:03:34,269 --> 01:03:36,104
Good night, princess.
971
01:03:52,287 --> 01:03:54,456
Wee, doggie!
972
01:04:02,923 --> 01:04:04,382
(DOOR CLOSES)
973
01:04:05,342 --> 01:04:07,302
(WHISTLING)
974
01:04:17,270 --> 01:04:20,523
What the hell
are you doing
in my office?
975
01:04:21,650 --> 01:04:23,652
(CHUCKLES) It was a trap.
976
01:04:24,277 --> 01:04:25,779
You set us up.
977
01:04:26,237 --> 01:04:29,032
I might have made
a little anonymous call.
978
01:04:29,824 --> 01:04:33,495
You didn't think
they were just gonna
hand it to you, did you?
979
01:04:33,578 --> 01:04:36,665
We got the crap
kicked out of us
because of you.
980
01:04:37,332 --> 01:04:40,168
Tonight wasn't
about fair or unfair.
981
01:04:40,669 --> 01:04:43,254
It was about achieving
your objective.
982
01:04:45,131 --> 01:04:46,341
Did you?
983
01:04:47,258 --> 01:04:49,386
Did you even see that trophy?
984
01:04:50,845 --> 01:04:52,222
Oh, I saw it.
985
01:04:52,681 --> 01:04:56,184
And when you saw it,
did you want it?
986
01:04:56,810 --> 01:04:58,520
Yeah, to get rid of you.
987
01:04:58,603 --> 01:05:00,855
That's not what I asked.
988
01:05:01,439 --> 01:05:03,024
Did you want it?
989
01:05:04,109 --> 01:05:05,527
I wanted it.
990
01:05:05,860 --> 01:05:07,195
To own it?
991
01:05:07,570 --> 01:05:08,697
Yeah.
992
01:05:08,905 --> 01:05:10,532
Deserve it?
Yeah.
993
01:05:10,740 --> 01:05:12,617
To win it?
Oh, yeah.
994
01:05:12,826 --> 01:05:15,453
Then let's win it,
you bruised-up turd!
995
01:05:15,704 --> 01:05:18,957
If you really
want it, I'll show
you how to earn it.
996
01:05:24,921 --> 01:05:28,091
DR. PHILLIPS: (ON PA)
Welcome, parents,
to Madison School.
997
01:05:28,174 --> 01:05:33,179
For your convenience,
we will be announcing
activities throughout the day.
998
01:05:45,150 --> 01:05:47,402
WULIGER: Hey, Heathcoat,
your parents coming today?
999
01:05:47,485 --> 01:05:49,612
HEATHCOAT:
No, of course not.
1000
01:05:50,071 --> 01:05:51,156
WULIGER:
How about you, Williams?
1001
01:05:51,239 --> 01:05:53,450
WILLIAMS: What,
are you kidding?
Shut up.
1002
01:05:53,533 --> 01:05:57,579
WULIGER: My parents said
they'd come, but
I said I got allergies...
1003
01:05:59,914 --> 01:06:02,083
What the hell happened to you?
1004
01:06:04,461 --> 01:06:06,713
Me? Nothing.
I'm great.
1005
01:06:08,757 --> 01:06:10,258
Look at you, though.
1006
01:06:11,342 --> 01:06:13,386
Regular little soldier man.
1007
01:06:14,471 --> 01:06:16,222
You a hard ass now?
1008
01:06:17,307 --> 01:06:18,892
What are you doing here?
1009
01:06:18,975 --> 01:06:22,687
It's Parents Day,
and I am
your legal guardian.
1010
01:06:24,647 --> 01:06:25,899
You're drunk.
1011
01:06:25,982 --> 01:06:28,109
Don't you walk away from me.
1012
01:06:29,903 --> 01:06:30,945
Oh.
1013
01:06:33,698 --> 01:06:35,617
Give me a little salute.
1014
01:06:35,742 --> 01:06:37,744
I'm not gonna salute you.
