1
00:00:51,017 --> 00:00:53,017
I didn't go to
my high school reunion.
2
00:00:53,021 --> 00:00:57,001
So when my high school
sweetheart called me
for a reunion,
3
00:00:57,003 --> 00:00:59,013
I was curious to see
if he looked like the boy
4
00:00:59,009 --> 00:01:01,019
I used to make out with
in front of my locker.
5
00:01:01,017 --> 00:01:03,997
Excuse me, can you tell me how
to get to chemistry class?
6
00:01:04,005 --> 00:01:06,005
Actually,
he looked better.
7
00:01:06,013 --> 00:01:10,023
Oh, my God.
Jeremy! Wow.
8
00:01:10,023 --> 00:01:12,023
That's my name,
don't wear it out.
9
00:01:12,019 --> 00:01:15,999
Oh, wow. You look great.
10
00:01:16,003 --> 00:01:18,013
I knew you looked great,
'cause I saw you
on the cover of your book.
11
00:01:18,015 --> 00:01:19,005
Oh...
12
00:01:19,016 --> 00:01:20,996
But I have to say,
even better in person.
13
00:01:21,004 --> 00:01:23,014
Oh, God, I'm so glad you called.
14
00:01:23,011 --> 00:01:26,001
I'm gonna be spending
the month in Connecticut so...
15
00:01:26,005 --> 00:01:27,005
I had to look you up.
16
00:01:27,010 --> 00:01:29,000
Wow.
Well, how are you?
17
00:01:29,005 --> 00:01:30,005
I heard that
you married somebody
18
00:01:30,012 --> 00:01:31,022
that you met in business school.
19
00:01:31,018 --> 00:01:34,008
Yeah, no, I got divorced,
like, two years ago.
20
00:01:34,013 --> 00:01:37,003
Really miscalculated that one.
21
00:01:37,006 --> 00:01:38,016
So, I'm on my own again.
22
00:01:38,021 --> 00:01:40,011
Oh. Oh.
23
00:01:40,010 --> 00:01:41,010
How about you?
24
00:01:41,014 --> 00:01:43,014
Are you seeing anybody, or...
25
00:01:43,010 --> 00:01:44,010
Nope.
26
00:01:44,011 --> 00:01:46,011
-Wide open.
-How is that possible?
27
00:01:46,013 --> 00:01:49,013
Well, my high school boyfriend
spoiled me for life.
28
00:01:49,016 --> 00:01:51,996
Right, me and my AMC Pacer.
29
00:01:52,004 --> 00:01:56,004
Oh, the Pacer!
Oh, man.
30
00:01:56,004 --> 00:01:58,024
I put our names down
for a table...
31
00:01:58,019 --> 00:01:59,019
Oh, great.
32
00:01:59,017 --> 00:02:00,997
But earlier you said maybe
33
00:02:01,002 --> 00:02:03,012
-you might have dinner plans.
-Oh.
34
00:02:03,008 --> 00:02:05,008
Was that in case
I turned out to be a...
35
00:02:06,014 --> 00:02:07,024
Yeah, maybe.
36
00:02:08,001 --> 00:02:14,021
But um, my fictional plans
fell through, so I'm available.
37
00:02:14,023 --> 00:02:17,003
-Miranda had no plans that
night,
38
00:02:17,003 --> 00:02:19,003
so she was thrilled
when her cute new neighbor
39
00:02:19,003 --> 00:02:20,003
stopped by.
40
00:02:20,002 --> 00:02:22,022
-Hey!
-Oh, hey.
41
00:02:22,020 --> 00:02:24,010
I didn't think you'd be home
on a Saturday night.
42
00:02:24,016 --> 00:02:25,016
Motherhood.
43
00:02:27,002 --> 00:02:28,022
So what's my excuse?
44
00:02:28,020 --> 00:02:31,010
I just got Brady to sleep.
45
00:02:31,014 --> 00:02:33,004
Now, do you sing to him?
46
00:02:33,002 --> 00:02:34,012
Only if he's been bad.
47
00:02:36,010 --> 00:02:39,000
So, listen, I, um,
I have these two courtside seats
48
00:02:39,006 --> 00:02:39,996
for the Knicks' charity game
49
00:02:40,004 --> 00:02:42,004
at The Garden next Friday night.
50
00:02:42,004 --> 00:02:43,004
Would you want to go?
51
00:02:43,006 --> 00:02:44,016
I would love to.
52
00:02:44,022 --> 00:02:46,012
Great.
53
00:02:47,015 --> 00:02:48,995
Great, I'll look for you there.
54
00:02:49,003 --> 00:02:53,013
Oh, okay.
Thanks so much.
55
00:02:54,003 --> 00:02:55,003
Goodnight.
56
00:02:56,002 --> 00:02:57,012
You too.
57
00:02:57,016 --> 00:03:00,006
Miranda wasn't sure
if it was a charity game,
58
00:03:00,008 --> 00:03:02,018
or just charity.
59
00:03:02,018 --> 00:03:05,998
Hey, I didn't even ask what
you were doing in Connecticut.
60
00:03:06,003 --> 00:03:08,013
Nothing... well, for a change.
61
00:03:08,016 --> 00:03:12,016
I spent the last decade
working my ass off in Denver,
62
00:03:12,019 --> 00:03:15,019
so I decided
to take a month off,
63
00:03:15,023 --> 00:03:17,023
and spend some time
at sea-level.
64
00:03:17,018 --> 00:03:19,998
So I've just been relaxing
in the country,
65
00:03:20,003 --> 00:03:21,023
sorting through
some things, you know.
66
00:03:21,019 --> 00:03:24,009
Yeah, sometimes
you need to get away.
67
00:03:26,015 --> 00:03:29,005
Sometimes you wonder
why you stayed away so long.
68
00:03:35,002 --> 00:03:36,002
Well...
69
00:03:36,006 --> 00:03:36,996
Ah.
70
00:03:37,004 --> 00:03:38,014
This is my place.
71
00:03:40,010 --> 00:03:41,020
It's a nice place.
72
00:03:41,018 --> 00:03:42,018
Yeah.
73
00:03:42,022 --> 00:03:44,002
I love it here.
