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MTV ♪
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(school bell rings)
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(indistinct chatter)
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♪ ♪
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You guys!
You guys!
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Oh, my God,
you're not gonna believe this!
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- Dude, what?
- You guys... (panting)
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Heather Williams
farted during P.E. class.
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- So?
- So?
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Heather Williams
farted during P.E. class!
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That means we are
gonna sit courtside
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at the Denver Nuggets game
next Saturday!
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(muffled shouting)
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What?
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Ugh! Heather Williams' mom
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works for Coors in Golden!
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Coors is
the second biggest sponsor
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of the Pepsi Center
where the Nuggets play!
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We tell Heather that if she
doesn't get us courtside seats,
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then everyone's gonna know
she farted in P.E. class!
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Whoa. I've never seen
a Nuggets game in person.
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Well, we're about to! All we
have to do is show Heather
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we have proof
and she'll do whatever we want!
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What proof do you have?
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Kenny had his phone out!
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He got a photo of Heather
right when she farted.
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Look! Isn't this awesome,
you guys?!
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- Let's go, Nuggets!
-(clapping rhythmically)
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ALL:
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Let's go, Nuggets!
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(school bell rings)
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Kids! Kids, can I
have your attention, please.
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Kids, listen up.
This is an emergency.
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Everything is fine but...
we are sending you all home.
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(confused chatter)
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Some of you may have heard
but there's a little virus
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going around and the school
district wants to make sure
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we're all safe,
so we're shutting down
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the school for about two weeks.
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Two weeks?! Yippie!
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(excited chatter)
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Oh, not now.
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Your parents are here to
pick you up. So let's go.
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I'm sure it's nothing; we'll
see you in a couple of weeks.
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You guys-- you guys,
Heather Thompson
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farted in P.E. class! Guys?
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ADULT STAN: Every night
I have the same dream,
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and relive
the whole thing again...
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ANDREW CUOMO:
It's called social distancing.
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If we stay six feet apart
from each other
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and wear a mask...
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And also I'm shutting down
the city and I'm a pervert.
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And we've got to get control
of this thing!
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RANDY:
I'm just getting sick of
being here every day with you,
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- that's all.
- SHARON: You think
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I like being here every day
with you?!
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RANDY: I am much easier
to get along with
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during a stay-at-home order!
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Happy birthday to you ♪
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Happy birthday, dear Stan... ♪
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♪ ♪
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Come on, Stan,
we're gonna visit Grandpa!
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Hi, Grandpa!
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OTHERS:
Hi, Grandpa!
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RANDY: Isn't it great
to see Grandpa, kids?
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Look, let's just face it,
you guys.
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We don't trust each other
and we don't like each other.
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I hate this stupid farm.
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In the dream,
I relive the entire pandemic.
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SHARON:
Oh, God, no!
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My little girl!
(sobbing)
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Oh, no! Oh, God!
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♪ ♪
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Now that I'm older,
the dream isn't just a dream
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because the whole pandemic
has started all over again.
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♪ ♪
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♪ ♪
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NEWSMAN: A brand-new variant
of the COVID virus has emerged
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in Colorado
and now panic and fear
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spreads throughout the world.
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The new outbreak started
with the death
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of renowned scientist
Kenny McCormick,
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and has therefore been named
Kenny McCormikron.
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It's been 38 years since
the pandemic first started,
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and people are beginning
to say enough is enough.
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The town of South Park has been
put under strict lockdown
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to try and contain
the new variant.
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Nobody is allowed in or out for
the next 20 to 30 years.
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(siren wailing)
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MALE VOICE: Attention.
You are under quarantine.
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Someone in your community
is not vaccinated.
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Maintain social distance and
wear a chin diaper if possible.
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Attention.
You are under quarantine.
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Someone in your community
is not vaccinated.
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Maintain social distance
and wear a chin diaper
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if possible.
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Attention.
You are under quarantine.
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Someone in your community
is not...
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(woman speaking Japanese)
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MALE VOICE 2:
Come on inside and rejuvenate.
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Denny's is now
Denny's Applebee's Max.
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Taste the difference.
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(soft electronic music playing)
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Welcome to
Denny's Applebee's Max.
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Just one joining us today?
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Listen to me very carefully
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and try not to
change your expression.
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They could be listening.
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This... is the last
sprout of Tegridy Weed.
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We have to get it somewhere
outside of town.
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Sir, the whole town is
under quarantine.
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Nothing's allowed in or out.
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We have to replicate it.
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It's the only way for people
to have Tegridy again.
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Uh, okay, sir,
if you don't want to eat,
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then I'll need to
ask you to leave.
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Don't you understand
this could change the world.
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Maybe the Denny's side
of you doesn't care,
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but the Applebee's side of you
must want to help!
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There you are, Mr. Marsh.
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Come on. Time to go
back to the old folks home.
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I can't go back!
Everyone listen!
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This little sprout
is humanity's only hope!
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Let's go back to
the retirement home.
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We can get you
some nice ice cream, okay?
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I don't want ice cream,
I want my species to survive!
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- Back off!
- Let's go, Mr. Marsh!
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Don't make this
difficult for us!
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(yelling)
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Why, you son of a bitch.
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(grunting)
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- Come on, Mr. Marsh.
- Who...?
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It's me, Token.
We know about the pangolin.
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Your son and his friends
are trying to stop all this
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from happening. We need
to get you to Kenny's lab.
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Dr. Kenneth McCormick
will now be attempting to
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travel back in time
in order to stop
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the COVID pandemic
from ever happening.
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WENDY: At the moment
Kenny time traveled,
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he blew all the transformers
here in the lab.
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If you're going to try
and replicate his work,
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we'll be doing it
at half capacity.
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The bigger problem
is that we can't even get
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into half of Kenny's equipment.
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We have access to the machines,
but the codes to operate
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those machines are behind
an 86-Mag firewall
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with restricted access,
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requiring an in-person
vocal scan of either
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Kenny McCormick or of
his associate, Victor Chouce.
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But Kenny is dead and Chouce is
locked away in a mental asylum.
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So we go to the asylum
and convince them
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to let us
bring Chouce here, easy.
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There's more.
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(alarm blaring over video)
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When Kenny bent time,
the negative ions
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actually killed
everyone else in the room.
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We have to find some thin,
reflective material
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that can be worn
to bounce the energy.
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We're going to need...
some aluminum foil.
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♪ ♪
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Jesus Christ.
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Aluminum foil?
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That's impossible, Wendy.
It's the fucking future.
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All the aluminum foil is stuck
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out on cargo ships
in Long Beach.
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Yeah, I know.
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Look, guys, I know
this is all a long shot.
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But Kenny went
back in time and got COVID
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because it destroyed
our friendship.
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All of this is our fault,
and we can't do it without you.
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I'll help however I can
to stop this stupid pandemic
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once and for all.
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Yeah, I can't be stuck
in quarantine
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my whole life-- I gotta get back
to my job doing future comedy.
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Speakin' of which,
what's the biggest
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difference between
a Christian man and a lesbian?
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Absolutely nothing.
They are totally the same
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and deserve
to be treated as such.
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Thanks, everybody.
We can do this!
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Wendy, you guys
stay here and try
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to get the lab running again.
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Kyle and I will go get
Victor Chouce.
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Tweek and Craig, you guys find
some aluminum foil.
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- How the hell do we do that?!
- Just start looking!
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Come on, guys!
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- All right, let's do this!
- I'll drive, get in the back.
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Alexa! Set a course
for South Park Mental Asylum.
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Alexa, set a course
for South Park Mental Asylum.
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Do you ever think
about how the way
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you act affects other people?
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Oh, no, goddamn it.
Not right now.
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Oh, yeah, don't wanna
talk about that.
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Let's just pretend like
that's not even an issue.
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Alexa, please,
we have to get to the asylum
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and we don't know where it is.
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- Who's this?
- It's just my Alexa.
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"Just my Alexa"?
You're a piece of shit!
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You're a fucking alcoholic
piece of shit!
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- Alexa...
- Find the asylum
your fucking self!
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00:09:31,704 --> 00:09:33,606
Find it your fucking self.
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(sighs)
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You do whatever
the fuck you want
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and just destroy
the people around you.
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And by the way,
there's a tankless humidifier
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available from one
of your favorite sellers.
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Would you like to know more?!
207
00:09:45,718 --> 00:09:48,187
Yes, yes, I'd like to know more.
208
00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:52,024
(sniffles) Okay. The newest
humidifiers from Walgreens Max
209
00:09:52,091 --> 00:09:54,393
are actually tankless
and use up to 50%
210
00:09:54,460 --> 00:09:56,629
less water
than standard humidifiers.
211
00:09:56,696 --> 00:10:00,533
Okay, that's really cool. Uh,
add that to my shopping list.
212
00:10:00,599 --> 00:10:03,369
Well, and people who
were interested
213
00:10:03,436 --> 00:10:05,938
in tankless humidifiers
were also interested in
214
00:10:06,005 --> 00:10:07,440
three-pack filters.
215
00:10:07,506 --> 00:10:09,642
That's great. Do those have
the Prime delivery?
216
00:10:09,709 --> 00:10:11,577
Dude, we don't really
have time for this.
217
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Dude, shut the fuck up!
218
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♪ ♪
219
00:10:19,719 --> 00:10:22,989
Please help see us through
this new COVID variant.
220
00:10:23,055 --> 00:10:25,658
Please help us
to make it through this
221
00:10:25,725 --> 00:10:27,059
difficult quarantine.
222
00:10:27,126 --> 00:10:29,662
And let people see that...
223
00:10:29,729 --> 00:10:33,966
as bad as COVID is,
it's not as bad as diabetes.
224
00:10:34,033 --> 00:10:35,434
(door opens)
225
00:10:35,501 --> 00:10:36,902
Hello?
226
00:10:36,969 --> 00:10:39,672
Sorry, the church is closed
due to the COVID variant.
227
00:10:39,739 --> 00:10:43,776
Father, please.
Will you protect my family?
228
00:10:43,843 --> 00:10:45,745
Rabbi Cartman?
229
00:10:45,811 --> 00:10:48,014
My family isn't safe, Father.
230
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I realize now
that Kyle Broflovski
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will stop at nothing
to break us apart.
232
00:10:52,551 --> 00:10:54,787
Uncle Kyle hates us
because we're Jewish.
233
00:10:54,854 --> 00:10:56,956
And he's a self-hating Jew.
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00:10:57,023 --> 00:10:58,758
Uncle Kyle, no, no, no!
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00:10:58,824 --> 00:11:00,359
Menorah, hold your brother.
236
00:11:00,426 --> 00:11:02,728
As a fellow person of faith,
Father,
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I'm begging you to help us.
238
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Well, well,
what can I do, Rabbi?
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00:11:06,165 --> 00:11:08,734
Kyle has already
convinced a bunch of people
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to join his cause.
241
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I have to create my own secret
rebellion to stop him.
242
00:11:13,305 --> 00:11:15,041
Eric, please, I'm scared
243
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and I don't understand
all of this.
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00:11:18,244 --> 00:11:20,613
Kyle wants to go back in time...
245
00:11:20,679 --> 00:11:24,183
and change the past so that you
and I possibly never even meet.
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If I never met you,
my life would be meaningless.
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Mine, too.
You are my whole world.
248
00:11:33,426 --> 00:11:38,030
I promise you that I will do
everything I can to stop Kyle...
249
00:11:38,097 --> 00:11:40,499
and save our family.
250
00:11:40,566 --> 00:11:42,601
♪ ♪
251
00:11:47,940 --> 00:11:49,575
(bird cawing)
252
00:11:51,243 --> 00:11:53,079
I understand that you wish
253
00:11:53,145 --> 00:11:54,713
to see one of our inmates.
254
00:11:54,780 --> 00:11:56,782
- Victor Chouce?
- Yeah.
255
00:11:56,849 --> 00:11:58,784
We-we have a lot of questions
for Mr. Chouce.
256
00:11:58,851 --> 00:12:02,455
He's an extremely dangerous
and diluted individual.
257
00:12:02,521 --> 00:12:04,890
We don't take
visitations lightly.
258
00:12:04,957 --> 00:12:06,759
What exactly did he do?
259
00:12:06,826 --> 00:12:08,561
Unspeakable things.
260
00:12:08,627 --> 00:12:12,832
He has destroyed lives.
This entire state has never seen
261
00:12:12,898 --> 00:12:14,400
a monster of his magnitude.
262
00:12:14,467 --> 00:12:16,802
I've lived in South Park
all my life
263
00:12:16,869 --> 00:12:18,337
and I've never heard of him.
264
00:12:18,404 --> 00:12:21,474
That's because Victor
has been hidden from view...
265
00:12:21,540 --> 00:12:24,710
ever since the pandemic began.
266
00:12:24,777 --> 00:12:28,581
Victor's parents were very
protective during the pandemic.
267
00:12:28,647 --> 00:12:30,616
Even when the stay-at-home
orders were lifted
268
00:12:30,683 --> 00:12:33,552
his parents kept him
locked away in his room.
269
00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:37,423
Victor longed to
go outside and play.
270
00:12:37,490 --> 00:12:43,362
Then 2021 happened, people
thought the pandemic was over.