1015
01:06:37,994 --> 01:06:39,996
You salute your superiors.
1016
01:06:40,246 --> 01:06:42,082
Or don't they teach
that around here?
1017
01:06:42,165 --> 01:06:43,833
What superior?
1018
01:06:43,917 --> 01:06:46,127
They kicked you out, remember?
1019
01:06:47,295 --> 01:06:49,714
Don't you sass me
like your mother.
1020
01:06:52,592 --> 01:06:54,969
You're mine now.
I own you,
1021
01:06:55,136 --> 01:06:57,138
and you will respect me.
1022
01:06:59,307 --> 01:07:00,975
Now you salute me.
1023
01:07:01,351 --> 01:07:02,393
No.
1024
01:07:03,812 --> 01:07:07,357
You hit that boy again,
I'm gonna do more
than salute you.
1025
01:07:07,482 --> 01:07:09,025
This is between me and my son.
1026
01:07:09,109 --> 01:07:10,235
Stepson.
1027
01:07:10,318 --> 01:07:12,987
Whoever he is,
he's on my time now.
1028
01:07:30,380 --> 01:07:32,048
Now I'm gonna ask you nicely.
1029
01:07:32,132 --> 01:07:34,634
Please return to your vehicle.
1030
01:07:37,554 --> 01:07:39,055
You go on now.
1031
01:08:01,661 --> 01:08:03,788
Go on back to your bunk, son.
1032
01:08:09,752 --> 01:08:11,379
Major Payne, sir.
1033
01:08:12,213 --> 01:08:13,339
Yeah.
1034
01:08:15,258 --> 01:08:17,385
I wanna get that trophy, sir.
1035
01:08:19,095 --> 01:08:20,471
Come again?
1036
01:08:20,889 --> 01:08:23,057
I wanna get that trophy, sir.
1037
01:08:23,474 --> 01:08:25,518
What, you want to steal it?
1038
01:08:25,768 --> 01:08:26,895
No, sir.
1039
01:08:26,978 --> 01:08:28,730
You want to win it?
1040
01:08:28,855 --> 01:08:30,732
I want to earn it, sir.
1041
01:08:32,692 --> 01:08:35,320
The rest of your men
feel the same way?
1042
01:08:38,615 --> 01:08:41,367
Meet me on the parade ground,
1700 hours.
1043
01:08:42,076 --> 01:08:43,745
We got work to do.
1044
01:08:44,537 --> 01:08:46,331
Squad, atten-hut!
1045
01:08:53,087 --> 01:08:54,672
(RESPECT PLAYING)
1046
01:08:54,756 --> 01:08:56,257
(ALL YELLING)
1047
01:09:18,571 --> 01:09:19,948
(CHUCKLING)
1048
01:09:36,464 --> 01:09:37,799
(GRUNTING)
1049
01:09:57,360 --> 01:10:00,154
Two. Three.
1050
01:10:00,905 --> 01:10:03,408
Four. Five.
1051
01:10:04,867 --> 01:10:05,952
Six.
1052
01:10:06,744 --> 01:10:07,912
Seven.
1053
01:10:08,496 --> 01:10:09,664
Eight.
1054
01:10:18,214 --> 01:10:20,925
Forty inches breast to back.
1055
01:11:00,173 --> 01:11:01,549
(INAUDIBLE)
1056
01:11:07,930 --> 01:11:09,599
(WHISTLE SOUNDING)
1057
01:11:26,574 --> 01:11:27,784
Squad!
1058
01:11:28,242 --> 01:11:29,827
Atten-hut!
1059
01:11:31,287 --> 01:11:33,539
Present arms!
1060
01:11:34,916 --> 01:11:37,460
Order arms!
1061
01:11:38,252 --> 01:11:40,588
Left face!
1062
01:11:43,591 --> 01:11:45,510
Right face!
1063
01:11:47,178 --> 01:11:49,472
Parade rest!
