1
00:01:21,168 --> 00:01:23,170
MAN: Now remember, kids.

2
00:01:23,213 --> 00:01:25,128
It's not every couple
that's willing to adopt
three brothers and sisters.

3
00:01:25,172 --> 00:01:27,390
So I expect you to behave.

4
00:01:28,175 --> 00:01:30,045
Catch my drift?

5
00:02:15,047 --> 00:02:17,876
Brandon, Kyle, Molly,

6
00:02:17,920 --> 00:02:20,531
welcome to your new home.
Come on.

7
00:02:26,755 --> 00:02:28,322
[GASPS]

8
00:03:00,528 --> 00:03:02,356
MRS. NICELY: Molly,
this is your room.

9
00:03:02,399 --> 00:03:04,140
Go ahead, open the door.

10
00:03:15,238 --> 00:03:16,283
Wow!

11
00:03:22,376 --> 00:03:23,855
There's more, honey, come along.

12
00:03:37,216 --> 00:03:38,827
MOLLY: Oh, boy!

13
00:03:38,870 --> 00:03:40,045
[GASPS]

14
00:03:47,096 --> 00:03:49,011
[GASPS]

15
00:03:49,054 --> 00:03:50,708
Hi!

16
00:03:54,016 --> 00:03:55,235
[TRAIN HORN BLOWING]

17
00:04:10,032 --> 00:04:11,468
Children,

18
00:04:11,512 --> 00:04:14,297
we have only one rule
in our home.

19
00:04:15,255 --> 00:04:17,300
And that rule is...

20
00:04:17,344 --> 00:04:18,997
Keep out of this room.

21
00:04:19,041 --> 00:04:20,825
Do not open this door
no matter what.

22
00:04:20,869 --> 00:04:22,043
Do you all understand?

23
00:04:23,219 --> 00:04:24,438
That's fine.

24
00:04:24,481 --> 00:04:26,266
Now, go have fun.

25
00:04:26,309 --> 00:04:27,702
[MOLLY GIGGLES]

26
00:04:36,363 --> 00:04:38,582
[MOLLY LAUGHING]

27
00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:43,326
MOLLY: Thank you.

28
00:04:56,426 --> 00:04:58,036
What do you think's in there?

29
00:04:58,776 --> 00:05:00,038
Bodies,

30
00:05:00,082 --> 00:05:03,172
of the adopted children
that came before us.

31
00:05:03,215 --> 00:05:05,130
It's probably just their
office or something.

32
00:05:05,174 --> 00:05:06,175
Come on.

33
00:05:11,093 --> 00:05:12,312
KYLE: Molly?

34
00:05:12,355 --> 00:05:13,530
KYLE: Molly!

35
00:05:13,574 --> 00:05:15,402
What are you doing?
Get away from there.

36
00:05:18,927 --> 00:05:20,189
It's unlocked!

37
00:05:31,809 --> 00:05:34,595
You just couldn't
keep walking, could you?

38
00:05:34,638 --> 00:05:36,161
MR. NICELY: You had
to break the rule!

39
00:05:36,205 --> 00:05:38,207
You had to ruin a good thing.

40
00:05:38,250 --> 00:05:40,034
You just couldn't behave.

41
00:05:40,078 --> 00:05:42,167
It's all your fault.

42
00:05:42,211 --> 00:05:44,169
-MRS. NICELY: It's all
your fault.
-KYLE: It's all your fault.

43
00:05:44,213 --> 00:05:46,563
-MRS. NICELY: It's all
your fault.
-BRANDON: It's all your fault.

44
00:05:46,607 --> 00:05:48,522
ALL: It's all your fault.

45
00:05:48,565 --> 00:05:50,350
ALL: It's all your fault.

46
00:05:50,393 --> 00:05:52,743
It's all my fault.

47
00:05:52,787 --> 00:05:54,963
It's all my fault.

48
00:05:55,006 --> 00:05:56,747
It's all my fault.

49
00:05:56,791 --> 00:05:58,053
It's my fault.

50
00:05:58,096 --> 00:05:59,881
It's my fault.

51
00:05:59,924 --> 00:06:01,665
It's my fault.

52
00:06:01,709 --> 00:06:03,275
It's my fault.

53
00:06:03,841 --> 00:06:05,626
It's my fault.

54
00:06:05,669 --> 00:06:07,105
It's okay, Molly, wake up.

55
00:06:07,149 --> 00:06:08,368
You're having a nightmare.

56
00:06:10,457 --> 00:06:11,936
Come on, let's go.

57
00:06:11,980 --> 00:06:13,024
We're gonna miss breakfast.

58
00:06:35,046 --> 00:06:36,526
CLIFF: The important thing is, 
Mr. and Mrs. Lachman

59
00:06:36,570 --> 00:06:38,746
is that we at Mid-Valley know
that you would provide

60
00:06:38,789 --> 00:06:42,489
a loving and caring home
for any of our children.

61
00:06:42,532 --> 00:06:44,012
Well, thank you,

62
00:06:44,055 --> 00:06:46,406
but we would like a little more
time to discuss this.

63
00:06:46,449 --> 00:06:48,712
Oh sure, absolutely.
And listen, feel free to visit

64
00:06:48,756 --> 00:06:50,409
as many times
as you'd like, okay.

65
00:06:50,453 --> 00:06:53,108
I mean, this is not a decision
that should be rushed.

66
00:06:54,370 --> 00:06:55,457
Mr. Haber!

67
00:06:55,502 --> 00:06:56,720
Hey, Molly!

68
00:06:56,764 --> 00:06:58,766
You remember Mr.
and Mrs. Lachman, don't you?

69
00:06:58,808 --> 00:06:59,854
MR. LACHMAN: Hi, Molly

70
00:06:59,897 --> 00:07:01,159
It's nice
to see you again, Molly.

71
00:07:01,203 --> 00:07:03,727
Thank you, it's very nice
to see you again, too.

72
00:07:04,511 --> 00:07:06,208
Also.

73
00:07:06,251 --> 00:07:08,384
Mr. Haber,
Kyle found another frog!

74
00:07:08,428 --> 00:07:09,907
He's gonna operate.

75
00:07:09,951 --> 00:07:12,214
What? Well, where did he
get the knife?

76
00:07:12,257 --> 00:07:14,477
I left specific orders,
no knives.

77
00:07:16,174 --> 00:07:18,089
Um, you'll have
to excuse me, okay.

78
00:07:18,133 --> 00:07:19,221
Listen, feel free to call me

79
00:07:19,264 --> 00:07:20,527
if you have any questions
at all, okay.

80
00:07:20,570 --> 00:07:21,789
I'll be here
right through Thanksgiving.

81
00:07:22,354 --> 00:07:24,052
Kids. [LAUGHS]

82
00:07:24,095 --> 00:07:26,010
Uh, than you Mr. Haber, we will.

83
00:07:26,054 --> 00:07:27,185
CLIFF: Yeah.

84
00:07:30,841 --> 00:07:32,277
[FROG CROAKING]

85
00:07:32,321 --> 00:07:34,192
Mr. Brown, I'm confident

86
00:07:34,236 --> 00:07:35,933
that you can expect
a full recovery.

87
00:07:37,282 --> 00:07:38,327
Where is he?

88
00:07:38,370 --> 00:07:39,807
Right there.

89
00:07:39,850 --> 00:07:42,374
Kyle! Kyle! Kyle!

90
00:07:43,767 --> 00:07:44,986
Oh, my God!

91
00:07:45,029 --> 00:07:46,988
[STAMMERING] Give me the knife.

92
00:07:47,031 --> 00:07:48,337
It's not a knife,
it's a scalpel.

93
00:07:48,380 --> 00:07:50,295
It's not a scalpel,
it's a sharpened spoon.

94
00:07:50,339 --> 00:07:51,514
Now hand it over.

95
00:07:54,909 --> 00:07:55,909
Head's up!

96
00:08:03,439 --> 00:08:05,485
What are we going to do
with you three? Huh?

97
00:08:05,528 --> 00:08:08,009
I mean, how many times
do we have to have these talks?

98
00:08:08,052 --> 00:08:10,533
I mean, don't you want
to be adopted?

99
00:08:10,577 --> 00:08:12,100
Well then, why don't you behave
in a manner

100
00:08:12,143 --> 00:08:14,494
that prospective parents
will find appealing?

101
00:08:15,538 --> 00:08:17,061
Yes, Kyle.

102
00:08:17,105 --> 00:08:18,933
For Thanksgiving, can we have
the smooth cranberry sauce

103
00:08:18,976 --> 00:08:20,325
instead of the lumpy?

104
00:08:20,369 --> 00:08:22,371
Sometimes they leave the stems
in the lumpy kind.

105
00:08:22,414 --> 00:08:23,807
Those are grasshopper legs.

106
00:08:23,851 --> 00:08:25,983
They leave them in there
to preserve the freshness.

107
00:08:26,027 --> 00:08:28,420
That's just the kind of behavior
I'm talking about, Brandon.

108
00:08:29,900 --> 00:08:31,511
Listen, Kyle,

109
00:08:31,554 --> 00:08:33,861
when you perform surgery
on live animals,

110
00:08:33,904 --> 00:08:36,515
it kind of makes grownups feel
a little uneasy, okay?

111
00:08:38,039 --> 00:08:39,126
And Molly, when I'm...

112
00:08:58,581 --> 00:08:59,800
Where did you get this one?

113
00:08:59,843 --> 00:09:01,062
I found him by the dumpster.

114
00:09:01,105 --> 00:09:02,672
And he had no collar.

115
00:09:02,716 --> 00:09:05,066
She took it off, and she didn't
find him by the dumpster.

116
00:09:05,109 --> 00:09:07,242
She pulled him
out of a Mercedes.

117
00:09:07,285 --> 00:09:09,157
After she killed the driver.

118
00:09:09,200 --> 00:09:11,812
MOLLY: Did not, you liar!

119
00:09:11,855 --> 00:09:12,943
-Can I keep him?
-[PHONE RINGING]

120
00:09:16,512 --> 00:09:19,080
Oh, hang on, he just walked out
of his meeting.

121
00:09:19,123 --> 00:09:20,298
TRACY: David Miller.

122
00:09:20,342 --> 00:09:21,865
Oh, here. Listen,

123
00:09:21,909 --> 00:09:23,475
take the wards back to their
room and see if you can get

124
00:09:23,519 --> 00:09:24,999
Molly to give you
the dog collar, okay?

125
00:09:25,042 --> 00:09:26,566
-What dog?
-The dog.

126
00:09:26,609 --> 00:09:28,219
If you can get
the collar from her,

127
00:09:28,263 --> 00:09:29,525
call the owners of the dog up

128
00:09:29,569 --> 00:09:30,831
and tell them
where they can find their dog.

129
00:09:31,440 --> 00:09:32,659
David, hey pal,

130
00:09:32,702 --> 00:09:34,138
how are you doing?
How're they biting?

131
00:09:35,009 --> 00:09:36,271
Three footer?

132
00:09:36,314 --> 00:09:37,315
Yeah, any witnesses?

133
00:09:38,316 --> 00:09:39,796
What, are you kidding me?

134
00:09:39,840 --> 00:09:42,103
Thanksgiving in Florida,
that sounds wonderful.

135
00:09:43,713 --> 00:09:44,801
Oh, wait a minute. I can't.

136
00:09:44,845 --> 00:09:46,716
I got nobody here
to watch the kids.

137
00:09:46,760 --> 00:09:48,457
No, you know,
they've all gone out to visit

138
00:09:48,500 --> 00:09:50,372
cousins and sisters
and stuff. I'm stuck.

139
00:09:51,982 --> 00:09:53,027
My father?

140
00:09:54,071 --> 00:09:55,203
[FAKE LAUGH]

141
00:10:02,210 --> 00:10:03,951
MRS. OLSEN: It's a little
uncomfortable.

142
00:10:03,994 --> 00:10:06,867
HARRY: I couldn't agree
with you more, Mrs. Olsen.

143
00:10:06,910 --> 00:10:10,131
Although you would be surprised
to hear how many of my customers

144
00:10:10,174 --> 00:10:12,307
find that chair
a little uncomfortable.

145
00:10:13,700 --> 00:10:15,266
This one is good.

146
00:10:15,310 --> 00:10:18,661
That's the Weisman Padded 2000.
Well built, well balanced,

147
00:10:18,705 --> 00:10:20,532
hard cushion
to stimulate the buttocks.

148
00:10:20,576 --> 00:10:22,970
Personally, I will not sit
in anything else myself.

149
00:10:23,013 --> 00:10:25,625
It's a dollar twelve a day,
including tax.

150
00:10:25,668 --> 00:10:26,930
A dollar twelve?

151
00:10:26,974 --> 00:10:28,628
How do you make
any money at this?

152
00:10:28,671 --> 00:10:30,673
That's the beauty
of renting, Mrs. Olsen.

153
00:10:30,717 --> 00:10:34,459
You take this
6 dollar Clear-Thru XKI,

154
00:10:34,503 --> 00:10:36,548
I rent this
for twenty six cents a day.

155
00:10:36,592 --> 00:10:39,682
I rent each one of these
200 days out of the year.

156
00:10:39,726 --> 00:10:42,685
Now in terms of annual profit,
that's... plenty,

157
00:10:42,729 --> 00:10:43,860
I don't have to tell you.

158
00:10:43,904 --> 00:10:45,383
But the beauty of this is,

159
00:10:45,427 --> 00:10:46,689
you haven't bought something

160
00:10:46,733 --> 00:10:48,430
that you can't bring back
if you don't like it.

161
00:10:48,473 --> 00:10:50,780
200 times a year?

162
00:10:50,824 --> 00:10:53,000
Hand washed by my staff.

163
00:10:53,043 --> 00:10:54,654
Brought to your doorstep.

164
00:10:54,697 --> 00:10:57,395
Sterile as molten steel.

165
00:10:57,439 --> 00:11:00,485
Well, you've certainly given
the rental business

166
00:11:00,529 --> 00:11:02,618
a great deal of thought.

167
00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:05,273
I've devoted my life
to the subject.

168
00:11:05,316 --> 00:11:08,058
So you want me to take care
of your children's home

169
00:11:08,102 --> 00:11:09,581
for the next ten days.

170
00:11:09,625 --> 00:11:11,540
Now, is that what
you're asking?

171
00:11:11,583 --> 00:11:13,455
Oh, Dad, you'd be doing me
a great favor.

172
00:11:13,498 --> 00:11:14,978
-Hey, and listen...
-Yeah.

173
00:11:15,022 --> 00:11:17,198
You could bring Mr. Twixel
here because the kids love dogs.

174
00:11:17,241 --> 00:11:18,721
How long would you need me for?

175
00:11:18,765 --> 00:11:21,115
Ten days, Dad.
You just said it, ten.

176
00:11:21,158 --> 00:11:23,944
Actually, that'll take me
through, uh...

177
00:11:23,987 --> 00:11:26,207
And including
Thanksgiving Thursday.

178
00:11:26,250 --> 00:11:28,035
You remember Mrs. Pierce,
don't you?

179
00:11:28,078 --> 00:11:30,602
She makes a great spread for the
kids. I mean, lots of turkey.

180
00:11:30,646 --> 00:11:32,996
Yeah. Is that real turkey?
The full bird?

181
00:11:33,040 --> 00:11:36,043
-Of course, it's the full bird.
-[DOOR OPENS]

182
00:11:36,086 --> 00:11:38,175
We got any more
table lamps in blue?

183
00:11:38,219 --> 00:11:39,524
Nope, all gone.

184
00:11:39,568 --> 00:11:40,700
Hold on.

185
00:11:41,483 --> 00:11:42,484
Here.

186
00:11:44,399 --> 00:11:46,140
And don't forget
to charge for the bulb.

187
00:11:47,837 --> 00:11:49,056
[DOOR CLOSES]

188
00:11:56,890 --> 00:11:58,500
Are we gonna just sit here
in the dark, Dad?

189
00:11:59,675 --> 00:12:01,677
It's holiday time,
all my lamps are rented.

190
00:12:02,547 --> 00:12:03,984
[MUMBLING] Hold on.

191
00:12:07,770 --> 00:12:09,250
-There.
-[GROANS]

192
00:12:09,293 --> 00:12:13,384
Now... my duties as the
Substitute Assistant Director

193
00:12:13,428 --> 00:12:14,864
will entail what, exactly?

194
00:12:14,908 --> 00:12:16,170
Dad, virtually nothing,

195
00:12:16,213 --> 00:12:18,215
because Thanksgiving
is always a dead week.

196
00:12:18,259 --> 00:12:19,826
Dad, you just take
a few messages.

197
00:12:19,869 --> 00:12:22,263
You'll watch the football game.
I mean, it'll be a breeze.

198
00:12:22,306 --> 00:12:24,918
I'm telling you Dad, I could
really, really use the break.

199
00:12:26,049 --> 00:12:27,311
Well, why not.

200
00:12:27,355 --> 00:12:29,052
If a father
can't help out a son,

201
00:12:29,096 --> 00:12:30,924
then I say to everlasting hell

202
00:12:30,967 --> 00:12:33,317
with both
of them, right? [LAUGHS]

203
00:12:33,361 --> 00:12:35,972
Right. [LAUGHS]

204
00:12:43,850 --> 00:12:45,852
[LAUGHS] That looks great.

205
00:12:45,895 --> 00:12:47,201
-Son...
-Yeah.

206
00:12:47,244 --> 00:12:48,942
I've been going
over your files here.

207
00:12:48,985 --> 00:12:52,423
I've been studying the entire
orphanage operation

208
00:12:52,467 --> 00:12:56,036
and I think I have
solved your problem.