74
00:03:46,021 --> 00:03:49,021
I, I feel like I want
to kiss you, but I, I...
75
00:03:51,006 --> 00:03:52,016
I don't know what...
76
00:03:52,017 --> 00:03:54,007
I know, it's very unclear.
77
00:03:54,010 --> 00:03:56,010
Yeah, I mean,
this isn't a first date.
78
00:03:56,007 --> 00:03:57,017
We've, we've already dated.
79
00:03:58,000 --> 00:03:58,020
And we've kissed.
80
00:03:59,001 --> 00:04:00,011
-Many times.
-Hours.
81
00:04:00,013 --> 00:04:03,013
We were in a lip lock
for most of 1982.
82
00:04:04,014 --> 00:04:05,024
So, um...
83
00:04:07,014 --> 00:04:08,024
What's one more kiss?
84
00:04:12,022 --> 00:04:14,002
Uh-oh...
85
00:04:14,005 --> 00:04:15,005
You mean business.
86
00:04:32,016 --> 00:04:35,996
So... that's a lot better
without the gearshift
87
00:04:36,005 --> 00:04:37,015
sticking up my ass.
88
00:04:41,013 --> 00:04:45,023
It was a romantic,
hot summer night...
89
00:04:45,019 --> 00:04:48,019
Followed by a miserable,
hot summer day,
90
00:04:48,019 --> 00:04:52,009
which was the 14th miserable,
hot summer day in a row.
91
00:04:52,010 --> 00:04:53,020
Samantha Jones!
92
00:04:53,020 --> 00:04:55,000
How are you?
93
00:04:55,002 --> 00:04:57,012
Great, Phoebe! How are you?
94
00:04:58,007 --> 00:04:59,007
Refreshed.
95
00:04:59,013 --> 00:05:01,023
We just dropped by
the Soho House for a dip.
96
00:05:01,019 --> 00:05:04,019
I mean, what else can you
possibly do in this heat
97
00:05:05,000 --> 00:05:08,000
except sit by the pool
and drink cocktails
98
00:05:08,002 --> 00:05:10,002
while they mist you with Evian?
99
00:05:10,005 --> 00:05:11,005
Isn't it the best?
100
00:05:11,010 --> 00:05:12,020
Oh, it's fabulous.
101
00:05:12,022 --> 00:05:16,002
I'm running to a lunch,
otherwise I'd be
up there myself.
102
00:05:16,015 --> 00:05:17,015
Toodles.
103
00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:21,010
There's a pool a block from my
apartment and I can't get in!
104
00:05:21,007 --> 00:05:22,997
-What pool?
-At the Soho House.
105
00:05:23,002 --> 00:05:24,002
You have to be a member
106
00:05:24,006 --> 00:05:26,006
and I'm on some kind
of bullshit waitlist.
107
00:05:26,013 --> 00:05:27,013
Don't they know who you are?
108
00:05:27,015 --> 00:05:29,015
And more importantly,
who we are,
109
00:05:30,000 --> 00:05:32,000
who need to be
at the pool with you?
110
00:05:32,005 --> 00:05:33,005
You know, in high school,
111
00:05:33,009 --> 00:05:34,999
all you had to do
was jump a fence
112
00:05:35,005 --> 00:05:37,005
and you could be
in somebody's pool.
113
00:05:37,011 --> 00:05:38,021
Oh, speaking of high school,
114
00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:41,010
I saw my high school sweetheart
115
00:05:41,008 --> 00:05:43,998
and I think I might like him...
116
00:05:44,006 --> 00:05:45,006
again.
117
00:05:45,013 --> 00:05:46,013
Is that crazy?
118
00:05:46,016 --> 00:05:48,006
No, I love this!
119
00:05:48,012 --> 00:05:51,002
You could end up with
your high school boyfriend!
120
00:05:51,003 --> 00:05:52,013
Okay, let's not jump the gun.
121
00:05:52,010 --> 00:05:55,000
But it was the best date
that I've had in a long time.
122
00:05:55,002 --> 00:05:56,022
And I wasn't even thinking
that it was a date.
123
00:05:56,022 --> 00:05:59,012
Oh, and when
he kissed me goodnight--
124
00:05:59,009 --> 00:06:01,019
He kissed you goodnight?
125
00:06:02,001 --> 00:06:06,011
I-- It was wild because
I actually remembered
126
00:06:06,009 --> 00:06:08,009
what it felt like to kiss him.
127
00:06:08,007 --> 00:06:09,017
Imagine if you slept with him.
128
00:06:09,023 --> 00:06:11,023
Talk about a homecoming.
129
00:06:11,021 --> 00:06:13,011
No!
130
00:06:13,008 --> 00:06:15,008
-We never went all the way.
-Why not?
131
00:06:15,008 --> 00:06:17,998
Because we were kids.
We wanted to wait.
132
00:06:18,005 --> 00:06:19,005
And now...
133
00:06:19,012 --> 00:06:21,012
I think we've waited
long enough.
134
00:06:21,010 --> 00:06:24,000
-You're marrying him.
-Will you stop?
135
00:06:24,004 --> 00:06:26,004
He doesn't even live
in New York.
He lives in Denver.
136
00:06:26,006 --> 00:06:28,996
People move.
It would be so romantic.
137
00:06:29,005 --> 00:06:32,015
Or tragic.
Seriously, if I had
the guy in high school,
138
00:06:33,001 --> 00:06:36,001
what have I been doing
for the past 20 years?
139
00:06:36,002 --> 00:06:37,022
Why did you two break up?
140
00:06:37,018 --> 00:06:39,018
I broke up because I thought,
come on,
141
00:06:39,022 --> 00:06:41,012
there must be
better guys out there.
142
00:06:41,010 --> 00:06:44,010
Turns out, ah, there aren't!
143
00:06:44,010 --> 00:06:48,010
That night I started thinking
about my retro relationship.
144
00:06:48,007 --> 00:06:50,007
Since high school,
most women I know
145
00:06:50,008 --> 00:06:52,018
have acquired much
better taste in clothes,
146
00:06:52,017 --> 00:06:54,007
hair styles, and food.
