1 00:00:02,069 --> 00:00:03,802 ♪ LA-LA, LA, LA-LA ♪ 2 00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:16,915 - SO WHY, THEN, ARE WE CONSTANTLY URGING OUR STUDENTS 3 00:00:16,917 --> 00:00:18,650 TO WIN AT ALL COSTS. 4 00:00:18,652 --> 00:00:19,818 WE SHOULD BE TEACHING THEM 5 00:00:19,820 --> 00:00:22,154 THAT FAILURE IS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD. 6 00:00:22,156 --> 00:00:26,125 IN FACT, IT'S OFTEN A STEPPING STONE TO SUCCESS. 7 00:00:26,127 --> 00:00:28,727 AFTER HIS FIRST ATTEMPTS AT FLIGHT FAILED, 8 00:00:28,729 --> 00:00:32,264 WILBUR WRIGHT SAID THAT NOT WITHIN A THOUSAND YEARS 9 00:00:32,266 --> 00:00:33,832 WOULD MAN EVER FLY. 10 00:00:33,834 --> 00:00:37,102 IT TOOK THOMAS EDISON MORE THAN 2,000 EXPERIMENTS 11 00:00:37,104 --> 00:00:39,138 BEFORE HE INVENTED THE LIGHTBULB. 12 00:00:39,140 --> 00:00:43,275 FAILURE IS THE SIGNPOST THAT POINTS THE WAY TO SUCCESS. 13 00:00:43,277 --> 00:00:45,810 - OH. 14 00:00:48,048 --> 00:00:50,548 PROFESSOR BENTLEY WAS SO INSPIRING. 15 00:00:50,550 --> 00:00:52,918 I CAN'T BELIEVE HOW MUCH I'M GETTING OUT OF THIS SEMINAR. 16 00:00:52,920 --> 00:00:56,755 - MORE THAN THE $20 A MEAL PER DIEM THE REST OF US ARE GETTING! 17 00:00:56,757 --> 00:00:59,725 - NO, NO, NO, WE'RE ALL GETTING THE SAME AMOUNT, 18 00:00:59,727 --> 00:01:01,793 AND I THINK THE $50-- OH, $20 THAT I'M--WE'RE GETTING 19 00:01:01,795 --> 00:01:03,695 IS PRETTY GENEROUS. 20 00:01:03,697 --> 00:01:04,863 DAMN! 21 00:01:04,865 --> 00:01:07,265 - I WAS ESPECIALLY INTRIGUED BY HIS NOTION 22 00:01:07,267 --> 00:01:09,133 OF PLANTING THE SEEDS OF TOMORROW 23 00:01:09,135 --> 00:01:10,469 IN THE STUDENTS OF TODAY. 24 00:01:10,471 --> 00:01:12,771 - IF HE TRIED THAT AROUND ANY OF MY STUDENTS, 25 00:01:12,773 --> 00:01:15,707 THEY'D BE THE LAST DAMN SEEDS HE EVER PLANTED. 26 00:01:15,709 --> 00:01:17,910 - MISS BARCH, PLEASE RELAX AND ENJOY YOUR SURF AND TURF. 27 00:01:17,912 --> 00:01:18,911 - FRIGGIN' SURF AND TURF. 28 00:01:18,913 --> 00:01:20,612 - [chuckles nervously] 29 00:01:22,683 --> 00:01:25,116 "I WILL WAKE UP REFRESHED AND READY 30 00:01:25,118 --> 00:01:26,952 TO MEET LIFE'S CHALLENGES. 31 00:01:26,954 --> 00:01:29,053 "I WILL WAKE UP-- 32 00:01:30,458 --> 00:01:32,023 - [groans] 33 00:01:32,025 --> 00:01:34,192 - WHAT IF THERE'S A THOMAS EDISON IN MY CLASS 34 00:01:34,194 --> 00:01:36,128 JUST WAITING TO BE NURTURED AND ENCOURAGED? 35 00:01:36,130 --> 00:01:39,797 - [screams] 36 00:01:39,799 --> 00:01:40,898 - WELL, GOOD NIGHT, ANTHON-- 37 00:01:40,900 --> 00:01:43,235 - [snoring] 38 00:01:43,237 --> 00:01:44,669 - UM, OKAY. 39 00:01:44,671 --> 00:01:48,072 [snoring] 40 00:01:48,074 --> 00:01:51,009 [knocking on door] 41 00:01:53,580 --> 00:01:54,812 - COME ON, SKINNY. 42 00:01:54,814 --> 00:01:56,614 I PICKED THE LOCK TO THE HOUSEKEEPING CLOSET, 43 00:01:56,616 --> 00:01:58,917 AND WE'VE ONLY GOT FOUR HOURS TILL THE MAIDS ARRIVE FOR WORK. 44 00:01:58,919 --> 00:02:01,352 - JANET, I REALLY THINK WE NEED TO BE MORE DISCREET. 45 00:02:01,354 --> 00:02:02,353 - NYAH! 46 00:02:02,355 --> 00:02:03,822 - FOUR HOURS? 47 00:02:03,824 --> 00:02:07,692 SO, CLASS, YOUR ASSIGNMENT IS TO PICK SOMETHING 48 00:02:07,694 --> 00:02:09,161 YOU KNOW YOU'LL FAIL AT 49 00:02:09,163 --> 00:02:12,264 TO PROVE THAT FAILING ISN'T THE END OF THE WORLD. 50 00:02:12,266 --> 00:02:14,766 - THERE GOES MY MOTIVATION. - RELAX. 51 00:02:14,768 --> 00:02:16,901 AT LEAST HE'S NOT MAKING US GUESS PEOPLE'S IDENTITIES 52 00:02:16,903 --> 00:02:17,902 BY FEELING THEIR HANDS. 53 00:02:17,904 --> 00:02:18,904 - AGAIN. 54 00:02:18,906 --> 00:02:20,605 - BRITTANY, WHAT IS SOMETHING 55 00:02:20,607 --> 00:02:22,174 YOU'RE SURE YOU'D FAIL AT? 56 00:02:22,176 --> 00:02:24,776 - UM, I DON'T THINK I COULD EVER BE UNPOPULAR. 57 00:02:24,778 --> 00:02:26,044 - EXCELLENT. 58 00:02:26,046 --> 00:02:27,946 - I'M... RIGHT? 59 00:02:27,948 --> 00:02:29,982 - IT GETS EASIER AFTER THE FIRST TIME. 60 00:02:29,984 --> 00:02:32,985 - BRITTANY, YOU WILL FAIL AT BECOMING UNPOPULAR. 61 00:02:32,987 --> 00:02:34,653 - THEN I'VE ALREADY PASSED. 62 00:02:34,655 --> 00:02:35,654 - [chuckles] 63 00:02:35,656 --> 00:02:37,389 WE'LL TALK LATER. 64 00:02:37,391 --> 00:02:39,491 WHO ELSE WANTS TO PICK WHAT THEY'RE GOING TO FAIL AT? 65 00:02:39,493 --> 00:02:40,826 KEVIN, WHAT ABOUT YOU? 66 00:02:40,828 --> 00:02:41,827 - ME? 67 00:02:41,829 --> 00:02:42,827 I'M THE Q.B. 68 00:02:42,829 --> 00:02:45,631 - SO YOU'RE SAYING YOU'D FAIL 69 00:02:45,633 --> 00:02:47,165 AT BEING A BAD ATHLETE. 70 00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:48,433 GOOD, VERY GOOD. 71 00:02:48,435 --> 00:02:49,535 JODIE? 