209
00:12:56,079 --> 00:12:57,907
Problem? What problem?
I don't have a problem.

210
00:12:57,951 --> 00:12:59,430
Nobody said you did.

211
00:12:59,474 --> 00:13:01,650
But it must be clear to you
merchandise is not moving

212
00:13:01,693 --> 00:13:02,956
and you're way overstocked.

213
00:13:02,999 --> 00:13:05,132
Now, with the Ward family
for example, uh,

214
00:13:05,175 --> 00:13:07,830
Molly, Kyle and Brandon,
they have been

215
00:13:07,874 --> 00:13:09,353
sort of on the shelf
for quite some time now.

216
00:13:09,397 --> 00:13:11,181
Wait, wait, wait. Dad, Dad,
these are children, okay?

217
00:13:11,225 --> 00:13:12,792
This is their home,
not their shelf.

218
00:13:12,835 --> 00:13:14,706
Work with me, son.

219
00:13:14,750 --> 00:13:16,230
Now you're in the business
of getting these children
adopted, right?

220
00:13:16,273 --> 00:13:17,405
Business is slow. Why?

221
00:13:17,448 --> 00:13:20,103
Because you have
no viable marketing plan.

222
00:13:20,147 --> 00:13:21,670
No, no, no...

223
00:13:21,713 --> 00:13:23,628
It's because adopting is a very
delicate process, okay.

224
00:13:23,672 --> 00:13:25,848
A lot of time and effort goes
into making sure that the match

225
00:13:25,892 --> 00:13:28,329
between child and prospective
parents is a good one.

226
00:13:28,372 --> 00:13:29,896
Yes!

227
00:13:29,939 --> 00:13:33,421
And this is where the genius
of my plan comes in full circle.

228
00:13:34,117 --> 00:13:35,118
Now, are you ready?

229
00:13:36,076 --> 00:13:37,642
Rent-A-Kid.

230
00:13:40,080 --> 00:13:41,908
Okay, I'm cancelling my trip.

231
00:13:41,951 --> 00:13:44,649
No, no, no. Why adopt a child
you may not like

232
00:13:44,693 --> 00:13:46,173
and you cannot return?

233
00:13:46,216 --> 00:13:48,392
I mean people have trouble
committing to car payments,

234
00:13:48,436 --> 00:13:49,524
much less parenthood.

235
00:13:49,567 --> 00:13:51,221
I'm cancelling my trip

236
00:13:51,265 --> 00:13:52,266
and then I'm calling
Doctor Eilenberg,
okay. Now, this is--

237
00:13:52,309 --> 00:13:53,658
No, now just a second.

238
00:13:53,702 --> 00:13:56,748
For a small,
non-refundable deposit fee,

239
00:13:56,792 --> 00:13:57,880
nobody gets locked in

240
00:13:57,924 --> 00:13:59,360
and we can move
the kids around

241
00:13:59,403 --> 00:14:01,275
until we find the perfect match.

242
00:14:01,318 --> 00:14:04,104
Dad, we are talking about
flesh and blood kids here!

243
00:14:04,147 --> 00:14:05,670
And I'm talking about
a home for those kids.

244
00:14:07,977 --> 00:14:09,892
Okay, look Dad,

245
00:14:09,936 --> 00:14:12,242
I know your heart's
in the right place, okay.

246
00:14:12,286 --> 00:14:13,940
But, please,
just do me a favor,

247
00:14:13,983 --> 00:14:16,029
when I'm gone
just take some messages,

248
00:14:16,072 --> 00:14:17,465
watch some football

249
00:14:17,508 --> 00:14:18,988
and don't
get yourself arrested.

250
00:14:22,513 --> 00:14:24,385
[SOFT MUSIC PLAYING ON STEREO]

251
00:14:24,428 --> 00:14:25,865
[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]

252
00:14:27,954 --> 00:14:29,520
Thank you.

253
00:14:34,961 --> 00:14:36,136
Buenos dias, senor.

254
00:14:36,179 --> 00:14:37,528
Can I start you off
with a margarita.

255
00:14:37,572 --> 00:14:40,140
Actually, I'll just have
a drink. An iced tea.

256
00:14:40,183 --> 00:14:42,577
Would you happen to know
the wholesale price of this?

257
00:14:43,404 --> 00:14:44,405
I really wouldn't

258
00:14:51,499 --> 00:14:53,501
[GLASS CLINKING]

259
00:14:55,111 --> 00:14:58,985
So this guy calls me,
nine o' clock on the button.

260
00:14:59,028 --> 00:15:02,162
Says that he has
an Abraham Lincoln letter.

261
00:15:02,205 --> 00:15:04,338
He says, maybe he should
fax over a copy.

262
00:15:04,381 --> 00:15:05,992
It's a very special piece.

263
00:15:07,428 --> 00:15:08,429
You ready?

264
00:15:12,215 --> 00:15:13,216
Take a look.

265
00:15:16,524 --> 00:15:19,266
-Woah.
-May 8th, 1863.

266
00:15:19,309 --> 00:15:20,789
That is just a couple of days

267
00:15:20,832 --> 00:15:23,531
after the South defeated
the North at Chancellorsville.

268
00:15:23,574 --> 00:15:26,186
An outline of possible
surrender terms

269
00:15:26,229 --> 00:15:28,579
if the North
loses any more ground?

270
00:15:28,623 --> 00:15:31,452
Sounds like old Abe
was a little nervous there, huh?

271
00:15:31,495 --> 00:15:33,367
This is a significant
historical document.

272
00:15:33,410 --> 00:15:34,629
I know! I know!

273
00:15:34,672 --> 00:15:35,978
[BOTH CHUCKLE IN EXCITEMENT]

274
00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:42,202
But it's not a baby, Russ.

275
00:15:43,594 --> 00:15:45,074
No, it's not a baby, Val.

276
00:15:46,336 --> 00:15:48,686
Honey, we've been
over this baby thing

277
00:15:48,730 --> 00:15:49,992
hundreds of times.

278
00:15:50,036 --> 00:15:53,387
I mean,
before we have a family,

279
00:15:53,430 --> 00:15:55,302
we have to look
at the pros and the cons.

280
00:15:55,345 --> 00:15:57,782
We're never going to know
until we try.

281
00:15:57,826 --> 00:16:00,002
Do you know how much
these kids cost?

282
00:16:00,046 --> 00:16:01,961
I mean, you start talking
about diapers

283
00:16:02,004 --> 00:16:03,745
and pacifiers and clothes.

284
00:16:03,788 --> 00:16:05,660
Val, clothes, clothes,

285
00:16:05,703 --> 00:16:07,444
I mean, kids,
they wear tons of clothes.

286
00:16:07,488 --> 00:16:10,230
Kids go through a couple of
hundred pounds of clothes a day.

287
00:16:10,273 --> 00:16:12,014
RUSS: I mean, they're born
and they just start growing.

288
00:16:13,059 --> 00:16:14,974
Can I be honest?

289
00:16:15,017 --> 00:16:17,889
I don't know that we're
cut out to be parents.

290
00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:20,588
Yeah, I mean it.

291
00:16:20,631 --> 00:16:23,808
I mean Val, we like cars
and laser discs

292
00:16:23,852 --> 00:16:25,506
and those front row seats.

293
00:16:25,549 --> 00:16:28,248
We're "things" people,
we're not "kids" people.

294
00:16:28,944 --> 00:16:31,033
Russ, I am tired

295
00:16:31,077 --> 00:16:33,862
of begging strange children
to let me hold them.

296
00:16:33,905 --> 00:16:36,082
I'm tired of congratulating
pregnant people

297
00:16:36,125 --> 00:16:38,823
who I secretly despise.

298
00:16:38,867 --> 00:16:40,216
[SHOUTING] I want to go
to Baby Gap

299
00:16:40,260 --> 00:16:41,870
and buy little overalls.

300
00:16:43,872 --> 00:16:45,004
Hi.

301
00:16:45,613 --> 00:16:47,180
I'm Harry Haber.

302
00:16:47,223 --> 00:16:49,008
Pardon me for intruding,

303
00:16:49,051 --> 00:16:51,097
but at my table
I could only hear

304
00:16:51,140 --> 00:16:52,750
bits and pieces
of your conversation.

305
00:16:52,794 --> 00:16:55,665
Excuse me, but it was
a private conversation.

306
00:16:55,710 --> 00:16:57,059
Absolutely.

307
00:16:57,103 --> 00:16:59,192
And private it shall remain.

308
00:16:59,235 --> 00:17:00,671
Now, how can I help?

309
00:17:00,715 --> 00:17:04,414
Well, as it happens,
I'm in the Rent-A-Kid business.

310
00:17:04,458 --> 00:17:06,068
Rent a what did he say?

311
00:17:06,112 --> 00:17:08,069
Kids. He says he rents kids.

312
00:17:08,114 --> 00:17:09,723
It's a whole new open market.

313
00:17:09,767 --> 00:17:13,031
I believe it's gonna shoot
to the top like molten steel.

314
00:17:13,075 --> 00:17:15,077
Busy people like yourselves,

315
00:17:15,121 --> 00:17:17,819
asking yourself,
do we have kids? Do we not?

316
00:17:17,862 --> 00:17:19,125
What are the pros?
What are the cons?

317
00:17:19,167 --> 00:17:20,300
The ups, the downs.

318
00:17:20,343 --> 00:17:22,519
You know, have we made
a wrong choice?

319
00:17:22,563 --> 00:17:23,954
I mean, you can't
take it back, you know.

320
00:17:23,999 --> 00:17:25,087
You can't return them.

321
00:17:25,131 --> 00:17:27,523
There's no exchange,
you know. Right?

322
00:17:28,960 --> 00:17:31,615
Wrong. Because, why?

323
00:17:31,659 --> 00:17:33,487
Harry Haber is here.

324
00:17:33,530 --> 00:17:35,315
You rent live children?

325
00:17:35,358 --> 00:17:38,448
Yeah. Now, I'll tell you
what I'm willing to do

326
00:17:38,492 --> 00:17:39,928
as a special
introductory offer.

327
00:17:39,971 --> 00:17:41,538
I have a family of three.

328
00:17:41,582 --> 00:17:42,844
Two boys, one girl.

329
00:17:42,887 --> 00:17:44,324
Ages five, ten and thirteen.

330
00:17:44,367 --> 00:17:46,108
All in mint condition.

331
00:17:46,152 --> 00:17:49,329
Now, I'm willing to let you
have all three

332
00:17:49,372 --> 00:17:51,548
at the usual
single weekly rate.

333
00:17:53,811 --> 00:17:56,205
No. I don't think so.

334
00:17:56,249 --> 00:17:58,033
Why not?
Why not give it a try?

335
00:17:58,773 --> 00:18:01,036
Get a feel for each age.

336
00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:02,516
At the end of the week,

337
00:18:02,559 --> 00:18:04,779
then you can bring them back.
No harm. No foul.

338
00:18:08,391 --> 00:18:10,524
Well, I'll tell you what.
You think about it.

339
00:18:10,567 --> 00:18:13,135
If you change your mind,
give me a call.

340
00:18:13,179 --> 00:18:15,833
I also rent popcorn machines
and weed whackers.

341
00:18:22,449 --> 00:18:24,103
That was pretty wild tonight,
huh, Val?

342
00:18:25,060 --> 00:18:27,671
That, uh, Rent-A-Kid guy.

343
00:18:28,977 --> 00:18:31,153
Yup. We'll see.

344
00:18:31,197 --> 00:18:33,199
We'll read he was
an escaped prisoner.

345
00:18:33,242 --> 00:18:34,243
Yeah.

346
00:18:35,375 --> 00:18:36,463
You know, in some ways though,

347
00:18:36,506 --> 00:18:37,594
and I mean very few,

348
00:18:38,682 --> 00:18:40,554
the idea of actually
renting kids...

349
00:18:42,512 --> 00:18:43,644
It would sort of,
let you kind of,

350
00:18:43,687 --> 00:18:44,819
test it out
a little bit though,

351
00:18:44,862 --> 00:18:47,126
without actually
committing to it forever.

352
00:18:47,691 --> 00:18:50,172
[BOTH CHUCKLE]

353
00:18:50,216 --> 00:18:53,132
Well, I guess you can
find something good

354
00:18:53,175 --> 00:18:54,698
in any idea
if you look hard enough.

355
00:18:54,742 --> 00:18:56,135
Right, right.

356
00:18:56,178 --> 00:18:58,398
But this particular idea,

357
00:18:58,441 --> 00:19:00,704
you know, with us kind of
on the fence about it
a little bit.

358
00:19:02,445 --> 00:19:04,360
You know,
to actually experience

359
00:19:04,404 --> 00:19:06,449
having a few kids around

360
00:19:06,493 --> 00:19:08,625
for a limited amount of time.

361
00:19:08,669 --> 00:19:09,844
VALERIE: Yeah.

362
00:19:17,243 --> 00:19:18,244
Russ...

363
00:19:20,289 --> 00:19:23,031
Are you telling me
you want to rent-a-kid?

364
00:19:23,074 --> 00:19:24,511
No...

365
00:19:24,554 --> 00:19:26,339
[SCOFFS] Of course not.

366
00:19:30,995 --> 00:19:32,562
Yeah.

367
00:19:32,606 --> 00:19:35,174
You think we can just
rent some kids

368
00:19:35,217 --> 00:19:36,566
and return them
when we're through?

369
00:19:36,610 --> 00:19:38,916
Well, I just think that
it might help us decide

370
00:19:38,960 --> 00:19:41,571
if having a family is something
we really want to do.

371
00:19:41,615 --> 00:19:44,748
But, they wouldn't be our kids.

372
00:19:44,792 --> 00:19:46,272
Exactly.

373
00:19:46,315 --> 00:19:49,188
But, after a week,
if we still want a family,

374
00:19:49,231 --> 00:19:51,451
then we must really
want a family.

375
00:19:51,494 --> 00:19:53,148
Well, what if we got
a bunch of kids we hated?

376
00:19:53,192 --> 00:19:54,584
Kids that would never
be like ours

377
00:19:54,628 --> 00:19:56,064
if we raised them on our own.

378
00:19:56,107 --> 00:19:58,240
Well, I guess we'd mix that
into the equation

379
00:19:58,284 --> 00:20:00,155
and we'd try again.

380
00:20:00,199 --> 00:20:02,766
But if we keep renting
and we keep having problems,

381
00:20:04,290 --> 00:20:06,074
well, I think we've learned
a valuable lesson.

382
00:20:08,076 --> 00:20:09,338
Val...

383
00:20:10,992 --> 00:20:12,036
Look,

384
00:20:13,212 --> 00:20:14,648
I like my life right now.

385
00:20:15,910 --> 00:20:17,216
I love it.

386
00:20:17,259 --> 00:20:18,565
I love everything about it.

387
00:20:20,349 --> 00:20:22,221
But, I also love you, very much.

388
00:20:23,526 --> 00:20:25,441
Now, I know how important
this is to you.

389
00:20:26,616 --> 00:20:28,139
So I'm willing
to give it a shot.

390
00:20:29,663 --> 00:20:30,751
Then we'll see.

391
00:20:33,928 --> 00:20:36,278
Excellent profile.
No police record.

392
00:20:37,018 --> 00:20:38,367
And the credit's fine.

393
00:20:38,411 --> 00:20:40,761
Except for this one
late payment on lingerie.

394
00:20:40,804 --> 00:20:42,545
I assume that purchase
was for your wife.

395
00:20:42,589 --> 00:20:44,155
Of course it was for my wife.

396
00:20:44,199 --> 00:20:46,810
Of course. Alright then,
now when would you

397
00:20:46,854 --> 00:20:48,464
like to take delivery
of the children?

398
00:20:49,683 --> 00:20:51,902
Could you not...
put it that way?

399
00:20:51,946 --> 00:20:53,426
Wouldn't think of it.

400
00:20:53,469 --> 00:20:56,516
What would be a good time
for your rental period to begin?

401
00:20:56,559 --> 00:20:57,647
Let me see now.

402
00:20:57,691 --> 00:21:00,520
I have the next
ten days available.

403
00:21:00,563 --> 00:21:02,739
Oh, no. I'm sorry.
That won't work for us at all.

404
00:21:02,783 --> 00:21:04,828
We have a big auction
the day before Thanksgiving.

405
00:21:05,960 --> 00:21:07,266
So, we can start
sometime after that.

406
00:21:07,309 --> 00:21:09,006
Oh, well.
No, that won't work for me.

407
00:21:09,050 --> 00:21:10,269
Let's see.

408
00:21:10,312 --> 00:21:12,445
I have the next
ten days available.

409
00:21:13,663 --> 00:21:15,274
Yes, you said that.

410
00:21:15,317 --> 00:21:16,492
[WHISPERING] He just said that.

411
00:21:16,536 --> 00:21:19,974
Excuse me, but why
are the next ten days

412
00:21:20,017 --> 00:21:21,454
the only time
we can make this happen?

413
00:21:21,497 --> 00:21:24,935
Uh, well, it's simply that, um,

414
00:21:24,979 --> 00:21:28,722
this is a trial experiment.

415
00:21:28,765 --> 00:21:32,465
And the experiment ends
ten days from today.

416
00:21:32,508 --> 00:21:34,031
[CHILDREN CHATTERING]

417
00:21:35,511 --> 00:21:37,383
Maybe we can do it.

418
00:21:37,426 --> 00:21:39,123
No, honey.
We have a lot of work to do.

419
00:21:39,167 --> 00:21:41,038
Well, it'll be like real life.

420
00:21:41,082 --> 00:21:42,910
We've got to make time
for our kids, right?

421
00:21:42,953 --> 00:21:45,782
Excellent parental thinking,
Mrs. Syracuse.

