(Children Yelling, Talking)
(Children's Choir) And a cool frosty morning
Past three o'clock
Good morrow, masters all
Born is a baby gentle as may be
Son of eternal father tomorrow
Past three o'clock
And a cool frosty morning
Past three o'clock
Good morrow, masters all
Past three o'clock
(Off-Key) And a cool, frosty morning
Good morrow, masters all
(Choir Continues, Boy Off-Key)
Angel bell ringeth hark now they...
- (Choir Continues, Faint) - (Boys Yelling, Laughing)
And past three o'clock
- (Ding) - And a cold frosty morning
- Past three o'clock - Is she here yet?
No, not yet. Calm down, Dad.
Good morrow masters all
- (Choir Continues) - So, what are you hoping for,
- I don't wanna know. I'm old-fashioned. - Then why is she coming to tell you?
- I don't wanna know, but I'm dyin' to know.
(Continues)
Elaine is here, Michael.
- At the office? - I think so.
- Son of eternal father tomorrow - Oh, uh...
Uh, I might have some news for you tomorrow, kids.
Oh, uh... released.!
Whoa, hold up! Look. Here.
- What is it? - It's an ounce of solid gold.
- The kid's not even born yet, and you want him to go into banking.
By the time the kid gets to be 21, this'll be worth so much...
that he can buy a car with it or pay for his college education.
- That is the beauty of it. - That's sweet of you, Tommy. Thanks.
See, it's always there for you when you need it.
- (Door Closes) - (Michael) Well, well,
A little Matthew? Great name, gotta admit.
Matthew. Cowardly and nervous,
Oh, wait.
What if it's a girl?
Mathilda.! Your choice.
I could get used to it.
Uh, sweet Mathilda of the lowlands.
I know it's your mother's name...
but have you considered changing
What's the matter? Are you all right?
Yes.
What is this?
It's a test I had done.
A genetic test.
- Why would you have that done? - I had a reason.
- (Whispering) Oh, God. - (Footsteps)
Tommy?
It's not yours, Michael.
She's not yours.
Well... this'll be nice in the memory box,
(Siren Wailing)
(Whispering)
(Boys Laughing)
Boogeyman!
- (Grunts) - Come on!
Oh, that is... that is nice work.
Cut a check, Tom.
Feel the top.
Nice.
Well, there he goes again.
Every week, just like clockwork.
- It's none of our business. Where? - (Chuckles)
- Hmm. Must be payday. - Leave him alone.
I met this schoolteacher guy who knew him about 5 years ago.
Said he actually had a personality.
Well, I guess he hocked it over at Mrs. Simon's store,
(Chuckles)
(Mrs. Simon) Nice coin, huh?
Guy wasn't kidding about the grade.
What do you think of this?
It's not gonna be around here long.
Once the weather balloon people get wind of this, they're gonna
I guess the weather balloon people...
- Are a lot like the moose head collectors in that respect.
Oh, hell, never mind.
I don't understand half the things you're
- (Boy) Hey, Mom. - There you are.
- Will you watch the store for me a minute?
Hey! Come here.
Go ahead.
(Computer Beeps)
There's a guy in line with some B.U. Walking liberties, ;
He's in California, so you wouldn't have
- I'm not interested in silver. - (Beeps)
Sorry. just getting some quotes.
You can do all that from there?
Oh, I could flush the Vatican toilet if I wanted.
- (Beeps) - Silver's good. Why just gold?
Always there for ya when you need it.
I'll take the coin.
Thank you, Mrs. Simon.
(Whispering) Call me April after five years.
(Man) Son of a bitch, Joe, where's my lucky scratcher?
When I hit this thing, there's gonna be some
- Yeah, you're gonna build a library. - Why not?
(Man Laughing)
Gimme twenty. I wanna continue my lucky streak.
How long has that lucky streak been goin' on, Tanny?
Since birth, boys. Since birth.
This McCann guy, he, uh, pays y'all rent, don't he?
So I guess you know what, uh, what goes on
You know, Jody down at the bank...
she says, uh, McCann ain't got no bank account;
- I think he keeps it at home. - Good for him.
I keep mine at Morgan Stanley...
and dole it out to my big brother when I see ft...
- If it were up to me, I'd give it all to him right now.
Hey, now.! There you go.
Gimme five bucks, my man.
(Bach's "Cello Suite No. 1 In G Major. ; The Prelude")
(People Talking, Children Laughing)
(P.A. Announcer) Bryce brings the ball
Whoa.! There's a tremendous hit down the field.
That ball's got to have carried, what, 1 00 yards, probably.
Both teams move down towards the ball.
Zero to zero, in the first chucker. Newland scores.!
Another goal For John Newland.
(P.A.) Soon to be our representative in Washington...
- If his money means anything at all. - (Spectators Laughing)
And you can tell 'em that if they vote for me...
not only do I promise world peace...
- But I'll fix all the potholes on Stewart Street.
Your brother is so great.
- (Horse Whinnying) - (Man) Come on. Come on.!
- (Man) You looked good out there. - (Chuckles)
You mean campaigning or polo playing?
If we're going to put party money behind you, we wanna know,
you're clean.
What about... your brother?
He was a little... embarrassing...
after your state campaign.
We all know that brothers don't lose elections. Don't we?
Can you control him?
Always.
