1
00:00:47,009 --> 00:00:48,019
One frazzled Friday,
2
00:00:49,001 --> 00:00:50,021
four overbooked
girlfriends
3
00:00:50,021 --> 00:00:52,021
came from four
different directions.
4
00:00:52,020 --> 00:00:54,010
The East Side,
5
00:00:54,008 --> 00:00:56,008
the West Side,
6
00:00:56,011 --> 00:00:58,011
Park Avenue,
7
00:00:58,014 --> 00:01:01,004
and Samantha.
8
00:01:02,009 --> 00:01:04,009
It was the ultimate
New York power lunch,
9
00:01:04,012 --> 00:01:06,022
also known as
the power catch-up.
10
00:01:06,019 --> 00:01:07,019
I'll start.
11
00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:10,000
I can sum up my life
in one breath.
12
00:01:10,002 --> 00:01:12,022
Work, work,
Au Bon Pain, work.
13
00:01:12,020 --> 00:01:13,020
And you?
14
00:01:13,019 --> 00:01:15,019
Uh, okay, let's see. I...
15
00:01:15,020 --> 00:01:17,000
Aidan, Aidan...
16
00:01:17,004 --> 00:01:18,024
This pimple,
Aidan.
17
00:01:18,019 --> 00:01:19,999
Gee, maybe we don't
need an hour.
18
00:01:20,004 --> 00:01:22,014
Charlotte, I cannot believe
you made this sandwich.
19
00:01:22,015 --> 00:01:25,005
I love you not working,
you can be my wife.
20
00:01:25,007 --> 00:01:26,017
You know, I thought I'd have
more free time,
21
00:01:26,021 --> 00:01:28,021
but redecorating
is very stressful.
22
00:01:28,018 --> 00:01:31,008
Did you know there are over
40 different kinds of dimmers?
23
00:01:31,010 --> 00:01:35,010
Remember back when the economy
was good and we had a table?
24
00:01:35,010 --> 00:01:38,010
-Um, Carrie?
-Yeah?
25
00:01:38,015 --> 00:01:39,995
Are you
a janitor now?
26
00:01:40,002 --> 00:01:42,012
I know, it's ridiculous.
27
00:01:42,014 --> 00:01:45,024
I need these seven just to
get in Aidan's building.
28
00:01:45,022 --> 00:01:46,022
Aidan gave you
his keys?
29
00:01:47,001 --> 00:01:48,011
Yeah, but I always make him
come to my place.
30
00:01:48,015 --> 00:01:50,015
He buys that two-in-one shampoo.
31
00:01:50,021 --> 00:01:52,021
Wait a minute, does Aidan
have your keys now too?
32
00:01:53,001 --> 00:01:54,011
Yes, he does.
33
00:01:54,007 --> 00:01:54,997
All two of them.
34
00:01:55,003 --> 00:01:57,003
You exchanged keys,
that's big.
35
00:01:57,005 --> 00:01:59,015
Oh, no, no, that's
the opposite of "Big."
36
00:01:59,017 --> 00:02:00,017
Good for you.
37
00:02:00,020 --> 00:02:03,020
It took me six months to
give my cleaning lady a key.
38
00:02:03,021 --> 00:02:07,021
Well, I happen to have the key
to a lasting relationship...
39
00:02:07,018 --> 00:02:09,008
right here.
40
00:02:09,012 --> 00:02:13,002
1001 sexual positions, I got it
on the corner from a guy,
41
00:02:13,006 --> 00:02:14,006
$1.50.
42
00:02:14,016 --> 00:02:15,006
I love this city.
43
00:02:15,015 --> 00:02:16,015
Whoa, Nellie.
44
00:02:16,019 --> 00:02:18,009
Whose legs bend
back that far?
45
00:02:18,012 --> 00:02:19,022
It's like sex
for the boneless.
46
00:02:19,018 --> 00:02:23,008
See, that's what I love about
this guy Nick I'm seeing.
47
00:02:23,011 --> 00:02:24,021
He's deboned?
48
00:02:24,018 --> 00:02:27,008
He's a wrestling
coach at NYU
49
00:02:27,008 --> 00:02:29,018
and he's like an extra-strength
rubber band.
50
00:02:29,018 --> 00:02:31,008
My congregants,
51
00:02:31,015 --> 00:02:32,015
please refer...
52
00:02:32,019 --> 00:02:35,019
to position 91 in
your prayer book.
53
00:02:35,021 --> 00:02:37,001
And let us say...
54
00:02:37,004 --> 00:02:38,024
-"Amen."
-Hmm!
55
00:02:42,010 --> 00:02:43,020
That night I came home
56
00:02:44,001 --> 00:02:47,001
to find Aidan in the most
shocking position of all.
57
00:02:47,003 --> 00:02:48,023
Cooking to the oldies.
58
00:02:48,019 --> 00:02:53,009
You're deflowering
my pristine kitchen.
59
00:02:53,008 --> 00:02:56,018
Ooh, fajitas!
60
00:02:56,017 --> 00:02:58,017
Oh, Carrie,
meet my new George Foreman,
61
00:02:58,022 --> 00:03:01,022
lean, mean, fat-reducing
grilling machine.
62
00:03:01,017 --> 00:03:03,017
George, Carrie.
63
00:03:03,022 --> 00:03:05,022
Charmed, I'm sure.
64
00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:11,020
Hmm... Whatcha doing
back there, lady bird?
65
00:03:11,019 --> 00:03:13,019
I'm just looking
for something.
66
00:03:13,021 --> 00:03:15,011
Not in front
of George.
67
00:03:16,022 --> 00:03:19,012
Leave George
out of it.
68
00:03:19,013 --> 00:03:21,013
Okay, that's it.
69
00:03:21,007 --> 00:03:23,017
-You're going down!
70
00:03:25,002 --> 00:03:27,012
Oh... Hey...
71
00:03:27,009 --> 00:03:28,999
What about
the fajitas?
72
00:03:29,004 --> 00:03:32,014
Fuck the fajitas.
73
00:03:32,010 --> 00:03:34,020
If giving a man the
keys to your apartment
74
00:03:34,017 --> 00:03:38,007
means unlocking the door to
home cooking and great sex...
