Interesting.
Are you okay in there?
I don't remember having morning sickness this bad with Wyatt.
Oh, honey, that sucks.
I'm just going over some pictures here,
trying to educate myself before I go to Phoebe's reunion.
Todd Marks. I wonder if he's still even alive.
Alive? What kind of school did she go to anyway?
Not a bad one, actually.
It's just that Phoebe tended to hang out with the bad-boy crowd.
You know, anything to piss off Grams.
-Was he her first love? -More like first lust.
Talk about crazy, though.
Rick Gittridge. He was kind of the leader of their little gang.
-Phoebe was in a gang? -Not the drive-by kind.
But he was kind of the type.
If he's at the reunion, I'd stay away from him.
This is so weird.
It's a whole different side of Miss Phoebe.
I think she missed Mom in her life more than Prue or I did.
And the more Grams tried to control her, the more she became rebellious.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
-What happened? -What happened?
The dry cleaner ruined my dress for tonight, that's what happened.
Phoebe, you know better than to scream in this house
if there isn't a demon.
I'm sorry, but what am I supposed to wear to the reunion tonight?
How about some prison stripes?
You told her about the shoplifting?
-You little thief. -No, I acted out.
Now, back to what I'm supposed to wear tonight.
I know, why don't you try your little black suit,
the one with the thigh slit? Sexy, yet successful.
No, I think black is too threatening. I'll be in my closet.
-Chris, hi. -Hey.
Look, I need your help. I think I got scabbers on my tail.
Oh, well, I have some hydrogen peroxide in my bathroom.
No, scabber demons.
I went undercover to follow a lead on who turns Wyatt,
but I think they're on to me.
I need a cloaking spell, just in case. Is the Book in the attic?
Yeah, the last I saw.
Want me to help you?
-He hates me. -No, he doesn't.
Yeah, he does.
He's just distracted, that's all, by, you know, imminent death.
That's no excuse.
I mean, he's been avoiding me for weeks. He won't even look at me.
What could I have done in the future that would be so bad?
Maybe he should have a father-son talk.
No, I can't do that to Leo.
He had a hard enough time letting go.
Besides, he doesn't know I'm pregnant.
I know, but don't boys need their...?
I know, and that's why I called my father,
so he could figure out why his surly new grandson hates me.
I got you.
Guys, how about this one?
Okay.
I remember this poem.
Those who mock who I am Let them always remember when
-Hi. -Piper.
-Honey, good to see you. -Good to see you.
All of you. Look, you're pregnant.
Yeah, it looks that way, huh?
When did this happen?
Oh, well, you know, I've been meaning to call you, but, you know...
Leo is the father.
Leo? I thought you guys split up.
We did.
Well, then how did...?
I don't understand.
He was dying and I was crying...
It's all very complicated.
So, Leo, he's... moved on?
Yeah, but I'm happy for him. He really wanted to go.
-He wanted to die? -No, no, no. He's not dead.
He's just up there being a full-time elder.
He doesn't know about this?
No, no, not yet.
Did I mention this was all very complicated?
The point is, he's not around.
-Was he ever? -Were you?
-Sorry. -No, no, no, I deserve that.
I wasn't around enough for you girls.
But...
I want to make up for that with Wyatt and his little...
It's a boy. Chris, actually.
Chris? Why did you choose that name?
I don't know and he won't tell me.
He's very secretive about the future.
He's actually the reason I asked you to come.
See, he hates me
and he doesn't want to talk to me, and I need you to find out why.
I don't understand your Wiccan ways.
But I'll try.
Hello, Chris. Chris?
Hello, Chris. Can you hear me?
Someone calling me?
Yeah. Sweetie, could you come here a sec?
Jeez, he can come out?
Can we hurry this up because I gotta get...
Grandpa.
Okay, Paige, I should warn you.
There's gonna be a lot of people in there that used to hate me.
They're not gonna hate you.
San Francisco reads your paper every day and they love you.
I never dropped smoke bombs on San Francisco.
Pep rallies, I hated them.
All right. Well, after we're done tonight,
they're gonna rename the gym just for you.
Come on, conquering hero.
Phoebe.