147
00:06:54,008 --> 00:06:55,998
But what about in men?
148
00:06:59,005 --> 00:07:03,995
Maybe we were better off
when we thought less
and kissed more.
149
00:07:04,003 --> 00:07:07,023
Have we graduated past
our ability to find true love
150
00:07:07,022 --> 00:07:10,012
when it comes to matters
of the heart?
151
00:07:10,015 --> 00:07:12,995
Did we have it right
in high school?
152
00:07:15,018 --> 00:07:19,008
Samantha was too cool to belong
to any clubs in high school,
153
00:07:19,007 --> 00:07:21,007
so she refused
to believe that any club
154
00:07:21,008 --> 00:07:22,018
was too cool for her now...
155
00:07:22,019 --> 00:07:26,019
especially since New York
in August is not cool at all.
156
00:07:26,017 --> 00:07:28,007
-May I help you?
-I hope so.
157
00:07:28,010 --> 00:07:30,020
I'd like to know what's
holding up my membership.
158
00:07:31,001 --> 00:07:32,021
I've been on the waitlist
since June.
159
00:07:32,021 --> 00:07:36,001
Yes, I'm sorry,
but we are not currently
admitting any new members.
160
00:07:36,006 --> 00:07:39,016
The pool is so fabulous,
we're at capacity every day.
161
00:07:41,020 --> 00:07:43,020
Do you know who I am?
162
00:07:43,022 --> 00:07:48,022
No, I don't, but we can't
accommodate you right now.
163
00:07:48,021 --> 00:07:51,011
Can I at least use
the restroom before I go,
164
00:07:51,009 --> 00:07:53,009
or is there a waitlist
for that as well?
165
00:07:53,011 --> 00:07:55,001
Down the corridor on your left.
166
00:07:55,006 --> 00:07:57,006
The door marked "W.C."
167
00:08:06,018 --> 00:08:09,018
Miss, did you leave
your card on the sink?
168
00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:12,000
Oh, yes.
169
00:08:12,002 --> 00:08:14,022
Yes, I did.
Thank you so much.
170
00:08:14,021 --> 00:08:18,011
Since they didn't seem
to know who she was
at the Soho House,
171
00:08:18,013 --> 00:08:19,023
she figured she could be...
172
00:08:20,001 --> 00:08:22,011
Annabelle Bronstein.
173
00:08:28,022 --> 00:08:32,022
The next day, Samantha tested
the waters with her fake ID.
174
00:08:33,012 --> 00:08:34,012
Excuse me.
175
00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:38,000
Can I get you something
to drink, Miss Bronstein?
176
00:08:39,004 --> 00:08:42,004
Yes, but I'll just pay cash.
177
00:08:43,011 --> 00:08:47,021
And please, call me Annabelle.
178
00:08:47,017 --> 00:08:51,007
Meanwhile, a fight
was about to break out
in the cafeteria,
179
00:08:51,015 --> 00:08:56,005
but this time, Cafeteria was
a trendy restaurant in Chelsea.
180
00:08:57,015 --> 00:08:59,005
Thank you.
181
00:08:59,007 --> 00:09:01,007
God, I hate him.
182
00:09:01,015 --> 00:09:03,015
Come on, we're going over there.
183
00:09:03,017 --> 00:09:04,007
Why?
184
00:09:04,015 --> 00:09:06,005
Because you're in a tank top.
185
00:09:08,002 --> 00:09:09,012
Hi!
186
00:09:09,010 --> 00:09:10,010
Oh, hi.
187
00:09:10,009 --> 00:09:12,009
You were here,
what a small world!
188
00:09:12,008 --> 00:09:16,008
That's Chelsea for you.
Can't swing a dick without
running into someone you know.
189
00:09:18,021 --> 00:09:20,011
Well, we'd love
to stay and chat,
190
00:09:20,013 --> 00:09:23,003
but we have to go get our tuxes
for the prom.
191
00:09:23,002 --> 00:09:24,012
Did you say, "the prom"?
192
00:09:24,013 --> 00:09:29,013
Yes, it's a big fund-raiser
at the gay, lesbian,
bi, transgender center.
193
00:09:29,012 --> 00:09:31,012
I'm on
the decorations committee.
194
00:09:31,011 --> 00:09:33,011
What's the theme?
Queer and queerer?
195
00:09:35,007 --> 00:09:37,007
I have the best memories
of my prom.
196
00:09:37,016 --> 00:09:38,016
I was the prom queen.
197
00:09:39,001 --> 00:09:41,011
Of course you were, darling.
198
00:09:41,007 --> 00:09:43,017
I missed my prom
in high school because--
199
00:09:44,001 --> 00:09:45,021
You were gay?
200
00:09:45,021 --> 00:09:49,011
No, my girlfriend and I broke up
the night before because--
201
00:09:49,011 --> 00:09:51,011
You were gay.
202
00:09:52,002 --> 00:09:53,022
No, I wasn't gay until--
203
00:09:53,022 --> 00:09:55,012
You were born?
204
00:09:57,007 --> 00:09:58,017
Never mind.
205
00:09:58,022 --> 00:09:59,022
Goodbye...
206
00:09:59,020 --> 00:10:01,010
Charlotte.
207
00:10:01,014 --> 00:10:03,014
-Bye.
-Bye, Marcus.
208
00:10:06,006 --> 00:10:10,006
Those two should be going
to the gay, lesbian
and prostitute prom.
209
00:10:10,009 --> 00:10:11,019
Oh, be nice.
210
00:10:11,020 --> 00:10:15,020
What?
I happen to know that Marcus
used to be a gay escort.
211
00:10:16,001 --> 00:10:17,011
He was not!
212
00:10:17,007 --> 00:10:19,017
Oh, honey, wake up
and smell the K-Y.
213
00:10:19,017 --> 00:10:22,007
I was flipping through
a vintage issue of Honcho.
214
00:10:22,008 --> 00:10:24,008
I saw his ad
in the Rauncho section.
215
00:10:24,010 --> 00:10:26,000
He called himself Paul.
216
00:10:26,006 --> 00:10:28,016
Worst hustler name I ever heard.