1064
01:11:54,185 --> 01:11:56,312
You're still a shit sandwich.
1065
01:11:57,480 --> 01:11:59,607
You're just not a soggy one.
1066
01:12:00,483 --> 01:12:03,444
From now on,
you are no longer turds.
1067
01:12:03,820 --> 01:12:06,864
You've graduated to maggots.
1068
01:12:07,657 --> 01:12:09,450
You're a family.
1069
01:12:09,784 --> 01:12:11,119
A team.
1070
01:12:11,869 --> 01:12:13,663
Let's win them Games.
1071
01:12:26,634 --> 01:12:27,760
Squad!
1072
01:12:27,844 --> 01:12:29,637
Atten-hut!
1073
01:12:30,805 --> 01:12:32,390
General on deck.
1074
01:12:40,982 --> 01:12:45,361
Major, I have news
so good I've decided to
deliver it personally.
1075
01:12:45,945 --> 01:12:47,613
America needs you.
1076
01:12:47,780 --> 01:12:51,784
There's a situation
in Bosnia that requires
your special services.
1077
01:12:52,034 --> 01:12:53,202
As of this moment,
1078
01:12:53,286 --> 01:12:56,080
you are reinstated
in the United States
Marines
1079
01:12:56,164 --> 01:12:57,915
at the rank of
Lieutenant Colonel.
1080
01:12:57,999 --> 01:12:59,542
Thank you, sir.
1081
01:12:59,834 --> 01:13:01,461
Congratulations.
1082
01:13:02,003 --> 01:13:03,754
Your unit
will be leaving
out of Washington.
1083
01:13:03,838 --> 01:13:06,841
You will arrive tomorrow
at 1600 for briefing.
1084
01:13:07,008 --> 01:13:08,885
Here are your tickets.
1085
01:13:11,345 --> 01:13:15,141
General, tomorrow
are the Military Games,
and I was hoping...
1086
01:13:15,224 --> 01:13:16,517
Games?
1087
01:13:16,601 --> 01:13:19,687
Payne, I fought
to get you reinstated.
1088
01:13:20,771 --> 01:13:22,857
You wanted in.
I got you in.
1089
01:13:23,608 --> 01:13:26,903
You don't take this,
there won't be
any more chances.
1090
01:13:33,701 --> 01:13:36,078
Sir, the Major
will be there, sir.
1091
01:13:36,704 --> 01:13:37,997
Good man.
1092
01:13:38,789 --> 01:13:40,833
I'll see you in Washington.
1093
01:14:01,270 --> 01:14:03,064
Hey, hey, hey, Major.
1094
01:14:03,314 --> 01:14:04,899
Where you going?
1095
01:14:05,274 --> 01:14:07,777
Back to killing.
You wanna come?
1096
01:14:09,445 --> 01:14:11,113
I didn't think so.
1097
01:14:12,573 --> 01:14:14,742
Go lead your men into victory.
1098
01:14:15,785 --> 01:14:18,746
Great. What happened
to unity and family
1099
01:14:18,829 --> 01:14:21,707
and all that other bullshit
that you taught us?
1100
01:14:21,791 --> 01:14:24,544
Hey, I never said
families
don't break up.
1101
01:14:25,419 --> 01:14:27,296
Don't you watch Oprah?
1102
01:14:48,484 --> 01:14:51,112
So it's true.
You're just gonna leave.
1103
01:14:57,285 --> 01:14:59,912
You know,
when they're
through with you,
1104
01:15:00,162 --> 01:15:02,790
they're just gonna
cut you loose again.
1105
01:15:03,416 --> 01:15:05,042
I asked to leave.
1106
01:15:05,668 --> 01:15:07,795
Them boys are making me soft.
1107
01:15:07,920 --> 01:15:09,922
Them boys need you.
1108
01:15:11,299 --> 01:15:13,718
All that hard work they did,
they did for you.
1109
01:15:13,801 --> 01:15:15,803
They did it for themselves.
