1
00:00:57,834 --> 00:00:59,964
[Miranda]
Okay, I gotta go.
2
00:01:00,041 --> 00:01:01,961
Goodbye, have a good day.
3
00:01:02,041 --> 00:01:03,291
Give me a kiss.
4
00:01:03,875 --> 00:01:05,665
[whispering]
Bye, bye.
5
00:01:05,750 --> 00:01:08,750
[Carrie]
One of the unfortunate things
about ending a relationship
6
00:01:08,834 --> 00:01:11,134
in an expensive city
like New York is...
7
00:01:11,208 --> 00:01:14,498
While you can emotionally
move away from each other,
8
00:01:14,583 --> 00:01:16,503
you physically can't.
9
00:01:17,291 --> 00:01:19,291
Shh. Shh.
10
00:01:19,959 --> 00:01:21,539
[whimpering]
11
00:01:21,625 --> 00:01:22,995
Shh, shh.
12
00:01:23,083 --> 00:01:24,963
[barking]
13
00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:28,580
Hey,
going to work?
14
00:01:28,667 --> 00:01:30,167
Yeah, work.
15
00:01:30,250 --> 00:01:31,960
Sorry about
waking you.
16
00:01:32,500 --> 00:01:33,630
What time is it?
17
00:01:33,709 --> 00:01:35,079
6:30.
18
00:01:35,166 --> 00:01:37,126
Jesus, why so early?
19
00:01:37,208 --> 00:01:39,248
I got a brief due, so...
20
00:01:39,333 --> 00:01:41,253
[Carrie] There was nothing
brief about it,
21
00:01:41,333 --> 00:01:43,083
Steve and Miranda
had been doing the polite,
22
00:01:43,166 --> 00:01:44,706
"avoid each other
break-up dance"
23
00:01:44,792 --> 00:01:46,502
for about three weeks.
24
00:01:47,208 --> 00:01:48,168
Hey.
25
00:01:48,667 --> 00:01:51,787
I'm sorry it's taking me
so long to find a place...
26
00:01:52,333 --> 00:01:53,793
I got a lead
on one though.
27
00:01:53,875 --> 00:01:55,375
Okay.
28
00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:57,500
Hey, do you--
29
00:01:58,959 --> 00:02:00,169
Never mind.
30
00:02:00,250 --> 00:02:01,580
What?
31
00:02:01,667 --> 00:02:03,917
I was gonna ask if you want to
go and look at it with me,
32
00:02:04,000 --> 00:02:05,170
but that's...
33
00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:07,000
That's weird, right?
34
00:02:07,083 --> 00:02:08,543
I don't know.
35
00:02:08,625 --> 00:02:10,165
I guess we
could do that.
36
00:02:10,250 --> 00:02:11,330
Yeah?
37
00:02:15,375 --> 00:02:18,285
[Carrie] And when you finally do
find that place to move,
38
00:02:18,375 --> 00:02:20,125
you need to fill it
with furniture.
39
00:02:20,208 --> 00:02:22,458
That's why so many smart
New Yorkers frequent
40
00:02:22,542 --> 00:02:25,502
the opening day of
the new designers showcase.
41
00:02:26,709 --> 00:02:29,879
Hey.
I'm like your roadie.
42
00:02:29,959 --> 00:02:31,539
Oh, I don't
have a road...
43
00:02:31,625 --> 00:02:32,875
I just have
this booth.
44
00:02:32,959 --> 00:02:34,959
So, at best,
you're my booth bitch.
45
00:02:35,041 --> 00:02:37,331
Yeah, I'm your
booth bitch.
46
00:02:37,417 --> 00:02:38,787
Meow.
47
00:02:38,875 --> 00:02:39,955
I wax your wood.
48
00:02:40,041 --> 00:02:42,251
You wax it real good.
49
00:02:42,875 --> 00:02:44,995
That's 'cause
I'm your booth bitch.
50
00:02:48,750 --> 00:02:49,830
You watch the booth.
51
00:02:49,917 --> 00:02:52,077
I'm gonna go get
us some coffee.
52
00:02:52,750 --> 00:02:54,540
Whatever you say...
53
00:02:54,625 --> 00:02:56,375
I'm your booth bitch.
54
00:02:56,458 --> 00:02:57,668
Oh, that's sexy.
55
00:02:57,750 --> 00:02:58,790
And I like it.
56
00:02:58,875 --> 00:03:00,745
[chuckles]
57
00:03:00,834 --> 00:03:03,424
[Carrie] I didn't need to wait
for a blue ribbon panel
to decide.
58
00:03:03,500 --> 00:03:08,210
He was the finest new designer
in the whole damn place.
59
00:03:15,083 --> 00:03:18,583
I had often fantasized about
running into my ex and his wife,
60
00:03:18,667 --> 00:03:19,917
but in those fantasies...
61
00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:22,130
I was running into them
with a truck.
62
00:03:22,208 --> 00:03:24,668
I don't know how you could
like this clunky wood.
63
00:03:24,750 --> 00:03:26,750
It's almost oppressive.
64
00:03:31,625 --> 00:03:33,075
What the fuck?
65
00:03:33,166 --> 00:03:35,286
Hey, hi.
66
00:03:36,041 --> 00:03:37,331
Hi.
67
00:03:37,583 --> 00:03:38,963
I'm working here.
68
00:03:39,041 --> 00:03:40,831
Well, I mean,
I'm not working...
69
00:03:40,917 --> 00:03:43,167
Just, this is
my boyfriend's booth.
70
00:03:44,125 --> 00:03:45,875
I'm his booth bitch.
71
00:03:45,959 --> 00:03:47,539
That's a joke.
72
00:03:47,625 --> 00:03:50,125
I guess it's
an "in" joke.
73
00:03:50,208 --> 00:03:51,378
I get it.
74
00:03:51,458 --> 00:03:55,788
So, can I, um, show you
something in a hutch?
75
00:03:56,625 --> 00:03:59,995
His pieces are fantastic,
it's just not really our style.
76
00:04:00,458 --> 00:04:01,878
-Oh.
-[Big] Yeah, we only like
77
00:04:01,959 --> 00:04:04,169
teeny tiny furniture.
78
00:04:06,959 --> 00:04:07,879
Hey.
79
00:04:07,959 --> 00:04:10,169
Oh, hey, hey.
80
00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:12,000
Hey, oh--
81
00:04:12,083 --> 00:04:13,753
Hey, this is, um,
82
00:04:13,834 --> 00:04:16,174
this is the designer,
this is Aidan Shaw.
83
00:04:16,250 --> 00:04:18,580
Hey, great stuff.
84
00:04:18,667 --> 00:04:20,287
Aw, thanks, man.
85
00:04:21,583 --> 00:04:23,543
-Oak?
-Actually, it's mostly maple.
86
00:04:23,625 --> 00:04:27,915
[Carrie] There we were,
mostly maple and
incredibly uncomfortable.
87
00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:29,790
Sorry, I didn't
get your names.
88
00:04:29,875 --> 00:04:31,745
Oh!
