- What are you doing, Doc? - An auditory exam.
- Did I pass? - With flying colours.
Which leads me to believe you heard me when I requested you meet me.
- You're right. I forgot. - I see.
I realise your sickbay training is voluntary,
but you haven't spent any time there in several weeks.
You're always in the holodeck.
We haven't been treating anything more serious than an ingrown toenail.
If an emergency were to happen, you must be prepared.
You're too far behind with your medical texts to be wasting your time.
I have spent most of the morning
immersed in a complicated surgical procedure.
A classic case of atrophied shocks.
They needed to be extracted to prevent chrome abrasion.
It was touch and go, but the prognosis is excellent.
You'll be ready for neurosurgery in no time.
Take a look at this, Doc.
This is a fully stock, 1969 Chevy Camaro,
one of the earliest muscle cars ever made.
Imagine - Northern California, late 20th Century.
You're cruising up Highway One,
the wind is whipping through your hair...
Medieval safety constraints,
internal combustion system producing lethal levels of carbon monoxide.
This may be just what you need to get you back to sickbay.
I knew this wouldn't interest you. It's too much fun.
This isn't about fun. Serving in sickbay is a privilege.
- I'd expect you to realise that. - Oh, I do.
I'll be there. Soon.
Lieutenant Paris, report to the bridge immediately.
I'm on my way.
- Somebody call for a driver? - Take your station, Tom.
Anything on scans, Harry?
I'm picking up another spatial distortion, 2,000 kilometres away.
It looks like space is folding in on itself.
Shields to full.
It's an alien vessel, one occupant aboard.
It looks like that ship is being powered by a coaxial warp drive.
- Coaxial what? - A hypothetical propulsion system.
Starfleet engineers have dreamt about it for years.
It can fold space,
allowing a ship to travel instantaneously across huge distances.
- The alien warp drive is overloading. - A coaxial drive explosion
could collapse space within a radius of a billion kilometres.
- In theory. - Let's keep that from becoming reality.
Red Alert.
Scan the vessel.
- Can we beam the pilot out? - Too much interference.
That ship's about had it.
The coaxial core is breaching.
We should vacate this area.
We can't just leave him.
Try one more hail.
Nothing. Maybe he's ignoring us.
We've got to do something.
Suggestions?
A symmetric warp field
should contain any instabilities.
How can you be sure?
Advanced subspace geometry,
the one course where I paid attention.
We'll tractor him in, generate a warp field around his ship.
His flight path is erratic. We'd be risking collision.
- I can make this work. - Do it.
Passing through the residual folds.
Steady.
Got him!
I've extended our warp field.
His core is powering down.
- Nice flying, Tom. - My pleasure.
- We're finally receiving a hail. - Open a channel.
Captain Janeway, Federation starship Voyager. Do you need attention?
I'm fine, Captain.
Unfortunately, my ship is not.
- We might be able to help. - That's very generous.
We'll beam you aboard. Stand by.
Tuvok.
Energise.
Welcome.
You put yourselves in danger.
- I want to thank you. - I'm glad we could help.
I was so eager to test my new engine, I pushed it beyond its limits.
Coaxial warp doesn't seem the smoothest way to travel.
It's violent, but it allows a ship to travel at incredible speeds.
Considering the dangers, this method of travel hardly seems logical.
True, but if I worried about danger, I wouldn't have become a test pilot.
Where are you from?
The Benthan system, about 20 light years from here.
I'll speak to my engineers.
Without your coaxial drive, it's a long way home.
Come in.
I'd like to ask a favour.
I'd like to help Steth repair his ship.
- This isn't a good time to ask. - What do you mean?
A report from the Doctor. You didn't show up today.
I was a little busy this morning saving someone's life.
Is there something wrong? Anything bothering you?
Nothing is wrong.
Is not wanting to spend time with the Doctor an offence?
You'd have to throw the whole crew in the brig for that.
I was just wondering if there's something on your mind.
You do what's required, but your heart isn't in it.
You seem preoccupied.
I think I need a change of pace.
You're a different man from the one four years ago.
You've turned yourself around. I'd hate to see you ruin it.
I won't.
With your permission, I'll report to sickbay.
Permission denied.
