1 00:00:53,929 --> 00:00:56,890 W-o-r-k. 2 00:01:03,564 --> 00:01:07,733 Today we're going to share what our parents do for... 3 00:01:07,734 --> 00:01:08,569 Work! 4 00:01:08,570 --> 00:01:10,987 Work! 5 00:01:10,988 --> 00:01:12,822 - My mommy is a doctor. 6 00:01:12,823 --> 00:01:15,283 - My daddy is a truck driver. 7 00:01:15,284 --> 00:01:17,034 - My mom's a teacher. 8 00:01:17,035 --> 00:01:18,036 - And your dad? 9 00:01:19,413 --> 00:01:20,497 - My dad... 10 00:01:25,460 --> 00:01:27,169 - A liar? 11 00:01:27,170 --> 00:01:30,464 Oh, I'm sure you don't mean a liar. 12 00:01:30,465 --> 00:01:32,800 - Well, he wears a suit and goes to court 13 00:01:32,801 --> 00:01:34,302 and talks to the judge. 14 00:01:34,303 --> 00:01:36,554 Oh! Oh! I see. 15 00:01:36,555 --> 00:01:38,514 You mean he's a lawyer. 16 00:01:45,647 --> 00:01:47,481 - Hey, Fletcher. - How'd it go in there? 17 00:01:47,482 --> 00:01:49,692 - Just another victory for the wrongly accused. 18 00:01:49,693 --> 00:01:50,693 - Yeah right. 19 00:01:51,362 --> 00:01:53,321 - Mr. Reede, great job sir. - Do you want your coat back? 20 00:01:53,322 --> 00:01:56,073 - No, I'm sure you'll be needing it again and again. 21 00:01:56,074 --> 00:01:57,408 - Mr. Reede, do you have a moment? 22 00:01:57,409 --> 00:01:59,702 - I'm sorry, I'm very late. - It's my day to be with my son. 23 00:01:59,703 --> 00:02:01,329 - A couple of reporters wanna talk to you 24 00:02:01,330 --> 00:02:02,788 about your big win today. 25 00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:04,874 - Oh, yeah? How's my hair? 26 00:02:04,875 --> 00:02:06,168 - Fabulous. You look great. 27 00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:23,143 - What time is it? 28 00:02:24,186 --> 00:02:27,356 - I'm sure your dad just got held up in court again. 29 00:02:34,404 --> 00:02:35,863 - Dad! 30 00:02:35,864 --> 00:02:37,281 - Maximilian! 31 00:02:42,120 --> 00:02:44,121 How you doing, creep? 32 00:02:46,708 --> 00:02:50,252 - Me too, except my arm has really been bothering me lately. 33 00:02:50,253 --> 00:02:52,254 Oh, no, dad! 34 00:02:52,255 --> 00:02:53,506 - Oh, yeah! 35 00:02:53,507 --> 00:02:55,384 It's becoming a claw! 36 00:03:00,305 --> 00:03:03,057 Nothing can stop the claw! 37 00:03:05,936 --> 00:03:10,189 Run, boy! Run! Save yourself! 38 00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:12,692 - Do the claw to mom, dad! Do the claw to mom! 39 00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:16,487 - Uh-oh! You found the claw's only weakness. 40 00:03:16,488 --> 00:03:19,573 Sub-zero temperatures! 41 00:03:20,867 --> 00:03:23,411 - So, did you have any trouble finding the place? 42 00:03:23,412 --> 00:03:26,872 - Okay, I'm late. I'm sorry. I ran out of gas. 43 00:03:26,873 --> 00:03:30,084 The Gauge is broken or something. 44 00:03:30,085 --> 00:03:30,919 Rough neighborhood, too. 45 00:03:30,920 --> 00:03:33,379 It's a good thing I was wearing neutral gang colors. 46 00:03:33,380 --> 00:03:36,090 I might've had to pull out my nine and bust a cap. 47 00:03:36,091 --> 00:03:39,552 J“ with my mind on my money and my money on my mind j“ 48 00:03:39,553 --> 00:03:41,178 - well, they would never hurt you, Fletcher, 49 00:03:41,179 --> 00:03:42,763 you're their lawyer. 50 00:03:42,764 --> 00:03:46,434 - Oh! That was below the belt. Try keep the gloves up. 51 00:03:46,435 --> 00:03:48,686 - Mom, dad's taking me to see wrestling! 52 00:03:48,687 --> 00:03:50,187 Fletcher! 53 00:03:50,188 --> 00:03:51,647 Audrey! 54 00:03:51,648 --> 00:03:53,774 - Why do you have to take him to see that stuff? 55 00:03:53,775 --> 00:03:55,151 It's very violent. 56 00:03:55,152 --> 00:03:59,321 The boy must grow to be a warrior. 57 00:03:59,322 --> 00:04:01,365 Who better to guide him than Rick rude 58 00:04:01,366 --> 00:04:04,702 and Randy "macho-man" savage in the cage of death? 59 00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:08,456 Good! 60 00:04:08,457 --> 00:04:09,666 Jerry, how's it going? 61 00:04:10,584 --> 00:04:13,294 - Hey, gipper! Look at you. 62 00:04:13,295 --> 00:04:15,504 You look like you grow by the minute! 63 00:04:15,505 --> 00:04:16,839 - Fletcher, pleasure to see you. 64 00:04:16,840 --> 00:04:17,674 - Hey. 65 00:04:17,675 --> 00:04:18,925 - Hi, honey! 66 00:04:20,844 --> 00:04:25,807 Wow, that was a nice image. Deleted. 67 00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:27,641 - I have some more boxes for you. 68 00:04:27,642 --> 00:04:28,934 - Oh! You're an angel. 69 00:04:28,935 --> 00:04:30,519 - Boxes? - Yeah. 70 00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:32,146 Remember? I told you a few weeks ago. 71 00:04:32,147 --> 00:04:33,814 Jerry's moving to Boston on Friday. 72 00:04:33,815 --> 00:04:38,861 - Oh, right! The job, the thing... what do you do again? 73 00:04:38,862 --> 00:04:39,987 - Hospital administrator. 74 00:04:39,988 --> 00:04:41,280 - Right! Right! 75 00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:43,032 - Well, the boxes are in my car. 76 00:04:43,033 --> 00:04:44,784 - Oh, those can wait. 77 00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:47,204 I made this young man a promise, didn't I? 78 00:04:48,830 --> 00:04:50,164 Got time to throw a few? 79 00:04:50,165 --> 00:04:50,999 - Sure! 80 00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:53,626 Come on, then! 81 00:04:53,627 --> 00:04:55,169 - I forgot the boyfriend was moving. 82 00:04:55,170 --> 00:04:59,173 - Jerry! His name is Jerry! - And yes, he's moving. 83 00:04:59,174 --> 00:05:01,217 - I'm sorry, I hated him a lot less 84 00:05:01,218 --> 00:05:04,011 than your other boyfriends, it wasn't serious, was it? 85 00:05:04,012 --> 00:05:05,930 - Semi-serious, yes. 86 00:05:05,931 --> 00:05:10,018 You guys aren't, you know... 87 00:05:13,021 --> 00:05:15,439 - I've been dating him for seven months. What do you think? 88 00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:17,024 - Really? Ew! 89 00:05:17,025 --> 00:05:19,026 I was hoping after being married to me 90 00:05:19,027 --> 00:05:20,152 you'd have no strength left. 91 00:05:20,153 --> 00:05:22,238 - Well, you have to remember that when we were married, 92 00:05:22,239 --> 00:05:24,490 I wasn't having sex nearly as often as you were? 93 00:05:24,491 --> 00:05:25,991 - Ouch! 94 00:05:25,992 --> 00:05:27,993 And the ref takes a point away. 95 00:05:27,994 --> 00:05:29,787 - Yeah. - Oh! Oh! And out! 96 00:05:29,788 --> 00:05:30,913 - Yeah! Whoo! 97 00:05:30,914 --> 00:05:32,082 - Max is gonna miss him. 98 00:05:33,792 --> 00:05:34,792 - I'll be here. 99 00:05:35,710 --> 00:05:36,710 Ready? 100 00:05:37,921 --> 00:05:39,296 Yeah! 101 00:05:39,297 --> 00:05:40,215 Play ball. 102 00:05:40,216 --> 00:05:42,092 - Max, come on. We've gotta go. 103 00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:45,427 - Dad, are we really going to wrestling? 104 00:05:45,428 --> 00:05:47,012 - Absolutely, Max factor. 105 00:05:47,013 --> 00:05:49,431 We just have to stop by the office for a minute. 106 00:05:49,432 --> 00:05:51,058 - Excuse me, sir. Any spare change? 107 00:05:51,059 --> 00:05:52,769 - Oh, I'm sorry. I'm all out. 108 00:05:53,854 --> 00:05:54,854 - I can't do it. 109 00:05:55,564 --> 00:05:57,773 - Fred, it's your duty to present 110 00:05:57,774 --> 00:05:59,984 the strongest case possible. 111 00:05:59,985 --> 00:06:02,570 - The strongest case possible consistent with the truth. 112 00:06:02,571 --> 00:06:04,530 - Will you let the judge decide what's true? 113 00:06:04,531 --> 00:06:08,409 That's what he gets paid for. You get paid to win. 114 00:06:08,410 --> 00:06:10,995 - If you insist that I take it to trial, 115 00:06:10,996 --> 00:06:14,832 I will represent Mrs. Cole aggressively and ethically, 116 00:06:14,833 --> 00:06:17,585 but, Miranda, I won't lie. 117 00:06:19,004 --> 00:06:22,047 - Then we'll just have to find someone who will. 118 00:06:23,925 --> 00:06:26,594 - 215t floor. Men's wear. 119 00:06:31,182 --> 00:06:32,558 - Hi, Mr. Reede! 120 00:06:32,559 --> 00:06:34,102 - Whoa! Hey. 121 00:06:35,270 --> 00:06:36,812 Did you do something to your hair? 122 00:06:36,813 --> 00:06:39,273 It's a bit extreme, isn't it? 123 00:06:39,274 --> 00:06:43,152 - No! I mean that's... that's the thing nowadays, right? 124 00:06:43,153 --> 00:06:45,571 - Well, he said it would accent my facial features. 125 00:06:45,572 --> 00:06:46,489 - Well, that's what it does! 126 00:06:46,490 --> 00:06:48,575 It completely accents your facial features. 127 00:06:49,784 --> 00:06:53,288 We're just gonna go to my office now. 128 00:06:56,166 --> 00:06:57,207 - Hey, Fletcher. 129 00:06:57,208 --> 00:06:59,084 - Hey, Pete. You losing a little weight? 130 00:06:59,085 --> 00:07:00,878 - I don't know. Maybe. 131 00:07:00,879 --> 00:07:03,589 - Looks and personality. - A double-threat guy. 132 00:07:03,590 --> 00:07:06,008 - Hey, Mr. Reede. - Hey, man. 133 00:07:06,009 --> 00:07:07,051 - It's Randy. 134 00:07:07,052 --> 00:07:08,677 - Yeah, I know. 135 00:07:08,678 --> 00:07:10,930 - Taking lunch orders Mr. Reede. Anything? 136 00:07:10,931 --> 00:07:12,182 - No, thanks. 137 00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:17,061 I had so much for breakfast, I'm just about ready to pop. 138 00:07:17,062 --> 00:07:18,938 I mean, I'm full. 139 00:07:20,357 --> 00:07:21,398 Great. 140 00:07:25,320 --> 00:07:26,528 - Max! 141 00:07:26,529 --> 00:07:28,155 - Hi, Greta. 142 00:07:28,156 --> 00:07:29,907 - Hey, what's new? 143 00:07:29,908 --> 00:07:31,408 - Well, it's my birthday's tomorrow, 144 00:07:31,409 --> 00:07:32,743 and we're having a party and everything. 145 00:07:32,744 --> 00:07:34,828 - Wow! I am sure that your daddy 146 00:07:34,829 --> 00:07:36,789 has got you something wonderful. 147 00:07:37,874 --> 00:07:41,293 Yeah! You bet! 148 00:07:41,294 --> 00:07:42,962 Listen, kiddo, why don't you go 149 00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:44,296 play in my office for a minute? 150 00:07:44,297 --> 00:07:46,548 Sue somebody for everything they've got. 151 00:07:46,549 --> 00:07:49,551 Maybe you can send a fax to one of your girlfriends. 152 00:07:49,552 --> 00:07:50,803 Hey, sorry. 153 00:07:51,681 --> 00:07:54,515 Damn it! I completely forgot. 154 00:07:54,516 --> 00:07:55,725 - Oh. What a surprise? 155 00:07:56,810 --> 00:07:59,728 - You are a Saint. I should buy you a gift. 156 00:07:59,729 --> 00:08:01,271 - You did. 157 00:08:01,272 --> 00:08:03,190 - I always do the classy thing. Any calls? 158 00:08:03,191 --> 00:08:05,526 - Judge rollins' clerk he needs your filing. 159 00:08:05,527 --> 00:08:06,652 - Tell him it's in the mail. 160 00:08:06,653 --> 00:08:08,362 - Right, you'll do it next week. 161 00:08:08,363 --> 00:08:11,907 Mr. McKinley phoned to confirm your meeting tomorrow. 162 00:08:11,908 --> 00:08:14,827 - Strep throat. No, some kind of virus, what's going around? 163 00:08:14,828 --> 00:08:15,745 - Asian flu? 164 00:08:15,746 --> 00:08:16,954 - Good one. 165 00:08:16,955 --> 00:08:18,330 - And your mother called. 166 00:08:18,331 --> 00:08:19,748 - I'm on vacation. 167 00:08:19,749 --> 00:08:20,874 - It's your fifth week. 168 00:08:20,875 --> 00:08:22,251 - Snowed in, phones are down. 169 00:08:22,252 --> 00:08:23,836 - Break mother's heart. Done. 170 00:08:23,837 --> 00:08:26,380 Now, that's it, except Miranda's looking for you. 171 00:08:27,966 --> 00:08:30,050 - How much ass do I have to kiss 172 00:08:30,051 --> 00:08:32,428 to make partner in this damn place? 173 00:08:32,429 --> 00:08:35,472 Tell her I broke my leg and had to be shot. 174 00:08:35,473 --> 00:08:37,808 - Why don't you tell her yourself? 