I'm sorry.
89
00:04:31,834 --> 00:04:34,134
These are--
are my friends.
90
00:04:34,208 --> 00:04:36,878
This is, uh,
Natasha and this is--
91
00:04:36,959 --> 00:04:38,079
Oh, oh!
92
00:04:38,166 --> 00:04:39,416
Oh, shit!
93
00:04:39,500 --> 00:04:41,210
Oh, my God, I'm sorry.
Is that hot?
94
00:04:41,291 --> 00:04:43,671
-Well, it ain't cold.
-God...
95
00:04:43,750 --> 00:04:44,960
-Here.
-No, I'll, I'll--
96
00:04:45,041 --> 00:04:46,001
Sure.
97
00:04:46,375 --> 00:04:48,165
We should put some
cold water on this.
98
00:04:48,834 --> 00:04:50,464
It was nice
meeting you.
99
00:04:51,792 --> 00:04:53,542
Thanks for the coffee.
100
00:04:55,375 --> 00:04:56,245
They seem nice.
101
00:04:56,333 --> 00:04:57,423
Yeah, don't they?
102
00:04:58,041 --> 00:04:59,331
Where do you
know them from?
103
00:04:59,417 --> 00:05:00,627
Oh...
104
00:05:00,709 --> 00:05:02,379
You know, from around.
105
00:05:03,208 --> 00:05:05,248
Like 100 years ago...
106
00:05:06,250 --> 00:05:07,540
It's a past life.
107
00:05:11,667 --> 00:05:15,537
Two hours later, it was time
for the opening day party.
108
00:05:15,625 --> 00:05:17,035
It was lovely.
109
00:05:17,125 --> 00:05:19,205
Caviar, silent auctions,
110
00:05:19,291 --> 00:05:20,791
and landmines.
111
00:05:20,875 --> 00:05:22,325
Where's Paul Bunyan?
112
00:05:22,917 --> 00:05:25,877
If you're referring
to my boyfriend...
113
00:05:25,959 --> 00:05:27,749
he's doing business.
114
00:05:27,834 --> 00:05:29,634
Ooh, he's a big 'un.
115
00:05:29,709 --> 00:05:31,959
Where'd he learn to
whittle like that?
116
00:05:32,041 --> 00:05:34,131
How many drinks
have you had?
117
00:05:34,208 --> 00:05:36,128
Not nearly enough.
118
00:05:45,083 --> 00:05:46,423
So...
119
00:05:46,917 --> 00:05:48,327
How are you?
120
00:05:48,417 --> 00:05:49,917
I'm great.
121
00:05:50,333 --> 00:05:53,083
And Daniel Boone,
is he a nice guy?
122
00:05:53,709 --> 00:05:55,629
His name is Aidan.
123
00:05:57,083 --> 00:05:59,383
Where's your
sense of humor?
124
00:05:59,458 --> 00:06:00,748
Where's your wife?
125
00:06:00,834 --> 00:06:03,134
Guarding her bid on
the silent auction.
126
00:06:03,208 --> 00:06:05,498
She's got her eye
on a beige chair.
127
00:06:05,583 --> 00:06:08,713
Everything in my apartment
is now beige.
128
00:06:08,917 --> 00:06:10,207
Beige...
129
00:06:10,291 --> 00:06:11,461
is bullshit.
130
00:06:11,542 --> 00:06:13,712
I thought you
wanted beige.
131
00:06:13,792 --> 00:06:14,792
Yeah, well...
132
00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:16,285
it doesn't quite...
133
00:06:17,333 --> 00:06:18,383
fit.
134
00:06:18,458 --> 00:06:19,788
Have you got a smoke?
135
00:06:20,208 --> 00:06:21,378
I quit.
136
00:06:21,458 --> 00:06:23,668
We always used to share
a cigarette together.
137
00:06:23,750 --> 00:06:26,830
We did a lot of things that
were bad for me together.
138
00:06:27,625 --> 00:06:29,825
I have a secret
to tell you.
139
00:06:32,583 --> 00:06:34,753
It's not working.
140
00:06:35,625 --> 00:06:37,955
I'm getting out.
141
00:06:39,125 --> 00:06:41,125
If you know anyone
who's interested.
142
00:06:41,458 --> 00:06:43,578
You should really
keep that to yourself.
143
00:06:43,667 --> 00:06:46,787
No one is interested
in that information.
144
00:06:55,458 --> 00:06:56,328
Big's leaving his wife!
145
00:06:56,417 --> 00:06:57,707
-Oh, my God!
-No!
146
00:06:57,792 --> 00:06:59,582
He got drunk and told me
at the furniture show.
147
00:06:59,667 --> 00:07:01,127
What was he doing at
the furniture show?
148
00:07:01,208 --> 00:07:02,418
Drinking and leaving
his wife.
149
00:07:02,500 --> 00:07:03,540
Oh, my God!
150
00:07:03,625 --> 00:07:05,245
Well, let's just
say it, you won.
151
00:07:05,333 --> 00:07:06,253
Was there a contest?
152
00:07:06,333 --> 00:07:07,383
Oh, please...
153
00:07:07,458 --> 00:07:08,708
There's always a contest
with an ex.
154
00:07:08,792 --> 00:07:10,462
It's called,
"Who'll die miserable?"
155
00:07:10,542 --> 00:07:11,462
What did he say?
156
00:07:11,542 --> 00:07:13,292
He said,
"It's not working out."
157
00:07:13,375 --> 00:07:15,915
And then he leaned in
and said,
158
00:07:16,000 --> 00:07:18,130
"If you know anyone
who's interested."
159
00:07:18,208 --> 00:07:19,328
[gasps]
160
00:07:19,417 --> 00:07:21,377
Well, you don't know
anyone who's interested.
161
00:07:21,458 --> 00:07:23,248
He's married, Carrie.
Carrie, he's married.
162
00:07:23,333 --> 00:07:24,883
Charlotte, I think
I'm aware of that fact.
163
00:07:24,959 --> 00:07:26,249
Why is he telling you?
164
00:07:26,333 --> 00:07:28,633
I don't know,
to save postage
on his newsletter?
165
00:07:28,709 --> 00:07:30,499
-What are you gonna do?
-I'm not gonna do anything.
166
00:07:30,583 --> 00:07:32,293
She's not gonna
do anything.
167
00:07:32,375 --> 00:07:34,325
Okay, you need to take
a big breath 'cause
you're starting to bug me.
168
00:07:34,417 --> 00:07:35,707
How dare he say
that to you.
169
00:07:35,792 --> 00:07:37,502
Married men never
leave their wives.
170
00:07:37,583 --> 00:07:39,883
Even if he did, I have no
intention of doing anything
171
00:07:39,959 --> 00:07:42,209
for two reasons.
First, I have a great boyfriend
172
00:07:42,291 --> 00:07:44,421
and second,
I'm not insane.
173
00:07:44,709 --> 00:07:46,079
So, let's order.
174
00:07:46,375 --> 00:07:47,745
What do winners order?
175
00:07:47,834 --> 00:07:49,504
Didn't you feel
like punching him?