1110
01:15:15,928 --> 01:15:17,138
Benson.
1111
01:15:17,305 --> 01:15:18,764
Look, woman.
1112
01:15:18,848 --> 01:15:21,517
I toured 11 separate
engagements.
1113
01:15:21,601 --> 01:15:22,560
I didn't do all that
1114
01:15:22,643 --> 01:15:26,480
to come back
and be conquered by no woman
and a bunch of kids.
1115
01:15:26,647 --> 01:15:29,692
What'd you really think
I was gonna do, marry you?
1116
01:15:29,775 --> 01:15:31,611
Put up a white picket fence?
1117
01:15:31,694 --> 01:15:34,655
Adopt Tiger and become
the loving male role model?
1118
01:15:34,739 --> 01:15:35,906
That's not me.
1119
01:15:35,990 --> 01:15:37,491
It's not Payne.
1120
01:15:37,575 --> 01:15:40,786
(I NEVER LOVED A MAN
(THE WAY I LOVE YOU) PLAYING)
1121
01:16:31,253 --> 01:16:34,548
I can't believe
he actually left.
1122
01:16:35,883 --> 01:16:37,885
Alex, where are you going?
1123
01:16:39,512 --> 01:16:41,055
To the Games.
1124
01:16:41,389 --> 01:16:44,684
You guys better start
getting ready. We gotta
be there in an hour.
1125
01:16:44,767 --> 01:16:47,770
We don't have
to go to the Games.
Payne's gone.
1126
01:16:48,896 --> 01:16:51,399
We don't have a chance
without Payne.
1127
01:16:51,565 --> 01:16:54,235
Listen.
Payne or no Payne,
1128
01:16:54,819 --> 01:16:58,030
I'm gonna go out there
and win that stupid trophy.
1129
01:16:58,114 --> 01:17:01,659
We busted our asses
off out there
getting ready for this.
1130
01:17:01,784 --> 01:17:05,371
Now I didn't go through
all that to come out
empty-handed.
1131
01:17:06,956 --> 01:17:08,833
So how about it, guys?
1132
01:17:09,667 --> 01:17:11,419
Aren't you with me?
1133
01:17:11,836 --> 01:17:13,587
Sure, I guess.
Yeah.
1134
01:17:14,588 --> 01:17:16,799
(IMITATING PAYNE)
I can't hear you.
1135
01:17:16,882 --> 01:17:18,926
ALL: Sir, yes, sir!
1136
01:17:19,176 --> 01:17:20,970
Just a little bit louder now.
1137
01:17:21,053 --> 01:17:23,222
Sir, yes, sir!
1138
01:17:23,305 --> 01:17:25,057
One more time, you maggots.
1139
01:17:25,141 --> 01:17:28,269
Sir, yes, sir!
1140
01:17:43,075 --> 01:17:45,786
BRAGGART: (ON PA)
Taggert, present arms.
1141
01:17:45,870 --> 01:17:48,080
Stapleton, present arms.
1142
01:17:51,208 --> 01:17:53,210
Wellington, present arms.
1143
01:17:58,758 --> 01:18:01,218
Madison, present arms.
1144
01:18:01,927 --> 01:18:04,638
Cadets, order arms.
1145
01:18:09,351 --> 01:18:11,812
Welcome, men,
to Wellington Academy
1146
01:18:11,896 --> 01:18:15,983
for the 58th annual
Junior ROTC Virginia
Military Games.
1147
01:18:16,650 --> 01:18:18,944
This morning,
you are all equal.
1148
01:18:19,737 --> 01:18:24,492
But by the end of the day
today, we will honor the
finest of you with a trophy,
1149
01:18:24,950 --> 01:18:26,952
the trophy of a champion.
1150
01:18:28,120 --> 01:18:29,872
Let the games begin.
1151
01:18:39,715 --> 01:18:42,051
Good shot, Williams.
I got nothing to say
to you.