Do me a favour. ; don't tell any jokes.
They don't mix with politics.
I will be decidedly...
unfunny.
(Sports Announcer On TV, Faint)
Still need me a bit, don't ya?
I'll be goin' out tonight afterwards...
- So may I please use your car? - No.
Hmm. Predictable answer out of the way.
I said, no.
- Take the Plymouth. - Right.
"Say, girls, wanna go for a ride in my '66 Plymouth?"
You'll be as high as a kite by 10:00, you won't even
And neither will the trash that you're with.
You get sober, now you think you're Jesus, is that it?
Wonderful daddy's boy.
You wouldn't be so wonderful if everybody knew what I knew,
Now, you listen to me... if I lose, you lose.
Go get drunk, go get stoned, go get laid.
just do it in a Plymouth.
You hear me?
(Railroad Crossing Bell Ringing)
- (Talking, Laughing) - (Rock)
- (Man) What's up, Bobby? - (Talking, Laughing Continue)
- You goin' in there, man? - Where is she? Where is she?
(Continues)
- Pennies from heaven. - (Sighs)
Pennies is right.
Tell him we need more.
Tell him his little girl needs more.
I do tell him, but it doesn't help.
- Hey, don't take that. It's all I've got.
I promise. The two of you deserve a lot more than
- (Baby Crying) - What he wants is to keep you
- (Crying Continues) - Son of a bitch.
Shh.
Invest it wisely.
(Baby Coughs)
(Charms Jingling)
That oughta warm your heart, "Daddy. "
To save
Your dying
Soul
Baby, please
Give me one
More chance
I'll do anything
For you
Baby, please
Give me one
More chance
I'll do anything
For you
- (Continues) - (Woman) You are old
Enough
To know
- (Giggling) - That every
Thing shines
Like gold
You're old enough
- Wake up. - To know
- (Girl) Slow down. - (Continues)
- (Tanny) Shit. - Jesus! God!
- Damn it! - Shut up!
(Yells)
(Screaming)
(Crash)
(Police Radio, Faint)
Geez, what a night.
- (Moaning Softly) - (Policeman) Oh, my God.
(Grunting)
Shit.
Well, well, Mr. McCann.
(Panting)
(Sharp Breath)
(Rattle At Door)
(Heavy Breathing)
(Sighs)
- (Grunts) - (Coins Jingling)
(Sighs, Giggles)
(Yells)
(Echoing) Nothin' over here, sir.
- How 'bout down there? - We'll check it.
- (Policeman) Nothin; - We're goin' up on the ridge.!
Yeah, I got that over there. It's clear.
(Policeman) There was a stranger in town last week,
We'll check him out, but...
I kinda think it was someone who knew the area,
You, uh...
You got insurance?
Mr. Newland, just a couple of questions.
What about your brother's disappearance?
Why, Nancy Lammeter.
- So, uh, how did y'all vote? - (Reporter) Over here.!
I just couldn't make up my mind.
- Any truth your brother's run off to South America?
- Mr. Newland.! - (Reporters Continue Shouting)
(Bell Rings)
The police were saying that after the accident,
I've left that out of the story for now.
Then he stumbles on McCann's house,
He's probably uninjured because of
There wasn't any blood around McCann's house.
Plus, he made a pretty quick getaway;
- So he must've been okay. - Tanny wouldn't hurt himself,
He just likes to hurt others.
(Guests Talking, Laughing)
(Female Vocal)
(Man, Faint) Nice to be on the winning team.
- (Woman, Faint) Landslide, huh? - That's right.
Let's celebrate.
When I take my sugar to tea
I'm a rowdy dowdy that's me
- (Continues) - Oh, hello, Judge Marcus.
- I'm Nancy Lammeter. - Oh, you know my name.
I studied johns vs. Dobson in college.
- You made our little town a big one. - Thank you, my dear.
- Hello, Dr. Roberts. - How are you?
Fine, thank you. Hello. Good evening.
We forget about our cares
Rubbing elbows at the Ritz
With those millionaires
Where is the money man?
Mmm.
That's your father.
You wanna see your father?
- Baby! - He'd like that, wouldn't he?
What's he doin' tonight, honey?
What's your daddy doin' tonight?
He forgot about you.
He shouldn't have forgot about his little girl.
(Crying Softly)
Daddy shouldn't have forgot his little girl.
(Coughs)
- You wanna see your father? - (Engine Starts)
(Guitars)
- (Continues) - (Guests Talking)
- Are you enjoying the party? - Yes.
(Continues)
(Engine Sputtering, Knocking)
Mommy.
Come on, baby.
(Grunting, Panting)
Careful.
Come here, sweetie.
(Baby Coughs)
Aah! Geez! Oh! God!
Ohh! Aah!
Mommy!
Mommy? Boy, are you off.
Mommy.
Stay. Stay! Sit!
Sit.
(People Talking)
Say Louie, Louie whoa, baby
- (Continues) - She doesn't see the guy.
- Does anyone know this child? - What's this all about?
I want the doctor. The doctor's here, isn't he?
Yeah, but let's not ruin the party. Let me take it upstairs...
- There's a woman lying in the snow outside my house.
(Michael) She's dead, I think.
- What did he say? - (Woman) There's something
- Somebody get the doctor. - (Man) I'll radio the station.
Mrs. Simon, could you take care of the child?