422
00:21:46,609 --> 00:21:47,784
No one leaves this world

423
00:21:47,828 --> 00:21:49,351
wishing they'd spent
more time at the office,

424
00:21:50,134 --> 00:21:51,875
my own pop aside.

425
00:21:52,485 --> 00:21:53,747
[CHUCKLES]

426
00:21:58,055 --> 00:21:59,318
I think we should try it.

427
00:22:00,493 --> 00:22:01,972
-You do?
-Yeah, I really do.

428
00:22:04,192 --> 00:22:07,195
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
Okay, we'll try it.

429
00:22:07,238 --> 00:22:09,023
Just initial the box down there,

430
00:22:09,066 --> 00:22:12,069
merchandise accepted
and I'll walk it on through.

431
00:22:18,032 --> 00:22:19,773
Very good. Thank you.

432
00:22:22,166 --> 00:22:23,516
[SIGHS] Well...

433
00:22:25,082 --> 00:22:27,476
The worst that can happen
is what?

434
00:22:27,520 --> 00:22:29,435
I mean, we have
a rough ten days, huh?

435
00:22:29,478 --> 00:22:31,088
-[LAUGHS]
-Right?

436
00:22:31,132 --> 00:22:32,742
-[LAUGHING] Right.
-[LAUGHING]

437
00:22:32,786 --> 00:22:34,309
We learn a few lessons.

438
00:22:42,709 --> 00:22:44,319
I wonder which ones are ours?

439
00:22:44,363 --> 00:22:46,974
[CHILDREN GIGGLING]

440
00:22:47,017 --> 00:22:50,281
I hope it's not that kid
operating on the stuffed animal.

441
00:22:50,325 --> 00:22:51,587
KYLE: We're gonna be adopted?

442
00:22:51,631 --> 00:22:53,284
HARRY: Well, not in
the traditional sense.

443
00:22:53,328 --> 00:22:54,677
It's more like a lease option.

444
00:22:54,721 --> 00:22:56,897
You see, I've met
this wonderful, young couple

445
00:22:56,940 --> 00:22:58,986
who wants to experience
the joys of family living,

446
00:22:59,029 --> 00:23:01,684
and I thought you swell kids
would be perfect

447
00:23:01,728 --> 00:23:03,730
to provide the right atmosphere.

448
00:23:03,773 --> 00:23:05,166
So we're gonna be "atmosphere"?

449
00:23:05,209 --> 00:23:07,647
Brandon, don't put
words in my mouth now.

450
00:23:07,690 --> 00:23:08,822
I want you kids to look at this

451
00:23:08,865 --> 00:23:11,477
as a step
in the right direction.

452
00:23:11,520 --> 00:23:13,609
We can stay together?

453
00:23:13,653 --> 00:23:16,395
More importantly,
you get to stay together.

454
00:23:16,438 --> 00:23:19,659
The Syracuses have a big home
and lots of room.

455
00:23:19,702 --> 00:23:21,791
Did Mr. Cliff Haber
sign off on this?

456
00:23:21,835 --> 00:23:23,837
Now son, don't worry about

457
00:23:23,880 --> 00:23:26,056
who signs off
and who signs on this.

458
00:23:26,100 --> 00:23:28,972
Just think about the great time
you're going to have.

459
00:23:29,016 --> 00:23:30,234
What's so great about it?

460
00:23:31,584 --> 00:23:33,455
What's in it for us?

461
00:23:33,499 --> 00:23:36,458
Well, for starters,
they've got a dog.

462
00:23:36,502 --> 00:23:38,242
-They've got a dog.
-Yes!

463
00:23:38,286 --> 00:23:40,506
They've got a dog.
They've got a dog.

464
00:23:51,778 --> 00:23:53,649
MOLLY: I thought we were
going to live in a house,

465
00:23:53,693 --> 00:23:55,521
not a building.

466
00:23:55,564 --> 00:23:57,784
This is it?
There's not even a yard?

467
00:23:58,654 --> 00:24:00,526
Uh, alright kids,

468
00:24:00,569 --> 00:24:02,310
now you're going to have to make
some adjustments here.

469
00:24:02,353 --> 00:24:04,268
As you may have noticed,
there is no backyard.

470
00:24:04,312 --> 00:24:05,574
Let's get moving.

471
00:24:05,618 --> 00:24:06,967
Don't want to miss
our delivery time.

472
00:24:12,581 --> 00:24:13,582
[DOOR OPENS]

473
00:24:21,895 --> 00:24:23,070
[DOORBELL RINGS]

474
00:24:25,551 --> 00:24:26,900
We don't have to answer.

475
00:24:26,943 --> 00:24:29,816
[SIGHS] Last moment together
as single people.

476
00:24:29,859 --> 00:24:30,904
[BOTH CHUCKLE NERVOUSLY]

477
00:24:30,947 --> 00:24:31,948
For ten days at least.

478
00:24:35,778 --> 00:24:36,779
[SIGHS]

479
00:24:40,870 --> 00:24:44,265
HARRY: Hi folks. Molly, Kyle,
Brandon Ward.

480
00:24:44,308 --> 00:24:47,529
I present to you Mr. and Mrs.
Russ and Val Syracuse.

481
00:24:47,573 --> 00:24:49,400
Hi, I'm Valerie.

482
00:24:50,967 --> 00:24:52,099
I'm Russ. [CHUCKLES]

483
00:24:52,142 --> 00:24:54,449
It's nice to meet you.
Come on in.

484
00:24:55,363 --> 00:24:56,669
Here we go.

485
00:25:09,464 --> 00:25:10,770
[GUN FIRING]

486
00:25:20,214 --> 00:25:21,694
Uh, kids!

487
00:25:21,737 --> 00:25:24,348
There's a lot of things that you
see here in the apartment,

488
00:25:24,392 --> 00:25:27,569
the TV, the stereo,
things on the walls,

489
00:25:28,396 --> 00:25:29,789
the walls themselves.

490
00:25:29,832 --> 00:25:32,008
These are grown up things.

491
00:25:32,052 --> 00:25:34,576
They're not for touching, okay?

492
00:25:34,620 --> 00:25:36,709
[LAUGHS NERVOUSLY]
That's very welcoming.

493
00:25:36,752 --> 00:25:38,711
Um, come on,

494
00:25:38,754 --> 00:25:41,017
put your stuff down
and make yourselves at home.

495
00:25:44,455 --> 00:25:46,109
Ah, Molly?

496
00:25:46,806 --> 00:25:48,503
Is something wrong?

497
00:25:48,547 --> 00:25:50,418
She's trying not to sneeze.

498
00:25:50,461 --> 00:25:52,028
Why is she trying not to sneeze?

499
00:25:52,072 --> 00:25:54,640
Brandon told her people
can only sneeze so many times

500
00:25:54,683 --> 00:25:56,032
before their heads explode.

501
00:25:56,076 --> 00:25:57,425
I'm at my limit.

502
00:25:59,253 --> 00:26:01,124
-She is.
-[VALERIE CHUCKLES]

503
00:26:01,168 --> 00:26:03,866
Molly, Brandon,
I think is just teasing,

504
00:26:03,910 --> 00:26:05,781
you can sneeze
as much as you want.

505
00:26:05,825 --> 00:26:07,522
Nothing bad's gonna happen.

506
00:26:07,566 --> 00:26:10,743
[SNEEZES] That was close.

507
00:26:10,786 --> 00:26:12,222
[LAUGHS]

508
00:26:16,662 --> 00:26:18,577
I don't see a dog.

509
00:26:18,620 --> 00:26:20,448
-That's because we don't own...
-I took the liberty

510
00:26:20,491 --> 00:26:22,668
of telling little Molly
that you owned a dog.

511
00:26:24,147 --> 00:26:26,106
[CHUCKLES] But we
don't own a dog.

512
00:26:26,149 --> 00:26:28,412
Well, now to be honest
with you Mr. and Mrs. Syracuse,

513
00:26:28,456 --> 00:26:30,284
uh, a little give and take
was necessary

514
00:26:30,327 --> 00:26:32,286
to ensure
the children's compliance.

515
00:26:32,329 --> 00:26:33,679
They didn't wanna come?

516
00:26:33,722 --> 00:26:35,463
Oh, yes. They wanted to come.

517
00:26:35,506 --> 00:26:36,812
But to be honest with you,

518
00:26:36,856 --> 00:26:38,379
a little give and take
was necessary

519
00:26:38,422 --> 00:26:40,207
to ensure
the children's compliance.

520
00:26:41,948 --> 00:26:43,906
He's repeating himself again.

521
00:26:43,950 --> 00:26:46,561
She came here expecting a dog.

522
00:26:46,605 --> 00:26:48,737
How could you
lie to her like that?

523
00:26:48,781 --> 00:26:50,826
If you like,
I could rent you a dog.

524
00:26:50,870 --> 00:26:52,523
-You rent dogs?
-Oh, yeah.

525
00:26:55,788 --> 00:26:59,313
Uh, Molly.
The dog is at the vet.

526
00:26:59,356 --> 00:27:00,836
-We'll pick her up...
-Him.

527
00:27:00,880 --> 00:27:03,099
We'll pick him up later.

528
00:27:03,752 --> 00:27:05,232
Okay?

529
00:27:05,275 --> 00:27:08,801
Oh, this is
a brief list of things

530
00:27:08,844 --> 00:27:10,019
that could help the children

531
00:27:10,063 --> 00:27:12,369
through difficult
transition periods.

532
00:27:12,413 --> 00:27:15,851
Uh, well,
what a fine looking family.

533
00:27:15,895 --> 00:27:18,419
I'll see you kids
all in about ten days.

534
00:27:18,462 --> 00:27:19,463
[PAGER BEEPING]

535
00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:23,554
VALERIE: Do you need the phone?

536
00:27:23,598 --> 00:27:25,034
Could I borrow your phone?

537
00:27:25,078 --> 00:27:26,514
In the kitchen.

538
00:27:27,210 --> 00:27:28,342
Oh.

539
00:27:31,954 --> 00:27:35,566
RUSS: Kids, do you have
any questions?

540
00:27:35,610 --> 00:27:37,568
Anything at all
you'd like to know?

541
00:27:37,612 --> 00:27:39,745
Where do you keep
the sharp knives?

542
00:27:43,574 --> 00:27:46,490
Hey, Dad! Listen, terrific news.

543
00:27:46,534 --> 00:27:48,710
Yeah, listen, I just hung up
the phone with the Lachmans

544
00:27:48,754 --> 00:27:50,320
and they wanna adopt Molly Ward.

545
00:27:50,364 --> 00:27:52,409
Well, that is good news.

546
00:27:52,453 --> 00:27:53,584
[OVER PHONE] They're going 
to sign the papers

547
00:27:53,628 --> 00:27:55,717
after the holidays
but tell Molly now.

548
00:27:55,761 --> 00:27:57,850
And wish her
a Happy Thanksgiving for me.

549
00:27:57,893 --> 00:27:59,416
Will do, son.

550
00:27:59,460 --> 00:28:02,593
Can I give her any idea
when the papers will be signed?

551
00:28:02,637 --> 00:28:04,291
-[LINE DISCONNECTS]
-Hello?

552
00:28:05,771 --> 00:28:07,729
Ah.

553
00:28:07,773 --> 00:28:11,211
Well, I guess I just have
about the best news

554
00:28:11,254 --> 00:28:13,474
that anybody would want to hear.

555
00:28:13,517 --> 00:28:15,606
Turns out that our
little Molly's gonna be adopted.

556
00:28:16,651 --> 00:28:18,609
[CHUCKLES] That's wonderful!

557
00:28:18,653 --> 00:28:20,699
Well, congratulations, Molly.

558
00:28:20,742 --> 00:28:22,526
HARRY: Yes, Sir!

559
00:28:22,570 --> 00:28:24,441
It looks like after
this rental termination,

560
00:28:24,485 --> 00:28:26,835
you're going to be known
as Molly Lachman.

561
00:28:27,706 --> 00:28:29,751
What about my brothers?

562
00:28:29,795 --> 00:28:32,449
Well, I guess, they'll continue
to be known as Brandon and Kyle.

563
00:28:39,456 --> 00:28:41,241
Ah, we'll take care of it.

564
00:28:45,941 --> 00:28:47,029
The sibling bond.

565
00:28:48,161 --> 00:28:50,380
Is there anything mightier?

566
00:28:53,296 --> 00:28:56,125
I don't want to be
adopted alone.

567
00:28:56,169 --> 00:28:58,214
It'll be okay, Molly.

568
00:28:58,258 --> 00:28:59,650
It'll even be great.

569
00:28:59,694 --> 00:29:01,130
I bet you'll live
in a real house,

570
00:29:01,174 --> 00:29:02,566
with a real backyard.

571
00:29:02,610 --> 00:29:04,786
And plus, we'll probably
see you all the time.

572
00:29:04,830 --> 00:29:07,223
I don't care.
I don't wanna go.

573
00:29:12,838 --> 00:29:14,056
What the heck is this?

574
00:29:15,971 --> 00:29:17,407
What does it look like, stupid?

575
00:29:17,451 --> 00:29:18,495
It's a drinking fountain.

576
00:29:19,540 --> 00:29:21,977
You know, I was thinking.

577
00:29:22,021 --> 00:29:23,718
If we got these people
to like us,

578
00:29:23,762 --> 00:29:25,198
I mean really like us,

579
00:29:25,241 --> 00:29:27,200
maybe they'd keep us.

580
00:29:27,243 --> 00:29:28,723
All of us?

581
00:29:28,767 --> 00:29:30,856
That means we could
stay together?

582
00:29:30,899 --> 00:29:34,250
Guys, let's behave.

583
00:29:36,644 --> 00:29:37,776
ALL: Yes!

584
00:29:40,387 --> 00:29:42,911
RUSS: Whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa! Easy there, Kyle.

585
00:29:42,955 --> 00:29:44,608
It's a first year issue G.I. Joe

586
00:29:44,652 --> 00:29:46,610
that's worth about $4,000.

587
00:29:47,611 --> 00:29:48,656
Hi.

588
00:29:48,699 --> 00:29:51,006
No, no, Kyle's ten.

589
00:29:51,050 --> 00:29:52,747
He's a real big doctor fan.

590
00:29:52,791 --> 00:29:54,270
He wants to be 
a brain surgeon, in fact.

591
00:29:54,314 --> 00:29:56,403
Really? That's funny
because that's how old I was

592
00:29:56,446 --> 00:29:57,839
when I decided
to become a surgeon.

593
00:29:57,883 --> 00:29:59,972
RUSS: Well, anyway, 
the little guy's made...

594
00:30:00,015 --> 00:30:01,060
Quite a name for himself.

595
00:30:01,103 --> 00:30:02,409
He practices brain surgery

596
00:30:02,452 --> 00:30:04,280
on just about anything
he can find.

597
00:30:04,324 --> 00:30:05,325
[TOY CLATTERS]

598
00:30:06,239 --> 00:30:08,023
Kyle, you ripped Joe's head off.

599
00:30:08,067 --> 00:30:09,808
Pick it up! Pick his head up.

600
00:30:10,591 --> 00:30:11,853
Bring it here.

601
00:30:11,897 --> 00:30:13,855
Bring it here. Maybe we can
jam it back on.

602
00:30:14,638 --> 00:30:16,510
Russ, you need a doctor?

603
00:30:16,553 --> 00:30:19,165
Oh, no. Listen, Craig.

604
00:30:19,208 --> 00:30:20,383
Is there any chance
we can come by?

605
00:30:20,427 --> 00:30:21,515
Just for a couple of minutes?

606
00:30:24,170 --> 00:30:25,258
Please?

607
00:30:26,389 --> 00:30:27,390
[CHUCKLES]

608
00:30:36,922 --> 00:30:38,358
I can play with it?

609
00:30:38,880 --> 00:30:40,012
Sure, you can.

610
00:30:40,055 --> 00:30:41,404
It's yours.

611
00:30:41,448 --> 00:30:43,232
I don't have to share?

612
00:30:43,276 --> 00:30:44,320
Uh-uh.

613
00:30:45,321 --> 00:30:47,410
Let's go in the car, Stacie.

614
00:30:48,542 --> 00:30:49,586
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]

615
00:30:50,109 --> 00:30:51,762
Okay, Barbie.

616
00:30:52,546 --> 00:30:53,895
Um...

617
00:30:53,939 --> 00:30:54,983
Where should we go?

618
00:30:55,810 --> 00:30:57,812
I don't know.

619
00:30:57,856 --> 00:30:59,509
Well, we can go anywhere
in the whole world.

620
00:30:59,553 --> 00:31:00,902
So, where should we go?

621
00:31:04,340 --> 00:31:06,168
Out to lunch.

622
00:31:06,212 --> 00:31:07,300
Out...

623
00:31:08,997 --> 00:31:11,217
Molly, would you like me
to take you out to lunch?

624
00:31:12,087 --> 00:31:13,219
For real?

625
00:31:13,741 --> 00:31:14,829
For real.

626
00:31:17,527 --> 00:31:18,528
[DOORBELL RINGING]

627
00:31:21,880 --> 00:31:23,142
Who is it?

628
00:31:23,185 --> 00:31:24,534
It's Lawrence Kayvey.

629
00:31:24,578 --> 00:31:25,622
Your doorman.

630
00:31:34,718 --> 00:31:36,285
Hey-hey-hey. Hey.

631
00:31:36,329 --> 00:31:37,765
How you doing?

632
00:31:37,808 --> 00:31:38,984
Wait. Ah!

633
00:31:39,027 --> 00:31:40,246
Brandon, right?

634
00:31:41,029 --> 00:31:42,117
Well.

