1 00:00:49,001 --> 00:00:51,021 [Carrie] Despite the fact that there are over eight million people 2 00:00:51,020 --> 00:00:53,010 on the island of Manhattan, 3 00:00:53,014 --> 00:00:57,024 there are times when you still feel shipwrecked and alone. 4 00:00:58,001 --> 00:01:00,011 Times when even the most resourceful survivor 5 00:01:00,008 --> 00:01:02,018 will feel the need to put a message in a bottle 6 00:01:02,021 --> 00:01:04,011 or on an answering machine. 7 00:01:06,001 --> 00:01:07,021 [Aidan on machine] Hey, this is Aidan. I'm not in. 8 00:01:07,021 --> 00:01:10,001 -Leave a message. -[machine beeps] 9 00:01:10,004 --> 00:01:12,004 [screams] 10 00:01:12,005 --> 00:01:14,015 [rhythmic drumbeating] 11 00:01:19,001 --> 00:01:20,011 Ah, yes! 12 00:01:20,013 --> 00:01:22,023 Strong arms, strong arms. 13 00:01:22,022 --> 00:01:24,012 Earth to heaven. Yes! 14 00:01:24,013 --> 00:01:27,013 Remember, every movement has a meaning. 15 00:01:27,010 --> 00:01:28,020 [Carrie] I couldn't help but wonder what it meant 16 00:01:29,001 --> 00:01:31,011 that I wanted to talk to my ex-boyfriend again. 17 00:01:31,009 --> 00:01:33,019 I've been making "faux" calls to Aidan. 18 00:01:33,023 --> 00:01:36,013 -What? -Faux, F-A-U-X. 19 00:01:36,008 --> 00:01:37,018 You know, when you dial, but you have no idea 20 00:01:37,018 --> 00:01:38,018 what you'd say if he actually answered. 21 00:01:38,022 --> 00:01:40,022 It's emotional Russian roulette. 22 00:01:40,020 --> 00:01:43,000 You, you mean, you call, and you hang up? 23 00:01:43,004 --> 00:01:44,014 Ah, yeah, that's pretty much the drill. 24 00:01:44,016 --> 00:01:46,006 -Why would you do that? -I don't know. 25 00:01:46,012 --> 00:01:47,022 I don't even know why I'm telling you. 26 00:01:47,021 --> 00:01:49,001 Don't tell anybody else. 27 00:01:49,005 --> 00:01:51,995 [tribal music] 28 00:01:52,005 --> 00:01:53,995 Carrie, tell them what you told me. 29 00:01:54,005 --> 00:01:56,005 That I'm not going to your African dance class ever again? 30 00:01:56,013 --> 00:01:58,023 Or that you can't keep a secret? 31 00:01:58,019 --> 00:02:00,009 Carrie's calling Aidan. 32 00:02:00,010 --> 00:02:01,020 And hanging up! 33 00:02:01,017 --> 00:02:03,007 Why are you calling him? 34 00:02:03,020 --> 00:02:04,020 I... 35 00:02:05,019 --> 00:02:07,019 I think I want him back. 36 00:02:09,004 --> 00:02:10,014 How do I do this? 37 00:02:10,016 --> 00:02:12,016 Well, first you have to be willing to accept the fact 38 00:02:12,019 --> 00:02:14,999 that after what happened, he might not want to hear it. 39 00:02:15,004 --> 00:02:17,014 I am willing to accept that fact. How do I do this? 40 00:02:17,011 --> 00:02:19,021 You don't. One word, honey: granola. 41 00:02:19,023 --> 00:02:20,023 So not you. 42 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:22,000 Aidan's perfect! 43 00:02:22,003 --> 00:02:23,013 He stripped her floors. 44 00:02:23,014 --> 00:02:25,024 He just needs to get rid of the turquoise rings and the tummy. 45 00:02:25,023 --> 00:02:27,013 Oh, the tummy is gone. 46 00:02:27,011 --> 00:02:29,011 At that thing last week, he looked... 47 00:02:29,015 --> 00:02:30,995 disturbingly good. 48 00:02:31,005 --> 00:02:32,005 He's the new, improved Aidan. 49 00:02:32,011 --> 00:02:33,021 Low-fat granola. 50 00:02:33,018 --> 00:02:36,008 Yeah, yeah, yeah. He looks good, he looks good. 51 00:02:36,007 --> 00:02:37,997 But that's not why I want him back, though. 52 00:02:38,006 --> 00:02:39,006 I just miss him. 53 00:02:39,007 --> 00:02:40,017 Did you miss him before you saw him? 54 00:02:40,021 --> 00:02:42,021 -What about the turquoise? -I miss him. 55 00:02:43,001 --> 00:02:45,011 I've missed him for months. 56 00:02:47,010 --> 00:02:50,020 Okay, you need a safe approach in case he rejects you. 57 00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:52,000 E-mail him. 58 00:02:52,002 --> 00:02:53,022 No, I don't-- I don't believe in e-mail, 59 00:02:53,020 --> 00:02:56,010 I'm an old-fashioned gal. I prefer calling and hanging up. 60 00:02:56,013 --> 00:02:58,013 Oh, come on, honey, you gotta get online, 61 00:02:58,009 --> 00:02:59,009 if only for the porn. 62 00:02:59,016 --> 00:03:01,016 Yeah, um, would you please stop sending me those? 63 00:03:01,020 --> 00:03:03,020 Oh, come on, it's funny. [laughs] 64 00:03:04,001 --> 00:03:06,011 I can't get e-mail just to write to Aidan. 65 00:03:06,009 --> 00:03:07,009 That's pathetic. 66 00:03:07,015 --> 00:03:09,005 It's not just e-mail. You can shop online. 67 00:03:09,016 --> 00:03:11,006 Oh, no, no, no, shopping is my cardio. 68 00:03:11,007 --> 00:03:13,007 Okay, okay, I know what you do. 69 00:03:13,016 --> 00:03:15,016 Don't call him. Don't e-mail. 70 00:03:15,019 --> 00:03:18,009 Just show up at his furniture store... 71 00:03:19,011 --> 00:03:20,021 wearing these. 72 00:03:20,017 --> 00:03:22,997 -Ew! What are those? -Fake nipples. 73 00:03:23,003 --> 00:03:25,013 And why are we carrying them around? 74 00:03:25,008 --> 00:03:27,018 They were sent to me as some kind of promotional thing. 