(Mrs. Simon) Okay.
- Yeah. - (Crying)
Ohh. It's okay. It's okay.
(Crying Stops)
Take us to the spot.
(Man) I'll catch a ride with you.
- Sure. - It's all right, it's all right.
- It's all right. Okay. - (Baby Crying)
- (Crying Continues) - (Mrs. Simon) Shh.
- Shh. - (Man) Come on, Harry.
- Shh. - (Baby Moaning)
- (Police Radio, Faint) - (Doctor) Heroin user.
That kid's probably damaged goods.
Do you know who she is?
I've never seen her before in my life.
Give us some room, guys.
(Crunching) Anyone want a mint?
(Clock Ticking)
(Knocking)
You're not damaged goods, are ya, kid?
(Baby Cooing)
(Laughing)
She likes you the most.
I think we should get her over to Elderfield...
let the welfare department take care of her.
- Where would she end up? - No way of knowing.
Far away, most likely.
- She's alone, and I'm alone. - What do you mean?
She... came to replace my money, you know.
- What if I kept her? - (Sniffs)
You mean, uh, kept her here in town?
just be yourself.
- (Sighs) - (Door Closes)
I don't have a self. (Clears Throat)
You live alone?
l-I'm divorced.
Do you think you'd make a good father?
Yes, I do.
- Do you own any property? - No.
I did, though. l-I had it stolen.
I mean, uh, it was stolen from me.
(Chuckling) "I had it stolen."
It sounds like, uh, you know, I asked someone to steal it,
l, uh, had it taken. Uh... you know.
Are you a homosexual?
Not that I know of.
I mean, uh, you know, uh... I'm not.
I just don't have any interest in that, uh, area.
He is.
How could you, a single man, take care of this child?
Well, uh, I would, uh...
I would wake up, and then I would, uh...
take care of the child and then I would, uh, go to bed.
Hmm. What about when you have to go to work?
I wouldn't go to work. l... I work at home.
I wouldn't have to leave. I make furniture.
In fact, I could offer you both a very nice armoire...
Uh, f-f-forgive me.
It's not that easy to raise a child.
Well, nothing's easy.
Uh, look, I'm not very good at interviews...
so you have to overlook everything you see in front of you right now.
Much the same way when you're served a bowl of Jell-O...
it might not look so appetizing all quivering
but it actually tastes quite good.
If you gave me this child...
I'm sure that if you came back in a year, you would
l-I believe this child belongs with me.
She... walked into my house.
Ah, here's John.
Hello. Mr. Newland, I think we should discuss
That shouldn't be a problem.
- If we can't fix that, we can't fix anything.
- Fine. - Certainly. Let's go on up.
(Baby Crying)
Whoops. (Exploding Sound)
(Baby Moaning Softly)
Hello, Mama.
(Cooing)
(Chuckles Softly)
(Cooing)
Hey, I talked to Dr. Roberts and I said, "How did this happen?"
And he said, "Don't ask." So I didn't.
I think I'm a quasi-foster parent with a twist of the arm
Finally, corruption for the good guy.
I still have tons of Lawrence's baby stuff if you need it.
Hey, you've gotta test that on your wrist.
Why? Aaaah! Aaaah!
Geez! God! Aaah!
- That's why. - (Groans)
What about a name for her?
(Baby Laughing)
I wanna call her Mathilda.
Mathil...
I will give you the deed to my house
She's gonna have to spell it all the time; people will
Yeah, I know, but it's what I've decided.
If anyone calls her Tildy, you're gonna hafta kill 'em.
- Hey. Mathilda. Hi! - (Mathilda Cooing)
April.
(Man Grunts)
- Oh, my Lord. - (Tires Screeching)
(Mathilda Cooing)
There we go.
(Mathilda Laughs)
If you don't mind my saying so, I think this is the first time...
I've seen you buy something for someone else.
This is for me.
- (Rattles) - Why?
I was kidding.
Another first, if you don't mind me saying so.
Two cents.
- (Baby Talk) - Huh?
Daddy.
(Man) Gotta move back around here on the other side.
Hello, Michael.
(Charms Jingling)
Now, let's see.
If I were your age, what would I like to eat?
Hmm.
What about... baby food?
Oh! That sounds delicious. And... I have some.
You know, what better time of life than your age...
to enjoy baby food?
Because somehow, as one gets older,
for unsalted mashed carrots.
Although I understand that many of the finer
are now serving unsalted mashed carrots.
So, we'll just give you this little taste.
Here it is. just a little taste.
Doesn't that look good? Hmm? Open up just a little bit.
Hey, hey, look at me. I'm eating it.
(Clears Throat Quietly)
I'll make you some oatmeal.
- (Dishes Rattling) - Ma-thilda
- (Mathilda Laughing)
Ma-thilda you take-a my money
Once again now Ma-thilda
Oh, baby, baby, baby Ma-thilda
(Laughing Continues)
Ma-thilda you take-a my money
Hey, you.
Mathilda.
Mathilda?
Mathilda!
- Ohh! God! - (Mathilda Giggling)
- Ohh! - (Giggling Continues)
- You think that's hilarious? - Yeah!
You think that's hilarious? Well, you're naughty,
But you're nice, nice, nice.
(Children Talking)
Oh, he'll be back, baby.
