Sorry I'm late, but I have a very good excuse.
Picture this. I'm getting ready to leave the mess hall,
when Ensign Wildman goes into labour.
What else could I do, but deliver the baby?
There is nothing like bringing a new life into the world.
I think I missed my calling.
What if I told you the turbolift got stuck on deck 67.
This is the third time you've been late.
It won't happen again.
I am picking up a distress call on one of the upper subspace bands.
A small spacecraft is the source.
One life-form aboard. Weak lifesigns.
According to the bioscanner, it's a Vidiian female.
- Open a channel. - No response.
- She may be too sick. - Or maybe it's some kind of trick.
Scans show no Vidiian ships in this sector. It is unlikely this is a trap.
Chakotay, notify the Doctor. Mr Kim, beam the woman to sickbay.
Her renal organs are at 20% of normal
and her cardiovascular system is about to collapse.
20 milligrams of lectrazine.
Cardiovascular and renal systems stabilising, but neural patterns fading.
- What is it? - In her parietal lobe.
It looks like some sort of implant.
It's a very complex web of bio-neural circuitry. Nanofibres...
- Could this be causing the problem? - On the contrary.
The device is actually storing her synaptic patterns, processing them
and transmitting neural electrical impulses.
- Is it an artificial brain? - No.
It's a neuro-cortical stimulator, designed to supplement brain functions.
But it's not working any more.
The implant is functioning, but it's connected to dead nerve cells.
If we don't do something, she'll be braindead in minutes.
What about stimulating cell regeneration with inaprovaline?
Very impressive, but it's too late for that.
Get me a high-frequency RF transmitter.
Hurry. Her brain function is diminishing rapidly.
Set the delta-band frequency of the holo-emitter to 8.6 tetrahertz.
We are transferring her synaptic patterns into the holo-buffer.
Is there enough storage capacity for complex data patterns?
There's enough capacity for my program.
My program contains over 50 million gigaquads of data,
which is more than humanoid brains.
Why preserve her synaptic patterns if there's no body?
I'm creating a holographic body.
We will be able to communicate with her
and have a model of Vidiian physiology that will aid in treating her.
Computer, project the patient's skeletal structure.
Now add internal organs.
Add musculature.
Now apply epidermal layers.
Computer, use transporter records to recreate the patient's clothing.
According to navigational logs, she was en route to a Vidiian colony.
- Are we near it? - It's ten light years away.
We should be in the vicinity in 22 days.
Assuming she survives and we take security precautions,
we'll turn her over when we get there.
- Captain. - Is there something wrong?
I wanted to talk to you about Paris.
His attitude lately has been less than professional.
I know discipline's my responsibility,
but I should let you get involved
before I took action.
Paris has been your reclamation project.
I appreciate your bringing this to my attention,
but I trust you to handle the problem any way you see fit.
Chief Medical Officer's log, supplemental.
The holographic body is functioning normally.
The patient's synaptic patterns are stable,
so I'm ready to transfer her cognitive and motor processes.
- Who are you? - The Chief Medical Officer
of the Federation starship Voyager.
We received your distress call.
What have you done to me?
I used chromosomes in your cerebellum to recreate your DNA code
and then programmed the computer to project a holographic template.
Holographic?
A three-dimensional projection of light and energy.
See for yourself.
Your neural patterns were degrading rapidly.
It was too late to use inaprovaline, so I improvised.
Not that it would occur to just any physician.
- Why are you crying? - I'm sorry.
- I thought you'd be pleased. - Lam.
I never expected to look healthy again.
I've been sick for so long.
I need your medical history. How long have you been ill?
I was first diagnosed with the phage when I was seven.
When did you receive replacement tissue?
About that same time. It was hard to get used to the changes,
but after a while I almost stopped noticing. I never...
I never thought I'd see myself again.
Thank you. It's the most extraordinary thing anyone has ever done for me.
I wouldn't be too grateful. There are serious limitations.
We can only exist within environments with holo-emitters, such as the sickbay.
You're...
An Emergency Medical Holographic Program.
You're a computer simulation?
An incredibly sophisticated computer simulation.
I'm sorry. What did you say your name was?