175 00:08:37,809 --> 00:08:41,270 - And then send out a notice of judgment on my win today! 176 00:08:41,271 --> 00:08:42,397 - I'll get right on it. 177 00:08:43,398 --> 00:08:48,361 - Miranda! Hey, I didn't see you. You look beautiful today. 178 00:08:49,404 --> 00:08:51,739 Here! I bought you a gift. 179 00:08:51,740 --> 00:08:56,493 - Oh! Thanks. I heard about your victory, congratulations. 180 00:08:56,494 --> 00:08:58,078 You know, you're making quite an impression 181 00:08:58,079 --> 00:08:59,456 on the partnership committee. 182 00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:03,876 - Oh, that's right! You folks are meeting again soon. 183 00:09:03,877 --> 00:09:05,335 I've just been keeping myself so busy, 184 00:09:05,336 --> 00:09:07,964 I haven't even thought about it. 185 00:09:09,716 --> 00:09:12,426 Anyway, I have a client in my office. 186 00:09:12,427 --> 00:09:14,094 Better not keep him waiting. 187 00:09:14,095 --> 00:09:15,345 - Actually, Fletcher, 188 00:09:15,346 --> 00:09:17,474 something rather important has just come up. 189 00:09:18,475 --> 00:09:20,768 You're not busy tonight, are you? 190 00:09:28,526 --> 00:09:29,985 - We're not going, are we? 191 00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:46,627 - Audrey, you know how there are moments in life 192 00:09:46,628 --> 00:09:47,921 that you know are critical. 193 00:09:49,005 --> 00:09:50,964 And choices that have to be made, 194 00:09:50,965 --> 00:09:53,426 upon which all one's future happiness will depend? 195 00:09:54,511 --> 00:09:56,179 Well, this is one of those moments. 196 00:09:58,306 --> 00:10:00,057 - What are you trying to say? 197 00:10:01,935 --> 00:10:02,935 - Will you marry me? 198 00:10:08,399 --> 00:10:09,483 - You're moving. - I know. 199 00:10:09,484 --> 00:10:10,401 I'm moving to Boston, but I want 200 00:10:10,402 --> 00:10:12,194 you and Max to come with me. 201 00:10:12,195 --> 00:10:14,238 Audrey, I've been giving this a lot of thought. 202 00:10:14,239 --> 00:10:15,739 And you know I'm not prone to wild, 203 00:10:15,740 --> 00:10:18,617 spontaneous flights of romantic fancy. 204 00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:19,743 But the thought of you and I together 205 00:10:19,744 --> 00:10:21,995 just makes too much sense to ignore. 206 00:10:21,996 --> 00:10:23,831 Now, I'm ready, I think you're ready, 207 00:10:23,832 --> 00:10:28,252 I love Max, you love Max, it's right, it fits. 208 00:10:28,253 --> 00:10:30,129 So what do you say? 209 00:10:48,022 --> 00:10:51,525 - Hey, creepy. Happy birthday. 210 00:10:51,526 --> 00:10:53,610 How old are you now, 22, 23? 211 00:10:53,611 --> 00:10:55,571 - I'm five, dad. 212 00:10:57,073 --> 00:10:59,867 Return the beer keg. 213 00:10:59,868 --> 00:11:03,036 Cancel the dancing girls. 214 00:11:04,539 --> 00:11:06,248 I don't know what I'm gonna do. 215 00:11:06,249 --> 00:11:09,042 I feel completely unprepared for this. 216 00:11:09,043 --> 00:11:11,671 You see, I bought you a present, but last night, 217 00:11:13,298 --> 00:11:14,590 I accidentally swallowed it. 218 00:11:14,591 --> 00:11:17,009 - Dad, it's in your belly! 219 00:11:17,010 --> 00:11:18,010 - Scalpel. 220 00:11:18,761 --> 00:11:21,221 I hope it's not partially digested! 221 00:11:21,222 --> 00:11:23,307 Look out! 222 00:11:25,143 --> 00:11:26,727 - What is it? 223 00:11:26,728 --> 00:11:29,813 - It's a surprise. 224 00:11:29,814 --> 00:11:31,608 All right, it's a pony. Just open it! 225 00:11:32,650 --> 00:11:35,110 I'm gonna help, 'cause I can't stand it! 226 00:11:37,989 --> 00:11:41,700 - Baseball stuff! 227 00:11:43,161 --> 00:11:45,329 Can we play? I'll be nomo. 228 00:11:45,330 --> 00:11:47,998 You can be Jose canseco. Can we play dad? Can we play? 229 00:11:47,999 --> 00:11:49,666 - Absolutely. 230 00:11:50,668 --> 00:11:53,462 Right after your party tonight, 231 00:11:53,463 --> 00:11:55,381 we'll do it, you and me. 232 00:11:57,258 --> 00:12:00,510 I just have to really concentrate on this right now. 233 00:12:27,956 --> 00:12:29,498 Happy birthday. 234 00:12:29,499 --> 00:12:30,707 - Thanks, mom. 235 00:12:30,708 --> 00:12:33,252 Happy birthday, Max! 236 00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:38,006 One, two, three, four, five, and one for good luck! 237 00:12:38,007 --> 00:12:39,633 - He struck the child. Did you see that? 238 00:12:39,634 --> 00:12:41,677 - Look at what dad got me! 239 00:12:41,678 --> 00:12:42,761 - Whoa! 240 00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:44,596 Great! 241 00:12:44,597 --> 00:12:46,890 Hey, you know what, I have my glove in the car. 242 00:12:46,891 --> 00:12:48,141 Maybe we can stop at the park 243 00:12:48,142 --> 00:12:50,060 on the way home and play catch. 244 00:12:50,061 --> 00:12:51,687 And then tonight we can rub oil in it 245 00:12:51,688 --> 00:12:53,397 and wrap a big rubber band around it. 246 00:12:53,398 --> 00:12:56,858 It'll be great. Hey, great gift, dad! 247 00:12:56,859 --> 00:12:58,485 - Thanks, son. 248 00:12:58,486 --> 00:13:00,988 I'm so glad my gift could bring those two together. 249 00:13:00,989 --> 00:13:03,324 My plan to phase myself out is almost complete. 250 00:13:05,201 --> 00:13:07,327 - Something's come up, and we need to talk. 251 00:13:07,328 --> 00:13:10,038 - Come on, mom. I wanna go play! 252 00:13:10,039 --> 00:13:11,581 - And, actually, it's kind of important, 253 00:13:11,582 --> 00:13:13,250 so maybe we could talk tonight? 254 00:13:13,251 --> 00:13:14,543 - Tonight? 255 00:13:14,544 --> 00:13:17,087 - Yes. Max's birthday party. 256 00:13:17,088 --> 00:13:19,673 - Oh! Yeah. Sure, of course. 257 00:13:19,674 --> 00:13:21,466 We'll talk then. Great! 258 00:13:23,761 --> 00:13:25,429 Maximus! I'm outta here. 259 00:13:25,430 --> 00:13:26,471 - Bye, dad. 260 00:13:26,472 --> 00:13:28,433 - Jerry, enjoy my wife. 261 00:13:44,490 --> 00:13:45,490 - Well, 262 00:13:46,451 --> 00:13:49,786 this is good, this is really smart. 263 00:13:49,787 --> 00:13:50,621 - Thank you. 264 00:13:50,622 --> 00:13:53,874 - Only, well, it's not true, I mean, 265 00:13:53,875 --> 00:13:56,085 does that present a problem? 266 00:13:58,004 --> 00:13:59,921 - Mrs. Cole, the only problem here 267 00:13:59,922 --> 00:14:02,758 is that after you've provided years of faithful service 268 00:14:02,759 --> 00:14:05,093 and loving support of raising his children... 269 00:14:05,094 --> 00:14:06,094 They are his? 270 00:14:07,013 --> 00:14:09,724 - Oh, yeah, yeah. One for sure. 271 00:14:11,642 --> 00:14:14,436 - After all that, your husband want to denying you 272 00:14:14,437 --> 00:14:15,896 a fair share of the marital assets, 273 00:14:15,897 --> 00:14:17,939 based on one single act of indiscretion. 274 00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:18,775 - Seven. 275 00:14:18,775 --> 00:14:19,650 - Pardon me? 276 00:14:19,651 --> 00:14:22,612 - Seven single acts of indiscretion. 277 00:14:23,946 --> 00:14:25,989 - Seven acts of indiscretion, 278 00:14:25,990 --> 00:14:28,325 only one of which he has any evidence of, 279 00:14:28,326 --> 00:14:32,162 and all of which he himself is responsible for. 280 00:14:32,163 --> 00:14:33,246 - He is? 281 00:14:33,247 --> 00:14:34,332 - Mrs. Cole. 282 00:14:35,291 --> 00:14:37,042 You're the victim here. 283 00:14:37,043 --> 00:14:39,252 The wife of a cold, distant workaholic. 284 00:14:39,253 --> 00:14:42,005 Starved for affection. Driven into the arms of another man! 285 00:14:42,006 --> 00:14:44,007 - Seven. - Yeah. Whatever! 286 00:14:44,008 --> 00:14:46,635 You're not trying to denying him what is rightfully his. 287 00:14:46,636 --> 00:14:49,179 All you're insisting on is what is rightfully yours. 288 00:14:49,180 --> 00:14:53,058 - Yeah - and maybe a fraction more. 289 00:14:53,059 --> 00:14:55,560 I think you're bending over backwards. 290 00:14:57,230 --> 00:15:00,690 Well, I did offer to give him joint custody of the kids. 291 00:15:00,691 --> 00:15:03,860 He is, after all, a wonderful father. 292 00:15:03,861 --> 00:15:05,238 - And how does he repay you? 293 00:15:06,572 --> 00:15:09,408 By dragging you through a painful litigation process! 294 00:15:09,409 --> 00:15:13,370 No! No! No! No! This can't happen! 295 00:15:13,371 --> 00:15:14,704 With all due respect, 296 00:15:14,705 --> 00:15:16,832 this isn't about you and Mr. Cole anymore. 297 00:15:16,833 --> 00:15:18,750 This is about all women. 298 00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:20,669 Where would Tina Turner be right now, 299 00:15:20,670 --> 00:15:21,920 if she'd rolled over and said, 300 00:15:21,921 --> 00:15:25,632 "hit me again, ike, and put some stank on it." 301 00:15:25,633 --> 00:15:28,009 Rolling on the river, that's where she'd be. 302 00:15:28,010 --> 00:15:29,761 But she's beyond thunder dome, 303 00:15:29,762 --> 00:15:32,305 because she decided to send a message. 304 00:15:32,306 --> 00:15:34,391 Wake up, sisters! 305 00:15:34,392 --> 00:15:35,392 There's no 306 00:15:37,145 --> 00:15:40,981 such thing as a weaker sex! 307 00:15:40,982 --> 00:15:43,108 Oh! 308 00:15:43,109 --> 00:15:46,153 You know what? You're right, Mr. Reede. 309 00:15:46,154 --> 00:15:48,989 I am tired of getting kicked around! 310 00:15:48,990 --> 00:15:50,241 - Good for you! 311 00:15:51,617 --> 00:15:53,201 - Thank you, 312 00:15:53,202 --> 00:15:55,495 I am so grateful 313 00:15:55,496 --> 00:15:58,957 to have an attorney I can trust. 314 00:16:05,590 --> 00:16:07,507 - Oh, you are good. 315 00:16:07,508 --> 00:16:10,761 You are very, very good. 316 00:16:12,722 --> 00:16:14,389 You know, the Cole case is worth a 317 00:16:14,390 --> 00:16:16,516 truckload of money to this firm. 318 00:16:16,517 --> 00:16:19,769 If you win, I guarantee you'll make partner. 319 00:16:19,770 --> 00:16:20,770 - Oh. 320 00:16:22,190 --> 00:16:23,190 - In fact, 321 00:16:24,859 --> 00:16:26,902 how would you like to make 322 00:16:26,903 --> 00:16:28,196 a partner right now? 323 00:16:29,906 --> 00:16:32,074 - Oh, I don't know, I mean, I should... 324 00:16:39,582 --> 00:16:43,084 F happy, happy, happy, happy, happy, happy, happy j“ 325 00:16:43,085 --> 00:16:46,755 j“ I'm so happy today j“ 326 00:16:46,756 --> 00:16:48,965 j“ I live in the u.S.A j“ 327 00:16:48,966 --> 00:16:51,676 - so, honey, have you... 328 00:16:51,677 --> 00:16:54,388 Have you thought about, you know, what we talked about? 329 00:16:55,264 --> 00:16:56,140 - Yeah. - Great. 330 00:16:56,141 --> 00:16:57,557 - I can't go. 331 00:16:57,558 --> 00:16:59,309 - What? Why not? 332 00:16:59,310 --> 00:17:01,186 - Well, because of Max. 333 00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:03,104 - Oh, but he'll love it there. 334 00:17:03,105 --> 00:17:05,315 I'm gonna take him to Fenway park. 335 00:17:05,316 --> 00:17:07,484 There's hiking and camping and... 336 00:17:07,485 --> 00:17:11,446 - Well, really, it's Fletcher. 337 00:17:11,447 --> 00:17:13,990 - Fletcher? I mean, come on, honey. 338 00:17:13,991 --> 00:17:16,409 He wouldn't even come over unless you reminded him. 339 00:17:16,410 --> 00:17:19,287 - Well, I know, but when he does come over, Max is so happy. 340 00:17:19,288 --> 00:17:21,706 I mean, it's like they have their own little world together. 341 00:17:21,707 --> 00:17:22,916 - The gipper and I have that, too! 342 00:17:22,917 --> 00:17:24,669 - Well, I know, but it's different. 343 00:17:25,628 --> 00:17:26,546 - How? 344 00:17:26,546 --> 00:17:27,546 - Well... 345 00:17:29,423 --> 00:17:31,633 He does the claw. 346 00:17:31,634 --> 00:17:32,552 - The what? 347 00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:33,552 - The claw. 348 00:17:34,303 --> 00:17:35,846 You know, it's like this... 349 00:17:37,473 --> 00:17:39,683 I don't... 350 00:17:39,684 --> 00:17:41,811 Run for your life. It's the claw! The claw! 351 00:17:49,360 --> 00:17:51,027 Well, I can't really do it that good. 352 00:17:51,028 --> 00:17:52,028 Anyway, that's not the point. 