1 00:00:51,016 --> 00:00:54,006 The single New Yorker's weekend is all about buying... 2 00:00:54,012 --> 00:00:57,002 The latest Vogue, fresh flowers, 3 00:00:57,006 --> 00:01:01,006 and gifts for previously single New Yorkers. 4 00:01:01,008 --> 00:01:03,998 Hi, I'm here for the Welker wedding registry? 5 00:01:04,006 --> 00:01:05,016 I'll take the Newport soup ladle 6 00:01:06,000 --> 00:01:07,020 and three Bimini steak knives. 7 00:01:07,020 --> 00:01:09,010 The Baby Peck list. 8 00:01:09,008 --> 00:01:10,018 The Burpee Blanket. 9 00:01:11,001 --> 00:01:12,021 Okay, what is left? 10 00:01:12,021 --> 00:01:15,011 Fine, fine, I'll take four espresso cups 11 00:01:15,008 --> 00:01:16,018 and a pepper grinder. 12 00:01:16,018 --> 00:01:20,018 Yeah, okay, the L'il Me Activity Chair. 13 00:01:22,008 --> 00:01:24,998 That night, Stanford and I were invited to celebrate 14 00:01:25,005 --> 00:01:27,005 the arrival of baby boy Bronson, 15 00:01:27,008 --> 00:01:29,008 latest son of Kyra and Chuck. 16 00:01:29,014 --> 00:01:31,004 -Easy, baby girl. -Sorry. 17 00:01:31,002 --> 00:01:32,022 Hey, whatcha got in there, Stanny? 18 00:01:32,021 --> 00:01:34,021 The Peter Rabbit dish set, 19 00:01:34,017 --> 00:01:35,997 with matching bib. 20 00:01:36,003 --> 00:01:37,023 Dang, you snagged that? 21 00:01:37,023 --> 00:01:41,003 Oh, thanks to you, I was left with the L'il Me Chair. 22 00:01:41,006 --> 00:01:42,006 Oh, and get this, 23 00:01:42,008 --> 00:01:45,008 I also got him a CD of Free To Be You and Me. 24 00:01:45,015 --> 00:01:47,005 I loved Marlo Thomas! 25 00:01:47,010 --> 00:01:49,010 I played that album all through the fifth grade! 26 00:01:49,011 --> 00:01:53,001 I wanted to run as fast as the wind. 27 00:01:53,004 --> 00:01:55,014 I played "William Wants A Doll" so many times 28 00:01:55,013 --> 00:01:58,013 I almost turned my little sister into a gay man. 29 00:02:06,017 --> 00:02:07,017 Oh, hey! 30 00:02:07,019 --> 00:02:09,009 -Welcome to the party... -Hey. 31 00:02:09,016 --> 00:02:10,996 I'm Margot, Kyra's sister. 32 00:02:11,003 --> 00:02:12,023 The gifts go over on the table, 33 00:02:12,018 --> 00:02:14,008 and the shoes go there. 34 00:02:18,011 --> 00:02:19,011 Oh. 35 00:02:19,012 --> 00:02:21,022 Kyra and Chuck don't like outside dirt coming in. 36 00:02:22,001 --> 00:02:24,011 The twins are always picking things up off the floor. 37 00:02:24,014 --> 00:02:28,014 But this is an outfit. 38 00:02:28,010 --> 00:02:30,020 Uh-huh, they'd really appreciate it. 39 00:02:31,001 --> 00:02:32,011 Margot! 40 00:02:37,022 --> 00:02:40,002 Good thing I wore my party socks. 41 00:02:40,006 --> 00:02:42,016 Geez, if I'd known I was gonna be shoeless, 42 00:02:42,018 --> 00:02:47,008 I would have compensated with a big hat or something. 43 00:02:47,012 --> 00:02:49,012 Okay. 44 00:02:49,013 --> 00:02:51,013 Well, now I'm so teeny 45 00:02:51,015 --> 00:02:54,005 I might bump my head on the coffee table. 46 00:02:54,011 --> 00:02:56,001 Watch out, L'il Me! 47 00:02:57,015 --> 00:02:59,005 Our hostess, Kyra Bronson, 48 00:02:59,016 --> 00:03:01,996 had made a name for herself in the early '90s 49 00:03:02,004 --> 00:03:04,024 taking pictures of anorexic actresses 50 00:03:04,019 --> 00:03:06,009 on beds at the Chelsea Hotel. 51 00:03:06,013 --> 00:03:08,013 -Hey, you two! -Hey. 52 00:03:08,013 --> 00:03:11,013 Now, she took pictures of fat babies in buckets. 53 00:03:11,009 --> 00:03:13,019 We come from the east... 70's, 54 00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:15,010 bearing gifts. 55 00:03:15,010 --> 00:03:16,010 Where is the blessed child? 56 00:03:16,015 --> 00:03:17,015 The baby, he's in his room. 57 00:03:17,021 --> 00:03:19,011 You can't miss him, he looks just like Chuck, 58 00:03:19,015 --> 00:03:21,015 except without that sad closed-up hole in his ear 59 00:03:21,017 --> 00:03:23,017 from when he pierced it in the '80s. 60 00:03:23,018 --> 00:03:25,008 -Anyway, here. -Oh, thank you. 61 00:03:25,013 --> 00:03:27,013 I've gotta go, other people need drinks, 62 00:03:27,007 --> 00:03:28,017 and by others I mean me! 63 00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:31,010 -Hey, Milo, Allegra! 64 00:03:31,011 --> 00:03:36,011 Oh, waiter, there's a baby in my drink. 65 00:03:36,008 --> 00:03:38,998 Uptown, Miranda was putting her foot down 66 00:03:39,005 --> 00:03:40,015 in her co-op board meeting. 67 00:03:40,023 --> 00:03:43,023 Look, we all want to find the perfect tenant for 10G, 68 00:03:43,022 --> 00:03:46,012 all I'm asking is that we not prolong the interview. 69 00:03:46,007 --> 00:03:48,007 Whatever decision we make about... 70 00:03:48,013 --> 00:03:51,003 -Dr. Robert Leeds, let's make it quick. 71 00:03:51,004 --> 00:03:54,004 I've got a baby downstairs getting over the chickenpox. 72 00:03:54,004 --> 00:03:55,024 I have a cataract! 