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♪ They say it's spring ♪
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♪ This feeling
Light as a feather ♪
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♪ They say this thing ♪
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♪ This magic we share together ♪
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♪ Came with the weather too ♪
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[Carrie] Here are some things
I love about New York.
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That week in spring
when it's warm, but not hot,
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and the trees
are just beginning to bloom.
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Men in suits.
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Three papers
and 12 gossip columns.
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It's easy for me to say,
"I love you, New York."
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It's not so easy to say,
"I love you, Mr. Big."
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The first time I realized
I actually loved Big
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was over toast
and coffee one morning.
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What?
16
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You got...
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Huh? Oh.
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Thanks, honey.
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[laughs]
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What?
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Nothing.
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The first time I actually
felt like saying it
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was the night he took me
to the ballet.
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And he hates the ballet.
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I don't want to disappoint you,
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but I think a couple
of those dancers had on wires.
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-They were not on wires.
-Oh, yeah.
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On a couple of those big
leaps I saw the wires.
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You know what?
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What?
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I love your hair like that.
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Cut it out.
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[Carrie laughs]
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[Carrie] And then there was the
time I never expected to say it.
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Last Friday night
at approximately 7:20 p.m...
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Yuck.
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...Big was picking me up
to take me out to dinner.
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Hey. Hi, I just have to
change my shoes.
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Well, hurry up,
we don't want to be late.
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If we grab a cab on Madison,
we can be there in five minutes.
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Okay. Okay.
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Here.
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Well, what's this for?
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Oh, I just saw it
and thought of you.
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[Carrie] It was just... wrong.
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It was wrong.
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I didn't know what
to say except...
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I love you.
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[Samantha] You told Big,
"I love you,"
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because he gave you that?
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What did you think it was,
a large diamond duck ring?
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I think my mother
has one of these
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in the shape of a squirrel.
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Note, I did not say
I love the purse.
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And then what did he say?
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Well, he just sort of
reacted stunned for a moment
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and then he said...
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Well...
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you're welcome.
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I'll just wait for you outside.
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[Charlotte] Well, maybe he
thought you said, "I love it."
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No, it was a very deliberate
and distinct "you."
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So he just sort of pretended
like you didn't say it?
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Yeah, sort of.
But we both know I did.
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So, now I've
laid down the gauntlet.
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He either has to say
"I love you" back,
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or I guess I'm gonna have
to break up with him.
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Well, how long are you
gonna give him?
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Well, I didn't put an expiration
date on the sentiment.
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But I figure it's got the shelf
life of a dairy product.
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It's gonna start
to curdle in about a week.
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You know, it's so interesting.
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You can tell a man,
"I hate you,"
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you have the best
sex of your life.
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But tell him, "I love you,"
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you'll probably never
see him again.
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Well, that's just
very comforting right now.
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Wait a minute. Time out.
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Did you ever think
that at this very moment
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the man might be trying to find
his own way to tell Carrie
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that he loves her?
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[Carrie] Listening to Miranda
wax optimistic about love
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was more disorienting
than a heat wave in February.
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-No.
-[Samantha] No.
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No.
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[Carrie] But it seemed
that Miranda,
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formerly love's
greatest skeptic,
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had recently experienced
a romantic epiphany.
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Go grab us a seat outside
and I'll meet you out there.
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Will you let me pay this time?
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No, no, no,
your money's no good here.
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Go grab... grab us a bench.
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All right.
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How much?
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-[cashier] $5.90.
-Ow!
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[Carrie] She was dating
a bartender who worshiped her.
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And Miranda was so crazy
about him in return
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that she let him
take her out to dinner.
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But only to places she
knew he could afford.
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Mmm!
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Best slices in the city,
don't you think?
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Mmm.
103
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So...
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Saturday my firm is having
its annual dinner thing.
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And I was wondering
if you think that maybe the bar
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could spare you for a night,
you could be my date.
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I warn you,
it's going to be totally boring.
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It's not gonna be boring
if I'm there with you.
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You probably should wear a suit.
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Oh!
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So it's gonna be
a big fancy affair.
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You do have a suit, right?
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Sure I do.
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It's really nice.
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It's gold.
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It's gold?
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Yeah, you know, um...
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corduroy.
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What's wrong with corduroy?
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I don't have enough time to tell
you what's wrong with corduroy.
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[laughs]
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[Carrie] For the first time,
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Steve took Miranda back
to his place.
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So...
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this is your apartment.
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Yeah.
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You like?
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It's sweet.
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I modeled it after De Niro's
place in Taxi Driver .
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I'm kidding! [laughs]
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Yeah, I...
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It's cheap.
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And it's near the bar.
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And you never have
to come here again.
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[Carrie] That evening,
Miranda experienced
her first pangs of yuppie guilt.