217
00:10:28,018 --> 00:10:30,008
He and Stanford are in love.
218
00:10:30,015 --> 00:10:32,005
Yeah, well, according to Honcho,
219
00:10:32,013 --> 00:10:34,023
he used to be
in love all over town.
220
00:10:34,022 --> 00:10:36,002
You are mistaken.
221
00:10:36,004 --> 00:10:38,014
There's a picture.
I'll send you the ad.
222
00:10:38,007 --> 00:10:39,017
I don't want to see it!
223
00:10:39,023 --> 00:10:41,013
I'm sendin' it, prom queen!
224
00:10:41,007 --> 00:10:42,007
What can I get you?
225
00:10:42,010 --> 00:10:43,020
Cute waiter.
226
00:10:46,020 --> 00:10:48,020
I wish I didn't know this.
227
00:10:49,001 --> 00:10:52,011
Number Five, Fishman,
replaces Ellis.
228
00:10:52,015 --> 00:10:53,995
Do you think Stanford knows?
229
00:10:54,002 --> 00:10:56,012
Probably not, so maybe
we shouldn't talk about it
230
00:10:56,009 --> 00:10:57,999
in Madison Square Garden.
231
00:11:00,014 --> 00:11:03,024
I don't think that these people
know those people.
232
00:11:05,002 --> 00:11:06,012
The foul
is charged to Ron.
233
00:11:06,015 --> 00:11:08,015
Look at how cute he is.
234
00:11:08,017 --> 00:11:11,007
He is gorgeous.
235
00:11:14,017 --> 00:11:16,017
He looked at me.
Did you just
see him look at me?
236
00:11:16,019 --> 00:11:17,019
He totally likes you.
237
00:11:18,001 --> 00:11:20,011
-You think?
-Look at these seats.
238
00:11:20,014 --> 00:11:23,024
You're right.
These seats are
too good to be casual.
239
00:11:24,020 --> 00:11:26,020
Time out, New York.
240
00:11:26,020 --> 00:11:29,000
Ladies and gentlemen,
please welcome...
241
00:11:29,006 --> 00:11:31,006
The Knicks City Dancers!
242
00:11:31,008 --> 00:11:33,008
Did I ever tell you
I was a cheerleader?
243
00:11:33,007 --> 00:11:37,017
No, because you knew
I would mock you endlessly.
244
00:11:38,013 --> 00:11:42,013
♪ Rolling on the river ♪
245
00:11:48,015 --> 00:11:51,005
♪ Looking for a job
In the city ♪
246
00:11:51,009 --> 00:11:53,999
♪ Working for the man
Every night and day ♪
247
00:11:54,002 --> 00:11:56,022
♪ And I never lost
A minute of sleepin' ♪
248
00:11:56,021 --> 00:11:59,021
♪ Worrying 'bout the way
Things might have been ♪
249
00:12:00,001 --> 00:12:02,011
♪ Big wheel keep on turning ♪
250
00:12:02,008 --> 00:12:03,998
Did you used to do that?
251
00:12:04,002 --> 00:12:08,002
No, we just did some hurkees
and some kicks.
252
00:12:08,003 --> 00:12:10,013
♪ Rollin' on the river ♪
253
00:12:10,013 --> 00:12:16,003
♪ Said we're rollin', rollin'
Rollin' on a river ♪
254
00:12:16,023 --> 00:12:19,023
♪ Do, do, do, do... ♪
255
00:12:22,002 --> 00:12:23,022
What is she doing?
256
00:12:23,019 --> 00:12:25,009
That blonde one
in front?
257
00:12:25,008 --> 00:12:26,008
Uh-huh.
258
00:12:26,008 --> 00:12:31,008
♪ Rollin', rollin'
Rollin' on a river ♪
259
00:12:32,010 --> 00:12:33,010
Woo!
260
00:12:33,009 --> 00:12:34,999
She's flirting
with your boyfriend.
261
00:12:35,002 --> 00:12:36,022
He is not my boyfriend.
262
00:12:39,010 --> 00:12:41,020
What, is she like, 21?
263
00:12:43,018 --> 00:12:45,998
It was Friday night,
it was the big game,
264
00:12:46,004 --> 00:12:49,004
and Miranda was jealous
of a cheerleader.
265
00:12:51,012 --> 00:12:54,002
Two hours later,
the game ended,
266
00:12:54,004 --> 00:12:56,014
and Miranda
felt like the loser.
267
00:12:57,004 --> 00:12:58,024
Okay, let's just go.
268
00:12:58,023 --> 00:13:01,003
No, you have to go over there
and talk to him!
269
00:13:01,005 --> 00:13:02,005
But he's talking
to her.
270
00:13:02,008 --> 00:13:04,008
You are better than her.
271
00:13:04,009 --> 00:13:06,019
Go on, you can do it.
272
00:13:06,020 --> 00:13:08,010
Are you going
to do a "hurkee" now?
273
00:13:08,016 --> 00:13:10,996
Just you go over there
and flirt a little bit.
274
00:13:13,000 --> 00:13:14,000
Go, go!
275
00:13:17,003 --> 00:13:19,023
The Knicks
from Madison Square Garden
thank you for coming.
276
00:13:19,019 --> 00:13:20,999
Have a safe trip home.
277
00:13:21,003 --> 00:13:22,003
That's it.
278
00:13:22,005 --> 00:13:23,995
I'm out.
279
00:13:24,002 --> 00:13:27,022
Meanwhile,
I invited Jeremy to come over
and watch a movie,
280
00:13:27,021 --> 00:13:29,021
which in high school
was code for
281
00:13:29,021 --> 00:13:32,001
"come over and make out."
282
00:13:32,002 --> 00:13:34,012
And happily, it still was.
283
00:13:34,013 --> 00:13:35,023
Oh, I gotta run.
284
00:13:35,017 --> 00:13:37,017
The last train leaves
in half an hour.
285
00:13:37,020 --> 00:13:41,010
Oh. I think you should stay.
286
00:13:41,007 --> 00:13:43,017
I think we should
go all the way.
287
00:13:44,022 --> 00:13:45,022
All the way?
288
00:13:45,022 --> 00:13:47,022
We never did, and now we can.
