1
00:00:33,160 --> 00:00:34,460
So there it is, people.

2
00:00:34,530 --> 00:00:36,400
Due to budget cutbacks,

3
00:00:36,460 --> 00:00:39,260
we will no longer be offering
free squid guts in the kitchen.

4
00:00:43,140 --> 00:00:44,740
Oh, boo-hoo.

5
00:00:44,800 --> 00:00:46,770
Everyone, look
at my latest invention!

6
00:00:46,840 --> 00:00:48,470
Okay.

7
00:00:48,540 --> 00:00:50,780
I like how it's not
killing us so far.

8
00:00:50,840 --> 00:00:52,080
It takes any object

9
00:00:52,150 --> 00:00:54,750
and makes two smaller copies.

10
00:00:54,810 --> 00:00:57,720
Ooh! All right!
Why?

11
00:00:57,780 --> 00:00:59,890
You see, as I age,

12
00:00:59,950 --> 00:01:02,750
I've been shrinking
and feeling colder.

13
00:01:02,820 --> 00:01:05,220
So I now need twice
as many sweaters,

14
00:01:05,290 --> 00:01:07,090
in a smaller size.

15
00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:11,030
First I scan the old sweater.

16
00:01:11,100 --> 00:01:12,330
Then we add some matter.

17
00:01:12,400 --> 00:01:15,400
Any old useless matter will do.

18
00:01:18,170 --> 00:01:21,710
Now the matter prism
reorganizes the raw material

19
00:01:21,770 --> 00:01:24,010
into two smaller copies.

20
00:01:27,280 --> 00:01:29,350
So that's
where baby sweaters come from.

21
00:01:33,250 --> 00:01:34,820
Enclosed as a pdf attachment:

22
00:01:34,890 --> 00:01:38,290
A picture of yourself,
in a boat, on a river.

23
00:01:38,360 --> 00:01:40,330
It's a river that flows
in two directions.

24
00:01:40,390 --> 00:01:42,360
Make that three.

25
00:01:42,430 --> 00:01:44,400
It's a magic river, that's how.

26
00:01:44,460 --> 00:01:46,830
And it's flowing down
the eerie canal to...

27
00:01:46,900 --> 00:01:49,130
The scary door.

28
00:01:49,200 --> 00:01:51,900
That's "eerie" with two e's.

29
00:01:51,970 --> 00:01:55,310
Consider,
if you have the energy,

30
00:01:55,370 --> 00:01:58,610
Dr. Daniel zenus, an inventor
with a terminal case

31
00:01:58,680 --> 00:02:00,310
of "the lazies".

32
00:02:00,380 --> 00:02:02,550
This robot
will do everything for me.

33
00:02:02,620 --> 00:02:05,680
Robot, activate yourself
and do my research.

34
00:02:10,620 --> 00:02:12,420
Ah...

35
00:02:12,490 --> 00:02:15,630
Next,
assume my social obligations.

36
00:02:22,240 --> 00:02:24,340
Dr. Zenus,

37
00:02:24,400 --> 00:02:26,810
for a lifetime of
scientific achievement,

38
00:02:26,870 --> 00:02:28,710
we present this award to...

39
00:02:28,770 --> 00:02:30,640
Your robot.

40
00:02:30,710 --> 00:02:33,580
Daddy, I love you.

41
00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:39,280
If only I'd programmed the robot

42
00:02:39,350 --> 00:02:41,490
to be more careful
what I wished for.

43
00:02:41,550 --> 00:02:44,520
Robot, experience
this tragic irony for me.

44
00:02:44,590 --> 00:02:49,030
No!

45
00:02:50,760 --> 00:02:52,100
Ah...

46
00:02:52,170 --> 00:02:54,370
Ah...

47
00:02:54,430 --> 00:02:56,500
Man, I wish we had
a robot to do stuff.

48
00:02:56,570 --> 00:02:57,700
I know, right?

49
00:02:59,370 --> 00:03:01,710
Bender, thank god I
found you in time.

50
00:03:01,770 --> 00:03:04,040
I need someone
in the lab immediately,

51
00:03:04,110 --> 00:03:06,110
to fold my new sweaters.

52
00:03:06,180 --> 00:03:09,550
I'm sorry, do you see a robot
in this room named "folder"?