-Hi. Wow, you look great. -Really? Thanks.
-Well, see you inside. -Yeah. That would be great.
-Who was that? -I have no idea.
Well, I didn't expect to see you here, Miss Halliwell.
Still testing the boundaries of the criminal justice system, are we?
Hi, Miss Hickock. No, actually, I'm a columnist now.
I give advice.
On relationships.
I'm sorry, dear.
I just never figured you for the advice-giving type.
You certainly never took it.
Enjoy.
Gym teacher?
How did you know she was a gym teacher?
All right, lady, let's go in there.
-Show your sordid past a thing or two. -Yes.
Oh, my God, everybody's looking at me.
Yeah, that's because you're a celebrity
and you look fabulous and they probably all want to be you.
Nice try. I'm an empath, I feel hate.
Phoebe. Phoebe Halliwell. I can't believe you showed up.
-Ramona. Hi. -You're so skinny.
How'd you stay so skinny? Who's this?
I'm Paige Matthews, her long lost sister.
Oh, wow, are you famous too?
You look famous. Okay, so,
dweeb time, but, since I knew you when, can I have your autograph?
Oh, yeah, of course. I usually charge $20 for it.
I think I have a 20 here somewhere.
No, I'm kidding.
I used to do everything Phoebe said.
Remember that night when you snuck me into the country club
in the trunk of your car?
And then you left me there
so that you could go make out with Todd on the golf course?
Yeah, I'm sorry about that.
Actually, I'm sorry about a lot of the tricks we used to play on you.
Tricks?
You made me feel like part of the gang.
Those were the best times of my life.
So I think you need to tell me more about this gang.
What else did she do?
One time she broke into the principal's office,
just to make out with some guy on his desk.
See, now, I remember that it was you that broke into the principal's office
and I just tagged along out of curiosity.
-Where's Paula? -She's around, somewhere.
This is so awesome.
It's like the gang's all back together again. Well, almost.
Oh, yeah. Where's the ringleader?
Rick, good old Rick. Where is Rick?
I heard he got picked up for a liquor-store robbery.
Oh, my God, are you kidding? Did he do it?
I only know what I read in your paper and I read everything you write.
Thanks. I'm flattered.
-So, what are you doing now? -I'm a personal-injury lawyer.
That sounds interesting.
Well, it's not.
But it's legal, just barely.
It pays the mortgage.
I miss the fun we used to have.
Yeah, me too.
Todd. There you are, sweetie.
Oh, and there you are.
I was wondering if you had the nerve to show up.
-What do you mean, "nerve"? -Oh, you're the talk of the reunion.
You know, you can fool San Francisco with your pithy advice,
but you can't fool us.
We all know you, sweetie.
-That's enough. -What does that mean?
It means you're a fake.
The only thing you were ever known for
was lying and ditching and stealing boyfriends.
Phoebe, are you gonna let somebody
with a giant helmet that passes for hair talk to you like that?
God, Paula, just because Todd had a thing for Phoebe,
you don't have to be so mean.
I'm not being mean, I'm doing her a favor.
To the rest of the world, you might be "Ask Phoebe,"
but to us, you'll always be Freebie.
You okay?
Hey.
Let's dance.
Hey, why didn't you just tell that chick to go screw herself?
Phoebe?
Okay, what just happened?
-You tell me. -I have no idea.
I was just standing here, and then I had some weird high school flashback.
Yeah, your whole body just flashed back.
What, are you kidding me?
-I just felt... -Pissed?
-Very. -Well, as someone who's seen Carrie,
both versions, I'd say the reunion is over.
So we're close?
Yeah. You're awesome, Grandpa.
Did you hear that?
-Awesome. -Yeah, after the event happened,
-we got really close. -What event?
-I can't tell you. -Is this event my fault?
Is that why you're treating me like a nonperson?
I can't talk about it, it'll mess with the future.
But you did say I was awesome, right? You can talk about that?
Yeah. You're the best. I love hanging out with you.
I gotta admit, I'm a little surprised. I mean,
it's no secret I wasn't the greatest dad.
It means a lot to me that I could do something to make up for it.
-You do. -After the event.