75 00:03:27,018 --> 00:03:29,008 Really? Is there a nipple council? 76 00:03:29,012 --> 00:03:30,022 Are nipples getting a bad rap? 77 00:03:31,001 --> 00:03:33,001 Nipples are huge right now. 78 00:03:33,006 --> 00:03:35,016 Open any magazine. It's not that cold. 79 00:03:35,021 --> 00:03:39,001 Those girls are either tweaking or they're wearing these. 80 00:03:39,002 --> 00:03:40,022 Sam, put 'em in. I want to see how they work. 81 00:03:40,018 --> 00:03:42,008 No, no, no, Samantha already leads with her breasts. 82 00:03:42,011 --> 00:03:44,001 That's not a very good experiment. 83 00:03:44,003 --> 00:03:45,013 Miranda, you try them. 84 00:03:45,012 --> 00:03:48,022 Oh, yeah! Now that I'd like to see. 85 00:03:48,021 --> 00:03:52,021 I'm not certain, but I have a feeling my boobs were just insulted. 86 00:03:52,023 --> 00:03:54,013 All right, cover me. 87 00:03:54,015 --> 00:03:55,015 That's it. 88 00:03:56,001 --> 00:03:57,011 Ooh! 89 00:03:57,012 --> 00:03:58,022 That's obscene. 90 00:03:58,017 --> 00:03:59,017 Okay, walk. 91 00:04:03,005 --> 00:04:05,015 We have secretly replaced Miranda's normal nipples 92 00:04:05,021 --> 00:04:06,021 with rubber ones. 93 00:04:06,023 --> 00:04:08,013 Let's see what happens. 94 00:04:14,004 --> 00:04:16,014 Okay, that's it. I want my nipples back. 95 00:04:16,015 --> 00:04:18,015 [Carrie] The next day, sans nipples, 96 00:04:18,021 --> 00:04:21,021 Miranda's cardio put my cardio to shame. 97 00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:24,010 She was training for the marathon. 98 00:04:24,009 --> 00:04:25,019 And running wasn't the only thing 99 00:04:25,021 --> 00:04:26,021 getting her heart rate going. 100 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:28,010 Are you sure you're in the right group? 101 00:04:28,011 --> 00:04:29,021 Ten-minute mile, right? 102 00:04:29,022 --> 00:04:31,002 I was here last week. 103 00:04:31,002 --> 00:04:33,012 Yeah, I know, but the thing is, um... 104 00:04:33,011 --> 00:04:35,001 we never get any cute guys in this group. 105 00:04:35,006 --> 00:04:37,016 All the cute guys are in the seven-minute mile group. 106 00:04:37,022 --> 00:04:40,022 So I'm the cutest of the slow guys, is what you're saying? 107 00:04:40,021 --> 00:04:41,021 [laughs] 108 00:04:41,018 --> 00:04:42,018 Knee surgery. 109 00:04:42,018 --> 00:04:43,018 Oh. 110 00:04:45,007 --> 00:04:46,997 Have you run the marathon before? 111 00:04:47,002 --> 00:04:48,012 Past four years. 112 00:04:48,009 --> 00:04:49,999 -Wow. -What about you? 113 00:04:50,005 --> 00:04:51,005 Oh, first time. 114 00:04:51,011 --> 00:04:53,001 Cool. 115 00:04:53,003 --> 00:04:54,023 We should train during the week. 116 00:04:54,019 --> 00:04:56,009 Are there runs during the week? 117 00:04:56,007 --> 00:04:57,017 I don't know. 118 00:04:57,017 --> 00:04:58,017 I meant just the two of us. 119 00:04:59,001 --> 00:05:00,011 Oh, sure. 120 00:05:00,011 --> 00:05:01,011 That'd be great. 121 00:05:01,015 --> 00:05:03,005 [Carrie] Miranda was thrilled. 122 00:05:03,014 --> 00:05:05,014 But she still wasn't sure 123 00:05:05,012 --> 00:05:08,012 if he was interested in anything more than a running buddy. 124 00:05:08,013 --> 00:05:10,013 -[whistle blows] -[coach] Stay alive. Stay alive. 125 00:05:10,014 --> 00:05:11,024 [Carrie] And Uptown, 126 00:05:11,021 --> 00:05:14,011 Charlotte's marathon redecoration continued. 127 00:05:14,014 --> 00:05:17,024 I can't believe I ever questioned this wallpaper. 128 00:05:17,019 --> 00:05:19,009 I love this wallpaper. 129 00:05:20,003 --> 00:05:21,003 And I love you. 130 00:05:21,004 --> 00:05:22,014 Oh. 131 00:05:24,005 --> 00:05:25,995 Well, I guess we're done with this room. 132 00:05:26,003 --> 00:05:26,023 Mm-hmm. 133 00:05:26,022 --> 00:05:28,022 Time to move on to the study. 134 00:05:30,001 --> 00:05:31,021 [Carrie] There's one room in every marriage 135 00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:33,010 that forces the question... 136 00:05:33,016 --> 00:05:37,006 How long do we want it to be just the two of us? 137 00:05:37,011 --> 00:05:39,021 It's right off our bedroom, so... 138 00:05:40,021 --> 00:05:42,011 Well... 139 00:05:42,015 --> 00:05:44,005 What do you want to do with this room? 140 00:05:44,007 --> 00:05:46,017 Well, it could be a good room for a... 141 00:05:47,016 --> 00:05:49,016 B-A-... 142 00:05:50,013 --> 00:05:52,013 ...B-Y? 143 00:05:52,014 --> 00:05:54,024 I think we already have enough bathrooms. 144 00:05:57,013 --> 00:06:00,013 [Carrie] Trey and Charlotte were finally on the same page, 145 00:06:00,016 --> 00:06:03,016 and the page had a baby on it. 146 00:06:03,018 --> 00:06:06,998 Meanwhile, Samantha went shopping, nipples blazing, 147 00:06:07,005 --> 00:06:10,995 and picked up a '94 Cabernet and an '84 Harvard MBA. 148 00:06:11,004 --> 00:06:12,024 [Warren] Believe me, this is nothing. 