353 00:17:52,029 --> 00:17:53,238 The point is... 354 00:17:54,074 --> 00:17:55,282 If they're 3,000 miles apart, 355 00:17:55,283 --> 00:17:56,950 they'll never gonna see each other. 356 00:17:56,951 --> 00:17:58,791 I mean, Fletcher is never gonna come to Boston. 357 00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:03,249 Audrey? 358 00:18:03,250 --> 00:18:06,001 - Fletcher! Fletcher! Where are you? We are waiting for you. 359 00:18:06,002 --> 00:18:08,920 Max won't cut the cake until you get here. 360 00:18:08,921 --> 00:18:10,839 - Oh, man! 361 00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:12,592 Actually, something has come up. 362 00:18:13,634 --> 00:18:15,885 I've got this problem on a new case! 363 00:18:15,886 --> 00:18:16,721 - What happened? 364 00:18:16,721 --> 00:18:17,555 - Nothing! 365 00:18:17,556 --> 00:18:19,931 I stubbed my toe on the desk! 366 00:18:19,932 --> 00:18:23,643 Listen, I'm really sorry, but I just can't make it. 367 00:18:23,644 --> 00:18:26,688 The boss is really riding me. 368 00:18:26,689 --> 00:18:30,025 - Oh, Fletcher, it's his birthday! 369 00:18:30,026 --> 00:18:33,820 - I know, I know. I'll make it up to him, I promise. 370 00:18:33,821 --> 00:18:35,614 I'll pick him up from school tomorrow, okay. 371 00:18:35,615 --> 00:18:36,781 - You're gonna pick him up? 372 00:18:36,782 --> 00:18:37,991 - Yes! Yes! 373 00:18:37,992 --> 00:18:39,034 - All right, well, hold on a minute. 374 00:18:39,035 --> 00:18:41,077 I'll get him, you can say, "happy birthday". 375 00:18:41,078 --> 00:18:44,247 No! Gotta go! Good-bye. 376 00:18:46,917 --> 00:18:51,046 J“ happy birthday to you j“ 377 00:18:51,047 --> 00:18:56,010 j“ happy birthday, dear Max j“ 378 00:18:56,344 --> 00:18:59,639 j“ happy birthday to you j“ 379 00:19:03,225 --> 00:19:05,811 - Okay, birthday boy. Make a wish. 380 00:19:08,898 --> 00:19:12,233 Come on, Max. It can be anything you want. 381 00:19:12,234 --> 00:19:14,486 Anything in the whole world. 382 00:19:29,168 --> 00:19:30,168 Max, 383 00:19:31,837 --> 00:19:35,340 your father is sorry, he had to work. 384 00:19:35,341 --> 00:19:37,175 - He said he was gonna be here. He promised. 385 00:19:37,176 --> 00:19:40,261 - I know, I know, but he promises 386 00:19:40,262 --> 00:19:43,640 that he is gonna see you tomorrow, okay. 387 00:19:43,641 --> 00:19:46,143 He's gonna pick you up from school. All right? 388 00:19:49,230 --> 00:19:50,230 So, come on. 389 00:19:51,816 --> 00:19:52,816 Make a wish. 390 00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:08,541 - I wish that for only one day, dad couldn't tell a lie. 391 00:20:37,903 --> 00:20:39,697 - That was incredible. 392 00:20:41,824 --> 00:20:45,285 Was it good for you? 393 00:20:45,286 --> 00:20:46,369 - I've had better. 394 00:20:55,129 --> 00:20:56,796 "I've had better?" 395 00:21:00,176 --> 00:21:01,635 "I've had better?" 396 00:21:06,891 --> 00:21:10,810 "I've had better." 397 00:21:35,336 --> 00:21:36,544 - New in the building? 398 00:21:36,545 --> 00:21:38,129 - Yeah, I just moved in Monday. 399 00:21:38,130 --> 00:21:41,257 - Oh! You like it so far? 400 00:21:41,258 --> 00:21:42,926 - Everybody's been real nice. 401 00:21:42,927 --> 00:21:45,970 - Well, that's because you have big jugs. 402 00:21:45,971 --> 00:21:48,139 I mean, your boobs are huge. 403 00:21:48,140 --> 00:21:51,769 I mean, I want to squeeze them. 404 00:21:52,978 --> 00:21:53,978 Mama. 405 00:22:06,158 --> 00:22:07,575 - Any change, mister? 406 00:22:07,576 --> 00:22:08,785 - Absolutely. 407 00:22:08,786 --> 00:22:09,869 - Could you spare some? 408 00:22:09,870 --> 00:22:11,287 - Yes, I could. 409 00:22:11,288 --> 00:22:12,414 - Will you? How come? 410 00:22:13,791 --> 00:22:16,042 - Because I believe you will buy booze with it! 411 00:22:16,043 --> 00:22:17,836 I just wanna get from my car to the office 412 00:22:17,837 --> 00:22:21,339 without being confronted by the decay of western society. 413 00:22:21,340 --> 00:22:24,051 Plus, I'm cheap! 414 00:22:25,261 --> 00:22:26,803 - Jerk-off! 415 00:22:57,585 --> 00:22:59,794 - You look like you're having a rough morning. 416 00:22:59,795 --> 00:23:03,007 - Ding, ding, ding! What do we have for her, Johnny? 417 00:23:06,302 --> 00:23:07,552 - Dana. 418 00:23:07,553 --> 00:23:09,554 - All right Samantha, how much will it take 419 00:23:09,555 --> 00:23:10,638 to put an end to all this? 420 00:23:10,639 --> 00:23:11,931 - 50% of your estate. 421 00:23:11,932 --> 00:23:14,851 50%? 422 00:23:14,852 --> 00:23:18,313 With a prenup and proof of adultery? What's your case? 423 00:23:18,314 --> 00:23:19,940 - Our case is simply this. 424 00:23:50,054 --> 00:23:51,764 - I can't stand this. 425 00:24:02,733 --> 00:24:04,901 - Very funny, Fletcher! 426 00:24:04,902 --> 00:24:07,571 You wanna play hardball? I'm game. 427 00:24:08,697 --> 00:24:11,407 - “You wanna play hardball? I'm game." 428 00:24:11,408 --> 00:24:14,410 - What are you doing? - What is wrong with you? 429 00:24:14,411 --> 00:24:18,706 - All rise for the honorable judge, Marshall Stevens. 430 00:24:18,707 --> 00:24:20,960 Honorable! 431 00:24:22,086 --> 00:24:23,211 - Good morning. 432 00:24:23,212 --> 00:24:27,507 Call case number bd09395. 433 00:24:27,508 --> 00:24:30,385 Samantha Cole versus Richard Cole. 434 00:24:30,386 --> 00:24:32,220 How are we doing this morning, counsel? 435 00:24:32,221 --> 00:24:33,554 - Fine. Thank you. 436 00:24:33,555 --> 00:24:35,139 - And you, Mr. Reede? 437 00:24:35,140 --> 00:24:36,474 - I'm a little upset about a bad 438 00:24:36,475 --> 00:24:38,310 sexual episode I had last night. 439 00:24:42,356 --> 00:24:45,858 - Well, you're still young. - It'll happen more and more. 440 00:24:45,859 --> 00:24:49,405 In the meantime, what do you say we get down to business? 441 00:24:50,447 --> 00:24:53,449 First, Mr. Reede, I see where your client... 442 00:24:53,450 --> 00:24:55,618 - You honor, I would like a continuance! 443 00:24:55,619 --> 00:24:57,829 - This case has already been delayed 444 00:24:57,830 --> 00:24:59,497 several times, Mr. Reede. 445 00:24:59,498 --> 00:25:00,665 - I realize that, your honor, 446 00:25:00,666 --> 00:25:03,627 but I would really, really, really, like a continuance. 447 00:25:04,878 --> 00:25:07,297 - I'll have to hear a good cause, counsel. 448 00:25:08,215 --> 00:25:09,215 What's the problem? 449 00:25:19,101 --> 00:25:22,103 - I can't lie! 450 00:25:22,104 --> 00:25:24,355 - Commendable, Mr. Reede, but I'm waiting 451 00:25:24,356 --> 00:25:27,066 to hear good cause, now, do you have one or not? 452 00:25:27,067 --> 00:25:28,192 - Not. 453 00:25:28,193 --> 00:25:30,028 - Motion for continuance denied. 454 00:25:31,030 --> 00:25:33,281 Is there any chance of a settlement in this case? 455 00:25:33,282 --> 00:25:34,532 - I don't think so, your honor, 456 00:25:34,533 --> 00:25:37,411 my client has offered Mrs. Cole $2.4 million, 457 00:25:38,996 --> 00:25:39,996 but Mr. Reede has made it 458 00:25:39,997 --> 00:25:41,873 abundantly clear that he has no desire... 459 00:25:41,874 --> 00:25:44,584 - Settle! Settle! Settle! Settle! Settle! 460 00:25:44,585 --> 00:25:46,461 - I don't want to settle. - You should settle. 461 00:25:46,462 --> 00:25:49,630 - Mr. Reede, you convinced me yesterday, 462 00:25:49,631 --> 00:25:52,717 I'm the victim here, I'm starved for affection, 463 00:25:52,718 --> 00:25:54,969 I'm driven into the arms of another man. 464 00:25:54,970 --> 00:25:57,096 - Seven! - Yeah, whatever. 465 00:25:57,097 --> 00:26:00,224 With the story you came up with, I don't think we can lose. 466 00:26:00,225 --> 00:26:02,351 I want to proceed. 467 00:26:02,352 --> 00:26:04,562 - Mrs. Cole, you don't understand. 468 00:26:04,563 --> 00:26:07,231 - Mr. Reede. Do we have a settlement? 469 00:26:07,232 --> 00:26:08,232 - No! 470 00:26:13,363 --> 00:26:14,405 No, your honor. 471 00:26:14,406 --> 00:26:15,908 - There's no settlement. 472 00:26:17,117 --> 00:26:18,868 Trial to commence, 1:30 sharp. 473 00:26:38,388 --> 00:26:39,972 - It was me! 474 00:26:43,769 --> 00:26:46,270 - Hi, Mr. Reede! Like the new dress? 475 00:26:46,271 --> 00:26:48,273 - Whatever takes the focus off your head. 476 00:26:51,235 --> 00:26:52,069 - What's up, Fletcher? 477 00:26:52,070 --> 00:26:55,863 - Your cholesterol, fatty! Dead man walking! 478 00:26:55,864 --> 00:26:56,782 - Hey Fletcher! - Hey! 479 00:26:56,783 --> 00:26:58,282 You're not important enough to remember. 480 00:26:58,283 --> 00:26:59,575 - What's it gonna be, Mr. Reede? 481 00:26:59,576 --> 00:27:01,369 - A pockmark, eventually! 482 00:27:01,370 --> 00:27:03,747 Don't ask! For god's sakes, don't ask. 483 00:27:05,541 --> 00:27:07,583 All right. You can beat this. 484 00:27:07,584 --> 00:27:09,670 It's all a matter of willpower! 485 00:27:10,754 --> 00:27:12,213 A test. 486 00:27:12,214 --> 00:27:13,214 Something small. 487 00:27:19,888 --> 00:27:22,140 Red. 488 00:27:22,141 --> 00:27:24,642 All right? Now, focus. 489 00:27:24,643 --> 00:27:29,522 The color of this pen is... 490 00:27:30,983 --> 00:27:35,779 The color of this pen is... 491 00:27:40,659 --> 00:27:45,581 The color of the pen that I hold in my hand is 492 00:27:48,458 --> 00:27:49,458 royal blue! 493 00:27:54,381 --> 00:27:56,675 One lie, and I can't say it! 494 00:27:58,719 --> 00:28:00,219 I'll write it. 495 00:28:28,207 --> 00:28:31,834 Write it! Write it, or I'll break it off! 496 00:28:36,965 --> 00:28:38,424 Ah! No! 497 00:28:38,425 --> 00:28:39,425 Come on! 498 00:28:40,177 --> 00:28:41,177 Stop it. 499 00:28:51,313 --> 00:28:53,106 - Boss? What happened? 500 00:28:58,320 --> 00:29:01,822 - The pen is blue. The pen is blue. 501 00:29:01,823 --> 00:29:05,368 The goddamn pen is blue! 502 00:29:08,372 --> 00:29:10,706 - Mr. Reede, are you all right? 503 00:29:10,707 --> 00:29:12,124 - I gotta go home. 504 00:29:12,125 --> 00:29:13,793 - Home? Was the case settled? 505 00:29:13,794 --> 00:29:15,462 No! I have to be in court at 1:30! 506 00:29:17,005 --> 00:29:18,547 - Then how are you going to go home? 507 00:29:18,548 --> 00:29:19,883 - I don't know. I don't know! 508 00:29:23,345 --> 00:29:25,763 Mr. Reede, rubin and Dunn called. 509 00:29:25,764 --> 00:29:28,683 They need to know where the darvis settlement offer stands. 510 00:29:28,684 --> 00:29:32,354 I just proposed a settlement to dick with them! 511 00:29:33,814 --> 00:29:36,232 - “Dick with them. "Got it. 512 00:29:36,233 --> 00:29:39,151 And your mother called, are you still on vacation? 513 00:29:39,152 --> 00:29:40,736 - No. 514 00:29:40,737 --> 00:29:41,571 - Then you're here? 515 00:29:41,572 --> 00:29:42,822 - Yes. 516 00:29:42,823 --> 00:29:44,824 - Thank you for clearing that up, sir. 517 00:29:44,825 --> 00:29:47,201 And your ex-wife called, she wants to know 518 00:29:47,202 --> 00:29:49,120 when you're coming to pick up your son. 519 00:29:49,121 --> 00:29:51,665 - Oh! I'm such a shit! 520 00:29:58,964 --> 00:29:59,756 - Audrey? 521 00:29:59,757 --> 00:30:00,965 - Fletcher, hi, are you still 522 00:30:00,966 --> 00:30:02,341 picking Max up from school today? 523 00:30:02,342 --> 00:30:04,427 - Here's the thing. I really can't! 524 00:30:04,428 --> 00:30:06,637 I had a case I certain would settle, 525 00:30:06,638 --> 00:30:08,597 and it didn't, and I have to go to court this afternoon. 526 00:30:08,598 --> 00:30:09,433 - Right. 527 00:30:09,434 --> 00:30:11,810 - It's true! I really wanna see Max today! 