-Right. -That you won't tell me about.
-I told you. I can't talk about it, okay? -Hey.
Don't talk to your mother like that, okay?
You're right.
I'm sorry.
Piper?
Hey, what's going on?
-Hi, Daddy. -Hi, sweetie.
Okay, I hate to cut this reunion short.
I think you've had enough of those for today.
You go upstairs till we figure this out.
Bye, Daddy.
What happened?
Well, you've heard of recapturing your youth.
I think Phoebe's youth is trying to capture her.
-Explain. -I don't know.
One minute she was normal. The next, it's like she's Freaky Phoebe.
-Great, who else saw? -No one.
She changed back before anyone noticed.
I'm having a little trouble keeping up here.
Phoebe's being chased by what, demons?
Maybe inner demons or a spell gone wrong.
It seemed to happen after
someone named Paula Marks called her "Freebie."
Oh, yeah, that'll do it.
You want to go upstairs and check the Book, see if there's anything?
-Okay. -You two go ahead.
I need to get back to the scabber demons before they know I'm missing.
Hey, wait. What, and leave your awesome grandpa alone?
Grab a sandwich, grab a beer, get an answer.
Cubans?
I am not that person anymore.
I am not, so whatever you think you're doing or...
What is happening to me?
Hello? This is Phoebe, I think.
Hey. Where did you go? Are you okay?
Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm fine.
Listen, I'm sorry about Paula.
It always burned her up. You know, you and me together.
-Yeah. Hey, listen... -You know, the only reason I came
to this thing was because of you.
Hoping I'd see you again.
-You there? -Yeah.
I need to ask you a question.
Was I really a...
A different person when you knew me?
Different?
-How do you mean? -You know, what Paula said.
Phoebe, we were kids.
You know, we were young, we were dumb,
we didn't let anything stand in our way.
Yeah, I remember.
I don't know about you, but I miss it.
When was the last time you were wild? You know, really wild?
-The way we used to be. -Actually,
-quite recently, to tell you the truth. -Who is that? Who are you talking to?
Is this Freebie?
You bet your ass. And I'm coming to get you, bitch.
Sorry, bad idea.
It's cool. It's just... It's strong.
I was just trying to help us bond a little, you know.
We don't need help, we're cool.
In the future. But I haven't been there yet, you know.
I'm feeling a little out of sync here.
Well, you hungry? Do you want to grab a bite?
Yeah, yeah, that would be great. Just...
-Let me change first, okay? -Okay.
Listen. About those things,
you might want to pick up a different habit,
to avoid any future problems, if you know what I mean.
Oh, gee.
Thanks for the tip.
Phoebe.
Phoebe?
When you said you were feeling wild, you weren't kidding.
What happened? Your hair, your clothes...
Oh, my God!
Get off him.
This isn't high school, Phoebe.
They are married now.
And what the hell are you thinking?
No, no, no. Let her go.
Todd's a personal-injury attorney and I have a hundred witnesses here.
I'm sure "Ask Freebie" has very deep pockets.
Yeah, well, I'd rather be rich than a bitch.
What the hell was that?
I have no idea, but that was so cool.
The past is the future And the future is the past
Let's welcome back The senior class
-Now, that's more like it. -Come on.
Oh, my God.
I haven't felt this way since...
Homecoming game, underneath the bleachers.
Yeah, the crowd cheering.
How did you make this happen?
Magic.
-I think I'm a witch. -A witch, huh?
How come I'm not scared of you?
Because you're under my spell.
Phoebe?
-Hello? -Okay, I found Phoebe.
I have good news and I have bad news.
-Give me the good. -Well,
I now know what Phoebe was like as a teenager.
-That's also the bad news. -How bad is it?
In a word...
...bad.
Let's get out of here.
Phoebe?
Phoebe.
Hey, wait for me.
-So where are we going, guys? -Anywhere.
I don't care. I just don't want this night to end.
The night is young.
I can't get busted.
Don't worry, I'm gonna get us out of here.
You want to steal a cop car?
Not steal, borrow.
Yeah, great idea. Let's go.
Phoebe!
What is the "gigot"?