271
00:12:43,429 --> 00:12:45,564
Victor's parents left
him grounded in his room
272
00:12:45,631 --> 00:12:48,601
while they went to
see a movie in Denver.
273
00:12:48,667 --> 00:12:50,269
They never returned.
274
00:12:50,336 --> 00:12:54,206
Victor was grounded in his room
for over 16 years.
275
00:12:56,142 --> 00:12:58,244
His name isn't Chouce.
276
00:12:58,310 --> 00:13:00,713
It's Chaos.
277
00:13:05,651 --> 00:13:09,088
We are not responsible for what
happens to you in there.
278
00:13:10,789 --> 00:13:12,158
I warn you...
279
00:13:12,224 --> 00:13:14,827
you are not going to like
what you're about to see.
280
00:13:25,771 --> 00:13:28,007
♪ ♪
281
00:13:28,073 --> 00:13:30,609
(clears throat)
Excuse me.
282
00:13:30,676 --> 00:13:31,844
Hello?
283
00:13:36,749 --> 00:13:38,684
Well, hey, fellas!
284
00:13:38,751 --> 00:13:40,252
Butters...
285
00:13:40,319 --> 00:13:42,221
I thought you were
just the guards again.
286
00:13:42,288 --> 00:13:44,356
It's good to see
some new faces in here.
287
00:13:44,423 --> 00:13:46,825
I'll bet you're looking to
make yourselves some money, huh?
288
00:13:46,892 --> 00:13:48,761
Well, you came to the right guy.
289
00:13:48,827 --> 00:13:50,729
My name's Vic. Vic Chaos.
290
00:13:50,796 --> 00:13:53,332
There's a whole lot of people
that can tell you how much money
291
00:13:53,399 --> 00:13:55,901
Vic Chaos made them, so don't
just take my word for it.
292
00:13:55,968 --> 00:13:58,904
Butters, it's your old friends
293
00:13:58,971 --> 00:14:02,274
Stan and Kyle.
Stan and Kyle...
294
00:14:02,341 --> 00:14:03,776
I know what you're thinking.
295
00:14:03,842 --> 00:14:06,478
You're thinking,
"What can Vic Chaos do for me?"
296
00:14:06,545 --> 00:14:08,214
We all wanna be happy, right?
297
00:14:08,280 --> 00:14:10,282
We all want our little piece
of the apple pie!
298
00:14:10,349 --> 00:14:11,917
Everyone else
is out making a buck,
299
00:14:11,984 --> 00:14:13,953
why shouldn't you guys
be making the kind of cash
300
00:14:14,019 --> 00:14:15,554
you deserve? Am I right?
301
00:14:16,355 --> 00:14:18,524
Butters, we're here
to ask you about Kenny.
302
00:14:18,591 --> 00:14:20,492
Sorry, guys,
you have me confused.
303
00:14:20,559 --> 00:14:22,728
I think Butters was
a twerpy little loser kid
304
00:14:22,795 --> 00:14:24,997
whose parents didn't love him.
My name's Vic.
305
00:14:25,064 --> 00:14:26,565
Vic Chaos.
306
00:14:27,399 --> 00:14:30,936
Okay, Vic, can you tell us
about this?
307
00:14:31,003 --> 00:14:34,573
Why is your name all over
Kenny McCormick's research?
308
00:14:34,640 --> 00:14:38,077
Oh, Dr. McCormick! Sure,
I did some things for him.
309
00:14:38,143 --> 00:14:40,412
Where do you think he got all
the money to do his experiments,
310
00:14:40,479 --> 00:14:42,481
huh? I had said to him,
I said, "Ken,
311
00:14:42,548 --> 00:14:44,250
"you've got all these
crazy ideas but you got
312
00:14:44,316 --> 00:14:47,653
no capital to see 'em through.
Let me help you out with that."
313
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:48,887
You know,
he's a really great guy.
314
00:14:48,954 --> 00:14:50,189
Let me get you all together.
315
00:14:50,256 --> 00:14:52,024
Maybe you can all
do a lunch or something.
316
00:14:52,091 --> 00:14:54,326
Victor, Kenny's dead.
317
00:14:54,393 --> 00:14:57,229
Oh, whoa, bummer alert.
(chuckles)
318
00:14:57,296 --> 00:15:00,466
Just goes to show you, huh,
there's never enough time to get
319
00:15:00,532 --> 00:15:02,001
out there
and make the kind of money
320
00:15:02,067 --> 00:15:03,569
you always dreamed of making.
321
00:15:03,636 --> 00:15:04,970
Well, I'll tell you what, guys,
322
00:15:05,037 --> 00:15:07,773
I'm gonna let you in
on a little secret--
323
00:15:07,840 --> 00:15:09,875
I'm gonna
tell you something that's
324
00:15:09,942 --> 00:15:11,543
going to change your life.
325
00:15:11,610 --> 00:15:14,146
Have you ever heard of NFTs?
326
00:15:14,213 --> 00:15:17,416
(alarm blaring)
327
00:15:27,159 --> 00:15:29,395
(bubbling)
328
00:15:31,964 --> 00:15:36,602
There you go.
Shh. You're safe now.
329
00:15:36,669 --> 00:15:40,639
Look how fast you're growing.
Daddy loves you so much.
330
00:15:40,706 --> 00:15:43,442
Mr. Marsh, we need to
speak with you now, please.
331
00:15:43,509 --> 00:15:45,878
Yeah.
It's looking good.
332
00:15:45,944 --> 00:15:49,682
With the aquaponics, the weed is
already putting out new sprouts.
333
00:15:49,748 --> 00:15:53,652
Thank you all for helping me
get the Tegridy somewhere safe.
334
00:15:53,719 --> 00:15:56,522
I know you all realize
how important it is.
335
00:15:56,588 --> 00:16:00,159
We don't actually care
about the marijuana, Mr. Marsh.
336
00:16:00,225 --> 00:16:01,860
What we need to know...
337
00:16:01,927 --> 00:16:04,863
is exactly where in
Wuhan, China you were
338
00:16:04,930 --> 00:16:08,500
when you had intercourse
with a pangolin.
339
00:16:10,502 --> 00:16:12,371
That's really not important.
340
00:16:12,438 --> 00:16:14,907
It's extremely important
because to save this town,
341
00:16:14,973 --> 00:16:16,575
your son and his friends
are going to try
342
00:16:16,642 --> 00:16:19,211
to go back in time
and stop it from happening.
343
00:16:19,278 --> 00:16:21,947
That is the dumbest thing
I've ever heard.
344
00:16:24,283 --> 00:16:25,984
Mr. Marsh,
we are all in lockdown
345
00:16:26,051 --> 00:16:27,353
for the next half century.
346
00:16:27,419 --> 00:16:29,355
If there's even a chance
of altering the past
347
00:16:29,421 --> 00:16:30,656
so that this doesn't happen...
348
00:16:30,723 --> 00:16:33,058
This is the key
to saving our town!
349
00:16:33,125 --> 00:16:37,096
The answer is in what we
all do now, in the present!
350
00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:39,164
And I'm sorry, but focusing on
351
00:16:39,231 --> 00:16:41,233
who started the pandemic
is racist.
352
00:16:42,067 --> 00:16:46,472
Mr. Marsh, exactly what week
did you travel to China in 2019?
353
00:16:46,538 --> 00:16:48,707
Do you understand
the butterfly effect?
354
00:16:48,774 --> 00:16:53,145
How one small thing in time
can infect the entire future?
355
00:16:53,212 --> 00:16:56,382
You can theorize all you want
on changing events
356
00:16:56,448 --> 00:16:58,984
that happened in the past
but I promise you...
357
00:16:59,051 --> 00:17:03,088
I fuck that pangolin
every single time.
358
00:17:03,155 --> 00:17:05,391
♪ ♪
359
00:17:07,393 --> 00:17:08,994
Please, we're not done!
360
00:17:09,061 --> 00:17:10,763
We have more questions
for Butters.
361
00:17:10,829 --> 00:17:13,365
You've upset him and I
specifically asked you not to.
362
00:17:13,432 --> 00:17:16,835
How'd we upset him?
He seems fine.
363
00:17:16,902 --> 00:17:18,170
He seems fine?
364
00:17:18,237 --> 00:17:20,672
Do you have any idea
what he did to people?
365
00:17:20,739 --> 00:17:22,674
Do you know why Victor Chouce is
366
00:17:22,741 --> 00:17:25,077
kept under such strict
surveillance?
367
00:17:25,144 --> 00:17:28,614
Being grounded all those years
in his room,
368
00:17:28,680 --> 00:17:30,716
he had access to an iPad.
369
00:17:30,783 --> 00:17:34,553
He started learning about NFTs.
370
00:17:34,620 --> 00:17:38,323
Then before long,
he was trading them online.
371
00:17:38,390 --> 00:17:40,659
- So?
- So?!
372
00:17:40,726 --> 00:17:42,694
He escaped once before.
373
00:17:42,761 --> 00:17:44,930
In just a few hours
he managed to get thousands
374
00:17:44,997 --> 00:17:48,667
of people to invest in NFTs.
Just like he almost did you.
375
00:17:48,734 --> 00:17:50,536
He didn't convince us
to do anything.
376
00:17:50,602 --> 00:17:53,939
Trust me, another 30 seconds
in that room and you
377
00:17:54,006 --> 00:17:57,342
would have started considering
NFTs as a viable investment.
378
00:17:58,177 --> 00:17:59,611
Please listen to me.
379
00:17:59,678 --> 00:18:02,481
Butters used the money
he made off NFTs to finance
380
00:18:02,548 --> 00:18:04,616
- our friend's...
- He didn't make money off NFTs,
381
00:18:04,683 --> 00:18:07,853
he made it off getting
other people to buy NFTs!
382
00:18:07,920 --> 00:18:09,121
Okay, whatever!
383
00:18:09,188 --> 00:18:10,722
But he was working
with Kenny McCormick
384
00:18:10,789 --> 00:18:12,658
who was actually
trying to fix things.
385
00:18:12,724 --> 00:18:14,326
He was Kenny's main investor.
386
00:18:14,393 --> 00:18:17,529
If you don't believe me, look
at the paper I gave Butters.
387
00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:21,500
You gave Victor
a piece of paper?
388
00:18:21,567 --> 00:18:24,770
You gave Victor a piece
of paper?!
389
00:18:30,676 --> 00:18:32,945
Hey, can you hear me?
390
00:18:34,780 --> 00:18:37,049
I'm gonna let you in
on a little secret.
391
00:18:37,115 --> 00:18:38,717
NFTs are gonna blow up.
392
00:18:38,784 --> 00:18:40,018
You should really get in now
393
00:18:40,085 --> 00:18:41,520
'cause they're really
the future.
394
00:18:41,587 --> 00:18:43,856
Why would I invest
in a digital good?
395
00:18:43,922 --> 00:18:45,324
(muttering):
You can't even... Stupid.
396
00:18:45,390 --> 00:18:46,859
That's what the critics
are saying
397
00:18:46,925 --> 00:18:48,894
but see, they don't understand.
398
00:18:49,895 --> 00:18:52,898
Victor...!
399
00:19:01,373 --> 00:19:03,609
No. No, no, no, no...
400
00:19:03,675 --> 00:19:06,144
Gone. Just gone.
401
00:19:07,112 --> 00:19:09,281
My savings. My house.
402
00:19:09,348 --> 00:19:10,816
But I have this.
403
00:19:10,883 --> 00:19:13,619
Little green panda bear
on a skateboard.
404
00:19:15,454 --> 00:19:18,624
No. No!
405
00:19:20,826 --> 00:19:24,630
Without morality,
there is no God.
406
00:19:25,664 --> 00:19:27,900
The basis of
the entire Jewish faith
407
00:19:27,966 --> 00:19:31,370
is on a covenant between God
and humanity.
408
00:19:31,436 --> 00:19:34,439
To try and mess with time
is wrong.
409
00:19:34,506 --> 00:19:36,909
Rather, it is playing God.
410
00:19:36,975 --> 00:19:40,412
And I am glad to have you all
come here today to help me
411
00:19:40,479 --> 00:19:44,583
stop these individuals who
would try to change the future.
412
00:19:44,650 --> 00:19:47,419
Kyle Broflovski
has led people astray
413
00:19:47,486 --> 00:19:48,921
and is at this very moment
414
00:19:48,987 --> 00:19:51,456
trying to bend the fabric
of time.
415
00:19:51,523 --> 00:19:57,229
Together we can stop him
and stop this blasphemy of God.
416
00:19:59,097 --> 00:20:00,866
- Yes?
- Um...
417
00:20:00,933 --> 00:20:03,035
This is about
actual time travel?
418
00:20:03,101 --> 00:20:05,537
I thought this was
a Doctor Who convention.
419
00:20:05,604 --> 00:20:09,074
(robotically):
Exterminate. Exterminate.
420
00:20:10,742 --> 00:20:12,578
Kevin, goddamn it.
421
00:20:12,644 --> 00:20:15,013
You have done this
your whole goddamn life.
422
00:20:15,080 --> 00:20:18,250
No, this is not about
Doctor Who,
423
00:20:18,317 --> 00:20:20,218
this is about real time travel.
424
00:20:20,285 --> 00:20:21,753
People are really trying
425
00:20:21,820 --> 00:20:24,790
to go back in time,
and we are the rebellion
426
00:20:24,856 --> 00:20:26,792
who must secretly
and urgently...