I don't have a name. It wasn't part of my original program.
- However you, I'm sure, have one. - Danara.
- Danara Pel. - Well, Miss Pel.
What were you doing alone in space with no access to medical care?
I was treating an outbreak of the phage on Fina Prime.
I was on my way back, but my condition got worse.
You're a medical practitioner?
A haematologist.
Given your expertise, you can help me with your treatment.
- My treatment? I feel fine. - That's only temporary.
Your synaptic patterns will degrade if we don't get them back into your brain.
- How long? - A few days. Perhaps a week.
Your real body is in stasis.
We have to find a way to repair your damaged neural tissue.
- Is something wrong? - It's nothing.
- I'm eager to discuss treatments. - Of course.
The procedure is simple.
I drill an opening in your skull two millimetres in diameter
and extract a sample of your parietal lobe, weighing one gram.
It doesn't sound simple to me. I have nightmares about what they did to me
and you want to crack open my head,
cut out a piece of my brain and give it to HER!
Your experience suggests Klingon DNA is resistant to the phage.
Losing some neural tissue is inconsequential.
Yet that same tissue, grafted onto the patient's brain,
will slow the spread of her infection.
If we can increase the grafted tissue mass,
we can transfer her synaptic patterns back into her brain.
It won't cure the phage, but it should prolong her life.
Please, change into a surgical gown and lie down on bio-bed number 1.
Excuse me.
I've read about the experiments that were done on you.
- What you went through was traumatic. - That is an understatement.
Please understand this disease has killed my people for hundreds of years.
Trying to stop it is an obsession.
Our scientists don't have compassion for the people who keep us alive.
As much as I want to go on living, I've accepted the fact I will die soon.
I only want your help if you are willing to give it.
Of course... I'd like to help you, if I can.
If you have any questions at all, I'd be happy to answer them for you.
I'll go and get changed.
I've finished ingrafting the neural tissue to your cerebral cortex.
I'll create an axonal pathway between it and your basal ganglia.
- Your technique is impressive. - It's my programming.
This procedure was developed by Dr Leonard McCoy in the year 2253.
I'm equipped with the medical knowledge of more than 3,000 cultures.
Additionally, as you see here, my imaging system allows me to perform
and improve upon the most delicate tactile manoeuvres
required by an array of surgical procedures.
- Incredible. - Hand me the submicron suture, please.
There. That should do it.
- Excellent work. - I was only assisting.
That assistance was invaluable.
It will be a few days before we'll know if it will hold.
Perhaps I should deactivate your program temporarily.
- Do you have to? - It would slow the degradation.
I have so much energy. Maybe it's the excitement of the surgery,
or maybe it's this new body.
What I'd like to do is take a walk and see the rest of your ship.
Unfortunately, that's not possible.
If you're want something to do, use my office to access our medical database.
You'll find texts on comparative endocrinology.
All right. Thank you.
On second thought, there is someplace else we could go.
It's wonderful. If I had a place like this to go to, I'd be there every day.
Don't your people have recreational facilities?
Congregating in groups is regulated. It's considered a threat to public health.
A wise policy.
My people spend so much time trying to save lives, they don't know how to live.
Doctor! Aren't you going to introduce me to your date?
She's not my date. She's my patient.
- I'm sorry. I didn't realise. - Mr Neelix, this is Dr Danara Pel.
As Chief Morale Officer, may I be the first to welcome you to Voyager.
Madame, your loveliness illuminates our dark little cavern.
May I have the next dance?
Go away. You're disturbing my patient.
You are just jealous because you cannot dance.
Let's go. You're making the lady nervous.
Nice to meet you.
- I apologise. - No. They were just being nice.
Irritating, isn't it?
I guess I'm just not used to so much attention.
Where I come from, when you're as sick as I am,
healthy people stay away from you.
I guess...
...I forgot for a second that I don't look like that any more.
It's a natural response.
All this talk about me. There's still so much I'd like to know about you.
There's not much to tell, really.
My program was developed by Dr Louis Zimmerman on Jupiter Station.
I was activated on stardate 48308.