The gigot is your choice, leg of Iamb or mouton.
Mutton.
What is that, meat?
Yes, meat. It comes from a sheep, you know.
Why don't you just bring us a couple of steaks, please.
Medium. Thank you.
Sorry, I thought you might like a fancy meal.
Why?
Trying to live up to my rep.
With cigars and mouton?
Sorry, Grandpa, that's not how you did it.
-Did I take you to the batting cages? -No.
-Strip clubs? -God, no.
What did I do?
You gotta tell me because I am crashing here.
Nothing, you just...
We talked.
Look, we should just get back.
I'm undercover with demons who'll be looking for me.
No, no, no. Wait. Let's talk.
We need to talk.
Piper asked you here to find out what's wrong with me, right?
She just wants to know why she's such a terrible mother.
She what? No, no.
She's great.
Well, then why are you treating her like she doesn't exist?
Chris.
If what we do is talk...
...talk to me.
Because she doesn't exist in my future, okay?
She dies when I turn 14.
That's the event?
How?
I can't, all right. I've already said way too much.
The point is,
after I save Wyatt, I have to go back to where she isn't.
I can't get close to her, because I don't want to lose her again.
Maybe that's all the more reason to get close to her.
Proving once again that we are smarter than the cops.
Can I play with the siren now?
No, I'm cleaning the fingerprints. We've gotta ditch the car here.
Hey, what's the rush?
The coast is clear, the night is young, and so are you.
Guys, I'm not gonna crawl in the trunk again so you two can make out.
Hey, we could TP Gabby Fernandez's house, how about that?
-How about lame? -Yeah, I have to agree.
This is a special night.
We need imagination.
Hey, Rick always said he had imagination.
That's exactly what I was thinking.
This is reunion night.
Let's get the gang back together.
Yeah, but Rick's locked up in county.
-So? -So the jail's closed.
Well, just think of me as your get-into-jail-free card.
-You want to break in? -Just to say hi.
It's something to do, right?
Right.
Damn it, I thought I had her. She's on the move again.
Well, we better find her soon because we're gonna need her
if those scabber demons come after Chris.
I can't believe I let him go out with Dad. What was I thinking?
Honey, you weren't thinking.
You were actually feeling, which is allowed in this family.
You're okay.
Who says I'm okay?
Don't worry, you'll get used to orbing in the future.
I thought something might have happened.
No, we're fine. We just talked.
Really, I'm fine.
Yeah. Well, Phoebe's not. She's out running around with her old gang.
-She's not downstairs? -No, she's out the window.
Even worse, she's under the influence.
-Of alcohol? -No, adolescence.
She stole a cop car as a prank.
That's not a prank, it's a felony.
Well, teen Phoebe also happens to have her adult powers
and she cast a spell on her entire reunion class.
-What? -Don't worry.
Paige was able to reverse it all, but...
Hey, hey.
-Are you okay? -Yeah, I'm just a little lightheaded.
Sorry.
You know, about me.
Must have been some hell of a talk there.
Yeah.
Better get off your feet, honey. Come on.
We need to stop Phoebe
before she gets into some trouble that we can't get her out of.
I'm trying. She keeps moving, she keeps moving.
I got her.
Glass.
Get back.
Icky stuff.
"Icky stuff"?
It worked.
Here.
Sorry about all this.
It's okay, kids are messy.
-They'll be back. -And we'll handle it.
Any idea how we're gonna find Phoebe now?
You're not my lawyers.
Well, Mr. Gittridge, we're here at the request of your public defender.
-May I call you "Rick"? -No.
You don't look like much of a defense team to me.
Sit down, Gittridge.
Mr. Gittridge,
did you at one time provide
Phoebe Halliwell with a smoke bomb during a school assembly?
All right, what is this?
Hey, stay away from me.
Jeez...
Chill out, Rick. It's us.
-We just came by to say hi. -Hi.
What the hell's going on? How did you guys do that?
Wait, are you crazy or just stupid?
-No, tell me how you did that. -It's Phoebe.
She does things like magic. But for real.
We'll see how real.
This isn't supposed to happen. It's a prank.
We just came to say hi.