75
00:03:38,013 --> 00:03:40,023
"Why were so many
independent--"
76
00:03:40,017 --> 00:03:43,007
No, no, don't, don't, don't,
it's not done yet.
77
00:03:43,007 --> 00:03:44,007
Don't read it.
78
00:03:44,013 --> 00:03:46,003
Aw.
79
00:03:50,014 --> 00:03:52,024
Oh, my God.
80
00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:55,010
Oh, my God!
81
00:03:55,011 --> 00:03:56,021
Come--
82
00:03:56,017 --> 00:03:58,017
C'mon, come back, wha--
83
00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:00,000
What?
84
00:04:00,005 --> 00:04:02,015
-What is this,
why is this happening?
-What's up?
85
00:04:02,021 --> 00:04:07,011
My computer just crashed
right in the middle, I just--
I--
86
00:04:07,008 --> 00:04:11,018
Okay, just relax, darling.
Breathe and reboot.
87
00:04:15,021 --> 00:04:16,021
Hey!
88
00:04:16,023 --> 00:04:18,023
It always works
on my computer.
89
00:04:18,018 --> 00:04:19,998
Well?
90
00:04:20,006 --> 00:04:20,996
Let's, uh...
91
00:04:21,005 --> 00:04:22,005
Get your manual out.
92
00:04:22,010 --> 00:04:23,020
I don't have
a manual!
93
00:04:23,022 --> 00:04:26,022
I got rid of it
in a feng shui attack.
94
00:04:26,023 --> 00:04:28,013
Oh, my God, I want
to kill myself.
95
00:04:28,011 --> 00:04:29,021
Just hang
in there, sugar.
96
00:04:29,023 --> 00:04:32,013
This thing's just faking
you out, that's all.
97
00:04:32,011 --> 00:04:35,021
Aidan, please.
Please just stop,
stop touching it.
98
00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:37,000
-Hold on!
-Stop, stop it!
99
00:04:37,004 --> 00:04:39,014
Because you don't know what
you're doing, just stop!
100
00:04:42,009 --> 00:04:43,999
Two meltdowns later
101
00:04:44,004 --> 00:04:47,004
we rushed my '98 laptop
in my '99 pashmina to Tekserve.
102
00:04:47,005 --> 00:04:49,005
Can you please not...
103
00:04:49,007 --> 00:04:50,017
do that?
104
00:04:51,001 --> 00:04:52,021
Whoo-hoo!
105
00:04:52,022 --> 00:04:54,012
64!
106
00:04:54,013 --> 00:04:57,003
Oh, God, c'mon!
107
00:04:57,006 --> 00:04:58,006
Number 64.
Yes.
108
00:04:58,016 --> 00:05:01,006
Hi, thank God. Please...
Here, please tell me...
109
00:05:01,014 --> 00:05:05,014
-I tried a few home remedies
on this thing, but you know...
-...that you can fix this.
110
00:05:05,009 --> 00:05:07,009
Whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa.
111
00:05:07,008 --> 00:05:08,998
One at a time.
Which one of you crashed?
112
00:05:09,006 --> 00:05:11,006
Me, me, I did,
it's mine.
113
00:05:11,013 --> 00:05:13,013
It's mine, but then
he did something to it.
114
00:05:13,011 --> 00:05:15,001
Tell him, tell him
what you did to it.
115
00:05:15,002 --> 00:05:16,022
I hit
control-alt-delete.
116
00:05:17,001 --> 00:05:20,021
That only works on PCs.
You a PC user?
117
00:05:20,018 --> 00:05:22,018
Yeah, you're not
compatible.
118
00:05:24,000 --> 00:05:25,020
Okay, tell me
exactly what happened
119
00:05:25,021 --> 00:05:27,001
right before
you crashed.
120
00:05:27,005 --> 00:05:28,005
Um, okay...
121
00:05:28,016 --> 00:05:30,006
I was--
You know I was just typing
122
00:05:30,010 --> 00:05:32,010
and then he came over and
he kissed me
123
00:05:32,008 --> 00:05:34,008
and then I...
124
00:05:34,012 --> 00:05:35,012
I got the bomb.
125
00:05:35,016 --> 00:05:37,006
Not "da bomb,"
you know?
126
00:05:37,012 --> 00:05:38,022
Not the good kind.
127
00:05:38,021 --> 00:05:41,001
Is this funny, do you think
that this is funny?
128
00:05:41,003 --> 00:05:43,013
Just trying to,
you know...
129
00:05:43,007 --> 00:05:45,017
You are mortifying me.
130
00:05:45,020 --> 00:05:48,010
When was the last time
you backed up your work?
131
00:05:49,003 --> 00:05:50,013
Um...
132
00:05:50,009 --> 00:05:51,999
I don't do that.
133
00:05:52,004 --> 00:05:54,014
You don't
back up?
134
00:05:55,004 --> 00:05:55,024
No.
135
00:05:55,023 --> 00:05:58,013
Anything else
before we go in?
136
00:05:58,008 --> 00:05:59,008
Yes!
137
00:05:59,011 --> 00:06:01,021
There was a mean little
man who popped up
138
00:06:01,023 --> 00:06:04,003
and he had "x's"
where his eyes should be.
139
00:06:04,006 --> 00:06:05,016
And his tongue...
140
00:06:05,019 --> 00:06:07,999
was hanging out
the side of his mouth.
141
00:06:08,003 --> 00:06:10,003
-He didn't have a tongue.
-He had a tongue.
142
00:06:10,003 --> 00:06:11,003
That's the sad mac.
143
00:06:11,006 --> 00:06:13,016
You sad macked, you should've
told me that before.
144
00:06:13,019 --> 00:06:14,019
Oh, my God, why?
145
00:06:15,001 --> 00:06:16,011
Why, what does
that mean?
146
00:06:16,012 --> 00:06:17,022
Could be
your motherboard,
147
00:06:17,023 --> 00:06:18,023
that's the guts of
your computer.
148
00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:20,020
It could be
bad ram.
149
00:06:20,017 --> 00:06:21,017
We'll keep it here
for a couple of days,
150
00:06:22,001 --> 00:06:23,011
run some tests.