Since that time I've performed 347 medical exams,
healed 11 compound fractures, performed 3 appendectomies,
and in my greatest feat of medical prowess, I cured Mr Neelix of hiccups.
- You're very funny. - Lam?
Several clinical studies have shown humour to be therapeutic.
Consider it part of our treatment.
- What is it? - It's just that...
I haven't laughed in a very long time. Thank you.
What did that man mean when he said you can't dance?
That's dancing.
And you can't do it?
It's not part of my programming.
I see.
- Well, Dr Pel... - Please, call me Danara.
As you wish, Danara.
And what about you? What should I call you?
- Well, as I said... - I know. You don't have a name.
Is it all right if I gave you one?
- Well, I... - How about... Shmullus.
- Shmullus? - It was my uncle's name.
He used to make me laugh, too.
Dr Shmullus. I think I like the sound of that.
Well...
Here we are.
Yes, here we are.
Danara, we should... deactivate you for eight hours.
- If you think it's best. - I do.
- All right. - All right. Computer...
- Shmullus. - Yes.
I had a wonderful time.
I'm pleased.
Thank you... for everything.
Thank you for... giving me a name.
Well, good night, Danara.
Good night, Shmullus.
Computer, deactivate Vidiian Program Alpha.
Mind if I join you?
- So how are things, Tom? - Excuse me?
How have you been feeling lately?
No offence, Commander, but why this sudden concern for my feelings?
Well, you've been indifferent to your duties.
To be honest, you don't seem to be taking your job seriously.
If you've got a problem, I'd like to know.
Yeah, I've got a problem.
My problem is you.
You care to elaborate?
You tell me I don't take my job seriously. But you don't let me do my job.
- What does that mean? - You don't trust my judgment.
I'm not allowed to take initiative.
Last week I suggested we travel through an emissions nebula.
What did you say? "That's not the way we do things on this ship."
Sometimes I won't agree with suggestions.
Making decisions is part of being a leader. Someday you'll understand that.
Being a leader also means knowing when to let your people be creative.
We might as well be on autopilot for all the freedom you give me.
I didn't come here for a lecture from you.
I know you don't put much stock in my opinion.
You should talk to some of these people, I'm not the only one with a problem.
If there's nothing else, sir, I'd like to be excused.
Sure, Paris. You're excused.
Dissension among the Voyager crew.
Maje Culluh will find that interesting. Good work, Mr Jonas.
There's something else you can do.
We want you to create a small accident to damage Voyager's warp coils.
- Why? - No need to concern yourself with that.
You just plan the accident. We'll let you know when we want it to happen.
- Do we understand each other? - I want to talk to Seska.
- I'm afraid Maje Culluh... - Tell him I won't damage Voyager.
If he has a problem with that, have Seska contact me.
- When you have a minute... - I'm running a self-diagnostic.
- I'll be there soon. - Why are you running a diagnostic?
I've had lapses in concentration and difficulty handling objects.
There may be a malfunction in my tactile acuity subroutine.
- How long has it been going on? - Two or three days.
- Since Danara came aboard. - What's your point?
Maybe she's the reason you feel this way.
- I fail to see a connection. - Maybe you're attracted to her.
My program's malfunctioning.
- Romance is not a malfunction. - It is not in my programming.
- Your programming's adaptive, isn't it? - Yes.
- Then I'd say it's adapting. - What if...
...I don't want it to adapt?
- Why wouldn't you? - I don't like what's happening to me.
I'm used to being in control of my faculties, confident of my decisions.
But lately, whenever Danara's program is deactivated
and I should be concentrating on work...
I find myself thinking of nothing but her.
Why don't you reactivate her?
Whenever I do that, I suddenly feel...
...unsettled, unsure of myself, and I have no idea what to say.
Why do people seek out situations which induce unpleasant symptoms?
When the other person feels the same, it's a wonderful thing.
- Suppose, hypothetically, of course... - Of course.
...wanted to pursue that possibility, how do I proceed?
You'd have to tell her how you feel.
That's it? Just tell her how I feel?
Or you may never know how she feels.
I'm going to try stimulating your motor neurons.
Well, the nucleus cuneatus appears to be functioning normally.