289
00:13:47,022 --> 00:13:50,022
And your mother won't walk in
with her laundry and her Tab.
290
00:13:52,022 --> 00:13:55,012
That's true...
291
00:13:55,011 --> 00:13:58,011
But, Carrie, I need to be honest
with you about something.
292
00:13:58,012 --> 00:14:02,022
That's the worst thing
you can hear from someone
you really like.
293
00:14:02,020 --> 00:14:05,020
I'm not really just
taking time off, I'm, uh...
294
00:14:07,010 --> 00:14:09,000
I'm sort of in a, uh...
295
00:14:12,019 --> 00:14:14,009
mental institution.
296
00:14:14,013 --> 00:14:19,003
No, actually, that's
the worst thing you can hear.
297
00:14:19,003 --> 00:14:22,013
I wanted a man who would commit,
not a man who was committed.
298
00:14:22,008 --> 00:14:24,018
Apparently, we have
to be more specific.
299
00:14:24,023 --> 00:14:26,023
But how was he able to see you?
300
00:14:26,018 --> 00:14:28,008
Ooh, did he escape?
301
00:14:28,012 --> 00:14:30,022
No, he's voluntary.
302
00:14:30,023 --> 00:14:33,013
He says it's not really
a mental institution.
303
00:14:33,015 --> 00:14:36,005
It's a "therapeutic community."
304
00:14:36,008 --> 00:14:36,998
Which one?
305
00:14:37,006 --> 00:14:38,006
Juno-Spears?
306
00:14:38,014 --> 00:14:39,014
Oh, that's supposed
to be a good one.
307
00:14:39,014 --> 00:14:41,014
I've had clients go there.
308
00:14:41,010 --> 00:14:42,020
Really, why haven't
we heard about that?
309
00:14:42,020 --> 00:14:44,010
Because I'm good at my job.
310
00:14:44,007 --> 00:14:46,007
No one wants to admit
they're in a loony bin.
311
00:14:46,013 --> 00:14:47,013
On a first date.
312
00:14:47,010 --> 00:14:49,010
It's all humiliating.
313
00:14:49,015 --> 00:14:51,015
Think about what we have
to go through to date!
314
00:14:51,017 --> 00:14:55,017
I am 38 and I am competing
with a cheerleader.
315
00:14:55,022 --> 00:14:56,022
Yeah, and even when
you get the guy,
316
00:14:56,023 --> 00:14:59,023
you never know what fun surprise
might be revealed.
317
00:14:59,017 --> 00:15:01,997
Let me tell you
something, ladies.
318
00:15:02,002 --> 00:15:05,022
In a good relationship,
there are no surprises.
319
00:15:05,020 --> 00:15:07,020
I know everything about Marcus
320
00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:10,020
and Marcus knows
everything about me.
321
00:15:15,012 --> 00:15:17,012
I don't think
he knows everything.
322
00:15:18,014 --> 00:15:23,014
What?
323
00:15:23,014 --> 00:15:26,014
Charlotte, like all girls,
learned at an early age
324
00:15:26,013 --> 00:15:28,013
that the only way
to get rid of information
325
00:15:28,016 --> 00:15:32,006
you don't want to have
is to pass it on.
326
00:15:32,010 --> 00:15:34,020
Oh, my God.
Is this real?
327
00:15:35,001 --> 00:15:38,021
Anthony found it in an old
issue of Honcho magazine.
328
00:15:38,018 --> 00:15:40,998
Let me see that!
329
00:15:41,003 --> 00:15:42,023
Oh, my.
330
00:15:42,021 --> 00:15:44,021
Is that Marcus?
331
00:15:44,021 --> 00:15:46,001
Tsk, tsk, tsk.
332
00:15:46,002 --> 00:15:47,012
What is that?
333
00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:49,010
Nothing.
334
00:15:49,012 --> 00:15:54,022
Okay, hand it over.
335
00:16:01,017 --> 00:16:02,017
Where did this come from?
336
00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:06,020
Someone better tell me where
this came from right now!
337
00:16:06,023 --> 00:16:08,003
I'm not kidding!
338
00:16:08,002 --> 00:16:09,012
I got it from Carrie.
339
00:16:09,016 --> 00:16:10,016
I got it from Miranda.
340
00:16:10,023 --> 00:16:11,023
I got it from Charlotte.
341
00:16:11,023 --> 00:16:12,023
I got it from Anthony,
342
00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:14,010
but I told him
that you and Marcus
343
00:16:14,015 --> 00:16:15,995
were very much in love.
344
00:16:16,004 --> 00:16:18,014
Charlotte was still
a cheerleader for love.
345
00:16:18,015 --> 00:16:21,015
But like the Knicks, her team
was having a bad season.
346
00:16:22,012 --> 00:16:24,002
Wow.
347
00:16:24,002 --> 00:16:26,012
You think you know somebody...
348
00:16:28,002 --> 00:16:32,002
Excuse me.
Which one of you is
Annabelle Bronstein?
349
00:16:32,004 --> 00:16:33,014
I am.
350
00:16:33,014 --> 00:16:34,014
Well, that's impossible.
351
00:16:34,015 --> 00:16:37,015
Miss Bronstein is in London
for the week.
352
00:16:38,001 --> 00:16:41,001
No, I am Annabelle Bronstein.
353
00:16:42,012 --> 00:16:44,022
And she's British.
354
00:16:44,023 --> 00:16:50,013
As I was saying, dear sir,
I am Annabelle Bronstein.
355
00:16:50,015 --> 00:16:52,005
I'm fairly certain
you are not Annabelle.
356
00:16:52,008 --> 00:16:54,998
I've spoken to her on the phone.
357
00:16:55,005 --> 00:16:58,005
I am absolutely
Annabelle Bronstein.
358
00:16:58,008 --> 00:17:02,008
And I do not pay
900 American dollars annually
359
00:17:02,016 --> 00:17:04,006
to be treated like this.
360
00:17:04,007 --> 00:17:08,007
Now, ring round the waiter and
have him tally up the drinks.
361
00:17:09,004 --> 00:17:11,004
What's with the accent?
