1
00:00:05,705 --> 00:00:08,741
Captioning made possible by
comedy central

2
00:00:09,175 --> 00:00:10,693
? I'm going down
to south park?

3
00:00:10,728 --> 00:00:12,120
? Gonna have
myself a time?

4
00:00:12,155 --> 00:00:13,478
? Friendly faces
everywhere?

5
00:00:13,513 --> 00:00:15,248
? Humble folks
without temptation?

6
00:00:15,283 --> 00:00:17,000
? Going down
to south park?

7
00:00:17,035 --> 00:00:18,527
? Gonna leave my
woes behind?

8
00:00:18,562 --> 00:00:20,019
? Ample parking
day or night?

9
00:00:20,453 --> 00:00:21,754
? People spouting
"howdy neighbor"?

10
00:00:22,188 --> 00:00:23,055
? Headin' on up
to south park?

11
00:00:23,489 --> 00:00:25,224
? Gonna see
if i can't unwind?

12
00:00:28,694 --> 00:00:30,429
? So come on down
to south park?

13
00:00:30,464 --> 00:00:32,164
? And meet some
friends of mine?

14
00:00:33,666 --> 00:00:35,366
And so it is
with heavy hearts

15
00:00:35,401 --> 00:00:38,220
That we say good-Bye
to mabel louise cartman.

16
00:00:38,255 --> 00:00:41,040
She was a good woman,
a community leader,

17
00:00:41,474 --> 00:00:44,076
A caring wife,
providing mother,

18
00:00:44,111 --> 00:00:47,980
And a loving
grandmother.

19
00:00:48,015 --> 00:00:48,848
Mom, it's 3:30,

20
00:00:49,282 --> 00:00:50,583
This is taking up
my whole saturday.

21
00:00:50,618 --> 00:00:51,849
Shh, pumpkin,
it's almost over.

22
00:00:51,884 --> 00:00:54,486
Why couldn't the funeral
have been on a school day?

23
00:00:54,521 --> 00:00:57,089
And now, let us bow our heads
in a moment of silence

24
00:00:57,124 --> 00:01:00,126
And reflect on how
mabel touched our lives.

25
00:01:00,161 --> 00:01:01,826
God, she didn't take
this long to die.

26
00:01:01,861 --> 00:01:05,296
And now we release the doves
to symbolize the lord

27
00:01:05,331 --> 00:01:10,536
Taking mabel into his arms and
giving her everlasting peace.

28
00:01:14,440 --> 00:01:16,140
Peace.

29
00:01:16,175 --> 00:01:17,441
Great,
now can we go?

30
00:01:17,476 --> 00:01:20,079
No, sweetie, we have to tend to
some of grandma's business.

31
00:01:20,114 --> 00:01:23,514
Ohh!
God damn it!

32
00:01:23,549 --> 00:01:25,718
"And so i leave
my stocks and bonds

33
00:01:26,152 --> 00:01:28,286
"Worth an estimated $14.12

34
00:01:28,321 --> 00:01:30,489
To be divided amongst
my loving family."

35
00:01:30,524 --> 00:01:32,224
Mom, i wanna go home!

36
00:01:32,658 --> 00:01:34,358
In a minute, sweetie,
this is important.

37
00:01:34,393 --> 00:01:37,430
"My loving son, stinky, i leave
you the house in nebraska.

38
00:01:37,465 --> 00:01:39,165
Look after it as your
father and i did."

39
00:01:39,599 --> 00:01:40,900
Blah, blah,
blah, blah, blah.

40
00:01:40,935 --> 00:01:42,166
"To my grandson, eric,

41
00:01:42,201 --> 00:01:44,370
"You were always my favorite,
fat little man,

42
00:01:44,405 --> 00:01:46,539
My perfect round little
pudding piler."

43
00:01:46,574 --> 00:01:47,840
Oh god, you have to
embarrass me,

44
00:01:47,875 --> 00:01:48,708
Even in death, grandma.

45
00:01:49,141 --> 00:01:51,744
"For you, eric, i leave,
from my life's savings,

46
00:01:51,779 --> 00:01:53,913
"The sum of
one million dollars

47
00:01:54,347 --> 00:01:56,082
To be transferred
to you immediately."

48
00:01:56,117 --> 00:01:57,617
Whosa-Jigga-What?

49
00:01:57,652 --> 00:01:59,083
A million dollars?

50
00:01:59,118 --> 00:02:01,287
"Eric is the primary
benefactor of my estate

51
00:02:01,721 --> 00:02:03,022
"Since it is likely
the rest of you

52
00:02:03,057 --> 00:02:04,323
Would spend the money
on crack."

53
00:02:04,358 --> 00:02:05,191
Oh my.

54
00:02:05,625 --> 00:02:06,709
That can't be!

55
00:02:06,744 --> 00:02:07,793
Excuse me.

56
00:02:08,227 --> 00:02:10,830
Does this mean i have
one million dollars?

57
00:02:10,865 --> 00:02:12,565
Yes, eric, it's yours.

58
00:02:12,999 --> 00:02:14,265
No way, you don't
understand.

59
00:02:14,300 --> 00:02:16,035
Since i was two years old
it has been my dream

60
00:02:16,469 --> 00:02:17,770
To have one
million dollars.

61
00:02:17,805 --> 00:02:19,939
And now, you do.

62
00:02:19,974 --> 00:02:22,108
Oh.

63
00:02:34,253 --> 00:02:35,519
There you are,
jennifer lopez!

64
00:02:35,554 --> 00:02:37,289
You've been most
uncooperative, miss lopez.

65
00:02:37,324 --> 00:02:38,556
No, please!

66
00:02:38,591 --> 00:02:40,326
I promise i'll never make
another album or movie.

67
00:02:40,361 --> 00:02:42,061
It's too late
for that, miss lopez.

68
00:02:42,096 --> 00:02:44,230
Have mercy!

69
00:02:46,832 --> 00:02:49,400
Yeah-Ha!
Awesome!

70
00:02:49,435 --> 00:02:53,773
You guys, you guys!

71
00:02:53,808 --> 00:02:55,906
Why?

72
00:02:55,941 --> 00:02:58,327
Because!

73
00:02:58,362 --> 00:03:00,678
Nah-Uh.

74
00:03:00,713 --> 00:03:02,882
No, swear to god,
it's true...

75
00:03:02,917 --> 00:03:05,051
You better not
be lying, kenny.