53
00:03:11,450 --> 00:03:15,620
Oh, fortunately, I came prepared
with a back-up phrasing.

54
00:03:15,690 --> 00:03:19,260
Bender, would you mind
"bending" my new sweaters?

55
00:03:19,330 --> 00:03:21,690
There's only two of them.
Wait. Oh.

56
00:03:21,760 --> 00:03:24,530
You want me to do two things?
Man, I'd call my lawyer

57
00:03:24,600 --> 00:03:28,170
if dialing a phone
wasn't such a hassle.

58
00:03:28,230 --> 00:03:31,000
Razza frazza two things.

59
00:03:31,070 --> 00:03:33,610
Ooh. Razza frazza duplicator.

60
00:03:36,480 --> 00:03:38,310
Now for some tasty matter.

61
00:03:49,220 --> 00:03:51,260
Howdy, fellas.
I'm Bender.

62
00:03:51,320 --> 00:03:53,190
Go to hell, old man!

63
00:03:53,260 --> 00:03:55,330
I like your attitude.
Let's party.

64
00:03:55,390 --> 00:03:57,330
But first,
fold these two sweaters.

65
00:03:57,400 --> 00:03:59,660
I'm sorry, do you see a robot

66
00:03:59,730 --> 00:04:02,000
in this room named "folder"?

67
00:04:03,570 --> 00:04:04,770
Damn, you're cute.

68
00:04:38,700 --> 00:04:41,670
Hi. I'm Bender.
This is my robot Bender,

69
00:04:41,740 --> 00:04:43,380
and this is
my other robot Bender.

70
00:04:43,440 --> 00:04:44,440
Oh, lord.

71
00:04:44,510 --> 00:04:45,640
They're 60%

72
00:04:45,710 --> 00:04:47,550
scale replicas of me, Bender.

73
00:04:47,610 --> 00:04:50,520
Does that mean they only do
60% of the work you do,

74
00:04:50,580 --> 00:04:52,520
or that they actually
do more work

75
00:04:52,590 --> 00:04:54,550
because they're
only 60% as lazy?

76
00:04:56,360 --> 00:04:57,520
Shut up.

77
00:04:58,720 --> 00:04:59,760
That's a good one.

78
00:04:59,830 --> 00:05:01,690
Enough good ones, everyone.

79
00:05:01,760 --> 00:05:04,730
We have a delivery to
an alien space giant.

80
00:05:04,800 --> 00:05:06,200
You'll have to be respectful.

81
00:05:06,270 --> 00:05:08,070
This customer is 50 feet tall

82
00:05:08,130 --> 00:05:09,546
and sensitive
about his appearance.

83
00:05:09,570 --> 00:05:13,200
Colossal tooth whitener,
mega deodorant,

84
00:05:13,270 --> 00:05:15,270
humungous acne cream...

85
00:05:15,340 --> 00:05:18,180
Aw, and one
regular-sized condom.

86
00:05:18,240 --> 00:05:20,310
All that and a small wiener?

87
00:05:20,380 --> 00:05:22,310
This guy's got it goin' on!

88
00:05:35,530 --> 00:05:38,830
Remember, don't show
any reaction to his appearance.

89
00:05:43,170 --> 00:05:45,400
I hope that's vanishing cream,

90
00:05:45,470 --> 00:05:46,740
'cause that needs to go away.

91
00:05:47,970 --> 00:05:49,070
Oh, that's cold-blooded!

92
00:05:49,140 --> 00:05:50,410
Shh.

93
00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:52,610
It's okay. I understand.

94
00:05:52,680 --> 00:05:54,750
My unusual appearance
makes people nervous.

95
00:05:54,810 --> 00:05:56,650
You used humor to
defuse the tension.

96
00:05:56,720 --> 00:05:58,650
Yep, and there's still
a little more tension.

97
00:05:58,720 --> 00:05:59,820
So look out!

98
00:06:01,190 --> 00:06:03,050
You so ugly,
when trick-or-treaters come

99
00:06:03,120 --> 00:06:05,060
to your house,
they give you candy.

100
00:06:05,120 --> 00:06:07,230
You so ugly,
when you go to the bank,

101
00:06:07,290 --> 00:06:09,630
they ask you
to put on a ski mask!

