1
00:00:07,308 --> 00:00:09,308
IT'S A PERFECT NIGHT
FOR OBSERVING.

2
00:00:09,310 --> 00:00:11,877
IT'S WARM, DARK.
THE AIR IS CRYSTAL CLEAR.

3
00:00:11,879 --> 00:00:14,146
OKAY, THEY'RE IN BED.

4
00:00:19,487 --> 00:00:21,487
YOU KNOW,
I'M NOT SATISFIED

5
00:00:21,489 --> 00:00:24,823
WATCHING THE MULLERS FROM AFAR.
THIS ISN'T WHAT HUMANS DO.

6
00:00:24,825 --> 00:00:28,394
HUMANS DON'T JUST
OBSERVE EACH OTHER.
THEY INTERACT.

7
00:00:28,396 --> 00:00:31,530
- WE SHOULD MAKE
CONTACT WITH THEM.
- OHH!

8
00:00:31,532 --> 00:00:34,133
HERE'S SOMETHING
DIFFERENT.

9
00:00:35,903 --> 00:00:39,338
YOU KNOW,
WITHOUT THEIR CLOTHES,
THEY SEEM KIND OF...

10
00:00:39,340 --> 00:00:41,340
- GELATINOUS?
- YEAH.

11
00:00:42,809 --> 00:00:45,710
- WHAT IS HE LOOKING FOR?
- I'M NOT SURE YET.

12
00:00:47,248 --> 00:00:49,915
WAIT.  WAIT!
YES, THIS IS IT.

13
00:00:49,917 --> 00:00:51,917
I BELIEVE THEY'RE
GOING TO MATE.

14
00:00:51,919 --> 00:00:54,219
- Sally: AW!
- OHH!

15
00:00:54,221 --> 00:00:56,655
TOMMY, PAY ATTENTION.

16
00:00:56,657 --> 00:00:58,690
WHY?  THIS IS LIKE

17
00:00:58,692 --> 00:01:00,759
SWEATING TO THE OLDIES
WITHOUT MUSIC.

18
00:01:02,063 --> 00:01:04,063
THIS IS IMPORTANT.

19
00:01:04,065 --> 00:01:06,331
SEX IS HOW HUMANS ENRICH
THEIR RELATIONSHIPS

20
00:01:06,333 --> 00:01:08,733
AND REAFFIRM THE COMMITMENT
THEY'VE MADE TO EACH OTHER.

21
00:01:08,735 --> 00:01:11,770
- IT'S THE MOST SACRED,
INTIMATE PART--
- Sally: THEY'RE DONE.

22
00:01:13,441 --> 00:01:15,740
ALREADY?

23
00:01:15,742 --> 00:01:17,709
THANK YOU VERY MUCH!

24
00:01:19,012 --> 00:01:21,012
<i> ( 50's rock music playing )</i>

25
00:01:50,077 --> 00:01:53,778
-<i> ( indistinct TV chatter )</i>
- WHO IS THAT SMOLDERING BEAUTY

26
00:01:53,780 --> 00:01:56,648
WITH THE FIERY EYES?

27
00:01:56,650 --> 00:01:58,584
KATIE COURIC.

28
00:02:00,654 --> 00:02:03,155
KATIE COURIC.

29
00:02:03,157 --> 00:02:06,825
IT SOUNDS LIKE
SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL
STUCK IN YOUR THROAT.

30
00:02:07,894 --> 00:02:09,894
MRS. DUBCEK,

31
00:02:09,896 --> 00:02:11,763
I NEED TO GO NEXT DOOR
AND BECOME NEIGHBORLY.

32
00:02:11,765 --> 00:02:16,101
- WHAT DO YOU KNOW
ABOUT THE MULLERS?
- THEY'RE LOVELY, VERY NICE.

33
00:02:16,103 --> 00:02:18,737
OF COURSE,
I SHOULDN'T TALK.

34
00:02:18,739 --> 00:02:21,740
IT'S TRUE YOUR VOICE IS NOT
ONE OF YOUR BEST ASSETS,

35
00:02:21,742 --> 00:02:24,443
- BUT GO AHEAD.
- ALL RIGHT.

36
00:02:24,445 --> 00:02:26,678
THE MULLERS HAVE HAD
THEIR UPS AND DOWNS.

37
00:02:26,680 --> 00:02:30,048
I GUESS HER HUSBAND
HAD SOME PROBLEMS
IN THE BEDROOM AREA.

38
00:02:30,050 --> 00:02:31,950
WHICH AREA?
THE CLOSET?

39
00:02:31,952 --> 00:02:34,353
THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT
IT WAS AT FIRST, TOO,

40
00:02:34,355 --> 00:02:36,821
BUT IT TURNED OUT TO BE
A VITAMIN DEFICIENCY.

41
00:02:36,823 --> 00:02:40,492
VITAMIN DEFICIENCY?
MR. MULLER AND I
CAN TALK ABOUT THAT.

42
00:02:40,494 --> 00:02:42,761
NO, NO.  STICK
TO SPORTS OR CARS.

43
00:02:42,763 --> 00:02:46,031
CARS, YES.
THAT'S GREAT!

44
00:02:46,033 --> 00:02:47,966
I HAVE A CAR.

45
00:02:49,102 --> 00:02:52,504
OH, WHY AM I DOING
THIS TO MYSELF?

46
00:02:52,506 --> 00:02:55,807
SHE PROBABLY DOESN'T
EVEN KNOW I'M ALIVE.

47
00:02:57,110 --> 00:02:59,778
NO, SHE KNOWS.

48
00:03:14,995 --> 00:03:18,730
- HI THERE, NEIGHBOR.
YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT CARS?
- IS THIS YOUR CAR?

49
00:03:18,732 --> 00:03:21,667
YEAH.  I SEEM TO BE
HAVING SOME TROUBLE
WITH MY...

50
00:03:21,669 --> 00:03:23,868
SPARK NUTS.

51
00:03:26,073 --> 00:03:27,806
SOMETIMES WITH THESE
OLD ONES,

52
00:03:27,808 --> 00:03:29,808
YOU'RE BETTER JUST
TO CALL THE JUNK MAN
AND HAVE IT TOWED AWAY.

