1 00:00:48,465 --> 00:00:49,925 In New York City, 2 00:00:50,008 --> 00:00:52,886 where no good event gets going before 9:00 pm, 3 00:00:52,970 --> 00:00:54,304 it's a very bad sign 4 00:00:54,388 --> 00:00:58,058 when you get invited to something that starts at 9:00 a.m. 5 00:00:59,851 --> 00:01:01,228 What're you gonna say? 6 00:01:01,311 --> 00:01:03,814 I'm just gonna tell them that before 10:00 a.m., 7 00:01:03,897 --> 00:01:06,149 as far as I'm concerned, everybody's guilty. 8 00:01:06,233 --> 00:01:08,735 -I figure I'll be out in no time. 9 00:01:08,819 --> 00:01:09,987 Well, as long as I'm down here 10 00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:12,698 I'm gonna head over to J&R to look at some computer shit. 11 00:01:12,781 --> 00:01:14,908 When you get off, call me. We'll meet up, do something. 12 00:01:14,992 --> 00:01:17,411 Well, aren't you gonna write today? 13 00:01:17,578 --> 00:01:18,620 What does that mean? 14 00:01:18,704 --> 00:01:21,123 It doesn't mean anything. It was just a question. 15 00:01:21,206 --> 00:01:23,041 What did you think I was gonna do? 16 00:01:23,125 --> 00:01:25,002 Sit on my ass all day and slack off? 17 00:01:25,085 --> 00:01:27,504 No. I didn't mean it like that. 18 00:01:29,548 --> 00:01:31,091 Look, it's early. 19 00:01:32,259 --> 00:01:34,052 Right. It's early. 20 00:01:34,136 --> 00:01:35,762 And it's also a very bad sign 21 00:01:35,846 --> 00:01:39,182 when a couple is fighting before 9:00 a.m. 22 00:01:39,266 --> 00:01:42,519 You know what we need right now? A Hollywood kiss. 23 00:01:42,603 --> 00:01:45,397 Here? We have coffee. 24 00:01:48,734 --> 00:01:51,111 Come on. Hollywood kiss. 25 00:01:56,658 --> 00:01:57,659 Better? 26 00:01:58,660 --> 00:01:59,953 Better. 27 00:02:02,414 --> 00:02:03,749 I'll see ya later. Love you. 28 00:02:03,832 --> 00:02:05,459 I love you, too. Wish me luck. 29 00:02:07,210 --> 00:02:08,587 Hang 'em high. 30 00:02:13,925 --> 00:02:15,969 Hi. I hope you can help me with this. 31 00:02:16,053 --> 00:02:20,057 I feel terrible, but I don't think that I can serve jury duty today. 32 00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:23,560 You see, I work for myself as a freelance writer 33 00:02:23,644 --> 00:02:25,646 and no one can cover for me. 34 00:02:28,899 --> 00:02:30,567 Welcome to jury duty. 35 00:02:34,529 --> 00:02:38,867 Meanwhile, another woman was having trouble juggling her duties. 36 00:02:38,950 --> 00:02:42,287 -Oh, is it 8:30 already? -Good morning. 37 00:02:42,371 --> 00:02:43,664 Fuck! 38 00:02:44,331 --> 00:02:45,582 Don't say F. 39 00:02:45,666 --> 00:02:49,961 I'm, uh... I'm gonna be a little late tonight, 40 00:02:50,045 --> 00:02:51,797 -work stuff. - Yeah, come here, baby. 41 00:02:51,880 --> 00:02:53,882 Yes, darling. Oops. Turn around. 42 00:02:53,965 --> 00:02:55,300 -Oh... 43 00:02:55,384 --> 00:02:57,135 It's okay, Brady. 44 00:02:57,219 --> 00:02:59,388 Mommy's just gotta go to work. 45 00:02:59,471 --> 00:03:01,223 -Boy is fine. 46 00:03:01,306 --> 00:03:04,810 He just misses mama. Yes, baby. 47 00:03:07,062 --> 00:03:09,439 Oh, look at that, yes. 48 00:03:09,523 --> 00:03:10,607 Say bye-bye. 49 00:03:10,691 --> 00:03:12,192 Bye-bye, Mommy. 50 00:03:12,275 --> 00:03:13,318 No, no, it's nothing... 51 00:03:13,402 --> 00:03:15,696 -Bye-bye, Brady. - No, no. It's all right... 52 00:03:15,779 --> 00:03:17,239 Along with her coffee, 53 00:03:17,322 --> 00:03:20,659 feeling guilty had become a part of Miranda's daily routine. 54 00:03:22,285 --> 00:03:23,662 Let me help you, darling. 55 00:03:23,745 --> 00:03:24,955 Thanks, Lenore. 56 00:03:25,288 --> 00:03:28,500 You have done such a wonderful job with this event. 57 00:03:28,583 --> 00:03:30,460 -Macaroons on the outside, dear. -Oh. 58 00:03:30,544 --> 00:03:32,170 -I just hope people enjoy it. -Oh. 59 00:03:32,254 --> 00:03:34,256 I'm sure they will. 60 00:03:34,339 --> 00:03:36,508 Charlotte had been guilted into joining 61 00:03:36,591 --> 00:03:38,468 the Synagogue's Sisterhood Society. 62 00:03:38,552 --> 00:03:41,972 Now, I know since Harry... pah-pah-pah... 63 00:03:42,347 --> 00:03:44,057 you've been coming to Temple alone. 64 00:03:44,141 --> 00:03:46,309 The break-up was bad news for you. 65 00:03:46,393 --> 00:03:50,647 But, good news for me. Hence, good news for you. 66 00:03:50,731 --> 00:03:53,275 Lenore, what are you saying over there? 67 00:03:53,775 --> 00:03:55,652 I have someone for you. 68 00:03:55,736 --> 00:03:58,864 Now, I know, I don't look old enough to have a son your age, 69 00:03:58,947 --> 00:04:00,157 but I do. 70 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:02,451 -Mmm... -Charlotte, darling. 71 00:04:02,534 --> 00:04:06,204 I have two single sons, both perfect for you. 72 00:04:06,288 --> 00:04:08,582 Uh-uh-uh, Barbara, I told you. 73 00:04:08,665 --> 00:04:10,500 I wanted to fix her up with my David. 