635
00:31:42,161 --> 00:31:44,163
You kids getting
settled in okay?

636
00:31:44,206 --> 00:31:47,035
Kyle mangled his hand
in the garbage disposal.

637
00:31:47,079 --> 00:31:48,341
Well, those things happen.

638
00:31:49,342 --> 00:31:50,952
Civil War photography.

639
00:31:50,996 --> 00:31:52,693
You like photography, huh?

640
00:31:52,736 --> 00:31:54,564
-I like the Civil War.
-Yeah. Yeah.

641
00:31:54,608 --> 00:31:56,001
That was a big one.

642
00:31:56,044 --> 00:31:58,046
War Between the States,
they call it.

643
00:31:59,134 --> 00:32:00,744
You know why they call it that?

644
00:32:00,788 --> 00:32:03,095
Duh. 'Cause the states
were at war?

645
00:32:04,531 --> 00:32:05,619
[SIGHS]

646
00:32:06,707 --> 00:32:08,013
That was an easy one, huh?

647
00:32:08,056 --> 00:32:09,971
RUSS: Val? Honey?

648
00:32:10,015 --> 00:32:11,233
Hi, Lawrence.
You need something?

649
00:32:11,277 --> 00:32:12,931
No, sir. Just your express mail.

650
00:32:14,541 --> 00:32:15,629
Valerie!

651
00:32:15,672 --> 00:32:16,760
Why're you shouting?

652
00:32:16,804 --> 00:32:19,372
I'm not shouting.

653
00:32:19,415 --> 00:32:22,549
"Preliminary authentication
report on the Lincoln letter."

654
00:32:22,592 --> 00:32:24,116
An Abraham Lincoln letter?

655
00:32:24,159 --> 00:32:26,205
-Can I see it?
-Signature's real.

656
00:32:26,248 --> 00:32:28,337
Thank you
for the autograph, Abe.

657
00:32:31,688 --> 00:32:33,647
When are we going to lunch?

658
00:32:33,690 --> 00:32:35,214
Right now, honey.

659
00:32:35,257 --> 00:32:36,432
Molly and I are
going out to lunch.

660
00:32:36,476 --> 00:32:38,130
-Just the two of us.
-Now?

661
00:32:38,173 --> 00:32:39,479
Oh, no. You can't go now.

662
00:32:39,522 --> 00:32:41,655
Kyle and I are gonna go
on the hospital tour now.

663
00:32:41,698 --> 00:32:43,831
Well, so, take Brandon with you.

664
00:32:43,874 --> 00:32:44,963
I'm sure he'd love to go.

665
00:32:45,006 --> 00:32:47,400
The ammonia smell makes me hurl.

666
00:32:47,443 --> 00:32:49,663
He hurls, honey. [CHUCKLES]

667
00:32:49,706 --> 00:32:50,881
Can't he go with you?

668
00:32:52,274 --> 00:32:56,017
Is Brandon coming with
just the two of us?

669
00:32:56,061 --> 00:32:58,759
If you'd like,
I can take care of Brandon.

670
00:32:58,802 --> 00:33:00,369
-You could?
-Sure.

671
00:33:00,413 --> 00:33:02,937
I mean, if it's okay
with the big guy.

672
00:33:02,981 --> 00:33:04,243
[CHUCKLES]

673
00:33:04,286 --> 00:33:05,984
I've got TV downstairs

674
00:33:06,027 --> 00:33:07,986
and a bag of pretzels.

675
00:33:08,029 --> 00:33:09,248
What do you say, Brandon?

676
00:33:09,291 --> 00:33:11,772
TV, bag of pretzels.

677
00:33:11,815 --> 00:33:12,860
Sounds like a party.

678
00:33:13,687 --> 00:33:15,776
That's a trooper. All right.

679
00:33:15,819 --> 00:33:17,212
Here. You take this.

680
00:33:18,083 --> 00:33:20,172
Put it some place safe. There.

681
00:33:20,215 --> 00:33:21,695
Okay. We'll see you later.

682
00:33:22,391 --> 00:33:23,479
VALERIE: Have fun, Kyle.

683
00:33:24,437 --> 00:33:25,916
Brandon, are you sure it's okay?

684
00:33:25,960 --> 00:33:28,006
You could come with Molly and me
if you'd rather.

685
00:33:30,399 --> 00:33:32,619
[CHUCKLES] No, it's okay.

686
00:33:32,662 --> 00:33:35,143
I'm used to strangers
looking after me.

687
00:33:35,187 --> 00:33:36,710
He'll be fine Mrs. Syracuse.

688
00:33:36,753 --> 00:33:39,365
You and Molly go out
and have a great lunch

689
00:33:40,540 --> 00:33:42,933
and don't worry about a thing.

690
00:33:42,977 --> 00:33:45,675
KYLE: She didn't even look.
Maybe they've got some
in the back.

691
00:33:45,719 --> 00:33:47,503
Well, Kyle, I'm sure
if they did have

692
00:33:47,547 --> 00:33:49,114
any intestinal organs for sale,

693
00:33:49,157 --> 00:33:51,420
they'd be right up front
by the register.

694
00:33:51,464 --> 00:33:52,682
Russ?

695
00:33:52,726 --> 00:33:54,032
-Hey, Craig.
-Hey.

696
00:33:54,771 --> 00:33:56,295
Now, this must be

697
00:33:56,338 --> 00:33:58,166
the brilliant future surgeon
that you told me all about.

698
00:33:58,210 --> 00:33:59,254
This is the one.

699
00:33:59,298 --> 00:34:01,213
Kyle, say hello to Dr. Leff.

700
00:34:01,256 --> 00:34:02,388
Hi.

701
00:34:02,431 --> 00:34:04,564
-Very nice to know you, Kyle.
-Thanks.

702
00:34:04,607 --> 00:34:06,914
Are those real guts
on your shirt?

703
00:34:06,957 --> 00:34:08,393
Uh...

704
00:34:08,437 --> 00:34:10,004
Sorry, no. It's, uh,

705
00:34:10,047 --> 00:34:11,788
real hospital commissary food.

706
00:34:11,831 --> 00:34:12,833
-[CHUCKLES]
-But...

707
00:34:14,400 --> 00:34:16,750
I could take you to see
an operation if you'd like.

708
00:34:16,793 --> 00:34:18,099
Cool!

709
00:34:18,143 --> 00:34:19,492
RUSS: A real operation?

710
00:34:19,534 --> 00:34:21,014
'Cause remember,
blood has that

711
00:34:21,059 --> 00:34:23,452
adverse effect
on my consciousness.

712
00:34:23,496 --> 00:34:24,757
It's a routine bypass.

713
00:34:24,801 --> 00:34:26,585
You won't see much
unless they get a gusher.

714
00:34:26,629 --> 00:34:27,630
Come on, Kyle.

715
00:34:34,159 --> 00:34:35,725
-DOCTOR: Scalpel.
-[MONITOR BEEPING]

716
00:34:35,768 --> 00:34:37,639
KYLE: What's that orange stuff
they're spreading all over?

717
00:34:37,684 --> 00:34:40,252
CRAIG: That's Povidone-iodine.
it's an antiseptic.

718
00:34:40,295 --> 00:34:42,428
Keeps the patient
from developing infection.

719
00:34:43,168 --> 00:34:45,039
What're they doing now?

720
00:34:45,083 --> 00:34:48,129
Well, now, Dr. Luchessi
is using a scalpel

721
00:34:48,172 --> 00:34:50,175
to open up the
patient's chest cavity.

722
00:34:50,523 --> 00:34:52,132
Oh, boy.

723
00:34:52,177 --> 00:34:54,135
I could do that easy.

724
00:34:54,179 --> 00:34:55,484
How do they keep the guts

725
00:34:55,527 --> 00:34:56,920
from spilling onto the floor?

726
00:34:57,573 --> 00:34:59,184
Oh, jeez.

727
00:34:59,227 --> 00:35:02,578
Well, first off, you see
the internal organs
are attached.

728
00:35:02,622 --> 00:35:03,797
It's not like they're
just floating around

729
00:35:03,840 --> 00:35:05,277
inside of our bodies.

730
00:35:05,320 --> 00:35:07,714
There's some blood spillage.
But that's about it.

731
00:35:07,757 --> 00:35:09,585
-[BLOOD SQUIRTING]
-Whoa!

732
00:35:09,629 --> 00:35:11,239
Now, that's a gusher.

733
00:35:15,548 --> 00:35:17,115
[TOILET FLUSHING]

734
00:35:23,991 --> 00:35:24,992
I'm very sorry.

735
00:35:32,130 --> 00:35:33,348
Patient stopped gushing?

736
00:35:33,392 --> 00:35:34,393
Yeah. He's under control.

737
00:35:37,918 --> 00:35:39,049
You all right?

738
00:35:40,399 --> 00:35:41,965
You know, Kyle's really
something else.

739
00:35:42,009 --> 00:35:43,880
He's got a real
surgeon's mentality.

740
00:35:43,924 --> 00:35:45,708
He's ready to go down there
right now and start cutting.

741
00:35:46,100 --> 00:35:47,449
Really?

742
00:35:47,493 --> 00:35:48,755
Well, I...

743
00:35:48,798 --> 00:35:50,191
Better keep an eye
on him then, huh.

744
00:35:51,061 --> 00:35:52,106
Where is he by the way?

745
00:35:52,150 --> 00:35:53,238
Went to the bathroom.

746
00:35:54,326 --> 00:35:55,544
I just came from the bathroom.

747
00:35:55,588 --> 00:35:56,806
I didn't see him
in the bathroom.

748
00:35:56,850 --> 00:35:58,504
Well, I showed him
where the bathroom was.

749
00:35:58,547 --> 00:35:59,766
He said that's where
he was going.

750
00:35:59,809 --> 00:36:02,160
Did you actually see him
go in to the bathroom?

751
00:36:02,203 --> 00:36:04,423
Well, I didn't watch him
disappear inside
if that's what you're asking.

752
00:36:04,466 --> 00:36:06,164
Of course
that's what I'm asking!

753
00:36:06,207 --> 00:36:07,730
Oh, this is great.

754
00:36:07,774 --> 00:36:09,428
Our very first outing
and I've lost him.

755
00:36:10,907 --> 00:36:11,908
Kyle?

756
00:36:12,344 --> 00:36:13,867
Kyle!

757
00:36:13,910 --> 00:36:15,173
NURSE: Do me a favor.
Tell Mr. Newman

758
00:36:15,216 --> 00:36:17,436
I'll be in in a minute
to numb his shoulder.

759
00:36:17,479 --> 00:36:18,828
Kyle!

760
00:36:18,872 --> 00:36:20,003
[OBJECTS CLATTERING]

761
00:36:22,571 --> 00:36:24,573
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

762
00:36:24,617 --> 00:36:25,922
I'm extremely sorry.

763
00:36:27,663 --> 00:36:28,751
Oh.

764
00:36:30,536 --> 00:36:31,537
Uh-oh.

765
00:36:32,320 --> 00:36:33,408
Kyle!

766
00:36:37,412 --> 00:36:38,500
I'm sorry.

767
00:36:39,371 --> 00:36:40,502
That's blood.

768
00:36:42,983 --> 00:36:43,984
Kyle!

769
00:36:44,506 --> 00:36:45,551
Kyle!

770
00:36:48,989 --> 00:36:50,077
Kyle!

771
00:36:53,298 --> 00:36:54,299
Kyle!

772
00:36:56,301 --> 00:36:57,650
I'm very sorry.

773
00:36:57,693 --> 00:36:58,738
Kyle!

774
00:37:16,103 --> 00:37:17,496
Have you seen Kyle?

775
00:37:25,721 --> 00:37:26,853
I can't find him.

776
00:37:35,078 --> 00:37:37,167
Oh, my God!

777
00:37:39,039 --> 00:37:40,214
[OBJECTS RUMBLING]

778
00:37:42,651 --> 00:37:44,523
DOCTOR: Doctor, would you help
with this incision?

779
00:37:44,566 --> 00:37:46,699
RUSS: [SHOUTING] No!
Don't let him operate!

780
00:37:47,656 --> 00:37:49,092
He's only a kid!

781
00:37:51,225 --> 00:37:52,879
What's this guy doing in here?

782
00:37:55,664 --> 00:37:57,449
I'm extremely sorry.

783
00:37:57,492 --> 00:37:59,712
I thought it was the boy
I rented for ten days.

784
00:38:02,018 --> 00:38:03,106
[GROANING SOFTLY]

785
00:38:07,807 --> 00:38:08,938
Kyle?

786
00:38:08,982 --> 00:38:10,636
He made a detour
at the candy machine.

787
00:38:12,072 --> 00:38:13,639
Russ, you didn't?

788
00:38:13,682 --> 00:38:15,902
Hey, Mr. Syracuse,
can you get me inside?

789
00:38:21,777 --> 00:38:23,126
VALERIE: Do you like it here?

790
00:38:23,170 --> 00:38:26,173
MOLLY: Better than
the cafeteria.

791
00:38:26,216 --> 00:38:27,914
Is that where you eat
your meals, Molly?

792
00:38:27,957 --> 00:38:29,524
In the cafeteria?

793
00:38:29,568 --> 00:38:32,222
One time I fell off
the monkey bars

794
00:38:32,266 --> 00:38:34,399
and the nurse let me
eat in her office.

795
00:38:34,442 --> 00:38:36,096
But then I barfed,

796
00:38:36,923 --> 00:38:38,185
and she yelled at me

797
00:38:38,228 --> 00:38:40,666
because I got it all over
her new shoes.

798
00:38:40,709 --> 00:38:41,841
[SOFTLY] Okay.

799
00:38:43,016 --> 00:38:44,409
Here you are, ladies.

800
00:38:44,452 --> 00:38:45,540
Thank you.

801
00:38:46,454 --> 00:38:48,804
Your daughter is such a delight.

802
00:38:48,848 --> 00:38:50,632
Oh, no. Well,
she's not actually...

803
00:38:54,070 --> 00:38:56,116
She really is a delight.
Thank you.

804
00:39:00,555 --> 00:39:02,905
So, what are you hungry for?

805
00:39:02,949 --> 00:39:04,994
What are you hungry for?

806
00:39:05,038 --> 00:39:06,344
I don't know.
Should we have a look?

807
00:39:09,956 --> 00:39:13,568
Okay. They've got Waldorf salad.
Do you like salad?

808
00:39:13,612 --> 00:39:16,310
Sometimes cucumbers
give me hives.

809
00:39:17,398 --> 00:39:19,095
Well, then maybe not.

810
00:39:19,139 --> 00:39:21,359
They have a terrific
seafood dishes.

811
00:39:21,402 --> 00:39:22,577
Sauteed scallops.

812
00:39:24,753 --> 00:39:26,886
Chicken. They have
chicken cordon blue.

813
00:39:27,930 --> 00:39:28,975
Ladies,

814
00:39:29,584 --> 00:39:31,499
have you decided?

815
00:39:31,543 --> 00:39:34,197
Yes. I would like
the oysters, please.

816
00:39:34,241 --> 00:39:36,199
-Hmm-mm.
-And trout almandine,

817
00:39:36,243 --> 00:39:38,027
no salt, very little oil,

818
00:39:38,071 --> 00:39:40,421
baked potato dry and no butter
on my asparagus.

819
00:39:40,465 --> 00:39:42,075
Very good.

820
00:39:42,118 --> 00:39:44,120
And for the little lady?

821
00:39:44,164 --> 00:39:45,905
Do you have grilled cheese?

822
00:39:47,950 --> 00:39:49,212
Grilled cheese?

823
00:39:51,476 --> 00:39:52,738
Cheese, grilled?

824
00:39:52,781 --> 00:39:53,913
White bread.

825
00:39:54,479 --> 00:39:55,654
No burnt, please.

826
00:39:56,568 --> 00:39:57,612
Mmm-hmm.

827
00:40:02,661 --> 00:40:04,010
You know what?

828
00:40:04,053 --> 00:40:05,838
Grilled cheese sounds great.
I'll have the same.

829
00:40:08,275 --> 00:40:09,972
Two grilled cheese.

830
00:40:10,016 --> 00:40:11,060
No burnt.

831
00:40:14,760 --> 00:40:15,804
[CHUCKLES]

832
00:40:20,374 --> 00:40:21,375
[SLOW MUSIC PLAYING]

833
00:40:23,290 --> 00:40:24,596
Your move, Lawrence.

834
00:40:24,639 --> 00:40:25,640
Call me Larry.

835
00:40:26,685 --> 00:40:28,600
Lawrence is my
professional name.

836
00:40:28,643 --> 00:40:30,602
Is that why you are so nice
to everybody all the time?

837
00:40:31,472 --> 00:40:32,778
You're being professional?

838
00:40:32,821 --> 00:40:36,129
What? I can't just be
a friendly kind of guy?

839
00:40:38,000 --> 00:40:39,437
Okay.

840
00:40:39,480 --> 00:40:41,439
It is also my job.
But what am I gonna do?

841
00:40:41,482 --> 00:40:42,657
Sit around and mope about it?

842
00:40:44,093 --> 00:40:45,443
I wanted to be a shortstop,

843
00:40:47,488 --> 00:40:48,576
but I'm a doorman.

844
00:40:48,620 --> 00:40:50,709
I think you made
the right choice.

845
00:40:50,752 --> 00:40:53,799
Well, sometimes, Brandon,
you don't get to choose.

846
00:40:53,842 --> 00:40:56,366
And as hard as it is,
you just have to move on.

