1 00:00:57,000 --> 00:00:58,380 [Carrie] New York City... 2 00:00:58,458 --> 00:01:00,378 home to one million exciting, 3 00:01:00,458 --> 00:01:03,208 eligible, single men... 4 00:01:03,291 --> 00:01:06,831 and four cold, and slightly cranky, single women. 5 00:01:06,917 --> 00:01:08,077 Well, this is good. 6 00:01:08,166 --> 00:01:10,416 We're actually crossing water to meet men. 7 00:01:10,500 --> 00:01:13,460 Reminder, I'm not going to Staten Island to meet men... 8 00:01:13,917 --> 00:01:16,207 I am going to judge them. 9 00:01:16,291 --> 00:01:19,171 -Once of the perks of being a minor New York celebrity... -A little help, a little help. 10 00:01:19,250 --> 00:01:21,580 ...is that you get invited to major events... 11 00:01:21,667 --> 00:01:23,577 like the Fire Department of New York's 12 00:01:23,667 --> 00:01:25,957 Annual Calendar Competition. 13 00:01:26,875 --> 00:01:28,415 This is an awfully long way to go 14 00:01:28,500 --> 00:01:30,710 to watch some firemen take their shirts off. 15 00:01:30,792 --> 00:01:32,422 Honey, I'm on the fucking ferry. 16 00:01:32,500 --> 00:01:34,040 I better see more than just pecs. 17 00:01:34,125 --> 00:01:36,705 -[laughter] -Ooh! I'm freezing! 18 00:01:37,709 --> 00:01:39,379 I just-- I don't understand 19 00:01:39,458 --> 00:01:42,328 why they couldn't just hold the competition in a bar in Manhattan. 20 00:01:42,417 --> 00:01:44,917 I mean, they have firemen on the Upper East Side too, you know? 21 00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:46,330 Yes, I know, they do, sweetie. 22 00:01:46,417 --> 00:01:49,327 And they only put out the really top-notch fires. 23 00:01:50,750 --> 00:01:52,630 Look at how small it looks. 24 00:01:53,333 --> 00:01:55,423 [Miranda] Who would've thought an island that tiny 25 00:01:55,500 --> 00:01:59,170 would be big enough to hold all our old boyfriends? 26 00:02:03,208 --> 00:02:05,168 [upbeat music] 27 00:02:05,875 --> 00:02:09,995 [announcer] Paul Roncello. He's a Virgo. He loves to cook. 28 00:02:10,083 --> 00:02:12,793 Says he can whip up a great baked ziti. 29 00:02:12,875 --> 00:02:16,375 He's from Engine 275, Ladder 133. 30 00:02:16,458 --> 00:02:19,078 Way, way out in Queens! 31 00:02:19,166 --> 00:02:20,536 [cheering] 32 00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:26,540 ♪ Sittin' here eatin' my heart out, waitin' ♪ 33 00:02:26,625 --> 00:02:29,825 ♪ Waitin' for some lover to call ♪ 34 00:02:33,542 --> 00:02:34,962 Is he hot? 35 00:02:35,041 --> 00:02:36,381 He's a six. 36 00:02:36,458 --> 00:02:37,958 On a scale of how many? 37 00:02:38,041 --> 00:02:39,381 ♪ Lookin' for some hot stuff ♪ 38 00:02:39,458 --> 00:02:41,128 [Carrie] His name was Bill Kelley. 39 00:02:41,208 --> 00:02:42,538 He was a divorced politician 40 00:02:42,625 --> 00:02:45,165 campaigning for New York City Comptroller... 41 00:02:45,250 --> 00:02:47,710 and the token male judge. 42 00:02:50,709 --> 00:02:52,329 Watch the firemen! 43 00:02:52,417 --> 00:02:54,417 I'm more into cops. 44 00:02:54,500 --> 00:02:58,130 [announcer] Billy McCloud, he's a Cancer and married! 45 00:02:58,750 --> 00:03:00,670 Sorry, ladies! 46 00:03:00,750 --> 00:03:03,290 His wife Maria, she says he's a good guy, 47 00:03:03,375 --> 00:03:05,625 -but he works too hard. -[Miranda] Excuse me. 48 00:03:05,709 --> 00:03:08,879 -Work it, Billy! Whoa! -[all cheering] 49 00:03:12,917 --> 00:03:15,417 Ladies, over here! 50 00:03:16,583 --> 00:03:18,833 Okay, they don't make cosmopolitans. 51 00:03:18,917 --> 00:03:21,127 It's a Staten Island Iced Tea. 52 00:03:21,208 --> 00:03:23,668 Is that like a Long Island Iced Tea? 53 00:03:23,750 --> 00:03:25,210 I think so. 54 00:03:26,542 --> 00:03:28,002 Hello, I'm drunk. 55 00:03:28,417 --> 00:03:31,667 [Charlotte] Do we have to be this close? It's embarrassing. 56 00:03:31,750 --> 00:03:33,920 You gotta be in it to win it. 57 00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:35,330 I'm moving back. 58 00:03:35,417 --> 00:03:37,787 No, come on, I can't see the cute firemen 59 00:03:37,875 --> 00:03:39,575 from back there without my glasses. 60 00:03:39,667 --> 00:03:42,167 Why do you even care if you can see? You have Steve. 61 00:03:42,250 --> 00:03:43,630 I do not have Steve. 62 00:03:43,709 --> 00:03:45,539 There is no having of the Steve. 63 00:03:45,625 --> 00:03:46,955 We're just friends. 64 00:03:47,041 --> 00:03:49,881 No, we're just friends, I don't put my dick in you. 65 00:03:49,959 --> 00:03:52,379 Another one of these and I might let you. 66 00:03:52,458 --> 00:03:53,378 [laughing] 67 00:03:53,458 --> 00:03:55,208 There are no datable men here. 68 00:03:55,291 --> 00:03:56,881 What was your first clue, 69 00:03:56,959 --> 00:03:59,829 the pleather jackets or the smell of Hai Karate? 70 00:03:59,917 --> 00:04:02,917 [announcer] This is Ricky Fantucci, he's a Capricorn, 71 00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:05,420 all his uncles are firefighters. 72 00:04:05,500 --> 00:04:09,880 Yes, ladies, that's a cheetah on his arm! 73 00:04:09,959 --> 00:04:11,289 [screaming] 74 00:04:11,375 --> 00:04:16,825 Ricky represents from Engine 53 in lower Manhattan! 