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A lot of wonderful artists
worked as bartenders for years.
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That doesn't mean he won't
be making money someday.
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He's not an artist
slash bartender.
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He's just happy being
a bartender, period.
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No aspirations beyond
shaking the cocktails
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and refilling the peanut bowls.
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How's he in bed?
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There are no words.
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Sounds like a dream
relationship to me.
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Yeah, he can make you cum
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and then he can make
you a Cosmopolitan.
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[everyone laughs]
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Honestly, I don't know how you
can get serious with a guy
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whose entire future
is based on tips.
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Wait a minute.
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Rich men date not so
rich women all the time.
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I mean, come on,
look at me and Big.
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It's not about money,
it's about compatibility.
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Yeah, but it's normal
for the guy to have more money.
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-[Samantha] Oh, c'mon.
-God.
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I know lots of women who make
more money than their husbands.
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You're all missing my point.
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None of this matters to me.
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I just don't want it
to matter to him.
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It's like when single men
have a lot of money
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it works to their advantage.
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But when a single woman
has money
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it's a problem
you have to deal with.
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It's ridiculous.
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I want to enjoy my success,
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not apologize for it.
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Bravo, honey. Bravo.
168
00:08:01,011 --> 00:08:04,021
But you're talking about more
than a difference in income.
169
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You're talking about
a difference in background
and education.
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This guy is working class.
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Working class?
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-[Charlotte] Yeah.
-It's the millennium, sweetie.
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We don't say things like
"working class" anymore.
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But you're trying to
pretend that we live in
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a classless society,
and we don't.
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Okay, Marie Antoinette,
we get the picture.
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Thank you.
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You know, she's right.
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I'm dating a guy right now,
and he's got an actual servant.
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What?
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-Really?
-Yeah.
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[Carrie] It seems that Samantha
183
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was dating Harvey Terkell,
184
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a real estate investor
185
00:08:41,015 --> 00:08:43,005
who had just made
a killing in the market
186
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turning Chelsea sweatshops
into luxury co-ops
187
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for the upwardly trendy.
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Sum is a fantastic cook.
189
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You won't eat better
Thai food in Bangkok.
190
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More cellophane noodles,
Mr. Harvey?
191
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Yes, please.
192
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You like spicy like
Mr. Harvey, miss?
193
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I love spicy.
194
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Enjoy.
195
00:09:05,005 --> 00:09:06,015
Isn't she the best?
196
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I tell you,
I could not live without her.
197
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[Carrie]
I wondered, was New York really
any different from New Delhi?
198
00:09:14,020 --> 00:09:18,000
Had our class system been
replaced by a caste system?
199
00:09:18,004 --> 00:09:22,024
And if so, can we date
outside our caste?
200
00:09:22,017 --> 00:09:25,997
That night, Big took me out
for a romantic dinner.
201
00:09:26,003 --> 00:09:27,013
I could smell it coming,
202
00:09:27,009 --> 00:09:28,019
the way you can smell
a thunderstorm
203
00:09:28,023 --> 00:09:30,013
right before it hits.
204
00:09:30,011 --> 00:09:33,011
A mere two days after I had
said, "I love you,"
205
00:09:33,008 --> 00:09:37,008
Big had found his own way
to say I love you to me.
206
00:09:37,007 --> 00:09:38,007
[Big] You're gonna love this.
207
00:09:38,018 --> 00:09:41,018
It's from a small winery
in the heart of Tuscany.
208
00:09:43,013 --> 00:09:44,023
Mmm.
209
00:09:44,018 --> 00:09:46,008
Delicioso.
210
00:09:48,020 --> 00:09:51,010
I rented a villa there
one summer with the ex.
211
00:09:52,004 --> 00:09:53,014
It was incredible.
212
00:09:56,003 --> 00:09:59,013
I've always wanted to go back
with someone I actually liked.
213
00:10:03,002 --> 00:10:05,022
Listen... there's something
I've been meaning to tell you
214
00:10:05,021 --> 00:10:08,011
ever since the night
I gave you the purse.
215
00:10:10,015 --> 00:10:11,015
Yeah?
216
00:10:14,003 --> 00:10:16,023
You can take it back
if you don't like it.
217
00:10:16,017 --> 00:10:19,007
[Carrie] That became the first
night I wanted to tell Big,
218
00:10:20,003 --> 00:10:21,013
"I hate you."
219
00:10:26,001 --> 00:10:28,011
The next afternoon,
Charlotte made the acquaintance
220
00:10:28,007 --> 00:10:30,017
of a member
of the very highest caste.
221
00:10:30,019 --> 00:10:33,019
A caste that,
from coast to coast,
rich and poor,
222
00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:37,000
everyone deferred to
and honored without question...