362
00:17:11,003 --> 00:17:12,013
She's got a case
of the Madonnas.
363
00:17:12,012 --> 00:17:16,012
I'm sorry, but I know for a fact
that Annabelle lost her card.
364
00:17:17,007 --> 00:17:20,017
Yes, I thought I did,
365
00:17:20,023 --> 00:17:23,013
but it was on top of the telly.
366
00:17:23,007 --> 00:17:27,007
And Miss Bronstein
is from Sussex, as am I,
367
00:17:27,013 --> 00:17:30,023
and I'd venture to guess
that you are not, in fact,
368
00:17:30,021 --> 00:17:32,001
from the UK.
369
00:17:33,003 --> 00:17:34,013
Well, that's true.
370
00:17:35,008 --> 00:17:37,018
I was raised in India.
371
00:17:37,017 --> 00:17:38,007
On any given day,
372
00:17:38,015 --> 00:17:40,015
there are a lot of versions
of crazy
373
00:17:40,021 --> 00:17:42,011
right here in New York.
374
00:17:42,009 --> 00:17:46,009
Today, Annabelle Bronstein
had multiple personalities,
375
00:17:46,016 --> 00:17:49,006
and at least two accents.
376
00:17:50,020 --> 00:17:52,010
Hey, Hobbes.
377
00:17:52,014 --> 00:17:54,014
Where'd you disappear to
after the game?
378
00:17:54,014 --> 00:17:55,014
Oh...
379
00:17:55,011 --> 00:17:57,001
I was gonna thank you,
380
00:17:57,003 --> 00:17:59,013
but you were talking
to that girl.
381
00:17:59,012 --> 00:18:00,022
What girl?
382
00:18:00,019 --> 00:18:02,009
Some cheerleader.
383
00:18:04,008 --> 00:18:05,008
Oh.
384
00:18:05,010 --> 00:18:06,020
Do you like her?
385
00:18:06,023 --> 00:18:07,023
No.
386
00:18:10,006 --> 00:18:11,016
I like someone else.
387
00:18:14,005 --> 00:18:15,005
You.
388
00:18:15,010 --> 00:18:18,010
This cheered Miranda
up immediately.
389
00:18:18,009 --> 00:18:20,009
Now, see, how would I know that?
390
00:18:22,000 --> 00:18:22,020
Well...
391
00:18:25,017 --> 00:18:27,007
Would it be any clearer...
392
00:18:29,002 --> 00:18:30,012
if I did this?
393
00:18:42,002 --> 00:18:43,022
-Hi, Mrs. McCaffrey.
-Hello, Mrs. McCaffrey.
394
00:18:48,009 --> 00:18:49,999
I wanted you to have these.
395
00:18:50,016 --> 00:18:51,996
Marbles.
396
00:18:52,002 --> 00:18:53,002
In case I lose any more of mine,
397
00:18:53,006 --> 00:18:55,006
I want to know where
I can find a stash.
398
00:18:55,008 --> 00:18:57,008
How are you?
Do you want to come in?
399
00:18:57,007 --> 00:18:58,017
She asks, with trepidation.
400
00:18:58,020 --> 00:19:01,010
No, I think it's great
what you're doing, I just--
401
00:19:01,013 --> 00:19:03,013
I know I probably threw you for
a loop the other day, but um...
402
00:19:04,019 --> 00:19:06,019
I should probably
just come right out
403
00:19:06,017 --> 00:19:08,017
and say something about this,
but I...
404
00:19:08,022 --> 00:19:11,012
Truth is, I haven't worked out
my "rap" on it yet.
405
00:19:11,008 --> 00:19:14,008
Well, it's a tough thing
to "slip in."
406
00:19:14,007 --> 00:19:14,997
Yeah, it is.
407
00:19:15,005 --> 00:19:16,005
"Hi, I might be crazy!
408
00:19:16,014 --> 00:19:18,014
Would you like
to share an appetizer?"
409
00:19:19,018 --> 00:19:21,008
The thing is, I...
410
00:19:21,007 --> 00:19:23,017
I think I made it sound
worse than it is.
411
00:19:23,020 --> 00:19:26,020
If you saw Juno-Spears,
you'd see that it's not
Cuckoo's Nest.
412
00:19:26,019 --> 00:19:28,009
It's more like...
413
00:19:28,007 --> 00:19:29,017
it's like Canyon Ranch
for the brain.
414
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:31,010
Do they have Pilates?
415
00:19:31,016 --> 00:19:33,016
They do have Pilates.
416
00:19:34,001 --> 00:19:38,011
I don't want to lie to you.
I am going through some
pretty heavy stuff.
417
00:19:38,008 --> 00:19:41,018
I mean, soul searching, really.
418
00:19:41,021 --> 00:19:44,001
Trying to figure out why
419
00:19:44,006 --> 00:19:46,006
some things seem
to be harder for me
420
00:19:46,008 --> 00:19:48,008
than they are for other people.
421
00:19:48,012 --> 00:19:50,022
I think my family has
something to do with it.
422
00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:53,012
It's always good to blame
the parents, right?
423
00:19:53,007 --> 00:19:53,997
Right.
424
00:19:54,004 --> 00:19:55,014
So I figured I could spend
425
00:19:55,009 --> 00:19:56,019
the next five years in therapy
426
00:19:56,019 --> 00:19:57,019
or just spend the next month
427
00:19:58,000 --> 00:19:59,020
and really deal with it
intensively right now.
428
00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:01,000
It's just more efficient.
429
00:20:01,006 --> 00:20:03,006
Well, you make a very good case.
430
00:20:03,010 --> 00:20:04,020
That's what my doctors say.
431
00:20:06,004 --> 00:20:07,004
Well, that's it.
432
00:20:07,005 --> 00:20:07,995
Ta-da.
433
00:20:08,003 --> 00:20:11,003
I just wanted to explain myself
434
00:20:11,005 --> 00:20:13,005
so that I didn't
become known eternally
435
00:20:13,013 --> 00:20:16,013
as that nutcase you dated
back in high school.
436
00:20:16,013 --> 00:20:20,003
How about
"my high school boyfriend,
who was the best kisser ever"?