149 00:06:12,022 --> 00:06:14,012 It's a blip. 150 00:06:14,011 --> 00:06:17,011 No, we can't retract it, because that's what you said. 151 00:06:17,013 --> 00:06:19,003 [Carrie] Warren Dreyfous was a founding partner 152 00:06:19,005 --> 00:06:20,015 of the communication strategy firm 153 00:06:20,018 --> 00:06:24,008 that made the Exxon oil spill an "incident" 154 00:06:24,007 --> 00:06:25,017 rather than a "debacle." 155 00:06:26,000 --> 00:06:28,010 Look, I've got to go. Yeah. 156 00:06:28,009 --> 00:06:31,019 And next time, talk to me before you talk to the press. 157 00:06:31,017 --> 00:06:33,007 All right, man. Bye. 158 00:06:33,016 --> 00:06:34,016 Sorry about that. 159 00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:38,010 About talking on the phone or staring at my nipples? 160 00:06:38,012 --> 00:06:40,012 About talking on the phone. 161 00:06:42,023 --> 00:06:44,023 [moaning] 162 00:06:49,004 --> 00:06:52,014 [Carrie] That night, I tried to compose my first e-mail, 163 00:06:52,012 --> 00:06:54,002 a witty, yet sexy, 164 00:06:54,005 --> 00:06:56,005 yet sensitive note, to Aidan. 165 00:07:14,019 --> 00:07:16,009 Ah! 166 00:07:16,011 --> 00:07:17,021 And across town, 167 00:07:17,017 --> 00:07:20,007 Samantha was getting some "male" as well. 168 00:07:20,013 --> 00:07:21,023 [moaning] 169 00:07:22,016 --> 00:07:23,996 Oh. 170 00:07:25,023 --> 00:07:28,023 [Carrie] As a lover, Warren was fantastic. 171 00:07:28,021 --> 00:07:31,001 But as a communication strategist, 172 00:07:31,002 --> 00:07:33,002 he made one major mistake. 173 00:07:33,005 --> 00:07:37,005 [baby talk] Samanfa, does your 'gina-wina wanna wittle visit 174 00:07:37,014 --> 00:07:40,004 from my mister mister? 175 00:07:44,003 --> 00:07:45,003 -Ick! -No! 176 00:07:45,003 --> 00:07:46,013 He didn't say that. 177 00:07:46,013 --> 00:07:49,003 It's not what he said, it's how he said it. 178 00:07:49,005 --> 00:07:51,015 -In baby talk. -Ugh! Baby talk's the worst. 179 00:07:51,017 --> 00:07:52,017 How can they think it's sexy? 180 00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:56,010 It's like, it's like putting ketchup on prime rib. 181 00:07:56,011 --> 00:07:57,021 Stop, you're ruining it! 182 00:07:57,023 --> 00:08:00,023 I know, and it's such a shame because this guy is hot. 183 00:08:01,001 --> 00:08:03,021 I finally had to sit on his face just to shut him up. 184 00:08:03,020 --> 00:08:06,010 You know, some men use baby talk to avoid intimacy. 185 00:08:06,016 --> 00:08:09,996 While others simply choose not to respond to your e-mail. 186 00:08:10,002 --> 00:08:11,012 Aidan still hasn't written back? 187 00:08:11,011 --> 00:08:13,001 Ah, 14 hours, but who's counting? 188 00:08:13,006 --> 00:08:15,006 [gasps] Oh, my God! 189 00:08:15,013 --> 00:08:16,023 Oh! 190 00:08:16,022 --> 00:08:18,012 Isn't this adorable? 191 00:08:18,014 --> 00:08:21,024 Don't you think that maybe it's a wee bit small? 192 00:08:21,017 --> 00:08:23,997 Oh, you guys. 193 00:08:24,004 --> 00:08:26,014 Trey and I are trying to have a baby. 194 00:08:27,015 --> 00:08:28,015 Why? 195 00:08:28,018 --> 00:08:30,998 Don't you think that maybe you should wait awhile? 196 00:08:31,005 --> 00:08:32,015 I mean, you guys just got back together. 197 00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:37,000 I can't wait. I'm the oldest woman I know who doesn't have a baby. 198 00:08:37,003 --> 00:08:40,023 The oldest married woman who wants one. You know what I mean. 199 00:08:40,018 --> 00:08:42,998 Sweetie, if that's what you want, I'm very happy for you. 200 00:08:43,004 --> 00:08:44,024 -Thanks. -You're welcome. 201 00:08:44,021 --> 00:08:47,011 And I promise I won't become one of those mothers 202 00:08:47,015 --> 00:08:49,015 who can only talk about diaper genies. 203 00:08:49,020 --> 00:08:51,010 Good! 204 00:08:52,005 --> 00:08:53,995 Ooh, look over here! 205 00:08:54,003 --> 00:08:55,023 What the hell's a diaper genie? 206 00:08:55,019 --> 00:08:59,009 I don't know. Someone you hire to change a kid's diaper? 207 00:08:59,007 --> 00:09:00,017 Hmm. 208 00:09:00,018 --> 00:09:02,008 [woman] Charlotte? 209 00:09:02,015 --> 00:09:03,995 Hi, Tricia! 210 00:09:04,002 --> 00:09:06,012 [Carrie] Tricia Watson was one of those hip moms 211 00:09:06,013 --> 00:09:10,013 for whom Barneys would always be stores, not dinosaurs. 212 00:09:10,015 --> 00:09:12,015 Cliff told me you and Trey are back together. 213 00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:14,020 -I'm so glad. -Aw. 214 00:09:14,020 --> 00:09:15,020 This is Mary Elizabeth. 215 00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:18,010 Hello, Mary Elizabeth. I'm Charlotte. 216 00:09:18,012 --> 00:09:20,022 Pleased to meet you. 217 00:09:20,018 --> 00:09:22,018 [low voice] Trey and I are trying to get pregnant. 218 00:09:22,018 --> 00:09:24,008 Aw, that's great! 219 00:09:24,010 --> 00:09:27,000 You and Cliff should come over for dinner this week. 220 00:09:27,004 --> 00:09:28,024 We just redecorated our dining room. 221 00:09:28,022 --> 00:09:30,002 We haven't even used it yet. 222 00:09:30,005 --> 00:09:34,015 I'd love to, but try finding a sitter for three kids under eight. 