76
00:03:07,219 --> 00:03:11,956
999,400...
999,500...

77
00:03:11,991 --> 00:03:13,726
Damn, dan, i've never
seen that much cash.

78
00:03:13,761 --> 00:03:14,992
Me neither.

79
00:03:15,027 --> 00:03:19,330
999,900...
one million.

80
00:03:19,365 --> 00:03:21,499
Look at it,
look at it, mother.

81
00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:24,570
See how the light reflects the
spearmint green from its surface.

82
00:03:24,605 --> 00:03:26,704
Eric, that is
a lot of money.

83
00:03:26,739 --> 00:03:28,474
Don't you think you should keep it
in the bank instead of at your house?

84
00:03:28,509 --> 00:03:31,077
I'm not keeping it,
mr. Garrison, i'm spending it.

85
00:03:31,112 --> 00:03:32,395
On what?

86
00:03:32,430 --> 00:03:33,644
On my dream,

87
00:03:33,679 --> 00:03:36,716
On the one thing i've wanted
ever since i can remember.

88
00:03:41,053 --> 00:03:42,788
Excuse me, son, i'm
an investment broker,

89
00:03:42,823 --> 00:03:44,090
I can help you
invest that money.

90
00:03:44,125 --> 00:03:45,356
Nah-Uh,
i'm spending it.

91
00:03:45,391 --> 00:03:48,861
Eric, god could sure use that
money for a bigger church.

92
00:03:48,896 --> 00:03:50,561
I think god has
plenty of money.

93
00:03:50,596 --> 00:03:52,331
What the hell are
you doing, fat-Ass?

94
00:03:52,765 --> 00:03:55,801
Not much, just taking my one
million dollars out of the bank.

95
00:03:55,836 --> 00:03:58,803
Oh my god.
Kenny wasn't lying.

96
00:03:58,838 --> 00:04:01,006
Would you mind stepping aside,
i've got a purchase to make.

97
00:04:01,440 --> 00:04:03,609
Dude, can you loan me
20 bucks for a new jacket?

98
00:04:03,644 --> 00:04:05,795
Ha! If you need money
you can get a job, stan!

99
00:04:05,830 --> 00:04:07,756
No freeloaders are gonna
take my hard-Earned cash.

100
00:04:07,791 --> 00:04:09,682
Your grandma left it to you,
you didn't earn it!

101
00:04:09,717 --> 00:04:10,948
Didn't earn it?

102
00:04:10,983 --> 00:04:12,718
What about all the years i spent
making grandma like me?

103
00:04:13,152 --> 00:04:14,887
All the wet, spit-Filled
kisses i put up with.

104
00:04:15,321 --> 00:04:17,455
The constant smell
of aspirin and pee.

105
00:04:17,490 --> 00:04:20,092
Don't tell me i didn't earn it,
you son of a bitch!

106
00:04:20,127 --> 00:04:22,712
No, no,
this is impossible.

107
00:04:22,747 --> 00:04:25,262
Yeah, it's unbelievable.

108
00:04:25,297 --> 00:04:27,431
No, i mean this is
impossible, stan.

109
00:04:27,466 --> 00:04:29,201
Cartman is the biggest
asshole in the world.

110
00:04:29,236 --> 00:04:30,936
How is it that god gives him
a million dollars?

111
00:04:31,370 --> 00:04:33,539
Come on, we gotta see what
cartman is doing with his money.

112
00:04:33,574 --> 00:04:35,239
Why, how could you
do this?

113
00:04:35,274 --> 00:04:37,659
There are people
starving in alabama

114
00:04:37,694 --> 00:04:40,045
And you give cartman
a million dollars?

115
00:04:40,913 --> 00:04:43,949
And if we can just get you
to sign here, and here.

116
00:04:43,984 --> 00:04:45,251
You're sure this is what
you want, sweetie?

117
00:04:45,684 --> 00:04:47,419
My own amusement park,
mother, i'm sure.

118
00:04:47,853 --> 00:04:50,890
And now you just
sign here mr. Foon.

119
00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:53,926
I can't do it.

120
00:04:53,961 --> 00:04:55,192
What?
What?

121
00:04:55,227 --> 00:04:56,529
I can't sell this
poor kid my park.

122
00:04:56,962 --> 00:04:59,530
Look, i haven't been
honest with you.

123
00:04:59,565 --> 00:05:01,300
The park hasn't been
doing great business.

124
00:05:01,335 --> 00:05:02,168
Frank, shh.

125
00:05:02,601 --> 00:05:03,868
It ain't right, chris.

126
00:05:03,903 --> 00:05:05,638
The truth is, the park
is a financial flop.

127
00:05:05,673 --> 00:05:07,173
I haven't turned
a profit in years

128
00:05:07,208 --> 00:05:08,639
Because i can't keep
attendance up.

129
00:05:08,674 --> 00:05:10,409
Oh, but i'm not buying the park
to get people to come.

130
00:05:10,444 --> 00:05:12,144
You- You're not?

131
00:05:12,578 --> 00:05:13,410
No, no, no.

132
00:05:13,445 --> 00:05:16,482
I'm buying it to
keep people out!

133
00:05:16,517 --> 00:05:17,783
Don't you see?

134
00:05:18,217 --> 00:05:19,952
Forever it has been my dream to
have my very own theme park,

135
00:05:20,386 --> 00:05:22,988
So that i could be alone in it
all day, every day.

136
00:05:23,023 --> 00:05:25,608
I love theme parks,
but the lines...

137
00:05:25,643 --> 00:05:28,194
Everywhere you go-
People, crowds.

138
00:05:28,229 --> 00:05:29,460
The rides are are great,

139
00:05:29,495 --> 00:05:31,447
But all the lines,
lines, lines!

140
00:05:31,482 --> 00:05:33,364
If there's
one thing i hate,

141
00:05:33,399 --> 00:05:38,604
All the lines, lines,
lines, lines!

142
00:05:39,038 --> 00:05:40,773
And then, there get to be
so many people

143
00:05:40,808 --> 00:05:42,508
That they make "fast pass".

144
00:05:42,942 --> 00:05:44,677
So then there's lines
for fast pass.

145
00:05:45,110 --> 00:05:47,713
You sign in line to get a ticket
to stand in line later.

146
00:05:47,748 --> 00:05:50,316
Then there's lines for the
bathrooms, lines for drinks.

147
00:05:50,749 --> 00:05:54,220
Lines for kartankulas
and rare kartankula plinks.