Report to Steth's ship instead. Assist in the repairs.
We need our best man on the job.
I made the mistake of flying the prototype
through restricted Entaban territory.
And the Entabans weren't too pleased to see me.
I limped back to Benthos
with phaser holes through their brand new fuselage.
They would have been happier to see phaser holes through me.
When I was 16, I followed an ancient human custom.
I took my father's shuttle out for a joyride and fried the relays.
He wasn't happy about getting it back?
He didn't. As far as I know, it's still at the bottom of Lake Tahoe.
Here it is. A coaxial induction drive.
It draws in subatomic particles and reconfigures their geometries.
- This makes folding space possible? - In spurts.
Unfortunately, particle instabilities keep overloading my engines.
But I'm going to make it work. I don't like the thought of settling down.
Too many new ships to drive, too many intriguing women.
I guess so.
When I get this ship back, I'll be doing the first test on a new fighter.
It's more advanced than any warship in the quadrant.
Why don't you come with me? We'd have a great time.
You can meet up with Voyager afterwards.
I'd love to do that. It sounds very exciting.
But I have responsibilities here, people who count on me.
And B'Elanna would be furious.
B'Elanna.
I have to go.
- You started without me. - I finished without you.
- You're a little late. - Sorry.
I was helping Steth repair his ship.
- How's it going? - Pretty slow.
We're both stuck on how to prevent the particle overloads.
Have you tried an isokinetic containment field?
That's the first thing we tried.
- How long will these repairs take? - I don't know.
I was hoping that you could help me recalibrate the plasma manifolds.
I er...
I probably should go help Steth.
Tom, is there something wrong?
- Why are you interrogating me? - I didn't think I was.
- You want me to account for my time. - That's ridiculous.
Can't I do what I want without having to report every detail of it to you?
Tom, I just wanted to know if there was something wrong.
You hide out for hours on the holodeck.
I am not hiding anything.
You haven't even told me what holodeck program this is.
- "The Dancing Girls of Ninipia Prime". - Very funny.
- You're overreacting. - I am not overreacting.
There's something going on and you refuse to admit it.
- Can I get you something, Tom? - I'm really not hungry.
Are you going to talk to me about this?
If you can carry on an adult conversation...
Goodnight, Tom.
Computer, run a DNA stability analysis.
How long before my genome reverts to its previous form?
Time to reversion - three hours, 13 minutes.
Complete genome recovery is imminent.
I was lying in bed when it hit me.
- What you need is a carburettor. - A carburettor?
It's a device that's hundreds of years old.
Hundreds of years old? Surely that couldn't be of use to us now?
You would be surprised at how often
I find solutions to 24th-Century problems in 20th-Century technology.
Computer, access Paris program alpha-1 "Grease Monkey".
- Grease Monkey? - Mechanic lingo.
A car can't run on pure fuel
so the carburettor supplies it with a mixture of fuel and air.
You think we need a device like that to dilute the particle stream?
A polaric modulator from Voyager's impulse drive should do the trick.
Subatomic dilution! It never would have occurred to me.
I think you've solved it.
We can run a few simulations before we try it.
- I owe you a lot. - Thank my lucky toolbox.
It's gotten me out of hot water more than once.
You're lucky to be stationed on a ship like this.
Replicators to feed and clothe you, holotechnology to cater to every whim.
- Hallways filled with women. - Yeah, it's great.
You don't sound convinced. Aren't you happy here?
Of course I'm happy. I'm very happy.
I mean, I pilot one of the most advanced ships in Starfleet,
I have a beautiful girlfriend, I'm respected.
I have everything that I've ever wanted.
You're lucky.
You're part of a family, part of a structure.
You have rules to guide you. You don't have to worry about choices.
I go to bed not knowing what the next day has in store,
what trouble I might get into.
You don't have to worry about those things. You're very settled.
I remember those days. I used to be a lot like you.
Going anywhere, doing whatever I wanted.
Making my own rules.
Then there's hope for me yet. Maybe some day I'll settle down, too.
But for now, I prefer to stay on the move.
Sometimes I wish that's what I was doing.
Things will turn around for you.
Change is inevitable. It comes when you least expect it.
Yeah, I suppose.