102
00:06:09,700 --> 00:06:12,900
You so ugly, you cracked
the daily mirror.

103
00:06:12,970 --> 00:06:14,500
It's a newspaper!

104
00:06:16,100 --> 00:06:17,500
I wish it weren't so,

105
00:06:17,570 --> 00:06:19,600
but many of these things
are true.

106
00:06:19,670 --> 00:06:21,910
Anyhow, you've lowered
my self-esteem a bit more,

107
00:06:21,970 --> 00:06:24,380
but I'm sincerely grateful
you came all this way

108
00:06:24,440 --> 00:06:25,780
to deliver my fungus chisel.

109
00:06:25,840 --> 00:06:26,940
Don't feel bad, sir.

110
00:06:27,010 --> 00:06:28,480
It's not your fault.

111
00:06:28,550 --> 00:06:30,720
You probably just
inherited your appearance

112
00:06:30,780 --> 00:06:32,350
from your mother.
What?!

113
00:06:32,420 --> 00:06:34,650
No one insults my mama!

114
00:06:51,200 --> 00:06:52,740
Oh, god, shield your eyes!

115
00:06:52,810 --> 00:06:54,970
It's like Edward
James Olmos on Imax!

116
00:07:01,750 --> 00:07:04,150
Did you see his face
when I said he so ugly?

117
00:07:04,220 --> 00:07:06,920
No, I blacked out,
'cause he so ugly!

118
00:07:08,620 --> 00:07:11,620
Hey guys, quit reminiscing
and grab me two cigars.

119
00:07:11,690 --> 00:07:13,020
One thing each?

120
00:07:13,090 --> 00:07:14,290
Sounds fair.

121
00:07:14,360 --> 00:07:16,360
Wait, make that four cigars.

122
00:07:16,430 --> 00:07:19,100
You want us to do four things?

123
00:07:25,640 --> 00:07:27,070
My manwich!

124
00:07:29,780 --> 00:07:31,610
What's up, shorty?

125
00:07:31,680 --> 00:07:34,580
And that's the story
of how one of me became two,

126
00:07:34,650 --> 00:07:37,180
and two became four,
making seven total.

127
00:07:37,250 --> 00:07:38,550
The end.

128
00:07:40,790 --> 00:07:42,590
I just like having
the end locker.

129
00:07:42,660 --> 00:07:44,660
It's not like Amy cares
about it at all.

130
00:07:44,720 --> 00:07:47,060
But no, she won't trade with me.

131
00:07:47,130 --> 00:07:49,490
A rat!
Yes, she is a rat.

132
00:07:49,560 --> 00:07:51,230
No, look!

133
00:07:51,300 --> 00:07:53,400
Which way to the tiny hookers?

134
00:07:55,370 --> 00:07:57,200
A big, fat roach!

135
00:07:57,270 --> 00:07:58,616
What? I thought
I put that away.

136
00:07:58,640 --> 00:08:01,040
No, there!

137
00:08:01,110 --> 00:08:03,010
Who are you?

138
00:08:03,080 --> 00:08:05,080
Bender sent me.

139
00:08:11,430 --> 00:08:12,940
Hey, I know that guy.

140
00:08:20,020 --> 00:08:24,230
Scruffy, what is that tiny
Bender doing in my soup?

141
00:08:24,290 --> 00:08:27,430
It appears to be giving
you the finger, sir. Enjoy.

142
00:08:27,590 --> 00:08:30,640
Help me, help me! I'm too lazy to escape!

143
00:08:45,820 --> 00:08:47,750
What?

144
00:08:47,820 --> 00:08:49,820
This place
is crawling with you's!

145
00:08:49,890 --> 00:08:51,690
So there's more Benders around.

146
00:08:51,760 --> 00:08:54,120
As far as I'm concerned,
that's good news.

147
00:08:54,190 --> 00:08:55,790
Bad news, everyone.

148
00:08:55,860 --> 00:08:58,830
Look at this infinite series
representing the mass

149
00:08:58,900 --> 00:09:01,130
of successive
generations of Benders.

150
00:09:05,670 --> 00:09:07,740
Don't wait for me.

151
00:09:07,800 --> 00:09:09,770
It's non-convergent!