148
00:05:56,822 --> 00:05:58,991
And so you see,
this park is for me.

149
00:05:59,425 --> 00:06:01,125
Nobody else
will be allowed in.

150
00:06:01,160 --> 00:06:03,727
Oh well, then i guess
i don't feel bad.

151
00:06:03,762 --> 00:06:07,233
Mr. Cartman, congratulations,
the theme park is yours.

152
00:06:07,268 --> 00:06:09,835
Gentlemen, i thank you.

153
00:06:12,438 --> 00:06:14,607
Kyle?

154
00:06:15,908 --> 00:06:16,775
Dude, what are you
doing here?

155
00:06:17,209 --> 00:06:19,378
Everybody's
looking for you.

156
00:06:19,413 --> 00:06:20,246
Kyle?

157
00:06:20,679 --> 00:06:21,981
Do you know what happened
to me this morning, stan?

158
00:06:22,414 --> 00:06:25,885
This morning, i woke up and
felt a sharp pain in my ass.

159
00:06:25,920 --> 00:06:29,355
I felt down there and found
this big sore lump...

160
00:06:29,390 --> 00:06:31,090
On my ass, stan.

161
00:06:31,523 --> 00:06:32,790
I couldn't even
sit down, so,

162
00:06:32,825 --> 00:06:35,392
I had to tell my mom,
which was humiliating.

163
00:06:35,427 --> 00:06:38,030
She took me to the doctor,
which was more humiliating,

164
00:06:38,065 --> 00:06:41,465
And he told me...
i have a hemorrhoid.

165
00:06:41,500 --> 00:06:44,319
It's like an inflicted
blood vessel on your ass.

166
00:06:44,354 --> 00:06:47,139
I'm nine years old and
i have a hemorrhoid, stan.

167
00:06:47,174 --> 00:06:48,405
I have a hemorrhoid

168
00:06:48,440 --> 00:06:51,043
And cartman has
his own theme park.

169
00:06:51,078 --> 00:06:53,646
Kyle, i understand
what you mean, but-

170
00:06:53,681 --> 00:06:55,779
Do you, do you, stan?

171
00:06:55,814 --> 00:06:57,983
Because all my life i was
raised to believe in jehovah,

172
00:06:58,018 --> 00:06:59,718
To believe that we should all
behave a certain way

173
00:06:59,753 --> 00:07:01,418
And good things
will come to us.

174
00:07:01,453 --> 00:07:03,622
I make mistakes, but every week
i try to better myself.

175
00:07:04,056 --> 00:07:06,008
I'm always saying, "y'know,
i learned something today."

176
00:07:06,043 --> 00:07:07,960
And what does this so-Called
god give me in return?

177
00:07:07,995 --> 00:07:09,660
A hemorrhoid.

178
00:07:09,695 --> 00:07:12,298
He doesn't make sense-
What is your logic?!

179
00:07:12,333 --> 00:07:13,564
Ow.

180
00:07:13,599 --> 00:07:15,768
Look, cartman, he thinks
he's gonna be happy

181
00:07:15,803 --> 00:07:17,069
Because he has his own
amusement park,

182
00:07:17,503 --> 00:07:18,804
But he's gonna find out
that without other people

183
00:07:18,839 --> 00:07:20,539
The rides are
totally lame.

184
00:07:20,973 --> 00:07:23,575
I mean, who could really have
fun by themselves at a theme park?

185
00:07:24,009 --> 00:07:24,877
I bet he's
sick of it already.

186
00:07:25,311 --> 00:07:28,564
Yes! Yes!

187
00:07:28,599 --> 00:07:31,817
Awesome!

188
00:07:32,251 --> 00:07:33,951
Ho ho!

189
00:07:33,986 --> 00:07:36,553
Sweet, yes!

190
00:07:36,588 --> 00:07:39,624
Keep your arms and legs
inside the vehicle at all times.

191
00:07:39,659 --> 00:07:42,661
Make sure your seatbelt is
fastened, enjoy the mine shaft!

192
00:07:42,696 --> 00:07:44,396
Heh, heh, heh-Heh.

193
00:07:45,264 --> 00:07:48,734
Yes! Yes!

194
00:07:48,769 --> 00:07:52,169
Oh, cool!

195
00:07:52,204 --> 00:07:55,674
Oh, look how much
fun i had.

196
00:07:56,108 --> 00:07:58,277
Whoa!
Heh, heh, heh.

197
00:07:58,711 --> 00:07:59,543
Waa!
Heh, heh.

198
00:07:59,578 --> 00:08:01,712
Whoa!
Heh, heh, heh.

199
00:08:01,747 --> 00:08:05,651
Ooh, adventure island,
check it out, awesome!

200
00:08:06,085 --> 00:08:08,253
Woo hoo, yeah!

201
00:08:10,422 --> 00:08:13,024
I'm so happy.

202
00:08:13,059 --> 00:08:15,627
I'm so happy!

203
00:08:17,763 --> 00:08:19,463
Oh, hey, dude,

204
00:08:19,498 --> 00:08:20,799
"Terrance & phillip"
is just about to start.

205
00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:22,066
Great.

206
00:08:22,101 --> 00:08:23,367
What's that?
It's my seat ring.

207
00:08:23,402 --> 00:08:25,571
I have to sit on it
because of my hemorrhoid, ow.

208
00:08:25,606 --> 00:08:26,673
Heh, heh.

209
00:08:26,708 --> 00:08:27,705
Sorry.

210
00:08:27,740 --> 00:08:29,475
So, how are things going
at cartman's theme park?

211
00:08:29,510 --> 00:08:30,307
Dude,
just forget about it,

212
00:08:30,342 --> 00:08:32,077
We can't let him
get to us or he wins.

213
00:08:32,112 --> 00:08:32,945
I guess you're right.

214
00:08:33,379 --> 00:08:35,981
Hey, everybody check out
the all-New cartmanland!

215
00:08:36,016 --> 00:08:37,282
It's our grand opening!

216
00:08:37,716 --> 00:08:39,416
Cartmanland has over
100 fabulous rides,

217
00:08:39,451 --> 00:08:42,488
Six roller coasters,
and tons of great surprises.

218
00:08:42,523 --> 00:08:44,891
And the best part is,
you can't come!

219
00:08:44,926 --> 00:08:47,177
That's right,
because at cartmanland

220
00:08:47,212 --> 00:08:49,428
Only i, eric cartman,
can get in.