223 00:09:34,018 --> 00:09:37,018 I can't believe I'm 34 with three kids! 224 00:09:40,022 --> 00:09:42,022 I invited the Watsons over for dinner Tuesday. 225 00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:44,020 They're bringing their kids. 226 00:09:44,022 --> 00:09:46,002 All righty. 227 00:09:46,002 --> 00:09:48,022 [Carrie] Charlotte, 35 with no kids, 228 00:09:48,021 --> 00:09:52,021 decided it was time to get serious. 229 00:09:52,018 --> 00:09:56,008 The next day, I worked on a little piece I was calling, 230 00:09:56,008 --> 00:10:00,008 "36 hours and still no response from Aidan." 231 00:10:00,011 --> 00:10:03,011 The Indians had to wait up to six months for a response. 232 00:10:03,015 --> 00:10:05,015 It took me six months to get the message that 233 00:10:05,021 --> 00:10:07,011 I wanted to be with Aidan. 234 00:10:07,011 --> 00:10:10,011 And now, I couldn't wait another minute. 235 00:10:10,008 --> 00:10:12,018 Are all these improvements in communication 236 00:10:12,021 --> 00:10:15,001 really helping us communicate? 237 00:10:15,004 --> 00:10:16,014 In matters of love, 238 00:10:16,011 --> 00:10:20,011 do actions really speak louder than words? 239 00:10:20,009 --> 00:10:21,999 I decided to take action. 240 00:10:22,005 --> 00:10:23,015 And this time... 241 00:10:23,021 --> 00:10:25,001 he answered. 242 00:10:25,002 --> 00:10:26,002 [Aidan] Hello? 243 00:10:26,004 --> 00:10:28,004 Why won't you respond to my e-mail? 244 00:10:28,006 --> 00:10:29,006 Who is this? 245 00:10:29,007 --> 00:10:32,017 Oh, Carrie. It's Carrie. Hi. 246 00:10:32,020 --> 00:10:33,020 Hey! 247 00:10:33,019 --> 00:10:34,019 I was just asking 248 00:10:34,020 --> 00:10:36,020 if you ever got my e-mail. 249 00:10:36,021 --> 00:10:37,021 -ShoeGal? -What? 250 00:10:38,001 --> 00:10:40,001 That's my screen name, "ShoeGal." 251 00:10:40,006 --> 00:10:42,006 Oh, yeah, yeah, I think I got it and deleted it. 252 00:10:42,011 --> 00:10:44,001 That's not very neighborly. 253 00:10:44,002 --> 00:10:46,012 Well, I get so much damn junk mail, if, ah... 254 00:10:46,008 --> 00:10:47,018 I don't know an address, you know. 255 00:10:47,018 --> 00:10:48,998 Oh, I have the opposite problem. 256 00:10:49,006 --> 00:10:51,006 I've received two e-mails total. 257 00:10:51,014 --> 00:10:54,014 One from Miranda, and one welcoming me to AOL. 258 00:10:54,015 --> 00:10:55,005 What'd it say? 259 00:10:55,014 --> 00:10:56,024 [Carrie] Oh, just, you know, 260 00:10:56,017 --> 00:10:58,017 how to use the different features and stuff 261 00:10:58,021 --> 00:11:01,001 and you know, like "welcome"... 262 00:11:01,005 --> 00:11:02,015 No, no, no, the one you-- 263 00:11:03,000 --> 00:11:04,020 Oh! Oh, the one I-- 264 00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:06,010 the one to you, oh. 265 00:11:06,016 --> 00:11:08,006 Um, you know, 266 00:11:08,015 --> 00:11:09,015 it doesn't even matter. 267 00:11:09,019 --> 00:11:11,009 Oh, well, you know what I was thinking? 268 00:11:11,007 --> 00:11:13,017 I was thinking that, um, you, and Steve and Miranda and me 269 00:11:13,021 --> 00:11:14,021 could go out sometime. 270 00:11:14,019 --> 00:11:16,009 You know, just like as a... 271 00:11:17,012 --> 00:11:19,012 you know, a fun group thing. 272 00:11:19,016 --> 00:11:21,006 Yeah, yeah, yeah, that sounds good. 273 00:11:21,011 --> 00:11:23,001 Okay, great, so I'll set-- I'll set it up? 274 00:11:23,006 --> 00:11:25,996 -Okay. -Okay, so, okay. 275 00:11:26,020 --> 00:11:28,020 -Bye. -Bye. 276 00:11:34,003 --> 00:11:37,023 Meanwhile, Miranda's run led to "want to come up for coffee?" 277 00:11:37,023 --> 00:11:42,013 Which led to sex, which led her to believe that marathon man could be more 278 00:11:42,008 --> 00:11:43,998 than a running buddy. 279 00:11:45,020 --> 00:11:47,010 I'm all sweaty. 280 00:11:47,012 --> 00:11:48,022 You taste great. 281 00:12:12,004 --> 00:12:13,014 Hey, Miranda, did you get my e-mail 282 00:12:13,015 --> 00:12:15,005 about our double whatever it is? 283 00:12:15,007 --> 00:12:16,007 Yes, and I'm ignoring it. 284 00:12:17,016 --> 00:12:19,006 So far, not impressed with the e-mail. 285 00:12:19,016 --> 00:12:20,016 Why would I go out with Steve? 286 00:12:21,001 --> 00:12:22,021 No, no, you're not "going out with Steve." 287 00:12:22,023 --> 00:12:26,003 You're going as my airbag in case there's an impact. 288 00:12:26,004 --> 00:12:28,024 And Steve's going as Aidan's airbag. 289 00:12:29,000 --> 00:12:30,010 Well, would you explain that to Steve, 290 00:12:30,013 --> 00:12:32,013 because I don't want him to get the wrong impression. 291 00:12:32,014 --> 00:12:34,004 I'm dating other people now. 292 00:12:34,002 --> 00:12:35,012 Who? Marathon man? 293 00:12:35,012 --> 00:12:38,002 Yes, we slept together after our run. 294 00:12:38,002 --> 00:12:40,002 Well, I guess he was interested. 295 00:12:40,005 --> 00:12:41,015 Did he live up to his nickname? 