You want me to use my magic to get you out of here?
Oh, I know you are.
Only way you're getting out of here too.
In for a penny, in for a pound.
Let's go.
All clear.
Sweet.
What is this? Is this a spell or something?
Or something.
I never believed in much of anything before, but I am a believer now.
Whatever, have a good life. Come on, you guys.
No, wait, wait. Don't get all attitudinal on me.
It's not like we did anything wrong here, guys.
Rick, you hit a cop.
That was an accident.
You guys had me so freaked out with that magic trick,
I didn't know what was going on.
He does have a point, Phoebe.
-Yeah. -Don't buy into his crap.
He made us break him out of prison.
That was justice. You guys, I never hit no liquor store.
I mean, I was in the wrong place at the wrong time.
You expect us to believe that?
I'm being straight with you.
You guys, you know me.
Yeah, I'm a troublemaker, I'm not an armed robber.
-Could have fooled me. -I grabbed the shotgun
to scare you, okay.
I was desperate to get out of there, to be with you guys.
I'm one of you.
-What do you think, Phoebe? -He's capable of hurting people.
That's what I think.
I vote we let him stick with us.
Just doesn't seem right to leave him out.
That's two out of three, babe.
Guess we're all back together again. Isn't this great?
The crystals should protect you.
They won't be able to find you as long as you stay in the attic.
You sure about that?
Well, I'm pretty sure.
Okay. Well, you and Wyatt need to go someplace safe.
-I'm gonna go get him. -No, you're not leaving this room.
-What about you? -What about me?
I have to stay here and help Paige summon Phoebe.
I'm part witch, remember? I can help Paige do that.
You can't vanquish the demons if they come and attack again.
-Well, I can try. -Listen to your mother, Chris.
What if something happens to her?
Nothing's gonna happen to me.
Unless you know something that I don't.
Nothing's gonna happen to you, honey.
Not now.
So when?
Chris?
Is that what you've been living with,
knowing that something happens to me?
I see.
Well, does it happen soon?
I can't tell you that.
It could change the future in even worse ways.
Right.
But isn't that why you came here in the first place?
To make the future better?
How do you know you haven't already changed mine?
She's got a point.
Well, whatever it is, it obviously doesn't happen until you're born,
so save it, got it?
I got it, Mom.
And then, while I keep Miss Hickock busy on the telephone,
you three creep up to her house and egg her car.
I haven't egged a car in years. I get first shot.
Pull it together.
You're acting like you're still in high school.
Because they are. I cast a spell.
Okay, that explains so much.
Listen, I picked up a tip today in lockup,
and I got a better idea what we can do tonight.
Knock off another liquor store?
No.
An armored car.
You're joking, right?
No, he's not joking. He's psycho, look at him.
You're wrong. Look, I would have never even considered it before.
But we got magic now, right?
I mean, we can pull this off.
An armored car, huh?
A little bit big league, don't you think?
That's right, we're not kids anymore. We gotta think about our futures.
What do you say? Ramona, you in?
I don't know.
I don't want to go to jail.
Listen, we're not gonna get caught. We got Phoebe, all right.
Now, we need a majority vote here. So, what do you say?
No.
I want to go home.
You're not going anywhere.
In for a penny, in for a pound, remember?
The cops aren't after us, they're after you.
She's right.
Come on, guys, let's get out of here.
It's over.
Nothing's over until I say it's over.
What's going...? What are you doing?
I kill demons every day. You think I'm afraid of you?
Stay right there.
Honey, you okay?
No, I'm not. You have to send me back.
You're not a teenager anymore.
Very good, Paige. Now, please, send me back.
We need the power of three
to vanquish the demons that are after Chris.
No, it's gonna have to wait. There are innocents in danger.
-Well, what if you revert back? -I won't.
Look, there's a crazy man with a shotgun. Now, please send me back.
Todd. Todd!
-Are you okay? -You go to the cops?
No, I didn't. I swear.
-Where's Ramona? -Somewhere safe.
-What is that supposed to mean? -I got nervous when you took off.
I didn't know where you went, so I decided I need a little leverage.
-Where is she? -Don't take a tone with me, Pheebs.