221
00:08:49,862 --> 00:08:52,898
That means only i can ride the
all-New tornado twister.

222
00:08:52,933 --> 00:08:55,032
A roller coaster that splashes
into water- Wow!

223
00:08:55,067 --> 00:08:57,236
It's the greatest amusement park
in the colorado area.

224
00:08:57,271 --> 00:09:00,706
And nobody can go.
Especially stan and kyle!

225
00:09:00,741 --> 00:09:02,406
Ha, ha, ha!

226
00:09:02,441 --> 00:09:03,707
So come on down to
cartmanland now,

227
00:09:03,742 --> 00:09:05,477
But don't plan on getting
past the parking lot,

228
00:09:05,512 --> 00:09:06,779
'Cause remember:

229
00:09:07,212 --> 00:09:10,249
? So much to do at cartmanland
but you can't come?

230
00:09:10,284 --> 00:09:11,784
Especially you,
stan and kyle.

231
00:09:11,819 --> 00:09:13,285
That does it!
Come on, dude.

232
00:09:13,719 --> 00:09:14,551
Where we going?

233
00:09:14,586 --> 00:09:15,454
We're getting into
that fat-Ass's park

234
00:09:15,888 --> 00:09:18,490
Whether he likes it
or not.

235
00:09:18,924 --> 00:09:20,659
Whoa!
Heh, heh.

236
00:09:20,694 --> 00:09:21,925
Whoa.

237
00:09:21,960 --> 00:09:23,695
Whoa!
Heh, heh, heh.

238
00:09:24,129 --> 00:09:25,829
Oh, man,
that was awesome!

239
00:09:25,864 --> 00:09:28,033
That one part with the spider
that dropped on you,

240
00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:31,503
Oh, man, that totally
got me, that was sweet.

241
00:09:31,538 --> 00:09:32,336
Help, help, help!

242
00:09:32,371 --> 00:09:34,540
Oh, that hurts!
What the hell?

243
00:09:34,575 --> 00:09:36,708
You sons of bitches!

244
00:09:36,743 --> 00:09:37,975
Come on, dude!

245
00:09:38,010 --> 00:09:39,745
Oh, god, i popped it.
Oh, it hurts!

246
00:09:39,780 --> 00:09:41,480
What the hell
are you doing?!

247
00:09:41,515 --> 00:09:42,312
Oh, crap.

248
00:09:42,347 --> 00:09:44,083
Oh, god, get me
off of here.

249
00:09:44,118 --> 00:09:45,783
Dude!

250
00:09:45,818 --> 00:09:47,986
Stan, i have to go home.

251
00:09:48,420 --> 00:09:51,023
I need my cream,
i need my cream!

252
00:09:51,058 --> 00:09:52,289
All right, let's go.

253
00:09:52,324 --> 00:09:53,625
That's right,
you stay out!

254
00:09:54,059 --> 00:09:55,325
You can't keep out forever,
you fat-Ass!

255
00:09:55,360 --> 00:09:57,096
We'll be back as soon as kyle's
hemorrhoid is better.

256
00:09:57,131 --> 00:09:58,631
My life can't
get any worse!

257
00:09:58,666 --> 00:10:00,132
You'll see,
we'll get in.

258
00:10:00,566 --> 00:10:03,567
All right, so listen.

259
00:10:03,602 --> 00:10:05,337
All i want you to do
is keep anybody out

260
00:10:05,372 --> 00:10:06,603
Who tries to get in here.

261
00:10:06,638 --> 00:10:08,338
If you see anybody
on my property,

262
00:10:08,373 --> 00:10:10,976
Especially stan and kyle,
you are to shoot on sight.

263
00:10:11,011 --> 00:10:13,110
So, what does
this job pay?

264
00:10:13,145 --> 00:10:14,880
All right, now this is very hard
for me to do, you understand.

265
00:10:15,314 --> 00:10:17,266
But in return for you
working security

266
00:10:17,301 --> 00:10:19,183
I'll let you ride
two rides a day.

267
00:10:19,218 --> 00:10:21,820
But only two rides and
only if i'm not on them.

268
00:10:21,855 --> 00:10:26,158
Uh, i'm afraid i don't
really like rides.

269
00:10:27,459 --> 00:10:29,411
But, you can ride
anything you want.

270
00:10:29,446 --> 00:10:31,363
And you don't have to
wait in line.

271
00:10:31,398 --> 00:10:33,497
I'm not interested.

272
00:10:33,532 --> 00:10:35,267
Dude, are you from
mars or something?

273
00:10:35,302 --> 00:10:37,002
Any ride you want,
no lines.

274
00:10:37,436 --> 00:10:40,472
If you need security,
i need a cash salary.

275
00:10:40,507 --> 00:10:41,738
But i don't
have any cash,

276
00:10:41,773 --> 00:10:43,074
I spent everything
on this park.

277
00:10:43,109 --> 00:10:44,610
Well, look,
why don't you just let

278
00:10:44,645 --> 00:10:46,111
A couple of people
in each day.

279
00:10:46,545 --> 00:10:48,714
Every day you can just
let two people in,

280
00:10:48,749 --> 00:10:51,281
Charge 29.95 for tickets,

281
00:10:51,316 --> 00:10:53,919
And then you can use that
to pay my daily salary.

282
00:10:53,954 --> 00:10:56,088
Uh, two people!

283
00:10:56,522 --> 00:10:58,690
This place is huge,
you'll never notice two people.

284
00:10:58,725 --> 00:11:00,425
And then you'll have
security for your park.

285
00:11:00,460 --> 00:11:02,161
Well, all right,
god damn it.

286
00:11:02,594 --> 00:11:03,896
I'll open the park to
two people each day.

287
00:11:04,329 --> 00:11:06,064
But remember, anybody else you
see trespassing in the park-

288
00:11:06,099 --> 00:11:07,366
I will shoot on sight.

289
00:11:07,401 --> 00:11:09,101
Sweet.

290
00:11:10,836 --> 00:11:12,102
You're a very
lucky little boy.

291
00:11:12,137 --> 00:11:14,740
I've never seen a
hemorrhoid so infected.

292
00:11:14,775 --> 00:11:16,041
It could've killed you.

293
00:11:16,475 --> 00:11:17,741
Lucky.

294
00:11:17,776 --> 00:11:19,511
Oh, look, kyle, your little
friend stan is here to see you.

295
00:11:19,945 --> 00:11:20,777
Dude, you okay?