75 00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:21,290 I'd like to show him my lower Manhattan. 76 00:04:22,041 --> 00:04:23,461 Ew. 77 00:04:24,208 --> 00:04:26,828 [Samantha] Look at his arms, they're huge. 78 00:04:26,917 --> 00:04:28,497 You know what they say... 79 00:04:28,583 --> 00:04:31,213 "Big arms, big arms." 80 00:04:31,291 --> 00:04:33,581 Hello, 911? 81 00:04:33,667 --> 00:04:36,127 I'm on fire. 82 00:04:36,208 --> 00:04:39,458 ["Bad Girls" by Donna Summer playing] 83 00:04:39,542 --> 00:04:50,792 ♪ Toot toot, Hey, beep beep ♪ 84 00:04:50,875 --> 00:04:53,285 [Carrie] After the contest, I began to realize 85 00:04:53,375 --> 00:04:57,125 that Staten Island was like a quaint European country. 86 00:04:57,208 --> 00:04:59,668 The American music was 20 years behind 87 00:04:59,750 --> 00:05:02,630 and you could smoke wherever you wanted. 88 00:05:02,709 --> 00:05:07,129 ♪ Talking about Bad girls, yeah ♪ 89 00:05:07,208 --> 00:05:11,378 ♪ See them out on the street At night, walking ♪ 90 00:05:11,458 --> 00:05:14,168 ♪ Picking up All kinds of strangers ♪ 91 00:05:14,250 --> 00:05:16,040 ♪ If the price is right ♪ 92 00:05:16,125 --> 00:05:18,995 ♪ You can score If your pocket's nice ♪ 93 00:05:20,125 --> 00:05:22,705 ♪ But you want a good time ♪ 94 00:05:23,792 --> 00:05:24,832 Hi. 95 00:05:25,291 --> 00:05:26,831 Do you know if those shirts are for sale 96 00:05:26,917 --> 00:05:29,787 because I'd like to get one for my nephew. 97 00:05:29,875 --> 00:05:31,875 Uh, yeah, you could buy 'em, but like, 98 00:05:31,959 --> 00:05:33,709 I don't know if you can buy 'em here or not. 99 00:05:33,792 --> 00:05:35,292 I got this one at work, 100 00:05:35,375 --> 00:05:37,415 but I'm sure you can buy 'em in like those other places. 101 00:05:37,500 --> 00:05:39,670 I've seen 'em in those shops, like on Bleecker or-- 102 00:05:39,750 --> 00:05:41,000 Samantha. 103 00:05:41,083 --> 00:05:44,133 -Ricky, how you doing? -Good, how are you doing? 104 00:05:44,208 --> 00:05:45,998 I saw you up there. 105 00:05:46,083 --> 00:05:47,133 I saw you too. 106 00:05:47,208 --> 00:05:48,788 You looked fantastic. 107 00:05:48,875 --> 00:05:49,995 -Yeah? -Yeah. 108 00:05:50,083 --> 00:05:51,833 I never did anything like that before. 109 00:05:51,917 --> 00:05:53,537 But my sisters were like, "Do it Ricky," 110 00:05:53,625 --> 00:05:55,665 and I'm like, "I never did anything like that before." 111 00:05:55,750 --> 00:05:56,790 And they're like-- 112 00:05:56,875 --> 00:05:58,995 Well, you did it very well. 113 00:05:59,083 --> 00:06:02,043 Hey, I wonder what month you'll be. 114 00:06:02,125 --> 00:06:03,665 I don't know, maybe like October. 115 00:06:03,750 --> 00:06:05,170 My birthday's in October. 116 00:06:05,250 --> 00:06:09,500 I'll bet July or any month that's hot. [laughs] 117 00:06:09,583 --> 00:06:12,173 [Carrie] Two songs later it was time for this dancing queen 118 00:06:12,250 --> 00:06:14,170 to take a breather. 119 00:06:14,250 --> 00:06:15,330 Hello. 120 00:06:15,417 --> 00:06:17,167 -Hi. -Can I bum a smoke? 121 00:06:17,250 --> 00:06:19,080 -Sure. -Thanks. 122 00:06:19,166 --> 00:06:20,496 There you go. 123 00:06:21,500 --> 00:06:23,170 Mmm... 124 00:06:23,250 --> 00:06:25,080 Man, that's good. 125 00:06:25,166 --> 00:06:26,576 I quit three years ago. 126 00:06:26,667 --> 00:06:27,747 How's that working out for you? 127 00:06:27,834 --> 00:06:30,424 Good, I allow myself one a week. 128 00:06:30,500 --> 00:06:32,790 Mmm, you live right on the edge, don't you? 129 00:06:33,375 --> 00:06:34,495 Can I buy you a beer? 130 00:06:34,583 --> 00:06:35,713 No, thanks, I got it. 131 00:06:35,792 --> 00:06:36,882 C'mon, it's on me. 132 00:06:36,959 --> 00:06:38,579 For helping me out during the contest. 133 00:06:38,667 --> 00:06:40,037 Okay, sure. 134 00:06:40,625 --> 00:06:43,705 And by the way, you have the worst taste in men ever. 135 00:06:43,792 --> 00:06:45,212 No way. 136 00:06:45,709 --> 00:06:48,419 You gave that guy from midtown a seven. 137 00:06:48,500 --> 00:06:50,380 Hey, I like a firefighter with love handles. 138 00:06:50,458 --> 00:06:52,208 Gives you something to hold onto when you ride him 139 00:06:52,291 --> 00:06:53,581 down the side of a burning building. 140 00:06:53,667 --> 00:06:55,537 You got a point there, my friend. 141 00:06:55,625 --> 00:06:57,205 But you, you were tough. 142 00:06:57,291 --> 00:06:59,381 And what's with all those half points? 143 00:06:59,458 --> 00:07:01,078 Six and a half, eight and a half? 144 00:07:01,166 --> 00:07:04,496 What can I say? Sometimes a girl needs a half. 145 00:07:06,333 --> 00:07:07,383 So... 146 00:07:07,625 --> 00:07:09,955 Which district do you vote in? 147 00:07:10,834 --> 00:07:13,044 Whichever one is near Barneys. 148 00:07:13,125 --> 00:07:15,205 Are you saying you've never voted in New York City? 149 00:07:15,291 --> 00:07:17,131 You are correct, Mr. President. 150 00:07:17,333 --> 00:07:18,793 What's your address? 151 00:07:18,875 --> 00:07:21,915 Official government purposes, I can tell you your district. 152 00:07:22,458 --> 00:07:26,578 Officially, it's 245 East 73rd Street. 