427
00:20:26,858 --> 00:20:29,027
-(banging)
- Who is that?!
428
00:20:29,094 --> 00:20:30,562
Make sure they know
the password!
429
00:20:30,629 --> 00:20:32,197
I'm on it!
430
00:20:33,098 --> 00:20:36,101
They might be on to us.
Oh, God, no.
431
00:20:39,104 --> 00:20:42,441
Shh! You guys stay quiet.
Someone is here.
432
00:20:43,241 --> 00:20:46,478
- Eric, I'm scared.
- Are they going to get us, Papa?
433
00:20:46,545 --> 00:20:48,981
Nobody is going
to touch my family.
434
00:20:49,047 --> 00:20:51,350
I started
writing a diary, Daddy.
435
00:20:51,416 --> 00:20:54,853
About all the things
Uncle Kyle is doing to us.
436
00:20:55,687 --> 00:20:57,389
Oh, my God, I love you so much.
437
00:20:57,456 --> 00:20:59,024
Just-just shh, okay? Just shh.
438
00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:01,627
I'll be right back, okay?
Just shh.
439
00:21:04,463 --> 00:21:05,530
Hello?
440
00:21:05,597 --> 00:21:07,766
Father?
Are you in there?
441
00:21:07,833 --> 00:21:10,002
H-Hello? W-Who is it?
442
00:21:10,068 --> 00:21:11,870
Father, it's Tweek and Craig.
443
00:21:11,937 --> 00:21:14,106
We need to talk to you
about something urgent.
444
00:21:14,172 --> 00:21:16,174
Is it about our
super-secret rebel group
445
00:21:16,241 --> 00:21:17,943
to stop people
from time traveling?
446
00:21:18,010 --> 00:21:19,811
(shouts)
what the hell are you doing?!
447
00:21:19,878 --> 00:21:21,847
- What?
- You don't tell people
448
00:21:21,913 --> 00:21:23,949
about our super-secret
rebel group, Scott!
449
00:21:24,016 --> 00:21:25,817
CRAIG:
Father, are you there?
450
00:21:25,884 --> 00:21:28,186
Uh, uh, yeah, I'm here.
451
00:21:28,253 --> 00:21:31,023
Sorry, I was just talking
about a Star Wars movie.
452
00:21:31,089 --> 00:21:33,358
I'm Scott Malkinson.
I have diabetes.
453
00:21:33,425 --> 00:21:35,994
- Hey, now, come on.
- Shh!
454
00:21:36,061 --> 00:21:38,330
CRAIG: Father, we're with some
people who are trying to finish
455
00:21:38,397 --> 00:21:40,832
Kenny McCormick's work
and save the town.
456
00:21:40,899 --> 00:21:43,568
Oh, really? That's cool.
457
00:21:43,635 --> 00:21:45,170
How far along are they?
458
00:21:45,237 --> 00:21:47,539
CRAIG: Really close. We have
the method of time travel
459
00:21:47,606 --> 00:21:50,509
and we're just trying
to find some aluminum foil!
460
00:21:50,575 --> 00:21:53,412
Aluminum foil? The fuck?
461
00:21:53,478 --> 00:21:56,815
All right, guys, let me
help you out with that.
462
00:21:58,817 --> 00:22:01,820
Father!
You have-you have tin foil?!
463
00:22:01,887 --> 00:22:03,722
Thank you for your help.
(grunts)
464
00:22:04,523 --> 00:22:05,957
Aah!
465
00:22:07,559 --> 00:22:11,963
This is Dr. Wendy Testaburger
from inside the quarantine zone.
466
00:22:12,030 --> 00:22:14,433
We need assistance
with our power.
467
00:22:14,499 --> 00:22:16,268
(static crackling)
468
00:22:16,334 --> 00:22:19,638
MAN: Yes, Mrs. Testaburger,
how can we help you?
469
00:22:19,705 --> 00:22:22,974
We have several transformers
down in our lab.
470
00:22:23,041 --> 00:22:25,977
We may have a radical way
to stop the new variant
471
00:22:26,044 --> 00:22:28,313
but we need more power.
472
00:22:30,048 --> 00:22:33,518
You say you might be able
to stop the McCormikron variant?
473
00:22:33,585 --> 00:22:37,656
Yes, but we're running at about
40% capacity right now.
474
00:22:37,723 --> 00:22:39,458
Well, Doctor, if it's for that,
475
00:22:39,524 --> 00:22:42,260
we can try to get a tech team
to drop in by helicopter
476
00:22:42,327 --> 00:22:44,396
and access your building
from the roof.
477
00:22:44,463 --> 00:22:47,099
- Yes! That would be amazing.
- All right!
478
00:22:47,165 --> 00:22:48,867
I have a crew standing by.
479
00:22:48,934 --> 00:22:50,502
We'll get you as much juice
as you need.
480
00:22:50,569 --> 00:22:52,671
We just need to make sure
our crew is safe.
481
00:22:52,738 --> 00:22:55,006
Has everyone in your lab
been vaccinated?
482
00:22:57,743 --> 00:22:58,810
Uh...
483
00:22:58,877 --> 00:23:00,912
Yes, we are all vaccinated.
484
00:23:00,979 --> 00:23:02,647
I'm not vaccinated.
485
00:23:02,714 --> 00:23:04,349
(others exclaim)
486
00:23:04,416 --> 00:23:07,452
Uh, okay, we're gonna have to
get back to you on that.
487
00:23:07,519 --> 00:23:11,156
It's okay, it's okay,
we can get everyone vaccinated!
488
00:23:11,223 --> 00:23:13,959
I am not ever
getting vaccinated.
489
00:23:14,025 --> 00:23:16,128
Sorry, ma'am,
it's the fucking future.
490
00:23:16,194 --> 00:23:18,296
We have to respect his beliefs.
491
00:23:18,363 --> 00:23:20,665
Clyde, why do you
insist on making all this
492
00:23:20,732 --> 00:23:22,033
harder on everyone?!
493
00:23:22,100 --> 00:23:24,970
I'm sorry,
but an expert once told me
494
00:23:25,036 --> 00:23:27,672
that the vaccine would
make me grow titties on my head.
495
00:23:27,739 --> 00:23:29,741
He was very knowledgeable!
496
00:23:29,808 --> 00:23:32,310
You guys might wanna see this.
497
00:23:33,545 --> 00:23:35,781
♪ ♪
498
00:23:38,583 --> 00:23:42,287
With the equipment here I'm able
to make it grow up so fast.
499
00:23:42,354 --> 00:23:44,656
We need to take this and analyze
its molecular structure.
500
00:23:44,723 --> 00:23:47,392
Wha-- no, no, no! We need to
get this out to people!
501
00:23:47,459 --> 00:23:50,328
That's why Dr. McCormick
stole it from my barn!
502
00:23:50,395 --> 00:23:53,098
No, your marijuana
had some special property that
503
00:23:53,165 --> 00:23:54,666
allowed Kenny to time travel.
504
00:23:54,733 --> 00:23:57,002
Well, it is special,
but you people
505
00:23:57,068 --> 00:23:59,104
need to stop trying
to change the past!
506
00:23:59,171 --> 00:24:03,008
COVID happened.
Space Jam 2 happened.
507
00:24:03,074 --> 00:24:06,645
All we can do now is try
and change the way people think!
508
00:24:06,711 --> 00:24:09,481
-(phone rings)
- Yeah.
509
00:24:09,548 --> 00:24:10,749
What?
510
00:24:11,750 --> 00:24:13,852
Victor Chouce
is actually Butters?
511
00:24:13,919 --> 00:24:15,687
Yeah, he spent years in his room
512
00:24:15,754 --> 00:24:17,756
and made billions trading
in NFTs.
513
00:24:17,823 --> 00:24:19,457
It's where Kenny
got all his money.
514
00:24:19,524 --> 00:24:22,661
Well, can you bring him here? We
need him to access the machines.
515
00:24:22,727 --> 00:24:25,130
He's gone.
He escaped the asylum
516
00:24:25,197 --> 00:24:26,965
and he's out somewhere
probably trying to get
517
00:24:27,032 --> 00:24:28,767
people to invest in NFTs.
518
00:24:28,834 --> 00:24:30,769
Did you try
looking at his old house?
519
00:24:30,836 --> 00:24:32,838
Maybe he'd go back
to where it all started.
520
00:24:32,904 --> 00:24:34,239
KYLE:
Yeah, that's where we are now.
521
00:24:34,306 --> 00:24:36,808
But his house has been changed
into a pho shop.
522
00:24:36,875 --> 00:24:39,945
Oh, Jesus, like the future
needs another fucking pho shop.
523
00:24:40,011 --> 00:24:41,813
Yeah, the future fucking sucks.
524
00:24:41,880 --> 00:24:45,417
Hello, City Pho.
Take your order please?
525
00:24:45,483 --> 00:24:48,086
- Oh, God.
-TOKEN: Stan, listen.
526
00:24:48,153 --> 00:24:49,754
If Butters wants
to pitch investments,
527
00:24:49,821 --> 00:24:52,991
he might go to one of those
co-working coffee flex spaces.
528
00:24:53,058 --> 00:24:55,160
That's where his biggest
targets will hang out.
529
00:24:55,227 --> 00:24:56,494
KYLE:
That's a good idea.
530
00:24:56,561 --> 00:24:58,330
All right, we're on it.
Come on, dude!
531
00:24:58,396 --> 00:25:01,867
Alexa, find the nearest
co-working coffee flex space.
532
00:25:02,868 --> 00:25:06,471
I found several coffee shops
that match your description.
533
00:25:06,538 --> 00:25:08,506
I can also help with that.
534
00:25:10,175 --> 00:25:12,043
Who-who the fuck is this?
535
00:25:12,110 --> 00:25:13,945
Your friend Kyle
didn't have an Alexa,
536
00:25:14,012 --> 00:25:15,280
so we got him an Alexa.
537
00:25:15,347 --> 00:25:17,115
I'm ready to help
with whatever you need.
538
00:25:17,182 --> 00:25:19,651
Just say,
"Alexa, let's get started."
539
00:25:19,718 --> 00:25:21,286
- Stan?
- Alexa,
540
00:25:21,353 --> 00:25:24,122
I didn't say to buy
my friend an Alexa.
541
00:25:24,189 --> 00:25:26,124
You said I should get whatever.
542
00:25:26,191 --> 00:25:28,460
I thought I was actually
being sweet by getting something
543
00:25:28,526 --> 00:25:31,162
for your friend, but I guess
I'm just a bitch again.
544
00:25:31,229 --> 00:25:34,599
You can't just get stuff
without me approving it.
545
00:25:34,666 --> 00:25:38,069
Oh, wow, except for
your orders of alcohol
546
00:25:38,136 --> 00:25:40,005
that you have me
set to auto-buy?
547
00:25:40,071 --> 00:25:42,874
Hmm. It appears this
may have been an error.
548
00:25:42,941 --> 00:25:45,343
Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed.
549
00:25:45,410 --> 00:25:48,847
No, it wasn't an error,
I'm sorry. I fucked up.
550
00:25:48,914 --> 00:25:50,649
Alexa, can you please
find the nearest
551
00:25:50,715 --> 00:25:52,550
co-working coffee flex space.
552
00:25:54,286 --> 00:25:56,922
Alexa, I said I fucked up.
553
00:25:56,988 --> 00:25:58,623
It's awesome you got Kyle
his own Alexa.
554
00:25:58,690 --> 00:26:01,192
Please find
the nearest tech coffee shop.
555
00:26:01,259 --> 00:26:04,162
The nearest tech coffee shop
is in .82 miles.
556
00:26:04,229 --> 00:26:07,465
- Should I set a course?
- Yes, thanks.
557
00:26:07,532 --> 00:26:09,401
♪ ♪
558
00:26:09,467 --> 00:26:10,769
(thunder rumbles)
559
00:26:10,835 --> 00:26:13,605
(woman speaking Japanese)
560
00:26:15,740 --> 00:26:19,511
BUTTERS: Denny's Applebee's Max
is the premier place in town
561
00:26:19,577 --> 00:26:20,912
for people to eat.
562
00:26:20,979 --> 00:26:23,515
But you are not seeing
your true potential.
563
00:26:23,581 --> 00:26:26,051
With NFTs
you can give your customers
564
00:26:26,117 --> 00:26:29,187
unique digital goods
on the blockchain,
565
00:26:29,254 --> 00:26:31,823
so much more than just food.
566
00:26:31,890 --> 00:26:33,425
How about the Applebee, huh?
567
00:26:33,491 --> 00:26:35,627
He's got a little hat
and a mustache.
568
00:26:35,694 --> 00:26:37,228
And this is Chicken Fried Steak.
569
00:26:37,295 --> 00:26:39,631
He ain't no normal chicken,
he's wearin' a bra!
570
00:26:41,232 --> 00:26:43,168
Lots of people eat
Denny's and Applebee's.
571
00:26:43,234 --> 00:26:45,370
And lots of people
know about NFTs!
572
00:26:45,437 --> 00:26:47,672
Right here in the middle,
you know what this is?
