1 00:00:13,677 --> 00:00:15,721 Season's greetings. 2 00:00:15,888 --> 00:00:17,598 Hey. 3 00:00:17,807 --> 00:00:20,559 Oh, God. The reindeer sweater? 4 00:00:20,768 --> 00:00:21,936 That's right. 5 00:00:22,144 --> 00:00:24,438 Look at it. Don't look away. 6 00:00:25,189 --> 00:00:27,650 I can't help it. It frightens me. 7 00:00:27,900 --> 00:00:30,444 Come on, I've had it since the 11th grade. What's wrong with it? 8 00:00:30,653 --> 00:00:32,363 Have you looked in a mirror? 9 00:00:33,489 --> 00:00:34,740 It's okay, I know the rules. 10 00:00:34,949 --> 00:00:38,119 Don't wear it out of the house, don't wear it to any holiday parties, 11 00:00:38,327 --> 00:00:41,997 and if anybody comes over, I have to run upstairs. 12 00:00:42,873 --> 00:00:44,834 What's that on the back of your arm? 13 00:00:47,670 --> 00:00:50,923 Oh, what do you know? 14 00:00:51,090 --> 00:00:52,633 Candy cane. 15 00:00:52,800 --> 00:00:56,470 A little gift from some Christmas past. 16 00:00:57,346 --> 00:00:59,640 You're not actually gonna eat that, are you? 17 00:00:59,890 --> 00:01:01,851 Have I made a decision? No. 18 00:01:02,017 --> 00:01:05,354 Am I intrigued? Certainly. 19 00:01:05,563 --> 00:01:07,857 Give me that. 20 00:01:09,650 --> 00:01:13,070 That's all right. There might be others. 21 00:01:50,948 --> 00:01:52,491 I can't believe this. 22 00:01:52,741 --> 00:01:54,451 Can't believe what? What happened? 23 00:01:55,035 --> 00:01:58,539 Those fancy schmancy neighbours across the street are what happened. 24 00:01:58,914 --> 00:02:02,876 - I'm so angry I could spit. - Okay, mission accomplished. 25 00:02:03,085 --> 00:02:05,796 All right, now just calm down and tell me what happened. 26 00:02:06,463 --> 00:02:08,340 I put a wreath on our front door last night, 27 00:02:08,507 --> 00:02:11,051 and now I come home to find one twice the size of ours 28 00:02:11,218 --> 00:02:13,011 hanging on the Rinaldi's door. 29 00:02:13,220 --> 00:02:15,806 - So? - So it's a snub. 30 00:02:16,014 --> 00:02:17,015 It's their way of saying: 31 00:02:17,224 --> 00:02:21,603 "Look at us, world, we're richer than those schnooks across the street." 32 00:02:21,854 --> 00:02:24,940 How dare they flaunt their wealth at us. 33 00:02:27,025 --> 00:02:31,572 Wealth? Dad, Mr. Rinaldi drives a cab, and his wife works for Easter Seals. 34 00:02:31,738 --> 00:02:33,282 Yeah, and they're gonna make sure 35 00:02:33,490 --> 00:02:35,451 everyone in the neighbourhood knows it. 36 00:02:35,659 --> 00:02:39,496 Well, honey, the Rinaldis are about to look directly into the mouth of hell. 37 00:02:39,705 --> 00:02:42,541 Dad, Dad, can't you just take a white pill and a blue pill 38 00:02:42,750 --> 00:02:44,376 and leave this alone? 39 00:02:44,585 --> 00:02:49,214 Oh, I will take those pills, but I will not leave this alone. 40 00:02:52,885 --> 00:02:54,136 - Hey. - Hey. 41 00:02:54,344 --> 00:02:56,847 Wanna help me wrap a little bit? 42 00:02:57,890 --> 00:03:00,976 Sure, but I think we need to have a little talk first. 43 00:03:01,226 --> 00:03:03,687 What? What happened? Is everything okay? 44 00:03:03,896 --> 00:03:06,899 Well, it's just that today, at work, 45 00:03:07,065 --> 00:03:10,819 out of the blue, I got called into Supervisor O'Boyle's office and... 46 00:03:11,028 --> 00:03:12,654 And...? And what? 47 00:03:13,155 --> 00:03:17,618 He just handed me this $3,000 Christmas bonus. 