1
00:00:09,760 --> 00:00:12,763
{\an8}[♪ upbeat theme music playing]
2
00:00:34,660 --> 00:00:36,745
- [glass shattering]
- [♪ theme concludes]
3
00:00:37,079 --> 00:00:40,290
[♪ soft music playing]
4
00:00:40,374 --> 00:00:43,043
Ah, the universe.
5
00:00:43,126 --> 00:00:44,253
I'm sick of it!
6
00:00:44,336 --> 00:00:47,089
We know more about
the most distant galaxies
7
00:00:47,172 --> 00:00:50,050
than about this majestic ocean right here.
8
00:00:50,133 --> 00:00:52,636
- [Leela] That's the Hudson River.
- [Professor] Eh, the whuuh?
9
00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:54,304
[Bender] Nature's trashcan.
10
00:00:54,388 --> 00:00:56,473
[grunts] Nailed it!
11
00:00:56,556 --> 00:00:59,643
It's high time we explored the oceans.
12
00:00:59,726 --> 00:01:01,603
{\an8}- [wrench clanking]
- I just need to make a few
13
00:01:01,687 --> 00:01:03,981
{\an8}small modifications to the ship.
14
00:01:04,064 --> 00:01:05,107
{\an8}Nothing major.
15
00:01:05,190 --> 00:01:07,609
{\an8}I'll start with the modification nut.
16
00:01:07,693 --> 00:01:09,570
{\an8}[grunting] Oof.
17
00:01:09,653 --> 00:01:11,613
{\an8}And... done.
18
00:01:11,697 --> 00:01:12,906
[ship horn blowing]
19
00:01:12,990 --> 00:01:15,993
[♪ light tropical music playing]
20
00:01:17,244 --> 00:01:20,455
{\an8}♪ When laughs are hard to come by ♪
21
00:01:20,539 --> 00:01:24,626
{\an8}- [tentacle thuds]
- ♪ Relax, just don't even try ♪
22
00:01:24,710 --> 00:01:25,836
{\an8}- [glass shattering]
- [laughter]
23
00:01:25,919 --> 00:01:29,631
{\an8}♪ The laugh track ♪
24
00:01:29,715 --> 00:01:32,050
{\an8}♪ Indicates there's been a joke ♪
25
00:01:32,134 --> 00:01:33,135
{\an8}[audience laughing]
26
00:01:33,218 --> 00:01:37,556
{\an8}♪ The laugh track ♪
27
00:01:37,639 --> 00:01:40,392
{\an8}♪ Helps out the slower folk ♪
28
00:01:40,475 --> 00:01:41,602
{\an8}[audience laughing]
29
00:01:41,685 --> 00:01:43,562
{\an8}-♪ Laughs ♪
- ♪ Amuse us ♪
30
00:01:43,645 --> 00:01:45,689
{\an8}-♪ Laughs ♪
- ♪ Inspire us ♪
31
00:01:45,772 --> 00:01:47,316
{\an8}-♪ Laughs ♪
- ♪ More contagious ♪
32
00:01:47,399 --> 00:01:49,943
{\an8}♪ Than the Norovirus ♪
33
00:01:50,027 --> 00:01:53,405
{\an8}♪ Turn up your knob ♪
34
00:01:53,488 --> 00:01:57,784
♪ For laughs ♪
35
00:01:57,868 --> 00:02:00,412
♪ Turn up your knob for laughs ♪
36
00:02:00,495 --> 00:02:02,497
[audience laughing]
37
00:02:04,166 --> 00:02:06,043
{\an8}[Amy] Wow. The passenger manifest
38
00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:09,588
{\an8}reads like a who's who
of B-list celebrities.
39
00:02:09,671 --> 00:02:12,758
{\an8}- More like B-minus.
- [audience laughing]
40
00:02:12,841 --> 00:02:14,801
{\an8}No, B was about right.
41
00:02:14,885 --> 00:02:17,346
{\an8}Look! There's Monique and Boxy Robot
42
00:02:17,429 --> 00:02:19,473
{\an8}from that show people used to watch.
43
00:02:19,556 --> 00:02:20,766
{\an8}That's strange.
44
00:02:20,849 --> 00:02:24,311
I thought Monique was dating
famous acting robot Calculon.
45
00:02:24,394 --> 00:02:26,396
Hm. He's not on the list,
46
00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:30,484
but we do have a mysterious
Elvis impersonator.
47
00:02:30,567 --> 00:02:31,902
{\an8}[♪ sneaky music playing]
48
00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:35,739
{\an8}Wow! He looks exactly like
a real Elvis impersonator.
49
00:02:35,822 --> 00:02:37,866
{\an8}- [audience laughing]
- Speaking of "wow,"
50
00:02:37,949 --> 00:02:40,035
{\an8}there's Florp, the famous comedian,
51
00:02:40,118 --> 00:02:43,914
{\an8}and his agent-slash-lover,
Ivana Tenpercinski.
52
00:02:43,997 --> 00:02:47,376
{\an8}My secret dream
was always to be a comedian,
53
00:02:47,459 --> 00:02:50,253
{\an8}but I was too scared the audience
would get up and walk out.
54
00:02:50,337 --> 00:02:52,297
{\an8}Like that patient you declared dead.
55
00:02:52,381 --> 00:02:54,007
{\an8}[audience laughing]
56
00:02:54,091 --> 00:02:57,803
And there's that famous magician,
The Great Revealo.
57
00:02:57,886 --> 00:02:59,388
He looks so sad.
58
00:02:59,471 --> 00:03:01,223
I shall explain why,
59
00:03:01,306 --> 00:03:02,557
from over there!
60
00:03:02,641 --> 00:03:04,059
[smoke bomb exploding]
61
00:03:04,142 --> 00:03:06,687
The smoke concealed my movements.
62
00:03:06,770 --> 00:03:07,938
If you say so.
63
00:03:08,021 --> 00:03:11,274
You see, I was engaged
to my beautiful assistant,
64
00:03:11,358 --> 00:03:13,735
but she died in a magic accident.