And now for the anterior thalamic pathway.
Excellent. By the way, Danara, I've been meaning to tell you.
I'm attracted to you and wanted to know if you felt the same.
Is something wrong?
No. I...
Did you understand what I said?
Yes.
- Well? - Doctor, maybe now isn't the time to...
Excuse me, Kes. I was speaking to Danara.
I think it's best if we keep our relationship professional.
I'm going to...
...try stimulating the posterior sciatic nerve.
Doc, what brings you here? Is somebody sick?
- Actually I was looking for you. - Well, pull up a chair.
I assume you've had a great deal of experience being rejected by women.
Thanks a lot, Doc.
What I'd like to know is, what does one do to recover from romantic rejection?
- Why the interest in romance? - I can't tell you.
It's a matter of doctor-patient confidentiality.
All right. Well, let's see.
Sometimes there's not a lot you can do to get over a woman you care about.
I remember when Susie Crabtree dumped me
in my first year at the Academy. I broke out in hives.
Couldn't get out of bed for a week. I almost failed Stellar Cartography.
I walked around in a daze for the rest of the year.
Of course, the first one is always the hardest to get over.
I see.
But eventually, you start thinking about her less and less.
Until finally, without realising it, she's not on your mind.
So the symptoms do subside over time?
For the most part.
But every now and then, even years later, something reminds you of her.
A certain smell, a few notes of a song
and you feel as bad as the day she never wanted to see you again.
If you want to know the truth, Doc,
you never completely get over a woman you really cared about.
Wait a minute, Doc. We're not talking about you, are we?
- I told you, it was confidential. - Boy, you've got it bad.
Look, I don't mean to intrude. If you tell me what's going on, I can help.
- Hello, Kes. - Are you feeling all right?
I'm fine. I'm just.. Waiting for the Doctor.
He's been gone a long time.
You really like him, don't you?
Then why didn't you tell him that you felt the same the way
when he said he was attracted to you?
It all happened so fast. He just blurted it out.
He's very blunt. Don't take it personally.
How could he possibly have those feelings about me?
Maybe because you're a compassionate person,
a brilliant doctor, you appreciate his humour.
- Should I go on? - Please don't.
You're not very good at accepting a compliment.
Next time someone says something nice,
take them at their word and feel good about yourself.
It's not easy to feel good about yourself when you live your life like that.
Danara, I don't know what your life's been like.
But there's nothing sadder than a missed opportunity.
Maybe you and the Doctor need to spend time together alone.
It sounds like she might be shy. I think you scared her off.
I did?
Your approach is all wrong.
- What would be the right approach? - Women like romance.
They want men to take them someplace special.
Where would I take her?
Come with me, Doc. I've got an idea.
Doctor's Personal Log, stardate 49504.3.
Inaugural entry.
Kes and Mr Paris have conspired to get Danara and me alone
in a place Paris considers romantic.
I've never felt more... uneasy.
- I wasn't sure you were coming. - Neither was I.
- If you don't want to be here... - No. I do.
Where are we exactly?
On a planet called Mars, inside a primitive land-based vehicle.
It's a '57 Chevy. Mr Paris is an automobile aficionado.
This is his program.
What are we supposed to be doing?
I believe it's called... parking.
I almost forgot.
These are for you.
Thank you. You're... very thoughtful.
I downloaded a dancing subroutine into my program.
Would you like to try it?
Actually, I wouldn't mind just sitting here for a while.
You wouldn't?
Those moons and star formations are different from anything I've ever seen.
If you're interested, I could point out a few astronomical highlights.
You see that bluish planet?
That's Earth. It's where Starfleet Headquarters is located.
And over there, that's Cygnus.
That constellation is Hercules, named after a character in ancient Greek myth.
Hippocrates was also a Greek. He was the father of... Earth medicine.
And that cluster over there, that's called the Pleiades.
- Sorry I'm late. - That's all right. We don't need you.
Mr Grimes has taken your place at conn.
- But it's my shift. - Not today it isn't.
- Because I was ten minutes late? - That's right.
- Captain... - Don't look at me.
Commander Chakotay has complete discretion.
