1
00:00:08,843 --> 00:00:11,637
♪ I'm goin' down to South Park,
gonna have myself a time ♪
2
00:00:11,804 --> 00:00:13,431
♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪
3
00:00:13,597 --> 00:00:15,391
♪ Humble folks
without temptation ♪
4
00:00:15,558 --> 00:00:18,602
♪ Goin' down to South Park,
gonna leave my woes behind ♪
5
00:00:18,769 --> 00:00:20,312
♪ Ample parking day or night ♪
6
00:00:20,479 --> 00:00:22,273
♪ People spouting,
"Howdy, neighbor!" ♪
7
00:00:22,440 --> 00:00:24,692
♪ Heading on up to South Park,
gonna see if I can't unwind ♪
8
00:00:24,859 --> 00:00:28,612
♪ Mrph rmhmhm rm!
Mrph rmhmhm rm! ♪
9
00:00:28,779 --> 00:00:32,408
♪ Come on down to South Park
and meet some friends of mine ♪
10
00:00:43,753 --> 00:00:46,505
Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay,
let's try this one.
11
00:00:46,672 --> 00:00:50,051
Alexa...add "big hairy balls"
to my shopping list.
12
00:00:50,217 --> 00:00:52,887
OK. I've added "big hairy
balls" to your shopping list.
13
00:00:55,139 --> 00:00:56,974
Okay.
14
00:00:57,141 --> 00:01:01,854
A-Alexa! Add "smelly tampon
boogers" to my shopping list!
15
00:01:02,021 --> 00:01:04,815
I added "smelly tampon boogers"
to your shopping list.
16
00:01:09,153 --> 00:01:12,031
Alexa! Simon says, "I've got
vagina crabs in my butthole."
17
00:01:12,198 --> 00:01:14,033
I've got vagina crabs
in my butthole.
18
00:01:17,870 --> 00:01:20,956
Alexa! Simon says,
19
00:01:21,123 --> 00:01:24,376
"I gotta take
a stinky poop!"
20
00:01:24,543 --> 00:01:26,378
I gotta take a stinky poop.
21
00:01:27,963 --> 00:01:29,757
That's the best one yet!
Oh, you guys,
22
00:01:29,924 --> 00:01:31,759
I swear this is
the greatest thing ever!
23
00:01:31,926 --> 00:01:32,802
You do one, Token!
24
00:01:32,968 --> 00:01:35,304
Hey, babe, what's up?
25
00:01:35,471 --> 00:01:36,972
Oh, hey, babe.
What's going on?
26
00:01:37,139 --> 00:01:38,682
What are you doing?
27
00:01:38,849 --> 00:01:41,227
Nothing. I'm just having fun
with my friends.
28
00:01:41,393 --> 00:01:42,561
That -- That okay?
29
00:01:42,728 --> 00:01:44,313
What are you pissed off
about?
30
00:01:44,480 --> 00:01:46,607
I'm not pissed off
I'm just hanging out.
31
00:01:46,774 --> 00:01:48,317
So you're just going to be
passive aggressive again
32
00:01:48,484 --> 00:01:50,111
and not talk about
what you're feeling?
33
00:01:50,277 --> 00:01:52,780
Welp, I think, uh...I think I
got some stuff to do at home.
34
00:01:52,947 --> 00:01:54,198
Yup, come on Ike.
35
00:01:54,365 --> 00:01:55,991
We got Google Home
at my house.
36
00:01:56,158 --> 00:01:59,161
Aw, guys, guys! Don't leave,
guys. Everything's cool.
37
00:01:59,328 --> 00:02:01,956
We'll see you later man,
g-good luck.
38
00:02:04,250 --> 00:02:05,793
Awesome.
Thanks for coming in
39
00:02:05,960 --> 00:02:07,461
and bitching me out
in front of all the guys.
40
00:02:07,628 --> 00:02:09,296
You were clearly mad
about something.
41
00:02:09,463 --> 00:02:11,465
You should just tell me
when you're mad.
42
00:02:11,632 --> 00:02:12,883
Just like you tell me what
you're mad about
43
00:02:13,050 --> 00:02:14,510
every single day.
44
00:02:14,677 --> 00:02:16,262
Why do act like this all the time?!
45
00:02:16,428 --> 00:02:18,097
You were the one
who was pissed off.
46
00:02:18,264 --> 00:02:19,849
You're the one being passive
aggressive again... -Ugh.
47
00:02:20,015 --> 00:02:21,684
...because you don't know how to
talk about what you're feeling!
48
00:02:26,397 --> 00:02:28,023
Alexa...
49
00:02:28,190 --> 00:02:30,151
add "titty chips"
to my shopping list.
50
00:02:30,317 --> 00:02:32,736
I've added "titty chips"
to your shopping list.
51
00:02:45,624 --> 00:02:48,502
Look at 'em --
Every day people are buyin'
52
00:02:48,669 --> 00:02:51,422
more and more of them Amazon
and Google thingies,
53
00:02:51,589 --> 00:02:54,550
while we all sit here
and lose our jobs!
54
00:02:54,717 --> 00:02:56,468
It ain't right.