176
00:07:49,583 --> 00:07:52,463
No, it was too sad
or something.
177
00:07:52,542 --> 00:07:54,002
I would have
punched him.
178
00:07:54,375 --> 00:07:55,995
No, it is sad.
179
00:07:56,083 --> 00:07:58,583
How long has he been married?
What, seven months?
180
00:07:58,667 --> 00:08:00,327
Hmm. The seven month itch.
181
00:08:00,417 --> 00:08:02,287
Well, that's what happens
when people jump
182
00:08:02,375 --> 00:08:04,415
into relationships
too quickly.
183
00:08:05,792 --> 00:08:07,332
I resent that.
184
00:08:07,750 --> 00:08:09,960
Trey and I are nothing
like Big and Natasha.
185
00:08:10,041 --> 00:08:12,081
Don't listen to her,
she's mid-breakup.
186
00:08:12,166 --> 00:08:13,376
Thanks for the update.
187
00:08:13,458 --> 00:08:14,458
We're not like Big.
188
00:08:14,542 --> 00:08:15,962
Trey and I really
love each other.
189
00:08:16,041 --> 00:08:17,211
Who wants to
split a Reuben?
190
00:08:17,291 --> 00:08:20,831
In fact, I'm meeting
his mother this week
191
00:08:20,917 --> 00:08:23,327
and if all goes well...
192
00:08:23,417 --> 00:08:24,667
If all goes well, what?
193
00:08:24,750 --> 00:08:27,000
Trey is this close
to proposing.
194
00:08:27,083 --> 00:08:29,293
-I can feel it.
-Oh, my God, really?
195
00:08:29,375 --> 00:08:31,995
You just met. I've had pairs
of pantyhose longer.
196
00:08:32,083 --> 00:08:35,333
Miranda, it's not logical,
this is love.
197
00:08:35,417 --> 00:08:37,377
It's not logical,
it's right.
198
00:08:37,458 --> 00:08:39,498
In my heart,
I feel it's right.
199
00:08:39,583 --> 00:08:41,883
Okay, whatever.
200
00:08:45,250 --> 00:08:46,580
So...
201
00:08:46,917 --> 00:08:48,287
How did he look?
202
00:08:56,166 --> 00:08:57,376
Okay...
203
00:08:57,458 --> 00:08:59,168
I'll take it.
204
00:08:59,250 --> 00:09:01,670
[Carrie]
As Miranda looked around
the basement apartment,
205
00:09:01,750 --> 00:09:03,540
she realized
the contest was over.
206
00:09:03,625 --> 00:09:06,995
Steve was the ex that was going
to die alone and miserable.
207
00:09:07,208 --> 00:09:08,578
You can't live here.
208
00:09:09,125 --> 00:09:10,205
Wha...
209
00:09:10,291 --> 00:09:11,711
It's not that bad.
210
00:09:11,792 --> 00:09:12,792
It's not that bad?
211
00:09:12,875 --> 00:09:14,625
It's the doorway
to hell.
212
00:09:14,959 --> 00:09:16,169
There's got to be
a better place.
213
00:09:16,250 --> 00:09:17,630
I'll help you look.
214
00:09:18,333 --> 00:09:19,673
Guilt?
215
00:09:20,125 --> 00:09:21,495
Probably.
216
00:09:21,583 --> 00:09:23,633
I mean,
I broke up with him.
217
00:09:23,709 --> 00:09:26,709
And he's got no money,
no savings, no nothing.
218
00:09:27,083 --> 00:09:30,043
There should be some sort of
city funded break-up housing
219
00:09:30,125 --> 00:09:31,955
for those who find
themselves in need.
220
00:09:32,041 --> 00:09:33,171
Really.
221
00:09:33,250 --> 00:09:35,380
Like a big orphanage
filled with white beds
222
00:09:35,458 --> 00:09:37,998
where old boyfriends could
think about what they did wrong
223
00:09:38,083 --> 00:09:41,793
and cry themselves to sleep
in a clean, safe environment.
224
00:09:43,750 --> 00:09:46,500
You think maybe you don't
really want him to move away?
225
00:09:46,583 --> 00:09:48,383
No, it's not
that simple.
226
00:09:48,458 --> 00:09:50,418
My head tells me
it's time for him to leave,
227
00:09:50,500 --> 00:09:53,250
but the idea of him moving
to a basement apartment
228
00:09:53,333 --> 00:09:55,463
on the corner of "Depressing
and West Shit Street"
229
00:09:55,542 --> 00:09:57,582
breaks my heart.
230
00:09:57,667 --> 00:10:00,077
[Carrie] It's a pretty common
belief that women tend to use
231
00:10:00,166 --> 00:10:02,576
the left, more emotional
side of their brain,
232
00:10:02,667 --> 00:10:05,667
and men, the right,
more logical side.
233
00:10:05,750 --> 00:10:07,920
But is it really
that cut and dry?
234
00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:10,170
It seems that when it comes
to affairs of the heart,
235
00:10:10,250 --> 00:10:13,420
there's a battle between what
we know and what we feel.
236
00:10:13,500 --> 00:10:16,040
So, what do you do when
you find yourself in a situation
237
00:10:16,125 --> 00:10:17,285
that leaps back and forth
238
00:10:17,375 --> 00:10:18,825
between the left
and the right side?
239
00:10:18,917 --> 00:10:20,917
When it comes
to relationships,
240
00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:23,880
is it smarter to follow
your heart or your head?
241
00:10:24,458 --> 00:10:27,538
This is Trey, the summer he
graduated from medical school.
242
00:10:27,625 --> 00:10:30,125
[Carrie]
Later that week, Charlotte
met the head and heart
243
00:10:30,208 --> 00:10:31,208
of Trey's family.
244
00:10:31,291 --> 00:10:32,711
His mother,
Bunny MacDougal.
245
00:10:32,792 --> 00:10:35,832
Trey, you look so cute
in a cap and gown!
246
00:10:35,917 --> 00:10:37,747
[Trey] That's just before
we jumped in the fountain
247
00:10:37,834 --> 00:10:39,674
and all hell broke loose.
248
00:10:40,542 --> 00:10:41,792
Mother, what's next?
249
00:10:41,875 --> 00:10:43,205
Boy scout snaps?
250
00:10:43,291 --> 00:10:44,791
Count your blessings
I didn't bring the one
251
00:10:44,875 --> 00:10:46,375
on the bearskin rug.
252
00:10:46,458 --> 00:10:48,288
You'll have to
excuse her, Charlotte.
253
00:10:48,375 --> 00:10:50,245
She's a bit of
a camera Nazi.
254
00:10:50,333 --> 00:10:53,043
Well, if you insist on
dragging us down memory lane...
255
00:10:53,125 --> 00:10:54,575
I'm getting a real drink.
256
00:10:54,667 --> 00:10:55,707
Excuse me.
257
00:10:55,792 --> 00:10:57,632
-Glenlivit, rocks, please.
-Yes, sir.
258
00:10:57,709 --> 00:11:00,629
Maybe you should
have a red wine instead.