Are we ready to try this carburettor idea on my ship?
Give me five more minutes and I'll be right with you.
And, Tom...
Don't dismiss the suggestion about coming with me to fly the new ship.
It might be fun to escape the shackles for a while.
Huh.
Computer, access all files pertaining to Lieutenant Tom Paris.
- Download into memory core Alpha. - Please enter authorisation code.
Access granted. Commencing download.
Hello. I'm Steth, a guest of your captain.
You are not authorised to access the ship's computers.
You must be Seven of Nine.
Tom mentioned you. He thinks you're extremely intelligent.
Lieutenant Paris' opinion of me is irrelevant to your being in this room.
Tom felt we needed some files for polaric modulators,
but he was called away. I thought I'd find them myself.
He must be present to download these files.
I'm about to meet him at the holodeck.
Voyager's hierarchy is complex. See that you familiarise yourself with it.
Good advice. I'll do that.
Captain's log, stardate 51762.4.
The repairs to Steth's coaxial drive have been completed ahead of schedule.
Everything here looks good.
Give me one more second to check the flow field parameters.
My box wrench. I've been looking for this.
I should have asked you, Tom, but I needed it for an experiment.
To check your new carburettor?
Not quite. You're the first humans I've met.
That wrench had enough cellular residue on it to check your DNA.
I have good news.
We're compatible.
Consider this a favour.
I know how unhappy you've been with this dreary life,
so I'm taking it off your hands.
There's still some fun to be had here.
Voyager is a great ship, Tom. I'll take good care of it.
Sorry I'm late.
We were beginning to wonder if you were ever coming back.
His ship is powering engines.
- Something wrong, Tom? - It's nothing.
I'm just really gonna miss that guy.
- Mind if I join you? - Not at all, Commander.
Chakotay will do, Tom. You don't have to carry this rules thing too far.
I've been discussing your report with the captain.
She wants to implement some of Steth's technology.
Really?
We thought you could start on a shuttle. Do you think you can do it?
- I'm sure I can. - Great.
- Start after you finish with the Doctor. - The Doctor?
He needs your help in sickbay. I told him you'd be there.
Of course.
- Lieutenant. - Hi.
Don't tell me you've forgotten where sickbay is?
Not yet. I was trying to figure out if there's a more efficient route
between sickbay and my quarters.
I didn't realise you were that eager to get there.
So tell me, are they ready yet?
Not yet, but they will be soon.
Great. Let me know if you have any problems.
- Polyduranide can be tough to replicate. - Sure can be.
I can't wait to get those clubs. Ensign Kaplan won't know what hit her.
What?
We're going to play golf with her. We scheduled a rematch.
Of course. I can't wait.
You missed both those two-footers last time.
I won't let it happen again.
- Give the Doc my best. - I will.
If I ever find him.
You're early, Mr Paris.
I see some good came from my report to Commander Chakotay.
Begin with a bio-bed diagnostic. Recalibrate each physiosensor,
making sure to enter every metabolic referent precisely.
Then run a protein structure analysis and continue your review
of the 37 steps of a cardiopulmonary reconstruction procedure.
Did you forget to disengage the scan emitters?
- Mr Paris. - I don't know what's wrong.
- It's complicated, but you must try again. - Actually... I'm not feeling so well.
How fortunate you're here. I'll run a few scans.
No, Doc. That's all right. To be perfectly honest with you...
This is so frustrating for me. I usually pick things up a lot faster.
You're here to learn, Mr Paris. It will get easier with time.
- That's easy for you to say. - Excuse me?
No offence, Doctor, but you were programmed to be a medical genius.
I'm just a pilot. A grease monkey.
As hard as I might try to become a better assistant,
it's clear to me that I'll never be half the healer that you are.
Do you mean to tell me you've been trying to live up to my standards?
- I'm afraid I have. - It all makes sense now.
The misplaced aggression, the shirking of responsibilities.
All classic signs of an inferiority complex.
I had no idea my superior abilities were affecting your psyche so strongly.
Take the rest of the day off. Reflect on your strengths.
Realise your worth.
I'll do that, Doctor. Thank you.
B'Elanna.
- What do you think you're doing? - Putting.