296
00:11:20,812 --> 00:11:22,513
Oh, i'm swell, stan.

297
00:11:22,548 --> 00:11:23,849
I popped my hemorrhoid
trying to climb the fence

298
00:11:23,884 --> 00:11:25,384
Into cartmanland
and it got infected.

299
00:11:25,419 --> 00:11:26,885
I really need to go
to the bathroom,

300
00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:28,187
But if i do,
it will pop again

301
00:11:28,620 --> 00:11:29,488
And the pain will
make me pass out.

302
00:11:29,922 --> 00:11:30,754
How are you?

303
00:11:30,789 --> 00:11:32,307
Well, um, i found out
that cartman's letting

304
00:11:32,342 --> 00:11:33,790
A few people each day
into his theme park.

305
00:11:33,825 --> 00:11:36,428
I was thinking we could put
on disguises and get in.

306
00:11:36,463 --> 00:11:39,048
I'm afraid kyle can't ride
any amusement park rides

307
00:11:39,083 --> 00:11:41,633
For over a year because of
his horrible hemorrhoid.

308
00:11:41,668 --> 00:11:42,900
Jesus.

309
00:11:42,935 --> 00:11:45,068
But it's okay, stan, because
i finally figured it out.

310
00:11:45,103 --> 00:11:48,574
You see, if someone like cartman could get
a million dollars and his own theme park,

311
00:11:48,609 --> 00:11:52,044
Then there is no god,
there's no god, dude.

312
00:11:52,079 --> 00:11:53,345
Kyle, don't
say such things!

313
00:11:53,380 --> 00:11:55,045
Why, why mom?

314
00:11:55,080 --> 00:11:56,381
Because if i do, something
bad will happen to me?

315
00:11:56,815 --> 00:11:58,767
Because if i do,
your god might not shower me

316
00:11:58,802 --> 00:12:00,628
With his blessings of
infected hemorrhoids.

317
00:12:00,663 --> 00:12:02,454
Kyle, you just don't
understand, it's-

318
00:12:02,489 --> 00:12:04,154
No, i finally do
understand!

319
00:12:04,189 --> 00:12:05,924
There is no justice!
There is no god!

320
00:12:06,358 --> 00:12:09,828
Do you hear me?!
I renounce my faith!

321
00:12:11,129 --> 00:12:12,396
All right, all right,
listen up, people.

322
00:12:12,431 --> 00:12:15,467
Cartmanland is open, but only
to two people each day.

323
00:12:15,901 --> 00:12:16,768
Ohh!
That's gay.

324
00:12:17,202 --> 00:12:18,937
I've just gotta cover
my security expenses.

325
00:12:18,972 --> 00:12:19,805
Butters, clyde
you can come in.

326
00:12:20,239 --> 00:12:21,540
Oh!
Oh!

327
00:12:21,974 --> 00:12:25,444
Rest of you will just
have to try another day.

328
00:12:26,311 --> 00:12:28,480
Hey, one park admission,
that'll be $29.95 sir.

329
00:12:28,515 --> 00:12:30,180
Five cents
is your change.

330
00:12:30,215 --> 00:12:31,516
Enjoy your stay
at cartmanland.

331
00:12:31,551 --> 00:12:33,217
Oh boy, oh boy!

332
00:12:33,252 --> 00:12:35,420
And enjoy your stay
at cartmanland.

333
00:12:35,455 --> 00:12:36,687
Oh, finally work is over.

334
00:12:36,722 --> 00:12:39,324
Now i can get back to
riding my rides.

335
00:12:39,758 --> 00:12:41,927
? Da-Da-Da
i've got my own theme park?

336
00:12:42,361 --> 00:12:43,627
Hmm, what should
i go on now?

337
00:12:43,662 --> 00:12:46,698
I know, i'll go on the
haunted mansion ride again!

338
00:12:46,733 --> 00:12:48,867
? Da-Da da da
da-Da da-Da-Da?

339
00:12:48,902 --> 00:12:49,700
? Da da-?

340
00:12:49,735 --> 00:12:51,001
What are you doing?

341
00:12:51,036 --> 00:12:52,337
We're in line for
the spook house.

342
00:12:52,771 --> 00:12:54,506
Line? Line!?

343
00:12:54,541 --> 00:12:56,206
I hate lines!

344
00:12:56,241 --> 00:12:57,542
Can't you go on something
else right now?

345
00:12:57,577 --> 00:12:58,844
We want to see
the spook house.

346
00:12:58,879 --> 00:13:00,978
Well, we paid $29.95.

347
00:13:01,013 --> 00:13:01,880
We should be able to
go in the spook house.

348
00:13:02,314 --> 00:13:03,146
Yeah.

349
00:13:03,181 --> 00:13:04,483
But i think
it's broke down.

350
00:13:04,518 --> 00:13:05,749
The cars aren't moving.

351
00:13:05,784 --> 00:13:06,652
All right, all right,
hang on.

352
00:13:06,687 --> 00:13:07,484
Security!

353
00:13:07,519 --> 00:13:09,219
What?

354
00:13:09,254 --> 00:13:10,555
Look, the haunted house
ride broke down.

355
00:13:10,590 --> 00:13:11,822
I need you to fix it.

356
00:13:11,857 --> 00:13:13,592
Ah, i'm security,
not maintenance.

357
00:13:14,026 --> 00:13:15,292
But i don't know
how it works.

358
00:13:15,327 --> 00:13:17,062
Well, your rides are gonna
break down every now and then.

359
00:13:17,097 --> 00:13:18,797
You need to hire
a maintenance person.

360
00:13:19,231 --> 00:13:20,098
Uh, all right, all right.

361
00:13:20,532 --> 00:13:22,050
I'll let two more people
in each day.

362
00:13:22,085 --> 00:13:23,568
So i can hire
a maintenance person.

363
00:13:27,806 --> 00:13:29,541
All right folks, we've had
another change in policy.

364
00:13:29,975 --> 00:13:31,276
I've had to hire
a maintenance person

365
00:13:31,311 --> 00:13:32,542
And to pay his salary,

366
00:13:32,577 --> 00:13:34,963
I have to let in
two more people a day.

367
00:13:34,998 --> 00:13:37,314
However, the stupid
maintenance person

368
00:13:37,349 --> 00:13:39,301
Demanded i have food
and drinks in the park.

369
00:13:39,336 --> 00:13:41,253
So now i've had to hire
a beverage person

370
00:13:41,288 --> 00:13:42,519
And a cotton candy person.