223
00:10:37,018 --> 00:10:39,008
the movie star.
224
00:10:42,004 --> 00:10:44,014
Hi. I'm Charlotte York,
225
00:10:44,009 --> 00:10:45,019
I'm the director of the gallery.
226
00:10:46,001 --> 00:10:48,001
Hi. Wylie Ford.
227
00:10:48,002 --> 00:10:49,022
Yeah. I know.
228
00:10:51,006 --> 00:10:52,996
How much for this piece?
229
00:10:54,002 --> 00:10:56,012
The fire extinguisher?
230
00:10:58,002 --> 00:10:59,012
Oh, no, no, no.
231
00:10:59,014 --> 00:11:01,024
That's a real fire extinguisher.
232
00:11:01,018 --> 00:11:03,998
You know, like for the gallery
233
00:11:04,002 --> 00:11:06,012
in case there's a fire.
234
00:11:06,019 --> 00:11:08,009
[laughs]
235
00:11:08,012 --> 00:11:09,022
I guess I'm a total idiot.
236
00:11:09,020 --> 00:11:13,010
[Charlotte] No, no,
it happens all the time.
237
00:11:14,003 --> 00:11:16,013
You can have it. Take it.
238
00:11:16,007 --> 00:11:17,017
You can say you got it
here at the gallery.
239
00:11:17,020 --> 00:11:22,020
And people will probably think
it's a Jeff Koons.
240
00:11:22,017 --> 00:11:23,017
[laughs]
241
00:11:23,022 --> 00:11:25,022
You are adorable.
242
00:11:26,021 --> 00:11:28,001
What do you think
about closing up
243
00:11:28,004 --> 00:11:29,024
for the rest of the afternoon?
244
00:11:34,023 --> 00:11:37,003
Man, Charlene, you are so hot.
245
00:11:37,006 --> 00:11:38,996
I can't wait to get you to bed.
246
00:11:39,004 --> 00:11:40,014
Um...
247
00:11:40,007 --> 00:11:41,007
Charlotte.
248
00:11:41,011 --> 00:11:42,021
My name is Charlotte.
249
00:11:42,023 --> 00:11:45,003
Oh. I prefer Charlene.
250
00:11:45,004 --> 00:11:47,004
[laughs] Okay.
251
00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:52,010
Oh, man, this champagne
is running through me.
252
00:11:52,015 --> 00:11:55,995
Yo, bud, pull over,
I need to take a leak.
253
00:12:02,005 --> 00:12:03,015
Sit tight, beautiful.
254
00:12:03,023 --> 00:12:05,003
Okay.
255
00:12:11,019 --> 00:12:13,019
[cell phone beeps]
256
00:12:13,022 --> 00:12:14,022
[telephone rings]
257
00:12:14,020 --> 00:12:15,020
[Carrie] Hello?
258
00:12:15,020 --> 00:12:17,020
You'll never believe where I am.
259
00:12:17,017 --> 00:12:21,007
I'm in the back of a limo about
to go have sex with Wylie Ford.
260
00:12:21,016 --> 00:12:22,016
Where is he now?
261
00:12:22,019 --> 00:12:24,009
He's taking a leak out
in the alley.
262
00:12:24,009 --> 00:12:25,019
Isn't that cute?
263
00:12:25,020 --> 00:12:27,000
[Carrie] Yeah, it's adorable.
Now, Charlotte,
264
00:12:27,002 --> 00:12:28,002
listen to me.
265
00:12:28,002 --> 00:12:29,012
Get out of there immediately.
266
00:12:29,015 --> 00:12:31,005
All my rules just went
right out the window.
267
00:12:32,001 --> 00:12:33,011
It's like he wants me.
268
00:12:33,022 --> 00:12:35,002
And I have to obey.
269
00:12:35,004 --> 00:12:38,014
Oh, he's zipping up, I gotta go.
270
00:12:41,002 --> 00:12:42,022
-[Wylie] Hey, hey.
-Hey.
271
00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:51,017
[Carrie] While Charlotte began
to enjoy the perks of celebrity,
272
00:12:51,022 --> 00:12:53,022
Samantha discovered
that Harvey Terkell
273
00:12:53,020 --> 00:12:56,010
came with some nice perks
of his own.
274
00:12:56,015 --> 00:12:59,005
Now, you stay in bed
as long as you want.
275
00:12:59,013 --> 00:13:00,023
And Sum will make you breakfast.
276
00:13:01,001 --> 00:13:03,001
Oh, that's really not necessary.
277
00:13:03,003 --> 00:13:04,003
What? No, no, no.
278
00:13:04,005 --> 00:13:06,005
Wait, please. She loves it.
279
00:13:06,020 --> 00:13:09,000
Do you like fresh orange
or grapefruit?
280
00:13:09,005 --> 00:13:10,015
Hmm. Orange.