847
00:41:00,153 --> 00:41:02,938
-Check.
-Anyway, I figure
if I'm gonna be a doorman,

848
00:41:02,982 --> 00:41:04,940
I might as well be

849
00:41:04,984 --> 00:41:06,289
the best doorman

850
00:41:06,333 --> 00:41:09,379
in the history of doorman.

851
00:41:09,423 --> 00:41:11,469
Wait a second. You are actually
giving me advice?

852
00:41:12,774 --> 00:41:14,472
I'm fine. You're the one
who is in check.

853
00:41:15,821 --> 00:41:17,126
[PAWN RATTLES]

854
00:41:17,170 --> 00:41:18,214
Checkmate.

855
00:41:22,392 --> 00:41:23,959
Brandon,

856
00:41:24,003 --> 00:41:26,092
you ever hear this one?

857
00:41:26,135 --> 00:41:27,746
"Nice things
happen to nice people"?

858
00:41:28,964 --> 00:41:30,400
Yeah.

859
00:41:30,444 --> 00:41:31,706
My mom used to say that.

860
00:41:33,012 --> 00:41:34,404
Didn't work for her, did it?

861
00:41:43,675 --> 00:41:45,154
All right. Come and get it.

862
00:41:45,198 --> 00:41:47,069
Here's the popcorn-man.

863
00:41:47,113 --> 00:41:48,680
What is this thing?

864
00:41:48,723 --> 00:41:51,378
That is my massage chair.

865
00:41:51,421 --> 00:41:54,599
It's a chair
that kind of massages.

866
00:41:54,642 --> 00:41:57,297
Russ' back hurts him
once in a while.
It helps it feel better.

867
00:41:58,167 --> 00:41:59,821
What's this button for?

868
00:42:00,648 --> 00:42:02,737
No. That button tells that

869
00:42:02,781 --> 00:42:04,347
chair just how hard
to work, huh.

870
00:42:04,391 --> 00:42:07,437
And it works just the way
Russ likes it.

871
00:42:07,481 --> 00:42:08,917
There we go. Thank you.

872
00:42:10,484 --> 00:42:12,268
Kids, this is an adult chair.

873
00:42:12,312 --> 00:42:13,922
So, we won't be touching it.

874
00:42:13,966 --> 00:42:15,097
Okay?

875
00:42:15,141 --> 00:42:17,447
Do you have any paper
I could draw on?

876
00:42:17,491 --> 00:42:18,753
Paper is good.

877
00:42:18,797 --> 00:42:20,929
With a pencil, not on the couch.

878
00:42:20,973 --> 00:42:22,670
It's in my briefcase,
right on the counter.

879
00:42:23,671 --> 00:42:24,977
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]

880
00:42:25,020 --> 00:42:28,067
So, everyone have
a pretty good day?

881
00:42:28,110 --> 00:42:29,590
Generally speaking?

882
00:42:29,634 --> 00:42:32,419
I think I saw Lawrence's face
on America's Most Wanted.

883
00:42:32,462 --> 00:42:33,855
Maybe we should call the police.

884
00:42:33,899 --> 00:42:35,248
[CHUCKLES]

885
00:42:35,291 --> 00:42:36,771
Boy, Brandon, you certainly like

886
00:42:36,815 --> 00:42:38,947
to use that imagination,
don't you?

887
00:42:38,991 --> 00:42:41,994
He lies all the time.
Don't believe anything he says.

888
00:42:42,037 --> 00:42:43,735
I do lie sometimes, Molly.

889
00:42:43,778 --> 00:42:46,128
But that gum you swallowed
was radioactive.

890
00:42:47,303 --> 00:42:50,437
[CHUCKLING]
He's just teasing, honey.

891
00:42:50,480 --> 00:42:52,961
And you will grow
to abnormal proportions.

892
00:42:53,005 --> 00:42:54,833
Brandon... Brandon,
I think you're

893
00:42:54,876 --> 00:42:56,530
scaring your
little sister there, aren't you?

894
00:42:56,574 --> 00:42:58,358
Fine. But she'll wake up
tomorrow morning

895
00:42:58,401 --> 00:43:00,099
nine-feet tall
and glowing like a light bulb.

896
00:43:04,364 --> 00:43:06,192
Hey, we're supposed
to make 'em like us.

897
00:43:06,845 --> 00:43:07,976
[DOORBELL RINGING]

898
00:43:14,766 --> 00:43:16,158
Good evening, Mr. Syracuse.

899
00:43:16,202 --> 00:43:18,770
I took the liberty
of stopping by the vet

900
00:43:18,813 --> 00:43:21,076
to pick up your dog
and I'm delighted to say

901
00:43:21,120 --> 00:43:23,078
he's as healthy as a horse.

902
00:43:23,992 --> 00:43:25,298
He is a horse.

903
00:43:25,341 --> 00:43:28,823
VALERIE: Oh, my God.

904
00:43:28,867 --> 00:43:30,042
RUSS: It's not my dog.

905
00:43:31,043 --> 00:43:32,653
You brought me the wrong dog.

906
00:43:32,697 --> 00:43:35,700
[CHUCKLES] My dog
is a completely different dog.

907
00:43:35,743 --> 00:43:38,006
-What's his name?
-HARRY: Mr. Twixel.

908
00:43:38,703 --> 00:43:40,356
I believe, isn't it?

909
00:43:40,400 --> 00:43:42,576
Molly, you're really
a very lucky girl.

910
00:43:42,620 --> 00:43:44,186
I talked to Mrs. Lachman
this afternoon.

911
00:43:44,230 --> 00:43:45,535
You know what they've done?

912
00:43:45,579 --> 00:43:47,494
They've got you
your very own swing set.

913
00:43:48,277 --> 00:43:49,583
That's very nice of them,

914
00:43:49,627 --> 00:43:52,151
but it's not over
until the fat lady sings.

915
00:43:52,194 --> 00:43:53,369
Not at all.

916
00:43:53,413 --> 00:43:54,980
Sings what?

917
00:43:55,023 --> 00:43:58,113
Hi, I'm Molly and these are
my brothers Brandon and Kyle.

918
00:43:58,157 --> 00:43:59,724
You already know
your mom and dad.

919
00:44:09,690 --> 00:44:11,083
-[DOG BARKS]
-[CHUCKLING]

920
00:44:12,780 --> 00:44:15,565
Is there anything more precious

921
00:44:15,609 --> 00:44:17,655
-than a little girl
and her pooch?
-[KIDS CHUCKLING]

922
00:44:17,698 --> 00:44:19,221
That is not a pooch.

923
00:44:19,265 --> 00:44:20,875
That is a brontosaurus.

924
00:44:20,919 --> 00:44:22,921
Now, you said you'd
rent us a dog.

925
00:44:22,964 --> 00:44:25,619
Now, I want you take
Trigger out of here

926
00:44:25,663 --> 00:44:27,403
and I want you to bring
us back a tiny,

927
00:44:27,447 --> 00:44:28,927
tiny little dog.

928
00:44:28,970 --> 00:44:31,756
-Look... [LAUGHING]
-[DOG WHIMPERING]

929
00:44:31,799 --> 00:44:33,627
-[HARRY LAUGHING]
-Are you hungry?

930
00:44:37,326 --> 00:44:38,893
Honey,

931
00:44:38,937 --> 00:44:42,810
why don't we let Mr. Twixel
stay the night

932
00:44:42,854 --> 00:44:44,856
and then Harry can bring us
another dog tomorrow.

933
00:44:44,899 --> 00:44:46,553
Tomorrow?

934
00:44:46,596 --> 00:44:49,034
By tomorrow he may eat through
to the next apartment.

935
00:44:49,077 --> 00:44:51,340
Oh, I doubt that Mr. Syracuse.

936
00:44:51,384 --> 00:44:53,081
He won't make
that mistake again.

937
00:44:53,821 --> 00:44:54,909
One minute.

938
00:44:57,346 --> 00:44:59,131
KYLE: Whoa, you're a big fella!

939
00:44:59,174 --> 00:45:03,048
Now, Mr. Twixel eats three
hearty meals a day.

940
00:45:03,091 --> 00:45:05,267
However, and this is important,

941
00:45:05,311 --> 00:45:06,747
no fried foods.

942
00:45:06,791 --> 00:45:07,922
Good night.

943
00:45:14,320 --> 00:45:16,365
We'll put away the breakables.

944
00:45:16,409 --> 00:45:17,410
How bad can it be?

945
00:45:46,352 --> 00:45:47,527
[DOOR OPENS]

946
00:45:57,232 --> 00:45:59,147
How do you like
being a mom so far?

947
00:46:01,759 --> 00:46:03,238
I liked a lot about today.

948
00:46:07,547 --> 00:46:12,030
Sometimes I just wanted to hold
Molly close and never let go.

949
00:46:13,640 --> 00:46:15,511
And then, other times

950
00:46:15,555 --> 00:46:17,122
I felt so trapped.

951
00:46:17,165 --> 00:46:18,601
Like my life wasn't
my own any more.

952
00:46:18,645 --> 00:46:20,560
It was being controlled
by these... [EXHALES DEEPLY]

953
00:46:20,603 --> 00:46:21,735
small people.

954
00:46:21,779 --> 00:46:22,780
[CHUCKLES]

955
00:46:24,999 --> 00:46:26,914
I don't think I know yet.
How about you?

956
00:46:28,655 --> 00:46:30,222
Well,

957
00:46:30,265 --> 00:46:32,441
I think I'm learning
a very valuable lesson.

958
00:46:34,400 --> 00:46:35,444
Hmm.

959
00:46:45,977 --> 00:46:46,978
[RAIN PATTERING]
[THUNDER RUMBLING]

960
00:46:57,379 --> 00:46:58,598
It's weird.

961
00:46:59,251 --> 00:47:00,339
What?

962
00:47:02,907 --> 00:47:04,386
What did you do
when you were a little kid

963
00:47:04,430 --> 00:47:05,474
and you heard thunder?

964
00:47:07,781 --> 00:47:09,391
I ran into my parents' room.

965
00:47:18,139 --> 00:47:19,532
Oh, honey, come on.

966
00:47:19,575 --> 00:47:21,751
I mean, they're tough kids.

967
00:47:23,144 --> 00:47:24,276
They've had to be.

968
00:47:26,539 --> 00:47:28,758
I guess in nine days
they'll be that much tougher.

969
00:47:35,765 --> 00:47:37,289
-Hi.
-Hi.

970
00:47:38,638 --> 00:47:40,161
[CHUCKLING]

971
00:47:46,428 --> 00:47:47,516
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

972
00:47:49,649 --> 00:47:50,955
The kids.

973
00:47:50,998 --> 00:47:52,521
Now, you be nice.

974
00:47:52,565 --> 00:47:53,783
I'm always nice.

975
00:47:58,963 --> 00:48:00,225
Coming!

976
00:48:06,318 --> 00:48:07,449
[VALERIE SCREAMS]

977
00:48:43,007 --> 00:48:44,138
[DOG WHINING]

978
00:48:53,191 --> 00:48:55,062
I can see this dog

979
00:48:55,106 --> 00:48:56,846
is going to be a big,

980
00:48:56,890 --> 00:48:58,065
big problem.

981
00:49:10,034 --> 00:49:12,384
When will breakfast be served?

982
00:49:15,691 --> 00:49:16,823
[CHUCKLES]

983
00:49:59,518 --> 00:50:00,519
[VALERIE SCREAMS]

984
00:50:48,088 --> 00:50:49,524
[WHISPERING]
...ever do.

985
00:51:12,895 --> 00:51:14,245
[WHISPERING]
I'll move them later.

986
00:51:36,005 --> 00:51:37,442
-Thank you, my dear.
-Oh, you're welcome.

987
00:51:58,854 --> 00:51:59,855
Molly?

988
00:52:01,509 --> 00:52:03,772
Did you ever turn those
stereo knobs back down?

989
00:52:08,299 --> 00:52:09,604
[SPARKS]

990
00:52:10,214 --> 00:52:12,477
[ALL GASP]

991
00:52:12,520 --> 00:52:16,089
I don't think our
behaving plan's
working too well.

992
00:52:20,006 --> 00:52:22,443
Dan, you made this seem
kind of important.

993
00:52:22,487 --> 00:52:23,662
[CHUCKLES]

994
00:52:23,705 --> 00:52:25,185
What's going on?

995
00:52:25,229 --> 00:52:26,273
Your partners
haven't skipped town

996
00:52:26,317 --> 00:52:27,492
with all our money now,
have they?

997
00:52:27,535 --> 00:52:29,450
[LAUGHS] No, nothing
quite that bad, no.

998
00:52:29,494 --> 00:52:30,669
[BOTH CHUCKLE]

999
00:52:30,712 --> 00:52:32,540
So, how is the auction coming?

1000
00:52:32,584 --> 00:52:34,238
Dan told me about
the Lincoln letter.

1001
00:52:34,281 --> 00:52:35,500
How fascinating.

1002
00:52:35,543 --> 00:52:37,066
It's great. It's a great piece.

1003
00:52:37,110 --> 00:52:38,285
It's in terrific shape.

1004
00:52:38,329 --> 00:52:40,548
It's full of
historical significance.

1005
00:52:40,592 --> 00:52:42,159
It couldn't be better.

1006
00:52:42,202 --> 00:52:43,943
We're optimistic it's going to
bring us a hundred thousand.

1007
00:52:43,986 --> 00:52:45,640
That's good to hear.

1008
00:52:47,207 --> 00:52:48,774
Now, why, Dan?

1009
00:52:48,817 --> 00:52:50,471
Why is that good to hear?

1010
00:52:50,515 --> 00:52:52,343
-Uh.
-WAITER: Here you go, ma'am.

1011
00:52:52,386 --> 00:52:54,736
No, no thanks. Nothing for us.

1012
00:52:57,174 --> 00:52:59,393
-Are you guys pregnant?
-[BOTH LAUGHING]

1013
00:53:01,178 --> 00:53:03,789
Eleven weeks. We just found out
a couple days ago.

1014
00:53:03,832 --> 00:53:05,747
Well, hey, that's wonderful.

1015
00:53:05,791 --> 00:53:08,359
That's wonderful.
That's great news.

1016
00:53:08,402 --> 00:53:11,231
Yeah, it really is. We didn't
even know you were trying.

1017
00:53:11,275 --> 00:53:13,886
So, six months from now,
no more just jumping in the car

1018
00:53:13,929 --> 00:53:15,409
and driving down to the club.

1019
00:53:15,453 --> 00:53:16,802
We're gonna have to find
ourselves a babysitter first.

1020
00:53:16,845 --> 00:53:18,282
That's right. [CHUCKLES]

1021
00:53:18,325 --> 00:53:20,284
You're gonna have to find
yourselves a babysitter.

1022
00:53:20,327 --> 00:53:21,328
[CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY]

1023
00:53:22,329 --> 00:53:23,461
[GASPS]

1024
00:53:23,504 --> 00:53:27,116
-The kids! Cheque!
-What kids?

1025
00:53:27,160 --> 00:53:28,335
RUSS: What are we
gonna say to them?

1026
00:53:28,379 --> 00:53:29,597
VALERIE: Anything but the truth.

1027
00:53:31,338 --> 00:53:32,513
[DOOR OPENS]

1028
00:53:32,557 --> 00:53:33,558
Kids!

1029
00:53:35,299 --> 00:53:37,779
Hey, there they are.

1030
00:53:38,737 --> 00:53:40,739
See, I told you they'd be back.

1031
00:53:40,782 --> 00:53:43,220
-Hi.
-[SIGHS]

1032
00:53:43,263 --> 00:53:44,873
Gosh, yeah.
Of course we're back.

1033
00:53:44,917 --> 00:53:46,266
[BOTH LAUGH]

1034
00:53:46,310 --> 00:53:48,007
Look, Val and I...

1035
00:53:48,050 --> 00:53:50,488
See, she thought I was home,
I thought she was...

1036
00:53:50,531 --> 00:53:53,055
-You forgot about us.
-No.

1037
00:53:53,099 --> 00:53:54,883
No, no. That's not
what happened at all.

1038
00:53:54,927 --> 00:53:56,233
[INDISTINCT SHOUTING ON TV]

1039
00:53:58,887 --> 00:53:59,888
Actually, yeah.

1040
00:54:01,194 --> 00:54:03,022
That's what happened.

1041
00:54:03,065 --> 00:54:04,763
Uh, the truth is,

1042
00:54:04,806 --> 00:54:08,723
we've never had
anyone else in our lives

1043
00:54:08,767 --> 00:54:12,249
that we had to be
responsible for.

1044
00:54:14,512 --> 00:54:16,209
And that's no excuse at all.

1045
00:54:17,602 --> 00:54:18,951
Guys, we're very, very sorry.

1046
00:54:22,128 --> 00:54:24,913
Was that a "I forgive you"
shrug?

1047
00:54:25,653 --> 00:54:27,612
Or was that a...

1048
00:54:27,655 --> 00:54:29,222
"I don't wanna know
from you" shrug?

1049
00:54:47,066 --> 00:54:49,938
Listen, I don't know
what happened.

1050
00:54:49,982 --> 00:54:52,201
We just kind of forgot.

1051
00:54:52,245 --> 00:54:53,855
[SCOFFS] It's no problem.

1052
00:54:55,161 --> 00:54:57,206
I figured when you
didn't get home on time,

1053
00:54:58,382 --> 00:54:59,861
must have been
something like that.

1054
00:54:59,905 --> 00:55:01,820
But they were okay?

1055
00:55:01,863 --> 00:55:05,606
The little one
was a bit worried.

1056
00:55:05,650 --> 00:55:07,216
But otherwise they were champs.

1057
00:55:09,131 --> 00:55:10,394
What about the animal?

1058
00:55:11,656 --> 00:55:13,266
I haven't heard
a peep all night.