48 00:03:18,494 --> 00:03:21,997 Three thousand dollars? I can't believe it. 49 00:03:22,206 --> 00:03:25,793 See what I did there? I made you think it was bad, when, actually, it was good. 50 00:03:26,001 --> 00:03:28,670 Yeah, you're a comedic genius. Let me see this. 51 00:03:28,837 --> 00:03:31,840 Holy crap. Three thousand bucks. 52 00:03:32,007 --> 00:03:36,053 And all I got was a donation made in my name to some disease charity. 53 00:03:36,261 --> 00:03:38,055 Yeah, thank you. 54 00:03:38,263 --> 00:03:39,431 What do you wanna do with it? 55 00:03:39,598 --> 00:03:42,434 Well, I'm thinking, and go with me here, 56 00:03:42,643 --> 00:03:45,145 double-D breast implants. 57 00:03:49,942 --> 00:03:53,278 Why? The ones you have now are so cute and perky. 58 00:03:56,115 --> 00:03:58,325 Way to turn it around on me. 59 00:03:58,534 --> 00:04:00,174 I'm serious. What do you wanna do with it? 60 00:04:00,369 --> 00:04:02,089 I guess we should throw it in the bank quick 61 00:04:02,287 --> 00:04:05,040 before they realise what a mediocre employee I really am. 62 00:04:05,874 --> 00:04:07,334 Really? Put it in the bank? 63 00:04:07,668 --> 00:04:09,711 Why, you got another idea? 64 00:04:09,878 --> 00:04:11,672 Solid-gold bathtub? 65 00:04:11,839 --> 00:04:15,509 Should we have our teeth drilled, little rubies put in? "Hey, what's up?" 66 00:04:17,136 --> 00:04:18,512 No. 67 00:04:18,679 --> 00:04:20,973 I was thinking that all these lawyers at my firm 68 00:04:21,181 --> 00:04:23,475 have been investing in all these Internet stocks, 69 00:04:23,684 --> 00:04:26,186 and they have been making some stupid money. 70 00:04:26,437 --> 00:04:29,773 - Put the money in the stock market? - These web stocks are exploding. 71 00:04:29,940 --> 00:04:32,317 You remember that lawyer from my firm, Harry Stern in? 72 00:04:32,734 --> 00:04:33,986 No. 73 00:04:34,236 --> 00:04:36,113 The one you said looks like a fat Phil Collins. 74 00:04:37,030 --> 00:04:38,407 Oh, yeah. 75 00:04:38,657 --> 00:04:41,368 Anyway, he bought this stock called Shominy dot something, 76 00:04:41,535 --> 00:04:45,456 and he tripled his money in the last four days. 77 00:04:45,706 --> 00:04:47,249 Shominy? What do they even do? 78 00:04:47,458 --> 00:04:50,002 I don't know, they make shominys. Who cares? 79 00:04:50,210 --> 00:04:55,632 The point is, the stock was at $2 on Monday, and now it's at 6. 80 00:04:55,841 --> 00:04:57,384 - What do you think? - I don't know. 81 00:04:57,551 --> 00:04:59,678 I kind of like my "put it in the bank" idea. 82 00:04:59,887 --> 00:05:02,723 Come on, Dougie, the gravy train is pulling out. 83 00:05:02,931 --> 00:05:04,892 Why can't we jump on the gravy train? 84 00:05:05,100 --> 00:05:06,580 Because sometimes gravy trains derail. 85 00:05:06,769 --> 00:05:09,521 Then there's blood and gravy everywhere. 86 00:05:10,731 --> 00:05:13,400 All right, whatever, I tried. 87 00:05:15,235 --> 00:05:17,446 Put it back. 88 00:05:52,189 --> 00:05:54,775 - Doug, Doug, come here. - What? 89 00:05:55,025 --> 00:05:58,946 Advanced digital business-to-business e-commerce networking solutions. 90 00:06:00,906 --> 00:06:03,575 Shominy. Com. You wanted to know what they did, so I looked it up. 91 00:06:03,742 --> 00:06:05,202 - Now you know. - Thanks. 