153 00:07:26,667 --> 00:07:27,827 -District 23. -Mmm. 154 00:07:27,917 --> 00:07:29,077 Same as mine. 155 00:07:29,166 --> 00:07:30,916 I'm at Madison and 82nd. 156 00:07:31,000 --> 00:07:32,290 Fancy. 157 00:07:32,375 --> 00:07:34,915 I thought all honest politicians lived in small studios 158 00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:36,500 and ate beans out of a can. 159 00:07:36,583 --> 00:07:38,173 I'm not a fan of beans. 160 00:07:39,667 --> 00:07:41,207 Can I get your phone number? 161 00:07:41,291 --> 00:07:43,251 Government purposes only. 162 00:07:43,333 --> 00:07:45,133 You know what? I'm just here with my friends 163 00:07:45,208 --> 00:07:46,288 having a good time. 164 00:07:46,375 --> 00:07:47,995 I'm not really into dating right now. 165 00:07:48,083 --> 00:07:49,713 Why, bad break up? 166 00:08:04,959 --> 00:08:07,039 That was a long silence. 167 00:08:07,500 --> 00:08:09,790 Actually, it was a silence and a half. 168 00:08:10,041 --> 00:08:11,541 Have dinner with me. 169 00:08:13,458 --> 00:08:15,378 Would it help if I took my shirt off? 170 00:08:15,458 --> 00:08:16,668 [Carrie laughs] 171 00:08:18,166 --> 00:08:20,706 Okay, time to go, politician's hittin' on me. 172 00:08:20,792 --> 00:08:22,712 And is that a bad thing? 173 00:08:22,792 --> 00:08:25,212 He's just way too "I'm the guy." 174 00:08:25,291 --> 00:08:27,171 Are you sure? He's pretty cute. 175 00:08:27,250 --> 00:08:29,040 I didn't want to have to tell you this, 176 00:08:29,125 --> 00:08:31,625 but I actually saw him give someone a thumbs up. 177 00:08:31,709 --> 00:08:33,169 We're outta here. 178 00:08:33,250 --> 00:08:35,790 Samantha went home with that firefighter. 179 00:08:35,875 --> 00:08:37,245 "Toot toot, beep beep." 180 00:08:37,333 --> 00:08:39,463 And Charlotte's around here somewhere. 181 00:08:41,709 --> 00:08:44,669 How many cocktails did she have? 182 00:08:44,750 --> 00:08:47,000 A couple, why? 183 00:08:47,083 --> 00:08:48,253 [man in song] ♪ Hello ♪ 184 00:08:48,333 --> 00:08:50,673 [woman in song] ♪ Hi, honey, it's me ♪ 185 00:08:50,750 --> 00:08:53,630 ♪ I went to see The doctor today ♪ 186 00:08:53,709 --> 00:08:55,829 ♪ 'Cause ever since You've been gone ♪ 187 00:08:55,917 --> 00:08:59,457 ♪ I had a pain Deep down inside ♪ 188 00:08:59,542 --> 00:09:02,212 ♪ He says there's nothing Really wrong with me ♪ 189 00:09:02,291 --> 00:09:04,711 -♪ I'm just missing my man ♪ -Missing my man! 190 00:09:04,792 --> 00:09:08,462 ♪ So honey, please Come on home ♪ 191 00:09:08,542 --> 00:09:10,712 ♪ As soon as you can ♪ 192 00:09:10,792 --> 00:09:13,672 ♪ Doctors orders ♪ 193 00:09:13,750 --> 00:09:18,580 ♪ Say there's only One thing for me ♪ 194 00:09:18,667 --> 00:09:20,707 ♪ Nothing he can do ♪ 195 00:09:20,792 --> 00:09:23,712 [Carrie] And so, three girls headed home, 196 00:09:23,792 --> 00:09:27,252 taking with them only their fond memories of Staten Island 197 00:09:27,333 --> 00:09:29,173 and its infamous iced teas. 198 00:09:29,250 --> 00:09:31,080 Whoo! 199 00:09:31,375 --> 00:09:34,375 Honey, honey, close up, it's cold. 200 00:09:34,458 --> 00:09:36,498 Whoo-hoo! 201 00:09:37,333 --> 00:09:38,793 Are you gonna help? 202 00:09:38,875 --> 00:09:41,285 I held her head in the taxi. 203 00:09:43,834 --> 00:09:45,544 -Oh... -Oh... 204 00:09:45,625 --> 00:09:47,325 You're so nice, Carrie. 205 00:09:47,417 --> 00:09:49,667 I'm nice too, aren't I? 206 00:09:49,750 --> 00:09:51,420 Yes, you're nice. 207 00:09:51,500 --> 00:09:53,290 I'm nice! 208 00:09:53,375 --> 00:09:56,415 I'm pretty and I'm smart! 209 00:09:56,500 --> 00:09:58,080 I'm a catch. 210 00:09:58,166 --> 00:10:00,286 Yes, you're a catch. 211 00:10:00,375 --> 00:10:02,205 I hate you. 212 00:10:02,291 --> 00:10:03,961 [Charlotte] You know what? 213 00:10:04,583 --> 00:10:08,333 I'm gonna meet the perfect guy and I'm gonna get married. 214 00:10:08,417 --> 00:10:10,997 Yes, you're getting married. 215 00:10:11,083 --> 00:10:12,173 Whoo-hoo! 216 00:10:12,250 --> 00:10:14,250 You hear that, New York? 217 00:10:14,333 --> 00:10:16,713 I'm getting married this year! 218 00:10:17,125 --> 00:10:20,535 I'm getting married and here I come! 219 00:10:20,625 --> 00:10:23,745 If she falls over I will never stop laughing. 220 00:10:23,834 --> 00:10:26,044 [Carrie] I wasn't quite sure if it was the iced teas 221 00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:29,375 or the Staten Island dating pool that broke the camel's back, 222 00:10:29,458 --> 00:10:31,828 but something set Charlotte on fire. 223 00:10:31,917 --> 00:10:34,377 And uptown on dry land... 224 00:10:34,458 --> 00:10:37,998 Samantha and Mr. July had their own fire going. 225 00:10:38,083 --> 00:10:41,753 You're so big and strong! 226 00:10:41,834 --> 00:10:44,504 [moaning] 227 00:10:44,583 --> 00:10:47,833 [Carrie] I believe the official fire department term is 228 00:10:47,917 --> 00:10:49,247 "a four alarmer." 229 00:10:49,333 --> 00:10:50,423 [Carrie] Thank you. 230 00:10:50,500 --> 00:10:51,670 The next morning at breakfast, 231 00:10:51,750 --> 00:10:53,380 Miranda and I wanted poached eggs, 232 00:10:53,458 --> 00:10:55,498 Samantha wanted to give us the juicy details, 233 00:10:55,583 --> 00:10:58,173 and Charlotte wanted to keep her head from exploding 234 00:10:58,250 --> 00:10:59,710 all over her Burberry raincoat. 