259
00:11:00,709 --> 00:11:01,999
Better for the heart.
260
00:11:02,792 --> 00:11:03,752
Alrighty.
261
00:11:03,834 --> 00:11:05,964
-[Thomas] Red wine.
-Oh, Thomas,
262
00:11:06,041 --> 00:11:08,671
we'd love some more of
these nibbly cheese things.
263
00:11:08,750 --> 00:11:10,500
-[Thomas] Very good, ma'am.
-Thank you.
264
00:11:10,959 --> 00:11:14,919
He's older than water,
but never forgets a martini.
265
00:11:17,166 --> 00:11:17,996
So...
266
00:11:18,083 --> 00:11:19,583
Do you play tennis?
267
00:11:19,667 --> 00:11:20,877
Mm-hmm.
268
00:11:21,083 --> 00:11:22,383
I like her.
269
00:11:22,458 --> 00:11:23,958
Join the club.
270
00:11:24,583 --> 00:11:26,883
What are you two
lovebirds doing tonight?
271
00:11:27,583 --> 00:11:29,673
We've got dinner
reservations at Cloche.
272
00:11:29,750 --> 00:11:31,330
I was there last week.
273
00:11:31,417 --> 00:11:34,917
Disappointing crab
and the host was rude.
274
00:11:36,458 --> 00:11:40,078
Maybe you should go
to Cotes Basque instead.
275
00:11:40,583 --> 00:11:42,083
Alrighty.
276
00:11:42,166 --> 00:11:44,456
[Carrie]
Charlotte was impressed
with Bunny's technique.
277
00:11:44,542 --> 00:11:47,922
Trey had been looking
forward to Cloche all week.
278
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:49,500
Meanwhile, downtown,
279
00:11:49,583 --> 00:11:52,083
Samantha was
entertaining Adam Ball,
280
00:11:52,166 --> 00:11:54,576
a film editor who made
a very lucrative living
281
00:11:54,667 --> 00:11:57,707
cutting the coming attractions
for film companies.
282
00:11:57,792 --> 00:11:59,542
I'm coming...
283
00:11:59,625 --> 00:12:00,915
I'm coming.
284
00:12:01,000 --> 00:12:02,830
Ah!
285
00:12:04,417 --> 00:12:06,627
Oh, man.
286
00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:08,960
Oh, you give good head.
287
00:12:14,291 --> 00:12:17,631
I'm dating a guy with
the funkiest tasting spunk.
288
00:12:24,375 --> 00:12:26,455
And she's never
coming back.
289
00:12:26,542 --> 00:12:29,382
Well, I'm sorry, but who else
can I talk to about this?
290
00:12:29,458 --> 00:12:30,918
Might I suggest
no one?
291
00:12:31,041 --> 00:12:32,791
You're my girlfriends,
help me.
292
00:12:32,875 --> 00:12:34,875
Have you ever
had this problem?
293
00:12:34,959 --> 00:12:36,749
Not really,
but I have to admit,
294
00:12:36,834 --> 00:12:38,884
it's never exactly been
a trip to Baskin Robbins.
295
00:12:38,959 --> 00:12:40,919
[Samantha]
Well, this guy is very sour.
296
00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:43,830
Like, asparagus
gone bad or something.
297
00:12:43,917 --> 00:12:45,877
Can I cancel my rice pudding?
Thanks.
298
00:12:45,959 --> 00:12:48,959
[Samantha]
Beautiful guy, great in bed,
it's so disappointing.
299
00:12:49,041 --> 00:12:51,421
It's like getting a bad bottle
of Beaujolais Nouveau
300
00:12:51,500 --> 00:12:52,790
the first day of season.
301
00:12:52,875 --> 00:12:54,325
It has a lot to do
with nutrition.
302
00:12:54,417 --> 00:12:57,327
I once dated a smoker and
it affected how his tasted.
303
00:12:57,417 --> 00:12:58,877
They should put that on
the side of the pack
304
00:12:58,959 --> 00:13:00,379
if they want to
cut back sales.
305
00:13:00,458 --> 00:13:02,918
Maybe there's something he can
eat to make it sweeter?
306
00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:04,750
Maybe you should write
to Martha Stewart.
307
00:13:04,834 --> 00:13:05,754
"Dear Martha,
308
00:13:05,834 --> 00:13:07,424
Funky Spunk.
Help."
309
00:13:07,500 --> 00:13:09,420
"Dear Funky Spunk,
310
00:13:09,500 --> 00:13:11,250
try a hint of mint."
311
00:13:11,333 --> 00:13:13,213
No, no, it's not
just asparagus.
312
00:13:13,291 --> 00:13:15,131
It's asparagus
and something else.
313
00:13:15,208 --> 00:13:16,578
I know, Clorox!
314
00:13:16,667 --> 00:13:19,167
Well, at least you'll
get your whites whiter.
315
00:13:19,250 --> 00:13:20,790
This is serious,
I almost gagged.
316
00:13:20,875 --> 00:13:22,915
-Oh, well, that is serious.
-What am I going to do?
317
00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:24,460
Just don't give
him head again.
318
00:13:24,875 --> 00:13:27,075
Hmm. I never even
thought of that.
319
00:13:27,166 --> 00:13:29,206
So, what, "casual head"
is back now?
320
00:13:29,291 --> 00:13:31,831
Oh, it's fine. He's healthy and
I don't swallow.
321
00:13:31,917 --> 00:13:35,127
Well, as long as you and
the "Center for Disease Control"
are fine with it.
322
00:13:35,208 --> 00:13:38,288
Of course, he just loves
getting head.
But then, what man doesn't?
323
00:13:38,375 --> 00:13:40,665
You know, if the whole
cum situation were reversed,
324
00:13:40,750 --> 00:13:43,250
do you think that men would even
get anywhere near the stuff?
325
00:13:43,333 --> 00:13:46,003
Well, maybe...
if it tasted like beer.
326
00:13:48,417 --> 00:13:51,127
[Carrie] Later that day,
Miranda came home to something
327
00:13:51,208 --> 00:13:52,998
that was even
harder to swallow.
328
00:13:53,083 --> 00:13:56,543
[voice on answering machine]
You have one new message.
329
00:13:56,625 --> 00:13:59,205
[woman]
Hi, if this is
Steve's number...
330
00:13:59,291 --> 00:14:00,381
this is Mira.
331
00:14:00,458 --> 00:14:01,918
We met last night.
332
00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:04,630
I'm the advertising exec
who ordered the Amstel Light.
333
00:14:04,709 --> 00:14:07,249
Steve, if this is you,
call me.
334
00:14:07,333 --> 00:14:10,333
I'd love to go to
a movie sometime.
335
00:14:10,417 --> 00:14:14,827
[voice on answering machine]
Today, 12:22 p.m.
336
00:14:14,917 --> 00:14:17,577
[Carrie]
And on an answering machine
across town...
337
00:14:19,417 --> 00:14:22,747
[voice on answering machine]
You have one new message.