371
00:13:42,554 --> 00:13:45,157
Which means i now have to let
eight people come in a day.

372
00:13:45,192 --> 00:13:46,857
But, you are to
try your best

373
00:13:46,892 --> 00:13:48,627
Not to ride any rides
that i am on.

374
00:13:48,662 --> 00:13:49,893
Understood?

375
00:13:49,928 --> 00:13:52,531
All right, let's go.

376
00:13:52,566 --> 00:13:53,832
Timmy!

377
00:13:55,133 --> 00:13:56,001
Wait a minute,
who are you?

378
00:13:56,036 --> 00:13:57,267
Mike gainer.

379
00:13:57,302 --> 00:13:58,603
Ha, get the hell
out of here, stan!

380
00:13:59,037 --> 00:14:00,304
Goddammit cartman,
let me in!

381
00:14:00,339 --> 00:14:02,074
I thought you said buying
a theme park was stupid.

382
00:14:02,507 --> 00:14:03,375
Security!

383
00:14:03,809 --> 00:14:04,641
It is stupid, cartman.

384
00:14:04,676 --> 00:14:06,411
You made kyle lose his faith
in god, you fat asshole!

385
00:14:06,446 --> 00:14:07,730
Get him out of here.

386
00:14:07,765 --> 00:14:09,014
Move along, sir.

387
00:14:09,049 --> 00:14:10,714
Ah!

388
00:14:10,749 --> 00:14:12,050
This isn't over,
cartman!

389
00:14:12,085 --> 00:14:13,317
Uh!

390
00:14:13,352 --> 00:14:17,689
Well, now i can finally get back
to riding my rides.

391
00:14:22,027 --> 00:14:23,293
Uh-Oh.

392
00:14:23,328 --> 00:14:24,629
Oh man, i'm so scared.

393
00:14:24,664 --> 00:14:26,798
Aah!

394
00:14:28,100 --> 00:14:29,184
Ah!

395
00:14:29,219 --> 00:14:30,233
Aaah!

396
00:14:30,268 --> 00:14:31,570
Just a little more.

397
00:14:31,605 --> 00:14:32,836
There we go.

398
00:14:32,871 --> 00:14:34,606
Hello, kyle,
how's the hemorrhoid today?

399
00:14:34,641 --> 00:14:35,872
Awesome.

400
00:14:35,907 --> 00:14:37,642
Kyle, we want to tell you
about the book of job.

401
00:14:38,076 --> 00:14:39,343
It's a story
from the bible.

402
00:14:39,378 --> 00:14:41,113
I've had enough of the bible,
what has it gotten me?

403
00:14:41,148 --> 00:14:42,848
Oh, i think you'll see
differently after hearing this.

404
00:14:43,281 --> 00:14:44,149
Sit down, kyle.

405
00:14:44,583 --> 00:14:45,849
Ah, okay.

406
00:14:45,884 --> 00:14:48,920
You see, job lived in
the east of jordan

407
00:14:48,955 --> 00:14:51,540
A long, long time ago.

408
00:14:51,575 --> 00:14:54,126
Job was a great man.

409
00:14:54,559 --> 00:14:56,294
He was blessed with
ten lovely children,

410
00:14:56,329 --> 00:14:58,862
A wonderful wife
and many friends.

411
00:14:58,897 --> 00:15:01,066
He was a godly and a good man
and fed the poor.

412
00:15:01,500 --> 00:15:03,235
He was the most upright
and honorable of men.

413
00:15:03,668 --> 00:15:05,404
And every day
he praised god.

414
00:15:05,439 --> 00:15:06,271
But one day,

415
00:15:06,705 --> 00:15:08,440
Satan went up to heaven
and talked to god.

416
00:15:08,475 --> 00:15:09,706
Satan talked to god?

417
00:15:09,741 --> 00:15:12,343
Yes, in the book of job
satan talks to god.

418
00:15:12,378 --> 00:15:14,911
And god says to satan,
"have you seen job?

419
00:15:14,946 --> 00:15:17,549
He is a great man and
he praises me every day."

420
00:15:17,584 --> 00:15:18,850
But satan said,
"oh yeah?

421
00:15:19,284 --> 00:15:21,453
"He only praises you
because you gave him so much.

422
00:15:21,488 --> 00:15:22,754
"If you didn't
give him those things

423
00:15:22,789 --> 00:15:24,055
He would curse
your name."

424
00:15:24,090 --> 00:15:25,322
To which god said,

425
00:15:25,357 --> 00:15:27,491
"Oh yeah?
I'll show you satan.

426
00:15:27,526 --> 00:15:28,827
"I'll take those things
away from job

427
00:15:29,261 --> 00:15:30,562
And he will still
praise my name."

428
00:15:30,996 --> 00:15:33,598
And so, god had a bunch
of barbarians come in

429
00:15:33,633 --> 00:15:35,767
And slaughter job's
ox and donkeys

430
00:15:35,802 --> 00:15:37,467
And murder
all his workers.

431
00:15:37,502 --> 00:15:39,636
Then god sent his fireballs
from the sky

432
00:15:39,671 --> 00:15:41,840
And killed his sheep and
the rest of his employees.

433
00:15:41,875 --> 00:15:44,009
And then as job's sons
and daughters were eating

434
00:15:44,443 --> 00:15:46,178
God sent a mighty wind
to collapse the house

435
00:15:46,213 --> 00:15:47,479
And crushed and
killed them all.

436
00:15:47,913 --> 00:15:49,179
Job was terribly sad

437
00:15:49,214 --> 00:15:50,480
But he felt to
his knees and said,

438
00:15:50,515 --> 00:15:52,684
"The lord giveth and
the lord taketh away."

439
00:15:52,719 --> 00:15:54,419
And praised god's name.

440
00:15:54,853 --> 00:15:57,672
So then, job got painful sores
all over his body.

441
00:15:57,707 --> 00:16:00,492
He was in terrible, miserable
pain all day, everyday.

442
00:16:00,926 --> 00:16:02,227
But he still
kept his faith.

443
00:16:02,661 --> 00:16:03,927
God said to satan,

444
00:16:03,962 --> 00:16:07,866
"See? I told you!
Job still praises me."

445
00:16:12,204 --> 00:16:13,939
And that's it?
That's the end?

446
00:16:13,974 --> 00:16:15,205
Basically.