235 00:10:59,792 --> 00:11:01,042 And I'm telling you, 236 00:11:01,125 --> 00:11:03,205 I don't think a guy's ever gotten me that wet. 237 00:11:03,291 --> 00:11:04,461 -Pass the salt. -Milk? 238 00:11:04,542 --> 00:11:06,292 Ladies, let me tell you about his cock. 239 00:11:06,375 --> 00:11:07,625 [Charlotte] Will you be quiet? 240 00:11:07,709 --> 00:11:10,079 The people at the next table have a child. 241 00:11:11,458 --> 00:11:12,708 Well, that's their choice. 242 00:11:12,792 --> 00:11:14,462 Little Miss Hangover's right. Can we, uh... 243 00:11:14,542 --> 00:11:16,832 lighten up on the cock talk till cocktail time? 244 00:11:16,917 --> 00:11:19,247 Fine. I just wanted to let you know that my fireman 245 00:11:19,333 --> 00:11:21,713 was every bit the fantasy I had in mind. 246 00:11:21,792 --> 00:11:22,922 New York's finest. 247 00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:25,040 -That's cops. -Whatever. 248 00:11:25,125 --> 00:11:27,125 I think it's wrong to sleep with a man 249 00:11:27,208 --> 00:11:28,958 just to fulfill A certain fantasy. 250 00:11:29,041 --> 00:11:31,921 Please, all the men we sleep with fulfill a certain fantasy. 251 00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:34,830 -Or nightmare. -You fantasize a man with a Park Avenue apartment 252 00:11:34,917 --> 00:11:36,497 and a nice big stock portfolio. 253 00:11:36,583 --> 00:11:38,293 For me, it's a fireman with a nice big hose. 254 00:11:38,375 --> 00:11:41,165 -And why are firemen always so fucking cute? -Mmm! 255 00:11:41,250 --> 00:11:43,330 Even when they're not that cute, they're still cute. 256 00:11:43,417 --> 00:11:44,457 What's up with that? 257 00:11:44,542 --> 00:11:46,252 Well, first there's a weight limit. 258 00:11:46,333 --> 00:11:48,043 And second, it's the hero thing. 259 00:11:48,125 --> 00:11:49,665 You know, you see them up on that truck. 260 00:11:49,750 --> 00:11:50,880 Mmm! That truck is hot. 261 00:11:50,959 --> 00:11:52,209 [Carrie] Hurrying off to save someone 262 00:11:52,291 --> 00:11:53,791 trapped on a burning ledge or something. 263 00:11:53,875 --> 00:11:54,995 [Miranda] Plus they've got that 264 00:11:55,083 --> 00:11:56,753 "I'm a good guy" look in their eyes. 265 00:11:56,834 --> 00:11:58,214 It's that look. 266 00:11:58,291 --> 00:12:01,331 It's because women really just want to be rescued. 267 00:12:01,417 --> 00:12:02,877 [Carrie] There it was, 268 00:12:02,959 --> 00:12:05,039 the sentence independent, single women in their 30's 269 00:12:05,125 --> 00:12:07,245 are never supposed to think, let alone say out loud. 270 00:12:07,333 --> 00:12:09,753 [Charlotte] I'm sorry, but it's true. 271 00:12:09,834 --> 00:12:11,214 I've been dating since I was 15. 272 00:12:11,291 --> 00:12:13,381 I'm exhausted, where is he? 273 00:12:13,458 --> 00:12:15,038 Who, the white knight? 274 00:12:15,125 --> 00:12:17,375 That only happens in fairy tales. 275 00:12:17,458 --> 00:12:18,918 My hair hurts. 276 00:12:19,583 --> 00:12:20,923 Charlotte, honey, 277 00:12:21,000 --> 00:12:23,500 did you ever think that maybe we're the white knights 278 00:12:23,583 --> 00:12:26,503 and we're the ones that have to save ourselves? 279 00:12:27,500 --> 00:12:29,580 That is so depressing. 280 00:12:30,125 --> 00:12:32,245 Is it? 281 00:12:32,333 --> 00:12:36,173 [Carrie] Later that day, I got to thinking about fairy tales. 282 00:12:36,250 --> 00:12:39,000 What if Prince Charming had never showed up? 283 00:12:39,083 --> 00:12:42,253 Would Snow White have slept in that glass coffin forever? 284 00:12:42,333 --> 00:12:45,753 Or would she have eventually woken up, spit out the apple, 285 00:12:45,834 --> 00:12:47,464 gotten a job, a health care package, 286 00:12:47,542 --> 00:12:50,332 and a baby from her local neighborhood sperm bank? 287 00:12:50,417 --> 00:12:51,917 I couldn't help but wonder, 288 00:12:52,000 --> 00:12:55,420 inside every confident, driven single woman, 289 00:12:55,500 --> 00:12:58,250 is there a delicate, fragile princess 290 00:12:58,333 --> 00:13:00,293 just waiting to be saved? 291 00:13:00,375 --> 00:13:02,035 Was Charlotte right? 292 00:13:02,125 --> 00:13:05,245 Do women just want to be rescued? 293 00:13:05,333 --> 00:13:08,633 [doctor] And after your laser surgery on Saturday, 294 00:13:08,709 --> 00:13:12,629 you'll need a significant other or a friend 295 00:13:12,709 --> 00:13:15,789 to help get you home... Sign here. 296 00:13:15,875 --> 00:13:18,785 [Carrie] While for some women, the idea of rescue was a life raft, 297 00:13:18,875 --> 00:13:20,325 for Miranda, it was an insult. 298 00:13:20,417 --> 00:13:23,747 I really don't need anybody to help me, I'll be fine. 299 00:13:23,834 --> 00:13:27,084 No, you'll be sedated and your vision will be blurred. 300 00:13:27,166 --> 00:13:30,496 You will need someone to get you home and up to bed. 301 00:13:30,583 --> 00:13:32,883 Then you take two sleeping pills. 302 00:13:32,959 --> 00:13:35,129 Sleep for 12 hours, wake up, 303 00:13:35,208 --> 00:13:36,918 and you'll be able to see perfectly. 