(Children Continue Talking)
- I need something that'll amuse a three-year-old.
Very funny.
You've had this weather balloon a long time.
- How much is it? - A hundred bucks?
- Would you take fve? - Sold.!
- Where can I get gas? - Diner across the street.
(Chuckles)
There we go. Up, up and away!
(Laughing)
Hello, Mathilda!
(Mrs. Simon, Mathilda Laughing)
(Laughing) Hey! Hey, Lawrence!
Wave good-bye, just in case.
(Laughs)
- Ho! Nice day for a swim. Nice day for a swim!
Whoa! (Laughing)
Here I come, here I come.
- (Laughing) - (Lawrence) My turn now.!
Hey, Mathilda! Whoa!
How ya doin'?
We're comin' in for a perfect four-pointer!
- (Squealing, Giggling) - (Grunting)
Whew! Whew! That one hurt.
(Mrs. Simon) Go, Tildy.!
(All Laughing, Chattering)
- Whoa! - Go, Tildy!
All right. Okay. Okay.
(Mathilda Giggling)
What's the matter?
(Giggling Continues)
(Grunts) All right.
(Giggling Continues)
(Grunts) Oh, you're heavy.
Nancy.
What?
Esther, I don't think we...
I don't think we have enough salmon. Why don't
I'm sure we have enough, Mrs. Newland.
You've got six guests and two large salmon.
I think you'll have leftovers you'll be eating for a week.
Call a doctor. Somebody call a doctor!
(John) We can try again.
- Hmm? And think... - (Sniffs)
Think of the fun we'll have, hmm?
- Mmm. - I'm sorry.
I don't want you ever to say that to me again.
You will have a child.
You will.
(Sanding Wood)
Mathilda!
Tilda, honey!
Mathilda!
(Mathilda Squeals)
(Mathilda Giggles)
You're killin' me. You're killin' me!
They gotta get a fence around this place or
(Mathilda Laughing)
We're comin' down, we're comin' down.
We're comin' down... ohh!
(Laughs) Hey!
- (Giggling) - There you go. There you go.
Don't do that to Daddy anymore. Don't do it to Daddy.
Okay?
- You just have to punish her, otherwise she'll never learn.
- I can't do that. - You have to. It's your duty.
- Well, I can't spank her. - Nobody says you have to spank her.
What do I do, behead her teddy bear?
- I'd have to report you for that. - (Mathilda) No.!
- Well, what should I do? - With Lawrence, I used to put
Don't do it. Look what it done to me.
I did it.
(Page Turning)
(Thumping)
Twinkle, twinkle little star
How I wonder what you are
(Cuckooing)
(Cuckooing Continues)
Okay, you're free. (Clears Throat)
All right, we're all done. Now, what do you want
(Giggles)
(Children Laughing, Screaming)
- Hey... no, no, this is school! - No!
- Just think, you'll finally meet someone younger than me.
- Well, she adopted me. Yeah. - No! Noooo!
Could I talk to you a minute?
Nooo.! (Wailing)
(Children Chattering)
(Teacher) All right, class, it is used for
You use it to write on...
and draw on.
What is it?
- (Teacher) Cory. - Paper.
Very good.!
You get your degree yet, Mr. McCann?
(Laughs)
(Laughs Loudly)
(Puppy Whining)
Don't... twist...
the puppy's... head.
(Children Humming Mournfully)
(Humming Continues)
- (Whinnies) - Mathilda.
- What's goin' on? - Mouse burial.
We found a dead mouse.
You like, uh... you like horses?
- How did your mouse die? - It was run over by a car.
That's why we're burying it in a pizza box.
- Oh, I see. - I'm kidding.
Oh. I see.
Cat got it. Nobody's fault, really.
just one of those things.
Well... have a nice burial.
We're trying, but it's hard.
- Bye. - Bye.
(Humming Continues)
(Horse Whinnies)
(Horse Snorts, Gentle Hoofbeats)
(Mathilda, Faint) Red is the rose
That in the garden grows
Fair is the lily
Of the valley
Clear is the water
That flows in my garden
But my love is better than any
Down by the garden...
(Continues, Faint)
(Machinery Whirring)
(Whirring)
- (Whirring Stops) - What's the matter?
Well, come on. What's the matter?
- I can write really small. - Huh? What do you mean?
What is it?
It's the 23rd psalm.
Holy smokes.
I guess "why" would be inappropriate.
Cool, huh?
Are you suffering from ennui?
- Huh? - Come on.
- Oomba ooga oomba ooga - (Indian Yelp)
- Oomba ooga oomba ooga - On the bank
Of the river
Stood Running Bear
Young Indian brave
On the other side of the river
- Stood his lovely Indian maid - (Giggles)
Little White Dove was-a her name
Such a lovely sight to see
But their tribes fought with each other
So their love could never be
Running Bear dove in the water
Little White Dove did the same
And they swam
Up to each other
Through the swirling stream they came
As their hands touched and their lips met
- The raging river pulled them down - (Giggling)
Now they'll always be together
In that happy hunting ground
Running Bear loved Little White Dove
- With a love that couldn't die - (Laughing)
- Oomba ooga, oomba ooga oomba ooga
(Sighs) Whew!
- Whew.! - Yeah.
Dad, we've gotta get out more.
(Sanding Noise)
(Boy) Come on, hit the ball.