296 00:12:41,022 --> 00:12:44,012 Yeah, it was good, except he kind of... 297 00:12:46,002 --> 00:12:47,012 licked my butt. 298 00:12:48,019 --> 00:12:50,999 Be specific. You mean the cheeks or-- 299 00:12:51,006 --> 00:12:52,016 It was more localized than that. 300 00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:53,020 Ah. 301 00:12:53,023 --> 00:12:56,023 Wait a minute, are we, are we talking... 302 00:12:57,001 --> 00:12:58,011 tuchus lingus? 303 00:12:58,013 --> 00:12:59,023 I'm afraid so. 304 00:13:00,001 --> 00:13:02,021 And I thought it was weird. It's weird, right? 305 00:13:02,023 --> 00:13:04,013 I mean, are we doing this now? 306 00:13:04,008 --> 00:13:05,008 Well, if the guy's willing... 307 00:13:05,012 --> 00:13:06,012 why not? 308 00:13:06,013 --> 00:13:08,003 Anyone other than Samantha? 309 00:13:08,002 --> 00:13:12,012 No, no, no, I never had a guy do the "TL" on me, no. 310 00:13:12,009 --> 00:13:14,009 Well, actually, no, one time it almost happened, 311 00:13:14,007 --> 00:13:16,007 but I got the feeling he just lost his way. 312 00:13:18,002 --> 00:13:19,012 Well, Trey likes to do it. 313 00:13:21,021 --> 00:13:23,011 We're married! 314 00:13:23,008 --> 00:13:25,018 Okay, I'm definitely in the slow sexual group 315 00:13:25,022 --> 00:13:27,012 if even Charlotte is open to this. 316 00:13:27,016 --> 00:13:30,006 There's something happening with men and the ass. 317 00:13:30,015 --> 00:13:32,015 It's true. The last few guys I've been with 318 00:13:32,021 --> 00:13:35,001 have been much more eager to attend to it. 319 00:13:35,003 --> 00:13:36,013 You know, digitally. 320 00:13:36,016 --> 00:13:37,006 How did this happen? 321 00:13:37,014 --> 00:13:38,014 How did they get the message 322 00:13:38,012 --> 00:13:40,022 that the ass is now on the menu? 323 00:13:40,019 --> 00:13:42,009 I bet there's one loud-mouthed guy 324 00:13:42,014 --> 00:13:45,004 who found some woman who loved it and told everybody, 325 00:13:45,002 --> 00:13:46,022 "Women love this!" 326 00:13:46,018 --> 00:13:47,018 Who is this guy? 327 00:13:47,022 --> 00:13:49,002 Who's the woman who loved it? 328 00:13:49,004 --> 00:13:51,024 -Don't knock it till you try it. -Bingo. 329 00:13:51,019 --> 00:13:53,009 Maybe I shouldn't have pulled away so fast. 330 00:13:53,015 --> 00:13:54,995 Was this my last shot, you think? 331 00:13:55,004 --> 00:13:56,024 Am I out of the ass loop forever? 332 00:13:56,021 --> 00:13:59,011 I mean, I can't bring myself to ask for it. 333 00:13:59,011 --> 00:14:00,011 You don't have to ask for it, 334 00:14:00,015 --> 00:14:01,015 just lean into it. 335 00:14:01,021 --> 00:14:04,011 No words necessary. He'll get the signal. 336 00:14:04,016 --> 00:14:07,006 But then, do I have to reciprocate? 337 00:14:07,016 --> 00:14:10,006 No, I would never do it back to them. 338 00:14:10,016 --> 00:14:11,006 Neither would I. 339 00:14:11,016 --> 00:14:12,016 Me neither. 340 00:14:12,017 --> 00:14:13,017 You wouldn't? 341 00:14:15,013 --> 00:14:19,023 [Carrie] That night, Charlotte performed a more traditional wifely duty. 342 00:14:20,000 --> 00:14:22,020 She cooked dinner for her husband and their guests. 343 00:14:23,001 --> 00:14:24,011 Go ahead, everyone. 344 00:14:26,011 --> 00:14:28,021 This looks amazing, Charlotte. 345 00:14:28,022 --> 00:14:30,012 Trish is amazed that anyone cooks. 346 00:14:30,013 --> 00:14:33,003 Well, Trish has three kids, which keeps her kind of busy. 347 00:14:33,006 --> 00:14:35,996 I don't want to sit next to the lady! 348 00:14:36,004 --> 00:14:37,014 Martin, that's one. 349 00:14:37,010 --> 00:14:38,010 Hmm! 350 00:14:38,016 --> 00:14:39,016 How many does he get? 351 00:14:39,017 --> 00:14:40,017 Forty-five. 352 00:14:40,017 --> 00:14:42,017 But I don't want to! 353 00:14:42,019 --> 00:14:44,009 -[crying] -[Trish] Martin! 354 00:14:44,012 --> 00:14:46,022 Um, we can rearrange if you want. 355 00:14:46,017 --> 00:14:47,017 No, it's fine. 356 00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:49,010 Ow! 357 00:14:49,009 --> 00:14:51,009 Martin, do you need your inhaler? 358 00:14:51,013 --> 00:14:52,023 -[Martin] No! -He's asthmatic. 359 00:14:52,017 --> 00:14:54,017 Not going to be much in the sports department. 360 00:14:54,019 --> 00:14:56,019 Not all little boys have to play sports. 361 00:14:56,022 --> 00:14:59,002 Don't talk to me like you talk to the kids. 362 00:14:59,020 --> 00:15:01,010 Martin, up here! 363 00:15:01,014 --> 00:15:03,014 [crying continues] 364 00:15:05,012 --> 00:15:06,022 Fancy shoes there, Hank. 365 00:15:06,023 --> 00:15:08,013 They used to be mine. 366 00:15:08,007 --> 00:15:09,017 Now he won't go anywhere without them. 367 00:15:10,001 --> 00:15:11,021 [Trisha] Don't talk about him like that. 368 00:15:11,020 --> 00:15:14,010 -Don't you talk to me like that. -[Martin crying] 369 00:15:14,008 --> 00:15:17,008 [Carrie] That night, Trey and Charlotte didn't have sex, 370 00:15:17,014 --> 00:15:20,014 and they didn't have sex the next night either. 371 00:15:20,009 --> 00:15:23,999 This time, inaction was speaking louder than words. 372 00:15:24,006 --> 00:15:25,996 So this guy from pest control comes over 373 00:15:26,006 --> 00:15:28,006 and he sticks a few dead ones on a tape strip... 