338
00:14:22,834 --> 00:14:24,754
[Big]
Hi, it's me.
339
00:14:24,834 --> 00:14:27,254
I need to talk to you about
what I said the other day.
340
00:14:27,333 --> 00:14:28,583
It's important,
please call.
341
00:14:28,667 --> 00:14:30,667
-You know my cell number.
-[machine beeps]
342
00:14:30,750 --> 00:14:34,170
[Carrie] The right side
of my brain told me the
right thing was to delete it.
343
00:14:34,250 --> 00:14:35,830
But I left it.
344
00:14:35,917 --> 00:14:38,167
[Big]
It's important, please call.
You know my cell number.
345
00:14:38,250 --> 00:14:39,460
[Carrie]
Seven playbacks later,
346
00:14:39,542 --> 00:14:41,382
I invited over
an impartial judge.
347
00:14:41,458 --> 00:14:43,328
-Well?
-You should have punched him.
348
00:14:43,417 --> 00:14:45,207
He wants to get
back together, right?
349
00:14:45,291 --> 00:14:46,421
I mean, that's the tone.
350
00:14:46,500 --> 00:14:48,000
The "Hi" and then
the "It's important."
351
00:14:48,083 --> 00:14:49,463
Is that what
that means?
352
00:14:49,542 --> 00:14:51,922
Carrie, we could analyze
this for years and never know.
353
00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:54,210
I mean, they still don't
know who killed Kennedy.
354
00:14:54,291 --> 00:14:56,381
Well, what should I do?
355
00:14:56,458 --> 00:14:58,248
Well, it's pretty obvious
what you want to do
356
00:14:58,333 --> 00:15:00,083
or you wouldn't still be
listening to this message.
357
00:15:00,166 --> 00:15:01,376
And by the way,
358
00:15:01,458 --> 00:15:04,038
what happened to
the "not insane" part of you?
359
00:15:04,125 --> 00:15:05,245
I don't know.
360
00:15:05,333 --> 00:15:07,833
After the fifth playback
he got in a little.
361
00:15:08,333 --> 00:15:11,083
-God, I hate my machine.
-Yeah.
362
00:15:11,166 --> 00:15:13,126
I hate mine too.
363
00:15:13,375 --> 00:15:16,035
Steve got a message
from some girl executive
364
00:15:16,125 --> 00:15:17,785
desperate for him
to go to a movie.
365
00:15:17,875 --> 00:15:20,415
Already?
He's still on your couch.
366
00:15:20,500 --> 00:15:21,880
I know, it's amazing.
367
00:15:21,959 --> 00:15:24,789
A 34-year-old guy with
no money and no place to live,
368
00:15:24,875 --> 00:15:26,625
because he's single,
he's a catch.
369
00:15:26,709 --> 00:15:29,999
But a 34-year-old woman
with a job and a great home,
370
00:15:30,083 --> 00:15:32,463
because she's single,
is considered tragic.
371
00:15:32,542 --> 00:15:33,962
So depressing.
372
00:15:34,709 --> 00:15:36,879
Let's listen to
that message again.
373
00:15:37,667 --> 00:15:39,377
I'm deleting it.
374
00:15:39,458 --> 00:15:41,418
But it wasn't that simple.
375
00:15:41,500 --> 00:15:42,580
As soon as Miranda left,
376
00:15:42,667 --> 00:15:43,877
I stood and watched my emotions
377
00:15:43,959 --> 00:15:45,959
overrule both sides of my brain.
378
00:15:46,041 --> 00:15:48,171
[phone ringing]
379
00:15:48,250 --> 00:15:49,250
Hello?
380
00:15:49,333 --> 00:15:50,293
It's Carrie.
381
00:15:50,375 --> 00:15:51,375
Oh, hey.
382
00:15:51,458 --> 00:15:52,958
Yeah, thanks for calling.
383
00:15:53,583 --> 00:15:56,633
Look, it's about
what I said about getting
out of my marriage...
384
00:15:56,709 --> 00:15:58,249
[Carrie]
I didn't know why I called,
385
00:15:58,333 --> 00:15:59,753
I didn't even know
what I really wanted,
386
00:15:59,834 --> 00:16:02,254
but suddenly my heart
was racing.
387
00:16:03,208 --> 00:16:04,828
I thought about it.
388
00:16:05,208 --> 00:16:08,078
And it's going to
cost me a lot.
389
00:16:08,166 --> 00:16:10,876
So, maybe you should
forget about what I said.
390
00:16:11,458 --> 00:16:12,578
I mean...
391
00:16:12,667 --> 00:16:15,167
I figure I made my bed,
I should lie in it.
392
00:16:15,834 --> 00:16:17,384
You do that.
393
00:16:18,500 --> 00:16:19,960
It was just what I needed,
394
00:16:20,041 --> 00:16:23,421
a big shock treatment to
jolt me right back to sanity.
395
00:16:26,041 --> 00:16:27,711
You have cracks.
396
00:16:28,625 --> 00:16:30,205
Excuse me?
397
00:16:30,875 --> 00:16:32,165
The ceiling.
398
00:16:32,458 --> 00:16:33,828
Oh.
399
00:16:35,125 --> 00:16:36,705
How long they
been there?
400
00:16:37,375 --> 00:16:38,785
Just three years.
401
00:16:38,875 --> 00:16:41,665
Oh, just three years? [laughs]
402
00:16:42,750 --> 00:16:44,170
Don't take this
the wrong way,
403
00:16:44,250 --> 00:16:47,170
but this place could
use a little work.
404
00:16:47,250 --> 00:16:49,170
I know, but I can't
afford it.
405
00:16:49,250 --> 00:16:51,500
You've got 8,000 bucks
worth of shoes over there.
406
00:16:51,583 --> 00:16:52,833
I needed those.
407
00:16:52,917 --> 00:16:54,247
Oh.
408
00:16:55,333 --> 00:16:56,793
You could do
little things.
409
00:16:56,875 --> 00:16:58,495
Plaster,
strip the floors.
410
00:16:58,583 --> 00:17:01,293
You have no idea
how beautiful it'd be if we...
411
00:17:01,834 --> 00:17:03,634
took it
down a level.
412
00:17:04,709 --> 00:17:06,999
I don't know how
to do that stuff.
413
00:17:07,083 --> 00:17:08,383
I do.
414
00:17:08,875 --> 00:17:10,825
Let me strip your floors.
415
00:17:10,917 --> 00:17:12,327
Isn't that a lot of work?
416
00:17:12,417 --> 00:17:13,707
Nah.
417
00:17:13,792 --> 00:17:15,672
It'll just take a day.
You won't even
know I'm here.
418
00:17:15,750 --> 00:17:16,920
You sure?
419
00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:18,000
Really?
420
00:17:18,083 --> 00:17:20,213
A special lady
needs a special home.
421
00:17:25,458 --> 00:17:28,878
[Carrie]
Here in my arms was a guy who
wanted to make my home better,
422
00:17:28,959 --> 00:17:30,209
and somewhere out there
423
00:17:30,291 --> 00:17:32,541
was a guy who wanted
to pull it apart.