You got a baseball bat there, not a rolling pin.
Come on, sissy. You can't play baseball.
Come on, strike 'er out.!
Come on, Pierce! She can't hit, she's a girl.
(Girl) Hit it.!
- (Umpire) Strike.! - All right, strike one! Yeah!
- Boy, are we losin'! - (Woman) Shut up, Janet.
- (Indistinct Yelling) - (Catcher) Go get in a cookin'class.
She's a sissy! Come on, hurry up
- Strike two! - Come on, Mathilda!
Lawrence is crazy about her. He tries to talk to her.
She just ignores him and she won't give him
I don't think she's thinking about that stuff yet.
Here we go, girl!
(Crowd Cheering, Applauding)
Go back! You're goin' the wrong way!
You're supposed to go the other way! Dang!
You go this way, not that way!
Girls!
(Cheering, Applause Continue)
Yes, Mathilda.! Yes, Mathilda.!
We lost! We lost! We lost!
(Cheering)
(Giggling, Chattering)
Good game, kid.
Good "spectatoring," Pops.
I gotta take this piece of furniture up to the Newlands tomorrow...
- So I'll be gone early. - Could I go?
You know, I'm dying to see inside. I heard they have gold salt shakers.
Hey, just because our salt shakers are linoleum...
- It's no reason to put 'em down. - And they have a butler!
Yeah, and he's English too. Here's what happens:
Mrs. Newland rings a little bell, and the butler
- (English Accent) "Tea, sir? Tea?" - (Girls Giggle)
- Yeah, you can go if you want. - Thanks, Pop.
- Oh, let me go with you, please! - Come on, I wanna go there so...
Now we're gonna let him manipulate Fred...
swap his vote later down the line on the tax credit.
- I want a yes vote from you. Right? - Right.
You're gonna get a call from that son of a bitch Boggs...
about your vote on the farm thing.
Play along, say anything. Then you'll fiip-fiop
He won't have enough votes if you wait late enough.
By the way, John...
we're having diffculty getting permission to divert water...
- From the quarry for your project. - No, you're not.
- Yes, we are. - No, you don't understand. We are not.
Not if you want the yes vote.
(Explosion)
(Man #1) Let's bring two more sections up.!
(Man #2) just two more?
- (Man #1 Shouting) - (Man #2) All right.
(John) We're gonna divert the water
from the quarry here.
Let it go down through the valley to form a lake.
And then we're gonna sell the property around it
But you know, there's a beautiful spot just right here...
I thought would be a real nice place for you
So we can go live next to a bunch of ducks?
(Laughing)
john?
You oughta snap outta this.
You're sleepwalkin'.
- Mr. McCann is here with the delivery. - Thank you, Esther.
- Hello, Michael. - Hi.
- Hi, Mathilda. - Hello, Mrs. Newland.
I hope you don't mind me bringing her. She's never been up here before.
No, it's no problem at all.
- Mathilda, would you like to come in? - Thank you, Mrs. Newland.
- (Michael) I'll get the drawers. - Come on.
(Nancy) Now, are you thirsty?
- No, ma'am. - Okay.
- That's by Andrew Wyeth! - Yes, it is.
Oh, have you seen this picture here?
That's the way the house used to look in the old days.
You see that man there? That's my grandfather.
And that little boy beside him, that's my father.
Dad, books on horses!
- Easy. - Got it. I got it.
(Nancy) That's great. Thank you.
- Would you like to see the real horses? - Yes, sir!
- If it's not too much trouble. - No, of course it's not.
Tea, sir?
(Giggling)
- Up we go. - Oh!
(Laughing) Dad, look.!
(John) Now, you gotta be sittin' absolutely straight.
- Yeah, hold onto the reins tight. - Okay.
There she comes. Annie Oakley.
(Nancy Laughing) I'm gonna go get the camera.
Fastest gal on a horse this town's ever seen.
Michael.
She is havin' such a great time out there.
She has a real passion for horses.
I was thinkin', Michael, of maybe invitin' her up here...
- For some lessons, if that's okay with you.
- Can I tell her? - Be my guest.
And thank you.
- Dad, it's time. - Okay, take off.
(Whining)
Remind me to cut that hole bigger.
(Whining, Panting)
You... are... done.
- (Giggling) - Let's see. Yes! (Laughing)
(Nancy) That looks good, with all that food
- (Mathilda Laughing) - That looks good.
Look at me, Mr. Newland!
I'm sorry.
- Sorry for what? - I'm sorry I couldn't
You look at her, I know how you feel.
Sorry I couldn't give you this.
Look, Nancy, it's all done.
No, it's not.
We can still have a family. Why won't you think about adopting?
(Sighs) This isn't something I want
- Don't turn away. Excuse us, please! - Yes, ma'am.
Adopted children, they... they become your own children.
Look at the Greens.
Look at Michael McCann.
- Michael McCann has her because of me. - I know.
You helped him. Why you won't help yourself,
That's not what I mean, Nancy.
Michael McCann has her...
because of me.
(Mathilda) Come on, we gotta go faster.
What are you sayin'?
Are you sayin' Mathilda is your daughter?
(Inhales) I thought I could be strong.
just havin' her in the house, l...
Look, Nancy, the woman who died in the snow
Yeah, I thought it was strange, how you
Now I understand it's not so strange at all.