281
00:13:10,021 --> 00:13:13,001
-Orange. Eggs?
282
00:13:13,003 --> 00:13:14,023
-Coddled.
-[both laugh]
283
00:13:14,023 --> 00:13:16,013
Coming right up.
284
00:13:19,020 --> 00:13:20,020
I'll call you.
285
00:13:20,020 --> 00:13:22,010
Mm-hmm.
286
00:13:22,011 --> 00:13:24,021
[Carrie] While Samantha didn't
believe in having servants,
287
00:13:24,020 --> 00:13:27,020
she realized she had no problem
dating a man who did.
288
00:13:27,023 --> 00:13:29,023
She knew it might
take some adjusting,
289
00:13:29,019 --> 00:13:31,019
but she could get used to this.
290
00:13:33,015 --> 00:13:34,995
Oh, bye, Sum.
291
00:13:35,006 --> 00:13:37,006
Now, take good care of Samantha.
292
00:13:38,010 --> 00:13:41,020
-Bye, bye, Mr. Harvey.
-Oh, yes.
293
00:13:42,006 --> 00:13:43,006
Okay.
294
00:13:47,022 --> 00:13:50,012
Okay, lazy bones, out of bed.
295
00:13:50,014 --> 00:13:51,024
[Samantha screams] Excuse me?
296
00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:53,010
Up, up, must wash sheets.
297
00:13:53,013 --> 00:13:54,013
Okay.
298
00:13:55,002 --> 00:13:57,002
Should I have my breakfast
in the dining room, or...
299
00:13:57,006 --> 00:14:00,006
Breakfast? I got no time
to make breakfast.
300
00:14:00,008 --> 00:14:02,018
Got a lot of work
to do around here.
301
00:14:04,007 --> 00:14:06,007
[cursing in Thai]
302
00:14:06,016 --> 00:14:08,006
[Carrie] It was then
that Samantha realized
303
00:14:08,015 --> 00:14:11,015
that Sum was not so
servile after all.
304
00:14:11,020 --> 00:14:13,020
That afternoon,
during her lunch break,
305
00:14:14,001 --> 00:14:15,021
Miranda took Steve shopping.
306
00:14:15,020 --> 00:14:17,010
-Thank you.
-You're welcome.
307
00:14:17,016 --> 00:14:18,016
What do you think?
308
00:14:19,003 --> 00:14:21,013
I think it's kind of
frightening how good I look.
309
00:14:21,015 --> 00:14:23,005
[Miranda] It's a beautiful suit.
310
00:14:23,018 --> 00:14:25,008
I think we should take it.
311
00:14:26,001 --> 00:14:28,011
Could you do a cuff
with a nice little break?
312
00:14:28,007 --> 00:14:29,007
[tailor]
Will these be the shoes?
313
00:14:29,018 --> 00:14:31,008
I think we should
take the shoes.
314
00:14:31,021 --> 00:14:33,021
Don't you think we
should take the shoes?
315
00:14:34,007 --> 00:14:36,007
I guess we're taking the shoes.
316
00:14:38,015 --> 00:14:40,015
Uh-huh. Yeah. Just like that.
317
00:14:42,003 --> 00:14:43,013
Jesus.
318
00:14:43,014 --> 00:14:44,024
Eighteen hundred bucks.
319
00:14:45,008 --> 00:14:47,018
I guess I better
not spill anything.
320
00:14:49,012 --> 00:14:51,022
Don't worry. It's my treat.
321
00:14:52,016 --> 00:14:53,006
What?
322
00:14:53,016 --> 00:14:54,016
I invited you to this thing,
323
00:14:54,023 --> 00:14:56,003
I want to pay for the suit.
324
00:14:56,004 --> 00:14:58,024
No way, you're not
buying me a suit.
325
00:15:04,012 --> 00:15:06,022
But I wanted to do this for you.
326
00:15:07,012 --> 00:15:09,012
Then I start to think
of you like my mother.
327
00:15:09,016 --> 00:15:12,006
And that can get
a little weird for me.
328
00:15:13,003 --> 00:15:14,023
Sorry, sir, it was declined.
329
00:15:15,001 --> 00:15:16,011
Would you like
to try another one?
330
00:15:16,014 --> 00:15:17,024
Why don't you try one of mine?
331
00:15:17,018 --> 00:15:19,018
No, no, no. How about this?
332
00:15:20,011 --> 00:15:23,001
Let's try $800 on the card, I'll
write you a check for $1,000,
333
00:15:23,005 --> 00:15:24,015
and I'll give you
the rest in cash.
334
00:15:24,021 --> 00:15:27,001
[Miranda] Steve, forget it.
It's too expensive.
335
00:15:27,005 --> 00:15:30,005
Would you just let me
buy the fucking suit?