424
00:17:32,625 --> 00:17:34,415
It wasn't a left
or right brainer.
425
00:17:34,500 --> 00:17:36,000
It was a no brainer.
426
00:17:36,959 --> 00:17:38,379
Tell me why
we're here again?
427
00:17:38,458 --> 00:17:40,458
I'm making an effort
to eat better.
428
00:17:40,542 --> 00:17:44,252
[Carrie]
After a quick browse on
the healthysperm.com web page,
429
00:17:44,333 --> 00:17:47,133
Samantha invited
Adam ball to dinner.
430
00:17:47,291 --> 00:17:48,751
[waiter] Okay.
431
00:17:48,834 --> 00:17:51,174
Here are your
wheatgrass shots.
432
00:17:51,667 --> 00:17:54,667
And I'll be right
back with menus.
433
00:18:00,625 --> 00:18:01,915
I can't drink that.
434
00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:04,170
Oh, try it.
It's very good for you.
435
00:18:05,625 --> 00:18:07,165
Bottoms up.
436
00:18:14,208 --> 00:18:16,288
Mmm.
437
00:18:22,500 --> 00:18:24,710
Oh, man,
that shit is funky.
438
00:18:24,792 --> 00:18:27,082
[Carrie] Samantha had to fight
every urge she had
439
00:18:27,166 --> 00:18:29,876
not to tell Adam Ball
he didn't know from funky.
440
00:18:30,333 --> 00:18:32,583
How long does it take
for the wheatgrass
441
00:18:32,667 --> 00:18:34,327
to work its way
into your system?
442
00:18:34,417 --> 00:18:36,747
Ah, hard to say...
443
00:18:36,834 --> 00:18:38,634
Ballpark?
444
00:18:39,291 --> 00:18:40,421
An hour and a half.
445
00:18:40,500 --> 00:18:41,330
Oh...
446
00:18:41,417 --> 00:18:43,417
We should order.
447
00:18:43,500 --> 00:18:45,580
[Carrie] An hour and a half,
two wheatgrass shots,
448
00:18:45,667 --> 00:18:47,667
and a ginger melon
smoothie later...
449
00:18:47,750 --> 00:18:50,170
[Adam] I'm coming...
Ah, I'm coming...
450
00:18:50,500 --> 00:18:51,460
I'm coming!
451
00:18:51,542 --> 00:18:52,672
[moaning]
452
00:18:53,625 --> 00:18:55,535
Oh, man, man, man...
453
00:18:55,625 --> 00:18:57,205
You give good head.
454
00:18:57,667 --> 00:18:59,077
[breathing heavily]
455
00:19:02,291 --> 00:19:03,921
Oh, baby.
456
00:19:07,875 --> 00:19:08,875
[Charlotte] What?
457
00:19:08,959 --> 00:19:10,249
You don't like
your salad?
458
00:19:10,333 --> 00:19:12,423
No, the dressing's a tad...
459
00:19:12,500 --> 00:19:13,330
something.
460
00:19:13,417 --> 00:19:14,457
-Excuse me.
-Yes, sir?
461
00:19:14,542 --> 00:19:15,792
I'd like to change this
462
00:19:15,875 --> 00:19:17,455
for the arugula and endive,
please.
463
00:19:17,542 --> 00:19:18,672
[waitress] Certainly.
464
00:19:18,750 --> 00:19:20,380
Maybe you should try
the tomato basil,
465
00:19:20,458 --> 00:19:21,878
it's sweeter.
466
00:19:22,125 --> 00:19:23,245
Alrighty.
467
00:19:28,333 --> 00:19:30,463
I have to say,
mum is quite taken with you.
468
00:19:30,542 --> 00:19:33,212
-She is?
-Why wouldn't she be?
469
00:19:33,291 --> 00:19:34,711
You're exquisite.
470
00:19:36,291 --> 00:19:38,001
You really are
a dream come true.
471
00:19:38,083 --> 00:19:39,923
[Carrie] Charlotte knew this
was the moment.
472
00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:44,080
That magic moment where Trey was
going to ask her to be his wife.
473
00:19:46,166 --> 00:19:47,246
Charlotte?
474
00:19:47,333 --> 00:19:48,583
Yes?
475
00:19:50,625 --> 00:19:51,955
[waitress] Tomato and basil?
476
00:19:52,583 --> 00:19:53,583
Yes.
477
00:19:56,834 --> 00:19:58,044
Enjoy.
478
00:19:58,125 --> 00:20:01,205
Doesn't this look like
a little plate of heaven?
479
00:20:02,333 --> 00:20:04,963
This basil
is perfection.
480
00:20:05,041 --> 00:20:06,881
What is it about you,
Charlotte?
481
00:20:06,959 --> 00:20:10,249
You always seem to
know just what I want.
482
00:20:13,458 --> 00:20:15,328
Maybe we should
get married.
483
00:20:15,417 --> 00:20:17,077
Alrighty.
484
00:20:19,625 --> 00:20:22,285
Mmm. Mmm!
485
00:20:23,834 --> 00:20:24,884
I'm engaged.
486
00:20:24,959 --> 00:20:27,379
Oh, my God!
Really?
487
00:20:27,458 --> 00:20:29,418
Oh, that's wonderful,
sweetie.
488
00:20:29,500 --> 00:20:31,170
I proposed to myself.
489
00:20:31,959 --> 00:20:33,919
-What?
-Yes.
490
00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:36,000
I suggested he have
a tomato salad,
491
00:20:36,083 --> 00:20:38,083
then I suggested
we get married.
492
00:20:38,166 --> 00:20:40,076
Wait, what exactly
did he say?
493
00:20:40,750 --> 00:20:42,250
"Alrighty."
494
00:20:43,750 --> 00:20:44,710
"Alrighty"?
495
00:20:44,792 --> 00:20:46,252
He said "alrighty"?
496
00:20:46,333 --> 00:20:48,793
Now I'm thinking the upsetting
thing isn't that you proposed,
497
00:20:48,875 --> 00:20:51,165
it's that you proposed to
a guy who says "alrighty."
498
00:20:51,250 --> 00:20:53,250
-Oh, Carrie, stop.
-Alrighty.
499
00:20:53,333 --> 00:20:55,503
I was the one who
was supposed to say yes!
500
00:20:55,583 --> 00:20:58,543
Oh, who cares about
those stupid rules?
501
00:20:58,625 --> 00:20:59,875
I do!
502
00:21:00,333 --> 00:21:01,753
Look, you're overreacting.
503
00:21:01,834 --> 00:21:03,424
You love Trey, right?
504
00:21:03,500 --> 00:21:05,500
And you want
to marry him, right?
505
00:21:06,375 --> 00:21:07,705
Yes, but...
506
00:21:08,875 --> 00:21:10,325
there was no kneeling,
507
00:21:10,417 --> 00:21:12,827
there was no ring,
no nothing.
508
00:21:13,166 --> 00:21:15,576
This is an awful
engagement story.
509
00:21:15,667 --> 00:21:17,127
What am I supposed
to tell my kids?