72 00:02:49,537 --> 00:02:52,037 - MY PARENTS MAKE ME SPEND MY ENTIRE SUMMER 73 00:02:52,039 --> 00:02:53,739 DOING VOLUNTEER WORK THAT'LL LOOK GOOD 74 00:02:53,741 --> 00:02:55,340 ON MY COLLEGE APPLICATION. 75 00:02:55,342 --> 00:02:57,309 I'D NEVER BE ABLE TO GET THE SUMMER OFF. 76 00:02:57,311 --> 00:02:58,744 - PERFECT. MACK? 77 00:02:58,746 --> 00:03:00,345 - I COULD TRY TEACHING KEVIN 78 00:03:00,347 --> 00:03:02,114 THE THREE BRANCHES OF AMERICAN GOVERNMENT. 79 00:03:02,116 --> 00:03:03,715 - AH, COME ON, I KNOW THAT ONE. 80 00:03:03,717 --> 00:03:06,852 REPUBLICAN, UM... DOMINICAN, AND ARISTOCAT. 81 00:03:06,854 --> 00:03:08,020 - THAT'S VERY GOOD, MACK. 82 00:03:08,022 --> 00:03:10,289 - HEY, I'M THE ONE WHO GAVE THE ANSWER. 83 00:03:10,291 --> 00:03:13,091 - NOW, THE REST OF YOU PLEASE PICK SOMETHING TO FAIL AT 84 00:03:13,093 --> 00:03:14,560 SO YOU CAN PUT IT TO THE TEST. 85 00:03:14,562 --> 00:03:16,161 - WE'RE HAVING A TEST TOO? 86 00:03:16,163 --> 00:03:18,964 - SO WHAT ARE YOU GONNA FAIL AT, GIVING A DAMN? 87 00:03:18,966 --> 00:03:21,499 - I COULD FAIL TO SEE THE MERIT OF THIS ASSIGNMENT. 88 00:03:21,501 --> 00:03:23,602 - OR SUCCEED IN FINDING IT A WASTE OF TIME. 89 00:03:23,604 --> 00:03:27,138 MAYBE YOU SHOULD TRY FAILING AT NOT BEING SARCASTIC. 90 00:03:27,140 --> 00:03:29,140 - YEAH, THAT'S A GOOD IDEA. 91 00:03:29,142 --> 00:03:32,043 - SANDI, HOW LONG TILL THE TEEN FASHION EXTRAVAGANZA 92 00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:33,044 OPENS AT THE MALL? 93 00:03:33,046 --> 00:03:36,081 - FIVE DAYS, TWO HOURS, AND 23 MINUTES. 94 00:03:36,083 --> 00:03:38,917 GOD, STACY, WHY DON'T YOU GET A NEW WATCH? 95 00:03:38,919 --> 00:03:42,087 ONE WITHOUT A LITTLE CARTOON LOSER POINTING AT THE TIME? 96 00:03:42,089 --> 00:03:45,090 - I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE EXTRAVAGANZA. 97 00:03:45,092 --> 00:03:47,693 THE COME-BUY-ME SMELL OF NEW CLOTHES, 98 00:03:47,695 --> 00:03:49,828 THE FLASHING LIGHTS OF THE FASHION SHOW, 99 00:03:49,830 --> 00:03:51,830 THE CRISP SOUND OF TISSUE PAPER 100 00:03:51,832 --> 00:03:53,699 AS IT'S WRAPPED AROUND AN ALPACA SWEATER 101 00:03:53,701 --> 00:03:55,200 WITH A MATCHING SILK "T." 102 00:03:55,202 --> 00:03:56,501 - STOP IT, QUINN. 103 00:03:56,503 --> 00:03:58,103 YOU'RE MAKING MY HEAD SPIN. 104 00:03:58,105 --> 00:04:01,106 - MY MOUTH, IT'S WATERING. 105 00:04:01,108 --> 00:04:02,874 - I JUST PICKED WHAT I'M GONNA FAIL AT, 106 00:04:02,876 --> 00:04:05,744 GETTING QUINN GROUNDED SO SHE CAN'T GO TO THAT THING. 107 00:04:05,746 --> 00:04:06,744 - EXCELLENT. 108 00:04:06,746 --> 00:04:08,847 - THIS WAY, IF I BLOW THE ASSIGNMENT 109 00:04:08,849 --> 00:04:10,916 AND QUINN IS GROUNDED, I STILL WIN. 110 00:04:10,918 --> 00:04:13,484 - OKAY, NOW YOU GOT TO HELP ME PICK SOMETHING TO FAIL AT, 111 00:04:13,486 --> 00:04:14,685 SOMETHING REALLY IMPRESSIVE 112 00:04:14,687 --> 00:04:16,788 THAT DOESN'T REQUIRE ANY EFFORT OF ANY KIND. 113 00:04:16,790 --> 00:04:19,357 - HOW ABOUT PERFORMING BRAIN SURGERY ON KEVIN? 114 00:04:19,359 --> 00:04:20,825 - I SAID NO EFFORT. 115 00:04:20,827 --> 00:04:22,760 FINDING THAT BRAIN COULD TAKE WEEKS. 116 00:04:22,762 --> 00:04:25,530 - THEN HOW ABOUT BEING CONVENTIONAL, 117 00:04:25,532 --> 00:04:27,832 LOOKING AND ACTING LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE? 118 00:04:27,834 --> 00:04:29,968 IT'LL TAKE YOU NO TIME TO FAIL AT THAT. 119 00:04:29,970 --> 00:04:30,969 - WHAT ARE YOU SAYING, 120 00:04:30,971 --> 00:04:32,270 I'M SOME KIND OF FREAK OF NATURE? 121 00:04:32,272 --> 00:04:34,105 - DEFINE "OF NATURE." 122 00:04:34,107 --> 00:04:35,540 - HOW MUCH LONGER NOW, SANDI? 123 00:04:35,542 --> 00:04:39,310 - FIVE DAYS, TWO HOURS, AND 22 MINUTES. 124 00:04:39,312 --> 00:04:41,746 - UM, YOU FORGOT TO SAY THE SECONDS. 125 00:04:41,748 --> 00:04:43,682 - STACY. 126 00:04:43,684 --> 00:04:47,785 - NEXT WE HAVE REASON NUMBER 17, ENDANGERING A MINOR. 127 00:04:47,787 --> 00:04:51,489 THE TEEN FASHION EXTRAVAGANZA REINFORCES THE FALSE NOTION 128 00:04:51,491 --> 00:04:53,558 THAT ALL YOU NEED TO SURVIVE IS A CREDIT CARD 129 00:04:53,560 --> 00:04:55,026 AND A PAIR OF ANKLE BOOTS. 130 00:04:55,028 --> 00:04:57,229 THIS MISAPPREHENSION COULD PROVE FATAL 131 00:04:57,231 --> 00:04:59,864 SHOULD QUINN EVER FIND HERSELF STRANDED IN THE WILD. 132 00:04:59,866 --> 00:05:02,334 - ALTHOUGH NOT IF SHE'S STRANDED IN THE WILD PAIR. 133 00:05:02,336 --> 00:05:04,435 - YOU KNOW I'M GONNA FAIL AT THIS. 134 00:05:04,437 --> 00:05:07,538 THEY'LL SAY QUINN HAS TO LEARN BY MAKING HER OWN MISTAKES 135 00:05:07,540 --> 00:05:08,840 OUTSIDE THE HOUSE, 136 00:05:08,842 --> 00:05:11,343 FREEING UP THE PHONE FOR MY MOTHER'S CAVALCADE 137 00:05:11,345 --> 00:05:12,644 OF OBSESSIVE BUSINESS CALLS. 