1059
00:55:16,313 --> 00:55:17,531
Thank you, Lawrence.

1060
00:55:18,184 --> 00:55:19,185
I owe you one.

1061
00:55:23,407 --> 00:55:24,930
Molly?

1062
00:55:26,758 --> 00:55:29,630
Molly, we're really sorry.

1063
00:55:29,674 --> 00:55:32,677
We would never, ever,
just go away

1064
00:55:32,720 --> 00:55:34,331
and never come back, honey.

1065
00:55:34,374 --> 00:55:36,245
That's what my real mom did.

1066
00:55:38,683 --> 00:55:39,684
Mmm.

1067
00:55:40,989 --> 00:55:43,601
I promise you,
we'll never go away

1068
00:55:43,644 --> 00:55:44,863
and leave you guys
like that again.

1069
00:55:45,777 --> 00:55:46,908
Okay, Molly?

1070
00:55:46,952 --> 00:55:49,041
You mean, you're gonna adopt us?

1071
00:55:49,084 --> 00:55:50,347
All of us?

1072
00:55:51,130 --> 00:55:52,131
Uh...

1073
00:55:54,307 --> 00:55:57,179
Molly, sweetie,

1074
00:55:57,223 --> 00:55:59,356
you're already
gonna be adopted, remember?

1075
00:56:00,444 --> 00:56:03,185
Mr. and Mrs. Lachman?
The swing set?

1076
00:56:05,449 --> 00:56:06,406
She'll be fine.

1077
00:56:07,581 --> 00:56:08,800
She just misunderstood.

1078
00:56:12,412 --> 00:56:13,370
[VALERIE SIGHS]

1079
00:56:15,284 --> 00:56:16,677
[CHILDREN CHATTERING]

1080
00:56:30,343 --> 00:56:31,431
[DOOR LOCK OPENS]

1081
00:56:31,475 --> 00:56:34,173
Mr. and Mrs. Lachman
here to see you.

1082
00:56:34,216 --> 00:56:36,044
Uh, come in, folks. Take a seat.

1083
00:56:40,048 --> 00:56:42,964
I thought I told you
to wear civilian clothes.

1084
00:56:43,008 --> 00:56:44,923
Sorry, I forgot.

1085
00:56:44,966 --> 00:56:46,577
You've got to think, Miguel.

1086
00:56:46,620 --> 00:56:48,492
You know it's our brains that
separate us from the animals.

1087
00:56:49,144 --> 00:56:50,755
Well, now...

1088
00:56:50,798 --> 00:56:53,061
What can I do for
you nice folks today?

1089
00:56:53,105 --> 00:56:54,585
Well, actually, we were supposed

1090
00:56:54,628 --> 00:56:57,457
to be with my parents in Boston
for the holiday, but...

1091
00:56:57,501 --> 00:57:00,242
But we decided we just couldn't
live another day without Molly.

1092
00:57:00,286 --> 00:57:03,898
Oh, I understand your feelings
completely, Mrs. Lachman.

1093
00:57:03,942 --> 00:57:06,205
Now, what can I do
for you nice folks today?

1094
00:57:07,772 --> 00:57:10,470
We'd like for Molly to come
spend Thanksgiving with us.

1095
00:57:10,514 --> 00:57:12,080
We spoke with
your son last night

1096
00:57:12,124 --> 00:57:13,473
and he said there wouldn't
be a problem.

1097
00:57:13,517 --> 00:57:15,475
Oh, no. No, no problem.

1098
00:57:15,519 --> 00:57:17,216
Unfortunately, Molly isn't here.

1099
00:57:17,259 --> 00:57:19,479
-She's not here?
-Uh, where is she?

1100
00:57:19,523 --> 00:57:22,090
Well, that's confidential
information, Mr. Lachman.

1101
00:57:22,134 --> 00:57:23,701
I tell you, you slip to somebody

1102
00:57:23,744 --> 00:57:26,834
and the next thing you know,
we're on a mailing list.

1103
00:57:26,878 --> 00:57:29,533
What? What's he talking
about a mailing list?

1104
00:57:29,576 --> 00:57:31,448
The bottom line is
that Molly and her brothers

1105
00:57:31,491 --> 00:57:32,971
are going to have
Thanksgiving dinner

1106
00:57:33,014 --> 00:57:34,712
with a very nice couple I met
in a Mexican restaurant.

1107
00:57:34,755 --> 00:57:35,974
Now you have to agree that

1108
00:57:36,017 --> 00:57:38,280
that opportunity doesn't
come along very often.

1109
00:57:40,065 --> 00:57:42,589
I think maybe
we just better call Mr. Haber.

1110
00:57:42,633 --> 00:57:43,677
I think that's a good idea.

1111
00:57:43,721 --> 00:57:45,287
No need to call Cliff.

1112
00:57:45,331 --> 00:57:47,638
Molly will be back in the shop
first thing Friday morning.

1113
00:57:47,681 --> 00:57:50,336
I can have her cleaned up
and out the door by noon.

1114
00:57:53,121 --> 00:57:54,775
[DOOR CLOSES]

1115
00:57:54,819 --> 00:57:56,995
No wonder poor Cliff
is getting an ulcer.

1116
00:57:59,040 --> 00:58:00,041
BRANDON: Kyle?

1117
00:58:04,350 --> 00:58:05,351
Kyle?

1118
00:58:27,895 --> 00:58:29,506
VALERIE: Are you saying
we're broke?

1119
00:58:29,549 --> 00:58:30,637
TERESA: No, that is
not what we're saying.

1120
00:58:30,681 --> 00:58:31,943
You're nowhere near broke.

1121
00:58:31,986 --> 00:58:33,510
DAN: But you put
the bulk of your money

1122
00:58:33,553 --> 00:58:34,989
into real estate partnerships

1123
00:58:35,033 --> 00:58:36,251
and those properties
have undergone

1124
00:58:36,295 --> 00:58:39,385
some very serious depreciation.

1125
00:58:39,428 --> 00:58:41,343
TERESA: The important thing
is to curb your expenses

1126
00:58:41,387 --> 00:58:43,824
and stick to this budget
until we can regroup.

1127
00:58:43,868 --> 00:58:45,609
RUSS: Yeah, well,
I think the important thing

1128
00:58:45,652 --> 00:58:48,263
is that this auction
makes a lot of money.

1129
00:58:48,307 --> 00:58:50,701
DAN: Do you hear that,
Mr. Lincoln?

1130
00:58:50,744 --> 00:58:52,311
TERESA: We have a lunch meeting,

1131
00:58:52,354 --> 00:58:54,443
so if you'll look over the
budget, we'll talk later, okay?

1132
00:58:54,487 --> 00:58:56,663
RUSS: Okay.
Thanks for the good news.

1133
00:58:56,707 --> 00:58:58,012
[DOOR OPENS]

1134
00:59:00,624 --> 00:59:02,887
Brandon, were you
out here listening?

1135
00:59:02,930 --> 00:59:04,453
Uh-uh. I just wanted to tell

1136
00:59:04,497 --> 00:59:06,107
you guys something
about this letter.

1137
00:59:06,151 --> 00:59:08,066
Brandon, what are you doing?

1138
00:59:08,109 --> 00:59:09,850
This is a very adult thing.

1139
00:59:09,894 --> 00:59:12,157
It's definitely
not for touching.

1140
00:59:12,200 --> 00:59:13,767
[SIGHS] I don't
think it's right.

1141
00:59:13,811 --> 00:59:15,682
Of course it's not right.

1142
00:59:15,726 --> 00:59:16,988
It's never right
to touch somebody's

1143
00:59:17,031 --> 00:59:18,076
Lincoln letter
without permission.

1144
00:59:18,119 --> 00:59:19,207
[STAMMERING] I don't mean that.

1145
00:59:20,165 --> 00:59:21,166
I think it's fake.

1146
00:59:23,429 --> 00:59:24,778
Val, you wanna...

1147
00:59:26,388 --> 00:59:28,826
Come on, I'll show
you downstairs.

1148
00:59:28,869 --> 00:59:30,305
I'm not lying.

1149
00:59:30,349 --> 00:59:34,745
Lincoln wasn't at the
Hotel Savoy on May 8th, 1863.

1150
00:59:34,788 --> 00:59:37,704
He was at his sister's farm
outside Rochester.

1151
00:59:37,748 --> 00:59:39,967
I read it in that Civil War book
you bought me.

1152
00:59:40,011 --> 00:59:43,231
Brandon, I don't know if this is
some kind of bid for attention,

1153
00:59:43,275 --> 00:59:45,843
but in this house
we don't reward lying.

1154
00:59:47,366 --> 00:59:49,324
But he wasn't at the hotel.

1155
00:59:58,856 --> 01:00:01,162
I can't wait until Thanksgiving.

1156
01:00:01,206 --> 01:00:04,078
Me neither. Just us
and Russ and Valerie.

1157
01:00:04,122 --> 01:00:05,689
Like a real family.

1158
01:00:05,732 --> 01:00:09,606
Yeah, for a couple
more days anyway.

1159
01:00:09,649 --> 01:00:12,043
You mean they're not
going to adopt us?

1160
01:00:12,086 --> 01:00:14,219
I don't think we should
hold our breath.

1161
01:00:14,262 --> 01:00:16,177
They like us pretty much,
don't they?

1162
01:00:16,221 --> 01:00:17,744
And they want kids.

1163
01:00:17,788 --> 01:00:19,964
You think they want kids
who've blown out their stereos,

1164
01:00:20,007 --> 01:00:21,618
spilled milk
on their furniture,

1165
01:00:21,661 --> 01:00:23,881
left gum in their car?

1166
01:00:23,924 --> 01:00:25,883
Besides, they think
I'm just a big liar.

1167
01:00:25,926 --> 01:00:27,928
You are a big liar.

1168
01:00:27,972 --> 01:00:29,234
Sometimes I'm not.

1169
01:00:31,671 --> 01:00:33,064
Besides, they're having
money problems

1170
01:00:33,107 --> 01:00:34,674
and they can't afford
to keep us anyway.

1171
01:00:34,718 --> 01:00:36,633
What's "money problems"?

1172
01:00:36,676 --> 01:00:37,938
It means they don't
have enough money

1173
01:00:37,982 --> 01:00:39,636
to buy stuff like margarine.

1174
01:00:41,638 --> 01:00:43,378
How do you know they do?

1175
01:00:43,422 --> 01:00:45,250
I heard them talking
to their lawyers,

1176
01:00:45,293 --> 01:00:46,555
or whatever they were.

1177
01:00:48,035 --> 01:00:49,471
Maybe we could help them.

1178
01:00:49,515 --> 01:00:51,386
Maybe we could help them
get more money.

1179
01:00:51,430 --> 01:00:52,736
BRANDON:
That's a nice idea, Kyle,

1180
01:00:52,779 --> 01:00:54,825
but we'd probably
have to rob a bank or something.

1181
01:00:58,393 --> 01:01:00,569
[DOOR BELL RINGS]

1182
01:01:05,487 --> 01:01:06,924
-Lawrence, hi.
-Hi.

1183
01:01:06,967 --> 01:01:09,317
-Thanks for coming.
-No problem.

1184
01:01:09,361 --> 01:01:10,449
Auction day, huh?

1185
01:01:11,102 --> 01:01:12,494
You know how it is.

1186
01:01:12,538 --> 01:01:14,018
Um, It's just gonna be Molly,

1187
01:01:14,061 --> 01:01:15,846
-the boys are coming with us.
-Oh, great.

1188
01:01:15,889 --> 01:01:17,151
MOLLY: Larry, come and watch
T.V. with me.

1189
01:01:17,195 --> 01:01:18,457
Gonna show them
the family business, huh?

1190
01:01:18,500 --> 01:01:19,588
Yeah.

1191
01:01:21,982 --> 01:01:24,071
Sharp suit, Mr. Syracuse.

1192
01:01:24,115 --> 01:01:25,638
Much better than last year's.

1193
01:01:25,682 --> 01:01:27,161
Thank you, Lawrence.

1194
01:01:27,205 --> 01:01:29,860
LARRY: Hey, circus movie.
Just what I was hoping for.

1195
01:01:31,339 --> 01:01:33,298
-What was wrong with last year?
-[VALERIE CHUCKLES]

1196
01:01:40,609 --> 01:01:43,525
ANNOUNCER: [ON TV] And we'll be 
right back after this.

1197
01:01:43,569 --> 01:01:46,964
ANNOUNCER 2: [ON TV] 
Someone will win this 
Value Digest Sweepstakes award.

1198
01:01:47,007 --> 01:01:48,487
Why not you?

1199
01:01:48,530 --> 01:01:50,532
Send a short letter 
telling us why you think

1200
01:01:50,576 --> 01:01:53,535
you should win $2 million 
to this address.

1201
01:01:53,579 --> 01:01:56,277
-Rememberize that, okay?
-Okay.

1202
01:02:08,246 --> 01:02:09,726
RUSS: Woah,
slow down there, honey.

1203
01:02:09,769 --> 01:02:11,379
Where you going so fast?

1204
01:02:11,423 --> 01:02:13,164
I am going to win us
some money.

1205
01:02:13,207 --> 01:02:15,644
Really? Val, you ready?

1206
01:02:15,688 --> 01:02:17,951
-You got the Lincoln letter?
-I have got the Lincoln letter.

1207
01:02:21,215 --> 01:02:22,869
I thought you said
that wasn't real.

1208
01:02:22,913 --> 01:02:24,305
Well, they don't
wanna believe me.

1209
01:02:26,917 --> 01:02:28,353
[DOOR CLOSES]

1210
01:02:28,396 --> 01:02:31,748
That's Florida. F-l-o...

1211
01:02:32,531 --> 01:02:33,575
Yeah?

1212
01:02:33,619 --> 01:02:34,794
R-i...

1213
01:02:36,622 --> 01:02:37,666
Yeah?

1214
01:02:37,710 --> 01:02:39,277
D-a.

1215
01:02:41,758 --> 01:02:43,498
Do you have an envelope?

1216
01:02:43,542 --> 01:02:45,631
Uh-huh. Downstairs I do.

1217
01:02:51,506 --> 01:02:53,117
I sure hope
Russ and Valerie know

1218
01:02:53,160 --> 01:02:54,771
what you're trying
to do for them.

1219
01:03:13,615 --> 01:03:14,965
RUSS: Molly!

1220
01:03:34,158 --> 01:03:35,289
Molly!

1221
01:03:35,333 --> 01:03:36,900
-[DOG WHIMPERING]
-Lay down!

1222
01:03:37,857 --> 01:03:39,816
You're home!

1223
01:03:39,859 --> 01:03:40,904
Where's my Lincoln letter?

1224
01:03:41,774 --> 01:03:42,862
Your what, sir?

1225
01:03:42,906 --> 01:03:43,994
This morning,
it was in a briefcase

1226
01:03:44,037 --> 01:03:46,126
Now, there is
a candy bar there, melted.

1227
01:03:47,040 --> 01:03:48,520
-Oops.
-"Oops"?

1228
01:03:48,563 --> 01:03:49,869
What does that mean?

1229
01:03:49,913 --> 01:03:51,349
What does that mean, "oops"?

1230
01:03:52,002 --> 01:03:53,090
Molly,

1231
01:03:55,962 --> 01:03:59,052
the paper you used to write
to the Sweepstakes Company,

1232
01:03:59,096 --> 01:04:00,706
was that in Russ's briefcase?

1233
01:04:00,749 --> 01:04:01,838
You wrote on it?

1234
01:04:01,881 --> 01:04:03,535
You wrote on my Lincoln letter?

1235
01:04:03,578 --> 01:04:05,276
I'm sure she had no idea
it was...

1236
01:04:05,319 --> 01:04:06,494
Where is it?

1237
01:04:10,194 --> 01:04:11,412
Mailman took it.

1238
01:04:11,456 --> 01:04:14,546
The mailman took
my Lincoln letter?

1239
01:04:14,589 --> 01:04:15,895
-I'm sorry.
-Oh, no, honey,

1240
01:04:15,939 --> 01:04:18,332
-It's not your fault...
-Yes, it is.

1241
01:04:18,376 --> 01:04:20,421
Don't tell her
it's not her fault.

1242
01:04:20,465 --> 01:04:21,988
It is her fault.

1243
01:04:22,032 --> 01:04:24,599
At least you can leave here
in a couple of days, Molly.

1244
01:04:24,643 --> 01:04:26,427
I have to
live with this forever.

1245
01:04:31,128 --> 01:04:34,566
It's my fault.
Lawrence, it's all my fault.

1246
01:04:34,609 --> 01:04:37,699
Oh. No, no, no, no sweetie.

1247
01:04:37,743 --> 01:04:39,092
CLIFF: Hey, Dad, it's me.

1248
01:04:39,136 --> 01:04:40,572
Is everything okay?

1249
01:04:40,615 --> 01:04:42,791
I got a crazy message
from the Lachman's last night.

1250
01:04:42,835 --> 01:04:44,576
What are they talking
about a Mexican restaurant?

1251
01:04:44,619 --> 01:04:47,622
Well, son, a restaurant
is no place to spend a holiday.

1252
01:04:47,666 --> 01:04:50,408
I don't blame Molly a bit
for staying where she is.

1253
01:04:50,451 --> 01:04:51,931
Well, how is she, I mean,

1254
01:04:51,975 --> 01:04:53,672
was she excited
about the big news?

1255
01:04:53,715 --> 01:04:55,674
[CHUCKLES] You should've
seen her son.

1256
01:04:55,717 --> 01:04:58,546
Her eyes were shining
like molten steel.