374 00:15:28,009 --> 00:15:30,009 I, on the other hand, was full of words. 375 00:15:30,011 --> 00:15:31,011 ...they're everywhere. 376 00:15:31,009 --> 00:15:32,009 And so I say to him, I say, 377 00:15:32,012 --> 00:15:34,012 "Well, you know, sir, what are they?" 378 00:15:34,007 --> 00:15:35,997 And he says, "Lady, I don't know. 379 00:15:36,003 --> 00:15:37,023 That's why I'm sending them into the lab." 380 00:15:37,021 --> 00:15:39,011 And I'm thinking, "No, this is New York, 381 00:15:39,015 --> 00:15:40,015 and he's the pest guy, 382 00:15:41,001 --> 00:15:43,021 and I've got something he doesn't know what it is. 383 00:15:43,017 --> 00:15:44,997 And that ain't good!" 384 00:15:45,002 --> 00:15:47,002 [all laugh] 385 00:15:51,020 --> 00:15:54,000 I gotta take a leak. I'm laughing too hard. 386 00:15:54,003 --> 00:15:55,023 Aw, man, I was gonna go. 387 00:15:55,022 --> 00:15:56,022 And? 388 00:15:56,018 --> 00:15:57,018 [Aidan] And we're men. 389 00:15:58,000 --> 00:15:58,020 We don't do that. 390 00:15:59,001 --> 00:16:00,011 Women can do that, men can't. 391 00:16:00,013 --> 00:16:03,003 You should go. Break with convention. 392 00:16:03,002 --> 00:16:04,022 What the hell? I'm man enough. 393 00:16:04,023 --> 00:16:06,013 Yeah, do I get a say in this? 394 00:16:06,011 --> 00:16:08,011 I mean, we're already partners in a bar. 395 00:16:08,013 --> 00:16:09,013 People are gonna talk! 396 00:16:09,016 --> 00:16:11,006 [Aidan] We're going to the bathroom. 397 00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:15,020 So apparently, Aidan needed an airbag in the bathroom. 398 00:16:15,017 --> 00:16:16,997 You know what? I think I'm okay. 399 00:16:17,006 --> 00:16:18,006 You mean, you think you're over him? 400 00:16:18,015 --> 00:16:20,995 No, I mean, I think you can go. 401 00:16:21,003 --> 00:16:22,003 I, I don't even get flan? 402 00:16:22,006 --> 00:16:24,006 The thing is, if you don't leave now, 403 00:16:24,014 --> 00:16:26,024 then we're gonna have to end the night together and you know, 404 00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:29,010 we're gonna have to hug, and share cabs according to neighborhood. 405 00:16:29,010 --> 00:16:32,010 And then, and then I won't have any time alone with him. 406 00:16:32,014 --> 00:16:33,024 Yeah... 407 00:16:33,018 --> 00:16:34,018 Yeah, okay. 408 00:16:34,023 --> 00:16:35,023 Okay. 409 00:16:35,022 --> 00:16:37,012 And can you take Steve with you? 410 00:16:41,014 --> 00:16:43,014 [dog barks] 411 00:16:45,012 --> 00:16:46,022 Thank you for walking me home. 412 00:16:47,001 --> 00:16:50,011 Oh, hey, you live four blocks from the restaurant. 413 00:16:50,012 --> 00:16:52,002 It's the least I could do. 414 00:16:54,016 --> 00:16:56,006 Good to see you tonight. 415 00:16:56,016 --> 00:16:58,006 I think I want to get back together. 416 00:16:58,012 --> 00:17:01,012 Aw, fuck, I... 417 00:17:01,009 --> 00:17:03,019 was afraid you were going to say something like that. 418 00:17:06,019 --> 00:17:08,009 I was willing to try the friendship thing, 419 00:17:08,015 --> 00:17:11,015 but I can't do the relationship thing. 420 00:17:13,008 --> 00:17:14,008 But... 421 00:17:15,006 --> 00:17:16,006 You... 422 00:17:17,014 --> 00:17:20,024 you put your hand on my hand. 423 00:17:21,020 --> 00:17:23,000 What? 424 00:17:23,002 --> 00:17:25,022 At the restaurant, you moved to... 425 00:17:25,019 --> 00:17:28,019 Oh, I was trying to make you comfortable. 426 00:17:28,017 --> 00:17:31,017 You just seemed so nervous telling that bug story. 427 00:17:32,022 --> 00:17:33,022 Oh. 428 00:17:35,013 --> 00:17:38,023 Oh. Oh, well... 429 00:17:38,021 --> 00:17:40,001 Like... 430 00:17:40,005 --> 00:17:41,015 Then, I guess I should... 431 00:17:47,012 --> 00:17:59,022 Goodnight. 432 00:18:01,014 --> 00:18:02,024 [Carrie] Miranda didn't answer her phone, 433 00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:04,010 so I left her a desperate message 434 00:18:04,015 --> 00:18:06,995 and started to send her a desperate e-mail. 435 00:18:09,013 --> 00:18:12,013 -[telephone rings] -Hello? 436 00:18:12,008 --> 00:18:13,998 Hey, I was just about to call you. 437 00:18:14,006 --> 00:18:16,006 I was IM-ing with marathon man. 438 00:18:16,008 --> 00:18:18,018 Interesting. Will your tuchus be wanting some lingus? 439 00:18:18,023 --> 00:18:22,013 Uh, listen, if things work out between him and me, 440 00:18:22,009 --> 00:18:23,019 we never had that conversation. 441 00:18:24,001 --> 00:18:25,011 He's coming over. 442 00:18:25,009 --> 00:18:28,019 Well, I guess you'll be having dessert after all, hmm? 443 00:18:28,021 --> 00:18:30,001 What happened to my airbag? 444 00:18:30,006 --> 00:18:32,006 Outside the restaurant, Steve tried to kiss me. 445 00:18:32,016 --> 00:18:35,006 Aidan kissed me. Although, we kind of mis-kissed. 446 00:18:35,008 --> 00:18:36,008 And I wasn't going to kiss him at all 447 00:18:36,015 --> 00:18:38,005 because he said he just wanted to be friends, 448 00:18:38,009 --> 00:18:39,019 but then, he kissed me. 449 00:18:39,017 --> 00:18:41,017 -What does that mean? -[computer chimes] 450 00:18:41,018 --> 00:18:43,018 Oh, my God, he's online! 