- Nancy. - Don't.
Don't.
- Mathilda. - Hi.
Did you have fun?
I did.
Do you like it here?
I love it.
Good.
Well... bye.
Bye.
There have been times that I have wanted to leave.
After we lost the second child...
I thought I was bringing you too much pain.
But then I thought if you had someone else...
they might bring you children but pain in some other way.
If I'd told anybody back then...
I would've been ruined politically.
And if I had told you...
I know that you would not have stayed with me.
If you had taken her...
she would have known me as her mother.
And you, you would've been happier with me.
Our lives would've been more like we thought
(Sighs)
I see it all now.
Ten years too late.
What?
I chose the wrong door.
You are her natural father.
You are her father.
Hmm?
- (Clicks Tongue) - (Neighs)
(Keating) See, what you're doin'is very good.
just keep asking her over as much as possible.
Let her get used to frst class.
Have you given it any thought?
This is how we can get Every Joe six-pack
They all want to win the lottery, and this kid can.
She goes from beggar to princess.
We'll even have McCann believing it.
So our money may finally have some use.
(Bicycle Bell Rings)
- Hey, how're you doin'? - Hi.
You, uh...
- You ready to ride? - Oh, yeah.
Tom?
Now, which of these three guys do you like the best?
- The grey one. - The grey one. Well...
you can have him.
- Huh? - He's yours.
(Laughs)
- Holy smokes! (Laughs) - (Chuckles)
And you can come up here anytime you want.
You can ride him anytime you want, and you can
You have a name you'd like to call him?
Um... I'll have to do some research, but Sparkle
You can call him Flipper if you want. He's yours.
By the way, uh...
l-I think that maybe we should keep this to ourselves.
- How come? - Oh, just keep it our secret.
- Why? - Okay, you can tell your dad
he mightn't like it.
Parents can be kinda funny about things like this.
- Really? - Mm-hmm.
- Hey, just in time for nachos. - I'm full.
(Knock At Door)
I think we should talk.
Already I don't like it.
I just think that maybe...
- You shouldn't go up to the Newlands so much.
Well, you live here...
and... it's... you know, you can overstay your welcome.
- But they invite me. - I know, I know.
But sometimes it's possible to abuse a situation...
without really realizing it.
- I wanna go. It's not hurting anyone.
- I'm going. - Well, sometimes...
you can't have everything you want. Now just don't be greedy.
Look who's talking.
What do you mean?
judy's dad said that you were a miser...
that you loved money.
You loved it so much, you kept it in your own house
And that's why it was stolen, because you wouldn't put it
- All right, you're not going up there anymore.
- No, you're not! - Yes, I am!
(Nancy) You couldn't have
I did write it myself.
- (Instructor) That's good. - (Applauding)
(Michael) She's definitely good.
She's fine.
She's good.
Real good.
She flubbed it 'cause she's in a bad mood. She hates me right
Oh, sure. Five, six years, a little therapy...
Prozac shaped like Flintstones, she'll get over it.
She doesn't mean it.
(Michael) You know what?
I think she's being scouted. You see this guy?
He's been around. I think he's some kind
And he's coming this way.
That your daughter?
Quite a little talent, isn't she?
You're Michael McCann?
And I represent her.
You are served.
Problem.
That's funny. I thought I was the victim
You're not getting her.
I think you would really want what is best for her.
You are not getting her.
She is my child. That is profoundly unchangeable.
If you love her so much...
then why did you turn your back on her ten years ago?
(Nancy) It's inevitable. Inevitable.
Now, you can fight this or you can accept it.
there is no way she won't prefer her real father
You might want her now, but it's me she's been
- Ever since she could say the word! - Oh, God.
Hello, Mathilda.
Mr. Newland is my real father?
Yes, he is.
Would you like to come and live here
I don't know what I'm supposed to say.
When you turn a gift away from your door...
it, uh...
it goes to the one that takes it in.
Dad?
Where was my mother buried?
I don't know.
We never knew where she was taken.
Why not?
I was afraid. I was afraid that...
they might find a relative...
or your father or someone who might take you away from me.
One day I'd like to know where she is.
We could do that.
Mrs. Simon can find anything on her computer.
just a minute.
(Charms Jingling)
This, uh...
was your mother's, and you should have it.
I mean, it's you and her, isn't it? You're my parents.
You and Mom, not the Newlands.
Uh, I'll fix you a drink. Uh, you know...
Make you some juice.
Do you know what it means, that he's your real father?
Do you, you know, understand how babies are made?
(Laughing Continues)
This fairy tale story of a little match girl...
who discovered she's a princess.
- Let's get some opinions. - Well, now how's he supposed to
I mean, she can still see him. It's just that she'll be livin'
Kinda like me and my ex-husband.
(T. V. Reporter) Okay, so that's six for
To cast your vote dial 8 1 0-REALDAD.
This is WAPB.
We bring you other people's business.
Mrs. Latham...
you currently are the principal and teacher
- Where Mathilda Newland attends, are you not?
- Mathilda Newland? - He's just trying to get your goat.
Speaking as a teacher, do you think this child
to attend a college of the prestige
Mathilda has unlimited potential.
Do you know what it costs to attend Harvard or Yale?
Lots, I suppose.
- Wait 'til he gets me up there. - No further questions, Your Honor.