73 00:03:57,015 --> 00:03:58,995 Hello, come in, won't you? 74 00:03:59,005 --> 00:04:00,015 -Hi. -Yes, hi. 75 00:04:01,001 --> 00:04:05,011 And suddenly, Miranda wasn't so bored at her board meeting. 76 00:04:05,012 --> 00:04:08,002 Hi, I'm Miranda Hobbes. 77 00:04:08,002 --> 00:04:09,002 Hi. 78 00:04:09,004 --> 00:04:10,004 And this is... 79 00:04:10,006 --> 00:04:11,006 everybody else. 80 00:04:11,009 --> 00:04:12,019 And I'm Robert Leeds. 81 00:04:13,000 --> 00:04:15,000 But you probably know that already, 82 00:04:15,006 --> 00:04:18,006 along with my social security number and my jacket size. 83 00:04:20,015 --> 00:04:24,995 So, Robert, you're a doctor for the Knicks? 84 00:04:25,002 --> 00:04:26,012 Yeah, guilty as charged. 85 00:04:26,014 --> 00:04:27,024 How long have you had that-- 86 00:04:27,017 --> 00:04:28,017 Hey, you've had a great season! 87 00:04:28,022 --> 00:04:32,002 I take it you're not a basketball fan. 88 00:04:32,006 --> 00:04:35,006 Well, you've got me there, I'm a baseball person. 89 00:04:35,013 --> 00:04:36,023 Yankees or Mets? 90 00:04:37,001 --> 00:04:38,021 Please, Yankees. 91 00:04:38,020 --> 00:04:40,010 Oh, should have known. 92 00:04:40,008 --> 00:04:42,008 And what is that supposed to mean? 93 00:04:42,008 --> 00:04:44,018 On page four of your tax return-- 94 00:04:44,017 --> 00:04:47,017 Lynn, please, we'll get to it. 95 00:04:49,009 --> 00:04:53,009 While Miranda was playing a game of pick-up... 96 00:04:53,007 --> 00:04:55,007 You tell them I'll do depositions Friday, 97 00:04:55,013 --> 00:04:57,013 but only if my client is ready. 98 00:04:57,022 --> 00:04:59,002 Uh-huh. 99 00:04:59,003 --> 00:05:01,013 ...Charlotte was picking up as well. 100 00:05:01,011 --> 00:05:03,021 Exactly. What are you going to push me on this? 101 00:05:03,023 --> 00:05:05,013 Don't push me! 102 00:05:05,012 --> 00:05:07,012 Because if you push me, then I push back! 103 00:05:07,013 --> 00:05:09,023 I don't have to produce my client for this, you know? 104 00:05:09,019 --> 00:05:11,009 Charlotte knew when Harry moved in, 105 00:05:11,012 --> 00:05:13,002 he would unpack his bags. 106 00:05:13,003 --> 00:05:16,013 -Exactly. Good. She wasn't expecting the tea bags. 107 00:05:16,013 --> 00:05:19,013 And everything else? 108 00:05:19,008 --> 00:05:20,018 Why are you hocking me on this? 109 00:05:20,021 --> 00:05:22,021 Can you not hear what I'm saying to you? 110 00:05:22,022 --> 00:05:24,012 Let me repeat this slower. 111 00:05:24,013 --> 00:05:27,003 Open your ears, ready, 'cause here it comes. 112 00:05:27,004 --> 00:05:28,024 I don't think so! 113 00:05:28,020 --> 00:05:29,020 Clear? 114 00:05:29,019 --> 00:05:31,019 One tax return and a half hour 115 00:05:31,018 --> 00:05:33,008 of eyelash batting later... 116 00:05:33,010 --> 00:05:35,000 It was really nice to meet you. 117 00:05:35,006 --> 00:05:37,006 You too. 118 00:05:37,008 --> 00:05:41,008 And, um, I won't hold that Mets thing against you. 119 00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:43,020 I appreciate that. 120 00:05:47,016 --> 00:05:50,006 Well, he's perfect. 121 00:05:50,015 --> 00:05:53,995 Frankly, I am concerned about his financials. 122 00:05:54,006 --> 00:05:56,016 His alimony payments are awfully high. 123 00:05:56,020 --> 00:05:58,020 And he's never owned before. 124 00:05:58,022 --> 00:06:00,002 You people are crazy. 125 00:06:00,006 --> 00:06:03,006 It's the single ones who always throw the wild parties 126 00:06:03,015 --> 00:06:06,005 with all the girls. 127 00:06:06,014 --> 00:06:10,024 Okay, I think we all know what's not being said here. 128 00:06:12,004 --> 00:06:15,024 The unspoken thing was that Robert was cute 129 00:06:15,020 --> 00:06:18,010 and Miranda was horny. 130 00:06:20,016 --> 00:06:23,016 And then we saw the most amazing house in Sag Harbor-- 131 00:06:23,017 --> 00:06:25,997 I swear I had no idea who we were bidding against. 132 00:06:26,002 --> 00:06:27,022 Oh, you liar! 133 00:06:27,017 --> 00:06:29,007 You two know everything! 134 00:06:29,009 --> 00:06:30,019 That's true. 135 00:06:30,017 --> 00:06:31,997 We got the house, 136 00:06:32,002 --> 00:06:34,012 but we could not get a table at Nick & Toni's 137 00:06:34,007 --> 00:06:35,997 for the rest of the summer! 138 00:06:38,013 --> 00:06:40,013 Well, it's getting late. 139 00:06:40,014 --> 00:06:43,004 Oh my, we have held you guys captive! 140 00:06:43,002 --> 00:06:44,022 No, no, we've had a swell time. 141 00:06:44,022 --> 00:06:48,012 It's just, it's midnight, he's gay, he has to start his night. 142 00:06:49,013 --> 00:06:51,013 Anyway, congrats on the baby. 143 00:06:51,012 --> 00:06:53,002 -Thanks. Yeah, he's just... 144 00:06:53,004 --> 00:06:54,014 precious. 