138 00:05:12,646 --> 00:05:14,780 - WHY, OH, WHY CAN'T SHE 139 00:05:14,782 --> 00:05:17,248 JUST HAVE A SUBSTANCE ABUSE PROBLEM LIKE A NORMAL MOM? 140 00:05:17,250 --> 00:05:18,650 - I'M GONNA HEAD HOME. 141 00:05:18,652 --> 00:05:22,120 I WANT TO SEE IF THEY DELIVERED MY HYDROCEPHALIC SKULL REPLICA. 142 00:05:22,122 --> 00:05:23,188 - WAIT! 143 00:05:23,190 --> 00:05:25,057 IT'S TIME FOR THE MOMENT OF TRUTH. 144 00:05:25,059 --> 00:05:27,926 SO, LIKE, DO I LOOK CONVENTIONAL OR WHATEVER? 145 00:05:27,928 --> 00:05:28,860 - AH! 146 00:05:37,104 --> 00:05:38,970 - HEY, DARIA, YOU KNOW THAT ASSIGNMENT 147 00:05:38,972 --> 00:05:41,873 FOR MR. O'NEILL'S CLASS WHERE I'M SUPPOSED TO BE UNPOPULAR? 148 00:05:41,875 --> 00:05:44,743 WELL, I THOUGHT YOU'D BE THE PERFECT PERSON TO ASK FOR HELP 149 00:05:44,745 --> 00:05:47,479 SINCE YOU'RE SO, UM... SMART. 150 00:05:47,481 --> 00:05:48,480 - UH-HUH. 151 00:05:48,482 --> 00:05:50,982 - SO DO YOU HAVE ANY SUGGESTIONS 152 00:05:50,984 --> 00:05:55,119 SINCE YOU KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT, YOU KNOW, STUFF? 153 00:05:55,121 --> 00:05:56,187 - HMM. 154 00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:58,255 TRY TALKING ABOUT GLOBAL CONCERNS, 155 00:05:58,257 --> 00:06:01,292 LIKE THE WORLDWIDE PROLIFERATION OF BIOLOGICAL WEAPONS 156 00:06:01,294 --> 00:06:04,028 OR HOW PEOPLE IN AFGHANISTAN ARE BEING STONED TO DEATH 157 00:06:04,030 --> 00:06:05,196 FOR WEARING THE WRONG ATTIRE. 158 00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:06,965 - YOU HEAR THAT, STACY? 159 00:06:06,967 --> 00:06:08,700 - DARIA, YOU'RE MAKING ME SAD. 160 00:06:08,702 --> 00:06:10,502 NOBODY WANTS TO HEAR THAT STUFF. 161 00:06:10,504 --> 00:06:12,804 NO WONDER YOU'RE SO... 162 00:06:12,806 --> 00:06:14,305 - SMART? 163 00:06:15,542 --> 00:06:17,909 - MOM, DAD, COULD I TALK TO YOU FOR A MINUTE? 164 00:06:17,911 --> 00:06:19,244 - MM-HMM. - UH-HUH. 165 00:06:19,246 --> 00:06:21,279 - I'VE WORKED HARD THIS YEAR AND REALLY NEED A BREAK. 166 00:06:21,281 --> 00:06:24,316 SO I WAS THINKING THAT INSTEAD OF TAKING COLLEGE PREP CLASSES, 167 00:06:24,318 --> 00:06:25,850 VOLUNTEERING AT THE HOSPICE, 168 00:06:25,852 --> 00:06:28,353 AND BEING A CAMP COUNSELOR FOR SPECIAL NEEDS KIDS, 169 00:06:28,355 --> 00:06:30,922 I COULD TAKE IT EASY, MAYBE EVEN GO TO THE BEACH. 170 00:06:30,924 --> 00:06:34,392 - HMM, THAT WORKLOAD DOESN'T SOUND VERY REALISTIC. 171 00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:36,394 - SHE FORGOT THE 20 HOUR A WEEK INTERNSHIP 172 00:06:36,396 --> 00:06:37,562 AT THE CONGRESSMAN'S OFFICE. 173 00:06:37,564 --> 00:06:38,563 - OH, YEAH. 174 00:06:38,565 --> 00:06:40,331 NOPE. - OUT OF THE QUESTION. 175 00:06:40,333 --> 00:06:42,266 - ASSIGNMENT COMPLETED. 176 00:06:44,704 --> 00:06:47,072 - WHAT'S THAT YOU'RE REALLY STIRRING IN YOUR TEA, 177 00:06:47,074 --> 00:06:48,906 HONEY OR BEE VOMIT? 178 00:06:48,908 --> 00:06:51,076 ANIMAL SECRETIONS THAT MAKE US SAY, "YUM!" 179 00:06:51,078 --> 00:06:52,744 TONIGHT ON SICK, SAD WORLD. 180 00:06:52,746 --> 00:06:55,414 - HEY, JANIE, LISTEN TO THIS. 181 00:06:55,416 --> 00:07:00,318 "SINCE I LEFT YOUR WOMB, I'VE LIVED LIFE IN A TOMB." 182 00:07:00,320 --> 00:07:01,520 DOES THAT WORK? 183 00:07:01,522 --> 00:07:03,287 - I GUESS AS UTERINE TESTIMONIALS GO, 184 00:07:03,289 --> 00:07:04,289 IT'S NOT BAD. 185 00:07:04,291 --> 00:07:06,725 - WHOA, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? 186 00:07:06,727 --> 00:07:08,894 - LIKE, DON'T YOU KNOW FASHION WHEN YOU SEE IT? 187 00:07:08,896 --> 00:07:10,028 - UM... 188 00:07:10,030 --> 00:07:11,495 - THERE'S THIS ASSIGNMENT FOR SCHOOL 189 00:07:11,497 --> 00:07:13,497 WHERE WE HAVE TO PICK SOMETHING WE KNOW WE'D FAIL AT, 190 00:07:13,499 --> 00:07:14,733 SO I PICKED BEING CONVENTIONAL. 191 00:07:14,735 --> 00:07:15,834 - OH. 192 00:07:15,836 --> 00:07:16,835 WHAT? 193 00:07:16,837 --> 00:07:18,670 - I'M SUCCEEDING AT FAILING. 194 00:07:18,672 --> 00:07:22,807 - SUCCEEDING TO FAIL, I'M ON THE THIRD RAIL. 195 00:07:22,809 --> 00:07:24,942 NOPE, I STILL DON'T GET IT. 196 00:07:24,944 --> 00:07:27,679 [doorbell rings] 197 00:07:27,681 --> 00:07:29,047 - YO. - HEY, TOM. 198 00:07:29,049 --> 00:07:31,382 UM, DON'T ABANDON HER NOW, MAN. 199 00:07:31,384 --> 00:07:32,383 SHE NEEDS YOU. 200 00:07:32,385 --> 00:07:33,751 - WHY WOULD I ABANDON-- 201 00:07:35,389 --> 00:07:37,389 - SHE NEEDS YOU. 202 00:07:37,391 --> 00:07:38,390 - HEY, FLYBOY. 203 00:07:38,392 --> 00:07:39,891 - IS THAT A TEDDY BEAR BACKPACK? 204 00:07:39,893 --> 00:07:40,992 - UH-HUH. 205 00:07:40,994 --> 00:07:42,594 DO YOU WANT TO TEST OUT MY NEW LIP GLOSS? 206 00:07:42,596 --> 00:07:43,995 IT'S KIWI FLAVORED. 