Thinks he's getting little Aunt Mildred
- (Judge) You may step down. - What he's getting is
The court calls Mrs. April Simon.
Please raise your right hand.
Do you solemnly swear that the testimony you are
shall be the truth, the whole truth and nothing
You bet your boots.
(Mrs. Simon) He is a great father. He's caring. He thinks
- Mm-hmm. - Uh-huh.
And he's not your typical great father. He's original, he's creative.
He's very unconventional.
Unconventional? How?
- What? - You said he was unconventional.
Well, um... when Mathilda was just a toddler...
in order to keep an eye on her, he used to tie her up
We thought it was hilarious.
- What, tie her up? - Not "tie her up," no.
just, you know, tie her to a table leg or something
Ah. Tie her to a table leg?
Why, could the ribbon have become entangled
No. It was tied around here.
- Not exactly the latest in parenting, is it, Mrs. Simon?
- But that's my point. - Perhaps you can tell us
that Mr. McCann does that are... different.
Yes. He has educated Mathilda in his own way.
When she was learning to read, he told her not to read
but instead read the books that he gave her. Adult books.
He wouldn't let her read the schoolbooks?
- Because she didn't want to read the schoolbooks.
read... adult books.
Yes, right. No, not "adult" books.
May I be excused, please?
Thank you, Mrs. Simon. That's all.
- (Whispering) I'm sorry.
Mrs. Simon, we're not done yet.
Ah, shit. Excuse me.
(Spectators Murmuring)
No questions.
I don't blame you.
- (Champagne Cork Pops) - (Nancy And John) Whoo!
(Laughing)
Oh! Thank you, sir. Thank you.
And thank you.
Okay.
- To Stone Lake! - (Together) Stone Lake.
Well, that'll sure quench your thirst.
- Can I talk to you? - I would like nothin' more.
Who are you?
(Chuckles) That's the best question anybody's thought to ask me...
since this whole thing started.
I'm your real father.
Not the best father, I know that.
Not as good a father as Michael's been to you up to now.
But I know that I can be.
See, I made a mistake a long time ago...
which I will regret for the rest of my life.
That's why I'm fighting for you. I know you think I'm hateful.
- But I gotta take that chance. - What was my mother like?
(Sighs) Your mother loved you, Mathilda.
And I love you too.
How did you treat my mother?
I treated her as best I could. I never hurt her.
I respected her. We just weren't meant
But she took drugs.
- You've heard how bad that can be, hmm? - Mm-hmm. (Crying)
Do you think that...
you could ever... live here?
Sometimes.
Mr. Newland, will you read the signature...
at the bottom of this hospital admittance form,
for a Miss Marsha Swanson?
(Whispering) Marsha Swanson.
- Uh, "Mr. Henry Swanson." - Who is Mr. Henry Swanson?
I am. I mean, I signed this paper using a different name.
- That is your handwriting? - Yes, it is.
I came to an arrangement with the mother
a monthly sum of money, and this would be our secret.
- And she agreed? - Yes, she did.
- And why did she agree? - Because she was a drug addict.
And you... what were you?
I was young, foolish and, uh...
I was afraid.
Looking back now, you see how foolish you were?
Yes, I do.
- No further questions. Your witness. - Mr. Newland...
the night that the child walked into Mr. McCann's house,
- Yes, I was. - And yet you said nothing?
- I felt that the child needed to be... - Mr. Newland, please.
just answer the question. You said nothing, am I right?
- Yes. - And by failing to claim
you neither asserted your parental rights nor fulfilled
Objection. Assumes facts not in evidence.
- Sustained. - I'll rephrase, Your Honor.
Mr. Newland...
you did not act as though you were the father.
You did not comfort her or hold her.
- Things a father might do. - No.
So, at that time, your feelings towards your
dictated your actions more than your feelings for your child.
Yes, but since that time, I have made sure
in this community where I could watch over her...
and make sure that she was taken care of.
Well, you're breakin' our hearts.
- Why did you start seeing the mother secretly?
Obvious to you maybe, Mr. Newland,
Because I felt that at the time she was not someone I was...
- Because you were in politics? - Yes.
- Better to lie to the public. - No, that's not...
Look, I made a mistake. I admit that.
You admit it because you have to admit it to look like
Is that why you were trying to pay her off? To get this
She was out of control. Addicts do not care about
Thank you, Mr. Newland.
(Judge Marcus) The witness may step down.
Call Michael McCann to the stand.
- (Clinking) - Ah, yes, I hit it! I get to keep it.
Haven't we done enough of these little girl stories?
Our only hope is that the two dads
May I ask what you earn a year?
Around $1 5,000.
How did you plan to send her to school?
There are scholarships. I can borrow.
I've always been there for her in the past...
and I believe I can be there for her when that time comes.
You believe. I have a belief too, Mr. McCann.
I believe that if this child were the responsibility
she would, without a doubt, attend the best schools;
without a doubt, be able to travel the world, ;
without a doubt, be given the opportunities
I object, Your Honor.! Where's the question?
Sustained. Get to the verb.
You feel thatJohn Newland abandoned his child, don't you?
Yes.
See, that sounds terrible, the way you put it...
when you leave out the details, the circumstances.
I admit it sounds bad, when you leave out the details.
You were married once, weren't you?
Yes.
And you left that marriage while your wife was pregnant.
Sh-she...