65
00:03:13,819 --> 00:03:17,364
I was sawing her in half
when suddenly, she passed away
66
00:03:17,447 --> 00:03:18,824
from old age,
67
00:03:18,907 --> 00:03:21,159
- and maybe a little bit of sawing.
- [audience laughing]
68
00:03:21,243 --> 00:03:24,121
I always had a thing for magicians.
69
00:03:24,204 --> 00:03:25,205
Really?
70
00:03:25,288 --> 00:03:26,498
I like magic, too.
71
00:03:26,581 --> 00:03:28,875
Oh, I don't like magic. Blegh!
72
00:03:28,959 --> 00:03:31,086
All that unnecessary hand motion.
73
00:03:31,169 --> 00:03:34,756
[laughing] No.
I'm just really into magicians.
74
00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:36,174
[sighs]
75
00:03:37,592 --> 00:03:40,512
[♪ upbeat rock 'n roll music playing]
76
00:03:40,595 --> 00:03:42,222
"Jailhouse Rock," ma'am.
77
00:03:42,305 --> 00:03:44,182
"Blue Suede Shoes" to you, sir.
78
00:03:44,266 --> 00:03:46,351
I mean, what is the deal
79
00:03:46,435 --> 00:03:49,020
with those people at the buffet?
Know what I'm saying?
80
00:03:49,104 --> 00:03:51,356
They're all like...
[growling and grumbling]
81
00:03:51,440 --> 00:03:53,316
- [group laughing]
- [glass shattering]
82
00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:54,693
[passenger] My hip!
83
00:03:54,776 --> 00:03:56,611
Wonderful, Mr. Florp!
84
00:03:56,695 --> 00:03:57,946
I'm a huge fan.
85
00:03:58,071 --> 00:03:59,906
Yeah. Thanks, uh...?
[awkward chuckle]
86
00:03:59,990 --> 00:04:02,325
Dr. Zoidberg, your ship's doctor,
87
00:04:02,409 --> 00:04:04,703
but more importantly, an aspiring standup
88
00:04:04,786 --> 00:04:06,705
who could use some advice, maybe?
89
00:04:06,788 --> 00:04:08,290
Advice? Sure.
90
00:04:08,373 --> 00:04:10,625
The setup comes before the punchline,
91
00:04:10,709 --> 00:04:14,463
and the paycheck comes
before your ass walks on that stage.
92
00:04:14,546 --> 00:04:16,506
- [shouting]
- Oh-ho!
93
00:04:16,590 --> 00:04:19,301
Worldly advice
sweetened with a hilarious joke.
94
00:04:19,384 --> 00:04:21,052
Thank you, friend.
95
00:04:21,136 --> 00:04:23,054
[Florp screaming]
96
00:04:23,138 --> 00:04:24,890
[Florp] You've been
a great audience, good night!
97
00:04:24,973 --> 00:04:27,058
- [water splashing]
- [audience laughing]
98
00:04:27,142 --> 00:04:29,269
Zoidberg, what have you done?
99
00:04:29,352 --> 00:04:32,564
You've opened up a spot
in tonight's big comedy show, that's what.
100
00:04:32,647 --> 00:04:34,357
But my act is terrible.
101
00:04:34,441 --> 00:04:35,609
I need a plan.
102
00:04:35,692 --> 00:04:38,737
Think, you untalented,
murderous bastard. Think!
103
00:04:38,820 --> 00:04:39,821
[gasps] I know.
104
00:04:39,905 --> 00:04:41,740
A laugh track machine!
105
00:04:41,823 --> 00:04:45,744
Those make even the laziest comedy
seem hilari-funny.
106
00:04:45,827 --> 00:04:47,496
[audience laughing and clapping]
107
00:04:47,579 --> 00:04:50,957
[♪ lighthearted suspenseful music playing]
108
00:04:51,041 --> 00:04:53,084
Ooh. Oh, yeah.
109
00:04:55,128 --> 00:04:57,380
Problems with the ladies?
110
00:04:57,464 --> 00:04:59,007
Lay it on me, bro.
111
00:04:59,090 --> 00:05:01,134
Confess to the Profess.
112
00:05:01,218 --> 00:05:03,470
Leela's gaga over some magician.
113
00:05:03,553 --> 00:05:06,556
It's like every time he shows up,
he makes me disappear.
114
00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:08,308
- [audience laughing]
- My man,
115
00:05:08,391 --> 00:05:10,644
you gotta fight magic with magic.
116
00:05:10,727 --> 00:05:13,188
The love magic that's in your heart.
117
00:05:13,271 --> 00:05:14,356
Dig? [clicking tongue]
118
00:05:14,439 --> 00:05:15,732
- [gun fires]
- [glass shattering]
119
00:05:15,816 --> 00:05:18,276
- [audience laughing]
- I'll put that on your tab.
120
00:05:18,360 --> 00:05:20,362
[Scruffy grunting]
121
00:05:21,196 --> 00:05:22,447
- [flames whooshing]
- [coughing]
122
00:05:22,531 --> 00:05:25,158
Why, if it isn't Chief Engineer Scruffy!
123
00:05:25,242 --> 00:05:26,618
Doc, you gotta help me.
124
00:05:26,701 --> 00:05:28,161
I've been vomitin' blood.
125
00:05:28,245 --> 00:05:30,622
- [Scruffy coughing]
- [audience laughing]
126
00:05:30,705 --> 00:05:32,707
That's just Norovirus.
127
00:05:32,791 --> 00:05:35,168
Everyone gets it on every cruise.
128
00:05:35,252 --> 00:05:37,712
Now, move over.
I got a comedy career to save.
129
00:05:37,796 --> 00:05:39,798
You're a machine, right, Boiler?
130
00:05:39,881 --> 00:05:41,132
- Yesss.
- [steam hissing]
131
00:05:41,216 --> 00:05:42,843
I suspected as much.
132
00:05:42,926 --> 00:05:45,220
So, you can also work
as a laugh track machine?
133
00:05:45,303 --> 00:05:46,721
Boy, can I?
134
00:05:46,805 --> 00:05:49,975
[multiple voices laughing]
135
00:05:50,058 --> 00:05:51,601
- You're hired!