451 00:18:43,023 --> 00:18:44,023 Can he see me? 452 00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:47,000 No, just step away from the computer. 453 00:18:47,005 --> 00:18:48,005 No, I'm gonna go back there. 454 00:18:48,012 --> 00:18:49,012 Where, to Aidan's? 455 00:18:49,015 --> 00:18:50,015 Well, I know he's home. 456 00:18:50,018 --> 00:18:51,018 Carrie, pace yourself. 457 00:18:51,022 --> 00:18:53,012 Send him an e-mail or something. 458 00:18:53,009 --> 00:18:54,019 No, because then he'll just... 459 00:18:54,022 --> 00:18:56,002 say that he doesn't want to see me, 460 00:18:56,006 --> 00:18:57,996 but I know he does. 461 00:18:58,004 --> 00:19:00,004 His words said "no," but his kiss said "yes." 462 00:19:00,005 --> 00:19:03,005 That's the defense invoked by date rapists. 463 00:19:03,013 --> 00:19:04,023 I know he still feels it! 464 00:19:06,019 --> 00:19:08,019 When men attempt bold gestures, 465 00:19:09,001 --> 00:19:11,021 it's generally considered romantic. 466 00:19:18,000 --> 00:19:19,000 When women do it, 467 00:19:19,006 --> 00:19:22,016 it's often considered desperate or psycho. 468 00:19:22,018 --> 00:19:25,008 I was hoping to prove I was neither. 469 00:19:29,022 --> 00:19:31,022 Hey again, you. 470 00:19:34,005 --> 00:19:36,005 You haven't been out here since I went up, have you? 471 00:19:36,008 --> 00:19:39,018 No, no, no, no. I went home. 472 00:19:39,022 --> 00:19:41,012 And you came back? 473 00:19:42,004 --> 00:19:43,024 Yeah, I came back. 474 00:19:44,017 --> 00:19:46,007 See, I, I... 475 00:19:47,019 --> 00:19:49,009 I think... 476 00:19:50,007 --> 00:19:51,017 No, I feel fairly certain 477 00:19:51,017 --> 00:19:54,017 that there is still something between us. 478 00:19:56,007 --> 00:19:57,017 I had a nice time tonight... 479 00:19:58,015 --> 00:19:59,015 with you, I did, 480 00:19:59,020 --> 00:20:02,010 but I just wanna, I wanna leave it at that. 481 00:20:02,010 --> 00:20:04,010 Well... 482 00:20:04,012 --> 00:20:07,002 can I come up and talk to you for a few minutes? 483 00:20:07,005 --> 00:20:08,995 I don't think that's a good idea. 484 00:20:11,008 --> 00:20:12,998 Because of what might happen? 485 00:20:16,003 --> 00:20:18,023 Because it's not a good time. 486 00:20:20,022 --> 00:20:22,012 Look, I know that you're probably scared, 487 00:20:22,014 --> 00:20:26,004 and I would be too, but it's different now. 488 00:20:26,004 --> 00:20:29,014 Things are different. I'm, I'm different. 489 00:20:29,007 --> 00:20:32,007 In fact, in fact, gimme a second. 490 00:20:32,012 --> 00:20:35,012 In fact, cigarettes, gone! 491 00:20:35,008 --> 00:20:37,008 Seriously. All bad habits gone. 492 00:20:37,014 --> 00:20:40,014 This is a-- a whole new thing because I... 493 00:20:40,010 --> 00:20:43,010 I miss you. And I've missed you. 494 00:20:43,012 --> 00:20:46,012 And it's not just because you look so good. 495 00:20:46,008 --> 00:20:47,018 And you do, and you should know that. 496 00:20:47,020 --> 00:20:50,010 But I lie in bed at night and I think about us, 497 00:20:50,013 --> 00:20:53,013 and I think about you holding me and-- 498 00:20:53,007 --> 00:20:55,997 You broke my heart! 499 00:21:02,005 --> 00:21:02,995 Carrie! 500 00:21:07,002 --> 00:21:08,022 Samantha! 501 00:21:08,023 --> 00:21:10,013 I wuv your titty-witties! 502 00:21:10,011 --> 00:21:13,001 [Carrie] As I was wishing I had said nothing, 503 00:21:13,006 --> 00:21:15,006 Samantha decided she had to say something. 504 00:21:15,016 --> 00:21:19,016 Warren, you're a great fuck, 505 00:21:19,021 --> 00:21:22,021 but I don't need the baby talk. 506 00:21:22,021 --> 00:21:25,001 You don't have to call these my titty-witties. 507 00:21:25,005 --> 00:21:26,005 These are my breasts. 508 00:21:26,011 --> 00:21:29,011 And you don't have to say anything about them. 509 00:21:29,016 --> 00:21:32,996 It's just sex, and it's fine. 510 00:21:38,004 --> 00:21:39,004 Warren? 511 00:21:40,003 --> 00:21:41,013 [door slams] 512 00:21:44,001 --> 00:21:45,001 Warren... 513 00:21:47,000 --> 00:21:48,020 Would you please come out of there? 514 00:21:48,017 --> 00:21:50,017 Can we talk about this like adults? 515 00:21:52,008 --> 00:21:53,018 We're not finished. 516 00:21:55,022 --> 00:21:58,012 I was very closey-wosey. 517 00:22:00,021 --> 00:22:04,021 [sighs] Okay, you can call them titty-witties. 518 00:22:05,001 --> 00:22:08,001 I'm leaving. I got an early day tomorrow. 519 00:22:08,005 --> 00:22:09,015 Oh, come on, don't pout. 520 00:22:10,001 --> 00:22:12,011 We were having such a nice time. 521 00:22:12,013 --> 00:22:14,013 It was only a suggestion. 522 00:22:14,016 --> 00:22:16,016 Where are my shoes? Ha! 523 00:22:20,002 --> 00:22:22,022 [Carrie] Samantha realized she wore the nipples 524 00:22:22,019 --> 00:22:24,009 and attracted a big baby. 525 00:22:24,016 --> 00:22:26,006 [door slams] 526 00:22:26,007 --> 00:22:27,017 And speaking of babies, 527 00:22:27,023 --> 00:22:30,013 Charlotte and Trey still were not. 528 00:22:31,020 --> 00:22:33,020 This was delivered today. 