304 00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:38,710 I can't believe I'm gonna wake up 305 00:13:38,792 --> 00:13:41,332 and be able to see clearly without glasses or contacts 306 00:13:41,417 --> 00:13:43,787 for the first time in my life. 307 00:13:43,875 --> 00:13:45,035 Believe it. 308 00:13:46,709 --> 00:13:48,709 And then they slit your eyeball open 309 00:13:48,792 --> 00:13:49,832 and flip up the top. 310 00:13:49,917 --> 00:13:51,127 Oh, man, gross. 311 00:13:51,208 --> 00:13:53,918 Steve, it just flips right up, flip, my eye! 312 00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:55,500 Okay, okay, stop. 313 00:13:55,583 --> 00:13:57,463 This little blade cuts it... 314 00:13:57,542 --> 00:13:58,832 Just-- 315 00:13:58,917 --> 00:14:00,577 Like the top of a grape. 316 00:14:00,667 --> 00:14:02,207 [both laughing] 317 00:14:03,291 --> 00:14:05,081 That sounds pretty bad. 318 00:14:06,583 --> 00:14:08,753 You want me to come down and hold your hand? 319 00:14:08,834 --> 00:14:11,754 I'm fine, I do not need anyone to hold my hand. 320 00:14:11,834 --> 00:14:15,254 Jeez, I'm not saying you need anyone, 321 00:14:15,333 --> 00:14:17,173 I'd just like to be there. 322 00:14:17,417 --> 00:14:19,077 To help you, whatever. 323 00:14:19,500 --> 00:14:21,330 You're gonna need help getting home. 324 00:14:21,417 --> 00:14:24,417 Um, yeah, I'm gonna ask Carrie. 325 00:14:26,083 --> 00:14:29,003 Why do you have to ask Carrie when I'm offering right now? 326 00:14:29,083 --> 00:14:32,003 Because, you know, Carrie's my friend. 327 00:14:32,083 --> 00:14:33,883 Oh, okay, and what am I? 328 00:14:33,959 --> 00:14:36,999 Well, we haven't exactly established that yet. 329 00:14:38,500 --> 00:14:39,790 Are you coming up? 330 00:14:39,875 --> 00:14:43,915 Eh... We haven't exactly established that yet. 331 00:14:48,417 --> 00:14:49,787 What are we doing here? 332 00:14:49,875 --> 00:14:50,995 I mean, are we-- 333 00:14:51,083 --> 00:14:52,043 Steve... 334 00:14:52,125 --> 00:14:53,745 After they flip the eye up, 335 00:14:53,834 --> 00:14:55,964 then these jets-- [muffled] 336 00:14:57,583 --> 00:14:59,213 [Carrie] And over on the East Side, 337 00:14:59,291 --> 00:15:01,881 at a more Charlotte-friendly bar, 338 00:15:01,959 --> 00:15:04,289 the Iced Tea Princess began her quest 339 00:15:04,375 --> 00:15:05,875 for a white knight. 340 00:15:05,959 --> 00:15:08,419 Oh my God, so cute. 341 00:15:08,500 --> 00:15:09,630 Cute, right? 342 00:15:09,709 --> 00:15:10,829 Very cute. 343 00:15:10,917 --> 00:15:13,167 And let's not forget, I'm a professional. 344 00:15:15,166 --> 00:15:16,416 I have to meet him. 345 00:15:16,500 --> 00:15:17,790 How am I gonna meet him? 346 00:15:17,875 --> 00:15:19,415 Sweetie, we got here ten minutes ago, 347 00:15:19,500 --> 00:15:20,580 pace yourself. 348 00:15:20,667 --> 00:15:21,997 Hey, beautiful. I'm J.J. 349 00:15:22,083 --> 00:15:24,083 Can I buy those sweet lips a drink? 350 00:15:24,166 --> 00:15:26,076 -Oh. -Um... 351 00:15:26,166 --> 00:15:28,626 I'm sorry, we were just leaving. 352 00:15:28,709 --> 00:15:30,289 [Carrie] Charlotte was a firm believer 353 00:15:30,375 --> 00:15:32,245 in the laws of dating feng shui. 354 00:15:32,333 --> 00:15:34,583 Change location, change luck. 355 00:15:34,667 --> 00:15:37,577 Why is it always a guy like that, is it me? 356 00:15:37,667 --> 00:15:39,037 No, sweetie, it's not you. 357 00:15:39,125 --> 00:15:41,285 Into every life, a little J.J. must fall. 358 00:15:41,375 --> 00:15:45,165 I just want a nice, sweet, handsome, funny, 359 00:15:45,250 --> 00:15:47,080 great guy who doesn't say things like, 360 00:15:47,166 --> 00:15:48,576 "Sweet lips." 361 00:15:48,667 --> 00:15:50,377 Is that too much to ask? 362 00:15:50,458 --> 00:15:51,998 Hey, hey! 363 00:15:52,083 --> 00:15:53,883 You didn't leave, you're just over here now. 364 00:15:53,959 --> 00:15:55,499 C'mon, let me buy you a drink. 365 00:15:55,583 --> 00:15:56,793 I'm really not interested. 366 00:15:56,875 --> 00:15:58,875 One drink, I'll even buy blondie here one. 367 00:15:58,959 --> 00:16:00,289 One little drinky. 368 00:16:00,375 --> 00:16:01,785 Excuse me, 369 00:16:02,083 --> 00:16:03,583 she said she's not interested. 370 00:16:03,667 --> 00:16:04,787 Am I talkin' to you? 371 00:16:04,875 --> 00:16:05,785 No. 372 00:16:05,875 --> 00:16:07,285 -Come on-- -You're not listening. 373 00:16:07,375 --> 00:16:08,285 The lady said-- 374 00:16:08,375 --> 00:16:09,705 Hey, fuck you. 375 00:16:10,583 --> 00:16:11,543 Oh! 376 00:16:13,542 --> 00:16:15,212 I'm sorry about that. 377 00:16:15,291 --> 00:16:16,711 Um... 378 00:16:16,792 --> 00:16:18,502 Did you hurt your hand? 379 00:16:18,583 --> 00:16:19,503 No. 380 00:16:19,583 --> 00:16:21,213 [Carrie] His name was Arthur. 381 00:16:21,291 --> 00:16:23,541 He was a nice, sweet, handsome, funny, 382 00:16:23,625 --> 00:16:25,035 great investment banker 383 00:16:25,125 --> 00:16:27,495 who lived between Madison and 5th. 384 00:16:27,583 --> 00:16:30,043 So, maybe there really were white knights. 385 00:16:30,125 --> 00:16:32,035 -[gasping] -[man] A little help... 386 00:16:34,792 --> 00:16:36,752 [Carrie] The day after Charlotte met her knight, 387 00:16:36,834 --> 00:16:38,464 I met my credit card limit. 