151
00:06:23,009 --> 00:06:25,019
I'm Dimitiri.
152
00:06:25,017 --> 00:06:26,997
I'll call you if
we find anything.
153
00:06:27,005 --> 00:06:31,015
-If?
-78, number 78!
154
00:06:31,018 --> 00:06:33,998
Oh, God, Miranda,
I'm freaking out.
155
00:06:34,005 --> 00:06:36,005
What if everything I've
ever written is gone?
156
00:06:36,010 --> 00:06:38,010
When was the last time
you backed up?
157
00:06:38,009 --> 00:06:38,999
You know...
158
00:06:39,006 --> 00:06:41,016
no one talks about
backing up.
159
00:06:41,017 --> 00:06:43,997
You've never used that
expression with me before ever.
160
00:06:44,004 --> 00:06:45,004
But apparently,
161
00:06:45,006 --> 00:06:47,006
everybody's secretly
running home at night
162
00:06:47,012 --> 00:06:48,022
and backing up their work.
163
00:06:48,020 --> 00:06:52,000
Dr. Adleman,
please call extension 2-1-3.
164
00:06:52,003 --> 00:06:53,003
Where are you?
165
00:06:53,004 --> 00:06:56,014
I'm at the hospital
in Philadelphia.
166
00:06:56,010 --> 00:06:57,010
My mom had
a heart attack.
167
00:06:57,016 --> 00:06:59,006
Oh, my God.
168
00:06:59,008 --> 00:07:01,018
And you let me go on and on
about my stupid computer?
169
00:07:01,018 --> 00:07:04,008
Well, that's very upsetting,
I've been through that.
170
00:07:04,010 --> 00:07:05,020
Sweetie,
is she okay?
171
00:07:06,000 --> 00:07:07,020
How could you go to Philadelphia
without telling me?
172
00:07:07,021 --> 00:07:10,001
I had about six minutes
to make the train
173
00:07:10,002 --> 00:07:12,002
and I didn't know how bad
it was till I got here.
174
00:07:12,002 --> 00:07:13,012
Well, how bad is it?
175
00:07:13,009 --> 00:07:15,019
They keep telling us
different things.
176
00:07:15,019 --> 00:07:16,999
She's pretty
out of it.
177
00:07:17,002 --> 00:07:19,022
Although, she did open
her eyes just long enough
178
00:07:19,021 --> 00:07:21,001
to veto
my lipstick.
179
00:07:21,006 --> 00:07:24,006
Is there anything I can
do to help? I'll jump on
a train.
180
00:07:24,007 --> 00:07:25,017
I'll come down there
and keep you company.
181
00:07:26,001 --> 00:07:28,021
No, no, it's fine,
I'm fine.
182
00:07:28,018 --> 00:07:30,998
Miranda, the doctor
is waiting.
183
00:07:31,004 --> 00:07:34,004
You can't use a cellphone
in the hospital.
184
00:07:34,004 --> 00:07:36,014
She called me.
185
00:07:37,017 --> 00:07:38,017
Great.
186
00:07:38,019 --> 00:07:40,009
Now my sister's
mad at me, I gotta go.
187
00:07:40,012 --> 00:07:41,022
You'll keep me
posted, alright?
188
00:07:42,001 --> 00:07:44,001
Okay, bye.
189
00:07:44,004 --> 00:07:46,024
Meanwhile, Charlotte's
afternoon was filled with
190
00:07:46,021 --> 00:07:49,011
ovulating and decorating.
191
00:07:50,013 --> 00:07:52,023
She was 12 days
into her cycle
192
00:07:52,018 --> 00:07:56,008
and three rooms into
her lighting project.
193
00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:05,010
She had become a bona fide
dimmer expert.
194
00:08:07,014 --> 00:08:11,004
Samantha called in
a bona fide positions expert
195
00:08:11,002 --> 00:08:13,012
who came
fully equipped.
196
00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:31,016
Turns out a
half-nelson was
very much like position 411.
197
00:08:38,003 --> 00:08:40,003
One half-nelson...
198
00:08:40,004 --> 00:08:42,014
One full orgasm.
199
00:08:47,001 --> 00:08:48,011
Hello?
200
00:08:48,014 --> 00:08:50,024
Hey, it's me,
I'm sorry to wake you.
201
00:08:51,000 --> 00:08:52,020
Oh, that's okay.
202
00:08:54,010 --> 00:08:55,010
My mom died.
203
00:08:55,015 --> 00:08:56,015
Oh, my God.
204
00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:59,000
Yeah.
205
00:08:59,003 --> 00:09:00,023
She was stable
last night.
206
00:09:00,017 --> 00:09:02,007
And we all
went home.
207
00:09:02,008 --> 00:09:05,018
And then they called
and said she was crashing.
208
00:09:05,020 --> 00:09:09,010
And by the time
we got back,
she had died.
209
00:09:09,008 --> 00:09:12,008
Oh, Miranda,
I'm so sorry.
210
00:09:14,021 --> 00:09:18,001
I just wish we hadn't
gone home, you know?
211
00:09:18,002 --> 00:09:20,002
Nobody wanted to,
but they kept telling us
212
00:09:20,004 --> 00:09:21,014
we oughta
get some sleep.
213
00:09:21,015 --> 00:09:23,995
I'm sure that she knew
on some level that,
214
00:09:24,005 --> 00:09:25,005
that you
were with her.
215
00:09:25,016 --> 00:09:27,006
But I wasn't
with her!
216
00:09:27,011 --> 00:09:29,001
Nobody was!
217
00:09:30,008 --> 00:09:31,008
What can I do?
218
00:09:31,016 --> 00:09:34,016
Nothing,
I'm, I'm fine.
219
00:09:34,022 --> 00:09:38,012
I'll be fine.
220
00:09:38,014 --> 00:09:42,004
The funeral's on Tuesday and
I don't have anything to wear.
221
00:09:42,006 --> 00:09:44,016
Because I didn't think
I would be going to a funeral
222
00:09:44,018 --> 00:09:45,018
while I was here.
223
00:09:45,019 --> 00:09:47,019
Well, I'll be there,
so, I can...