207 00:07:43,997 --> 00:07:45,329 - WELL, I GUESS IF I KISSED YOU, 208 00:07:45,331 --> 00:07:47,566 AT LEAST MY EYES WOULD BE CLOSED. 209 00:07:47,568 --> 00:07:49,768 - NOW, HAVING THREE BRANCHES OF GOVERNMENT 210 00:07:49,770 --> 00:07:51,469 ALLOWS FOR A SYSTEM OF CHECKS AND BALANCES. 211 00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:53,772 - MY DAD HAD THE WHEELS BALANCED ON HIS EL CAMINO YESTERDAY. 212 00:07:53,774 --> 00:07:55,439 HE WROTE A CHECK. 213 00:07:55,441 --> 00:07:57,842 HEY, WHEN ARE WE GONNA GET TO THE GOOD STUFF? 214 00:07:57,844 --> 00:07:59,677 I WANT TO KNOW HOW THEY TAUGHT THOSE ARISTOCATS 215 00:07:59,679 --> 00:08:01,580 TO PLAY THE PIANO. 216 00:08:04,217 --> 00:08:05,850 - ISN'T IT REALLY, REALLY GREAT 217 00:08:05,852 --> 00:08:08,552 WHEN TEACHERS COME OUT LIKE THIS TO SUPPORT THE TEAM? 218 00:08:08,554 --> 00:08:10,321 GOD, I HOPE THEY DON'T TALK TO US. 219 00:08:13,327 --> 00:08:14,626 - OH, MY GOSH. 220 00:08:14,628 --> 00:08:15,827 THAT REMINDS ME. 221 00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:16,828 UM... 222 00:08:16,830 --> 00:08:18,896 HEY, DID YOU KNOW THAT, UM, 223 00:08:18,898 --> 00:08:21,366 THERE ARE MORE BIORHYTHMICAL WEAPONS THAN EVER 224 00:08:21,368 --> 00:08:23,267 IN THE RAINFORESTS OF AFGHANISTAN, 225 00:08:23,269 --> 00:08:25,804 AND THEY BLOW UP IF YOU WEAR THE WRONG CLOTHES? 226 00:08:25,806 --> 00:08:26,805 - EWW. - THAT'S GROSS. 227 00:08:26,807 --> 00:08:28,105 - GROSS. 228 00:08:28,107 --> 00:08:30,942 - GEE, BRITT, YOU'RE REALLY ACTING ICKY TODAY. 229 00:08:30,944 --> 00:08:33,110 - GOSH, ANTHONY, THIS IS MARVELOUS. 230 00:08:33,112 --> 00:08:36,213 IT'S NICE TO SEE OUR STUDENTS SO ENTHUSIASTIC AND EXCITED. 231 00:08:36,215 --> 00:08:38,950 - YOU MEAN INSTEAD OF THE WAY WE USUALLY SEE THEM, 232 00:08:38,952 --> 00:08:41,385 WISHING FERVENTLY FOR OUR DEATHS? 233 00:08:41,387 --> 00:08:42,620 - [chuckles] 234 00:08:42,622 --> 00:08:45,457 OH, LOOK, KEVIN. HELLO, KEVIN! 235 00:08:45,459 --> 00:08:49,293 - UH-OH, HE CAME TO MAKE SURE I'M DOING MY HOMEWORK. 236 00:08:49,295 --> 00:08:50,829 OKAY. 237 00:08:50,831 --> 00:08:52,296 HIKE! 238 00:08:52,298 --> 00:08:54,065 HERE YOU GO. 239 00:08:54,067 --> 00:08:55,567 [crowd groans] 240 00:08:55,569 --> 00:08:57,368 - WHAT THE HELL'D YOU DO THAT FOR? 241 00:08:57,370 --> 00:08:58,669 - HE'S CHECKING UP ON ME, BRO. 242 00:09:00,507 --> 00:09:03,308 - BRITTANY, YOUR BOYFRIEND JUST THREW AN INTERCEPTION 243 00:09:03,310 --> 00:09:04,309 ON PURPOSE. 244 00:09:04,311 --> 00:09:05,943 - WELL, UM, THAT'S NOTHING 245 00:09:05,945 --> 00:09:08,313 COMPARED TO THE WORKING CONDITIONS FOR THE LABORERS 246 00:09:08,315 --> 00:09:10,181 IN THE UNEXPLODED DIAMOND MINES. 247 00:09:10,183 --> 00:09:11,382 - WHAT? 248 00:09:11,384 --> 00:09:12,984 - YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK'S WRONG WITH KEVIN? 249 00:09:12,986 --> 00:09:15,953 I THINK ALL YOUR YUCKY STORIES GOT TO HIM. 250 00:09:15,955 --> 00:09:18,889 - [whimpering] 251 00:09:20,960 --> 00:09:22,494 - I FEEL BAD ABOUT BRITTANY. 252 00:09:22,496 --> 00:09:23,694 IT'S LIKE SHE'S LOST HER WAY. 253 00:09:23,696 --> 00:09:25,029 - SHE DOES THAT ALL THE TIME. 254 00:09:25,031 --> 00:09:27,465 - NO, I MEAN, LIKE, SHE'S FORGOTTEN WHO SHE IS. 255 00:09:27,467 --> 00:09:28,733 - LIKE I SAID. 256 00:09:28,735 --> 00:09:31,135 - THIS IS A BAD TIME FOR HER TO BE ACTING WEIRD. 257 00:09:31,137 --> 00:09:33,237 I MEAN, WITH KEVIN PLAYING SO SUCKY AND EVERYTHING. 258 00:09:33,239 --> 00:09:34,539 - OH, NO, LISA. 259 00:09:34,541 --> 00:09:36,975 - YES, ANGIE, LET'S BE HONEST. 260 00:09:36,977 --> 00:09:39,810 MAYBE IT'S TIME FOR SOME NEW FACES ON THE CHEERLEADING SQUAD. 261 00:09:39,812 --> 00:09:42,146 - BUT I DON'T WANT TO GET A NEW FACE. 262 00:09:42,148 --> 00:09:44,749 - FRESH NEW FACES, FRESH NEW ATTITUDE. 263 00:09:46,919 --> 00:09:48,486 [all whispering] 264 00:09:48,488 --> 00:09:50,255 - I DON'T WANT TO GO. YOU GO. 265 00:09:50,257 --> 00:09:51,957 - HI, ARE YOU NEW IN SCHOOL? 266 00:09:51,959 --> 00:09:52,958 I'M LISA. 267 00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:53,959 THIS IS ANGIE AND NICKY. 268 00:09:53,961 --> 00:09:55,193 - WE WERE JUST WONDERING, 269 00:09:55,195 --> 00:09:57,395 HAVE YOU EVER DONE ANY CHEERLEADING? 270 00:09:57,397 --> 00:09:59,097 - CHEERLEADING? 271 00:09:59,099 --> 00:10:01,332 - ERIC, I WONDER IF WE COULD FINISH THIS 272 00:10:01,334 --> 00:10:02,734 AT THE OFFICE TOMORROW. 273 00:10:02,736 --> 00:10:04,401 MY DAUGHTER JUST CAME HOME FROM SCHOOL, 274 00:10:04,403 --> 00:10:05,837 AND I WANT TO CATCH UP WITH HER. 275 00:10:05,839 --> 00:10:07,171 THANKS. 276 00:10:07,173 --> 00:10:08,572 DARIA, PERFECT TIMING. 