1152
01:18:42,134 --> 01:18:44,178
All right, Fox.
Good going.
1153
01:18:44,887 --> 01:18:45,971
Yes!
1154
01:18:46,680 --> 01:18:47,681
(CROWD CHEERING)
1155
01:18:47,765 --> 01:18:50,851
STONE:
Come on, guys!
Maggots, pull!
1156
01:18:51,227 --> 01:18:52,728
(ALL GRUNTING)
1157
01:19:04,031 --> 01:19:06,033
STONE: Go, Tiger! Go! Go!
1158
01:19:36,897 --> 01:19:38,148
(MAN LAUGHING)
1159
01:19:38,232 --> 01:19:40,150
MAN: I got you!
I got you!
1160
01:19:40,234 --> 01:19:42,069
I got you now!
1161
01:20:01,213 --> 01:20:02,840
EMILY: Benson.
1162
01:20:15,603 --> 01:20:16,979
(INAUDIBLE)
1163
01:20:26,280 --> 01:20:27,823
(DOG BARKS)
1164
01:21:26,382 --> 01:21:28,300
(TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING)
1165
01:21:43,023 --> 01:21:45,401
On your mark.
Get set.
1166
01:21:45,693 --> 01:21:46,777
(GUN FIRES)
1167
01:21:46,860 --> 01:21:48,612
(AUDIENCE CHEERING)
1168
01:21:54,159 --> 01:21:55,285
One, sir. Two, sir.
1169
01:21:55,369 --> 01:21:58,288
Three, sir. Four, sir.
Five, sir. Six, sir.
1170
01:21:58,372 --> 01:21:59,415
Seven, sir.
1171
01:22:00,082 --> 01:22:01,667
Four, sir. Five, sir.
Six, sir...
1172
01:22:20,019 --> 01:22:23,105
STONE: Faster, Heathcoat.
Over the wall. Go! Go!
1173
01:22:24,273 --> 01:22:26,066
Come on, Heathcoat!
You can do it!
I know you can!
1174
01:22:26,150 --> 01:22:28,694
Come on!
Move it, Heathcoat.
Move it! Move it!
1175
01:22:28,819 --> 01:22:30,988
Come on, come on!
DOTSON:
See you later, loser.
1176
01:22:41,081 --> 01:22:42,416
GIRL: Hurry up!
1177
01:22:49,882 --> 01:22:51,216
(COUGHING)
1178
01:23:02,186 --> 01:23:03,437
(GROANS)
1179
01:23:06,023 --> 01:23:07,566
Hey, he just tripped him!
1180
01:23:07,649 --> 01:23:11,403
BRAGGART: The winner
of the relay race
is Wellington Academy.
1181
01:23:13,781 --> 01:23:16,408
Second place,
Madison Preparatory.
1182
01:23:17,242 --> 01:23:19,411
Third place, Stapleton.
1183
01:23:20,496 --> 01:23:22,372
Fourth place, Taggert.
1184
01:23:40,140 --> 01:23:41,642
(WHISTLE BLOWS)
1185
01:23:43,977 --> 01:23:46,313
SOLDIER: All right,
knock it off!
1186
01:23:48,357 --> 01:23:50,567
OFFICER: Hey, hey, hey,
get off of him!
1187
01:23:51,735 --> 01:23:54,863
Hold it right there!
Hey, hey, you! You!
1188
01:23:54,947 --> 01:23:57,074
SOLDIER:
Knock it off!
Knock it off!
1189
01:23:58,659 --> 01:23:59,993
I want that man arrested!
1190
01:24:04,623 --> 01:24:06,208
This is unsatisfactory.
1191
01:24:06,291 --> 01:24:10,963
I demand that the entire
Madison squad be disqualified
from the final competition!
1192
01:24:11,046 --> 01:24:15,342
Lieutenant, I can only
disqualify the cadet
who started the disturbance.
1193
01:24:15,425 --> 01:24:17,678
That's not enough!