145 00:06:54,016 --> 00:06:55,996 Okay, bye. 146 00:06:56,003 --> 00:06:57,023 -Bye. -Nice to meet you. 147 00:06:57,020 --> 00:06:59,000 And, of course, 148 00:06:59,004 --> 00:07:01,004 our landscaper takes off with half of our trees. 149 00:07:01,003 --> 00:07:03,013 We might have been one foot out the door... 150 00:07:03,014 --> 00:07:06,024 but my shoes appeared to have already left. 151 00:07:09,010 --> 00:07:11,020 And I told her that's what you get for stealing 152 00:07:11,018 --> 00:07:12,998 Billy Joel's firewood! 153 00:07:14,019 --> 00:07:15,019 Hi. 154 00:07:15,021 --> 00:07:17,021 Was there another room for the shoes? 155 00:07:17,018 --> 00:07:19,008 -No. -Uh-uh. 156 00:07:19,010 --> 00:07:22,010 Well, mine seem to have gone missing. 157 00:07:23,007 --> 00:07:25,007 That's crazy! 158 00:07:27,005 --> 00:07:28,005 God, Carrie, I'm sorry. 159 00:07:28,015 --> 00:07:31,015 I just can't imagine where your shoes went. 160 00:07:31,019 --> 00:07:33,009 You know, Jennifer was wearing sandals, 161 00:07:33,016 --> 00:07:35,006 perhaps she took yours by mistake. 162 00:07:35,016 --> 00:07:37,016 Well, actually, they weren't sandals, 163 00:07:37,022 --> 00:07:39,022 they were Manolos. 164 00:07:39,019 --> 00:07:41,009 I'm sure they'll turn up. 165 00:07:41,011 --> 00:07:43,021 I can loan you some shoes to go home in. 166 00:07:53,005 --> 00:07:55,995 They say you shouldn't judge until you've walked a mile 167 00:07:56,005 --> 00:07:58,015 in someone else's shoes. 168 00:07:58,023 --> 00:08:00,023 I made it six blocks. 169 00:08:03,005 --> 00:08:04,995 The next day over dessert, 170 00:08:05,002 --> 00:08:08,012 I was still not over the fact that my shoes had deserted me. 171 00:08:08,012 --> 00:08:10,002 These were new Manolos. 172 00:08:10,002 --> 00:08:12,012 I hadn't even done a full lap around the party. 173 00:08:12,010 --> 00:08:14,020 And you know I don't play favorites with my shoes, 174 00:08:14,018 --> 00:08:17,998 but these were very special. 175 00:08:18,004 --> 00:08:20,004 Who would steal shoes from a party? 176 00:08:20,003 --> 00:08:22,023 Someone size seven with excellent taste. 177 00:08:23,001 --> 00:08:25,021 Why in hell did you take your shoes off to begin with? 178 00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:27,000 We had to. 179 00:08:27,004 --> 00:08:28,014 For their kids. 180 00:08:28,008 --> 00:08:30,008 Apparently we drag things in on our heels 181 00:08:30,007 --> 00:08:31,007 that make children sick. 182 00:08:31,016 --> 00:08:33,996 Please, it's children who drag the germs around. 183 00:08:34,005 --> 00:08:36,005 Brady got the chickenpox courtesy of some kid 184 00:08:36,007 --> 00:08:38,017 who licked him at the playground. 185 00:08:38,021 --> 00:08:40,001 Oh, my God! 186 00:08:40,004 --> 00:08:41,024 Kyra must have been mortified. 187 00:08:41,021 --> 00:08:45,011 Actually, I kept waiting for the mortification that never came. 188 00:08:45,008 --> 00:08:47,018 She just said they might turn up and sent me home. 189 00:08:47,019 --> 00:08:50,009 Those shoes are not turning up anywhere but a pawn shop in Brooklyn. 190 00:08:50,015 --> 00:08:51,015 Oh, stop. 191 00:08:51,022 --> 00:08:54,022 I'm gonna cry in my flan. 192 00:08:54,019 --> 00:08:55,999 So that's it? 193 00:08:56,006 --> 00:08:57,016 They're just gone? 194 00:08:58,000 --> 00:08:59,010 Boo-hoo? 195 00:08:59,009 --> 00:09:00,999 Well, legally she owes you for them. 196 00:09:01,002 --> 00:09:03,022 I can't ask her to pay for my shoes. 197 00:09:03,019 --> 00:09:04,019 Why not? 198 00:09:05,000 --> 00:09:06,020 If you gave a party and told her to leave 199 00:09:06,021 --> 00:09:08,011 her baby outside in the hall, 200 00:09:08,008 --> 00:09:10,008 and her baby was missing at the end of the night, 201 00:09:10,013 --> 00:09:12,013 believe me, there'd be payback. 202 00:09:12,011 --> 00:09:14,021 That is the craziest thing I've ever heard. 203 00:09:15,001 --> 00:09:17,001 Children are not shoes. 204 00:09:17,003 --> 00:09:18,023 I know, I know, I'm not saying it. 205 00:09:18,022 --> 00:09:21,012 You have every right to be upset about your shoes. 206 00:09:21,013 --> 00:09:23,023 I am so sick of these people with their children. 207 00:09:24,001 --> 00:09:25,011 I'm telling you, they're everywhere. 208 00:09:25,010 --> 00:09:27,010 Sitting next to me in first class, 209 00:09:27,010 --> 00:09:29,010 eating at the next table at Jean-Ge-- 210 00:09:29,007 --> 00:09:30,007 Lucas... 211 00:09:30,011 --> 00:09:32,001 -Lucas, get over here right now. -Look at that. 212 00:09:32,002 --> 00:09:34,012 This place is for double cappuccinos, 213 00:09:34,011 --> 00:09:36,011 not double strollers. 214 00:09:38,000 --> 00:09:38,020 I'm sorry. 215 00:09:39,000 --> 00:09:40,010 Hey, no need to apologize. 216 00:09:40,012 --> 00:09:42,012 I wouldn't bring Brady here. 217 00:09:42,007 --> 00:09:44,997 Mommy needs two hands to eat her eight dollar cake. 218 00:09:45,006 --> 00:09:46,996 You're not gonna defend children? 