152
00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:11,570
Oh, dip!

153
00:09:11,640 --> 00:09:13,480
Unless we quickly
exterminate them,

154
00:09:13,540 --> 00:09:15,640
they'll replicate ad infinitum

155
00:09:15,710 --> 00:09:18,480
and consume
all the matter on earth.

156
00:09:19,980 --> 00:09:21,750
According to my calculations,

157
00:09:21,820 --> 00:09:24,190
there are 11 generations
at the moment.

158
00:09:24,250 --> 00:09:28,120
That's 2,046 total Benders
we need to destroy.

159
00:09:28,190 --> 00:09:29,890
Wait, does that include me?

160
00:09:36,730 --> 00:09:39,100
Too bad he didn't
have his own bible.

161
00:09:39,170 --> 00:09:42,500
Just 2,045 more to go.

162
00:10:19,110 --> 00:10:21,980
2,045.2,046!

163
00:10:22,050 --> 00:10:24,280
That's it. We got 'em all,
except for the big one.

164
00:10:24,350 --> 00:10:27,050
Wait, this isn't a real Bender.

165
00:10:27,120 --> 00:10:30,020
It's a talking doll from
when Bender had that sitcom

166
00:10:30,090 --> 00:10:32,750
about the city robot
who moves back to the farm.

167
00:10:32,820 --> 00:10:34,990
Shut your pumpkin, bumpkin.

168
00:10:37,260 --> 00:10:40,100
All right, so I let
one measly Bender get away.

169
00:10:40,160 --> 00:10:43,900
How much harm can one infinitely
self-reproducing robot do?

170
00:10:43,970 --> 00:10:46,940
Bender! How could you be
so lazy and irresponsible?

171
00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:48,140
Hey. What?

172
00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:50,670
Did someone say I'm great?

173
00:10:53,980 --> 00:10:55,940
What's with the grey goo?

174
00:10:56,010 --> 00:10:59,150
Bite my tiny metal ass!

175
00:10:59,220 --> 00:11:02,080
Hey, those jerklings
ate my couch.

176
00:11:02,150 --> 00:11:03,550
Oh, god!

177
00:11:03,620 --> 00:11:05,190
We've opened Pandora's fly.

178
00:11:05,260 --> 00:11:07,190
They'll reproduce without limit,

179
00:11:07,260 --> 00:11:09,590
consuming all the
matter in the world!

180
00:11:09,660 --> 00:11:12,260
Like the Kardashians.

181
00:11:15,100 --> 00:11:16,900
Now they drank my booze?!

182
00:11:16,970 --> 00:11:18,830
They've gone too far!

183
00:11:18,900 --> 00:11:20,300
Wait a second.

184
00:11:20,370 --> 00:11:21,846
All Benders are
powered by alcohol!

185
00:11:21,870 --> 00:11:23,640
Of course.

186
00:11:23,710 --> 00:11:25,910
Long before the Benders
devour the earth,

187
00:11:25,980 --> 00:11:28,840
they'll deplete the
planet's booze and die off.

188
00:11:28,910 --> 00:11:31,680
This is a problem that
will solve itself.

189
00:11:31,750 --> 00:11:33,350
A problem that solves itself?

190
00:11:33,420 --> 00:11:36,050
That sounds like a job
for me, Bender.

191
00:11:39,690 --> 00:11:41,260
Our top story.

192
00:11:41,320 --> 00:11:44,560
All alcohol on earth
has mysteriously disappeared.

193
00:11:44,630 --> 00:11:46,360
Consequences are minimal,

194
00:11:46,430 --> 00:11:48,530
except among
the most hardened alcoholics.

195
00:11:48,600 --> 00:11:50,070
Linda?

196
00:11:50,130 --> 00:11:53,470
I can no longer
face my children!

197
00:11:55,240 --> 00:11:56,840
Crisis averted.

198
00:11:56,910 --> 00:11:59,170
Without alcohol, the
Benders are dying off.

199
00:12:04,280 --> 00:12:06,750
A greater tragedy
my eyes have never beheld.

200
00:12:06,820 --> 00:12:09,080
Well, into the toilet.

201
00:12:13,260 --> 00:12:16,230
So sober, so weak.