277 00:10:08,574 --> 00:10:10,341 I THINK I CAN STILL CATCH OUR BROKER. 278 00:10:10,343 --> 00:10:12,276 - I ENJOYED OUR TIME TOGETHER. 279 00:10:12,278 --> 00:10:15,313 - WHAT'S THIS $230 AT CC'S BOUTIQUE? 280 00:10:15,315 --> 00:10:18,149 AND $50 AT THE DOODAD STORE? 281 00:10:18,151 --> 00:10:20,451 - THAT REMINDS ME, IF YOU SEE QUINN, 282 00:10:20,453 --> 00:10:21,920 TELL HER CASHMAN'S CALLED. 283 00:10:21,922 --> 00:10:24,155 THEY SAID IT'S CASHMAN'S CASHMIRACLE WEEK, 284 00:10:24,157 --> 00:10:26,958 AND THEY HAVE ALL KINDS OF CREATIVE NEW FINANCING OPTIONS 285 00:10:26,960 --> 00:10:28,026 THEY WANT TO TELL HER ABOUT. 286 00:10:28,028 --> 00:10:29,827 - CASHMIRACLE? 287 00:10:29,829 --> 00:10:31,029 DID YOU HEAR THAT, HELEN? 288 00:10:31,031 --> 00:10:32,463 - LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE. 289 00:10:32,465 --> 00:10:35,033 SHE CAN'T POSSIBLY GET TO CASHMAN'S BEFORE MONDAY 290 00:10:35,035 --> 00:10:36,234 SINCE SHE'LL BE AT 291 00:10:36,236 --> 00:10:38,202 THE TEEN FASHION EXTRAVAGANZA THIS WEEKEND. 292 00:10:38,204 --> 00:10:39,370 - EXTRAVAGANZA? 293 00:10:39,372 --> 00:10:40,604 WHAT EXTRAVAGANZA? 294 00:10:40,606 --> 00:10:41,806 - OH, IT'S NOTHING. 295 00:10:41,808 --> 00:10:43,441 JUST THE SPENDING EVENT OF THE SEASON 296 00:10:43,443 --> 00:10:44,609 FOR THE UNDER 20 SET. 297 00:10:44,611 --> 00:10:45,743 - GOOD GOD! 298 00:10:45,745 --> 00:10:46,744 HELEN! 299 00:10:46,746 --> 00:10:48,046 - JAKE, CALM DOWN. 300 00:10:48,048 --> 00:10:49,514 - MAYBE SHE HASN'T HEARD ABOUT IT YET. 301 00:10:49,516 --> 00:10:52,450 I COULD UNPLUG THE TV, BLACK OUT THE WINDOWS. 302 00:10:52,452 --> 00:10:55,653 WHERE'S QUINN RIGHT NOW? 303 00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:57,855 - AT THE TEEN FASHION EXTRAVAGANZA 304 00:10:57,857 --> 00:10:59,657 PREFERRED CUSTOMER PREVIEW. 305 00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:00,658 WHY DO YOU ASK? 306 00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:01,659 - GAH! 307 00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:02,660 THAT'S IT, DARIA! 308 00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:03,728 QUINN'S GROUNDED! 309 00:11:03,730 --> 00:11:05,630 - JAKE, WE CAN'T PUNISH QUINN 310 00:11:05,632 --> 00:11:07,165 WHEN SHE HASN'T DONE ANYTHING WRONG. 311 00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:08,533 - WHY NOT? 312 00:11:08,535 --> 00:11:10,602 - YEAH, THEY DO IT ALL THE TIME IN AFGHANISTAN. 313 00:11:10,604 --> 00:11:12,604 - I TELL YOU WHAT, DARIA. 314 00:11:12,606 --> 00:11:15,339 SINCE YOU'RE SO CONCERNED ABOUT QUINN'S SPENDING, 315 00:11:15,341 --> 00:11:17,242 WHY DON'T YOU GO WITH HER SATURDAY 316 00:11:17,244 --> 00:11:18,643 TO HELP HER KEEP IT UNDER CONTROL? 317 00:11:18,645 --> 00:11:20,245 - BUT NOW I'M BEING PUNISHED 318 00:11:20,247 --> 00:11:21,746 WHEN I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING WRONG. 319 00:11:21,748 --> 00:11:22,913 - NONSENSE. 320 00:11:22,915 --> 00:11:24,782 CONSIDER IT A WAY TO PAY OFF THIS BILL 321 00:11:24,784 --> 00:11:28,019 FROM THE ANATOMICAL ABNORMALITIES CATALOG. 322 00:11:28,021 --> 00:11:30,488 - DAMN HYDROCEPHALIC SKULL REPLICAS. 323 00:11:30,490 --> 00:11:31,455 - EWW! 324 00:11:40,500 --> 00:11:43,435 [Brittany weeping] 325 00:11:45,272 --> 00:11:46,638 - LET ME GUESS. 326 00:11:46,640 --> 00:11:48,906 A TEEN MOVIE STAR CHOKED ON HIS GUM. 327 00:11:48,908 --> 00:11:52,043 - THAT OR THE CAFETERIA RAN OUT OF BENDY STRAWS AGAIN. 328 00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:53,578 - GOOD MORNING, EVERYONE. 329 00:11:53,580 --> 00:11:56,047 I'M EXCITED TO HEAR HOW YOUR ASSIGNMENTS TURNED OUT. 330 00:11:56,049 --> 00:11:57,482 WHO'D LIKE TO START? 331 00:11:57,484 --> 00:11:58,483 BRITTANY? 332 00:11:58,485 --> 00:11:59,484 - [whimpering] 333 00:11:59,486 --> 00:12:01,753 - OKAY, THEN. JODIE? 334 00:12:01,755 --> 00:12:03,988 - I FAILED TO CONVINCE MY MOTHER AND FATHER 335 00:12:03,990 --> 00:12:05,256 TO LET ME HAVE THE SUMMER OFF. 336 00:12:05,258 --> 00:12:06,257 - EXCELLENT. 337 00:12:06,259 --> 00:12:07,458 AND SEE? 338 00:12:07,460 --> 00:12:09,360 YOU LEARNED THAT FAILURE ISN'T SO BAD NOW, IS IT? 339 00:12:09,362 --> 00:12:11,062 - NO, I LEARNED THAT MY PARENTS 340 00:12:11,064 --> 00:12:13,064 WOULD RATHER I DROPPED DEAD FROM EXHAUSTION 341 00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:14,866 THAN MISS THE OPPORTUNITY TO SHRED 342 00:12:14,868 --> 00:12:18,169 SOME BRIBE-TAKING CONGRESSMAN'S INCRIMINATING PHONE BILLS. 343 00:12:18,171 --> 00:12:20,438 - AT LEAST SHE'LL BE LEARNING A MARKETABLE SKILL. 344 00:12:20,440 --> 00:12:22,273 - UM, HOW ABOUT YOU, KEVIN? 345 00:12:22,275 --> 00:12:23,674 - I'M A CRAPPY ATHLETE. 