53
00:03:29,810 --> 00:03:32,477
NO, I COULDN'T DO THAT.
I LOVE THIS CAR.

54
00:03:32,479 --> 00:03:34,979
IT HAS A COMPARTMENT
JUST FOR GLOVES.

55
00:03:34,981 --> 00:03:37,115
- DICK SOLOMON.
- FRANK MULLER.

56
00:03:37,117 --> 00:03:38,383
HAVEN'T SEEN YOU
AROUND MUCH.

57
00:03:38,385 --> 00:03:41,019
I'VE SEEN A LOT OF YOU
AND YOUR WIFE.

58
00:03:44,558 --> 00:03:47,226
SHE SAYS YOU'RE
SOME BIG DEAL PROFESSOR
AT THE COLLEGE.

59
00:03:47,228 --> 00:03:49,728
HARDLY.  IT'S
QUANTUM ASTROPHYSICS.

60
00:03:49,730 --> 00:03:52,163
A DRUGGED MONKEY
COULD DO IT.

61
00:03:52,165 --> 00:03:55,234
- WHAT ABOUT YOU?
- I WORK THE LINE
AT THE BALL BEARING PLANT.

62
00:03:55,236 --> 00:03:57,236
- NO, THE CINCOR PLANT?
- YEAH.

63
00:03:57,238 --> 00:03:59,971
ARE YOU KIDDING?
I LOVE YOUR BEARINGS.

64
00:03:59,973 --> 00:04:02,941
WHAT DO YOU MAKE?
THRUST BEARINGS
OR LINEAR?

65
00:04:02,943 --> 00:04:05,009
ACTUALLY, I DO
JOURNAL BEARINGS.

66
00:04:05,011 --> 00:04:07,779
WOW!  IS THAT PLAIN
OR ROLLING CONTACT?

67
00:04:07,781 --> 00:04:10,382
ON A GOOD DAY, BOTH.

68
00:04:10,384 --> 00:04:12,517
MAN, THE STORIES
YOU MUST HAVE.

69
00:04:12,519 --> 00:04:14,786
A FEW, A FEW.

70
00:04:18,024 --> 00:04:21,126
- I THOUGHT YOU'D BE
MORE OF AN EGGHEAD.
- NO, ALL MEAT.

71
00:04:30,471 --> 00:04:33,171
- Woman:<i> FRANK!</i>
- THERE'S THE BOSS.

72
00:04:34,808 --> 00:04:37,643
WELL, I'LL SEE
YOU AROUND.

73
00:04:37,645 --> 00:04:39,678
OH, NO BIG DEAL,

74
00:04:39,680 --> 00:04:41,713
BUT YOUR CAR'S PARKED

75
00:04:41,715 --> 00:04:45,350
ABOUT EIGHT INCHES
OVER THE PROPERTY LINE.
COULD YOU WATCH THAT?

76
00:04:45,352 --> 00:04:47,952
I'LL GO YOU ONE BETTER.
I'LL STOP DOING IT.

77
00:04:47,954 --> 00:04:49,888
THANKS, FRIEND.

78
00:04:52,626 --> 00:04:54,559
"FRIEND."

79
00:05:00,100 --> 00:05:02,367
WATCHING TELEVISION
IS AMAZING.

80
00:05:02,369 --> 00:05:05,537
I HAVEN'T HAD A THOUGHT
IN MY HEAD FOR THREE HOURS.

81
00:05:05,539 --> 00:05:08,873
AND THAT'S JUST
THE TIP OF THE ICEBERG.

82
00:05:10,043 --> 00:05:12,977
- PSEUDOFAMILY.
- WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?

83
00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:14,979
I HAVE BEEN...

84
00:05:14,981 --> 00:05:16,981
IN FRANK MULLER'S GARAGE.

85
00:05:16,983 --> 00:05:19,451
WE BRAGGED, WE LAUGHED,
WE TINKERED.

86
00:05:19,453 --> 00:05:22,354
HE LET ME TOUCH
HIS STUFF.

87
00:05:22,356 --> 00:05:24,356
IT FEELS GOOD TO BE
AROUND FRANK.

88
00:05:24,358 --> 00:05:27,693
IT FILLS AN EMPTY SPACE
I'VE BEEN FEELING RIGHT HERE.

89
00:05:27,695 --> 00:05:29,695
I THINK IT'S
BECAUSE WE'RE FRIENDS.

90
00:05:29,697 --> 00:05:33,332
♪ SO NO ONE TOLD YOU
IT WAS GONNA BE THIS WAY. ♪

91
00:05:37,170 --> 00:05:39,904
- WHAT IS THIS?
- SHAKE 'N BAKE CHICKEN.
JUST EAT IT.

92
00:05:39,906 --> 00:05:43,274
NO, THIS ISN'T CHICKEN.
THIS IS JUST... FLAKES.

93
00:05:43,276 --> 00:05:46,812
- OKAY, STAY RIGHT THERE.
- SALLY, YOU MUST LEARN
TO COOK.

94
00:05:46,814 --> 00:05:49,981
HOW FAR DO YOU THINK
YOU'RE GOING TO GO
WITH JUST A FABULOUS BODY

95
00:05:49,983 --> 00:05:53,284
- AND THE INTELLECT OF A GENIUS?
- THE BOX HAD A PICTURE
OF A CHICKEN ON IT.

96
00:05:53,286 --> 00:05:56,688
I SHAKED IT, I BAKED IT.
WHAT ELSE AM I SUPPOSED
TO DO WITH IT?

97
00:05:56,690 --> 00:05:59,624
WHY DON'T YOU
ASK MRS. MULLER?
GET CLOSE TO HER.

98
00:05:59,626 --> 00:06:02,361
- DO I HAVE TO?
- YES.  THEY'RE PLUMP.
WE'RE EMACIATED.

99
00:06:02,363 --> 00:06:04,363
YOU DO THE MATH.

100
00:06:04,365 --> 00:06:06,531
MAKING A FRIEND
IS SO SIMPLE.