- In my quarters? - I can't putt in your quarters?
- No. - Since when?
Tom.
What is this?
That is a sand wedge. It's used for getting out of traps.
- Why is it here? - I replicated it for you.
I thought we could play a game of golf before dinner.
So this is your idea of an adult conversation?
I don't know what you are trying to accomplish,
but it is not working.
I am sorry if you are bored because Steth is gone,
but that doesn't mean you can pretend you haven't been shutting me out.
You're being a little hard on Steth.
If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't be here right now.
Really?
I mentioned to him that we were having some problems
and he urged me to come and talk to you,
to try to work things out, to admit I was wrong.
I made a mistake, B'Elanna. And I'm sorry.
I won't shut you out any more.
In fact, I went to the Doctor
and begged to be excused from my duties.
I realise it's only a few extra hours,
but they're hours I want to spend with you.
Steth turned out to be a positive influence on you.
Computer...
Computer, where are we?
'Navigation matrix 1711. The Kotaba Expanse.
- Coaxial leap complete. - How far are we from Voyager?
Lock in Voyager's last co-ordinates and activate induction drive.
- Unable to execute command. - Why not?
The drive has been secured.
A security code is required to implement the coaxial leap.
This is Commander Avik of the Benthan Guard.
Prepare to surrender the vessel to us at once.
I need a second to explain, Commander. I'm not who...
We do not negotiate with thieves.
You don't understand. I need this ship to get back to Voyager.
Surrender the vessel or we will use force.
- Why is everybody trying to shoot me? - You know why I'm here.
I don't know what you're talking about. Who are you?
- I'm Steth. - What?
You wore this body for nearly a year
before you switched it with mine.
That's my body you're in now. I want it back.
Bear with me. We have more in common than you might think.
This better be good. I left Vorik in the middle of an EPS recalibration.
- You can thank me later. - So what's my big surprise?
What would you say to 24 glorious hours
on the famed fourth planet of the Kendren System?
The planet where Neelix is gathering food samples?
I ran a few scans and found the most incredible beach.
I replicated a picnic lunch for us.
Voyager isn't leaving orbit until tomorrow. We'd have an entire day.
Only a day?
I think that we would need at least a week.
I wish we could, but we've only got a day.
- You're serious, aren't you? - Completely.
Do you know how much trouble we would be in?
What could Janeway do? Execute us?
I can't get away for an hour, let alone 24.
I have responsibilities here, we both do.
- I don't care! - Tom, you're hurting me.
You're a real disappointment to me, do you know that?
I don't know what I ever saw in you.
Seven, what brings you here at this hour?
We were supposed to meet at 2100 hours.
- Did you forget? - I did.
I got so caught up with my reading it slipped my mind. Sorry.
The capillaries in your eyes are swollen
and I see signs of vascular congestion.
- Are you intoxicated? - No, not at all.
I was just exploring the replicator, trying some alien beverages.
You are not officially off-duty for another 78 minutes.
I'm on break. Would you like to join me?
- I could replicate an ale for you. - That will not be necessary.
Relax, Seven. You're not on the Borg cube any more.
- We could finish our work tomorrow. - That would be inefficient.
I will complete the work myself.
Fine.
Before I leave, why were you reading the captain's logs?
- I wasn't. - I saw the padd.
It was unmistakeably the captain's logs.
You're wrong. You couldn't possibly have seen anything.
You know I require only seconds to commit what I see to memory.
Shall I quote the passage you were reading?
Stay out of my way! Don't interfere in things that don't concern you.
If you bother me again, I will make things very unpleasant.
- Remove your hand from my arm. - Don't be foolish. You'll regret it.
Enter.
You wanted to see me, Captain?
Yes.
I received a rather disturbing report from Seven of Nine.
She claims you were drinking on duty.
- She's mistaken, Captain. - Don't lie to me, Tom.
I checked the computers.
You replicated five alcoholic beverages in the mess hall.
- She also said you threatened her. - I'm sorry, Captain.
B'Elanna and I had an argument.
- Is that why you read my logs? - I didn't!
Seven recited a passage word for word.
She probably accessed those files herself.
You can't take the word of a Borg over mine.
Your conduct lately has been bizarre.