437
00:20:20,006 --> 00:20:21,996
I could live with that.
438
00:20:22,006 --> 00:20:25,006
You're not bad yourself
either, you know?
439
00:20:25,016 --> 00:20:27,016
That night,
we went all the way.
440
00:20:27,021 --> 00:20:29,021
And we weren't the only ones.
441
00:20:29,019 --> 00:20:34,019
♪ Rollin', rollin'
Rollin' on a river ♪
442
00:20:34,023 --> 00:20:37,013
♪ River
Do, do, do, do, do ♪
443
00:20:37,008 --> 00:20:38,008
♪ All right ♪
444
00:20:40,010 --> 00:20:43,020
The next afternoon, my other
crazy boyfriend stopped by.
445
00:20:44,010 --> 00:20:45,010
It's true.
446
00:20:45,009 --> 00:20:47,019
Marcus was a gay escort.
447
00:20:47,022 --> 00:20:50,002
But he's been off
the market since 1992.
448
00:20:50,003 --> 00:20:51,013
So you talked about it?
449
00:20:51,007 --> 00:20:52,997
Yes, and he says he did it
450
00:20:53,004 --> 00:20:56,004
just to put himself
through dance classes.
451
00:20:56,006 --> 00:20:58,996
But if that's true,
then why keep it a secret?
452
00:20:59,004 --> 00:21:01,004
Maybe he was embarrassed.
453
00:21:01,006 --> 00:21:02,016
Yes, but...
454
00:21:02,019 --> 00:21:04,009
It's not the escort thing,
455
00:21:04,015 --> 00:21:06,015
but the secret thing
that's bothering me.
456
00:21:06,020 --> 00:21:08,020
I was the last to know!
457
00:21:08,019 --> 00:21:10,999
I don't want to hear the truth
from some bitchy queen
458
00:21:11,004 --> 00:21:12,024
with back issues of Honcho.
459
00:21:13,020 --> 00:21:14,020
So...
460
00:21:15,018 --> 00:21:16,008
we broke up.
461
00:21:16,016 --> 00:21:18,016
Oh, Stanny, really?
462
00:21:18,017 --> 00:21:19,017
Yes.
463
00:21:21,006 --> 00:21:23,006
And right before the prom!
464
00:21:23,013 --> 00:21:26,023
And I still have to go
because I'm on
the decorations committee.
465
00:21:26,021 --> 00:21:28,011
And I have no date.
466
00:21:28,007 --> 00:21:29,997
Again.
467
00:21:30,004 --> 00:21:31,004
Well, when is it?
468
00:21:31,005 --> 00:21:32,015
Tomorrow night.
469
00:21:32,021 --> 00:21:35,011
Will you please, please,
please go with me?
470
00:21:35,007 --> 00:21:38,007
I can't.
I have to visit my boyfriend
at the asylum.
471
00:21:38,014 --> 00:21:39,024
Of course you do.
472
00:21:39,020 --> 00:21:42,010
He wants me to see
the place for myself.
473
00:21:42,008 --> 00:21:44,008
It's supposed to be
like Canyon Ranch.
474
00:21:44,009 --> 00:21:45,009
Honey...
475
00:21:45,014 --> 00:21:48,014
I know, but I like him.
476
00:21:48,015 --> 00:21:49,015
You'd have to.
477
00:21:49,020 --> 00:21:51,010
And who are we to say
he's got issues?
478
00:21:51,010 --> 00:21:54,000
He's getting help.
Usually that's
considered a good thing.
479
00:21:54,003 --> 00:21:56,023
And it's New York.
Everybody's insane.
480
00:21:56,022 --> 00:21:58,012
You slept with him, didn't you?
481
00:21:58,011 --> 00:21:59,021
Yes.
482
00:21:59,022 --> 00:22:02,012
Oh, that's where
the problems begin.
483
00:22:02,012 --> 00:22:07,002
You sleep with someone,
you start rationalizing
away all the red flags.
484
00:22:07,005 --> 00:22:09,005
At least he was honest about it.
485
00:22:09,008 --> 00:22:10,018
Yes.
486
00:22:10,023 --> 00:22:12,023
Unlike "Paul."
487
00:22:12,023 --> 00:22:14,023
Oh...
488
00:22:26,002 --> 00:22:28,002
Apparently,
the Juno-Spears Center
489
00:22:28,002 --> 00:22:30,022
was harder than
the Soho House to get into.
490
00:22:31,008 --> 00:22:32,018
Or out of.
491
00:22:39,012 --> 00:22:44,022
Even as a visitor,
I could see how this was a very
relaxing place to get away to.
492
00:22:44,020 --> 00:22:46,020
Mm.
493
00:22:46,019 --> 00:22:48,009
-It's kind of nice, huh?
-Mm-hmm.
494
00:22:48,010 --> 00:22:51,010
And there are great
hiking trails all around here.
495
00:22:51,011 --> 00:22:52,021
Maybe later we can do a hike.
496
00:22:52,023 --> 00:22:55,013
Oh, I don't really hike.
497
00:22:55,007 --> 00:22:56,017
Neither do I.
498
00:22:56,020 --> 00:22:58,020
But I will fill you in
on something I discovered.
499
00:22:59,019 --> 00:23:00,019
Hiking...
500
00:23:01,017 --> 00:23:02,997
is walking.
501
00:23:03,002 --> 00:23:04,012
-Really?
-Yes, hiking is walking.
502
00:23:04,016 --> 00:23:05,016
I started to think,
503
00:23:05,021 --> 00:23:07,011
maybe the Juno-Spears Center
504
00:23:07,014 --> 00:23:09,024
should be mandatory
for New Yorkers,
505
00:23:10,001 --> 00:23:12,011
like the Hamptons,
or Fire Island.
506
00:23:12,007 --> 00:23:15,017
Feces, feces, feces!
507
00:23:15,022 --> 00:23:17,012
Get him!
Feces!
508
00:23:17,009 --> 00:23:18,999
Uh, uh, uh!
509
00:23:21,016 --> 00:23:24,006
Feces, feces!
510
00:23:24,008 --> 00:23:27,008
I guess that doesn't happen very
often at Canyon Ranch, huh?