101
00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:09,167
YOU MAY NOT BE AS GOOD
AT IT AS I AM,

102
00:06:09,169 --> 00:06:11,870
- BUT I COMMAND YOU TO TRY.
- WHAT IS THE POINT?

103
00:06:11,872 --> 00:06:14,873
WE'RE NOT GOING
TO LEARN ABOUT HUMANS
BY WATCHING TELEVISION.

104
00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:17,308
WE HAVE TO MIX
OURSELVES AMONG THEM,

105
00:06:17,310 --> 00:06:20,245
WALK A MILE
IN THEIR PANTS.

106
00:06:20,247 --> 00:06:22,213
I JUST DON'T KNOW HOW
TO TALK TO WOMEN.

107
00:06:22,215 --> 00:06:24,449
I'M SURE YOU CAN FIND
SOMETHING TO SAY TO HER.

108
00:06:24,451 --> 00:06:27,619
YOU COULD WALK ON THE BEACH
AND DISCUSS ITCHING.

109
00:06:30,391 --> 00:06:32,391
OH, HOW EXCITING.

110
00:06:32,393 --> 00:06:34,726
I AM SO GLAD
I GET TO BE THE WOMAN.

111
00:06:34,728 --> 00:06:37,829
NEXT PLANET, I GET TO BE
SOMETHING BIG WITH HORNS.

112
00:06:39,332 --> 00:06:41,433
OKAY, SO
THE SHAKE 'N BAKE

113
00:06:41,435 --> 00:06:45,003
- IS JUST A COCOON
FOR THE CHICKEN.
- YEP.

114
00:06:45,005 --> 00:06:48,006
AND CHICLETS ARE NOT
CHICKEN AT ALL, RIGHT?

115
00:06:48,008 --> 00:06:51,175
- YOU'RE NOT FROM OHIO,
ARE YOU?
- NO.

116
00:06:51,177 --> 00:06:53,578
I CAN TELL.

117
00:06:53,580 --> 00:06:56,948
I DON'T ENVY YOU HAVING
TO TAKE CARE OF<i> THREE</i> MEN.

118
00:06:56,950 --> 00:07:00,018
I ONLY GOT FRANK,
AND HE'S A FULL-TIME JOB.

119
00:07:00,020 --> 00:07:03,455
JUST ONCE I'D LIKE TO SEE
THAT MAN PICK UP A SOCK.

120
00:07:03,457 --> 00:07:06,558
I'D LIKE TO SEE MEN
PUT THEIR DIRTY DISHES
IN THE SINK.

121
00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:08,560
I'D LIKE TO SEE THEM
DO LAUNDRY.

122
00:07:08,562 --> 00:07:11,229
I'D LIKE TO SEE THEM CRAMMED
BETWEEN TWO STEEL WHEELS

123
00:07:11,231 --> 00:07:13,197
AND GROUND
INTO A FINE PASTE.

124
00:07:16,036 --> 00:07:19,070
YOU KNOW, I'D LIKE
TO SEE THAT MYSELF.

125
00:07:19,072 --> 00:07:21,105
YOU LET ME KNOW.

126
00:07:21,107 --> 00:07:24,242
( laughs )

127
00:07:24,244 --> 00:07:27,278
- OH, YOU'RE DANGEROUS.
- OH, YES, I AM.

128
00:07:28,982 --> 00:07:32,383
I LIKE YOU.
YOU CAN COME BY ANYTIME.

129
00:07:32,385 --> 00:07:34,619
I WILL.

130
00:07:34,621 --> 00:07:36,621
BUT DO ME A FAVOR,

131
00:07:36,623 --> 00:07:39,558
BEFORE YOU SETTLE DOWN
AND GET MARRIED,
YOU HAVE SOME FUN.

132
00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:42,727
IF I HAD YOUR FIGURE,
I'D FIND SOME OLD
MILLIONAIRE IN FLORIDA

133
00:07:42,729 --> 00:07:45,096
AND SLOWLY SUCK
THE LIFE OUT OF HIM.

134
00:07:47,801 --> 00:07:50,502
I HAVE THE VERY
EQUIPMENT TO DO THAT.

135
00:07:51,839 --> 00:07:53,805
I'M SURE YOU DO.

136
00:07:55,843 --> 00:07:57,843
- HI, NEIGHBOR.
- HEY, HOW'RE YOU DOIN'?

137
00:07:57,845 --> 00:08:00,512
HARRY, TOMMY, THIS
IS FRANK, MY FRIEND.

138
00:08:00,514 --> 00:08:03,014
- YEAH, HI.
- IS THIS PLACE MAGNIFICENT?

139
00:08:03,016 --> 00:08:05,750
IT'S THE GARAGE MAHAL.

140
00:08:07,888 --> 00:08:11,155
YOU GOTTA HAVE
SOMEPLACE TO GET AWAY
FROM THE CLUCKING.

141
00:08:13,026 --> 00:08:15,026
<i> ( whistle blows on TV )</i>

142
00:08:15,028 --> 00:08:17,061
OOH, COLOR.

143
00:08:17,063 --> 00:08:19,531
60 CHANNELS OF IT.

144
00:08:19,533 --> 00:08:21,533
KNOCK YOURSELF OUT.

145
00:08:21,535 --> 00:08:24,002
- UH-HUH, UH-HUH...
-<i> ( channels changing )</i>

146
00:08:24,004 --> 00:08:27,606
DICK, LOOK.
DEBBIE SAYS THAT
THE NEW PROMAX ROUTER

147
00:08:27,608 --> 00:08:29,875
CAN HANDLE EVEN
THE WILDEST CURVES.

148
00:08:29,877 --> 00:08:31,877
I DON'T KNOW
IF DEBBIE REALIZES

149
00:08:31,879 --> 00:08:33,912
THAT CAN BE TAKEN
TWO WAYS.

150
00:08:35,048 --> 00:08:37,148
FRANK, THIS IS NEW.
WHAT IS IT?

151
00:08:37,150 --> 00:08:39,183
- A BACK SCRATCHER.
- MAY I?

152
00:08:39,185 --> 00:08:41,185
BE MY GUEST.

153
00:08:41,187 --> 00:08:44,188
OH!  OH, THIS
IS HEAVENLY.