- [steam hissing]
136
00:05:53,812 --> 00:05:55,146
[Scruffy groaning]
137
00:05:56,106 --> 00:05:57,858
[♪ lighthearted music playing]
138
00:05:57,941 --> 00:06:01,236
Oh, Boxy, I'm ready to do it with you.
139
00:06:01,319 --> 00:06:03,405
- [Boxy beeping]
- Aha!
140
00:06:03,488 --> 00:06:05,240
"Aha," what, Mr. Presley?
141
00:06:05,323 --> 00:06:07,117
- Guess again.
- [♪ dramatic sting]
142
00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:08,702
King of rock 'n roll?
143
00:06:08,785 --> 00:06:10,078
Guess a third time.
144
00:06:10,161 --> 00:06:11,246
[♪ dramatic sting]
145
00:06:13,957 --> 00:06:16,877
I don't suppose you could sing
"Heartbreak Hotel"?
146
00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:18,545
- Oh, for the love of...
- [fabric ripping]
147
00:06:18,628 --> 00:06:19,838
[♪ dramatic sting]
148
00:06:19,921 --> 00:06:21,631
[gasps] Calculon!
149
00:06:21,715 --> 00:06:24,259
What a shame.
You just missed Elvis.
150
00:06:24,342 --> 00:06:27,470
You cheated on me
with this clunky Casanova?
151
00:06:27,554 --> 00:06:28,597
Why?
152
00:06:28,680 --> 00:06:30,265
- And whither?!
- [glass shattering]
153
00:06:30,348 --> 00:06:32,642
I never told you this, Calculon,
154
00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:36,146
but Boxy and I are cousins.
155
00:06:36,229 --> 00:06:37,647
[♪ intense dramatic sting]
156
00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:38,857
Oh, right.
157
00:06:38,940 --> 00:06:40,317
You did tell me, but I'd forgotten.
158
00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:43,445
We've come to throw our late
grandmother's remains into the ocean.
159
00:06:43,528 --> 00:06:45,363
She was a wine bucket bot.
160
00:06:45,447 --> 00:06:47,824
Her dying wish
was that we share the bottle
161
00:06:47,908 --> 00:06:49,951
she'd spent her life chilling.
162
00:06:50,035 --> 00:06:52,621
- Oops. Lucky for her, she's dead.
- [audience laughing]
163
00:06:52,704 --> 00:06:54,664
Monique, I've been such a fool.
164
00:06:54,748 --> 00:06:57,125
Can you ever... marry me?
165
00:06:57,208 --> 00:06:59,127
Oh, Calculon! Yes!
166
00:06:59,210 --> 00:07:01,921
Yes with a billion zeroes after it.
167
00:07:02,005 --> 00:07:03,673
- [♪ soft romantic music playing]
- [lips clanging]
168
00:07:03,757 --> 00:07:05,925
[Monique groaning]
169
00:07:06,009 --> 00:07:09,179
- [Boxy beeps]
- [audience laughing]
170
00:07:09,262 --> 00:07:10,805
[♪ upbeat music playing]
171
00:07:10,889 --> 00:07:12,724
[paper rustling]
172
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:17,145
Oh! I can't believe Florp fell overboard
173
00:07:17,228 --> 00:07:19,397
the very minute the cruise started.
174
00:07:19,481 --> 00:07:20,815
It happens a lot.
175
00:07:20,899 --> 00:07:23,109
We navigate home
by the trail of floating bodies.
176
00:07:23,193 --> 00:07:25,862
[boiler laughing in multiple voices]
177
00:07:28,239 --> 00:07:29,449
Oh, hiya, folks.
178
00:07:29,532 --> 00:07:31,534
Sorry Florp couldn't make it tonight.
179
00:07:31,618 --> 00:07:33,578
He had a death in the family.
180
00:07:33,662 --> 00:07:34,663
His own!
181
00:07:34,746 --> 00:07:35,830
And joke.
182
00:07:36,498 --> 00:07:38,625
[boiler laughing in multiple voices]
183
00:07:38,708 --> 00:07:40,418
[Ivana sobbing]
184
00:07:40,502 --> 00:07:42,420
I'll never laugh again.
185
00:07:42,504 --> 00:07:44,631
So, these two items walk into a bar
186
00:07:44,714 --> 00:07:47,092
and the punchline says,
"You guys are nuts."
187
00:07:47,175 --> 00:07:48,426
And then, the setup goes,
188
00:07:48,510 --> 00:07:51,513
"They were a cashew and a pistachio."
189
00:07:51,596 --> 00:07:54,265
{\an8}[boiler laughing in multiple voices]
190
00:07:54,349 --> 00:07:55,600
And joke!
191
00:07:55,684 --> 00:07:58,728
Ugh, this act is a total train wreck.
192
00:07:58,812 --> 00:08:01,439
Or I guess I should say, shipwreck.
193
00:08:01,523 --> 00:08:04,526
- [ship horn blares]
- [♪ intense dramatic music playing]
194
00:08:05,985 --> 00:08:07,529
[raucous audience laughter]
195
00:08:08,613 --> 00:08:11,408
[♪ light, upbeat music playing]
196
00:08:13,493 --> 00:08:15,704
Leela, I know you like magicians,
197
00:08:15,787 --> 00:08:19,040
so I worked up a private show
just for you.
198
00:08:19,124 --> 00:08:22,127
- [sniffing] What smells?
- Oh, the hat, sorry.
199
00:08:22,210 --> 00:08:24,254
I borrowed it from The Great Revealo.
200
00:08:24,337 --> 00:08:27,257
In the depths of his sorrow,
he forgot to feed his rabbit.
201
00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:29,217
- [bones clattering]
- [audience laughing]
202
00:08:29,300 --> 00:08:32,679
And now, young lady,
if you'll step up on stage.
203
00:08:32,762 --> 00:08:34,472
Fry, please. You're never going to--
204
00:08:34,556 --> 00:08:36,474
Pesto al dente.
205
00:08:36,558 --> 00:08:38,268
[♪ soft, ethereal music playing]
206
00:08:38,351 --> 00:08:41,104
[gasps] I can't believe it.
207
00:08:41,187 --> 00:08:43,565
This is the first time
I've actually been amazed
208
00:08:43,648 --> 00:08:44,983
by a magic trick.