336
00:15:31,013 --> 00:15:33,023
[sighs]
337
00:15:35,015 --> 00:15:38,995
[Carrie] That Saturday,
Big took me to a cocktail party
338
00:15:39,005 --> 00:15:40,995
at the home of Serena Bush.
339
00:15:41,005 --> 00:15:43,005
Great purse, fabulous.
340
00:15:43,011 --> 00:15:44,021
Careful.
341
00:15:44,021 --> 00:15:46,011
White rugs.
342
00:15:46,009 --> 00:15:47,019
[Carrie] An Upper East Side
hostess
343
00:15:47,018 --> 00:15:49,008
famous for her husband's money
344
00:15:49,007 --> 00:15:51,017
and a close personal
friendship with Tina Brown.
345
00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:53,010
I used to know her ten years ago
346
00:15:53,010 --> 00:15:55,010
when she was famous
for her father's money
347
00:15:55,008 --> 00:15:57,998
and a close personal friendship
with her drug dealer.
348
00:15:58,007 --> 00:16:00,017
Oh, God, I hate Park Avenue.
349
00:16:00,021 --> 00:16:03,011
It's like being
in a foreign country.
350
00:16:03,017 --> 00:16:05,997
Just think of me as
your passport, baby.
351
00:16:06,005 --> 00:16:07,015
[Carrie] As we walked
through the room
352
00:16:07,023 --> 00:16:10,013
of women clutching their
bejeweled swan kitten
353
00:16:10,008 --> 00:16:12,008
and asparagus purses,
354
00:16:12,011 --> 00:16:14,001
I realized, to my horror,
355
00:16:14,006 --> 00:16:16,006
that not only
did Big not love me,
356
00:16:16,007 --> 00:16:19,997
he had absolutely
no idea who I was.
357
00:16:20,003 --> 00:16:21,003
Can I get you a drink?
358
00:16:21,004 --> 00:16:22,024
Yeah, Tanqueray and tonic.
359
00:16:22,022 --> 00:16:24,002
Carrie, a drink?
360
00:16:24,014 --> 00:16:27,014
Oh, red wine please.
361
00:16:27,015 --> 00:16:31,005
I'm sorry, Miss Bush doesn't
serve any brown food or drink.
362
00:16:31,022 --> 00:16:33,012
Can I get you something clear?
363
00:16:35,019 --> 00:16:37,009
Uh... yeah.
364
00:16:37,021 --> 00:16:39,001
Vodka on the rocks.
365
00:16:41,008 --> 00:16:43,008
No brown food?
366
00:16:43,014 --> 00:16:45,024
I think we've just encountered
a mutant strain
367
00:16:45,023 --> 00:16:47,023
of Upper East Side anal.
368
00:16:48,004 --> 00:16:49,014
She's a little strange.
369
00:16:49,009 --> 00:16:50,019
I've known her for years.
She's okay.
370
00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:52,000
Oh, yeah, I'm sure
she's fabulous
371
00:16:52,004 --> 00:16:53,014
until you spill something.
372
00:16:53,011 --> 00:16:54,021
It's like she's
consciously trying
373
00:16:54,022 --> 00:16:57,002
to cultivate an eccentricity
so people won't notice
374
00:16:57,004 --> 00:16:59,024
that she's completely
devoid of personality.
375
00:17:00,012 --> 00:17:01,022
Well, don't be a bitch.
376
00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:03,010
I'm not being a bitch,
I'm just being myself.
377
00:17:03,011 --> 00:17:05,001
You're being a little bit
of a bitch.
378
00:17:05,004 --> 00:17:06,014
Sweetheart.
379
00:17:06,021 --> 00:17:08,001
-How are you?
-Hey!
380
00:17:08,002 --> 00:17:10,002
It's been forever.
381
00:17:11,023 --> 00:17:13,013
[Big] Thank you for having us.
382
00:17:13,015 --> 00:17:15,005
Serena, you know Carrie.
383
00:17:15,015 --> 00:17:16,015
Yes.
384
00:17:16,023 --> 00:17:18,003
Hey.
385
00:17:18,013 --> 00:17:19,023
[Serena] Uh, darling...
386
00:17:20,014 --> 00:17:21,024
can't smoke in here.
387
00:17:21,020 --> 00:17:24,010
No, no. Terrace.
388
00:17:24,017 --> 00:17:27,007
Then that's where I'll be.
389
00:17:27,015 --> 00:17:32,015
[Carrie] And just like that, I
was cast out of the fancy party.
390
00:17:32,018 --> 00:17:35,008
That same evening, Charlotte
found herself the newest member
391
00:17:35,016 --> 00:17:37,006
of Wylie Ford's entourage.