447
00:16:15,240 --> 00:16:17,374
That's the most horrible story
i've ever heard.

448
00:16:17,409 --> 00:16:19,144
Why would god do such horrible
things to a good person

449
00:16:19,578 --> 00:16:21,313
Just to prove
a point to satan?

450
00:16:21,348 --> 00:16:23,716
Oh, uh, i don't know.

451
00:16:23,751 --> 00:16:26,049
Then i was right.

452
00:16:26,084 --> 00:16:27,385
Job has all
his children killed

453
00:16:27,819 --> 00:16:30,422
And michael bay gets to
keep making movies.

454
00:16:30,856 --> 00:16:32,556
There isn't a god.

455
00:16:32,591 --> 00:16:35,193
And since the stupid security
guard needs video surveillance

456
00:16:35,228 --> 00:16:36,928
I have to let in
two more people a day

457
00:16:36,963 --> 00:16:38,230
To cover those expenses.

458
00:16:38,663 --> 00:16:40,181
Need to cover the new
ticket guy's salary

459
00:16:40,216 --> 00:16:41,700
So that's three more
admissions a day.

460
00:16:42,133 --> 00:16:43,001
Clean-Up crew
for the bathroom

461
00:16:43,435 --> 00:16:44,736
Money to cover
paint and upkeep.

462
00:16:44,771 --> 00:16:46,055
So, that's about
four admissions,

463
00:16:46,090 --> 00:16:47,339
Bringing the grand total to...

464
00:16:47,374 --> 00:16:48,640
God damn it.

465
00:16:49,074 --> 00:16:52,110
816 people can come
into the park today.

466
00:16:52,544 --> 00:16:55,146
Wo-Hoo!
Yeah! Alright!

467
00:16:55,580 --> 00:16:58,148
Welcome to
cartmanland.

468
00:16:58,183 --> 00:17:00,352
Isn't he getting
any better, doctor?

469
00:17:00,387 --> 00:17:02,087
I don't understand it.

470
00:17:02,521 --> 00:17:05,123
He's not fighting the
infected hemorrhoid at all.

471
00:17:05,158 --> 00:17:06,389
It's like he...

472
00:17:06,424 --> 00:17:08,159
Like he's
lost all hope.

473
00:17:08,194 --> 00:17:09,860
Well, if you'll excuse me

474
00:17:09,895 --> 00:17:11,595
I've got some more
tests to run.

475
00:17:11,630 --> 00:17:14,232
And now back to
"money quest" onhbc.

476
00:17:14,267 --> 00:17:15,534
Welcome back to
money quest.

477
00:17:15,967 --> 00:17:16,835
In just over two weeks

478
00:17:17,269 --> 00:17:18,570
Young financial genius
eric cartman

479
00:17:19,004 --> 00:17:20,270
Has managed to
turn a theme park

480
00:17:20,305 --> 00:17:22,040
That was seeing less than
100 attendees a day

481
00:17:22,474 --> 00:17:25,076
Into a thriving park with
attendance in the thousands.

482
00:17:25,111 --> 00:17:26,343
And the way he did it

483
00:17:26,378 --> 00:17:27,679
Was with the brilliant
"you can't come" technique.

484
00:17:28,113 --> 00:17:28,945
For the first
several days

485
00:17:28,980 --> 00:17:30,680
The young businessman
saturated the market

486
00:17:30,715 --> 00:17:32,450
With claims that nobody
could get into his park.

487
00:17:32,485 --> 00:17:34,150
It made the public crazy.

488
00:17:34,185 --> 00:17:35,921
So then, weeks later,
when he opened the doors

489
00:17:35,956 --> 00:17:37,656
They were lining up
around the block.

490
00:17:37,691 --> 00:17:38,523
Simply amazing.

491
00:17:38,957 --> 00:17:40,223
Well, i think
we should point out

492
00:17:40,258 --> 00:17:41,993
That this technique is
already being applied

493
00:17:42,028 --> 00:17:43,260
By businesses
all over the country.

494
00:17:43,295 --> 00:17:46,331
I'm sorry, we're no longer
taking reservations.

495
00:17:46,366 --> 00:17:47,597
Nobody can eat here.

496
00:17:47,632 --> 00:17:48,899
You'll have to
leave now.

497
00:17:48,934 --> 00:17:51,536
No, i'm sorry,
you can't see this movie.

498
00:17:51,571 --> 00:17:52,837
Nobody can see
this movie.

499
00:17:52,872 --> 00:17:54,573
Ican't even go in.

500
00:17:54,608 --> 00:17:55,839
Out!

501
00:17:55,874 --> 00:17:57,175
Nobody is allowed into
"crazy's" anymore!

502
00:17:57,210 --> 00:17:58,910
Get out of here!

503
00:17:58,945 --> 00:18:00,610
Amazing.

504
00:18:00,645 --> 00:18:03,248
Eric cartman is surely the
financial genius of our time.

505
00:18:03,682 --> 00:18:06,249
Uh, uhaah...

506
00:18:06,284 --> 00:18:08,852
Kyle? Kyle?

507
00:18:08,887 --> 00:18:10,622
Get the doctor!

508
00:18:19,297 --> 00:18:21,900
Goddammit,
stop running into me!

509
00:18:25,804 --> 00:18:27,105
Woo-Hoo,
woo- Hooo!

510
00:18:27,539 --> 00:18:28,840
Woo-H- Ack!

511
00:18:44,456 --> 00:18:46,191
Ahhhhh!

512
00:18:47,492 --> 00:18:49,192
My god,
look at it, chris.

513
00:18:49,227 --> 00:18:50,962
That kid completely
turned this place around.

514
00:18:50,997 --> 00:18:52,228
He sure did.

515
00:18:52,263 --> 00:18:53,999
Oh, if i could only have a
park that worked like this.

516
00:18:54,034 --> 00:18:55,300
Hey, there you are.

517
00:18:55,335 --> 00:18:56,566
Oh, hello.

518
00:18:56,601 --> 00:18:57,902
Congratulations
on your success.

519
00:18:57,937 --> 00:18:58,770
Just give me
my money back.

520
00:18:59,204 --> 00:19:00,470
What?

521
00:19:00,505 --> 00:19:01,373
I changed my mind, i don't
want your stupid park.

522
00:19:01,806 --> 00:19:02,890
But it's doing great.

523
00:19:02,925 --> 00:19:03,975
You call this
great?

524
00:19:04,409 --> 00:19:05,241
I call it hell.