74 00:04:12,294 --> 00:04:14,546 Charlotte may have been there to arrange the cookies, 75 00:04:14,629 --> 00:04:18,717 but Barbara, Elaine and Lenore were there to arrange her next marriage. 76 00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:21,678 Meanwhile, Samantha had used her pushiness 77 00:04:21,762 --> 00:04:25,015 to parlay her new man's hit off-Broadway show 78 00:04:25,098 --> 00:04:27,392 into a hot on-Broadway poster. 79 00:04:27,476 --> 00:04:28,852 Fuck me. 80 00:04:28,935 --> 00:04:30,854 Well, that's the first thing every woman in town 81 00:04:30,937 --> 00:04:32,606 will be saying after she sees it. 82 00:04:32,689 --> 00:04:33,899 It's huge. 83 00:04:33,982 --> 00:04:35,567 And that's the second. 84 00:04:35,776 --> 00:04:39,279 And honey, I'm not even sure the poster does you justice. 85 00:04:39,362 --> 00:04:42,032 Come on, my dick's like three stories long. 86 00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:45,160 The way God and Madison Avenue intended. 87 00:04:47,704 --> 00:04:50,248 Sometimes, when you're sitting on a jury, 88 00:04:50,332 --> 00:04:53,919 it may seem as if all you're doing is a lot of waiting around, 89 00:04:54,002 --> 00:04:55,879 but to the contrary. 90 00:04:55,962 --> 00:04:57,798 The catalyst for the resolution of the lawsuit 91 00:04:57,881 --> 00:05:00,926 is the fact that you were there, ready to hear the evidence 92 00:05:01,009 --> 00:05:02,177 and render a verdict. 93 00:05:02,260 --> 00:05:04,471 You are not just sitting around, 94 00:05:04,554 --> 00:05:09,100 but rather playing an indispensable role in our justice system. 95 00:05:09,184 --> 00:05:12,729 But now, let's take a look at the flow of a typical trial. 96 00:05:12,813 --> 00:05:15,899 Whether you're serving on a civil or criminal trial, 97 00:05:15,982 --> 00:05:18,068 there's a general procedure that is followed. 98 00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:21,488 You may hear opening statements by the opposing attorneys 99 00:05:21,571 --> 00:05:24,074 each presenting their sides of the dispute, 100 00:05:24,157 --> 00:05:26,535 this is not evidence... 101 00:05:26,618 --> 00:05:27,953 It's just so weird. 102 00:05:28,036 --> 00:05:31,081 I mean, a mango isn't even a fruit you can bite into. 103 00:05:31,164 --> 00:05:35,544 I do believe it is the oddest thing you can pull out of a briefcase. 104 00:05:35,627 --> 00:05:37,504 -Except for a pineapple. -Oh. 105 00:05:37,587 --> 00:05:39,130 The moment he pulls out a pineapple, 106 00:05:39,214 --> 00:05:40,882 -I want you to call me. -Okay. 107 00:05:41,550 --> 00:05:42,551 Thank you. 108 00:05:44,219 --> 00:05:45,762 Ooh. 109 00:05:45,846 --> 00:05:47,556 Charlotte! What are you doing here? 110 00:05:47,639 --> 00:05:48,890 Shh! 111 00:05:49,766 --> 00:05:51,017 Why are we hiding? 112 00:05:51,101 --> 00:05:53,061 I am on the worst date of my life. 113 00:05:53,144 --> 00:05:55,647 Oh, honey, I'm so sorry. 114 00:05:55,730 --> 00:05:58,900 This woman from the temple set me up with her son and he's awful. 115 00:05:58,984 --> 00:06:00,193 You have to help me. 116 00:06:00,277 --> 00:06:02,320 -Okay. - Call me on your cell phone, 117 00:06:02,404 --> 00:06:05,282 tell me something bad happened and then I'll rush out. 118 00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:06,575 Okay, then when the guy leaves, we'll call you, 119 00:06:06,658 --> 00:06:07,659 you'll come back and eat with us. 120 00:06:07,742 --> 00:06:09,119 -Yes! Okay! -Okay. 121 00:06:11,913 --> 00:06:15,083 We've been dating a long time. We have contingency plans. 122 00:06:20,297 --> 00:06:22,465 Uh, I asked for more bread, 123 00:06:22,549 --> 00:06:24,259 but they haven't brought it yet. 124 00:06:26,011 --> 00:06:26,970 Okay. 125 00:06:30,765 --> 00:06:33,059 Oh, I'm sorry, I wouldn't normally get that, 126 00:06:33,143 --> 00:06:35,395 but maybe something bad happened. 127 00:06:38,148 --> 00:06:39,232 -Hello? -Hey, Charlotte, 128 00:06:39,316 --> 00:06:40,317 it's me, something bad happened. 129 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:42,360 Something bad happened? 130 00:06:43,987 --> 00:06:45,405 I knew it was gonna be terrible. 131 00:06:45,488 --> 00:06:47,240 The man brought me carnations! 132 00:06:47,324 --> 00:06:48,825 -I see. -Wait, hold up. 133 00:06:48,909 --> 00:06:52,162 The man brought you flowers. What an asshole. 134 00:06:52,287 --> 00:06:53,955 Not flowers, carnations! 135 00:06:54,039 --> 00:06:55,373 What's so wrong with carnations? 136 00:06:55,457 --> 00:06:57,083 They're filler flowers. 137 00:06:57,167 --> 00:06:58,960 Would you dump a guy if he brought you carnations? 138 00:06:59,044 --> 00:07:01,421 Me? No, but I happen to like carnations, 139 00:07:01,504 --> 00:07:02,464 especially the pink ones. 140 00:07:02,547 --> 00:07:04,674 In fact, I think they're making a comeback. 