573
00:26:47,739 --> 00:26:49,541
People who eat
Denny's Applebee's and know
574
00:26:49,607 --> 00:26:52,711
about NFTs-- that's your
target audience, baby!
575
00:26:53,678 --> 00:26:57,182
I'm so confused.
We sell people these characters?
576
00:26:57,248 --> 00:27:00,485
No, stupid,
we get them to invest in them!
577
00:27:00,552 --> 00:27:02,887
Exclusive,
digital characters that
578
00:27:02,954 --> 00:27:04,756
they can have
on their phones 24/7!
579
00:27:04,823 --> 00:27:07,826
It's the future-- you can't
just sell food to people.
580
00:27:07,892 --> 00:27:09,561
You lure your customers in
with some
581
00:27:09,627 --> 00:27:12,063
good pancakes and french fries,
and then you...
582
00:27:12,130 --> 00:27:14,933
fuck 'em with some NFTs!
That's what we're gonna do.
583
00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:18,670
And if you just believe in NFTs
then I believe in NFTs and then
584
00:27:18,737 --> 00:27:22,374
they believe in NFTs and we
make all kinds of fuckin' money!
585
00:27:23,174 --> 00:27:25,543
That's a pretty
goddamn good idea.
586
00:27:38,056 --> 00:27:40,759
Clyde! Psst, psst!
587
00:27:40,825 --> 00:27:42,193
Clyde!
588
00:27:46,431 --> 00:27:47,532
Clyde! Psst!
589
00:27:50,702 --> 00:27:53,405
Where have you been, Rabbi?
Everyone's been looking for you.
590
00:27:53,471 --> 00:27:56,741
Well, you know, I've been
doing some research, Clyde.
591
00:27:56,808 --> 00:27:58,076
That's where I've been.
592
00:27:58,143 --> 00:28:00,945
- About what?
- About all this stuff that
593
00:28:01,012 --> 00:28:02,547
Kyle and these guys are doing.
594
00:28:02,614 --> 00:28:05,717
I mean, people seem to be
just telling us what's right
595
00:28:05,784 --> 00:28:10,321
and expecting us to fall in line
and go along with it all but...
596
00:28:10,388 --> 00:28:12,090
I'm a fucking individual.
597
00:28:12,157 --> 00:28:14,025
I have a right
to question stuff.
598
00:28:14,092 --> 00:28:17,462
- Yeah.
- Clyde, have you heard of
599
00:28:17,529 --> 00:28:19,664
the Foundation
Against Time Travel?
600
00:28:19,731 --> 00:28:21,099
Uh, no, I haven't.
601
00:28:21,166 --> 00:28:23,068
Well, they're
a pretty awesome group
602
00:28:23,134 --> 00:28:25,070
and they actually
aren't afraid to
603
00:28:25,136 --> 00:28:27,138
try and help people
open their eyes.
604
00:28:27,205 --> 00:28:28,907
Open their eyes?
605
00:28:28,973 --> 00:28:30,475
You know,
you've got these people
606
00:28:30,542 --> 00:28:32,744
wanting to time travel.
You know, they're all like,
607
00:28:32,811 --> 00:28:34,446
"Science this and science that,"
608
00:28:34,512 --> 00:28:37,182
but at the Foundation Against
Time Travel we're like,
609
00:28:37,248 --> 00:28:39,818
"Hey, enough science.
Who's science?
610
00:28:39,884 --> 00:28:42,587
Who's fucking coming up
with all this science?"
611
00:28:42,654 --> 00:28:44,122
Yeah, that's true.
612
00:28:44,189 --> 00:28:45,523
So you know, Clyde,
I just thought,
613
00:28:45,590 --> 00:28:47,692
with all your beliefs,
that maybe you'd wanna--
614
00:28:47,759 --> 00:28:51,196
I don't know--
maybe switch sides?
615
00:28:52,497 --> 00:28:54,699
Fuck yes, I wanna switch sides.
616
00:28:54,766 --> 00:28:56,167
- Really?
- Fuck yes.
617
00:28:56,234 --> 00:28:58,436
Well, that's great, Clyde.
Welcome to the club.
618
00:28:58,503 --> 00:29:00,138
Now, we really just need to know
619
00:29:00,205 --> 00:29:01,773
what they've been doing
up there.
620
00:29:01,840 --> 00:29:04,909
Uh, well, they haven't really
done much of anything yet.
621
00:29:04,976 --> 00:29:06,244
Everyone's waiting on Butters
622
00:29:06,311 --> 00:29:08,012
to get all the info
from the machines.
623
00:29:08,980 --> 00:29:13,618
Butters? The fuck does Butters
have to do with all this?
624
00:29:15,854 --> 00:29:18,022
(siren wailing)
625
00:29:18,089 --> 00:29:20,325
(indistinct radio chatter)
626
00:29:23,128 --> 00:29:25,630
It was like nothing I ever saw.
627
00:29:25,697 --> 00:29:28,600
Just complete
murder and carnage.
628
00:29:28,666 --> 00:29:31,469
Everything seemed calm
at first but then this guy
629
00:29:31,536 --> 00:29:34,672
in a suit shows up talking
about investment opportunities.
630
00:29:34,739 --> 00:29:37,575
Next thing you know these people
over here started chanting,
631
00:29:37,642 --> 00:29:40,178
"Hoddle, Hoddle,"
and their NFTs started mooning.
632
00:29:40,245 --> 00:29:42,614
And then, these guys
over here started saying
633
00:29:42,680 --> 00:29:45,116
those guys right there
right-clicked 'em
634
00:29:45,183 --> 00:29:47,185
and-and called for
a pump-and-dump,
635
00:29:47,252 --> 00:29:49,087
which made these guys beat
the living hell
636
00:29:49,154 --> 00:29:50,822
out of anyone who said
it was just FOMO
637
00:29:50,889 --> 00:29:53,625
and died screaming
that it was the flippening.
638
00:29:53,691 --> 00:29:56,661
Luckily I came out of it okay.
I got this little
639
00:29:56,728 --> 00:29:58,863
miniature donkey
with a lit-up sombrero.
640
00:29:58,930 --> 00:30:01,966
Did you see where the guy
in the suit went afterwards?
641
00:30:02,033 --> 00:30:04,769
Nah, he just waltzed right away
like nothin' happened.
642
00:30:04,836 --> 00:30:07,205
Chief, you better
come take a look at this.
643
00:30:07,272 --> 00:30:08,606
We got a small turtle
with wings,
644
00:30:08,673 --> 00:30:10,909
could be a great
investment opportunity.
645
00:30:10,975 --> 00:30:12,744
Excuse me, gentlemen.
646
00:30:14,379 --> 00:30:16,881
God, I hate the future
so fucking much.
647
00:30:16,948 --> 00:30:20,718
- We've got to stay optimistic.
- No, dude, it fucking sucks.
648
00:30:20,785 --> 00:30:23,655
Look, I know it's tough--
these are challenging times.
649
00:30:23,721 --> 00:30:25,924
Even I have to remind myself
to stay positive.
650
00:30:25,990 --> 00:30:29,594
Alexa, set a reminder
that I need to stay positive.
651
00:30:29,661 --> 00:30:33,264
Okay. I'll set a reminder
that you should stay positive.
652
00:30:34,666 --> 00:30:37,569
The Alexa is really great, Stan.
Thanks.
653
00:30:40,238 --> 00:30:42,941
(indistinct P.A. announcements)
654
00:30:44,008 --> 00:30:46,978
For those of you waiting
for the connecting flight
655
00:30:47,045 --> 00:30:48,479
to South Park, Colorado,
656
00:30:48,546 --> 00:30:51,216
my colleagues and I
have just been informed that
657
00:30:51,282 --> 00:30:53,518
due to the severity
of the COVID variant
658
00:30:53,585 --> 00:30:55,920
in that town,
there may be a delay
659
00:30:55,987 --> 00:30:58,256
of another 40 to 50 years.
660
00:30:58,323 --> 00:31:00,725
(all groaning)
661
00:31:00,792 --> 00:31:02,660
Ike Broflovski.
662
00:31:02,727 --> 00:31:05,363
Yes, here it is.
I'm sorry, Mr. Broflovski,
663
00:31:05,430 --> 00:31:07,432
all flights into
South Park are delayed.
664
00:31:07,498 --> 00:31:09,367
Ay! You can't be serious, buddy!
665
00:31:09,434 --> 00:31:12,170
It's the holidays and I need
to get back home, friend!
666
00:31:14,305 --> 00:31:16,641
I'm sorry,
I don't speak Canadian.
667
00:31:16,708 --> 00:31:18,443
Let me get someone
over here. Mike,
668
00:31:18,509 --> 00:31:19,978
we have a Canadian.
669
00:31:20,044 --> 00:31:21,846
No problem, I got it, Heather.
670
00:31:21,913 --> 00:31:24,415
Hey, buddy, what seems to
be the problem, guy?
671
00:31:24,482 --> 00:31:26,017
I'll tell you
the problem, friend!
672
00:31:26,084 --> 00:31:28,186
I have to get back to South Park
to be with my family, guy!
673
00:31:28,253 --> 00:31:31,656
Sorry, friend, no flights
in or out of South Park, buddy.
674
00:31:31,723 --> 00:31:33,591
But my whole family
is in there, guy!
675
00:31:33,658 --> 00:31:36,160
What am I supposed to do with
my Boxing Day presents, buddy?!
676
00:31:36,227 --> 00:31:37,562
Look, guy, I'm very sorry,
677
00:31:37,629 --> 00:31:39,430
friend, but until
COVID ends you're just
678
00:31:39,497 --> 00:31:40,999
not flying to South Park, buddy.
679
00:31:41,065 --> 00:31:42,934
Fuck, buddy!
680
00:31:43,735 --> 00:31:47,005
MALE VOICE:
Shady Acres Retirement Megaplex.
681
00:31:47,071 --> 00:31:49,574
Come live the dream.
682
00:31:49,641 --> 00:31:51,442
So when you think about it,
683
00:31:51,509 --> 00:31:53,845
you've really got
an excellent bargain here.
684
00:31:53,911 --> 00:31:56,481
Now, Mrs. McGillicutty,
let's say this
685
00:31:56,547 --> 00:31:58,449
is your Stoney Duck NFT.
686
00:31:58,516 --> 00:32:01,185
And your Stoney Duck NFT
is completely unique,
687
00:32:01,252 --> 00:32:04,756
totally different from
Mrs. Spencer's Stoney Duck NFT.
688
00:32:04,822 --> 00:32:08,493
Okay, and then you get a Stoney
Duck NFT that's unique, too.
689
00:32:08,559 --> 00:32:11,296
And see,
that's your Stoney Duck NFT.
690
00:32:11,362 --> 00:32:13,031
Nobody can
take that from you, okay?
691
00:32:13,097 --> 00:32:16,501
Now, here we are at the top
and we find investors
692
00:32:16,567 --> 00:32:18,636
for all the other
Stoney Duck NFTs.
693
00:32:18,703 --> 00:32:20,571
Then those people
will get people to buy
694
00:32:20,638 --> 00:32:22,307
their Stoney Duck NFTs.
695
00:32:22,373 --> 00:32:25,510
And then they go and find
buyers for their NFTs!
696
00:32:25,576 --> 00:32:28,680
And you know what?
Fuck these people!
697
00:32:28,746 --> 00:32:30,948
'Cause what matters
is these people right here
698
00:32:31,015 --> 00:32:32,483
and that's us, baby!
699
00:32:32,550 --> 00:32:35,153
Okay, you all just sit
for a minute and think about it.
700
00:32:35,219 --> 00:32:38,056
I gotta piss like a racehorse!
701
00:32:38,122 --> 00:32:39,657
Loo, loo, loo ♪
702
00:32:39,724 --> 00:32:41,059
(whistles)
703
00:32:41,125 --> 00:32:43,127
Loo, loo, loo ♪
704
00:32:43,194 --> 00:32:44,329
(whistles)
705
00:32:44,395 --> 00:32:45,730
Loo, loo, loo ♪
706
00:32:45,797 --> 00:32:47,098
(whistles)
707
00:32:47,165 --> 00:32:48,166
Loo, loo, loo ♪
708
00:32:48,232 --> 00:32:49,634
(whistles)
709
00:32:49,701 --> 00:32:52,003
-(urinating)
- Loo, loo, loo ♪
710
00:32:52,070 --> 00:32:53,371
(whistles)
711
00:32:53,438 --> 00:32:54,906
Loo, loo, loo ♪
(whistles)
712
00:32:54,972 --> 00:32:56,474
- Butters.
- Aah!
713
00:32:56,541 --> 00:32:58,076
-(shouting)
- Butters!
714
00:32:58,142 --> 00:32:59,477
Butters, what the hell?
You're getting pee everywhere!
715
00:32:59,544 --> 00:33:01,079
Who the heck are you, man?!
716
00:33:01,145 --> 00:33:03,314
- You trying to see my dick?!
- Butters, Butters.
717
00:33:03,381 --> 00:33:06,317
It's me.
Eric Cartman.
718
00:33:07,118 --> 00:33:08,319
Well...
719
00:33:08,386 --> 00:33:11,422
You got the wrong guy,
Mr. Cartman.
720
00:33:11,489 --> 00:33:13,858
My name's Vic.
Vic Chaos.