224
00:09:47,018 --> 00:09:50,008
I'll just, I'll bring you
something from your apartment.
225
00:09:50,009 --> 00:09:51,999
No, no, don't bother.
226
00:09:52,006 --> 00:09:55,996
I'm just gonna go out
and buy a shitty black dress
227
00:09:56,006 --> 00:09:57,006
I'll never
wear again.
228
00:09:57,011 --> 00:09:59,021
Are you sure?
I'd be happy to do it.
229
00:09:59,023 --> 00:10:01,013
No, don't...
230
00:10:01,009 --> 00:10:03,009
Don't do anything.
231
00:10:05,002 --> 00:10:07,002
I better go.
232
00:10:07,004 --> 00:10:08,024
Miranda,
I'm so sorry.
233
00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:11,020
Yeah, thanks,
I gotta go.
234
00:10:16,023 --> 00:10:19,003
Miranda's
mother died.
235
00:10:19,002 --> 00:10:20,012
Oh...
236
00:10:26,017 --> 00:10:29,997
Oh...Come here,
you okay?
237
00:10:30,002 --> 00:10:31,022
I'm fine. I just...
238
00:10:32,019 --> 00:10:34,009
Do you know when
the funeral is?
239
00:10:34,009 --> 00:10:35,999
I'd like to go
if I can.
240
00:10:36,004 --> 00:10:37,024
Umm...
241
00:10:39,019 --> 00:10:41,999
I don't know.
242
00:10:44,009 --> 00:10:45,019
You don't have to.
243
00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:49,010
I don't really know.
244
00:10:54,005 --> 00:10:55,005
Hi.
245
00:10:55,015 --> 00:10:56,995
Where have you been
and where's Miranda?
246
00:10:57,006 --> 00:10:58,006
I'm starving.
247
00:11:00,010 --> 00:11:02,000
What's wrong?
248
00:11:04,018 --> 00:11:06,008
Miranda's in
Philadelphia.
249
00:11:06,009 --> 00:11:08,019
Her mother had
a heart attack yesterday
250
00:11:08,019 --> 00:11:10,019
and she died.
251
00:11:10,020 --> 00:11:12,010
Early this morning.
252
00:11:12,016 --> 00:11:14,996
She wasn't
even sick.
253
00:11:17,008 --> 00:11:18,018
I can't believe it.
254
00:11:18,023 --> 00:11:21,003
Poor Miranda,
how is she?
255
00:11:23,010 --> 00:11:25,010
I don't know.
256
00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:29,000
She's not good.
257
00:11:30,009 --> 00:11:32,999
I just felt so awful
for her and I just--
258
00:11:34,006 --> 00:11:35,006
You know, I didn't--
259
00:11:35,007 --> 00:11:37,007
I didn't know what to
say to her and...
260
00:11:39,007 --> 00:11:41,017
And you know Miranda, she was
trying to be so strong,
261
00:11:41,020 --> 00:11:43,010
but she just...
262
00:11:43,012 --> 00:11:45,002
She sounded
so alone.
263
00:11:45,003 --> 00:11:47,013
And I just kept saying
all the wrong things, I think.
264
00:11:47,010 --> 00:11:49,020
No, no, I'm sure
you didn't.
265
00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:52,000
Oh, here.
266
00:11:52,005 --> 00:11:52,995
Thanks, I'm sorry.
267
00:11:53,005 --> 00:11:54,015
Well...
268
00:11:55,001 --> 00:11:57,001
I guess the first thing we
should do is send some flowers.
269
00:11:57,005 --> 00:11:59,995
-Right.
-Or a fruit basket.
270
00:12:00,006 --> 00:12:02,016
Or muffins,
what do you think?
271
00:12:05,005 --> 00:12:06,015
Hey, you alright?
272
00:12:06,021 --> 00:12:08,001
What?
273
00:12:08,005 --> 00:12:09,015
I'm fine.
274
00:12:09,020 --> 00:12:13,000
Flowers are fine, just tell me
who to send the check to.
275
00:12:15,016 --> 00:12:18,006
I'm just hungry.
276
00:12:18,014 --> 00:12:20,004
After breakfast,
277
00:12:20,002 --> 00:12:21,022
Charlotte showed
her support for Miranda
278
00:12:21,020 --> 00:12:24,000
by becoming the Martha Stewart
of death.
279
00:12:24,003 --> 00:12:27,013
No, I want
the clear cellophane
and the navy ribbon.
280
00:12:27,016 --> 00:12:29,006
Samantha, have you
called Miranda yet?
281
00:12:29,016 --> 00:12:30,996
'Cause I just
spoke to her
282
00:12:31,003 --> 00:12:33,003
and she thinks that
it'd be faster for us
283
00:12:33,002 --> 00:12:35,012
to take the train
to Philadelphia and I agree.
284
00:12:35,010 --> 00:12:36,020
We're going to
the funeral?
285
00:12:36,022 --> 00:12:39,012
I thought we were
just sending flowers.
286
00:12:39,016 --> 00:12:41,006
Of course we're going
to the funeral
287
00:12:41,009 --> 00:12:42,999
and you should
call her.
288
00:12:43,005 --> 00:12:45,005
I think she would really
like to hear from you.
289
00:12:45,008 --> 00:12:46,998
Well, what am I gonna
say to her?
290
00:12:47,005 --> 00:12:50,005
You could say,
"I'm so sorry for your loss.
291
00:12:50,016 --> 00:12:52,016
I love you,
I'm here for you."
292
00:12:52,020 --> 00:12:53,020
That's enough ribbon.
293
00:12:53,022 --> 00:12:55,022
"You're in
my thoughts.
294
00:12:55,017 --> 00:12:58,007
May she rest in peace,
I'm so sorry you lost--"
295
00:12:58,010 --> 00:13:01,000
Fine, fine,
I'll call her, goodbye.
296
00:13:02,007 --> 00:13:02,997
In times of sorrow,
297
00:13:03,006 --> 00:13:06,006
some people have
trouble reaching out.
298
00:13:07,016 --> 00:13:10,016
Samantha wasn't
one of those people.
299
00:13:13,022 --> 00:13:16,012
Wanna wrestle?