1257
01:05:00,331 --> 01:05:01,636
Well listen, anyway,

1258
01:05:01,680 --> 01:05:03,551
wish all the kids
a happy Thanksgiving for me

1259
01:05:03,595 --> 01:05:04,944
and I'll see you tomorrow,
all right.

1260
01:05:04,988 --> 01:05:07,164
-Oh, and Dad.
-Speaking.

1261
01:05:07,207 --> 01:05:09,427
You sure you're not doing
anything questionable, right?

1262
01:05:09,470 --> 01:05:12,343
Cliff, just take it easy, relax.

1263
01:05:12,386 --> 01:05:14,301
Business has never been
so good.

1264
01:05:16,608 --> 01:05:19,002
Now then, you say that
you're in the market

1265
01:05:19,045 --> 01:05:20,133
to rent a teenager.

1266
01:05:56,996 --> 01:06:00,913
I don't think that she will
ever talk to me again.

1267
01:06:00,957 --> 01:06:02,915
You don't deserve
to have her talk to you again.

1268
01:06:04,612 --> 01:06:06,440
You're lucky
I'm still talking to you.

1269
01:06:07,964 --> 01:06:08,965
You're right.

1270
01:06:11,750 --> 01:06:13,970
No, you're right.

1271
01:06:15,841 --> 01:06:17,495
I am?

1272
01:06:17,538 --> 01:06:19,627
-About what?
-About having kids.

1273
01:06:20,977 --> 01:06:22,065
You were right.

1274
01:06:27,374 --> 01:06:29,507
We don't have
the sensibilities to be parents.

1275
01:06:29,550 --> 01:06:31,248
We don't have the time,
we don't have a clue

1276
01:06:31,291 --> 01:06:32,510
about what we're doing.

1277
01:06:32,553 --> 01:06:33,902
This is hard work.

1278
01:06:35,992 --> 01:06:38,124
What were we thinking about?

1279
01:06:40,170 --> 01:06:41,562
I don't know, Val.

1280
01:06:44,261 --> 01:06:47,220
Maybe it'll work out
for the best, though.

1281
01:06:47,264 --> 01:06:50,963
I mean you toss in
this whole financial mess.

1282
01:06:53,922 --> 01:06:55,228
At least the kids are,

1283
01:06:56,142 --> 01:06:57,578
you know, they're...

1284
01:06:57,622 --> 01:06:58,840
They're only rented?

1285
01:07:03,758 --> 01:07:05,325
They deserve better than us.

1286
01:07:17,685 --> 01:07:18,991
[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]

1287
01:07:19,600 --> 01:07:20,645
No stems.

1288
01:07:21,385 --> 01:07:23,213
-No stems.
-Yes.

1289
01:07:24,605 --> 01:07:27,217
Kyle, wanna join us in here
for a minute, please?

1290
01:07:30,437 --> 01:07:32,787
Atta boy.
Take a seat right there.

1291
01:07:32,831 --> 01:07:34,876
Good, good. All right, guys.

1292
01:07:34,920 --> 01:07:36,400
I want to go over
a few ground rules here

1293
01:07:36,443 --> 01:07:38,054
before the guests arrive, okay?

1294
01:07:38,097 --> 01:07:39,620
What guests?

1295
01:07:39,664 --> 01:07:42,014
You know, their friends.

1296
01:07:42,058 --> 01:07:43,972
Well, they're not
friends-friends.

1297
01:07:44,016 --> 01:07:46,105
They're more like
business client-friends.

1298
01:07:46,149 --> 01:07:47,976
But that's why it's very,
very important

1299
01:07:48,020 --> 01:07:50,109
that you guys
behave tonight, okay.

1300
01:07:50,153 --> 01:07:53,112
Business friends?
On Thanksgiving?

1301
01:07:53,156 --> 01:07:55,680
Rule number one,
no burping at the table.

1302
01:07:56,333 --> 01:07:58,291
Number two, Kyle,

1303
01:07:58,335 --> 01:08:01,468
no passing any food whatsoever
through your nose.

1304
01:08:01,512 --> 01:08:04,036
And number three,
and most importantly,

1305
01:08:04,080 --> 01:08:06,778
Mr. Twixel
stays in the bedroom.

1306
01:08:07,953 --> 01:08:09,085
Any questions?

1307
01:08:11,435 --> 01:08:12,784
Molly?

1308
01:08:12,827 --> 01:08:15,874
Thanksgiving is supposed to be
family time.

1309
01:08:15,917 --> 01:08:17,745
What's the difference?

1310
01:08:17,789 --> 01:08:19,225
We're not family either.

1311
01:08:20,531 --> 01:08:21,575
Brandon...

1312
01:08:23,490 --> 01:08:25,536
When are we going to leave?

1313
01:08:25,578 --> 01:08:26,971
In the morning.

1314
01:08:29,366 --> 01:08:30,889
Guys, I'll tell you what,

1315
01:08:33,196 --> 01:08:35,719
let's not talk
about leaving now, okay.

1316
01:08:35,763 --> 01:08:37,330
Let's talk about
what a great time

1317
01:08:37,374 --> 01:08:38,723
we're gonna have tonight.

1318
01:08:39,550 --> 01:08:40,594
Right?

1319
01:08:40,638 --> 01:08:41,943
-Right.
-Right.

1320
01:08:44,859 --> 01:08:46,165
[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]

1321
01:08:46,209 --> 01:08:48,471
Anyway, the post office says
they'd be able to

1322
01:08:48,514 --> 01:08:50,387
trace the Lincoln letter
in a couple of days,

1323
01:08:50,430 --> 01:08:51,779
but other than that

1324
01:08:51,823 --> 01:08:53,520
I think the auction
went pretty well, don't you?

1325
01:08:53,564 --> 01:08:56,306
Yes, very well received.
Thought it could have done

1326
01:08:56,349 --> 01:08:58,046
without the children
rushing around.

1327
01:08:58,960 --> 01:09:01,180
I didn't think they were so bad.

1328
01:09:01,224 --> 01:09:03,182
I imagine that you can't wait

1329
01:09:03,226 --> 01:09:06,228
to have your house returned
to normal again.

1330
01:09:06,272 --> 01:09:09,406
Well, it's actually kind of fun.

1331
01:09:10,537 --> 01:09:11,755
[WOMAN CHUCKLES]

1332
01:09:13,192 --> 01:09:15,193
What grade did you say
you were in?

1333
01:09:15,237 --> 01:09:18,631
Well, we don't really
have grades in prison.

1334
01:09:18,675 --> 01:09:20,112
[INDISTINCT CHATTER CONTINUES]

1335
01:09:21,505 --> 01:09:23,333
Will you and your brothers
be visiting long?

1336
01:09:23,376 --> 01:09:26,858
Uh-uh. The rental period
is for only ten days.

1337
01:09:29,861 --> 01:09:32,385
I can pass a Brussel sprout
through my nose.

1338
01:09:32,429 --> 01:09:35,258
I used to be able to pass
a full cheese sandwich.

1339
01:09:42,612 --> 01:09:43,613
[SIGHS DEEPLY]

1340
01:09:59,237 --> 01:10:00,934
This is really boring.

1341
01:10:00,978 --> 01:10:03,677
At least at the orphanage
we're part of a family,

1342
01:10:03,721 --> 01:10:04,983
not a business meeting.

1343
01:10:05,026 --> 01:10:06,332
[DOOR BELL RINGS]

1344
01:10:10,684 --> 01:10:14,166
Hey, happy Thanksgiving, guys.

1345
01:10:14,210 --> 01:10:16,429
Mmm, sure smells good in here.

1346
01:10:16,473 --> 01:10:17,691
Come on, eat with us.

1347
01:10:17,735 --> 01:10:20,564
Oh no, no, no, I, uh,
I really can't.

1348
01:10:20,607 --> 01:10:22,696
Why not?
There's plenty of food.

1349
01:10:22,740 --> 01:10:25,090
Can Larry come and eat with us?

1350
01:10:30,443 --> 01:10:33,359
Well, honey, I'm sure that
Lawrence has other plans.

1351
01:10:33,403 --> 01:10:35,100
I really do.

1352
01:10:35,143 --> 01:10:37,058
I was trying
to tell the kids that.

1353
01:10:37,102 --> 01:10:39,365
Got a bunch of family
coming over downstairs.

1354
01:10:39,409 --> 01:10:42,934
Lots of food, everybody
bringing dessert and what not.

1355
01:10:42,977 --> 01:10:45,066
Anyway, the reason I came up

1356
01:10:45,110 --> 01:10:47,634
is I found that
Abraham Lincoln letter,

1357
01:10:47,678 --> 01:10:49,245
sitting out by the box.

1358
01:10:50,768 --> 01:10:52,291
I guess Molly forgot a stamp,

1359
01:10:52,335 --> 01:10:54,772
so the mailman never took it.

1360
01:10:54,815 --> 01:10:58,210
Nuts! Now we won't
win the money.

1361
01:10:58,254 --> 01:11:01,387
[CLICKS TONGUE] Well,
I got to make room

1362
01:11:01,431 --> 01:11:03,259
for all those people
I was telling you about.

1363
01:11:04,041 --> 01:11:05,782
Can we come with you?

1364
01:11:06,610 --> 01:11:07,741
Can we?

1365
01:11:07,785 --> 01:11:09,221
Why would you want to do that?

1366
01:11:09,264 --> 01:11:11,832
Look at all that great food
waiting for you.

1367
01:11:11,876 --> 01:11:13,617
Who cares, it's just a turkey.

1368
01:11:13,660 --> 01:11:15,835
Come on, Larry, why not?

1369
01:11:18,448 --> 01:11:20,798
Um, Mr. and Mrs. Syracuse,

1370
01:11:20,841 --> 01:11:22,974
is it okay if the kids
come down with me for a while?

1371
01:11:23,017 --> 01:11:24,062
It's fine.

1372
01:11:25,063 --> 01:11:26,717
Thanks Lawrence, for coming by.

1373
01:11:31,678 --> 01:11:33,680
Race you to the elevators,
come on.

1374
01:11:42,385 --> 01:11:44,778
It seems to be undamaged.

1375
01:11:44,822 --> 01:11:46,040
I don't know, Russ.

1376
01:11:46,084 --> 01:11:47,781
Lincoln on one side,
Molly Ward on the other?

1377
01:11:47,825 --> 01:11:49,740
Wait, it's pencil.

1378
01:11:50,218 --> 01:11:51,655
It's pencil.

1379
01:11:51,698 --> 01:11:53,439
They have erasers for pencils.

1380
01:11:53,483 --> 01:11:55,920
We'll use one of those little
pencil erasers.

1381
01:11:55,963 --> 01:11:57,617
We'll erase it. [CHUCKLES]

1382
01:12:03,710 --> 01:12:05,712
[READING] I would like
to win the $2 million

1383
01:12:07,714 --> 01:12:11,327
so our new family will have
enough money to keep us.

1384
01:12:12,589 --> 01:12:13,677
Molly.

1385
01:12:18,072 --> 01:12:20,291
-Where are they?
-Did they go with Larry?

1386
01:12:20,335 --> 01:12:22,076
Yes, yes!

1387
01:12:22,120 --> 01:12:24,383
[GUESTS MUMBLING]

1388
01:12:26,254 --> 01:12:27,647
Hotel Savoy?

1389
01:12:28,474 --> 01:12:29,780
What about it?

1390
01:12:29,823 --> 01:12:32,391
Lincoln never stayed
at the Hotel Savoy.

1391
01:12:32,434 --> 01:12:34,262
His wife had
a personal vendetta

1392
01:12:34,306 --> 01:12:35,699
against the owner's wife.

1393
01:12:36,395 --> 01:12:37,657
This letter's a forgery.

1394
01:12:37,701 --> 01:12:39,746
[GUESTS SCOFF]

1395
01:12:39,790 --> 01:12:42,314
LARRY: [ON PHONE] That really
is too bad about the car.

1396
01:12:42,358 --> 01:12:45,491
Blew up sky high? Huh?

1397
01:12:45,535 --> 01:12:47,754
[EXHALES SHARPLY] Look,
what can you do.

1398
01:12:47,798 --> 01:12:50,583
We'll just try again
next year, right?

1399
01:12:51,148 --> 01:12:52,629
Okay, okay.

1400
01:12:52,672 --> 01:12:55,282
Then yeah, I'll... talk...

1401
01:12:57,023 --> 01:12:59,897
Talk to you guys,
I'll talk to you guys next week.

1402
01:12:59,940 --> 01:13:01,550
-[PHONE LINE DIES]
-Right, bye.

1403
01:13:02,334 --> 01:13:04,162
Looks like my, uh,

1404
01:13:04,205 --> 01:13:06,599
cousins aren't gonna
make it after all.

1405
01:13:06,643 --> 01:13:08,166
I'm sorry, Larry.

1406
01:13:08,209 --> 01:13:09,646
That's okay.

1407
01:13:11,082 --> 01:13:12,866
You sure you guys don't want
real plates?

1408
01:13:12,910 --> 01:13:16,653
Because sometimes the potatoes
get stuck in the corners.

1409
01:13:16,696 --> 01:13:18,089
BRANDON: No.
We're okay, Larry.

1410
01:13:18,132 --> 01:13:19,395
All right, then.

1411
01:13:21,005 --> 01:13:22,180
Oops.

1412
01:13:23,398 --> 01:13:24,922
BRANDON: What's wrong?

1413
01:13:24,965 --> 01:13:26,706
Forgot something.

1414
01:13:28,491 --> 01:13:30,449
Who likes cranberry sauce?

1415
01:13:30,493 --> 01:13:31,494
No stems?

1416
01:13:31,537 --> 01:13:33,059
Nope, not a stem in the can.

1417
01:13:35,106 --> 01:13:36,281
[KNOCK ON DOOR]

1418
01:13:46,465 --> 01:13:48,598
Um, may we come in?

1419
01:13:49,425 --> 01:13:50,556
Of course, you can.

1420
01:13:53,298 --> 01:13:55,518
-LARRY: Welcome.
-Thank you.

1421
01:13:55,561 --> 01:13:56,954
VALERIE: What are you guys
doing down here?

1422
01:13:56,996 --> 01:13:59,434
We've got, um,
we've got dessert upstairs.

1423
01:14:00,436 --> 01:14:03,003
And, uh, Larry,

1424
01:14:03,047 --> 01:14:05,136
you're more than welcome
to join us.

1425
01:14:06,180 --> 01:14:08,443
In fact, we insist.

1426
01:14:09,662 --> 01:14:11,490
No offence, but,

1427
01:14:11,534 --> 01:14:13,536
we don't want to eat
with those people.

1428
01:14:13,579 --> 01:14:15,625
We want to be with family.

1429
01:14:17,540 --> 01:14:19,498
Molly, I keep telling you...

1430
01:14:19,541 --> 01:14:22,327
No, it's okay, Larry.
Molly's right.

1431
01:14:22,370 --> 01:14:24,329
You have been
more like family than we have.

1432
01:14:25,591 --> 01:14:27,593
We just, um...

1433
01:14:27,637 --> 01:14:29,465
We can't seem
to get the hang of this.

1434
01:14:31,554 --> 01:14:33,556
I'm sorry. [CRIES]

1435
01:14:33,599 --> 01:14:34,600
[KISSES ON FOREHEAD]

1436
01:14:39,170 --> 01:14:40,780
You know,

1437
01:14:40,824 --> 01:14:43,478
it really is a whole lot
nicer down here.

1438
01:14:43,522 --> 01:14:44,741
[BOTH CHUCKLE]

1439
01:14:46,046 --> 01:14:47,831
May we join you?

1440
01:14:47,874 --> 01:14:49,180
Oh, sure.

1441
01:14:49,833 --> 01:14:51,008
I've got plenty.

1442
01:14:52,183 --> 01:14:54,011
Our cousins ran into
some car trouble.

1443
01:14:54,054 --> 01:14:55,142
MOLLY: Here you go.

1444
01:14:55,186 --> 01:14:56,404
RUSS: Car trouble?

1445
01:14:56,448 --> 01:14:58,145
LARRY: Crazy thing blew up.

1446
01:14:58,189 --> 01:14:59,538
-Blew right up?
-Yeah...

1447
01:14:59,582 --> 01:15:01,844
MOLLY: Everybody remember
to save some turkey

1448
01:15:01,888 --> 01:15:03,541
for Mr. Twixel.

1449
01:15:05,588 --> 01:15:06,806
[MR. TWIXEL BARKING]

1450
01:15:13,813 --> 01:15:14,945
[CONTINUES BARKING]

1451
01:15:18,601 --> 01:15:19,732
[MR. TWIXEL WHIMPERS]

1452
01:15:51,155 --> 01:15:53,070
[THUNDER RUMBLING]

1453
01:15:56,508 --> 01:15:59,032
Brandon, I'm very sorry
I didn't believe you

1454
01:15:59,076 --> 01:16:00,294
about the letter.

1455
01:16:00,904 --> 01:16:02,035
Why should you?

1456
01:16:02,079 --> 01:16:03,384
I'm just a big liar.

1457
01:16:03,428 --> 01:16:05,125
That's why no one
will adopt me, I know that.

1458
01:16:05,169 --> 01:16:06,910
No, that's not true.

1459
01:16:08,041 --> 01:16:10,000
All kids lie
every once in a while.

1460
01:16:10,043 --> 01:16:12,437
It's just part
of growing up.

1461
01:16:12,480 --> 01:16:16,180
I remember that
till I was about 16

1462
01:16:16,223 --> 01:16:18,356
I insisted
that I had X-ray vision.

1463
01:16:19,662 --> 01:16:20,924
Doesn't matter.

1464
01:16:20,967 --> 01:16:22,577
No one will be like my mom.

1465
01:16:23,535 --> 01:16:25,362
No, of course not.