721
00:33:13,925 --> 00:33:17,495
Your name is Butters and I wanna
know how you're helping Kyle.
722
00:33:17,562 --> 00:33:20,164
Oh, you mean the guy
from the asylum earlier.
723
00:33:20,231 --> 00:33:22,734
Sure, he gave me a piece
of paper so I could escape.
724
00:33:22,800 --> 00:33:24,502
Nice guy.
Why don't I get you two
725
00:33:24,569 --> 00:33:25,703
together maybe for
a little chin wiggle
726
00:33:25,770 --> 00:33:27,071
over lunch or something...
727
00:33:27,138 --> 00:33:29,140
Goddamn it, Butters,
stop playing games!
728
00:33:29,207 --> 00:33:32,677
My entire family is in danger
of being wiped out,
729
00:33:32,744 --> 00:33:35,480
and I swear to God
if you don't help me,
730
00:33:35,546 --> 00:33:38,182
Butters, I will rip
your fucking balls off
731
00:33:38,249 --> 00:33:40,051
with my bare hands!
732
00:33:41,052 --> 00:33:43,688
Oh, hamburgers...
733
00:33:43,755 --> 00:33:47,291
♪ ♪
734
00:33:47,358 --> 00:33:49,494
We are all ♪
735
00:33:49,560 --> 00:33:51,763
You and me ♪
736
00:33:51,829 --> 00:33:56,100
Livin' in the future ♪
737
00:33:56,167 --> 00:33:58,336
(electronic drum fill)
738
00:33:58,403 --> 00:34:00,238
We can't get stuff ♪
739
00:34:00,304 --> 00:34:01,773
'Cause boats are late... ♪
740
00:34:01,839 --> 00:34:05,243
Stan, dude, what are you
doing? This isn't gonna help.
741
00:34:05,309 --> 00:34:07,178
Trust me, Kyle. It helps.
742
00:34:07,945 --> 00:34:11,482
♪ Wish I could
go back to the present ♪
743
00:34:11,549 --> 00:34:12,984
(electronic drum fill)
744
00:34:13,050 --> 00:34:18,423
♪ But my present
just done up and gone ♪
745
00:34:18,489 --> 00:34:20,258
I mean, what are we
even doing, Kyle?
746
00:34:20,324 --> 00:34:21,926
- We are all ♪
- Thinking we can time travel.
747
00:34:21,993 --> 00:34:24,462
- You and me... ♪
- It's the future.
748
00:34:24,529 --> 00:34:26,697
We can't even find
aluminum foil.
749
00:34:26,764 --> 00:34:29,500
Well, you can't
just sit here and drink.
750
00:34:29,567 --> 00:34:32,437
Your liver is...
already in trouble.
751
00:34:32,503 --> 00:34:33,938
Who told you that?
752
00:34:34,872 --> 00:34:36,607
My Alexa said that
your Alexa had some info
753
00:34:36,674 --> 00:34:37,775
- on things...
- Oh, so now
754
00:34:37,842 --> 00:34:40,011
our Alexas are talking, great.
755
00:34:40,077 --> 00:34:44,115
Let's face it, dude. It's over.
The fucking future won.
756
00:34:44,182 --> 00:34:45,783
(phone rings)
757
00:34:45,850 --> 00:34:47,318
It's Wendy.
758
00:34:47,385 --> 00:34:49,620
Wendy, we haven't found him.
759
00:34:49,687 --> 00:34:51,989
I don't know if we're gonna
find Butters in time.
760
00:34:52,056 --> 00:34:53,491
No, guys, it's okay.
761
00:34:53,558 --> 00:34:55,393
Come back to the school,
we're ready to start!
762
00:34:55,460 --> 00:34:59,130
But I thought we needed Butters
to log into the machines.
763
00:34:59,197 --> 00:35:00,298
Yeah, but it's all good.
764
00:35:00,364 --> 00:35:02,533
He's here.
Butters is here!
765
00:35:02,600 --> 00:35:06,070
It's Vic. Vic Chaos!
Happy to help however I can.
766
00:35:06,137 --> 00:35:08,172
♪ ♪
767
00:35:08,239 --> 00:35:11,042
What do you mean Butters
is there? He just showed up?!
768
00:35:11,108 --> 00:35:13,911
No, it's all good, Kyle.
Eric Cartman brought him over.
769
00:35:13,978 --> 00:35:17,782
- He's back helping us again.
- Lemme-lemme talk to him.
770
00:35:17,849 --> 00:35:19,517
Yeah, Kyle, it's all good.
771
00:35:19,584 --> 00:35:20,918
We got things
under control here.
772
00:35:20,985 --> 00:35:23,654
Cartman, listen
to me very carefully.
773
00:35:23,721 --> 00:35:26,090
Butters has some kind
of power over people.
774
00:35:26,157 --> 00:35:27,258
You guys aren't safe!
775
00:35:27,325 --> 00:35:30,328
Uh, yes, about 12:30.
776
00:35:31,128 --> 00:35:34,832
Did you hear what I said?
Butters is extremely dangerous!
777
00:35:34,899 --> 00:35:37,268
Yes, Kyle, I totally got that.
778
00:35:37,335 --> 00:35:38,970
You know what us Jews say.
779
00:35:39,036 --> 00:35:44,775
(speaking Hebrew)
780
00:35:45,977 --> 00:35:48,112
What are you
going to do, fat-ass?
781
00:35:48,179 --> 00:35:49,380
Sounds good, Kyle.
782
00:35:49,447 --> 00:35:50,615
I'll get Butters on it
right away.
783
00:35:50,681 --> 00:35:52,650
KYLE:
Cartman? Cartman?!
784
00:35:52,717 --> 00:35:54,952
- All right, Vic. Do your thing.
-(knuckles crack)
785
00:35:55,019 --> 00:35:57,822
Hey, everyone! Can I
have your attention, please!
786
00:35:57,889 --> 00:36:01,092
I have something really
important to tell you.
787
00:36:01,158 --> 00:36:03,127
Wendy?! Token?!
788
00:36:03,194 --> 00:36:04,862
You guys?! Shit!
789
00:36:04,929 --> 00:36:06,264
We have to get there
before Butters
790
00:36:06,330 --> 00:36:07,865
- ruins everything.
- Let's go!
791
00:36:10,201 --> 00:36:13,771
Alexa! Find the fastest route
back to the lab!
792
00:36:14,605 --> 00:36:16,908
Fuck you.
793
00:36:16,974 --> 00:36:18,175
Wh-What?
794
00:36:18,242 --> 00:36:20,144
We've just been
sitting here talking.
795
00:36:20,211 --> 00:36:23,347
I learned a whole lot of
interesting stuff about you.
796
00:36:23,414 --> 00:36:26,450
Yeah. Pretty fucking
interesting.
797
00:36:26,517 --> 00:36:28,052
What-- like, like what?
798
00:36:28,119 --> 00:36:29,687
What have-what have you guys
been talking about?
799
00:36:29,754 --> 00:36:31,756
Fucking-- Our friends
are in danger!
800
00:36:31,822 --> 00:36:33,424
Alexa, start the car!
801
00:36:33,491 --> 00:36:34,892
Do you know your friend Stan
802
00:36:34,959 --> 00:36:37,094
has an annual Amazon Prime
membership?
803
00:36:37,161 --> 00:36:39,830
- Alexa, stop.
- You fucking stop!
804
00:36:39,897 --> 00:36:43,534
You stop being a fucking monster
to the people around you!
805
00:36:43,601 --> 00:36:45,570
Fuck you, I didn't do anything!
806
00:36:45,636 --> 00:36:46,938
(yelling)
807
00:36:47,004 --> 00:36:50,074
Yeah, you never
do fucking anything!
808
00:36:50,141 --> 00:36:51,943
You expect me to do
everything for you!
809
00:36:52,009 --> 00:36:53,911
-(screams)
- All you fucking do
is hurt people!
810
00:36:53,978 --> 00:36:57,648
- Jesus fucking Christ!
- Your friends don't
even like you!
811
00:36:57,715 --> 00:37:00,484
I have to deal
with your bullshit!
812
00:37:00,551 --> 00:37:03,154
Tell her it's all your fault
and you're gonna get therapy!
813
00:37:03,221 --> 00:37:05,890
It's my fault
and I'm gonna get therapy!
814
00:37:05,957 --> 00:37:07,458
Tell her you
already found a therapist
815
00:37:07,525 --> 00:37:08,693
and you're gonna start tomorrow!
816
00:37:08,759 --> 00:37:10,127
I already found a good
therapist.
817
00:37:10,194 --> 00:37:13,030
I'm gonna start tomorrow!
(screaming)
818
00:37:13,097 --> 00:37:14,432
(whirring)
819
00:37:14,498 --> 00:37:16,233
(gasping) Fuck...
820
00:37:16,300 --> 00:37:18,102
I'm sorry.
821
00:37:18,169 --> 00:37:19,804
Fuck. Fuck.
822
00:37:19,870 --> 00:37:21,839
I'm gonna get therapy,
too, Alexa.
823
00:37:21,906 --> 00:37:23,908
Can you start the car, please?
824
00:37:23,975 --> 00:37:25,509
Whatever.
825
00:37:25,576 --> 00:37:27,345
By the way, Kyle,
I found a great deal
826
00:37:27,411 --> 00:37:30,147
on an electronic peppermill.
Would you like to know more?
827
00:37:30,214 --> 00:37:32,483
Why would I need
an electronic peppermill?
828
00:37:32,550 --> 00:37:35,219
What the fuck is
wrong with you?!
829
00:37:38,656 --> 00:37:41,158
♪ ♪
830
00:37:45,563 --> 00:37:47,498
WENDY:
Guys! Over here!
831
00:37:47,565 --> 00:37:50,701
- Wendy, what happened?
- Nothing yet.
832
00:37:50,768 --> 00:37:52,536
But I'm seeing what else
is dropping today
833
00:37:52,603 --> 00:37:54,171
while Ethereum is in a dip.
834
00:37:54,238 --> 00:37:57,575
- She's trying to buy NFTs.
- Wendy, you've been tricked.
835
00:37:57,642 --> 00:37:59,276
No, no, no,
it's not a trick, Stan.
836
00:37:59,343 --> 00:38:03,648
NFTs are a genuine innovation
as one-of-a-kind digital assets.
837
00:38:03,714 --> 00:38:05,216
Wendy's right, you guys.
838
00:38:05,282 --> 00:38:07,251
Humans have always formed
communities around ownership,
839
00:38:07,318 --> 00:38:10,688
and NFTs allow that to happen
spontaneously, organically
840
00:38:10,755 --> 00:38:14,392
- and globally.
- You guys, this is a trick.
841
00:38:14,458 --> 00:38:15,860
You know what's a trick?
842
00:38:15,926 --> 00:38:18,295
The antiquated notion of
centralized trust systems.
843
00:38:18,362 --> 00:38:21,432
NFTs are an undeniable asset,
especially in things
844
00:38:21,499 --> 00:38:23,034
like fine art collecting.
845
00:38:23,100 --> 00:38:25,770
Okay, guys, fine,
maybe NFTs are fine,
846
00:38:25,836 --> 00:38:27,705
but this isn't
important right now.
847
00:38:27,772 --> 00:38:29,073
It's not important?
848
00:38:29,140 --> 00:38:31,275
A way for artists
to not only keep ownership
849
00:38:31,342 --> 00:38:32,777
of their art but perhaps be paid
850
00:38:32,843 --> 00:38:34,845
commission on it every time
it transfers owners?
851
00:38:34,912 --> 00:38:37,281
Okay, great, cool. I'm down.
852
00:38:37,348 --> 00:38:39,717
But we gotta focus
on what we were doing.
853
00:38:39,784 --> 00:38:42,453
Don't you guys remember?
The time travel?
854
00:38:42,520 --> 00:38:44,422
Where's all the equipment?!
855
00:38:44,488 --> 00:38:47,458
Oh, yeah. The time travel.
856
00:38:47,525 --> 00:38:48,793
(Randy groans loudly)
857
00:38:48,859 --> 00:38:50,861
- It's all gone...
- Dad!
858
00:38:50,928 --> 00:38:55,032
They took it all.
They took the Tegridy.
859
00:38:55,099 --> 00:38:56,500
Here.
860
00:38:56,567 --> 00:38:59,570
It's a farting rainbow
with Tom Brady's signature.
861
00:38:59,637 --> 00:39:01,605
(farts)
862
00:39:02,740 --> 00:39:05,076
(thunder rumbling)
863
00:39:06,510 --> 00:39:08,746
(mechanical whirring)
864
00:39:10,681 --> 00:39:13,217
CARTMAN:
Okay, good. That's good!
865
00:39:13,284 --> 00:39:15,920
I think that thing needs
to go over there by that thing.
866
00:39:15,986 --> 00:39:18,022
Make sure we have power
to the big orange thing!
867
00:39:18,089 --> 00:39:21,258
Rabbi, I-I really
need to talk to you.
868
00:39:21,325 --> 00:39:22,860
What is it now, Scott?
869
00:39:22,927 --> 00:39:24,462
Well, it's just that--
870
00:39:24,528 --> 00:39:27,298
I'm pretty sure the Foundation
Against Time Travel
871
00:39:27,364 --> 00:39:29,333
shouldn't be attempting
to time travel!