392
00:17:37,016 --> 00:17:41,006
When did marijuana become legal
in restaurants?
393
00:17:42,019 --> 00:17:43,999
It didn't.
394
00:17:46,020 --> 00:17:48,020
-Here.
-Oh, no, thank you.
395
00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:51,000
[giggles] I don't smoke pot.
396
00:17:55,003 --> 00:17:57,003
-[Charlotte coughs]
-You do now.
397
00:17:57,003 --> 00:17:58,023
[everyone laughs]
398
00:18:09,010 --> 00:18:10,010
You know...
399
00:18:10,018 --> 00:18:13,008
Sum was very rude to me
the other morning.
400
00:18:13,016 --> 00:18:16,006
She practically
threw me out of bed.
401
00:18:16,022 --> 00:18:18,002
No, no, no.
402
00:18:18,008 --> 00:18:19,008
You must have misunderstood.
403
00:18:19,013 --> 00:18:21,023
Her English
isn't really that good.
404
00:18:21,018 --> 00:18:22,998
Shh, shh.
405
00:18:26,002 --> 00:18:28,002
More asparagus, miss?
406
00:18:28,002 --> 00:18:34,012
[Carrie] It was then Samantha
realized she wasn't so dim,
that Sum.
407
00:18:34,009 --> 00:18:37,019
That night I realized that
relationships had a caste system
of their own.
408
00:18:38,001 --> 00:18:40,011
There's the person
who says I love you.
409
00:18:40,009 --> 00:18:42,019
And there's the person
who never responds.
410
00:18:42,021 --> 00:18:43,021
[man] Carrie.
411
00:18:44,021 --> 00:18:45,021
Hey.
412
00:18:46,008 --> 00:18:47,018
Jeremiah.
413
00:18:48,003 --> 00:18:49,013
What are you doing here?
414
00:18:50,003 --> 00:18:51,023
Purveying the beverages.
415
00:18:52,004 --> 00:18:54,024
-Just snuck out here
to smoke, actually.
-Ah, good.
416
00:18:54,022 --> 00:18:57,012
Are you friends
with these people?
417
00:18:57,009 --> 00:18:58,019
Oh, God, no. No.
418
00:18:58,022 --> 00:19:00,012
Yeah. A little uptight.
419
00:19:00,012 --> 00:19:02,012
What's with
the no brown food deal?
420
00:19:02,007 --> 00:19:03,017
Whatever.
421
00:19:03,018 --> 00:19:06,008
Jeremiah was a famous downtown
performance artist
422
00:19:06,009 --> 00:19:07,019
who was best known uptown as,
423
00:19:08,001 --> 00:19:10,001
"Hey kid, let me have
another scotch and soda."
424
00:19:10,002 --> 00:19:12,022
We had engaged in a mild
flirtation for years.
425
00:19:13,004 --> 00:19:14,014
So, who are you here with?
426
00:19:14,012 --> 00:19:17,002
Oh, some guy.
427
00:19:18,012 --> 00:19:20,012
Hey. I just got a new tattoo,
you want to see it?
428
00:19:20,014 --> 00:19:21,024
-Yeah.
-Yeah?
429
00:19:21,020 --> 00:19:22,020
Sure.
430
00:19:25,007 --> 00:19:25,997
Is that real?
431
00:19:26,006 --> 00:19:27,006
Yeah, it's real.
432
00:19:27,009 --> 00:19:28,019
Wowsa.
433
00:19:28,018 --> 00:19:30,018
How far down does that go?
434
00:19:32,012 --> 00:19:33,022
Pretty far.
435
00:19:34,006 --> 00:19:35,006
Check it out.
436
00:19:39,000 --> 00:19:40,000
[Carrie] Oh.
437
00:19:41,010 --> 00:19:42,010
Holy moly.
438
00:19:42,016 --> 00:19:45,006
-Ahem.
-Shit.
439
00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:47,020
Excuse me.
440
00:19:49,019 --> 00:19:50,999
Ah, shit.
441
00:20:08,023 --> 00:20:10,003
Uh...
442
00:20:10,020 --> 00:20:13,000
Were you really out there giving
the caterer a blow job?
443
00:20:13,006 --> 00:20:15,006
First of all,
he's not a caterer.
444
00:20:15,015 --> 00:20:17,015
He's a very well-known
performance artist.
445
00:20:17,021 --> 00:20:18,021
Oh!
446
00:20:19,001 --> 00:20:21,001
Well, that didn't
answer my question.
447
00:20:21,003 --> 00:20:22,023
Because it was offensive.
448
00:20:23,015 --> 00:20:27,005
Well, whatever you were doing,
please stop.
449
00:20:27,013 --> 00:20:28,023
You're embarrassing me.
450
00:20:28,022 --> 00:20:30,022
I'm embarrassing you?