154
00:08:44,190 --> 00:08:46,224
THAT SPOT HAS BEEN
DRIVING ME NUTS

155
00:08:46,226 --> 00:08:48,226
EVER SINCE
WE LANDED.  OH!

156
00:08:48,228 --> 00:08:51,496
PLEASE, KEEP IT.

157
00:08:51,498 --> 00:08:53,498
REALLY?

158
00:08:53,500 --> 00:08:55,500
I'VE NEVER RECEIVED
A GIFT BEFORE.

159
00:08:55,502 --> 00:08:57,569
I HAVE TO GIVE
YOU SOMETHING.
TAKE TOMMY.

160
00:08:59,406 --> 00:09:02,473
- Mrs. Muller:<i> FRANK!</i>
- THAT'S THE BOSS CALLING.

161
00:09:02,475 --> 00:09:04,576
YOU KNOW, IT'S FASCINATING,
EVERY TIME HIS WIFE CALLS,

162
00:09:04,578 --> 00:09:06,310
HE JUMPS.

163
00:09:06,312 --> 00:09:09,247
- SEE YOU AROUND.
- YOU CAN COUNT ON IT.
I LIKE YOU, FRANK.

164
00:09:09,249 --> 00:09:11,650
AFTER ALL THE TIME
I'VE SPENT AT THE UNIVERSITY,

165
00:09:11,652 --> 00:09:15,086
IT'S REFRESHING TO MEET
SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T
PRETEND TO BE SMART.

166
00:09:26,199 --> 00:09:28,533
<i> ( orchestral theme music</i>
<i> playing on TV )</i>

167
00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:34,172
"JERRY DATES A BLIND
GIRL.  REPEAT."

168
00:09:34,174 --> 00:09:37,241
JERRY DATES
A BLIND GIRL.

169
00:09:37,243 --> 00:09:40,111
YOU KNOW, IT GAINS NOTHING
THE SECOND TIME.

170
00:09:40,113 --> 00:09:43,281
Man on TV:
<i> This has been a rebroadcast</i>
<i> of the 11 o'clock news.</i>

171
00:09:43,283 --> 00:09:46,217
<i> We will resume</i>
<i> programming at 6:00 a.m.</i>

172
00:09:46,219 --> 00:09:48,152
<i> ( static )</i>

173
00:09:49,289 --> 00:09:51,456
IT'S THE SNOW SHOW.

174
00:09:53,093 --> 00:09:55,126
I SAW THIS ONE
LAST NIGHT.

175
00:09:57,363 --> 00:09:59,363
SO WHAT DO WE DO NOW?

176
00:09:59,365 --> 00:10:01,099
WHY DON'T WE GO VISIT
OUR FRIENDS, THE MULLERS?

177
00:10:01,101 --> 00:10:02,867
- Harry: LETS.
- GREAT!  WILL THEY BE HOME?

178
00:10:02,869 --> 00:10:05,737
IT'S 3:00 IN THE MORNING.
WHERE ELSE WOULD THEY BE?

179
00:10:07,040 --> 00:10:09,207
( knocking )

180
00:10:13,546 --> 00:10:15,546
- HI, NEIGHBOR.
- WH-WHAT'S THE MATTER?

181
00:10:15,548 --> 00:10:17,548
- NOTHING.
- IT'S 3:00
IN THE MORNING.

182
00:10:17,550 --> 00:10:19,183
PATTY SAID I COULD
DROP BY ANYTIME.

183
00:10:19,185 --> 00:10:21,953
DON'T WORRY,
WE BROUGHT GIFTS.

184
00:10:21,955 --> 00:10:24,388
A FLANK STEAK
FOR MILADY

185
00:10:24,390 --> 00:10:27,058
AND "THE TV GUIDE
CROSSWORD" FOR MONSIEUR.

186
00:10:27,060 --> 00:10:30,394
AND BY THE WAY,
THE ANSWER TO
"I BLANK LUCY"

187
00:10:30,396 --> 00:10:32,396
ISN'T WHAT YOU THINK.

188
00:10:32,398 --> 00:10:35,767
- WHO IS THIS?
- THAT'S MY DAUGHTER CINDY.
SHE'S IN COLLEGE.

189
00:10:35,769 --> 00:10:38,169
MY COMPLIMENTS.
SHE'S A DEFINITE TRIUMPH

190
00:10:38,171 --> 00:10:40,171
OF AEROBICS
OVER GENETICS.

191
00:10:42,609 --> 00:10:44,943
I THINK SOMEONE WOULD
LIKE TO SEE HER NAKED.

192
00:10:46,579 --> 00:10:49,648
SO, LET'S FIRE UP
THE BARBECUE.

193
00:10:49,650 --> 00:10:52,416
Mrs. Muller:
<i> FRANK, IF YOU'RE</i>
<i> IN DANGER, SHOUT!</i>

194
00:10:52,418 --> 00:10:55,687
- GO BACK TO SLEEP!
- YOU SEEM UPSET, FRANK.

195
00:10:55,689 --> 00:10:57,689
- GO HOME.
- WHY?

196
00:10:57,691 --> 00:11:00,091
- MAYBE THEY WANT
TO HAVE SEX.
- AGAIN?

197
00:11:00,093 --> 00:11:02,593
- EXCUSE ME?
- IT'S NOT WHAT
YOU'RE THINKING.

198
00:11:02,595 --> 00:11:05,263
IT'S JUST THAT WE'RE
SO FASCINATED BY YOU.

199
00:11:05,265 --> 00:11:07,666
WE'VE NEVER MET
ANYONE OF YOUR
ECONOMIC CLASS BEFORE.

200
00:11:07,668 --> 00:11:09,500
MY CLASS?

201
00:11:09,502 --> 00:11:11,670
LIKE YOU'RE SO MUCH
BETTER THAN WE ARE?

202
00:11:11,672 --> 00:11:13,938
WELL, YES,
BUT YOU'LL EVOLVE.

203
00:11:13,940 --> 00:11:16,207
AND UNTIL THEN,
WE CAN STILL BE FRIENDS.