529 00:22:35,007 --> 00:22:36,017 I ordered it a week ago. 530 00:22:38,003 --> 00:22:40,023 They needed time to engrave it. I totally forgot. 531 00:22:40,020 --> 00:22:44,020 "We had each other, and then we had you, 532 00:22:44,021 --> 00:22:47,001 and then we had everything. 533 00:22:47,004 --> 00:22:48,024 Love, Mommy and Daddy." 534 00:22:48,023 --> 00:22:51,013 Ah, it's completely premature. 535 00:22:51,007 --> 00:22:53,007 I was just so excited. 536 00:22:53,007 --> 00:22:55,007 [Charlotte] And now? 537 00:22:55,007 --> 00:22:57,017 Do you not want a baby anymore? 538 00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:01,000 Of course I do... 539 00:23:02,009 --> 00:23:03,009 Don't you? 540 00:23:03,010 --> 00:23:04,020 Well, we pretty much stopped trying 541 00:23:04,023 --> 00:23:06,023 after the Watsons came over. 542 00:23:07,009 --> 00:23:08,009 Yeah. 543 00:23:10,020 --> 00:23:13,000 Kids don't even want to sit by me. 544 00:23:16,002 --> 00:23:18,012 I want to sit next to you. 545 00:23:21,021 --> 00:23:23,001 [sighs] 546 00:23:26,004 --> 00:23:27,014 You know, I knew Cliff and Tricia 547 00:23:27,015 --> 00:23:28,015 when they were first married. 548 00:23:28,021 --> 00:23:30,011 And they were so in love. 549 00:23:31,020 --> 00:23:33,020 And now, they're just... 550 00:23:35,008 --> 00:23:37,008 Parents. [chuckles] 551 00:23:37,022 --> 00:23:38,022 Yeah. 552 00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:47,010 Maybe if we only have one child... 553 00:23:48,020 --> 00:23:50,010 One to start. 554 00:23:52,004 --> 00:23:53,014 See how we do. 555 00:23:54,014 --> 00:23:55,024 Besides... 556 00:23:55,018 --> 00:23:56,998 [Carrie] Then Trey told the lie 557 00:23:57,005 --> 00:23:58,005 that all parents-to-be 558 00:23:58,011 --> 00:23:59,011 have to tell themselves 559 00:23:59,015 --> 00:24:00,015 in order to procreate. 560 00:24:01,001 --> 00:24:03,021 Our kids will be different. 561 00:24:03,019 --> 00:24:06,999 [Carrie] Even though the whole experience had them a little rattled, 562 00:24:07,003 --> 00:24:09,023 that night, Trey and Charlotte made love... 563 00:24:10,000 --> 00:24:11,020 and possibly a baby. 564 00:24:11,021 --> 00:24:14,011 And downtown, Miranda seemingly 565 00:24:14,009 --> 00:24:16,019 had her communication problem licked. 566 00:24:19,022 --> 00:24:23,002 And she felt like she should do something in return. 567 00:24:25,013 --> 00:24:27,013 Would you like a massage? 568 00:24:28,002 --> 00:24:29,012 I would love one. 569 00:24:56,003 --> 00:24:58,023 I don't want to do that! 570 00:24:58,020 --> 00:25:00,010 Well, why didn't you just say you weren't interested 571 00:25:00,015 --> 00:25:02,015 before you were talking into my ass? 572 00:25:16,012 --> 00:25:21,012 [tap at window] 573 00:25:33,019 --> 00:25:35,999 [Carrie] This time, we didn't need any words. 574 00:25:43,007 --> 00:25:47,007 [romantic music] 575 00:26:24,020 --> 00:26:27,010 Do you want to do this to make up for the past? 576 00:26:29,012 --> 00:26:31,002 To relieve your conscience? 577 00:26:31,022 --> 00:26:33,002 'Cause we're okay. 578 00:26:34,023 --> 00:26:37,023 I've mentally kicked your butt all over Manhattan. 579 00:26:41,008 --> 00:26:42,018 I'm fine now. 580 00:26:43,009 --> 00:26:44,009 No. 581 00:26:46,002 --> 00:26:47,012 No, I just... 582 00:26:50,021 --> 00:26:52,011 I love you. 583 00:26:55,002 --> 00:26:57,002 I still love you. I just... 584 00:26:59,013 --> 00:27:02,013 I wish that I could be your girlfriend again. 585 00:27:11,011 --> 00:27:13,001 I need to think about that. 586 00:27:20,023 --> 00:27:23,023 [Carrie] His actions said he still loved me. 587 00:27:23,018 --> 00:27:25,008 Or maybe he just missed me. 588 00:27:25,014 --> 00:27:28,004 Or maybe he needed closure. 589 00:27:28,003 --> 00:27:29,013 Maybe I'd never know. 590 00:27:29,015 --> 00:27:30,015 [door closes] 591 00:27:33,016 --> 00:27:36,006 The next morning, due to sheer embarrassment, 592 00:27:36,014 --> 00:27:38,024 Miranda got what she needed, 593 00:27:39,012 --> 00:27:40,022 a running buddy 594 00:27:40,019 --> 00:27:43,019 who pushed her into the nine-minute mile group. 595 00:27:47,011 --> 00:27:50,011 And I still had no response from Aidan. 596 00:27:59,012 --> 00:28:01,012 [Aidan] Hey, Carrie! You up there? 597 00:28:06,015 --> 00:28:08,005 Okay, let's give it a shot. 598 00:28:08,012 --> 00:28:09,022 Really? 599 00:28:11,003 --> 00:28:12,013 Do you want to come upstairs? 600 00:28:12,015 --> 00:28:14,995 Nah, I promised Pete I'd take him for a walk. 601 00:28:15,005 --> 00:28:16,005 Oh. 602 00:28:16,010 --> 00:28:18,000 You want to go for a walk? 603 00:28:18,003 --> 00:28:19,013 Yeah. 604 00:28:20,019 --> 00:28:22,019 Yeah, let's go for a walk. 605 00:28:22,017 --> 00:28:23,007 Okay. 606 00:28:23,014 --> 00:28:25,024 Don't move, 'kay? 607 00:28:30,002 --> 00:28:31,012 I'll be right there! 608 00:28:36,018 --> 00:28:37,018 [computer beeps]