388 00:16:38,542 --> 00:16:40,002 With no man in sight, 389 00:16:40,083 --> 00:16:43,333 I decided to rescue my ankles from a life of boredom 390 00:16:43,417 --> 00:16:46,917 by purchasing too many pairs of Jimmy Choo shoes. 391 00:16:47,458 --> 00:16:49,328 Hello. My name's Bill Kelley 392 00:16:49,417 --> 00:16:51,457 and I want to be your city comptroller. 393 00:16:51,542 --> 00:16:52,712 You're not seriously here. 394 00:16:52,792 --> 00:16:54,582 Oh yes, ma'am, I assure you, I am. 395 00:16:54,667 --> 00:16:57,327 And I brought along some voter registration forms. 396 00:16:57,417 --> 00:16:59,127 I took the liberty of filling out your name. 397 00:16:59,208 --> 00:17:01,328 Under "occupation" I put heartbreaker. 398 00:17:01,417 --> 00:17:02,917 I really did, look. 399 00:17:03,417 --> 00:17:06,127 You're like a Jehovah's Witness with a good suit. 400 00:17:07,041 --> 00:17:09,171 So how long you been sitting here? 401 00:17:09,250 --> 00:17:10,170 Your number's not listed. 402 00:17:10,250 --> 00:17:12,000 -Exactly. -What'd you buy? 403 00:17:12,083 --> 00:17:14,293 -Shoes. -Let me see. 404 00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:16,500 C'mon, sit down and show me. 405 00:17:16,583 --> 00:17:18,383 God, you are... 406 00:17:18,875 --> 00:17:20,125 I know. 407 00:17:23,125 --> 00:17:25,455 I'm not showing you a shoe. 408 00:17:26,125 --> 00:17:28,415 Ooh, sexy. 409 00:17:29,041 --> 00:17:30,381 Hey, I need a favor. 410 00:17:30,458 --> 00:17:31,628 Oh, you do? 411 00:17:31,709 --> 00:17:33,499 Actually, it's for The city of New York. 412 00:17:33,583 --> 00:17:35,583 See, I really am one of the good guys. 413 00:17:35,667 --> 00:17:37,287 And right now I'm carrying all the boroughs, 414 00:17:37,375 --> 00:17:39,035 but I still need help in Staten Island. 415 00:17:39,125 --> 00:17:41,325 -You want one? -No, I had one Thursday. 416 00:17:42,000 --> 00:17:43,960 So, here's the thing. 417 00:17:44,041 --> 00:17:45,541 I gotta go back out there 418 00:17:45,625 --> 00:17:48,375 to do a schmooze at the Capri Restaurant 419 00:17:48,458 --> 00:17:49,708 on Sunday night 420 00:17:49,792 --> 00:17:51,672 and I want you to go with me. 421 00:17:52,291 --> 00:17:53,751 And why is that? 422 00:17:53,834 --> 00:17:55,504 'Cause they have great Italian. 423 00:17:55,583 --> 00:17:58,793 And also, for the record... 424 00:18:00,417 --> 00:18:02,167 I can't stop thinking about you. 425 00:18:03,625 --> 00:18:05,325 So I'll pick you up at 7:00. 426 00:18:05,417 --> 00:18:07,827 -Um, no. -Don't answer now. 427 00:18:07,917 --> 00:18:09,287 -I just did. -Think about it. 428 00:18:09,375 --> 00:18:11,915 I'll drive by at 7:00, I'll wait down in the car. 429 00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:13,750 You come down, you come. 430 00:18:13,834 --> 00:18:16,634 You don't, no pressure, wear the shoes. 431 00:18:17,500 --> 00:18:19,630 Oh, keep these. 432 00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:21,330 Pass them out. 433 00:18:22,583 --> 00:18:24,213 [Carrie] That Saturday, when I was unable 434 00:18:24,291 --> 00:18:26,041 to take Miranda to her laser surgery 435 00:18:26,125 --> 00:18:28,375 due to a looming column deadline, 436 00:18:28,458 --> 00:18:29,958 she didn't call Steve. 437 00:18:30,041 --> 00:18:32,751 She decided to take things into her own hands. 438 00:18:32,834 --> 00:18:34,754 Who needs a man to hold your hand 439 00:18:34,834 --> 00:18:37,334 when you have cab fare and a big black marker 440 00:18:37,417 --> 00:18:39,667 to write down emergency numbers. 441 00:18:39,750 --> 00:18:41,750 And while Miranda was under the knife, 442 00:18:41,834 --> 00:18:44,544 Charlotte was having her first glass of white wine 443 00:18:44,625 --> 00:18:45,875 with her white knight. 444 00:18:45,959 --> 00:18:48,039 So I did the Hasty Pudding show a couple times 445 00:18:48,125 --> 00:18:49,455 just to blow off steam. 446 00:18:49,542 --> 00:18:51,172 My friend Tom says that Harvard is still 447 00:18:51,250 --> 00:18:53,920 the most massively aggressive place he's ever seen. 448 00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:55,330 And he's a trader. 449 00:18:55,417 --> 00:18:56,327 Not Tom Kennedy. 450 00:18:56,417 --> 00:18:58,377 Oh my God, yes! Do you know Tom? 451 00:18:58,458 --> 00:19:00,328 Great guy. And how about his wife? 452 00:19:00,417 --> 00:19:03,537 Now that's my idea of the perfect marriage. 453 00:19:03,625 --> 00:19:04,745 Totally. 454 00:19:04,834 --> 00:19:06,254 [Carrie] Charlotte nodded, thinking, 455 00:19:06,333 --> 00:19:08,253 "What a nice, sweet, Handsome, funny, 456 00:19:08,333 --> 00:19:09,833 great couple they made." 457 00:19:09,917 --> 00:19:13,247 Excuse me, you just bumped into her chair. 458 00:19:13,333 --> 00:19:14,543 A little crowded. 459 00:19:14,625 --> 00:19:16,415 Yes, it's crowded, but you bumped her chair, 460 00:19:16,500 --> 00:19:17,580 spilled her wine. 461 00:19:17,667 --> 00:19:19,127 You should say you're sorry. 462 00:19:19,208 --> 00:19:20,128 It's okay. 463 00:19:20,208 --> 00:19:21,578 No, it's not okay. 464 00:19:22,375 --> 00:19:23,955 That's no way to treat a lady. 465 00:19:24,041 --> 00:19:26,711 Lighten up, it's brunch. 