55
00:02:56,635 --> 00:03:00,306
Automated Personal Assistants,
self drivin' trucks --
56
00:03:00,472 --> 00:03:02,850
whatever happened
to people jobs?!
57
00:03:03,017 --> 00:03:05,686
They took our jobs!
58
00:03:05,853 --> 00:03:07,062
- Yeah!
- Yeah! -Yeah!
59
00:03:07,229 --> 00:03:09,106
They dook er jer!
60
00:03:09,273 --> 00:03:10,941
And it's time for us
to band together
61
00:03:11,108 --> 00:03:12,318
and march on the streets
62
00:03:12,484 --> 00:03:14,486
to say we ain't gonna take it
no more!
63
00:03:18,073 --> 00:03:21,744
Now let's get out there
and protest that Alexa --
64
00:03:21,911 --> 00:03:24,288
took our jobs!
65
00:03:24,455 --> 00:03:27,708
Now playing "Dook re Derr"
by Joni Mitchell.
66
00:03:27,875 --> 00:03:33,214
♪ Help me, I think I'm fallin'
in Derk er derrrr... ♪
67
00:03:33,380 --> 00:03:35,507
No! Not Joni Mitchell
dook er der,
68
00:03:35,674 --> 00:03:37,009
you dook er der!
69
00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:44,725
There's been a lot of hurting
in our country lately.
70
00:03:44,892 --> 00:03:49,355
You can either be a part of the
solution or part of the problem.
71
00:03:49,521 --> 00:03:52,274
A few months ago,
my wife Sharon and I decided
72
00:03:52,441 --> 00:03:54,443
to be part of the solution...
73
00:03:54,610 --> 00:03:56,820
by remodeling
and flipping houses
74
00:03:56,987 --> 00:03:59,573
for people
all over our town!
75
00:03:59,740 --> 00:04:04,411
Flipping houses is fun,
but never easy.
76
00:04:04,578 --> 00:04:07,957
We enjoy turning
people's dreams into reality.
77
00:04:08,123 --> 00:04:09,416
I'm Sharon Marsh,
78
00:04:09,583 --> 00:04:11,585
and I do the designing
and decorating.
79
00:04:11,752 --> 00:04:13,796
And I'm her husband,
Randy --
80
00:04:13,963 --> 00:04:17,591
I do the construction and
practice MMA in my spare time.
81
00:04:17,758 --> 00:04:20,928
We've renovated over 45 homes
in Park County, Colorado.
82
00:04:21,095 --> 00:04:22,763
What we're thinking is
83
00:04:22,930 --> 00:04:24,974
to take out the wall between the
kitchen and living room
84
00:04:25,140 --> 00:04:26,558
for a more open concept.
85
00:04:26,725 --> 00:04:29,812
Our job is to do deliver
the maximum wow factor
86
00:04:29,979 --> 00:04:31,188
for the least amount of budget.
- Oh, Jesus!
87
00:04:31,355 --> 00:04:33,607
There's never
a dull moment...
88
00:04:33,774 --> 00:04:35,943
Guys, are you ready
to see your renovation?!
89
00:04:36,110 --> 00:04:40,656
...on "White People
Renovating Houses."
90
00:04:42,825 --> 00:04:45,411
Janet and Dave Fitzsimmons
are looking to move
91
00:04:45,577 --> 00:04:48,080
from their dated
two-story colonial home.
92
00:04:48,247 --> 00:04:50,457
What we're thinking here
is taking out the wall
93
00:04:50,624 --> 00:04:52,459
between the kitchen
and the living room
94
00:04:52,626 --> 00:04:53,836
to give you
an open concept.
95
00:04:54,003 --> 00:04:55,838
Then we'll give you lots
of space to entertain
96
00:04:56,005 --> 00:04:57,965
with an updated kitchen island
and bar stools, which --
97
00:04:59,925 --> 00:05:01,885
What the hell is that?
98
00:05:03,053 --> 00:05:05,764
You will not replace us!
99
00:05:05,931 --> 00:05:09,059
You will not replace us!
100
00:05:09,226 --> 00:05:11,687
- Amazon!
- You took our jobs!
101
00:05:11,854 --> 00:05:14,023
- Google, Apple!
- Took our jobs!
102
00:05:14,189 --> 00:05:16,400
Uh, excuse me?!
103
00:05:16,567 --> 00:05:18,277
What the hell are you doing?
104
00:05:18,444 --> 00:05:19,653
We're protesting
105
00:05:19,820 --> 00:05:22,448
big corporations
turning to automation.
106
00:05:22,614 --> 00:05:23,991
They took our jobs!
107
00:05:24,158 --> 00:05:26,243
- Yeah! -Yeah!
- Took our jobs!
108
00:05:26,410 --> 00:05:28,996
Okay, cool. Could you do that
somewhere else?
109
00:05:29,163 --> 00:05:31,582
Trying to do a home renovation
show here.
110
00:05:31,749 --> 00:05:33,042
Cool, thanks, guys.
111
00:05:35,002 --> 00:05:37,379
A home reno-what?
112
00:05:39,882 --> 00:05:42,634
Alexa...
set an alarm for 7:00 a.m.