451
00:20:30,021 --> 00:20:33,011
Well, maybe if you'd join me
on the terrace like a gentleman
452
00:20:33,013 --> 00:20:36,013
we wouldn't be standing here
having this conversation.
453
00:20:36,010 --> 00:20:37,010
Let's just go.
454
00:20:37,013 --> 00:20:40,003
No, you go,
I'm having a good time.
455
00:20:45,004 --> 00:20:48,024
And across town, Miranda
was late for the firm dinner.
456
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:50,020
[doorbell rings]
457
00:20:50,023 --> 00:20:52,013
Okay.
458
00:20:58,018 --> 00:21:00,008
Why are you dressed like that?
459
00:21:00,020 --> 00:21:02,020
I returned the suit.
460
00:21:03,017 --> 00:21:05,017
Frankly, I couldn't afford it.
461
00:21:06,015 --> 00:21:08,015
Then why didn't you
let me pay for it?
462
00:21:08,022 --> 00:21:13,022
Miranda, you need to be with
a guy who's more on your level.
463
00:21:14,007 --> 00:21:14,997
Steve.
464
00:21:15,005 --> 00:21:16,015
Being in that store with you,
465
00:21:18,004 --> 00:21:20,014
I didn't feel good about myself.
466
00:21:21,013 --> 00:21:24,013
Look, I think you're
an incredible lady.
467
00:21:25,002 --> 00:21:27,022
You want to break up
with me over a suit?
468
00:21:29,001 --> 00:21:30,021
Fuck the suit.
469
00:21:31,015 --> 00:21:33,005
It's not just the suit.
470
00:21:34,011 --> 00:21:37,001
There's always gonna be things
out of my reach.
471
00:21:38,021 --> 00:21:41,011
So I'm being punished
for being successful.
472
00:21:43,001 --> 00:21:44,021
That's not how I mean it.
473
00:21:46,012 --> 00:21:47,012
Got it.
474
00:21:48,006 --> 00:21:49,006
Well...
475
00:21:50,002 --> 00:21:52,022
thanks for the info
and standing me up.
476
00:21:52,019 --> 00:21:54,009
And it's been nice knowing you.
477
00:21:54,015 --> 00:21:55,005
[door slams]
478
00:21:55,013 --> 00:21:56,023
[Carrie] An hour later,
479
00:21:56,021 --> 00:21:59,021
adrift in a sea
of Italian wool crepe,
480
00:21:59,018 --> 00:22:03,008
Miranda wondered what was really
so wrong with corduroy anyway.
481
00:22:07,007 --> 00:22:08,017
In the space of one evening,
482
00:22:08,022 --> 00:22:12,022
Charlotte had gone
from girlfriend to groupie.
483
00:22:13,008 --> 00:22:14,018
Who had the rum and Coke?
484
00:22:27,009 --> 00:22:29,009
Listen... Charlene.
485
00:22:29,023 --> 00:22:32,003
I want you to do
something for me.
486
00:22:32,020 --> 00:22:34,020
I want you to go
to the ladies' room,
487
00:22:35,004 --> 00:22:40,024
stick your finger in your pussy,
come back, and let me smell it.
488
00:22:45,010 --> 00:22:46,020
[Charlotte laughs]
489
00:22:49,002 --> 00:22:50,022
I don't think so.
490
00:22:54,020 --> 00:22:56,010
-Excuse me.
-Charlene?
491
00:22:56,015 --> 00:22:58,995
[Carrie] Charlotte realized
another moment at the top
492
00:22:59,002 --> 00:23:01,012
and she would have become
an untouchable.
493
00:23:01,021 --> 00:23:03,011
[Wylie laughs]
494
00:23:03,011 --> 00:23:06,011
♪ Jeremiah was a bullfrog ♪
495
00:23:06,007 --> 00:23:07,007
♪ Bah, bah, bah ♪
496
00:23:07,008 --> 00:23:09,008
♪ Was a good friend of mine ♪
497
00:23:09,013 --> 00:23:10,023
♪ Bah, bah, bah ♪
498
00:23:10,022 --> 00:23:14,002
♪ I never understood
A single word he said ♪
499
00:23:14,003 --> 00:23:15,013
♪ But I helped him... ♪
500
00:23:15,007 --> 00:23:17,007
[Carrie] After Jeremiah
got fired,
501
00:23:17,015 --> 00:23:18,015
we celebrated downtown
502
00:23:18,022 --> 00:23:21,002
with a couple
of pitchers of margaritas.
503
00:23:21,003 --> 00:23:23,013
♪ Joy to the world ♪
504
00:23:23,011 --> 00:23:24,011
Yeah!