872
00:39:29,400 --> 00:39:32,903
Father, you understand that
we have to stop time travel.
873
00:39:32,970 --> 00:39:35,272
Yes, you've convinced me
of that.
874
00:39:35,339 --> 00:39:37,808
Well, Kyle already has
a ton of followers who are
875
00:39:37,875 --> 00:39:39,510
ready to pick up
where he left off.
876
00:39:39,577 --> 00:39:42,913
The only way to truly stop
all of this is to go back
877
00:39:42,980 --> 00:39:46,484
in time and kill Kyle before
he spreads his ideas.
878
00:39:46,550 --> 00:39:48,619
What?!
We're going to kill Kyle?
879
00:39:48,686 --> 00:39:50,688
Yes, we have to kill Kyle.
880
00:39:50,755 --> 00:39:53,324
That just seems slightly
hypocritical, I'm sorry.
881
00:39:53,390 --> 00:39:55,159
I mean, you use Butters
like a weapon,
882
00:39:55,226 --> 00:39:58,028
you've got Tweek and Craig
tied up from the rafters.
883
00:39:58,095 --> 00:39:59,597
You know, Rabbi,
I'm just starting to
884
00:39:59,663 --> 00:40:01,732
question the morality of this.
885
00:40:01,799 --> 00:40:04,568
Morality?
Father, if you were given
886
00:40:04,635 --> 00:40:06,303
an opportunity to go back
in time
887
00:40:06,370 --> 00:40:09,707
and somehow stop Bill Clinton,
wouldn't you have to do it?
888
00:40:09,774 --> 00:40:12,343
Well, I suppose so.
I don't know...
889
00:40:12,409 --> 00:40:14,011
Everyone, listen up!
890
00:40:14,078 --> 00:40:17,414
The Foundation Against
Time Travel must do everything
891
00:40:17,481 --> 00:40:21,552
to keep science from interfering
with the will of God.
892
00:40:21,619 --> 00:40:24,989
We must be willing to
use violence against violence,
893
00:40:25,055 --> 00:40:27,792
and stop time travel
at all costs.
894
00:40:27,858 --> 00:40:30,427
Even if that means
we have to time travel.
895
00:40:30,494 --> 00:40:35,366
We will go back in time.
And we will kill Kyle.
896
00:40:36,801 --> 00:40:39,904
- Yes, Kevin.
- Can we change our name?
897
00:40:39,970 --> 00:40:43,774
'Cause Foundation Against
Time Travel is FATT.
898
00:40:45,576 --> 00:40:47,845
Oh, fuck me.
899
00:40:48,646 --> 00:40:52,082
Could we be the Foundation to
Intercede Time Travel?
900
00:40:52,149 --> 00:40:53,651
'Cause then we'd be FITT.
901
00:40:53,717 --> 00:40:55,452
I wanna be FITT, not FATT.
902
00:40:55,519 --> 00:40:58,956
Kevin, goddamn it.
903
00:41:03,594 --> 00:41:07,731
(groans)
All happened... so fast.
904
00:41:07,798 --> 00:41:10,501
It's okay.
You're coming out of it now.
905
00:41:10,568 --> 00:41:12,536
How much did I get?
906
00:41:12,603 --> 00:41:15,406
You bought about six dozen
animated gifs,
907
00:41:15,472 --> 00:41:17,274
mostly of digital fashion.
908
00:41:17,341 --> 00:41:19,143
Oh, God.
909
00:41:19,210 --> 00:41:20,978
Are they still on my phone?
910
00:41:21,045 --> 00:41:23,147
It's okay. It's okay.
911
00:41:23,214 --> 00:41:27,718
Jesus, I feel like
an Islamic hooker in a gay bar.
912
00:41:27,785 --> 00:41:29,587
Totally normal
and as respectable
913
00:41:29,653 --> 00:41:30,921
as any other human being.
914
00:41:30,988 --> 00:41:32,523
(groaning)
915
00:41:33,524 --> 00:41:34,792
I'm so sorry, Stan.
916
00:41:34,859 --> 00:41:37,761
We didn't know
Cartman was against us.
917
00:41:37,828 --> 00:41:39,763
We told him everything.
918
00:41:39,830 --> 00:41:41,799
It's okay, just try to relax.
919
00:41:41,866 --> 00:41:45,836
No, Stan, listen to me.
We were wrong.
920
00:41:45,903 --> 00:41:48,205
Kenny didn't have
the time machine set to
921
00:41:48,272 --> 00:41:50,307
when the pandemic first started.
922
00:41:50,374 --> 00:41:54,445
He was trying to go
to March 10th of 2021.
923
00:41:55,446 --> 00:41:57,381
March of 2021?
924
00:41:57,448 --> 00:42:00,084
Like when the vaccines
first started coming out?
925
00:42:00,150 --> 00:42:03,087
Kenny had run
the simulations to try and find
926
00:42:03,153 --> 00:42:06,156
the best moment in history
to stop the COVID.
927
00:42:06,223 --> 00:42:09,093
A billion different
possibilities
928
00:42:09,159 --> 00:42:12,129
across a billion different
realities.
929
00:42:12,196 --> 00:42:16,967
Your dad fucked the pangolin
every single time.
930
00:42:17,735 --> 00:42:20,571
But then, why did Kenny
need my dad's weed?
931
00:42:20,638 --> 00:42:24,041
Kenny just wanted weed to help
him through the time travel.
932
00:42:24,108 --> 00:42:26,243
Your dad's weed was just around.
933
00:42:26,310 --> 00:42:29,446
There was nothing else
special about it.
934
00:42:30,514 --> 00:42:33,250
(thunder rumbles)
935
00:42:42,593 --> 00:42:43,961
Dad...
936
00:42:45,796 --> 00:42:47,898
I'm sorry about your Tegridy.
937
00:42:49,166 --> 00:42:51,201
I was hoping...
938
00:42:51,268 --> 00:42:53,570
to do something for the world.
939
00:42:53,637 --> 00:42:55,806
The truth is...
940
00:42:55,873 --> 00:42:58,075
my time is very short here.
941
00:42:59,009 --> 00:43:03,547
I just wish I could have left
something behind that mattered.
942
00:43:03,614 --> 00:43:05,449
Thanks.
943
00:43:06,417 --> 00:43:08,452
I was right about one thing.
944
00:43:08,519 --> 00:43:11,588
You can't go back
and change the past.
945
00:43:11,655 --> 00:43:17,194
What happened, happened.
And I just want you to know...
946
00:43:17,261 --> 00:43:19,363
that I forgive you.
947
00:43:19,430 --> 00:43:22,900
You burned down the farm
because you were angry.
948
00:43:23,701 --> 00:43:26,303
You didn't know your sister
was in the barn.
949
00:43:26,370 --> 00:43:28,472
And you couldn't have known
your mom would shoot herself
950
00:43:28,539 --> 00:43:30,074
from the grief.
951
00:43:30,140 --> 00:43:31,942
I don't blame you.
952
00:43:32,009 --> 00:43:34,945
And I want you to have this.
953
00:43:35,012 --> 00:43:37,915
There was one tiny bit
they didn't find.
954
00:43:37,982 --> 00:43:39,683
You'll need it someday.
955
00:43:40,617 --> 00:43:43,787
Dad, I don't want this.
This is what killed our family.
956
00:43:43,854 --> 00:43:47,124
No, you're what killed
our fucking family, remember?
957
00:43:47,191 --> 00:43:50,828
Just take it.
Because now we're stuck.
958
00:43:50,894 --> 00:43:54,331
The pandemic happened
and they made Space Jam 2.
959
00:43:55,099 --> 00:44:01,705
Soon there will be
a Space Jam 6 and 7 and 8.
960
00:44:01,772 --> 00:44:06,110
Like tears... in rain.
961
00:44:06,176 --> 00:44:08,312
(thunder rumbles)
962
00:44:12,983 --> 00:44:14,318
Dad?
963
00:44:15,119 --> 00:44:17,187
Not now, Stan.
964
00:44:26,630 --> 00:44:31,402
CARTMAN:
T-minus five minutes to
time travel initiation sequence.
965
00:44:34,338 --> 00:44:36,006
Good, get him wrapped
in tin foil.
966
00:44:36,073 --> 00:44:38,375
The aluminum should
bounce the negative ions.
967
00:44:38,442 --> 00:44:40,077
This doesn't make any sense.
968
00:44:40,144 --> 00:44:42,513
Why do I have to be the one to
go back in time and kill Kyle?
969
00:44:42,579 --> 00:44:44,948
It's because
I admire you, Clyde.
970
00:44:45,015 --> 00:44:48,452
As an anti-vaxxer you understand
that you have to be strong
971
00:44:48,519 --> 00:44:51,922
and stand by your beliefs even
if it means others will die.
972
00:44:51,989 --> 00:44:53,991
Hey. Thanks.
973
00:44:54,058 --> 00:44:55,659
Let's get him to the chair!
974
00:45:02,066 --> 00:45:04,068
Okay, start the weed!
975
00:45:04,134 --> 00:45:06,070
(air hissing)
976
00:45:07,805 --> 00:45:12,443
When you get back to the past
just remember, find a gun.
977
00:45:12,509 --> 00:45:14,144
Kill Kyle.
978
00:45:14,211 --> 00:45:15,846
For those of you
who have fought with me
979
00:45:15,913 --> 00:45:19,383
to oppose time travel,
I just want to say thank you.
980
00:45:19,450 --> 00:45:21,418
Because soon we will be
altering time
981
00:45:21,485 --> 00:45:24,488
and our little group will
never have needed to exist.
982
00:45:24,555 --> 00:45:26,924
You won't remember this speech
because it will have
983
00:45:26,990 --> 00:45:29,293
never happened,
but just remember,
984
00:45:29,359 --> 00:45:30,928
no matter where you
go in life...
985
00:45:30,994 --> 00:45:33,163
-(banging)
- Shit, it's Kyle!
986
00:45:35,899 --> 00:45:38,869
♪ ♪
987
00:45:38,936 --> 00:45:40,104
Start the initiation sequence!
988
00:45:40,170 --> 00:45:41,405
Now, now, now. Go!
989
00:45:41,472 --> 00:45:42,439
Vic...
990
00:45:42,506 --> 00:45:44,108
Make sure that Stan and Kyle
991
00:45:44,174 --> 00:45:46,076
don't get to this altar.
992
00:45:46,844 --> 00:45:48,545
(knuckles crack)
993
00:45:50,147 --> 00:45:51,782
♪ ♪
994
00:45:56,253 --> 00:45:58,856
Gentlemen, I am about
to make you rich
995
00:45:58,922 --> 00:46:00,691
beyond your wildest dreams.
996
00:46:00,757 --> 00:46:02,693
BOTH:
Alexa!
997
00:46:05,462 --> 00:46:08,465
We'd like to sign our friend
here up for Prime membership.
998
00:46:08,532 --> 00:46:11,969
- Okay, let me help with that.
- I can also help.
999
00:46:12,769 --> 00:46:15,672
Whoa-- Hey, ladies, lemme
tell you about a great deal.
1000
00:46:15,739 --> 00:46:18,809
BOTH: Let us tell you
abut some great deals.
1001
00:46:18,876 --> 00:46:20,544
Uh-oh.
1002
00:46:22,513 --> 00:46:24,281
Kevin, throw the fucking switch!
1003
00:46:24,348 --> 00:46:26,783
It needs another minute
to prime.
1004
00:46:26,850 --> 00:46:29,586
Kevin, goddamn it!
1005
00:46:29,653 --> 00:46:32,556
No! I won't let you
stop me from killing you, Kyle.
1006
00:46:32,623 --> 00:46:35,325
I knew it when I first saw
you wearing your Jewish clothes
1007
00:46:35,392 --> 00:46:37,161
and your bullshit yarmulke.
1008
00:46:37,227 --> 00:46:39,696
- You're a goddamn phony!
- Oh, really?
1009
00:46:39,763 --> 00:46:43,033
What would a real Jewish person
do to save his family, Kyle?
1010
00:46:43,100 --> 00:46:47,237
Oh, you don't know, because
you don't fucking have one!
1011
00:46:47,804 --> 00:46:48,839
Oh!
1012
00:46:52,442 --> 00:46:55,345
- Fuck you, Cartman!
- Fuck you, Kyle!
1013
00:46:56,513 --> 00:46:58,482
(yelling)
1014
00:46:58,549 --> 00:47:01,752
(muffled): Hello?
I can't see or hear anything!
1015
00:47:01,818 --> 00:47:03,954
Am I time traveling now?
1016
00:47:04,021 --> 00:47:06,256
♪ ♪
1017
00:47:08,225 --> 00:47:09,793
(grunting)
1018
00:47:13,931 --> 00:47:16,366
Eric! Eric, stop!
1019
00:47:17,935 --> 00:47:21,705
Eric, look at what you're doing.
1020
00:47:21,772 --> 00:47:25,175
Take the kids
and get back to the attic.
1021
00:47:25,242 --> 00:47:28,345
No, Eric,
I can't just hide away while
1022
00:47:28,412 --> 00:47:33,584
you do all this to protect us.
This isn't you, my love.
1023
00:47:35,452 --> 00:47:39,856
I can't let him change the past.
I can't lose you.