209
00:08:45,066 --> 00:08:48,570
For you, Leela,
I'd pull a rabbit out of anything.
210
00:08:48,653 --> 00:08:50,780
- [lips smacking]
- [audience swooning]
211
00:08:50,864 --> 00:08:53,324
- But how did you do this?
- Easy.
212
00:08:53,408 --> 00:08:56,536
Electromagnets.
I found them in the ship's radar.
213
00:08:56,619 --> 00:08:57,787
[electricity zapping]
214
00:08:57,871 --> 00:08:58,872
What?!
215
00:08:58,955 --> 00:09:00,498
You disabled the radar?
216
00:09:00,582 --> 00:09:02,917
- [hologram zapping]
- Oh no, we're off course!
217
00:09:03,001 --> 00:09:05,795
We're in the Antarctic
instead of the Caribbean.
218
00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:07,422
Ta-da!
219
00:09:07,505 --> 00:09:09,883
- [♪ intense dramatic music playing]
- [ship crashing]
220
00:09:10,884 --> 00:09:12,469
- [glass shattering]
- [Zoidberg grunting]
221
00:09:12,552 --> 00:09:14,804
Oy! Ah! Huh?
222
00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:17,849
Oy, I broke all my tuchuses!
223
00:09:17,932 --> 00:09:20,477
[Ivana laughing]
224
00:09:20,560 --> 00:09:24,105
Oh, somehow, Dr. Zoidberg,
you made me laugh again.
225
00:09:24,189 --> 00:09:26,316
Let me be your agent and lover.
226
00:09:26,399 --> 00:09:30,487
I want 10% of your income
and 90% of your love.
227
00:09:30,570 --> 00:09:34,866
Go 8% on income,
and you can have 93% of my love.
228
00:09:34,949 --> 00:09:35,992
Deal.
229
00:09:36,076 --> 00:09:38,078
- [♪ soft, romantic music playing]
- [couple moaning]
230
00:09:38,161 --> 00:09:41,039
{\an8}[boiler laughing in multiple voices]
231
00:09:41,122 --> 00:09:43,208
{\an8}[boiler screaming in multiple voices]
232
00:09:45,835 --> 00:09:48,296
[dramatic narrator]
The wreck set off a rare ice fire.
233
00:09:48,379 --> 00:09:52,884
And as Antarctica melted,
sea levels rose catastrophically
234
00:09:52,967 --> 00:09:56,346
until virtually all land was underwater.
235
00:09:56,429 --> 00:10:00,975
It became clear from my tone of voice
that things were grim.
236
00:10:01,059 --> 00:10:03,645
But a few hardy survivors lived on
237
00:10:03,728 --> 00:10:06,815
in a brutal, makeshift existence
known as...
238
00:10:06,898 --> 00:10:09,734
{\an8}- [water splashing]
- Wetterworld.
239
00:10:10,985 --> 00:10:14,114
[♪ slow, dramatic music playing]
240
00:10:15,657 --> 00:10:17,075
[Amy] Oh, no!
241
00:10:17,158 --> 00:10:19,202
The marauders are gaining on us!
242
00:10:19,285 --> 00:10:22,288
- [guns firing]
- [Roberto] Ha-haw!
243
00:10:22,372 --> 00:10:23,873
They're after our food!
244
00:10:23,957 --> 00:10:26,292
Protect the all-you-can-eat buffet
with your lives.
245
00:10:26,376 --> 00:10:28,628
Give us the whatchamacallit!
246
00:10:28,711 --> 00:10:30,338
Macaroni salad.
247
00:10:30,421 --> 00:10:32,590
Or we'll cut off your kajiggers!
248
00:10:32,674 --> 00:10:33,675
Heads.
249
00:10:33,758 --> 00:10:35,593
Ow! My kajigger!
250
00:10:35,677 --> 00:10:37,178
Hey, hand me that whisk, will you?
251
00:10:38,721 --> 00:10:41,683
Don't fire until you see
the whites of their eggs.
252
00:10:41,766 --> 00:10:43,059
- [slingshot sproings]
- Ow!
253
00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:44,269
[Amy grunting]
254
00:10:45,186 --> 00:10:46,729
- [metal clanging]
- [rope creaking]
255
00:10:46,813 --> 00:10:50,650
[group shrieking]
256
00:10:51,151 --> 00:10:52,485
[Professor] Oh!
257
00:10:53,903 --> 00:10:54,988
Not good!
258
00:10:55,989 --> 00:10:58,825
- Hi-ya!
- [engine rumbling]
259
00:10:58,908 --> 00:11:00,076
Hello.
260
00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:03,163
- [jet skis exploding]
- They exploded!
261
00:11:03,246 --> 00:11:04,706
[group laughing and cheering]
262
00:11:04,789 --> 00:11:06,291
You saved us, Leela.
263
00:11:06,374 --> 00:11:07,417
Well, some of us.
264
00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:10,712
You're the best captain
in the whole Freeboater Alliance.
265
00:11:10,795 --> 00:11:13,464
I just hope the bloodshed
will impress my boss,
266
00:11:13,548 --> 00:11:14,716
Lord Mombatten.
267
00:11:14,799 --> 00:11:17,677
I'm up for that big promotion
to Chief Warlord.
268
00:11:17,760 --> 00:11:20,263
Looks like we just have one sail down.
269
00:11:20,346 --> 00:11:21,514
That's not a sail!
270
00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:23,349
It's not? Then what is it?
271
00:11:23,433 --> 00:11:24,434
[grunts]
272
00:11:25,226 --> 00:11:27,103
Uh, ta-da!
273
00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:28,354
[table crashing]
274
00:11:28,438 --> 00:11:30,773
- [group gasping]
- [♪ dramatic music playing]
275
00:11:31,941 --> 00:11:34,694
We can still save the carving station!
276
00:11:34,777 --> 00:11:36,446
[shark chomping]
277
00:11:39,616 --> 00:11:40,700
Or not.
278
00:11:41,701 --> 00:11:43,119
[gasps] Beer.
279
00:11:43,203 --> 00:11:45,079
Poseidon has provided!