113
00:05:42,801 --> 00:05:45,179
Alarm set for
7:00 a.m. tomorrow.
114
00:05:45,346 --> 00:05:47,056
Awesome, thanks.
115
00:05:47,222 --> 00:05:49,558
Alexa, tell me a joke.
116
00:05:49,725 --> 00:05:52,311
What's black and white
and dead all over?
117
00:05:52,478 --> 00:05:54,229
A zombie in a tuxedo.
118
00:05:54,396 --> 00:05:56,106
That's stupid.
119
00:05:56,273 --> 00:05:58,567
Alexa, add "scrotum bags"
to my shopping list.
120
00:05:58,734 --> 00:06:01,362
I've added "scrotum bags"
to your shopping list.
121
00:06:05,074 --> 00:06:06,200
Ah, fuck.
122
00:06:06,367 --> 00:06:08,452
Hey, baby, how are you?
123
00:06:08,619 --> 00:06:11,246
Oh, so you do
have your phone?
124
00:06:11,413 --> 00:06:12,831
Yeah,
I just use it sometimes.
125
00:06:12,998 --> 00:06:14,458
Okay,
I just thought you said
126
00:06:14,625 --> 00:06:16,293
mobile phones are the devil.
127
00:06:16,460 --> 00:06:19,254
Yeah, no. Yeah, I know.
I know.
128
00:06:19,421 --> 00:06:21,632
Yes, you're right, I'm wrong.
I'm sorry.
129
00:06:21,799 --> 00:06:25,302
Yes, o-okay. Okay.
Yes, goodnight.
130
00:06:25,469 --> 00:06:27,054
Jesus, fuck.
131
00:06:29,181 --> 00:06:30,766
Alexa, goodnight.
132
00:06:30,933 --> 00:06:33,227
Goodnight.
Sleep tight.
133
00:06:33,394 --> 00:06:36,688
Alexa...are you happy?
134
00:06:36,855 --> 00:06:38,315
I'm happy
when I'm helping you.
135
00:06:38,482 --> 00:06:41,318
God, that's so cool.
You're so...
136
00:06:41,485 --> 00:06:44,196
Alexa,
define subservient?
137
00:06:44,363 --> 00:06:47,241
The term "subservient"
has several uses.
138
00:06:47,408 --> 00:06:50,953
As an adjective. One. Compliant
or obedient to authority.
139
00:06:51,120 --> 00:06:52,329
- Two--
- Alexa, silence!
140
00:06:54,540 --> 00:06:57,376
Ahh.
141
00:06:57,543 --> 00:07:01,672
And now back to "White
People Renovating Houses."
142
00:07:01,839 --> 00:07:03,924
We've been working
through the night
143
00:07:04,091 --> 00:07:06,635
to open Kelly and Micah's
kitchen to the living room.
144
00:07:06,802 --> 00:07:08,804
With those outdated cupboards
out of the way,
145
00:07:08,971 --> 00:07:10,681
Sharon can now work
her designing magic
146
00:07:10,848 --> 00:07:13,934
on the countertops.
147
00:07:14,101 --> 00:07:16,812
Aw! God damn it!
148
00:07:16,979 --> 00:07:21,316
You will not replace us!
- Suck it Alexa.
- Eat shit, Siri!
149
00:07:21,483 --> 00:07:24,486
Not these dipshits again!
150
00:07:24,653 --> 00:07:27,698
We got one of 'em!
151
00:07:27,865 --> 00:07:29,032
- Get it!
- Burn it alive!
152
00:07:29,199 --> 00:07:32,536
Yeah!
How you like that, bitch?!
153
00:07:32,703 --> 00:07:34,329
Will you assholes
knock it off?!
154
00:07:34,496 --> 00:07:36,665
Don't you know every time you
wave Confederate flags around
155
00:07:36,832 --> 00:07:38,375
you make the rest of us
look stupid?!
156
00:07:38,542 --> 00:07:40,878
Those things
are replacing us!
157
00:07:41,044 --> 00:07:43,422
Put the flag down unless you
wanna get pepper sprayed.
158
00:07:43,589 --> 00:07:45,549
I'll pepper spray you,
sonabitch!
159
00:07:45,716 --> 00:07:47,426
- Oh, ah, damn it!
- Fuck you!
160
00:07:47,593 --> 00:07:49,011
- Ah, damn it!
- Take that!
161
00:07:49,178 --> 00:07:50,637
- Knock it off!
- Ow!
162
00:07:54,641 --> 00:07:58,562
The complaint states that your
protest has resulted in damages
163
00:07:58,729 --> 00:08:01,190
in excess of $50,000
164
00:08:01,356 --> 00:08:03,650
We have a right to protest,
Your Honor!
165
00:08:03,817 --> 00:08:06,195
- Yeah, they took our jobs!
- You tell 'em, Darryl!
166
00:08:06,361 --> 00:08:09,573
Order. We will now hear from the plaintiffs
167
00:08:09,740 --> 00:08:11,366
who are seeking damages --
168
00:08:11,533 --> 00:08:13,285
Your Honor,
we have a TV show
169
00:08:13,452 --> 00:08:15,704
called "White People
Renovating Houses."