204
00:11:16,209 --> 00:11:19,410
FRIENDS?!
YOU ARE NOT MY FRIEND.

205
00:11:19,412 --> 00:11:21,980
( stammers )
WE'RE BEST FRIENDS.

206
00:11:21,982 --> 00:11:24,716
NO, WE'RE NOT!
GET THE HELL OUTTA HERE!

207
00:11:24,718 --> 00:11:27,285
( whimpers )

208
00:11:27,287 --> 00:11:28,853
AND ANOTHER THING:

209
00:11:28,855 --> 00:11:32,456
GET YOUR PRECIOUS CAR
OFF MY PROPERTY!

210
00:11:32,458 --> 00:11:35,060
FINE!  WE CAN TELL
WHEN WE'RE NOT WANTED.

211
00:11:40,067 --> 00:11:42,000
- WE'RE NOT WANTED.
- Harry: OH!

212
00:11:49,710 --> 00:11:52,077
IT SEEMS THAT
SOME OF THE...

213
00:11:52,079 --> 00:11:54,312
SUBTLER PRINCIPLES
OF ELECTRON MOTION

214
00:11:54,314 --> 00:11:56,715
WERE BEYOND
EVERYONE'S GRASP.

215
00:11:56,717 --> 00:11:59,550
- ( class groans )
- BE THANKFUL IT'S JUST A GRADE.

216
00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:01,552
IN MOST PLACES,
THIS KIND OF PERFORMANCE

217
00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:03,554
GETS YOU A SPANKING
THAT STILL BURNS

218
00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:05,857
WHEN YOU'RE
BLOWN OUT THE AIRLOCK.

219
00:12:05,859 --> 00:12:09,127
DR. SOLOMON, ARE YOU
AT LEAST GOING TO
GRADE US ON A CURVE?

220
00:12:09,129 --> 00:12:11,662
OF COURSE NOT--
I GRADE ON A TRANSIENT LOOP.

221
00:12:15,902 --> 00:12:18,737
- WHAT?
- IT'S VERY SIMPLE.

222
00:12:18,739 --> 00:12:21,840
YOUR EXPECTED SCORE
IS LOCATED HERE,

223
00:12:21,842 --> 00:12:24,843
THE PARAMETERS
OF YOUR ACTUAL PERFORMANCE
ARE HERE, HERE AND HERE,

224
00:12:24,845 --> 00:12:27,746
DRIVING THE EXPECTATION
VERSUS PERFORMANCE DATA

225
00:12:27,748 --> 00:12:30,915
INTO THE LAST THREE LOOPS,
TWO OF WHICH CAN'T BE SEEN

226
00:12:30,917 --> 00:12:33,684
BECAUSE, OF COURSE,
THEY'RE FACTORED
ONLY IN TIME.

227
00:12:39,259 --> 00:12:41,325
SO IS MY "A"
STILL AN "A"?

228
00:12:41,327 --> 00:12:43,494
OH, CARYN.

229
00:12:44,564 --> 00:12:46,064
NO.

230
00:12:47,734 --> 00:12:49,868
THIS SHOULDN'T BE ALL
THAT DIFFICULT FOR YOU.

231
00:12:49,870 --> 00:12:51,870
THE INTERACTIONS
OF ELEMENTARY PARTICLES

232
00:12:51,872 --> 00:12:54,873
ARE FAR SIMPLER
THAN THE INTERACTIONS
BETWEEN PEOPLE.

233
00:12:54,875 --> 00:12:57,308
( sighs )
FOR EXAMPLE-- LEON,

234
00:12:57,310 --> 00:12:59,978
DO YOU HAVE ANY FRIENDS
IN THIS CLASS?

235
00:12:59,980 --> 00:13:02,147
WELL, SOMETIMES
I TALK TO CARYN.

236
00:13:02,149 --> 00:13:04,783
- SO CARYN IS
YOUR FRIEND?
- YES.

237
00:13:08,822 --> 00:13:11,122
I SEE.
PITMAN, YOU AND BUG
ARE FRIENDS, RIGHT?

238
00:13:11,124 --> 00:13:12,723
YEAH, SINCE THIRD GRADE.

239
00:13:12,725 --> 00:13:16,527
WE USED TO TRADE
UNDERWEAR ON SLEEPOVERS.

240
00:13:16,529 --> 00:13:18,696
SHUT UP.

241
00:13:18,698 --> 00:13:21,266
AND THIS FRIENDSHIP
WEATHERS ALL CIRCUMSTANCE,

242
00:13:21,268 --> 00:13:24,402
SURVIVES THE FRICTIONS
OF DAILY LIFE
COMPLETELY INTACT?

243
00:13:24,404 --> 00:13:25,770
- ABSOLUTELY.
- YEAH, TOTALLY.

244
00:13:25,772 --> 00:13:27,405
EVEN THOUGH
HE THINKS YOU'RE STUPID?

245
00:13:27,407 --> 00:13:28,639
YOU THINK I'M STUPID?

246
00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:30,474
ONLY IN A GOOD WAY.

247
00:13:30,476 --> 00:13:32,743
SO THERE YOU HAVE IT--
FRIENDSHIP,

248
00:13:32,745 --> 00:13:35,313
OBVIOUSLY JUST
A BIG WASTE OF TIME.

249
00:13:35,315 --> 00:13:37,315
AND YET EVERYONE
ON THE PLANET

250
00:13:37,317 --> 00:13:40,318
GETS ALL WORKED UP
ABOUT THESE POINTLESS
LITTLE BEHAVIORS,

251
00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:43,154
BLISSFULLY UNAWARE
OF THE GREAT
VAPORIZING METEOR

252
00:13:43,156 --> 00:13:45,089
DUE IN 2015...

253
00:13:47,194 --> 00:13:50,128
WHICH OBVIOUSLY DOESN'T
EXIST BECAUSE I'M KIDDING.

254
00:13:57,170 --> 00:13:59,237
PATTY, THANKS FOR
LETTING HARRY COME ALONG.

255
00:13:59,239 --> 00:14:02,040
HE'S A LITTLE TRAUMATIZED
BY ALL THE TENSION AT HOME.