1466
01:16:27,234 --> 01:16:29,106
Val comes pretty close.

1467
01:16:30,020 --> 01:16:31,237
Closer than anybody.

1468
01:16:32,109 --> 01:16:33,545
She even smells like my mom.

1469
01:16:41,205 --> 01:16:42,815
Let me tell you something,
Brandon.

1470
01:16:45,296 --> 01:16:47,820
If Val and I ever have a son,

1471
01:16:49,909 --> 01:16:51,258
I wouldn't mind one bit

1472
01:16:51,302 --> 01:16:52,956
if he turned out
to be just like you.

1473
01:17:01,007 --> 01:17:02,094
Goodnight, pal.

1474
01:17:04,445 --> 01:17:06,839
We must be the two
worst candidates

1475
01:17:06,883 --> 01:17:08,928
for parenthood
on the face of the Earth.

1476
01:17:10,538 --> 01:17:13,454
We yelled, we screamed,

1477
01:17:13,498 --> 01:17:15,021
we called them liars.

1478
01:17:16,457 --> 01:17:18,242
Did you at least
apologize to Brandon

1479
01:17:18,285 --> 01:17:21,724
about that stupid letter?

1480
01:17:21,767 --> 01:17:23,550
I don't think he cared
very much.

1481
01:17:24,683 --> 01:17:26,119
Can't say that I blame him.

1482
01:17:26,163 --> 01:17:29,601
[THUNDER CONTINUES RUMBLING]

1483
01:17:29,645 --> 01:17:32,996
You know, I'm surprised
they all haven't run away.

1484
01:17:34,737 --> 01:17:37,434
We really blew it, Russ.

1485
01:17:37,478 --> 01:17:39,175
[THUNDER CONTINUES RUMBLING]

1486
01:17:39,219 --> 01:17:40,307
[DOOR OPENS]

1487
01:17:42,005 --> 01:17:43,963
-Molly!
-Hey.

1488
01:17:44,007 --> 01:17:45,312
Oh.

1489
01:17:45,356 --> 01:17:47,793
-You okay? Huh?
-Hey.

1490
01:17:47,837 --> 01:17:49,099
Get over here.
Get in here, quick.

1491
01:17:49,142 --> 01:17:50,621
Hurry. Snuggle in here.

1492
01:17:50,666 --> 01:17:52,580
It's just thunder and lightning,
nothing scary.

1493
01:17:54,670 --> 01:17:56,454
What's wrong with Molly?

1494
01:17:56,496 --> 01:17:59,022
Well, I think
she's afraid of the thunder.

1495
01:17:59,718 --> 01:18:01,502
Oh, is that all?

1496
01:18:02,329 --> 01:18:03,809
[THUNDER RUMBLING]

1497
01:18:04,592 --> 01:18:05,898
[RUSS AND VALERIE CHUCKLE]

1498
01:18:06,986 --> 01:18:09,119
RUSS: That's all,
that's all it was.

1499
01:18:12,818 --> 01:18:14,472
The house next door
got hit by lightning.

1500
01:18:14,514 --> 01:18:15,821
It burned to the ground.

1501
01:18:16,952 --> 01:18:18,041
Not really.

1502
01:18:19,216 --> 01:18:21,087
I suppose
there's no extra room.

1503
01:18:21,827 --> 01:18:24,047
Hey, what do you say?

1504
01:18:24,090 --> 01:18:25,612
Any extra room for Brandon?

1505
01:18:26,353 --> 01:18:28,442
Yeah, come on in here.

1506
01:18:28,486 --> 01:18:30,270
Get in here,
scoot over, scoot over.

1507
01:18:30,314 --> 01:18:32,620
-[ALL CHUCKLE]
-Hurry, hurry,

1508
01:18:32,664 --> 01:18:34,013
before that lightning
comes again.

1509
01:18:34,057 --> 01:18:35,362
Stay in here, stay...

1510
01:18:35,406 --> 01:18:36,668
[THUNDER RUMBLING]
[RUSS EXCLAIMING]

1511
01:18:36,712 --> 01:18:38,017
I told you it was coming.

1512
01:18:38,583 --> 01:18:39,758
[DOG BARKING]

1513
01:18:46,809 --> 01:18:48,853
All right, all right,
just this once.

1514
01:18:48,898 --> 01:18:49,942
[DOG WHIMPERS]

1515
01:18:49,986 --> 01:18:51,857
[ALL CHUCKLING]

1516
01:18:52,597 --> 01:18:53,816
[BED CREAKS]

1517
01:19:11,311 --> 01:19:12,835
[HUMMING]

1518
01:19:15,272 --> 01:19:17,840
[CONTINUES HUMMING]

1519
01:19:17,883 --> 01:19:19,145
[CHUCKLES]

1520
01:19:22,409 --> 01:19:24,889
[CONTINUES HUMMING]

1521
01:19:31,984 --> 01:19:33,638
Hey, how you doing?

1522
01:19:33,681 --> 01:19:35,379
Have you seen
my father around?

1523
01:19:35,422 --> 01:19:37,076
Oh, it was terrific.

1524
01:19:37,120 --> 01:19:38,991
How was everything here?

1525
01:19:39,035 --> 01:19:41,559
Uh-huh. Okay, well,
go look, I'll hold.

1526
01:19:42,386 --> 01:19:44,040
[CONTINUES HUMMING]

1527
01:19:57,009 --> 01:19:58,794
-[DOOR BELL RINGS]
-RUSS: Coming.

1528
01:20:02,623 --> 01:20:04,843
-Morning, Mr. Syracuse.
-Hi, Harry.

1529
01:20:04,887 --> 01:20:06,540
Are the children ready
to be returned

1530
01:20:06,584 --> 01:20:08,629
in the condition in which
they were rented?

1531
01:20:08,673 --> 01:20:10,066
Will you cut that out, please?

1532
01:20:11,110 --> 01:20:13,286
Guys, Harry's here.

1533
01:20:13,330 --> 01:20:15,462
HARRY: Ah, there they are.

1534
01:20:15,505 --> 01:20:19,162
One, two, three,
everybody accounted for.

1535
01:20:19,205 --> 01:20:21,251
Oh, Brandon,
I got very good news for you.

1536
01:20:21,294 --> 01:20:24,514
A very nice young couple
has rented you
for the next two weeks.

1537
01:20:24,558 --> 01:20:26,734
Just me?
I'm going to be all alone?

1538
01:20:26,778 --> 01:20:28,606
No, no, of course not.

1539
01:20:28,648 --> 01:20:30,826
In fact, a very nice couple
has rented you
for the next two weeks.

1540
01:20:30,869 --> 01:20:34,003
Now, Mr. Syracuse, could you
just sign right down there.

1541
01:20:35,047 --> 01:20:36,701
Okay, well,

1542
01:20:36,744 --> 01:20:39,704
free to say our goodbyes now
and we'll move on?

1543
01:20:42,576 --> 01:20:44,056
Okay.

1544
01:20:46,450 --> 01:20:48,147
Bye, kids.

1545
01:20:48,191 --> 01:20:50,846
Hope you had a couple of
good times, at least.

1546
01:20:50,889 --> 01:20:53,239
Oh, they'll be talking
about this for days to come.

1547
01:20:53,282 --> 01:20:54,893
Okay, here we go.

1548
01:20:54,937 --> 01:20:56,852
Harry, could you just give us
a couple of minutes, please?

1549
01:21:00,812 --> 01:21:02,118
Molly,

1550
01:21:03,815 --> 01:21:06,862
I'm going to call up
Mrs. Lachman

1551
01:21:06,905 --> 01:21:09,952
and maybe the three of us
can all go out to lunch. Hmm?

1552
01:21:11,431 --> 01:21:13,216
Hey, Kyle,

1553
01:21:13,259 --> 01:21:15,827
you look for that Medical
Digest subscription in the mail

1554
01:21:15,871 --> 01:21:17,175
in a couple of weeks, okay.

1555
01:21:18,177 --> 01:21:20,092
Yeah? Okay.

1556
01:21:20,136 --> 01:21:22,268
[KYLE SNIFFLES]

1557
01:21:22,312 --> 01:21:24,749
And Brandon, you know,
if I get any more of those

1558
01:21:24,791 --> 01:21:27,404
Civil War books,
I'll send them right along, huh?

1559
01:21:29,101 --> 01:21:30,189
Bye.

1560
01:21:31,059 --> 01:21:32,191
Bye.

1561
01:21:33,062 --> 01:21:34,237
Goodbye.

1562
01:21:42,505 --> 01:21:43,768
[VALERIE SIGHS]

1563
01:21:46,989 --> 01:21:48,120
Okay.

1564
01:22:05,746 --> 01:22:06,965
-HARRY: Mr. Twixel,
-[DOG BARKS]

1565
01:22:07,009 --> 01:22:08,575
front and center,
come on, boy.

1566
01:22:09,750 --> 01:22:10,795
Come on.

1567
01:22:18,977 --> 01:22:20,065
Come on.

1568
01:22:23,590 --> 01:22:25,809
You come back and see us now
for all your rental needs.

1569
01:22:31,947 --> 01:22:32,991
[DOOR CLOSES]

1570
01:22:33,861 --> 01:22:35,733
RUSS: [SIGHS DEEPLY] Well...

1571
01:22:37,735 --> 01:22:38,910
That's that, huh.

1572
01:22:40,520 --> 01:22:42,174
That's that.

1573
01:22:42,218 --> 01:22:44,655
MOLLY: We're sure
gonna miss you, Larry.

1574
01:22:44,698 --> 01:22:46,352
In the future, I'm gonna
have to

1575
01:22:46,396 --> 01:22:48,180
schedule time
for these goodbyes.

1576
01:22:59,539 --> 01:23:00,671
CLIFF: So, you did it.

1577
01:23:00,714 --> 01:23:02,151
You really did it, huh?

1578
01:23:02,193 --> 01:23:03,934
You actually rented children.

1579
01:23:03,978 --> 01:23:05,415
Are you insane?

1580
01:23:05,458 --> 01:23:08,070
My boy, I don't think
I like the tone of your voice

1581
01:23:08,112 --> 01:23:09,809
and in answer to our question,

1582
01:23:09,853 --> 01:23:12,422
I'm as sane as molten steel.

1583
01:23:12,465 --> 01:23:14,598
Look Dad, we're talking
about human beings

1584
01:23:14,641 --> 01:23:17,166
-not some dumb animal.
-[DOG GROWLS]

1585
01:23:21,300 --> 01:23:22,823
Hey Twixel,

1586
01:23:22,867 --> 01:23:25,130
I think we're ahead
of our time.

1587
01:23:27,350 --> 01:23:28,525
At least we know now

1588
01:23:28,568 --> 01:23:30,135
what lousy parents
we would have made.

1589
01:23:30,962 --> 01:23:32,181
The worst.

1590
01:23:35,097 --> 01:23:36,228
[WATER DRIPPING]

1591
01:23:39,666 --> 01:23:42,234
You know, Val, those kids
deserve better than us.

1592
01:23:42,278 --> 01:23:44,148
I mean, you said it yourself.

1593
01:23:44,193 --> 01:23:46,282
-Way better than us.
-Way better.

1594
01:23:47,109 --> 01:23:48,240
And you know why?

1595
01:23:49,415 --> 01:23:52,940
Because, you know,
we're things people.

1596
01:23:54,377 --> 01:23:55,813
I don't want any kids, Russ.

1597
01:23:58,424 --> 01:23:59,643
I want those kids.

1598
01:23:59,686 --> 01:24:01,036
Me too.

1599
01:24:04,648 --> 01:24:06,344
-Thatta way.
-Thanks, Lawrence.

1600
01:24:06,389 --> 01:24:09,782
Wait! Don't go!

1601
01:24:09,827 --> 01:24:11,698
Mr. and Mrs. Syracuse, hi,
I'm Cliff Haber,

1602
01:24:11,742 --> 01:24:13,309
the director of the
Mid-Valley Children's home.

1603
01:24:13,352 --> 01:24:15,485
Please accept my deepest,
deepest apologies.

1604
01:24:15,528 --> 01:24:17,139
-We want to adopt them.
-All of them.

1605
01:24:17,182 --> 01:24:18,270
[RUSS AND VALERIE GASPING]

1606
01:24:18,314 --> 01:24:19,924
-CLIFF: All of them?
-RUSS: Yeah.

1607
01:24:19,967 --> 01:24:21,534
You, you, you, want to adopt
all of them?

1608
01:24:21,577 --> 01:24:23,536
Pay attention,
that's what the man said.

1609
01:24:23,580 --> 01:24:26,148
Although, technically speaking,
Mr. Syracuse,

1610
01:24:26,191 --> 01:24:28,933
you did clearly decline
the purchase option.

1611
01:24:29,847 --> 01:24:30,891
Look...

1612
01:24:32,154 --> 01:24:34,112
Look, Mr. Haber,

1613
01:24:34,156 --> 01:24:36,680
I know that these
Lachman people,

1614
01:24:36,723 --> 01:24:39,291
they're expecting Molly
and I know that

1615
01:24:39,335 --> 01:24:41,250
they bought her
this swing set and everything,

1616
01:24:41,293 --> 01:24:45,123
but, you have to understand,

1617
01:24:45,166 --> 01:24:46,864
somewhere over the last
ten days,

1618
01:24:48,126 --> 01:24:49,910
we fell in love
with these kids.

1619
01:24:50,868 --> 01:24:52,913
And we sort of,
became a family.

1620
01:24:52,957 --> 01:24:56,568
And Val and I,
would really like to try

1621
01:24:56,612 --> 01:24:58,309
and keep that together
if we can.

1622
01:25:00,007 --> 01:25:02,401
I mean, you know,
if they'll have us.

1623
01:25:04,925 --> 01:25:06,101
Will you have us?

1624
01:25:07,537 --> 01:25:09,103
Yeah?

1625
01:25:09,147 --> 01:25:10,888
-Yeah.
-[DOG BARKING]

1626
01:25:10,931 --> 01:25:12,150
It worked.

1627
01:25:14,413 --> 01:25:16,198
Don't break us apart,
Mr. Haber.

1628
01:25:17,634 --> 01:25:19,766
Okay, listen, I'll explain it
to the Lachman's

1629
01:25:19,809 --> 01:25:20,985
I'll bring back the paperwork.

1630
01:25:21,028 --> 01:25:22,378
In the meantime go be a family.

1631
01:25:22,421 --> 01:25:25,163
-Okay. Go, be a family.
-Thank you.

1632
01:25:25,207 --> 01:25:26,730
-Thank you.
-All right.

1633
01:25:26,773 --> 01:25:28,166
-Thank you, thank you.
-Okay.

1634
01:25:31,865 --> 01:25:33,998
Well, yes, I may have been

1635
01:25:34,041 --> 01:25:35,739
a little foot loose
and fancy free.

1636
01:25:35,782 --> 01:25:38,307
I may have zigged when
I should have zagged, you know.

1637
01:25:38,350 --> 01:25:39,743
But it was never six of one

1638
01:25:39,786 --> 01:25:41,179
or half a dozen of the other
with me.

1639
01:25:41,223 --> 01:25:42,833
When I went into this racket,

1640
01:25:42,876 --> 01:25:44,704
I went in
to get those kids a home

1641
01:25:44,748 --> 01:25:47,620
and by God, I did it.

1642
01:25:48,708 --> 01:25:49,753
[MR.TWIXEL BARKS]

1643
01:25:50,754 --> 01:25:51,842
What?

1644
01:26:03,245 --> 01:26:04,550
No.

1645
01:26:05,594 --> 01:26:07,031
Oh, no.

1646
01:26:07,074 --> 01:26:09,773
No! No! No!

1647
01:26:10,643 --> 01:26:11,644
Honey.

1648
01:26:14,343 --> 01:26:15,518
[ALL CHUCKLE]

1649
01:26:25,309 --> 01:26:27,182
MOLLY: Yay,
come on Mr. Twixel.

1650
01:26:28,226 --> 01:26:30,097
[MR. TWIXEL BARKING]

1651
01:26:30,141 --> 01:26:31,577
We'll meet you
at the elevators.

1652
01:26:34,101 --> 01:26:35,538
RUSS: Heel, boy.

1653
01:26:40,412 --> 01:26:42,849
Guess what, we're staying.

1654
01:26:42,893 --> 01:26:45,591
Three more for 2209,
got it.

1655
01:26:46,549 --> 01:26:48,072
See that?

1656
01:26:48,115 --> 01:26:50,291
Something nice happened
to nice people.

1657
01:26:54,034 --> 01:26:55,384
Come on, Brandon.

1658
01:27:07,874 --> 01:27:10,007
Well, I got to hand it
to you, Dad. I mean,

1659
01:27:10,050 --> 01:27:12,227
here for years I've been
trying to get these kids placed

1660
01:27:12,270 --> 01:27:14,228
and you make it happen
in a week.

1661
01:27:14,272 --> 01:27:15,882
Yeah, it's funny how life is.

1662
01:27:15,925 --> 01:27:18,407
Here, for years, you've been
trying to get these kids placed

1663
01:27:18,450 --> 01:27:20,059
and I make it happen
in a week.

1664
01:27:20,931 --> 01:27:22,148
You know, the truth is, son,

1665
01:27:22,193 --> 01:27:24,282
this magic of
making people happy,

1666
01:27:25,240 --> 01:27:26,502
it's a gift.

1667
01:27:27,633 --> 01:27:29,374
[BOTH CHUCKLE]

1668
01:27:47,218 --> 01:27:48,480
RUSS: Kyle, no!

1669
01:27:48,523 --> 01:27:51,004
Not the autographed 
Joe Namath football!