346 00:12:23,676 --> 00:12:24,776 THEY THREW ME OFF THE TEAM. 347 00:12:24,778 --> 00:12:27,445 - SO YOU SUCCEEDED AT YOUR ASSIGNMENT. 348 00:12:27,447 --> 00:12:28,712 - SUCCEEDED? 349 00:12:28,714 --> 00:12:29,881 I LOST THE GAME. 350 00:12:29,883 --> 00:12:31,648 - GOOD THING HE HAS THAT PHYSICS SCHOLARSHIP 351 00:12:31,650 --> 00:12:32,650 TO FALL BACK ON. 352 00:12:32,652 --> 00:12:33,751 - OH, DEAR. 353 00:12:33,753 --> 00:12:35,719 WELL, I THINK YOU'RE ALL WINNERS. 354 00:12:35,721 --> 00:12:36,754 THOSE OF YOU WHO FAILED 355 00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:38,889 SUCCEEDED IN COMPLETING THE ASSIGNMENT, 356 00:12:38,891 --> 00:12:41,825 AND BECAUSE THOSE OF YOU WHO UNEXPECTEDLY SUCCEEDED 357 00:12:41,827 --> 00:12:42,960 FAILED THE ASSIGNMENT, 358 00:12:42,962 --> 00:12:45,196 YOU ALSO SUCCEEDED IN FAILING. 359 00:12:45,198 --> 00:12:46,331 ISN'T THAT GREAT? 360 00:12:46,333 --> 00:12:48,032 - HEY. 361 00:12:48,034 --> 00:12:49,534 I'M NOT JUST A LOSER. 362 00:12:49,536 --> 00:12:51,369 I'M DATING A LOSER. 363 00:12:51,371 --> 00:12:53,605 - [whimpering] 364 00:12:53,607 --> 00:12:55,306 - NOW, CLASS, REMEMBER. 365 00:12:55,308 --> 00:12:57,041 LIFE'S MADE UP OF PEAKS AND VALLEYS. 366 00:12:57,043 --> 00:12:59,677 AND JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE TEMPORARY CAUGHT IN A VALLEY... 367 00:12:59,679 --> 00:13:01,945 UM, CLASS? 368 00:13:03,550 --> 00:13:05,683 [weeping] 369 00:13:05,685 --> 00:13:08,186 - YOU MUST BE GLAD THE ASSIGNMENT'S OVER. 370 00:13:08,188 --> 00:13:09,788 NOW YOU CAN WASH OFF THE BODY GLITTER. 371 00:13:09,790 --> 00:13:12,390 - NAH, I THINK I'M GONNA STAY CONVENTIONAL. 372 00:13:12,392 --> 00:13:13,391 - WHAT? 373 00:13:13,393 --> 00:13:14,692 - WHY KID MYSELF? 374 00:13:14,694 --> 00:13:17,128 IT WAS EASY TO FIT IN, TOO EASY. 375 00:13:17,130 --> 00:13:18,563 MAYBE I REALLY AM ONE OF THEM. 376 00:13:18,565 --> 00:13:19,831 - DON'T BE RIDICULOUS. 377 00:13:19,833 --> 00:13:21,499 - THEY WANT ME FOR THE SQUAD. 378 00:13:21,501 --> 00:13:24,102 - I HOPE YOU MEAN THE KIND WHERE YOU GET A BLINDFOLD. 379 00:13:24,104 --> 00:13:26,370 - NO, THE KIND THAT LEADS CHEERS, 380 00:13:26,372 --> 00:13:27,772 AND I'M GONNA TRY OUT. 381 00:13:27,774 --> 00:13:29,107 - HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND? 382 00:13:29,109 --> 00:13:31,309 - I HAVE TO FACE MY DEMONS, DARIA. 383 00:13:31,311 --> 00:13:32,810 MAYBE I'M NOT REALLY AN ARTIST. 384 00:13:32,812 --> 00:13:35,113 MAYBE THOSE INSIPID POM-POM WAVERS KNOW ME BETTER 385 00:13:35,115 --> 00:13:36,380 THAN I KNOW MYSELF. 386 00:13:36,382 --> 00:13:38,782 IF I'M REALLY MEANT TO CHEER, THAN SO BE IT. 387 00:13:38,784 --> 00:13:39,850 I'LL HANG UP MY EASEL 388 00:13:39,852 --> 00:13:41,819 AND DEVOTE MY LIFE TO PROVIDING PEP. 389 00:13:41,821 --> 00:13:43,154 - WHAT'S HAPPENED TO YOU? 390 00:13:43,156 --> 00:13:44,888 - COMPLETE LOSS OF CONFIDENCE. 391 00:13:44,890 --> 00:13:47,225 OH, AND BY THE WAY, SINCE THIS WAS YOUR IDEA, 392 00:13:47,227 --> 00:13:48,226 I BLAME YOU. 393 00:13:48,228 --> 00:13:49,560 - SORRY ABOUT THAT. 394 00:13:49,562 --> 00:13:51,862 BUT AT LEAST YOU KNOW I'M BEING AMPLY PUNISHED, 395 00:13:51,864 --> 00:13:54,798 SPENDING MY WEEKEND RESEARCHING FAUX FUR SWEATERS. 396 00:13:54,800 --> 00:13:57,669 - IT'S SMALL CONSOLATION, BUT I'LL TAKE IT. 397 00:13:57,671 --> 00:14:00,471 - OH, KEVIE, MY LIFE IS OVER. 398 00:14:00,473 --> 00:14:01,472 - MINE TOO, BABE. 399 00:14:01,474 --> 00:14:03,507 I'M THE Q.B. NO MORE. 400 00:14:03,509 --> 00:14:04,976 - THAT'S RIGHT. 401 00:14:04,978 --> 00:14:06,443 OH, NO! 402 00:14:06,445 --> 00:14:07,645 I HAVE TO BREAK UP WITH YOU 403 00:14:07,647 --> 00:14:09,080 BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT POPULAR ENOUGH 404 00:14:09,082 --> 00:14:10,548 TO GO OUT WITH ANYMORE. 405 00:14:10,550 --> 00:14:12,617 - UH, BABE, YOU'RE NOT POPULAR EITHER. 406 00:14:12,619 --> 00:14:14,952 - YOU MEAN WE CAN KEEP GOING OUT? 407 00:14:14,954 --> 00:14:15,953 - YEAH. 408 00:14:15,955 --> 00:14:19,556 - BABE. - BABE! 409 00:14:19,558 --> 00:14:20,858 - OH, KEVIE! 410 00:14:20,860 --> 00:14:24,261 [weeping] 411 00:14:24,263 --> 00:14:26,397 - LOOK, MAN, I KNOW YOU WERE JUST DOING YOUR ASSIGNMENT. 412 00:14:26,399 --> 00:14:27,698 I CAN'T MAKE ANY PROMISES, 413 00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:29,400 BUT I'LL TRY TO SET THINGS STRAIGHT WITH THE TEAM. 414 00:14:29,402 --> 00:14:30,501 - THANKS, BRO. 415 00:14:30,503 --> 00:14:32,036 - BRITTANY, I'M HEADING THE PEP RALLY 416 00:14:32,038 --> 00:14:33,337 AFTER SCHOOL TODAY. 417 00:14:33,339 --> 00:14:35,172 I'LL TRY TO EXPLAIN THINGS TO THE CHEERLEADERS 418 00:14:35,174 --> 00:14:36,173 BEFORE IT STARTS. 