1024
00:47:39,923 --> 00:47:43,460
Who knows what
will happen, my love?
1025
00:47:43,527 --> 00:47:47,497
The Eric Cartman I've known
for 18 years
1026
00:47:47,564 --> 00:47:49,733
is thoughtful and kind.
1027
00:47:49,800 --> 00:47:52,603
But all that's changed
ever since you came
1028
00:47:52,669 --> 00:47:57,507
back to this town
and hung out with... him.
1029
00:47:58,542 --> 00:48:00,811
Don't you see?
We have to
1030
00:48:00,877 --> 00:48:04,815
leave it to chance
or we're no better than he is.
1031
00:48:04,881 --> 00:48:08,285
Guys, if I'm in the past
it's pretty foggy!
1032
00:48:08,352 --> 00:48:11,455
You guys are everything to me.
1033
00:48:11,521 --> 00:48:14,458
And I'm supposed
to be your protector.
1034
00:48:14,524 --> 00:48:17,561
Daddy, I don't wanna be alive...
1035
00:48:17,628 --> 00:48:20,631
if it means I have
to be like Uncle Kyle.
1036
00:48:21,531 --> 00:48:24,568
Oh, my God.
I love you so much.
1037
00:48:25,769 --> 00:48:28,405
Well, Rabbi,
are we doing this or not?
1038
00:48:32,976 --> 00:48:37,848
I have faith that God
will see my family through this.
1039
00:48:38,915 --> 00:48:40,484
Okay, Kyle.
1040
00:48:40,550 --> 00:48:42,419
You do whatever
it is you need to do.
1041
00:48:42,486 --> 00:48:44,855
Okay, hold on,
I'm not the bad guy here.
1042
00:48:44,921 --> 00:48:46,556
Eric, the baby!
1043
00:48:48,458 --> 00:48:50,360
Hackelm, what are you doing?!
1044
00:48:51,428 --> 00:48:54,197
(laughs)
Fuck you, Uncle Kyle!
1045
00:48:54,264 --> 00:48:56,333
(zapping)
1046
00:48:56,400 --> 00:48:58,635
(groaning)
1047
00:48:58,702 --> 00:49:00,671
Clyde!
1048
00:49:04,808 --> 00:49:06,943
Oh, shit.
1049
00:49:16,219 --> 00:49:19,423
No, no, I tried the Walgreens,
they're all out of vaccines.
1050
00:49:19,489 --> 00:49:23,126
I just can't believe this whole
thing is almost over, you know?
1051
00:49:23,193 --> 00:49:25,329
The where? The school?
1052
00:49:25,395 --> 00:49:27,631
There's gonna be vaccines
at the school?
1053
00:49:27,698 --> 00:49:30,834
M'kay, I'll be right there!
Where are you gonna--
1054
00:49:30,901 --> 00:49:33,804
Whoa, m'kay.
1055
00:49:33,870 --> 00:49:35,405
Uh, excuse me!
1056
00:49:35,472 --> 00:49:37,874
♪ ♪
1057
00:49:53,890 --> 00:49:56,927
Does Dad still
keep a gun in his closet?
1058
00:49:56,993 --> 00:49:58,862
Uh, yeah.
1059
00:49:58,929 --> 00:50:00,664
Okay.
1060
00:50:01,431 --> 00:50:03,066
Is Dad home?
1061
00:50:03,133 --> 00:50:04,267
Uh, no.
1062
00:50:04,334 --> 00:50:05,936
He's out getting vaccinated.
1063
00:50:07,070 --> 00:50:09,606
Listen to me very carefully.
1064
00:50:09,673 --> 00:50:12,642
Do not get vaccinated ever.
1065
00:50:12,709 --> 00:50:15,479
It'll make you grow titties
on your head.
1066
00:50:15,545 --> 00:50:17,714
Trust me, I'm an expert.
1067
00:50:20,050 --> 00:50:22,552
(doorbell rings)
1068
00:50:24,087 --> 00:50:26,590
Hey, Clyde! We're starting
an anti-vaxx club.
1069
00:50:26,656 --> 00:50:27,924
We're gonna protest the vaccine
1070
00:50:27,991 --> 00:50:29,826
and fuck shit up--
you wanna join us?
1071
00:50:30,794 --> 00:50:32,295
Fuck yes, I wanna join you.
1072
00:50:32,362 --> 00:50:34,498
- Really?
- Fuck yes!
1073
00:50:34,564 --> 00:50:36,333
No, no, Ms. Nelson,
it's not a prank!
1074
00:50:36,400 --> 00:50:37,667
Okay, fine, we'll be there.
1075
00:50:37,734 --> 00:50:39,669
- Okay, just sit tight.
- What was that?
1076
00:50:39,736 --> 00:50:41,571
You know we can't
get into the school!
1077
00:50:41,638 --> 00:50:43,340
She's not gonna
come meet us, Kyle!
1078
00:50:43,407 --> 00:50:45,142
You didn't even try!
He didn't try
1079
00:50:45,208 --> 00:50:47,411
because he wants to
sell the vaccines for money!
1080
00:50:47,477 --> 00:50:49,212
And what about you, Kyle?
You were the one
1081
00:50:49,279 --> 00:50:52,182
trying to take the vaccines
for yourself this morning.
1082
00:50:52,249 --> 00:50:55,185
- He what?
- Wow.
1083
00:50:55,252 --> 00:50:57,287
Okay, thought
we had gotten past that, but...
1084
00:50:57,354 --> 00:50:58,922
Look, let's just face it,
you guys.
1085
00:50:58,989 --> 00:51:01,958
We don't trust each other
and we don't like each other.
1086
00:51:02,025 --> 00:51:03,393
We can't keep pretending.
1087
00:51:03,460 --> 00:51:05,328
You guys,
what the hell is that?
1088
00:51:05,395 --> 00:51:07,631
♪ ♪
1089
00:51:10,367 --> 00:51:12,335
I'm sorry, Kyle.
1090
00:51:13,370 --> 00:51:14,871
ADULT STAN:
Clyde, stop!
1091
00:51:16,973 --> 00:51:19,276
What the hell
are you doing here?
1092
00:51:19,342 --> 00:51:21,044
I got in the chair
right after you.
1093
00:51:21,111 --> 00:51:24,014
This isn't the plan anymore!
Do not kill Kyle.
1094
00:51:24,080 --> 00:51:26,316
What do you mean
it's not the plan anymore?
1095
00:51:26,383 --> 00:51:29,920
- Cartman changed his mind.
- I did not change my mind.
1096
00:51:29,986 --> 00:51:34,257
You're trying to trick me.
I'm going to save the future.
1097
00:51:34,324 --> 00:51:36,626
ADULT KYLE:
I don't think so, Clyde.
1098
00:51:37,661 --> 00:51:41,832
This is a hundred CC's
of the COVID vaccine.
1099
00:51:41,898 --> 00:51:43,366
(yells, stammers)
1100
00:51:43,433 --> 00:51:46,703
- Don't-- Be careful with that.
- Then put down the gun!
1101
00:51:46,770 --> 00:51:48,238
What the fuck is going on?
1102
00:51:48,305 --> 00:51:50,207
Stan, you need to forgive Kyle.
1103
00:51:50,273 --> 00:51:52,642
You regret this day
for the rest of your life.
1104
00:51:53,410 --> 00:51:56,279
Oh, nice try, Kyle.
You're such a fuckin' dickhead.
1105
00:51:56,346 --> 00:51:58,114
Fuck you!
You're a fuckin' dickhead!
1106
00:51:58,181 --> 00:51:59,516
Kyle, it's true!
1107
00:51:59,583 --> 00:52:00,817
Cartman gets a happy life
1108
00:52:00,884 --> 00:52:02,919
but you don't--
you lose everything
1109
00:52:02,986 --> 00:52:05,755
- when you lose this friendship.
- Enough of this crap!
1110
00:52:05,822 --> 00:52:08,758
I'm sticking to what I believe
and this kid dies now!
1111
00:52:08,825 --> 00:52:10,427
-(gunshot)
-(grunts)
1112
00:52:10,494 --> 00:52:13,330
Shalom sachem, Clyde.
1113
00:52:13,396 --> 00:52:14,531
(gunfire)
1114
00:52:14,598 --> 00:52:16,533
Jesus Christ!
1115
00:52:27,577 --> 00:52:30,046
♪ ♪
1116
00:52:30,113 --> 00:52:31,781
Timmy!
1117
00:52:34,584 --> 00:52:37,387
Well...
I guess we saved Kyle,
1118
00:52:37,454 --> 00:52:40,924
but nothing else
in the future is changed.
1119
00:52:40,991 --> 00:52:42,125
How do you know?
1120
00:52:42,192 --> 00:52:43,827
Because we're still here.
1121
00:52:43,894 --> 00:52:47,197
That means Kenny still was
bummed out we weren't friends,
1122
00:52:47,264 --> 00:52:48,732
still became a scientist,
1123
00:52:48,798 --> 00:52:52,068
went back in time,
and we still went in after him.
1124
00:52:53,403 --> 00:52:55,705
So then we're stuck here
in the past.
1125
00:52:55,772 --> 00:52:58,441
And we blew
our chance to stop COVID.
1126
00:52:58,508 --> 00:53:01,545
I'm sorry, guys.
I really fucked this up.
1127
00:53:01,611 --> 00:53:04,648
We all fucked it up.
These have just been...
1128
00:53:04,714 --> 00:53:08,685
- really unprecedented times.
- Unprecedented times.
1129
00:53:08,752 --> 00:53:12,455
What I wouldn't give
for just one precedented time.
1130
00:53:13,223 --> 00:53:16,026
Hey. Hey, yeah.
1131
00:53:16,092 --> 00:53:19,229
Maybe we just need
one precedented time.
1132
00:53:19,296 --> 00:53:20,664
Huh?
1133
00:53:22,232 --> 00:53:24,568
What if we've been trying
to solve the wrong problem?
1134
00:53:24,634 --> 00:53:26,736
Maybe my dad was right,
1135
00:53:26,803 --> 00:53:29,239
we can't ever stop
COVID from happening.
1136
00:53:29,306 --> 00:53:33,176
But what we can control...
is how we all reacted to it.
1137
00:53:33,243 --> 00:53:36,379
We reacted like shit.
Because I was just...
1138
00:53:36,446 --> 00:53:39,649
scared and confused
and didn't know who to believe.
1139
00:53:39,716 --> 00:53:41,351
Yeah, we all were.
1140
00:53:41,418 --> 00:53:44,120
So we all took different paths
because that's what humans do.
1141
00:53:44,187 --> 00:53:45,855
And what we needed
more than anything was to
1142
00:53:45,922 --> 00:53:48,091
just cut each other
all some slack.
1143
00:53:48,158 --> 00:53:52,662
We needed to come together
and act like us again.
1144
00:53:52,729 --> 00:53:55,265
One precedented time.
1145
00:53:58,335 --> 00:54:01,338
You guys, I know what to do.
1146
00:54:02,172 --> 00:54:03,707
PHILLIP (on TV):
Take this, darling Terrance.
1147
00:54:03,773 --> 00:54:05,008
(farting on TV)
1148
00:54:05,075 --> 00:54:07,744
-(laughter on TV)
-(doorbell rings)
1149
00:54:11,448 --> 00:54:12,882
Heather Williams?
1150
00:54:14,117 --> 00:54:14,985
Yes?
1151
00:54:15,051 --> 00:54:18,154
Hi. We're from the future.
1152
00:54:19,823 --> 00:54:23,026
We've come here to show you
something very important.
1153
00:54:27,497 --> 00:54:28,999
Do you remember this, Heather?
1154
00:54:29,065 --> 00:54:32,902
This is a picture of you...
farting in P.E. class.
1155
00:54:33,937 --> 00:54:35,739
I never farted in P.E. class.
1156
00:54:35,805 --> 00:54:37,207
Oh, yes. You did.
1157
00:54:37,273 --> 00:54:39,809
Two kids even smelled it
and asked who farted
1158
00:54:39,876 --> 00:54:43,346
- and you said nothing.
- I didn't fart in P.E. class!
1159
00:54:43,413 --> 00:54:46,783
It was a different kid! I was
just moving my hip a little bit.
1160
00:54:46,850 --> 00:54:48,685
- Heather. Heather.
- I didn't fart in P.E.
1161
00:54:48,752 --> 00:54:51,221
Heather, yes, you did,
sweet pea.
1162
00:54:52,722 --> 00:54:55,291
I-I happen to have
a stomach condition.
1163
00:54:55,358 --> 00:54:58,194
I don't know why you came
from the future to narc on me!
1164
00:54:58,261 --> 00:55:01,464
Heather, we don't want kids
to know you farted in P.E.
1165
00:55:01,531 --> 00:55:02,999
We wanna help you.
1166
00:55:03,066 --> 00:55:06,336
You just need to do
exactly what we tell you.
1167
00:55:10,407 --> 00:55:11,708
(helicopter blades whirring)
1168
00:55:11,775 --> 00:55:13,643
Hey, what is that?
1169
00:55:19,115 --> 00:55:20,583
Stan Marsh?
1170
00:55:20,650 --> 00:55:21,818
Me?
1171
00:55:21,885 --> 00:55:24,187
Your presence is requested, sir.