Look at 'em!
1194
01:24:17,845 --> 01:24:21,348
These animals are so pathetic,
their own commander
didn't even bother to show up.
1195
01:24:23,433 --> 01:24:25,978
There ain't no need
for name-calling.
1196
01:24:41,535 --> 01:24:43,912
Major Payne.
What are you
doing here?
1197
01:24:43,996 --> 01:24:46,748
I was told you were on
an important assignment.
1198
01:24:46,832 --> 01:24:48,167
Well, what could be
more important
1199
01:24:48,250 --> 01:24:51,086
than my boys
winning this
here competition?
1200
01:24:51,211 --> 01:24:53,714
I suggest we get
this party started.
1201
01:24:54,089 --> 01:24:56,341
Is that okay with you, Colonel?
1202
01:24:59,553 --> 01:25:03,098
Cadets, I'm pleased
to announce the two
top-rated squads
1203
01:25:03,182 --> 01:25:06,768
who will compete for first
and second place in the
parade drill competition.
1204
01:25:06,852 --> 01:25:09,730
Wellington Academy
and Madison Academy.
1205
01:25:14,401 --> 01:25:16,236
Arms, hut!
1206
01:25:17,321 --> 01:25:18,405
Left face!
1207
01:25:18,488 --> 01:25:20,324
BRAGGART:
Ladies and gentlemen,
Wellington Academy.
1208
01:25:20,407 --> 01:25:21,450
Forward march!
1209
01:25:21,533 --> 01:25:23,202
Drill leader,
Sergeant Michael Rachmill.
1210
01:25:23,285 --> 01:25:24,745
Right. Right.
1211
01:25:27,414 --> 01:25:31,543
All right, gentlemen.
Let's look alive here!
We got trophies to win!
1212
01:25:32,628 --> 01:25:34,504
Hello,
Mr. Denial.
1213
01:25:35,255 --> 01:25:36,336
While you were on vacation,
1214
01:25:36,381 --> 01:25:39,092
we've been having
some real
problems here.
1215
01:25:39,259 --> 01:25:43,055
I don't see no problem.
You made it to the finals,
didn't you?
1216
01:25:43,430 --> 01:25:45,307
Yeah, no thanks to you.
1217
01:25:46,058 --> 01:25:48,977
So why did you come back?
We don't need you.
1218
01:25:50,938 --> 01:25:53,273
Maybe I didn't
come back for you.
1219
01:25:54,066 --> 01:25:56,026
Why'd you come back then?
1220
01:25:56,860 --> 01:26:00,155
Maybe I told myself
that I want to
see you win first place
1221
01:26:00,239 --> 01:26:02,658
and ain't gonna
leave until you do.
1222
01:26:04,076 --> 01:26:06,703
So that's it?
It's all about
the trophy?
1223
01:26:11,166 --> 01:26:13,543
Maybe I like you.
1224
01:26:15,128 --> 01:26:16,213
What?
1225
01:26:17,881 --> 01:26:19,216
Just like?
1226
01:26:21,468 --> 01:26:24,972
Maybe I like you a lot.
1227
01:26:26,348 --> 01:26:27,683
That's it?
1228
01:26:29,142 --> 01:26:31,812
Don't push the "maybe," baby.
1229
01:26:32,896 --> 01:26:34,898
Now let's win this thing.
1230
01:26:36,149 --> 01:26:37,901
We have nobody
to lead the drill.
1231
01:26:37,985 --> 01:26:39,403
'Course we do.
1232
01:26:39,486 --> 01:26:40,821
Who?
1233
01:26:40,988 --> 01:26:42,155
Tiger.
1234
01:26:42,781 --> 01:26:44,408
Are you crazy?
What?
1235
01:26:44,491 --> 01:26:45,450
That's right.
1236
01:26:45,534 --> 01:26:48,578
That boy know the drill
like the knob
on the back of his head.
1237
01:26:48,662 --> 01:26:51,123
I can't do it.