92 00:06:05,411 --> 00:06:08,330 - I'll be in the shower. - Doug, come on, this is a great stock. 93 00:06:08,914 --> 00:06:11,041 Four analysts named it their top pick. 94 00:06:11,250 --> 00:06:13,210 Come on, Carrie. All this stuff is just so risky. 95 00:06:13,419 --> 00:06:16,255 - So you take a risk once in a while. - Why do I have to take a risk? 96 00:06:16,422 --> 00:06:18,632 Look, honey, if we put the money in the bank, 97 00:06:18,799 --> 00:06:22,136 it'll grow in little dribs and drabs, but if we buy this stock, 98 00:06:22,302 --> 00:06:24,888 we have a chance to finally make some real money. 99 00:06:25,097 --> 00:06:28,016 We can go some place, like Europe. 100 00:06:28,267 --> 00:06:29,518 What's in Europe? 101 00:06:30,060 --> 00:06:33,397 We don't have to go there. We can go anywhere. 102 00:06:33,689 --> 00:06:35,065 Busch Gardens? 103 00:06:35,941 --> 00:06:37,818 We can go to Busch Gardens any time. 104 00:06:38,026 --> 00:06:39,653 - You wanna go this weekend? - Okay, 105 00:06:40,737 --> 00:06:43,198 you are really missing the point. 106 00:06:44,450 --> 00:06:47,870 Look, honey, I am happy with our life. I really am. 107 00:06:48,078 --> 00:06:52,291 We love each other, we have good friends, good jobs. 108 00:06:52,458 --> 00:06:57,087 Now if we just had all that plus, you know, money, 109 00:06:57,713 --> 00:06:59,673 better yet, huh? 110 00:07:00,924 --> 00:07:03,051 - You really wanna do this, huh? - Yes. 111 00:07:03,260 --> 00:07:05,053 All right, I'm your guy. I'm in. 112 00:07:13,937 --> 00:07:15,898 - Oh, here you are. - Yes, here I am. 113 00:07:16,106 --> 00:07:18,150 - How you doing? - Good. 114 00:07:22,696 --> 00:07:24,907 What'd you do? What's the matter? 115 00:07:26,325 --> 00:07:29,828 Nothing. Just feel like getting a little action. 116 00:07:29,995 --> 00:07:31,872 Before dinner? 117 00:07:32,956 --> 00:07:34,750 Are you drinking? 118 00:07:36,126 --> 00:07:39,463 No, but maybe these stock reports I'm holding 119 00:07:39,671 --> 00:07:42,049 might have something to do with it. 120 00:07:42,257 --> 00:07:45,010 Dougie, Shominy. Com just doubled today. 121 00:07:45,260 --> 00:07:49,598 - No. - Yes. 122 00:07:49,765 --> 00:07:51,892 Let me see. Let me see. 123 00:07:52,059 --> 00:07:54,895 Oh, sweet Shominy. 124 00:07:55,104 --> 00:07:56,563 Six grand. Six grand. 125 00:07:56,772 --> 00:07:58,232 I know. I wish we had the cash now. 126 00:07:58,398 --> 00:08:00,278 We could throw it on the bed and have sex on it. 127 00:08:00,526 --> 00:08:02,319 You wanna do it on the stock report? 128 00:08:02,820 --> 00:08:04,696 No, I think it has to be money, don't you? 129 00:08:04,905 --> 00:08:07,574 Don't go by me. I'd have sex with you on an angry bear. 130 00:08:15,582 --> 00:08:17,876 Hello, lovey. 131 00:08:18,919 --> 00:08:21,296 - Oh, hey. - What you doing? 132 00:08:21,505 --> 00:08:23,799 Oh, nothing. Just surfing the web. 133 00:08:23,966 --> 00:08:25,759 Why is your voice so high? 134 00:08:26,051 --> 00:08:27,761 It's not. 135 00:08:28,178 --> 00:08:29,721 What's going on? 136 00:08:29,930 --> 00:08:31,390 The stock is down a little. 137 00:08:31,598 --> 00:08:32,766 A little? What's a little? 138 00:08:32,975 --> 00:08:35,352 Before I tell you, you have to agree not to panic. 139 00:08:35,561 --> 00:08:36,937 By saying that, you make me panic. 