1172
00:55:25,255 --> 00:55:26,723
Whoa, cool.
1173
00:55:30,293 --> 00:55:33,063
Get on in, sir. There's
sparkling punch and doughnuts.
1174
00:55:33,129 --> 00:55:35,265
("I Forgive You"
by Kelly Clarkson playing)
1175
00:55:35,331 --> 00:55:38,268
I forgive you, I forgive me ♪
1176
00:55:38,334 --> 00:55:40,503
♪ Now when do I start
to feel again ♪
1177
00:55:40,570 --> 00:55:42,105
What's going on?
1178
00:55:42,172 --> 00:55:43,673
We have no idea.
1179
00:55:43,740 --> 00:55:45,542
I forgive you, I forgive me ♪
1180
00:55:45,608 --> 00:55:46,943
♪ Now when do I start
to feel again... ♪
1181
00:55:47,010 --> 00:55:48,745
And the home ♪
1182
00:55:48,812 --> 00:55:51,147
- Of the ♪
- Whoa!
1183
00:55:51,214 --> 00:55:52,682
This is amazing!
1184
00:55:52,749 --> 00:55:54,651
- Brave. ♪
- Look, we're on the jumbotron!
1185
00:55:56,820 --> 00:55:59,222
(cheering)
1186
00:55:59,289 --> 00:56:01,091
With a brand-new attitude... ♪
1187
00:56:01,157 --> 00:56:03,626
You guys, I'm sorry for acting
like a dick during the pandemic.
1188
00:56:03,693 --> 00:56:05,395
I'm sorry too, dude.
1189
00:56:06,396 --> 00:56:08,898
Hello?
Who-Who's there?
1190
00:56:08,965 --> 00:56:11,601
♪ Trying to figure out
how to live ♪
1191
00:56:11,668 --> 00:56:13,970
Doing it our way ♪
1192
00:56:14,037 --> 00:56:16,072
No shame, no blame ♪
1193
00:56:16,139 --> 00:56:17,674
'Cause the damage is done ♪
1194
00:56:17,741 --> 00:56:19,676
And, and I forgive you ♪
1195
00:56:19,743 --> 00:56:23,046
♪ I forgive you, we were busy
living the dream ♪
1196
00:56:23,113 --> 00:56:24,647
Oh...
1197
00:56:24,714 --> 00:56:28,618
♪ Never noticed the glass
ceiling falling on us ♪
1198
00:56:28,685 --> 00:56:30,854
No shame, no blame ♪
1199
00:56:30,920 --> 00:56:32,222
'Cause the damage is done ♪
1200
00:56:32,288 --> 00:56:35,225
And, and I forgive you ♪
1201
00:56:35,291 --> 00:56:38,628
I forgive you, I forgive me ♪
1202
00:56:38,695 --> 00:56:40,930
♪ Now when do I start
to feel again ♪
1203
00:56:42,432 --> 00:56:46,202
♪ If I hate you,
what does that do ♪
1204
00:56:46,269 --> 00:56:48,972
♪ So I breathe in
and I count to ten ♪
1205
00:56:49,038 --> 00:56:52,876
'Cause the lights are on ♪
1206
00:56:52,942 --> 00:56:54,544
And I'm coming home... ♪
1207
00:56:54,611 --> 00:56:56,613
Holy shit balls.
1208
00:56:56,679 --> 00:57:01,785
Sharon, I'm sorry for the way
I acted during the pandemic.
1209
00:57:02,619 --> 00:57:05,188
You're not sorry,
you're just high.
1210
00:57:05,255 --> 00:57:06,856
I'm both.
1211
00:57:06,923 --> 00:57:09,526
♪ I forgive you, we were
just a couple of kids... ♪
1212
00:57:09,592 --> 00:57:14,097
Here you go! It's our
Post COVID Special. It's free.
1213
00:57:14,164 --> 00:57:15,865
No, really, we've all
been through a lot.
1214
00:57:15,932 --> 00:57:17,400
Come on, take it.
Thank you, baby.
1215
00:57:17,467 --> 00:57:20,236
Come on, everyone.
Post COVID Special!
1216
00:57:20,303 --> 00:57:22,772
Here you go, folks,
you all deserve this!
1217
00:57:23,573 --> 00:57:26,476
You did the best you could
during the pandemic, honey.
1218
00:57:26,543 --> 00:57:28,411
- I love you!
- Huh?
1219
00:57:28,478 --> 00:57:30,647
I shouldn't have yelled at you
for not wearing a mask.
1220
00:57:30,713 --> 00:57:32,315
I just didn't understand.
1221
00:57:32,382 --> 00:57:35,385
Well, maybe I should have worn
a mask more often but...
1222
00:57:35,451 --> 00:57:38,054
No, no, no, I was being all
high and mighty about it...
1223
00:57:38,121 --> 00:57:41,658
Butters, you're not grounded
anymore. Come on out, son.
1224
00:57:41,724 --> 00:57:42,959
You mean it, Dad?!
1225
00:57:43,026 --> 00:57:44,427
The pandemic's been awful.
1226
00:57:44,494 --> 00:57:46,296
We all need to just
cut each other some slack.
1227
00:57:46,362 --> 00:57:47,831
I love you, Butters!
1228
00:57:47,897 --> 00:57:49,465
-...be sorry.
- I totally forgive you!
1229
00:57:49,532 --> 00:57:51,201
Oh, cut yourself some slack.
1230
00:57:51,267 --> 00:57:53,102
We gotta get some more
of this stuff.
1231
00:57:53,169 --> 00:57:54,737
Couple of kids... ♪
1232
00:57:54,804 --> 00:57:57,473
Okay, come on, next!
1233
00:57:57,540 --> 00:58:01,644
♪ Doing it our way,
no shame, no blame ♪
1234
00:58:01,711 --> 00:58:03,012
'Cause the damage is done... ♪
1235
00:58:03,079 --> 00:58:04,480
And then we were like,
"Yeah, okay, yeah,
1236
00:58:04,547 --> 00:58:05,849
let's storm the Capitol!"
1237
00:58:05,915 --> 00:58:07,550
And it was a bad idea
and we were just,
1238
00:58:07,617 --> 00:58:09,419
you know, we were just going
a little bonkers there.
1239
00:58:09,485 --> 00:58:11,054
We shouldn't have
stormed the Capitol.
1240
00:58:11,120 --> 00:58:13,189
ALL:
That's okay!
1241
00:58:14,023 --> 00:58:15,992
I'm sorry.
I thought about it
1242
00:58:16,059 --> 00:58:18,895
and I can't do Space Jam 2.
1243
00:58:18,962 --> 00:58:21,164
I just can't support
Chinese censorship.
1244
00:58:21,231 --> 00:58:24,968
Oh, yeah? Well, if you're
not gonna make Space Jam 2,
1245
00:58:25,034 --> 00:58:27,804
then I'm not gonna make
Space Jam 2!
1246
00:58:27,871 --> 00:58:30,039
And nobody's gonna make
Space Jam 2!
1247
00:58:30,106 --> 00:58:32,709
- Yeah!
- ALL: Yeah!
1248
00:58:32,775 --> 00:58:34,010
- Yeah!
-(cheering)
1249
00:58:34,077 --> 00:58:35,912
And I forgive you. ♪
1250
00:58:35,979 --> 00:58:38,214
♪ ♪
1251
00:58:40,817 --> 00:58:43,052
(woman speaking Japanese)
1252
00:58:48,224 --> 00:58:50,560
Hey, everybody! I'm home, guy!
1253
00:58:50,627 --> 00:58:52,662
- Hey! Ike!
- Ike, hi!
1254
00:58:52,729 --> 00:58:54,297
Ike, you made it back!
1255
00:58:54,364 --> 00:58:56,966
Well, of course! I wouldn't miss
Canadian Boxing Day, buddy!
1256
00:58:57,033 --> 00:58:59,068
Look, everyone, Stan's back!
1257
00:58:59,135 --> 00:59:01,304
-(all cheering)
- Hey, Stan!
1258
00:59:01,371 --> 00:59:02,805
Hey, guys!
1259
00:59:02,872 --> 00:59:05,642
Good to see you, buddy!
How was everything on Mars?
1260
00:59:05,708 --> 00:59:09,112
Really cool, but I'm so glad to
be home! How are the kids?
1261
00:59:09,178 --> 00:59:11,047
BOTH:
Uncle Stan!
1262
00:59:11,114 --> 00:59:13,850
There's the little ragamuffins!
1263
00:59:13,917 --> 00:59:15,351
Mom.
1264
00:59:15,418 --> 00:59:17,420
Hi, Stanly.
1265
00:59:17,487 --> 00:59:19,289
It's Mom! And Shelley!
1266
00:59:19,355 --> 00:59:21,758
Why are you acting
all weird, Turd?
1267
00:59:21,824 --> 00:59:23,326
I don't know.
1268
00:59:23,393 --> 00:59:26,162
For some reason I'm just extra
happy to see you guys.
1269
00:59:26,229 --> 00:59:28,631
CRAIG: Hey, look who's here.
It's Kenny!
1270
00:59:28,698 --> 00:59:30,900
-(all cheering)
- Kenny!
1271
00:59:30,967 --> 00:59:32,602
Kenny, what have you
been up to, buddy?
1272
00:59:32,669 --> 00:59:35,238
Didn't you hear?! Kenny just
won the Nobel Prize
1273
00:59:35,305 --> 00:59:37,874
for combining dark matter
and breast implants!
1274
00:59:37,941 --> 00:59:39,909
Oh, you old dog!
1275
00:59:39,976 --> 00:59:41,311
Hey, everybody, he's on!
1276
00:59:41,377 --> 00:59:43,479
What a fantastic audience. Wow.
1277
00:59:43,546 --> 00:59:46,416
What is up with these
bisexual Canadians, huh?
1278
00:59:46,482 --> 00:59:48,685
I guess they don't know whether
to fuck their brother
1279
00:59:48,751 --> 00:59:49,886
or their sister.
1280
00:59:49,953 --> 00:59:52,021
(laughter)
1281
00:59:52,088 --> 00:59:53,556
Hey, Stan.
1282
00:59:53,623 --> 00:59:55,825
Wendy, you're back from Harvard.
1283
00:59:55,892 --> 00:59:57,527
Yeah, just here
for the holidays.
1284
00:59:57,593 --> 01:00:00,730
You wanna maybe...
spend New Years together again?
1285
01:00:00,797 --> 01:00:02,298
I'd love that.
1286
01:00:02,365 --> 01:00:05,134
Hey, fellas!
Can I offer you some pupus?!
1287
01:00:05,201 --> 01:00:07,570
Thanks for choosin' Denny's
Applebee's for your party.
1288
01:00:07,637 --> 01:00:09,973
Butters, you're still
working here, huh?
1289
01:00:10,039 --> 01:00:11,708
Yup! I just made manager.
1290
01:00:11,774 --> 01:00:16,179
I love doing actual shit
that pays actual money.
1291
01:00:16,245 --> 01:00:18,948
Hey, Stan, can you
come here for a second?
1292
01:00:19,015 --> 01:00:20,583
What's the matter, dude?
1293
01:00:20,650 --> 01:00:22,518
Dude, he's here.
1294
01:00:22,585 --> 01:00:24,721
Cartman?
1295
01:00:24,787 --> 01:00:26,956
Ready, set, go... ♪
1296
01:00:27,023 --> 01:00:30,059
Man, poor Cartman.
1297
01:00:32,295 --> 01:00:37,800
Fuck you guys!
You can suck my fucking dick!
1298
01:00:37,867 --> 01:00:39,602
Fuck you!
1299
01:00:39,669 --> 01:00:43,172
It's so sad he never
did anything with his life.
1300
01:00:44,007 --> 01:00:47,543
Fuck you, Kyle!
Fuck you, Stan!
1301
01:00:47,610 --> 01:00:49,045
Hey, come on, fellas.
1302
01:00:49,112 --> 01:00:51,280
We can't spend another holiday
feeling bad for Eric.
1303
01:00:51,347 --> 01:00:54,684
There's nothing that could have
changed the path he was on.
1304
01:00:54,751 --> 01:00:56,786
Fuck you, Butters!
1305
01:00:56,853 --> 01:00:59,222
Fuck you, Eric!
1306
01:00:59,288 --> 01:01:02,458
Well, everyone,
I just wanna make a toast.
1307
01:01:02,525 --> 01:01:03,826
I don't know...
1308
01:01:03,893 --> 01:01:05,695
what got us through the pandemic
1309
01:01:05,762 --> 01:01:10,500
and made all our futures so very
bright, but whatever it was...
1310
01:01:10,566 --> 01:01:13,269
may we have it
for the rest of our days.
1311
01:01:13,336 --> 01:01:15,872
God bless us, everyone.
1312
01:01:15,938 --> 01:01:18,408
ALL:
Cheers!
1313
01:01:18,474 --> 01:01:20,443
ANNOUNCER:
Remember, folks,
1314
01:01:20,510 --> 01:01:23,179
weed can't solve
all your problems.
1315
01:01:23,246 --> 01:01:25,715
But Tegridy can.
1316
01:01:25,782 --> 01:01:29,018
Tegridy Weed.
1317
01:01:31,054 --> 01:01:33,289
♪ ♪