256
00:14:02,042 --> 00:14:04,209
WHEE!

257
00:14:05,778 --> 00:14:07,778
SO DOES FRANK KNOW
YOU'RE WITH ME?

258
00:14:07,780 --> 00:14:09,714
NO, I TOLD HIM
I WAS SETTING A PERM.

259
00:14:09,716 --> 00:14:11,549
DOES DICK KNOW
YOU'RE WITH ME?

260
00:14:11,551 --> 00:14:13,551
NO, I INJECTED HIM
WITH A SEDATIVE.

261
00:14:13,553 --> 00:14:15,086
I'VE GOT AT LEAST
TWO MORE HOURS.

262
00:14:16,156 --> 00:14:17,788
OOH,
LIKE "THELMA & LOUISE,"

263
00:14:17,790 --> 00:14:21,159
EXCEPT WE JUST CAME
TO THE SUPERMARKET AND
WE HAVEN'T MURDERED ANYONE.

264
00:14:21,161 --> 00:14:23,995
IT'S EARLY YET.

265
00:14:23,997 --> 00:14:27,065
THEY'RE SO STUBBORN.
WHY DO MEN HAVE
TO BE THAT WAY?

266
00:14:27,067 --> 00:14:29,467
I'M STILL TRYING TO FIGURE
OUT THEIR FASCINATION WITH

267
00:14:29,469 --> 00:14:31,569
BURPING THE ALPHABET.

268
00:14:31,571 --> 00:14:34,505
NOW, THE KEY TO TOMATOES
IS YOU GOTTA SQUEEZE 'EM.

269
00:14:34,507 --> 00:14:36,607
IF THEY'RE SOFT,
THEY'RE READY.

270
00:14:39,846 --> 00:14:41,880
THIS ONE'S READY.

271
00:14:41,882 --> 00:14:45,884
I'M THE HIGH COMMANDER!

272
00:14:49,222 --> 00:14:52,323
- President Clinton:<i> When our</i>
<i>  interests are challenged...</i>
- WHAT ARE YOU WATCHING NOW?

273
00:14:52,325 --> 00:14:55,760
IT'S THE PRESIDENT
CLINTON SHOW.

274
00:14:55,762 --> 00:14:57,762
HE LOOKS GOOD ON CAMERA,

275
00:14:57,764 --> 00:15:00,231
BUT HIS SHOW
IS INCREDIBLY DULL.

276
00:15:00,233 --> 00:15:03,067
- DICK, ARE YOU
ALL RIGHT?
- I'M FINE.

277
00:15:03,069 --> 00:15:05,236
- NO, YOU'RE NOT.
- YES, I AM.

278
00:15:05,238 --> 00:15:07,772
OKAY, BUT YOUR BACK
IS STARTING TO BLEED.

279
00:15:09,675 --> 00:15:12,410
I WISH I HAD A REMOTE.
FRANK HAD A REMOTE.

280
00:15:12,412 --> 00:15:15,546
IF YOU LIKE FRANK SO MUCH,
WHY DON'T YOU GO LIVE
AT FRANK'S HOUSE?

281
00:15:15,548 --> 00:15:18,216
SIT DOWN.

282
00:15:18,218 --> 00:15:19,817
WHAT IS
YOUR BIG PROBLEM?

283
00:15:19,819 --> 00:15:21,519
NOTHING.  I JUST
REACHED OUT TO FRANK,

284
00:15:21,521 --> 00:15:23,221
AND HE KICKED ME
IN THE TEETH

285
00:15:23,223 --> 00:15:25,356
BECAUSE FRANK HATES ME
FOR NO GOOD REASON.

286
00:15:25,358 --> 00:15:28,793
- BUT, HEY, THAT'S FRANK.
- HUMANS ARE NOT PERFECT.

287
00:15:28,795 --> 00:15:31,629
WELL, THAT'S A CONVENIENT
EXCUSE, ISN'T IT?

288
00:15:31,631 --> 00:15:34,732
- YOU JUST CAN'T ADMIT
WHEN YOU'RE WRONG.
- OH, PLEASE.

289
00:15:34,734 --> 00:15:37,802
IT'S NOT LIKE
I'VE NEVER BONDED WITH
A LIFE-FORM, LIEUTENANT.

290
00:15:37,804 --> 00:15:39,971
YES, YES, WE KNOW.
YOU'VE BONDED BEAUTIFULLY

291
00:15:39,973 --> 00:15:42,407
WITH CREATURES
ON NINE DIFFERENT SYSTEMS.

292
00:15:42,409 --> 00:15:45,243
AND THOSE THAT
WOULDN'T BOND WE ATE.

293
00:15:46,779 --> 00:15:48,913
IT'S DIFFERENT HERE, DICK.
TO BOND WITH A HUMAN,

294
00:15:48,915 --> 00:15:51,482
YOU HAVE TO GIVE AND TAKE,
LIKE ME AND PATTY.

295
00:15:51,484 --> 00:15:53,484
IT'S NOT WORTH
THE TROUBLE.

296
00:15:53,486 --> 00:15:55,553
I CAN BE PERFECTLY CONTENT
AS A DISAFFECTED LONER.

297
00:15:55,555 --> 00:15:57,621
<i> ( ratchet clicking )</i>

298
00:15:57,623 --> 00:15:58,889
WAS THAT YOU?

299
00:15:58,891 --> 00:16:01,592
NO.  AND I
ALWAYS TELL YOU.

300
00:16:04,564 --> 00:16:07,231
SOMEONE'S TOWING AWAY
THE RAMBLER.

301
00:16:07,233 --> 00:16:09,733
IT'S MULLER!

302
00:16:09,735 --> 00:16:11,735
Sally:
WHY IS HE
TAKING THE CAR?

303
00:16:11,737 --> 00:16:13,737
<i> ( car engine humming )</i>

304
00:16:13,739 --> 00:16:15,739
BECAUSE HE KNOWS
I LOVE IT.

305
00:16:15,741 --> 00:16:17,741
Frank:
<i> I TOLD YOU, SOLOMON--</i>

306
00:16:17,743 --> 00:16:21,346
<i> EIGHT INCHES</i>
<i> OVER MY PROPERTY! </i> HA!