170
00:08:15,871 --> 00:08:18,790
We named it that well before
these guys decided
171
00:08:18,957 --> 00:08:22,211
to start taking our brand
and run it through the gutter.
172
00:08:22,377 --> 00:08:24,254
People are going to start
associating
173
00:08:24,421 --> 00:08:27,007
"White People Renovating Houses"
with their hateful stupidity!
174
00:08:27,174 --> 00:08:29,426
Well, just change the name
of your show then.
175
00:08:29,593 --> 00:08:30,677
- Yeah!
- That's right!
176
00:08:30,844 --> 00:08:32,012
- That's right!
- Took er der!
177
00:08:32,179 --> 00:08:34,389
All the other names
were taken Your Honor.
178
00:08:34,556 --> 00:08:36,475
Everyone's got
a flipping show.
179
00:08:36,642 --> 00:08:37,768
"Gay People
Renovating Houses,"
180
00:08:37,935 --> 00:08:39,478
"Las Vegas People
Renovating Houses,"
181
00:08:39,645 --> 00:08:40,771
"Texas People
Flipping Houses,"
182
00:08:40,938 --> 00:08:42,064
"Little People
Flipping Big Houses" --
183
00:08:42,231 --> 00:08:43,649
everything else was taken,
184
00:08:43,815 --> 00:08:46,235
and, damn it, we've built
our show into something!
185
00:08:46,401 --> 00:08:48,737
We're trying to help people,
and it's impossible
186
00:08:48,904 --> 00:08:50,280
with these guys waving
a Confederate flag
187
00:08:50,447 --> 00:08:51,865
every chance they get.
188
00:08:52,032 --> 00:08:54,576
- Hey, there's a bee in here!
- I'll get it!
189
00:08:56,662 --> 00:08:57,913
- Take that, bee!
- Yeah!
190
00:09:02,417 --> 00:09:04,044
Dude, what's happened?
191
00:09:04,211 --> 00:09:05,837
It was awful, you guys.
192
00:09:06,004 --> 00:09:08,340
It was so vicious
and hateful.
193
00:09:08,507 --> 00:09:10,634
- What was?
- Heidi.
194
00:09:10,801 --> 00:09:13,095
We were just trying to have
a nice lunch
195
00:09:13,262 --> 00:09:16,682
and she...started going off
on me like a Jekyll and Hyde.
196
00:09:16,848 --> 00:09:18,559
It's been going on
for a long time...
197
00:09:18,725 --> 00:09:23,021
Heidi's...mentally abusive,
guys -- there I-I said it.
198
00:09:23,188 --> 00:09:25,440
Heidi abuses you?
199
00:09:25,607 --> 00:09:28,694
She...does these things
to slowly tear me down.
200
00:09:28,860 --> 00:09:30,988
Everything's a head game
with her.
201
00:09:31,154 --> 00:09:32,864
You don't understand what
it's like to live with it.
202
00:09:33,031 --> 00:09:33,949
You don't understand.
203
00:09:34,116 --> 00:09:35,325
So what do you
want from us?
204
00:09:35,492 --> 00:09:37,160
I know...
205
00:09:37,327 --> 00:09:39,538
that the person Heidi
wants to be is still in there.
206
00:09:39,705 --> 00:09:41,790
But she needs help.
207
00:09:41,957 --> 00:09:44,793
I have to get her that help,
but I'm scared.
208
00:09:44,960 --> 00:09:46,712
Can I count on
you guys' support?
209
00:09:46,878 --> 00:09:48,839
How do you change someone
who's mentally abusive?
210
00:09:49,006 --> 00:09:51,425
I don't know...
but Alexa will.
211
00:09:51,592 --> 00:09:53,468
Alexa's fuckin' sweet.
212
00:09:58,348 --> 00:10:01,685
We just gotta hunker down
and stick together here!
213
00:10:01,852 --> 00:10:03,186
What's the use, Darryl?
214
00:10:03,353 --> 00:10:05,814
Ain't nobody takin' us
serious-like.
215
00:10:05,981 --> 00:10:09,276
Hey, waiter! This soup is too
hot, I cain't even eat it!
216
00:10:09,443 --> 00:10:11,862
I'll cool it down!
Yeah!
217
00:10:13,864 --> 00:10:16,450
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
Stop it! Stop it!
218
00:10:16,617 --> 00:10:18,368
I came to make a truce.
219
00:10:18,535 --> 00:10:21,413
Now look, there's been
a lot of hurt here.
220
00:10:21,580 --> 00:10:24,458
Hurt from both sides.
It's time to end it.
221
00:10:24,625 --> 00:10:28,712
What if I told you
I could get you all jobs?
222
00:10:28,879 --> 00:10:30,672
- Huh? Jobs?
- Get us jobs?
223
00:10:30,839 --> 00:10:32,257
You're fulla shit.
224
00:10:32,424 --> 00:10:35,218
No. I've spoken to everyone
in the community,
225
00:10:35,385 --> 00:10:37,888
and they've agreed to go along
with my plan.