528 00:30:12,853 --> 00:30:14,562 How about that? I really do. 529 00:30:14,563 --> 00:30:16,939 - But things just keep coming up at the last minute, right? 530 00:30:16,940 --> 00:30:18,316 - Yes, but this time it's different. 531 00:30:18,317 --> 00:30:19,984 - I see. And how is that? 532 00:30:19,985 --> 00:30:21,485 - Now I'm telling the truth. 533 00:30:21,486 --> 00:30:22,903 - And last night you weren't. - No 534 00:30:22,904 --> 00:30:24,030 - well, what were you doing? 535 00:30:24,031 --> 00:30:26,033 - Having sex! 536 00:30:27,159 --> 00:30:30,244 - Well, I hope that it was with someone very special. 537 00:30:30,245 --> 00:30:31,662 - No! See, that's the thing. 538 00:30:31,663 --> 00:30:33,289 I don't even like her, but she's a partner 539 00:30:33,290 --> 00:30:35,624 and I thought I could help my career by making her squeal. 540 00:30:39,129 --> 00:30:40,379 - Oh! 541 00:30:42,257 --> 00:30:44,134 - What's wrong with me? 542 00:30:45,177 --> 00:30:46,136 I'm getting what I deserve. 543 00:30:46,137 --> 00:30:48,304 I'm reaping what I sow. I'm... 544 00:30:58,940 --> 00:31:01,025 - Is dad still picking me up? 545 00:31:01,026 --> 00:31:02,402 - No, Max, he's not. 546 00:31:03,653 --> 00:31:05,154 I'm sorry. 547 00:31:05,155 --> 00:31:07,616 But I'm gonna pick you up, okay. I'll work it out. 548 00:31:08,784 --> 00:31:11,077 - I guess my wish didn't come true. 549 00:31:11,078 --> 00:31:12,286 - What wish? 550 00:31:12,287 --> 00:31:15,956 - I wished that for just one day dad couldn't tell a lie. 551 00:31:21,963 --> 00:31:22,963 - Max? 552 00:31:27,010 --> 00:31:30,304 I have something important I wanna talk to you about, okay. 553 00:31:41,317 --> 00:31:44,610 - Audrey, let me explain. - Something has happened to me. 554 00:31:44,611 --> 00:31:46,862 - Well, something else is about to happen to you, Fletcher. 555 00:31:46,863 --> 00:31:48,531 Max and I are moving to Boston. 556 00:31:48,532 --> 00:31:49,366 - What? 557 00:31:49,367 --> 00:31:51,409 - Jerry has asked me to marry him, and Max and I 558 00:31:51,410 --> 00:31:53,786 are going with him this weekend to look at houses. 559 00:31:53,787 --> 00:31:55,454 - I thought it was semi-serious! 560 00:31:55,455 --> 00:31:56,747 - Yeah, well, it's just been given 561 00:31:56,748 --> 00:31:58,416 a violent shove into serious. 562 00:31:58,417 --> 00:32:00,960 - You can't move to Boston, I'll never see Max! 563 00:32:00,961 --> 00:32:02,211 - Well, then you'll have pretty much 564 00:32:02,212 --> 00:32:04,422 the same relationship you have with him now, won't you? 565 00:32:04,423 --> 00:32:05,257 - Where are you? 566 00:32:05,258 --> 00:32:06,298 I'm going home. 567 00:32:06,299 --> 00:32:07,842 - When you get there, just stay there. 568 00:32:07,843 --> 00:32:09,510 I'm coming over. We have to talk. 569 00:32:09,511 --> 00:32:11,263 - Fletcher! - I'll be right there. 570 00:32:15,100 --> 00:32:18,185 - La, la, la, la, la, la! 571 00:32:25,777 --> 00:32:27,070 - Fletcher! - Holy hell! 572 00:32:32,909 --> 00:32:36,162 - You can run, but you can't hide. 573 00:32:41,293 --> 00:32:43,210 - What's your problem, schmuck? 574 00:32:43,211 --> 00:32:47,173 I'm an inconsiderate prick! 575 00:33:09,738 --> 00:33:10,738 Shit! 576 00:33:16,203 --> 00:33:17,203 Shit! 577 00:33:25,587 --> 00:33:26,962 - You know why I pulled you over? 578 00:33:26,963 --> 00:33:30,424 Depends on how long you were following me. 579 00:33:30,425 --> 00:33:33,177 - Why don't we just take it from the top? 580 00:33:33,178 --> 00:33:34,012 - Here it goes. 581 00:33:34,013 --> 00:33:35,930 I sped, I followed too closely, I ran a stop sign, 582 00:33:35,931 --> 00:33:37,389 I almost hit a Chevy, I sped some more, 583 00:33:37,390 --> 00:33:38,766 I failed to yield at a crosswalk. 584 00:33:38,767 --> 00:33:40,100 I changed lanes at the intersection, 585 00:33:40,101 --> 00:33:41,435 I changed lanes without signaling 586 00:33:41,436 --> 00:33:43,355 while running a red light and speeding! 587 00:33:44,981 --> 00:33:45,981 - Is that all? 588 00:33:45,982 --> 00:33:46,982 - No. 589 00:33:49,736 --> 00:33:52,739 I have unpaid parking tickets. 590 00:33:55,492 --> 00:33:56,492 Be gentle. 591 00:34:00,247 --> 00:34:01,789 Audrey! Wait! 592 00:34:05,627 --> 00:34:07,628 Wait, Audrey. Oh! 593 00:34:07,629 --> 00:34:09,004 Hold on. Wait! Wait! 594 00:34:09,005 --> 00:34:13,342 - Wait? Wait? I just had an insight into myself, I'm crazy. 595 00:34:13,343 --> 00:34:14,718 You call me up and say, 596 00:34:14,719 --> 00:34:17,012 "wait, right there. I'll be right over." 597 00:34:17,013 --> 00:34:19,598 And here's the crazy part, I actually wait. 598 00:34:19,599 --> 00:34:20,891 - I can explain this though. 599 00:34:20,892 --> 00:34:23,727 - I have missed a department meeting. I have... 600 00:34:23,728 --> 00:34:25,771 - Did you come here in a cab? - Yes! 601 00:34:25,772 --> 00:34:26,814 - Where's your car? 602 00:34:29,609 --> 00:34:32,444 - Thank you! I can't tell you how much this means to me. 603 00:34:32,445 --> 00:34:36,574 - I can. $1,654.11. 604 00:34:36,575 --> 00:34:37,951 - How do you sleep at night? 605 00:34:41,621 --> 00:34:42,621 I'm taking this. 606 00:34:53,258 --> 00:34:54,926 You scratched my car! 607 00:34:56,177 --> 00:34:58,596 - Where? 608 00:34:58,597 --> 00:34:59,723 - Right there! 609 00:35:01,099 --> 00:35:02,099 - Oh, that. 610 00:35:03,685 --> 00:35:05,436 That was already there. 611 00:35:05,437 --> 00:35:07,147 - Why, you... 612 00:35:08,315 --> 00:35:09,733 You liar! 613 00:35:10,817 --> 00:35:12,610 You know what I'm gonna do about this? 614 00:35:12,611 --> 00:35:13,986 - What? - Nothing! 615 00:35:13,987 --> 00:35:14,987 Because if I take you to small-claims court, 616 00:35:14,988 --> 00:35:17,031 it will just drain 8 hours of my life, 617 00:35:17,032 --> 00:35:18,073 and you probably won't show up, 618 00:35:18,074 --> 00:35:19,491 and if I finally got the judgment, 619 00:35:19,492 --> 00:35:20,826 you'll just stiff me anyway, 620 00:35:20,827 --> 00:35:24,371 so what I'm gonna do, is piss and moan like an impotent jerk 621 00:35:24,372 --> 00:35:27,959 and then bend over and take it up the tailpipe! 622 00:35:28,918 --> 00:35:30,919 - You been here before, haven't you? 623 00:35:32,380 --> 00:35:34,590 - Well, I can't remember when I've had more fun, 624 00:35:34,591 --> 00:35:36,925 but if you'll excuse me, I have a class. 625 00:35:36,926 --> 00:35:38,969 - Are you marrying this guy because you're mad at me? 626 00:35:38,970 --> 00:35:41,096 - No, I divorced you because I was mad at you. 627 00:35:41,097 --> 00:35:42,389 - Audrey, wait. I wanna talk about this! 628 00:35:42,390 --> 00:35:44,350 - Really, what do you wanna say? 629 00:35:44,351 --> 00:35:47,519 - Is this guy right for you? - I mean, he is so not me! 630 00:35:47,520 --> 00:35:49,271 - Yes! That's one of his best qualities. 631 00:35:49,272 --> 00:35:53,692 - Yeah, but he's kind of Magoo. I'm sorry. 632 00:35:53,693 --> 00:35:55,486 - You're wrong, I mean, sometimes, 633 00:35:55,487 --> 00:35:57,279 maybe yes, he is a little... 634 00:35:57,280 --> 00:35:58,114 - Magoo! 635 00:35:58,115 --> 00:36:01,325 - Yes, but since we've been going out... oh, my god. 636 00:36:01,326 --> 00:36:02,326 I'm not having this conversation with you. 637 00:36:02,327 --> 00:36:05,287 - Audrey, you can't go. This is not fair. 638 00:36:05,288 --> 00:36:09,208 - Fair? Oh, okay. Let's define "fair," shall we? 639 00:36:09,209 --> 00:36:11,543 Last night a 5 year old boy was crushed, 640 00:36:11,544 --> 00:36:13,420 because his father lied to him 641 00:36:13,421 --> 00:36:16,298 about coming to his birthday party, fair? 642 00:36:16,299 --> 00:36:17,217 - Last night... 643 00:36:17,218 --> 00:36:19,009 - Was none of my business. - Thank you. 644 00:36:19,010 --> 00:36:20,052 - None of my business. 645 00:36:20,053 --> 00:36:21,970 Two years ago, it was my business, but see, 646 00:36:21,971 --> 00:36:23,722 I don't have to care about that anymore. 647 00:36:23,723 --> 00:36:25,599 I don't care, that's the magic of divorce, 648 00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:27,267 but it matters to Max! 649 00:36:27,268 --> 00:36:28,977 Everything you do, matters to Max, 650 00:36:28,978 --> 00:36:30,771 and everything you don't do. 651 00:36:30,772 --> 00:36:33,107 - All right, now let me tell you something. 652 00:36:33,108 --> 00:36:34,651 I'm a bad father! 653 00:36:37,946 --> 00:36:39,405 I mean... 654 00:36:45,036 --> 00:36:46,662 I'm a bad father. 655 00:36:49,207 --> 00:36:53,711 - You're not a bad father, when you show up. 656 00:36:53,712 --> 00:36:54,837 - What if I come over right after 657 00:36:54,838 --> 00:36:56,255 court light-out and play ball with Max? 658 00:36:56,256 --> 00:36:57,881 Then you and I can sit down and talk 659 00:36:57,882 --> 00:36:59,842 before you make any rash decisions! 660 00:36:59,843 --> 00:37:01,719 - No, we are leaving tonight. 661 00:37:01,720 --> 00:37:04,930 - Please Audrey, give me one more chance. 662 00:37:04,931 --> 00:37:07,599 I'm throwing myself on the mercy of the court. 663 00:37:07,600 --> 00:37:11,771 I lost you, but please, don't make me lose Max, too. 664 00:37:15,442 --> 00:37:18,944 Give me a chance to be the father I started out to be. 665 00:37:23,533 --> 00:37:25,660 You're really coming? 666 00:37:26,578 --> 00:37:27,995 - This is ironclad. 667 00:37:27,996 --> 00:37:31,290 This is the mother of all promises. What time? 668 00:37:31,291 --> 00:37:33,375 Okay, 6:00. 669 00:37:33,376 --> 00:37:35,711 - 10 to 6:00. - All right. 670 00:37:35,712 --> 00:37:37,171 All right, all right, all right, 671 00:37:37,172 --> 00:37:40,924 but if I tell Max that you're coming, and you don't show up, 672 00:37:40,925 --> 00:37:43,218 and I have to see that look on his face, 673 00:37:43,219 --> 00:37:44,429 that heartbreaking look, 674 00:37:46,181 --> 00:37:47,723 we're going to Boston. 675 00:37:48,601 --> 00:37:51,185 - If I don't show up, I'll pack you myself. 676 00:37:51,186 --> 00:37:54,813 I will lovingly wrap your knickknacks with bubble paper. 677 00:37:54,814 --> 00:37:55,814 - I hope so. 678 00:37:58,276 --> 00:38:00,987 Do you know what your son was doing at 8:15 last night? 679 00:38:02,238 --> 00:38:05,449 He was making a birthday wish, that for just one day 680 00:38:05,450 --> 00:38:07,743 his father couldn't tell a lie. 681 00:38:13,541 --> 00:38:16,794 - Oh, my god! That's it! 682 00:38:16,795 --> 00:38:19,296 - “I do not like them, Sam I am." 683 00:38:19,297 --> 00:38:22,508 "I do not like green eggs and ham.“ 684 00:38:22,509 --> 00:38:24,802 "would you like them here or there?" 685 00:38:24,803 --> 00:38:25,969 "I would not like them..." 686 00:38:25,970 --> 00:38:26,970 - Excuse me. 687 00:38:28,056 --> 00:38:32,059 Hi. I'm Max's bad father. I'm his father. 688 00:38:32,060 --> 00:38:33,435 - Dad! 689 00:38:33,436 --> 00:38:35,605 - Could I borrow him for just one second? 690 00:38:37,148 --> 00:38:38,982 Monster Max! 691 00:38:38,983 --> 00:38:41,235 - Dadzilla! You came to play catch? 692 00:38:41,236 --> 00:38:42,569 - I'd like to, but I can't right now. 693 00:38:42,570 --> 00:38:44,279 Max, I gotta talk to you. 694 00:38:44,280 --> 00:38:45,656 Your mommy told me about that wish 695 00:38:45,657 --> 00:38:48,200 you made last night, it came true, Max. 696 00:38:48,201 --> 00:38:50,786 - Really, you mean you have to tell the truth? 697 00:38:50,787 --> 00:38:52,246 - Yes. - No matter what? 698 00:38:52,247 --> 00:38:53,122 - No matter what! 699 00:38:53,123 --> 00:38:54,790 - Is wrestling real? 700 00:38:54,791 --> 00:38:57,000 - In the Olympics, yes. On channel 23, no. 701 00:38:57,001 --> 00:38:59,753 - Will sitting too close to the TV set make me go blind? 