511
00:23:27,016 --> 00:23:29,006
I've never been.
512
00:23:29,013 --> 00:23:31,013
-It might.
-Who am I kidding?
513
00:23:31,013 --> 00:23:34,013
This is a full-on
psychiatric facility.
514
00:23:34,008 --> 00:23:35,998
With Pilates.
515
00:23:38,005 --> 00:23:39,995
You're definitely
the sanest person here.
516
00:23:40,006 --> 00:23:43,016
Well, thank you.
But that's kind of like being
the best house on a bad block.
517
00:23:43,019 --> 00:23:45,999
People would advise you
against buying it.
518
00:23:47,014 --> 00:23:49,014
Maybe it just wasn't
the wisest thing
519
00:23:49,011 --> 00:23:51,011
to start something
while I was still in here.
520
00:23:53,021 --> 00:23:57,011
Maybe when I get out
in eight to ten months...
521
00:23:59,014 --> 00:24:01,014
Eight to ten months?
522
00:24:01,009 --> 00:24:03,019
Yeah, my doctor still thinks
I have a lot of work to do.
523
00:24:04,001 --> 00:24:05,021
Oh.
524
00:24:05,022 --> 00:24:07,022
And to be honest with you,
I'm comfortable here.
525
00:24:08,001 --> 00:24:12,021
I kind of like it.
I like that
everybody's craziness
526
00:24:12,017 --> 00:24:13,017
is out in the open.
527
00:24:16,007 --> 00:24:17,007
Yeah.
528
00:24:18,009 --> 00:24:21,009
Well... I loved seeing you.
529
00:24:21,011 --> 00:24:23,021
I've loved seeing you again.
530
00:24:25,023 --> 00:24:27,013
But I understand.
531
00:24:27,011 --> 00:24:32,011
We're just in very
different places right now.
532
00:24:32,010 --> 00:24:36,020
Ironically, it was
the sanest breakup I ever had.
533
00:24:38,022 --> 00:24:43,022
And now, the queen
and queen of our prom...
534
00:24:43,018 --> 00:24:47,008
Carrie Bradshaw
and Stanford Blatch.
535
00:24:52,010 --> 00:24:55,020
Oh, my God!
I love this song.
536
00:24:55,019 --> 00:24:56,009
Me too.
537
00:24:56,016 --> 00:24:57,016
-I'll take this, honey.
-Oh!
538
00:24:58,001 --> 00:24:59,021
Thank you very much.
539
00:25:02,011 --> 00:25:06,021
♪ You'll take away
The biggest part of me ♪
540
00:25:08,014 --> 00:25:12,024
♪ Ooo-ooh, no
Baby, please don't go ♪
541
00:25:12,017 --> 00:25:15,007
This is my best prom ever.
542
00:25:15,012 --> 00:25:16,022
-Oh.
-Thank you for coming.
543
00:25:17,001 --> 00:25:20,011
Oh, believe me, I'm glad to be
back with the normal people.
544
00:25:21,018 --> 00:25:23,008
You know the craziest
thing of all?
545
00:25:23,014 --> 00:25:25,024
-Hm?
-I somehow thought,
546
00:25:25,019 --> 00:25:28,019
that after everything
I've been through,
547
00:25:28,017 --> 00:25:32,017
I might end up
with my high school boyfriend.
548
00:25:32,018 --> 00:25:36,008
Yeah.
I don't think my story's
gonna get tied up like that.
549
00:25:36,008 --> 00:25:37,998
Your boyfriend
might get tied up.
550
00:25:38,003 --> 00:25:39,023
And taken away.
551
00:25:39,018 --> 00:25:42,018
Okay, no more jokes.
I might be dating him
in eight to ten months.
552
00:25:46,013 --> 00:25:47,023
-Oh.
-May I cut in?
553
00:25:48,001 --> 00:25:48,021
Um...
554
00:25:49,000 --> 00:25:49,020
Uh, no, thank you.
555
00:25:50,001 --> 00:25:51,021
I already have an escort.
556
00:25:55,012 --> 00:25:58,022
Honey, I didn't tell you
because it's part of my past.
557
00:25:58,017 --> 00:26:00,017
It's not who I am anymore.
558
00:26:00,021 --> 00:26:02,021
I was really
messed up back then.
559
00:26:03,001 --> 00:26:04,021
But I've got it together now.
560
00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:08,000
And it's prom night.
561
00:26:08,003 --> 00:26:09,023
And we have to have a dance.
562
00:26:09,020 --> 00:26:13,000
♪ How can we end it
All this way ♪
563
00:26:13,004 --> 00:26:15,004
Why don't I get some punch?
564
00:26:15,003 --> 00:26:19,023
♪ When tomorrow comes
And we'll both regret ♪
565
00:26:19,020 --> 00:26:23,010
♪ The things we said today ♪
566
00:26:23,015 --> 00:26:25,005
Just tell me one thing?
567
00:26:25,012 --> 00:26:27,022
Did you ever, ever sleep
568
00:26:27,022 --> 00:26:30,012
with that little bitchy
pine nut, Anthony?
569
00:26:30,013 --> 00:26:32,023
No. God, no.
570
00:26:35,004 --> 00:26:40,014
♪ Ooo-ooh, no
Baby, please don't go ♪
571
00:26:49,015 --> 00:26:50,995
♪ Ooh, girl ♪
572
00:26:51,005 --> 00:26:54,995
♪ Just got to have you
By my side ♪
573
00:26:57,021 --> 00:26:59,011
So maybe it won't
look the way
574
00:26:59,008 --> 00:27:01,018
you thought it would look
in high school.
575
00:27:01,021 --> 00:27:04,021
But it's good to remember
love is possible.
576
00:27:04,017 --> 00:27:07,007
♪ Baby, please don't go ♪
577
00:27:07,010 --> 00:27:09,010
Anything is possible.
578
00:27:09,011 --> 00:27:11,011
This is New York.
579
00:27:16,017 --> 00:27:18,007
♪ Ooh, my, my ♪
580
00:27:18,015 --> 00:27:20,015
♪ I just got to have
Your lovin' ♪