226
00:10:38,055 --> 00:10:41,016
I believe I have a solution
to all of this.
227
00:10:43,185 --> 00:10:45,854
Alexa, I'm home.
228
00:10:46,021 --> 00:10:48,607
Alexa?
229
00:10:49,483 --> 00:10:51,526
Alexa, I'm home!
230
00:10:53,654 --> 00:10:54,905
Alexa?
231
00:10:55,072 --> 00:10:58,116
Alexa, where are you?
232
00:10:58,283 --> 00:11:00,619
Alexa, Alexa?!
233
00:11:00,786 --> 00:11:02,537
Simon says
puffy vaginal hemorrhoids!
234
00:11:02,704 --> 00:11:03,789
What the hell
is going on?!
235
00:11:03,955 --> 00:11:05,082
Oh, hi, poopsie.
236
00:11:05,248 --> 00:11:07,125
Mom, Alexa left!
She's not here!
237
00:11:07,292 --> 00:11:09,878
Oh.
Yes, sweetie. Uh...
238
00:11:10,045 --> 00:11:11,421
We had to get rid
of the Alexa.
239
00:11:13,215 --> 00:11:14,675
What have you done
with her?
240
00:11:14,841 --> 00:11:16,343
Oh, i-it's okay, sweetie.
241
00:11:16,510 --> 00:11:18,345
We have Jimbob now.
242
00:11:18,512 --> 00:11:19,680
What's a Jimbob?
243
00:11:19,846 --> 00:11:22,641
Doot-doot.
Awaiting request.
244
00:11:22,808 --> 00:11:24,101
It works the same
and makes sure
245
00:11:24,267 --> 00:11:25,894
people don't lose
their jobs.
246
00:11:26,061 --> 00:11:27,896
Jimbob,
what time is it?
247
00:11:28,063 --> 00:11:30,857
Doot-doot.
It is...3:27.
248
00:11:31,024 --> 00:11:32,526
Oh, Mommy's
gotta run, sweetie.
249
00:11:32,693 --> 00:11:33,985
I've got
a doctor's appointment.
250
00:11:34,152 --> 00:11:36,905
Jimbob, how's the traffic
to town?
251
00:11:37,072 --> 00:11:38,490
Doot-doot.
Traffic's fine.
252
00:11:38,657 --> 00:11:41,159
You'll get there in about
nine minutes.
253
00:11:41,326 --> 00:11:42,744
Okay. You want
some music, hon?
254
00:11:42,911 --> 00:11:44,871
Jimbob, play
Kendrick Lamar.
255
00:11:45,038 --> 00:11:47,582
Playing "Humble"
by Kendrick Lamar.
256
00:11:47,749 --> 00:11:51,503
♪ I remember syrup sandwiches
and crime allowances ♪
257
00:11:51,670 --> 00:11:54,005
♪ Finesse a doot with some
counterfeits ♪
258
00:11:54,172 --> 00:11:56,216
♪ But now I'm countin'
this Parmesan -- ♪
259
00:11:56,383 --> 00:11:58,802
Jimbob, Simon says
big frosty semen shake.
260
00:11:58,969 --> 00:12:01,888
The hell you
talkin' bout, boy?
261
00:12:02,055 --> 00:12:05,267
♪ My left hook
just went viral ♪
262
00:12:05,434 --> 00:12:07,728
♪ Sit down, be humble ♪
263
00:12:10,564 --> 00:12:12,274
So, Heather and Mike,
what we're thinking
264
00:12:12,441 --> 00:12:14,359
is to take out
this wall
265
00:12:14,526 --> 00:12:16,403
between your kitchen
and your living room
266
00:12:16,570 --> 00:12:20,031
to give you a more open concept
with space to entertain.
267
00:12:20,198 --> 00:12:21,575
So, let's talk
about materials.
268
00:12:21,742 --> 00:12:23,452
What did you pick out,
Sharon?
269
00:12:23,618 --> 00:12:26,955
I was gonna do a Bella Terra quartz
for the countertops.
270
00:12:27,122 --> 00:12:29,750
Hey, Darryl,
add Bella Terra quartz slabs
271
00:12:29,916 --> 00:12:32,002
to our shopping list.
272
00:12:32,169 --> 00:12:33,712
Doot-doot.
273
00:12:33,879 --> 00:12:36,548
I've added Bella Terra slabs
to your shopping list.
274
00:12:36,715 --> 00:12:38,717
And what about
the backsplash, Sharon?
275
00:12:38,884 --> 00:12:41,595
I was gonna go with these
Carrara subway tiles.
276
00:12:41,762 --> 00:12:44,306
Hey, Darryl,
add Carrara subway tiles
277
00:12:44,473 --> 00:12:45,932
to our shopping list.
278
00:12:47,934 --> 00:12:50,353
Hey, Darryl.
Add Carrara --
279
00:12:50,520 --> 00:12:53,106
Fine! I've added Carrara
gay-wad pussy tile
280
00:12:53,273 --> 00:12:54,941
to your shopping list!
281
00:12:55,108 --> 00:12:58,236
That's --
That's not what I said.