All right? Not if you wanna see your friend again.
She's locked up tight. Now, if you want her to keep breathing,
you're gonna do what I say.
Don't you just love reunions?
They should be passing by any minute. You stop up there.
You don't have to do this. You have a choice.
A choice? Here's my choice.
Freedom with money to burn or life in prison.
You won't get life.
Maybe not, but I'll get 30 to 40 years.
That robbery was my third strike.
So you did do it?
Yeah. But you knew that.
Even before you got all grown up.
Don't do this, Rick.
Don't make things worse than they are. Tell me where Ramona is.
When I get what I want, she'll go free.
Except guys like you never get what they want.
Well, not for lack of trying, that's for damn sure.
I got a feeling this time it's gonna be different.
I've got magic on my side.
-God, what happened to you? -Me?
What happened to you? You're the one who changed.
You got all... different.
Yeah, I did.
Go.
We're gonna do this just like I said,
then you're gonna give me a new face.
And not one of them lawyer faces you used. Something new.
Or Ramona dies. Are we clear?
Okay.
Go, go, go.
I can't guarantee a perfect spell, you know.
What do you mean? I saw you do magic.
No, you saw a hormonal teenage witch with no fear of consequences.
Leave the consequences to me.
Go, now.
Make them see what cannot be Flames that leap to make them flee
Oh, my God, he's on fire.
-Wasn't that the idea? -No.
It was just supposed to be an illusion.
Now, it wouldn't be the first time I kill someone.
Let's get the money.
Make him hear what isn't there
His deepest worries come to bear
Damn it. Where'd they come from?
I think your time's running out.
Let's go, let's go.
Come on.
I wish I was asleep.
You should sleep.
No, I can't.
Not until Phoebe's back and Chris' demons are vanquished
and I accept the fact that apparently I die young.
You know, don't you?
When it happens?
It's like you said.
The future could have changed.
I do know that Chris loves you.
-Yeah? -Yeah.
I love you too.
Wait here. Wyatt's force field will protect you.
You stay put. I'm gonna take care of it, okay?
Just keep Chris in the attic.
Okay, no more stalling.
-Do it. -Where's Ramona?
You think I'm stupid?
I tell you where she is, I lose my leverage.
-What's going on? -Who are you?
Don't, she's my sister.
Yeah?
She a witch too?
Yeah, you could say it runs in the family.
Good. Then maybe she can give me a new face.
We'd be more than happy to give you a new face
once you tell us where Ramona is.
What the hell. You're my leverage now, anyway.
She's locked in a tank under the pumping station.
How do we know you're telling the truth?
You don't. Now, my face. Make it different.
Heartbreaking, charming, young.
You know, I'm thinking maybe you should use our nephew for inspiration.
Who you were, you're now another
Take the face of Wyatt's brother
Yeah. I like it. This will work.
Phoebes, watch out. This could get messy.
You okay?
Yeah.
You know you had to, right?
I know.
-Hey. -Hi.
How are Todd and Ramona?
They're shaky, but they're okay.
Yeah? Do they remember anything?
No. Once I reversed the spell, the past was...
-Forgotten? -Some things are best forgotten.
Yeah, like Freaky Phoebe?
My God, I was such an angry little teenager, huh?
It's good you didn't have your powers back then.
Tell me about it. I'm just glad that's all behind me, you know.
Still, it's good for me to see you have a couple of chinks in your armor.
As an older sister, you're quite a bit to live up to.
-Shut up. -I swear, dude.
-Get out of here. -I'm telling the truth.
I'm all embarrassed now.
Next time I ask you to drop by,
I promise I will keep the demonic drama to a minimum.
Yeah, now you know why I don't come around that often.
-Dad. -Just kidding... sort of.
Take care of yourself. You got a great kid growing inside of you.
I look forward to really getting to know him.
I still can't believe you like orbing in the future.
-Do I live to see that? -Oh, nice try.
Don't worry so much about the future.
Spend time with him while you can, talk to him.
Every moment counts, is that it?
Yeah. Something like that.
Piper...
...be careful.
That's nice. What else do we have in here?
Look, it's a racecar. Do you see it?