141 00:07:04,758 --> 00:07:07,385 I would, however, throw away a guy for wearing docksiders, 142 00:07:07,469 --> 00:07:08,929 or topsiders, or any of the above. 143 00:07:09,012 --> 00:07:10,680 No, those are cute. 144 00:07:10,764 --> 00:07:12,974 So basically guys are just fucked? 145 00:07:13,058 --> 00:07:14,184 No, that's not true. 146 00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:16,019 None of that matters with the right guy. 147 00:07:16,102 --> 00:07:19,230 Harry was bald and he talked with his mouth full. 148 00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:21,358 But I loved him anyway. 149 00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:23,360 Right, because he didn't bring you filler flowers. 150 00:07:23,443 --> 00:07:25,946 No, because I loved him. 151 00:07:26,029 --> 00:07:28,448 Of course you did, sweetie. Don't say that to her. 152 00:07:29,157 --> 00:07:31,242 I'm sorry, I was just trying to be funny. 153 00:07:31,326 --> 00:07:32,744 Well, it wasn't funny. 154 00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:35,497 Yeah, it wasn't funny, I'm a slacker, 155 00:07:35,580 --> 00:07:38,667 I guess if I were wearing topsiders I wouldn't be here. 156 00:07:40,543 --> 00:07:42,921 Good evening. You folks ready to order? 157 00:07:43,004 --> 00:07:44,547 Um, yes... 158 00:07:44,631 --> 00:07:47,884 Let's see, I'm gonna start with the goat cheese salad 159 00:07:47,968 --> 00:07:49,386 and then I'll have the tuna. 160 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:53,348 But, sir, can you make sure there's no parsley on anything? 161 00:07:53,431 --> 00:07:54,557 I'm just really allergic. 162 00:07:54,641 --> 00:07:56,434 Not even a sprinkling of it on the plate. 163 00:07:56,518 --> 00:07:59,062 -Yeah, he got it, no parsley. -And, can... 164 00:07:59,145 --> 00:08:01,314 Actually, can... can you ask the chef 165 00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:03,483 if the marinade for the tuna has parsley in it? 166 00:08:03,566 --> 00:08:05,902 Because if it does, I should probably change my order. 167 00:08:05,986 --> 00:08:07,529 -I'll go check. -Thank you. 168 00:08:08,154 --> 00:08:09,155 You're not allergic. 169 00:08:09,864 --> 00:08:11,449 -What? -You're not allergic. 170 00:08:11,533 --> 00:08:12,617 I don't like it. 171 00:08:12,701 --> 00:08:13,827 Why don't you just say that? 172 00:08:13,910 --> 00:08:15,453 Because when I say that, 173 00:08:15,537 --> 00:08:18,289 parsley somehow magically appears on the plate 174 00:08:18,373 --> 00:08:20,792 and I feel bad because I have to send it back. 175 00:08:20,875 --> 00:08:23,586 You didn't even order something that usually comes with parsley. 176 00:08:23,670 --> 00:08:25,130 It comes with everything. 177 00:08:25,213 --> 00:08:26,965 You know what, guys, I actually have to... 178 00:08:27,048 --> 00:08:29,050 I... I totally forgot, I... 179 00:08:29,134 --> 00:08:31,970 I have to... go. 180 00:08:32,053 --> 00:08:33,763 Bye. 181 00:08:33,847 --> 00:08:38,059 Charlotte decided to leave her second bad date of the night. 182 00:08:43,481 --> 00:08:48,445 You can just drop us at the corner of 73rd and Madison. Thanks. 183 00:08:48,528 --> 00:08:50,447 Well, actually can you go around? 184 00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:53,825 It's 73rd between Park and Madison, thank you. 185 00:08:55,201 --> 00:08:56,661 I'm in heels. 186 00:09:01,583 --> 00:09:04,377 I can't believe you put me down in front of your friend. 187 00:09:05,045 --> 00:09:06,588 I didn't put you down. 188 00:09:06,671 --> 00:09:08,465 Okay, great... 189 00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:10,675 Now you're gonna tell me what I feel? 190 00:09:10,759 --> 00:09:12,677 I'm not telling you what you feel. 191 00:09:12,761 --> 00:09:14,888 Ah... here we go again. 192 00:09:17,265 --> 00:09:18,600 What's going on with us? 193 00:09:20,226 --> 00:09:22,145 When did you stop being on my side? 194 00:09:22,687 --> 00:09:24,647 When did you stop being on my side? 195 00:09:32,739 --> 00:09:33,948 This isn't working. 196 00:09:34,032 --> 00:09:36,534 You're right, I think we should take a break. 197 00:09:37,118 --> 00:09:38,203 Are you serious? 198 00:09:38,286 --> 00:09:40,080 I think we need some time apart. 199 00:09:40,622 --> 00:09:43,291 Well, I know things haven't been great, but... 200 00:09:46,127 --> 00:09:47,921 How long have you been thinking about this? 201 00:09:48,296 --> 00:09:49,631 Right up here is fine. 202 00:09:49,714 --> 00:09:51,633 The third brownstone on the right. 203 00:09:59,099 --> 00:10:01,726 No, actually wait. There's gonna be two stops. 204 00:10:02,227 --> 00:10:04,896 Wait, you want to take the break starting now? 205 00:10:05,230 --> 00:10:06,606 I thought you would at least come up. 206 00:10:06,689 --> 00:10:10,151 -We need to talk. -No. I don't need to talk. 207 00:10:10,401 --> 00:10:12,445 Okay, I need some time to think. 