525
00:19:05,276 --> 00:19:06,578
Trade me back,
goddammit.

526
00:19:06,613 --> 00:19:07,445
You bet!

527
00:19:07,879 --> 00:19:09,579
I'll go get your money
right now.

528
00:19:09,614 --> 00:19:10,880
Daddy, daddy,
can we ride the rockets?

529
00:19:10,915 --> 00:19:12,651
Goddammit, get the
out of my way!

530
00:19:19,257 --> 00:19:20,957
Isn't he responding
at all doctor?

531
00:19:20,992 --> 00:19:25,330
I'm sorry, your son appears
to be losing the battle.

532
00:19:25,365 --> 00:19:29,668
I'm afraid that the hemorrhoid
has spread to his lungs.

533
00:19:29,703 --> 00:19:31,403
Normally the body
would fight the infection,

534
00:19:31,438 --> 00:19:35,740
But he's, he's just
given up on life.

535
00:19:35,775 --> 00:19:37,440
But then,
are you saying?

536
00:19:37,475 --> 00:19:39,644
There's nothing more
i can do.

537
00:19:40,078 --> 00:19:42,681
Little fella's just
lost his will to live.

538
00:19:43,114 --> 00:19:46,151
Oh kyle! Kyle,
you've got to fight!

539
00:19:47,452 --> 00:19:50,488
Good riddance you stupid park,
you can all kiss my ass!

540
00:19:50,922 --> 00:19:51,790
Excuse me,
eric cartman?

541
00:19:52,223 --> 00:19:53,091
Yeah.

542
00:19:53,525 --> 00:19:54,791
I'm frank gerret
with the irs.

543
00:19:54,826 --> 00:19:56,127
You haven't kept records
of your income or payout

544
00:19:56,162 --> 00:19:58,296
And there's a $500,000
discrepancy.

545
00:19:58,730 --> 00:20:00,465
Seize the assets.

546
00:20:00,500 --> 00:20:01,297
Hey!

547
00:20:01,332 --> 00:20:02,634
Hey, that's my money!

548
00:20:03,068 --> 00:20:04,369
There's also the lawsuit of the
little boy who died in your park.

549
00:20:04,803 --> 00:20:06,104
The family is entitled
to the rest of this.

550
00:20:06,139 --> 00:20:07,804
What, kenny?
He dies all the time!

551
00:20:07,839 --> 00:20:10,442
You still owe $13,000
more than this, mr. Cartman.

552
00:20:10,477 --> 00:20:11,708
We'll see you in court.

553
00:20:11,743 --> 00:20:13,478
You can't take my money,
goddammit!

554
00:20:13,513 --> 00:20:15,213
We know how well
your park is doing.

555
00:20:15,248 --> 00:20:16,948
You'll make it back
in no time.

556
00:20:16,983 --> 00:20:19,516
Ah! But i- Ah!

557
00:20:19,551 --> 00:20:21,069
Hey, hey, mr. Foon,
i changed my mind.

558
00:20:21,104 --> 00:20:22,587
I need the park to
make my money back.

559
00:20:22,622 --> 00:20:23,853
No way, jose.

560
00:20:23,888 --> 00:20:25,155
But i'm getting sued now.

561
00:20:25,190 --> 00:20:26,491
If i don't have the park
i lose everything.

562
00:20:26,526 --> 00:20:27,792
"I don't care,"
said pierre.

563
00:20:28,226 --> 00:20:29,492
I'm from france.

564
00:20:29,527 --> 00:20:30,829
This can't be happening!

565
00:20:30,864 --> 00:20:32,564
Aaah!

566
00:20:33,431 --> 00:20:34,698
Kyle, you gotta
come see!

567
00:20:34,733 --> 00:20:37,335
Kyle is not going to
make it, stanley.

568
00:20:37,370 --> 00:20:38,203
Oh, gerald!

569
00:20:38,636 --> 00:20:39,938
Doctor, can we wheel kyle
out of here on his bed

570
00:20:39,973 --> 00:20:41,204
With the machines attached?

571
00:20:41,239 --> 00:20:42,974
Well, i supposed it
could be rigged, but i...

572
00:20:43,408 --> 00:20:46,010
Then damn it, man,
do it!

573
00:20:47,312 --> 00:20:48,578
It isn't fair!

574
00:20:48,613 --> 00:20:50,782
You goddamn assholes,
it isn't fair!

575
00:20:50,817 --> 00:20:52,048
Look kyle, look.

576
00:20:52,083 --> 00:20:55,553
You just build me up to
knock me down, didn't you?!

577
00:20:55,588 --> 00:20:56,855
What about my dreams?

578
00:20:57,288 --> 00:20:58,590
What about my money?

579
00:20:58,625 --> 00:20:59,856
Huh?

580
00:20:59,891 --> 00:21:01,192
I'm so pissed off!

581
00:21:01,227 --> 00:21:02,494
Move along, sir.

582
00:21:02,927 --> 00:21:04,662
You are vandalizing
private property.

583
00:21:04,697 --> 00:21:07,282
Hey, you used to
work for me!

584
00:21:07,317 --> 00:21:09,868
Goddammit,
you son of a bitch!

585
00:21:09,903 --> 00:21:12,470
Kyle.

586
00:21:12,904 --> 00:21:13,737
He's coming back.

587
00:21:13,772 --> 00:21:15,507
That's it baby,
that's it.

588
00:21:15,542 --> 00:21:17,242
Oh goddamnit,
this sucks!

589
00:21:17,277 --> 00:21:18,508
Wait a minute, yes,

590
00:21:18,543 --> 00:21:20,278
The hemorrhoid is
going into remission.

591
00:21:20,313 --> 00:21:22,412
Arrrrrr rrr!

592
00:21:22,447 --> 00:21:24,182
Look kyle, cartman
is totally miserable,

593
00:21:24,217 --> 00:21:25,717
Even more miserable
than he was before

594
00:21:25,752 --> 00:21:27,218
Because he's had his dream
and lost it.

595
00:21:27,652 --> 00:21:28,918
It's not fair!

596
00:21:28,953 --> 00:21:30,688
It's not fair,
i wanna die!

597
00:21:30,723 --> 00:21:33,959
I wanna die!

598
00:21:33,994 --> 00:21:37,195
Youareup there.

599
00:21:39,798 --> 00:21:41,099
Captioning made possible by
comedy central

600
00:21:42,400 --> 00:21:43,701
Captioned by
soundwriters™