300
00:13:17,015 --> 00:13:20,015
Mmm... Keep doing that.
301
00:13:20,017 --> 00:13:23,007
Keep doing that!
302
00:13:23,007 --> 00:13:24,017
But today...
303
00:13:24,023 --> 00:13:28,013
something was
just out of reach.
304
00:13:30,002 --> 00:13:32,002
So, they tried
another position.
305
00:13:32,003 --> 00:13:33,003
299.
306
00:13:34,013 --> 00:13:36,013
I'm almost there.
307
00:13:38,001 --> 00:13:39,021
Just hang on
one more second,
308
00:13:40,001 --> 00:13:41,001
just one more second.
309
00:13:41,006 --> 00:13:42,006
One more second.
310
00:13:42,014 --> 00:13:44,004
Hang on,
hang in there.
311
00:13:44,006 --> 00:13:46,006
Keep hanging on,
stay with me.
312
00:13:46,010 --> 00:13:48,010
Stay just like that,
just like that.
313
00:13:48,010 --> 00:13:50,010
Just like that.
314
00:13:51,019 --> 00:13:54,009
Get 'em off me,
get 'em off me!
315
00:13:54,007 --> 00:13:57,017
You're distracting me.
316
00:13:58,000 --> 00:13:59,020
And when none
of those worked,
317
00:13:59,019 --> 00:14:01,999
they went back to
old faithful...
318
00:14:02,003 --> 00:14:03,013
Number 17.
319
00:14:03,016 --> 00:14:05,996
Okay, now,
that's it.
320
00:14:06,002 --> 00:14:07,012
Now we got it.
321
00:14:07,016 --> 00:14:09,006
Here we go.
322
00:14:09,007 --> 00:14:10,007
Home free.
323
00:14:10,010 --> 00:14:12,010
Just keep doing exactly
what you're doing.
324
00:14:12,015 --> 00:14:15,995
Exactly what
you're doing.
325
00:14:16,004 --> 00:14:18,024
E-e-exactly
What you're doing.
326
00:14:18,023 --> 00:14:25,013
Don't stop.
327
00:14:23,008 --> 00:14:25,008
Don't stop.
328
00:14:25,016 --> 00:14:26,006
Don't stop!
329
00:14:26,016 --> 00:14:29,016
I gotta pick up my stuff
at the cleaners by five.
330
00:14:29,022 --> 00:14:31,022
Okay, stop.
331
00:14:31,019 --> 00:14:34,999
I want you to make it very clear
to the Philadelphia florist...
332
00:14:35,006 --> 00:14:37,006
Tasteful,
all white.
333
00:14:37,016 --> 00:14:40,016
The Casablanca lilies,
the calla lilies,
334
00:14:40,018 --> 00:14:41,998
and the phalaenopsis.
335
00:14:42,002 --> 00:14:43,022
I don't want
any crap.
336
00:14:43,018 --> 00:14:44,998
You told her.
337
00:14:45,002 --> 00:14:46,012
Well, these flowers
are gonna be
338
00:14:46,012 --> 00:14:47,022
the centerpiece on
the church altar.
339
00:14:47,023 --> 00:14:50,023
I think it's important that they
represent us, don't you agree?
340
00:14:50,021 --> 00:14:51,021
Samantha?
341
00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:54,010
Oh, I don't know,
I'm not even listening.
342
00:14:54,016 --> 00:14:57,006
I lost my orgasm.
343
00:14:57,013 --> 00:14:58,023
In the cab?
344
00:14:59,001 --> 00:15:00,021
What do you mean,
"lost"?
345
00:15:01,001 --> 00:15:03,001
I mean, I just spent
the last two hours
346
00:15:03,005 --> 00:15:04,005
fucking with
no finale.
347
00:15:04,016 --> 00:15:05,016
It happens.
348
00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:07,000
Sometimes you just
can't get there.
349
00:15:07,005 --> 00:15:08,015
I can always
get there.
350
00:15:08,020 --> 00:15:11,000
Every time
you have sex?
351
00:15:11,004 --> 00:15:14,004
She's exaggerating.
352
00:15:15,008 --> 00:15:16,998
Please say
you're exaggerating.
353
00:15:17,004 --> 00:15:20,004
Well, I'll admit I have had
to polish myself off
354
00:15:20,003 --> 00:15:21,023
once or twice,
but yes.
355
00:15:21,021 --> 00:15:23,011
When I r.s.v.p.
To a party,
356
00:15:23,010 --> 00:15:24,020
I make it my business
to come.
357
00:15:24,023 --> 00:15:27,023
See, I've been a no-show
on more than one occasion.
358
00:15:27,019 --> 00:15:30,999
Sex can still be great
without an orgasm.
359
00:15:31,006 --> 00:15:32,016
That is such
a crock of shit.
360
00:15:32,018 --> 00:15:33,018
She has a point.
361
00:15:34,017 --> 00:15:36,007
What's wrong
with me?
362
00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:37,020
Listen!
363
00:15:38,001 --> 00:15:42,011
You've got plenty of
orgasms under your belt.
364
00:15:42,009 --> 00:15:43,019
You're gonna
be fine.
365
00:15:44,001 --> 00:15:46,011
Now, let's retrace
your steps.
366
00:15:46,013 --> 00:15:48,003
Were you on top?
367
00:15:48,003 --> 00:15:50,003
Well, how is
that relevant?
368
00:15:50,003 --> 00:15:51,023
You mean, you can have them
on the bottom?
369
00:15:51,022 --> 00:15:53,022
Top, bottom,
upside-down.
370
00:15:53,019 --> 00:15:55,009
Alright, now you're just
showing off.
371
00:15:55,009 --> 00:15:56,019
I'm asking for help!
372
00:15:57,001 --> 00:15:58,011
Sweetie...
373
00:15:58,016 --> 00:16:02,006
I'm sure it will pop up
when you least expect it.
374
00:16:02,012 --> 00:16:04,012
Like...
375
00:16:05,003 --> 00:16:06,013
Jury duty.
376
00:16:06,007 --> 00:16:07,017
Unless...
377
00:16:07,019 --> 00:16:09,009
What?