219 00:09:47,003 --> 00:09:50,003 No, I don't like any children but my own. 220 00:09:50,004 --> 00:09:52,004 Look at that dirty little rug rat. 221 00:09:52,002 --> 00:09:55,012 That's just chocolate, all children are beautiful. 222 00:09:55,013 --> 00:09:58,013 But, not as beautiful as Brady. 223 00:09:58,015 --> 00:09:59,015 That's true. 224 00:09:59,019 --> 00:10:02,009 Hey, so how goes the big matrimonial move-in? 225 00:10:02,011 --> 00:10:03,011 Good. 226 00:10:03,007 --> 00:10:05,007 Harry's moved most of his stuff in, 227 00:10:05,016 --> 00:10:06,016 it's going well, 228 00:10:07,001 --> 00:10:10,021 and I'm just trying to learn to compromise because sometimes, 229 00:10:10,022 --> 00:10:12,012 I can be a little rigid. 230 00:10:12,009 --> 00:10:14,009 No! That's not true at all. 231 00:10:14,013 --> 00:10:17,003 There's just one thing and it's small but... 232 00:10:17,002 --> 00:10:19,012 it really grosses me out. 233 00:10:19,009 --> 00:10:20,999 We have a tea bag situation. 234 00:10:21,005 --> 00:10:22,005 Oh, I understand. 235 00:10:22,015 --> 00:10:25,005 Just breathe through your nose. 236 00:10:28,021 --> 00:10:30,011 When you're sucking his balls. 237 00:10:30,007 --> 00:10:31,017 What, no! 238 00:10:31,018 --> 00:10:32,018 I was talking about... 239 00:10:32,023 --> 00:10:35,023 Harry leaves his old tea bags around the house. 240 00:10:35,022 --> 00:10:38,012 Oh, I thought you meant "tea bagging." 241 00:10:38,010 --> 00:10:41,010 When you hold a guy's balls in your mouth. 242 00:10:41,007 --> 00:10:42,997 Why is it called... 243 00:10:43,004 --> 00:10:45,024 Oh, I get it, because they hang... 244 00:10:46,001 --> 00:10:48,001 -Shh! -...and the dipping. 245 00:10:48,002 --> 00:10:49,012 Oh, great. 246 00:10:49,008 --> 00:10:52,008 Now I've lost my shoes and my appetite. 247 00:10:52,010 --> 00:10:54,010 This is very good. 248 00:10:54,016 --> 00:10:56,016 You know what I love about living with you? 249 00:10:56,018 --> 00:10:59,008 Besides those nutty little soaps in the bathroom? 250 00:10:59,012 --> 00:11:01,012 -What? -Living with you. 251 00:11:06,001 --> 00:11:07,011 Honey... 252 00:11:08,006 --> 00:11:09,996 I need to talk to you. 253 00:11:10,005 --> 00:11:11,005 What's up, baby? 254 00:11:11,012 --> 00:11:14,022 I really don't mean to be a nag, but it's just-- 255 00:11:14,020 --> 00:11:17,010 Well, it's this. 256 00:11:18,010 --> 00:11:21,000 -Tea? -No, tea bags. 257 00:11:21,004 --> 00:11:24,014 You leave them all over the house and, well, they stain, 258 00:11:24,008 --> 00:11:26,018 and maybe you could just try to be a little more careful. 259 00:11:26,023 --> 00:11:28,023 Damn, I thought I was doing so well, too. 260 00:11:28,023 --> 00:11:29,023 What do you mean? 261 00:11:29,022 --> 00:11:31,012 Well, I've been really trying to watch my ass, 262 00:11:31,015 --> 00:11:32,995 you know, now that I'm living in your house. 263 00:11:33,003 --> 00:11:35,023 It's our house now, I want you to be yourself. 264 00:11:35,020 --> 00:11:39,010 Yeah, well, myself is pretty much a bull in a china shop. 265 00:11:39,007 --> 00:11:42,007 Well, then, you're a bull in our china shop. 266 00:11:45,019 --> 00:11:46,999 It's a bull. 267 00:11:47,004 --> 00:11:49,004 I get it. 268 00:11:49,005 --> 00:11:50,005 Just making sure. 269 00:11:50,008 --> 00:11:51,018 I get it. 270 00:11:57,001 --> 00:11:59,011 Hold it. Ho, ho. 271 00:12:00,016 --> 00:12:02,006 Hey, Yankee. 272 00:12:04,017 --> 00:12:05,017 Welcome to the building. 273 00:12:05,021 --> 00:12:08,021 I have a feeling you had a little something to do with that. 274 00:12:08,018 --> 00:12:11,018 Let's just say you owe me big time. 275 00:12:18,008 --> 00:12:20,008 You have a pock. 276 00:12:20,021 --> 00:12:22,011 What? 277 00:12:22,008 --> 00:12:23,018 On your face, right there. 278 00:12:23,019 --> 00:12:25,019 Oh my God. 279 00:12:25,020 --> 00:12:27,010 I must've gotten it from my kid. 280 00:12:27,016 --> 00:12:29,006 Oh, I thought you were single. 281 00:12:29,009 --> 00:12:31,009 I am. 282 00:12:31,014 --> 00:12:35,004 It was the perfect first conversation... 283 00:12:35,004 --> 00:12:36,024 minus the pock. 284 00:12:39,014 --> 00:12:43,004 Alright, give me the lotion and cotton balls, stat! 285 00:12:43,006 --> 00:12:44,996 You don't really say "stat." 286 00:12:45,005 --> 00:12:47,005 No, but it sounds good, doesn't it? 287 00:12:47,013 --> 00:12:50,003 Hey, so this is the little germ disseminator. 288 00:12:50,006 --> 00:12:51,016 Also known as Brady. 289 00:12:52,001 --> 00:12:53,011 Run while you're still breathing. 290 00:12:53,010 --> 00:12:55,020 No, no, it's okay, I had the chickenpox when I was four. 291 00:12:55,021 --> 00:12:57,011 Hey, where you going? 292 00:12:57,008 --> 00:13:00,008 Hi, hey there. Ch-ch-ch-ch... 293 00:13:01,004 --> 00:13:02,024 Hey, he's a winner. 