419 00:14:36,175 --> 00:14:37,909 - [weeping] 420 00:14:37,911 --> 00:14:38,843 - YOU'RE WELCOME. 421 00:14:41,314 --> 00:14:43,214 - HEY, GUYS, KEVIN DIDN'T MEAN IT. 422 00:14:48,020 --> 00:14:49,253 KEVIN, THE GUYS AND I THINK 423 00:14:49,255 --> 00:14:50,655 YOU SHOULD HAVE YOUR UNIFORM BACK. 424 00:14:50,657 --> 00:14:51,989 - THANKS. 425 00:14:51,991 --> 00:14:53,791 I'LL WEAR IT AT HOME WHEN I WATCH THE GAME ON TV. 426 00:14:53,793 --> 00:14:55,660 - NO, WE MEAN YOU'RE BACK ON THE TEAM. 427 00:14:55,662 --> 00:14:57,127 - I AM? COOL! 428 00:14:57,129 --> 00:14:58,829 - JUST DON'T MESS IT UP. - NO MESSING UP, MAN. 429 00:14:58,831 --> 00:14:59,997 - THANKS, MACK DADDY. 430 00:14:59,999 --> 00:15:02,333 - WHY DO I THINK I JUST SUCCEEDED AT FAILING? 431 00:15:02,335 --> 00:15:04,502 - RA RA RA! 432 00:15:04,504 --> 00:15:07,704 GO TEAM! 433 00:15:07,706 --> 00:15:09,206 OKAY, NOW IT'S YOUR TURN. 434 00:15:09,208 --> 00:15:10,541 GIVE IT EVERYTHING YOU'VE GOT. 435 00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:17,115 [together] RA RA RA! 436 00:15:17,117 --> 00:15:19,116 WE'RE GONNA BEAT YA! 437 00:15:21,621 --> 00:15:23,053 - WAY TO GO, BABE. 438 00:15:23,055 --> 00:15:24,388 - THANKS, BABE. 439 00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:27,491 - WHY IS SHE JUST STANDING THERE? 440 00:15:27,493 --> 00:15:28,660 - SHE MUST HAVE STAGE FRIGHT. 441 00:15:28,662 --> 00:15:31,529 - CHEER, CHEER, CHEER. 442 00:15:31,531 --> 00:15:32,830 YELL, YELL, YELL. 443 00:15:32,832 --> 00:15:34,632 WHO CARES WHO WINS? 444 00:15:34,634 --> 00:15:35,934 WE'RE ALL GOING TO HELL. 445 00:15:35,936 --> 00:15:37,068 - [gasps] 446 00:15:37,070 --> 00:15:38,402 - IF MY PEPPY DOESN'T WORK FOR YOU, 447 00:15:38,404 --> 00:15:39,704 I COULD ALWAYS TRY MY PERKY. 448 00:15:39,706 --> 00:15:41,238 - NO, THAT'S OKAY. 449 00:15:41,240 --> 00:15:42,239 - REALLY OKAY. 450 00:15:42,241 --> 00:15:43,473 - WHOO WHOO WHOO! 451 00:15:43,475 --> 00:15:44,809 YEAH! 452 00:15:44,811 --> 00:15:45,810 - GREAT. 453 00:15:45,812 --> 00:15:47,011 NOW WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO? 454 00:15:47,013 --> 00:15:48,846 - YOU COULD LET BRITTANY BACK ON THE SQUAD. 455 00:15:48,848 --> 00:15:52,183 - BUT SHE'S ALWAYS TALKING ABOUT THE STARVING REFEREES AND STUFF. 456 00:15:52,185 --> 00:15:54,018 - THAT WAS ONLY FOR A CLASS ASSIGNMENT. 457 00:15:54,020 --> 00:15:55,253 COME ON, LOOK AT HER. 458 00:15:55,255 --> 00:15:57,354 IS THAT THE FACE OF A THINKER. 459 00:16:04,263 --> 00:16:05,363 [together] GO... 460 00:16:05,365 --> 00:16:06,764 CHEERLEADERS! 461 00:16:06,766 --> 00:16:08,065 [all cheering] 462 00:16:08,067 --> 00:16:09,934 [dogs barking] 463 00:16:12,438 --> 00:16:14,438 - OKAY, WHERE'S YOUR EVIL TWIN? 464 00:16:14,440 --> 00:16:16,340 - THE ALIENS FINISHED THEIR EXPERIMENTS 465 00:16:16,342 --> 00:16:18,008 AND LET ME RETURN IN HER PLACE. 466 00:16:18,010 --> 00:16:19,243 - HOW WAS THE PROBE? 467 00:16:19,245 --> 00:16:21,212 - LESS INTRUSIVE THIS TIME. 468 00:16:21,214 --> 00:16:22,947 - BABE, YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE 469 00:16:22,949 --> 00:16:24,982 THE CHEERLEADER WHO AUDITIONED YESTERDAY. 470 00:16:24,984 --> 00:16:27,819 SHE GOT SCARED AND LOST ALL HER BOUNCITY-BOUNCE. 471 00:16:27,821 --> 00:16:29,687 - YOU HAD BOUNCITY-BOUNCE? 472 00:16:29,689 --> 00:16:31,388 - DROP IT, OR I'LL HAVE TO KILL YOU. 473 00:16:31,390 --> 00:16:34,425 - I'M TAKING QUINN TO THE FASHION EXTRAVAGANZA TOMORROW. 474 00:16:34,427 --> 00:16:36,561 WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I DON'T WANT YOU TO KILL ME? 475 00:16:36,563 --> 00:16:38,629 - HELLO, CLASS. 476 00:16:38,631 --> 00:16:41,498 TODAY, WE'RE GOING TO NOT DO ANYTHING. 477 00:16:41,500 --> 00:16:42,700 WHY BOTHER? 478 00:16:42,702 --> 00:16:44,669 WHO KNOWS WHAT DAMAGE I MIGHT DO THIS TIME? 479 00:16:44,671 --> 00:16:48,339 I JUST WANT TO SAY THAT... 480 00:16:48,341 --> 00:16:51,009 I'M A FAILURE AS A TEACHER, AS A MENTOR, 481 00:16:51,011 --> 00:16:53,544 NAY, AS A HUMAN BEING. 482 00:16:53,546 --> 00:16:55,013 DON'T WASTE ANOTHER MINUTE LISTENING 483 00:16:55,015 --> 00:16:56,514 TO MY MISGUIDED DRIVEL, 484 00:16:56,516 --> 00:16:58,782 FOR I REALIZE NOW THAT MY ONLY TALENT 485 00:16:58,784 --> 00:17:01,452 LIES IN LEADING YOUTH ASTRAY. 486 00:17:01,454 --> 00:17:03,788 PLEASE GO. 487 00:17:05,225 --> 00:17:07,025 - ALL RIGHT! 488 00:17:07,027 --> 00:17:09,760 - AND WHEN I WENT BACK TO GET MY NOTEBOOK, 489 00:17:09,762 --> 00:17:12,163 MR. O'NEILL WAS SLUMPED OVER HIS DESK 490 00:17:12,165 --> 00:17:14,532 SOBBING UNCONTROLLABLY INTO HIS SWEATER BELT. 491 00:17:14,534 --> 00:17:15,666 - WOW. 492 00:17:15,668 --> 00:17:17,368 IF WE WERE A DIFFERENT SORT OF YOUNG PEOPLE, 493 00:17:17,370 --> 00:17:19,403 WE MIGHT FEEL OBLIGATED TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS. 494 00:17:19,405 --> 00:17:21,705 - FORTUNATELY, WE DON'T HAVE ANY MOTIVATION. 