140 00:08:37,104 --> 00:08:39,690 Now tell me quickly before I pass out from fear. 141 00:08:40,190 --> 00:08:41,650 - Okay, it's at four. - What? 142 00:08:42,025 --> 00:08:44,945 Carrie, no. We bought it at six, we bought it at six. 143 00:08:45,154 --> 00:08:47,114 - I know. - But four is less than six. 144 00:08:47,322 --> 00:08:48,522 I know. I went to first grade. 145 00:08:48,699 --> 00:08:50,159 Now just calm down. 146 00:08:50,409 --> 00:08:52,202 I can't calm down, Carrie. It's at four. 147 00:08:52,411 --> 00:08:56,165 Look, Harry Stern in said that it's normal for the stock to dip a little. 148 00:08:56,373 --> 00:08:58,417 Well, you know what? Then marry him. 149 00:08:58,667 --> 00:09:02,004 I gotta think, I gotta think, I gotta think. 150 00:09:03,630 --> 00:09:05,340 What do we do? 151 00:09:05,549 --> 00:09:08,218 We hold onto the stock. It'll come back up. 152 00:09:08,594 --> 00:09:09,762 - You think so? - It has to. 153 00:09:09,928 --> 00:09:11,805 Now, look, get a grip. 154 00:09:12,014 --> 00:09:14,683 Remember, we are long-term investors. 155 00:09:14,850 --> 00:09:16,977 We're in this for three to four weeks. 156 00:09:18,353 --> 00:09:21,940 All right, now just calm down and we'll ride it out, okay? 157 00:09:22,941 --> 00:09:24,568 Okay. 158 00:09:45,339 --> 00:09:46,882 What are you doing? 159 00:09:47,049 --> 00:09:49,593 I wanna see where the stock is at. Here, help me get online. 160 00:09:49,802 --> 00:09:52,638 No, no, sweetie. 161 00:09:53,263 --> 00:09:56,266 You can't watch it every minute, you'll drive yourself crazy. 162 00:09:56,517 --> 00:09:58,310 I don't care, I wanna know where it's at. 163 00:09:58,519 --> 00:10:00,395 - Fine, do it yourself. - No, I need your help. 164 00:10:00,604 --> 00:10:03,065 I'm stuck in Solitaire. 165 00:10:06,902 --> 00:10:09,279 Okay. One look, and that's it. 166 00:10:09,446 --> 00:10:11,657 One is fine. One's great. 167 00:10:12,282 --> 00:10:16,662 Okay, we're signed on. It'll just take a second. 168 00:10:22,584 --> 00:10:23,794 Hi. 169 00:10:24,002 --> 00:10:25,546 Hello. 170 00:10:27,005 --> 00:10:28,382 Okay. We're in. 171 00:10:28,590 --> 00:10:32,177 Now we just type in the symbol, and... 172 00:10:34,012 --> 00:10:35,889 What's "oh"? Where you looking? 173 00:10:36,098 --> 00:10:38,767 It says that it's at three. 174 00:10:40,018 --> 00:10:41,395 Oh, my God, it's at three? 175 00:10:41,603 --> 00:10:43,564 - Come on, let's sell, we gotta sell. - No, look. 176 00:10:43,772 --> 00:10:45,332 It says the dip in the stock was because 177 00:10:45,524 --> 00:10:47,901 the FTC approval of their technology was delayed. 178 00:10:48,110 --> 00:10:49,319 Of course it was delayed. 179 00:10:49,570 --> 00:10:51,697 Because no one can figure out what the hell they make. 180 00:10:52,823 --> 00:10:55,909 They make advanced commerce something. 181 00:10:56,076 --> 00:10:57,161 Whatever it is, it's good. 182 00:10:57,369 --> 00:10:59,580 Oh, yeah? Can I buy one? Where do I go? Waldbaum's, huh? 183 00:10:59,788 --> 00:11:02,249 Sam Goody? Has Goody got it? 184 00:11:03,333 --> 00:11:06,420 Doug, could you just calm down because you're starting to panic me. 185 00:11:06,628 --> 00:11:07,713 Because you know I'm right. 186 00:11:07,880 --> 00:11:10,883 We're gonna lose the whole 3 grand. It's gonna go down to zero. 187 00:11:11,091 --> 00:11:12,468 Oh, God, dry heaves. 