510
00:21:17,208 --> 00:21:19,418
Well, mommy really wanted
to get married,
511
00:21:19,500 --> 00:21:21,670
so daddy said,
"Alrighty."
512
00:21:22,667 --> 00:21:24,747
It's so unromantic.
513
00:21:24,834 --> 00:21:26,004
Oh.
514
00:21:30,834 --> 00:21:32,674
[barking]
515
00:21:38,750 --> 00:21:40,210
Steve?
516
00:21:40,417 --> 00:21:41,827
The dog!
517
00:21:42,667 --> 00:21:44,537
-[barking continues]
-[sighs]
518
00:21:45,792 --> 00:21:47,542
[sighing heavily]
519
00:21:48,709 --> 00:21:52,329
Steve, it's 4:00 a.m.!
520
00:21:57,542 --> 00:22:00,502
[Carrie] Miranda realized he was
with the girl executive.
521
00:22:00,583 --> 00:22:02,213
It was officially over.
522
00:22:02,291 --> 00:22:04,671
She finally got it
into her head.
523
00:22:06,208 --> 00:22:07,998
[dog whimpering]
524
00:22:08,625 --> 00:22:10,075
Hey.
525
00:22:18,625 --> 00:22:20,455
-Morning.
-[Miranda] Morning.
526
00:22:20,542 --> 00:22:22,172
I took the dog
out already.
527
00:22:22,250 --> 00:22:24,040
Thanks, um, I was--
528
00:22:24,125 --> 00:22:27,415
There's coffee and I circled
a bunch of apartments
529
00:22:27,500 --> 00:22:29,250
in The Village Voice
that sound good.
530
00:22:29,333 --> 00:22:31,833
I should probably
get out of here today, um...
531
00:22:32,291 --> 00:22:34,541
Thanks for letting me
sleep on your couch.
532
00:22:34,959 --> 00:22:36,539
You're welcome.
533
00:22:47,709 --> 00:22:49,459
I think we did
pretty good.
534
00:22:51,792 --> 00:22:53,582
We did us proud.
535
00:22:54,291 --> 00:22:55,461
Steve...
536
00:22:56,583 --> 00:22:57,883
Never mind.
537
00:22:57,959 --> 00:22:59,169
What?
538
00:23:00,417 --> 00:23:02,377
I was gonna say
keep in touch,
539
00:23:02,458 --> 00:23:03,828
but that's weird, right?
540
00:23:03,917 --> 00:23:05,417
That would be weird.
541
00:23:06,166 --> 00:23:07,786
I guess we
could do that.
542
00:23:16,583 --> 00:23:19,043
[upbeat music playing]
543
00:23:19,125 --> 00:23:21,665
[sander whirring loudly]
544
00:23:35,959 --> 00:23:42,829
Aidan!
545
00:23:44,875 --> 00:23:46,995
You said I wouldn't
be bothered...
546
00:23:47,083 --> 00:23:48,753
I'm-- I'm bothered.
547
00:23:48,834 --> 00:23:49,924
It's too loud?
548
00:23:50,000 --> 00:23:51,250
Yeah, and I can't
work through that.
549
00:23:51,333 --> 00:23:52,713
I've got a deadline.
550
00:23:52,792 --> 00:23:54,422
Take my keys,
go to my house.
551
00:23:54,500 --> 00:23:57,420
No, no, I can't write there,
'cause Pete's jumping
all over me,
552
00:23:57,500 --> 00:23:59,250
he's deleting things.
553
00:23:59,792 --> 00:24:01,252
You know what, I'm leaving.
If anyone calls,
554
00:24:01,333 --> 00:24:03,043
I'll be at the Stanhope hotel
around the corner.
555
00:24:03,125 --> 00:24:04,075
At least let me
pay for it.
556
00:24:04,166 --> 00:24:05,166
No, no, no.
557
00:24:05,250 --> 00:24:06,670
I got it, I got it.
558
00:24:06,917 --> 00:24:09,497
See, this is why
I don't do home repairs.
559
00:24:10,125 --> 00:24:11,625
Unforeseen costs.
560
00:24:11,709 --> 00:24:13,249
[Aidan] You're going to
love these floors!
561
00:24:13,333 --> 00:24:15,333
Mum was beside herself.
562
00:24:15,417 --> 00:24:17,417
She immediately demanded
your address
563
00:24:17,500 --> 00:24:18,750
so she could send flowers.
564
00:24:18,834 --> 00:24:20,334
That's nice.
565
00:24:20,417 --> 00:24:22,417
[Carrie] Charlotte had done
the impossible in New York.
566
00:24:22,500 --> 00:24:24,750
She was engaged to
her heart's desire.
567
00:24:24,834 --> 00:24:27,044
Unfortunately, she couldn't
get the way it happened
568
00:24:27,125 --> 00:24:28,165
out of her head.
569
00:24:28,250 --> 00:24:29,290
Wait.
570
00:24:29,917 --> 00:24:32,077
I think we should
stop here for a minute.
571
00:24:35,458 --> 00:24:36,788
Maybe we should
go in there
572
00:24:36,875 --> 00:24:39,575
and find you the most beautiful
ring that they have.
573
00:24:41,041 --> 00:24:43,921
-Alrighty!
-[Trey chuckles]
574
00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:46,580
[Carrie]
From that moment on,
Charlotte would tell everyone,
575
00:24:46,667 --> 00:24:48,707
that right in
front of Tiffany's,
576
00:24:48,792 --> 00:24:50,132
out of nowhere,
577
00:24:50,208 --> 00:24:53,078
Trey popped the question
and she said,
578
00:24:53,166 --> 00:24:54,706
"Alrighty."
579
00:24:55,709 --> 00:24:57,829
[moaning]
580
00:25:08,125 --> 00:25:11,325
I'm-- I'm not really in the mood
for that tonight.
581
00:25:11,417 --> 00:25:13,747
Oh, come on, baby, you give
the greatest head, please.
582
00:25:13,834 --> 00:25:15,044
Uh-uh!
583
00:25:15,125 --> 00:25:16,575
Not gonna happen.
584
00:25:16,667 --> 00:25:18,127
What's the problem?
585
00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:23,130
Well, Adam...
586
00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:26,540
You've got some
funky tasting spunk.
587
00:25:26,625 --> 00:25:27,495
What?
588
00:25:27,583 --> 00:25:28,583
You heard me.
589
00:25:28,667 --> 00:25:30,287
Your spunk is funky.
590
00:25:30,917 --> 00:25:31,997
My "spunk"?
591
00:25:32,083 --> 00:25:34,463
Cum, spooge,
jizz, joy juice.
592
00:25:34,542 --> 00:25:35,962
Fun-ky.
593
00:25:36,041 --> 00:25:38,171
Man, I have heard some far out
excuses for not giving head,
594
00:25:38,250 --> 00:25:39,790
but this one
takes the cake.
595
00:25:39,875 --> 00:25:41,075
Excuse me?
596
00:25:41,583 --> 00:25:43,673
You're one of them
"two blow job chicks."