378
00:16:09,007 --> 00:16:10,997
I read this article
about a woman
379
00:16:11,004 --> 00:16:13,024
who's having orgasms
'round the clock.
380
00:16:13,018 --> 00:16:16,008
-Uh-huh...
-And then boom!
381
00:16:16,012 --> 00:16:18,012
Orgasms stopped...
382
00:16:18,007 --> 00:16:19,017
For good.
383
00:16:19,019 --> 00:16:23,009
It was like she had used
them all up or something.
384
00:16:24,018 --> 00:16:26,998
That's the meanest thing
you've ever said to me.
385
00:16:29,016 --> 00:16:31,016
Meanwhile,
in Philadelphia,
386
00:16:31,019 --> 00:16:33,009
Miranda realized...
387
00:16:33,008 --> 00:16:36,018
she needed
the shitty black bra to go with
her shitty black dress.
388
00:16:37,001 --> 00:16:38,011
Can I help you
find something?
389
00:16:38,015 --> 00:16:41,015
No, I'm looking for this
in 36A in black.
390
00:16:41,021 --> 00:16:44,011
You don't look like
a 36A to me.
391
00:16:44,016 --> 00:16:46,016
Well, I am.
392
00:16:48,006 --> 00:16:49,016
Uh, excuse me?
393
00:16:49,020 --> 00:16:51,010
Lucille?
394
00:16:51,012 --> 00:16:53,012
I've been a 36A
my whole life,
395
00:16:53,008 --> 00:16:54,018
I think I know
what size I am.
396
00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:56,020
Didn't think so.
397
00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:00,020
Try these.
398
00:17:00,017 --> 00:17:02,017
There is no way
that I'm a 34B.
399
00:17:02,023 --> 00:17:05,013
Just try them.
400
00:17:06,018 --> 00:17:08,008
How's it going
in there?
401
00:17:08,015 --> 00:17:10,005
Fine.
Everything's fine.
402
00:17:10,012 --> 00:17:13,012
From the age of 14,
Miranda had a strict
403
00:17:13,009 --> 00:17:15,009
"no visitors policy"
in the dressing room.
404
00:17:15,009 --> 00:17:16,999
Let's see how
that's working out.
405
00:17:17,003 --> 00:17:19,013
Although her mother
never observed it,
406
00:17:19,016 --> 00:17:20,016
and neither
did Lucille.
407
00:17:21,001 --> 00:17:23,011
Um, I just said that
I didn't need any help.
408
00:17:23,008 --> 00:17:24,998
Oh, you say you
don't want help,
409
00:17:25,002 --> 00:17:26,012
but you were picking out
the wrong size.
410
00:17:26,012 --> 00:17:28,022
See now,
this one fits you.
411
00:17:28,021 --> 00:17:31,021
I think that I can adjust
my bra straps by myself.
412
00:17:32,001 --> 00:17:35,001
Would you please get your hands
off of my breasts!
413
00:17:35,003 --> 00:17:36,013
I'm not being fresh.
414
00:17:36,013 --> 00:17:38,013
I think I know
what's best.
415
00:17:38,011 --> 00:17:39,021
No, you don't!
416
00:17:39,021 --> 00:17:43,001
I think that I know
what's best for me!
417
00:17:43,003 --> 00:17:44,023
Suddenly Miranda
realized...
418
00:17:44,023 --> 00:17:48,023
she would never have a fight
with her mother again.
419
00:17:48,020 --> 00:17:51,010
I'm sorry,
it's not you.
420
00:17:51,010 --> 00:17:53,010
My mother
just died...
421
00:17:53,012 --> 00:17:55,022
And...
422
00:17:55,020 --> 00:17:58,020
-Come here.
-No, I'm, I'm fine, I--
423
00:17:58,020 --> 00:18:01,000
I'm-- I'm--
424
00:18:01,005 --> 00:18:03,015
And there, behind the
curtain when no one
was looking,
425
00:18:03,023 --> 00:18:09,003
Miranda found a kind of support
that actually fit her.
426
00:18:19,002 --> 00:18:21,002
Well, this is perfect.
427
00:18:23,002 --> 00:18:25,002
You were right.
428
00:18:27,008 --> 00:18:28,998
Thanks.
429
00:18:31,008 --> 00:18:34,008
Wait!
430
00:18:34,008 --> 00:18:37,008
Oh, damn, you're always
sneaking up on me.
431
00:18:37,008 --> 00:18:38,018
Surprise!
432
00:18:38,020 --> 00:18:40,020
It's your
new computer.
433
00:18:42,001 --> 00:18:44,011
Whoa!
434
00:18:44,009 --> 00:18:45,009
It's blue.
435
00:18:45,013 --> 00:18:48,023
Yeah.
It's a lot more fun
than your old one.
436
00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:51,010
It's got this handle
so, it's like a little purse.
437
00:18:51,007 --> 00:18:54,007
That's a very
expensive purse.
438
00:18:55,019 --> 00:18:57,009
When-- when did you
get that?
439
00:18:57,015 --> 00:18:58,995
Today.
440
00:18:59,004 --> 00:19:00,024
And I got you one of
these zip drives
441
00:19:00,023 --> 00:19:03,013
so, you can start
backing up your work now.
442
00:19:03,016 --> 00:19:05,016
Well, I don't even
know how to use that
443
00:19:05,020 --> 00:19:08,020
and I don't need it,
I have my own system.
444
00:19:08,022 --> 00:19:09,022
Works just fine.
445
00:19:09,022 --> 00:19:11,012
Oh, yeah, right.
446
00:19:11,009 --> 00:19:12,019
You sure
about that?
447
00:19:12,023 --> 00:19:14,003
Yeah, I am.
448
00:19:14,004 --> 00:19:16,014
I'm not ready for
a new computer.
449
00:19:16,014 --> 00:19:18,024
I'm still waiting to hear back
about my old one.
450
00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:22,000
My whole life was
on that computer.
451
00:19:23,002 --> 00:19:25,022
I get it.
452
00:19:25,020 --> 00:19:27,010
It's all you.
453
00:19:27,010 --> 00:19:30,010
I'm not a part
of any of this.
You don't want the laptop.