466 00:19:32,917 --> 00:19:34,537 [Carrie] Charlotte suddenly realized 467 00:19:34,625 --> 00:19:37,915 that her date wasn't a man who came to a woman's rescue. 468 00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:40,130 He was a man who liked to start fights. 469 00:19:40,208 --> 00:19:42,078 -Excuse me, sir. -You want a piece of me? 470 00:19:42,166 --> 00:19:43,666 -[waitress screams] -[man grunts] 471 00:19:43,750 --> 00:19:45,170 [Carrie] And just like that, 472 00:19:45,250 --> 00:19:49,170 Charlotte's white knight changed into a white nightmare. 473 00:19:49,250 --> 00:19:50,670 [knocking] 474 00:19:50,750 --> 00:19:53,080 [nurse] Miss Hobbes, Your friend is here. 475 00:19:54,417 --> 00:19:55,667 Carrie? 476 00:19:55,750 --> 00:19:57,210 [Steve] Actually no, it's me. 477 00:19:57,291 --> 00:19:59,921 Carrie thought you might need a little help, is that okay? 478 00:20:00,291 --> 00:20:03,251 I'm on Valium, everything's okay. 479 00:20:04,083 --> 00:20:05,833 Here, give me your hand. 480 00:20:05,917 --> 00:20:07,127 I'm good. 481 00:20:08,709 --> 00:20:10,919 Just don't let me hit the door frame 482 00:20:11,000 --> 00:20:13,420 and never mention these goggles. 483 00:20:15,834 --> 00:20:19,004 [Carrie] One cab ride and two potent sleeping pills later, 484 00:20:19,083 --> 00:20:20,543 Steve put Miranda to bed. 485 00:20:20,625 --> 00:20:23,285 Alright, okay, no, give me your leg. 486 00:20:23,375 --> 00:20:24,575 No-- Yeah, this leg. 487 00:20:24,667 --> 00:20:26,747 No, I want this leg. Give me-- 488 00:20:26,834 --> 00:20:29,214 Stop! No, no rescue. 489 00:20:29,291 --> 00:20:30,711 Alright, fine, okay. 490 00:20:30,792 --> 00:20:33,922 Alright, put your feet under here, sleeping beauty. 491 00:20:36,333 --> 00:20:38,083 [Miranda groaning] 492 00:20:38,166 --> 00:20:40,746 [Carrie] The next morning, after what felt like she'd slept 493 00:20:40,834 --> 00:20:42,214 for a hundred years, 494 00:20:42,291 --> 00:20:44,291 Miranda awoke. 495 00:20:52,667 --> 00:20:54,787 And for the first time in her life, 496 00:20:54,875 --> 00:20:56,955 saw things clearly. 497 00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:13,750 That night, Mr. July invited Samantha to come down 498 00:21:13,834 --> 00:21:17,504 and hang with him while he worked the Sunday shift. 499 00:21:18,500 --> 00:21:20,040 Hello! 500 00:21:20,125 --> 00:21:22,325 Where is everyone? 501 00:21:22,417 --> 00:21:24,247 [Carrie] The idea of spending time in a firehouse 502 00:21:24,333 --> 00:21:27,043 filled with a veritable calendar year of hot firemen 503 00:21:27,125 --> 00:21:28,665 was a fantasy, Samantha felt, 504 00:21:28,750 --> 00:21:30,920 whose time had most definitely come. 505 00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:32,040 Boys. 506 00:21:32,583 --> 00:21:34,923 [sports game chatter on TV] 507 00:21:39,208 --> 00:21:41,378 [Carrie] This was not the firehouse fantasy 508 00:21:41,458 --> 00:21:43,078 Samantha had in mind. 509 00:21:43,166 --> 00:21:45,166 [chatter on TV continues] 510 00:21:45,250 --> 00:21:47,040 [firemen cheering] 511 00:21:48,250 --> 00:21:50,080 -Hey, Samantha. -[Samantha giggles nervously] 512 00:21:50,166 --> 00:21:52,786 I just put a pot of chili on, c'mon, c'mon, sit down. 513 00:21:52,875 --> 00:21:55,285 C'mon, brother, get up, make room for Sam. 514 00:21:55,375 --> 00:21:57,575 [chatter on TV continues] 515 00:21:58,041 --> 00:21:59,711 I'll be right back. 516 00:21:59,792 --> 00:22:01,542 [Carrie] Samantha's rescue fantasy 517 00:22:01,625 --> 00:22:04,785 was suddenly something she needed to be rescued from. 518 00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:07,290 [chatter on TV continues] 519 00:22:07,375 --> 00:22:09,075 [phone ringing] 520 00:22:09,166 --> 00:22:11,036 [Carrie] It's me, leave a message. 521 00:22:11,125 --> 00:22:12,785 [Bill] Hey... 522 00:22:12,875 --> 00:22:15,245 I'm still down here in the car. 523 00:22:16,583 --> 00:22:20,043 Alright, I'll wait ten more seconds and then I'll go alone. 524 00:22:20,125 --> 00:22:24,875 Ten, nine, eight, seven, 525 00:22:24,959 --> 00:22:28,079 six, poor me, 526 00:22:28,166 --> 00:22:33,456 five, four, three, two... 527 00:22:34,709 --> 00:22:35,959 one, 528 00:22:36,041 --> 00:22:37,921 one and a half. 529 00:22:38,000 --> 00:22:40,380 Sometimes a girl needs a half. 530 00:22:41,750 --> 00:22:43,540 Okay, that was my best shot. 531 00:22:44,417 --> 00:22:45,787 You're not coming. 532 00:22:46,583 --> 00:22:48,003 So long... 533 00:22:48,083 --> 00:22:49,583 Vote! 534 00:23:04,375 --> 00:23:06,035 I don't know what I'm doing. 535 00:23:06,125 --> 00:23:07,245 Okay. 536 00:23:07,333 --> 00:23:09,583 [Carrie] I'm standing here, fully dressed, 537 00:23:09,875 --> 00:23:12,875 watching that politician guy 538 00:23:12,959 --> 00:23:15,879 drive off to Staten Island without me, why? 539 00:23:15,959 --> 00:23:17,249 You hate Staten Island? 540 00:23:17,333 --> 00:23:20,003 No, don't think so, any other ideas? 541 00:23:23,667 --> 00:23:25,127 Just say it. 542 00:23:25,834 --> 00:23:27,004 Big. 543 00:23:27,083 --> 00:23:28,883 You're terrified of getting hurt again. 