202
00:12:16,290 --> 00:12:19,290
Things really worked
out nicely this time.

203
00:12:24,870 --> 00:12:27,870
This doesn't taste
like old-man water.

204
00:12:27,940 --> 00:12:31,010
Everyone to the situation room!

205
00:12:31,070 --> 00:12:33,240
I was lying here snoozing,

206
00:12:33,310 --> 00:12:37,010
dreaming, oddly enough,
about bathing in champagne

207
00:12:37,080 --> 00:12:39,850
with six of the world's
most distinguished scientists,

208
00:12:39,920 --> 00:12:42,020
when suddenly, I realized

209
00:12:42,090 --> 00:12:45,150
my bathwater had been
transformed into alcohol.

210
00:12:45,220 --> 00:12:47,920
Alcohol?

211
00:12:47,990 --> 00:12:49,520
Hoo-wee!

212
00:12:51,930 --> 00:12:53,900
Chug, chug, chug, chug!

213
00:12:53,960 --> 00:12:56,160
Chug, chug, chug, chug, chug!

214
00:12:56,230 --> 00:12:58,030
Mmm.

215
00:12:58,100 --> 00:13:02,070
It's like fine cognac
with a hint of aged scrotum.

216
00:13:02,140 --> 00:13:03,840
How can this be?

217
00:13:03,910 --> 00:13:06,740
I thought the Benders drank
all the alcohol in the world.

218
00:13:06,810 --> 00:13:09,210
They did,
but then they made more!

219
00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:13,950
You see, once the Benders
reached atomic scale,

220
00:13:14,020 --> 00:13:17,790
they began directly manipulating
water and co2 molecules

221
00:13:17,850 --> 00:13:20,290
to make alcohol.

222
00:13:23,230 --> 00:13:24,890
In a matter of hours,

223
00:13:24,960 --> 00:13:28,300
there will be no more
fresh water on earth.

224
00:13:29,340 --> 00:13:30,350
Oh, no!

225
00:13:30,520 --> 00:13:32,560
What will I mix with my scotch?

226
00:13:38,740 --> 00:13:41,140
Hey, you!

227
00:13:41,740 --> 00:13:43,240
Good evening.

228
00:13:43,310 --> 00:13:44,640
Who are you calling drunk?

229
00:13:44,710 --> 00:13:46,110
You're not drunk.
I'm drunk.

230
00:13:46,180 --> 00:13:47,810
That's right, Linda.

231
00:13:47,880 --> 00:13:50,480
Water is now... now booze,

232
00:13:50,550 --> 00:13:53,520
and everyone's tiddy much
protally fit-shaced.

233
00:13:54,620 --> 00:13:59,190
Turning to sports,
the Indy 500 was today.

234
00:13:59,260 --> 00:14:01,290
There were no survivors.

235
00:14:03,360 --> 00:14:06,200
This chair is so comfortable.

236
00:14:07,940 --> 00:14:10,200
Classic Amy.

237
00:14:10,270 --> 00:14:12,170
You want to see a
picture of my boy?

238
00:14:12,240 --> 00:14:13,840
Sure.

239
00:14:13,910 --> 00:14:16,280
That's your penis.

240
00:14:16,340 --> 00:14:17,940
That's my boy.

241
00:14:18,010 --> 00:14:20,850
I guess this
isn't... n-not so bad.

242
00:14:20,910 --> 00:14:23,320
As long as we don't need
to use our mental...

243
00:14:23,380 --> 00:14:25,120
Mental...

244
00:14:25,190 --> 00:14:26,090
Minds?

245
00:14:26,150 --> 00:14:27,650
What?

246
00:14:37,260 --> 00:14:38,970
No, listen.

247
00:14:39,030 --> 00:14:41,400
I... freaking
love you.

248
00:14:41,470 --> 00:14:43,140
And I don't throw
that word around.

249
00:14:43,200 --> 00:14:44,740
I know you don't.

250
00:14:44,810 --> 00:14:47,040
That's why I love you.

251
00:14:47,110 --> 00:14:49,140
Are the pizza muffins ready?

252
00:14:52,410 --> 00:14:54,450
He's here for
revenging, that's why!

253
00:14:54,520 --> 00:14:57,220
No! Wait!
I'm here to apologize.