I've heard too many complaints to dismiss it.
Chakotay, the Doctor, Seven. They're worried about you.
And so am I.
You're right, Captain. I need some rest.
Tom.
As your captain and as your friend, I want you to report to sickbay.
We have to find out if there's something physical causing this behaviour.
This is crazy. I don't need any help.
That's an order.
Security, I need you in the ready room now.
- Are you hurt, Captain? - No.
Take him to sickbay. Keep security with him.
The coaxial drive will be on-line in a few minutes.
I've overridden the lock-out commands.
I'd like to get out of your body as soon as possible.
The alien seems capable of selective DNA exchange.
He absorbs new DNA while depositing his genetic material into his victims.
Let's hope he can reverse that process.
That's the last command. We're set for coaxial warp.
Let's find Voyager.
Captain's log, supplemental. The Doctor has treated Mr Paris,
but has been unable to wake him. The motive for his attack is a mystery.
Scans yielded very little,
but I did find something very interesting in his blood analysis.
There are traces of a second DNA pattern in his nucleotide structure.
- Could this cause his behaviour? - I don't know.
I'm running scans to see how this might affect his neurological functions.
Captain, a vessel just emerged from coaxial space.
Keep me informed, Doctor.
Hail them.
- Captain Janeway. - Welcome back, Mr Steth.
I know this sounds crazy, but I am not Steth.
- I'm Tom Paris. - I beg your pardon?
We're dealing with an identity thief. He traded places with me.
Please beam us aboard.
Maintain your position while we consider your request. End transmission.
Hold them in a tractor beam until you hear from me.
Steth and his friend are behind what's happened to Tom.
No time to explain. I'll be in sickbay.
Captain?
I'm reading an unauthorised shuttle launch.
It's the captain.
- Try hailing her. - She's not responding.
Hail Steth's ship.
I don't know who you are, but I want to know what's happening.
- Who's on that shuttle? - Captain Janeway.
I'm betting the alien switched my body, Tom's body, for hers.
Let us out of this tractor beam. We can catch her with this ship.
- Chakotay, it's me. - How do I know that?
The other day you told me I'd turned my life around.
Give me the chance to prove it.
It is the only way we can get everybody back into the right body.
Harry, disengage the tractor beam.
- 20,000 kilometres and closing. - Has he detected us yet?
I'd say he has.
I advise you to reconsider this pursuit.
Killing me will keep you trapped in those bodies.
- We can't risk killing him. - Nothing's keeping him from killing us.
- Damn! This ship's not manoeuvrable. - Shields are down.
I'm surprised you're eager to reclaim your life, Tom.
I was as disappointed with it as you.
- Then I guess we were both wrong. - It's time to move on again.
Be sure to send my best regards to B'Elanna.
- He's charging the coaxial drive. - Track him.
He's blocking us.
We won't be able to follow him once he goes into coaxial warp.
- We're losing him. - The carburettor!
We added a polaric modulator to the coaxial drive.
If I can target the modulator, that'll disrupt his engines.
Here goes.
I hope you still have my box wrench. Carburettors can be a pain to fix.
Captain's log, stardate 51775.2.
While the intruder remains trapped in the body of his last victim,
the Doctor has found a way to return Tom, Steth and me to our own bodies.
Doctor, I can't thank you enough.
- You've given me my life back. - All in a day's work.
I thought I would be stuck in that body forever.
I'm just as happy to be back to the old Tom Paris.
- What do you plan to do? - I'm going to take her to Bentha.
I hope to find the person who belongs to that body.
We have no idea how long she or he has been switching identities.
It may take a while,
but I will do whatever I can to find everyone you've violated.
Security will escort her to your ship
and erect a force field to contain her.
This is where you've been hiding? A garage.
It's more than just a garage.
This is a monument to hundreds and hundreds of hours
that I probably should have spent with you.
- Probably? - Definitely.
It's a lovely garage, Tom,
but I don't understand why you brought me here.
Consider it a symbolic gesture.
It's my less than subtle attempt to let you in.
I see. To make it clear that I mean almost as much to you as...
...a Camaro.
It's a mint condition, 1969...
...Camaro.
And yes, you mean a lot more to me.
English (en)