454
00:19:30,011 --> 00:19:32,011
You don't want me to
go to the funeral.
I feel like a fucking--
455
00:19:32,015 --> 00:19:35,005
I gave you my keys,
what more do you want?
456
00:19:35,012 --> 00:19:36,022
Your keys?
457
00:19:36,021 --> 00:19:41,011
Oh, great, so, now I can
get into your front door.
458
00:19:41,016 --> 00:19:43,006
How do I get
into there?
459
00:19:43,008 --> 00:19:44,018
Huh?
460
00:19:47,014 --> 00:19:49,024
I'm sorry, but I've been
taking care of myself
461
00:19:49,023 --> 00:19:51,013
for a really
long time.
462
00:19:51,010 --> 00:19:56,000
You may not like it, but this is
how I deal with things.
463
00:19:56,003 --> 00:19:57,023
This is your receipt so...
464
00:19:57,017 --> 00:20:01,007
you can do whatever you want
with that computer, alright?
465
00:20:01,012 --> 00:20:03,012
And...
466
00:20:09,016 --> 00:20:14,006
Meanwhile, Samantha was
troubleshooting her own laptop.
467
00:20:20,009 --> 00:20:23,999
She was determined
to just relax,
468
00:20:24,002 --> 00:20:25,012
unwind...
469
00:20:31,014 --> 00:20:34,024
and let the rest
of the world fall away.
470
00:20:39,002 --> 00:20:40,002
What?
471
00:20:40,002 --> 00:20:41,022
Oh, good, you're there.
472
00:20:41,019 --> 00:20:43,009
I'm picking up bagels
for the train ride.
473
00:20:43,012 --> 00:20:44,012
You're sesame, right?
474
00:20:44,009 --> 00:20:45,999
Oh, and have you
called Miranda yet?
475
00:20:46,004 --> 00:20:47,024
No, I'm whole wheat
476
00:20:47,020 --> 00:20:51,010
and I haven't called her because
I don't want to bother her.
477
00:20:51,012 --> 00:20:54,022
Charlotte,
I'm masturbating.
478
00:20:54,018 --> 00:20:58,998
I told you I'd be doing
that all day today.
479
00:21:07,002 --> 00:21:08,022
By nightfall,
480
00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:11,010
Samantha called off
the search party.
481
00:21:19,002 --> 00:21:23,012
Somewhere in the city of
lost dreams and missing persons
482
00:21:23,007 --> 00:21:26,017
Samantha's orgasm
remained at large.
483
00:21:28,010 --> 00:21:29,020
The next morning
484
00:21:29,021 --> 00:21:32,021
my own search party called
with news of a breakthrough.
485
00:21:32,020 --> 00:21:34,020
Hi... Hi.
486
00:21:35,011 --> 00:21:37,011
Hi, do you remember me?
487
00:21:37,011 --> 00:21:41,001
I'm number P-4-3-8-W,
you have my computer.
488
00:21:41,021 --> 00:21:43,011
Yep.
489
00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:47,000
Okay.
490
00:21:51,003 --> 00:21:54,003
And here's what we could
recover from your hard drive.
491
00:21:54,005 --> 00:21:55,995
Any of that look
familiar to you?
492
00:21:56,002 --> 00:21:58,012
There it was,
my past.
493
00:21:58,009 --> 00:21:59,019
It was a mess.
494
00:22:00,018 --> 00:22:01,998
Can you...
495
00:22:02,006 --> 00:22:04,996
Please tell me why this
happened in the first place?
496
00:22:05,005 --> 00:22:06,005
Well, we don't know.
497
00:22:06,008 --> 00:22:09,008
Sometimes these things,
they just crash.
498
00:22:09,009 --> 00:22:11,009
Now, we can replace
your motherboard,
499
00:22:11,010 --> 00:22:14,010
but you have to get yourself
a back-up system.
500
00:22:14,016 --> 00:22:16,016
Pick out a zip drive,
start saving.
501
00:22:16,023 --> 00:22:19,003
Next time you won't
lose everything.
502
00:22:20,012 --> 00:22:22,002
Ouch.
503
00:22:22,005 --> 00:22:24,015
You saved
your warrantee, right?
504
00:22:41,002 --> 00:22:43,012
Hello, furniture company.
505
00:22:43,011 --> 00:22:46,021
It's me, the girl
who doesn't back up.
506
00:22:46,021 --> 00:22:48,001
Um...
507
00:22:48,004 --> 00:22:51,024
This is my attempt
to breathe and reboot.
508
00:22:52,001 --> 00:22:53,021
Are you smiling
at all over there?
509
00:22:53,023 --> 00:22:55,003
I'm listening.
510
00:22:55,004 --> 00:22:56,014
Okay, well.
511
00:22:56,013 --> 00:23:00,023
I'm just on
my way to Philly, and...
512
00:23:01,000 --> 00:23:04,000
I just wanted to
say that I'm sorry.
513
00:23:05,007 --> 00:23:06,017
This is hard.
514
00:23:06,022 --> 00:23:09,022
We're gonna run into
stuff that's hard.
515
00:23:10,001 --> 00:23:11,021
That's why I was
trying to help.
516
00:23:11,023 --> 00:23:13,023
Well. I know,
I know that, but--
517
00:23:15,003 --> 00:23:17,013
If you start
helping me
518
00:23:17,007 --> 00:23:19,997
and then I get used to
having that help...
519
00:23:20,005 --> 00:23:21,005
Yeah?
520
00:23:21,015 --> 00:23:22,005
Well...
521
00:23:22,015 --> 00:23:24,005
No good can
come of that.
522
00:23:24,013 --> 00:23:27,013
I mean, then what happens
when, you know,
523
00:23:27,013 --> 00:23:29,023
you're not
around one day?
524
00:23:29,022 --> 00:23:31,022
-Where am I going?
-Well, I don't know.
525
00:23:31,020 --> 00:23:36,000
You could be out of town
or be busy or...
526
00:23:36,003 --> 00:23:38,013
Things fall apart.
527
00:23:38,012 --> 00:23:40,022
We could fall apart.
528
00:23:40,018 --> 00:23:42,018
I know that.
529
00:23:42,019 --> 00:23:43,019
Well, then what?