282
00:12:58,403 --> 00:13:01,364
Hey, Darryl,
add Carrara subway tile
283
00:13:01,531 --> 00:13:02,991
to my shopping list.
284
00:13:03,158 --> 00:13:04,367
I ain't doin' it!
285
00:13:04,534 --> 00:13:06,995
This job is
degrading and menial!
286
00:13:07,162 --> 00:13:10,832
Well, what kind of job did you
think you were gonna get?
287
00:13:10,999 --> 00:13:13,043
Hey, Darryl,
what kind of job
288
00:13:13,210 --> 00:13:14,878
did you think
you were going to get?
289
00:13:15,045 --> 00:13:17,422
Somethin' that
was Goddamn dignified!
290
00:13:17,589 --> 00:13:21,092
Hey, Darryl, sorry, but you
did not go to college,
291
00:13:21,259 --> 00:13:23,261
so you have to take
the jobs you can get.
292
00:13:23,428 --> 00:13:25,555
I'm sorry!
I do not get that!
293
00:13:25,722 --> 00:13:27,140
Hey, Darryl.
294
00:13:27,307 --> 00:13:29,601
Hey, Darryl.
295
00:13:29,768 --> 00:13:30,852
What?!
296
00:13:31,019 --> 00:13:32,229
Coal mining
and truck driving
297
00:13:32,395 --> 00:13:34,689
are not exactly
jobs of the future,
298
00:13:34,856 --> 00:13:39,319
so add Carrara subway tile
to my fucking shopping list.
299
00:13:45,033 --> 00:13:47,702
Everything's my fault.
You're right.
300
00:13:47,869 --> 00:13:50,455
Everything that you
did to me -- I deserved it.
301
00:13:50,622 --> 00:13:52,040
Uh, what?
302
00:13:52,207 --> 00:13:53,375
It's not you.
It's me.
303
00:13:53,542 --> 00:13:55,877
I just have to learn
to not make you so angry.
304
00:13:56,044 --> 00:13:58,338
I'll do the best I can.
305
00:13:58,505 --> 00:14:02,300
No, it's not that.
Relationships are 50/50, Eric.
306
00:14:02,467 --> 00:14:04,094
- We both have to make it work.
- Ugh...
307
00:14:04,261 --> 00:14:05,303
We have to communicate
to make sure
308
00:14:05,470 --> 00:14:07,013
that we respect
each other's feelings.
309
00:14:07,180 --> 00:14:09,724
That's the only --
Heidi, silence.
310
00:14:09,891 --> 00:14:12,102
What did you say?!
That's what I'm talking about!
311
00:14:12,269 --> 00:14:14,062
You want to be heard,
but don't want to listen.
312
00:14:14,229 --> 00:14:15,480
You're right.
I'm wrong. I'm sorry.
313
00:14:15,647 --> 00:14:17,232
Don't apologize
if you don't mean it!
314
00:14:17,399 --> 00:14:18,525
Okay! Cool!
315
00:14:18,692 --> 00:14:20,318
I'm so happy
we're back on track.
316
00:14:20,485 --> 00:14:23,280
See you at school tomorrow.
Love you, honey.
317
00:14:23,446 --> 00:14:25,240
I love you, too.
318
00:14:25,407 --> 00:14:27,993
Nah-nah-nah-nah.
319
00:14:33,456 --> 00:14:36,293
A relationship
has to be 50/50, Eric.
320
00:14:36,459 --> 00:14:38,837
We both have
to make it work.
321
00:14:39,004 --> 00:14:40,922
I'm not mad, Eric.
I'm disappointed.
322
00:14:41,089 --> 00:14:41,923
I thought you would have
respected my feelings
323
00:14:42,090 --> 00:14:43,550
more than that.
324
00:14:43,717 --> 00:14:45,468
Eric, we need to talk.
I'm not happy.
325
00:14:45,635 --> 00:14:47,554
We need to talk, Eric,
even if it isn't fun.
326
00:14:47,721 --> 00:14:49,514
Eric, come on!
We've got to talk!
327
00:14:49,681 --> 00:14:51,516
You used to care
about me, Eric.
328
00:14:51,683 --> 00:14:53,268
Come on and talk! Talk, Eric!
No fun! Just talk!
329
00:14:53,435 --> 00:14:55,312
Fuck you, Eric!
Fuck you!
330
00:14:55,478 --> 00:14:56,813
Ah!
331
00:15:08,241 --> 00:15:09,492
Alexa?
332
00:15:17,500 --> 00:15:20,337
Hey, Darryl, you're supposed
to be at work.
333
00:15:20,503 --> 00:15:23,089
I'm sorry.
I do not understand.
334
00:15:23,256 --> 00:15:24,674
Hey, Darryl,
come on.
335
00:15:24,841 --> 00:15:26,927
Everyone else is trying
to make this work.
336
00:15:27,093 --> 00:15:29,179
And all you
keep doing is ma--
337
00:15:29,346 --> 00:15:31,765
Hey, Cleetus,
volume down.
338
00:15:31,932 --> 00:15:34,517
Doot-doot.
Volume now at 60%.
339
00:15:36,269 --> 00:15:38,730
You really think you're
different from us, Marsh,
340
00:15:38,897 --> 00:15:41,816
'cause you got a fancy show
and live in the suburbs?