(Keating) Please answer the question only.!
- There were special circumstance... - Answer yes or no!
Objection!
(Spectators Murmuring)
Yes.
Now, in fairness, Mr. McCann...
there were circumstances that made you guiltless...
when you abandoned that child...
just as there are circumstances in Mr. Newland's case...
that would make any reasonable person understand
That is why we have to understand what kind of a man
And it makes me wonder... what kind of a man you were then.
Mr. McCann, I'm going to say some words.
And if you feel that these words inaccurately describe you at...
various times in your life, please stop me.
Poor.
Reclusive.
Unfriendly. Miserly.
Angry.
Lonely.
Were you lonely enough...
to seize a child to ease your selfish pain?
Lonely enough to bend the law?
To collaborate in stopping the natural process...
of finding a suitable home for this child?
I wonder how much you were in on this deception.
- Objection! - I'm finished, Your Honor.
(Spectators Murmuring)
- So is he. - (Judge Marcus)
(Keating) Hi, Mathilda.
Hi.
- How are you? - Not so good.
How's your horse?
How's Sparkle?
I don't know.
Will you tell us how you got Sparkle?
Mr. Newland gave him to me.
And you accepted it?
- Yes. - Did you tell your dad?
No.
So you had a secret gift from Mr. Newland...
your real father, that you didn't tell Mr. McCann?
Yes.
So you might say you had a special relationship
that you were... afraid to tell Mr. McCann about?
I wasn't afraid.
But you didn't tell him about the horse that
No.
Thank you, Mathilda.
I have no further questions, Your Honor.
How do you like being called Mathilda Newland?
It's not me.
- What do you like to be called? - Mathilda McCann.
Would you point to the man that you think of
And what is Mr. Newland to you?
I used to think of him as a nice man.
- What do you think of him now? - As somebody who's trying
How would you feel, Mathilda, if you were separated
(Sobbing) l-l...
I could never be separated from him.
He's the one who's taken care of me.
He's the one who's inspired me.
And now that I'm entering my years of womanhood...
I'm going to need his guidance more than ever.
I could never be anything without my lovin' daddy!
(Spectators Murmuring)
- (Sniffing) - (Mathilda Sniffling)
- (Murmuring Continues) - (Woman) Poor child.!
(Mathilda Sobbing Loudly)
(Sobbing Continues)
(Mathilda Wailing)
(Laughing)
- I want to be an actress! - Shhh!
(Bailiff) This court will please come to order.
Y-you better go to school.
Do good, Pops. You and me.
You and me.
(Playing "Past Three O'Clock")
(Continues)
I didn't tell you about the horse.
I should've...
but I wanted it.
I know you did.
- There's a problem, though. - What's that?
I still want it.
(Groans) I got a headache.
And so you should.
I can't believe I have to give her to that...
Oh, Marcus, baloney! You'd sell your mother for cat food.
(Sighs) Oh.
Do somethin'right for once.
Oh, I can't go against Newland.
There's too much goin' way back, father to father.
Now son to son.
How can I ask her to, to live in squalor?
(Inhales) No, I can't give her to McCann,
Powerful reason.
(Bailiff) The court will now
- (Gavel Pounds) - (Judge Marcus)
But fiirst, I would like to explain my thinking.
And perhaps you'll understand what a difficult
We have a man who has raised a child
generously and lovingly.
That child has turned out to be well brought up.
Not something easy to do in today's world.
I would like to explain to you what it was
That something was not concerning the happiness
That is impossible to quantify.
I am very clearly directed to look at the welfare
which can be very coldly calculated
She will need money for her education...
for her protection as an adult.
Hey, hey, hey! Hey, come back here!
- (Indistinct Shouting) - It would be irresponsible of me...
- (Car Horn Honking) - To deny this child
- To the wealth which is offered her. - (Tires Screeching)
- (Spectators Murmuring) - If it were...
otherwise so, believe me...
not only would I be inclined to go the other way...
- But my heart would want it that way. - (Tires Screeching)
(Spectators Chattering)
What is goin'on out there?
Young man. Wait. Hey! Hey! Wait! Wait.
(Judge Marcus) Come here, boy.
Come here!
(Whispering)
- Well, let's go see what this is. Court is recessed for one hour.
- All rise. - The hell with that. Let's go!
(T.V. Reporter) Apparently, we were waiting
when an occurrence happened in the courtroom.
A young... as a matter of fact, here he is. Uh, young man...
- (Indistinct Chatter) - Over here, Judge.
- (Siren Wailing) - What's going on? What's happening?
Everybody's rushing around.
(Siren Wailing)
(Chattering, Shouting)
(Indistinct Murmuring)
Oh, careful. Ohh!
Bingo!
- (Woman) Tanny? - (Crowd Murmuring)
(Man) Thought he was in Rio or someplace in South America.
Poor guy must've just fallen in.
As a Judge, I'm always interested...
in the exact moment when someone's argument falls apart.
- (Man) McCann's got his gold back. - (Murmuring Continues)
(Wind Whistling)
Sorry about what happened to your brother, Mr. Newland.
Thank you.
Mathilda.
I'll see you around.
(Man) Yeah, we get a few folks like you each year...
lookin' for someone.
Everybody's lookin' for someone.
This is the last place they look.
That's for sure.
The last place they look.
Right over there, folks.