530
00:23:43,019 --> 00:23:46,999
Then I guess we'd be
a couple of sad macs.
531
00:23:54,014 --> 00:23:55,014
Philadelphia...
532
00:23:55,013 --> 00:23:57,023
just a hop, a skip,
a cab, a Metroliner
533
00:23:57,020 --> 00:24:00,000
and another cab away.
534
00:24:09,005 --> 00:24:11,995
I'm not gonna find
my orgasm in this town.
535
00:24:12,005 --> 00:24:13,005
We are at
a funeral.
536
00:24:31,008 --> 00:24:32,018
Be right back.
537
00:24:40,016 --> 00:24:47,996
I'm so sorry.
538
00:24:52,015 --> 00:24:54,005
You look great.
539
00:24:55,022 --> 00:24:57,022
Well, she does.
540
00:24:58,019 --> 00:24:59,019
How are you?
541
00:25:00,000 --> 00:25:01,020
I'm fine.
542
00:25:01,018 --> 00:25:03,998
But everybody else is
very concerned about me
543
00:25:04,002 --> 00:25:05,012
because I'm
here alone.
544
00:25:05,007 --> 00:25:08,007
I didn't realize I needed a date
for my mother's funeral.
545
00:25:08,013 --> 00:25:10,013
Oh, Miranda.
546
00:25:10,008 --> 00:25:11,018
My sister
and her husband
547
00:25:11,020 --> 00:25:14,010
want me to third wheel
with them down the aisle,
548
00:25:14,010 --> 00:25:16,020
God forbid that
I should walk it alone,
549
00:25:16,021 --> 00:25:18,021
because that would be
the real tragedy, right?
550
00:25:18,023 --> 00:25:19,023
Ignore the coffin.
551
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:23,010
There's a single 35-year-old
woman walking behind it.
552
00:25:23,007 --> 00:25:26,007
Miranda?
-Coming, Betsy.
553
00:25:29,009 --> 00:25:30,019
Wow.
554
00:25:30,022 --> 00:25:33,002
Well, this is hard.
555
00:25:34,017 --> 00:25:36,007
"You look great"?
556
00:25:36,008 --> 00:25:38,018
That was not one of the things
I told you to say.
557
00:25:41,016 --> 00:25:43,006
Excuse me, Betsy?
558
00:25:43,009 --> 00:25:45,009
Hi, I'm Charlotte,
we spoke on the phone.
559
00:25:45,012 --> 00:25:46,012
Oh.
560
00:25:46,011 --> 00:25:48,021
I just wanted to say
again how sorry I am.
561
00:25:48,017 --> 00:25:51,017
And to make sure that everything
worked out with the flowers.
562
00:25:52,001 --> 00:25:53,011
Yes, thank you.
563
00:25:53,013 --> 00:25:56,013
In fact,
there they are now.
564
00:26:04,013 --> 00:26:08,013
I said tasteful!
565
00:26:08,011 --> 00:26:11,021
I think now we know what $500
worth of glitter looks like.
566
00:26:12,019 --> 00:26:16,009
Death is
the eternal mystery.
567
00:26:16,008 --> 00:26:19,018
It defies
our comprehension.
568
00:26:19,018 --> 00:26:23,008
There are no explanations.
No answers.
569
00:26:23,009 --> 00:26:26,019
No magic words
to soothe us.
570
00:26:26,021 --> 00:26:28,021
You're a spiritual leader,
can't you make something up?
571
00:26:28,022 --> 00:26:31,012
Those flowers were
supposed to say...
572
00:26:31,011 --> 00:26:33,021
"We're so sorry,
we love you."
573
00:26:33,023 --> 00:26:35,023
Not "You're dead,
let's disco."
574
00:26:35,022 --> 00:26:37,022
...so many wonderful
stories about her
575
00:26:37,022 --> 00:26:41,012
from her daughter Betsy
and her husband, David,
576
00:26:41,013 --> 00:26:44,023
her son John
and his wife, Miranda,
577
00:26:44,020 --> 00:26:46,020
her daughter
Catherine...
578
00:26:46,019 --> 00:26:48,019
Did he just say...
579
00:26:48,021 --> 00:26:51,001
No spiritual stuff
and he can't keep
580
00:26:51,005 --> 00:26:53,005
the family tree
straight?
581
00:26:53,008 --> 00:26:55,018
This guy's
a hack.
582
00:26:55,017 --> 00:27:00,017
Sara, Alexandra, Nathan,
and little Emily.
583
00:27:01,021 --> 00:27:03,011
After the burial...
584
00:27:03,014 --> 00:27:08,014
John and his wife, Miranda,
invite you back to their home.
585
00:27:08,015 --> 00:27:14,005
Directions can be found
as you exit the sanctuary.
586
00:27:16,019 --> 00:27:18,999
I'm sorry.
587
00:27:25,013 --> 00:27:29,003
Finally, Samantha found
the release she really needed.
588
00:27:29,004 --> 00:27:30,024
She cried for everything
she couldn't say
589
00:27:30,022 --> 00:27:34,012
and for things she didn't
even know she felt.
590
00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:02,010
It's okay.
591
00:28:02,008 --> 00:28:04,008
There's the kind of
support you ask for
592
00:28:04,007 --> 00:28:07,007
and the kind of support
you don't ask for.
593
00:28:09,004 --> 00:28:12,024
And then there's the kind
that just shows up.
594
00:28:16,002 --> 00:28:17,012
Hey.
595
00:28:32,020 --> 00:28:34,000
After all,
596
00:28:34,002 --> 00:28:36,012
computers crash,
people die,
597
00:28:36,007 --> 00:28:37,997
relationships
fall apart.
598
00:28:38,004 --> 00:28:42,014
The best we can do
is breathe and reboot.
599
00:28:45,010 --> 00:28:46,020
And when that fails,
600
00:28:47,001 --> 00:28:49,011
a little gizmo
called a zip drive
601
00:28:49,010 --> 00:28:52,010
can provide a surprising
amount of comfort.
602
00:29:00,007 --> 00:29:02,007
So can a boyfriend...
603
00:29:03,008 --> 00:29:05,018
if you can learn
to let him.