294 00:13:02,021 --> 00:13:05,011 I really want one of these someday. 295 00:13:06,014 --> 00:13:07,024 You know, he looks just like you. 296 00:13:07,020 --> 00:13:09,010 -You think? -Oh, yeah. 297 00:13:11,016 --> 00:13:13,006 -Hey, sweetie pie. -Okay, mama, 298 00:13:15,002 --> 00:13:16,022 here we go. 299 00:13:16,019 --> 00:13:18,999 You know, I could do this myself. 300 00:13:19,003 --> 00:13:21,013 Yeah, but I'm a professional. 301 00:13:22,019 --> 00:13:26,009 Oh, Magda, this is Dr. Robert Leeds. 302 00:13:26,007 --> 00:13:28,007 -He's moving in upstairs. -Hi. 303 00:13:28,014 --> 00:13:30,024 Nice to meet you. 304 00:13:30,019 --> 00:13:32,009 I take baby for nap. 305 00:13:32,016 --> 00:13:33,016 Okay. 306 00:13:35,006 --> 00:13:37,016 Oh, hey, hey, you got another one. 307 00:13:41,001 --> 00:13:43,011 Okay, Ms. Hobbes, I think you'll live. 308 00:13:43,007 --> 00:13:45,997 -But no scratching, doctor's orders. -Okie-doke. 309 00:13:46,002 --> 00:13:50,002 For Miranda, Robert was just what the doctor ordered. 310 00:13:51,019 --> 00:13:53,009 Hey, Carrie, what a surprise! 311 00:13:53,012 --> 00:13:54,022 Well, I was in the neighborhood, 312 00:13:55,001 --> 00:13:56,021 I thought you might want these back. 313 00:13:56,023 --> 00:13:58,013 Oh, you didn't have to return these. 314 00:13:58,008 --> 00:13:59,018 I had forgotten all about them! 315 00:14:01,021 --> 00:14:03,011 Any news on my shoes? 316 00:14:03,016 --> 00:14:05,996 You know what, no, it's weird. 317 00:14:08,008 --> 00:14:11,998 So, this Jennifer, did you ever find her sandals? 318 00:14:12,002 --> 00:14:13,002 What? 319 00:14:13,004 --> 00:14:14,024 Well, if she took my shoes, 320 00:14:14,020 --> 00:14:16,020 she would have left her sandals. 321 00:14:16,018 --> 00:14:19,018 Just being a bit of a shoe detective here. 322 00:14:21,002 --> 00:14:23,002 I haven't heard from her. 323 00:14:24,004 --> 00:14:26,014 Oh. 324 00:14:26,010 --> 00:14:28,020 Oh, my gosh, Carrie, I am such a shit. 325 00:14:28,020 --> 00:14:30,020 I should have offered to pay you for them. 326 00:14:30,019 --> 00:14:32,009 No, no, you don't have to do that. 327 00:14:32,010 --> 00:14:36,010 You know, you have kids and you lose all sense of social decency. 328 00:14:36,011 --> 00:14:38,011 -Come in. -Okay. 329 00:14:48,017 --> 00:14:51,017 Milo, honey, put your trucks back for Mommy. 330 00:14:52,013 --> 00:14:53,023 Okay. 331 00:14:54,001 --> 00:14:56,021 So, um, how much were they? 332 00:14:56,018 --> 00:14:58,008 Uh, 485. 333 00:14:58,007 --> 00:15:02,007 C'mon, Carrie, that's insane! 334 00:15:02,008 --> 00:15:05,008 Well, that's what they cost. 335 00:15:06,011 --> 00:15:08,021 I'll give you $200. 336 00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:11,020 Okay, this is an awkward conversation. 337 00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:15,010 I'm sorry. I just think that's crazy to spend that much on shoes. 338 00:15:15,008 --> 00:15:16,998 You know how much Manolos are, 339 00:15:17,004 --> 00:15:18,014 you used to wear Manolos. 340 00:15:18,015 --> 00:15:20,995 Sure, before I had a real life. 341 00:15:21,004 --> 00:15:23,014 But Chuck and I have responsibilities now, 342 00:15:23,014 --> 00:15:25,014 kids, houses-- 343 00:15:25,010 --> 00:15:27,020 485, like, wow. 344 00:15:27,017 --> 00:15:30,007 -Hi, honey. 345 00:15:31,010 --> 00:15:33,000 I have a real life. 346 00:15:33,002 --> 00:15:35,022 No offense, Carrie, but I really don't think we should have to pay 347 00:15:35,022 --> 00:15:37,012 for your extravagant lifestyle. 348 00:15:37,007 --> 00:15:40,017 I mean, it was your choice to buy shoes that expensive. 349 00:15:40,017 --> 00:15:44,017 Yes, but it wasn't my choice to take them off. 350 00:15:44,021 --> 00:15:46,021 They're just shoes! 351 00:15:47,021 --> 00:15:49,011 Shoes. 352 00:15:51,001 --> 00:15:52,021 She shoe shamed me. 353 00:15:52,017 --> 00:15:54,017 I left there covered in shame. 354 00:15:54,022 --> 00:15:56,012 She's a fucking bitch. 355 00:15:56,011 --> 00:15:58,001 But she isn't, that's the thing. 356 00:15:58,004 --> 00:16:00,014 She's become this whole other person. 357 00:16:00,008 --> 00:16:04,008 It's like she's had two cesareans and a lobotomy. 358 00:16:04,011 --> 00:16:06,011 She owes you for those shoes. 359 00:16:06,010 --> 00:16:08,020 No, it's not about the money. I don't care about the money. 360 00:16:08,019 --> 00:16:12,019 I'm talking about a woman's right to shoes. 361 00:16:12,019 --> 00:16:14,009 Why did she have to shame me? 362 00:16:14,015 --> 00:16:18,015 Because she's trapped in a hell of her own making. 363 00:16:18,019 --> 00:16:20,019 No, wait, that's me. 364 00:16:21,023 --> 00:16:23,003 Ahh! 365 00:16:23,006 --> 00:16:25,016 I am dying to scratch these, 366 00:16:25,017 --> 00:16:27,007 but if I do, it'll be worse. 