544 00:23:28,959 --> 00:23:31,039 [Carrie] There it was, the phrase single, 545 00:23:31,125 --> 00:23:32,575 independent women in their 30's 546 00:23:32,667 --> 00:23:35,537 are never supposed to think, let alone say out loud. 547 00:23:35,625 --> 00:23:37,785 -Yep, okay, gotta go. -[phone beeps] 548 00:23:39,458 --> 00:23:40,668 Miranda was right. 549 00:23:40,750 --> 00:23:42,500 I was like a woman frozen on the ledge 550 00:23:42,583 --> 00:23:44,133 of a building on fire. 551 00:23:44,208 --> 00:23:46,628 I'd been so burned in my last relationship, 552 00:23:46,709 --> 00:23:49,829 I was afraid to leap off into the next one. 553 00:23:49,917 --> 00:23:52,127 [ferry horn blows] 554 00:24:05,709 --> 00:24:07,459 Excuse me for a second. 555 00:24:08,166 --> 00:24:09,166 Hey. 556 00:24:09,250 --> 00:24:10,880 Hi, how'd you get here? 557 00:24:10,959 --> 00:24:12,169 Ferry. 558 00:24:12,250 --> 00:24:13,210 All alone? 559 00:24:13,291 --> 00:24:14,831 I'm very independent. 560 00:24:14,917 --> 00:24:16,207 I can see that. 561 00:24:16,291 --> 00:24:18,881 And... this isn't a date. 562 00:24:19,625 --> 00:24:21,285 I'm here as a concerned citizen. 563 00:24:21,375 --> 00:24:22,575 There's a woman on my block 564 00:24:22,667 --> 00:24:24,127 who will not pick up after her poodle. 565 00:24:24,208 --> 00:24:25,748 I'll see what I can do. 566 00:24:26,041 --> 00:24:27,671 Can I take your coat? 567 00:24:29,208 --> 00:24:31,538 And, Mr. President... 568 00:24:33,000 --> 00:24:34,750 It was a bad break-up... 569 00:24:34,834 --> 00:24:37,544 So I need to take this slow. 570 00:24:42,542 --> 00:24:44,832 Somewhere between The chili and halftime, 571 00:24:44,917 --> 00:24:48,287 Samantha decided if she wanted her firehouse fantasy to happen, 572 00:24:48,375 --> 00:24:50,285 she'd have to make it happen. 573 00:24:50,375 --> 00:24:52,035 [Samantha] Up here! 574 00:24:57,041 --> 00:24:59,961 Nice pole, wanna see it again? 575 00:25:00,041 --> 00:25:01,211 Oh, yeah. 576 00:25:03,375 --> 00:25:05,035 [moaning] 577 00:25:05,125 --> 00:25:08,245 [Carrie] Samantha rode the pole a couple of times that night. 578 00:25:08,667 --> 00:25:10,537 [moaning continues] 579 00:25:13,208 --> 00:25:16,168 [Samantha] Why are these boots set up like this, huh? 580 00:25:16,250 --> 00:25:18,330 [Ricky] You have to be ready at a moment's notice. 581 00:25:18,417 --> 00:25:20,957 [Samantha] Oh, well I should be a fireman, 582 00:25:21,041 --> 00:25:24,291 because I'm always ready to go. 583 00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:27,330 [fire alarm blaring] 584 00:25:27,417 --> 00:25:29,287 [Ricky] We got a job! 585 00:25:31,875 --> 00:25:33,165 -Get out of my gear. -Hmm? 586 00:25:33,250 --> 00:25:35,630 Get the fuck out of my fucking gear! 587 00:25:35,709 --> 00:25:39,039 Let's go, move lady, there's a fucking fire! 588 00:25:43,417 --> 00:25:45,327 I'm coming. 589 00:25:47,458 --> 00:25:49,328 [truck siren wailing] 590 00:25:58,667 --> 00:26:00,627 [Carrie] Samantha learned there was quite a difference 591 00:26:00,709 --> 00:26:04,669 between a rescue fantasy and a rescue reality. 592 00:26:05,291 --> 00:26:07,631 [couple chuckling] 593 00:26:09,000 --> 00:26:10,540 It's getting late, you think, uh-- 594 00:26:10,625 --> 00:26:12,075 Sure I can't give you a ride? 595 00:26:12,166 --> 00:26:13,786 No, no. 596 00:26:14,250 --> 00:26:15,750 I'm good. 597 00:26:16,041 --> 00:26:17,421 You go... 598 00:26:18,291 --> 00:26:20,041 You go do your thing. 599 00:26:20,125 --> 00:26:21,995 Hey, do I get your vote? 600 00:26:28,750 --> 00:26:30,130 Too fast? 601 00:26:33,250 --> 00:26:36,040 Oh, my God, you're so sexy, come home with me. 602 00:26:36,333 --> 00:26:38,293 No, no, kissing is enough. 603 00:26:38,375 --> 00:26:40,825 It's enough for tonight, really. 604 00:26:44,041 --> 00:26:45,131 Oh! 605 00:26:51,333 --> 00:26:54,833 Oh, shit, it's almost 12:00. I'm gonna miss the last ferry. 606 00:27:06,875 --> 00:27:08,415 [bell tolling] 607 00:27:08,500 --> 00:27:10,290 Oh, wait! 608 00:27:10,375 --> 00:27:11,285 Oh! 609 00:27:11,375 --> 00:27:13,165 [ferry horn blaring] 610 00:27:13,959 --> 00:27:15,539 Wait! 611 00:27:18,083 --> 00:27:20,883 I lost my Choo! 612 00:27:22,083 --> 00:27:23,293 Shit. 613 00:27:23,375 --> 00:27:25,495 [horn continues blaring] 614 00:27:32,125 --> 00:27:33,325 [car honking] 615 00:27:39,041 --> 00:27:40,421 Need a ride? 616 00:27:43,333 --> 00:27:45,963 [Carrie] Well, he didn't have a white horse, 617 00:27:46,041 --> 00:27:49,631 but he did have a BMW with a working heater. 618 00:27:49,709 --> 00:27:53,749 So I guess sometimes a woman absolutely has to be rescued. 619 00:27:54,208 --> 00:27:56,498 You're taking me to my apartment and that's it. 620 00:27:56,583 --> 00:27:57,793 That's it... 621 00:27:58,041 --> 00:27:59,291 for tonight. 622 00:28:03,250 --> 00:28:06,920 Now, do you have any idea how we get the fuck off this island? 623 00:28:07,875 --> 00:28:09,495 Um, okay, make a right. 624 00:28:09,583 --> 00:28:14,003 And sometimes a woman absolutely has to rescue a man. 625 00:28:14,083 --> 00:28:15,503 At least that's how it ends 626 00:28:15,583 --> 00:28:18,293 in this Staten Island ferry tale.