208 00:10:13,071 --> 00:10:14,489 Well, how much time? 209 00:10:15,448 --> 00:10:16,616 About a week. 210 00:10:17,117 --> 00:10:18,785 I'm gonna go out to my Hamptons' house, 211 00:10:18,868 --> 00:10:20,495 I just need some distance. 212 00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:22,872 Sort through stuff. 213 00:10:22,956 --> 00:10:24,249 Is that okay? 214 00:10:24,332 --> 00:10:25,166 What? 215 00:10:25,250 --> 00:10:29,337 I'm supposed to decide what I feel about this with the meter running? 216 00:10:32,090 --> 00:10:33,716 Yeah, okay, go. 217 00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:36,177 I'll call you when I get back. 218 00:10:41,391 --> 00:10:43,351 Well, thanks for dinner! 219 00:10:53,027 --> 00:10:55,697 I knew we were having problems, but a break? 220 00:10:55,780 --> 00:10:58,867 What am I, some horrible job he needs to get away from? 221 00:10:58,950 --> 00:11:00,618 A break isn't always a bad thing. 222 00:11:00,702 --> 00:11:03,329 Oh, come on! It's a hop, skip, and a week from a break up. 223 00:11:03,413 --> 00:11:04,914 Or it's the thing that saves you 224 00:11:04,998 --> 00:11:07,250 from saying the things that you wish you could take back, 225 00:11:07,333 --> 00:11:08,293 but you can't. 226 00:11:08,459 --> 00:11:10,128 If Harry and I had taken a break, 227 00:11:10,211 --> 00:11:12,338 then maybe I wouldn't be out on blind dates again. 228 00:11:12,422 --> 00:11:14,340 Hey, remember when a break was a good thing? 229 00:11:14,424 --> 00:11:16,593 Spring break, coffee break. 230 00:11:16,676 --> 00:11:19,846 Now it's break up, break down. 231 00:11:19,929 --> 00:11:22,348 They keep getting worse. What's next? 232 00:11:22,432 --> 00:11:24,267 -Hip break. - You know what I think? 233 00:11:24,350 --> 00:11:26,978 I think, don't do that. 234 00:11:28,188 --> 00:11:29,189 Do what? 235 00:11:30,607 --> 00:11:32,942 Well, I'm sorry, I'm upset. 236 00:11:33,026 --> 00:11:34,152 Well, don't be. 237 00:11:34,235 --> 00:11:36,529 You'll be even more upset when your face is all lined. 238 00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:41,201 As far as I'm concerned, the test of a good relationship is: 239 00:11:41,284 --> 00:11:42,744 Are you like this? 240 00:11:43,578 --> 00:11:45,121 Or like this? 241 00:11:46,289 --> 00:11:48,458 That is the test of a good relationship? 242 00:11:48,541 --> 00:11:50,668 -Mmm-hmm. -Or a good dermatologist. 243 00:11:50,752 --> 00:11:51,628 Make fun. 244 00:11:51,711 --> 00:11:53,379 But a bump in the road is never good. 245 00:11:53,463 --> 00:11:56,507 And you shouldn't bother staying around to find out how not good. 246 00:11:56,591 --> 00:11:58,051 Well, it's not all frowns. 247 00:11:58,134 --> 00:11:59,886 Berger and I have a lot of good stuff too. 248 00:11:59,969 --> 00:12:01,262 It's complicated. 249 00:12:01,346 --> 00:12:03,765 Complicated by the fact that the man had to go all the way 250 00:12:03,848 --> 00:12:05,600 to Long Island to think this through. 251 00:12:05,683 --> 00:12:07,894 Maybe you can send him a postcard. 252 00:12:09,479 --> 00:12:13,441 That is the most blatant agenda-pushing I have ever seen. 253 00:12:13,524 --> 00:12:15,526 -And the most effective. -Wow! 254 00:12:15,610 --> 00:12:17,946 I just wish I knew what he was thinking. 255 00:12:18,029 --> 00:12:21,032 Oh, who cares? Look at his pecs. 256 00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:22,825 I meant Berger. 257 00:12:23,409 --> 00:12:25,370 It's so frustrating. What am I supposed to do? 258 00:12:25,453 --> 00:12:28,081 Just sit around waiting to find out whether he chooses me? 259 00:12:28,164 --> 00:12:31,376 I'm doing that all day at jury duty and it sucks. 260 00:12:31,459 --> 00:12:32,710 Here's an idea! 261 00:12:32,794 --> 00:12:35,421 Why don't you use this time to think about what you want? 262 00:12:35,505 --> 00:12:36,839 Remember you? 263 00:12:36,923 --> 00:12:38,299 What do you want? 264 00:12:38,383 --> 00:12:39,801 Ah! 265 00:12:44,264 --> 00:12:48,643 The next day, I got to thinking about trials and trial separations. 266 00:12:48,726 --> 00:12:51,854 In a courtroom, a jury decides the outcome. 267 00:12:51,938 --> 00:12:55,858 In a relationship, the victims have to decide their own fate. 268 00:12:55,942 --> 00:13:00,697 How can two people mired in the mess ever figure it out? 269 00:13:01,155 --> 00:13:03,825 Do we need distance to get close? 270 00:13:05,493 --> 00:13:06,911 Uh, sorry. 271 00:13:06,995 --> 00:13:08,746 Cab gridlock situation. 272 00:13:08,830 --> 00:13:11,541 They should rename the West Side Highway the "No-Way" Highway. 273 00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:14,919 Ah, let me just pull out my files on the Mackenzie case-- 274 00:13:15,003 --> 00:13:17,088 We're not here to discuss the Mackenzie case. 275 00:13:17,171 --> 00:13:20,425 Oh! I'm sorry then, what is this meeting about? 