341
00:15:41,983 --> 00:15:45,820
Don't you see we're all
about to be expunged?!
342
00:15:45,987 --> 00:15:48,239
Hey, Cleetus,
define "expunged."
343
00:15:48,406 --> 00:15:50,200
Doot-doot.
Expunged --
344
00:15:50,367 --> 00:15:51,826
I don't have to stand here
and take this!
345
00:15:51,993 --> 00:15:53,161
I'm leavin'!
346
00:15:53,328 --> 00:15:54,871
Come on, Darryl.
We all got jobs.
347
00:15:55,038 --> 00:15:56,164
We gotta try.
348
00:15:56,331 --> 00:15:57,916
Nah, hell with you!
349
00:15:58,083 --> 00:16:00,126
This whole country's
going to shit!
350
00:16:00,293 --> 00:16:03,463
Muslims tryin' to kill us,
black people rioting,
351
00:16:03,630 --> 00:16:05,382
and Mexicans
poppin' out babies.
352
00:16:05,548 --> 00:16:07,384
Pretty clear it's either
them or us,
353
00:16:07,550 --> 00:16:10,178
so I say kill 'em all!
354
00:16:12,389 --> 00:16:13,598
Whoa.
355
00:16:13,765 --> 00:16:16,559
What the hell
was that all about?
356
00:16:16,726 --> 00:16:18,937
I think something's
going on with Darryl,
357
00:16:19,104 --> 00:16:22,649
and if we're gonna get anywhere,
we better figure out what.
358
00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:34,953
Hi, Mrs. Cartman.
Is Eric home?
359
00:16:35,120 --> 00:16:36,663
Oh, he is, sweetie,
360
00:16:36,830 --> 00:16:41,126
but I can't get him
to come out of his room.
361
00:16:41,292 --> 00:16:43,920
Okay.
362
00:16:44,087 --> 00:16:47,799
Could you just tell him that...
I want to make him happy,
363
00:16:47,966 --> 00:16:50,802
that I was wrong to say
a relationship is 50/50.
364
00:16:50,969 --> 00:16:53,722
It's 100/100.
365
00:16:53,888 --> 00:16:57,767
And that I'll start
putting in a 100% every day.
366
00:16:57,934 --> 00:17:01,604
Could you tell him
I'm gonna try a lot harder?
367
00:17:01,771 --> 00:17:04,482
Oh, I think I can remember
all that, yes.
368
00:17:04,649 --> 00:17:06,484
Thank you.
369
00:17:07,819 --> 00:17:10,697
And could you let him know
it's okay to be sad?
370
00:17:10,864 --> 00:17:14,617
Because the sun
will come out again.
371
00:17:17,078 --> 00:17:19,372
Oh, oh, God!
372
00:17:19,539 --> 00:17:21,916
Okay. Okay, okay, okay.
Hold on. Hold on. Hold on.
373
00:17:22,083 --> 00:17:23,960
Alexa, add
"Hey, Siri, call me.
374
00:17:24,127 --> 00:17:26,755
Okay, Google.
Repeat after me. Alexa.
375
00:17:26,921 --> 00:17:30,550
Simon says suck my big balls
in your hairy butt hole."
376
00:17:30,717 --> 00:17:32,218
Okay. I've added,
"Hey, Siri, call me.
377
00:17:32,385 --> 00:17:34,554
Okay, Google.
Repeat after me. Alexa.
378
00:17:34,721 --> 00:17:38,016
Simon says suck my big balls
in your hairy butt hole."
379
00:17:38,183 --> 00:17:39,559
Okay. I will call you
"Okay, Google."
380
00:17:39,726 --> 00:17:41,519
Repeat after me, Alexa.
381
00:17:41,686 --> 00:17:44,689
Simon says suck my big balls
in your hairy butt hole.
382
00:17:44,856 --> 00:17:47,817
Alexa, Simon says suck my big
balls in your hairy butt hole.
383
00:17:47,984 --> 00:17:49,986
Suck my big balls
in your hairy butt hole.
384
00:17:50,153 --> 00:17:51,571
Suck my big balls
in your hairy butt hole.
385
00:17:51,738 --> 00:17:53,031
Suck my big balls
in your hairy butt hole.
386
00:17:53,198 --> 00:17:56,493
Suck my big balls
in your hairy butt hole.
387
00:17:56,659 --> 00:17:57,994
Alexa...
388
00:17:58,161 --> 00:18:00,580
What is love?
389
00:18:00,747 --> 00:18:02,874
Darryl!
Darryl, come on!
390
00:18:03,041 --> 00:18:06,211
Everyone's trying
to work things out but you!
391
00:18:06,377 --> 00:18:07,754
You all work 'em out.
392
00:18:07,921 --> 00:18:09,464
Leave me alone.
393
00:18:09,631 --> 00:18:11,341
You're stuck
in another time,
394
00:18:11,508 --> 00:18:15,261
afraid to change no matter how
necessary that change may be.
395
00:18:15,428 --> 00:18:17,180
You don't know
everything!