307
00:16:22,648 --> 00:16:24,415
- DICK, WHAT'S WRONG?
- I DON'T KNOW.

308
00:16:24,417 --> 00:16:26,451
THERE'S AN ODD SENSATION
MOVING THROUGH MY BODY.

309
00:16:26,453 --> 00:16:28,586
<i> ( Dick groaning )</i>

310
00:16:28,588 --> 00:16:31,689
( screaming )
WHO THE HELL DOES
THAT STUPID SACK OF FAT

311
00:16:31,691 --> 00:16:33,657
THINK HE IS ANYWAY?!

312
00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:37,795
- DICK?
- I HAVE A PLAN.

313
00:16:37,797 --> 00:16:40,598
REMEMBER, WE'RE NOT ALLOWED
TO LIQUEFY HUMANS.

314
00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:44,802
OKAY, I HAVE
ANOTHER PLAN.

315
00:16:44,804 --> 00:16:48,039
THAT'S IT.
I'M INVOKING
A SUPREME DIRECTIVE.

316
00:16:48,041 --> 00:16:50,875
- I'LL NEED WITNESSES.
- ( Dick groans )

317
00:16:50,877 --> 00:16:53,844
- WHAT IS IT?
- I WANT YOU TO REMEMBER
WHO YOU ARE.

318
00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:56,780
- I'M THE HIGH COMMANDER.
- AND WHAT IS THE HIGH
COMMANDER'S OATH?

319
00:16:58,618 --> 00:17:01,719
AS HIGH COMMANDER,
I VOW TO HANDLE
ALL PROBLEMS

320
00:17:01,721 --> 00:17:03,821
WITH STRENGTH
AND DELIBERATION.

321
00:17:03,823 --> 00:17:06,657
I WILL STRIVE
TO UNDERSTAND
OTHER LIFE-FORMS.

322
00:17:06,659 --> 00:17:08,993
I WILL AVOID AGGRESSION

323
00:17:08,995 --> 00:17:11,962
AND MAKE PEACE WITH
ALL THOSE WHO PISS ME OFF.

324
00:17:17,404 --> 00:17:19,570
- WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
- Tommy: DICK.

325
00:17:19,572 --> 00:17:21,572
WE'VE COME TO APOLOGIZE
AND MAKE A PEACE OFFERING.

326
00:17:21,574 --> 00:17:25,076
SO THE GREAT PROFESSOR
OFFERS THE LOWLY CHUMP
A PRESENT

327
00:17:25,078 --> 00:17:28,913
- AND MAKES IT BETTER.
- THAT'S WHAT WE'RE HOPING.

328
00:17:28,915 --> 00:17:30,981
IT'S A DOUBLE-SLEEVED
ROLLER BEARING.

329
00:17:30,983 --> 00:17:33,717
LOOK, YOU CAN TALK
DOWN TO ME,

330
00:17:33,719 --> 00:17:36,020
YOU CAN WAKE ME UP
AT 3:00 IN THE MORNING,

331
00:17:36,022 --> 00:17:38,022
BUT YOU CAN'T BUY ME OFF.

332
00:17:38,024 --> 00:17:40,324
- IT'S CAMBERED.
- GET OUT!

333
00:17:40,326 --> 00:17:42,726
AREN'T YOU
LISTENING, CHUNKY?
HE'S APOLOGIZING.

334
00:17:42,728 --> 00:17:46,064
NOW, NOW, NOW--
WE ARE NOT GOING TO
SINK DOWN TO HIS LEVEL.

335
00:17:46,066 --> 00:17:48,066
MY LEVEL?

336
00:17:48,068 --> 00:17:50,368
YOU PEOPLE ALWAYS GO
STRAIGHT TO THE SNOB STUFF.

337
00:17:50,370 --> 00:17:53,504
WHO ARE YOU CALLING "PEOPLE"?
YOU WANT A PIECE OF ME, HUH?

338
00:17:53,506 --> 00:17:56,374
YOU WANT A PIECE, HUH?

339
00:17:56,376 --> 00:17:58,609
- ( indistinct
whispering )
- OH.

340
00:17:58,611 --> 00:18:01,179
YOU WANT TO FIGHT?
COME ON!  COME ON!

341
00:18:01,181 --> 00:18:03,581
- THAT'S ENOUGH.
- GET YOUR HANDS
OFF OF ME.

342
00:18:03,583 --> 00:18:07,017
- SORRY.
- I-DON'T-LIKE IT!

343
00:18:07,019 --> 00:18:09,454
- PLEASE DON'T DO THAT.
- OH, YEAH, WHAT ARE YOU
GONNA DO ABOUT IT?

344
00:18:09,456 --> 00:18:13,124
HUH?  HUH?  HUH?
EGGHEAD!  BRAINIAC!

345
00:18:15,095 --> 00:18:17,528
DICK, I AM
SO DISAPPOINTED
IN YOU.

346
00:18:17,530 --> 00:18:19,663
I DON'T KNOW
WHAT HAPPENED.
I JUST LOST CONTROL.

347
00:18:19,665 --> 00:18:22,933
- YEAH, WELL, YOU HURT A HUMAN.
- WE ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE.
WHAT IF HE TALKS?

348
00:18:22,935 --> 00:18:26,070
- HE WON'T IF WE
FINISH HIM OFF.
- THIS IS AWFUL!

349
00:18:26,072 --> 00:18:28,839
- WELL, YOU SHOULD
FEEL AWFUL, PAL.
- BUT I DON'T.

350
00:18:28,841 --> 00:18:30,841
I FEEL BETTER,
AND POWERFUL.

351
00:18:30,843 --> 00:18:32,843
THIS IS WHY
PEOPLE HAVE FRIENDS--

352
00:18:32,845 --> 00:18:35,146
SO THEY CAN HIT THEM.

353
00:18:35,148 --> 00:18:38,749
THIS IS INCREDIBLE.
IT'S THE BEST
I'VE EVER FELT!

354
00:18:40,753 --> 00:18:42,853
WELL, THERE'S
THE DOWN SIDE.