188 00:11:12,634 --> 00:11:14,428 Stop. 189 00:11:16,972 --> 00:11:19,808 Carrie, look, I am begging you, please, let's just sell. 190 00:11:20,017 --> 00:11:22,686 Let's just sell while we still have enough to go to Busch Gardens. 191 00:11:22,895 --> 00:11:25,522 I don't know. I mean, Harry's not selling. 192 00:11:25,731 --> 00:11:28,108 Harry's a millionaire. He buys and sells people for sport. 193 00:11:28,275 --> 00:11:29,902 He'd kill you as soon as look at you. 194 00:11:31,570 --> 00:11:35,783 Look, Carrie, I'm not wired for this kind of stuff, you know? 195 00:11:35,991 --> 00:11:37,868 I'm jittery, I'm nervous. 196 00:11:38,035 --> 00:11:40,412 Look, my eye is twitching. Look, you see it? 197 00:11:40,954 --> 00:11:44,041 - No. - It's not now, but it was. 198 00:11:44,249 --> 00:11:47,586 We gotta sell, come on. I don't care if it goes up to a hundred tomorrow. 199 00:11:47,753 --> 00:11:49,713 Let's just get out of it and be done with it. 200 00:11:51,215 --> 00:11:54,384 Fine. If it's gonna make you this crazy, then we'll sell it. 201 00:11:54,551 --> 00:11:55,552 Good. 202 00:11:56,678 --> 00:11:58,138 Thank you. 203 00:11:58,305 --> 00:11:59,640 God, 204 00:11:59,807 --> 00:12:03,143 I can't tell you how good it feels to be done with this madness. 205 00:12:08,357 --> 00:12:10,317 It's back up. 206 00:12:26,239 --> 00:12:28,700 Darling, just in time. 207 00:12:29,117 --> 00:12:32,120 What, are you having a party? 208 00:12:32,412 --> 00:12:34,205 No, no, I'm getting into the Christmas spirit 209 00:12:34,414 --> 00:12:35,957 and putting together an outdoor display 210 00:12:36,165 --> 00:12:40,295 that will make the Rinaldis feel poor and ashamed. 211 00:12:40,503 --> 00:12:42,630 So, what do you think? 212 00:12:42,839 --> 00:12:43,923 What is it? 213 00:12:44,173 --> 00:12:46,134 It's a Nativity scene. 214 00:12:46,301 --> 00:12:48,845 - Not so much. - Sure it is. 215 00:12:49,012 --> 00:12:50,096 You got your Wise Men here, 216 00:12:50,305 --> 00:12:53,391 there's Joseph, Mary, and the Baby Jesus. 217 00:12:53,891 --> 00:12:55,351 He's huge. 218 00:12:58,938 --> 00:12:59,939 So? 219 00:13:00,148 --> 00:13:03,484 So he looks like he could crush all the Wise Men to death. 220 00:13:03,902 --> 00:13:06,529 But he wouldn't do that. He's gentle. 221 00:13:06,696 --> 00:13:08,740 He's Baby Jesus. 222 00:13:10,742 --> 00:13:13,494 And what about the wooden Indian? Who's he supposed to be? 223 00:13:13,703 --> 00:13:16,372 No one. I just like it. 224 00:13:16,664 --> 00:13:18,458 And who's to say he wasn't there? 225 00:13:20,919 --> 00:13:23,922 Dad, I love you so much, 226 00:13:24,088 --> 00:13:26,716 but there's no way in hell this is going in front of our house. 227 00:13:28,426 --> 00:13:30,720 And it was the fourth record day in a row for the NASDAQ, 228 00:13:30,929 --> 00:13:33,139 as tech stocks continue to fire the market. 229 00:13:33,348 --> 00:13:36,059 Leading the charge is new issue Shominy. Com, 230 00:13:36,225 --> 00:13:39,729 up over 200 percent on news that it received FTC approval 231 00:13:39,896 --> 00:13:41,147 of its highly anticipated 232 00:13:41,314 --> 00:13:43,691 advanced digital business-to-business e-commerce 233 00:13:43,858 --> 00:13:46,694 networking solution technology. 234 00:13:50,031 --> 00:13:52,325 Approval. They got approval. 