When should I report back for duty?
When you take your job seriously, we'll discuss it.
- Right now you're dismissed. - Get your hands off me!
- Mr Tuvok. - Yes, Captain.
Please escort Mr Paris to the brig.
Oh, boy. Am I glad to see you. I wasn't sure if you got my messages.
I got them all. You've been very helpful.
Do you know what they asked me to do?
You mean about the warp coils?
You could do it by forcing the magnetic constrictors out of alignment.
I don't mind feeding you information, but if you plan an attack...
I have no intention of raising my child on a Kazon ship.
I will take Voyager.
You can help me, or suffer with Janeway and the others.
Don't worry, Mike. Everything's been planned to the letter.
Here's how it's going to work.
We'll be waiting for you on a planet called Hemikek IV.
Doctor's personal log, stardate 49507.2.
The more time I spend with Danara, the more my programming adapts.
I will perfect my romantic skills once we've completed the synaptic transfer.
Set the delta-band frequency to seven terahertz.
Wait a minute. Did you administer the cervaline as I instructed?
- 500 milligrams every four hours. - I don't understand it.
- What's wrong? - Your brain is rejecting the graft.
We can't go through with the transfer.
I'm detecting elevated levels of nytoxinol.
Did you make an error? Administered nytoxinol instead?
No, I don't think so.
Here's the hypospray I used. Check for yourself.
You're correct. It's cervaline.
Has anyone else been in sickbay in the last 24 hours?
Crewman Foster came for analgesic and Wildman for her prenatal visit. Why?
If the nytoxinol was not administered by accident, someone is trying to kill her.
- Who would want to kill her? - Someone who hates Vidiians.
- I'm calling Lieutenant Tuvok. - Don't do that.
We have to find out who's obstructing your recovery.
I administered the nytoxinol.
- Didn't you know it would kill you? - Kill her.
- She is you. - Was me. I don't want to be her again!
What are you doing?
I have to reduce the rate of tissue rejection.
Kes, would you excuse us?
I won't go through with it.
If we don't get your neural patterns out, you'll be braindead. I can't let it happen.
I'd rather live two more days like this, than waste away a piece at a time.
It's my duty to keep you alive.
- I thought you were my friend. - I am your friend.
What kind of friend would ask me to go on living like this?
So that I can go back to a world where everyone I ever loved has died?
Where everyone I meet is going to die?
- You can help them. - I can't help them.
I can't cure them. All I can do is prolong their suffering.
Just like you want to do to me now.
Danara... I have no desire to see you suffer.
Do you know what it's like? Do you?
To be a child and your best friend doesn't want to come to your house.
You ask your mother why. "Why won't Mala come and play with me any more?"
She tells you, "It's because the other children are afraid of you."
Listen to me. Before I met you, I was just a disease.
But now everything's different.
When people look at me, they don't see a disease any more.
They see a woman. A woman you made.
A woman you love. A woman you're not afraid to touch.
Danara, I was never afraid to touch you.
Why? Because you're a doctor?
- Because I love you. - You say that now.
- But if I go through with the transfer... - If you go through with the transfer...
...I will be sick again. And ugly.
- You're not ugly. You're ill. - Please. Stop patronising me!
I know how people see me.
Do you think if you go back into your own body, I'll feel different about you?
Won't you?
Nothing could change the way I feel about you.
Not a few scars, some diseased skin, nothing.
You have given me the most extraordinary gift ever given.
You brought me to this ship where no one is sick and people are friendly.
You've made me healthy and beautiful.
I don't want to go back to the way things were.
You said before you knew me that you were just a disease.
Before you I was a projection of photons, held together by force fields.
A computerised physician doing a job, doing it exceptionally well,
but still it was just a profession, not a life.
But now you are here and I'm not just working any more.
I'm living, learning what it means to be with someone, to love someone.
I can't go back to the way things were either.
Danara, please. Don't die.
- I want us to be together. - So do I.
But if you put me back in that body, I'll have to go home... and help my people.
I know.
But we'd still have two weeks together before we reached your colony.
Danara, please, be with me for as long as you can.
Computer, play music program Doctor Alpha.