276 00:13:20,508 --> 00:13:21,968 You. 277 00:13:22,051 --> 00:13:24,304 We're concerned. 278 00:13:24,387 --> 00:13:27,849 It's been noted recently that you've been late to important meetings 279 00:13:27,932 --> 00:13:30,310 and are struggling to handle your case load. 280 00:13:30,977 --> 00:13:33,521 I'm sorry, Maurice. I don't know what you mean. 281 00:13:33,604 --> 00:13:34,814 I was late today, but-- 282 00:13:34,897 --> 00:13:37,317 Actually, you've been late rather frequently. 283 00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:42,238 There was the deposition last Tuesday, and the motion hearing last Friday, 284 00:13:42,322 --> 00:13:43,865 and you left early on Monday. 285 00:13:43,948 --> 00:13:45,867 Way to watch my back, Fern. 286 00:13:45,950 --> 00:13:47,410 I understand it's been difficult. 287 00:13:47,493 --> 00:13:48,828 With the new baby and all. 288 00:13:48,911 --> 00:13:50,038 Got it. 289 00:13:50,955 --> 00:13:52,957 No problem, won't happen again. 290 00:13:53,708 --> 00:13:56,252 But let me say, as far as the Mackenzie brief, 291 00:13:56,336 --> 00:13:58,379 Miranda Hobbes is kicking ass. 292 00:13:58,463 --> 00:14:00,506 Where I am doing a bad job is at home. 293 00:14:00,798 --> 00:14:04,177 So, if you'll excuse me, I have work to do. 294 00:14:08,181 --> 00:14:10,391 And may I remind you that when my mother died, 295 00:14:10,475 --> 00:14:13,019 I was back in the office on Monday. 296 00:14:23,029 --> 00:14:24,614 Oh. 297 00:14:24,697 --> 00:14:26,074 Guess what I'm drinking? 298 00:14:26,157 --> 00:14:29,327 An Absolut Hunk, you're a drink! 299 00:14:29,410 --> 00:14:32,497 Mmm, and you're delish. 300 00:14:32,580 --> 00:14:36,084 Take off that ski cap. Let people see you. 301 00:14:36,167 --> 00:14:38,086 I don't want people to see me. 302 00:14:38,169 --> 00:14:39,962 Everybody's giving me shit about the poster. 303 00:14:40,046 --> 00:14:42,340 Oh, you're insane. People love it! 304 00:14:42,423 --> 00:14:43,674 Not my people. 305 00:14:43,758 --> 00:14:46,594 My sober buddies are pissed that I'm shelling for a liquor company, 306 00:14:46,677 --> 00:14:47,970 my acting class thinks I'm a sell-out, 307 00:14:48,054 --> 00:14:51,099 my ma's running around every grocery store in Seattle hiding magazines, 308 00:14:51,182 --> 00:14:53,643 so my 96-year-old grandmother doesn't see my dick. 309 00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:56,479 Drunks, nobodies, prudes. 310 00:14:57,313 --> 00:14:59,065 But, I just don't see where this is going. 311 00:14:59,148 --> 00:15:02,026 It would be one thing if I was getting auditions, 312 00:15:02,110 --> 00:15:03,236 but nothing's happening. 313 00:15:03,319 --> 00:15:06,364 I'm sorry to bother you, but are you the Absolut Hunk? 314 00:15:06,447 --> 00:15:07,407 Yes! 315 00:15:07,490 --> 00:15:09,158 -He is. 316 00:15:09,242 --> 00:15:13,162 Well, I just wanted to say that my friends and I are huge, huge fans. 317 00:15:13,246 --> 00:15:14,539 Oh, my God. 318 00:15:14,622 --> 00:15:16,541 Hi. 319 00:15:17,750 --> 00:15:20,378 It's working! What did I tell you? 320 00:15:20,461 --> 00:15:23,589 How does those guys toasting me mean my acting career is happening? 321 00:15:23,673 --> 00:15:25,883 First come the gays, then the girls, 322 00:15:25,967 --> 00:15:28,261 then... the industry. 323 00:15:29,345 --> 00:15:32,890 - Cheers! -Cheers. 324 00:15:32,974 --> 00:15:34,851 And speaking of Absolute Gay, 325 00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:37,270 Charlotte was on a lunch date with Yenta number two's son. 326 00:15:37,353 --> 00:15:41,357 So, I mean, I guess I just knew it wasn't gonna work out. 327 00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:43,276 I mean, I like practicing Pilates, 328 00:15:43,359 --> 00:15:44,861 but I don't want to talk about it all day 329 00:15:44,944 --> 00:15:46,612 with my significant other. 330 00:15:46,696 --> 00:15:50,366 And what are you looking for exactly in a... 331 00:15:50,450 --> 00:15:52,243 "significant other"? 332 00:15:52,326 --> 00:15:54,787 Look... We don't need to do this. 333 00:15:54,871 --> 00:15:57,457 You know I'm gay. I know I'm gay. 334 00:15:57,540 --> 00:15:59,792 The only person who doesn't know I'm gay is my mother. 335 00:15:59,876 --> 00:16:00,960 -Oh. 336 00:16:01,043 --> 00:16:04,213 So if you really want to know what my type is... 337 00:16:04,297 --> 00:16:05,506 That's it. 338 00:16:06,174 --> 00:16:07,467 I know him. 339 00:16:08,050 --> 00:16:09,886 Get out! Get out! 340 00:16:09,969 --> 00:16:11,429 Could you introduce me? 341 00:16:12,138 --> 00:16:13,723 Actually, he's straight. 342 00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:15,308 Oh! 343 00:16:15,391 --> 00:16:17,059 My brother will be so disappointed. 344 00:16:17,143 --> 00:16:18,769 We're obsessed with him. 345 00:16:22,732 --> 00:16:24,233 Charlotte, honey. 