367 00:16:27,014 --> 00:16:28,024 How are they today? 368 00:16:29,008 --> 00:16:30,008 Biblical. 369 00:16:30,012 --> 00:16:33,012 There is literally a pox on my house. 370 00:16:33,012 --> 00:16:35,012 If there wasn't a Jules and Mimi marathon 371 00:16:35,010 --> 00:16:39,000 on BBC America this weekend, I'd have jumped out the window. 372 00:16:39,005 --> 00:16:41,005 Hey, speaking of handsome black men... 373 00:16:41,014 --> 00:16:44,014 Have you spotted any more of Dr. Knicks? 374 00:16:44,008 --> 00:16:45,998 Don't say spot. 375 00:16:46,004 --> 00:16:48,024 No, as a leper, I'm laying low. 376 00:16:48,017 --> 00:16:51,007 But according to my sources, he's officially in the building. 377 00:16:51,016 --> 00:16:54,006 Hey, is it bad that my life is filled with shoes 378 00:16:54,009 --> 00:16:56,009 -and not children? Stop it! 379 00:16:56,007 --> 00:16:59,017 And she is a fucking bitch for making you feel this way. 380 00:17:00,012 --> 00:17:01,022 Oh, God. 381 00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:04,020 When we were young, Marlo Thomas sang to us 382 00:17:04,019 --> 00:17:07,019 about accepting each other and our differences. 383 00:17:08,015 --> 00:17:09,995 But then we got older, 384 00:17:10,002 --> 00:17:11,022 and started singing a different tune. 385 00:17:11,021 --> 00:17:14,011 We stopped celebrating each other's life choices 386 00:17:14,011 --> 00:17:16,011 and started qualifying them. 387 00:17:16,011 --> 00:17:19,021 Is acceptance really such a childish concept? 388 00:17:19,019 --> 00:17:21,999 Or did we have it right all along? 389 00:17:23,017 --> 00:17:26,997 When did we stop being free to be you and me? 390 00:17:29,021 --> 00:17:30,021 The next morning, 391 00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:33,020 Charlotte learned just how free the real Harry could be. 392 00:17:33,021 --> 00:17:38,001 ♪ Oh, the shark has Pretty teeth, dear ♪ 393 00:17:38,005 --> 00:17:40,995 ♪ And he shows them ♪ Huh, huh, huh? 394 00:17:41,003 --> 00:17:44,013 ♪ Pearly white Da-da da-da-da ♪ 395 00:17:44,016 --> 00:17:46,006 -Morning! -Hi. 396 00:17:46,015 --> 00:17:49,995 ♪ Ba da ba ba... ♪ 397 00:17:50,003 --> 00:17:52,003 Are-- are you going to take a shower? 398 00:17:52,004 --> 00:17:53,024 In a little while. 399 00:18:00,018 --> 00:18:03,008 Some people are said to have ice in their veins. 400 00:18:03,007 --> 00:18:05,997 -For John Snyder, it seems to be ice cream. 401 00:18:06,006 --> 00:18:11,006 The thirty-nine-year-old is the founder of Il Laboratorio Del Gelato shop 402 00:18:11,009 --> 00:18:13,009 on Manhattan's Lower East Side. 403 00:18:15,011 --> 00:18:17,021 Apparently, it took next to nothing 404 00:18:17,020 --> 00:18:19,020 to make Harry feel comfortable. 405 00:18:24,014 --> 00:18:26,024 Charlotte felt completely trapped. 406 00:18:26,021 --> 00:18:29,021 She wanted to see Harry be himself in her home... 407 00:18:31,005 --> 00:18:33,995 She just didn't need to see that much of him. 408 00:18:37,003 --> 00:18:40,013 Meanwhile, I decided to bare all to Kyra. 409 00:18:42,021 --> 00:18:44,021 -♪ Clean it up ♪ -Hello? 410 00:18:44,021 --> 00:18:47,001 Hey! Kyra, it's Carrie. 411 00:18:47,006 --> 00:18:51,006 Listen, I feel weird about what happened the other day. 412 00:18:51,009 --> 00:18:54,009 We've been friends a really long time and... 413 00:18:54,011 --> 00:18:56,011 I just-- I want to clear the air. 414 00:18:56,015 --> 00:18:59,005 Oh my God, Carrie, I had forgotten about that days ago. 415 00:18:59,007 --> 00:19:00,007 ♪ Clean it up ♪ 416 00:19:00,011 --> 00:19:03,011 Well, I didn't, I've been thinking a lot about it and-- 417 00:19:03,014 --> 00:19:06,014 Man, you must have a lot of time on your hands. 418 00:19:06,012 --> 00:19:07,012 Milo! 419 00:19:07,010 --> 00:19:09,010 Pants stay on, I'm serious! 420 00:19:09,012 --> 00:19:11,022 Penises stay in the bathroom! Carrie, 421 00:19:11,017 --> 00:19:14,007 can you hold on for one second? I'll be right back, thanks. 422 00:19:18,001 --> 00:19:19,001 Hello? 423 00:19:20,006 --> 00:19:22,006 Hello, Santa? 424 00:19:26,018 --> 00:19:27,018 You know what? 425 00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,010 I am Santa. 426 00:19:29,008 --> 00:19:30,998 I did a little mental addition, 427 00:19:31,002 --> 00:19:33,002 and over the years I have bought Kyra 428 00:19:33,003 --> 00:19:35,003 an engagement gift, a wedding gift, 429 00:19:35,004 --> 00:19:37,014 then there was the trip to Maine for the wedding, 430 00:19:37,012 --> 00:19:38,022 three baby gifts... 431 00:19:38,018 --> 00:19:43,008 In toto, I have spent over $2,300 432 00:19:43,009 --> 00:19:45,009 celebrating her choices. 433 00:19:45,011 --> 00:19:47,011 And she is shaming me for spending 434 00:19:47,012 --> 00:19:51,002 a lousy 485 bucks on myself? 