280
00:11:46,080 --> 00:11:47,081
[cork popping]
281
00:11:48,374 --> 00:11:50,835
Aw, man,
this bottle's all full of message.
282
00:11:50,919 --> 00:11:52,462
We're gonna starve to death.
283
00:11:52,545 --> 00:11:55,256
There's no food left in the entire world.
284
00:11:56,549 --> 00:11:59,135
And my boss is coming to dinner?
285
00:11:59,219 --> 00:12:02,931
[audience gasping, laughing]
286
00:12:03,014 --> 00:12:04,724
Boss ahoy!
287
00:12:04,807 --> 00:12:06,476
What am I gonna do?
288
00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:09,187
I'll never get promoted
if I can't serve a big dinner.
289
00:12:09,270 --> 00:12:10,271
[audience laughing]
290
00:12:10,355 --> 00:12:13,107
Problem solved.
We'll cook the Professor.
291
00:12:13,191 --> 00:12:15,151
He's conveniently dead.
292
00:12:15,235 --> 00:12:17,570
No, just napping face down.
293
00:12:17,654 --> 00:12:19,614
But I dreamed up an idea.
294
00:12:20,782 --> 00:12:22,867
If there was some way to descend
295
00:12:22,951 --> 00:12:24,786
to the ruins of the old world,
296
00:12:24,869 --> 00:12:27,956
we might find some canned
or waterlogged food.
297
00:12:28,039 --> 00:12:30,041
I've got it. I'll evolve gills!
298
00:12:30,124 --> 00:12:34,087
That would take millions of years
for a stupid mammal like you.
299
00:12:34,170 --> 00:12:36,589
No, we need a better idea.
300
00:12:36,673 --> 00:12:37,882
And I have one,
301
00:12:37,966 --> 00:12:40,593
because I'm a professor!
302
00:12:40,677 --> 00:12:43,888
[welder zapping]
303
00:12:44,722 --> 00:12:47,308
There! I've built a bathysphere.
304
00:12:47,392 --> 00:12:48,601
Oh yeah, baby!
305
00:12:48,685 --> 00:12:50,395
Bite my glass-bottom ass.
306
00:12:50,478 --> 00:12:51,479
[glass clinking]
307
00:12:51,562 --> 00:12:54,565
[♪ slow, suspenseful music playing]
308
00:12:57,819 --> 00:12:59,529
[both] Whoa.
309
00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:00,905
Whoa.
310
00:13:02,323 --> 00:13:05,243
[Professor] Ah, yes. Old New New York.
311
00:13:05,326 --> 00:13:08,162
The current has brought us
to Planet Express
312
00:13:08,246 --> 00:13:10,456
and its trove of snack foods.
313
00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:11,874
[metallic thudding]
314
00:13:11,958 --> 00:13:16,296
One of us will have to make
the perilous journey to the pantry,
315
00:13:16,379 --> 00:13:18,298
and the other one of us is me.
316
00:13:18,381 --> 00:13:20,800
Yeah. Actually, my hair just dried, so I--
317
00:13:20,883 --> 00:13:22,844
- [garbling]
- [mask snapping]
318
00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:24,012
Oh, don't worry.
319
00:13:24,095 --> 00:13:27,140
As long as you're breathing
through this flimsy hose,
320
00:13:27,223 --> 00:13:28,850
you won't die immediately.
321
00:13:28,933 --> 00:13:31,936
[♪ slow, dramatic music playing]
322
00:13:38,067 --> 00:13:39,819
[gasps] Jackpot!
323
00:13:39,902 --> 00:13:42,071
- [whirring]
- Oops, wrong button.
324
00:13:42,989 --> 00:13:46,159
- [hose snapping]
- [gurgled screaming]
325
00:13:46,242 --> 00:13:48,411
♪
326
00:13:48,494 --> 00:13:50,747
[bubbles popping]
327
00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:53,916
- Death bubbles. Not a good sign.
- [ship horn honking]
328
00:13:55,001 --> 00:13:59,088
- And my boss is here?
- [ship horn honking]
329
00:14:02,592 --> 00:14:04,302
[Leela] It's Lord Mombatten,
330
00:14:04,385 --> 00:14:06,929
and we have nothing to serve for dinner.
331
00:14:07,013 --> 00:14:09,432
- [water splashing]
- [♪ triumphant music playing]
332
00:14:09,515 --> 00:14:11,350
Did someone say "food"?
333
00:14:11,434 --> 00:14:12,894
No, I said "dinner."
334
00:14:12,977 --> 00:14:15,063
[gasps] Fry!
You're alive!
335
00:14:15,146 --> 00:14:16,856
Yes. Thank you for noticing.
336
00:14:16,939 --> 00:14:18,191
But more importantly,
337
00:14:18,274 --> 00:14:21,694
I come bearing forgotten
delicacies of old Earth.
338
00:14:21,778 --> 00:14:23,905
[♪ dramatic, theatrical music playing]
339
00:14:23,988 --> 00:14:25,323
Canned onions?
340
00:14:25,406 --> 00:14:27,617
Hey, it's the last food in the world.
341
00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:29,911
- There's a reason for that.
- [Bender grunting]
342
00:14:29,994 --> 00:14:33,372
I still don't understand how you survived.
343
00:14:33,456 --> 00:14:36,042
You went 20 minutes without air.
344
00:14:36,125 --> 00:14:38,002
I evolved gills. See?
345
00:14:38,086 --> 00:14:40,463
[floppy-lipped]
I know you said it was impossible,
346
00:14:40,546 --> 00:14:44,759
but sometimes science happens
if you just have faith.
347
00:14:45,093 --> 00:14:46,761
- [pan clanks]
- [flames whooshing]
348
00:14:46,844 --> 00:14:49,889
You better use all the spices
you've got, Ensign.
349
00:14:49,972 --> 00:14:52,892
Spices?
We're in the middle of the ocean, woman!
350
00:14:53,392 --> 00:14:56,312
Holding out on me, eh?
Mutiny!
351
00:14:56,395 --> 00:14:57,563
- [tape ripping]
- [Hermes screaming]
352
00:14:57,647 --> 00:14:59,148
[audience laughing]
353
00:14:59,232 --> 00:15:01,442
Ooh, this can looks a bit swollen.