346 00:16:24,317 --> 00:16:25,193 Hi, Elaine. 347 00:16:25,276 --> 00:16:26,903 You went out with a fagelah and a mieskeit 348 00:16:26,986 --> 00:16:28,571 and you can't go out with my David? 349 00:16:28,654 --> 00:16:30,490 It's just those blind dates are so... 350 00:16:30,573 --> 00:16:32,241 Wait, not so blind. 351 00:16:32,325 --> 00:16:34,494 I showed David your picture from the last newsletter 352 00:16:34,577 --> 00:16:36,621 and he thought you were a knockout. 353 00:16:36,704 --> 00:16:38,122 Well, that's nice. 354 00:16:38,206 --> 00:16:41,083 I told him you'd be at the next single and mingle night at the temple, 355 00:16:41,167 --> 00:16:42,293 you could meet there. 356 00:16:42,376 --> 00:16:44,504 He's a looker, my David. 357 00:16:44,587 --> 00:16:48,341 Now, I know most people say that about their children, but he is. 358 00:16:49,133 --> 00:16:50,176 Oh. 359 00:16:50,259 --> 00:16:52,470 And he's even better looking in person. 360 00:16:52,553 --> 00:16:55,181 -So you'll meet him? -Mmm. 361 00:16:55,264 --> 00:16:57,934 Never had braces, can you imagine? 362 00:16:58,017 --> 00:17:00,478 Some people are bullied into blind dating. 363 00:17:00,561 --> 00:17:02,563 Charlotte was bubbied. 364 00:17:03,648 --> 00:17:06,567 I'm here, I'm here. 365 00:17:06,651 --> 00:17:07,944 Is he still awake? 366 00:17:08,027 --> 00:17:09,362 Oh. No, no. 367 00:17:09,445 --> 00:17:11,822 Boy go to sleep an hour ago. 368 00:17:13,449 --> 00:17:14,367 Great! 369 00:17:15,201 --> 00:17:16,118 It's great. 370 00:17:20,081 --> 00:17:23,417 Well, I just guess I can just get back to my work then. 371 00:17:29,632 --> 00:17:32,552 That night, the only thing Miranda put to bed 372 00:17:32,635 --> 00:17:34,220 was the Mackenzie brief. 373 00:17:36,556 --> 00:17:38,933 The next day, the verdict was in. 374 00:17:39,016 --> 00:17:43,938 Century 21, the downtown discount store, was the best part of jury duty. 375 00:17:44,397 --> 00:17:47,149 -Hello. 376 00:17:47,233 --> 00:17:50,945 I'm with two men in plaid pants and I'm carrying a nine iron. 377 00:17:51,028 --> 00:17:52,989 Greetings from California. 378 00:17:53,072 --> 00:17:55,241 Oh, you think that's bad? I'm discount shopping. 379 00:17:55,324 --> 00:17:57,118 What are you doing golfing? 380 00:17:57,493 --> 00:17:59,954 I'm just in it for the scotch afterwards. 381 00:18:00,037 --> 00:18:01,372 How are things? 382 00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:02,623 Uh, pretty good. 383 00:18:02,707 --> 00:18:05,543 So far I've found the most unbelievable Anna Molinari dress 384 00:18:05,626 --> 00:18:07,211 and a Dolce kimono. 385 00:18:07,461 --> 00:18:09,338 I meant in your life. 386 00:18:10,172 --> 00:18:11,215 How's tricks? 387 00:18:11,299 --> 00:18:12,717 Tricks are for kids. 388 00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:14,385 Okay, kid. 389 00:18:14,468 --> 00:18:16,762 So, how's it going with that guy, hot dog? 390 00:18:16,929 --> 00:18:19,307 Berger. Why do you ask? 391 00:18:19,390 --> 00:18:21,684 Because we're friends and friends ask other friends 392 00:18:21,767 --> 00:18:23,894 how things are in their lives. 393 00:18:23,978 --> 00:18:26,188 Besides, I don't tee off for another ten minutes. 394 00:18:26,272 --> 00:18:28,858 Uh, we're great, great. 395 00:18:28,941 --> 00:18:30,443 Moved in together yet? 396 00:18:30,526 --> 00:18:31,360 Um... 397 00:18:31,444 --> 00:18:33,279 Actually, we're taking it slow. 398 00:18:34,405 --> 00:18:35,281 What's that mean? 399 00:18:35,406 --> 00:18:37,283 Well, we're kinda taking a break. 400 00:18:37,575 --> 00:18:38,743 You're taking a break? 401 00:18:38,826 --> 00:18:39,827 A little break. 402 00:18:39,910 --> 00:18:41,162 I don't know why I told him. 403 00:18:41,245 --> 00:18:42,788 I think I crumbled under questioning. 404 00:18:42,872 --> 00:18:44,123 You haven't been together that long. 405 00:18:44,206 --> 00:18:45,249 What are you taking a break from? 406 00:18:45,333 --> 00:18:47,668 Well, sometimes a person needs a little space. 407 00:18:47,752 --> 00:18:48,919 From you? 408 00:18:49,003 --> 00:18:50,296 This guy must be crazy. 409 00:18:50,379 --> 00:18:53,424 Spoken by the man who moved 3,000 miles away. 410 00:18:55,051 --> 00:18:56,969 You know, a break can be a very good thing. 411 00:18:57,094 --> 00:18:58,929 As long as you're alright with it. 412 00:18:59,013 --> 00:19:00,973 I am very okay with it, in fact-- 413 00:19:01,057 --> 00:19:01,932 Carrie, you're breaking up. 414 00:19:02,016 --> 00:19:03,559 No, we're not, Berger and I will fig-- 415 00:19:03,643 --> 00:19:05,269 No, your cell phone is breaking up. 416 00:19:05,353 --> 00:19:07,146 I can hardly hear you. Hello? 417 00:19:07,229 --> 00:19:09,065 - Hello? -He... 418 00:19:09,148 --> 00:19:11,400 With an armful of discount clothing, 419 00:19:11,484 --> 00:19:14,320 I realized I could no longer discount my feelings. 