254
00:14:57,280 --> 00:14:58,890
For your looks?

255
00:14:58,950 --> 00:15:01,520
Nice one.

256
00:15:01,590 --> 00:15:04,120
Well, yes, actually,
it is sort of related to that.

257
00:15:04,190 --> 00:15:05,560
Can we talk?

258
00:15:05,630 --> 00:15:08,130
Grabbing your spaceship
was not okay.

259
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:11,460
I- I lost my cool, and I'm sorry.

260
00:15:11,530 --> 00:15:14,330
In group, I learned
that I tend to be a bit...

261
00:15:14,400 --> 00:15:15,900
Repulsive?

262
00:15:15,970 --> 00:15:17,500
Sensitive.

263
00:15:17,570 --> 00:15:20,110
So now i'm, like,
trying to work on my attitude,

264
00:15:20,170 --> 00:15:22,310
and project an air
of positivity.

265
00:15:22,380 --> 00:15:23,989
You're projecting an air
of something.

266
00:15:24,040 --> 00:15:26,110
Phew!

267
00:15:26,180 --> 00:15:30,080
You're so stinky, you need right
guard and left guard.

268
00:15:30,150 --> 00:15:32,250
I'll take your hygiene advice
to heart.

269
00:15:32,320 --> 00:15:33,820
You're ugly!

270
00:15:36,590 --> 00:15:38,020
Hey! Ow!

271
00:15:38,090 --> 00:15:39,790
Yo, freak show!

272
00:15:39,860 --> 00:15:43,360
Your face has been declared
a weapon of mass disgusting.

273
00:15:44,200 --> 00:15:45,500
Timeless.

274
00:15:45,570 --> 00:15:47,330
Okay, deep breath, deep breath.

275
00:15:53,240 --> 00:15:54,940
Dr. Lesterman?

276
00:15:55,010 --> 00:15:57,110
I'm sorry to bother you,
but I think I'm close

277
00:15:57,180 --> 00:15:58,640
to a temper-control incident.

278
00:15:58,710 --> 00:16:00,380
You have reached the office

279
00:16:00,450 --> 00:16:02,950
of Dr. Judy lesterman
and Dr. Ira rothkiss.

280
00:16:03,020 --> 00:16:04,380
The office is now closed.

281
00:16:04,450 --> 00:16:06,850
If this is a pharmacy calling...

282
00:16:09,960 --> 00:16:12,830
That's it! I promised myself
I wouldn't do this, but I...

283
00:16:15,300 --> 00:16:18,100
I will destroy you all!

284
00:16:18,170 --> 00:16:20,800
I won't stop until
your whole planet is as ugly

285
00:16:20,870 --> 00:16:23,340
as you perceive me to be!

286
00:16:23,400 --> 00:16:25,940
That will take a very long time.

287
00:16:27,010 --> 00:16:29,310
Okay. Stop! Stop!

288
00:16:33,310 --> 00:16:34,780
Stupid...

289
00:16:36,780 --> 00:16:38,080
Ah.

290
00:16:38,150 --> 00:16:39,720
Blender,

291
00:16:39,790 --> 00:16:41,350
you're the only one who's sober.

292
00:16:41,420 --> 00:16:43,460
You got to do something!

293
00:16:43,520 --> 00:16:45,490
Haven't I done enough already?

294
00:16:45,560 --> 00:16:47,460
Please, stop the monster.

295
00:16:47,530 --> 00:16:49,560
Just do that one thing!

296
00:16:49,630 --> 00:16:52,000
Make it zero, and you got a deal.

297
00:16:52,070 --> 00:16:54,870
What if I foldeded the
Professor's sweaters for you?

298
00:16:54,940 --> 00:16:56,900
Both of them?

299
00:16:56,970 --> 00:17:00,270
You mean you'll do two things,
and I only have to do one thing?

300
00:17:00,340 --> 00:17:02,510
Yeah. Just save the world.

301
00:17:02,580 --> 00:17:05,310
Sucker.

302
00:17:07,350 --> 00:17:10,220
Legion of Benders, come unto me!

303
00:17:10,280 --> 00:17:12,790
We have one thing to do.

304
00:17:12,850 --> 00:17:14,120
Screw that!