597
00:25:43,750 --> 00:25:45,540
You put blow jobs in
the coming attractions
598
00:25:45,625 --> 00:25:47,375
that I'm never gonna see
in the actual movie.
599
00:25:47,458 --> 00:25:48,878
I resent that!
600
00:25:48,959 --> 00:25:50,419
I love giving head.
601
00:25:50,500 --> 00:25:52,380
Well, then come on,
give me a little B.J.
602
00:25:52,458 --> 00:25:54,248
Up and down a couple times,
you're done.
603
00:25:54,333 --> 00:25:55,833
-It's easy.
-[Samantha] Easy?
604
00:25:55,917 --> 00:25:59,167
You men have no idea what
we're dealing with down there.
605
00:25:59,458 --> 00:26:01,128
Teeth placement
and jaw stress
606
00:26:01,208 --> 00:26:02,828
and suction
and gag reflex.
607
00:26:02,917 --> 00:26:04,827
And all the while
bobbing up and down,
608
00:26:04,917 --> 00:26:07,077
moaning and trying to
breathe through our noses.
609
00:26:07,166 --> 00:26:08,536
Easy? Honey!
610
00:26:08,959 --> 00:26:10,999
They don't call
it a job for nothing.
611
00:26:12,458 --> 00:26:15,288
Now, having said
all that...
612
00:26:15,667 --> 00:26:17,997
with the right man,
it can be fabulous.
613
00:26:19,792 --> 00:26:20,882
That is,
614
00:26:20,959 --> 00:26:23,379
unless the man
in question has spunk
615
00:26:23,458 --> 00:26:25,998
that's like a trip to
the rotten egg buffet.
616
00:26:26,250 --> 00:26:29,670
Come on, it can't
be that bad.
617
00:26:31,583 --> 00:26:33,713
I'll make a deal
with you.
618
00:26:34,625 --> 00:26:35,875
You try it.
619
00:26:36,709 --> 00:26:38,169
If you're fine with it,
620
00:26:39,208 --> 00:26:41,038
I'll be fine with it.
621
00:26:41,583 --> 00:26:43,043
I can't do that.
622
00:26:43,125 --> 00:26:46,995
-It's gay.
-It's not gay if it's you.
623
00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:49,830
Take it or leave it.
624
00:26:49,917 --> 00:26:51,707
[Carrie] Ten minutes later,
Samantha learned
625
00:26:51,792 --> 00:26:54,002
just how far a man would
go for a blow job.
626
00:26:57,667 --> 00:26:59,497
I'm fine with it.
627
00:27:03,959 --> 00:27:05,669
[Carrie]
Samantha kept her word.
628
00:27:05,750 --> 00:27:07,040
She gave him head...
629
00:27:07,125 --> 00:27:08,745
but her heart
wasn't in it.
630
00:27:13,208 --> 00:27:15,208
[phone ringing]
631
00:27:17,750 --> 00:27:19,580
-Hello.
-[Big] It's me.
632
00:27:19,667 --> 00:27:20,957
I'm in the lobby.
633
00:27:21,041 --> 00:27:22,331
How did you know
I was here?
634
00:27:22,417 --> 00:27:23,917
That guy at your place.
635
00:27:24,000 --> 00:27:26,080
You called
my house again?
636
00:27:26,166 --> 00:27:27,496
I have to talk to you.
637
00:27:27,583 --> 00:27:28,793
Yeah, I have to
talk to you too.
638
00:27:28,875 --> 00:27:30,705
Stay in the lobby,
I'll be right down.
639
00:27:31,250 --> 00:27:32,580
Shit!
640
00:27:46,333 --> 00:27:48,133
This is not the lobby.
641
00:27:48,208 --> 00:27:49,498
Sit down, have a drink.
642
00:27:49,583 --> 00:27:51,213
What are you doing?
You're calling my house...
643
00:27:51,291 --> 00:27:52,961
You follow me to hotels?
644
00:27:53,041 --> 00:27:54,581
Could you please sit down...
645
00:27:54,792 --> 00:27:56,582
for one minute
and listen to me?
646
00:27:56,667 --> 00:27:58,247
Please, one minute.
647
00:28:01,583 --> 00:28:02,753
You know,
I don't have time for this,
648
00:28:02,834 --> 00:28:04,334
I have a boyfriend
and a deadline.
649
00:28:04,417 --> 00:28:06,877
And you have a wife
and apparently
a drinking problem.
650
00:28:06,959 --> 00:28:08,749
-I'm not drunk.
-Then what is your excuse?
651
00:28:08,834 --> 00:28:11,084
Will you slow down?
I can't think.
652
00:28:16,500 --> 00:28:18,710
I was an asshole to you
on the phone the other day.
653
00:28:18,792 --> 00:28:19,882
Yes.
654
00:28:20,583 --> 00:28:22,963
When I said I was leaving
you didn't say anything,
655
00:28:23,041 --> 00:28:24,631
so I got nervous,
so I...
656
00:28:24,709 --> 00:28:26,169
So, what?
657
00:28:26,250 --> 00:28:27,540
So...
658
00:28:28,291 --> 00:28:30,581
-I don't know!
-You know, this has to stop!
659
00:28:30,667 --> 00:28:33,707
This-- the flirting
and the jerking me around
660
00:28:33,792 --> 00:28:35,382
and the calling
my boyfriend.
661
00:28:35,625 --> 00:28:38,915
He doesn't know about you
and I don't want him
to ever know about you.
662
00:28:39,125 --> 00:28:40,035
Why is that?
663
00:28:40,125 --> 00:28:42,165
Oh, go lay in
your beige bed.
664
00:28:51,542 --> 00:28:53,462
Carrie, wait, wait!
665
00:28:53,709 --> 00:28:55,829
I haven't explained
this very well.
666
00:28:55,917 --> 00:28:57,787
Now, wait a minute. Listen.
667
00:28:57,875 --> 00:28:59,375
-The thing is...
-[elevator dings]
668
00:28:59,458 --> 00:29:00,828
Fuck, I miss you!
669
00:29:00,917 --> 00:29:01,997
Too bad.
670
00:29:03,375 --> 00:29:05,955
Do not come in here!
Don't follow me in here!
671
00:29:06,041 --> 00:29:07,961
-I have to talk to you.
-What, what is it?
672
00:29:08,041 --> 00:29:09,791
What is it you
have to say?
673
00:29:10,333 --> 00:29:11,583
I made a mistake.
674
00:29:14,333 --> 00:29:15,543
Fuck you.
675
00:29:16,125 --> 00:29:17,205
I love you.
676
00:29:20,083 --> 00:29:21,503
Fuck you.
677
00:29:25,792 --> 00:29:28,292
[Carrie] My mind was yelling
how angry I was,
678
00:29:28,375 --> 00:29:29,995
but my heart...
679
00:29:30,500 --> 00:29:31,500
My heart.
680
00:29:31,583 --> 00:29:33,003
Fuck me.
681
00:29:52,291 --> 00:29:55,081
And just like that,
I lost my head.