354
00:15:01,526 --> 00:15:02,777
Could be botulism.
355
00:15:02,860 --> 00:15:05,071
What, are we trying for a Michelin Star?
356
00:15:05,154 --> 00:15:06,489
Cook it!
357
00:15:09,992 --> 00:15:12,995
- [♪ dramatic, suspenseful music playing]
- [boat engine rumbling]
358
00:15:14,747 --> 00:15:15,790
[Amy shrieks]
359
00:15:17,500 --> 00:15:18,876
Lord Mombatten.
360
00:15:18,960 --> 00:15:21,504
We're so glad you could
join us for dinner.
361
00:15:21,587 --> 00:15:23,631
I don't care if you're glad or dead.
362
00:15:23,714 --> 00:15:24,799
I just want the dinner.
363
00:15:24,882 --> 00:15:26,384
[pan sizzling]
364
00:15:26,467 --> 00:15:28,553
Mm. [chuckles] Mm!
365
00:15:28,636 --> 00:15:30,763
This onion curry is delicious,
366
00:15:30,847 --> 00:15:33,474
and it's smoothing my frown lines,
for some reason.
367
00:15:33,558 --> 00:15:35,226
Thank you, Captain Leela.
368
00:15:35,309 --> 00:15:38,187
You know, I've been considering you
for a big promotion to--
369
00:15:38,271 --> 00:15:40,982
- [choking and gagging]
- Chief Warlord?
370
00:15:41,065 --> 00:15:43,818
- A big promo-- [choking]
- I already know that part.
371
00:15:43,901 --> 00:15:46,737
[continues choking and gagging]
372
00:15:48,906 --> 00:15:50,741
Oh, no. I killed her!
373
00:15:50,825 --> 00:15:52,785
Now, she'll never promote me.
374
00:15:52,869 --> 00:15:55,246
On the bright side, we can eat her.
375
00:15:55,329 --> 00:15:57,081
- Anyone hungry for a Momwich?
- [audience laughing]
376
00:15:57,165 --> 00:16:00,042
When I said we were
having my boss for dinner,
377
00:16:00,126 --> 00:16:01,878
this isn't what I meant.
378
00:16:01,961 --> 00:16:03,504
[audience laughing]
379
00:16:03,588 --> 00:16:06,090
Well, everything worked out fine,
380
00:16:06,174 --> 00:16:08,634
except there's still a lot of gas
shooting outta my hose.
381
00:16:08,718 --> 00:16:13,097
- [hose hissing]
- [group shrieking]
382
00:16:13,764 --> 00:16:14,932
[flames whooshing]
383
00:16:16,017 --> 00:16:17,143
Don't panic.
384
00:16:17,226 --> 00:16:19,228
- [ship exploding]
- [water bubbling]
385
00:16:22,064 --> 00:16:23,107
[pirate] Don't panic!
386
00:16:23,191 --> 00:16:25,193
[ships exploding]
387
00:16:26,277 --> 00:16:29,447
Whoa.
That was the entire human race.
388
00:16:29,530 --> 00:16:31,949
So, I finally killed all humans?
389
00:16:32,033 --> 00:16:33,826
Ah, check that off the bucket list.
390
00:16:33,910 --> 00:16:36,287
Well, I guess that makes you
Chief Warlord, Leela.
391
00:16:36,370 --> 00:16:37,705
Where to?
392
00:16:37,788 --> 00:16:42,126
Legends speak of a tiny
speck of land that still exists,
393
00:16:42,210 --> 00:16:44,003
and there's only one map.
394
00:16:44,879 --> 00:16:46,631
[laughing] I got it on spring break.
395
00:16:46,714 --> 00:16:50,927
Looks like it'll be about
a three-hour tour.
396
00:16:51,010 --> 00:16:54,013
- [thunder crashing]
- [♪ lighthearted music playing]
397
00:16:56,349 --> 00:16:58,351
- [thunder crashing]
- [shrieking]
398
00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:03,189
[shrieking continues]
399
00:17:08,945 --> 00:17:10,947
[group grumbling]
400
00:17:12,323 --> 00:17:15,368
What's this weird water we're sitting on?
401
00:17:15,451 --> 00:17:16,994
[Bender gulping]
402
00:17:17,078 --> 00:17:18,496
[gagging, spitting]
403
00:17:18,579 --> 00:17:20,915
It's not water, it's the other thing.
404
00:17:20,998 --> 00:17:21,999
Land!
405
00:17:22,083 --> 00:17:23,626
We made it to dry land.
406
00:17:23,709 --> 00:17:25,044
[group cheering]
407
00:17:25,127 --> 00:17:26,837
[Zoidberg] Yum, sand fleas.
408
00:17:26,921 --> 00:17:30,383
Wait. How did a 5,000-foot glacier melt
409
00:17:30,466 --> 00:17:33,219
and raise sea level by 29,000 feet?
410
00:17:33,302 --> 00:17:35,346
- Science!
- 'Kay.
411
00:17:35,429 --> 00:17:38,015
So, who are we? And how'd we get here?
412
00:17:38,099 --> 00:17:39,475
I don't remember.
413
00:17:39,559 --> 00:17:41,269
We must have all hit our heads on that log
414
00:17:41,352 --> 00:17:43,563
- with seven dents in it.
- [audience laughing]
415
00:17:43,646 --> 00:17:46,315
If only there were a quick,
fun explanation
416
00:17:46,399 --> 00:17:47,900
we could hum along to.
417
00:17:47,984 --> 00:17:51,279
- [♪ lighthearted music playing]
- [thunder crashing]
418
00:17:51,362 --> 00:17:53,281
♪ The premise started getting rough ♪
419
00:17:53,364 --> 00:17:55,700
♪ The writers hit the sauce ♪
420
00:17:55,783 --> 00:17:57,451
♪ If not for a song
that explained it all ♪
421
00:17:57,535 --> 00:17:59,704
♪ The viewer would be lost ♪
422
00:17:59,787 --> 00:18:01,956
Okay. Listen carefully.