305
00:17:14,190 --> 00:17:15,820
Ah, come on, you lazy jerks!

306
00:17:15,890 --> 00:17:17,490
If we all pitch in,

307
00:17:17,560 --> 00:17:20,260
we each only have to do one
quintillionth of a thing.

308
00:17:20,330 --> 00:17:22,400
All right.

309
00:17:44,220 --> 00:17:48,750
Big Bender starts right now.

310
00:17:52,390 --> 00:17:54,990
Get a shave, ugly!

311
00:17:55,060 --> 00:17:56,430
Oh.

312
00:18:02,070 --> 00:18:04,200
How about some
aftershave, dumpy?

313
00:18:04,270 --> 00:18:06,140
You big bully!

314
00:18:06,210 --> 00:18:09,740
You ugly nerd, enjoy a nice
Guggenheim swirly!

315
00:18:18,190 --> 00:18:20,120
Let this beating be a lesson

316
00:18:20,190 --> 00:18:23,390
about never attacking those
more handsome than oneself.

317
00:18:23,460 --> 00:18:26,790
All I wanted was to
apologize to you people.

318
00:18:26,860 --> 00:18:29,530
But now I have to kill you.

319
00:18:29,600 --> 00:18:32,370
How, by making me look at you?

320
00:18:32,430 --> 00:18:34,900
No. By making you
look at... my mama!

321
00:18:36,170 --> 00:18:37,970
Your mama's so ugly!

322
00:18:38,040 --> 00:18:40,740
I told you not to
talk about my mama!

323
00:19:00,190 --> 00:19:03,100
Walk toward the light, Bender.

324
00:19:03,160 --> 00:19:05,430
Aw, man, do I have to walk?

325
00:19:05,500 --> 00:19:09,470
No!

326
00:19:12,340 --> 00:19:14,370
Huh? Huh?

327
00:19:18,780 --> 00:19:23,050
No!

328
00:19:23,120 --> 00:19:25,450
At last... I'm beautiful!

329
00:19:25,520 --> 00:19:29,390
Yeah, if you're into gray dust.

330
00:19:31,660 --> 00:19:33,830
Bender, you di' it!

331
00:19:33,890 --> 00:19:36,200
No, we di' it.

332
00:19:36,260 --> 00:19:39,170
Ladies and gentlemen,
if together we were able

333
00:19:39,230 --> 00:19:41,570
to defeat
this giant space monster,

334
00:19:41,640 --> 00:19:44,070
think how also
we might defeat the monsters

335
00:19:44,140 --> 00:19:47,440
of poverty and disease
and unliteracy.

336
00:19:47,510 --> 00:19:50,210
In this spirit,
I ask my fellow Benders

337
00:19:50,280 --> 00:19:52,080
to join me in working
diligently to...

338
00:19:52,150 --> 00:19:53,310
Boo!

339
00:19:53,380 --> 00:19:55,280
Go to hell!

340
00:19:55,350 --> 00:19:58,220
Come on, let's go someplace
where we don't have

341
00:19:58,290 --> 00:20:00,690
to do one quintillionth
of a thing all the time.

342
00:20:14,200 --> 00:20:16,140
Well, that was dumb.

343
00:20:21,040 --> 00:20:23,840
Man, were we drunk.

344
00:20:23,910 --> 00:20:26,010
What happened, Professor?

345
00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:29,150
Something absolutely incredible!

346
00:20:29,220 --> 00:20:31,250
The sweaters got folded!

347
00:20:31,320 --> 00:20:33,750
But how?

348
00:20:33,820 --> 00:20:35,290
I didn't do it.

349
00:20:35,360 --> 00:20:37,920
Bender, did you learn a lesson
about not being lazy

350
00:20:37,990 --> 00:20:40,330
while the rest of us were bombed
out of our gourds?

351
00:20:40,390 --> 00:20:41,860
Maybe I did, Fry.

352
00:20:41,930 --> 00:20:43,530
Maybe I did.

353
00:20:43,600 --> 00:20:46,430
Or maybe I rescued
one last mini-Bender

354
00:20:46,500 --> 00:20:49,070
to fold stupid, ugly sweaters
while I laughed at him.

355
00:20:50,600 --> 00:20:53,210
I guess we'll never know.