I'm too little.
1238
01:26:51,790 --> 01:26:53,166
BRAGGART:
Ladies and gentlemen,
1239
01:26:53,250 --> 01:26:55,585
the Wellington Academy
Drill Team.
1240
01:26:55,669 --> 01:26:56,837
(AUDIENCE CHEERING)
1241
01:26:56,920 --> 01:26:58,880
You need me to
tell you the story
1242
01:26:58,964 --> 01:27:02,009
about the
Little Engine That Could
again?
1243
01:27:03,969 --> 01:27:07,222
Then you get out there
and you toot
that horn, boy.
1244
01:27:09,099 --> 01:27:11,518
Toot, toot.
1245
01:27:13,854 --> 01:27:15,856
Toot, toot.
1246
01:27:19,443 --> 01:27:22,654
BRAGGART:
Ladies and gentlemen,
Madison Preparatory School.
1247
01:27:22,738 --> 01:27:24,364
(CROWD CHEERING)
1248
01:27:28,076 --> 01:27:29,619
(DRUM ROLL)
1249
01:27:30,620 --> 01:27:33,665
Drill Team leader,
Private Kevin "Tiger" Dunne.
1250
01:27:33,749 --> 01:27:36,084
(ALL LAUGHING)
1251
01:27:46,386 --> 01:27:47,471
Bust a move!
1252
01:27:47,554 --> 01:27:48,597
(HIP-HOP MUSIC
PLAYING ON SPEAKERS)
1253
01:27:48,680 --> 01:27:50,849
ALL: (SINGING)
Now here we are together
1254
01:27:50,932 --> 01:27:52,893
Ready to do whatever
1255
01:27:52,976 --> 01:27:54,936
We started out as boys
1256
01:27:55,020 --> 01:27:57,564
Now we're men
And we're making noise
1257
01:27:57,647 --> 01:27:59,441
Stand back and step clear
1258
01:27:59,524 --> 01:28:01,902
Madison cadets
are the ones to fear
1259
01:28:02,444 --> 01:28:06,156
If you don't believe
Battle us and you will see
1260
01:28:07,032 --> 01:28:11,453
Oh, yeah, here we come
Here we come, here we come
1261
01:28:11,620 --> 01:28:13,830
Hip-hop, hip-hop
hip-hop ho
1262
01:28:13,914 --> 01:28:16,124
Hip-hop, hip-hop
hip-hop ho
1263
01:28:16,208 --> 01:28:18,418
We can get down
'Cause it's
in our souls
1264
01:28:18,502 --> 01:28:20,170
We can get down
'Cause it's in our souls
1265
01:28:20,253 --> 01:28:21,797
Hit me with a one, two
1266
01:28:21,880 --> 01:28:22,923
One, two
1267
01:28:23,006 --> 01:28:24,174
Hit me with a three, four
1268
01:28:24,257 --> 01:28:25,300
Three, four
1269
01:28:25,384 --> 01:28:27,386
ALL: One, two, three, four
1270
01:28:27,469 --> 01:28:29,971
One, two, three, four
1271
01:28:30,055 --> 01:28:32,099
Mark time, march!
1272
01:28:32,307 --> 01:28:34,101
(CADETS EXCLAIMING)
1273
01:28:34,267 --> 01:28:35,769
Present arms.
1274
01:28:37,854 --> 01:28:39,356
Forward march.
1275
01:28:39,689 --> 01:28:41,942
(GRUNTING)
1276
01:28:48,240 --> 01:28:50,117
Order arms!
1277
01:28:56,289 --> 01:28:57,749
Philly stomp.
1278
01:29:06,258 --> 01:29:07,592
ALL: Ho!
1279
01:29:42,419 --> 01:29:44,045
(SINGING) One, two, three!