423
00:18:02,039 --> 00:18:03,708
{\an8}♪ With Phil Again ♪
424
00:18:03,791 --> 00:18:06,043
{\an8}♪ And his Cyclops friend ♪
425
00:18:06,127 --> 00:18:09,880
{\an8}♪ The Shmillionaire
and her beautiful Smizmar ♪
426
00:18:09,964 --> 00:18:12,216
{\an8}♪ The TV trope ♪
427
00:18:12,300 --> 00:18:14,552
{\an8}♪ Professor Dope ♪
428
00:18:14,635 --> 00:18:16,345
{\an8}♪ Simple farm girl Mary-Jane ♪
429
00:18:16,429 --> 00:18:19,473
{\an8}♪ And last and least, the rest ♪
430
00:18:19,557 --> 00:18:22,393
{\an8}The rest? Bite my rusty metal ass!
431
00:18:22,476 --> 00:18:25,271
{\an8}[♪ lighthearted music playing]
432
00:18:26,647 --> 00:18:29,233
Well, that explains everything,
433
00:18:29,317 --> 00:18:31,736
except those jaunty outfits
we were wearing.
434
00:18:31,819 --> 00:18:34,238
We must have gotten them
off those washed-up corpses.
435
00:18:34,322 --> 00:18:35,364
Ooh!
436
00:18:35,448 --> 00:18:36,991
It's like a cool thrift store
437
00:18:37,074 --> 00:18:39,368
that uses bones instead of hangers.
438
00:18:39,452 --> 00:18:40,745
[audience laughing]
439
00:18:40,828 --> 00:18:43,706
- [flies buzzing]
- Some of us are still alive.
440
00:18:43,789 --> 00:18:46,334
Alive and ravishing, darling.
441
00:18:46,417 --> 00:18:49,754
[snobbishly]
I say, it's my Smizmar, Kiffy.
442
00:18:49,837 --> 00:18:52,965
I don't suppose you saw
any butlers in that pile?
443
00:18:53,049 --> 00:18:54,175
Oh, plenty.
444
00:18:54,258 --> 00:18:56,844
But they're all either
dead or insubordinate.
445
00:18:56,927 --> 00:19:01,057
- [audience laughing]
- [♪ lighthearted music playing]
446
00:19:01,140 --> 00:19:03,809
Hmm.
I'll make the back door out of bamboo.
447
00:19:03,893 --> 00:19:06,062
We're all out of human femurs.
448
00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:07,688
[audience laughing]
449
00:19:07,772 --> 00:19:11,359
Is there anything better
than looking down on the riff-raff?
450
00:19:11,442 --> 00:19:13,069
Have you tried urinating?
451
00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:14,445
- [glasses clinking]
- [audience laughing]
452
00:19:14,528 --> 00:19:16,489
Well, let's search for food
453
00:19:16,572 --> 00:19:18,783
before we starve to death in agony.
454
00:19:18,866 --> 00:19:20,660
Uh, maybe we should have done that first.
455
00:19:20,743 --> 00:19:22,578
- [audience laughing]
- Come on, little buddy.
456
00:19:22,662 --> 00:19:23,704
You can't make me.
457
00:19:23,788 --> 00:19:25,873
You can't make me. You can't make--
458
00:19:25,956 --> 00:19:28,250
[shrieking and screaming]
Ooh! Ow, ow, ow!
459
00:19:28,334 --> 00:19:30,169
[♪ lighthearted music playing]
460
00:19:30,252 --> 00:19:31,879
Okay, we searched the island.
461
00:19:31,962 --> 00:19:34,965
I will now read the list
of all the food we found.
462
00:19:35,966 --> 00:19:37,218
One coconut.
463
00:19:38,761 --> 00:19:40,429
[audience laughing]
464
00:19:40,513 --> 00:19:41,806
- [coconut thuds]
- Ow!
465
00:19:41,889 --> 00:19:44,684
Castaways, I'm afraid
there's only one option.
466
00:19:44,767 --> 00:19:47,228
We'll have to eat each other one by one.
467
00:19:47,311 --> 00:19:50,189
[♪ slow, dramatic music playing]
468
00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:53,651
I'll go dress for dinner.
What should I wear?
469
00:19:53,734 --> 00:19:56,028
A dinner jacket, or herbs and butter?
470
00:19:56,112 --> 00:19:58,614
[audience laughing and applauding]
471
00:19:58,698 --> 00:19:59,907
- [coconut thuds]
- Ow!
472
00:20:01,117 --> 00:20:02,493
Two coconuts.
473
00:20:03,703 --> 00:20:05,371
[audience booing]
474
00:20:05,454 --> 00:20:06,580
- [coconut thuds]
- Ow!
475
00:20:08,999 --> 00:20:10,918
[♪ lighthearted music playing]
476
00:20:11,001 --> 00:20:13,003
[group moaning and chewing]
477
00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:15,923
[Amy belches]
478
00:20:16,006 --> 00:20:17,925
Zoidberg was a good friend.
479
00:20:18,008 --> 00:20:20,553
I'll always remember
his blood-curdling screams
480
00:20:20,636 --> 00:20:22,513
as we lowered him into the pot.
481
00:20:22,596 --> 00:20:24,014
[audience laughing]
482
00:20:24,098 --> 00:20:27,518
If I heard the lyrics correctly,
I'm a simple farm girl.
483
00:20:27,601 --> 00:20:31,147
But sometimes I wonder
if anyone else is alive
484
00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:33,149
on this big ol' wet planet.
485
00:20:33,232 --> 00:20:35,651
There's only one way to find out.
486
00:20:35,735 --> 00:20:37,027
Really? That's one more
487
00:20:37,111 --> 00:20:39,029
- than I thought there was.
- [audience laughing]
488
00:20:39,113 --> 00:20:41,824
I'm fairly certain I can make a radio
489
00:20:41,907 --> 00:20:43,409
out of this junk heap.
490
00:20:43,492 --> 00:20:44,952
Uh, I have a name.
491
00:20:45,035 --> 00:20:46,454
It's "The Rest."
492
00:20:46,537 --> 00:20:49,039
- [metallic squeaking]
- And... done!
493
00:20:50,583 --> 00:20:52,710
- Hey!
- Mayday! Mayday!