435 00:19:51,023 --> 00:19:53,013 Yes, I did the math. 436 00:19:53,016 --> 00:19:54,996 But those were gifts. 437 00:19:55,003 --> 00:19:57,013 I mean, if you got married or had a child, 438 00:19:57,008 --> 00:19:59,008 she would spend the same on you. 439 00:19:59,016 --> 00:20:02,006 And if I don't ever get married or have a baby... 440 00:20:02,015 --> 00:20:04,015 What, I get bupkis? 441 00:20:04,017 --> 00:20:05,017 Think about it. 442 00:20:05,023 --> 00:20:07,013 If you are single, after graduation, 443 00:20:07,016 --> 00:20:11,006 there isn't one occasion where people celebrate you. 444 00:20:11,012 --> 00:20:12,012 We have birthdays. 445 00:20:12,013 --> 00:20:15,013 Oh, no, no, no, no, we all have birthdays. 446 00:20:15,013 --> 00:20:16,013 That's a wash. 447 00:20:16,010 --> 00:20:19,010 I am talking about the single gal. 448 00:20:19,016 --> 00:20:20,996 Hallmark doesn't make a, uh... 449 00:20:21,005 --> 00:20:25,015 "Congratulations you didn't marry the wrong guy" card. 450 00:20:25,019 --> 00:20:29,009 And where is the flatware for going on vacation alone? 451 00:20:29,015 --> 00:20:31,005 -You're right. -Uh-huh. 452 00:20:31,009 --> 00:20:32,999 Why should I get wedding gifts? 453 00:20:33,003 --> 00:20:34,023 Finding Harry was gift enough. 454 00:20:34,020 --> 00:20:35,020 No, no, no, no. 455 00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:39,000 I'm thrilled to give you gifts to celebrate your life. 456 00:20:39,005 --> 00:20:41,005 I just think it stinks that single people 457 00:20:41,012 --> 00:20:42,012 are left out of it. 458 00:20:42,014 --> 00:20:44,014 So, the moral of the story appears to be, 459 00:20:44,015 --> 00:20:48,005 until I get married, I won't be seeing nothing from Kyra. 460 00:20:48,008 --> 00:20:49,018 -Oh. -How's the pistachio? 461 00:20:50,000 --> 00:20:52,000 -It's so good, you want some? -Is it? Yeah. 462 00:20:52,003 --> 00:20:56,003 Meanwhile, Samantha was trying to have a working lunch. 463 00:20:58,022 --> 00:21:00,012 Yeah, we got cut off. 464 00:21:00,009 --> 00:21:02,999 Look, I need to get him three VIP seats and-- 465 00:21:03,005 --> 00:21:04,015 Look at you! 466 00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:07,010 Look at you eating your pesto! 467 00:21:07,009 --> 00:21:08,019 Ooh. 468 00:21:10,019 --> 00:21:12,999 No, I don't want any shitty house seats. 469 00:21:13,006 --> 00:21:15,006 -Listen to me... Who's a big boy? 470 00:21:15,013 --> 00:21:16,023 No, I can't have any-- 471 00:21:16,023 --> 00:21:19,013 Excuse me, we don't allow cell phones. 472 00:21:19,008 --> 00:21:20,008 Are you kidding me? 473 00:21:20,015 --> 00:21:23,015 -No. -I'll call you back. 474 00:21:23,023 --> 00:21:26,023 I understand that my cell phone may be annoying to some, 475 00:21:26,023 --> 00:21:29,013 but what are you doing about that noise? 476 00:21:33,013 --> 00:21:35,013 There's nothing we can do about that. 477 00:21:35,015 --> 00:21:37,015 That's a child. 478 00:21:37,018 --> 00:21:40,998 And that was all Samantha had to hear. 479 00:21:44,011 --> 00:21:45,021 Hello. 480 00:21:46,001 --> 00:21:47,021 I understand that your child and I 481 00:21:47,020 --> 00:21:49,010 have to coexist in this city, 482 00:21:49,013 --> 00:21:51,023 but perhaps you could take him somewhere more appropriate 483 00:21:51,023 --> 00:21:56,013 for a happy meal, so I could have a happier one-- 484 00:21:56,009 --> 00:22:00,999 Seamus, that wasn't very nice. 485 00:22:01,006 --> 00:22:06,016 Well, I've made my point, and he's made his. 486 00:22:08,015 --> 00:22:14,995 If you see a monster that's smart... That is real! 487 00:22:15,006 --> 00:22:16,006 And it's... 488 00:22:17,006 --> 00:22:18,016 Honey! 489 00:22:20,004 --> 00:22:22,004 Honey? 490 00:22:22,005 --> 00:22:24,005 Hello, beautiful. 491 00:22:24,014 --> 00:22:25,024 Hi. 492 00:22:26,000 --> 00:22:29,010 Do you know what we need to bring back in this house? 493 00:22:29,012 --> 00:22:31,002 Cocktail hour. 494 00:22:33,002 --> 00:22:35,012 Charlotte realized there was something grosser 495 00:22:35,013 --> 00:22:37,003 than tea bags all over her house... 496 00:22:39,003 --> 00:22:42,013 Her husband's tea bags all over her new white couch. 497 00:22:42,010 --> 00:22:43,010 Harry! 498 00:22:43,008 --> 00:22:45,008 What? 499 00:22:45,011 --> 00:22:48,001 No I-- I feel bad. 500 00:22:48,003 --> 00:22:49,013 About what? 501 00:22:50,011 --> 00:22:51,021 Well, I'm trying to be less rigid 502 00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:54,020 and I really do want you to be yourself in our house. 503 00:22:54,021 --> 00:22:57,001 I know you do, and I appreciate it. 504 00:22:57,004 --> 00:23:01,014 And... I'm almost used to the whole... 505 00:23:01,009 --> 00:23:02,019 naked thing. 