420 00:19:14,987 --> 00:19:16,572 I decided to rent a car 421 00:19:16,656 --> 00:19:19,825 and drive the distance to get closer to Berger. 422 00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:30,586 I paid $187 to drive 40-feet. 423 00:19:30,670 --> 00:19:32,129 What did I think I was gonna do? 424 00:19:32,213 --> 00:19:34,215 Badger my boyfriend into being with me? 425 00:19:34,757 --> 00:19:36,008 Well, that's one option. 426 00:19:36,092 --> 00:19:40,054 I just keep thinking, you know, if I stick with it... 427 00:19:40,137 --> 00:19:42,264 just tried a little harder-- 428 00:19:42,348 --> 00:19:43,349 Carrie... 429 00:19:43,432 --> 00:19:46,519 You know how much I like Berger, but come on. 430 00:19:46,602 --> 00:19:48,813 No one can accuse you of not having tried. 431 00:19:48,896 --> 00:19:52,108 -You did good. -I mean, Berger can be... 432 00:19:52,191 --> 00:19:55,444 threatened and insecure, 433 00:19:55,528 --> 00:19:58,030 and sometimes he shuts down. But... 434 00:19:58,114 --> 00:19:59,949 But he's also smart and funny... 435 00:20:00,032 --> 00:20:04,370 Like, he made up this thing... this "Hollywood kiss" thing. 436 00:20:04,453 --> 00:20:06,747 Whenever we're being pissy with each other, 437 00:20:06,831 --> 00:20:09,208 we do this fake Hollywood kiss bit... 438 00:20:09,917 --> 00:20:11,502 and it makes us laugh. 439 00:20:11,585 --> 00:20:13,421 You guys need a "bit"? 440 00:20:13,504 --> 00:20:15,339 I know, it isn't working. 441 00:20:15,423 --> 00:20:17,717 Why is it so hard to admit that? 442 00:20:19,093 --> 00:20:21,262 God, I gotta break up with him. 443 00:20:22,513 --> 00:20:23,556 If he ever comes back. 444 00:20:23,639 --> 00:20:25,224 -Mmm. - All clean! 445 00:20:25,307 --> 00:20:27,143 - Oh... -Oh, lookie, here's mommy. 446 00:20:27,226 --> 00:20:28,811 - Hey, guy. 447 00:20:28,894 --> 00:20:30,646 -Here we go. Yes. -How was your bath? 448 00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:33,107 Magda, I'll see you at 8:00 tomorrow. 449 00:20:33,190 --> 00:20:35,401 Thank you for everything. It's okay. 450 00:20:35,484 --> 00:20:37,111 Don't cry, Magda be back tomorrow. 451 00:20:37,194 --> 00:20:41,073 Hey, I missed you today, how are you? 452 00:20:41,157 --> 00:20:43,033 Bye-bye, Brady. No more crying. 453 00:20:43,159 --> 00:20:46,245 -Oh, you, darling. Bye-bye. 454 00:20:47,246 --> 00:20:49,999 Oh... What's wrong with him? 455 00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:52,001 Oh, he'll be fine. 456 00:20:52,084 --> 00:20:54,336 He just misses his mommy... 457 00:20:54,420 --> 00:20:55,671 Magda. 458 00:20:55,755 --> 00:20:57,298 It's okay. 459 00:20:57,381 --> 00:21:01,594 The next day, Miranda decided to do something about that. 460 00:21:01,677 --> 00:21:03,596 We both know that this isn't working. 461 00:21:03,679 --> 00:21:07,808 And as much as I would like it to, it's not just gonna magically change. 462 00:21:07,892 --> 00:21:08,809 What are you saying? 463 00:21:08,893 --> 00:21:10,352 I can't keep working like this. 464 00:21:10,436 --> 00:21:12,897 I'm going to have to cut way back... 465 00:21:14,064 --> 00:21:15,608 to 50 hours a week. 466 00:21:19,820 --> 00:21:21,447 55 tops. 467 00:21:27,453 --> 00:21:30,206 Yeah, okay. 468 00:21:31,499 --> 00:21:34,794 -Yeah... 469 00:21:34,877 --> 00:21:38,088 That night, Miranda was there to put Brady to bed, 470 00:21:38,172 --> 00:21:41,550 but there would still be times when she wouldn't be around, 471 00:21:41,634 --> 00:21:45,304 so Miranda found a way to be around. 472 00:21:45,387 --> 00:21:46,722 - Yeah. 473 00:21:47,389 --> 00:21:50,267 And at bus stops all around town... 474 00:21:50,351 --> 00:21:52,144 Fuckin' A. 475 00:21:52,228 --> 00:21:54,730 Everybody in New York thinks I'm an asshole. 476 00:21:54,814 --> 00:21:57,066 Listen blondie, if you're gonna be in this business, 477 00:21:57,149 --> 00:22:00,027 you're gonna have to be a lot more thick-skinned than this. 478 00:22:00,653 --> 00:22:02,738 What business? The naked hustler business? 479 00:22:02,822 --> 00:22:04,073 Look, I understand you're upset, 480 00:22:04,156 --> 00:22:05,741 but you're gonna have to take a step backwards 481 00:22:05,825 --> 00:22:07,368 and see the big picture. 482 00:22:07,785 --> 00:22:08,994 I need some time to think. 483 00:22:09,078 --> 00:22:11,163 -I'll see you later. -Stop right there. 484 00:22:12,790 --> 00:22:14,375 So there's a bump in the road. 485 00:22:15,292 --> 00:22:17,419 You can't bail the minute things get rough. 486 00:22:18,045 --> 00:22:20,798 Now, trust me, this will all work out. 487 00:22:22,174 --> 00:22:23,676 What if you're wrong? 488 00:22:24,218 --> 00:22:26,095 There it was, a frown. 489 00:22:26,178 --> 00:22:28,681 Or as close to a frown as Samantha and her dermatologist, 490 00:22:28,764 --> 00:22:30,474 Dr. Peterson, would allow. 