1280
01:29:44,129 --> 01:29:45,589
Get down on the hip-hop
1281
01:29:45,672 --> 01:29:47,841
Get down and get funky
and you don't stop
1282
01:29:47,924 --> 01:29:49,468
What, do that, do that
1283
01:29:49,551 --> 01:29:50,594
Go, Tiger
1284
01:29:50,677 --> 01:29:54,181
Do that, do that
Get down, do that, do that
1285
01:29:54,264 --> 01:29:57,684
Go, Tiger, do that, do that
Get down, do that
1286
01:29:57,809 --> 01:29:59,603
(WHOOPING) Do that, go, Tiger
1287
01:29:59,686 --> 01:30:01,062
Do that, do that
1288
01:30:01,146 --> 01:30:02,898
Get down Do that, do that
1289
01:30:03,023 --> 01:30:04,816
(SCREAMING) Go, Tiger
1290
01:30:06,359 --> 01:30:08,028
(GUNS FIRE) Salute.
1291
01:30:08,778 --> 01:30:10,447
BRAGGART:
Madison Preparatory School.
1292
01:30:10,530 --> 01:30:12,157
(CROWD CHEERING)
1293
01:31:02,249 --> 01:31:04,376
Company, atten-hut!
1294
01:31:09,673 --> 01:31:11,716
Sir, squad is formed, sir.
1295
01:31:14,553 --> 01:31:15,637
Post.
1296
01:31:22,477 --> 01:31:27,774
My name
is Major Benson
Winifred Payne!
1297
01:31:28,900 --> 01:31:32,279
I'd like to be
the first
to welcome you
1298
01:31:32,362 --> 01:31:34,239
to the Madison School.
1299
01:31:35,115 --> 01:31:37,325
What we've tried
to develop here
1300
01:31:37,409 --> 01:31:39,953
is a family environment.
1301
01:31:40,412 --> 01:31:43,081
One of trust and understanding.
1302
01:31:44,291 --> 01:31:49,462
I'd like for you to think
of me not only as
your commanding officer
1303
01:31:49,921 --> 01:31:51,590
but as your friend.
1304
01:31:51,673 --> 01:31:53,174
(BARKS)
1305
01:31:54,217 --> 01:31:56,928
And what the hell is that?
1306
01:31:57,637 --> 01:31:58,972
He's mine.
1307
01:32:00,640 --> 01:32:01,975
(WHISTLES)
1308
01:32:07,063 --> 01:32:08,815
That a boy. Sit.
1309
01:32:09,482 --> 01:32:10,775
Good boy.
1310
01:32:16,615 --> 01:32:21,536
You know, there ain't no
pets allowed on these here
premises, Mr. Ace Ventura.
1311
01:32:22,078 --> 01:32:23,997
Yeah, well, maybe
that doesn't
apply to me.
1312
01:32:24,080 --> 01:32:26,207
He's my blind
seeing-eye dog.
1313
01:32:28,835 --> 01:32:32,172
What in the world
would anybody want
with a blind dog?
1314
01:32:33,006 --> 01:32:34,341
The dog ain't blind.
1315
01:32:34,424 --> 01:32:36,384
I'm the one
that's blind,
you idiot.
1316
01:32:39,012 --> 01:32:41,139
Oh, I see
you and your friend
Cujo here
1317
01:32:41,222 --> 01:32:43,224
got a little
attitudinal problem,
1318
01:32:43,308 --> 01:32:45,060
needs some readjusting.
1319
01:32:45,143 --> 01:32:48,521
Well, I'm gonna
fix that up quick,
fast and in a hurry.
1320
01:32:48,605 --> 01:32:50,106
Hey, Corporal.
1321
01:32:52,817 --> 01:32:55,320
Go tell Mama
to bring
my field knife.
1322
01:33:02,994 --> 01:33:04,579
(DOG MOANING)
1323
01:33:08,041 --> 01:33:09,709
(WHIMPERING)
1324
01:33:11,920 --> 01:33:13,213
(CHUCKLES)
1325
01:33:27,060 --> 01:33:28,687
(PAYNE LAUGHING)