506 00:23:02,020 --> 00:23:05,010 Ah, I knew it was too much. 507 00:23:05,013 --> 00:23:06,013 It's just me. 508 00:23:06,012 --> 00:23:08,002 But I can put on clothes... 509 00:23:08,002 --> 00:23:09,022 No. 510 00:23:09,021 --> 00:23:12,021 I want you to be yourself, it's just... 511 00:23:13,001 --> 00:23:15,021 maybe you could put something between yourself 512 00:23:15,019 --> 00:23:16,999 and the white couch. 513 00:23:17,005 --> 00:23:18,005 Oh, I get it. 514 00:23:18,013 --> 00:23:21,013 We've got kind of an ass, white couch situation here. 515 00:23:21,014 --> 00:23:23,014 I will put on shorts. 516 00:23:23,012 --> 00:23:24,022 Could you? 517 00:23:24,020 --> 00:23:25,020 Of course. 518 00:23:25,023 --> 00:23:27,003 Oh. 519 00:23:31,014 --> 00:23:32,024 Now? 520 00:23:37,015 --> 00:23:38,015 Love you! 521 00:23:57,002 --> 00:23:58,022 Miranda, you in there? 522 00:24:00,007 --> 00:24:02,007 I can see your feet under the door. 523 00:24:03,007 --> 00:24:03,997 Damn. 524 00:24:04,006 --> 00:24:05,996 Come on, I just came by to check up on you. 525 00:24:06,005 --> 00:24:07,005 I'm fine. 526 00:24:07,010 --> 00:24:10,010 Hey, I've seen it all, I'm a doctor, remember? 527 00:24:14,013 --> 00:24:15,023 I'm fine. 528 00:24:16,001 --> 00:24:17,011 Come on in. 529 00:24:18,010 --> 00:24:20,000 Oh, it's not that bad. 530 00:24:20,006 --> 00:24:22,006 Hey, I've seen a seven-foot-tall man's shin bone 531 00:24:22,011 --> 00:24:24,021 poking through his calf, so... 532 00:24:25,001 --> 00:24:26,011 Hey, where's Brady? 533 00:24:26,007 --> 00:24:27,017 Oh, he's asleep. 534 00:24:27,021 --> 00:24:29,011 Oh, that's too bad. I wanted to give him this. 535 00:24:29,015 --> 00:24:33,005 Oh, I'm pretty sure his hand-eye coordination 536 00:24:33,009 --> 00:24:35,019 is still a little sub-par to make the team. 537 00:24:35,018 --> 00:24:38,008 Hey, if he's gonna go pro, you gotta start him young. 538 00:24:38,011 --> 00:24:39,011 What are you watching? 539 00:24:39,012 --> 00:24:42,002 Oh, it's just Jules and Mimi. 540 00:24:42,005 --> 00:24:45,015 -It's silly. -Yeah, what's it about? 541 00:24:45,017 --> 00:24:48,017 Well, that's Mimi, she's the landlord, 542 00:24:48,019 --> 00:24:51,009 and right next to her there is Jules, 543 00:24:51,015 --> 00:24:53,015 and they've slept together a couple of times, 544 00:24:53,021 --> 00:24:55,021 but Jules may be involved with the girl 545 00:24:55,018 --> 00:24:57,998 -who works in the sausage shop. -Mmm. 546 00:24:58,002 --> 00:24:58,022 In a nutshell. 547 00:24:58,023 --> 00:25:00,023 Well, he seems to be pretty into her now. 548 00:25:00,019 --> 00:25:01,019 Yeah. 549 00:25:01,019 --> 00:25:03,009 I'm intrigued. 550 00:25:04,020 --> 00:25:05,020 Really? 551 00:25:05,019 --> 00:25:07,019 That and my cable's not hooked up yet. 552 00:25:14,005 --> 00:25:15,015 Jules... 553 00:25:15,021 --> 00:25:19,011 You know, you didn't have to bring the rent over in person. 554 00:25:19,008 --> 00:25:21,008 What's a few tube stops between friends, eh? 555 00:25:21,013 --> 00:25:23,023 I love a brother with an accent. 556 00:25:23,023 --> 00:25:26,013 Do you think we'll stay friends after this? 557 00:25:26,012 --> 00:25:28,002 I hope not. 558 00:25:41,018 --> 00:25:46,018 Oh, Mimi, you're so soft. 559 00:25:50,008 --> 00:25:53,998 That night, I decided I couldn't wait for a ring. 560 00:25:54,002 --> 00:25:56,022 And so, I gave someone else one. 561 00:26:00,004 --> 00:26:01,024 This is Milo... 562 00:26:01,022 --> 00:26:02,022 This is Allegra. 563 00:26:03,001 --> 00:26:05,021 Mommy and Daddy and baby Henry 564 00:26:05,017 --> 00:26:07,007 and us aren't here. 565 00:26:07,015 --> 00:26:10,005 Leave a message! 566 00:26:11,013 --> 00:26:14,003 Hi, it's Carrie Bradshaw. 567 00:26:14,002 --> 00:26:18,012 I wanted to let you know that I'm getting married... 568 00:26:18,010 --> 00:26:19,020 to myself. 569 00:26:19,017 --> 00:26:22,017 Oh, and I'm registered at Manolo Blahnik. 570 00:26:22,020 --> 00:26:25,010 So thanks, bye. 571 00:26:27,000 --> 00:26:28,010 One giant step for me. 572 00:26:28,016 --> 00:26:31,016 One small step for single womankind. 573 00:26:35,014 --> 00:26:37,014 Here they are. 574 00:26:37,014 --> 00:26:39,004 That's all she registered for? 575 00:26:39,002 --> 00:26:40,012 Uh-huh. That'll be... 576 00:26:40,014 --> 00:26:43,024 485, yeah. 577 00:26:43,018 --> 00:26:45,008 Plus tax. 578 00:26:45,011 --> 00:26:47,011 And could you please watch your children? 579 00:26:47,016 --> 00:26:50,016 We don't want them touching the shoes, thanks. 580 00:27:17,019 --> 00:27:20,009 It was my very first wedding present. 581 00:27:22,016 --> 00:27:23,016 The fact is, 582 00:27:23,023 --> 00:27:26,023 sometimes it's hard to walk in a single woman's shoes... 583 00:27:26,020 --> 00:27:30,010 That's why we need really special ones now and then 584 00:27:30,010 --> 00:27:33,000 to make the walk a little more fun.