702 00:38:59,754 --> 00:39:01,213 - Not in a million years. 703 00:39:01,214 --> 00:39:04,217 - If I keep making this face, will it get stuck that way? 704 00:39:05,176 --> 00:39:07,511 - In fact, some people make a good living that way. 705 00:39:10,557 --> 00:39:13,392 Now listen, Max, you gotta do something for me. 706 00:39:13,393 --> 00:39:15,602 I need you to take back that wish. 707 00:39:15,603 --> 00:39:17,771 - So you can lie? 708 00:39:17,772 --> 00:39:18,856 - Yes. 709 00:39:18,857 --> 00:39:21,192 - But not to you, you see, Max, 710 00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:27,323 sometimes grownups need to lie. 711 00:39:27,740 --> 00:39:29,742 It's hard to explain, but if... 712 00:39:31,494 --> 00:39:32,911 Look, here's a good example, 713 00:39:32,912 --> 00:39:34,413 when your mommy was pregnant with you, 714 00:39:34,414 --> 00:39:35,914 she gained a good 40 pounds, 715 00:39:35,915 --> 00:39:38,584 there was nothing she wouldn't eat, and daddy was scared, 716 00:39:38,585 --> 00:39:39,960 but when she'd ask me, "how do I look?" 717 00:39:39,961 --> 00:39:42,004 I'd say, “honey, you look great." 718 00:39:42,005 --> 00:39:44,298 "You're beautiful. You're glowing." 719 00:39:44,299 --> 00:39:46,300 If I had told mommy she looked like a cow, 720 00:39:46,301 --> 00:39:48,427 it would have hurt her feelings, you understand. 721 00:39:48,428 --> 00:39:50,888 - My teacher tells me real beauty is on the inside. 722 00:39:50,889 --> 00:39:52,849 - That's just something ugly people say. 723 00:39:54,434 --> 00:39:56,643 Max, no one can survive in the adult world 724 00:39:56,644 --> 00:39:58,312 if they have to stick to the truth. 725 00:39:58,313 --> 00:40:01,064 I could lose my case, I could lose my promotion, 726 00:40:01,065 --> 00:40:02,649 I could even lose my job. 727 00:40:02,650 --> 00:40:04,277 Now, I need your help, Max. Okay? 728 00:40:07,071 --> 00:40:11,199 - Okays, now do whatever you did last night, 729 00:40:11,200 --> 00:40:12,410 only this time, 730 00:40:13,703 --> 00:40:15,038 make it an unwish. 731 00:40:25,006 --> 00:40:25,965 - I did it. 732 00:40:25,966 --> 00:40:29,594 - Excellent! Now, I just need a little test. 733 00:40:49,322 --> 00:40:50,614 - Did it work? 734 00:40:50,615 --> 00:40:52,575 - Not like I'd hoped. Did you unwish it? 735 00:40:53,826 --> 00:40:56,495 - Only... - What? Only what? 736 00:40:56,496 --> 00:40:59,831 - Yesterday, when I wished it, I really meant it, 737 00:40:59,832 --> 00:41:01,792 this time when I unwished it, 738 00:41:01,793 --> 00:41:04,169 I only did it 'cause you told me to. 739 00:41:04,170 --> 00:41:06,672 - All right, then, do it again, 740 00:41:06,673 --> 00:41:08,548 and this time, mean it. 741 00:41:08,549 --> 00:41:09,800 - But I can't! 742 00:41:09,801 --> 00:41:11,009 - Why not? 743 00:41:11,010 --> 00:41:13,345 - 'Cause I don't want you to lie. 744 00:41:13,346 --> 00:41:18,058 - I explained this, I have to lie, everybody lies. 745 00:41:18,059 --> 00:41:21,687 Mommy lies, even the wonderful Jerry lies. 746 00:41:21,688 --> 00:41:24,107 - But you're the only one that makes me feel bad. 747 00:41:26,359 --> 00:41:29,736 - Max, recess is over. Come on in! 748 00:41:34,742 --> 00:41:36,702 - Mom says we're moving to Boston. 749 00:41:36,703 --> 00:41:39,330 - That isn't for sure yet. 750 00:41:40,206 --> 00:41:43,001 She promised we'd talk about it when I come over tonight. 751 00:41:44,210 --> 00:41:47,547 I am coming! You believe me, don't you, Max? 752 00:41:49,549 --> 00:41:51,009 I'll see you later, buddy. 753 00:42:01,602 --> 00:42:02,769 - Yo Fletcher. How's it hanging? 754 00:42:02,770 --> 00:42:04,897 - Short, shriveled and always to the left. 755 00:42:09,694 --> 00:42:13,280 - Boss, it's skull, he knocked over another atm, 756 00:42:13,281 --> 00:42:17,242 this time at knife-point, he needs your legal advice. 757 00:42:21,080 --> 00:42:24,666 - Stop breaking the law, asshole! 758 00:42:33,092 --> 00:42:35,218 - Boss, are you all right? 759 00:42:35,219 --> 00:42:36,846 - My son hates me. 760 00:42:38,598 --> 00:42:43,019 - Max loves you. I've seen you together, you're his hero. 761 00:42:43,936 --> 00:42:44,936 - Oh, yeah? 762 00:42:46,606 --> 00:42:49,275 Last night at his birthday party, he made a wish, 763 00:42:50,193 --> 00:42:54,071 that I wouldn't be able to lie for one whole day. 764 00:42:54,990 --> 00:42:56,823 - It came true. 765 00:42:56,824 --> 00:42:58,868 - What? - Max's wish! 766 00:42:59,911 --> 00:43:00,953 It came true. 767 00:43:08,044 --> 00:43:11,171 Boss, maybe you should just take a few days off. 768 00:43:11,172 --> 00:43:13,381 Greta, didn't it seem weird to you 769 00:43:13,382 --> 00:43:15,717 that I kept telling the truth all morning? 770 00:43:15,718 --> 00:43:19,638 - Well, yeah, but... 771 00:43:19,639 --> 00:43:23,183 What are you saying? That you are incapable of lying? 772 00:43:23,184 --> 00:43:26,603 - That's right! I am incapable of lying! 773 00:43:26,604 --> 00:43:27,814 Just for today? 774 00:43:28,731 --> 00:43:30,899 Apparently, till 8:15 tonight. 775 00:43:30,900 --> 00:43:33,026 It's just one of those 24-hour curses. 776 00:43:33,027 --> 00:43:35,070 Yeah, those are going around. 777 00:43:35,071 --> 00:43:36,238 - You don't believe me, do you? 778 00:43:36,239 --> 00:43:37,447 - Of course not. 779 00:43:39,075 --> 00:43:41,118 - How ironic! 780 00:43:41,119 --> 00:43:45,205 Okay, ask me something you think I would normally lie about. 781 00:43:45,206 --> 00:43:46,623 - All right. 782 00:43:46,624 --> 00:43:48,917 Remember a couple of months ago, when I wanted a raise? 783 00:43:48,918 --> 00:43:50,168 - Just forget it. I don't wanna do this. 784 00:43:50,169 --> 00:43:51,878 - And the company wouldn't give me one, 785 00:43:51,879 --> 00:43:54,131 and I asked if you would give it to me 786 00:43:54,132 --> 00:43:56,424 out of your own pocket, and you said 787 00:43:56,425 --> 00:43:57,717 that the company would not allow it, 788 00:43:57,718 --> 00:44:00,053 because it would create jealousy 789 00:44:00,054 --> 00:44:02,097 among the other secretaries. 790 00:44:02,098 --> 00:44:04,891 Now, was that true, or did you just 791 00:44:04,892 --> 00:44:06,434 not wanna pony up the dough? 792 00:44:09,564 --> 00:44:11,690 - Greta, please! 793 00:44:11,691 --> 00:44:13,567 Hello, judge Stevens, hi! 794 00:44:13,568 --> 00:44:14,860 Fletcher reede, I'm scheduled to be 795 00:44:14,861 --> 00:44:16,194 in your court in half an hour. 796 00:44:16,195 --> 00:44:19,573 Judge Stevens, I badly, badly, need a continuance. 797 00:44:19,574 --> 00:44:22,159 III. Am I I"? 798 00:44:22,160 --> 00:44:24,286 That is the perfect question for you to ask. 799 00:44:24,287 --> 00:44:25,912 Greta please lie to him for me! 800 00:44:25,913 --> 00:44:27,038 - I remember when you bought me 801 00:44:27,039 --> 00:44:31,001 this antique frame from Tiffany's, Tiffany's? 802 00:44:31,002 --> 00:44:34,462 - Garage sale. $6.50 marked down from $10. 803 00:44:36,841 --> 00:44:38,133 I'll give you the raise! 804 00:44:39,969 --> 00:44:41,845 - Here's your raise. 805 00:44:43,431 --> 00:44:44,890 - Hi, judge Stevens! 806 00:44:44,891 --> 00:44:46,892 Yes, I know I haven't given you an answer yet, 807 00:44:46,893 --> 00:44:49,936 but, illness could mean so many things. 808 00:44:49,937 --> 00:44:53,106 Can you hold? Hello? Mom! 809 00:44:54,984 --> 00:44:57,027 I wasn't really on vacation, 810 00:44:57,028 --> 00:44:59,487 'cause I didn't wanna talk to you! 811 00:44:59,488 --> 00:45:00,906 Because you insist on talking to me 812 00:45:00,907 --> 00:45:03,450 about dad's bowel movements, size, color, frequency. 813 00:45:03,451 --> 00:45:05,077 I'll call you later! Hello? 814 00:45:06,579 --> 00:45:11,666 Oh! Damn it! I cut him off. I cut off the judge! 815 00:45:16,839 --> 00:45:19,174 Greta! Don't leave! 816 00:45:19,175 --> 00:45:21,260 I'm on my knees in a $900 suit! 817 00:45:23,930 --> 00:45:27,098 - Mr. Reede, several years ago, a friend of mine 818 00:45:27,099 --> 00:45:29,017 had a burglar on her roof, a burglar. 819 00:45:29,018 --> 00:45:30,769 He fell through the kitchen skylight, 820 00:45:30,770 --> 00:45:32,103 landed on a cutting board, 821 00:45:32,104 --> 00:45:34,064 on a butcher's knife, cutting his leg. 822 00:45:34,065 --> 00:45:37,359 The burglar sued my friend. He sued my friend! 823 00:45:37,360 --> 00:45:39,861 And because of guys like you, he won! 824 00:45:39,862 --> 00:45:44,282 My friend had to pay the burglar $6,000. Is that justice? 825 00:45:44,283 --> 00:45:45,283 - No. 826 00:45:46,327 --> 00:45:47,536 I'd have got him $10,000. 827 00:45:49,121 --> 00:45:50,288 - Good-bye, Mr. Reede. 828 00:45:50,289 --> 00:45:52,666 - No! No! No! Wait! I didn't understand the question! 829 00:45:52,667 --> 00:45:53,917 Ask me again! Ask me again! 830 00:45:53,918 --> 00:45:55,377 - Have a nice day in court. 831 00:45:55,378 --> 00:45:56,378 - Greta! 832 00:45:58,047 --> 00:45:59,547 - Hi. - God in heaven! 833 00:46:00,883 --> 00:46:03,426 - It's nice to see you too Fletcher. Are you busy? 834 00:46:03,427 --> 00:46:04,427 - Extremely. 835 00:46:04,428 --> 00:46:06,554 - Good. Would you follow me, please? 836 00:46:11,102 --> 00:46:12,894 Did you know that the partnership committee 837 00:46:12,895 --> 00:46:15,397 is being headed up be Mr. Allan himself? 838 00:46:15,398 --> 00:46:18,191 You used to work directly for Mr. Allan, didn't you? 839 00:46:18,192 --> 00:46:19,026 - Yeah! 840 00:46:19,027 --> 00:46:20,735 - Tell me, 841 00:46:20,736 --> 00:46:21,861 what do you think of him? 842 00:46:23,489 --> 00:46:25,907 - He's a pedantic, pontificating, pretentious bastard! 843 00:46:25,908 --> 00:46:27,867 A belligerent old fart, a worthless steaming 844 00:46:27,868 --> 00:46:31,121 pile of cow dung, figuratively speaking. 845 00:46:31,122 --> 00:46:34,165 - Really? How delightful. This way. 846 00:46:36,210 --> 00:46:38,795 Pardon me for interrupting your meeting. 847 00:46:38,796 --> 00:46:40,881 Mr. Allan, you remember Fletcher reede? 848 00:46:41,924 --> 00:46:45,010 - Oh, yes, yes. Nice to see you again, Fletcher. 849 00:46:45,011 --> 00:46:48,013 By the way, I'll be observing you in court this afternoon. 850 00:46:48,014 --> 00:46:50,515 I've been hearing some good things about you. 851 00:46:50,516 --> 00:46:53,727 - Well, Fletcher has been telling me 852 00:46:53,728 --> 00:46:56,062 how much he thinks of you. 853 00:46:56,063 --> 00:46:58,189 Oh, why don't you tell Mr. Allan. 854 00:46:58,190 --> 00:47:00,735 Well, what do you think of him? 855 00:47:07,825 --> 00:47:11,244 - He's a pedantic, pontificating, pretentious bastard. 856 00:47:11,245 --> 00:47:13,288 A belligerent old fart, a worthless 857 00:47:13,289 --> 00:47:17,084 steaming pile of cow dung. 858 00:47:18,002 --> 00:47:20,463 Figuratively speaking. 859 00:47:40,649 --> 00:47:43,443 - That's the funniest damn thing I've ever heard! 860 00:47:43,444 --> 00:47:47,823 You're a real card, reede! I love a good roast! 861 00:47:49,408 --> 00:47:50,408 Do Simmons! 862 00:47:51,619 --> 00:47:53,036 - Simmons is old! 863 00:47:55,247 --> 00:47:56,831 He should've been out of the game years ago, 864 00:47:56,832 --> 00:47:58,833 but he can't stay home 'cause he hates his wife. 865 00:48:01,629 --> 00:48:03,171 You've met her at the Christmas parties, 866 00:48:03,172 --> 00:48:05,840 she's the one that gets plastered and calls him a retard. 867 00:48:06,718 --> 00:48:11,012 And you, Tom, you're the biggest brown nose I've ever seen! 868 00:48:11,013 --> 00:48:13,139 You've got your head so far up Mr. Allan's ass, 869 00:48:13,140 --> 00:48:15,683 I can't tell where you end and he begins! 870 00:48:15,684 --> 00:48:18,103 Priceless! 