355
00:18:52,999 --> 00:18:54,999
- HI.
- HI.

356
00:18:55,001 --> 00:18:57,001
I'M SO SORRY
ABOUT ALL THIS.

357
00:18:57,003 --> 00:18:59,003
FRANK CAN BE
SUCH AN IDIOT.

358
00:18:59,005 --> 00:19:01,038
HOW'S YOUR BROTHER?
IS HE LICKING HIS WOUNDS?

359
00:19:01,040 --> 00:19:04,375
HE TRIED, BUT HE
COULDN'T REACH 'EM,
SO HE MADE HARRY DO IT.

360
00:19:05,945 --> 00:19:08,613
HELLO.

361
00:19:08,615 --> 00:19:10,948
YOU LET
SLEEPING DOGS LIE,
FRANK MULLER.

362
00:19:10,950 --> 00:19:13,884
THIS IS GUY STUFF.
DON'T GET YOUR PANTIES
IN A WAD.

363
00:19:16,022 --> 00:19:18,589
THAT'S SOME
GOOD ADVICE, THANKS.

364
00:19:18,591 --> 00:19:21,259
SO, UH, HOW'RE
YOU DOIN'?

365
00:19:21,261 --> 00:19:24,595
- I'M SWOLLEN, THANK YOU.
- ( chuckles )  SO AM I.

366
00:19:24,597 --> 00:19:26,730
WHY ARE YOU
SUDDENLY SO CIVIL?

367
00:19:26,732 --> 00:19:28,832
NOW WE UNDERSTAND
EACH OTHER'S BOUNDARIES.

368
00:19:28,834 --> 00:19:30,868
YOU KNOW MY LIMITS.
I KNOW YOUR LIMITS.

369
00:19:30,870 --> 00:19:32,903
NOW WE CAN RESPECT
EACH OTHER.

370
00:19:32,905 --> 00:19:35,306
WAIT, LET ME SEE IF I CAN
GET THIS STRAIGHT.

371
00:19:35,308 --> 00:19:38,042
IN ORDER TO ACHIEVE
EACH OTHER'S RESPECT,

372
00:19:38,044 --> 00:19:41,546
YOU HAD TO RESORT TO
VIOLENT CONFRONTATION.

373
00:19:41,548 --> 00:19:43,847
NOW, DOESN'T THAT
STRIKE YOU AS STUPID?

374
00:19:46,519 --> 00:19:48,886
- KIDS, HUH?
- THEY DON'T
UNDERSTAND THE WORLD.

375
00:19:50,590 --> 00:19:53,191
SO, UH,
WE STILL FRIENDS?

376
00:19:53,193 --> 00:19:55,125
SURE.

377
00:19:56,862 --> 00:19:58,829
( weeping )

378
00:20:03,636 --> 00:20:06,270
OKAY, I FINISHED
MY LETTER.

379
00:20:06,272 --> 00:20:08,339
"DEAR PRESIDENT CLINTON,

380
00:20:08,341 --> 00:20:10,575
I'VE SEEN
YOUR PROGRAM ON TV,

381
00:20:10,577 --> 00:20:12,610
AND I THINK
YOU NEED HELP.

382
00:20:14,814 --> 00:20:16,814
MAYBE IN
THE NEXT EPISODE

383
00:20:16,816 --> 00:20:19,750
THERE COULD BE GUNFIRE

384
00:20:19,752 --> 00:20:22,986
OR EVEN SOME EXPLOSIONS.

385
00:20:22,988 --> 00:20:25,690
I KNOW I'D LIKE THAT.

386
00:20:25,692 --> 00:20:28,192
THANKS FOR LETTING ME
SHARE MY THOUGHTS--"

387
00:20:28,194 --> 00:20:30,695
OH, I FORGOT TO INCLUDE
MY NAME AND ADDRESS.

388
00:20:32,898 --> 00:20:34,898
YOU KNOW,
PATTY IS A WOMAN

389
00:20:34,900 --> 00:20:36,900
OF UNEXPECTED DEPTH
AND WISDOM.

390
00:20:36,902 --> 00:20:38,969
SHE DOES THINGS
WITH CONTACT PAPER

391
00:20:38,971 --> 00:20:40,971
MOST WOMEN
CAN ONLY DREAM OF.

392
00:20:40,973 --> 00:20:43,641
I THINK I FINALLY
UNDERSTAND

393
00:20:43,643 --> 00:20:45,643
THIS COMPELLING URGE
TO MAKE FRIENDS.

394
00:20:45,645 --> 00:20:47,878
IT ISN'T INTELLECTUAL
AT ALL.

395
00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:50,615
THESE BODIES HAVE
A BASIC PHYSICAL NEED
FOR OTHER PEOPLE.

396
00:20:50,617 --> 00:20:52,617
WELL, IN A BIOLOGY
THIS PRIMITIVE,

397
00:20:52,619 --> 00:20:54,719
THERE ARE BOUND TO BE
A FEW WEAKNESSES.

398
00:20:54,721 --> 00:20:57,622
BUT THAT'S THE PARADOX.
IT'S NOT A WEAKNESS.

399
00:20:57,624 --> 00:20:59,690
THAT NEED IS WHAT
BRINGS THEM TOGETHER,

400
00:20:59,692 --> 00:21:03,060
AND THAT UNITY
IS AN ENORMOUS
SOURCE OF POWER.

401
00:21:03,062 --> 00:21:06,631
YEAH, IT'S
POWERFUL, ALL RIGHT,
BUT IT'S DANGEROUS.

402
00:21:06,633 --> 00:21:10,301
THERE ARE SOME URGES
WE'RE JUST GOING TO
HAVE TO LEARN TO CONTROL.

403
00:21:10,303 --> 00:21:12,570
WHOA!  THEIR
DAUGHTER'S HOME.

404
00:21:15,141 --> 00:21:17,308
Man:
<i> ♪ PLEASE, WON'T YOU BE ♪</i>

405
00:21:17,310 --> 00:21:19,277
<i> ♪ MY NEIGHBOR? ♪</i>

406
00:21:20,713 --> 00:21:24,348
<i> ( '50s rock music playing )</i>