235 00:13:52,533 --> 00:13:54,160 Good for them. 236 00:13:54,911 --> 00:13:58,665 Yes. Good for them. 237 00:14:05,505 --> 00:14:07,548 You're hating me right now, aren't you? 238 00:14:07,715 --> 00:14:10,093 No. 239 00:14:11,302 --> 00:14:13,012 Yes, you are. Come on, you can say it. 240 00:14:13,221 --> 00:14:15,932 Chunky made us sell. Chunky cost us money. 241 00:14:16,099 --> 00:14:17,475 That's what you're thinking. 242 00:14:17,684 --> 00:14:20,228 - That is not what I'm thinking. - You have to be thinking that. 243 00:14:20,436 --> 00:14:24,107 If it wasn't for me, we'd be up like 4,000 bucks. 244 00:14:24,315 --> 00:14:25,858 Closer to 5. 245 00:14:26,067 --> 00:14:28,194 But it is not your fault. 246 00:14:28,361 --> 00:14:31,864 I'm the one who let your non-stop bitching 247 00:14:32,031 --> 00:14:34,242 and whimpering wear me down. 248 00:14:34,450 --> 00:14:37,203 And for that, I am very, very sorry. 249 00:14:38,913 --> 00:14:39,914 So we're cool? 250 00:14:41,082 --> 00:14:42,875 I'm sorry, all right? I feel guilty. 251 00:14:43,084 --> 00:14:47,714 You know? I acted like a little sissy investor girl. 252 00:14:47,880 --> 00:14:52,093 Here, make this part of my body. Just make it part of my body. 253 00:14:52,302 --> 00:14:54,262 Doug, would you just forget it? Come on. 254 00:14:54,429 --> 00:14:56,306 We sold the stock. It's over with. 255 00:14:56,472 --> 00:15:01,019 Could we just get on with our lives, okay? 256 00:15:02,145 --> 00:15:04,022 - Okay. - Okay. 257 00:15:10,194 --> 00:15:12,322 Let's buy back in. 258 00:15:13,072 --> 00:15:15,116 - What? - Come on, it's on its way back up. 259 00:15:15,325 --> 00:15:17,368 Okay, that settles it. You need lithium. 260 00:15:18,286 --> 00:15:19,579 No, think about it, we only sold 261 00:15:19,787 --> 00:15:22,332 because we didn't have any approval, you know? 262 00:15:22,582 --> 00:15:26,502 Now we have something to sink our teeth into. We got the... approval. 263 00:15:30,423 --> 00:15:33,259 God, Doug, you are driving me crazy. 264 00:15:33,426 --> 00:15:35,053 But the stock is so high now. 265 00:15:35,303 --> 00:15:36,846 High, and only going higher. I know it. 266 00:15:37,013 --> 00:15:39,307 I feel it. I swear, it's a gut feeling. 267 00:15:39,474 --> 00:15:41,434 This does not lie. 268 00:15:44,437 --> 00:15:45,605 All right, we buy back in. 269 00:15:45,813 --> 00:15:52,528 But this time, we buy the stock and we leave it alone for one full week. 270 00:15:52,737 --> 00:15:54,614 Okay? We do not obsess. 271 00:15:54,781 --> 00:15:57,283 We do not panic. We just go on with our lives 272 00:15:57,492 --> 00:15:59,535 and let the stock do whatever it's gonna do. 273 00:15:59,744 --> 00:16:02,205 Hey. What stock? 274 00:16:06,167 --> 00:16:09,003 Hey, it's all right there. Take your time crossing. 275 00:16:10,546 --> 00:16:13,007 Hey, and have a nice day. 276 00:16:15,134 --> 00:16:17,178 There's a new invention, it's called a turn signal. 277 00:16:17,345 --> 00:16:18,638 Why don't you use it, you moron? 278 00:16:20,598 --> 00:16:24,352 Hey, got enough dogs there, guy? That's crazy, walking all those dogs. 279 00:16:26,062 --> 00:16:28,898 Go on now, go Walk out the door. 280 00:16:30,275 --> 00:16:31,442 Just turn around now. 281 00:16:32,819 --> 00:16:34,862 Those wheels are on your chair for a reason. 