871 00:48:20,439 --> 00:48:22,982 - You have bad breath caused by gingivitis. 872 00:48:22,983 --> 00:48:24,651 You couldn't get a porn star off. 873 00:48:24,652 --> 00:48:25,985 Your hairpiece looks like something 874 00:48:25,986 --> 00:48:27,487 that killed crossing the highway. 875 00:48:27,488 --> 00:48:28,738 I don't know whether to comb it 876 00:48:28,739 --> 00:48:31,616 or scrape it off with a shovel and Bury it in lime! 877 00:48:33,077 --> 00:48:34,285 Loser! 878 00:48:34,286 --> 00:48:35,286 Idiot! 879 00:48:35,287 --> 00:48:36,205 Wimp! 880 00:48:36,206 --> 00:48:37,414 Degenerate! 881 00:48:37,415 --> 00:48:39,040 Slut! 882 00:48:41,210 --> 00:48:43,878 - I like your style, reede! 883 00:48:43,879 --> 00:48:45,964 That's just what this stuffy company needs! 884 00:48:45,965 --> 00:48:47,715 A little irreverence! 885 00:48:47,716 --> 00:48:50,093 - Good! I'll see you later, dickhead! 886 00:48:51,887 --> 00:48:53,638 - Dickhead! Priceless! 887 00:49:10,614 --> 00:49:13,741 - Oh! Keep your eye on that boy. 888 00:49:13,742 --> 00:49:15,118 Dickhead! 889 00:49:36,140 --> 00:49:39,392 Third district court is now in session. 890 00:49:39,393 --> 00:49:42,980 The honorable judge Marshall Stevens presiding. 891 00:49:44,815 --> 00:49:49,194 - Afternoon, counselors. - Are we ready to begin? 892 00:49:49,195 --> 00:49:50,029 - No, sir! 893 00:49:50,030 --> 00:49:51,404 We are not ready to begin, 894 00:49:51,405 --> 00:49:53,907 because my client has not arrived! 895 00:49:53,908 --> 00:49:55,909 - Hurry up! Move it! Move it! 896 00:49:55,910 --> 00:49:58,828 J“ here she comes to wreck the day j“ 897 00:49:58,829 --> 00:49:59,954 - Mr. Reede! 898 00:49:59,955 --> 00:50:01,206 - Sorry, your honor. 899 00:50:01,207 --> 00:50:03,958 - Go, go, go. And lupe, you keep those kids quiet. 900 00:50:03,959 --> 00:50:06,169 I'm not even close to kidding. 901 00:50:06,170 --> 00:50:09,547 Sorry. Billy threw up in the car. 902 00:50:09,548 --> 00:50:12,217 - You brought your kids to your divorce? 903 00:50:12,218 --> 00:50:13,801 - Sympathy. - Well, it's working. 904 00:50:13,802 --> 00:50:16,429 I feel sorry for them already. 905 00:50:16,430 --> 00:50:19,390 Miss appleton, you may begin. 906 00:50:19,391 --> 00:50:21,851 From march 6 through June 12, 907 00:50:21,852 --> 00:50:25,605 I surveilled Mrs. Cole at the behest of Mr. Cole. 908 00:50:25,606 --> 00:50:27,649 During that period, I noted that Mr. Cole 909 00:50:27,650 --> 00:50:31,528 left each day between 7:40 and 7:50. 910 00:50:31,529 --> 00:50:34,614 Thereafter Mrs. Cole would frequently have 911 00:50:34,615 --> 00:50:39,327 a male visitor arrive and stay from one to four hours. 912 00:50:39,328 --> 00:50:44,123 I was able to take several photographs of the male visitor. 913 00:50:44,124 --> 00:50:45,166 - I see. 914 00:50:46,877 --> 00:50:50,129 Do you know what Mrs. Cole and her male visitor 915 00:50:50,130 --> 00:50:54,175 did during these frequent visits? 916 00:50:54,176 --> 00:50:56,970 - Well, they were good about keeping the shades drawn, 917 00:50:56,971 --> 00:51:01,267 but I was able to make a recording of one such session. 918 00:51:03,102 --> 00:51:05,311 - Your honor, as you are aware, 919 00:51:05,312 --> 00:51:07,355 under the terms of the prenuptial agreement, 920 00:51:07,356 --> 00:51:11,360 if Mrs. Cole commits adultery, she is entitled to nothing. 921 00:51:12,236 --> 00:51:14,195 With your permission, we'd like to play 922 00:51:14,196 --> 00:51:15,864 the following tape recording. 923 00:51:18,158 --> 00:51:19,576 Oh yeah. 924 00:51:19,577 --> 00:51:22,912 Its that good to you baby. Here comes big daddy! 925 00:51:22,913 --> 00:51:24,372 - Oh, god! 926 00:51:24,373 --> 00:51:26,750 Oh! Do it to me! Do it to me! 927 00:51:27,876 --> 00:51:32,840 Harder! Harder! 928 00:51:35,968 --> 00:51:37,094 - Oh! Come on! 929 00:51:38,137 --> 00:51:40,972 Your honor, how can it be proved that the male voice 930 00:51:40,973 --> 00:51:43,349 on that tape is not Mr. Cole himself? 931 00:51:43,350 --> 00:51:47,729 - You are such a better lover than my husband! Oh, my god! 932 00:51:47,730 --> 00:51:49,606 - Your honor, I object! 933 00:51:49,607 --> 00:51:51,274 - And why is that, Mr. Reede? 934 00:51:51,275 --> 00:51:53,276 - Because it's devastating to my case! 935 00:51:53,277 --> 00:51:54,277 - Overruled. 936 00:51:54,278 --> 00:51:55,404 - Good call! 937 00:51:56,655 --> 00:51:58,990 I gotta go. I still haven't cleaned your pool. 938 00:51:58,991 --> 00:52:00,074 - Your witness. 939 00:52:00,075 --> 00:52:03,286 All right. 940 00:52:03,287 --> 00:52:05,789 - Well, Mr. Reede, you may proceed. 941 00:52:11,545 --> 00:52:12,545 - How? 942 00:52:37,863 --> 00:52:39,155 Your honor, would the court be willing 943 00:52:39,156 --> 00:52:41,199 to Grant me a short bathroom break? 944 00:52:41,200 --> 00:52:42,700 - Can't it wait? 945 00:52:42,701 --> 00:52:43,701 - Yes, it can. 946 00:52:44,620 --> 00:52:45,537 But I've heard that if you hold it, 947 00:52:45,538 --> 00:52:47,705 you can damage the prostate gland, making it very difficult 948 00:52:47,706 --> 00:52:50,708 to get an erection or even become aroused! 949 00:52:50,709 --> 00:52:52,043 - Is that true? 950 00:52:54,588 --> 00:52:56,798 - In that case, I better take a little break myself. 951 00:52:56,799 --> 00:52:59,300 But you get back here immediately so we can finish this. 952 00:53:15,984 --> 00:53:18,946 - How am I going to get out of this? 953 00:53:22,366 --> 00:53:24,451 Think. 954 00:53:25,369 --> 00:53:26,369 Think! 955 00:54:25,345 --> 00:54:27,181 - What the hell are you doing? 956 00:54:28,640 --> 00:54:31,350 - I'm kicking my ass! 957 00:54:31,351 --> 00:54:32,351 Do you mind? 958 00:54:58,086 --> 00:55:00,338 - I found him like this in the bathroom, your honor. 959 00:55:00,339 --> 00:55:02,507 Somebody beat the hell out of him. 960 00:55:02,508 --> 00:55:03,467 - Who did this? 961 00:55:03,468 --> 00:55:05,885 - A madman, your honor! 962 00:55:05,886 --> 00:55:08,888 A desperate fool at the end of his pitiful rope! 963 00:55:08,889 --> 00:55:10,389 - What did he look like? 964 00:55:10,390 --> 00:55:14,644 - About 6'2", 180 pounds, big teeth, kind of gangly. 965 00:55:14,645 --> 00:55:16,729 - Bailiff, have the deputy search the building. 966 00:55:16,730 --> 00:55:17,730 - Yes, sir. 967 00:55:19,441 --> 00:55:20,775 - Order! 968 00:55:20,776 --> 00:55:21,859 Order! 969 00:55:26,824 --> 00:55:27,949 Under the circumstances, 970 00:55:27,950 --> 00:55:30,284 I have no choice but to recess this case 971 00:55:30,285 --> 00:55:33,162 until 9:00 A.M. tomorrow morning. 972 00:55:33,163 --> 00:55:36,124 Unless, of course, you feel you can still proceed. 973 00:55:40,254 --> 00:55:41,712 Can you? 974 00:55:49,137 --> 00:55:50,137 I can. 975 00:55:51,640 --> 00:55:53,433 - I admire your courage, Mr. Reede. 976 00:55:54,643 --> 00:55:57,687 We'll take a short recess so that you can compose yourself, 977 00:55:57,688 --> 00:55:59,021 and then we'll get started. 978 00:56:09,116 --> 00:56:10,616 - Here you go. 979 00:56:23,630 --> 00:56:24,797 - Hello? 980 00:56:24,798 --> 00:56:25,674 Dad? 981 00:56:25,675 --> 00:56:27,341 - Max? 982 00:56:27,342 --> 00:56:28,302 How's it going? 983 00:56:28,303 --> 00:56:31,220 - Great, you know Paul and Emanuel from across the street? 984 00:56:32,056 --> 00:56:35,016 - Well, they never wanna play baseball with me, 985 00:56:35,017 --> 00:56:37,268 but I told them I'm playing tonight with my dad. 986 00:56:37,269 --> 00:56:39,729 So now they wanna play with us. Is that okay? 987 00:56:39,730 --> 00:56:42,648 - Sure. The more the merrier. 988 00:56:42,649 --> 00:56:45,234 - Coolest! Do you wanna be Jose canseco? 989 00:56:45,235 --> 00:56:46,861 - Oh, yeah. 990 00:56:46,862 --> 00:56:49,614 Who else is gonna hit that famous nomo slider? 991 00:56:49,615 --> 00:56:50,615 - Mr. Reede. 992 00:56:51,825 --> 00:56:53,576 - I gotta go now, Max. 993 00:56:53,577 --> 00:56:56,370 I'll see you in a couple of hours, okay, all right, bye. 994 00:56:56,371 --> 00:56:57,371 - Bye, dad. 995 00:56:59,249 --> 00:57:02,627 He's really coming! He's really coming! I'm gonna go change. 996 00:57:02,628 --> 00:57:03,711 - Okay, go ahead! 997 00:57:03,712 --> 00:57:04,712 - Yeah! 998 00:57:09,551 --> 00:57:10,551 - Mr. Reede! 999 00:57:11,637 --> 00:57:12,846 - “Mr. Reede! Mr. Reede!“ 1000 00:57:16,391 --> 00:57:18,100 - this is my lawyer, he's a little unorthodox, 1001 00:57:18,101 --> 00:57:19,978 you'll get used to him. 1002 00:57:21,396 --> 00:57:24,273 Mr. Reede, you remember Kenneth falk, the man from the tape. 1003 00:57:24,274 --> 00:57:25,150 - How could I forget? 1004 00:57:25,151 --> 00:57:27,026 - Hey, how you doing? 1005 00:57:27,027 --> 00:57:30,112 - I've slipped into the seventh circle of hell, thank you. 1006 00:57:30,113 --> 00:57:33,366 - Shouldn't we be going over our testimony right now? 1007 00:57:33,367 --> 00:57:36,327 - Basically, the plan is, I walk you through the tape. 1008 00:57:36,328 --> 00:57:38,454 Step by step, I ask you questions... 1009 00:57:38,455 --> 00:57:41,415 - Right, and we give the explanation you came up with. 1010 00:57:41,416 --> 00:57:42,292 - Exactly. 1011 00:57:42,293 --> 00:57:44,627 - So all we are gonna do is lie. That sounds simple. 1012 00:57:44,628 --> 00:57:45,628 - Doesn't it! 1013 00:57:46,880 --> 00:57:49,131 Then I'll finish up with a dramatic series of questions. 1014 00:57:49,132 --> 00:57:53,594 Something like, Mr. Falk, isn't it true 1015 00:57:53,595 --> 00:57:57,975 that you and Mrs. Cole have never made... 1016 00:58:06,525 --> 00:58:07,942 I can't do it. 1017 00:58:07,943 --> 00:58:12,739 I can't finish the question if I know the answer is a lie. 1018 00:58:27,671 --> 00:58:29,381 - You may proceed, Mr. Reede. 1019 00:58:43,311 --> 00:58:44,604 - Respondent calls, 1020 00:58:47,315 --> 00:58:48,483 Kenneth falk. 1021 00:59:06,585 --> 00:59:08,377 - Raise your right hand. 1022 00:59:08,378 --> 00:59:09,920 Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, 1023 00:59:09,921 --> 00:59:11,672 and nothing but the truth, so help you god? 1024 00:59:11,673 --> 00:59:12,673 -I do! 1025 00:59:13,550 --> 00:59:14,550 I mean... 1026 00:59:18,221 --> 00:59:19,221 -I do. 1027 00:59:26,480 --> 00:59:27,480 - Mr. Falk. 1028 00:59:32,944 --> 00:59:34,738 Do you know my client, Samantha Cole? 1029 00:59:35,864 --> 00:59:36,864 - Yes. 1030 00:59:40,368 --> 00:59:42,203 Isn't it true that your relationship 1031 00:59:42,204 --> 00:59:44,955 with my client is entirely platonic? 1032 00:59:44,956 --> 00:59:47,416 I object, your honor! 1033 00:59:47,417 --> 00:59:48,418 - To yourself? 1034 00:59:50,128 --> 00:59:55,092 - Yeah, but I would like to rephrase the question. 1035 00:59:58,512 --> 01:00:02,348 Mr. Falk, would I be accurate if I described 1036 01:00:02,349 --> 01:00:05,851 your relationship with Mrs. Cole as totally professional? 1037 01:00:05,852 --> 01:00:08,063 I object, and I move to strike! 1038 01:00:09,231 --> 01:00:11,982 - Mr. Reede, I don't know what you're on, 1039 01:00:11,983 --> 01:00:14,361 but you better get to the point, and quick. 1040 01:00:16,738 --> 01:00:17,738 - Thank you, sir. 1041 01:00:22,369 --> 01:00:24,537 Is your relationship with my client entirely platonic? 1042 01:00:24,538 --> 01:00:27,374 Not! Is not your relationship with my client... 1043 01:00:28,583 --> 01:00:29,583 Bad baby, bad baby! 1044 01:00:30,460 --> 01:00:34,880 Did you ever not make io... did you... 1045 01:00:34,881 --> 01:00:35,757 - Mr. Reede! 1046 01:00:35,758 --> 01:00:38,718 - You had sex with her every time you met, didn't you? Liar! 1047 01:00:40,095 --> 01:00:41,679 - He's badgering the witness. 