495 00:17:21,707 --> 00:17:22,706 - YOU DO? 496 00:17:22,708 --> 00:17:23,808 - HUH? 497 00:17:25,711 --> 00:17:27,478 I CAN'T BELIEVE WE'RE DOING THIS. 498 00:17:27,480 --> 00:17:30,047 AND AREN'T TEACHERS' ADDRESSES CONFIDENTIAL? 499 00:17:30,049 --> 00:17:31,983 - NOT WHEN YOU'VE GOT THE WEB. 500 00:17:31,985 --> 00:17:33,651 ACTUALLY, I JUST LOOKED IN THE PHONE BOOK. 501 00:17:33,653 --> 00:17:36,187 BUT THE WEB SOUNDS SO COOL. 502 00:17:37,257 --> 00:17:39,657 - UM, HI, MR. O'NEILL. 503 00:17:39,659 --> 00:17:41,893 - DARIA? JANE? 504 00:17:50,136 --> 00:17:52,970 WOULD YOU GIRLS LIKE SOME ST. JOHN'S WORT TEA 505 00:17:52,972 --> 00:17:53,971 A GEM TINCTURE? 506 00:17:53,973 --> 00:17:55,306 - I CAN'T. I'M DRIVING. 507 00:17:55,308 --> 00:17:58,642 - UM, WE CAME BY BECAUSE WE WERE A LITTLE CONCERNED. 508 00:17:58,644 --> 00:18:00,111 - VERY CONCERNED. 509 00:18:00,113 --> 00:18:03,380 - WE KNOW YOU FEEL RESPONSIBLE BECAUSE SOME OF YOUR STUDENTS-- 510 00:18:03,382 --> 00:18:05,649 OR MORE SPECIFICALLY, ALL OF YOUR STUDENTS-- 511 00:18:05,651 --> 00:18:07,218 GOT DEPRESSED OVER THE ASSIGNMENT. 512 00:18:07,220 --> 00:18:08,686 - [crying] 513 00:18:08,688 --> 00:18:10,921 I'M A FAILURE. 514 00:18:10,923 --> 00:18:14,057 - BUT YOUR INTENTIONS WERE GOOD, AND NO ONE GOT HURT. 515 00:18:14,059 --> 00:18:16,560 - YOU SHOULDN'T BE SO HARD ON YOURSELF. 516 00:18:16,562 --> 00:18:18,696 THAT'S WHAT MISS LEE'S FOR. 517 00:18:18,698 --> 00:18:20,097 - HMM. 518 00:18:20,099 --> 00:18:22,466 GIRLS, I APPRECIATE YOUR CONCERN. 519 00:18:22,468 --> 00:18:24,535 BUT THE FACT THAT YOU HAD TO COME HERE AT ALL 520 00:18:24,537 --> 00:18:27,003 MAKES ME FEEL LIKE EVEN MORE OF A... 521 00:18:27,005 --> 00:18:28,506 FAILURE. 522 00:18:28,508 --> 00:18:32,175 - LOOK, YOU SET YOURSELF A TASK, AND YOU FAILED AT IT. 523 00:18:32,177 --> 00:18:34,244 THAT'S WHAT YOU ASKED US TO DO, REMEMBER? 524 00:18:34,246 --> 00:18:35,846 NOW FINISH THE ASSIGNMENT. 525 00:18:35,848 --> 00:18:37,915 ACCEPT THAT FAILING IS OKAY. 526 00:18:37,917 --> 00:18:40,017 - YEAH, BY FAILING, YOU SUCCEEDED. 527 00:18:40,019 --> 00:18:44,354 - WHAT KIND OF PSYCHOBABBLING, MUMBO-JUMBO IS THAT? 528 00:18:44,356 --> 00:18:46,691 OH, MY GOSH, JANE, I'M SO SORRY. 529 00:18:46,693 --> 00:18:47,791 - FOR WHAT? 530 00:18:47,793 --> 00:18:49,961 - YOU MEAN, YOU GIRLS' SELF-ESTEEM 531 00:18:49,963 --> 00:18:52,697 ISN'T PERMANENTLY SCARRED BY MY HORRIBLE ASSIGNMENT? 532 00:18:52,699 --> 00:18:54,298 - NO, NOT BY THAT. 533 00:18:54,300 --> 00:18:57,701 - THE STUDENTS TEACH THE TEACHER. 534 00:18:57,703 --> 00:18:59,736 - DARIA, JANE, YOU SHOULD CONSIDER CAREERS 535 00:18:59,738 --> 00:19:00,972 IN MOTIVATIONAL SPEAKING. 536 00:19:00,974 --> 00:19:02,673 - ONLY IF I DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING. 537 00:19:02,675 --> 00:19:05,409 - YOU'VE BROUGHT THE SUN BACK INTO MY LIFE. 538 00:19:05,411 --> 00:19:06,944 - HOW CAN I EVER REPAY YOU? 539 00:19:06,946 --> 00:19:09,146 - WELL, NOW THAT YOU MENTION IT. 540 00:19:12,118 --> 00:19:14,085 - DO YOU HAVE TO WALK SO CLOSE TO ME 541 00:19:14,087 --> 00:19:15,920 AND IN THOSE SHOES? 542 00:19:15,922 --> 00:19:17,788 - NOW, QUINN, YOU KNOW IT'S MY JOB 543 00:19:17,790 --> 00:19:19,223 TO MONITOR YOUR SPENDING TODAY. 544 00:19:19,225 --> 00:19:21,525 LET'S MAKE IT AN ADVENTURE IN MODERATION. 545 00:19:21,527 --> 00:19:22,993 - [groans] 546 00:19:22,995 --> 00:19:25,830 - I CAN'T BELIEVE QUINN TRIED TO PASS MR. O'NEILL OFF 547 00:19:25,832 --> 00:19:27,798 AS A PROFESSIONAL FASHION CONSULTANT. 548 00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:30,434 - YEAH, WHAT WAS SHE THINKING? 549 00:19:30,436 --> 00:19:31,568 - POOR QUINN. 550 00:19:31,570 --> 00:19:32,937 IT MUST BE SO HUMILIATING 551 00:19:32,939 --> 00:19:34,571 TO BE SEEN IN A MALL WITH YOUR TEACHER 552 00:19:34,573 --> 00:19:36,006 IN FRONT OF ALL YOUR FRIENDS. 553 00:19:36,008 --> 00:19:37,074 - I KNOW. 554 00:19:37,076 --> 00:19:38,409 COME ON, WE DON'T WANT TO LOSE THEM. 555 00:19:45,485 --> 00:19:47,418 - ♪ LA-LA, LA, LA-LA ♪ 556 00:19:47,420 --> 00:19:55,359 ♪ ♪ 557 00:20:00,332 --> 00:20:01,566 ♪ LA, LA, LA ♪ 558 00:20:01,568 --> 00:20:05,069 ♪ ♪ 559 00:20:05,071 --> 00:20:06,303 ♪ LA, LA, LA ♪ 560 00:20:06,305 --> 00:20:09,874 ♪ ♪ 561 00:20:09,876 --> 00:20:11,075 ♪ LA, LA, LA ♪ 562 00:20:11,077 --> 00:20:19,016 ♪ ♪ 563 00:20:21,120 --> 00:20:23,588 ♪ LA-LA, LA, LA-LA ♪ 564 00:20:23,590 --> 00:20:25,922 ♪ ♪ 565 00:20:25,924 --> 00:20:27,224 ♪ LA-LA, LA, LA-LA ♪