282 00:16:35,029 --> 00:16:37,240 Use them! 283 00:16:53,298 --> 00:16:55,592 We've never had any quarrel that I've ever been party to. 284 00:16:55,800 --> 00:16:56,801 I ask nothing of you. 285 00:16:57,051 --> 00:17:00,054 I came here in the spirit of bright goodwill and I won't let you dampen it. 286 00:17:00,263 --> 00:17:01,903 So a merry Christmas to you anyway, uncle. 287 00:17:02,098 --> 00:17:03,808 Good evening. 288 00:17:04,809 --> 00:17:06,269 Humbug. 289 00:17:07,312 --> 00:17:09,105 Okay, why are you doing that? 290 00:17:09,355 --> 00:17:11,149 - What? - Mouthing. 291 00:17:11,357 --> 00:17:12,817 What are you talking about? 292 00:17:13,151 --> 00:17:16,154 You're mouthing along to the movie. 293 00:17:16,362 --> 00:17:18,823 So? I've seen the movie a hundred times. I know all the words. 294 00:17:19,032 --> 00:17:22,785 I understand that, but it's annoying. 295 00:17:23,870 --> 00:17:25,914 So then don't watch me. 296 00:17:26,122 --> 00:17:28,625 I wasn't watching you, okay? 297 00:17:28,833 --> 00:17:33,463 But I can see it in my periphinal vision, and it's distracting. 298 00:17:34,839 --> 00:17:36,382 It's peripheral. 299 00:17:37,467 --> 00:17:38,718 What did I say? 300 00:17:38,927 --> 00:17:41,054 You said "periphinal." 301 00:17:42,013 --> 00:17:43,264 No, I didn't. 302 00:17:43,514 --> 00:17:45,725 Okay, fine, you didn't. Can I watch the movie now? 303 00:17:45,975 --> 00:17:46,976 Go ahead. 304 00:17:47,185 --> 00:17:50,772 It's a poor excuse for picking a man's pocket every 25th of December. 305 00:17:51,231 --> 00:17:53,024 I said peripheral. 306 00:17:53,816 --> 00:17:55,944 It's the family more than me... 307 00:17:56,152 --> 00:18:00,615 For God's sakes, wash your feet. They stink. 308 00:18:01,324 --> 00:18:04,077 Okay, it's not my feet, it's my socks. 309 00:18:05,036 --> 00:18:06,829 Well, burn them. 310 00:18:07,580 --> 00:18:10,416 Funny, you didn't have a problem with my feet when the stock was at 12. 311 00:18:10,625 --> 00:18:12,252 Okay, here we go. 312 00:18:12,502 --> 00:18:14,963 Look, Stinky, you're the one who begged me to buy back in 313 00:18:15,129 --> 00:18:18,383 just in time to ride the plummet. 314 00:18:18,591 --> 00:18:22,720 They got the approval. 315 00:18:23,429 --> 00:18:24,806 Right, the approval. 316 00:18:24,973 --> 00:18:27,016 "Oh, I could sink my teeth into the approval." 317 00:18:27,225 --> 00:18:30,395 You know what? Why don't you sink your teeth into my ass? 318 00:18:30,812 --> 00:18:32,272 That's nice. It's very ladylike. 319 00:18:32,438 --> 00:18:35,525 What a delicate little flower I married. 320 00:18:37,026 --> 00:18:40,780 Well, Doug, at least I know not to buy high and sell low, okay? 321 00:18:40,989 --> 00:18:43,908 So here's a tip. Why don't you buy yourself some instinct? 322 00:18:44,158 --> 00:18:45,478 You know, that's a real good idea. 323 00:18:45,660 --> 00:18:48,371 I'll go down to the bank, take out a little of my Christmas bonus... 324 00:18:48,538 --> 00:18:51,082 Oops, it never made it there! 325 00:18:54,210 --> 00:18:57,964 You know what? You could pin this on me if you want to, Doug. 326 00:18:58,131 --> 00:19:00,633 But remember, you're the one who sold. 327 00:19:00,842 --> 00:19:02,885 - You're the one who panicked. - Oh, here it comes. 328 00:19:03,094 --> 00:19:04,334 Okay, go ahead, say it, say it. 329 00:19:04,512 --> 00:19:06,472 Chunky cost us money. Come on. 330 00:19:06,639 --> 00:19:08,099 Come on, say it. It doesn't matter. 