1048 01:00:41,680 --> 01:00:42,514 - It's his witness. 1049 01:00:42,515 --> 01:00:44,014 - You slammed her! You dunked her donuts! 1050 01:00:44,015 --> 01:00:45,224 You gave her dog a snausage! 1051 01:00:45,225 --> 01:00:47,977 You stuffed her like a Thanksgiving Turkey! 1052 01:00:50,689 --> 01:00:53,107 - All right! All right, it's true! Okay! 1053 01:00:53,108 --> 01:00:55,443 I humped her brains out! There, now you happy? 1054 01:01:02,075 --> 01:01:04,744 No further questions. 1055 01:01:23,305 --> 01:01:24,305 - No questions. 1056 01:01:26,725 --> 01:01:27,725 - You may step down. 1057 01:01:32,564 --> 01:01:35,734 Do I dare ask you to call your next witness? 1058 01:01:39,321 --> 01:01:42,239 - I have no further witnesses, your honor. 1059 01:01:42,240 --> 01:01:44,783 - What are you doing? Call me! 1060 01:01:44,784 --> 01:01:48,370 - You do not understand. I can't lie. 1061 01:01:48,371 --> 01:01:51,457 I can't do anything dishonest until 8:15 tonight! 1062 01:01:51,458 --> 01:01:54,668 - Listen, you bastard! I want my money! 1063 01:01:54,669 --> 01:01:57,880 I am not going to end up a 31 year old divorcée on welfare, 1064 01:01:57,881 --> 01:01:59,465 because my scumbag attorney 1065 01:01:59,466 --> 01:02:01,343 had a sudden attack of conscience! 1066 01:02:04,639 --> 01:02:07,014 - If Mr. Reede has no further witnesses, 1067 01:02:07,015 --> 01:02:10,351 then I have no choice but to rule in favor of... 1068 01:02:10,352 --> 01:02:11,518 - Your honor! 1069 01:02:14,272 --> 01:02:17,107 I call Samantha Cole to the stand. 1070 01:02:19,527 --> 01:02:21,278 Order. 1071 01:02:21,279 --> 01:02:23,364 Order! 1072 01:02:23,365 --> 01:02:25,074 - Order! - Knock it off! 1073 01:02:28,453 --> 01:02:31,080 Mr. Reede, it is out of sheer morbid curiosity 1074 01:02:31,081 --> 01:02:33,625 I'm allowing this freak show to continue. 1075 01:02:37,003 --> 01:02:38,003 Mrs. Cole, 1076 01:02:39,005 --> 01:02:40,005 if you dare. 1077 01:02:55,480 --> 01:02:56,690 - Mrs. Cole, 1078 01:02:58,108 --> 01:03:01,695 is this a copy of your driver's license? 1079 01:03:03,571 --> 01:03:05,155 - Yes. 1080 01:03:05,156 --> 01:03:06,756 - It says here you're a blonde. Are you? 1081 01:03:07,742 --> 01:03:09,994 If you don't remember, perhaps Mr. Falk will. 1082 01:03:09,995 --> 01:03:10,912 - Brunette. 1083 01:03:10,913 --> 01:03:12,663 - We could play the tape again, maybe it's on there. 1084 01:03:12,664 --> 01:03:14,291 - I'm a brunette! 1085 01:03:15,625 --> 01:03:18,043 - Thank you. Now, let's see. 1086 01:03:18,044 --> 01:03:19,920 "Weight, 105?" 1087 01:03:19,921 --> 01:03:22,006 Yeah! In your bra. 1088 01:03:22,007 --> 01:03:23,173 - Your honor, I object! 1089 01:03:23,174 --> 01:03:24,050 - You would! 1090 01:03:24,051 --> 01:03:25,092 - Bastard! - Hag! 1091 01:03:25,093 --> 01:03:27,887 - Quiet! Overruled! Weight? 1092 01:03:29,973 --> 01:03:30,973 - 118. 1093 01:03:32,058 --> 01:03:34,769 All right, fine, fine. I'm 127. 1094 01:03:35,937 --> 01:03:37,938 - And it says here you were born in 1964, 1095 01:03:37,939 --> 01:03:40,607 but that's not true either, is it? 1096 01:03:40,608 --> 01:03:42,401 Is it? 1097 01:03:42,402 --> 01:03:43,569 - Can you tell me what it says here 1098 01:03:43,570 --> 01:03:46,447 on your birth certificate under "date of birth." 1099 01:03:46,448 --> 01:03:47,531 - Your honor, I object. 1100 01:03:47,532 --> 01:03:49,158 What does this have to do with anything? 1101 01:03:49,159 --> 01:03:51,911 - Overruled. Mrs. Cole, answer the question. 1102 01:03:53,621 --> 01:03:54,621 - "1965." 1103 01:03:56,458 --> 01:03:57,959 - Now let me get this straight. 1104 01:03:59,002 --> 01:04:01,920 That would mean that you lied about your age 1105 01:04:01,921 --> 01:04:03,922 to make yourself older. 1106 01:04:03,923 --> 01:04:07,218 But why would any woman wanna do that? 1107 01:04:08,345 --> 01:04:10,888 - I changed it so I could get married. 1108 01:04:10,889 --> 01:04:14,934 - And the truth shall set you free! 1109 01:04:16,227 --> 01:04:18,145 My client lied about her age! 1110 01:04:18,146 --> 01:04:20,064 She was only 17 when she got married, 1111 01:04:20,065 --> 01:04:21,857 which makes her a minor, 1112 01:04:21,858 --> 01:04:23,567 and in the great state of California, 1113 01:04:23,568 --> 01:04:26,195 no minor can enter into any legal contract, 1114 01:04:26,196 --> 01:04:29,114 without parental consent, including... 1115 01:04:29,115 --> 01:04:30,407 - Prenuptial agreements. 1116 01:04:30,408 --> 01:04:33,994 - Prenuptial agreements! - This contract is void! 1117 01:04:33,995 --> 01:04:35,329 The fact that my client has been ridden 1118 01:04:35,330 --> 01:04:37,748 more than Seattle slew is irrelevant. 1119 01:04:37,749 --> 01:04:39,500 Standard community property applies 1120 01:04:39,501 --> 01:04:41,585 and she is entitled half of the marital assets 1121 01:04:41,586 --> 01:04:43,546 or $11.395 million! 1122 01:04:44,547 --> 01:04:47,759 Jordan fades back. And that's the game! 1123 01:04:49,219 --> 01:04:51,929 Nothing further, your honor. 1124 01:04:58,728 --> 01:05:00,145 - Order. 1125 01:05:01,773 --> 01:05:02,773 Order! 1126 01:05:05,819 --> 01:05:07,403 In light of this new evidence, 1127 01:05:07,404 --> 01:05:10,114 the court must rule in favor of Mrs. Cole. 1128 01:05:10,115 --> 01:05:13,867 She is hereby awarded half the marital assets. 1129 01:05:15,787 --> 01:05:18,288 The son of a bitch pulled it off! 1130 01:05:18,289 --> 01:05:19,873 - I didn't know she was under age! 1131 01:05:19,874 --> 01:05:22,126 - It doesn't matter. - The contract's void. 1132 01:05:23,003 --> 01:05:26,256 Order. Order. 1133 01:05:27,340 --> 01:05:29,508 I understand both parties have agreed 1134 01:05:29,509 --> 01:05:31,468 to joint custody, is that correct? 1135 01:05:31,469 --> 01:05:32,761 - Yes. - Yes. 1136 01:05:32,762 --> 01:05:35,806 - No. I'm contesting custody. 1137 01:05:35,807 --> 01:05:36,641 - What? 1138 01:05:36,642 --> 01:05:37,975 - If I get sole custody of the kids, 1139 01:05:37,976 --> 01:05:40,978 that's another $10,000 in child support payments. 1140 01:05:40,979 --> 01:05:42,896 - You just won $11 million! 1141 01:05:42,897 --> 01:05:45,983 - Hey, I'm the victim here, you said it yourself. 1142 01:05:45,984 --> 01:05:47,819 Now I'm gonna hit him where it hurts. 1143 01:05:49,821 --> 01:05:50,821 - But you... 1144 01:05:51,656 --> 01:05:54,450 You said he was a good father. 1145 01:05:58,371 --> 01:06:00,205 - Well, Mr. Reede, 1146 01:06:00,206 --> 01:06:03,084 do we have an agreement on custody or not? 1147 01:06:06,754 --> 01:06:07,754 - No. 1148 01:06:08,882 --> 01:06:09,882 - I see. 1149 01:06:11,134 --> 01:06:12,342 In that case, there will be 1150 01:06:12,343 --> 01:06:16,388 a custody hearing, on the 19th at 9:00 A.M. 1151 01:06:16,389 --> 01:06:17,890 Court is adjourned. 1152 01:06:25,815 --> 01:06:27,357 - Come on, let's go. - Daddy! 1153 01:06:27,358 --> 01:06:29,318 - You stop whining, or I'll give you 1154 01:06:29,319 --> 01:06:30,360 something to whine about! 1155 01:06:30,361 --> 01:06:32,863 - I wanna go with daddy! 1156 01:06:32,864 --> 01:06:34,198 - Oh, come here, kids, come on. 1157 01:06:34,199 --> 01:06:36,200 It's all right. Don't you worry. 1158 01:06:36,201 --> 01:06:39,912 I promise we'll be together, whatever I have to do. 1159 01:06:39,913 --> 01:06:41,622 It's okay. It's okay. 1160 01:06:41,623 --> 01:06:44,625 - Oh, for god's sake, will you give me those? They're mine! 1161 01:06:44,626 --> 01:06:47,544 Let go of daddy! Let go of him! Let go of daddy! 1162 01:06:47,545 --> 01:06:50,839 We're leaving now! Lupe, come on! 1163 01:06:50,840 --> 01:06:52,966 Don't you have some checks to write? 1164 01:06:52,967 --> 01:06:55,177 You haven't paid for them yet. 1165 01:07:06,981 --> 01:07:10,025 I love children. 1166 01:07:10,026 --> 01:07:12,819 They give you so much leverage in a case like this. 1167 01:07:12,820 --> 01:07:17,367 You did an incredible job, partner. 1168 01:07:19,118 --> 01:07:23,038 Look at him. He's stunned, he can't believe it. 1169 01:07:25,166 --> 01:07:28,377 - Your honor, may I please approach the bench? 1170 01:07:28,378 --> 01:07:30,337 - We're adjourned, Mr. Reede. 1171 01:07:30,338 --> 01:07:33,966 - Your honor, I think we've made a big mistake. 1172 01:07:33,967 --> 01:07:36,760 - Mr. Reede, I am tired and very cranky. 1173 01:07:36,761 --> 01:07:40,514 - I know, but this is just wrong, isn't it? 1174 01:07:40,515 --> 01:07:43,684 I manipulated the system, just because you bought it 1175 01:07:43,685 --> 01:07:45,812 doesn't mean I'm right, it's a technicality! 1176 01:07:46,813 --> 01:07:49,773 - Young man, having my judgment mocked in my own court, 1177 01:07:49,774 --> 01:07:52,651 is not something I'm prepared to tolerate! 1178 01:07:52,652 --> 01:07:54,027 - Well, maybe you can tell that to the kids 1179 01:07:54,028 --> 01:07:56,780 when they're adopted by the manson family! 1180 01:07:56,781 --> 01:07:59,157 - One more word out of you, Mr. Reede, 1181 01:07:59,158 --> 01:08:00,909 and I'll hold you in contempt! 1182 01:08:00,910 --> 01:08:04,496 - I hold myself in contempt! 1183 01:08:04,497 --> 01:08:06,373 Why should you be any different? 1184 01:08:06,374 --> 01:08:07,708 - Bailiff, take him away! 1185 01:08:07,709 --> 01:08:11,545 - This man is a good father, and children are not leverage! 1186 01:08:11,546 --> 01:08:12,963 Oh, no, don't do this! 1187 01:08:12,964 --> 01:08:16,008 I have a date to play ball with my son! 1188 01:08:16,009 --> 01:08:19,261 I can't be late! It's my last chance! 1189 01:08:19,262 --> 01:08:20,638 I'm Jose canseco! 1190 01:08:21,639 --> 01:08:23,016 I'm Jose canseco! 1191 01:08:28,896 --> 01:08:30,188 Phone call! Phone call! 1192 01:08:30,189 --> 01:08:35,153 I get a phone call! I get a phone call! I get a phone call! 1193 01:08:37,530 --> 01:08:38,448 - Hello? 1194 01:08:38,448 --> 01:08:39,282 - Audrey, it's me. 1195 01:08:39,283 --> 01:08:40,699 For the love of god, don't hang up! 1196 01:08:40,700 --> 01:08:41,992 - I can't talk to you right now. 1197 01:08:41,993 --> 01:08:43,243 Our flight leaves at 8:00. 1198 01:08:43,244 --> 01:08:44,328 - What? 1199 01:08:44,329 --> 01:08:45,621 - I'm taking Max some place 1200 01:08:45,622 --> 01:08:47,581 where you can't do this to him anymore. 1201 01:08:47,582 --> 01:08:50,292 - Audrey, wait! The most amazing thing has happened to me. 1202 01:08:50,293 --> 01:08:51,418 I swear, I'm a changed man! 1203 01:08:51,419 --> 01:08:55,005 Just come to the courthouse with $1,000 and bail me out. 1204 01:08:56,674 --> 01:08:58,383 Hello? Hello! 1205 01:08:58,384 --> 01:08:59,218 - Time's up, pal. 1206 01:08:59,219 --> 01:09:01,762 - No, just one more call. Just one more call. 1207 01:09:05,475 --> 01:09:07,643 - Okay. Let's go. 1208 01:09:09,145 --> 01:09:10,145 You ready? 1209 01:09:10,814 --> 01:09:12,439 Will you get the door, please? 1210 01:09:14,400 --> 01:09:15,400 - Thank you. 1211 01:09:16,361 --> 01:09:17,361 - Mr. Reede, 1212 01:09:18,821 --> 01:09:19,821 you made bail. 1213 01:09:20,531 --> 01:09:21,698 - Greta! 1214 01:09:21,699 --> 01:09:23,325 Oh! Thank god! 1215 01:09:23,326 --> 01:09:26,119 - Am I too late? Have you been sexually molested yet? 1216 01:09:26,120 --> 01:09:27,954 Because I could circle the block. 1217 01:09:30,583 --> 01:09:31,501 How did you know I was here? 1218 01:09:31,502 --> 01:09:33,794 - One of the other secretaries called me at home, 1219 01:09:33,795 --> 01:09:36,380 said you went all noble in front of Mr. Allan. 1220 01:09:36,381 --> 01:09:39,091 - Yeah, I think I'm fired. Isn't that great? 