494
00:20:52,793 --> 00:20:55,129
Does anyone read me? Over.
495
00:20:55,212 --> 00:20:57,006
- [radio static]
- [Zapp Brannigan] I read you.
496
00:20:57,089 --> 00:20:59,258
This is famous astronaut Zapp Brannigan,
497
00:20:59,341 --> 00:21:01,218
talk-jaculating from orbit.
498
00:21:01,302 --> 00:21:02,344
It worked!
499
00:21:02,428 --> 00:21:04,180
[Zapp] After years in space,
500
00:21:04,263 --> 00:21:07,224
what a relief to hear
a gross old man's voice.
501
00:21:07,308 --> 00:21:09,810
Prepare for landing and the woodsy aroma
502
00:21:09,894 --> 00:21:11,854
of Paco Rabanne.
503
00:21:11,937 --> 00:21:13,856
[audience laughing]
504
00:21:14,440 --> 00:21:17,067
Da plane! Da plane!
[groans]
505
00:21:17,151 --> 00:21:18,319
[splashing]
506
00:21:20,070 --> 00:21:21,572
[hatch creaking]
507
00:21:21,655 --> 00:21:23,908
[group cheering]
508
00:21:23,991 --> 00:21:25,826
- [group applauding]
- Thank you. Thank you.
509
00:21:25,910 --> 00:21:27,244
I don't deserve this.
510
00:21:27,328 --> 00:21:28,579
I deserve much more.
511
00:21:29,622 --> 00:21:33,167
- [♪ sultry music playing]
- So, can you save us, big boy?
512
00:21:33,250 --> 00:21:34,251
Yes.
513
00:21:34,335 --> 00:21:35,795
Well, one of you anyway.
514
00:21:35,878 --> 00:21:38,798
It's an intimate space vehicle for two.
515
00:21:38,881 --> 00:21:42,092
Deciding who to save sounds so difficult.
516
00:21:43,093 --> 00:21:45,596
Oops! I accidentally bribed you
517
00:21:45,679 --> 00:21:48,140
with a gold timepiece full of cash.
518
00:21:48,224 --> 00:21:49,475
[audience laughing]
519
00:21:49,558 --> 00:21:51,602
Zapp Brannigan can't be bribed.
520
00:21:51,685 --> 00:21:54,688
I'm looking for meaningful
human companionship.
521
00:21:54,772 --> 00:21:56,690
Perhaps in those bushes over there.
522
00:21:56,774 --> 00:21:58,901
[shudders] The very idea!
523
00:21:58,984 --> 00:22:02,947
I could never sleep with someone
who has so little respect for my money.
524
00:22:03,030 --> 00:22:05,241
[audience laughing]
525
00:22:05,324 --> 00:22:07,618
Rest assured, I'll make my choice
526
00:22:07,701 --> 00:22:10,746
via a fair and demographic process.
527
00:22:10,830 --> 00:22:12,498
A beauty contest.
528
00:22:12,581 --> 00:22:15,209
- [♪ lighthearted music playing]
- [audience laughing]
529
00:22:16,252 --> 00:22:18,379
You mind kicking those
back to me, soldier?
530
00:22:18,462 --> 00:22:20,923
- [audience laughing]
- [♪ lighthearted music playing]
531
00:22:22,424 --> 00:22:25,427
I have made my decision,
and it wasn't easy,
532
00:22:25,511 --> 00:22:27,555
because you're all gorgeous.
533
00:22:27,638 --> 00:22:30,391
And because my contacts
burned up on reentry.
534
00:22:30,474 --> 00:22:32,184
[audience laughing]
535
00:22:32,268 --> 00:22:33,435
I choose you!
536
00:22:34,436 --> 00:22:35,521
Me?
537
00:22:35,604 --> 00:22:37,356
Oh my, oh dear.
538
00:22:37,439 --> 00:22:39,400
- No. [nervous muttering]
- [alarm chirping]
539
00:22:39,483 --> 00:22:42,486
[♪ soft music playing]
540
00:22:46,949 --> 00:22:49,201
[rocket zooming]
541
00:22:51,203 --> 00:22:52,913
[water splashing]
542
00:22:52,997 --> 00:22:53,998
[hatch creaking]
543
00:22:54,081 --> 00:22:55,624
There was nowhere to land!
544
00:22:55,708 --> 00:22:57,751
The entire Earth is covered with water.
545
00:22:57,835 --> 00:23:00,379
Duh! The ice caps melted five years ago.
546
00:23:00,462 --> 00:23:01,714
Everybody knows that.
547
00:23:01,797 --> 00:23:04,550
Not me. I've been in orbit for six years,
548
00:23:04,633 --> 00:23:07,761
and the windows were smeared
with chimp remains.
549
00:23:07,845 --> 00:23:08,846
Ugh.
550
00:23:08,929 --> 00:23:10,723
Then, I guess this is it.
551
00:23:10,806 --> 00:23:13,976
All that humanity built, gone.
552
00:23:14,059 --> 00:23:16,145
The end of love.
553
00:23:16,228 --> 00:23:17,980
The end of laughter.
554
00:23:18,063 --> 00:23:19,648
[audience laughing]
555
00:23:19,732 --> 00:23:22,735
The end of civilization.
556
00:23:22,818 --> 00:23:25,571
[♪ slow, somber music playing]
557
00:23:26,697 --> 00:23:28,699
[waves lapping]
558
00:23:31,410 --> 00:23:34,413
[♪ soft, triumphant music playing]
559
00:23:39,376 --> 00:23:40,753
[Professor] We were wrong!
560
00:23:40,836 --> 00:23:43,047
Civilization was reborn.
561
00:23:43,130 --> 00:23:46,383
And I regenerated
as a symbol of hope or something.
562
00:23:46,467 --> 00:23:49,136
Everything's just like it was before.
563
00:23:49,219 --> 00:23:51,513
Except now, we know a lot more
about the ocean.
564
00:23:51,597 --> 00:23:52,681
Indeed.
565
00:23:52,765 --> 00:23:56,393
Or as we now call it, the world.
566
00:23:56,477 --> 00:23:59,772
[audience laughing and applauding]
567
00:24:05,277 --> 00:24:07,279
♪