331 00:19:08,349 --> 00:19:10,143 Well, Chunky did cost us money. 332 00:19:10,351 --> 00:19:14,230 I can't believe you just called me Chunky. 333 00:19:15,064 --> 00:19:17,901 Hey, kids, come here. I wanna show you something. 334 00:19:18,109 --> 00:19:21,779 Okay. Come on, double time. 335 00:19:21,988 --> 00:19:24,824 Come on, let's go. Quick, quick, quick. 336 00:19:25,867 --> 00:19:28,703 I scrapped all the other junk and I went out and I got this. 337 00:19:29,537 --> 00:19:31,497 So, what do you think? 338 00:19:37,170 --> 00:19:40,757 I shouldn't have told you about my Christmas bonus in the first place. 339 00:19:40,965 --> 00:19:46,179 Oh, sure, why don't we just sell the stock? It's just about low enough. 340 00:19:46,387 --> 00:19:47,388 - Fine, sell. - Good. 341 00:19:47,597 --> 00:19:50,266 When it goes back up on Monday, you'll be all, "Oh, Chunky sorry." 342 00:19:50,516 --> 00:19:51,976 - Again with the Chunky? - Yes. 343 00:19:52,185 --> 00:19:55,104 - Back it down. - Both of you stop it. 344 00:19:56,022 --> 00:19:57,899 How sad this is. 345 00:19:58,149 --> 00:19:59,789 It's Christmas Eve, and all you two can do 346 00:19:59,984 --> 00:20:02,445 is argue about a couple of nickels and dimes. 347 00:20:04,197 --> 00:20:05,990 Let me tell you something. 348 00:20:06,157 --> 00:20:07,450 The best Christmas I ever had 349 00:20:07,659 --> 00:20:11,162 was with your mother in our first house, the one in Flatbush. 350 00:20:11,371 --> 00:20:16,167 We were broke, we had no heat, no hot water, and a leaky roof. 351 00:20:16,334 --> 00:20:17,961 But we loved it. 352 00:20:18,127 --> 00:20:19,504 You know why? 353 00:20:20,880 --> 00:20:22,840 Because you had each other. 354 00:20:23,091 --> 00:20:24,550 Because we had vodka. 355 00:20:26,636 --> 00:20:28,513 So now come in and let's have some shots. 356 00:20:39,232 --> 00:20:40,233 I'm sorry. 357 00:20:41,609 --> 00:20:43,653 I'm sorry too. 358 00:20:44,904 --> 00:20:47,115 - Let's just sell the stock. - Yes. 359 00:20:47,323 --> 00:20:49,784 Who cares how much we lose? At least we'll be done with it. 360 00:20:49,993 --> 00:20:53,246 Let's just dump it and be happy with the life we have. 361 00:20:53,413 --> 00:20:54,956 Yeah. 362 00:20:55,123 --> 00:20:57,333 - Okay? - Yes. Merry Christmas, baby. 363 00:20:58,084 --> 00:21:00,044 Merry Christmas. 364 00:21:08,428 --> 00:21:11,347 Although it really can't go any lower, can it? 365 00:21:11,556 --> 00:21:14,309 I was just thinking the same thing. 366 00:21:15,602 --> 00:21:16,603 Maybe we should keep it. 367 00:21:16,811 --> 00:21:20,148 Maybe we should buy more. You know, Harry bought more. 368 00:21:20,315 --> 00:21:23,651 Harry knows. He's a very, very smart man. 369 00:21:23,818 --> 00:21:24,903 So we'll buy some more? 370 00:21:25,069 --> 00:21:26,309 How are we gonna get the money? 371 00:21:26,487 --> 00:21:28,865 I don't know. A second mortgage? 372 00:21:29,073 --> 00:21:31,034 Better yet, cash advance on our credit cards. 373 00:21:31,200 --> 00:21:33,703 Yeah, because we get the miles. 374 00:21:42,257 --> 00:21:46,803 And in financial news, Shominy.com, this week's darling on Wall Street, 375 00:21:47,012 --> 00:21:53,185 plummeted on news that its CEO has 11 prior convictions for stock fraud.