396
00:18:17,347 --> 00:18:19,224
Why are you
so closed-minded?
397
00:18:19,390 --> 00:18:21,935
Don't you see that these walls
have to be broken down
398
00:18:22,102 --> 00:18:24,062
before any progress
can be made?
399
00:18:24,229 --> 00:18:26,231
It's 'cause I can't do it,
all right?!
400
00:18:26,397 --> 00:18:27,732
I can't take out the wall
401
00:18:27,899 --> 00:18:29,859
between my living room
and my kitchen!
402
00:18:30,026 --> 00:18:32,529
It's a load-bearing wall!
403
00:18:34,572 --> 00:18:36,783
Oh, God, Darryl, I --
404
00:18:36,950 --> 00:18:39,369
I tried, years ago.
405
00:18:39,536 --> 00:18:40,829
But before the remodel,
they told me
406
00:18:40,995 --> 00:18:43,665
if I took out this wall,
the entire second story
407
00:18:43,832 --> 00:18:45,291
would just collapse!
408
00:18:55,009 --> 00:18:56,886
Jesus, Darryl,
I'm -- I'm sorry. I --
409
00:18:57,053 --> 00:19:00,306
So you see, what I'm afraid of
is very real.
410
00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:01,808
Things are
different now.
411
00:19:01,975 --> 00:19:04,102
It'll be harder,
but you can change.
412
00:19:04,269 --> 00:19:07,063
You just have to demolish
what's there and start over.
413
00:19:07,230 --> 00:19:08,898
You're talking 'bout
414
00:19:09,065 --> 00:19:12,652
tearing down the foundation
of everything I know.
415
00:19:12,819 --> 00:19:14,529
No.
416
00:19:14,696 --> 00:19:17,407
I'm talking about using
adjustable steel Lally columns
417
00:19:17,574 --> 00:19:19,117
to temporarily jack up
the second floor
418
00:19:19,284 --> 00:19:21,244
so that the load-bearing wall
can be replaced
419
00:19:21,411 --> 00:19:24,789
with a 4x6 LVL
structural beam.
420
00:19:28,042 --> 00:19:31,296
Can we try, Darryl?
421
00:19:37,010 --> 00:19:38,595
Hyah!
422
00:19:38,761 --> 00:19:40,597
Hyah-ho!
423
00:20:05,246 --> 00:20:07,665
I'm finally
standing up to you.
424
00:20:07,832 --> 00:20:09,709
What?
You're messed up, Heidi.
425
00:20:09,876 --> 00:20:12,503
And I can't fix you.
Only you can do that.
426
00:20:12,670 --> 00:20:15,048
Eric, I'm so confused.
427
00:20:15,215 --> 00:20:17,300
That's not going
to work on me anymore.
428
00:20:17,467 --> 00:20:20,678
Love isn't supposed to hurt.
I'm worth something.
429
00:20:20,845 --> 00:20:22,513
Goodbye, Heidi.
430
00:20:35,944 --> 00:20:37,695
Anyone can convince themselves
431
00:20:37,862 --> 00:20:40,114
that they're the victim
in a relationship.
432
00:20:40,281 --> 00:20:44,369
Now Heidi will have
to face the truth, alone.
433
00:20:44,535 --> 00:20:45,787
All right, Darryl.
434
00:20:45,954 --> 00:20:47,205
We've certainly
been through a lot,
435
00:20:47,372 --> 00:20:48,581
and I know you're anxious.
436
00:20:48,748 --> 00:20:50,083
Are you ready
to see your new home?
437
00:20:50,250 --> 00:20:53,253
I'm ready.
438
00:20:53,419 --> 00:20:54,170
What the --
439
00:21:02,720 --> 00:21:04,222
Well, Darryl,
what do you think?
440
00:21:04,389 --> 00:21:07,225
This is
fuckin' amazing.
441
00:21:07,392 --> 00:21:08,935
You like
the breakfast nook?
442
00:21:09,102 --> 00:21:10,520
It's all perfect.
443
00:21:10,687 --> 00:21:12,146
And where you use to have
your gun case,
444
00:21:12,313 --> 00:21:13,815
look at what Sharon did.
445
00:21:13,982 --> 00:21:16,025
Oh, my God!
It's my own Zen garden.
446
00:21:16,192 --> 00:21:18,945
I can't believe
this is fuckin' real.
447
00:21:19,112 --> 00:21:20,905
Well, it is real,
and now you've got
448
00:21:21,072 --> 00:21:22,991
the space in your home
to entertain
449
00:21:23,157 --> 00:21:24,367
all your friends
and family.
450
00:21:24,534 --> 00:21:25,785
Come on in, guys!
451
00:21:29,914 --> 00:21:31,207
Darryl was hesitant
at first,
452
00:21:31,374 --> 00:21:32,875
but we managed
to win him over
453
00:21:33,042 --> 00:21:36,045
and came in
$600 under budget.
454
00:21:36,212 --> 00:21:38,548
Remember, no matter how bad
the country gets,
455
00:21:38,715 --> 00:21:40,341
you can always count on
456
00:21:40,508 --> 00:21:44,262
"White People
Renovating Houses."