505
00:23:24,011 --> 00:23:27,001
♪ All the boys and girls ♪
506
00:23:28,006 --> 00:23:29,016
♪ Joy to... ♪
507
00:23:36,020 --> 00:23:39,010
♪ Joy to the fishes
In the deep blue sea ♪
508
00:23:39,015 --> 00:23:41,005
I don't live here. Whoa. Whoa!
509
00:23:41,012 --> 00:23:42,022
♪ Joy to you and me ♪
510
00:23:42,023 --> 00:23:45,013
That was the last thing
I could remember that night.
511
00:23:45,008 --> 00:23:47,998
♪ If I were
the king of the world ♪
512
00:23:48,002 --> 00:23:49,022
-[Samantha sighs]
-[Harvey gasps]
513
00:23:50,013 --> 00:23:51,023
[both laugh]
514
00:23:53,004 --> 00:23:54,024
-You just relax.
-I will.
515
00:23:55,001 --> 00:23:56,021
I'm gonna go grab a shower.
516
00:23:56,022 --> 00:23:58,002
Oh.
517
00:23:59,007 --> 00:24:00,017
[Samantha sighs contentedly]
518
00:24:01,003 --> 00:24:02,013
[door slams open]
519
00:24:05,003 --> 00:24:06,013
Excuse me.
520
00:24:07,005 --> 00:24:08,005
Nasty.
521
00:24:09,000 --> 00:24:10,010
Nasty girl.
522
00:24:10,021 --> 00:24:13,011
You dirty cock-sucking whore.
523
00:24:15,000 --> 00:24:17,010
Must wash sheets right away.
524
00:24:17,013 --> 00:24:19,023
Stop it! Let go.
525
00:24:20,001 --> 00:24:22,001
You're crazy. Oh!
526
00:24:22,006 --> 00:24:23,016
What's going on out here?
527
00:24:24,013 --> 00:24:26,013
[Sum] Mr. Harvey.
528
00:24:26,009 --> 00:24:28,009
I'm so sorry.
529
00:24:28,022 --> 00:24:33,012
I just tried to wash the sheets,
but that lady hit me.
530
00:24:33,011 --> 00:24:35,001
Oh, come on!
531
00:24:35,003 --> 00:24:37,003
How dare you treat Sum that way.
532
00:24:37,004 --> 00:24:38,014
Let me explain.
533
00:24:38,011 --> 00:24:39,011
[Harvey] No!
534
00:24:39,014 --> 00:24:41,014
There's no explanation.
535
00:24:42,002 --> 00:24:44,022
Just get out of here.
536
00:24:44,018 --> 00:24:46,018
[Carrie] Samantha realized that
there was only room
537
00:24:46,022 --> 00:24:48,002
for one woman in Harvey's life.
538
00:24:48,005 --> 00:24:48,995
Shh, shh.
539
00:24:50,006 --> 00:24:51,006
[telephone rings]
540
00:24:53,006 --> 00:24:54,006
[ringing continues]
541
00:24:54,012 --> 00:24:55,012
Oh, Jesus.
542
00:24:59,002 --> 00:25:00,012
Hello?
543
00:25:00,010 --> 00:25:01,010
[Big] Listen...
544
00:25:01,019 --> 00:25:03,999
I know what you're
really pissed off about.
545
00:25:04,018 --> 00:25:08,018
But it's just something
I've gotta do in my own time.
546
00:25:10,012 --> 00:25:11,012
Okay?
547
00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:16,000
Well, I fucking love you.
548
00:25:16,002 --> 00:25:18,012
All right? You know I do.
549
00:25:18,019 --> 00:25:19,019
Hey, good morning.
550
00:25:20,001 --> 00:25:23,001
[Big] It's just a tough
thing for me to say
551
00:25:23,020 --> 00:25:28,000
because it always seems to get
me in trouble when I say it.
552
00:25:28,017 --> 00:25:29,017
Okay?
553
00:25:30,019 --> 00:25:31,019
Okay.
554
00:25:33,006 --> 00:25:34,016
Are we okay?
555
00:25:36,018 --> 00:25:37,018
We're great.
556
00:25:39,005 --> 00:25:40,015
Hey, I love you too.
557
00:25:41,010 --> 00:25:43,000
I'll call you later, okay?
558
00:25:48,011 --> 00:25:49,021
[Carrie sighs]
559
00:25:52,014 --> 00:25:53,024
Did we?
560
00:25:56,002 --> 00:25:57,022
Definitely not.
561
00:25:58,014 --> 00:26:00,004
I didn't think so.
562
00:26:06,020 --> 00:26:09,020
I felt like I was
the lowest of the low.
563
00:26:09,019 --> 00:26:11,009
But I never told Mr. Big.
564
00:26:11,008 --> 00:26:13,008
I figured everything
before "I love you"
565
00:26:13,016 --> 00:26:14,016
just doesn't count.