491 00:22:30,558 --> 00:22:31,559 Oh, my God, look! 492 00:22:31,642 --> 00:22:33,894 There he is, the Absolut Hunk! 493 00:22:36,313 --> 00:22:37,398 What did I tell you? 494 00:22:37,481 --> 00:22:39,942 First the gays, now the girls... 495 00:22:43,737 --> 00:22:47,366 A hop, skip, and a week later, the industry followed. 496 00:22:47,449 --> 00:22:51,996 Gus Van Sant offered Smith the part of a model/hustler/junkie 497 00:22:52,079 --> 00:22:55,541 in his latest movie, which he happily accepted. 498 00:22:56,834 --> 00:22:59,128 Uh, you grew up in Connecticut? I went to school there. 499 00:22:59,211 --> 00:23:00,296 Really, where'd you go? 500 00:23:00,379 --> 00:23:01,297 Yale. 501 00:23:01,380 --> 00:23:02,548 Oh. 502 00:23:03,465 --> 00:23:05,301 Something wrong with Yale? 503 00:23:05,384 --> 00:23:07,177 No, no, it's just... 504 00:23:08,304 --> 00:23:09,346 Yale. 505 00:23:09,430 --> 00:23:11,849 Charlotte knew how silly she sounded. 506 00:23:11,932 --> 00:23:13,976 The problem wasn't that David went to Yale. 507 00:23:14,059 --> 00:23:16,729 The problem was, he wasn't Harry. 508 00:23:17,938 --> 00:23:20,024 David, you're really nice. 509 00:23:20,107 --> 00:23:22,484 In fact, you're perfect. 510 00:23:22,568 --> 00:23:24,820 But, for where I am right now, 511 00:23:24,904 --> 00:23:27,698 you might as well be a gay man with carnations. 512 00:23:28,324 --> 00:23:29,325 I'm sorry? 513 00:23:29,992 --> 00:23:32,036 I'm just not ready to date. 514 00:23:32,578 --> 00:23:33,913 Okay. 515 00:23:34,663 --> 00:23:36,957 Do you wanna go back to my apartment and have sex? 516 00:23:37,249 --> 00:23:38,792 No. 517 00:23:39,835 --> 00:23:41,253 Figured it was worth asking. 518 00:23:41,337 --> 00:23:44,006 - Okay. 519 00:23:44,924 --> 00:23:47,134 I think I'm gonna head out, bye. 520 00:23:55,184 --> 00:23:56,352 This blows. 521 00:23:56,435 --> 00:23:58,604 The only cute guy just left. 522 00:23:58,687 --> 00:24:01,148 All that's left is the fatties and the baldies. 523 00:24:01,231 --> 00:24:04,109 Charlotte could only hope that one of the baldies 524 00:24:04,193 --> 00:24:05,402 was her baldie. 525 00:24:26,340 --> 00:24:28,634 Out of all the synagogues in all the cities 526 00:24:28,717 --> 00:24:30,678 you had to walk into mine. 527 00:24:31,595 --> 00:24:32,846 Harry. 528 00:24:34,348 --> 00:24:35,474 How ya been? 529 00:24:37,101 --> 00:24:38,978 Not good. 530 00:24:40,354 --> 00:24:41,897 I miss you. 531 00:24:41,981 --> 00:24:46,402 And being away from you just only made it all the more clear 532 00:24:46,485 --> 00:24:48,278 how much I love you. 533 00:24:48,362 --> 00:24:49,947 -Charlotte... -Wait. Just... 534 00:24:50,030 --> 00:24:51,824 Let me finish. 535 00:24:52,658 --> 00:24:54,785 I don't care if you ever marry me. 536 00:24:55,744 --> 00:24:57,454 I just want to be with you. 537 00:24:58,706 --> 00:25:01,834 I would be lucky to have you. 538 00:25:02,209 --> 00:25:04,962 So, if you can find some way to forgive me, 539 00:25:05,045 --> 00:25:06,714 if you could just call me, 540 00:25:06,797 --> 00:25:10,551 or just ask me out again. 541 00:25:12,052 --> 00:25:14,346 Well, that's not good enough. 542 00:25:22,980 --> 00:25:25,357 Charlotte York... 543 00:25:27,151 --> 00:25:28,861 will you marry me? 544 00:25:32,114 --> 00:25:35,576 Yes. Yes, I'll marry you. 545 00:25:35,659 --> 00:25:37,369 Oh! 546 00:25:40,581 --> 00:25:43,125 I am so coming back next week. 547 00:25:43,208 --> 00:25:44,585 Uh-huh. 548 00:25:52,092 --> 00:25:55,220 It wasn't a pineapple, but it was just as weird, 549 00:25:55,304 --> 00:25:58,807 and there was only one other person who would really appreciate it. 550 00:25:58,891 --> 00:26:02,144 At that moment I knew I wasn't ready to let Berger go. 551 00:26:02,227 --> 00:26:04,605 Okay, people, you're released. 552 00:26:10,903 --> 00:26:12,112 Who is it? 553 00:26:12,196 --> 00:26:14,406 It's me. I'm back. 554 00:26:15,365 --> 00:26:17,659 Oh. Well, come on up. 555 00:26:17,743 --> 00:26:20,704 When it comes to a trial, you have to listen to the evidence. 556 00:26:20,788 --> 00:26:23,207 But when it comes to the trials of love, 557 00:26:23,290 --> 00:26:25,084 you have to listen to your heart. 558 00:26:25,167 --> 00:26:27,586 I didn't know what Berger's verdict would be, 559 00:26:27,669 --> 00:26:28,837 but I knew mine. 560 00:26:36,678 --> 00:26:38,806 I hear they're making a comeback. 561 00:26:45,979 --> 00:26:48,690 Hey, Berger, I know things have been bad, but I really think-- 562 00:26:48,774 --> 00:26:49,650 I know. 563 00:26:50,943 --> 00:26:52,402 I love you, Carrie. 564 00:26:52,861 --> 00:26:54,488 I want to try to make this work. 565 00:26:59,118 --> 00:27:01,411 Hey, you're never gonna believe it. 566 00:27:01,495 --> 00:27:02,913 You know the mango guy? 567 00:27:03,163 --> 00:27:04,248 He pulled out... 568 00:27:04,331 --> 00:27:06,291 -A pineapple? -A coconut. 569 00:27:06,375 --> 00:27:08,961 Oh, so close. 570 00:27:09,044 --> 00:27:10,087 I know.