1221 01:09:39,092 --> 01:09:41,593 Maybe I'll start my own firm. Do you need a job? 1222 01:09:41,594 --> 01:09:43,303 - I don't think you can afford me. 1223 01:09:48,267 --> 01:09:49,685 - Oh man, I got to get my car. 1224 01:09:49,686 --> 01:09:50,811 Audrey's on her way to the airport. 1225 01:09:50,812 --> 01:09:52,020 I could lose Max forever. 1226 01:09:52,021 --> 01:09:53,940 I can't let that happen. I love him! 1227 01:09:54,816 --> 01:09:57,025 You know, this truth stuff is pretty cool. 1228 01:09:57,026 --> 01:10:00,154 I love my son! 1229 01:10:01,406 --> 01:10:04,450 I love my son! 1230 01:10:05,535 --> 01:10:08,578 Hey, need some change? Take everything! 1231 01:10:11,165 --> 01:10:13,333 But it's not gonna make you happy. 1232 01:10:13,334 --> 01:10:16,587 I love my son! 1233 01:10:17,880 --> 01:10:19,006 I love my son! 1234 01:10:22,385 --> 01:10:24,553 - Hey, there you are! - Hi. 1235 01:10:24,554 --> 01:10:25,596 - Just in time. 1236 01:10:26,597 --> 01:10:30,100 Oh! This is the happiest moment of my entire life. 1237 01:10:30,101 --> 01:10:31,560 - Oh! 1238 01:10:31,561 --> 01:10:33,145 Well, mine... 1239 01:10:33,146 --> 01:10:36,231 Well, ours also. 1240 01:10:36,232 --> 01:10:39,235 - Hey, gipper. I have something for you, young man. 1241 01:10:40,778 --> 01:10:44,698 Oh! Watch yourself, it's the claw! 1242 01:10:44,699 --> 01:10:46,366 Oh! The claw's coming at you. 1243 01:10:46,367 --> 01:10:49,954 Oh! You're scared of the claw. You're scared of the claw. 1244 01:10:51,372 --> 01:10:52,748 - Jerry. 1245 01:10:52,749 --> 01:10:54,291 Jerry. 1246 01:10:54,292 --> 01:10:56,042 It's okay. You don't have to... 1247 01:10:56,043 --> 01:11:00,297 Tower air flight 1511 to Boston is now boarding. 1248 01:11:00,298 --> 01:11:01,715 - That's us. - Yeah. 1249 01:11:01,716 --> 01:11:02,758 - You ready to go? 1250 01:11:02,759 --> 01:11:04,926 - Yes. You ready? 1251 01:11:04,927 --> 01:11:05,927 - Okay. - Great. 1252 01:11:15,021 --> 01:11:16,021 - Excuse me! 1253 01:11:17,106 --> 01:11:20,192 What gate is flight 1511 leaving from? It's an emergency! 1254 01:11:20,193 --> 01:11:22,152 - Gate number 123, but you'll never make it. 1255 01:11:22,153 --> 01:11:23,236 The flight's already boarding. 1256 01:11:23,237 --> 01:11:25,989 It takes a half hour to get through security. 1257 01:11:25,990 --> 01:11:27,824 If you wanna go to Boston, there's another flight 1258 01:11:27,825 --> 01:11:29,534 leaving tomorrow morning at 7:00. 1259 01:11:29,535 --> 01:11:30,535 Flight number 120... 1260 01:11:34,540 --> 01:11:36,416 Lady and gentlemen, welcome aboard 1261 01:11:36,417 --> 01:11:40,003 flight 1511, from Los Angeles to Boston's Logan airport. 1262 01:11:40,004 --> 01:11:42,423 We'll be departing shortly, if you need help... 1263 01:11:43,382 --> 01:11:44,217 - Honey, can I help you with those? 1264 01:11:44,217 --> 01:11:45,217 - I'm fine. 1265 01:11:46,719 --> 01:11:47,553 - Are you sure? 1266 01:11:47,554 --> 01:11:49,221 - Jerry, I can open the bag! 1267 01:11:51,390 --> 01:11:53,642 - Would you like anything to drink before takeoff? 1268 01:11:53,643 --> 01:11:55,895 - Yes. Anything with alcohol, please. 1269 01:11:56,979 --> 01:11:57,979 - Audrey. 1270 01:11:59,899 --> 01:12:01,149 Now, if you'll focus on the screen 1271 01:12:01,150 --> 01:12:03,443 ahead of you, we will be running the safety video. 1272 01:12:03,444 --> 01:12:05,278 - How about that drink? 1273 01:12:27,802 --> 01:12:29,302 - Max! 1274 01:12:29,303 --> 01:12:30,303 Max! 1275 01:12:32,515 --> 01:12:33,515 Max! 1276 01:12:35,560 --> 01:12:36,560 Wait! 1277 01:12:42,441 --> 01:12:44,442 That ought to do it. 1278 01:12:48,781 --> 01:12:51,366 - Thanks! It's running great! 1279 01:13:18,561 --> 01:13:19,769 Max! 1280 01:13:19,770 --> 01:13:20,770 I'm coming! 1281 01:13:32,116 --> 01:13:33,700 Max! 1282 01:13:42,960 --> 01:13:44,252 Max! 1283 01:13:44,253 --> 01:13:45,796 Max! Where are you? 1284 01:13:51,886 --> 01:13:52,886 - I love you. 1285 01:13:55,806 --> 01:13:56,806 - Thank you. 1286 01:13:58,351 --> 01:14:01,227 - That wasn't exactly the answer I was looking for. 1287 01:14:01,228 --> 01:14:03,522 Thank you very much. 1288 01:14:08,361 --> 01:14:10,570 I'm sorry. It's just... 1289 01:14:10,571 --> 01:14:12,405 - Too fast? It was too fast, wasn't it? 1290 01:14:12,406 --> 01:14:13,949 - No, it's... 1291 01:14:13,950 --> 01:14:15,909 - Chemistry? Whatever it is, we can work on it. 1292 01:14:15,910 --> 01:14:18,203 - No, no, no. It's just that... 1293 01:14:18,204 --> 01:14:20,497 - Oh my god, it's Fletcher! 1294 01:14:20,498 --> 01:14:23,166 - No, no. This has nothing to do with Fletcher 1295 01:14:23,167 --> 01:14:26,628 - it's Fletcher. - What? 1296 01:14:26,629 --> 01:14:27,629 - Dad? 1297 01:14:29,048 --> 01:14:34,010 - I made it! I'm late, but I made it! 1298 01:14:34,011 --> 01:14:35,971 - What is he doing? 1299 01:14:35,972 --> 01:14:37,640 - He came to see us off. Wave. 1300 01:14:43,145 --> 01:14:44,772 - I won't let you go! 1301 01:14:53,239 --> 01:14:54,322 Oh! Shit! 1302 01:15:00,371 --> 01:15:04,374 - Control 19, this is tower 1511 heavy, ready for takeoff. 1303 01:15:11,674 --> 01:15:12,508 - What was that? 1304 01:15:12,509 --> 01:15:14,467 - Looked like a shoe. 1305 01:15:14,468 --> 01:15:15,468 - Pull over! 1306 01:15:16,762 --> 01:15:18,680 Pull this thing over! 1307 01:15:18,681 --> 01:15:21,850 - Control 19, some idiot has hijacked a flight of stairs. 1308 01:15:21,851 --> 01:15:22,976 We're gonna stopping this plane. 1309 01:15:22,977 --> 01:15:24,602 19 control, we copy. 1310 01:15:28,607 --> 01:15:29,650 - Yeah! 1311 01:16:08,397 --> 01:16:11,107 Yeah 1312 01:16:11,108 --> 01:16:14,903 you people are all doing a wonderful job! 1313 01:16:14,904 --> 01:16:15,821 - That's far enough, folks. 1314 01:16:15,822 --> 01:16:18,948 - Yeah, he's my husband. - He was my husband. 1315 01:16:18,949 --> 01:16:19,784 - All right, go ahead. 1316 01:16:19,784 --> 01:16:20,618 Okay. 1317 01:16:20,619 --> 01:16:24,245 Max, you stay here with Jerry, and I'll be right back, okay. 1318 01:16:27,416 --> 01:16:28,416 - Audrey! - Fletcher! 1319 01:16:28,417 --> 01:16:30,085 - Great news! 1320 01:16:30,086 --> 01:16:31,252 Both my legs are broken, 1321 01:16:31,253 --> 01:16:33,254 so they can't take me right to jail. 1322 01:16:33,255 --> 01:16:36,091 - Fletcher, what were you doing? Are you out of your mind? 1323 01:16:36,092 --> 01:16:40,970 - No, I'm thinking clear. - I've never been this clear! 1324 01:16:40,971 --> 01:16:41,971 - Dad? 1325 01:16:43,140 --> 01:16:44,140 - Creep. 1326 01:16:45,309 --> 01:16:46,434 - He was getting kind of upset. 1327 01:16:46,435 --> 01:16:48,603 - Are you all right? 1328 01:16:50,773 --> 01:16:52,066 I'm hurting here, though. 1329 01:16:53,275 --> 01:16:54,610 I'm a dope, Max. 1330 01:16:55,736 --> 01:16:57,320 All this time, you've been here, 1331 01:16:57,321 --> 01:17:00,157 and I could see you anytime I felt like it, but I didn't. 1332 01:17:01,408 --> 01:17:03,159 Then your mom told me you were moving to Boston, 1333 01:17:03,160 --> 01:17:04,328 and I started thinking. 1334 01:17:05,287 --> 01:17:07,289 I could be sitting around sometime and 1335 01:17:08,290 --> 01:17:11,794 wanna look at you and hold you and play with you, 1336 01:17:13,420 --> 01:17:14,505 and I won't be able to. 1337 01:17:16,632 --> 01:17:18,884 I don't think I'm gonna do too well with that. 1338 01:17:21,011 --> 01:17:24,514 I love you more than anything else in the world, Max, 1339 01:17:24,515 --> 01:17:26,183 and you know it's true. 1340 01:17:27,143 --> 01:17:29,520 I couldn't say it if it wasn't true, not today. 1341 01:17:32,148 --> 01:17:37,111 I love you, and I'll never hurt you again. 1342 01:17:41,073 --> 01:17:44,159 - He's telling the truth, mom. He's not allowed to lie. 1343 01:17:44,160 --> 01:17:45,285 I made a wish, and anything 1344 01:17:45,286 --> 01:17:47,954 dad says today has to be the truth. 1345 01:17:47,955 --> 01:17:49,247 - Max. 1346 01:17:51,041 --> 01:17:52,041 It's 8:45. 1347 01:17:53,460 --> 01:17:54,920 You made the wish at 8:15. 1348 01:17:55,838 --> 01:17:58,132 I've been able to lie for the last half-hour. 1349 01:17:59,091 --> 01:18:01,384 - So you weren't... - No, it was the truth! 1350 01:18:01,385 --> 01:18:03,553 I just wanted to be honest with you. 1351 01:18:03,554 --> 01:18:05,347 I always wanna be honest with you. 1352 01:18:12,313 --> 01:18:13,313 - Mom, 1353 01:18:14,565 --> 01:18:16,983 do we have to go to Boston? 1354 01:18:21,947 --> 01:18:23,532 - No, Max, you don't have to go. 1355 01:18:28,162 --> 01:18:31,707 - I, on the other hand, do have to, a hospital to run. 1356 01:18:34,251 --> 01:18:36,754 That's an open-ended ticket if you ever change your mind. 1357 01:18:37,880 --> 01:18:38,880 - Thank you. 1358 01:18:44,220 --> 01:18:45,929 - Looks like he's got his father back. 1359 01:18:45,930 --> 01:18:48,514 Yeah. 1360 01:18:54,438 --> 01:18:59,360 J“ happy birthday, dear Maximus j“ 1361 01:19:00,569 --> 01:19:03,864 j“ happy birthday to you j“ 1362 01:19:07,117 --> 01:19:08,451 - okay, Max, make a wish. 1363 01:19:08,452 --> 01:19:12,914 - Ah! Wait! I don't know if we should do this. 1364 01:19:12,915 --> 01:19:14,499 - Oh, Fletcher, come on. 1365 01:19:14,500 --> 01:19:16,502 What are the odds of that happening again? 1366 01:19:18,963 --> 01:19:21,339 - Yeah, I guess you're right. 1367 01:19:21,340 --> 01:19:22,633 Okay, Max, go ahead. 1368 01:19:30,683 --> 01:19:31,683 - Mom? Dad? 1369 01:19:48,784 --> 01:19:49,993 - Max! 1370 01:19:54,081 --> 01:19:57,417 Did you wish for your mom and I to get back together again? 1371 01:19:57,418 --> 01:19:59,378 - No, I wished for roller blades. 1372 01:20:03,590 --> 01:20:05,342 - Do you wanna cut the cake, 1373 01:20:08,053 --> 01:20:09,679 dad? 1374 01:20:09,680 --> 01:20:10,806 - I'd love to. 1375 01:20:12,016 --> 01:20:14,142 But I have this horrible pain in my arm. 1376 01:20:14,143 --> 01:20:16,144 Oh! No! It's the claw! 1377 01:20:16,145 --> 01:20:20,440 No one can stop the claw! 1378 01:20:20,441 --> 01:20:23,359 No one can stop it! 1379 01:20:29,033 --> 01:20:31,160 Nothing can stop the claw! 1380 01:20:54,725 --> 01:20:55,976 If I was a boxer I would 1381 01:20:56,977 --> 01:20:59,228 bounce those things like sugar ray Leonard. 1382 01:20:59,229 --> 01:21:00,229 I'm sorry. 1383 01:21:02,858 --> 01:21:04,609 You brought your kids to your divorce? 1384 01:21:04,610 --> 01:21:06,194 - Sympathy. - Well, it's working! 1385 01:21:06,195 --> 01:21:09,655 I feel sorry for them already. 1386 01:21:09,656 --> 01:21:12,784 For this you will pay a terrible price. 1387 01:21:15,746 --> 01:21:18,332 Well, it's working! I feel sorry for them already. 1388 01:21:31,929 --> 01:21:32,930 Mrs. Cole. 1389 01:21:46,944 --> 01:21:47,944 A goose! 1390 01:21:51,865 --> 01:21:52,825 Including... 1391 01:21:52,826 --> 01:21:54,367 - Prenuptial agreements. 1392 01:21:54,368 --> 01:21:56,328 - Prenuptial agreements! 1393 01:22:04,628 --> 01:22:07,880 No! I'd have got him $10,000. 1394 01:22:07,881 --> 01:22:08,715 Good-bye, Mr. Reede. 1395 01:22:08,716 --> 01:22:13,387 No! Wait! I didn't understand... 1396 01:22:36,160 --> 01:22:40,037 Shit. I can't do it. 1397 01:22:40,038 --> 01:22:41,205 Now, let's see. 1398 01:22:41,206 --> 01:22:44,083 "Weight, 105?" 1399 01:22:44,084 --> 01:22:46,085 Yeah, in your bra. 1400 01:22:46,086 --> 01:22:47,086 - Your honor, I object! 1401 01:22:47,087 --> 01:22:48,005 - You would! 1402 01:22:48,006 --> 01:22:49,672 - Over actor! - Jezebel! 1403 01:22:55,220 --> 01:22:58,015 - He put me up to it. Tom shadyac. 1404 01:22:59,808 --> 01:23:00,975 - Yeah, sure he did. 1405 01:23:00,976 --> 01:23:02,393 - Oh, he did. 1406 01:23:02,394 --> 01:23:05,271 Oh, no. 1407 01:23:05,272 --> 01:23:06,481 They're onto me.